Metro Spirit 07.25.2002 by Metro Spirit

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THE METROPOLITAN

ARTS, ISSUES & ENTERTAINMENT

WILL

M AYO R B O B SURVIVE?

P. 10

S K Y REALLY FA L L I N G ?

IS THE BY BRIAN NEILL

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Contents The Metropolitan Spirit

JULY 25-31, 2002

FREE WEEKLY

3 M E T R O S P I R I T

METSPIRIT.COM

ON THE COVER

Is the Sky Really Falling? By Brian Neill.......................................................16 Cover Design: Stephanie Carroll

Meteor Photograph Source: U.S. Geological Survey

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Opinion Whine Line ......................................................................4 Words ..............................................................................4 Thumbs Up, Thumbs Down ..........................................4 This Modern World ........................................................4 Suburban Torture ...........................................................7 Letter to the Editor .........................................................7 Austin Rhodes ................................................................8 Insider ...........................................................................10

Annual Clearance Sale at Gerald Jones Honda

Metro Beat

Up Close with Russell Joel Brown ..............................12 Coliseum Authority Embarrassed By Conference's Failings ..........................................................................14 Laney-Walker Accuses HND of Losing $395,000 .....15

Arts

Atlantis and Ozzfest Around the Corner ....................20 Augusta Artist and Musician Seeks His Fortune in Nashville .......................................................................22 Four Plays, Four Bucks ................................................24

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Augusta Artist and Musician Seeks His Fortune in Nashville.................22

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Movie Listings .............................................................26 Review: The Country Bears ........................................28 Preview: Austin Powers in Goldmember ...................29 Movie Clock ..................................................................30

Events

8 Days a Week .............................................................31

Music

Two Big Local Music Events This Weekend ..............34 Music By Turner ............................................................37 “Busted Stuff” By Dave Matthews Is a Heavy Little Gym ......................................................................38 Nightlife ........................................................................ 39

Stuff

News of the Weird .......................................................42 Brezsny's Free Will Astrology .....................................43 New York Times Crossword Puzzle ............................43 Amy Alkon: The Advice Goddess ................................44 Classifieds ....................................................................45 Date Maker ...................................................................46

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EDITOR & PUBLISHER David Vantrease ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Rhonda Jones STAFF WRITERS Stacey Eidson, Brian Neill ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER Joe White ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Kriste Lindler PRODUCTION MANAGER Joe Smith GR APHIC ARTISTS Stephanie Carroll, Natalie Holle ASSISTANT TO THE PUBLISHER Meli Gurley RECEPTIONIST/CLASSIFIED COORDINATOR Sharon King ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT ASSISTANT Lisa Jordan CIRCULATION DIRECTOR Meli Gurley SENIOR MUSIC CONTRIBUTOR Ed Turner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Chuck Shepherd, Rob Brezsny, Austin Rhodes, Amy Alkon, Rachel Deahl CARTOONISTS Tom Tomorrow, Julie Larson

THE METROPOLITAN SPIRIT is a free newspaper published weekly on Thursday, 52 weeks of the year. Editorial coverage includes ar ts, local issues, news, enter tainment, people, places and events. In our paper appear views from across the political and social spectrum. The views do not necessarily represent the views of the publishers. Visit us at www.metspirit.com. Copyright © The Metropolitan Spirit Inc. Reproduction or use without permission is prohibited. Phone: (706) 738-1142 Fax: (706) 733-6663 E-mail: spirit@metspirit.com Letters to the Editor: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, Ga. 30914-3809

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Whine Line Thumbs Up For more than a month, AugustaRichmond County Tax Assessor Sonny Reece wrestled with the Augusta Commission to reclassify and upgrade the salaries of a handful of employees in his department. Previous administrations had operated with salary inequities and, as a result, when Reece took over the department, he realized some of his employees in subordinate positions for short periods of time were making more than senior employees with years under their belts. On July 18, Reece’s persistence paid off. The commission finally approved his request. Employees of the tax assessor’s office should not only be happy they got their salaries adjusted, but they should be thrilled that they have a boss willing to go to bat for them.

Thumbs Down A staff member beating a patient with an aluminum pipe and the failure to supervise another patient, who in turn, jumped or fell out of a window, were among the allegations outlined in an article in The Augusta Chronicle detailing recent problems at Gracewood State School and Hospital. The article said that the facility has been criticized for having too small a staff to operate effectively and could lose its state funding.

strongly urge Mayor Young not to run for mayor of Augusta again. Don’t waste taxpayer time and money. If you have the will to write a letter representing Augusta, with the knowledge that what you are writing is a lie, then who knows what you will do or have already done? For our city to grow in the direction it needs to, then we need to remove people like Bob Young from our government. Marion Williams is an idiot and a racist. Who’s he trying to fool? If Ronnie Few were white he (Marion Williams) would be leading the mob to lynch him. How can the citizens of Augusta continue to put up with someone such as him? He is a disgrace. Do Augusta a favor, Marion, and move to another state! Now House District 79 has essentially two Democrats running for office — Terry Holley and Barry “Brighthead” Fleming. If Fleming wins, the voters can be assured he has been well-trained by his cohorts, Ben Harbin and Robin Williams, on how to get fat at the feeding trough! Don’t you think that the music editor should know the music scene well enough not to run an old picture of The Big Mighty with two members that are no longer in the band? Very sloppy work! To all of you upset about the new porn shop: Obviously the owners think there is enough interest in this kind of thing in the Augusta area or they wouldn’t open such a business. Maybe not everyone is as allergic to sex as you born-again hypocrites are! The tale of two counties: Richmond County has just learned the effect of having government politics involved in the quality of emergency services. Columbia County is now — under the supposed Republican Party — trying to take over the fire services. This is the same county government who turned over rescue services to these fire departments, and has to rely on these fire departments to support

W O R D S “I’m unbought and unbossed.” — Charles Walker Jr.,candidate for the 12th U.S. Congressional District, addressing the Richmond County Democratic Par ty on the morning of July 20.

“Any candidate for this office that has raised $400,000 for this campaign is bought and bossed.” — Rober t Finch, Walker’s opponent in the race, speaking at the same meeting. Finch is a former staf fer for Walker’s father, state Sen. Charles Walker. The younger Walker has raised just over $350,000 for his congressional run.

“It gets in your blood ... I’m fascinated by cars. I love cars.” — Darwin Schneider, under indictment in the case involving Two State Construction of Thomson, as quoted in a 1999 business story in The Augusta Chronicle after opening the Evans Diner in Columbia County. Schneider is alleged in the indictment to have used money gained from defrauding pharmaceutical giant Monsanto/Searle to open the diner, which later came under different ownership. He also used ill-gotten funds to buy a number of fancy cars like a Corvette and a Dodge Viper, the indictment states.

ambulance services. The lessons learned: They cannot handle the responsibility but they want the money. If you love the tax system and storm drainage system now, wait until Columbia County can jack up our taxes and tell you it is for “improved fire services.” It’s about time for Bonnie Ruben to be off the Coliseum Authority. She and Bill Maddox have done nothing to improve the civic center in all their time on the board. It’s time for them to leave and let others do the job! D.C. now knows Bob Young can lie. Is this Washington material or what? I have a high regard for The Metropolitan Spirit and I understand why you publish the rubbish from Austin Rhodes’ bigoted mind. It causes controversy and controversy increases interest and readership of The Spirit. However, one article a week

from this egotistical racist is more than enough. Just because there were two news items (in the July 11-17 issue) that gave Rhodes another opportunity to reveal his male chauvinist and racist attitudes is not sufficient reason to allow him to write two articles in the same issue. Nevertheless, I really enjoyed seeing a Republican redneck talk show host blast a Republican redneck mayor. It’s way past time to abolish the Richmond County Civic Center Coliseum Authority. Make it a city department, hire a director, and put Chief Maddox out to pasture once and for all. Please Spirit, leave Ronnie Few alone. He’s been gone over a year and 70 percent of the public is tired of hearing about it. You’ve got politicians and presidents who have done a lot worse. Try Richard Nixon and Bill Clinton. Did Mr. Few mug anyone, or rape anyone or

molest anyone? Those are offenses worth writing about. The world will keep turning; stocks will rise or fall and another child will be born. Let’s move on, please. This is for the person who wrote the ‘Thumbs Up” and “Thumbs Down.” The minutes are kept by a person who can tell you who voted for what. Any time you want to know what the count was, please call the civic center. I’ll be more than happy to give you the vote and how the meeting went. Why hasn’t the fire department's transit house, for families who are displaced after a fire, not been completed after all these years? I drive by it several times a week. It’s empty and doesn’t even have power going to it. Please check this out. I have a whine for Columbia County traffic folks. Only eight cars can get through on Washington Road making a left turn onto Baston Road. You have to sit through four or five lights before you can take a left. Something needs to be done! To the person regarding the adult bookstore. There are no homes around that store. There are a couple of motels and a few businesses and that is all. I don’t know what everybody is fussing about. I don’t read pornography but it’s not going to hurt the residential section of town. They should be allowed to open their business. The Committee of 100, not the Chamber of Commerce, was responsible for all the

