06132013 by Metro Spirit

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WHINELINE Which is greater? The number of Contempt of Congress citations Mr. Holder will get or... the contempt for Congress Mr. Holder has??? I read recently that a survey of our little criminal campuses (AYDC) ) revealed (secretly of course) that

29.3 percent of them were abused. For the ranting robots out there this is a serious problem that must be eleminated. The inmates are probably laughing their rear ends off watching the witch hunt focusing on their jailers. Give me a break, is the next survey going to ask them if they feel they were unjustly incarcerated and will the headline read “Children

unjustly jailed” based on the childrens responses. Geez Austin, with all that driving around that you claim as job-related on your tax forms, it’s a wonder you didn’t get audited any sooner! But while you are driving around, could you pick up some M&Ms for us next time, please?

What’s up with the commercial about the prissy waitress complaining that cigarette smoke bothers her, and she shouldn’t have to put up with it on her job? She took the job knowing people would smoke there. Great to hear from Robert Long, again. He brings a lot of class to your paper; Would love to see him as a regular contributor, again.

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o r t e m IRIT SP If this country continues to elect Talibangelicals like Paul Broun, this country is doomed! (continued on page 34)

04 06 07

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EVENTS CALENDAR JENNY IS WRIGHT ART 45

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SLAB SIGHTINGS THE 8

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INSIDER RUFFIN’ IT AUSTIN RHODES

WHINE LINE

Metro Spirit is a free newspaper published weekly on Thursday, 52 weeks a year. Editorial coverage includes local issues and news, arts, entertainment, people, places and events. In our paper appear views from across the political and social spectrum. The views do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher. Visit us at metrospirit.com.© 15 House, LLC. Owner/Publisher: Joe White. Legal: Phillip Scott Hibbard. Reproduction or use without permission is prohibited. One copy per person, please.

CONTENTS

Did We Miss the Train Again?: High-speed rail inches closer, but is Augusta backing away? Judging Traffic: Proposal takes minor traffic violations out of the courts by creating new Traffic Violations Bureau Fortunate Father’s Day: Fort Gordon father and daughter plan to celebrate Father’s Day on home turf Rolling On: Operation Rolling Thunder rolls out of town

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INSIDER@THEMETROSPIRIT.COM Insider is an anonymous, opinion-based examination of the hidden details of Augusta politics and personalities.

SIDER

Smoked Sausage For sheer entertainment value, it’s tough to beat the Augusta Commission’s committee meetings. The committees are where the sausage is made, and the 10 sausage makers do their best to keep everyone entertained, even if it’s not always intentional. The Heery International contract extension had a little bit of everything. Heery International oversees Augusta’s SPLOST projects — the big stuff — and it’s time to extend their contract. Commissioners tend to have almost as much fun with contract extensions (remember all the fun they had with Gold Cross) as they do with RFPs, and this was no different, especially since some commissioners are bound to want that contract extended more than others. For the last 10 years or so, Heery has been paid very generously to oversee those SPLOST projects — some at more than $200 an hour — and Heery very generously gives back in the form of special funding for commissioners’ community events, campaign contributions and skybox tickets at Atlanta Falcons games. Lately, both Alvin Mason and Corey Johnson have been explaining their relationships with Heery when they’d much rather be telling everyone why the other guy would make a lousy mayor. Largess aside, Fred Russell was worried about how changing horses in midstream could affect some of those big projects the city’s still got going on, while Wayne Guilfoyle was putting Heery’s Forrest White through an interrogation that occasionally showed everyone just how intertwined Heery is with city government. A couple of times, commissioners seemed generally surprised to hear certain key personnel were in fact Heery employees and not part of city government. The fun increased when commissioners questioned Butch Gallop of Gallop and Associates, one of Heery’s subcontractors who seemed to have an even sweeter deal than Heery itself. Gallop, who attends nearly every committee and commission meeting, bills the city only four hours a week. He is supposed to be aggressively recruiting local participation. The icing on the cake for many, though, was when activist Al Gray offered those in attendance his opinion of the contract. Gray is a polarizing figure on the commission and among city employees, and seeing him emerging from the audience to give his two cents (the actual value is debatable, going up and down depending on who you talk to) seems to be perplexing to many. Yet up he seems to come and advise he does. In the end the vote to extend the relationship failed. 4

METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

Patching Things Up Paul Simon’s proposal to merge the First Tee with the Augusta Municipal Golf Course is still lacking details, but it continues to gain ground with commissioners, who seem eager to show no hard feelings about all the bad things they accused him of during the whole TEE Center/parking deck debacle. The Patch matters that much. It matters so much, in fact, that commissioners were willing to buy into a shorter course and an expensive renovation that would have the course close for six to eight months. According to Simon, the city should agree to the merger because it would reduce costs, make a profit, provide a first-class golfing experience for all, help recruit new business and support the First Tee, a worthy program if ever there was one. He even threw in the fact that the course could be the golfing home to Paine College, though when questioned he admitted he hadn’t talked to them about it — it just seemed like a good idea. ASU has their own golf course, why shouldn’t Paine have its own course, too? Costs would be split 25/75, with the smaller Patch paying the least amount. Until the course turns a profit, there would be no charge to operate it. Once it turns a profit, the profit would be shared 50/50. Having been burned and befuddled by previous plans, commissioners seemed to be more than happy dealing with the devil they know. And why not? Even if they get burned down the road by some unforeseen business wrinkle, they know that the Patch will be in good hands. Better hands, in fact, than it’s been when it’s been in their own.

Sleeping Late So is Columbia County District 3 school board member Mike Sleeper gearing up to run for another political office? Sleeper, who somehow manages to get in front of every pen, microphone and camera, was the lone vote against Columbia County School’s $177 million budget, which would include a tax increase of about $40 per $100,000 in assessed value. Columbia County doesn’t like tax increases, and politicians have problems winning when they vote for them. Sleeper has been on record preferring furloughing employees for a couple of days. Though that, too, is harsh in Columbia County, and though it obviously doesn’t sit well with school employees, it allows him to preserve his conservative credentials, such as they are.

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The Other Costner

Adults using valedictorian to advance their own agendas When I first got wind of this whole Roy Costner story, I had trouble contextualizing it of its own accord. In case you don’t know, Roy Costner is the valedictorian of a South Carolina high school, and recently defied school board — and federal government policy — by reciting the Lord’s Prayer at his graduation ceremony as part of his speech. The reaction from each side of the political spectrum has been, to put it mildly, predictable: Fox News anchor Megyn Kelly all but soaked her swivel chair while interviewing Costner, barely finding the breath to gush words like “remarkable,” “brave” and “awwwww.” The reaction of the liberal media — i.e. the Great Satan — has been a tad more subdued, though you practically feel a gust of wind, so great is the velocity of their eye rolling. A few sphincters have also, I suspect, involuntarily, surreptitiously tightened. I watched the video of Costner’s speech, as well as a few interviews, and the worst thing I can say about him is that he’s difficult to get a bead on. He’s just… kind of a bro. For his Fox News appearance, he dressed like a sophomore third baseman posing for homecoming dance photos; his beard is unkempt yet inoffensive; his tiny gold cross necklace was only slightly noticeable against his white undershirt (see above) and I only really saw the damn thing because I was looking for it, due to the headline. And he doesn’t sound, at least, like he’s doing this for the attention. His responses to Kelly’s questions were unrehearsed, and he seemed nervous as hell, though nowhere close to the awshucks demeanor that Jimmy Stewart — and only Jimmy Stewart — could pull off. All in all, Costner seems fairly genuine, if completely unaware of the social implications of his actions, not to mention the damage it’s already caused and will continue to cause. Mind you, I’m not — nor should anyone, if I’m being particularly judgmental — take an empirical stand against prayer, or even public prayer. Just like the mainstream emergence of same-sex rights doesn’t mean you have to divorce your wife and run off with the milkman — though wouldn’t it be kind of quaint, as infidelity goes? — freedom “of” religion operates in complement to freedom “from” religion: each may worship if/as he or she

METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

pleases, though not to an extent that governmental representation is at all implied, or is otherwise foisted on the populace at large. Hence this controversy. Let me put this another way: Roy Costner is 18. Freaking 18. Do you remember how much of an idiot you were at that age? When I was 18, I was barely a year removed from an identity primarily characterized by Jncos, Mountain Dew and professional wrestling. If you’ve led a fairly stable, even cloistered life up that point, chances are that you haven’t had much of an opportunity to develop any sort of broadened, thoughtful worldview. You have no concept of how your actions — especially in an era whose identity is so swathed in viral news/videos and watchdoggery, and dominated by ideologues — may affect those in your immediate social vicinity, not to mention the rest of the country, or even the rest of the world. It was an illconceived, shortsighted decision; but then again, so are most decisions 18-year-olds make. So Roy gets a pass. Truly, he does. Two people — or sets of people — who do not, however, get a pass: first, Roy’s parents. When interviewed regarding the speech, Roy’s father recounted how he told his son that if Roy felt like this was something he was being led to do, then he should go ahead and do it. Here’s why that’s inexcusable: a father, at least one not hungry for publicity, should know better. A father, at least one who’s lived a life worth living, should possess something of a more learned cultural experience and outlook than his teenage son. I have no way of knowing how extensive the conversation was, whether or not the father may have expressed any degree of reluctance, or with how many caveats he may have layered his final advice. But the fact of the matter is that he left this socially atomic decision in the hands of a teenager, and that is almost scarier than Roy’s own decision to go through with it. Second: high-profile conservatives and their persecution complex. Any time that a modicum of social progress is made — the expelling of Creationism from science textbooks, more restrictive gun laws, same-sex rights — these attention-starved dingbats use it as an excuse to prop up their belief that they, somehow, are now

the ones being oppressed. To be clear, I don’t think this is what Costner had in mind when he did what he did; remember, teenagers are legally braindamaged. His limited worldview combined with what is obviously — and I’m being genuine here — a serious attempt to be true to and stand up for his faith conspired to make it seem like a good idea. But conservative personalities — who, like Papa Costner, are old enough and educated enough to know better, and frankly just don’t give the tiniest crap — are loving this, because they are now able to frame the plight of white, middle-class Christians in the context of civil rights. And while that definitely holds water if we’re talking Roman-and-tigers, or some of the more brutally oppressive regimes operating in the world today, Christianity in this country certainly doesn’t need any help standing on its own two feet. Nobody is refusing to provide Seattle Christians with flowers for their wedding; nobody is trying to make it illegal for Christians to have sex in Virginia. Most unforgivable, however, is the use of a pretty innocent 18-year-old who doesn’t know any better as a pawn in these ongoing ideological games. Because of all the extra attention and glad-handing, he’s going to think there were no ramifications, no other, more complex social implications to ever consider. Eventually, of course, he’s going to find out. But it’s going to take that much longer, and be that much more painful.

JOSHRUFFIN, a Metro Spirit alum, is a published

journalist and poet who just received his MFA from Georgia College & State University. He was once the most un-intimidating bouncer at Soul Bar.

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The Right Thing Done the Wrong Way As much as all intelligent, Constitution-loving, American patriots should be horrified at the incredible revelations made by the recent NSA whistleblower, if we are truly honest with ourselves, we would admit that he probably should be hunted down and killed, the sooner the better. God it pains me to write that, but I swear I cannot think of another solution to keep our national security secrets out of the hands of those who want to see the United States of America, and all who call it home, reduced to a smoldering grease spot. Edward Snowden was an underachieving high school dropout when he joined the Army in 2004. After a training accident broke both his legs, and ended his brief military stint, his love for, and talent with, computers put him on a career path with the National Security Agency. Exactly what he did for them, and what he was doing for one of their contractors after leaving the employ of the agency, is not exactly known. This is what he said in an interview with The Guardian, as reported by TPM Media: “My name is Ed Snowden, I’m 29 years old, I work for Booz Allen Hamilton as an infrastructure analyst for [the] NSA, in Hawaii. I have been a systems engineer, a systems administrator, [a] senior advisor for the Central Intelligence Agency’s solutions consultant, and a telecommunications information systems officer.” And with that, the NSA leak story had a face. Snowden, who sat for the interview with The Guardians’ Glenn Greenwald and Laura Poitras in Hong Kong on June 6, wore a button-down shirt left open at the top, partially rimless glasses and a sweep of stubble. The accounts he gave to both The Guardian and The Washington Post, along with a few other press reports, have provided the first sketches of the man behind what may turn out to be one of the most significant national security leaks in American history. “I’m no different from anybody else,” Snowden told The Guardian. “I don’t have special skills. I’m just another guy who sits there day to day in the office, watches what’s happening, and goes, ‘This is something that’s not our place to decide, the public needs to decide whether these programs and policies are right or wrong.’” Of course what Snowden went on to describe hints that many of the worst fears of the world’s most rabidly paranoid political commentators and activists have been well founded: That the NSA has been using its vast powers of government, and the best espionage technology that taxpayer dollars can buy, to break most if not all of its own rules about domestic data collections on God knows how many American civilians and business entities. Snowden is right: It is not the NSA’s place to decide what it is allowed to watch, hear or read that is produced by innocent American citizens. Our email, phone conversations and Skype sessions should never be viewed as fair game for police review without specific cause and due process under the law. He was 100 percent correct in all that he said. But he was 100 percent wrong in the way that he decided to bring the likely illegal practices to a halt.

