Metro Spirit 07.03.2003

METRO SPIRIT July 3-9 Vol. 14 No. 48

Augusta’s Independent Voice

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Contents DUI Metro Spirit

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3 - 9

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F R E E

W E E K LY

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M E T R O S P I R I T. C O M

ON THE COVER

Absinthe By Brian Neill ....................................16

Free Phone Call

Tales of a Telemarketer By Brian Neill ..................................................................14 Opinion

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FEATURES

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Cover Design: Stephanie Bell Cover Photo: Brian Neill

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THE CATHOLIC CHURCH OF THE MOST HOLY TRINITY Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults

Whine Line ......................................................................4 Words ...............................................................................4 This Modern World .........................................................4 Thumbs Up/Thumbs Down ............................................6 Suburban Torture ............................................................7 Austin Rhodes .................................................................8 Insider ............................................................................10

• Are you looking for a new direction in your life?

• Would you like to have a deeper relationship with Jesus Christ, in the theology and teaching of the Catholic Church?

• Do you feel empty, wounded, or rest less in your spiritual life?

Metro Beat

• Are you interested in becoming a Catholic Christian?

• Have you never been fully initiated into the Catholic faith through the Sacrament of Confirmation?

• Are you a lukewarm Catholic who would like to be refreshed in Catholic truths?

Civic Center Considers Hiring Past Leadership .........11

Arts

A Man and His Theatre ................................................28 Athens Historical and Art Exhibit Provides Window to Another Time ................................................................30

Events

8 Days a Week .............................................................22

Cinema: Review “T3” Filled With the Tired Stuff of Summer Blockbusters ...................34

Cinema

Movie Listings .............................................................31 Review: “28 Days Later” ............................................33 Review: “Terminator 3” ...............................................34 Movie Clock ..................................................................34

Music Mud-Wrestling Participants Get Down and Dirty ........21 Three Dynamic Bands Rock Crossroads .....................35 Music by Turner ..............................................................36 The Boo Hoo Ramblers Bring Heartbreak Songs to Augusta .......................................................................37 Music Minis ....................................................................38 Night Life .........................................................................39

Stuff News of the Weird ........................................................42 Brezsny's Free Will Astrology ......................................43 New York Times Crossword Puzzle ............................43 Amy Alkon: The Advice Goddess ................................44 Date Maker ...................................................................45 Classifieds .....................................................................47

EDITOR & PUBLISHER David Vantrease ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Rhonda Jones STAFF WRITERS Stacey Eidson, Brian Neill ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER Joe White ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Kriste Lindler, Kristen Chandler PRODUCTION MANAGER Joe Smith GR APHIC ARTISTS Stephanie Bell, Natalie Holle ASSISTANT TO THE PUBLISHER Meli Gurley ACCOUNTING MANAGER/CLASSIFIEDS Sharon King ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT ASSISTANT Lisa Jordan CIRCULATION DIRECTOR Meli Gurley SENIOR MUSIC CONTRIBUTOR Ed Turner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Chuck Shepherd, Rob Brezsny, Austin Rhodes, Amy Alkon, Rachel Deahl,David Elliot t CARTOONISTS Tom Tomorrow, Julie Larson

METRO SPIRIT is a free newspaper published weekly on Thursday, 52 weeks of the year. Editorial coverage includes ar ts, local issues, news, enter tainment, people, places and events. In our paper appear views from across the political and social spectrum. The views do not necessarily represent the views of the publishers. Visit us at www.metrospirit.com. Copyright © The Metropolitan Spirit Inc. Reproduction or use without permission is prohibited.

Phone: (706) 738-1142 Fax: (706) 733-6663 E-mail: spirit@metrospirit.com Letters to the Editor: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, Ga. 30914-3809

If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, the R.C.I.A. process may be just what you are looking for.

The R.C.I.A. (Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults) is a journey of the faith that offers you a challenge for a vibrant new spirituality in your life.

The R.C.I.A. is about conversion and understanding the doctrines and the theology of the Catholic Church.

It is a growing awareness of what Catholic’s believe and profess.

It is an experience that calls for change; change that is rooted in the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

The R.C.I.A. is an opportunity to experience spirituality as you may have never experienced it before by sharing in the teachings and traditions of the Catholic Church.

The R.C.I.A. process will help you to understand Catholic liturgy and worship and the Sacraments of the Church.

For more information: Director of R.C.I.A. Church of the Most Holy Trinity P.O. Box 2446 Augusta, GA 30903 or email: kmp_mht@bellsouth.net

706.722.4944

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Whine Line T

his is to the person who wrote in about the radio station 92.7 FM being much better about having variety than 93.9 FM and some of the other stations. I just want to say that I agree with you 100 percent! We play 92.7 where I work and they definitely have the best and widest variety of songs from the ‘50s to today! It is rare you hear the same song twice in one week, and mostly all the songs they play are really good. I get so sick of these other stations that play the same boring songs over and over again. Sometimes I think some of these other radio stations only have 10 CDs in the whole radio station because that is all they ever play.

I’m glad 92.7 knows that having good variety is the key to having a good radio station. Keep up the good work 92.7!

Last week, a whiner said, “We attacked an innocent country because of weapons of mass destruction.” Awww, boo hoo.

You’ve been reading too many Tom Tomorrow cartoons. We’ll find the WMD and if we don’t, few people will care. In the meantime, we’ve found torture centers, horror camps and dozens of mass graves. Innocent Iraq? Not in my book and, for the first time, Iraqis have been able to freely practice their religious beliefs. Americans are the good guys.

from Augusta are coming to you. This fall the county will offer to take over collection of your fire tax. If you really believe that the tax and the SPLOST funds will go to improve fire service, I have a bridge in New York I would like to sell you. Yep, eight parks to build, other shortages to cover you will see a county fire service which rivals most third world countries.

The people who own and run Richmond Summit are, in my opinion, no better than slumlords. They don’t care what goes on in the building as they get their monthly rental checks from the government. Perhaps government leaders should step in and shut down the cash flow until security is implemented.

I figure the Democrats will be the first party to endorse legalizing marijuana, and as a centrist, this is the only way I could get high on party politics.

So the Democrats are recruiting Vince Dooley to run for Senate. The Democrats should realize that name recognition alone with no political background wouldn’t be enough. Look at how Mrs. Dooley (who ran as Mrs. Dooley) got clobbered by an unknown as a Republican. Guess the Democrats are hard up for anybody to run.

To the whiner defending the Richmond Summit: You should know your history because downtown business was thriving before the Summit and will thrive again with things like the Summit gone.

“President Hillary Rodham Clinton!”

Hah! Never happen! One word: Baggage.

Hillary has more baggage and flaws than a dozen Tonya Hardings.

Well, well, Columbia County Republicans. If you happened to read Barry Paschal’s editorial Sunday, you will notice that your beloved Columbia County (Motto: Run by people with (R) after their names) is sucking wind for a tax base. And for those of you in the nice Westlake and Jones Creek areas, the taxes you ran from when you moved

In retort to the bashing, not to be confused with “reviewing,” of Ed Turner in last week’s Whine Line, I also felt compelled to write. Whoever submitted this whine obviously knows little to nothing regarding Mr. Turner’s expertise in music, nor the fact that he chose to DJ only once per month despite the overwhelming requests from years of loyal

Words "I can see that my full name will be Maynard Jackson First Black Mayor of Atlanta, Georgia."

— former Atlanta Mayor Maynard Jackson, as quoted by The Atlanta JournalConstitution, years after leaving public office. Jackson was concerned the label would overshadow all his accomplishments as mayor. Maynard Jackson: 1938-2003

"If you see any good I did as governor, give the credit for that to God and blame whatever else you find on Lester."

— Former Georgia Gov. Lester Maddox once told The Atlanta Journal-Constitution.

Lester Maddox: 1915-2003

"She walks well, she looks good. Let’s see how she kisses."

— Former South Carolina Sen. Strom Thurmond reportedly said in 1947, after crowning Miss South Carolina when he was governor. Strom Thurmond: 1902-2003

listeners. Ed Turner uses his weekly column to review music, which does not imply that he merely spouts random opinion. He, in fact, actually takes the time to listen to every lyric, note and chord in every song that he reviews ... not surf the net to plagiarize some other reviewer’s half-witted comments!

It is really not a matter of when we will find the weapons of mass destruction, it’s now a matter of when the administration will release the information — during the primary or during the general election.

It’s interesting that in your article about the controversy at First Baptist Church, not once were issues of faith discussed. It was all about money, prestige and power.

Representing the proposed performing art center, Lowell Greenbaum just took a trip to Columbus at the taxpayer’s expense and spent the whole day lobbying the SPLOST advisory panel. Why continued on page 6

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Attention all ugly people driving convertibles (you know who you are). Please sell them. We don’t want to look at you.

Someone please answer this question. If it’s illegal to buy or sell fireworks in the state of Georgia and it’s illegal to even fire them off, how do these fireworks displays at Patriot’s Park and Riverwalk go on?

I want to challenge people in this state: Get a copy of the laws for the state of Georgia (you can find these online if you don’t want to travel to the library). Read

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continued from page 4 wasn’t the library or any other group who is being considered for funds invited? And who invited Greenbaum?

The other groups were bound by a limited time slot to present their case to the panel and Greenbaum’s performing arts center gets a full day and undivided attention? Something is very wrong with this picture.

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Those who object to the homosexual lifestyle on moral or other grounds have every right to do so. But that doesn't mean they should have the right to impose their beliefs and bedroom restrictions on others. Luckily, the U.S. Supreme Court felt the same way, striking down a Texas law forbidding homosexual sodomy.

The ruling is a victory for personal freedom and a blow to government intrusion, which should stop outside the bedroom door.

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New information in the Tri-State Crematory case presents an even grimmer picture of what went on at the North Georgia facility, where hundreds of decomposing, uncremated bodies were found last year. Georgia's chief medical examiner said that one storage building had bodies "spilling out" of it, according to his deposition, the contents of which were reported by The Atlanta Journal-Constitution. According to the article, investigators also found a pit containing 23 bodies which were so badly decomposed as to make identification nearly impossible.

"Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle" topped the box office this past weekend. It's confirmed: We're a nation of idiots.

some of the laws still on the books since the 1800s, especially the ones pertaining to various sex acts in the privacy of your own home. You will die laughing! Come on Georgia lawmakers: Review all these laws and repeal the really stupid ones. If you need help, ask any constituent to point out the ones that need to be removed.

Chris Naylor is a pox on First Friday ... can someone please put him in the car and drop him off somewhere far away ... somewhere he’ll do less damage ... what has Main street Augusta done for you lately?

I wanted to thank the Golf and Gardens for caring enough about their members (me and my family included) that they made a difficult decision to cancel their fireworks viewing, especially after being notified just two weeks before the 4th that the city had moved the fireworks to 5th Street. The Gardens made a tough decision so that we would have time to find an alternate place to see the fireworks, although today, when I made 10 calls to the city events office, no one was there to tell me where we could locate and view the fireworks at 5th Street!

So we’ll be taking our family and guests to Patriots Park.

Is there any way that everybody on the Civic Center board can be removed and replaced with new people? It’s obvious that every single one of them is incapable of working together and doing the right thing for our community. This is embarrassing!

Boy, is Columbia County Commissioner Tom Mercer a dunce or what? When he commented about the need for a transportation study, he made two grammatical errors. First, he ended a sentence with “at,” as in “That’s where we have the most wrecks at.” Secondly, he used an adjective in place of an adverb, as in “Somebody’s going to get hurt bad there.”

Maybe the county should enroll him in Effective Speaking I or Remedial English I. Either way, he is an embarrassment!.

This is a rant to Chris Naylor for not having the decency to let anyone know that the 4th of July 10th Street music show was cancelled. A lot of people put a lot of hard work into that show!

Who is Chris Naylor and how did he become responsible for our beautiful struggling downtown? Was he selfappointed? I’m not sure anyone really knows. Instead of relying on a failing figurehead, all of those who really have their hearts and souls in this town, and not just their pocketbooks, should put their ideas together and fight the power.

Look at any city in the world that is successful. It’s known because of two very important things: Commerce and the arts.

Think about it Augusta. It’s your city, your responsibility and your future.

With the exceptions of Jeanette Brouillard and Shondell Hughes, where are the Hotties?

To the “Lurch” guy: I have been a punk rock/metal fan for years now. I really

don’t appreciate you saying that no one listens to punk. Augusta has two punk rock venues. Punk has made a comeback.

I enjoy the new Metallica for your information. So, obviously you have no idea what you were talking about.

Yes, Bonnie may have inherited her businesses and sat on all her abandoned buildings waiting on the prices to go up creating a slum-like effect. Yes, she may oppose all the business owners downtown on everything who were not in business in the 60s, etc. But if it weren’t for her, you wouldn’t be able to buy a lime green, polyester, three-piece suit with matching shoes anywhere in town.

I wanna tell Chris Naylor, this is the reason why we don’t have any good bands come to Augusta, because of cancellations. If you’re gonna do something, do it, don’t cancel it!

Someone stole the stop sign at the corner of Goshen Lake Dr. and Burning Tree Dr. about three weeks ago and it’s still missing. You would think in three weeks time that one of the lazy deadbeats from Richmond County would come to the intersection and notice it. Either that or they are too stupid or too lazy to care!

Those who do not like to tip and would rather have the restaurant pay their hired help more should understand one fundamental fact about running a business. If costs go up, the price of their product or

service goes up. In the case of restaurants, if they pay their food servers more, they would have to increase the price for their food. And it would increase by more than the customary tip of 15 percent …

So you get your pic in the paper for the Hottie Hunt. Then you spend your interview talking about driving around topless, calling your mother to bring you your fake ID and sneaking into nightclubs underage. I’m sure your moms were thrilled to have that published for all of Augusta to see!

Not so much a whine but a very big thank you to the people who nominated Jody Smith for the Hottie Hunt. I started seeing him around two weeks ago in a place I frequent and apparently so does he but had no idea of his name or anything. This article was extremely fortuitous and now I can gaze knowledgeably.

Excellent feature for the paper. Please do another one soon!

I would like to thank Bob Young for keeping his mug out of the papers the past six months. It seemed like you couldn’t escape his enormous head for a couple of years there. Now if we could do the same with those First Friday folks.

— Call our Whine Line at 510-2051 and leave your comments. We won’t use your name. Fax your whines by dialing (706) 733-6663 or e-mail your whines to whine@metrospirit.com.

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Mud wrestling is back, but now it’s more like potting soil wrestling.

What’s up with that?

Find out on p. 21.

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Opinion: Austin Rhodes

M E T R O S P I R I T

YDC Thugs (Employees) Deserve None of the Courtesy the State Is Giving Them

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od bless the Augusta State Legislative Delegation. This is the group that has to sit politely while the displaced employees of Augusta’s Youth Development Center bitch and moan about being laid off, while most of them are damn lucky they haven’t been carted off to the pokey.

To sum up: Augusta’s YDC, the regional juvenile justice facility, has been labeled by investigators as one of the most dangerous and corrupt institutions the state has ever seen. A laundry list released by the Georgia Bureau of Investigations implies that Augusta’s YDC was doing its best to keep up with the worst adult prisons you can imagine in the way of illegal sexual activity (between inmates and guards, inmates and inmates, and very likely any slowmoving animals on the premises), physical torture and beatings, illegal drug traffic, bribery and extortion.

It was what you might expect if the HBO prison series “Oz” had been produced by Nickelodeon.

When officials with the Georgia Department of Juvenile Justice learned the depth and gravity of the situation, they had little choice but to make wholesale changes posthaste.

A private company with a history of local political contributions that would make the tobacco lobby proud (Unique Solutions) was brought in to address the crisis. While the political and financial ramifications of that move are enough to fill this newspaper, the bottom line is the company was going to try to keep the facility safe and secure with as many of the existing state employees as possible.

That was until the “union” mentality took over. Ticked off that their jobs were at risk, and that the state had the audacity to take over “their” facility, many of the officers assigned to protect (and protect us from) the inmates decided to pull a “blue flu” campaign worthy of Jimmy Hoffa.

It didn’t work.

Out of control absenteeism by workers may work in a Northern state, or in a union shop, but this is the South, and the union mentality in Georgia’s public safety system goes about as far as a fat nerd in a sorority house.

State bigwigs watching the mess from afar had had enough, and they canned the lot of them. Good blankity-blank riddance!

I’m gonna say here what all the folks in the know have been saying behind the scenes from the beginning: There were three types of employees working directly with the troubled youth at Augusta’s YDC:

1. The employees who were directly conducting the illegal activities.

2. The employees who knew what was going on and did nothing to stop the illegal activities.

3. The employees who were too cottonpicking stupid to know what was going on right in front of their eyes.

All three groups should have been kicked out day one. Those in the first two groups should be somewhere comparing bright orange jump suits.

The fact that folks like state representatives Quincy Murphy and Henry Howard are so quick to defend the employees and attack the state’s emergency takeover, is what has smart folks puzzled. I am all for due process and looking out for the little guy, but the horrific circumstances at Augusta’s YDC warranted every single move made by the honchos.

Even if you give the employees the benefit of the doubt on the criminal charges (which is playing with very serious fire), the attitude and ignorance shown by the mass absenteeism is enough to terminate every one of them.

Specific details on the charges and the culture of depravity and malfeasance that existed at the facility are due shortly.

When those details hit, have the barf bags ready. It is just that bad.

Austin’s Take on the Judges It is with a big smile on my face that I watch the left-wing legal beagles in this town boil over the fact that a real Republican is going to get the nod to be our next superior court judge. I am going to go out on a limb and predict that the final short list will include Mike Annis, Jim Wall and Clay Stebbins. (Thumbs up to the Metro Spirit Insider last week on the Stebbins scoop!)

And while he may make the short list, unless Jim Wall can prove that he has the home phone numbers of the immediate last two chairmen of the Republican Parties of Richmond and Columbia County in his wallet, his chances are slim.

Bob Gardner and Alvin Starks are good friends of mine. Too bad Jim Wall didn’t get to know them a heck of a lot better.

The Dems have controlled state politics since Moses was in grade school. Time for real conservatives and real Republicans to enjoy their power.

— The views expressed in this column are the views of the writer and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher. The archived Austin Rhodes columns can now be seen at www.wgac.com.

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HOME coming What do you like best about arriving home from a long trip?

(A) Those last few minutes of happy anticipation before you pull into the driveway?

(B) Family hugs?

(C) Pet pats?

(D) Knowing that your own bed and pillow are waiting?

Answer – All of the above. Because we’re only about 30 minutes away when you fly home to AGS.

Take life easier. Fly there. Fly home.

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Paving the Way for the Return of Reggie Williams?

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race yourself! The chaos at the Augusta-Richmond County Civic Center may be just beginning.

Insiders close to the civic center authority report that all the brouhaha may be playing into the hands of authority members who want to bring back Reggie Williams to manage the civic center— again. Ridiculous, you say? Stranger things have happened.

Now that the authority has halted all contract negotiations with Global Spectrum to manage the civic center, Ziva Bruckner has resigned as the authority’s attorney, Bernard Harper has resigned as authority chairman, and warring factions are feuding like never before, authority member Joe Scott is floating the idea of bringing back Williams.

Williams was fired as manager of the civic center in May 2002. After months of discontent, a complaint by the United Methodist Church regarding their annual convention held at the building was the final straw. In a racially divided 6-4 vote, Williams was ousted. Supporters of Williams have been irritated ever since.

Scott is testing the waters to see if he has the votes to bring back Williams.

Williams sued the authority for a year’s salary after his dismissal. The case is pending. As reported in Austin Rhodes’ column last week, Scott appeared with Williams at a recent court proceeding where Williams requested Judge Albert Pickett to order binding arbitration in the dispute. The request was denied.

This week the management search committee recommended former civic center manager Larry Rogers for consideration as the new manager of the building. Rogers will be considered at the next scheduled meeting of the full authority. His chances are questionable if the Williams supporters on the authority have their way. More later.

Reggie Williams Meet the New Judge The deadline for application for the judge position created by the resignation of Superior Court Judge Lyn Allgood was June 30. The following names were submitted to the Judicial Nomination Commission for consideration, according to the chairman of the commission, Mike Bowers: Ben Allen, Mike Annis, Sherry Barnes, Danny Craig, Barry Fleming, Maureen Floyd, Ben Jackson, Sheryl Jolly, Laurel Landon, Lee Little, Walter Meetze, Wade Padgett, James Purcell, Bill Sams, Jay Sawilowsky, Charles Stebbins III, James Thompson, Tommy Tucker, Leonard Tuggle Jr., and Jim Wall.

The commission will cull the list to not more than five names and submit the nominees to Governor Sonny Perdue, who will make the appointment. Stay tuned.

—The views expressed in this column are the views of The Insider and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

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MetroBeat Civic Center Considers Hiring Past Leadership

M

embers of the AugustaRichmond County Coliseum Authority must be the only people in America that haven’t heard the saying, “Those who do not learn from the mistakes of the past are doomed to repeat them.”

On July 1, members of the authority’s management search committee unanimously voted to recommend to the full board the hiring of former civic center general manager Larry Rogers.

Ironically, Rogers may not be the former general manager that some members of the board are looking to rehire.

As rumors have begun circulating this week of the possible return of Reggie Williams, the former civic center manager who was fired last year following several controversial problems during the 2002 North Georgia United Methodists Conference, the search committee decided Rogers was the best candidate currently on the table for consideration.

Rogers, who was fired by a previous board in 1993, ran Augusta’s civic center for 13 years starting in 1980.

Although members of the search committee acknowledged they did not know why Rogers was terminated in 1993, many believed he was their best option.

“We had other applications, but there is nobody in the applications that outshines Larry, I can tell you that,” said Authority Chairman Billy Holden. “This man ran the building for 13 years. He’s been in the business for 25 years. In my opinion, there is nobody else that comes close.”

Since he left Augusta’s civic center in 1993, Rogers has run a number of other facilities in surrounding areas such as

Statesville, N.C., and Port St. Lucie, Fla., but most recently he founded a moving company called Five Star Moving, Inc. here in Augusta.

Authority member Annie Rogers, who is no relation to Larry Rogers, said her major concern was recommending a man to the board without knowing the reasoning behind his prior termination.

“I have to say that I have a couple of concerns,” Annie Rogers said. “Not having served on the board when Larry Rogers was here before, I would like to know the circumstances under which he was no longer manager.”

Authority member Wayne Frazier, who served as chairman of the search committee, said that he tried to find out as much as he could about Larry Rogers’ past before considering him for the position.

“I know there is some controversy surrounding Mr. Rogers, based on, he was the manager and left, and why would we consider him to come back,” Frazier said. “And I guess there are some folks that probably don’t agree with him applying, but I did some research and I talked to some people and I have not come up with anything negative about his performance at this building.”

But Frazier added he has yet to meet the candidate in person.

“Larry Rogers could come hit me upside my head right now and I couldn’t identify him. I’ve never seen him a day in my life. I don’t know him,” Frazier said.

“However, I have talked to people who were on the board when he was here and I talked to people that worked under him while he was here. And based on that, I

M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 3

By Stacey Eidson

haven’t received any negative information.

“Now, why he left or why he was relieved or moved on or whatever, I don’t know what the circumstances were surrounding that.”

Holden said he was not on the authority when Larry Rogers managed the civic center; however, he explained that it was

2 0 0 3

his understanding that the board in 1993 simply felt it was time for a change.

“I know Larry and I’ve talked to a lot of former (authority) members and I think the authority was just trying to do better,” Holden said. “They had losses and they were trying to improve the bottom line.

So, basically, what I’m trying to say is, continued on page 12

“We had other applications, but there is nobody in the applications that outshines Larry (Rogers), I can tell you that.”

— Authority Chairman Billy Holden

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continued from page 11 they were trying to do better financially.

But the truth is known: We didn’t do any better.”

Holden said the former authority soon discovered that Larry Rogers financially managed the facility as successfully as any of the managers that followed him.

“Nobody has done as good as him,” Holden said. “But there has been a lot of them that has done worse than him, as far as the bottom line.”

Authority member Joe Scott, who did serve on the board when it fired Larry Rogers in 1993, told the committee he could not remember the circumstances behind Rogers’ termination.

Frazier told the committee the main reason he supported recommending Larry Rogers to the board was because he, by far, had the most experience of all the potential candidates.

“The one thing that I guess I was looking at with this Rogers fellow is, he’s had dealings with this building, these people and this whole situation,” Frazier said. “And he has offered to do this job cheaper than all of the others. I think his price was $60,000 a year with a $5,000 car allowance.”

Holden said he believed Larry Rogers was asking for such a low salary because he wanted to prove to the authority that he could do the job.

“Of course, he expects to get a raise if he does a good job and I’m sure we’ll do it, but it was goodwill on his part,” Holden said. “He obviously wants to show that his heart is in the right place.”

Annie Rogers was still uncomfortable with nominating someone without clearly understanding the authority’s feelings about him and his former termination.

“My concern is, what is the feeling of the entire authority?” Annie Rogers asked. “Is this guy going to be accepted?

I don’t want to make a motion for someone that this full authority is not going to accept because if we go forth to the board with this recommendation that we hire him and he’s not accepted, we are right back where we started from.

“And I’m not absolutely certain, from what I’ve heard, that he’s going to be accepted.”

Holden told Annie Rogers that it is impossible for anyone to predict what the board will ultimately do. “(Former Augusta Mayor) Larry Sconyers one time said, ‘Votes change from the back of the room to the front of the room,’” Holden said, chuckling. “But I really believe he’s got the support and I think he would do a good job.”

Authority members Millard Cox, Annie Rogers and Frazier all agreed to present Larry Rogers as their recommendation to the board.

Frazier told the committee members that they should feel comfortable with their recommendation.

“I don’t want to look like a fool and do something knowing that we have a shady character in our midst,” Frazier said.

“So, I did a little research. And as far as I’m concerned, all the negative comments and allegations against him were hearsay.”

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Tales of a

Telemarketer H

ow many times during the past week — or the past 24 hours, for that matter — has your phone rung and a crafty person on the other end called you by your first name and feigned some reunited friendship, only to proceed to try and sell you some credit card or dream vacation?

John, a local man, knows the drill all too well.

In fact, he may have been the one calling you.

John has worked the past couple of years as a telemarketer for both FutureCall and a local charity.

He asked that his real name not be used because of confidentiality agreements he signed at his current and former places of employment.

There’s also another reason: He’s embarrassed.

For John, getting into the telemarketing biz was not a conscientious decision based on a desire to blaze the trails of phone salesmanship or win the Cadillac, like in “Glengarry Glen Ross.”