new industry in Richmond County back in the early ’50s. We need another Committee of 100 if we are interested in obtaining new industry for this area. Columbia Countians were really disappointed to learn Judge Fleming appointed Lynn Allgood and Neil Dickert to our county. We were hoping that Jim Blanchard and Duncan Wheale would be appointed. I agree with the person who said the name “Black Supremacy Nation” offended them, because if there was a building that said “White Supremacy Nation,” the NAACP would be all over it. Hey Paul. I just heard Channel 12’s Laurie Ott “regret the error” on the 11 p.m. news just now in telling its viewers of “KKK and hate literature” named at your place that was not found to be present after all! A public, on-air apology from a TV journalist, from the anchordesk at that! How ‘bout them apples? As for the print, I never even got an acknowledgement from the folks at The “Comical” last week when I e-chastized the metro page on this very topic! How about all the pompous TV commercials about how the present governor has improved the education system, taken the best lottery system and made it better? A better theory would be that education has not improved through the efforts of the governor. He may have put more obstacles and committees into the education process (which does nothing for improving students’ knowledge). The lottery

system is now overburdened with new benefits to “tech schools” who can reap benefits by having a student sign up but not necessarily learn. It is a case of, “Work the system. Crunch numbers. It will look good on paper.” Ed McIntyre continues to pay a big price for his mistake, even after 20 years. The God I serve is a second-chance God. As an educated person of AfricanAmerican descent I’m appalled and embarrassed by the mere suggestion of this Black Supremacy Nation. Who does this Amon-Ra think he is? He left Arizona and came to Augusta to wreak havoc only to wag his venomous tongue and go back. I’ve lived in Augusta peacefully for the past 33 years. Racism still exists, I know, but this will only fuel the fire if we let it. Hopefully there are other African-Americans who feel the same as I do and won’t give him any gas. My parents and their parents have lived here all their lives. And they endured enough racism in their time. My parents worked hard to send me to school and I am most thankful that (when I was) growing up they showed me I could overcome any obstacles that came my way by working hard and learning. And do not to take the coward's way out by continuing to blame others. As I said before, racism still exists and ignorance is still colorblind. Columbia County Transit drivers need to turn down their radios. When someone pays a fare to be transported they shouldn’t have to listen to loud music.

I see only one way to solve this problem with these commissioners. If they want more power than the mayor, they should have to be county-elected just like the mayor. Also does anybody remember Robin Williams getting all the airline tickets and vacations to resorts for himself and his family? I think everybody has forgotten about that and it’s time for people to remember. Who is really running for mayor? I think we should still support Mayor Bob Young because he is the best candidate. So what if he sent a recommendation? At least he kept the city from being sued, and believe me Ronnie Few would sue. Reading your article in the latest Spirit was very interesting. The article pertaining to Commissioner Marion Williams. He said, “I’m not going to defend anybody for doing something wrong. If Chief Few did something illegal then he is wrong, but as for right now, I support Chief Few.” Is he a reverend or a politician? Commissioner Williams needs to step down. Recall, recall. Now we have commissioners, our own elected officials who have destroyed Augusta, because of their unethical practices. They have torn Augusta apart because of one man who has destroyed the name of the fire department. Those commissioners who have destroyed our city and made us look bad need to be recalled out of office. continued on page 6

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lights. Even the newest vehicles are without them. It’s too bad, because signals are a great way to keep people informed of what you are going to do — that is, if you really do make a turn in the direction your signal indicates. Also, turning off the signal light when the turn is complete will help you avoid traffic accidents.

I don’t live in Augusta; I live in South Carolina and I’m glad. The situation in Augusta is terrible. They need a whole new council. It’s not going to get better if they don’t.

Why are so many deputies being fired in Columbia County? Could it be that maybe the sheriff wants to keep the citizens' attention on the small guys, instead of where it needs to be?

Austin Rhodes is the biggest race-baiter in Augusta Georgia. If he doesn’t like it here he needs to get his tail out of town. Whoever lets him in your newspaper, which is otherwise a fine newspaper, should lose their job. He obviously pays you all to print his articles. The only blacks he cares about are the ones that hate other blacks. If he spent his time more wisely trying to find a solution for the problem instead of trying to aggravate it, things might get better.

Why is everyone so hell-bent on calling everything that they don’t agree with racism? The mess with Ronnie Few and the fire department is just plain illegal (some portions) and wrong.

A word of advice for the mothers who feel like they have to leave their children in the car for a few minutes while they go into the store: Why don’t you wait to run your errands until after they have been fed and had their naps? When did it become illegal to possess white supremacy literature in your home? While the Richmond County investigators are on a racist witch-hunt, maybe they ought to check out the Black Supremacy Nation on Martin Luther King Boulevard. Their name says it all. Augusta National: Hootie and the Blowhards. Until Augustans have elected officials with some sense you will be a polluted backwater (town) in this state. Until The Chronicle stops representing Augusta as a homophobic, bigoted city, you will be a polluted backwater (town) in this state. Why will nobody who has any intellect run for office? Because they may be elected and be forced to serve on a council or board of education with the schmoes already there! Vote anti-incumbent for the next several elections and maybe candidates with some sense will begin to run. Signed: A Former Augustan (Glad to be gone.) I don’t know what Professor Ralph Walker is smoking, but if he thinks the public is going to forget the special grand jury report by the time the mayoral election rolls around in November — he needs to kick the habit. Insiders say the special grand jury will release its long-awaited report on the city’s purchasing department before November. If half of what some suspect is true, it’s going to wake up a lot of voters to the corruption going on inside the Marble Palace. I wonder who Bob Young and the black commissioners will blame this one on? The people of the CSRA have lots of defective vehicles. They lack signal

I, for one, can think of at least one “Thumbs Up.” How about the countless participants, organizers, volunteers and supporters for the XII Georgia Games? What is the deal with this Black Supremacy Nation? Does the Columbia County scheme to put a bike path from Evans to the pavilion include a requirement for bike traffic control — simple things like yield and stop signs, as are used at Hilton Head? If not, there ought to be a ton of wrecks before the “path” is even finished for there are fools out there on eight-pound bikes that are dumb enough to argue with two-ton trucks. Looks like Columbia County Republican Chairman Alvin Starks has put the local politicians on notice “that issues are important.” He managed this feat through a series of preferential Questions on the primary ballot. The real question will be: How will the candidates respond, dance, and sing between August and November? Just a note for the guy who seems to be concerned about the influx of homosexuals to Atlanta, and the inevitable increase of AIDS that he believes will ensue. Educate yourself. The largest group of people becoming infected with the AIDS virus is heterosexual men and women between the ages of 18 and 25. Ignorance is not bliss. The homophobia and small-minded thinking that exist here in Augusta never ceases to amaze me. People write in to whine about the very diversity that made this country the greatest in the world. Gay pride is not a closet thing any more than it is a bedroom thing. It's a group of people who live with like circumstances getting together to celebrate, discuss and enjoy life for a few days in an environment where they are not made to feel out of place. Being gay in Augusta is like being black at a KKK rally. Get over it Augusta. We’re not going away. — Call our Whine Line at 510-2051 and leave your comments. We won’t use your name. Fax your whines by dialing (706) 733-6663 or e-mail your whines to whine@metspirit.com

www.metspirit.com

Suburban Torture

Letter to the Editor

by Julie Larson

M E T R O

Questions City's Economic Development Office

see that Mayor Bob Young and some of the Augusta Commissioners are joining forces with state Sen. Charles Walker and City Administrator George Kolb to add more employees to the already bloated city-county payroll. They propose to call this new department an “economic development office” to be run by another high-priced, “outside expert” hired by Kolb. For starters, they’ll add three new people and another $400,000 in yearly costs to the annual operating budget. Its mission? They claim that hasn’t been determined yet, but I think you can guess whose economic interest they’ll be working on. We have some so-called “public servants” at City Hall who don’t understand the concept and purpose of consolidation. We, the taxpayers, want a smaller and more efficient government. They want “more” government (it’s now much larger than the old county and city government payroll combined), because

S P I R I T

it allows them to create more jobs (it’s called political patronage) for their cronies. Besides, the boys know the taxpayers are footing all the bills and they can count on the fact that we’re naïve enough to keep electing them back into office. Don’t be fooled by the ruse they’re trying to pull with their claims that the Augusta Metro Chamber of Commerce isn’t doing its job. The mayor and some commissioners are mad because the chamber had the courage to get involved in the failed attempt to convince the local legislative delegation to institute muchneeded local governmental reforms. This is nothing more than a way for the gang running City Hall to engage in a cockfight — at our expense. Call Mayor Young and your Augusta commissioner today and let them know how you feel about them wasting our tax money. It’s time we put an end to this foolishness and time for us to let them know who can vote them out of office. — Sonny Pittman