13JUNE2013

Simply put, Snowden’s whistleblowing has not only thrown the entire leadership of our intelligence community under the bus, but it has undermined the faith and support that most of us have had in most American security agencies since the day we saw the twin towers fall 12 years ago. And it has also given great aid and comfort to our enemies, both foreign and domestic. So what could Ed Snowden have possibly done to correct these amazingly overbearing and illegal policies that would have been effective, but not brought this important watchdog and American institution to its knees in such a public way? Instead of going to the press first, he could have made his case to the politicians who ultimately control all our clandestine security activity. A carefully worded but blunt summation of the situation could have been sent to the top three Republican and Democrat leaders in each House of Congress, with the admonition that if immediate corrective actions were not made, the same summation would be sent to all major media outlets, with the list of the names of the politicians who failed to act when warned of these specific, hideously anti-American tactics and policies employed by the NSA. As a veteran intelligence worker, Snowden is well aware that any improper discussion or revelation of agency activity is not only a felony, but it could get him shot for treason. And that could be with, or without, an American jury making that call. Of course, Snowden could not follow exact protocol, because the NSA’s own hierarchy, up to the top, was acting outside the law. So we get that he had to “take it to the people.” However, in the interest of national security, he should have first given the “people’s” trusted elected proxies the chance to stop the corruption and fix the problem. He did not, and it is a miracle that he has survived as long as he has. Think about it: The man accessed and copied dozens of pieces of highly sensitive intelligence, and promptly absconded to China. What would James Bond have done with such a person, and how quick would he have done it? How many other intelligence officers disagree with American policy, and what may Snowden’s resulting “stardom” inspire them to do? The recently revealed appalling behavior of the IRS pales in comparison to the outrageous reach the NSA has established as a matter of routine business, but at least we can dismantle the IRS without a drop of American blood being spilled. If the attention generated by Snowden’s whistleblowing impacts the legitimate missions of our clandestine guardian agencies, which American cities could be the scene of our next attacks, and how many of our seriously homicidal enemies will benefit?

AUSTINRHODES

The views expressed are the opinions of Austin Rhodes and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

AUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

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ERICJOHNSON

Judging Traffic

Proposal takes minor traffic violations out of the courts by creating new Traffic Violations Bureau

Richard Slaby, chief judge of the State Court of Richmond County, wants to reclassify traffic violations and establish a Traffic Violations Bureau to relieve the solicitor general from the burdens of processing the increasing number of traffic violations. The effect would be to drastically decrease the number of cases coming through the state court. At Monday’s committee meetings, Slaby said that of the 254 cases on the morning’s calendar, 89 percent would have been eligible to go through the Traffic Violations Bureau, a number he expects to increase. Slaby authorized the Administrative Office of the Court to perform a study looking at figures from 2006 to 2008. The study anticipated between 10,000 and 15,000 traffic citations a year going through a Traffic Violations Bureau. “Talking with the sheriff about this, I think it would be more than that,” Slaby said. “Since he’s now established a traffic division, he’s writing more citations. I suspect there will be more activity going through here.” Sheriff Richard Roundtree’s decision to rededicate 40 officers to the traffic division changed the numbers even before the three-month traffic operation called Rolling Thunder brought an extra focus and an increased dedication of manpower to traffic incidents. According to Solicitor General Kellie McIntyre, the numbers were ballooning already. “Rolling Thunder started February 14 and ended this past weekend, but in the first six weeks of the year, the 8

METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

Sheriff’s Office had already written 2,000 citations that we processed through our office,” she said. Though the Traffic Violations Bureau process would save considerable time spent on paperwork and processing, the process remains similar up to a point. Currently, if you are charged with a speeding ticket, the ticket stays with the Sheriff’s Office for 10 days. If you don’t pay it during those 10 days, it works its way through the Solicitor’s Office and the Clerk of Court until the day of your actual trial. Once it moves out of the Sheriff’s Office, it’s treated as a misdemeanor crime, triggering different forms of information gathering. With the Traffic Violations Bureau, you would simply pay your fine at the Traffic Violations Bureau. The violation would go against your license, but you would not be guilty of a misdemeanor. Administrator Fred Russell voiced his support for the project. “Several years ago — 2010 — we began this conversation and the timing didn’t seem right to bring this forward,” he said. “But based on the current conditions, based on the number of citations that are currently being written as well as the cost of the additional employees, I think we’ve been able to close the gaps fairly well. It seems to me at the moment, this is one of the more progressive things that we could possibly do to not only serve the citizens of Augusta, but to make sure that we emphasize the need for traffic safety, but do it in a way that doesn’t criminalize the issue to the point where the individual thinks they’re a criminal when they’ve just made a mistake.” Russell said he would endorse the plan and that the cost of the two additional employees Clerk Elaine Johnson told Slaby she’d need to process the cases on

her end would be well returned by an increased level of service, if not in the dollars that would be generated by the plan. He suggested that if the committee recommended Slaby proceed — and given the work involved, Slaby wanted to get that commitment before moving forward — he would attempt to put it in the budget in November, to be effective sometime in early 2014. Slaby emphasized that shifting the violations to the Traffic Violations Bureau would decriminalize traffic violations, making them fineable violations rather than misdemeanors, which would take offenders out of the system, bypassing the Solicitor General’s Office to a large extent and bypassing the public defender’s office, because the offenses aren’t crimes anymore. The reclassification would free up the solicitor general to handle more pressing matters and keep those guilty of minor traffic violations from potentially going through the probation system. However, anyone wishing a bench trial or a jury trial would be allowed that opportunity. Though Russell seemed willing to set aside money for the new employees in the new budget, Commissioner Donnie Smith made it clear he would like to see the money come from reduced workload of the solicitor’s office and the Public Defender. Using Slaby’s numbers, he argued that if 89 percent of the cases would be eliminated by the Traffic Violations Bureau, those freed up workers could be reassigned. McIntire protested the move, saying her people had too much to do as it was while Slaby stressed that he was currently simply looking for conceptual support before putting together a detailed plan. 13JUNE2013

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LAURAPERRY

Fortunate Family

Fort Gordon father and daughter plan to celebrate Father’s Day on home turf Specialist Chelsae Whitfield

Sergeant First Class Sheldon Whitfield

For Specialist Chelsae Whitfield and her father, Sergeant First Class Sheldon Whitfield, Father’s Day is a day they’ve almost always been able to celebrate together, despite the fact that they’re both in the Army. The two have served together in the same unit for nearly two and half years. “I’ve only missed one,” says Chelsae, 23. “That was last year when I was in Korea.”

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“Yeah, she’s only missed one, and unless I was deployed, I’ve always been here,” says Whitfield, 40. “I was in Iraq last year while she was in Korea. I think we talked to each other on the phone or Skyped each other, but other than that, it was just a normal day.” According to Whitfield, it’s much more common in the military to have a father and son or a husband and wife working together. Even a mother and son are more common than a father and daughter. Statistics supplied by the National Fatherhood Initiative, a nonprofit focused on improving the well being of children by increasing the proportion of kids growing up with fathers, show that about 593,000

active-duty service members and nearly 300,000 U.S. reservists are dads. For Whitfield, serving with his daughter has been a lesson in the speed of communication. “Anytime there was maybe a small issue or something that she may have done wrong, it came back to me immediately,” he says. “It was a matter of seconds that I would know about it. Anything good or bad — it was an immediate response.” Though Whitfield says the Army is good about providing family time, not everyone is able to serve alongside a family member, and Chelsae sees how tough that distance can be on other members of her unit. Still, family has guided both throughout their journey with the Army. “I joined when I was 17, and she’s the reason I joined — right there,” Whitfield says. “I wasn’t bound for college right then, and living with my parents was not an option, so I wanted to do something for myself. My dad was a soldier for 28 years and he’d just retired right before I graduated high school. He said it was a great option. I joined and I never looked back.” For Chelsae, her father was her guiding influence. “I joined to say thank you,” she says. “She had a good recruiter,” Whitfield says, smiling. “I told her both. It was, ‘This is not really what I want you to do, but at the same time, you’ve got to do something and you can’t just sit around twiddling your thumbs.’ I gave her the options and she looked over them. I told her what it could do for her and what it did for me.” Whitfield says that before Chelsae joined, he and his own father were the only two in his entire family to serve in the military, and though they both know they are fortunate to have actual family close by, Whitfield, who is preparing to retire, knows the Army operates as a kind of family, too. “When you come to a new place, you adopt a whole new family besides your own,” Whitfield says. “If something happens to one of these kids, or one of your friends, or one of the servicemen around you, you feel it, especially when someone passes away. When their families are deployed, they step in. They help each other. I’ve seen guys cut other people’s yards and wash their wives’ cars, and help with the kids. It’s definitely a second family.”

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ERICJOHNSON

Rolling On

Operation Rolling Thunder rolls out of town

With Operation Rolling Thunder now complete, the big question is whether or not Augusta drivers have learned anything. In conjunction with the Governor’s Office of Highway Safety, the high-visibility campaign was an intentional effort to strong arm area drivers into driving safely. Extra officers from all over the state and road checks were just some of the ways law enforcement officials tried to force drivers into compliance with local driving rules. According to Lt. Lewis Blanchard of the Community Services Division, it worked. Fatalities per month this year compared to last have declined 62 percent and during the operation there were no fatalities on nights that had road checks. Getting the most buzz throughout the community has been the 32 road checks, which basically shut traffic down to a stop in certain areas as law enforcement officials checked everything from insurance and registration to sobriety. “Here’s the good thing about roadblocks, whether you like them or not — people know road checks are out there,” Blanchard says. “And if you know the road checks are out there and you publicize it well, it will alter behavior. It will make people think twice because they know they have a much better chance of getting caught if they drink and drive. That’s why we believe we saw fatalities go down and that’s why we believe that when we’re driving around at night, we see a lot more cars left in the parking lots. We saw taxis being used in an extreme amount.” While bar and restaurant owners have complained that the threat of road checks drastically cut their business, the fact is that even toward the end of the operation, the numbers continued to drop on the DUI arrests, which was their goal. “There are pros and cons to both road checks and regular traffic enforcement,” Blanchard says. “But we were able to see that obviously you do catch a decent amount of impaired drivers and especially things that you wouldn’t know other than a regular traffic stop. For example, child seat violations or the suspended licenses.” Over the course of the three-month operation, deputies issued 58 speeding citations, four reckless driving citations and 66 uninsured motorist citations. The also issued 1,166 traffic and equipment warnings, made 17 felony arrests, apprehended 39 fugitives and recovered one stolen vehicle. Deputies also issued 307 DUI citations, 295 suspended license violations and 33 seatbelt citations. The most surprising number, however, was the number of child seat citations: 488. “Never in a million years would we have thought we’d have so many child seat violations,” Blanchard says. “Four hundred eighty-eight in three months — that’s just insane. I get why an adult doesn’t want to wear a seatbelt — I’m not saying it’s a smart decision, but okay… you’re an adult and you don’t want to wear your seatbelt. But I can’t imagine any parent in today’s society placing their child in a vehicle unsecured knowing that at the same time of night we’re out there having gotten 300 DUIs right on the exact same roadways they’re on.” That DUI number is something else that surprises him. “To be honest, based on the numbers we’ve seen over the years, I wouldn’t have thought we would have arrested over 300 people for DUIs, especially with all the media attention it got. The good thing was, we saw a steady decline, but what’s sad is that out of the deaths we have had this year, the majority of them are alcohol related.” Now that the extra enforcement is no longer here, will Augusta drivers get complacent and go back to their old, dangerous way of doing things? “The state’s not sending us any free extra help anymore,” Blanchard says. “We don’t have the extra manpower from the state to accomplish those goals, but hopefully we altered thinking. In cooperation with the media, we made it a top priority for people to understand that drinking and driving in this area will not be tolerated.” 13JUNE2013

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METROSPIRIT 11

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STIR CRAZY

By Elizabeth C. Gorski / Edited by Will Shortz 97 In the past 98 Works overtime, say 102 One of four items worn by a bride, traditionally 105 Having the necessary work credentials 106 “I Got ___” (silly children’s song with the line “Why is everyone laughing at me?”) 107 Hardly fancy? 108 Sugary ending 109 Fella 110 Infection fighter 111 Calls to Bo Peep 114 Navy pilot putting on a show 116 Alice Walker novel … or a hint to 12 squares in this puzzle 121 Reverses 122 Alvar who designed Finlandia Hall 123 Wind-driven craft 124 Minor, in law 125 Wrap one’s brain around 126 Wall Street workers Down 1 One going [hic!] 2 Kyrgyzstan range 3 Blend 4 Encrust, as mud might 5 Terrestrial 6 Quirky 7 Mauna ___ 8 Flubbed it 9 Seven-foot runner 10 Rhine siren 11 Opt 12 Just so 13 “Shoot” 14 Crummy advice 15 Medium ability, for short 16 “Puzzles of the Black Widowers” author 17 Draw (from) 18 Tyler of rock 21 Sleuth, in slang 23 ___ Genesis 27 Prepared, as apples for baking 30 Fraternity letters 31 Lab fluid 33 Kind of poetry 34 Knickers wearer 35 Exchange for cash 36 “Dies ___” 37 Likely to win