In fact, John says, “It was the bottom of the barrel for me.”

“I have a degree in a technical field and I’ve been laid off four times,” John continued. “This is not a conducive town for a job in the technical field, just in general.”

He believes the prospects for the person

without a degree of any sort — a category he says many of his fellow telemarketers fall into — are even more dismal.

“If you give the person an option where all they have is a GED or maybe not even that, of working in McDonald’s flipping burgers in a dirty, greasy, hot environment with a high stress factor — give the person the option of making minimum wage doing that,” John said, “or (the option of) getting $8 an hour plus commission, starting pay, benefits, all that stuff, to sit in an office with very low stress ... you know, working at a desk in a place where people are wearing ties, which one are you going to choose?”

Telemarketers have been a pariah on the nation’s fiber-optic highways, intruding in our lives, interrupting our dinners or the rare, quiet moment, and failing to understand the three simple words: “I’m not interested.”

But a recently passed measure establishing a federal do-not-call list, may make the typical telemarketer’s job a lot lonelier.

The measure, which went into effect in June, allows people to register by phone or via the Internet to block unwanted solicitation calls to their homes.

Telemarketing firms that violate the don’t-call list could be fined up to $11,000 per call.

On June 27, the first day the National Do Not Call Registry implemented by

the Federal Trade Commission was up and running, as many as 1,000 registrants per second were reportedly signing up to bar frustrating telemarketing calls from their homes.

The FTC and the Federal Communications Commission will begin enforcing the don’t-call registry on Oct. 1, for consumers who’ve registered by Aug. 31.

Those who register after Aug. 31 will begin seeing a decline in telemarketing calls within three months of placing their phone number on the list.

People registering by phone must call from the phone number to which they intend to block calls. For instance, consumers can’t phone from work to block calls to their home telephone, or vice-versa.

Consumers who sign up on the don’tcall list are protected for a period of five years, after which they must re-register.

The FTC says that people who place their phone number on the don’t-call list can expect to stop “most, but not all” telemarketing calls.

Though it’s obviously easy to hate telemarketers, John says he thinks few people realize what it’s like to be on the other end of the conversation.

He said it helps for a telemarketer to have a good sense of humor. But above all, John said, he or she must have thick skin.

John said his rejections have run the

gamut from people playing practical jokes on him or cussing him out, to merely hanging up on him.

Through it all, John had to keep his cool and think about that paycheck.

“When I was working for FutureCall, I didn’t care whether BellSouth (one of FutureCall’s marketing clients) made money or not,” John says. “And so as a result, my commission wasn’t that high, but I made enough sales that they left me alone.

“So, if someone hung up on me, I really didn’t care. To me, I’m on their side. I understand. I don’t want to be doing this. I don’t want to be having to call these people.”

Most of the time, John says, telemarketers are merely reciting, over and over again, a sales pitch that has been charted out for them on a computer screen and rehearsed.

“There’s a concept in sales that when a person says ‘no’ they obviously haven’t heard enough about the product,” John said. “We’re told that we have to assume the sale, that regardless of what the person says, they can say flat out, ‘No, I’m not interested,’ you’re supposed to say, ‘I understand that,’ and then you go into what’s called a rebuttal. If you (a potential customer) give a response like, ‘I can’t afford it,’ then they have a rebuttal written already for you: ‘Well, I understand that sir. Finances can be tight,

By Brian Neill

but this allows you to do this, and this and this, so with that in mind, let’s get you started.’”

Telemarketers also are trained in the practice called “mirroring,” which amounts to imitating a potential customer’s personality and characteristics, John says.

“Say you answer the phone: ‘H-e-llo, ho-w-ya do-in,’ talking really slow, I would talk really slow,” John said. “If you had a Southern accent, I would kind of speak with a Southern accent. And if you sound like an old person, I would sound like an old person. And you mirror to get them comfortable with you, because people are most comfortable talking to people who are like them.”

If this makes the telemarketing business sound like an exacting science, there’s a good reason for it.

The Direct Marketing Association, an industry group that represents telemarketers and direct-mailers, said $660 billion in sales were made over the telephone in 2001.

Roughly 6 million people in the nation were employed in jobs relating to telemarketing, the DMA reports.

“And you’d be surprised with how many people are OK with telemarketers,” John said. “That’s the thing. They wouldn’t do it if people didn’t respond to it. If no one bought the products, then they wouldn’t advertise that way.”

Still, not everyone wants to be exposed to a barrage of unsolicited calls.

That explains the popularity of devices like the Telezapper, which cancel out incoming calls from telemarketing firms.

However, industry watchers suggest

telemarketing firms will soon find their way around such devices.

Most agree, the federal don’t-call list is definitely a step in the right direction toward clamping down on unsolicited calls.

“Unwanted telemarketing calls are intrusive, they are annoying, and they’re all too common,” President George W. Bush was quoted by Cox News Service as saying the day the FTC don’t-call registry was set up. “When Americans are sitting down to dinner or a parent is reading to his or her child, the last thing they need is a call from a stranger with a sales pitch.”

As the legislation was crafted, the onus will be on telemarketing firms to check the registry every three months and make the necessary omissions from their computerized calling systems.

Of course, the DMA didn’t take the legislation and its inherent penalties lying down. It filed suit against the FTC in January on grounds that blocking telemarketers’ access to people’s homes would violate free speech.

Other industry analysts questioned what impact the don’t-call list would have on people employed as telemarketers, and predicted that the national registry could

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result in the telemarketing industry losing up to 50 percent of its calling base.

The DMA emphasized that people can already opt out of being solicited over the phone by telling the telemarketers to put them on that particular company’s no-call lists and downplayed the need for a national list.

The DMA also administers its own Telephone Preference Service, a do-notcall list it circulates to its member companies. A consumer can register by visiting www.dmaconsumers.org, or by sending a letter with his or her full name, address and signature to Telephone Preference Service, Direct Marketing Association, P.O. Box 9014, Farmingdale, N.Y., 11735-9014.

To register for the national FTC don’tcall registry, log on to www.donotcall.gov. Currently, registration for the eastern United States is limited to the Internet. A registration phone number for this region will be available July 7.

Based on his own experiences as a consumer, and a telemarketer, John says he can vouch for the DMA’s claim that asking telemarketers not to call anymore, works.

“I can tell you this much: They really do pay attention to the law and they really do try to be nice to people,” John said. “If you say to every telemarketing company and every telemarketing call that you got, ‘Thank you, but please take me off your list,’ or, ‘Put me on your donot-call list; have a good day,’ they’ll do it. You do that for a month or two, you won’t get any more calls.”

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ommon wisdom holds, the more you tell people they can’t have something, the more they will want it.

And so it seemingly is with the resurgence of a beverage reputed to have served up madness and, in some cases, death for its drinkers.

It was never far from writer Ernest Hemingway’s side at his residence in Key West or during his travels in Spain.

A liqueur, distilled from a concoction of liquorice-smelling herbs, said to have been equal parts inspiration for Vincent Van Gogh’s beautiful still-lifes and landscapes, as well as the impulse to slice off part of his ear.

We’re talking, of course, about the Green Fairy. La Fee Verte.

Absinthe.

Shock-rocker Marilyn Manson has frequently mentioned his absinthe use in recent interviews, citing the drink as a source of inspiration for his twisted tunes.

The opalescent, greenish-yellow beverage — banned in many European countries and the United States in the early part of the last century because it was thought to cause hallucinations, insanity and death — recently has shimmered in glasses on Hollywood sets like those for the Jack the Ripper flick “From Hell” and “Moulin Rouge.”

Internet sites dedicated to absinthe have cropped up at the same time actual absinthe brands have started to be offered for sale abroad — much of Europe having lifted the ban on the beverage.

Some products, like La Fee Absinthe from Paris, are being offered for sale over the Internet, even to the U.S. — though technically, they aren’t supposed to be.

Sites also offer absinthe glasses and reproductions of the trowel-shaped, slotted, absinthe spoons, traditionally placed across a glass so water could be poured over a sugarcube to dissolve it into the drink.

It would be easy to dismiss all this attention to a long-forbidden drink as yet another ploy by dedicated capitalists to turn a buck.

But absinthe’s history and impact on the arts over the years cannot be dismissed.

By Brian Neill Photo: Brian Neill

After all, so much of the art we gaze at in museums and what we read in the greatest novels and poetry is documented to have been influenced in some way by this distilled, herbal drink.

In addition to Van Gogh and ToulouseLautrec, artists Paul Gauguin, Edgar Degas and Pablo Picasso were all absinthe imbibers.

Not only did absinthe provide inspiration for these artists, but it was frequently the object of their art as well.

Most of those depictions, such as Degas’ “L’Absinthe,” featured absinthe drinkers who appeared pensive, in reverie or depressingly detached.

The green drink was also the inspiration for Picasso’s bronze sculpture, “The Absinthe Glass,” a surrealistic, melting mass topped by an absinthe spoon and metallic sugarcube.

Hemingway, in “For Whom the Bell Tolls,” talks of absinthe’s ability to transcend all the cares and pleasures of the world.

Oscar Wilde, the famed novelist, poet and playwright, summed up absinthe in this way: “After the first glass you see things as you wish they were. After the second, you see things as they are not. Finally you see things as they really are, and that is the most horrible thing in the world.”

Much of absinthe’s history can be found in a book by Barnaby Conrad, III, titled, “Absinthe: History in a Bottle,” widely considered the bible for absinthe historians.

It also can be learned by talking with T.A. Breaux, a 36-year-old environmental biologist and chemist from New Orleans who’s had a decade-long love affair with absinthe.

Breaux first became intrigued by absinthe while in college.

“Someone once mentioned to me, ‘the green liquor that made you crazy,’” Breaux recalled during a phone interview.

“And I said, ‘Which one is that?’”

That same week, Breaux, who had an interest in liquor chemistry, coincidentally ran across Conrad’s book. He read it coverto-cover three times, and managed to contact the author to talk to him about the topic.

“I was just kind of fascinated; there really wasn’t much information on the subject and much of it was contradictory,” Breaux said, “which meant that, basically, much of it was just flat out wrong. So, not

being a person that likes being stumped by a mystery I just got into it.”

Breaux has sampled various modern-day absinthes during trips abroad and also has tried traditional, 19th-century recipes such as Pernod-Fils (Pronounced Per-no Fee) he acquired at various estate sales.

Oh, and Breaux has even made his own absinthe and plans to market it in the future.

That’s right, being a chemist enabled Breaux to reproduce batches of genuine

“We aren’t going to be looking at absinthe, sort of, in the blind. It would be in the context of thujone content ... So this would be the issue for us, is whether the (substance) is thujone-free. And that’s what we would be looking at.”

– An FDA spokesman absinthe by extracting and analyzing samples from various vintage bottles.

He was set to start production in Thailand on his own line of absinthe, under the name Jade Liqueurs, although he said things temporarily have been put on hold.

He did not elaborate.

As an absinthe connoisseur, Breaux takes the emerald drink seriously and is easily annoyed by myriad imposter brands being sold on the market today that are heavy on the sugar and rely on artificial coloring rather than plant chlorophyll to achieve their green hue.

Breaux also has seen absinthe-making kits offered online, which include packets

Happy Hour 2-5 pm daily featuring:

of herbs to be stuffed into bottles of grain alcohol to extract the oils from the various plants.

“The thing is, you cannot make absinthe at home,” Breaux said disdainfully. “Shoving herbs into a bottle of alcohol or vodka or whatever does not yield absinthe. It yields a very nasty substance which some unwitting people will assume is absinthe, and it couldn’t be further from the truth.”

Breaux said making absinthe requires the same skill as making a fine scotch

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And Breaux said people hoping to see the walls melt and cartoon characters prance around the living room after a few absinthes should look elsewhere. It isn’t gonna happen.

However, Breaux said, absinthe’s effects do differ from other potent potables.

He said traditional absinthe, which hovers around 140 proof, is full of herbs that work in both stimulative and sedative ways.

“And so it just kind of gives you a nice, pleasant, lucid sort of sensation,” Breaux said. “It’s not at all like drugs, but if you drink a couple of absinthes it’s not like drinking a couple of 151-proof rums.”

Breaux went on to describe absinthe as

having a pleasant, herbal flavor.

17 “It has a unique taste,” Breaux said. “It tastes like anise and herbs and it became M E very popular, not because it caused hallu- T cinations or gave drug-like effects, but R because, for its traditional strength, it is a O S very drinkable drink.”

In many ways, absinthe, which actually PI originated in Switzerland before it caught R on in elegant-era Paris, has received unfair I T indictment over the years, Breaux and J Conrad maintain.

Absinthe’s alleged hallucinatory and UL psychoactive qualities are attributed to one Y of its ingredients, artemisia absinthium, 3 derived from the wormwood plant.

The plant’s oil contains the chemical 2 0 thujone, which has a similar molecular 0 makeup as tetrahydrocannabinol (THC), 3 the active ingredient in marijuana.

Wormwood, in high enough doses, is also classified by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) as a poisonous plant that can lead to nerve and brain damage, even death.

In researching his book, Conrad examined stacks of medical papers and publications on wormwood and thujone before reaching the following conclusion: “We now know that alcohol itself is an addictive substance. But was absinthe more addictive than other alcoholic beverages? Probably not,” Conrad wrote, adding that “a full bottle of absinthe should be condemned more for its high alcohol content than its thujone content.”

Interestingly, Conrad’s book opens with the account of Jean Lanfray, a 31-year-old Swiss laborer who shot and killed his wife and kids in 1905 after his wife refused to polish his shoes.

The incident sparked a mass petition drive to ban absinthe in Lanfray’s village after it was discovered he had drunk two absinthes that morning.

What got little coverage in the European newspapers, however, was that the day of the murder, Lanfray also drank a creme de menthe, a cognac and soda, seven glasses of wine and a cup of coffee laced with brandy before arriving home to commit the heinous act. At the moment he snapped, Conrad wrote, Lanfray was in the process of downing another brandylaced coffee.

Although the prosecutor, himself, continued on page 18

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continued from page 17 focused attention on Lanfray’s alcoholism in general, rather than his absinthe drinking, newspapers persisted in carrying the story of “the absinthe murder,” Conrad wrote.

Soon after, in 1908, and with the help of the Swiss religious temperance league, absinthe was banned in Switzerland.

Absinthe was banned in the United States in 1912 after the drink had caught on here, particularly in New Orleans, where a landmark with its namesake, the Absinthe House, still stands as a popular tourist spot.

Between 1874 and 1910, Conrad wrote, absinthe consumption in France had grown from an annual 700,000 liters to a whopping 36 million liters a year, in part because a pest blight had wiped out winemaking crops in the late 1800s.

France banned absinthe in 1915.

That wormwood, in high doses, is poisonous is undisputed.

But Breaux and Conrad suggest that, more than the presence of wormwood and a high alcohol content, there were other forces at work that may have contributed to people losing their minds, and lives, ostensibly at the hands of absinthe.

Though Van Gogh was a famous absinthe drinker, Conrad points out in his book that the artist also drank the turpentine used to clean his brushes and may have had a congenital brain defect.

Conrad also notes that many of the absinthe drinkers at the time were multisubstance users, which may have had a cumulative effect on the deterioration of their health.

There were also few, if any, controls on beverages and foods.

Absinthe was known for its greenish hue and its tendency to louche, or take on a milky, opaque appearance when water was added.

While reputable, established producers of 19th-century absinthe achieved those traits in their products through the natural distillation of herbs, other less scrupulous makers, out to make quick and easy money, took shortcuts, using toxic substances such as copper sulfate and antimony chloride to make their absinthe look proper in the glass.

“And what you had is these poor alcoholics drinking 20 drinks a day of these toxic compounds,” Breaux said.

“And what’s going to happen?”

Despite the dangers associated with absinthe — real or perceived — the beverage is enjoying a renewed popularity judging from recent exchanges on Internet chat rooms and the number of absintherelated art and items — even actual bottles of absinthe (“for serious bottle collectors only,” the disclaimers read) — for sale on eBay. Although many absinthe brands being marketed are bogus, some, Breaux and others say, are real, though not exactly the same quality as 100 years ago.

But are these absinthe drinkers breaking the law?

The answer seems somewhat gray.

The bulk of “legitimate” absinthe comes from abroad, aficionados note.

U.S. Customs officials stated by phone and on the agency’s Web site, that importing absinthe and other liqueurs that contain “an excess of Artemisia Absinthium” (wormwood) is prohibited, and referred questions regarding “what percentage is allowable” to the FDA. After some run-around, an FDA spokesman was finally reached to talk about absinthe, as long as his name wasn’t used — an agency policy.

The spokesman said that Food Inspection Decision No. 147 banned absinthe as a “poisonous or deleterious” substance in 1912 because it contained wormwood.

However, wormwood, though poisonous in high amounts, does have a legal and legitimate use as a food additive, the spokesman said.

According to the FDA guidelines, the only permissible wormwood is that which is thujone-free, as determined by lab analysis, the spokesman said.

Breaux said he was quite familiar with the process to determine the presence of thujone, having performed it a number of times himself.

He downplayed the FDA’s absinthepolicing role, comparing the beverage to Cuban cigars.

“You can read people writing articles in cigar magazines, talking about smoking a Havana Montecristo, and no one’s knocking on their door,” Breaux said. “It’s just not that big of a deal.”

But the FDA spokesman said no one should think the agency is going to overlook absinthe.

“We aren’t going to be looking at absinthe, sort of, in the blind. It would be in the context of thujone content, because we do have this food additive regulation that authorizes extracts of wormwood to be used in food,” the spokesman said. “So this would be the issue for us, is whether the (substance) is thujone-free. And that’s what we would be looking at.”

The spokesman said the FDA can pursue seizure of the substance, injunctions prohibiting its sale and even prosecution, if it so deems.

“All of those have been used as an enforcement tool,” the spokesman said.

“I’m not suggesting that we would use any particular one of them, or the other, but any of them are options.”

But the thujone-free guideline, some absinthe enthusiasts say, seems contradictory.

Currently, they point out, there are beverages available at any local bar that contain thujone.

Vermouth, the herb-infused wine used to flavor martinis and Manhattans, contains trace amounts of thujone.

In fact, vermouth derives its name from the German wermud, which translates to wormwood, one of its key ingredients.

The college frat fave, Jagermeister, as well as the Benedictine liqueur that goes into making a Singapore sling, are also said to contain thujone.

And the producers of a product billing itself as an absinthe substitute, called Absente, also claim their product contains thujone, though far less than the 10 milligrams per liter allowed in Europe.

Absente is available at Summerville Ace liquor store in Augusta.

All of that said, I managed to get my hands on a bottle of Un Emile 68, an absinthe produced in Pontarlier, France, and one which Breaux cites as one of the most traditional available today.

The “68” refers to the alcohol percentage, making it about 136 proof.

The makers of Un Emile purport to use wormwood distillate in a 19th-century recipe derived from the Pernod family, one of the leading makers of absinthe in the day.

An intense aroma of licorice, owing to the anise, rose from the bottle. It was a pleasant smell, albeit a tad medicinal.

In preparation for the ritual, I poured about three-fourths of a shot into a glass. The absinthe was a clear, golden color, much like a scotch would be, and not the artificially colored green of many bogus brands Breaux says are on the market today.

As I swirled the absinthe around in the glass, droplets of the dense alcohol that became stranded on the sides slowly ambled back down to rejoin their source.

I placed a reproduction absinthe spoon across the mouth of the glass and topped it with a sugarcube.

Slowly, I trickled cold water over the sugarcube and into the glass.

At first I was puzzled, because the contents of the glass did not louche.

Then, after a few more slow trickles of water, the liquid in the glass took on that cloudy, opaline appearance I was expecting.

An observer said the contents of the glass looked like lemonade.

My anticipation grew as the Green Hour (l’heure verte), as it was called in French cafes during absinthe’s day, arrived.

I took a casual first sip and was greeted with a dense, licorice flavor that had a numbing effect on my tongue. Alcohol was definitely present, but despite the drink’s high proof, there wasn’t that firein-the-throat feeling.

It was fairly refreshing for its strength.

By the third or fourth sip, I started to feel very warm inside.

After finishing my first, I fixed another.

Then another, this time taking a small sip of it neat.

The warmth and thick anise taste were amazing, and even sipped straight, the absinthe did not bring on the burn one

19 M E T R O S P I R I T

“ ... It just kind of gives you a nice, pleasant, lucid sort of sensation. It’s not at all like drugs, but if you drink a couple of absinthes it’s not like drinking a couple of 151-proof rums.”

J U L Y 3 2 0 0 3

– T.A. Breaux, absinthe connoisseur

would expect from an alcohol of similar strength.

However, “only a lunatic,” would drink absinthe straight, a former University of Edinburgh professor is quoted saying in Conrad’s book. I went ahead and added the water, this time without sugar, to the third drink.

By now I was quite comfortable.

I didn’t hallucinate, nor did I feel compelled to attempt a post-impressionist rendition of my surroundings.

But I have to admit, there was something a little different. I felt like I was experiencing a slightly enhanced sense of awareness, becoming more attuned to things like the whirring drone of an airconditioner and the shadows cast by a turning ceiling fan.

Of course, that could have been my imagination. Or, again, the strong alcohol.

Nonetheless, I quickly realized something: Though I’m no big licorice fan, this was something I could really get to like. It truly was pleasant.

After finishing the three drinks, including a few more small measures — you know, just to shore up the water a bit — I felt more relaxed than drunk. And the next morning, I awoke feeling nothing in the way of ill effects or hangover.

So why all the fuss and controversy?

Breaux chalks it up to hype, such as the scene in “From Hell” in which Depp lights a sugarcube on fire for his absinthe.

“It’s ridiculous. First of all, no one in the old days did the modern-day, Czech (sugar) flaming ritual,” Breaux said. “It’s strictly for effect and, historically speaking, is absolutely ludicrous.

“These people are not historians, they’re just trying to create a sensation. They’re

actors or musicians. They thrive on that.”

Breaux thinks Europe could have lifted the ban on absinthe much sooner than only a few years ago if people had looked harder at the facts.

And he thinks absinthe should be accepted as a diversionary spirit, subjected to the same regulations and controls as many other foods and beverages.

“I mean, they have very specific rules in France for making anything from certain regional cheeses, to certain regional wines, to liquors,” Breaux said. “They could have easily done the same thing with absinthe but they didn’t do it, and, because of that, we’ve had a century of rumors and myths.

“And one day I hope people will come to understand absinthe as a liquor of art, and not some type of drug that it certainly is not.”

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20 M E T R O

Fabulous Fourth Celebration!

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!Demos & Contests: !Hula Hoops !Yo-Yo’s !Bubbles !Jump Rope

J U L Y 3 2 0 0 3

!Science of Ice Cream Demo with ice cream samples !"Return of the Dinosaurs" Exhibit !Open Until 7pm on July 4th !1/2 Price admission after 3pm

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828-0-TAN (0826)

Arts

21 M E T R O

& Entertainment

J U L Y

Mud-Wrestling Participants Get Down and Dirty

L

ast Friday night was the second time that mud wrestlers — not musicians — took the stage at Crossroads to entertain. Come 11 o’clock, the stage was cleared, heavy tarps were laid down and hung up, and the crowd was pushing forward to get a glimpse of the larger-than-average kiddie pool whose contents were slowly swirling into a thin mud, courtesy of a garden hose.

“We’re trying to spice things up,” said Crossroads owner Scott Levine. “I think the summer’s when things seem to die down a little bit.”

And when the summer drought takes away local musicians who are booking out-of-town gigs or taking a vacation over the next couple weeks, you’ve got to think up some creative ways to entertain bar patrons.

“We’ve never done it before. It was just

something different to do,” Levine said.

Judging from last week’s crowd, the mud-wrestling concept is working. The area in front of the stage was densely packed with a mostly male crowd, hootin’ and hollerin’ and just waiting for the first pair of ladies to throw down.

That match was between two Crossroads bartenders. Clad in shorts and tank tops, the two looked like they were having fun rather than catfighting, and they didn’t get as messy as the girls participating in the two subsequent fights.

That’s just the kind of wrestling Levine is looking for.

“We want to see more fun than ‘Ultimate Fighting’ or something like that,” he explained.

While the next two matches didn’t skimp on the fun factor, they did include gals that weren’t afraid to try a few choice moves — like a body slam right

S P I R I T

3 2 0 0 3

By Lisa Jordan

into the mud that was enough to get the crowd cheering and slinging their plastic beer cups in the air.

Of the event’s first installment, Levine said, “It went great. I mean, the girls that wrestled had a good time, and the girls that were actively wrestling got the biggest crowd participation.”

And don’t think that you’ll emerge from Crossroads squeaky-clean just because you’re not in the pit. There were a few times that the mud-slinging went beyond the plastic boundaries Crossroads staff had set up.

“We’re still working out all these details, making sure all the electrical equipment is protected,” Levine said.

“People up front seem to get sprayed with a little bit of mud.” While patrons have asked about seeing the ladies wrestle in spaghetti, Jell-O or even pudding, Levine doesn’t seem to think that would

be the most prudent course of action. “(Mud) comes off with soap and water.”

If you’re a girl and you think it would be fun to get down and dirty, Crossroads is on the lookout for participants. At last Friday’s event, emcee Freakboy of 95 Rock fame asked if any females in the crowd were willing to participate — before he got thrown in the mud himself.

“We actively have to get out and recruit. It’s difficult to find women to mud wrestle,” said Levine. “We’re actively recruiting.”

The fun continues this Friday, with music by Jemani and 420 Outback preceding the messy festivities. The cover is $5, and covers both the music and at least 45 minutes to an hour of mud wrestling. Levine is planning to make it a weekly event, at least through these hot summer months. For more information, call Crossroads at 724-4511.

Photography by Jimmy Carter

22 M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 3 2 0 0 3

8

DaysA Week

Arts

Auditions AUDITIONS FOR “GREASE” will be held at 7 p.m. July 1415 and 11 a.m. July 19 at St. John United Methodist Church, 736 Greene St. Roles available for men and women ages 1750. Please prepare a solo from the show or a 1950s style rock ‘n’ roll song; accompanist provided. Contact the Augusta Players at 826-4707 for information.

AUDITIONS FOR “THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW” now being held. Must be 18 or older to audition. For details, phone 589-4269.

ENTRIES NOW BEING ACCEPTED for “A Sense of Place 2003: Continuity and Change in the New South” juried fine ar t competition. Open to all ar tists in the South ages 18 and older. Works in the following categories will be accepted: painting, drawing, printmaking, photography, sculpture and mixed media. Entries must be postmarked by July 18. For an entry form or more information, contact the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t at 722-5495 or visit www.ghia.org/exhibit.