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s an older, supposedly educated black man living in the South, Lee Beard should know the meaning of the word oppressed. The Augusta City Commissioner obviously does not. Speaking to the local chapter of the NAACP Monday night, Beard finally got down to brass tacks in discussing the findings of Richmond County’s Special Grand Jury. In previous press reports, Beard had worn his ignorance of the document and its conclusions like a badge of honor. In a July 14th Augusta Chronicle article, Heidi Williams quoted Beard: “‘I’ve looked out for this city so far, and I think I’ve done the right thing,’ he said, adding that he has not read the grand jury report. ‘I haven’t had the time...I don’t feel in any rush to look at it.’” That was some five days after the report was released. Finally, the busiest man in city government got around to reading it. He apparently had a few problems with what he read. Imagine that. To summarize for those who have been under a rock: The Special Grand jury has concluded that former Augusta Fire Chief Ronnie Few was likely an incompetent, bullying thief, who wouldn’t know the truth if it were on fire in front of him. According to Beard, the entire report is a racist sham intended to drag black leaders through the mud for the sport of it. He also wonders why other departments, aside from the Fire Department, haven’t come under such scrutiny. Ah, but wait Commissioner, they have. More reports are on the way. In the meantime, Beard and other black leaders are screaming “frame up” louder than Johnnie Cochran. Hell, if it worked for him, why couldn’t it work again? There have been plenty of unfortunate historic examples of blacks facing real discrimination and oppression in our fair city. The former Augusta city fire and police departments were notorious for racist decision-making and employment practices. The rest of local government had its share of the “plantation mentality” as well. The fact that black men and women now help run the city’s personnel infrastructure has made that type of activity a thing of the past. Ironically, the door is now swinging the other way. While many black leaders are celebrating the fact that the rednecks are now getting a buttload of their own medicine, keep in mind that only juvenile minds believe two wrongs make a right. If it was wrong for whites to be heavy-handed and exclusionary, and it was, it is also wrong for blacks. It is funny watching Beard and company complain that the scrutiny Few is now facing is some sort of racial vendetta against a poor black man. As Few drives his Lexus around Augusta we are all reminded that he had the chance to do well in his prosperous new positions, in both Augusta and Washington, D.C., and in fact it was his own web of lies that undid him in both places. Was Few’s demise in D.C. a racist plot as

well? There might be those who believe that. Unfortunately for them, their theories are vaporized when you consider the fact that white folks are the oppressed minority in D.C. Oops. Why do black leaders have such a hard time accepting that one of their own can be crooked, and deal with them accordingly? White folks cut their crooked leaders loose PDQ, at least conservative white folks do. In 1984, two of Augusta’s most prominent politicians go to the Federal pokey on corruption charges. Former Sheriff J.B. Dyches (white) is never heard from again. Former Mayor Ed McInytre (black) has been a hair’s breadth from returning to office three times, and still wields considerable political power. State Representative Robin Williams (white) is turned out of office mainly because of a few character questions, certainly nothing major, but troubling to many in his conservative constituency. State Senator Charles Walker (black) is accused by no less than The Atlanta Journal-Constitution as being one of the most corrupt politicians in recent state history. He becomes a millionaire by becoming a middleman between publicly funded programs and the people they are designed to assist, all while controlling the funding of those programs. Walker remains in office, more popular than chocolate ice cream, and until this year, hasn’t faced a serious challenge. Augusta City Commissioner Jerry Brigham (white) is removed ostensibly because he was not effective in fighting some of the political trash perpetrated by the likes of fellow commissioner Lee Beard (black). Beard the Trash Man, meanwhile, is returned to office in a landslide. Augusta is no isolated example of such phenomena. Think of the Republicans who have seen their careers crash and burn following personal misbehavior. Mike Bowers, Newt Gingrich, and most recently Cleve Mobley are great examples. In the meantime, the Democratic leadership is a Who’s Who of drug abuse, marital infidelity, and even homicide. Georgia Lt. Governor Mark Taylor, President Bill Clinton, Senator Ted Kennedy. You get the point. Even when liberal leadership is confirmed in their misdeeds, they return to power unabated. Minority leaders love to point the finger at the “establishment” when the investigations begin, even though their constituents routinely ignore the sins once uncovered. If Lee Beard wants the world to believe black folks are victimized by the racist Augusta power structure, he needs to do a better job of articulating who is to blame. Last time I looked, black folks were pretty much running things around here. From Charles Walker to George Kolb to Charles Larke to five Augusta City Commissioners. Black, black, black and black. — The views expressed in this column are the views of the writer and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher. The archived Austin Rhodes columns can now be seen at www.wgac.com.

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10 M E T R O S P I R I T

Opinion: Insider

Will Mayor Bob Survive?

J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

Mayor Bob Young

ugusta Mayor Bob Young has made a career of placing his foot in his mouth. Time after time during his term as mayor he has allowed his tongue or his pen to create needless problems. His friends and detractors alike have come to realize that this trait is one of his biggest liabilities. Young’s latest misstep involving the letter of recommendation for former Fire Chief Ronnie Few and his subsequent explanation of his intentions may prove to be Young’s downfall. The former head of the Political Science Department at Augusta State University, political guru Ralph Walker was quoted in The Augusta Chronicle as saying this incident will not impact Young’s re-election bid. However, the word on the street is quite different. Whether Young’s handling of the Few fiasco costs him the election is a question yet to be answered, but there is no doubt that the incident will cost him votes. The conventional wisdom is that voters have a short attention span. While this is true, Young’s opponents will use every opportunity from now until the November election to remind voters of the mayor’s inept handling of his “Few Problem.” This issue will stick to Young like velcro. Why? Consider these points. First, Young made an error in judgment by writing a glowing testimonial for Few, who was leaving Augusta under a cloud of suspicion. His explanation that he did it to rid the city of Few was pitifully weak and nobody bought it. Then the mayor blamed the city of Washington, D.C., and the recruiting firm who recommended Few for not contacting him for more details. He contradicted himself throughout his various explanations and was not immediately forthcoming with all the details surrounding the episode, eliciting charges he lied. Throughout his tenure as mayor, citizens have overlooked Young’s asinine behavior.

Local folks have credited him with being honest and a good representative of Augusta. In the Few incident Hizzoner fails on both counts. As the head guy for Augusta, A City of Character, he really blew it this time. In the last two weeks many former supporters of Young have indicated privately that they are wavering in their support. Some of these people are looking for a new candidate to enter the race, one who can appear like a knight in shining armor to help rid Augusta of its political stench. Many other voters who turned out for Young in his first election are indicating they will support Robin Williams this year. Young has lost some of his support. He will certainly lose votes because of his latest image-tarnishing behavior. Some people have simply had enough of Mayor Bob. Barbara Dooley vs. Max Burns Long before either Barbara Dooley or Max Burns considered entering the Republican primary for the newly created U.S. 12th Congressional District, Rep. Charles Norwood (R-Ga) mobilized Republican troops to get behind Burke Countian Cleve Mobley as the candidate for the job. A large amount of energy, money, and political capital was expended to ready the novice candidate for battle. Then, overnight, the revelation of personal domestic problems and alcoholrelated runins with the law prompted Mobley to back out of the race. Norwood Barbara Dooley and his sup-

porters who touted Mobley as the chosen one were embarrassed by the chain of events. How could Norwood and company, who undoubtedly checked Mobley’s background, allow themselves to become tied to this potential candidate? Were they naive, inept, or just so interested in electing “their guy” that they thought nobody would notice? While the brouhaha surrounding Mobley was simmering in the background U.S. Congressman Jack Kingston (R-Ga) approached Barbara Dooley to run for the seat. She indicated that she would not enter the race as long as Mobley was in it but if anything happened to Mobley, she would consider running. From that point, political insiders suggest that Kingston’s supporters went to work to leak negative information about Mobley that was bound to come out eventually, in an attempt to get him out of the race. It worked. Mobley fled the scene and Dooley announced her intentions to seek the office. Dooley is an independent woman with a successful radio talk show in Athens, Ga. She is the wife of former University of Georgia Bulldog football coach Vince Dooley. Her supporters tout that her name recognition, charisma, contacts throughout the district, and the fact that she is a woman are major assets to her candidacy. Back to Norwood: Embarrassed and angry, Norwood and his people went to work to get their own candidate to oppose Dooley. They found Max Burns, a resident of Screven County who is a businessmanfarmer and teaches at Georgia Southern. He formerly served on the Screven County Commission from 1993-1998. Burns supporters say his business and government experience makes him more qualified than Dooley. The only benefits of Republican candidates competing in this primary is that it will force them to get their campaign organizations in place and increase their name recognition while they hone their skills for the November election. The downside to the primary is that Dooley and Burns will beat up on each other and spend thousands and thousands of dollars needlessly. Why couldn’t the Republicans come together and agree on one candidate? Egos? Ideology? All the above? In the background, this is a battle between Norwood and Kingston to see who can wield the most power. It is ego and power all the way. Then there is the matter of ideology. Norwood and his supporters have told Dooley that “she isn’t Republican enough.” Exactly what that means they aren’t saying publicly, yet. Apparently, the fact that Burns was elected to the Screven County Commission as a Democrat before switching to the Republican Party qualifies him to be “Republican enough.” The Norwood crowd is often out of touch

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with those voters who view themselves as Republicans or independents but are not affiliated with any party and who may not be quite as conservative as the right-wing element of the GOP. Chances are that Dooley is “Republican enough” for many of these folks. It will take these voters, along with disenchanted Democrats, to elect a Republican in November from a district that was drawn specifically for Democrats. On the surface, Dooley appears to be the Republican candidate with the best chance to win in November. The Governor’s Race It appears that gubernatorial candidate Linda Schrenko is finally getting some respect in her attempt to become the Republican nominee for governor. Armed with $300,000 and high name recognition, the feisty former state School Superintendent and Augusta resident has been labeled the front-runner by political pundit Bill Shipp, whose opinions are revered by many people involved in Georgia politics. Schrenko has come a long way since she was virtually abandoned by the Republican establishment, including (once again) Rep. Linda Schrenko Charlie Norwood. Norwood encouraged former Georgia legislator Sonny Perdue to enter the race and supports him over Schrenko or Bill Byrne, the third candidate. Charlie Norwood Interestingly, Perdue is a Democrat recently turned Republican. He must be “Republican enough.” It will be interesting to see if one of the three GOP hopefuls wins the primary without a runoff. If either Schrenko or Byrne is in a runoff against Perdue expect them to join forces to beat him. Neither of them want Perdue as the Republican nominee. —The views expressed in this column are the views of The Insider and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