38 Faucet brand 39 Smokey the Bear spot, e.g., for short 42 More iffy 45 Snoopy’s archenemy 47 Cries a river 49 A.T.F. agents, e.g. 50 “Casablanca” role 51 Tatters 52 Pageant title 54 Forest Whitaker’s Oscar-winning role 56 “Fuggedaboutit!” 57 Puccini’s “Nessun ___” 58 Dalí’s homeland, to Dalí 60 Amount at stake 63 Barbecue application 64 Suffix with smack 65 Super-popular 66 Corn bread 67 “The Far Pavilions,” for one 68 One tablet, maybe 70 Matched (up) 74 Magnanimous 78 Social division 79 One-named designer 80 Go ___ (deteriorate) 82 Web periodical 83 Nickname for Secretariat 84 Belief system 86 Visibly embarrassed 87 Songbirds in “The Rubáiyát” 89 Jewish males’ org. 91 Pastrami go-with 93 Features 94 Skating move 96 Relentless fighter 98 Strengthened 99 Herbal brew 100 Hannah who wrote “Men in Dark Times” 101 Priestly robe 103 Promenade 104 Close 106 Amtrak bullet train 110 “There’s gold in them ___ hills!” 112 Mil. addresses 113 Chair piece 115 “… the grace of God ___” 116 There may be a high price on it 117 She-bear: Sp. 118 Oversaw 119 ___ mater 120 U.F.O. crew

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Across 1 “You Send Me” singer 9 Adams with the 1991 hit “Get Here” 14 Hippie’s wear 19 Evergreen with aromatic blooms 20 Jazz club highlights 21 Tailored sleeve detail 22 Chattered on and on and on 24 One who works at home? 25 Thought 26 Upright 27 Ruler divs. 28 Early second-millennium year 29 Harriet Beecher Stowe’s “The Pearl of ___ Island” 32 Like many thrones 33 Theme of many a country song 35 Extremely exasperated 38 1990 Steve Martin/Rick Moranis comedy 39 According to 40 Part of a wedding celebration 41 ___ hers 43 Its last word is “zyxt”: Abbr. 44 Aqua 46 Blazers, e.g., in brief 48 Young cow 50 You can believe it 53 One of the little things in life? 55 Title song of a 1970 Van Morrison album 58 K-12, in education 59 A guitar may be connected to it 61 Final exam handout 62 Formal military attire 65 Phase associated with Picasso’s “The Old Guitarist” 69 Substitute currency 71 Best 72 Board, as a carousel 73 “You’re ___ one, Mr. Grinch” 75 Fluffy neckwear 76 “What’s going ___ there?” 77 Imagined series of events 81 Final non-A.D. year 85 Sleuth, in slang 86 Brutal castle dweller in folk tales 88 Thomas Gainsborough masterpiece, with “The” 90 1929 Ethel Waters hit whose title is a question 91 Author Santha Rama ___ 92 Brown ermine 95 Coal unit

E E R A T B A T D B Y M O H O U S U P S T G E E E R S A R N S T Y T H I U G E C I K F A S S L O C I A S O A P A S G E T L E L M T S L I D

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ERICJOHNSON

Did We Miss the Train Again? High-speed rail inches closer, but is Augusta backing away?

Nearly four years ago, the Metro Spirit took a look at the Southeast High Speed Rail Corridor. As drawn then, the corridor, one of nine across the nation, included Atlanta, Greenville, Charlotte, Columbia, Macon, Savannah and Jacksonville but not Augusta. Now, after a study has developed a list of possible routes between Atlanta and Charlotte, Georgia’s second largest city is back on the map. But does anyone here care enough to keep them there? The Southeast High Speed Rail Corridor (SEHSR) was originally proposed by the U.S. Department of Transportation in 1992 to run from Washington, D.C., to Charlotte. Eventually, that route was to link up with the existing high-speed rail in the Northeast Corridor (Boston to Washington) to provide an even more robust and long-range travel opportunities. According to Natalie Dale, a GDOT spokesperson, the Atlanta to Charlotte corridor is an additional last leg of that Southeast Corridor. “High-speed rail in itself is already sort of engrained 14 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

in the transportation culture of the Northeast,” she says. “People use it for work, play and various activities on a daily and weekly basis, and because of the proximity of the population centers, they can use it to get to work and they can use it for weekend travel, whereas in the South, it’s just not really part of our transportation culture yet.” Engrained or not, high-speed rail is still an iffy proposition. A 2009 Government Accountability Office report concluded that while high-speed rail tends to attract riders in densely populated corridors like the Northeast, there is still quite a bit of uncertainty regarding cost estimates and overall public benefits. Obviously, other countries have a head start on highspeed rail. France started its high-speed rail program in 1981 and Japan, the first nation to develop high-speed rail system, has a ridership of 300 million. These programs required significant national funding, and prior to President Obama’s stimulus package, which committed $8 billion to high-speed rail, the U.S. has never been willing to make that kind of investment. Even with that $8 billion, the Southeast is a long way from actually seeing any high-speed trains. “We want to be very specific that this is just a study,” Dale says of the current benchmark. “There is no funding mechanism for an actual rail line. This

is just really to look at the Southeast High Speed Rail Corridor to see if it’s feasible and, if it is, to integrate the Atlanta to Charlotte corridor into the transportation philosophy of the Southeast.” Just because it’s feasible doesn’t mean people are going to be interested in using it, though, which is part of the reasoning behind three recent public meetings that unveiled the six proposed lines between Atlanta and Charlotte while asking for public comment. The meetings were held in Charlotte, Greer, S.C., and Suwanee, Ga. “I don’t want people who were in communities that weren’t near the meetings to think that that was a comment on the importance of that community,” Dale says. “It was just that we had to do one in each state.” The city of Athens brought a van full of people to last week’s meeting in Suwanee. “Athens was far and away the most vocal and had the highest number,” Dale says. “I think when you look at what Athens is as a city, as a college town, they sort of have the culture that is very intrigued by highspeed rail.” According to Doc Eldridge, president of the Athens Area Chamber of Commerce, attending the meeting was almost an obligation. “We have been in this dialogue for 30 years,” he 13JUNE2013

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says. “Seriously, it’s been that long.” Previously, the discussions have revolved around the so-called Brain Train, a commuter route that would have connected nine colleges and universities between Atlanta and Athens. “When that didn’t happen by the year 2000, that conversation sort of disappeared,” Eldridge says. “We really thought it was going to happen around the years 1999 to 2001.” So convinced were they that Eldridge says the city located, paid for and built a multimodal center because they felt sure the commuter rail was a lock. It wasn’t, and now the multimodal center, which has a parking area and is right next to the greenway, is used for Athens Transit and the UGA buses, but not trains. “We went to the hearings on rapid rail because we certainly wanted to take a look at it and get our feelings in,” he says. “It’s not a commuter rail, but it’s a step in the right direction, connecting 13JUNE2013

the International Airport in Atlanta with metro Atlanta, Athens, Greenville, Charlotte and on to Washington, D.C. Unfortunately, I don’t think any of this is going to happen while I’m still alive.” At the meeting, the Athens delegation made a pitch for Alternative 6, the Athens route, by pointing out the need for a large university to have easy access to airports, which the route would give them at both ends. The same could also be said for Augusta, whose new combined university hopes to be an educational institution on par with UGA and Georgia Tech. Throw in the regional medical community, and Augusta would seem to have the same needs and desires. Regardless of the needs, the desires seem to be lagging at an official level: Augusta was not represented at the meetings. “I didn’t know about it,” says Walter Sprouse, executive director of the Development Authority of Richmond County. “I saw in the paper that there are three or four routes proposed, but we received no notification here that there was going to be a public meeting about this.” Still, he says he supports the plan. “The concept, I think, is ideal,” he says. “It’s probably a concept, to be totally honest, that should have been discussed in 1958 whenever the Eisenhower Interstate Highway System started construction.” His point: even if the lines weren’t built at the time, there would at least be existing right of ways linking major population centers. A good bit of the groundwork would already have been done. That said, he says the fact that they’re even looking that far ahead now is commendable. “I applaud them for having the discussions,” he says. “If magically they had the funding for it, then obviously we’d be thrilled to have it come through Augusta, and I’m sure Columbia would love that, too.” In fact, he expresses more enthusiasm for the linkage east then the one going west. “Even though we are so oriented in the state of Georgia at looking toward Atlanta, we also have to remember that where we’re seated, we are exactly the same distance to Charlotte,” he says. “So if this were to happen, I think the greatest beneficiary would be people who live in Columbia and Augusta going back and forth and the people in Columbia and Charlotte going back and forth.” To his way of thinking, including Augusta and Columbia makes the most sense for everyone. “If the people in Atlanta were to

THIS EVENT IS OPEN AND FREE TO THE PUBLIC.

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PUBLIC LIBRARY BOOK TALK / AUTHOR SIGNING FEATURING:

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AUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

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look at it and say ‘What would be beneficial as far as ridership goes?’ and the people in Charlotte would do the same thing, I think they would take a look at the numbers and take a look at the population centers of Augusta and Columbia and say, ‘Oh, this is a no brainer — it needs to be that route to connect these four big cities,’” Sprouse says. City Administrator Fred Russell says he also wasn’t aware of the meeting, but he says the idea hasn’t escaped his attention, either. “The mayor and I are talking about it next Monday,” he says. “It’s something we need to get involved with because I think it’s very important to us. We need a seat at that table.” Being connected to such big population centers would allow Augusta to be a quasi bedroom community, he says. Or visa versa. But such long-range objectives — even ones that seem to offer such impressive dividends — are sometimes hard for a community to focus on, Russell admits. “We’re not real good at being visionary,” he says. “We’re getting better, but we still spend a lot of time talking about tomorrow when we need to be talking about 10 years from now. While both are important, 10 years is really going to make the difference, in my opinion.” Two of the six proposed routes are drawn to go through Augusta. One would use the interstate highway right-of-way and the other would share existing rail. They are longer than the other routes, but have the advantage of linking the most people.

out there any way they can, because that’s how these studies are shaped and that’s how these lines are chosen and identified,” Dale says. “If Augusta or another community of interest feels that they are being overlooked, now is the time to get community officials involved. Now is the time to develop that community group to meet and discuss and develop a plan to educate the community about this and make it a big deal.” Because it uses all new, dedicated tracks that don’t share or run along an interstate corridor, the Greenfield line initially earned the highest score. But because of all of those things, it’s also going to have the highest price tag, which might make other options ultimately more attractive should the time ever come to take things from the drawing board to the great outdoors. The elephant in the room, of course, is funding. Motor fuel tax can only be used for roads and bridges, and what the states get from the federal government for intermodal transportation is continually cut back. And several years ago, the state decided that intermodal funding at the state level had to come from the General Assembly, so the General Assembly decides how much cash rail gets. Regardless, transportation is never a fast-moving process. Dale says that June 2015 is the goal for identifying the preferred route, whether or not there is funding. “It’s in our benefit to be prepared and to have a very clear vision for what rail would look like so that, if the day comes and there is funding, we could hit the

Alternative 1 would cut north through Suwanee, Gainesville, Greenville and Spartanburg, while Alternative 6 would go through Lawrenceville and Athens. Initial evaluations show the Augusta alternatives as weaker than some of the others, but Dale says that shouldn’t deter Augusta from pursuing it, should it be something they want to do. “This is a study, so it’s important that everyone in a community who wants to be heard takes the opportunity and takes the initiative to get their opinions

ground running,” she says. Sprouse agrees. “I guess the only fear is that somebody in 2045 will say, ‘Well, if they’d have just started this thing in 2013, look where we could be right now.” Those who want to have their opinions heard can complete the survey at dot.ga.gov/travelingingeorgia/rail/ AtlantatoCharlotte/Pages/default.aspx.

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Earth Wind and Fire may have had their heyday in the 1970s, but the six-time Grammy winners continue to rock on. They bring their elaborate stage show to the James Brown Arena Tuesday, June 18, at 7 p.m. Tickets are $37-$61. Visit augustaentertainmentcomplex. com.

ENTERTAIN

Arts

Adult Artist Workshop: Artists’ Books with Cyanotypes will be held Saturday, June 15, from 10 a.m.-5 p.m. at the Morris Museum of Art. Artist and adjunct photography instructor at USC Elliot Duduk guides participants through the process of creating handmade artists’ books illustrated with cyanotypes. Materials included. $60 for members; nonmembers, $75. Call 706-724-7501 or visit themorris.org. GRU Art Portfolio Prep for Rising High School Students will take place Monday-Friday, June 17-21, at the Morris Museum of Art. Participants will explore drawing, painting, basic sculpture techniques and art history in a college setting with GRU art department faculty. Designed for students in grades 9-12, this camp provides a college experience while giving the students the tools to build their fine art portfolio. All materials included. $220. Pre-registration required. Call 706-828-3808 or visit themorris.org.

Tuesday and Thursday night beginning at 7 p.m. and lasting 2-3 hours. Painting materials provided. Bring your own wine and clothes to paint in. $30; $25 with military I.D. Pre-registration required. Call 706-868-0990 or visit pstudio.com.