AUGUSTA CONCERT BAND rehearses Monday evenings and is looking to fill vacancies on most band instruments.

Interested par ties should contact Ben Easter, (803) 2020091 or e-mail bandforaugusta@aol.com.

SWEET ADELINES PEACH STATE CHORUS OPEN REHEARSAL open rehearsal for singers each Thursday at 7 p.m. at Church of Christ, 600 Mar tintown Rd. in Nor th Augusta. No rehearsal will be held the week of Independence Day. They are on the lookout for voices in the lower ranges.

Contact Mary Norman at (803) 279-6499.

Education SCOTTISH COUNTRY DANCE LESSONS begin July 12 at Aiken Center for the Ar ts. Experienced and beginner dancers welcome; wear comfor table clothes and shoes. For more information, call (803) 376-5081 or e-mail marilynnk@scchamber.net. Pre-register by contacting Brenda Sleasman, (803) 641-9094.

FIGURE DRAWING WORKSHOP July 13 at the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t. Registration required; call 722-5495.

USC-AIKEN MUSIC CONSERVATORY PROGRAM now open.

Students of all ages and experience levels welcome. Private lessons available for musical instruments and voice; instructors are USC-Aiken faculty and have at least a master’s degree in their per formance area. (803) 641-3288.

Exhibitions ART BY AUDREY CROSBY will be on display at the Gibbs Library during July. Call 863-1946 for info.

PHOTOGRAPHY BY PAGEMAN DELJOU is now on exhibit at Sacred Space Yoga Studio. Viewings are by appointment only. Contact Kimberly Tompkins, 736-8023.

John Michael Montgomery is the featured performer at the Country Grand Slam concert, July 4 at Lake Olmstead Stadium.

WORKS BY RAY STURKEY will be at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History during July. 724-3576.

“PICTURES FOR MISS JOSIE,” collages and drawings by Benny Andrews, will be at the Mary Pauline Gallery through Aug. 16. For more information, call 724-9542.

WORK BY DANIEL HAYES is on display at Borders Books and Music during July in celebration of the one-year anniversary of his first Borders exhibit. Call 737-6962 for details.

“ARTVENTURE 2003: SELF-PORTRAITS” exhibition of works by students in the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t’s outreach program through July 25. 722-5495.

“PORTRAITURE IN THE SECOND AND THIRD DIMENSIONS” will be on display at the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t through July 25. Call 722-5495 for info.

THE WALTER O. EVANS COLLECTION OF AFRICAN-AMERICAN ART on view at the Morris Museum of Ar t through Aug. 10. Call 724-7501 for details.

“EYE OF THE STORM: THE CIVIL WAR DRAWINGS OF ROBERT SNEDEN” will be on display at the Augusta Museum of History through July 13. For more information, call 722-8454.

Dance THE AUGUSTA INTERNATIONAL FOLK DANCE CLUB meets Thursday evenings at 7:30 p.m. No par tners are needed and newcomers are welcome. Line and circle dances are taught.

For location information, call 737-6299.

ART CLASSES AND WORKSHOPS are offered year-round at the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t. Classes and workshops are open to toddlers through adults and feature instruction in drawing, painting, photography, pot tery, weaving and sculpture. For a newslet ter or detailed information on registering for classes at the Ger trude Herber t, call 722-5495. The Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t also offers educational tours; for information, contact the Education Director at the above telephone number.

THE DANCES OF UNIVERSAL PEACE held the first Saturday of every month, 7-9 p.m., at the Unitarian Church of Augusta, honors the religious traditions of the world through song and movement. Call (803) 643-0460 for more information.

ART CLASSES FOR CHILDREN AND ADULTS at the Ar t Factory. The Ar t Factory also has a homeschool program and scholarships are available. Available programs include voice lessons and pantomime workshops, as well as classes in dance, theater, music, visual ar ts and writing. Call 7310008 for details.

AUGUSTA CHAPTER OF THE UNITED STATES AMATEUR BALLROOM DANCERS ASSOCIATION holds a dance the first Saturday of each month, from 7:15 to 11 p.m. Cost is $7 for members and $10 for non-members. Held at the BPOE Facility on Elkdom Cour t. Contact Melvis Lovet t, 733-3890, or Jean Avery, 863-4186, for information.

SECOND SATURDAY DANCE at the Ballroom Dance Center, 225 Grand Slam Drive in Evans, held the second Saturday of every month, 7:30-11 p.m. Dress is casual. Tickets are $10 per person. 854-8888.

CSRA/AUGUSTA BOGEY-WOOGIE DANCE AND SOCIAL GROUP meets every Wednesday at 6:45 p.m. at A World of Dance Studio. Couples, singles and newcomers are welcome. The group also offers beginner shag lessons all summer. For information, phone 650-2396.

SINGLES DANCE each Saturday night from 8-11 p.m. sponsored by the Christian Social Organization for Single Adults.

Held at Westside High School. Tickets $5 for members, $7 for non-members and are available at the door. For more information, contact Doris Heath, 736-3376.

Music VIOLINIST PATRICE MINOR-FLOYD per forms at First Providence Baptist Church, 315 Bar ton Rd., in Nor th Augusta July 12. Free concer t begins at 6 p.m. For information, call (803) 279-8836.

“LIFT EVERY VOICE AND SING: AFRICAN-AMERICAN MUSIC SERIES” continues July 13, 2 p.m., with a per formance of “Golden Age Gospel” by the Celebration Gospel Ensemble at the Morris Museum of Ar t. Free admission.

724-7501.

SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE event at Riverwalk’s Eighth Street Plaza July 12, 7-11 p.m. Free admission. Live enter tainment, food and other fun is planned. Call Riverwalk Special Events for details, 821-1754.

RIVERWALK JAZZ CANDLELIGHT CONCERT SERIES Sundays through Aug. 24, 8-9:30 p.m. at Riverwalk’s Eighth Street Bulkhead. Schedule is as follows: Quiet Storm, July 6; Buzz Clif ford Piano Trio, July 13; Kay King and Edna Stewar t, July 20; Air Apparent, July 27; Soul Bar Jazz Quar tet, Aug. 3; Jazz-a-ma-tazz, Aug. 10; Quiet Storm, Aug. 17; Josef Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express, Aug. 24. Admission is $5 per concer t, or you may purchase season tickets for $50. Bring a blanket or lawn chair and a picnic basket. For information, call Riverwalk Special Events at 821-1754.

DOWNTOWN LUNCH DATE July 3, 10, 17, 24 and 31, noon2:30 p.m., at Augusta Common. Bring a lunch or eat lunch catered by the featured restaurant while listening to live music. 821-1754.

HOPELANDS SUMMER CONCERT SERIES continues July 7 with a per formance by the Parris Island Marine Band. All concer ts begin at 7 p.m. on the Windham Per forming Ar ts

Stage at Hopeland Gardens in Aiken. In the event of rain, concer ts will be held in Gym 2 at the H.O. Weeks Center.

Free admission. Call (803) 642-7631 for information.

MUSIC IN THE PARK at Creighton Living History Park in Nor th Augusta at 7 p.m. July 10; Candlelight concer t 8 p.m.

July 24. Split Rail per forms July 10. Free. (803) 442-7588.

COMMUNITY HEALING MEDITATION DRUMMING CIRCLE hosted every third Monday of the month by IDRUM2U, the Not Gaddy Drumming Studio. Held 7-9 p.m. at the G.L. Jackson Conference Center, 1714 Nor th Leg Cour t. Fee is $5 or a donation of canned goods for the Golden Harvest Food Bank. All are welcome and drums will be available to rent. For info, phone the Not Gaddy Drumming Studio, 228-3200.

Theater “A ... MY NAME IS ALICE” will be performed at For t Gordon Dinner Theatre weekends July 11-12, 18-19 and 24-26.

Tickets are $28-$30 or $12 for show only. Call the box office at 793-8552 or visit www.for tgordon.com for reservations.

“RUMORS” will be per formed at the Abbeville Opera House in Abbeville, S.C., July 11-12, 18-19 and 25-26 at 8 p.m., with matinees July 12, 19 and 26 at 3 p.m. Tickets are $15 for adults, $14 for youth ages 4-12, seniors 65 and older and groups of 10 or more. (864) 459-2157.

“WHERE THE LILIES BLOOM” will be at Aiken Community Playhouse’s Washington Center for the Per forming Ar ts in Aiken July 11-13 and 18-19. Friday and Saturday per formances are at 8 p.m.; Sunday matinees are at 3 p.m. Tickets are $10 adult, $8 senior, $6 student and $4 child. Call (803) 648-1438 for tickets and information.

RICKEY SMILEY, THE PRINCE OF COMEDY, comes to the Bell Auditorium July 6, 7 p.m. Tickets are $32.50 for floor seating and $28.50 for balcony seating. For ticket purchases, contact TicketMaster by phone at 828-7700 or online at www.ticketmaster.com.

Attractions AUGUSTA CANAL INTERPRETIVE CENTER: Housed in Enterprise Mill, the center contains displays and models focusing on the Augusta Canal’s functions and importance to the

textile industry. Hours are Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-6 p.m. and Sun., 1-6 p.m. Admission is $5 adult, $4 seniors and military and $3 children ages 6-18. Children under 6 admitted free. For information, visit www.augustacanal.com or call 823-0440.

THE BOYHOOD HOME OF WOODROW WILSON: Circa 1859 Presbyterian manse occupied by the family of President Woodrow Wilson as a child during the Civil War and Reconstruction. Original and period antiques, restored house, kitchen and carriage house. 419 Seventh Street.

Open 10 a.m.-5 p.m., Tues.-Sat. Tours available; groups of 10 or more by appointment only. Admission is $5 adults, $4 seniors, $3 students under 18 and free for ages five and under. 722-9828.

THE MORRIS MUSEUM OF ART hosts exhibitions and special events year-round. Open Tuesday-Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Sundays, noon-5 p.m. Closed on Mondays and major holidays. 1 Tenth Street, Augusta. Call 724-7501 or visit www.themorris.org for details.

THE MUSEUM OF LAUREL AND HARDY OF HARLEM, GEORGIA features displays of various Laurel and Hardy memorabilia; films also shown. Located at 250 N. Louisville Street in downtown Harlem. Open 1-4 p.m. ThursdayMonday. For more information, call 556-3448.

AUGUSTA GOLF & GARDENS OF THE GEORGIA GOLF HALL OF FAME features beautiful display gardens, as well as bronze sculptures of some of golf’s greatest masters.

Available for rent for a variety of functions. Group discount rates available. Closed Mondays; open from 9 a.m.-5 p.m.

Tues.-Sat.; open from 1-5 p.m. on Sunday. New spring and summer hours begin March 21: open Tues.-Sat. 9 a.m.-9 p.m. and Sundays 11 a.m.-7 p.m. Admission is $5.50 for adults; $4.50 for students, seniors and military; $3.50 for children (4 to 12); free for children 3 and under. Sundays are two for one with a Super Sunday coupon. Annual garden memberships are available. Call 724-4443 or 1-888-8744443. Also, visit their Web site at www.gghf.org.

LUNCH AT NOON LECTURE SERIES held the second Wednesday of every month at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History, 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Call the museum at 724-3576 for more information.

NATIONAL SCIENCE CENTER’S FORT DISCOVERY: Children and adults alike can immerse themselves in the wonders of science through live demonstrations, vir tual realities, Starlab, KidScape and more than 250 hands-on exhibits.

General Admission: $8 for adults; $6 for children, seniors and active military. Group rates available. Operating hours: Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sunday, noon-5 p.m. Call 8210200, 1-800-325-5445 or visit their Web site at www.NationalScienceCenter.org.

NIGHT HIKE AND A WALK IN THE WOODS at Spirit Creek Educational Forest. July 7 Night Hike and campfire begins at 8 p.m. A Walk in the Woods, July 8, takes place from 9-11 a.m. Both events are free. Call 790-2351 for information.

REDCLIFFE STATE HISTORIC SITE: 1859 mansion of S.C. Governor James Henry Hammond, held by the family for three generations until 1975. Hours are 9 a.m.-6 p.m., Thursday-Monday on the grounds. House tours are noon-3 p.m. by appointment. Closed Tuesday and Wednesday.

Admission to the grounds is free. Fee for house tours is $3 for adults and children ages 6-17. For more information, call (803) 827-1473. 181 Redcliffe Road, Beech Island.

PUBLIC HEARING TO REPEAL THE PATRIOT ACT will be held 7 p.m. July 3 at the Main Library, 902 Greene St. For more information, contact Denice Traina, 736-4738.

SACRED HEART CULTURAL CENTER is offering tours of its 100-year-old building. Mon.-Fri., 9 a.m.-5 p.m. $1 per person, children free. 826-4700.

HISTORIC COTTON EXCHANGE WELCOME CENTER: Open Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-6 p.m.; Sun. 1-5 p.m. Riverwalk. Free.

The center also offers guided driving tours of downtown Augusta and Summerville every Saturday through Aug. 4 from 1:30-3:30 p.m. and at other times upon request. Cost for tours is $10 for adults and $5 for children ages 12 and under. Reservations are suggested. Call 724-4067.

THE EZEKIEL HARRIS HOUSE: Deemed “the finest 18th century house surviving in Georgia” by the “Smithsonian Guide to Historic America.” Open Saturday, 10 a.m.-1 p.m. General admission is $2; senior admission is $1 and children get in for 50 cents. For more information, call 724-0436.

Museums “ARTRAGEOUS SUNDAY: YOU’VE GOT RHYTHM” July 6 at the Morris Museum of Ar t. Dance instructor Beverlee Nichols leads an exploration of the Walter O. Evans Collection of African-American ar t, emphasizing the use of rhythm in ar t and dance. Star ts at 2 p.m.; free admission. 724-7501.

“RETURN OF THE DINOSAURS” exhibit at For t Discovery through Sept. 21. A group of animatronic dinosaurs will be on display in the Knox Gallery. Admission to the exhibit is free with paid general admission to For t Discovery. For information, call 821-0200 or 1-800-325-5445.

“COLLECTING AFRICAN-AMERICAN ART” talk by Atlanta ar t collector Paul R. Jones at the Morris Museum of Ar t July 17.

Admission is $3 for adults and $2 for seniors, students and the military. 724-7501.

THE GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART in Ware’s Folly exhibits works by local and regional ar tists. Ar t classes, workshops and other educational programming for children, youth and adults are held in the Walker-Mackenzie Studio. Ware’s Folly galleries open Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Thursday, 10 a.m.-7 p.m.; and Saturday by appointment only. The Walker-Mackenzie Studio gallery is open Tuesday-Friday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Admission is free, but a donation of $2 for adults and $1 for children and seniors is encouraged. Call 722-5495 for more info.

THE AUGUSTA MUSEUM OF HISTORY hosts permanent exhibition “Augusta’s Story,” an award-winning exhibit encompassing 12,000 years of local history. For the younger crowd, there’s the Susan L. Still Children’s Discovery Gallery, where kids can learn about history in a hands-on environment. The museum also shows films in the History Theatre and hosts a variety of programs. Located at 560 Reynolds Street. Open Tuesday-Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Sunday 1-5 p.m. Admission is $4 adult, $3 seniors, $2 kids (6-18 years of age) and free for children under 6. Free

23

admission on Sundays. Call 722-8454 or visit www.augustamuseum.org for more information.

Special Events GREYHOUND MEET AND GREET: The greyhounds of GreytHound Love Greyhound Adoption will be at Saturn of Augusta 11 a.m.-3 p.m. July 12. For more information, visit www.greythoundlove.org or call 796-1708 or (803) 278-5441.

JULY FILM SERIES Tuesdays, 6:30 p.m., at Headquar ters Library. July 8 showing of “American Beauty,” July 15 showing of “The Graduate,” July 22 showing of “Citizen Ruth” and July 29 showing of “Seventh Seal.” Call 7366244 for more information.

GRASSROOTS ARTS PROGRAM grant applications are now being accepted by the Greater Augusta Ar ts Council. Funds from the Grassroots Ar ts Program suppor t community ar ts projects. Applications are due July 18. For more information and application forms, contact Erin Swenson, 826-4702.

SWAMP SATURDAY at Phinizy Swamp Nature Park July 5, 9:30 a.m. One-and-a-half hour tour through the park; dress appropriately for the weather and for walking, and bring insect repellent, sunscreen, water, cameras and binoculars.

Free; donations are accepted. 828-2109.

FRIDAY EVENING THEATER July 11, 7 p.m., at Augusta Common. Admission is $1 per person; children 5 and under are free. Bring blankets and/or lawn chairs. 821-1754.

PEACE VIGIL every Saturday until U.S. troops come home, noon-2 p.m. at the corner of Wrightsboro and Walton Way Ex t., near the Army Reserve office. For more information, contact Denice Traina, 736-4738.

MCDUFFIE FRIENDS OF ANIMALS holds pet adoptions each Saturday, 1-3 p.m. at Superpetz on Bobby Jones Expressway. Call 556-9090 or visit www.pet finder.com.

COLUMBIA COUNTY HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 11 a.m.-3 p.m. and every Sunday from 1-4 p.m. at PetsMar t. For more info, call 860-5020.

By Celeste Raspanti Based on the book by Vera & Bill

Our Hot Breakfast Sandwiches Are The Best In Town

S P I R I T

Cleaver

J U L Y

Directed by Dave Howard July 11, 12, 18, & 19 at 8:00 p.m Matinee Sunday July 13 th 3 p.m.

The Washington Center for the Performing Arts 124 Newberry St. Aiken, SC

Reservations 803-648-1438

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3

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RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL AND AUGUSTA ANIMAL RESCUE FRIENDS holds pet adoptions at Superpetz of f Bobby Jones Expressway every Sunday from 1-4 p.m. Call AARF at 364-4747 or visit www.aar f.net. Adoptions also held at the Richmond County Animal Control Shelter, Tues.-Sun., 1-5 p.m. Call the shelter at 790-6836.

THE CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 10 a.m.-4 p.m. and every Wednesday evening from 5:30-7:30 p.m. at the Pet Center located behind the GreenJackets Stadium on Milledge Rd. 261-PETS.

Out of Town ADOPTION INFORMATION SESSION July 12, 2-6 p.m., at the Independent Adoption Center in Tucker, Ga. For more information or to reserve a place, call 1-800-385-4016.

THE 2003 GEORGIA GAMES will be held July 11-20 at various sites around Atlanta. For more information, contact the Georgia State Games Commission at (770) 528-3580.

SOUTH CAROLINA PEACH FESTIVAL July 12-21 in Gaffney, S.C. Country music stars will per form, and a parade, tractor pulls and more will be featured. Contact Dennis Fowler at

M E T R O

Fireworks, Laser Show, Carnival, Live Music & Military Displays!

July 3, 2003 z Fort Gordon Carnival, 10 a.m. - 9 p.m.

Main Event begins at 5 p.m.

Easy access to Fort Gordon. All patrons 16 & over must have photo I.D. Call 791-6779 for more information or go to www.fortgordon.com.

Sponsorship does not imply an endorsement by the U.S. Army.

2 0 0 3

24 (864) 489-9066 for info.

“THE ART OF LYON HILL: THE MYSTERY AND MECHANICS

M OF MARIONETTES” July 15-Aug. 18 at the Sumter Gallery of E T Ar t in Sumter, S.C. Call (803) 775-0543.

R O MAGNOLIA AR ABIAN HORSE SHOW July 12 at the S P I R I T

Georgia National Fairgrounds and Agricenter in Perr y, Ga. (912) 984-5177.

ATLANTA KENNEL CLUB DOG SHOW July 10-13 at the Georgia National Fairgrounds and Agricenter in Perry, Ga. (770) 740-1558.

J FLORIDA INTERNATIONAL FESTIVAL featuring classical, U jazz, bluegrass, more; the London Symphony Orchestra L continues their summer residency this year. Held July 11Y

27 in Day tona Beach, Fla. Call (386) 257-7790 or visit

3 www.fif-lso.org.

2 “GREASE,” starring Frankie Avalon, will be at the Fox Theatre 0 in Atlanta July 8-13. Tuesday-Sunday per formances are at 8 0 p.m., Saturday and Sunday matinees are 2 p.m. Tickets are 3

$20-$52.50 and can be purchased through TicketMaster, online at www.ticketmaster.com or by phone at 828-7700.

DIXIE REINING HORSE SHOW July 3-6 at the Georgia National Fairgrounds and Agricenter in Perry, Ga. (229) 423-2137.

“TWELVE ANGRY MEN” through July 20 at the Class Act Theatre in Mariet ta, Ga. Showtimes are Fridays and Saturdays, 8 p.m., and Sundays at 3 p.m. Tickets are $18 adult, $15 seniors and children. Call (770) 579-3156.

“MY WAY: A MUSICAL TRIBUTE TO FRANK SINATRA” at the Ar ts Center of Coastal Carolina, Hilton Head Island, S.C., through July 19. Tickets are $37 adult, $34 matinee and $31 preview; children under 16 get in for half price. Call (843) 842-ARTS to make reservations.

“A SALUTE TO 25 YEARS OF THE GEORGIA MUSIC HALL OF FAME AWARDS” runs through Jan. 18, 2004, at the Georgia Music Hall of Fame in Macon, Ga. Exhibits, programs and events honoring the 25th anniversary of the Georgia Music Hall of Fame awards. Call 1-888-GA-ROCKS for info.

COWPARADE ATLANTA features over 200 life-sized, fiberglass cows painted by local ar tists and placed throughout Atlanta. The cows will be on public display through Sept. 14.

For information, call (404) 898-2915 or visit www.cowparadeatlanta.com.

GEORGIA SHAKESPEARE FESTIVAL runs through Nov. 2 with per formances of “Much Ado About Nothing,” “The School for Wives,” “The Tale of Cymbeline” and “The Tempest.” Tickets are $23-$32, with special $10 preview shows. Held at the Conant Per forming Ar ts Center on the campus of Oglethorpe University in Atlanta. Call (404) 2640020 for information.

REEDY RIVER NIGHTTIME CONCERT SERIES through Aug. 28 at the Peace Center Amphitheatre in Greenville, S.C. Free.

(864) 467-6667.

SHAKESPEARE IN THE PARK festival through Aug. 3 in Greenville, S.C. Plays presented by Warehouse Theatre. Call (864) 235-6948.

JEKYLL ISLAND MUSICAL THEATRE FESTIVAL includes per formances of “Schoolhouse Rock Live,” “State Fair” and “Hello, Dolly!” in rotating reper tory at the Jekyll Island Amphitheatre in Jekyll Island, Ga., through July 27. For information, call (912) 635-4060 or (229) 333-2150.

AT THE GEORGIA MUSEUM OF ART in Athens, Ga.: “The Weaving Room: The History of Weaving at Berry College” through July 6; “Old Worlds, New Lands,” through Aug. 31; “Becoming a Nation: Americana From the Diplomatic Reception Rooms, U.S. Depar tment of State,” July 5-Aug. 31. Call (706) 542-4662.

HARDEEVILLE (S.C.) MOTOR SPEEDWAY 2003 RACING SCHEDULE is July 12 and 26 and Aug. 9, 16 and 30. For information, call (843) 784-RACE. THE HIGH MUSEUM OF ART’S FOLK ART AND PHOTOGRAPH GALLERIES host two exhibitions through Aug. 9: “Land of Myth and Memory: Clarence John Laughlin and Photographers of the South” and “Faces and Places: Picturing the Self in Self-Taught Ar t.” Call (404) 577-6940.

Benefits CELEBRITY SOFTBALL CHALLENGE to benefit the CSRA Humane Society July 13 at Lake Olmstead Stadium. Gates open at noon. Tickets are $5. Call 731-9000, ext. 340, for details.

AUGUSTA-RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL is in need of dog and cat food, cat lit ter and other pet items, as well as monetary donations to help pay for vaccinations.

Donations accepted during regular business hours, Tues.-

Sun., 1-5 p.m. at the shelter, 4164 Mack Lane. Call 7906836 for information.

SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER BLOOD DRIVES in various locations around the CSRA this month. The blood center is urging people of all blood types to donate in order to combat a blood supply shor tage. For detailed information on locations and times to donate, visit www.shepeardblood.org. You may also call Susan Edwards at (803) 6437996 for information on Aiken locations and Nancy Szocinski at 737-4551 for information on all other locations.

AMERICAN RED CROSS BLOOD DRIVES at the Aiken Red Cross Blood Center on Millbrook Drive and the Augusta Red Cross Blood Center on Pleasant Home Road. The bloodmobile will also stop at various area locations this week. For a complete list, call the Aiken Blood Center at (803) 642-5180 or the Augusta Blood Center at 868-8800.

Learning “USING THE COMPUTER FOR INVESTMENTS” workshop at the Wallace Branch Library July 12, 1-3 p.m. Call 722-6275 for information.

BASIC MICROSOFT WORD CLASS Tuesdays, July 8-Aug. 5 or Thursdays, July 10-Aug. 7. Classes are held 11 a.m.12:30 p.m. at the Wallace Branch Library. Call 722-6275 to register.

AUGUSTA STATE UNIVERSITY CONTINUING EDUCATION is now offering the following classes: Stained Glass, Ice Skating, Yoga, Beginning Shag, Belly Dance, Introduction to the World of Wine, Drivers Education and more. Also, ASU offers online courses. For more information, call 737-1636 or visit www.ced.aug.edu.

AIKEN TECH CONTINUING EDUCATION offers the following courses: Microsof t PowerPoint XP, Adobe Photoshop 6.0, Microsof t Cer tified Technical Education Training, Health Care Courses, Infant Massage, Rape Aggression Defense, S.C. Childcare Training System, Defensive Driving, Driver Education, Motorcycle Safety and more. Aiken Tech also offers Education to Go classes online. For more information or to register, call (803) 593-9231, ex t. 1230.

Health HATHA YOGA with Tess Stephens at the St. Joseph Wellness Center in Daniel Village Plaza. Daytime classes held from 10 a.m.-noon Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Evening classes held from 5:30-7:30 p.m. Monday and Wednesday and also 6:30-8:30 p.m. Tuesday and Thursday. Cost is $60 per month for unlimited classes or $10 per class. For more information, contact Tess at 738-2782.

FREE HATHA AND KRIYA YOGA CLASSES at Christ Church Unity. Hatha Yoga classes Mondays and Wednesdays, 910:30 a.m.; meditation-focused Kriya Yoga Tuesdays 6-7:30 p.m. Voluntary offerings are accepted. Call 738-2458 for more information.