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12 M E T R O S P I R I T

UpClose

With Russell Joel Brown

J U L Y

BY LISA JORDAN

2 5 2 0 0 2

ussell Joel Brown sits at an outdoor table on Broad Street, armed with a series of photographs that chronicle his life on the road. "This is from ‘Big River,’" he says. "It’s the musical adventures of Huck Finn, and I did that at Carousel Dinner Theatre in Akron, Ohio." Brown pulls another photograph from the stack. "This is from ‘Smokey Joe’s Café.’ I did the first national tour of that show, and we did it in Japan, also. "This is from ‘The Scarlet Pimpernel,’ which is the last show I did before I came to Augusta. I was on the first national tour of that show." But far from bragging about his success as an actor, Brown comes across as humble, understated. Above all, he’s genuinely in love with theatre. Though Brown calls New York City his second home, he’s an Augusta native, graduating from Aquinas and then from Morehouse College in Atlanta. "When I was growing up, I really wanted to be a ballet dancer," Brown says. "My sister Karen is a professional ballerina – well, she was; she retired in 1995 – and so she studied here with Ron Colton at the Augusta Ballet and she

went to New York to study with Arthur Mitchell at the Dance Theatre of Harlem." On a visit to see Karen perform, Brown found himself amazed at the gender diversity in the New York ballet world. "I had always enjoyed seeing her dance here with the Augusta Ballet in ‘The Nutcracker’ and other performances, but when I went to New York, I was just blown away," he recalls. "In Augusta, we had men onstage in ballet, but not very many. And so many of the men who were onstage came from Atlanta. "I went to New York and it was almost half and half, men and women, and I couldn’t believe so many guys were onstage." Once home, Brown enrolled in ballet and studied with Colton at the Augusta Ballet for eight years. He was also active musically, taking piano and chorus. "I hadn’t really ever thought of doing it as a career," Brown says of his talents. "I thought that I would go and dance with my sister and we’d be a brother/sister team in ballet. But then when it came time to go to college, I just went on to college." After putting in some time working in corporate America, Brown decided to take a chance in the big city.

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"I thought, ‘I really have to try it to see whether I can make it,’" Brown says. "I’m really glad that I did." After an overwhelming four months in New York, Brown headed to Dallas and performed five shows in six months. "It’s unheard of outside of New York or L.A. that you would do that many shows in such a short period of time," Brown says, adding that Dallas was experiencing a theatre renaissance at the time. When fate brought some New Yorkbased actors Brown’s way, they convinced him to give the city one more try. "You can’t tell whether you’re ready for New York outside of New York," Brown says. "You have to go to New York. And so I moved back to New York … and I got a job in two weeks and got my equity card and I was on my way then." Brown’s seen the world during tours of "Ain’t Misbehavin’" and "Smokey Joe’s Café" – probably his favorite show – among other productions. "(Touring is) so much fun," he says, listing a flexible schedule, the ability to visit friends, and audience reaction as perks of the job. Now back in Augusta – at least for a while – Brown is channeling his creative energies into different veins. He’s been working with Creative Impressions, a group of high school students. "(I’m) trying to share some of the knowledge that I have about the business and about performance," he says. Brown is also slated to wow Augusta audiences in two upcoming productions: "HMS Pinafore" with the Augusta Opera, in which he plays the villain, Dick Deadeye; and "From Mozart to Motown: An Evening With Russell Brown" Nov. 1. It’s the first time Brown has done an entire show himself, and he’s excited. "It’s my ideas: I’ve chosen the songs; I’ve chosen the costumes; I’ve done the choreography," he says. He even promises that one of the production numbers will be "a real show-stopper." And, Halloween night, Brown is coordinating an invited dress rehearsal for Augusta Housing Authority and Harrisburg families, complete with a party, a costume contest and – of course – trick-or-treat bags. But after the lights go down on Brown’s show, don’t expect him to hop on the next flight to New York. "I love New York – it’s my second home – but I think because I’m older and because I’ve had the chance to experience Augusta on my own terms as an adult, I’m not so eager to get back there."

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13 M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

14 M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

MetroBeat Coliseum Authority Embarrassed by Conference's Failings

“

Something is not right when the bishop’s wife is serving tea and fixing salad.

”

- Authority member Bill Maddox

xactly one month ago this week, Civic Center General Manager Reggie Williams was fired by the Augusta-Richmond County Coliseum Authority. The reason several of the authority members gave for Williams’ termination was what they called a total failure on his part to ensure that the recent North Georgia Annual Conference of United Methodists, with its 3,500 attendees, was a complete success. In fact, the four-day conference, which is estimated to have a $2.5 million economic impact on Augusta, was described by the authority as a “complete flop.” Williams lost his job over the conference’s fiasco. On July 23, it was Jill Pokrzywinski’s turn to face the coliseum authority’s anger over the event. Pokrzywinski is the general manager of the Augusta division of Fine Host Corporation, the civic center’s private catering company. Since the United Methodist Conference, which was held on June 11-14, the authority has heard numerous complaints from the group regarding the catering and concessions of the event. For example, authority members were told that the event was sorely understaffed, the food was frequently late, those serving the meals constantly ran out of the basics such as water and hot coffee and there were even times when Fine Host did not have enough food to go around. Authority member Quincy Murphy said it is the civic center’s job to serve the public and something clearly went wrong during the United Methodist Conference. Murphy asked Pokrzywinski, who was out of town attending a business convention during the week of the church’s conference, to explain to the authority what happened. Pokrzywinski stepped forward and said that she did not want to make any excuses for the problems Fine Host experienced during the United Methodist Conference. “I hired a catering sales manager who was supposed to take care of things until I got back,” Pokrzywinski said. “She failed our company; she failed the civic center; she failed the Methodist conference, singlehandedly, by not being prepared.” As a result, Pokrzywinski said that particular employee has been fired. “We’ve never had a situation like that occur in the past, and we don’t foresee that it will happen in the future,” Pokrzywinski said. “Service was our big issue. When you don’t have ample staff, it is hard to provide the proper service.” According to information provided to authority members by the church, there

BY STACEY EIDSON

were times when salt for the lunch tables was brought out in pans, dinner rolls were simply tossed on a cloth-covered table without a container or basket, salad dressing was placed on the tables but salad was never served and at least once there was only one buffet line to accommodate 400 people. “My concern is to provide better service because that’s what we are here for,” Murphy told Pokrzywinski. While Pokrzywinski said she understood that there was a list of complaints that members of the United Methodist Conference gave the authority, she insisted that the actual people that Fine Host had signed contracts with to cater the event never complained about the civic center’s service or food. Authority member Bill Maddox told Pokrzywinski that it didn’t matter who was actually making the complaints. He said there shouldn’t have been any complaints at all. “Something is not right when the bishop’s wife is serving tea and fixing salad,” Maddox said. “The overall thing is, it was a disaster. I don’t know who to blame. ... You went out of town. You should have stayed when you knew we were going to have 3,500 people here for a major conference that has an economic impact of $2.5 million to this city.” Pokrzywinski again attempted to apologize to the authority. “When I left, I left knowing that my management staff, which I employed, had that event handled. And unfortunately, they did not,” Pokrzywinski said. “Absolutely there were complaints. Absolutely it was uncalled for. And it will absolutely not happen again. “We dropped the ball. And I sincerely apologize for it.” Pokrzywinski said the only way she can offer to help fix the situation is to return a portion of the church’s money that it paid for the event. However, Pokrzywinski said that she has been instructed to wait to make an offer to the United Methodist officials until the authority selects a committee to advise her in the matter. Authority member Fred Reed told the board that it may be too late to mend any fences with the United Methodist officials. “I’ve heard that they are not coming back,” Reed said. But authority member Billy Holden said it shouldn’t matter what the United Methodists’ plans are next year. He said the civic center needs to refund at least a portion of the church’s money. “If we’re wrong, we’re wrong,” Holden said. “And whether they come back or never come back, we should make amends.”