Exhibitions

14 Stations, a photography exhibit by David Michalek based on traditional devotional the Stations of the Cross using men and women transitioning out of homelessness, shows Monday-Thursday, June 17-20, at Sacred Heart Cultural Center. A free artist’s reception will be held Monday, June 17, from 5-6:30 p.m. Call 706-826-4702 or visit augustaarts.com. Sidewalk Chalk Installation and Viewing is Thursday, June 20, from 10 a.m.-6 p.m. on the sidewalks surrounding Sacred Heart Cultural Center. Call 706-826-4702 or visit augustaarts.com.

Artist David Michalek, whose 14 Stations exhibition hangs in Sacred Heart Cultural Center June 17-20, will speak about his work at the Mayor’s Prayer Breakfast Tuesday, June 18, at 8 a.m. at Sacred Heart Cultural Center. Free. Call 706-826-4702 or visit augustaarts.com.

Community Art Installation, featuring work by homeless community members using natural and found materials, shows Monday-Thursday, June 17-20, at the Augusta Canal, the south side of Butt Bridge at 15th Street. Free. Call 706-826-4702 or visit augustaarts.com.

Expert Panel Discussion on the State of Homelessness in Georgia, held in conjunction with David Michalek’s 14 Stations exhibition, is Wednesday, June 19, at noon at Sacred Heart Cultural Center. A brown-bag lunch will be provided. Free, but pre-registration required. Call 706-826-4702 or visit augustaarts.com.

Openings will be held Thursday, June 20, from 6-8 p.m. at the Morris Museum of Art for two exhibitions: North Carolina Pottery from the Collection of Dr. Nancy Farmer and Dr. A. Everette James and Tradition/Innovation: American Masterpieces of Southern Craft and Traditional Art. A reception will follow a talk by Dr. Everette James and Scott Power, regional supervisor/ preservation specialist at the North Carolina State Historic Preservation Office. Free. Call 706-724-7501 or visit themorris.org.

Local Artists Response to 14 Stations Exhibition, featuring Jerod Gay, Joyce Law, Tara Scheyer, Jezibel Anat and others, is Wednesday, June 19, at 7 p.m. at Sacred Heart Cultural Center. Free. Call 706-826-4702 or visit augustaarts.com. Annual Arts Awards and Meeting, presented by the Greater Augusta Arts Council, is Thursday, June 20, at 6 p.m. at Sacred Heart Cultural Center. $20 per person; $150 for a table of eight. Dinner is provided and preregistration is required. Call 706-826-4702 or visit augustaarts.com. Day of Art, hosted by the North Augusta Artists Guild, is each Tuesday from 11 a.m.-3 p.m. at the Arts and Heritage Center of North Augusta and includes a group of artists painting in the center who will answer questions or allow visitors to join in. Call 803-441-4380 or visit artsandheritagecenter.com. Corks & Canvas painting classes for adults 21 and over are held every 18 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

Dead Musicians Show, in which more than 20 local and regional artists have created works to honor dead musicians, will show throughout the month of June at Sky City. Visit skycityaugusta.com. Marianna Williams Exhibit will be at Sacred Heart Cultural Center through June 28. Call 706-826-4700 or visit sacredheartaugusta.org.

Music

Music in the Park will be held Thursday, June 13, at 7 p.m. at The Verandah at Maude Edenfield Park, Brookside Drive, North Augusta. Keith Gregory will perform. Free. Call 803-442-7588. Dallas Duff will play for the Moonlight Music Canal Cruise, 7-8:30 p.m., Friday, June 14. $25 per person; passengers may bring aboard snacks and beverages. Call 706-823-0440, ext. 4, or visit augustacanal.com.

Music at the Morris will take place Sunday, June 16, at 2 p.m. at the Morris Museum of Art. The Garden City Chorus will sing a selection of four-part harmonies. Free. Call 706-724-7501 or visit themorris.org. Candlelight Jazz will be presented Sunday, June 16, at 8 p.m. at the River Stage, 8th St. at Riverwalk. David Heath Project will perform. $6; free for children under 13. Visit gardencityjazz.com.

Earth Wind and Fire will perform Tuesday, June 18, at 7 p.m. at the James Brown Arena. $37-$61. Visit augustaentertainmentcomplex.com. Music in the Park will be held Thursday, June 20, at 7 p.m. at The Verandah at Maude Edenfield Park, Brookside Drive, North Augusta. Savannah River Brass Works will perform. Free. Call 803-442-7588. Concert to benefit the GRU Cancer Center will be held Thursday, June 20, at 7:30 p.m. at the Maxwell Theatre on GRU’s Summerville campus. Vocalists Lauren Snouffer and Mark Diamond will perform opera and musical theater selections. $5 or free with a GRU student ID. VIP tickets are $10 and include access to a backstage reception with the performers. Visit gru.edu

Literary

Diamond Lakes Evening Book Club meets Monday, June 17, at 6 p.m. at the Diamond Lakes Branch Library. The book to be discussed is “What Alice Forgot” by Liane Moriarty. Light refreshments provided. No registration necessary. Call 706-772-2432 or visit ecgrl.org. CSRA Writers will meet Monday, June 17, at 6:30 p.m.at Georgia Military College, 115 Davis Road. Writers needing a support group are invited to attend and bring eight copies of a manuscript to be critiqued. Call 706-836-7315. Book Talk and Author Signing featuring Paul Harvey will be held Thursday, June 20, at 7 p.m. at the Headquarters Library, 823 Telfair St. Harvey, a professor of history at the University of Colorado, is the author of “Moses, Jesus and the Trickster in the Evangelical South” and “The Color of Christ: the Son of God and the Saga of Race in America.” Free. Call 706-8212600 or visit ecgrl.org.

Dance

Augusta Christian Singles holds dances every Saturday night, beginning at 8 p.m., with free dance lessons at 7 p.m. Dances are held at Ballroom Dance Center, 525 Grand Slam Drive (off Evans to Locks Road) in Evans. $10. Admission includes light meal or heavy refreshments, desserts, soft drinks and coffee in an alcohol/smoke free environment, and music includes country, shag, oldies and more. Dress is casual (jeans are fine). 13JUNE2013

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All singles 18 years old and up are welcome. Visit christiandances.org.

theaugustamarket.com.

Theater

Health

“Cousins Blood of My Blood” will be presented Saturday, June 15, at 7 p.m. at the USC-Aiken Convocation Center. $24-$29. Call 803-643-6901 or visit uscatix.com.

Flix

Family Movie Matinee: “ParaNorman” will be shown Wednesday, June 19, at 1 p.m. at the Evans Branch library theater. Free. Call 706-312-1358 or visit ecgrl.org. “Silver Linings Playbook” will be shown Wednesday, June 19, at 5:30 p.m. at the Friedman Branch Library. Call 706-736-6758 or visit ecgrl.org.

Special Events

Music and Menus Food, Fun and Music Festival will be held Friday-Saturday, June 14-15, at Evans Towne Center Park. Gates open at 5 p.m. Friday and noon Saturday. The Marshall Tucker Band, the Mason Jars and County Line will perform Friday. Saturday’s festivities include local restaurants competing in a culinary challenge while bands take the stage every hour. Funk You closes out the weekend. $20 in advance; $30 day of show. Call 706830-0677 or visit wbbq.com or eagle1057.com.

Mobile Mammography Screenings will be on the following dates and at the following locations, from 8 a.m.-3 p.m.: Thursday, June 13, at the Edgefield Medical Center; Friday, June 14, at Walgreens at the corner of Washington Rd. and Belair Rd.; Monday, June 17, at Internal Medicine Partners, 3121 Peach Orchard Rd.; Tuesday, June 18, at university Hospital; and Wednesday, June 19, at Christ Community Health Services. Free through Medicare. Appointment required. Call 706-774-4149 or visit universityhealth.org. The Happiest Baby on the Block Educational Session will be held Thursday, June 13, at 7 p.m., Suite 310 of Medical Office Building 1, 3623 J. Dewey Gray Circle, on the Doctors Hospital Campus. This class teaches moms,

Community Health Screening will be held Wednesday, June 19, from 7:30-10:30 a.m. at the H2U building, 1305 Interstate Pkwy in Augusta. Screenings for total cholesterol, blood sugar and blood pressure. Free. Call 706-651-6716. Stress Management Classes are held at the University Hospital Heart & Vascular Institute at 8:15 a.m., 9:15 a.m. and 1:45 p.m. each Wednesday. Call 706-774-3278 or visit universityhealth.org. Heart Attack and Stroke Prevention Orientation is held every Tuesday at 2 p.m. at University Hospital’s Heart & Vascular Institute (Classroom 3). Free. Call 706-7745548 or visit universityhealth.org.

Plan Your Family Tree will take place Monday, June 17, at 4:30 p.m. at the Appleby Branch Library. The Augusta Genealogical Society will help participants get started building a Family Tree. Pre-registration required. Call 706-736-6244 or visit ecgrl.org.

Cardiopulmonary Rehabilitation program covers topics such as coronary artery disease, heart attack and CHF at the University Hospital Heart and Vascular Institute. Program is held each Wednesday at 8:15 and 9:15 a.m., and 1:45 p.m. Call 706-774-3278 or visit universityhealth.org.

June is Adopt-a-Cat Month. The CSRA Humane Society is sponsoring this event to raise awareness of its no-kill shelter by Lake Olmstead. Call 706-261-7387 or visit csrahumanesociety.org.

Support

Wine Tasting will be held at Wine World in North Augusta, 5-8 p.m., the first Friday and third Thursday of every month. Call 803-279-9522 or visit wineworldsc.com.

Weekly Wine Tastings at Vineyard Wine Market in Evans are held 4:30-6:30 p.m. Fridays, and 1-6 p.m. Saturdays. Call 706-922-9463 or visit vine11.com. Saturday Market at the River is each Saturday through November 23 from 8 a.m.-2 p.m. at the 8th Street Bulkhead downtown and features vendors, food, drinks, entertainment and a group run that begins at 8 a.m. Visit

13JUNE2013

The Better Way Back: Prevention and Treatment of Back and Leg Pain will be presented Thursday, June 13, from 5-7:30 p.m., at Doctors Hospital, South Tower, Classroom 1. This seminar will feature Bill Walton, Basketball Hall-ofFamer & XLIF® surgical patient as well as Nate “Rock” Quarry, Retired Mixed Martial Arts Fighter & XLIF® surgical patient as they discuss living with back pain and their difficult decision to move forward with spinal surgery. This program is only open to individuals currently experiencing back or leg pain who may be considering surgery as a treatment option. Free. Call 706-6514343 or visit doctors-hospital.net.

Childcare and Babysitting Class will be held Saturday, June 15, from 9 a.m.3 p.m. at Trinity Hospital of Augusta. Course content includes playtime, hand-washing, telephone calls, infant © 2013 SketchCrowd, LLC / www.sketchcrowd.com and child feeding, diapering, sleep time and providing emergency care. For students 11-14 years old. $30. Call 706-481-7000 or visit trinityofaugusta.com.

Cruizin’ for Carlos, a benefit car and motorcycle show and motorcycle ride and an event that also includes family friendly fun, will be held Saturday, June 15, from 10 a.m.-3 p.m. at Liberty Park in Grovetown. $10 per bike for the ride and $5 for passengers and $15 to participate in the show. Call 706-726-5532 or visit facebook.com/ cruizinforcarlos.

Evans Towne Farmers Market is held on the grounds of the Columbia County Public Library each Thursday through June from 4:30-7 p.m. All meats, eggs, dairy and produce will be from local and sustainable farms. There will also be cooking demos and education, local artisans with handcrafted goods, live music, local food vendors and weekly events. Visit evanstownefarmersmarket.com.

education and training. Financial assistance is available to Medicaid and Peach Care eligible families. $10. Pre-registration required. Call 706-7217606 or visit grhealth.org/safekids.

Breast Cancer Support Group meets from 12:30-2 p.m. on the Thursday, June 13, at the GRU Cancer Center, 1411 Laney Walker Blvd., First Floor, Community Room. This group supports women and families affected by breast cancer. Call 706-721-4109 or visit gru.edu/classes.

Quit starin’ at me like that, Larry. It bounced to me fair and square.

Cancer Survivor Support Group will take place Thursday, June 13, from 6-7 p.m., upstairs at Augusta Oncology Associates, 3696 Wheeler Road. This is a support group for people with all different types of cancer and their family members. Free. Call 706-651-2283.

dads and other family members the techniques they can use to calm a fussy baby. Call 706-651-2229 or doctors-hospital.net.

PFLAG Augusta meets Thursday, June 13, at 7 p.m. at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Augusta, 3501 Walton Way Ext. PFLAG Augusta offers support to parents, family, friends and allies of LGBT people and LGBT people themselves. Visit pflag.org.