FREE COMMUNITY MEDITATION Sundays, 10-10:45 a.m. at Sacred Space Yoga Studio. 736-8023.

AMERICAN CANCER SOCIETY’S “I CAN COPE” PROGRAM for those diagnosed with cancer, as well as their family and friends. The “I Can Cope” series offers educational sessions and suppor t. The nex t series will be held July 8, 15, 22 and 29. There is no charge, but registration is encouraged.

Refreshments and childcare will be provided. To register, call 731-9900 or 1-800-ACS-2345.

THE MCG BREAST CANCER SUPPORT GROUP meets the third Thursday of every month at 7 p.m. and provides education and suppor t for those with breast cancer. For information, call 721-1467.

DIET COUNSELING CLASSES for diabetics and those with high cholesterol at CSRA Par tners in Health, 1220 Augusta West Parkway. Free. Call 860-3001 for class schedule.

PROJECT LINK COMMUNITY LECTURE SERIES is held the first Tuesday of every month and is sponsored by the MCG Children’s Medical Center. Project Link provides educational resources and guidance for families who have children with developmental delays, disabilities and other specialized health concerns. July 1 lecture is on autism. Free and open to the public; takes place from 6:30-8 p.m. in the main conference room at the Children’s Medical Center. Call 7216838 for information.

UNIVERSITY HEALTH CARE SYSTEM COMMUNITY EDUCATION holds workshops, seminars and classes on a variety of topics: weight and nutrition, women’s health, cancer, diabetes, seniors’ health and more. Suppor t groups and health screenings are also offered. Call 736-0847 for details.

Rickey Smiley, a.k.a. The Prince of Comedy, will be entertaining at the Bell Auditorium July 6.

PEACHCARE FOR KIDS AND RIGHT FROM THE START MEDICADE offers free or low-cost health coverage to qualifying families. Coverage includes prenatal care, hospitalization, vaccines, dental and vision care and is available to pregnant women of all ages and to children through age 19. Contact the RSM Project at 729-2086 or 721-5611 for information.

YOGA CLASSES at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital are held on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 7-8 a.m. for $45/month or 10:30 a.m. to noon for $55/month. Call 823-6294.

FREE HIV/AIDS TESTING every Tuesday from 4-7 p.m. at St. Stephen’s Ministry, 922 Greene Street. Free anonymous testing, pre- and post-test counseling and education.

A FREE WOMEN’S HEALTH CLINIC is held from 6-8 p.m. on Tuesdays at the Salvation Army and Welfare Center, 1383 Greene St. Services include Pap smear, breast exam and the diagnosis and treatment of sexually transmit ted diseases.

For more info or an appointment, call the St. Vincent dePaul Health Center at 828-3444.

W.G. WATSON, M.D., WOMEN’S CENTER CONDUCTS EDUCATION CLASSES at University Hospital. Course topics include Lamaze, breast feeding, parenting and grandparenting. Par tners will learn positive suppor t techniques. There are also programs designed to help older siblings adjust to new family members. Some classes are free, while others require a fee. Registration is required by calling 774-2825.

Kids REPTILE SHOW BY THE SAVANNAH RIVER ECOLOGY LAB 2-4 p.m. July 16 at the Wallace Branch Library. Call 7226275 for more information.

STORYTIME WITH TORIECA FLANAGAN 10 a.m. July 16 and 30 at the Ma xwell Branch Library. Call 793-2020 for more information.

“FREE WILLY” FILM SERIES Saturdays at the Ma xwell Branch Library. “Free Willy” will be shown July 12, “Free Willy 2” will be shown July 19 and “Free Willy 3” will be shown July 26. Films star t at 11 a.m. and children under 8 must be accompanied by a guardian at least 16 years old.

Call 763-2020 for details.

CRAFT WORKSHOP at the Friedman Branch Library July 16.

Held at 10 a.m. for children 4-6 years of age and 11 a.m. for those 7-9 years of age. Registration is required; call 736-6758.

STORYTIME WITH JULIA HARDING July 15 at the Friedman Branch Library. Storytime is 10:05 a.m. for preschoolers and 10:30 a.m. for school-age children. 736-6758.

CREATIVE IMPRESSIONS’ SUMMER MUSIC WORKSHOP for youth ages 8-15 who are interested in music, dance and per formance. Held July 14-25 at St. Alban’s Episcopal Church, 2321 Lumpkin Rd. Cost is $120 per child. For registration information, call Trey McLaughlin at 737-3187 or Evelyn Ellis at 733-1122.

“COTTON AND THE CANAL” FAMILY FUN DAY at the Augusta Museum of History 2 p.m. July 13. Visitors will learn about cot ton, the canal and mill life through hands-on activities and period re-enactors. Each par ticipant will receive a pass for free admission to the Augusta Canal Interpretive Center; admission to the Museum of History is free. Call 722-8454 for more information.

“LOOKING AT LEAVES” July 9, 9-11 a.m., at Spirit Creek Educational Forest. Examine leaves and make your own leaf print. Bring pieces of 100 percent cot ton or muslin cloth or clothing to print on. Event is free. 790-2351.

CHILDREN’S STORYTIME at Borders Books and Music July 7, 11 a.m. “Dinosaurumpus” is this week’s tale. Call 7376962 for information.

FAMILY FULL MOON NATURE HIKE July 12, 9-11 p.m. at Phinizy Swamp Nature Park. Explore the park by the light of the moon and search for nocturnal animals. Bring a flashlight. Free for members, $5 for non-members. Register by July 11. 828-2109.

PHINIZY SWAMP NATURE PARK FAMILY DISCOVERY SERIES July 17, 6-7:30 p.m. Bring the family and a picnic dinner to the park’s Picnic Pavilion and enjoy a program on nature. Free; advance reservations not necessary. Call 8282109 for more information.

“THE PRINCESS AND THE PEA” will be presented by the Augusta State University Born To Read Literacy Center and Patchwork Players July 8. Shows will be held at the Ma xwell Per forming Ar ts Theatre at 9, 10 and 11 a.m. Tickets are $3 per person. For information and tickets, call 733-7043.

“CLAY TIME MACHINE” INTRODUCTORY CERAMICS WORKSHOP for youth ages 7-12 at the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t July 7-10 and 14-17. Registration required; 722-5495.

PLAY AND LEARN SPANISH July 7-18, 1:30-3:30 p.m. at

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26 M E T R O S P I R I T

4th of July Festivities

Augusta State University. Open to children in grades 6-8.

Class fee is $95. 737-1636.

WEEKLY STORY SESSIONS at all branch libraries. Visit www.ecgrl.public.lib.ga.us for more information.

GET READY FOR ALGEBR A I at Augusta State Universit y.

Ninth graders meet July 7-17 and 8th graders meet July 21-31. Both sessions held 4-5:30 p.m. and cost $75. Call 737-1636.

FIRST SATURDAY STORYTELLING at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum. In addition, there is a tour of the museum. Held 10 a.m.-noon the first Saturday of the month. Call 724-3576.

STORYTIME AT MAXWELL BRANCH LIBRARY with storyteller Jackie Johns July 9. Storytime begins at 10 a.m. Call 793-2020.

STORYTIME AT PENDLETON Thursdays throughout July, 10:30-11 a.m., at Pendleton King Park, 1600 Troupe St. Bring a blanket or chairs and meet at the gazebo. For more information, contact Kay Mills, 738-4321 or Kimberly Cooper, 821-2631.

J U L Y 3

SUMMER ADVENTURES DAY CAMP runs in sessions through Aug. 8. Cost is $90 for Sessions 1-4; Session 5 is $45. Open to kids ages 5-12. Held at the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken. Call (803) 642-7631 for information.

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SUMMER FUN DAY CAMP through Aug. 8, running in twoweek sessions, at the Smith-Hazel Recreation Center in Aiken.

Open to children ages 4-12. Cost is $60 per session; out-ofcity residents pay an additional $27.50. (803) 642-7635.

PLANETARIUM SHOWS FOR SUMMER GROUPS with special show times Wednesdays and Thursdays at the DuPont Planetarium. Reservations are required; for details, contact Janice Weeks at (803) 641-3769 or 278-1967, ex t. 3769.

MATH AND SCIENCE CAMP for students entering 3rd and 4th grades. Held July 14-18 at For t Discovery. Cost is $125 for members and $150 for non-members. Beforeand af ter-camp care available for additional fee. Contact Lisa Golden, 821-0646.

FORT GORDON’S INDEPENDENCE CELEBR ATION will be held July 3, 10 a.m.-10 p.m. on Bar ton Field. Activities include laser and fireworks display star ting at 9 p.m., a carnival, military displays and live enter tainment. Free and open to the public; all patrons must have photo ID to enter the post. Call 791-6001 for details.

AUGUSTA CHAPTER OF THE MILITARY ORDER OF WORLD WARS CEREMONY will be held on the steps of the municipal building, 530 Greene St., 10 a.m. July 4. For information, call 736-9581.

COLUMBIA COUNTY’S INDEPENDENCE DAY CELEBR ATION star ts at 6 p.m. July 4 at Patriots Park.

Call 860-2205 for more information.

COUNTRY GR AND SLAM CONCERT July 4 at Lake Olmstead Stadium. John Michael Montgomery and special guest Shannon Lawson will per form. Postconcer t fireworks are planned. Tickets are $15$20 for adults and $7.50 for kids 12 and under. For information or tickets, visit www.countrygrandslam.com or call 1-800-594-TIX X. ANNUAL WREATH-LAYING CEREMONY to honor Georgia’s signers of the Declaration of Independence. Held 10 a.m. July 4 at the Founders Monument in front of the Augusta-Richmond County municipal building. The public is invited to at tend. Call 863-2324 for info.

THUNDER OVER THURMOND events July 5 include: Market Day, 8 a.m.-noon at the Cullars Inn parking lot; Cruise-In, noon-3 p.m. on Humphrey Street; 378 Parade of Cars, 3 p.m. on U.S. 378; Shag Exhibitioin, 3:30 p.m. at Mack; and Thunder Over Thurmond Fireworks Display at dark over U.S. 378. For more information, contact the Lincolnton-Lincoln County Chamber of Commerce at 359-7970 or the McCormick County Chamber of Commerce at (864) 465-2835.

STAR-SPANGLED CONCERT July 4, 8 p.m. at Saint Paul’s Church. Tickets are $12 adult, $8 students 13 and up, $5 children 7-12 and free for children 6 and under. Patron tickets also available for $50. For more information, call 722-3463.

RIVER BLAST 2003 Four th of July celebration at Augusta Common and Riverwalk’s Eighth Street Plaza and Amphitheatre noon-9:30 p.m. July 4.

Free admission. For more information, contact Riverwalk Special Events, 821-1754.

SURF AND SAND SPECTACULAR celebration July 4 at Callaway Gardens, Resor t and Preserve in Pine Mountain, Ga. Fireworks show, Florida State University Flying High Circus, live enter tainment by the Swingin’ Medallions and more. Admission is $15 for adults and $7.50 for children 6-12; members and children 5 and under admit ted free.

Call 1-800-CALLAWAY or visit www.callawayonline.com for information.

“MARY CHESNUT’S WAR FOR INDEPENDENCE” will be per formed at the USCB Per forming Ar ts Center in Beaufor t, S.C., July 8, 7:30 p.m. Tickets are $20; $40 VIP tickets include receptions following per formance. Call (843) 521-4114.

“INDEPENDENCE DAY WITH BEN FR ANKLIN” July 4, noon-3 p.m. at Lit tle White House Historic Site in Warm Springs, Ga. Dr. Tom Wentland gives a per formance as Ben Franklin. Cost is $2-$5. For more information, call (706) 655-5870.

“BIG BANG BOOM” SUPER FIREWORKS SHOW July 4 at the Georgia National Fairgrounds and Agricenter in Perry, Ga. (478) 987-3247 or 1-800-987-3247.

FIREWORKS AND R ACING AT HARDEEVILLE MOTOR SPEEDWAY July 3 in Hardeeville, S.C. For more information, call (843) 784-RACE or visit www.hardeevillespeedway.com.

MISSION TO MARS CAMP for students entering 2nd and 3rd grades. Held July 7-11 at For t Discovery. Cost is $125 for members and $150 for non-members. Before- and af ter-camp care available for additional fee. Contact Lisa Golden, 821-0646.

SCIENCE POTPOURRI CAMP for students entering 2nd and 3rd grades. Held July 21-25 at For t Discovery. Cost is $125 for members and $150 for non-members. Beforeand af ter-camp care available for additional fee. Contact Lisa Golden, 821-0646.

DRAW ON NATURE II CAMP offers ar t, science and technology activities to students entering 2nd and 3rd grades.

Held July 28-Aug. 1 at For t Discovery. Cost is $125 for members and $150 for non-members. Before- and af tercamp care available for additional fee. Contact Lisa Golden, 821-0646.

FAMILY Y SUMMER CAMPS offer a variety of traditional and special interest camps for children 4-17 years old. For specifics, call 733-1030, 738-6678, 738-6680 or 364-3269.

“SUMMER OF FUN” DAY CAMPS through August at Riverview Park in Nor th Augusta. Themed one-week sessions will be offered, including ar t camp, magic camp, music camp, Spanish camp, inventor’s camp and science camp.

Cost is $100 per session. For information, call 667-8806.

SUMMER VACATION READING PROGRAM at all East Central Georgia Regional Libraries through July 25. Children who complete 20 books or read for 10 hours over the summer receive a pack of summer time treats. Obtain a reading folder at any of the libraries or call Headquar ters Library at 821-2600 for details.

“EVERY CHILD AN ARTIST” SUMMER ART CAMP, presented by the Gertrude Herbert Institute of Art. Weeklong sessions run throughout July in locations downtown and in Columbia County. Open to children ages 5-14. Per-session cost is $50 for GHIA members and $65 for non-members; tuition assistance is also available. For information, call 722-5495.

KENNY THOMAS BASEBALL CAMP for kids 5-14 years old at USC-Aiken July 21-25, 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Early drop-off and late pick-up also available. Cost is $160 per session. Call (803) 642-7761 for details.

GIBBS LIBRARY SUMMER STORYTIME REGISTRATION now open. Call 863-1946 for more information or to register your child.

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STORYLAND THEATRE is now taking reservations for the 2003-2004 season: “Sleeping Beauty” Oct. 28-Nov. 1, “The Cour tship of Senorita Florabella” Feb. 24-29 and “Hansel and Gretel” April 13-17. Season tickets for weekday school per formances are $9 per student; season tickets for weekend family matinees are $10.50 per person. For reservations, call Storyland Theatre at 736-3455 or fa x a request to 736-3349.

YOUTH LEADERSHIP DEVELOPMENT SKILLS PROGRAM for teens ages 12-19 held the third Saturday of the month at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History. Call 724-3576.

Seniors LUCY CRAFT LANEY MUSEUM OF BLACK HISTORY JULY SENIOR LUNCHEON 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. July 9. Saudia Lawton will discuss her studies in ar t history. Luncheon held at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History Conference Room. Cost is $6 per person. Please contact Kelvin Jackson at 724-3576 to reserve a place.

FIT 4 EVER LIGHT IMPACT FITNESS CLASS is $25 for 12 tickets for Aiken city residents and $45 for all others.

Classes are held at the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, 10-11 a.m. Call (803) 642-7631 for information.

THE CARE MANAGEMENT CONSULTANT COMPANY, a nonprofit organization, provides transpor tation for seniors who live in the 30906 and 30815 zip code area. For a minimal fee, door-to-door shut tles provide safe, clean and dependable transpor tation 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Appointments must be made 24 hours in advance; call Linda Washington, 7338771, or leave a message for more information.

COMPUTER CLASSES FOR SENIOR CITIZENS Tuesdays and Thursdays, 11 a.m.-1 p.m. at Shiloh Comprehensive Community Center. For more information, call 738-0089.

AIKEN PARKS AND RECREATION offers a multitude of programs for senior adults, including bridge clubs, fitness classes, canasta clubs, line dancing, racquetball, ar ts and craf ts, tennis and excursions. For more information, call (803) 642-7631.

JUD C. HICKEY CENTER FOR ALZHEIMER’S CARE provides families and caregivers of those with Alzheimer’s disease and dementia a break during the day. Activities and care available at the adult day center, and homecare is available as well. For information, call 738-5039.

THE ACADEMY FOR LIFELONG LEARNING offers lectures, courses, field trips, discussion groups and community information seminars on a variety of topics to mature adults. For more information, contact the USC-Aiken Office of Continuing Education at (803) 641-3288.

THE SENIOR CITIZENS COUNCIL OF GREATER AUGUSTA AND THE CSRA offers a variety of classes, including aerobics, quilting, tai chi, Spanish, painting, line dancing, bowling, bridge, computers, pilates and pinochle. For dates and times, phone 826-4480.

SENIORNET provides adults age 50 and over education for and access to computer technology. Many different courses are offered. Contact the USC-Aiken Continuing Education Office at (803) 641-3563.

Sports OPEN BASS TOURNAMENT July 12 at the Dorn Boating and Fishing Facility in McCormick, S.C. Call the McCormick County Chamber of Commerce at (864) 465-2835 for more information.

TST SOCCER CAMP will be held at Citizens Park in Aiken July 14-18, 9 a.m.-noon. Open to players 5-16 years of age.

Call (803) 642-7761 for more information.

SOFTBALL LEAGUE ORGANIZATIONAL MEETING July 15, 6:30 p.m., at Citizens Park 2 in Aiken. The league is co-ed and open to players 16 and older. Call (803) 642-7761 for more information.

TENNIS CAMP at the H.O. Weeks Tennis Center July 14-18, 9 a.m.-noon. Camp is open to beginner and experienced athletes between 6-18 years of age. The cost is $65 per session. Call (803) 642-7739.

NIKE AAU PEACHJAM BASKETBALL TOURNAMENT July 14-17 at the Riverview Park Activities Center in Nor th Augusta. Call (803) 441-4311 for information.

FAMILY Y FALL SOCCER REGISTRATION: Wheeler Branch registration is July 7-19 for children 4-13 years old as of Aug. 1, 2003, 738-6678; Marshall Branch registration July 7-Aug. 2 for children 4-5 years old as of Aug. 1, 2003, 3643269; Southside Branch registration Aug. 18-29 for children 4-5 years old as of Aug. 1, 738-6680.

FALL SOCCER REGISTRATION July 7-14 at Citizens Park Complex II in Aiken. Girls and co-ed leagues for children ages 518 as of Sept. 1, 2003. Cost is $40 for the first child and $35 for each additional child. Additional $27.50 fee per child for those

AUGUSTA ROWING CLUB JUNIOR SCULLING CAMPS July 8-12. Open to those age 14-18. Call 738-3991 for registration information.

SWIMMING LESSONS at the Smith-Hazel Pool in Aiken.

Instructors will teach people of all skill levels how to swim; open to ages 2 through adult. Morning and evening classes available, and lessons run in two-week sessions JuneAugust. Cost is $30 per session. (803) 642-7631.

AUGUSTA-RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL: New volunteer orientation is scheduled the first Saturday of each month at 1 p.m. at the shelter, 4164 Mack Lane. Schedule subject to change; call 790-6836 to verify dates and times.

SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER is seeking donors to prevent a blood supply shor tage. To donate call 737-4551, 854-1880 or (803) 643-7996.

Meetings

SUMMER SWIM LESSONS offered in two-week sessions through July 31 at the Family Y pools. Classes available for six month olds through adults. Call 738-6678, 733-1030 or 738-6680 for details.

“SUCCESS COLUMBIA COUNTY STYLE” after-hours business event July 4, 5-7 p.m. at First National Bank and Trust in Martinez. For more information, contact Terra Jones, 651-0018.

AUGUSTA GREENJACKETS HOME GAMES July 9-11, 15-17 and 24-26. Tickets are $6-$8 for adults; $5 for senior citizens, military personnel and children 4-12; and $1 for children 3 and under. For tickets, visit www.tixonline.com or call 736-7889.

WOMEN IN BUSINESS MEETING July 15, 11:30 a.m., with speaker Janet Hicks. Held at Pullmann Hall. Cost is $12 preregistered by July 11 or $15 at the door for Augusta Metro Chamber of Commerce members and $15 pre-registered by July 11 or $18 at the door for non-members. For information, call the Chamber of Commerce at 821-1300.

INTRODUCTORY AND DROP-IN CLIMBING Fridays, 5:306:30 p.m., at the Virginia Acres Park Climbing Wall in Aiken.

Cost is $5 per session. Call (803) 642-7631 for information.

THE AUGUSTA RUGBY CLUB is always looking for new members. Teams available for women and men; no experience necessary. Practice is Tuesday and Thursday nights, 79 p.m. at Richmond Academy. For more information, call Don Zuehlke, 495-2043, or e-mail augustar fc@yahoo.com.

You may also visit www.augustarugby.org.

Volunteer THE LIBRARY OF CONGRESS VETERANS HISTORY PROJECT is in need of Georgia veterans from World War I, World War II and the Korean, Vietnam and Persian Gulf Wars, as well as the civilians who suppor ted them on the home front, to share their stories. The project is an ongoing effor t to collect as many oral histories as possible to share with future generations. For more information, call 1-888-371-5848 or visit www.loc.gov/vets.

THE AUGUSTA CHAPTER OF THE AMERICAN SINGLES GOLF ASSOCIATION meets the second Thursday of every month at different restaurants in the Augusta area. There is no charge for the meeting, but attendees are responsible for any items ordered off the menu. The group also sponsors golf outings and socials. Open to those who are single and 21 and over.

For information and meeting location, call (803) 441-6741.

THE KITTY ORTIZ DE LEON FOUNDATION needs volunteers to help promote organ donor awareness. For more information, please contact Cassandra Reed at 481-0105 or kodfoundation@aol.com.

GOLDEN HARVEST FOOD BANK needs volunteers during the day, Monday-Friday, to help sort donated products and assist in their agency shopping area. Help is needed year-round. If you are able to lift 25 pounds and would like to help fight hunger in the Augusta area, contact Laurie Roper at 736-1199, ext. 208.

THOROUGHBRED RACING HALL OF FAME DOCENT TRAINING DAYS to be held July 21 and Aug. 11. Duties include opening and closing the Hall of Fame, greeting visitors and providing information about museum exhibits. Call Lisa Hall, (803) 642-7650 for information.

Thursday, July 10 Join us for some downhome bluegrass!

Admission is Free • 7:00pm Creighton Living History Park (corner of Spring Grove and Lake Avenues)

2856 Washington Rd. 73-STEAK 1654 Gordon Hwy. 796-1875

Support for Music in the Park 2003 is generously provided by the North Augusta Riverfront Co., LLC. For more information call 803-442-7588 or email artsna@mindspring.com

NAR-ANON FAMILY GROUP for relatives and friends of drug abusers. No dues or fees. The group meets Mondays at 7 p.m. in Room 430 of the Summerville Building beside St. Joseph’s Hospital. For information, contact Kathy, 6500947, or Josie, 414-5576.

NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS: If you want to stop using any drugs, there is a way out. Help is available at no cost. Call the Narcotics Anonymous help line for information and meeting schedules at 855-2419.

WORLD HERITAGE FOREIGN EXCHANGE PROGRAM is looking for area families, couples and single parents to host high-school-aged foreign exchange students for a semester or a year in the U.S. For more information, visit www.world-heritage.org or contact Beth Folland, (803) 279-2696 or 1-800-888-9040.

In Concert

1987-2002

Weekly

THE SAVANNAH RIVER SITE CITIZENS ADVISORY BOARD is looking for interested Georgia and South Carolina citizens to run for membership in 2004-2005. Board membership requires a 10-15 hour per month time commitment and active par ticipation on one or more issues-based committees. Female applicants are especially needed. Call 1-800249-8155 for a packet.

CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY NEW VOLUNTEER ORIENTATION PROGRAM the third Saturday of every month at the Pet Center, 425 Wood St. Orientation star ts at 11 a.m. Volunteers under 18 years of age must have a parent or guardian present during orientation and while volunteering. Call 261-PETS for information.

Split Rail

“A COURSE IN MIRACLES” DISCUSSION GROUP meets Wednesdays, 7 p.m., at Christ Church Unity to explore writings on spirituality and inner peace. Call 738-2458.

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS: For more information and a meeting schedule, call 860-8331.

COURT APPOINTED SPECIAL ADVOCATE PROGRAM VOLUNTEER TRAINING: The CASA program is looking for volunteers 21 years of age and older to advocate for abused and neglected children in the juvenile cour t system. Volunteers need no experience and will be provided with specialized training. Call 737-4631.

Voted Best Steak In Augusta For 15 Years

North Augusta Cultural Arts Council presents

THE AUGUSTA GENEALOGICAL SOCIETY meets July 3, 7-8 p.m., at the Augusta Museum of History with an Ask the Exper ts session, “What’s Stumping You?” Free. For more information, contact Carol Allen Storm, 592-2711.

SOUTHERNCARE HOSPICE SERVICE is currently seeking volunteers to per form a variety of tasks, including relieving caregivers, reading to patients and running errands. Training is included. For additional information, contact Lisa Simpson, (803) 463-9888 or 869-0205.

PROJECT LINUS DAY July 16, 10 a.m.-2 p.m., at the Warren Baptist Church Field House. Project Linus provides handknit, crocheted or quilted blankets to children in need. For more information, call the Augusta Area Chapter of Project Linus at 736-4330.

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who are not residents of the city of Aiken. (803) 642-7761.

OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS meets Tuesdays, 6-7:30 p.m.

Call 785-0006 for location and information.

CHRIST-BASED RECOVERY MEETING every Tuesday, 6:30 p.m., at the Love & Light Healing Center. Please use the back entrance. For information, contact Kenny Stacy, 373-5585.

Mobile Veterinary Service

FREE ‘N’ ONE SUPPORT GROUP for those bat tling addiction to drugs and alcohol. Approach is a spiritual one.

Held ever y Thursday night. For information, contact Sarah Barnes, 772-7325.

TOUGH LOVE SUPPORT GROUP Monday nights, 6:30-7:30 p.m. at the South Augusta Resource Center. Learn how to understand addiction and how to exercise tough love with those you care about. Call Sarah Barnes, 772-7325, for info.

GEORGIA-CAROLINA TOASTMASTERS meets Wednesdays at noon at the Clubhouse, 2567 Washington Rd. $8 for lunch; visitors welcome. 860-9854.

SEXAHOLICS ANONYMOUS, a 12-step program of recovery from addiction to obsessive/compulsive sexual thoughts and behaviors, meets Wednesdays at 8 p.m. and Saturdays at 7 p.m. at Augusta Counselling Services. Call 339-1204 and leave first name and phone number; a confidential reply is assured.