Laney-Walker Accusses HND of Losing $395,000

15 M E T R O

BY STACEY EIDSON

t’s that time of the year again, when city officials begin to ask: What’s going on with the Armstrong Galleria project on Laney-Walker Blvd.? Since 1998, the Laney-Walker Development Corporation has been working on the second phase of construction to the Armstrong Galleria, a shopping center in Augusta’s inner city. For years, the problem was that the group had to purchase land surrounding the galleria, demolish any structures existing on the land and relocate the residents living in those homes. Now that Laney-Walker Development Corporation has achieved those goals, Augusta commissioners thought that it wouldn’t be long before construction on the new project began. However, there now seems to be a bit of a cash flow problem. Earlier this month, members of the LaneyWalker Development Corporation went before the Augusta Commission’s administrative services committee suggesting that the city’s Housing and Neighborhood Development (HND) department had misplaced or misspent the corporation’s $395,000 Community Development Block Grant (CDBG) that it received in 2001. But city officials counter that claim, stating that the $395,000 is not missing. Instead, they say Laney-Walker Development Corporation has already spent approximately $142,000 of the 2001 grant. In fact, according to city records, LaneyWalker Development Corporation has only $252,700 remaining of the total $815,000 provided through three grants from the housing department to the Armstrong Galleria project since 1998. On July 8, Norman Michael, development manager for the city’s housing department, informed the commission that a portion of the $395,000 had been used to pay for some of the demolition costs associated with the project. Rev. Hardy Bennings Jr., chairman of the Laney-Walker Development Corporation, interrupted Michael, telling the commission that the group stood to challenge the information provided by the housing department. Bennings explained that the corporation’s expenses for the project’s land acquisition, demolition of property and relocation of residents should have been paid for out of two grants the Laney-Walker Development Corporation had received prior to the $395,000 grant in 2001. In 1998, the Augusta Commission had given Laney-Walker Development Corporation $250,000. In 2000, the city’s housing department provided the CSRA Business League,

which partnered with the Laney-Walker Development Corporation, $170,000 from CDBG monies. The total of those two grants was $420,000, Bennings said. “Our contention is that there was no reason to bother the $395,000 grant with the allocation of $420,000 from the first two grants,” Bennings told the commission. “But, as we speak today, we’ve been told by the city that we only have a balance of $208,449 left for the project.” To verify Bennings’ claim, Cathy Maness, formerly of the CSRA Business League, presented the commission with a spreadsheet that stated the Laney-Walker Development Corporation had only spent a total of $365,314 on the project and $38,249 on administrative expenses. Therefore, of the first two grants equaling $420,000, Maness said there still should be an ending balance of $16,436. Bennings insisted that the 2001 grant of $395,000 should still be intact. “The bottom line is, we want our $395,000,” Bennings said. “We have banks waiting. We have contractors waiting. Our credibility is going to (be) shot because of whatever is going on with money that was allocated. “Our question is: Where is our money?” Michael insisted that all the money taken out of the $395,000 grant had been used on the Armstrong Galleria project. But, despite what the city employees were saying, several commissioners immediately sided with the Laney-Walker Development Corporation and accused the housing department of losing almost $400,000. “We have created a negative, hostile atmosphere simply because we’ve done pee-poor accounting,” said Commissioner Willie Mays. “Someone over there doesn’t know how to add.” Mays acknowledged that the housing department is currently without a director, but he said that was no excuse for failing to provide the city with accurate accounting. “You’ve got folks working over there that don’t know how to find six figures of money, but if I can find six votes I’m going to help some folks to decide how to get some things done around here,” Mays said, referring to the six votes needed to terminate employees. “Because I think a change is needed, in terms of some of the faces that are constantly making decisions over there.” As soon as Mays was finished, other commissioners began apologizing to the LaneyWalker Development Corporation. Mayor Bob Young said that the city’s housing department is a political nightmare.

“You’ve got folks working over there that don’t know how to find six figures of money, but if I can find six votes I’m going to help some folks to decide how to get some things done around here.” - Augusta Commissioner Willie Mays

“We have created one of the finest bureaucracies in this country over at HND,” Young said. Commissioner Lee Beard ended the meeting reiterating Mays’ threat that city housing employees may be fired if they don’t fix the situation. “We will bring this back to the next committee and if what you want is not there, let’s have the attorney call an executive meeting and let’s deal with personnel,” Beard said. Adding more fuel to the fire, Kip Plowman, from the accounting firm of Cherry, Bekaert & Holland, told the commission during its annual audit report, that the financial records in the city’s housing department were a mess. “We went over there a number of times and things weren’t ready,” Plowman said. “We just didn’t feel like the records were adequately maintained.” After that announcement, it seemed commissioners had no doubt in their minds that the city’s housing department was wrong when it came to the Armstrong Galleria account. However, it appears the commissioners were the ones who were wrong. On July 22, Anthony Chandler, executive director of Laney-Walker Development Corporation, said that he and the city were now in agreement with the project’s financial numbers. “We’ve come up with a conclusion of where the monies went,” Chandler said. “We have reconciled the numbers to show where the deficit amount is. Right now, we are working with the administrator’s office looking to see how those monies can be reappropriated to bring it back up to the original amount of $395,000.” When asked what the project’s current deficit of the public funds was, Chandler did not want to say. “That’s something you’ll have to get from the city,” Chandler said. “I do have those numbers, but I’ll let the city give the explanation of that.” According to Deputy Administrator Fred Russell, a total of $142,278 was spent on the Armstrong Galleria project out of the $395,000 grant. “The issue was, where did the money go? Well, we’ve now agreed to where it went and it was all spent on the Armstrong Galleria,” Russell said. “So, therefore, the balance that’s left is $252,721.” Russell explained that was the remaining balance from all three of the Laney-Walker Development Corporation’s grants, which totaled $815,000. “There is no missing money anywhere,” Russell said. “We’ve come to an agreement that it was all spent to get the Armstrong Galleria where it is today.”

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S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

S K Y REALLY FA L L I N G ?

M E T R O

IS THE

S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

BY B R IAN N E I L L

his September, a group of scientists, military experts and astronomers will gather at a Hyatt in Arlington, Va., to discuss possible options for blowing up or otherwise diverting a giant celestial body like an asteroid, should it happen to be heading our way. And no, this is not a treatment for a science fiction movie project. The premise of the three-day conference, titled “Workshop on Scientific Requirements for Mitigation of Hazardous Comets and Asteroids,” is that Earth has a 10-percent chance of being struck within the next 100 years by a sizeable enough asteroid to cause large-scale destruction. In other words, imagine us as the guy in the caged golf cart at the driving range. But take away the cage and make the golf balls 300 feet — or roughly the length of five 18wheelers parked front to end — in diameter. That’s roughly the size space rock that experts say could trigger a tidal wave or lay waste to a city. At the same time, scientists believe that the timeframe for a potential asteroid collision with Earth nearly coincides with that for developing technology to mitigate such a threat. And the clock is already ticking. Just this week, the Associated Press reported initial calculations by astronomers that a 1.2-mile-wide asteroid could collide with Earth on Feb. 1, 2019. Although NASA scientists said the risk of

impact was low, experts said the asteroid strike could release as much energy as a large nuclear weapon. In the early part of June, newspapers and television stations around the world reported our planet’s relatively close brush with a large asteroid. Granted, “relatively” would be the key word here, as the asteroid, dubbed 2002 MN, was still some 80,000 miles from Earth. By comparison, the exosphere, the final layer of Earth’s protective atmosphere, dissipates into space at about 450 miles above the planet. The moon is about 230,000 miles from Earth. However, even if 2002 MN wasn’t as close as some news accounts might have led one to believe, there was one chilling aspect of the discovery: Scientists and astronomers didn’t see the asteroid until it had already passed by us. “See that’s the scary thing; we didn’t know about it until after it flew by,” said Lucy McFadden, an astronomy research professor at the University of Maryland, who’ll be attending the September conference. “But we couldn’t have, because it was in the glare of the sun before it got to us. So that’s why it’s important to survey and know what’s out there.” The asteroid was estimated to be between 50 and 100 yards across, which most experts agree is large enough to destroy the average-sized city upon impact. There have been other recent encounters

with near-Earth objects, or NEOs, as well. In March, another asteroid, now named 2002 EM7, made a relatively close pass to Earth, albeit farther away than the June encounter. This asteroid was believed to have been roughly 200 feet across and passed within about 298,000 miles of Earth. In 1989, according to NASA, an asteroid labeled 1989 FC, with a diameter of 0.3 miles and the kinetic energy of more than 1,000, one-megaton, hydrogen bombs, passed within about 430,000 miles of Earth. Like the June encounter, neither of these were discovered until they had passed Earth. McFadden, who is also under contract with NASA to work on the Deep Impact project, a $270 million orbiter mission scheduled to launch in 2004 that will physically collect core samples from a comet, thinks the recent discoveries of asteroids in our own back yard will heighten awareness by government officials and the public of the potential threat that does exist. “But on the other hand, we can’t lose sleep over it,” McFadden adds. “We want to just keep our eyes open.”

E Y E I N G S PA C E

David Morrison deserves as much credit as anyone for bringing to the forefront of discussion the potential for an asteroid impact with Earth. A NASA scientist, Morrison authored the first congressionally mandated study on asteroid impact threats in 1992.

Through that report, NASA and astronomers around the globe embarked on the Spaceguard Survey program, which has as its goal the detection of 90 percent of NEOs larger than 1 kilometer (0.6 miles) in diameter by 2008. Already, more than half of the asteroids that size have been detected and the project is on track for completion by the deadline, Morrison said by telephone from the NASA Ames Research Center at Moffett Field in California. “That part’s coming along very well,” Morrison said. “Now, if you want to talk about going smaller than 1 kilometer, we’re not doing very well there at all. But first things first; get the big ones first.” Morrison estimates there are as many as 1 million NEOs in space larger than 50 meters in diameter, the minimum size able to enter Earth’s atmosphere without breaking up. “Virtually all of those could eventually hit the Earth,” Morrison said. “They won’t, all. Some of them will make close passes by planets and be ejected, some will end up hitting the sun, some will hit Mars, some will hit Venus. But that’s when you look at it with a time scale of tens of millions of years. But right now, that number includes most anything that could hit the Earth.” But it’s not like asteroids and other chunks of natural space debris have never hit the Earth before. In 1908, a meteorite struck Tunguska in Siberia, killing animals and destroying miles of forest with its shock wave.