Car Seat Class is Thursday, June 13, from 5:45-8 p.m. Safe Kids Office, Building 1010C, 1225 Walton Way. These classes offer car seat safety,

ALS Support Lunch and Learn meets 11 a.m.-2 p.m. on Friday, June 14, at Georgia Regents Medical Office Building, 1446 Harper St., Fourth Floor,

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Room 4306. This support group provides opportunities for individuals to share their personal experiences, and learn more about strategies for preserving the independence and quality of life for ALS patients and their loved ones. Lunch is provided. Pre-registration required. Call 706-7212681 or visit grhealth.org/classes. Trauma Support Group meets Wednesday, June 19, from noon-1 p.m. at Georgia Regents Medical Center, Fourth Floor West Conference Room (4069). Former patients as well as family, friends and others affected by a trauma are invited to attend. Call 706-721-4633 or 721-3264, or visit grhealth.org/classes. Blood Cancer/BMT Support Group meets 11:30 a.m.-1 p.m. on Wednesday, June 19, at the GRU Cancer Center, 1411 Laney Walker Blvd., First-Floor, Community Room This group provides educational and emotional support to patients, families, friends and caregivers. Call 706-721-9134 or 7211634 or visit grhealth.org/classes. Overeaters Anonymous meets at St. Andrews Presbyterian Church, 7:30 p.m., Tuesdays and at Covenant Presbyterian Church, 1:30 p.m., Saturdays. Call 907-854-1509. AA meets every Sunday and Wednesday at 7:15 p.m. at Aiken Regional Medical Centers’ Aurora Pavilion, and includes an open discussion. Call 800-322-8322 or visit aikenregional.com. Adult Sexual Assault and Rape Support Group provides group counseling at University Hospital for those who have experienced sexual assault, incest, rape or childhood sexual abuse. Call 706-724-5200 or visit universityhealth.org.

Hospital’s Lori Rogers Nursing Library, JMS Building. All burn survivors, and their families and friends are welcome. Call Tim Dorn at 706-6516660 or visit doctors- hospital.net. Cardiac Support Group meets three times a year. Free. Pre-registration requested. Call 706-774-5864 or visit universityhealth.org.

Education

YA@AL: Library for the College Bound will be presented Tuesday, June 18, from 2-4 p.m. at the Maxwell Branch Library. Dig into the basics of using college libraries and how to identify primary sources and navigate online databases for college level research. Call 706-793-2020 or visit ecgrl.org.

Families Who Have Lost a Baby Support Group is offered by GRU. Call 706721- 8299 or visit gru.edu.

Intermediate Spanish Language Class is each Monday from 2:30-4 p.m. at the Friedman Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-7366758 or visit ecgrl.org.

Gamblers Anonymous is a support group for those who wish to stop gambling. Call 800-313-0170.

Beginner’s Spanish Language Class is each Monday from 4-5 p.m. at the Friedman Branch Library. Call 706-736-6758 or visit ecgrl.org.

Celiac Disease Support Group. Open to anyone who has celiac disease, is gluten intolerant or on a gluten free diet. Group meets on the third Tuesday of each month from 7-8:30 p.m. at Trinity Hospital in Room 120 of the Summerville Professional Building adjacent to the Hospital. Visit trinityofaugusta.com.

Free Tutoring for all ages, offered by GRU’s Literacy Center, is available by appointment Monday-Thursday, from 4-8 p.m., at the center at 1401 Magnolia Drive. Appointments required. Call 706-737-1625 or visit gru.edu.

The Chatterbox Club of Augusta, a support group for individuals and their families who have experienced a laryngectomy, meets the second Sunday of each month (except June and July) at 3 p.m. at Trinity Hospital in the Sister Mary Louise Conference Room. Call 706-481-7359 or visit trinityofaugusta.com. Lupus Support Group meets at the Headquarters Branch Library. Call 706-394-6484 or 706-821-2600, or visit ecgrl.org. Narcotics Anonymous meets Fridays and Sundays at 7:30 p.m. at Trinity Hospital of Augusta. Visit na.org.

GED Classes are held Tuesdays and Thursdays from 5:30-8:30 p.m. at the Headquarters Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-8212600 or visit ecgrl.org. English as a Second Language (ESL) classes are offered every Tuesday from 6-7:30 p.m. at Headquarters Branch Library. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org. Fort Gordon Toastmasters meets 11:30 a.m. each Wednesday in the Organizational Conference Room (Fish Bowl) on Fort Gordon Army base. Open to the public. Visit fortgordon.toastmastersclubs.org. Adult Hebrew Class is taught at Congregation Children of Israel at 10:30 a.m. every Thursday. Email office@cciaugusta.org or visit cciaugusta.org.

Alcoholics Anonymous is a support group for those who wish to stop drinking. Call 706-860-8331.

Overeaters Support Group meets locally. Call 706-785-0006 or visit trinityofaugusta.com.

Beyond the Bars is a support group for those with incarcerated loved ones. Call 706-855-8636.

Parents of Hearing-Impaired Children meets locally. Call 706-481-7396 or visit trinityofaugusta.com.

Alcoholics Anonymous open discussion meeting takes place every Sunday and Wednesday, 7:15 p.m. at Aurora Pavilion in Aiken. Call 806-641-5000 or visit aikenregional.com/hospital-services/behavioral-health-services.

Reach for Recovery is presented locally by the American Cancer Society. Call 706-731-9900 or visit trinityofaugusta.com.

Guided tours of 1797 Ezekiel Harris House offered by appointment only Tuesday-Friday, and Saturday 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Last tours of the day begin at 4p.m. Adults, $2; children, $1. Call 706-722-8454 or visit augustamuseum.org.

Recovery Support Group meets 7:30 p.m. Sundays and Fridays. Call 706855- 2419.

Historic Trolley Tour of Augusta aboard the Lady Libby boards at the Augusta Museum of History at 1:30 p.m., Saturdays. See historic sites

Burn Support Group meets every Tuesday at 10:30 a.m. at Doctors

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Computer classes are offered every Thursday at 6 p.m. at the Wallace Branch Library. Call 706-722-6275 or visit ecgrl.org.

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and hear spooky legends, including the legend of the famous Haunted Pillar. $12, including admission to the museum. Reservations required 24 hours in advance. Call 706-722-8454 or visit augustaga.org. Tours of the Boyhood Home of President Woodrow Wilson are held regularly. Adults $5; seniors $4; kids K-12 $3; under 5 years free. Reservations required for groups of 10 or more. Call 706-722-9828.

Sports-Outdoors

Augusta GreenJackets home games are as follows: Thursday, June 20, vs. the Kannapolis Intimidators at GreenJackets Stadium. $1-$15. Call 706-922-9467 or visit greenjacketsbaseball.com. Triple 8 Group Run meets at 8th and Reynolds, 8 a.m., every Saturday through Oct. 26. Choose your distance: 3, 6 or 8 miles. Open to everyone. Visit theaugustamarket.com. Adult swim lessons are offered at the Family Y of Downtown Augusta for ages 13 and up. Days and times vary by branch. Members $55 per month; nonmembers $85 per month. Registration required. Visit thefamilyy.org.

at 6 p.m. at Riverview Park in North Augusta. Entry fee, $5; ace pool, $1. Call 803-215-8181 or visit augustadiscgolf.com. Road Bike Ride meets each Thursday at 6:30 p.m. at Andy Jordan’s Bicycle Warehouse downtown for an approximately 25-mile ride at a moderate to fast pace. Front and rear lights, as well as a helmet, are required. Call 706-724-6777 or visit andyjordans.com. Guided Trail Rides at Hilltop Riding Stables at Fort Gordon are available Saturdays at 9 a.m., 10:30 a.m., noon, 1:30 p.m. and 3 p.m.; Sundays at 9 a.m., 10:30 a.m. and noon; and Wednesday-Friday at 11 a.m. with reservations 24 hours in advance. All trail rides are on a first-come, first-served basis, and participants should arrive 30 minutes prior to the trail ride starting for sign in procedures. $23-$30. Call 706-791-4864 or visit fortgordon.com. Lakeside Rideouts at Hilltop Riding Stables at Fort Gordon are each Sunday beginning at 1:30 p.m. on a first-come, first-served basis. The ride, which begins at 2 p.m., is a two-hour guided ride to Wilkerson Lake. $45-$50. Call 706-791-4864 or visit fortgordon.com.

Olympic-style Tae Kwon Do, taught by Master Michael L. Weintraub, is each Tuesday and Friday at 5:30 p.m. at the Kroc Center. Call 706-364-5762 or visit krocaugusta.com.

Adapted Aquatics for Special Populations offered at the Wilson Family Y by appointment. Members, $11 per session; non-members, $22 per session. Discount for additional siblings. Call 706-922-9664 or visit thefamilyy.org.

Tae Kwon Do is offered at the Wilson Family Y, Family Y of Augusta South and Family Y of North Augusta. Registration required. Visit thefamilyy.org.

The Augusta Fencers Club is open five nights a week from 5:30-9 p.m. and most Saturday mornings from 10 a.m.noon. Visitors always welcome. Call 706-722- 8878.

Kickball League registration is available for a new adult co-ed league at Riverview Park. Call 941-716-3163 or visit augustakickball.com.

BlazeSports Swim Team, for all ages of physically challenged swimmers who want to train for competition, meets at the Wilson Family Y. Members, $35 a month; non-members, $50 a month. Pre-registration required. Visit thefamilyy.org.

Wheelchair Tennis Clinic, presented by the Walton Foundation for Independence, meets each Monday at 6 p.m. (weather permitting) at The Club at Rae’s Creek. Free and open to the public. Call 706-826-5809 or email alsalley@wrh.org. Yoga Class at Euchee Creek Library meets every Tuesday at 4 p.m. Call 706- 556-0594 or visit ecgrl.org. Weekly Group Runs include the Monday Metro Run meeting at Metro Coffeehouse at 6 p.m.; Monday Intervals meeting at the Family Y track on Wheeler Road at 7 p.m.; the Tuesday Nacho Mama’s Group Run at 6 p.m.; Wednesday’s Blanchard Woods Group Run at 6 p.m.; Wednesday Stay in Shape Group Run at 6 p.m.; Wednesday’s Post Office Hill Training Run at 7 p.m.; Thursday’s Homer Hustle at 6 p.m.; and Saturday’s Stay in Shape Run at 8 a.m. Visit augustastriders.com. The Augusta Furies Women’s Rugby Football Club practices 6-8 p.m. on Tuesdays and Thursdays at Julian Smith Casino for players 18 and up. Email augusta.furies@gmail.com or visit augustafuries.org. The Augusta Rugby Club holds weekly practice sessions at 6:30 p.m. on Tuesdays and Thursdays at the Larry Bray Memorial Pitch in Augusta. Experienced players and newbies ages 18 and up are welcome. Bring a pair of cleats or cross trainers, a mouthguard, gym shorts and a T-shirt. Visit augustarugby.org or Facebook under the Augusta Rugby Club heading. Hott Shott Disc Golf is held each Wednesday at 7 p.m. at Killer B Disc Golf in downtown Augusta, and features games and prizes for all ages and skill levels. $2. Call 706-8147514 or visit killerbdiscgolf.blogspot.com/p/hott-shott.

Civil War 150th Canal Tour, “Food, Fabric and Firepower,” is offered by the Augusta Canal Interpretive Center at 1:30 p.m. daily through 2013. Call 706-823- 0440 or visit augustacanal.com.

Kids-Teens

Avatar Me! will be presented Thursday, June 13, from 9:30-11 a.m. at the Diamond Lakes Branch Library. Using a variety of online tools, participants will create avatars that they can save, export and use on websites and elsewhere. No registration; drop into the computer lab anytime during the session. Best for ages 11-17. Call 706-772-2432 or visit ecgrl.org. Artist and Illustrator Michael P. White will appear Thursday, June 13, from 10-11:30 p.m. at the Friedman Branch Library. Participants will meet and draw with the illustrator of “The Library Dragon,” and take home their own Michael P. White inspired drawing. Best for ages 5 and up, including teens and adults. Groups of 6 or more must pre-register. Call 706-7366758 or visit ecgrl.org. Pollution Solution is Thursday, June 13, from 4:305:30 p.m. at Reed Creek Park. This program includes hands-on activities demonstrating the various types of pollution and their causes and effects, as well as a discussion of the possible solutions and ways to reduce, reuse, and recycle. For ages 7 and up. Children must be accompanied by an adult. Preregistration is required. Free for members; nonmembers are $2 per child. Call 706-210-4027 or visit reedcreekpark.com.

Thursday Night Chain Reaction Ride begins at 6 p.m. each Thursday at Patriots Park in Grovetown. For intermediate to fast-paced cyclists, who average 25-32 miles. Participants should bring their own water and helmet. Call 706-855-2024 or visit chainreactionbicycles.net.

So You Want To Be A Superhero? Will be held Friday, June 14, at 3 p.m. at the North Augusta Branch Library. Come celebrate the Man of Steel and all other superheroes. Come dressed as your favorite superhero or make some superhero disguises. Test your strength with Superhero challenges. Call 803-279-5767 or visit abbe-lib.org.