AUGUSTA TOASTMASTERS CLUB #326 meets Thursdays at 7:30 p.m. at Advent Lutheran Church. Call 868-8431.

“Housecalls For Pets” Vaccinations • Surgery • Dentistry • Senior Care Wellness & Preventative Care • Microchip Identification Home Delivery of Prescription Medications & Diets Heartworm Prevention • Flea & Tick Control Products

BUSINESS NETWORK INTERNATIONAL Augusta Chapter meets every Thursday morning from 7 to 8:30 a.m. at the Cour tyards by Mariott. The group is a business networking group designed to give and receive referrals. All professionals welcome. For more information or to join, call Barbara Crenshaw, 868-3772.

RIVERWALK TOASTMASTERS meets Mondays, 7 p.m. in Classroom 3 at University Hospital. Call Gale Kan, 855-7071.

GUIDELINES: Public Service announcements are listed in this section without charge at the discretion of the editor.

Announcements must be received by Monday at noon and will be included as space permits. Send to Events, The Metropolitan Spirit, P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914 or fax (706) 7336663. You may also e-mail listings to rhonda.jones@metrospirit.com or lisa.jordan@metrospirit.com. Listings cannot be taken over the phone.

Debra J. Saul, D.V.M. 706-860-4884 Bringing 19 Years of Experience To Your Door

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28 M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 3 2 0 0 3

Arts: Theatre

A Man and His Theatre

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t the end of a long and winding road – an hour and a half from Augusta – is the charming town square of Abbeville, S.C. That town square is the home of a beautiful venue kept in pristine condition by the town that loves it and a director who should by all rights be chasing his star in New York, Los Angeles – or Atlanta, at the very least.

So how did the two of them wind up in a little town like Abbeville? Director Michael Genevie, who once upon a time went up against attorney Ben Matlock on a weekly basis as the television show’s district attorney with no name, explained the situation that gave rise to the construction of the theatre that drew him to Abbeville. And my what a situation it was.

At the turn of the century, he said, when shows closed in New York, they would wind up in Atlanta, but to get to Atlanta, they had to pass through Abbeville. Eventually, the town got together and decided that, if they built a New York-style venue, it would be possible to make New York shows available to the locals without requiring them to go to Atlanta. So they got in touch with their contacts in the New York theatre world who provided them with the proper floor plans. The Abbeville Opera House was born soon after.

In 1908, after eight years of construction, the opera house threw wide its doors to the public.

“They would come through Abbeville on Wednesday and it became such a big deal back then, the community would wait for them on the square. … Everything shut down Wednesday afternoons.” Then, he said, they would perform Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights.

The local paper, The Press and Banner, came out on Wednesday with a front-page review of the previous week’s performance and a photo of the current week’s. That lasted, he said, all the way through the 1920s and ‘30s. “Ben Hur” was one production that ran there, and it used live horses for the chariot scene.

Plenty of westerns played there in those days. “They used to have one-reelers,” he said. First the star – famous cowboy Lash Laroo was one of them – would give a 20minute live show onstage before introducing his latest film. That lasted through the ‘50s, but then interest waned and the town almost tore the old theatre down, Genevie said.

“Until in 1968, the county decided to get together and restore the opera house into its original condition,” Genevie said. Soon after, the Abbeville community theatre was born.

Then, in 1978, the summer season opened, and the company soon realized that a summer program would not be able to survive based solely on the goodwill of volunteers. So they went looking for a professional, and they found Genevie.

He owned a professional touring company called Creative Enterprises. The Abbeville folks had seen some of their work and decid-

By Rhonda Jones

ed to enlist their help creating a summer stock program. So Genevie and his crew agreed to visit the opera house.

“We came in and fell in love with the space,” he said.

It is a beautiful venue, with plush red seats installed in the ‘60s and boxes on either side of the stage made to look as though they were part of someone’s drawing room. That was 1979. Genevie’s plans did not go quite as expected.

“We came in with a two-play summer season just to see what the response would be,” Genevie said. The response caused him to plan a 10-play season for 1980 – 10 weeks of theatre.

After six or seven years of that, he said, Abbeville asked him to stay through the year.

He went ahead and moved to Abbeville, but still had two years worth of Creative Enterprises contracts to honor. After that, the company dissolved and Genevie gave himself to Abbeville full-time.

But Creative Enterprises still lives on in a way, even though the corporation officially dissolved, because some of the actors who go to Abbeville for the summer were the ones who had worked with the company.

He uses professional actors in the summer, some of them on their vacations from soap opera jobs, like Ron Hale, who has worked on both “General Hospital” and “Ryan’s Hope.”

For that reason, he said, the rehearsal time for the Abbeville summer stock is the shortest of the year – five days.

It helps, he said, that many of the actors have plenty of experience working on television shows or films, and are therefore adept at quick memorization after lastminute script revisions. And, he added, they receive their scripts in April and, being the professionals that they are, have already learned their lines and gotten to know their characters.

As for himself, Genevie has an impressive list of credits to his own name, but he didn’t really begin working on that until about 12 years ago, when his daughter was born, so that he could get more benefits through the Screen Actors Guild, he said.

His resume claims over 75 roles in films, television series and movies of the week: In addition to playing the district attorney on “Matlock,” Genevie transformed himself into Ron Dubois and Glen Wattle on “In the Heat of the Night,” Dr. Portis Fields on “American Gothic,” Winset Carter on “I’ll Fly Away,” a police officer on “Days of Our Lives,” a cop

Left: Michael Genevie. Right: Abbeville Opera House.

in “That Darn Cat,” and a prison guard in “My Cousin Vinny.”

In fact, he said, they rewrote the part of Glen Wattle for him.

He didn’t know much about Mr. Wattle when he went in to his “In the Heat of the Night” audition, so he donned some bad prosthetic teeth and played him in a way that the writers hadn’t exactly intended.

“I went in as this good ol’ redneck murdering guy,” he said. When he got a copy of the script, and the character specs, he saw that Wattle was to be a “tall, thin, blond man.”

“I thought, ‘What am I doing here?’”

The casting director, however, loved Genevie’s approach, so he got the part.

So how in the world, one might wonder, does a man carry on an onscreen career from Abbeville, S.C.? At one time, he said, that would have been unheard of. But the

Southeast began growing a crop of production companies that were able to put such programs as “In the Heat of the Night” and “American Gothic” out into the national market, enabling Genevie to gain screen jobs while keeping his day job at Abbeville.

Right now, though, the most important thing in his career is the play he’s currently preparing for, the Abbeville production of Neil Simon’s “Rumors”: A couple are supposed to be enjoying their 10th anniversary with friends, but something is amiss. One has apparently tried to shoot himself in the head and the other is missing. The first couple to arrive at the party try to keep this from the others, and comedy ensues when people start losing track of the lies.

The show runs July 11-12, 18-19 and 25-26.

For ticket information and showtimes call the box office at (864) 459-2157. For more information about the opera house itself, visit http://www.emeraldis.com/abbeville/history/o perahouse.

30 M E T R O S P I R I T

Arts: Exhibit

Athens Historical and Art Exhibit Provides Window to Another Time

By Rhonda Jones

J U L Y 3 2 0 0 3

“John Quincy Adams,” 1816, by Charles Robert Leslie; oil on canvas; 37 by 29 inches. “View of Boston Harbor,” 1852, by Fitz Hugh Lane; Oil on canvas; 22 1/2 by 34 3/4 inches.

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rt exhibits have fanciful names.

Art exhibits have philosophical names. Art exhibits are arranged by people who think in existential terms. Art exhibits are arranged by people who have a cloud of fairy dust around their heads.

Not this art exhibit.

“Becoming a Nation: Americana From the Diplomatic Reception Rooms, U.S. Department of State,” was arranged by the Trust for Museum Exhibitions and the U.S. Department of State. Though those titles may leave a deceptively dry taste in your mouth, the organizations involved have actually put together an exhibition of really cool stuff that will take you on a trip through time.

The Artists Did you know that Paul Revere was an artist? Yep. The guy you learned about in grammar school did more than just hop on his pony and shout, “The British are coming!” He was an artisan, actually – a silversmith and an engraver. And, unbeknownst to him, he has work in an exhibit at the Georgia Museum of Art. He learned the silver trade from his father and took over the family business at the age of 24. He did well at it and became one of the best artisans in Boston.

Being the political activist that he was, he engraved political cartoons for the cause of American independence.

On a side note, here’s a little fun-fact: Silver items weren’t all he made. He had two wives, consecutively, by which he had eight children apiece. Not surprising-

ly, he outlived them both.

Portrait artist John Singleton Copley, who painted a famous portrait of Revere, will also be featured in the exhibit. Like Revere, he was born in Boston, and learned a great deal about his trade from his family.

His paintings are particularly good pieces to include in a historical exhibit like this one because he posed his subjects in front of objects particular to their time: books, guns, furniture and draperies. His subjects tended to be historically important as well: John Adams, Samuel Adams and John Hancock, to name a few.

Copley was born of Irish immigrants, and was highly influenced by his stepfather, an engraver named John Smibert, and by Joseph Blackburn, whom he met at the age of 15, and whose use of rococo techniques he admired.

Eventually, he left for London, where he stayed for the remainder of his days and delved into other styles of art. He died in 1815.

For an online tour of his work, visit http://www.nga.gov/collection/gallery and perform a “search by name.” In fact, you can see some of Paul Revere’s engravings there as well.

Other favorites of American art and artisan history to be represented by their works will be Nathaniel Austin, Charles Wilson Peale, Duncan Phyfe, John Bankson and Richard Lawson.

As you may have noticed, though there will be some paintings in this exhibit, they don’t seem to be in the majority. “(It’s) mostly furniture,” said Michelle

Stancil of the Georgia Museum of Art. “But there’s also going to be some porcelain and some silver.”

The Collection The collection, according to materials provided by the Georgia Museum of Art, was begun in 1950 in an effort to spruce up the Department of State. (Apparently, they had some ugly little rooms they wanted to bring to life.) Thirty years later, the government’s mission – a quest for beauty, believe it or not – was complete, and resulted in a set of historically accurate rooms that made great places for chatting with foreign dignitaries.

Here are a few of the 160 pieces in the exhibit.

Severin Roesen (1815-72) leaves behind “A Two-Tiered Still Life With Fruit (‘Nature’s Bounty’),” which he created sometime after 1852. It is an oil on canvas, mounted on masonite. Apparently, it was his habit to use two-tiered marble tabletops as mounts for his paintings. He also tended to underline his signature with the tendril of a vine.

Charles Robert Leslie (1794-1859) leaves a portrait of John Quincy Adams, painted in 1816 as an oil on canvas. He did not paint Adams during his presidency, however, but during Adams’ time as America’s minister to Great Britain.

Leslie was 22 at the time, and won 14 sittings from Adams.

Fitz Hugh Lane (1804-65) leaves behind the oil on canvas, “View of Boston Harbor,” which he painted in 1852. It’s a dramatic, though not particularly stormy, piece, of rippling water and

darkening sky, with the sails of boats providing a ghostly contrast against the blue and the grey.

Among the decorative arts is a china table attributed to Robert Harrold, who worked from 1765-92. It represents a shift in artistic sensibilities from Baroque to English Rococo. There is also a seven-piece coffee and tea service from John LeTellier, a sideboard attributed to John Bankston, a high chest of drawers, and side chairs, among other pieces.

“Becoming a Nation: Americana From the Diplomatic Reception Rooms, U.S. Department of State,” will run from July 5 to Aug. 31. Museum hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Tuesday through Saturday; 10 a.m. to 9 p.m. Wednesday and 1-5 p.m. on Sunday. The museum is located at the University of Georgia in Athens.

For information, call (706) 542-4662 or visit www.uga.edu/gamuseum.

On July 10-11, there will be a collectors silent auction and open reception for the summer exhibitions. From 10 to 5, there will be a public preview of the silent auction at the Ed and Phoebe Forio Studio classroom. Then, on July 11, which is a Friday, the silent auction will commence with a cocktail buffet at 7:30 p.m. At 8 p.m., there will be a ribbon-cutting for “Becoming a Nation,” and at 9 p.m. the auction will close. Tickets for the auction and related festivities are $35 for friends and members, $45 for non-members.

Phone (706) 542-0830 to reserve by credit card. Or you may send a check, payable to the UGA Foundation, to Friends of the Museum, 90 Carlton Street, Athens, Ga., 30602.

Cinema

31

“Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle”

M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y

Movie Listings Anger Management (PG-13) — Af ter "assaulting" a stewardess on a flight, doofy Dave (Adam Sandler) is ordered by a cour t into anger therapy. That means bonding with Buddy (Jack Nicholson), anger management guru, and time with Buddy's pet circle of hair-trigger loons, including Luis Guzman as a gay par ty beast and John Tur turro as a rage-aholic called Chuck. Buddy and Dave get in each other's hair, play mean pranks on each other, trade frat-level penis jokes, run up to Boston, and return to New York, where both seem to have something going with Dave's girlfriend (Marisa Tomei). "Anger Management" is not bad enough to make you angry, because inevitably the cast cooks up some silly fun. Cast: Jack Nicholson, Adam Sandler, John Tur turro, Marisa Tomei, Luis Guzman, Woody Harrelson. Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Bringing Down the House (PG-13) — Queen Latifah smoothly pockets "Bringing Down the House" as Charlene, a good-hear ted fugitive from the law, turning to a starchy, divorced ta x at torney for refuge and suppor t. Steve Mar tin is the lawyer, Peter. The core idea of this very simple comedy is pure buzz of contrast: Latifah is abundantly, explosively black, while Mar tin may be the whitest man ever to star in movies. Latifah rides out the nonsense in her queenly, Pearl Bailey style. It's a cookie-cut comedy. The movie delivers its very manufactured goods, but it lacks the guts to be a meaningful comedy. Cast: Steve Mar tin, Queen Latifah, Eugene Levy, Joan Plowright, Jean Smar t, Bet ty White. Running time: 1 hr., 45 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Bruce Almighty (PG-13) — Jim Carrey is Bruce, the goofy features repor ter on a TV station in Buf falo.

He aspires to become a "serious" anchor, but af ter blowing his cool on the air, loses his job and has a rif t with his sweet, please-marry-me girlfriend (Jennifer Aniston). There cometh unto Buf falo the Almighty (Morgan Freeman). The Lord loans his powers to

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Bruce. Time for some payback, some wild stunts, some sexual dazzling of Aniston, some nudges of satire. Like Mel Brooks as Moses in "History of the World, Par t I," Carrey has climbed the comical Mount Sinai and, like Brooks, he has dropped a tablet on the way down. One of the pieces is "Bruce Almighty."

Cast: Jim Carrey, Morgan Freeman, Jennifer Aniston, Philip Baker Hall, Catherine Bell. Running time: 1 hr., 45 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Bulletproof Monk (PG-13) — Pit y poor Chow Yun-Fat. Af ter making a string of forget table movies such as "The Replacement Killers" and "Anna and the King," it appeared he had finally hit his stride with 2000's "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." His newest flick, "Bulletproof Monk," unfor tunately, is a major step back ward. Chow stars as the "Monk With No Name" and is charged with protecting a scroll of unbelievable power. If the scroll falls into the wrong hands, it could mean the end of the world as we know it. And of course, the scroll is being pursued by Stern – a Nazi who wants to shape the world in his image.

All of this, of course, leads to a final showdown bet ween the Monk and the Nazi. If you have to ask who'll win, then you haven't seen too many of these so-called action films. Cast: Chow Yun-Fat, Seann William Scot t, Jaime King, Karel Roden, Victoria Smur fit. Running time: 1 hr., 44 mins. ★★

Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle (PG-13) —

is a dodo begging for ex tinction. Cameron Diaz, Drew Barrymore and Lucy Liu reprise their 2000 updates on the old TV espionage cuties, again combining macho girl brass and "shake your booty" allure. The plot involves impor tant high-tech rings. The buf f, jived angels race dir t bikes. There is a naughty nuns bit, set to music from "The Sound of Music," and a "Dir ty Dancing" jam of pumpin' rumps. Stupefying is a violent showdown at L.A.'s Grif fith Observatory. This dizzy spree of self-adoring ideas ends with out takes of the

cast laughing dementedly, wild with surplus merriment.

The term "go, girl" grinds to a halt. Cast: Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz, Lucy Liu, Demi Moore, Bernie Mac, Crispin Glover, Luke Wilson, John Cleese.

Running time: 1 hr., 42 mins. (Elliot t) 0

The Crocodile Hunter: Collision Course (PG) — Steve "The Crocodile Hunter " Irwin and wife

Terri dance circles around inept government agents and cuddle flesh-eating crocodiles. When the highenergy hosts of the hit wildlife series "The Crocodile Hunter " are accused of stealing a fallen U.S. spy satellite, they bat tle two silly CIA agents in an Outback adventure. Forget the common sense, but if you toss in the bot tle-sucking joey kangaroo cameo, this lite comedy is a close second to family bonding at the zoo. 1 hr, 27 mins. (Diamond) ★★1/2 Digimon (PG) — Digital monsters (or digimon) hatch from computerized eggs that pop out of users’ floppy drives. They come out cute, but soon morph into awesome and large creatures; when a computer virus infects the digimon, they morph once again into data-eating creatures, ravenous for impor tant files.

Their owners must work together to vanquish the virus and restore the world’s valuable information, teaching young moviegoers the value of teamwork and making a dif ference in the world. Cast: Jef f Nimoy, Lara Jill Miller, Joshua Seth, Bob Pappenbrook. Running time: 1 hr., 20 mins.

Down With Love (PG-13) — is a fizzy, but also grinding comedy done as pious homage to the Ike/JFK-era stuf f starring Rock Hudson and Doris Day. It's a theme park of mar tinis and smokes, with nods to "Pillow Talk," Kennedy and Ed Sullivan, "bold" (for '62) sex talk, and a brash, but cupcakey heroine — the film seems intended for women who want a feminized (but only falsely feminist) Rat Pack picture. Renee Zellweger is Barbara, a per t lassie from Maine who storms New York with her book, "Down With Love," a

ditzy manifesto for women to liberate themselves by opting for chocolates and "a la car te sex." But Barbara is really just angling for her dream wolf, the magazine hotshot and "man about town" Catcher Block (Ewan McGregor). What's so tiring about "Down With Love" is that it feels pointless. Cast: Renee Zellweger, Ewan McGregor, Sarah Paulson, David Hyde Pierce, Tony Randall. Running time: 1 hr., 36 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Final Destination 2 (R) — As in the first movie, a group of teen-agers manages to cheat death. But death, unsatisfied with the teens’ getaway, pursues in a myriad of disturbing ways. Kimberly, driving a group of friends to Florida, has a premonition that helps them avoid being caught in a fatal freeway pileup. Death has other plans. Cast: Ali Lar ter, A.J. Cook, Michael Landes, T.C. Carson, Jonathan Cherr y, James Kirk, Tony Todd.

Finding Nemo (G) — A father clown fish (Alber t Brooks) tracks young son Nemo through the Pacific to Sydney, Australia, af ter the small fry is caught and sold for a fish tank. Ellen DeGeneres voices adorable Dory, who is very pret ty and helpful as Marlin's search mate. The humans are alien invaders, big and nearly thoughtless. If "Finding Nemo" is just another of our plex distractions, then it's a giddy bummer, but as a whimsical warning with bite it arrives just in time.

Helping to make the seas a lasting realm for real Nemos could be the good, giving backwash of "Finding Nemo." Cast: Alber t Brooks, Ellen DeGeneres, Alexander Gould, Willem Dafoe, Austin Pendleton, Vicki Lewis, Geof frey Rush, Barry Humphries. Running time: 1 hr., 41 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★★ Head of State (PG-13) — “Head of State” marks the directorial debut of comic Chris Rock, who also co-wrote the screenplay. He stars as an unlikely presidential candidate, a down-on-his-luck government

“Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas”

MGM/UA Pictures

DreamWorks Pictures

“Legally Blonde 2”

RATINGS

★★★★ — Excellent.

★★★— Worthy.

★★ — Mixed.

★ — Poor.

0— Not worthy.

continued on page 32

M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 3 2 0 0 3

employee about to lose his job. Thrust into presidential candidacy by his par ty when the par ty’s original presidential nominee unexpectedly dies, Rock appeals to the country’s par ty vein to try and win the election.

Bernie Mac stars as his brother and running mate.

Cast: Chris Rock, Bernie Mac, Dylan Baker, Tamala Jones, Robin Givens.

Holes (PG) — Adapted by Louis Sachar from his highly successful novel, "Holes" has a thick shellac of literary fidelity — Sachar trying to tuck his book elements into one of the quirkiest movies Disney has ever released. "Holes" is mostly set in a juvenile detention camp in the deser t. Teen boys are made to dig big holes to find a legendary Old West crime treasure, coveted by the whip-voiced warden (Sigourney Weaver), her yokel henchman called Mr. Sir (Jon Voight) and their prissy assistant (Tim Blake Nelson).

The new boy on the digging detail is Stanley Yelnats.

Director Andrew Davis, so sure with the tensions of "Under Siege" and "The Fugitive," is amiably sweating this assignment. His tone veers of f on fishing expeditions, sly humor and pathos casting their baited lines nex t to teen terror and prat falling hokum. My kids liked it somewhat more than I did, which probably sums up the movie about as well as any thing should. Cast: Jon Voight, Sigourney Weaver, Shia LaBeouf, Khleo Thomas, Tim Blake Nelson, Henry Winkler, Ear tha Kit t. Running time: 1 hr., 51 mins. ★★1/2

How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days (PG-13) —

should be retitled "How to Lose a Movie in 10 Minutes." The spirited opening credits are a clever visual and musical introduction to Andie Anderson (Kate Hudson) as she dashes and fumbles though research for "how-to" ar ticles published in a glitzy women's magazine. But all promise evaporates when the lame dialogue begins. Andie is destined to meet Mat thew McConaughey's womanizing adver tising executive, Ben Barry, whose major goal is snagging the world's biggest diamond account. These two upand-coming New York hot ties bump along through the contrived plot, which involves Andie's "how to lose a guy" assignment and Ben's bet with competing coworkers that he can make a woman fall in love with him — all in the same 10-day deadline. The teasers for "10 Days" tout: "One of them is lying. So is the other."

Ah, yes, the per fect date movie. Cast: Kate Hudson, Mat thew McConaughey, Adam Goldberg, Bebe Neuwir th. Running time: 1 hr., 50 mins. (Wood) ★1/2 The Hulk (PG-13) — It's excessive and too long, but with exciting macho blows away at machismo.

The nerdy, but more than sturdy scientist Bruce Banner (Eric Bana) becomes a plaintive monster, morphed by digital ef fects into a furious green giant. The Hulk doesn't merely leap tall buildings in a single bound. He springs over Wile E. Coyote canyons and falls from the upper atmosphere into San Francisco Bay and turns huge U.S. tanks into twisted toys. "The Hulk" presses on like a Wagner opera of "Fight Club."

You can end up pulverized and satisfied, whipped and wowed. Cast: Eric Bana, Jennifer Connelly, Sam Elliot t, Nick Nolte, Josh Lucas, Paul Kersey. Running time: 2 hrs., 15 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ The Italian Job (PG-13) — If you must remake "The Italian Job," the way to go is demonstrated by F. Gar y Gray's highly professional makeover. The 1969 heist was for $4 million in gold in Turin, the new one is for $35 million in gold in Venice. In place of Michael Caine as the top heister, there is Mark Wahlberg. Donald Sutherland appears with his patented aura of suave, cheek y sincerit y, yet does not linger. So the crew is planning revenge against icy sociopath and ex-par tner Steve (Ed Nor ton).

Steve has fled to Los Angeles with the loot. "The Italian Job" is the real kickof f of summer and also the best remake since "The Thomas Crown Af fair " got a delicious new lease on life. Cast: Mark Wahlberg, Charlize Theron, Donald Sutherland, Ed Nor ton, Seth Green, Jason Statham, Mos Def. Running time: 1 hr., 51 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★1/2 Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius (G) — A perky, delight ful, beautifully animated car toon frolic about the Nickelodeon kid genius with the frontal duck tail.

Jimmy, his dog and pals rescue the parents from an alien planet, riding there on a stellar theme park. It's cute in a truly engaging way. Cast: Debi Derryberry, Mar tin Shor t, Patrick Stewar t, Rob Paulsen. 1 hr. 26 min. (Elliot t) ★★★ Kangaroo Jack (PG) — Two childhood friends, Charlie (Jerry O'Connell) and Louis (Anthony Anderson), from Brooklyn are forced to deliver a mysterious envelope to Australia af ter one of them accidentally causes the police to raid a mob warehouse.

En route to the land down under, Louis peeks in the package and discovers that it contains $50,000. Af ter the guys arrive in the Outback, they accidentally run over a kangaroo. Louis decides to take pictures of the animal and even puts shades and his lucky jacket on the 'roo, which is only stunned and hops away with the jacket containing the money. Now the guys are forced to chase the animal through the Outback, or they'll have to repay the mob with their lives. The real star of "Kangaroo Jack" is the beautiful Outback. That alone may be wor th the price of admission. Or not.

Cast: Jerry O'Connell, Anthony Anderson, Estella Warren, Christopher Walken, Dyan Cannon, Mar ton Csokas. Running time: 1 hr., 30 mins. (McCormick) ★

Legally Blonde 2: Red, White and Blonde (PG-13) — “Legally Blonde 2” opens just in time to

capitalize on the July 4 holiday weekend, with its patriotic sights set on following Harvard law school graduate and at torney Elle Woods to Washington, D.C. Relocating to the city in order to get an animal rights bill passed through Congress, Woods befriends the elderly doorman of the Watergate Hotel, who gives her the heads-up on D.C.’s inner workings. Cast: Reese Witherspoon, Sally Field, Bob Newhar t, Luke Wilson, Jennifer Coolidge.

Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (PG13) — Long, violent, death-fixated, dark in tone,

heavy in heroic mood, this is a film for addicts of the series. Lit tle Frodo is marginalized as Viggo Mor tensen leads the defense of a castle from hordes of vicious scumballs, and the t wo grand beards (Ian McKellan, Christopher Lee) contend for Middle Ear th.

There's a lit tle schizo in a wispy loincloth, expressively per formed and voiced, but the almost Stone Age my thology rolls over us like layers of geology. 3 hrs. (Elliot t) ★★ Malibu’s Most Wanted (PG-13) — Brad “Brad” Gluckman ain’t no Eminem. He’s Malibu’s worst rapper, a rich white boy who thinks he has the nuances of the hip-hop lifestyle down pat. Nothing could be fur ther from the truth, and when B-rad’s embarrassing antics creep into his father’s campaign for governor of California, the family decides that some tough love might be in order. Cast: Jamie Kennedy, Blair Underwood, Ryan O’Neal, Taye Diggs.