“So really, the warning divides into two extremes: If you found it (the asteroid), and calculated its orbit, you’re likely to have centuries of warning. If you haven’t found it, yes, you’d be completely taken by surprise. The first you’d know it is when you saw the sky light up and then felt the ground shake.” — David Morrison, a NASA scientist studying and documenting asteroids with potential for colliding with Earth.

17 M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

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start in childhood, as early as 6 months old, to prevent skin cancer later in life. Parents should take proper steps to protect their children, and themselves. • Avoid exposure to the sun between the hours of 10 a.m. and 4 p.m.

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• Infants less than 6 months should avoid all sun exposure. • Apply suncreen to all children, 6 months and older, 15-30 minutes before they go into the sun. • Cover all exposed areas including lips, ears, neck and feet. • Use a PABA-free sunscreen with at least a 15 SPF with UVA and UVB protection. • Reapply sunscreen every 2 hours. • Use sunscreen even on cloudy days. • Make sure your child has UV blocking sunglasses. • Encourage your child to wear a hat with a 4" brim. More kids are admitted to emergency rooms between May and August than at any other time of the year. MCG Children’s Medical Center has the area’s only specialized pediatric emergency department dedicated to the care of children and teens. Our team of medical professionals understands the unique needs of children and their families. And because we are an academic medical center, we deliver the most advanced treatments and technology in pediatric care today. For the best care for your child, come to the region’s only specialized children’s hospital – MCG Children’s Medical Center.

Tomorrow’s Medicine, Here Today.

18 Some scientists suggest that the air blast, M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

alone, from the impact could have generated hurricane-force winds as far as 24 miles away. Winslow, Ariz., draws thousands of visitors each year to see the Barringer Crater, a mile-wide, 570-feet-deep hole (pictured below) left in the aftermath of a meteorite impact that scientists believe occurred between 1,000 and 50,000 years ago. NASA believes the crater was created by a meteorite that was only 150 feet across, weighing 300,000 tons and traveling at 40,000 miles per hour. And then, of course, there’s the mother of all earth-crashing space rocks that many scientists believe wiped out the dinosaurs. That mammoth comet or asteroid left a 120mile-wide crater near the Yucatan Peninsula that gradually filled with ocean sediment over the 65 million years since it struck. Asteroids, which are generally composed of rock and metals like nickel and iron, have been passing by Earth since the beginning of time as they shake out of the Asteroid Belt between Jupiter and Mars. Every year, NASA estimates, several hundred meteorites, or broken-up asteroids, strike the land or sea without incident. That’s why the recent news regarding 2002 MN’s close passage didn’t do much to rattle Morrison. “That doesn’t bother me at all. We did see it,” Morrison said. “The fact is, asteroids that big come that close every year. And until recently we never saw any of them. And now, we’re starting to find them and that’s a sign that the survey system is working. We really are picking these things up.” And history, itself, should offer people some comfort, Morrison added. “We know that an asteroid coming in, even a relatively small one, could wipe out a city,” Morrison said. “Now, think about all

of human history. Has any city ever been wiped out by an asteroid? No. Have any cities ever been wiped out by other means? Lots of them. Wars, earthquakes, volcanoes, fires, atom bombs, you name it. “It’s not a very severe risk compared to a whole lot of other things. But once you get above the threshold for a global catastrophe, the risk does become greater because we’re all affected, wherever it hits.” Morrison points out that such a risk could come from asteroids smaller than 1 kilometer in diameter, the size category of which he earlier mentioned we had not done the best job detecting. “Even down as little as a couple of hundred meters (wide) would be bad news if it hit in the ocean,” Morrison said. “It

would produce a tsunami, and if it hit in the middle of the Atlantic it would produce a significant tsunami on both sides, both Europe and the U.S.”

W H AT W O U L D W E D O ?

We can thank Hollywood for already providing us with some possible asteroid scenarios. A chuckle comes from Morrison when asked about recent movie accounts of menacing asteroids and comets like “Armageddon” and “Deep Impact.” “I make it a point of not becoming a movie critic,” Morrison said. “The fact is, there were some good things and some bad things, but at least it did raise everyone’s awareness.”

But some misconceptions have also come with that awareness. For instance, Morrison said, the idea of a Texas-sized asteroid such as the one in “Armageddon” is “absurd.” “There are no such asteroids, by a huge margin,” Morrison said. “We’ve found every asteroid that comes near the Earth that’s larger than about 3 kilometers in diameter. So none of those is going to hit.” As for the 1-kilometer-diameter size, of which only half have been discovered, some of those asteroids could take hundreds of years circling Earth before succumbing to its gravitational pull. “So really,” Morrison said, “the warning divides into two extremes: If you found it, and calculated its orbit, you’re likely to

“After we’ve fully figured out how the target object (an asteroid or comet) is structured, it may be the target of a ‘kinetic impact’ to see if we know how to precisely move it ... Following these experiments, and only if we found an asteroid on a direct collision (course) with Earth, would we begin planning divert operations. If the asteroid is small, these divert operations would almost certainly not involve any nuclear devices.” — USAF Brig. Gen. Pete Worden, vice director of operations with the United States Space Command.

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have centuries of warning. If you haven’t found it, yes, you’d be completely taken by surprise. “The first you’d know it is when you saw the sky light up and then felt the ground shake.” But in the event we did detect an asteroid or comet on a head-on course with our planet, could we do anything about it? Surprisingly, perhaps, Morrison said some of the scenarios in movies like “Armageddon” aren’t so far-fetched in terms of their technological solutions. If we put men on the moon, we could certainly put them on an asteroid, Morrison believes. “We clearly have the capability to send spacecraft out to comets and asteroids and we do it,” Morrison said. But any type of mission to attempt to explode an asteroid or other celestial body hurtling toward Earth would likely be conducted remotely, Morrison said. However, the foremost objective, most experts agree, is determining the true compositions of asteroids and comets. On July 3, NASA’s project Contour (Comet Nucleus Tour) was launched from Cape Canaveral in Florida. During the four-year mission, the $159 million spacecraft will explore comets and asteroids, photographing them and examining the makeup of their cores and surrounding gases. McFadden, the University of Maryland research professor working on the upcoming Deep Impact launch in 2004, said missions like hers are more important at the moment than deciding how to shoot down comets and asteroids, because there’s still so much experts don’t know about the intended targets. “We’re trying hard not to spend a lot of time on what nuclear weapons we detonate or what the nuclear weapons do to the comets, because we don’t know what the structure of the inside of the comet is,” McFadden said. “So we really don’t have enough information to determine what a nuclear weapon or some laser — which might destroy or disperse a comet — we don’t know what it would do to them, because we don’t know what the comets and asteroids are made of, well enough.” Still, McFadden said she knows some attending the September workshop will be discussing strategic, military options. One of those will be U.S. Air Force Brig. Gen. Pete Worden, vice director of operations with the United States Space Command. A former research astronomer, Worden has written and lectured extensively on the

Department of Defense’s potential role in mitigating the threat of Earth-crashing asteroids and comets. Worden predicts that in the next decade or so, the military may embark on experiments to divert an asteroid by using a missile or impacting projectile to strike it. “After we’ve fully figured out how the target object is structured, it may be the target of a ‘kinetic impact’ to see if we know how to precisely move it,” Worden said, responding to questions via e-mail. Worden said any such test would involve a small object, which would hold no chance of colliding with Earth, should something go wrong with the test. “Following these experiments, and only if we found an asteroid on a direct collision (course) with Earth, would we begin planning divert operations,” Worden said. “If the asteroid is small, these divert operations would almost certainly not involve any nuclear devices.” Worden said many existing satellites used for Department of Defense purposes could also begin serving a dual role of tracking asteroids. That could become even more likely owing to recent events in which meteorites impacting on the Earth’s upper atmosphere had the potential for being mistaken by military watchers for nuclear explosions, Worden said. Even with all this “sky-is-falling” rhetoric, however, Morrison thinks our chances of being hit by a large asteroid without us detecting it are fairly remote, particularly given the cataloging efforts underway with the Spaceguard Survey. In his initial report to Congress in 1992, Morrison put the chances of a human dying from an asteroid strike at roughly 1 in 20,000, just above dying in a flood, which carries odds of 1 in 30,000 chances. The No. 1 incident in terms of chances of dying was a motor vehicle accident — 1 in 100. But even those statistics miss the big picture, Morrison said. “Let me give you the analogy I usually use: If you’re going to cross a busy highway or a busy intersection in town on foot, you really don’t care what the statistics are as to how often a pedestrian is run down,” Morrison said. “You look and see if a car is headed for you. Same way here. The statistics, they are uncertain by factors of two or three. I don’t care. “The issue is not whether there is a one in a million chance or a one in 2 million chance that we’ll be hit (by an asteroid) this year. The question is, are we, or are we not?”