Riverview Disc Golf League meets each Thursday

Pond Exploration will be held Saturday, June 15, from

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10-11 a.m. at Reed Creek Park. With dip nets in hand, children will explore and learn about what creatures live in the pond. Be prepared to get wet and muddy. For ages 5 and up; children must be accompanied by an adult. Pre-registration is required. Free for members; non-members are $2 per child. Call 706-210-4027 or visit reedcreekpark.com. “Warm Bodies” will be shown Saturday, June 15, at 3 p.m. at the Aiken Branch Library. Free. Call 803-642-2023 or visit abbe-lib.org. Movies at Maxwell: “Flushed Away” will be shown Monday, June 15, at 10 a.m. at the Maxwell Branch Library. Call 706-793-2020 or visit ecgrl.org. Desert Dunes will be presented Monday, June 17, at 3 p.m. at the Appleby Branch Library. Participants will use various grades of sandpaper make a desert dune. Ages 11-17. Free. Call 706-736-6244 or visit ecgrl.org. Teen Program — Board Game Night will take place Monday, June 17, from 5-8 p.m. at the Friedman Branch Library. Come play some board games. Drop in or stay the whole time. Light snacks provided. For ages 11-17 only. Free. Call 706-736-6758 or visit ecgrl.org. Cupcake Wars will be presented Monday, June 17, at 7 p.m. at the North Augusta Branch Library. Limited to 30 teens. Participants will try their hands at decorating a cupcake that will knock everyone’s socks off. Three rounds of decorating already baked cupcakes. Free. Call 803-279-5767 or visit abbe-lib.org. Ventriloquist Tawanna Kelly performs Tuesday, June 18, at 10 a.m. at the Diamond Lakes Branch Library. Tawanna and her friend, Joy, present a fun, family-centered performance. Required registration for groups begins May 13. Free. Call 706-772-2432 or visit ecgrl.org. Sheep on a Ship will be presented Tuesday, June 18, at 11 a.m. at the Appleby Branch Library. Pirate sheep story and a pirate craft. Ages 5-11. Free. Call 706-736-6244 or visit ecgrl.org. The Frog Princess will be presented Tuesday, June 18, at 7 p.m. at the Aiken Branch Library. A fun twist on an old fairy tale. Free. Call 803-6422023 or visit abbe-lib.org. Savanna River Ecolab — Reptiles and Amphibians will be presented Wednesday, June 19, at 10 a.m. at the Maxwell Branch Library. Experience

22 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

local reptiles and amphibians up close. Registration required for groups of six or more. Free. Call 706-793-2020 or visit ecgrl.org. Singing Storyteller takes place Wednesday, June 19, at 10:30 a.m. at the Appleby Branch Library. Bob Linsenmayer presents stories to children through song. Ages 3-11. Call 706-736-6244 or visit ecgrl.org. Children’s Craft — Dinosaur Dig will be presented Wednesday, June 19, at 3:30 p.m. at the Maxwell Branch Library. For ages 6 and older. Registration required. Call 706-793-2020 or visit ecgrl.org. Jazz 4 Teens will be presented Wednesday, June 19, at 6:30 p.m. at the Diamond Lakes Branch Library. Join Garden City Jazz for an exploration of jazz designed for teens and young adults. Snacks provided. No registration necessary. Best for ages 11-17, but all ages are welcome. Call 706-772-2432 or visit ecgrl.org. Clay Fossils will be presented Thursday, June 20, at 11 a.m. at the Appleby Branch Library. Participants will use clay and various items make a clay fossil. Ages 5-11. Call 706-736-6244 or visit ecgrl.org. Movies at Maxwell: “Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade” will be shown Thursday, June 20, at 3 p.m. at the Maxwell Branch Library. Call 706-7932020 or visit ecgrl.org. Watson-Brown Foundation Junior Board needs members. Looking for high-school students to spend one evening a month learning about historic preservation, grants and philanthropy. Call 706-595-7777, email mzupan@hickory-hill.org or visit hickory-hill.org. DuPont Planetarium shows for Saturdays in June are “Solar System Adventure Tour” at 8 p.m. and “Blown Away: Wild World of Weather” at 9 p.m. Weather permitting, the observatory, housing the Bechtel Telescope, will be available for viewing after each show. General admission $4.50; seniors $3.50; 4K-12 $2.50; valid college or military I.D. gets you a 50-percent discount; USCA faculty, staff and students $1. Kids under 4 not permitted in public viewings. Reservations encouraged. Call 803-641-3654. Georgia Connections Academy, a free virtual public charter school has spots for 1,000 K-12 students in Georgia. Call 800-382-6010 or visit connectionsacademy.com/georgia-school/enrollment/home.aspx.

Tae Kwon Do is offered for all skill levels age 5 and up at the Family Y of Aiken County, North Augusta, Augusta South and the Wilson Family Y. Registration required. Visit thefamilyy.org. Ceramics Class, for ages 14 and up, meets Mondays at 9 a.m. or 6 p.m., Tuesdays at 6 p.m., and Wednesdays at 9 a.m. in the Weeks Ceramics Center. Call 803-642-7631 or visit cityofaikensc.gov. Creative Arts offered at the Family Y of North Augusta for ages 5-12 years. Members, $35 per month; non-members, $55 per month. Visit thefamilyy.org. Toddler Time, playtime for children ages 5 and under, is each Monday and Wednesday from 9:30-11:30 a.m. at the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken. $2 per visit; $16 per 10-visit pass. Call 803-642-7631 or visit cityofaikensc.gov. Little Friends Gym, a parent and child class for those ages 6 months-4 years, is held each Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday from 10 a.m.-1 p.m. at the Warren Road Community Center. Call 706-860-2833 or visit augustaga.gov. Story Time is held at the Columbia County Library at 10:15 and 11 a.m. Tuesdays, for kids under 2 years old; at 10:15 a.m. Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays for 2-year-olds; at 11 a.m., Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays for preschoolers; and at 4 p.m. Wednesdays for all ages. Call 706-863-1946 or visit ecgrl.org. Loud Crowd, a supervised after-school program for those ages 4-12, is Monday- Friday from 3-6 p.m. at the Warren Road Community Center. Call 706-860-2833 or visit augustaga.gov. Homeschool PE Time, for elementary school aged kids, meets MondayFriday, from 9-11 a.m. at the Kroc Center. Members free. Call 706-3645762 for non- member prices. Visit krocaugusta.org. Story Time is held at the Diamond Lakes Branch library 10 a.m. each Tuesday. Registration required for groups of six or more. Call 706-7722432 or visit ecgrl.org. Tai Chi Panda, a Chinese martial arts program for kids ages 5-13, meets Tuesdays and Thursdays. Ages 5-7 meet at 4 p.m.; ages 8-10 meet at 5 p.m.; ages 11-13 meet at 6 p.m. Call 706-394-0590 or visit

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augustameditation.com/ taichi.html.

Center. Call 706-860-2833 or visit augustaga.gov.

Preschool Story Time is every Tuesday at Headquarters Branch Library at 10 a.m. Toddler Story Time is every Wednesday at 10 a.m. Group registration required. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org.

Gesher, a teen program for post b’nai mitzvah youngsters (7th-12th grade), meets every other Sunday at Adas Yeshurun Synagogue. Call 706-733-9491.

Story Time is held every Tuesday at 10 a.m. at Friedman Branch Library. Groups of six or more must pre-register. Call 706-736-6758 or visit ecgrl.org.

Seniors

Story Time is every Tuesday at 10:30 a.m. at Harlem Branch Library. Call 706- 556-9795 or visit ecgrl.org.

Silversneakers strength and range of movement class is offered Mondays and Wednesdays at 9 a.m. and Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays at 11:15 a.m., while Silversneakers Yogastretch is offered Mondays and Wednesdays at 11:15 a.m. at the Weeks Center in Aiken. Call 803-642-7631 or visit cityofaikensc.gov.

Kroc Trotters Running Group, for those ages 16 and older, meets at 6:30 p.m. each Tuesday and Thursday at the Kroc Center to run the trails of the Augusta Canal. $15. Call 706-364-5762 or visit krocaugusta.org.

Ceramics Class is offered at 9 a.m. on Mondays or Wednesdays and 6 p.m. on Mondays or Tuesdays at the Weeks Center. Call 803-642-7631 or visit cityofaikensc.gov.

Story Time is held every Wednesday from 10-11:15 a.m. at Wallace Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-722-6275 or visit ecgrl.org.

Computer Classes for Seniors are taught at The Kroc Center Mondays and Thursdays. Registration required. Visit krocaugusta.org.

Story Time is held each Wednesday at 10 a.m. at the Maxwell Branch Library. Pre-registration required for groups. Call 706-793-2020 or visit ecgrl.org.

Fit 4 Ever is offered at the Weeks Center in Aiken on Mondays, Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays from 10-11 a.m. $27 for 10 tickets; free for SilverSneakers members. Call 803-642-7631 or visit cityofaikensc.gov.

Story Time is held each Wednesday at the Appleby Branch Library from 10:05- 10:20 a.m. for toddlers age 18-35 months, and from 10:30-11:15 a.m. for preschool kids age 3 and up. An adult must remain with the child. Call 706-736- 6244 or visit ecgrl.org. Story Time is every Wednesday at 10:15 a.m. for pre-K, and either 11 or 11:30 a.m. for preschoolers at Aiken County Public Library. Call 803-642-2023 or visit abbe-lib.org. Story Time is every Wednesday from 10:30-11 a.m. for toddlers and 11:15-11:45 a.m. for preschoolers at North Augusta Branch Library. Call 803-279-5767 or abbe-lib.org. Story Time at the Euchee Creek Branch Library, for all ages, is held each Wednesday at 10:30 a.m. and each Tuesday at 4:30 p.m. Call 706-556-0594 or visit ecgrl.org. Homeschool Playgroup meets each Thursday at 10:30 a.m. at Creighton Park in North Augusta. Call 803613-0484. Mudpuppies, an arts and crafts program for ages 2-5, is held each Thursday at 10:45 a.m. at the Warren Road Community Center. Call 706-860-2833 or visit augustaga.gov. The Augusta Arsenal Soccer Club Junior Academy, for boys and girls ages 5- 8, meets each Thursday at 5:30 p.m. at the Augusta Soccer Park. Call 706-854- 0149 or visit augustasoccer.com. Fairy Tale Ballet is held at the Family Y of Aiken County. Offered once a week for one month for a total of four classes. Members, $25 a month; non-members, $35 a month. Visit thefamilyy.org. Boy and Girl Scout troops are hosted by Augusta Jewish Community Center. For Boy Scouts, visit troop119bsa.com or email geoffstew@gmail.com. For Girl Scouts, email sbehrend@bellsouth.net. For Daisy/ Brownie Troop, email bdmrev@yahoo.com. Creek Freaks, a Georgia Adopt-a-Stream team of middle- and high-school students, meets regularly at Phinizy Swamp Nature Park to monitor the health of Butler Creek. Call 706-796-7707 or visit naturalscienceacademy.org. Fun-Time Fridays, for ages 2-5, is held each Friday at 10:45-11:30 a.m. at the Warren Road Community 13JUNE2013

Crafters Night is each Monday from 6-8 p.m. at the Kroc Center. Call 706-364- 5762 or visit krocaugusta.org. Simple Cooking Class meets each Monday from 6:308:30 p.m. at the Kroc Center. Call 706-364-5762 or visit krocaugusta.org. The Garden City Chorus, the area’s leading men’s singing group and a member of the Barbershop Harmony Society, is seeking new members. Those interested are welcome to attend Tuesday night rehearsals, held at 7 p.m. at North Augusta Church of Christ on W. Martintown Road. Visit gardencitychorus.org. Bingo is held every Saturday at 1 p.m. at American Legion Post 205 on Highland Avenue. Call 706-495-3219.

Line Dancing is each Tuesday at the Weeks Center in Aiken at 10 a.m. $31 for 10 tickets; free for SilverSneakers Swipe Card members. Call 803-6427631 or visit cityofaikensc.gov. Yoga I and II are offered at the Weeks Center in Aiken on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays from 8:45-9:45 a.m. and on Mondays and Wednesdays from 5:306:30 p.m. Call 803-642-7631 or visit cityofaikensc.gov. Silver Sneakers, a senior exercise class, meets each Wednesday and Friday from 1:30-2:30 p.m. at the Kroc Center. Free. Call 706-364-5762 or visit krocaugusta.org. Tai Chi for Seniors is held 11 a.m.-noon every Thursday at Augusta Jewish Community Center. Call 706-394-0590 visit augustameditation.com/taichi.html. Dancin’ with the Young at Heart, an event geared toward those ages 50 and older although anyone is welcome, is each Friday at 7:30 p.m. at the Aiken DAV. In addition to dancing to Yesterday’s Sounds, there will also be prize drawings, snacks and drinks. $6. Call 803-292-3680.

Spiritual

Bible Teaching Seminar, featuring the topic Where is God (part of the Job series), is Saturday, June 15, from 1:15-2:15 p.m. at the Friedman Branch Library. Participants should bring their Bibles. Call 706-7366758 or visit donaldsao.com. Sunday activities at the Kroc Center include an adult Bible class at 9:30 a.m., youth Sunday school at 9:45 a.m., and a worship service at 11 a.m. Free. Call 706364-5762 or visit krocaugusta.org.

If you would like to see your organization’s events listed in our calendar, please email Amy Christian at amy@ themetrospirit.com. The deadline for each Thursday’s issue is the previous Friday at noon.