The Matrix: Reloaded (R) — Keanu Reeves is back as Neo, empowered hero. Also, savior of the human race that was inside the cybernetic Matrix, enslaved as "cat tle," but has now fled to a life in an underground city. A blur of sci-fi and head comix cliches and "1984" gone 2003, the movie is overwhelmingly designed, but underwhelmingly imagined.

There is the Matrix and the Oracle and the Keymaker and the Architect. Humor is kept minimal, as that

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32 continued from page 31

could pop the gas balloon. The packaging is cosmic, success inevitable. Success feeds success. "The Matrix Revolutions" is set for Nov. 7. Time for Harry Pot ter and Frodo Baggins to join forces and get mad.

Cast: Keanu Reeves, Laurence Fishburne, Carrie-Anne Moss, Hugo Weaving, Jada Pinket t Smith. Running time: 2 hrs., 18 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Phone Booth (R) — Stu Shepard (Colin Farrell) fancies that he is a new-glam guy, but he is just another wannabe Sidney Falco, a publicist who dresses in yup-style display threads (markdown Italian suits and deep-color shir ts) while he pitches, schmoozes and snidely snipes at people, of ten on a cell phone.

Suddenly, he has to endure a real sniper, a mysterious psycho who calls him in the phone booth, tells him to stay there "or I will kill you," and then torments Stu with truths about his glib, weaseling life. Director Joel Schumacher pumps the nonsense avidly, using touches — smeary jumps, zooms, speed-ups, split-screen multiples — that were get ting old when MTV was only a noisy rug rat. Cast: Colin Farrell, Forest Whitaker, Katie Holmes, Radha Mitchell, Kiefer Sutherland.

Running time: 1 hr., 21 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Rugrats Go Wild (PG) — It's a synergistic cock tail, bringing together car toon figures from t wo big Nickelodeon TV shows, "Rugrats" and "The Wild Thornberr ys," for a string of gags without a plot.

Unless, as plot, you call being stranded on a deser t island that isn't really deser ted an "adventure." This TV promo gizmo and baby sit ter is an aw fully small movie, though a Nickelodeon release boasts of $100 million in tie-ins and lists nine major companies.

Voice cast: Tim Curr y, Michael Bell, Lacey Chaber t, LL Cool J, Bruce Willis. Running time: 1 hr., 24 mins. (Elliot t) ★★

Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas (PG) —

“Sinbad” is an animated adventure, following Sinbad the Sailor as he searches to clear his name for a crime commit ted by Eris, the goddess of Chaos, who has framed him. He’s also out to save pal Proteus the Shapeshif ter. In an ef for t to accomplish his goals, Sinbad sets out into Eris’ realm, meeting and challenging various monsters and serpents along the way.

Cast: Brad Pit t, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Joseph Fiennes, Michelle Pfeif fer.

Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines (R) —

The third film in the “Terminator” franchise finds Arnold

Schwarzenegger reprising his role as a power ful android. His enemy, this time, is a female cyborg, T-X. Cast: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Nick Stahl, Kristanna Loken, Claire Danes.

28 Days Later (R) — opens with berserk lab chimps being freed by perhaps crazier animal rights activists. The chimps infect the British Isles, so that London is soon deser ted except for corpses, some prowling zombies and ver y few healthy sur vivors.

Twent y-eight days af ter the chimps escape, cycle messenger Jim (Cillian Murphy) stumbles into the scared, but tough Selena (Naomi Harris). They light out for the territor y. The infected zombies, whose blood can ruin you with one well-placed drop, are ready to pounce from shadows. Inevitably the plot heads for genre midnight, with strobed lightning and ravenous gobblers and a rock score amped for madness. The posh is pulped. Cast: Cillian Murphy, Naomi Harris, Noan Huntley, Brendan Gleeson, Christopher Eccleston. Running time: 1 hr., 48 mins.

(Elliot t) ★★1/2 2 Fast 2 Furious (PG-13) — The speed par ty "2 Fast 2 Furious" is 2 silly 2 believe and 2 cliched 2 be very enter taining. 2 bad. It stars Paul Walker, back as Brian from the 2001 summer hit "The Fast and the Furious," in which he was an undercover cop and rival, then pal, of mechanic and street racer Dom (Vin Diesel). Walker gets to appear slight nex t to the big rack of torso Tyrese, cast as racer and ex-con Roman Pearce. The set ting is now Miami. The script is a chop-shop quickie with a greasy aroma of "Miami Vice." The car scenes are so heavily edited and accessorized with tech-freak dazzle that even the blasting finish collapses into a string of stunts. This film is just a motorized budget. Cast: Paul Walker, Tyrese, Cole Hauser, Eva Mendes, James Remar. Running time: 1 hr., 44 mins. (Elliot t) ★1/2 The Wild Thornberrys (PG) — Big-screen version of the animated Nickeloden series about a family who travels around the world to make nature documentaries. While in Africa, 12-year-old Eliza learns that she can speak with animals and, with their help, aims to stop a group of poachers. Cast: Lacey Chaber t, Tim Curr y, Ruper t Everet t, Flea, Lynn Redgrave, Marisa Tomei.

—Capsules compiled from movie reviews written by David Elliott, film critic for The San Diego Union-Tribune and other staff writers.

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Cinema: Review

“28 Days Later” Is Elegantly Shocking

By David Elliott

M E T R O

03 April 9, 20

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epend upon a British zombie movie to have an elegant estate home, classical statuary, sheep, “bare ruined choirs” and a mural of refined gents who pose delicately behind grotesque carnage.

“28 Days Later” opens with berserk lab chimps being freed by perhaps crazier animal rights activists. The chimps infect the British Isles, so that London is soon deserted except for corpses, some prowling zombies and a very few healthy survivors.

Twenty-eight days after the chimps escape, cycle messenger Jim (Cillian Murphy, much the apple of this camera’s eye) stumbles into the scared but tough Selena (Naomi Harris). They light out for the territory. The infected zombies, whose blood can ruin you with one well-placed drop, are ready to pounce from shadows, but London is eerily beautiful in the dawn light, its famous buildings looming above streets free of traffic.

Director Danny Boyle, who chewed modern pulp in “Trainspotting,” has used

a script by Alex Garland (source novelist of Boyle’s “The Beach”) for a fine contrast of surreal loveliness and video-shot gore. The movie is a vivid B-kick merger of “Rabid” and “Night of the Living Dead,” with the old fantasy of a nearly unpeopled Manhattan, “The World, the Flesh and the Devil.”

In this new hell realm, a real man will do anything to find good booze, a hot bath and an available, non-zom woman, which leads the survivors, including Brendan Gleeson and his daughter, to seek refuge at the lovely manor house, where the ruling brass hawk Maj. West (Christopher Eccleston) makes Alec Guinness in “Bridge on the River Kwai” seem the soul of tea-time sanity.

The shocks include a disturbingly retro, even “Mandingo,” scene of a rabid black man chained like a dog. Inevitably the plot heads for genre midnight, with strobed lightning and ravenous gobblers and a rock score amped for madness. The posh is pulped.

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MOVIE CLOCK REGAL AUGUSTA EXCHANGE 20 Movies Good 7/4 - 7/10 Terminator 3 (R) Fri-Sat: 11:30, 12:00, 1:00, 1:35, 2:00, 2:35, 3:40, 4:10, 4:40, 5:10, 6:20, 6:45, 7:15, 7:45, 8:15, 8:55, 9:20, 9:50, 10:20, 10:50, 11:30, 12:00, 12:25; Sun-Thur: 11:30, 12:00, 1:00, 1:35, 2:00, 2:35, 3:40, 4:10, 4:40, 5:10, 6:20, 6:45, 7:15, 7:45, 8:15, 8:55, 9:20, 9:50, 10:20, 10:50 Sinbad (PG) Fri-Sat: 11:25, 12:05, 1:40, 2:15, 4:00, 4:30, 6:30, 7:00, 8:45, 11:10; Sun-Thur: 11:25, 12:05, 1:40, 2:15, 4:00, 4:30, 6:30, 7:00, 8:45 Legally Blonde 2 (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:15, 12:50, 2:55, 3:25, 5:15, 5:45, 7:10, 7:40, 8:10, 9:40, 10:10, 10:40, 12:05, 12:30; Sun-Thur: 12:15, 12:50, 2:55, 3:25, 5:15, 5:45, 7:10, 7:40, 8:10, 9:40, 10:10, 10:40 Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:30, 12:50, 1:15, 3:00, 3:50, 4:20, 5:30, 6:50, 7:20, 8:00, 9:45, 10:15, 10:45, 12:15; Sun-Thur: 12:30, 12:50, 1:15, 3:00, 3:50, 4:20, 5:30, 6:50, 7:20, 8:00, 9:45, 10:15, 10:45 28 Days Later (R) 11:40, 2:15, 5:00, 7:50, 10:35 The Hulk (PG-13) 12:15, 12:25, 3:15, 3:35, 6:20, 6:40, 9:45, 9:55 Rugrats Go Wild (PG) 12:05, 2:35, 4:50 2 Fast 2 Furious (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 1:20, 4:25, 7:20, 10:00, 12:35; Sun-Thur: 1:20, 4:25, 7:20, 10:00 Finding Nemo (G) Fri-Sat: 11:20, 12:10, 1:50, 2:40, 4:20, 5:20, 7:05, 9:35, 12:00; Sun-Thur: 11:20, 12:10, 1:50, 2:40, 4:20, 5:20, 7:05, 9:35 The Italian Job (PG-13) 11:35, 2:05, 4:55, 7:55, 10:55 Bruce Almighty (PG-13) 12:40, 3:10, 5:35, 8:05, 10:30 The Matrix: Reloaded (R) Fri-Sat: 9:15, 12:20; Sun-Thur: 9:15

EVANS 12 CINEMAS Movies Good 7/3 - 7/8 Legally Blonde 2 (PG-13) 12:45, 1:45, 2:55, 3:55, 5:05, 6:15, 7:15, 8:25, 9:25 Sinbad (PG) 1:30, 2:30, 3:30, 4:30, 5:30, 6:30, 7:30, 8:30, 9:30 Terminator 3 (R) 1:15, 2:15, 4:10, 4:50, 7:00, 7:35, 9:20, 9:55 Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle (PG-13) 1:00,

2:00, 3:10, 4:25, 5:35, 6:45, 7:45, 9:00, 10:00 The Crocodile Hunter (PG) Tues: 10:30 a.m.

Digimon (G) Tues: 10:30 a.m.

The Hulk (PG-13) 1:05, 4:00, 6:50, 9:40 Rugrats Go Wild (G) 1:20, 3:20, 5:20 2 Fast 2 Furious (PG-13) 7:40, 9:50 The Wild Thornberrys (PG) Thur: 10:30 a.m.

Jimmy Neutron (G) Thur: 10:30 a.m.

Finding Nemo (G) 12:50, 3:00, 5:10, 7:20, 9:35 Bruce Almighty (PG-13) 2:25, 4:40, 6:55, 9:05

Cinema: Review

“T3” Filled With the Tired Stuff of Summer Blockbusters

By Rachel Deahl

MASTERS 7 CINEMAS Movies Good 7/3 - 7/8 Sinbad (PG) 1:10, 3:10, 5:10, 7:10, 9:10 Legally Blonde 2 (PG-13) 1:30, 3:30, 5:30, 7:30, 9:45 Terminator 3 (R) 1:00, 4:00, 7:00, 9:30 Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle (PG-13) 12:45, 3:00, 5:15, 7:20, 10:00 The Hulk (PG-13) 12:55, 3:55, 6:55, 9:40 Rugrats Go Wild (PG) 1:05, 3:05, 5:05 2 Fast 2 Furious (PG-13) 7:05, 9:20 Finding Nemo (G) 12:50, 3:10, 5:20, 7:25, 9:25

REGAL 12 CINEMAS Movies Good 7/4 - 7/10 Down With Love (PG-13) 1:00, 3:05, 5:10, 7:30, 9:45 Holes (PG) 1:20, 4:30, 7:00, 9:25 Anger Management (PG-13) 1:25, 4:35, 7:00, 9:15 Malibu’s Most Wanted (PG-13) 1:15, 3:15, 5:20, 7:45, 9:45 Phone Booth (R) 1:10, 3:10, 5:15, 7:40, 9:55 Bulletproof Monk (PG-13) 12:45, 2:50, 5:00, 7:15, 9:20 Head of State (PG-13) 12:50, 2:55, 5:00, 7:20, 9:35 How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days (PG-13) 1:30, 4:40, 7:05, 9:20 Bringing Down the House (PG-13) 1:35, 4:45, 7:10, 9:30 Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (PG-13) 12:50, 4:25, 7:50 Kangaroo Jack (PG) 1:05, 3:05, 5:10, 7:35, 9:50 Final Destination 2 (R) 12:55, 3:00, 5:05, 7:25, 9:40

Movie listings are subject to change without notice.

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hen James Cameron added the second installment to “The Terminator,” he hit upon the brilliant irony which made his man versus machine films so wonderful — Hollywood filmmaking, like the titular hard body in his films, is all about coming back over and over again. And, making true to the catch phrase which emerged from the films, Arnold did just that to save the world and earn a huge box office haul. Sadly, returning for a third helping without the guidance of Cameron behind the camera, the din of an empty cash register is the only sound that “Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines” leaves humming in the theaters.

Filling the directorial vacancy left by Cameron, Jonathan Mostow steps up to the chair. Unable to bring anything new to the story or add to the smart cinematic repartee Cameron had established, Mostow fills “T3” with the tired stuff of summer blockbusters.

The chase between the machines — which sees Arnold in hot pursuit of an upgraded enemy, now in the va-va-voom form of model Kristanna Loken — boils down to lengthy car chases and endless explosions. But, where Cameron slyly played off the notion that the machines must rely on other machines to catch the humans, Mostow doesn’t show nearly as much flair or inventiveness with the premise. Aside from the shot of a hearse that dons the logo “Valley of Peace” after transporting the good guys through a rain of bullets, Mostow doesn’t do nearly enough winking at his endeavor.

The amusing freshness of “T2” is mostly recycled in this less superior carbon copy. With most of the cast gone, save Schwarzenegger, John Connor (now played by Nick Stahl) is liv-

ing an anchorless existence. As Stahl narrates the opening scenes of the film, he explains his life as an empty one in which he constantly finds himself waiting for the apocalypse he supposedly averted in the second film.

Unwilling to commit his name to any phone directory or permanent address, he “lives off the grid.” But, because of a glitch in the matrix as it were, the judgment day is actually still on schedule. So that Connor paranoia ends up working in the savior’s favor when two terminators arrive on planet Earth, one with the job of protecting him and the other programmed to search and destroy.

With its attractive, expressionless, liquid metal foe, “T3” is very much in the vein of Cameron’s sequel. And, for the most part, the best stuff to come out of Mostow’s film is the borrowed celluloid. As Loken turns her head just so and smirks with the evil intent of a machine equipped with a blowtorch and a great figure, the wonderful template that Cameron established comes back to life. Sure it’s the same set up when the naked machines go in search of their wardrobe, but it’s still slightly enjoyable because it was so perfect the first time around.

Still, “T3” is full of hokey references to judgment day and the revolution. As John Connor, his future wife (played by a screaming Claire Danes) and the Terminator head out into the desert to get gas and load their arsenal of weapons, the sensation that this scene played out before is overwhelming.

Only now, Linda Hamilton’s muscular presence is replaced by the pale face of the awkward teen from “My So Called Life”; the switch is just one of the many tell-tale signs that the time has come to let the machines win the battle and ensure that Arnold really won’t be back.

35

Music

M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y

Three Dynamic Bands Rock Crossroads

3

Echo 7

BY LISA JORDAN

F

inger Eleven is a band that knows loud doesn’t necessarily equal powerful.

Their third, self-titled album blends tracks that pound and rock with tracks that are compelling in their quiet moments – and then there are some songs that walk the line between the two.

Though a scheduled interview with guitarist Rick Jackett didn’t go as planned, due to poor cell-phone reception in the areas the band was traveling through, their handy bio addresses the group’s dynamic sound with a quote from vocalist Scott Anderson: "We’re not ‘nümetal.’ Simple as that. We’re not heavy for the sake of being heavy.

We don’t believe in screams without melody."

The first single off the album, "Good Times," is one of those songs that delivers both screams and melody. Anderson marries his anguished vocals with the band’s driving melodies, and the result is a song that burrows into your consciousness and sticks there.

"Thousand Mile Wish," easily one of the softer tracks on the album, is built around a haunting melody steeped in the emotion expressed by the lyrics.

Finger Eleven has been a fixture in their native Canada since the mid‘90s, when they were called (yes, it’s true) the Rainbow Butt Monkeys. After their name change, the band released 1997’s "Tip," 2000’s "The Greyest of Blue Skies" and this year’s "Finger Eleven."

Fresh off touring their native land with Ozzy Osbourne, Finger Eleven comes to Crossroads in Augusta July 9 with Echo 7 and doubleDrive.

Don’t Call Them Nü-Metal, Either Echo 7, the boys from Myrtle Beach, S.C., also shun the nü-metal qualifier, instead preferring to call what they do "hard melodic rock." It’s pretty evident, then, that they are a perfect fit to tour with Finger Eleven.

The band has already gained quite

a following, and that’s impressive, considering their debut album, "One Step Away," doesn’t hit stores until July 29.

But they’ve already played with bands like Korn, Foo Fighters, 3 Doors Down, Live, Disturbed and Trust Co., not to mention gaining a spot on the Locobazooka Tour.

Atlanta Rockers Back With New Album Atlanta four-piece doubleDrive is touring in support of their new album, last April’s Roadrunner Records debut, "Blue in the Face." The title is a testament to how long the band has been waiting to release a second album, following their 1999 album on MCA Records, "1000 Yard Stare."

In between the ups and downs of preparing a new album, writing songs and growing musically, doubleDrive has had the chance to go on the road with Kid Rock, Stereomud and Sevendust.

Catch doubleDrive, Echo 7 and Finger Eleven at Crossroads July 9. For additional information on the show, call 724-4511.

Photo: Stewart Isbell

Photo: Johnathan Mannion

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Finger Eleven

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he suits at Epic Records are undoubtedly expecting a "Highway to Sales" as AC/DC has five classic discs in the stores this week. The albums, all remastered with bonus tracks and other goodies, feature both BON SCOTT and BRIAN JOHNSON versions of the band. "'74 Jailbreak," "Blow Up Your Video," "Flick of the Switch," "Fly on the Wall," and the outrageous 1978 Scott-led live set "If You Want Blood, You've Got It" have never sounded better. AC/DC, recent inductees into the Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall of Fame, have similar plans for several other discs in their catalog.

Blinging Your Wallet Dept.

You just gotta love the way some of the more established artists keep fresh bucks pouring into their coffers. KISS has announced that they will appear at the National Sports Collectors Convention July 24-27 in Atlantic City but, with maybe the exception of the fluttertongued GENE SIMMONS, the band won't be playing a lick. For just $500, fans will have the opportunity to pose with the foursome (who will be in full make-up) for a photo perfect for the front of their next Christmas, Hanukkah or Festivus card. Nice guys that they are, KISS will even autograph the pic for you as well.

REM has announced that power-pop artist PETE YORN will open for the band on their tour-ending October 11 show at Philips Arena in Atlanta. A "Best-Of" will be issued in the fall with a couple of new tunes included with the hits. The band has worked up 70 tunes from their extensive catalog for the tour, which is a long-overdue attempt to regain the band's credibility. REM's last three albums, "New Adventures," "Up" and "Reveal," have all been poor sellers and were not well-received by fans and critics.

Another hot '90s band that has been extremely quiet lately is BLUES

TRAVELER. JOHN POPPER and band have a new project completed and ready for release August 5. Their last studio disc, 2001's "Bridge," moved only 137,000 copies, but the band remains a good draw for concerts. Southern dates have not been announced as the band is currently on the road out West.

Turner's Quick Notes The late CLASH guitarist-vocalist JOE STRUMMER has his final studio offering, "Streetcore," due this fall. It contains a cover of BOB MARLEY'S great "Redemption Song" ... An autographed copy of THE BEATLES 1967 "Sgt. Peppers" album recently sold for $69,000 at Leland's Auction House ...

THE FLAMING LIPS have agreed to split the royalties of their recent song "Fight Test" with CAT STEVENS, as it contains the same basic medley and chord structure of everyone's favorite Islamic singer's composition "Father and Son" ... A new JIMMY CLIFF "Anthology" features reggae classics such as "Trapped" and "Club Paradise."

New Albums in the Stores This Week ASHANTI’S "Chapter 2," PAUL CARRACK’S (ex-SQUEEZE, ACE, and MIKE AND THE MECHANICS) "It Ain't Over," ROBERT CRAY’S "Time Will Tell," MORCHEEBA’S "Part of the Process," WILLIE NELSON & RAY PRICE’S "Run That

by Me," OUR LADY PEACE’S "Live From Calgary," COREY STEVENS’ "Bring On the Blues," HOWARD TATE’S "Rediscovered," GINO VANNELLI’S "Canto," and THE WHO’S "Live at the Royal Albert Hall."

Turner's Rock ‘N’ Roll Jeopardy A. In June 1968, this musician was the first R&B artist to fly to Vietnam for a series of concerts for U.S. soldiers.

Q. Who is James Brown?

36

THE FLAMING LIPS

BY

ED TURNER

37

Music: Band

The Boo Hoo Ramblers Bring Heartbreak Songs to Augusta

1/2 Priced Appetizers Monday-Friday 4-6pm Surrey Center • Bar Patrons Only

By Lisa Jordan

4-7 DAILY

TUESDAYS CRAB LEGS $6.99/LB

• Shell-On Boiled Shrimp • Jumbo Oysters on the half shell • Chicken Liver Pate • Chilled Smoked Salmon • Crawfish • Andouille Sausage • Mussels • Crawfish or Alligator Popcorn • Jambalaya • Red Beans and Rice • Marinated Shrimp • Oysters and Artichoke Soup • Creole File Gumbo • She Crab Soup Plus Appetizer Specials

T

he first thing you see when you visit The Boo Hoo Ramblers’ Web site is their slogan: “Bringing you the finest in sad ol’ country heartbrake tunes … and other things.”

That seems to pretty much sum them up.

“I don’t suppose there’s a tremendous amount to know,” began Clark Ashton, guitarist, singer and songwriter for the group. “We’ve been together for about a year, a little bit over a year. We released a CD back in March, our first release.

We’ve been playing around Atlanta.”

But the Ramblers ventured out of Atlanta and played the grand opening of Augusta’s Stillwater Tap Room last month, where they’re scheduled to appear again July 11.

“I’m originally from Augusta,” said Ashton. “I left there in ’78, so it’s been quite a while, but I still have a couple of friends in town.”

The Stillwater show went so well, the band is hoping to make a gig there a monthly thing.

“I thought it was just great. To tell you the truth, I had never seen that many people downtown in Augusta before,” Ashton said. “It was First Friday. The bar was packed, and it was so packed that it was difficult to move. I would say it was a very positive show, and we’re looking forward to coming back.”

Also on the Ramblers’ Web site, you’ll find out that the group – Ashton, bass player Pete Frisina and Patrick Mitchell on fiddle – is based out of Ashton’s Commuter Gallery in Decatur, Ga. “I am the creator of the Commuter Gallery,” he said. “I started making metal sculpture back in 1989 or so, and now I’ve developed my home/studio into a sort of semi-public sculpture garden. It’s somewhat of an Atlanta landmark, actually.”

After spending a year teaching at

Georgia Tech and completing a number of smaller residencies, Ashton set to working on a large project, called “Infrastructure of an Uncertain Future,” that took him five years to complete.

Following that, music became a sort of respite from art.

“The Commuter Gallery remains,” Ashton added. “It’s always here.”

But music is nothing new for Ashton.

“I was doing music, I guess, probably early ‘80s. I mean, technically speaking, I had a band in Augusta when I was 13, but I never really had a band that played out until the early ‘80s. There’s been a variety of different bands: rock ‘n’ roll, cover bands, new wave. So now I’m just country, folk, bluegrass. Seems to be one of the more natural things for me. It’s probably more real.”

When the Metro Spirit asked if the name The Boo Hoo Ramblers was a tongue-incheek dig at the often-sad nature of country music, Ashton said, “We make sort of jokes about it, I suppose. Where it actually came from was another friend of mine, who I was in a band with in the mid-‘80s.”

That friend released a CD last year, which was reviewed in Atlanta’s Creative Loafing. “One of the questions was to sort of describe the Atlanta music scene, and he came out with this long, 30-adjective sentence, blah blah blah, boo hoo rambling, blah blah blah. He calls me up and he goes, ‘You know when it said boo hoo rambling?

Well, I was talking about you.’ So I said, ‘I think I’ll start a band and call it that.’And so about two weeks later, I did.

“The songs that I gravitate towards are generally just heartbroke songs, so it seemed to fit. I like the sound of it.”

Check out The Boo Hoo Ramblers at Stillwater Tap Room July 11. For more information on the show, call 826-9857.

For more information on the band, visit www.boohooramblers.com.

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Eminem’s Wife Busted for Cocaine Possesion Kim Mathers, immortalized by the lyrics of ex-husband Marshall Mathers (that’s Eminem to you), has pleaded innocent to charges of cocaine possession. She was arrested on June 10 near St. Clair Shores in Michigan, for driving like a fool. It was then discovered that her license had been suspended and that she had two baggies of white powder which later tested as cocaine. This is not her first coke arrest, though she was not convicted in the 2001 incident. Sept. 9 will find her in court again for a preliminary examination.

Mystikal Proves To Be Dumba** Rapper Mystikal, who has gotten the honor just to be nominated for a Grammy, has pleaded guilty to forcing sex on his hairdresser. According to the allegations, the acts were videotaped by two other men. For posterity, perhaps? His side of the story is that she had been stealing checks from him and he agreed not to tell police if she did something "degrading." Just makes you want to take him home to Mama, doesn’t it?

File-Sharing Service Up Creek, Paddleless Aimster and its owner John Deep are in deep doo-doo. The U.S. Court of Appeals for the Seventh Circuit in Chicago said no way to Aimster’s appeal of the copyright-infringement charges leveled against them by the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA) earlier this year. In an earlier case against similar services Grokster and Morpheus, the services were not held liable for their clients’ alleged illegal activities because, the judge ruled, the services are capable of being used in such a way that does not violate copyright law. The RIAA says that the Aimster decision calls that view into question.