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Arts

& Entertainment

Atlantis and Ozzfest Just Around the Corner

BY RHONDA JONES

ummertime might as well be called music fest time, and here we are right in the middle of it. So far, we’ve enjoyed Locobazooka sponsored by the guys over at 95 Rock, AthFest in Athens and On the Bricks in Atlanta, which is a festival of sorts, spread out over the entire summer. But the fun’s not over yet, kiddies. We haven’t even done Atlantis. The Atlantis Music Conference will be held this year July 31-Aug. 3 at the Sheraton in downtown Atlanta. The conference promises a couple hundred – 200, as a matter of fact – bands showing what they can do in the Little Five Points, Virginia Highlands, Downtown, and Midtown areas of Atlanta. You can view the complete menu at www.atlantismusic.com, but here is a sumptuous sample platter to get you started. The Yard: They’ve been to Augusta before. They’re yummy and put on a high-energy show. Check them out at theyard.info. Jennifer Nettles: She has also been to Augusta and put on a great show. Go see her if you haven’t. Or you could sit around here and wait till she comes back. Aerial: Four guys who do the trip-hop thing, with soul, jazz and break-beat as well. You can check out samples of what they do-do-do at music.aerial2012.com, and order a copy if you’re so inclined. Other bands include Atlanta favorites Beanpole, Michelle Malone, Six Against Seven, The Veins... Just go to atlantismusic.com. See for yourself. In addition to all that, there will be educational panels and lectures by the folks in the industry who know what they’re talking about for those hopeful musicians who want to kick their day jobs to the curb. Atlantis tickets are $25 for three days. Times are Aug. 1 from 8 p.m. to 2 a.m., Aug. 2 from 8 p.m. until 2 a.m. and

Aug. 3 from 8 p.m. until 1 a.m. Visit www.atlantismusic.com for more info. Ozzfest is a touring festival of sound, and it will hit Atlanta on July 28, square in the Hi-Fi Buys Amphitheater. The soundwave will create tsunami on the other side of the world. The bill includes Mushroomhead, a heavy yet literary band who were here for Locobazooka, Seether, The Apex Theory, Drowning Pool, Rob Zombie, Zakk Wylde’s Black Label Society, Hatebreed, System of a Down. And of course, the man himself, Ozzy. His kid, Kelly, the Princess of Darkness herself, is on the Ozzfest 2002 live album, singing her heart out with Andrew W.K. The album is due out on Aug. 27 on Columbia Records. Ozzfest is an international tour by the way, in that it also goes to the UK. But this side of the pond, it started July 10 in Scranton, Penn., and moved on through New Jersey,

Connecticut, Massachusetts, and then came South. To North Carolina. According to the posted schedule, it runs until Sept. 8, when they play in Dallas, Texas. More info can be had at www.ozzfest.com. You can grab tickets at www.ozzfest-tickets.net/ and they will be delivered overnight by Federal Express unless stated otherwise. Or you can order by phone at (888)-TIXX-ONE. But that’s not all. The Harvest Moon Blues Fest happens Labor Day weekend, Aug. 30 - Sept. 1. at the Georgia International Horse Park. Featured acts are Delta Moon, Michael Burks, and Chubby Carrier and the Bayou Swamp Band, Motor City Josh and the Big Three, Sweet Betty and the Breeze Kings and others. Tix run from $5 to $20, depending on which day you attend. For more info visit www.harvestmoonblues.com. Happy summer listening.

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Arts: Music

Augusta Artist and Musician Seeks His Fortune in Nashville

By Lisa Jordan

come into town every couple of months ocal artist and musician David and work on stuff. Swanagin is something of a "The Frame Shoppe sells a lot of my Renaissance man. work and they’ll keep stuff. He’ll keep a His painting career is flourishhandful of paintings constantly. And ing; he’s about to try his hand at studio there’s a place called Trends and musicianship; he’s getting married in Traditions, which is an antique store, less than a month – and he’s in the and they’ve got about 10 of my pieces." process of moving to Nashville. Swanagin’s been painting for a while. Swanagin sits down in a rare moment It’s in his blood; his mother was a of rest to tell The Spirit just what he’s painter, as well. got planned next. "But you know, I stopped painting for "I played in Nashville," he says, "and always loved that town. Everybody’s so a long time when the music started taking off," says Swanagin. "About five, friendly. There’s just a lot of stuff six years ago, seven years ago, I was going on." playing three or four nights a week. So Swanagin kept the city in mind That’s what allowed me to get my art when searching for the perfect place to going, because I’d come back and I’d hone his artistic and musical skills. He have three days off with nothing but and fiancée Traci Wasden, who time to paint. Both of them were kind of Swanagin says encouraged him to make feeding off of the move, had each other." been looking for Swanagin’s houses in played in local Augusta. “About five, six years ago, bands "I mentioned to Horsepower and her about seven years ago, I was Snapdragon, but Nashville. And when he and a I’m not going to playing three or four friend recorded Nashville really nights a week. That’s at Reba for my art – for McEntire’s drums, for my what allowed me to get Nashville studio drumming," – a big, beautiSwanagin says. my art going, because I’d ful facility, "I’ve always liked come back and I’d have according to that city and Swanagin – always thought three days off with noththat’s when the I’d love to go up and just try someing but time to paint. Both studio musician bug bit him. thing new. of them were kind of feed"I want to go "So we went up and just try and looked ing off of each other.” to have a good around, and she -David Swanagin time with it and was supportive try not to expect enough to say, too much," says ‘Let’s go up and Swanagin. "But hang out for a I know I’ll learn a lot from it. Even if while.’" nothing great happens with the drum Though the main reason for the move is Swanagin’s desire to work as a studio part of it, I’ll have expanded my art market. I don’t really think I can lose." musician and perhaps find some touring When Swanagin gets to Nashville, he work, he’s not planning on abandoning plans to paint some of the city’s landhis art – or his Augusta customers. marks, a tradition he’s taking with him Swanagin, who calls himself a "pretty traditional landscape oil painter," stress- from Augusta. "(The Nashville art galleries said) es that he’s not giving up painting. there’s not a lot of traditional painters "I’m not going to quit painting – I (here), and I said, ‘You’ve got to be kidactually picked up seven commissions ding me,’" Swanagin recalls. "They said two weeks ago," he says. "I just really (they) couldn’t get any of the local artists want to expand." Swanagin already has gallery represen- to paint any of the historic sites, beautiful parks and great architecture. I said, ‘OK, tation in downtown Nashville and says I’ll come up and give it a try.’" the art galleries he’s visited are optiIn between painting, drumming and mistic that his work will do as well unpacking, Swanagin probably won’t have there as it has in Augusta. "It’s a very time to be homesick. But on the edge of warm welcome," he says. And, so his customers here can contin- his departure, he acknowledges the impact leaving Augusta will have on him. ue to collect his paintings, Swanagin "It’s tough when you’ve been someplans to keep Augusta stocked. where like here for a long time," "I don’t want (my customers) to think Swanagin says. "You’ve got family and I’m turning my back on them," he says. "My family and things are here, and I’ve friends and a lot of roots here. "A lot of nice people I meet, doing had a lot of great supporters of my art. what I do." "I still work on commissions, I’ll still

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Arts: Theater

Four Plays, Four Bucks

nly the four mysterious boxes arranged on the deserted stage hinted at the performance to come in a week’s time. Four black boxes, alive with pairs of faces – drama masks in white and red, skulls, and orange, triangular heads. On July 25-27, the stage will be peopled with actors, presenting four one-act plays. There will be no additional props, because the ASU Summer Stock directors want to keep it simple for their debut in the director’s chair. That’s right – debut. These directors are brand new. Brian Kirkey is directing “Dora,” a play about love and friendship, by ASU student Michael D. Lindsey. “It’s a very simple oneact,” he said. “That’s why I chose it.” The play is a conversation between two good friends Ed and Pete after Pete’s bachelor party. During the course of the conversation, the groom learns his friend’s true feelings. (It’s all I can do not to give you the spoiler. But somehow I manage to hold back.) Explaining the rationale behind his and his colleagues’ choices, Kirkey said, “We knew that if we tried to take on too much, that it might degrade the overall performance.”

By Rhonda Jones

The new directors expressed their desire that they deliver a quality performance, even if it is their first time. Benji Drown is the director who took on two plays, “Edible Complex” and “A Little Death.” The reason for this, he said, is that once upon a time there was a fourth director, who dropped out of the project. Drown took on an extra play so that the actors’ hard work would not have been in vain. The plays are both by a playwright named James Corey Kaufman who publishes his work online and allows theater groups to perform his plays without paying royalties. Kaufman is fond of little twists at the end of his scripts, Drown said. In “Edible Complex,” Drown added, a man and his wife are talking over dinner, and they begin to discuss a jogger who was killed in the park the year before. “A Little Death” employs the same construction – two characters talking. But things are not what they seem in Kaufman’s work, and the viewer who doesn’t want to wait for the twist at the end to find out what the conversations are really about, will have to listen very closely. The Kaufman play the directors didn’t

choose, “Flame,” features a guy who has brought home a girl for some fun ‘n’ games – and whose girlfriend walks in. When he leaves, the tables are turned as he finds his girlfriend and his new friend becoming cozy. These three plays will entertain you the first hour. The last half is all “Competition Piece.” Julie Jones directed “Competition Piece,” which is an appropriate ending to the evening. It is about three high schools who are involved in a drama competition. This play is the reason behind the paintings on the boxes, which represent the Metalheads (green skulls), the Arties (orange triangles), and the Preps (regular ol’ run-of-the-mill drama masks). It’s a play – or rather three – within a play, Jones says, featuring three front-row judges surrounding the stage, with two of them giving running commentary on the shows, and Death not saying a word. Jones gives a couple reasons for choosing “Competition Piece.” For one thing, she says, it’s just a fun play. “This was my first play I was ever in,” she said. The boxes are even the very props used in that production as well. Not only is “Competition Piece” the longest

For a

Student Director Julie Jones of the four plays being shown that evening, but it is also the most involved. “Anyone who’s in the other plays is in mine,” Jones says. Don’t forget: The plays run July 25-27 at 8 p.m. at the Grover C. Maxwell Performing Arts Theater on the campus of Augusta State University. Admission is $4. For info, call Julie Jones at 564-6456.