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Hobbies

Geocaching 2.0 will be presented Thursday, June 13, from 10:30-11:30 p.m. at the Maxwell Branch Library. Geocaching is a free real-world outdoor treasure hunt. Free. Call 706-793-2020 or visit ecgrl.org. Tangled Threads Quilters Guild is held the second Sunday of every month, from 1-4 p.m., at the Augusta Museum of History. Free. Visit augustamuseum.org. Bingo is held every Sunday at 1:30 p.m. and every

DECLASSIFIED

Wacky Wednesday Story Time is each Wednesday at 10 a.m. in the children’s department of Barnes and Noble in the Augusta Mall. Call 706-737-0012 or visit bn.com.

Monday and Thursday at 7 p.m. at the Fraternal Order of the Eagles Post 1197 on Scott Road. Free. Call 706-495-3219.

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Dad’s Day

While the kids are with their dad, I’ll be with mine For the past several years, The Man has taken The Kids camping for Father’s Day. Some time ago, he asked if I minded. “Hey Babe? Is it okay if I take The Kids camping on Father’s Day weekend?” “Um. As far as I’m concerned, you can take them camping every single weekend. Seriously.” I mean, even if they want to go on Christmas, we can work something out. I was shocked he even asked. We don’t typically ask permission for things like this, and it seemed like a no-brainer. It’s not that I don’t like camping. I grew up going camping and hiking, and while I like it just fine, I don’t mind a weekend to myself, either. I love the Father’s Day tradition they’ve started. Several dads, who have kids of similar ages, pack up the truck for a little car camping in North Carolina. For those who aren’t well versed in camping lingo, this doesn’t mean they sleep in the car, but they can pretty much bring as much stuff as they want, because the car will be right nearby. There are bathroom facilities. For experienced outdoorsmen, this is called candy-ass camping (CAC). I’m not making fun. I prefer CAC myself, and it’s probably the best plan for a large group with limited resources and time. Besides, I doubt the dads are interested in carrying their large coolers of beer deep in the woods. They’re already lugging all the kids’ crap and setting up camp. Car nearby equals cooler nearby. When my people leave, I am left with two choices. I can stay home and enjoy a quiet weekend in my house. It’s an incredibly attractive option. Once you have kids, time along in your home is a luxury. I make lists of things I swear I’ll do, but I usually just savor the peace. Although that sounds great, I often end up going out of town. Last year, I packed up for Colleen and Andy’s Mexican wedding. This year, I’m spending Father’s Day with my dad. He lives in Chicago. Y’all might say this makes it an easy choice, right? Well, yeah, it does. We are going to see “The Book of Mormon,” we have tickets to a late-night Second City show and I’m sure we’ll eat and drink pretty well. He likes wine. He lives on the lake, so we’ll probably walk along the beach. We both like good coffee and morning crossword puzzles.

I’ll tell you why it’s going to be a great weekend, though. I like my dad. Sure most people love their dads, but I like hanging out with mine. We talk on the phone several times a week. I’m sure I call him too much sometimes, but he rarely says he doesn’t have

time to chat. He took me to Paris for my 16th birthday. I knew how to speak French but was intimidated by the natives. I told him what to say. We only fought once. I stand my ground. I knew the best way to get there. We did need a map. I actually read it. I wish I’d been old enough to have wine with him. We’ll just have to go back. Hint, hint. When it came to my wedding, he didn’t ask many questions. He wanted the reception to be a huge party with great music. I think his only request had to do with the bar: Top shelf only. My friends are still thanking him for it. When our band cancelled a mere six weeks before the wedding, he didn’t panic. He found someone but warned me that our planned father/ daughter dance song might be too difficult for the new group. I was a bit disappointed, but it didn’t last long. Little did I know he asked the band to sing it anyway, and they did. “I Could’ve Danced All Night” from “My Fair Lady,” one of our favorite musicals, was our song. Everyone else probably thought it was weird. We didn’t care. We have a bad (but fun) habit of thinking we’re funnier than we really are. If we pick on you, know it means we love you. If you ask us to pass the ketchup, and we start passing it around the table, making sure it gets to everyone but you, expect, “You didn’t ask us to pass it to you.” We always think we have the next idea for “Saturday Night Live.” I’m sure we don’t. Many years ago, I knew I’d found my husband when I woke up and found The Man and my dad talking over coffee. Dad always liked my boyfriends just fine, but now they had things in common. I won’t let it bother me that one interest they share is those nasty five-finger toe shoes. While I hate to miss a great weekend with The Man and Kids, I’ll gladly trade it for a weekend with Dad. He’ll probably be rather embarrassed by the sentimental nature of this week’s column. Hell, who am I kidding? Almost 500 hundred words about him? He’ll love it. And I love him. Happy Father’s Day, Dad! Cheers!

JENNYWRIGHT lives in Summerville with her

husband, who she calls The Man, and two kids, who she affectionately calls The Boy and The Girl. She enjoys taking photos, cooking and playing tennis.

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VALERIEEMERICK

Different “Stations”

Exhibition at the center of four-day A Journey of Community

Art for social change is the central theme for the Greater Augusta Arts Council’s four-day event “A Journey of Community,” which will be centered around a series a photographs by nationally renowned New York artist David Michalek titled “14 Stations.” “14 Stations,” is comprised of images of individuals transitioning out of homeless who have been posed to represent images from the Christian devotional “Stations of the Cross.” However, even though the exhibit is based on a Christian concept, it is not a strictly Christian centered idea. It deals with universal concepts that anyone can identify with. “We wanted to find out what the metaphorical truth value of the work was, so we began to look at it thematically,” Michalek said. “What does it mean simply to fall? The falls in this walk, what they might signify? If Christ encounters his mother, could that mean someone encountering a form of unconditional love? If Christ encounters Simon, who helped him carry the cross, perhaps that’s encountering another form of love, but from a friend who maybe gives you a hand up that saves your life. We just started to make differentiations between each of these stations and tried to see if we could make modern day analogs to each of these scenes.” Many people may recognize the name David Michalek from his exhibit “Slow Dancing,” which was shown in the Augusta Common on three large screens at the inaugural Westobou Festival, said Brenda Durant, the executive director of the Greater Augusta Arts Council. “So, at that time a few of us met David at a general meeting and he talked about some other work that he had done,” Durant explained. “We were fascinated with his description of the 14 Stations work and really wanted to bring that to Augusta, as well — but we didn’t just want to bring in an exhibit, have people walk around and look at it and meet the artist. We wanted to have a story to tell as well.” It is the intent of the event to incorporate arts and community gatherings to draw attention to the transformational work that is being done with Augusta’s homeless population by dedicated organizations. “A year ago we started doing research, about the work being done around town to transition men and women out of homelessness and found that we here in Augusta have an incredible story,” Durant said. “The organizations that are working with the homeless talk to each other, help each other, have amazing success stories and so we started meeting, started out slow with what we were doing, but we started teaching art to the men going through the program at the rescue mission.” Some of the endeavors incorporated to help the homeless include improvisational acting classes and drum 13JUNE2013

and guitar lessons, Durant said. “We did an outreach into the community and got guitars donated for the program and had success with that,” Durant said. “The community stepped forward and helped with guitars. We had a team of people, both in the social service arena and just people who were interested in this project, Gary Dennis helped coordinate art teachers going to the rescue mission, and he was inspired to create a piece of temporary public art on the canal near 15th Street, where the Under the Bridge Ministry takes place every Saturday morning.” Dennis, a local artist who works with the Jessye Norman School of the Arts and Le Chat Noir, is building a labyrinth made of packed dirt and other natural materials that will be on display throughout the four-day event. “It’s a contemplation labyrinth inside of a compass rose,” Dennis explained. “It’s cut into the side of the hill, down to the earth, it will be made of all natural materials and it will go back to a natural state not long after the program is over.” The story of the homeless hit close to home, Dennis said, recalling some work he helped with on another installation piece a few years ago. “I remember working on a project with Lisa Marks a year or two ago when she did a dragon sculpture in front of Old Richmond Academy,” Dennis said. “It was made out of iron hoops, rings and rebar, and then donated trash bags and discarded aluminum cans. It made me think of the homeless community because each day I worked on it we would have folks from the community walk through the workspace and say, ‘Hey! Can I give you a hand?’ So the idea of a very public, outdoor installation kind of for and by the homeless community struck me as something that might be useful and interesting.” Other local artists involved include Jezibell Anat, who helped coordinate and will be

performing with her dance company, Eastern Star Dance Theatre, at the Artist’s Response to “14 Stations,” Jerod Gay, a singer-songwriter, who will perform at the artist’s response. Gay also helped Dennis in working with the homeless, Anat said. Joyce Law, a poet, will also perform at the Artist’s Response to “14 Stations.” In addition to performing, Anat, Gay, Dennis and Durant will serve on the panel to discuss art for social change. They will also be joined on the panel by Rhian Swain. Other events include the Mayor’s Prayer Breakfast, an expert panel discussion on the state of homelessness in Georgia, and a sidewalk chalk art installation. For more information on the events surrounding A Journey of Community, see this week’s calendar section or visit augustaarts.com.

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FEATURED

June 13 13Thursday, Live Music

Malibu Jack’s - KE-JU Maude Edenfield Park, North Augusta - Keith Gregory Mellow Mushroom (Downtown) - AcostA Mellow Mushroom (Evans) - Live and Local Metro Coffeehouse and Pub - Austin Jennings Rose Hill Estate - Preston Weston & Sandra Sky City - Stereotype Somewhere in Augusta - John Kolbeck Tavern at the Bean - Irish Music The Willcox - Live Jazz Wild Wing - Jessup Dolly

The inaugural Music & Menus Festival at Evans Towne Center Park is Friday and Saturday, June 14-15, at the Lady Antebellum Amphitheatre. The Marshall Tucker Band headlines the festival Friday night, with tickets at $20 in advance and $30 the day of the show. Special VIP tickets are also available for $50. Gates open for the show at 5:30 p.m. Call 706-830-0677 or visit evanstownecenterpark.com.

What’s Tonight?

Bar on Broad - Liddle Ugleez Chevy’s Nite Club - Karaoke Cocktails Lounge - Karaoke Fishbowl Lounge - Karaoke Fox’s Lair - Trivia, Soup and Suds Helga’s Pub & Grille - Trivia The Highlander - Butt Naked Trivia Joe’s Underground - Trivia The Loft - Karaoke MAD Studios - Open Mic w/ Southern Boy Buff Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Evans) - Karaoke The Playground - DJ Rana Shannon’s - Karaoke Sky City - Stereotype Soul Bar - DJ Lowterio Surreal at Surrey - College and F&B Night Tavern at the Bean - Ladies Night Villa Europa - Karaoke Wooden Barrel - ’80s Night Karaoke

June 14 14Friday, Live Music

100 Laurens - Dustin Lucas Augusta Canal Moonlight Music Cruise - Dallas Duff Country Club - Tyler Hammond Band Coyote’s - Dave Firmin, Rhes Reeves & the Coyote Band Doubletree - Classic Jazz Evans Towne Center Park - The Marshall Tucker Band, The Mason Jars, Ray Fulcher and County Line Joe’s Underground - Jam Sandwich Laura’s Backyard Tavern - Granny’s Gin MAD Studios - Brian Kathtol Malibu Jack’s - KE-JU PI Bar & Grille - Live Jazz Polo Tavern - JAR Sky City - Liddle Ugleez, Dr. Bread Somewhere In Augusta - Cameras, Guns & Radios The Stables at Rose Hill Estate - Gavin Reily Stillwater Taproom - Blair Crimmins and the Hookers Surrey Tavern - Stereotype Tavern at the Bean - Musicians Hangout Wild Wing - Scott Brantley

What’s Tonight?

Armando’s - Karaoke w/ Rockin Rob Chevy’s - DJ Dougie Club Argos - Friday Night House Party Cocktails Lounge - Grown-Up Fridays with DJ Cork and Bull Pub - Karaoke Eagle’s Nest - Free Salsa Lessons; Latin Dance Party Fishbowl Lounge - Karaoke Iron Horse Bar & Grill - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke with Ryan Moseley Mi Rancho (Washington Road) - Karaoke with Jeff Barnes Mi Rancho (Clearwater) - Three J’s Karaoke 28 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

Ms. Carolyn’s - Karaoke Palmetto Tavern - DJ Tim The Playground - DJ Rana Rebeck’s Hideaway - Open Mic Roadrunner Cafe - Karaoke with Steve Chappel Soul Bar - ‘80s Night Tavern at the Bean - Artist Showcase w/ Gregory Rooftop Wariner Wooden Barrel - Karaoke Contest

June 15 15Saturday, Live Music

The Acoustic Coffeehouse - Open Acoustic Jam Session with Eryn Eubanks and the Family Fold Country Club - Amanda Daughtry Hoze’s Bar - John Berret’s LaRoxes Joe’s Underground - Tony Holiday Band Mellow Mushroom (Evans) - AcostA P.I. Bar and Grill - Smooth/Vocal Jazz Playoffs - The Southern Meltdown Band Polo Tavern - Kenny George Band Sky City - Hip Hop Night w/ Fuzz Jackson Stillwater Taproom - Donald Merkle and the Blacksmiths Surrey Tavern - Live Music Wild Wing - Cover Story

What’s Tonight?