Man Sells Imaginary Bjork Tix. Man Busted.

Aleso Conate pleaded guilty to selling tickets to a Bjork concert that was never planned.

A police detective testified that Conate had convinced the manager of a San Diego club that Bjork wanted to perform there Jan. 15.

He then proceeded to sell tickets for $40 apiece, and allegedly made $9,000. A little under $2,000 of that wound up in the undies of female dancers in a Honolulu club.

COMPILED BY RHONDA JONES Information compiled from online and other music news sources.

Night Life

39

3

THURSDAY

GREASY BEANS

from Asheville, NC

S P I R I T

These boys can kick it Back-Porch Style

11

THURSDAY

THE BOOHOO RAMBLERS

Bringing you the finest in sad ‘ol country heartbreak tunes … and other things

Photo by Joe White

HAPPY HOUR

TUES-SAT >> 4-7 PM

Left Front Tire performs at Summerfest 2003 July 3 at Stool Pigeons. 420 Outback and The Big Mighty are also scheduled to play.

Thursday, 3rd The Bee’s Knees - 12*Tone Lounge The Big Easy - Buzz Clif ford, George Sykes Blind Pig - Open Mic Night Cafe Du Teau - Bernard Chambers Club Argos - Karaoke Dance Par t y with DJ Joe Steel Coliseum - Karaoke with Travis, Hi-Energy Dance Continuum - Playa*Listic Thursday Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Fox’s Lair - Karaoke Greene Streets - Men’s Pop, Rock, Blues and Soul National Karaoke Contest Joe’s Underground - Michael Baideme Last Call - Stewar t & Winfield Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - SKYNN with DJ Richie Rich Playground - Open Mic Night Red Lion - Paul Arrowood Soul Bar - The Elliot Holden Band featuring Keith Jenkins and Eric Hargrove Stillwater Tap Room - Greasy Beans Stool Pigeons - Summer fest 2003 with Lef t Front Tire, 420 Outback, The Big Mighty Surrey Tavern - Sabo and the Scorchers TGI Friday’s - Jayson Sabo Time Piecez - DJ Dance Par ty

Friday, 4th Andy’s - Randy Carver Jr. and El Dorado Deluxe Back Roads - DJ The Bee’s Knees - Shaun Piazza and Friends, Ar t by Andrew Benjamin The Big Easy - Air Apparent Blind Pig - Shameless Dave and E. Freddie Sanders featuring Pops Williams Borders - Carl Purdy

Cafe Du Teau - Bernard Chambers Club Argos - Four th of July Celebration, DJ Joe Steel Coliseum - Barbra Barranger Cotton Patch - Sabo and the Scorchers Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads - Jemani, 420 Outback, Mud Wrestling D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Durango’s - Magic Hat Eagle’s Nest - Karaoke with DJ MJ Greene Streets - Karaoke Hangnail Gallery - Tur tleneck, Estrela, The Hellblinki Sex tet, DSS, Incidental Orchestra Highlander - Senatobia Joe’s Underground - Keith “Fossill” Gregory Last Call - Tony Howard, DJ Richie Rich, DJ Boom Marlboro Station - Lauren Alexander Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - Fashion Show, DJ Kenny Ray Partridge Inn - Jazz Soulstice with Anthony Carpenter Playground - Lee Street The Pourhouse - The Recaps Review featuring Sassy Brass Red Lion - Blind Mojo Rio Bomba - DJ Rodriguez Brothers, Karaoke with Russ Schneider The Shack - DJ Chip Soul Bar - First Friday Ar t Exhibit, Live Salsa with Grupo Vacunado Surrey Tavern - Playback with Tutu D’Vyne Vallarta - Four th of July Celebration with AllStar Frogs

Saturday, 5th Andy’s - Pop Williams and Son Back Roads - DJ The Big Easy - Buzz Clif ford, George Sykes Blind Pig - Shameless Dave and the Miracle Whips

Borders - Miles Anderson Cafe Du Teau - Bernard Chambers Club Argos - Argos Angels Cabaret with Petite, Sasha, Claire Storm and guests, DJ Joe Steel Coliseum - Lauren Alexander Cotton Patch - Jayson Sabo and Friends Coyote’s - Dierks Bentley Crossroads - Dance Par ty with DJ Chris D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Durango’s - Magic Hat Greene Streets - Karaoke Hangnail Gallery - Gearbox Joe’s Underground - Medicine Hat Last Call - New Day, DJ Richie Rich, DJ Boom Marlboro Station - Miss Peg Metro Coffeehouse - Live Af ternoon Bluegrass with Eryn Eubanks and the Family Fold Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - DJ Boriqua Partridge Inn - Sandy B. and the All-Stars The Pourhouse - The Recaps Review featuring Sassy Brass Red Lion - Black-Eyed Susan Rio Bomba - DJ Rodriguez Brothers The Shack - DJ Buckwheat Soul Bar - An Evening of Blues with Park Bench Trio, El Dorado Deluxe Surrey Tavern - Playback with Tutu D’Vyne Tops Lounge - Siclid, Embryo

Sunday, 6th Cafe Du Teau - The Last Bohemian Quar tet Cotton Patch - Dennis Hall Marlboro Station - Claire Storm Orange Moon - Smooth Jazz Sunday with Emery Bennet t The Shack - Karaoke with DJ Joe Steel, Sasha’s Cabaret Somewhere in Augusta - Patrick Blanchard

M E T R O

18 DRAFT BEERS TO CHOOSE FROM 16 OZ. $2 DRAFT $3 WELL AND $4 CALL

WE ARE GOING ON VACATION

CLOSED SAT JULY 5 - JULY 8 OPENING BACK UP ON WED JULY 9

taproom

taproom

974 Broad Street 826-9857 (Next to Nacho Mama’s) Open Tues-Sat 4pm-until

J U L Y 3 2 0 0 3

40 M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 3 2 0 0 3

Monday, 7th

Coliseum - Q.A.F. Continuum - Monday Madness Crossroads - Dance Par ty with DJ Mykie G Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - John Kolbeck Surrey Tavern - Pat Blanchard

Tuesday, 8th

Adams Nightclub - Karaoke with Bill Tolber t Blind Pig - Jayson and Mike Coliseum - Tournament Tuesday D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express French Market Grille West - Wayne Capps Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - John Kolbeck Metro Coffeehouse - Irish Night with Sibin Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Stool Pigeons - Karaoke Surrey Tavern - Tuesday Night Jam Session

Wednesday, 9th

Blind Pig - A Midweek Summer’s Dream with Candice Hurst and Buzz Clif ford Club Argos - DJ Joe Steel Coliseum - Wet ‘n’ Wild Talent Search Continuum - Open Mic Jam Sessions Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads - Finger Eleven, Echo 7, doubleDrive D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue

Diamond Express Greene Streets - Women’s Pop, Rock, Blues and Soul National Karaoke Contest Joe’s Underground - Ruskin Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - Theology on Tap Playground - Karaoke The Pourhouse - Edmond P. “The Lurch” Kida Somewhere in Augusta - Brandon Bower Soul Bar - Live Jazz Surrey Tavern - John Kolbeck Veracruz - Wayne Capps

Upcoming

Miss Club Argos - Club Argos - July 11 Elizabeth Taylor AIDS Foundation Benefit - Club Argos - Aug. 15

Elsewhere

Sandi Patty - Mable House Amphitheatre, Mableton, Ga. - July 4 Brenda Lee, Nitty Gritty Dirt Band - Georgia Mountain Fair, Hiawassee, Ga. - July 5 Hall and Oates - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta - July 6 Colin Hay - Wills Park Equestrian Center, Alpharet ta, Ga. - July 10 Better Than Ezra, Lifehouse, Ingram Hill, The Robert Barnes Band - Centennial Olympic Park, Atlanta - July 11 Rachelle Ferrell - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta July 11 Hot Hot Heat - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - July 11

The Greasy Beans play Stillwater Tap Room July 3.

The Fall - Echo Lounge, Atlanta - July 12 Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlake - Philips Arena, Atlanta - July 12 Collin Raye - Mable House Amphitheatre, Mableton, Ga. - July 12 Mel & The Party Hats - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - July 12 Meat Loaf - The Tabernacle, Atlanta - July 15 Caillou - Mable House Amphitheatre, Mableton, Ga. - July 16-17 Dave Gahan - Roxy Theatre, Atlanta - July 18 Robert Bradley’s Black water Surprise, Mieka Pauley, Juniper Lane - Centennial Olympic Park, Atlanta - July 18 Charley Pride, Darryl Worley - Georgia Mountain Fair, Hiawassee, Ga. - July 19 Tift Merritt & The Carbines - Smith’s Olde Bar, Atlanta - July 19 David Cassidy - Mable House Amphitheatre, Mableton, Ga. - July 19 Modest Mouse - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta July 22 The Outfield - Wills Park Equestrian Center, Alpharet ta, Ga. - July 24 Everclear, Maroon 5, Evenout, Kill Hannah Centennial Olympic Park, Atlanta - July 25 Ginny Owens and Caedmon’s Call - Mable House Amphitheatre, Mableton, Ga. - July 26 Nickel Creek, Frank y Perez, Antigone Rising Centennial Olympic Park, Atlanta - Aug. 1 Restless Heart - Mable House Amphitheatre, Mableton, Ga. - Aug. 2 Eels - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta - Aug. 7 Liz Phair, Hootie and the Blowfish, Tonic, The

Clarks, Bain Mattox - Centennial Olympic Park, Atlanta - Aug. 8 The Headhunters - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta Aug. 9 Flashback Festival - HiFi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta - Aug. 9 George Clinton and Parliament/Funkadelic, North Mississippi All-Stars, Kevn Kinney Band - Centennial Olympic Park, Atlanta - Aug. 15 Bebo Norman - Mable House Amphitheatre, Mableton, Ga. - Aug. 16 Saw Doctors - Variet y Playhouse, Atlanta Aug. 19 Goo Goo Dolls, Pat McGee Band, Marc Broussard - Centennial Olympic Park, Atlanta Aug. 22 Don McLean - Mable House Amphitheatre, Mableton, Ga. - Aug. 23 Pam Tillis - Mable House Amphitheatre, Mableton, Ga. - Sept. 6 Aerosmith, Kiss - HiFi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta - Sept. 14 Many tickets are available through TicketMaster outlets, by calling 828-7700, or online at w w w.ticketmaster.com. Tickets may also be available through Tix Online by calling 278-4TIX or online at w w w.tixonline.com. Night Life listings are subject to change without notice.

Deadline for inclusion in Night Life calendar is Tuesday at 4 p.m. Contact Rhonda Jones or Lisa Jordan by calling 738-1142, fa xing 736-0443 or e-mailing to rhonda.jones@metrospirit.com or lisa.jordan@metrospirit.com.

mon - PAT BLANCHARD

Surrey Tavern fri & sat PLAYBACK WITH TUTU D’VYNE 471 Highland Ave. | 736-1221 Open Mon-Sat at 4 pm until t u e s - T U E S D AY N I G H T

JAM SESSION

wed - J O H N K O L B E C K

Catch El Dorado Deluxe twice this weekend: They’ll be celebrating July 4 at Andy’s and playing with Athens’ Park Bench Trio July 5 at the Soul Bar.

1ST ANNUAL OUTDOOR

SUMMERFEST

Photo: Joe White

JULY 3 | 6 PM-MIDNIGHT

LEFT FRONT TIRE

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T O N I G H T

41 M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 3 2 0 0 3

42

News

M E T R O

of the

S P I R I T

Weird A

J U L Y 3 2 0 0 3

Life is hectic. Weekends shouldn't have to be. Join Scott Simon for Weekend Edition every Saturday at 8:00 AM on WACG, 90.7 FM. Reclaim your Saturday and hear weekend news, views, and commentary. From gardening tips and film reviews to in-depth news analysis, Peabody Award-winning host Scott Simon eases you into the weekend with a fresh

Photo of Scott Simon by Lisa Berg

perspective.

Call us at (800) 654-3038 or visit us at www.gpb.org for more information about our programming.

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June Associated Press dispatch from Macha, Bolivia, reported on the most prominent of the annual Tinku festivals that neighboring tribes on the country’s high plains engage in. On a midnight in May, as thousands gathered to drink and dance, the men eventually began to fistfight in a bloody ritual that tribal leaders say is healthy and spiritual, even though some men are beaten badly, and occasionally someone dies (which, legend says, is good for crop fertilization). Villagers say the one-night fighting answers feuds and insults built up over the year and fosters brotherhood. The Bolivian government has tried, unsuccessfully, to stop the violence in recent years.

• Weird India: On June 15, according to Dr. Chittaranjan Maity (the medical education director of the state of West Bengal), a 13-year-old boy began producing quarterinch-long winged beetles in his urine after eggs hatched in his body. And a few days earlier in the Hooghly district of West Bengal, according to a report in the Press Trust of India, a nine-year-old girl was “married” (in a non-binding ceremony) to a stray dog, which tribal custom requires in order to protect a child whose first tooth appears on the upper gum. The marriage had been delayed for several years because of financial considerations.

Our Litigious Society • Familiar Injuries, Big Bucks. If you reach for a door while a person on the other side pushes the door toward you, you might get your fingers jammed. It happened to Cedrick Makara, 56, in a restroom stall at his New York City office building, and in May, a court awarded him $3 million for ruptured tendons in his thumb that caused him to miss work for six months. And in Camden, N.J., in February, schoolteacher Eileen Blau filed a lawsuit for “severe and multiple injuries” caused when 11-year-old, 90-pound student Daniel Allen accidentally ran into her while engaged in hallway horseplay.

• Michael Machetti, 31, filed a lawsuit in Riverside County, Calif., in April against Bullseye Tattoo and its owner, charging that the tattoo removal he had done on his neck had infected him with the flesh-eating disease necrotizing fasciitis. Machetti said he went for the removal because co-workers had complained about the familiar twoword obscene phrase (the second word: “you”) on his neck, and he wanted it replaced with the apparently more acceptable “666.”

• Sue the Victim (continued). Kenneth J. Lewis II, serving 12 years in prison for burglary, filed a $140,000 lawsuit against property owner Nina Baugh, who had chased after Lewis and shot him in the arm (Bentonville, Ark., April). Willie Brown, 44, serving four years in prison for a convenience store robbery, filed a lawsuit

against the clerk who had shot him (with Brown maintaining, “(T)here was no need for the use of deadly force,” even though Brown had claimed to have a gun) (Muncie, Ind., April). And in a court filing in May opposing early release for farmer Tony Martin, who had been convicted of killing a burglar, Britain’s Home Office argued against parole, maintaining that the government must protect burglars from violent homeowners.

• Sally Carden Davies, 48, was awarded the equivalent of U.S. $310,000 by a court in Sydney, Australia, in March for falling off an odd-looking chair in a cafe and suffering various injuries, including the loss of her sexual urge, which she said caused a romantic relationship to falter. Davies said her injuries have also affected her practice as a horse dentist.

• Justin Scheidt filed a lawsuit in May against the Showgirl III strip club in Fort Wayne, Ind., for “serious and permanent injuries” to his groin area received after he consented to take the stage with several dancers during their show. Scheidt, as a climax to his bachelor party that night, complied with the women’s requests and lay on his back with his legs around the dancers’ pole, after which they began climbing the pole and sliding down squarely on his groin. Scheidt went ahead with his wedding but said he was unable to consummate the marriage because of his injuries.

People Different from Us • In Newport Beach, Calif., in May, Trenton M. Veches, 32, was convicted of 22 counts of lewd conduct, with the “sexuality” involved consisting merely of sucking the toes of boys aged 6 to 10. Veches’ attorney said the behavior was weird but not legally “lewd” because Veches touched only the feet and, in fact, was not physically “aroused” himself, but an expert witness for the prosecution said people can be sexually stimulated without showing arousal.

Our Civilization in Decline • (1) Chicago police arrested six people in June and charged them with running an insurance scam, which was allegedly led by a 39-year-old man known as Bonecrusher; police said homeless men consented to have Bonecrusher administer compound fractures of the arm or leg, and they would then be taken to staged accident scenes and instructed how to make quick settlements with insurance companies of up to $100,000 (but getting to keep only about $1,500 of it). (2) And Sheffield Hallam University (Sheffield, England) announced in May that it would inaugurate a Master’s degree program in creating video games; a spokesman for a Sony U.K. company said, “We hope more universities will start offering (curricula) like this.”

Also, in the Last Month • A 29-year-old man was hospitalized in fair condition after he playfully put a 4-inchlong fish in his mouth (not realizing the fish would head for the only opening, his esophagus) (Macomb, Ill.). At La Mesa Junior High School (where students can be expelled for carrying even squirt guns), the yearbook came out with a quarter-page ad for the National Rifle Association (Santa Clarita, Calif.). The 48-year-old owner of a skydiving service whose fatality rate is eight times the national average was killed while skydiving (Ottawa, Ill.).

— Chuck Shepherd

Brezsny's Free Will Astrology ARIES (March 21-April 19)

The United States often leads the way in dreaming up novel gourmet treats, but China is now marketing an amazing product that American food designers haven’t even begun to develop: milk beer. Appealing to both the infantile longing for creamy liquid nourishment and the adult craving for inhibition-loosening alcohol, it’s bound to become the 21st century’s first new staple. From an astrological perspective, Aries, the time is ripe for you to gorge yourself with a blend like milk beer. If it’s not yet being sold in your area, I suggest you mix up your own batch.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

Dear Mr. Brezsny: Your horoscopes are useless. Most of them are full of philosophical crap that has nothing to do with my daily life. Enough with the metaphors already! Just tell me if there’s love or money or trouble in my future — stuff that normal horoscopes say!

— Testy Taurus Dear Testy: I predict that in the coming week, you and your fellow bulls will have close encounters with the kind of experience you just directed at me. In other words, people will try to get you to be something other than what you are. Do not, under any circumstances, cave into them.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20)

Gemini performer Keith Hennessy teaches classes in improvisation. I’ll quote his ideas about the subject because they perfectly describe the nature of the spirit you should invoke in the coming weeks. Here’s his definition of improvisation. “The art of being in full awareness and integrity right now. The opposite of repression. The closest we get to the source language of creativity, soul, play and magic. A crazy attempt to align body and mind not only in the pursuit of freedom, but in the actual experience of freedom. Intentional spontaneity. The beauty and truth of the wild.”

CANCER (June 21-July 22)

To quote an old song, Cancerian, your future lies beyond the yellow brick road. In other words, it’s time to let go of the fairy-tale vision of success that fueled you when you were young and naive. A more mature dream is calling, inviting you to get older and wiser fast.

Initially, this replacement may feel like a loss, but ultimately it will awaken passions and ingenuity that the original goal would never have coaxed out. Ironically, it will also lead you to rewards that the yellow brick road promised but never could have delivered.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)

Dragon alert! You have a date with an influence that has a metaphorical resemblance to a scaly, winged, fire-breathing beast. As daunting as that may sound, you shouldn’t avoid it; I believe it will actually help your soul grow bigger and stronger. On the other hand, there’s no need to immediately race over to the dragon’s cave and poke it with a stick. Try to arrange a meeting that takes place on your home turf and in the presence of your allies.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

My acquaintance John traveled to Antarctica. On the first day, the guide took him and his group to a remote area and left them alone for an hour to commune with the pristine air and unearthly stillness. After a while, a penguin ambled up and launched into a ceremonial display of squawks and stretches. John responded with recitals of his favorite memorized poems, imagining he was “engaged in a conversation with eternity.” Then the penguin sent a stream of green projectile vomit cascading against his chest, and shuffled away.

Though John initially felt deflated by eternity’s surprise, no harm was done. Later he came to see it as a first-class cosmic joke, and treasured its value as an amusing story with which to regale his friends back home. I predict you will have an analogous experience in the coming week, Libra.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

You’re like an arrow in flight, Scorpio. You’re a halfcooked feast, the fifth month of pregnancy, the week before a big election. When I turned my psychic vision towards you just now, I saw an image of a worker bee freshly returned to the hive to perform the dance that will tell its companions where to find a patch of blooming snapdragons. Have you ever mastered a second language? Where you are at this moment resembles the time right before you attain fluency.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

A fundamentalist is anyone who thinks his belief system trumps all others. Religious fanatics are the most obvious example, but scientists can be fundamentalists. So can socialists or capitalists, environmentalists or atheists. Every fundamentalist divides the world into two camps, those who agree with him and those who don’t. To him, there is one right way and a million wrong ways to interpret reality. Now here’s the uncomfortable news: Every one of us has the fundamentalist virus. It may not be as virulent in you and me as it is in the bad guys we love to hate, but we’re all infected. Luckily, Virgo, you’re in an astrological phase when you can achieve a partial cure. To begin, take everything less seriously and less personally and less literally.

When I relocated from Santa Cruz to Marin County in 1991, I moved from a hotbed of alternative lifestyles to a very wealthy community. In making the transition, I knew I’d have to deal with a character flaw: my prejudice against rich white people. Over the years, I’ve made great progress in dissolving my bigotry, but today I was sorely tested. While walking downtown, I spied a Lexus SC-430 with a vanity license plate that read “PUREHRT.” Indignation surged through me as I thought, “It’s inconceivable that the owner of a $60,000 sports car could have a pure heart!” But soon my compassionate mind kicked in, and I opened to the possibility, quieting my judgmental reflex. Let this tale serve as your inspiration this week, Sagittarius. It’s time to have a showdown with your deepest prejudice.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

At last year’s Burning Man, the week-long festival of cheerful mischief in the Nevada desert, a character calling himself Mother Very Superior was

New York Times Crossword Puzzle

y ACROSS 1 Leading lady 5 It’s said when taking off 9 Take off 14 Kaffiyeh sporter 15 Score after deuce 16 People concerned with feet 17 President Taft’s alma mater 18 It may be driven during a storm 19 Namely 20 Like a line 23 Coll. hoops competition 24 Beam 25 Place for a shore dinner, maybe 29 Height enhancer 31 “Listen, ___ …”

34 “The Brady Bunch” housekeeper

35 Self-starter?

36 Ear piece 37 They’re packed

during the holidays 40 Suffix for hightech gadgets 41 Groundless 42 Take forcefully 43 Teutonic name part 44 Don’t take off 45 Sky pilots, so to speak 46 Animal with a mane 47 Hegelian article 48 Hit Broadway play of 1945, with “The” 55 Walk together 57 ___ end 58 Major goldmining area, with “the” 59 Certain backwater

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE J A V E R T M A D E

O T I O S E

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E L E A T I C T R C T O R H U E S A N G T E P I C T I C K L T D I R A E LE SM E M D O E S V E N T O N I N E L E A T O V O L U T I E N R U S D S E X E

S T I O G O N L A F A N E T S L E IZ V C A R A L O B J B I E O N A T N S

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instrument family 61 Fizzy wine, familiarly 62 59-Across relative 63 Wax makers 64 One that gets tongue-tied?

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catchword 2 Home of many mullahs 3 Hollow between hills 4 Not up yet 5 State adjoining the Bass Strait 6 Unlikely to reconsider 7 Pantry containers 8 “___ quote …”

9 Like some injuries 10 Now 11 Whirl 12 Possessive pronoun 13 Hrs. in the West 21 Private 22 Lunchbox treats 25 Show with skits 26 Olds model 27 Really tease 28 Self-confident assertion 29 By any practical means 30 Ranch add-on?

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Puzzle by Dan Reichert

33 Egg holders 35 Heather’s

“Melrose Place” role 36 Powerful person 38 Shakespeare’s Andronicus 39 Nashville sound?

44 Buy in a hurry

45 “Grand” things 46 Opposite of

cheer

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remember

52 Ill-considered

47 Spring (from)

53 Turned on by

48 Maja painter

54 Falco of “The

49 General Motors

division

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wearer

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)

Everyone needs music, but you, Pisces, can’t survive without it. Your moist, hungry, undulating soul tends to devolve into confusion without regular exposure to music’s wild intelligence. It’s also important for you to keep finding fresh songs to commune with. Depending solely on those that moved you once upon a time encourages you to commit a sin your tribe has to be wary of: Living in the past. As for what music would nourish you best right now, I’ll trust your intuition to guide you. But here’s some soul food for thought from the song “Green Light: Now Begin,” by hip-hop group Blackalicious: “No more of that sittin’ in a slump/ No more of that coulda-woulda shoulda junk/ No more of that waiting for the inspiration, innovation/ It’s time to expand, power from within, you’re takin’ over this dominion/ Green light, now begin.”

You can call Rob Brezsny, day or night, for your Expanded Weekly Horoscope

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AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

Being right doesn’t guarantee success in the coming week. Nor does being strong or smart or rich or wellconnected. No, Aquarius, none of the usual assets will be of much use if you want to triumph over adversity.

There is another way, though. It would require you to be tricky yet ethical. You’d have to be good in a sneaky way, or pull off some subterfuge while aflame with a noble purpose. Here’s another tip for ensuring victory: Renounce any attachment you have to getting full credit for your heroic efforts.

Adult Supercenter

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1 Harry Belafonte

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omnipresent. Clad in a nun’s habit and black leather chastity belt, he roamed far and wide, dispensing blessings with a toy cat-o’-nine-tails. “I hereby absolve you of your sins,” he chanted as he softly whipped anyone who consented to his gift, “so now you are free to go ahead and sin like crazy.” I suggest you find someone to do you a similar favor, Capricorn. To take maximum advantage of the explosive fun that will be available in the near future, you should get your karmic debt down as close as possible to zero.

Sopranos”

55 Cable’s

Superstation

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am a 37-year-old gay man. After dating “Michael” on and off for two years, I started seeing him exclusively. He’s wonderful, great fun and treats me like royalty. His most annoying habit is his reluctance to let me pick up or even split a dinner check. He brings adventure to my life (like by taking me out on his motorcycle), and I expose him to new things as well. The problem is my friends. They aren’t shy about insisting (out of his earshot, thankfully) that he’s my intellectual inferior, and any serious relationship won’t last. Michael’s no Einstein, but I can talk to him for hours, even if we discuss a U2 concert instead of Bono’s politics. (Frankly, I have all the geopolitical, socio-sexual banter I need, socially and at work.) Before Michael, I would have described my “perfect 10” as an intellectual corporate executive with a body like Adonis. But, even if Michael became that tomorrow, it wouldn’t make me desire him more. I think I’d be very happy sharing my life with him. For me, though, a committed relationship should be forever, so I don’t want to start something that’s doomed from the outset. Maybe I should rethink these friends’ place in my life. Or should I let Michael go to spare him the “inevitable” breakup down the road and add “IQs below 150 needn’t apply” to the personals ad I place afterward?