Chevy’s - DJ Dougie Club Argos - Saturday Night Dance Party and Show Cocktails Lounge - Latin Night Fishbowl Lounge - Karaoke Helga’s Pub & Grille - Karaoke The Loft - DJ Richie Rich Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Clearwater) - Karaoke with Danny Haywood Mi Rancho (Washington Road) - Karaoke Ms. Carolyn’s - Karaoke The Playground - DJ Rana Robbie’s - Saturday Night Dance Party Soul Bar - DJ JB Fresh Tavern at the Bean - Karaoke w/ DJ Kenny Curtis Wooden Barrel - Kamikaze Karaoke

June 16 16Sunday, Live Music

5 O’Clock Bistro - Jacob & Phillip Candlelight Jazz - David Heath Project Malibu Jack’s - Playback The Band w/ Tutu Dy’Vine Partridge Inn - Sunday Evening Jazz w/ the Not

Gaddy Jazz Trio Wild Wing - Firmin The Willcox - Live Jazz

What’s Tonight?

Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Washington Road) - Karaoke, Salsa Dancing Polo Tavern - Bingo Night Shannon’s - Karaoke with Peggy Gardner

June 17 17Monday, Live Music

Hopelands Gardens (Aiken) - Mike Frost Shannon’s - Open Mic Night

What’s Tonight?

Applebee’s (Evans) - Trivia Chevy’s - Trivia Club Argos - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Poker Malibu Jack’s - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Trivia The Playground - DJ Rana Robolli’s - Trivia with Mike Thomas Somewhere in Augusta - Poker Wild Wing - Trivia

June 18 18Tuesday, Live Music

Appleby Concert Series - The Don Macey Trio The Highlander - Open Mic Night James Brown Arena - Earth, Wind & Fire Shannon’s - Karaoke Contest The Willcox - Piano jazz

What’s Tonight?

Chevy’s Nite Club - Shag Night w/ Free Lessons Club Argos - Karaoke Fishbowl Lounge - Dart League Joe’s Underground - Karaoke Laura’s Backyard Tavern - Karaoke w/ David Doane Limelight Cafe - Bottom’s Up Karaoke Malibu Jack’s - Poker Mellow Mushroom (Downtown and Evans) - Trivia Mi Rancho - Cornhole Carolina Meeting The Playground - Truly Twisted Trivia with Big Troy Polo Tavern - Karaoke Shannon’s - Karaoke with Mike Johnson Somewhere In Augusta - Big Prize Trivia Surrey Tavern - Tubeday Tuesday Movie Night

June 19 19Wednesday, Live Music Malibu Jack’s - Marilyn Adcock

What’s Tonight?

Armando’s - Karaoke w/ Rockin Rob Chevy’s - Karaoke Cocktails Lounge - Augusta’s Got Talent Cotton Patch - Trivia and Tunes Hotel Aiken - Karaoke w/ Tom Mitchell Laura’s Backyard Tavern - Karaoke w/ David Doane The Loft - Karaoke Midtown Lounge - Karaoke w/ Charles O’Byrne Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Washington Road) - Karaoke The Playground - Krazy Karaoke with Big Troy Polo Tavern - Karaoke w/ Tom Mitchell Somewhere in Augusta - The Comedy Zone w/ D. Cameron and Russell Ehrett Surrey Tavern - Trivia with Christian and Mickey

Upcoming

Savannah River Brass Works - Maude Edenfield Park, North Augusta June 20 Drgn King - Sky City June 20 County Line - Somewhere In Augusta June 20 Bluegrass w/ Oliver West & 39 Express - The Stables at Rose Hill Estate June 21 Will McCranie - Stillwater Taproom June 20 Storm Branch Band - Wild Wing June 20 The Dubber - Augusta Canal Moonlight Music Cruise June 21 Jessta James - Country Club June 21 Bone Chilly - Joe’s Underground June 21 Hedwig and the Angry Inch - Sky City June 21 The Mason Jars - Stillwater Taproom June 21 Ross Coppley - Country Club June 22 Grizzly Harris - Joe’s Underground June 22 Ramblin’ Fevers, Back City Woods - Sky City June 22 The Darnell Boys - Stillwater Taproom June 22 The Henrys - 5 O’Clock Bistro June 23 Piano Jazz - Candlelight Jazz June 23 Glorna Daire Academy of Irish Dance - Hopelands Gardens June 24 John Kolbeck - Joe’s Underground June 26 Eryn Eubanks and the Family Fold - Maude Edenfield Park, North Augusta June 27 Angela Easterling - Augusta Canal Moonlight Music Cruise June 28 Billy Creason & The Dam-Fi-No Band - Country Club June 28 13JUNE2013

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Michael Johnson

mejphoto.photoreflect.com

Nicki Johnson, Matthew Moberg and Jenna Sexton at Metro Coffeehouse and Pub.

SIGHTINGS

Dave and Tami Mann with Amanda and Bryan Huggins at First Friday.

Greta Waldun, Tracy Waldan and Phyllis Goetzman at Firehouse.

SIGHTINGS

Julie Kensey, Joe and Jane Marie Kensey and Blakely McKnight at the Alzheimer’s Association’s Dancing Stars of Augusta at Bell Auditorium.

Wade and Helen Caldwell with Aimee and Jared Gay at the Alzheimer’s Association’s Dancing Stars of Augusta at Bell Auditorium.

SIGHTINGS

Melinda Jones, Abby Honaker and Sunny Bohnnon at First Friday.

30 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

Ceil Polk with winning anglers Mike Whitaker, Ray Fitzgerald and Joey Bruyninckx at PotashCorp’s Fish Back Tournament at Wildwood Park.

Scotty and Jessica Boyd, Crystal Kelley and Clay Blanton at the Alzheimer’s Association’s Dancing Stars of Augusta at Bell Auditorium.

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Edmond Thompson, Doug Barron, Chase Powell and John McKinnon at PotashCorp’s Fish Back Tournament at Wildwood Park.

13JUNE2013

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THE

BOX TOPS

The criminals in “The Purge” kill the competition.

EIGHT

RANK

TITLES

WEEKEND GROSS

TOTAL GROSS

WEEK #

LAST WEEK

THE PURGE

$34,058,360

FAST & FURIOUS 6

$19,626,885

$202,812,580

NOW YOU SEE ME

$19,040,890

$60,914,914

THE INTERNSHIP

$17,325,307

EPIC

$11,876,003

$83,930,559

“The Purge”

SAMEIFLING

A bad idea that Americans seem to love In the annals of terrible American ideas — the War on Drugs, the sequester, chocolate bubble gum, “Who Wants to Marry a Multi-Millionaire?” — the worst may be the titular event of “The Purge.” Nine years from now, U.S. unemployment and crime are at absurd lows, with the wee little catch that for one night a year, all violent crime is totally legal and even celebrated as patriotic. Twelve hours of murder sprees and violent beatings is all it takes, apparently, for people to “release the beast” and then simmer down for the other 364.5 days a year. It’s like shaking your sillies out, except with machetes and shotguns. “The Purge” plops us into the home of the Sandins on the big night. The dad (Ethan Hawke) is a home security salesman who actively supports the Purge but does not himself partake. Business has boomed, making him rich enough to live in a mini-mansion nestled on a quiet suburban cul-de-somewhere. The mom (a black-bobbed Lena Headey, still recognizable as Cersei from “Game of Thrones”) cooks dinner and then drinks a glass of wine. The daughter (Adelaide Kane) has a hunky boyfriend and a short plaid skirt. The son (Max Burkholder) likes tinkering with a remotecontrolled car with a camera. They seem like nice folks, if perhaps annoyingly flush. A neighbor says as much: All the security systems on the block helped finance for the new addition on the family’s house, and don’t you know

that gets folks chirping with the Purge coming on? The implications of the Purge, as it’s presented, are slathered in violence and in class critique, and for the first 20 or 30 minutes, a fun clump of dread coagulates in your belly. Commentators in the movie point out, ever so sensibly, that the effects of his annual blood-orgy fall disproportionately on the poor, who can’t afford the fancy locks and bars and moats and portcullises and whatnot that the one percent deploy to repel the rabble. And then you think about how America actually works right now, and who does face violence, and about who could even push wanton massacre through Congress — what did those committee hearings sound like, anyway? — but oh, wait, more than two-thirds of the House actually did vote to authorize force in Iraq, speaking of bad ideas, so who knows, maybe America is capable of anything, and we should all wait till our concealed carries come through before braving such possible battle zones as barbecues and Sunday school and trick-or-treating. Meanwhile, back in the actual movie, the promise of “The Purge” evaporates as it becomes clear that director/writer James DeMonaco has taken a ol’ big bite off of ’muricah and neglected to chew. In the hour after the Purge begins, at least one incredibly stupid

(and ultimately unexplained) thing happens, followed by a more plausible event when a man outside (Edwin Hodge, billed in the credits as “bloody stranger”) calls out for help. Some highly unpleasant strangers, led by the smug elevated cheekbones of Rhys Wakefield, show up outside and insist that they’re coming inside. Then: cat-and-mouse, a single ethical dilemma to hang the entire story on, cat-and-mouse, bang-bangaxe-stab-bang-bang, etc. It’s several shades too dopey to be taken seriously, too tendentious to let you revel in its campiness. Crazy thing is, this movie cost a $3 million pittance to make and hauled in $34 million over its first weekend, tops in the country. It was a rare summer coup by a small-budget pic. It stomped “The Internship.” America has spoken, and it prefers a dystopian eatthe-rich fantasy over a comedy about finding work. ’Cause who these days believes the latter?

JUNE 14 ACTION

“Man of Steel,” rated PG-13, starring Henry Cavill, Amy Adams, Michael Shannon, Russell Crowe, Diane Lane, Kevin Costner. The long, long, looonnnnnggggg awaited reboot of the Superman franchise finally arrives. And from the media bombardment we’ve been subjected to, it looks like a lot is riding on this movie, which leaves us with one question: Why Russell Crowe as Jor-El? As a friend recently said, speaking for us all, we are not comfortable with that casting decision. 32 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

COMEDY

“This Is the End,” rated R, starring James Franco, Seth Rogen, Paul Rudd, Jonah Hill, Danny McBride, Craig Robinson, Michael Cera, Emma Watson, Mindy Kaling, Rihanna, Channing Tatum. Celebrities playing themselves, facing the apocalypse at a party at James Franco’s house? The jokes almost write themselves. Almost…

13JUNE2013

WHINE

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WHINELINE@THEMETROSPIRIT.COM

LINE up

It’s the first Triple Crown win since 1990 for Aiken’s Dogwood Stable, as Palace Malice wins last Saturday’s Belmont Stakes.

Have something you want to get off your chest? Send your whines to whineline@themetrospirit. com. If you do so by noon on Friday, you might just see it in the next Thursday’s issue. Oh, and whines may be edited for content but will pretty much be printed exactly as you type them.

down

At 13-1 odds, we only wish we had placed a bet.

There needs to be a support for the victims of infidelity in Augusta, GA. Never before have I seen so much infidelity going on. I know that it happens but the single young women, for the most part have no regard for married women. There are so many women with different baby daddy’s that do not know what it is to be a real relationship. It is disgusting!!! Many of them are in over yourself and let’s hope justice can be served in this very housing or still living at home having children from this guy and important upcoming trial. Peace... that one. What is up with the ugly, offensive cartoon on pg 19??? I’m just thumbing through - looking for Jenny is Wright - when I see this so not funny trash. Please do not use this cartoonist any more I was going to order tickets to see Earth, Wind, and Fire, but since the lovely James Brown Arena now charges $4 to hold tickets at will call or $3.25 to print them from home (in addition to the outrageous $8.50 convenience fee and $3 facility fee), I’m not purchasing them on principle. Sure, if I can afford at $50 ticket I can afford the fees, but this is robbery. To the person was has already exonerated Zinnerman for pursuing and murdering and unarmed teenager, Trayvon Martin, you are a “dyed in the wool” bigot and you really should be ashamed of yourself. You are part of the reason this city and this country can not move forward because you carry deep seeded hatred for anyone who doesn’t look, act or think like you. Get

34 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

Since our illustrious Supreme Court in ALL it’s wisdom can allow such nonsense as mandatory DNA withdrawal for “serious crimes” for everyone then why in the Bajeesus hasn’t someone fought “all the way to the supreme court” the fact that your government has been lying for eons about the “dangers of Cannibis” and the fact that not a single person has EVER overdosed on consumption of it!!!! Can’t say that about aspirin, now can we?

THUMBS time Augusta had a real leader in the mayor’s office. HBA is just more of the same. I think the US should Outlaw Tobacco Smoking! Those Tobacco Companies should then be Allowed /Encouraged to Replace their Tobacco Crops with Sugar Cane AND Marijuana! This would not only help America Gain Energy Independence! Alcohol for Auto Fuel! BUT! “Second Hand Smoke” would be BENEFICIAL to those Forced to Inhale It! I Know! This would Diversely Effect the Liquor Industry! Briefly Albeit, they too would Enter the Fuel Production Industry! Since Alcohol Burns More Cleanly, Air Pollution would Also Decline! I Knew I should’ve Patented this!

Great Article By Robert Long on Paul Broun in Washington. It would be good to have more content from Washington on items of local interest. Helen Blocker-Adams for mayor? Puh leeze! Does anyone know just what exactly it is she does? It seems like she thinks she is Augusta’s version of Oprah. But even Oprah has more substance and depth. After 8 years of “duck and cover” Deke, it’s about

13JUNE2013