— Accidentally Overjoyed

vague. There’s no mention in “happily ever after” of who, exactly, is on doggie vomit duty, and who’s in the humiliating position of making up sad stories for the 1-800 lady when the credit card bill is late.

Obviously, bans on hallucinogens were a failure, even way back in Hans’ and the G-Brothers’ day.

This isn’t to say you can’t have it all. You just can’t have it all in one place. So your boyfriend can’t break into Middle English to ask whether you’ve done the dishes or build a nuclear reactor out of common household cleaning products. The guy makes you happy. Not happy in the way you’d planned to be happy, but actually happy. You could drop him and keep reaching for the intellectual brass ring because others insist you need it.

Unfortunately, the brass ring, should you ever get your hands on it, will likely turn your finger the same color as all your “friends” who find it troubling that you’re having sex instead of a sexual politics roundtable. _______________________________

Most people start out with a list — the stuff they just must have in a partner. A list is a good thing, to a point — the point at which one’s list, when bound, looks like the New York City phone book, and reads like it came from somebody who writes the small print for airline frequent flyer programs.

There’s a Freudian term for people like this, but I think “terminally single” sounds more polite.

Too bad you, like so many people, copied your expectations out of the wrong best-selling relationship manuals — those written by the likes of Hans Christian Andersen and The Brothers Grimm. The fairy tale has it that there’s one perfect person for you; you just collect him and proceed to the checkout lane marked “happily ever after.” But what if there’s more to you than being merely a princess in distress or a guy in a tin suit with a really bad pageboy (is there any other kind?) who offs the knight with the big, black “Village People” goatee? And “happily ever after”? That’s very

I’m always a little afraid I’ll be grabbed and held down by those department store cosmetics girls, then made over against my will: “Hey, I might write like a godless harlot, but I don’t want to look like one!” Your forced transformation was more dermatological: from live-in girlfriend to giant mole in need of burning off. It’s no wonder you’re looking longingly at the past. Give yourself time to inventory what you actually miss — your routine, your identity in the relationship, your expectations for him and not feeling like somebody yanked the stopper out of your life, to name a few. Figuring out what you do miss should help you figure out what you don’t: a guy who treats women like epidermal issues — moving onto his next mole candidate before he’s had the last one completely excised.

After living with my boyfriend for five years, he told me I had to go. It took me two weeks to move out; it only took him one week to start sleeping with a woman he met over the Internet. Though I’m lonely, I’m too heartbroken to think about meeting other guys. This guy turned out to be such a jerk — why do I miss him so much?

— Tossed and Turning

— © 2003, Amy Alkon

Got A Problem?

Write Amy Alkon

171 Pier Ave., Box 280 • Santa Monica, CA 90405 or e-mail AdviceAmy@aol.com

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Seeking WM, 35-48, N/S, to be a companion, friend. ☎456544 ALL I WANT IS YOU SB mom, 28, is in search of a man, 25-45, who would want to start off as friends, leading into more. ☎459939

ENVELOPING EMBRACE Kind-hearted SBCF, 52, non-smoker, enjoys dining out, attending church.

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Seeking SWF, 25-35, N/S, N/D, who enjoys good times, dating, for LTR. ☎341418 WELL-ROUNDED MAN Educated DBPM, 41, 5’11”, loves reading, working out, the arts, dining out, travel, quiet times. Would like to meet female, 3045, with similar interests, for fun, friendship, and maybe more. ☎442021 TAKE ME ON Male, 34, 5’10”, 180lbs, black/hazel, Capricorn, financially secure, smoker, seeks woman, 27-39, smoker, petite, who loves Nascar and beaches. ☎429058

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LOVES TO LAUGH Attractive SWF, 19, 5’9”, Libra, smoker, seeks WM, 18-35, for a solid, good, honest friendship leading towards LTR. ☎455393 NO INTRO NEEDED SBCF, 26, 5’4”, 130lbs, single parent of a 7year-old son, very independent, Gemini, N/S, seeks BM, 27-40, to be my friend. ☎432010 SEARCHING FOR MR RIGHT SBPF, 39, Libra, loves church, traveling, movies, and dining out. Seeking SBPM, 3760, for possible LTR. ☎421273 A SPECIAL SOMEONE SBF, 25, mother, seek financially stable, independent man, 20-45, who loves children, for LTR . ☎415803 A SIMPLE GAL SWF, 35, 5’4”, seeks laid back man, 18-40, for casual dating, friendship maybe more. ☎418340 NICE EVENINGS Attractive SBF, 35, enjoys nice evenings, conversation, seeking loving SBM, 30-37, for nice evenings. ☎400597 OUTGOING/OUTDOORS TYPE Tall, full-figured, SF, 5’10, long red hair, green eyes, outgoing, outdoors type, spends allot of time with two children, likes movies and sports. Seeking compatible SM, 24-40. ☎402582 TAKE ME DANCING SWF, 25, 5’9”, blonde/brown, Gemini, N/S, seeks WM, 30-38, N/S, who likes kids. For dating. ☎385501 LIGHT UP MY LIFE Beautiful BF, 60, 5’11”, with a brown complexion, N/S, N/D, has lots of love and passion to share with a SBM, who goes to church. ☎383766 MORE THAN AVERAGE Slender SBF, 53, 5’2”, independent, Aries, smoker, loves music, conversation, laughter. Seeking independent, mature SBM, 4865, for friendship first. ☎369627 HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER SWF, 57, 5’11”, 130lbs, very trim, Capricorn, N/S, enjoys canoeing, backpacking, nature photography, and hiking.

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Seeking BCM, 50-55, N/S, who sees things the same as I do. ☎299661 HOPELESS ROMANTIC SBF, 25, no children, very independent, Leo, N/S, seeks BM, 26-40, N/S, with whom to share movies, dancing, and quality time. ☎300467 GET INTO THE GROOVE SWF, 43, 5’4”, 110lbs, slender, active, Capricorn, N/S, enjoys playing frisbee and nature walks. Seeking WM, 37-47, wide shoulders a+. ☎301123

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Calls cost $1.99 per min., Must be 18+.

To respond to ads using a RESPECT AND DESIRE SBM, 37, 5’8”, 164lbs, hazel eyes, Virgo, N/S, enjoys walks, traveling, mountains, cooking, candlelight dinners. Seeking hardworking SBF, 38-55, business owner, for LTR. ☎707443 HERE I AM SBM, 32, 6’9”, glasses, Aries, smoker, loves singing, drawing, and dining out.

Seeking a woman, 21-56, with whom to connect. ☎430788 SAY ‘BYE TO LONELINESS Male, 35, 5’2”, H/W proportionate, attractive, light-skinned, Leo, proportionate, smoker, seeks woman, 18-35, laid-back, committed, and faithful. ☎432003 NEVER BEEN MARRIED SWM, 40, would like to meet a woman who enjoys simple pleasures such as outdoor fun, music and exercise. ☎463381 WELL-ROUNDED SM, 27, loves art, theater, movies, music, long walks, conversation. Desires to meet attractive, cultured, social woman for dating, possibly more. ☎471543 ARE YOU THE ONE? SM, 29, enjoys tennis, movies, dancing, dining out, long walks, antiques, Asian culture. Seeking confident, sweet, goodnatured woman for LTR. ☎471619 HARD-WORKING SWCM, 48, enjoys sports, travel, dining out, dancing, reading, movies. Seeking stable, sincere woman, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. ☎474643 SOMETHING SO RIGHT SWM, 46, 5’8”, 195lbs, wants to meet a lady with good moral character, who is looking for a lasting relationship. ☎464950 I CAN COOK SWM, 51, 6’1”, 193lbs, with blue eyes and a laid-back attitude, seeks a woman with a spontaneous, creative spirit. ☎434997 TRY ME SBM, 31, enjoys sports, movies, park walks, good conversation. Seeking pretty, honest SF, to share these with. ☎448964 WANNA DANCE? SWM, 37, smoker, wants to share outdoor fun (fishing, hunting, camping), with a wonderful woman. ☎464905 YOU AND ME SWM, 34, enjoys outdoors, good times, movies, laughter, romance. Seeking loving, caring SWF, 20-50, for LTR. ☎412476 JUST FOR YOU SWM, 29, brown/green, 5’8”, 150lbs, employed, seeks outgoing, active SWF, 21-35, who can appreciate a loving man. ☎416629 COMMITMENT SM, 6’1”, 205lbs, outspoken, outgoing, very loving, looking for SF, who is not afraid of commitment, is loving and caring. ☎406726 LET’S CHAT SWM, 53, Scorpio, N/S, college-educated, easygoing, enjoys travel and beaches.

Seeking friendship, possible LTR with a WF, 45-55, N/S. ☎358466 KEEP IT SIMPLE SWM, 45, carpenter, enjoys travel, sports, fishing, dancing, music, playing cards.

Seeking SF, who enjoys the same. ☎343229 COMPATIBLE WOMAN WANTED DWM, 46, 5’9”, N/S, slim build, Capricorn, N/S, enjoys old cars, boating, classic rock, horror movies, mountains, beach. Seeking SWF, 38-46, N/S, for LTR. ☎341454 SEEKING TRUE LOVE Handsome SBM, 39, compassionate, financially secure, seeks romantic, attractive, compassionate BF, 21-45, for romantic dinners, movies, walks along the beach, true friendship, LTR. You won’t be disappointed. ☎920361 SAY YOU, SAY ME SWM, 25, 5’10”, 165lbs, medium build, brown/blue, Gemini, N/S, outgoing, energetic, seeks WF, 19-28, for friendship, possible LTR. ☎302503

YOU SUPPLY... the marshmallows. I’ll supply the bonfire, SWM, 36, truck driver, Aries, N/S, loves camping. Seeking a woman, 40-58. ☎316730 JUST YOUR AVERAGE GUY SWM, 37, N/S, likes motorcycles, fishing, camping, farming, relaxing weekends.

Seeking SWF, 25-40, to join me on life’s journey. ☎287476 LET’S FALL IN LOVE SM, 25, enjoys travel, movies, writing.

Looking for a good woman, 25-42, who shares some of these interests. ☎281603 LET’S DO LUNCH SBM, 28, Leo, homeowner, entrepreneur, attractive, seeks friendship with average, every day woman, 20-40. Have your heart talk to mine. ☎270867 SOCCER LOVER SHM, 21, 190lbs, loves to play soccer.

Seeking a woman with a good personality. ☎250070 CHEF/PIANIST 6’, 190lbs, brown/blue, handsome, amateur psychologist, nice car, time off to travel, will send photo. Seeks pretty female companion, 26-39, no kids, light smoker/drinker okay. ☎882215 IF YOU’RE READING THIS... why not give me a call? SWCM, 19, 6’, 185lbs, brown/blue, relaxed attitude, Capricorn, N/S, seeks WF, 19-25, N/S, for possible LTR. ☎938173 LET’S HOOK UP 34-year-old SBM, 5’9”, 180lbs, Aquarius, nurse, bald head, new to area, open-minded, fun-loving, hopeless romantic. Seeking woman who loves to be romanced. ☎849401 SEEKING CHRISTIAN WOMAN Friendly, committed, independent SBCM, 42, 5’11”, enjoys quiet evenings. Seeking attractive, committed, independent SBCF for friendship, possible LTR. ☎796760

A NEW START Retired, fit, outgoing GWM, 44, enjoys walks, movies, sports, reading. Seeking outgoing GM, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. ☎527836 ARE YOU THE ONE? SWM, 34, 6’1”, 195lbs dark blond/blue, goatee, enjoys quiet nights home, going out with friends, travel. Looking for masculine, easygoing SW/HM, 18-38, for casual dates, possible LTR. ☎502698 BEYOND SWM, 32, 5’11”, 155lbs, light hair, looking for good time with GM, 18-45, ☎966003 BOY NEXT DOOR SAM, 27, 5’9”, 147lbs, Sagittarius, smoker, seeks WM, 25-45, who enjoys fun times and a true friendship. ☎456425 SEEKING THE REAL THING BM, 32, 5’8”, 200lbs, enjoys reading, cooking, dining out, movies, spending quality time at home. Seeking WM, 25-35, who has similar interests, and wants a long-term, monogamous relationship. ☎389698 YOU NEVER KNOW Fun-loving, easygoing GWM, 51, 5’11”, 198lbs, enjoys cooking, movies, fishing, walking. Seeking interesting GWM, 18-33, who’s full of life, for casual relationship, possibly more. ☎676662 TAKE A CHANCE GWM, 43, 6’2”, 195lbs, black brown, seeks other GWM, for fun times and maybe something more. ☎493530 COULD IT BE YOU AND ME? GWM, 24, enjoys quiet evenings, movies, quiet evenings at home, dining out. Seeking fun, outgoing GM, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. ☎471342

How do you

LET’S MEET FOR COFFEE Good-looking GWM, 36, 6’, 200lbs, muscular, tan, enjoys working out, yard work, spending time with my dogs. Looking for attractive SM, 32-48, for dating, maybe leading to LTR. ☎436231 ME IN A NUTSHELL WM, 18, brown/blue, medium build, looking for fun, outgoing, energetic guy, 18-30, for movies, hanging out, quiet evenings at home, and more. Friends first, maybe becoming serious. ☎425471 LET’S GET CRAZY SWM, 35, 6’1”, with green eyes, is in search of a man to get together with, and share good times. ☎384239 LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIP Senior SWM seeks sincere, honest SWM, 25-45, to share home and lifestyle. Many interests including gardening, cooking, arts and crafts, travel, camping. ☎294303 ENJOYS ALL THAT LIFE HAS GWM, 40, shaved head, goatee, Pisces, smoker, seeks very special, attractive, strong, fun-loving GBM, 30-50, for dating, possible LTR. ☎257126 WHAT’S HAPPENING? SWM, 30, 5’7”, 200lbs, brown/blue, Aries, N/S, seeks BM, 19-35, N/S, outgoing, for friendship first, possible LTR. ☎958402 YOU CAN MAKE MY DAY Male, 60, Cancer, N/S, seeks a WM, 49-65, N/S, for casual relationship. Why not call me? ☎927707 DOESN’T PLAY GAMES Unattached GBM, 41, interested in meeting open-minded, fun-loving, honest, truthful, compassionate and loyal GM for LTR. ☎920995 BE YOURSELF Honest, caring SM, 47, 5’10”, 220lbs, seeks outgoing, ambitious, down-to-earth man, to share friendship, fun times and maybe more. ☎895468 IT’S YOUR CALL GWM, young 46, 5’11”, 200lbs, brown/brown, masculine, outgoing, enjoys travel, dining out, movies, shopping, Nascar. Would like to meet honest, passionate GM, with similar interests, for dating, possible LTR. Serious inquiries only. ☎792384 LOOKING FOR LOVE GWM, 41, 5’8’, 140lbs, Pisces, enjoys fishing, television, wood working, gardening, arts, crafts. Seeking GWM, 25-45, for friendship first, possible LTR. ☎705204

,call 1-866-832-4685

WAITING FOR YOU GWF, 18, 5’4”, blonde/blue, enjoys music, movies, animals, travel, dining out. Seeking outgoing, honest GF, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. ☎527575 SEEKING A RELATIONSHIP GBF, 24, enjoys dancing, sports, movies, music, quiet evenings. seeks goal-oriented GPF, 24-33, who knows what she wants. ☎474251 HAVE A GOOD TIME SB mom of two, 35, wishes to spend time, conversations, friendship and life with a great lady. ☎458794 ENDLESS POSSIBILITIES SBF, 30, 5’5”, with brown eyes, seeks a woman, 30-36, to hang out with, get to know, and see where it goes. ☎380595 WHY WAIT? SWF, 38, 5’6”,140lbs, short brown hair, easygoing, enjoys playing golf, the beach.

Seeking feminine female, 20-40, to have fun times and more. ☎448489 GOAL ORIENTED Intelligent, happy, attractive SBF, 23, student, seeks similar SBF, 24-40, N/S, for all that life has to offer. ☎411842 LOVES CHILDREN Easygoing, nice SF, 32, looking for someone with the same qualities, 29-39, and a people person. ☎388943 OPEN-MINDED CHIC Broken-hearted GWF, 30, Libra, smoker, seeks woman, 20-45, to mend my heart.

Let’s not be afraid of who we are. ☎370110 “EVERYONE’S BEST FRIEND” GWF, 26, 5’6”, medium build, likes watching movies, bowling, hanging out, malls, phone conversations. Seeking fun-loving, seriousminded GWF, 22-35, medium build, for friendship and possibly more. ☎335046 WELL-ROUNDED GWPF, 24, 4’11”, brown/brown, loves animals, movies, dancing, travel, dining out, sports, conversation. Seeking GF, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. ☎329740

BEAUTIFUL AND FEMININE GWF, 32, 5’7”, 135lbs, enjoys reading, movies, dining out, travel, sports, music, movies.

Seeking GWF, 25-39, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. ☎329063 A REFRESHING CHANGE SWF, 30, Libra, smoker, is hoping to find it in a woman, 25-45. Will show a lot of a affection. ☎307177 AVID READER Quiet SF, 24, part-time student, into all types of music, especially oldies, pets, writing poetry. Seeking a female, 24-40, with same interests. ☎283861 IS IT YOU? SGF, 42, soft stud, loves movies, cuddling, traveling, plays, comedy. Seeking feminine Christian female, compassionate and understanding, with like interests, to share friendship, good times and maybe something more. ☎487095 LOOKING FOR LOVE SBF, 32, 140lbs, 5’8”, down-to-earth, likes clubs, movies, and quiet times. Looking for a female, 30-35, with the same interests. If you’re the one, call me. Aiken, South Carolina. ☎113533 OUTGOING FUN WF, 28...

5’3”, medium build, loves movies, putt-putt golf, and bowling. Seeking WF, 25-40, medium build, for fun and friendship. Hope to hear from you soon. ☎958847 NO INTRO NEEDED SWF, 39, 5’7”, 145lbs, homeowner, easygoing, selfless, Taurus, smoker, loves movies and bowling. Seeking WF, 35-49, with comparable interests. ☎935299 I WON’T LET YOU DOWN Single GBF, 32, mother, non-smoker, looking to become acquainted with a laid-back, sensual GBF, who enjoys quiet times, movies. Interested? ☎910581 A GOOD HEART SF, 39, goes to church, works for a living, likes having fun, going on trips. Seeking a similar female, 37-49. ☎780112 GIVE ME A RING Cute SBF, 30-something, seeks attractive SF, 25-45, for friendship, maybe more. No games. ☎965825 WASTE NO TIME GBF, 36, enjoys dining out, cooking, dining out. Seeking attractive, open-minded, fun, nice GF, 25-45, for friendship and possibly more. ☎965823

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lNOT YOUR RUN-OF-THE MILL Offbeat SWM, 31, 6’2’’, artist, enjoys independent movies, museums and punk rock shows. Seeking SF who is into art, music, and anarchy.

48142

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Classifieds Alt. Lifestyles

Equipment

If You’re not Partying at Argos, The Tower of Argos or at The Shack…

AFFORDABLE • CONVIENENT Tan At Home Payments From $25/month FREE Color-Catalog Call Today 1-800-842-1305 (06/26#8100)

Fri

DJ Chip

Thu

Karaoke Dance Party with DJ Joe Steel.

Sat

DJ Buckwheat

Fri

4th of July Celebration Bar-b-que starts at 6pm Huge extravaganza show

Sun

Karaoke 8-12 with DJ Joe

Sat

Miss Argos Pagent

Every weekend come see who is dancing in the cages!

Argos welcomes Gay, Lesbian, Bi, BDSM, Swingers, TVTS & all openminded patrons

Call us @ 481-8829 or email us at ClubArgos@aol.com

Mind, Body & Spirit

Come have fun where the party doesn’t end!

MRS. GRAHAM

... You’re Not Partying

THE COLISEUM

Premier Entertainment Complex & High Energy Dance Music Red, White & You Weekend Friday, 7/4 Barbra Barranger Saturday, 7/5 Lauren Alexander

Drink Specials: WED $9 Wet N' Wild SAT All You Can Drink Well/Liquor/Draft $9

Open Mon-Fri 8pm-3am Sat 8pm-2:30am

Fri & Sat. No Cover Before 10 p.m.

1632 Walton Way • Augusta, GA

Medical 3 Wheel Scooter Electric, like new, Heavy Duty.

Reasonably Priced.

706-733-3778 (07/17#8142)

(803) 441-0053 425 Carolina Springs Rd North Augusta, SC

WE’RE BACK! Free Cover w/ Coupon

For 21 & Over and Non-Members

MARLBORO STATION 141 Marlboro Station, Aiken S.C.

803-644-6485

18 to Party • 21 to Drink

706-733-2603

Email: ColiseumAugusta@aol.com

••••• ••••• thank you • • • • • ••••• ••••• FOR SUPPORTING OUR ADVERTISERS

Miscellaneous For Sale

READINGS BY

C A R D R E A D I N G S

Mrs. Graham, Psychic Reader, Advises on all affairs of life, such as love, marriage, and business. She tells your past, present and future. Mrs. Graham does palm, tarot card, and crystal readings. She specializes in relationships and reuniting loved ones.

341 S. Belair Rd. Open from 9 a.m. til 9 p.m.

Call (706) 733-5851

Full Body Massage!

Therapeutic tension relief, intense or tender touch, rela xing music, aromatherapy, by appointment only - $49.00/hr.

Call Joy - 706-771-9470 or John - 706-868-5598 (07/03#8120

www.metrospirit.com

Medical Equipment

Her showcast is not just Drag it’s pure talent.

Come let us entertain you.

Show starts at 12:30am.

COMING EVENTS

Fri, July 11

Now Hiring!

X-Mar t Currently hiring full time clerks.

Neat appearance, cashier experience preferred.

Apply in person 1367 Gordon Highway.

For directions call 706-774-9755 (7/31#8103)

Sasha Sundays

Argos Angels’ Cabaret hosted by Petite, Claire Storm, Sasha and other guests

Professional Massage By experienced male.

Designed for healthy men 18 - 45.

A great way to rela x House & Hotel Calls Only 706-589-9139 (07/03#8147)

$250 - $500 a Week Will train to work at home helping the US Government file HUD/FHA Mor tgage Refunds.

No experience necessary. Call 1-800-778-0353 (07/03#8134)

Monday-Sunday Happy Hour from 4pm-12 midnight $2 Long necks $3 Wells

Wed Sasha & Co Talent Show

Now at Sacred Space 206 8th St. (706) 556-8490

SPECIAL READINGS WITH CARD

1923 Walton Way • Open Mon-Fri for Happy Hour @ 6:00pm with $1 off everything Every Fri & Sat Garage Party from 9-10 with all drinks only $1 (Everything $1)

Bhakti Yoga

Help Wanted

You’ll Be Back

Call 738-1142 to place your Classified ad today!

Mind, Body & Spirit

WOLFF TANNING BEDS

The Shack ...

Club Argos Dance Club & The Tower of Argos Leather Bar Augusta’s Premier Progressive House Dance & Entertainment Zone with DJ Joe Steel.

47

Golf Clubs: Nike Drivey, 9.5 degree stiff graphite $140; Top Flight Irons, S.S. rifle shots $140. Also callaway woods. Les 860-3387 (08/14#8133) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Black Jump Boots. Never Worn. $25.00 706798-7954 (07/24#8115) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Regency Crystal Police Scanner. Base or mobile, receives Aiken County agencies. $35.00. 706-798-7954. (07/17#8112) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Bedroom Suite, dresser, chest of drawers & headboard. All 3 pieces $50.00 912-829-3226 or 912-829-4556 (07/10#8105) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Snap-On IM51 Air Impact Wrench, 1/2” drive, good condition, $75.00. National Detroit DA Air Sander, good condition, $60.00 Ask for Larry (813)391-9580. (07/10#8106) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Tons of Cloth! All types/pat terns good grade material. Will sell all for $35.00, 912-829-3226 or 912-829-4556 (07/10#8104) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Dining Room Table - Never used, rectangular solid light wood. Seats 4-6, paid $200.00, sell for $75.00 OBO. Silver Sony CD Car Stereo, w/ remote, paid $200.00, sell for $75.00 OBO. 706-799-0417.

(06/26#8083)

Begin a New Career In Massage Therapy Train for a rewarding career in Massage Therapy in only 6 months

733-2040

Augusta School of Massage Inc. 3512 1/2 Wheeler Road • Augusta, GA 30909

Private Investigator R AY WILLIAMSON & ASSOCIATES Private Investigations 17 years experience Domestic Relations and Child Custody Cases Licensed and Bonded in Georgia & Carolina 706-854-9672 or 706-854-9678 fa x (07/03#8155)

Real Estate Business For Sale Income Proper ty in Wadley, Ga Gameroom & Family Cafe, Both Rented. Six 1-room furnished apar tments, Four rented.

Assessed at over $100,000.

Make of fer, willing to negotiate.

478-237-5986 (07/03#8132)

Religion Metropolitan Community Church of Our Redeemer A Christian Church reaching to all: including Gay, Lesbian, and Transgendered Christians.

Meeting at 311 Seventh Street, 11 am and 7 pm each Sunday. 722-6454 MCCAugusta@aol.com www.mccoor.com

Resort Rentals Amelia Island, Florida 2 Bedroom 2 bath direct ocean front condo in the hear t of historical Fernandina Beach, Florida. A convenient location without the crowds.

736-7070 -----------560-8980 (06/26#8122)

Call 738-1142 to place your Classified ad!

Services W. Brack!

Lawn Care/Landscapes 6 Years Experience Services include Lawnmowing, Edging, Weedeating and Hedgework.

Flowers, Trees, Shrubs and Bed Construction.

Free Estimates!

706-592-1273 Bonded and Insured (07/10#8137) Karaoke/DJ Bars, Clubs & Private Par ties Flexable Pricing 706-394-4579 (7/10#8138)

Travel

M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 3 2 0 0 3

Tropical Luau Party Saturday, July 12

Dress in your Hawaiian shirts, swimsuits, bikinis or whatever puts you in the island mood. $5 Cover with island wear/$10 without.

Live Entertainment by Ras Bonghi Reggae Allstars & Island DJ.

706.303.9700 • 813 broad www.modjeskalounge.com

• Complimentary Hors d’oeuvres • Lots of Tropical Drinks • Limbo Contest • Complimentary Rum Punch from 9-10 for the Ladies • Doors Open at 8pm • Limited Occupancy - Come Early