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Cinema Movie Listings “Austin Powers in Goldmember” Austin Powers in Goldmember (PG-13) —

Randy 1960s spy Austin Powers is still sparring with Dr. Evil and Mini-Me; this time, the duo works with new villain Goldmember to kidnap Austin’s father and transpor t him to the 1970s. Austin follows, sexy Beyonce Knowles in tow as his par tner Fox xy Cleopatra, and vows to contain Dr. Evil once and for all. This is the third and final installment in the Austin Powers series, with plenty of cameos to take it out in style. Cast: Mike Myers, Michael Caine, Beyonce Knowles, Seth Green, Verne Troyer, Rober t Wagner, Michael York. Bad Company (PG-13) — It stars schticky Chris Rock and stolid Anthony Hopkins, who seem barely in the same movie. Rock plays a straight-arrow CIA agent named Kevin, whose cover is running an antiques store in Prague. Kevin gets killed on duty and replaced in a rush by identical twin brother Jake, a jokey speed-chess hustler in New York who never knew he had a twin "separated at bir th." His recruiter is Hopkins as the CIA's Gaylord Oakes. It's another car toon show without animation. This is where James Bond has finally gone for burial. Cast: Anthony Hopkins, Chris Rock, Kerry Washington, Peter Stormare. Running time: 1 hr. 45 mins. (Elliot t) ★ Blade 2 (R) — Wesley Snipes is Blade. He's a buf f leather dude, a half-vampire who hunts vampires with weapons that might give James Bond pause, and with the mar tial moves of a Hong Kong dervish on a spree. There is a vampire aristocracy, their bodies so bleached and pasty you expect them to crumble into talcum powder. And there is a new strain of killer virus monster. Set in a Prague that surpasses Kafka's bad dreams, the movie has a necro-glam ostentation. Kris Kristof ferson is Blade's friend, mentor, old daddy-o. The movie is an enjoyable showof f until it turns pompous, runs too long, and tries to find pathos in the decay of the vampire dynasty, as if this were Greek tragedy instead of pop kitsch. Cast: Wesley Snipes, Kris Kristof ferson, Ron Perlman, Leonor Varela, Norman Reedus. Running time: 1 hr., 52 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ The Bourne Identity (PG-13) — Bourne (Mat t Damon) was sent to kill a risky African leader on a yacht, had an at tack of qualms, then plunged overboard with holes in his back. He was saved by fishermen, the cap-

tain an amateur doctor who pulls the rounds out of Bourne and ex tracts an implant that has the number of a Swiss bank account. In an identity fog, though now with money and passpor ts, and reflexively gif ted with all his trained skills — his sour CIA boss, Conklin (Chris Cooper), decides to snuf f Bourne as "a malfunctioning $30 million piece of equipment" — Bourne zips to Paris af ter emptying the deposit box in Zurich. "The Bourne Identity" has the identity of potent enter tainment. Cast: Mat t Damon, Franka Potente, Chris Cooper, Clive Owen, Brian Cox, Julia Stiles. Running time: 2 hrs. (Elliot t) ★★★1/2 Changing Lanes (R) — A propulsive nerve-biter with genuine human characters, about a yuppie law firm hawk (Ben Af fleck) who upsets the precarious life of a volatile working stif f (Samuel L. Jackson), their mutual moral crisis moving on lines that converge jarringly, despite some plot conveniences. New York is seen smar tly by ace English director Roger ("Persuasion") Michell, with Toni Collet te also outstanding as a lucid mistress. 1 hr., 47 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★1/2 The Country Bears (G) — A blend of live action and Jim Henson-esque puppets, "The Country Bears" tells the story of a young bear, Beary, who is raised by humans and doesn’t realize he is adopted. When he learns the truth, Beary sets out on a journey to the forest to find his family. Cast: Christopher Walken, Deidrich Bader, Daryl Mitchell, Queen Latifah, Haley Joel Osment.

The Crocodile Hunter: Collision Course (PG) — Steve "The Crocodile Hunter" Irwin and wife Terri

dance circles around inept government agents and cuddle flesh-eating crocodiles. When the high-energy hosts of the hit wildlife series "The Crocodile Hunter" are accused of stealing a fallen U.S. spy satellite, they bat tle two silly CIA agents in an Outback adventure. Forget the common sense, but if you toss in the bot tle-sucking joey kangaroo cameo, this lite comedy is a close second to family bonding at the zoo. 1 hr, 27 mins. (Diamond) ★★1/2 Eight Legged Freaks (PG-13) — A clunky, mildly amusing "salute" to big-bug monster movies, as toxically enlarged spiders chase, spear and web dumbbunny humans in Arizona. The only style is TV-filler nostalgia, not the wit tier goofiness of "Tremors," and scenes

“Halloween: Ressurection” RATINGS

★★★★ — Excellent.

like a terrified girl being wrapped in web by a giant arachnid are too ickily intimate for kids (some adults, too). Kari Wuhrer, David Arquet te and Doug E. Doug are screaming bait. Acting dies first. 1 hr. 22 min. (Elliot t) ★1/2 Enough (PG-13) — Not even half enough. This dodo is a female empowerment fantasy, without the honest, gal-with-gun pulpness of "Deep in the Hear t." Jennifer Lopez is the betrayed wife who runs scared with her little girl (frequent witness to sadism), then quickly masters mar tial ar ts to clobber the creep (Billy Campbell, who's like Jim Carrey gone very wrong). Michael Apted directed miserably, wasting his talent and Juliet te Lewis, Fred Ward, and Bill Cobbs. Running time: 1 hr., 55 mins. (Elliot t) ★ Halloween: Resurrection (R) — Jamie Lee Cur tis makes an appearance once again in the eighth film in the "Halloween" series. This time, six teens decide to host a live Internet chat in the house where Michael Myers grew up, stirring up evil. Cast: Jamie Lee Cur tis, Tyra Banks, Brad Loree. High Crimes (PG-13) — Morgan Freeman, wry old acting master, carries much of this taut but implausible thriller, which involves military cover-ups and a chilling trial, though early clues harm the whopper finish. Carl Franklin also got good work from Ashley Judd, Jim Caviezel, Amanda Peet and Adam Scot t. 1 hr., 47 mins. (Elliot t) ★★1/2 Ice Age (PG) — Most of "Ice Age" is about a lippy sloth named Sid, voiced by John Leguizamo. (Is there a less sloth-like actor alive?) Fleeing the advancing polar ice cap, he tries fiercely to bond with a hairy mammoth, Manfred (Ray Romano) and even a saber-toothed tiger, Diego (Denis Leary). Sure enough, Sid, Manfred and Diego rescue a human baby from marauding sabertoothed tigers. That's the story: the three travelers, each way ahead of the evolutionary curve with their jokes, and the papoose-like human with big eyes, and the pursuing big cats, who expect Diego to betray his new companions. There is a clima x, so safely predictable you won't find your temperature budging. "Ice Age" will probably get enough kids smiling to earn its big cost back, and then some. Cast: Ray Romano, John Leguizamo, Denis Leary, Goran Visnjic, Jack Black, Tara Strong. Running time: 1 hr., 24 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Juwanna Mann (PG-13) — Miguel A. Nunez Jr. is Jamal. The vain, preening NBA star is suspended for a burst of irate mooning and then full-frontal exposure on cour t. And then — inspired by a young girl whose love of the game moves him — he becomes Juwanna, a fake female, who fires up a women's pro team. Vivica A. Fox is the team's reigning beauty, on whom Jamal has a cover t crush. The cour t action is all high points, no game. Gender comedy becomes a ruthless reduction of both sexes. Director Jesse Vaughan came from music videos, and should probably return. Hectic, vapid, almost witless, "Juwanna Mann" keeps jammin' across the goofs, then milking inane sentiment before stumbling to a blooper reel that is no dif ferent than the preceding inept movie. Cast: Miguel A. Nunez Jr., Kevin Pollak, Vivica A. Fox, Ginuwine, Tommy Davidson. Running time: 1 hr., 26 mins. (Elliot t) ★ K-19: The Widowmaker (PG-13) — is about the vir tually suicidal mission and hapless plight of a Soviet sub of that name, during a tense time (1961) of the Cold War, based on actual facts. Though said to be the pride of Soviet Russia's new nuclear fleet, K-19 goes to sea inadequately prepared, on a politically motivated mission. It must voyage under polar ice to fire a demo missile, showing the cocky new man in the White House (JFK) how virile Moscow can be. The crew's beloved skipper, Capt. Polenin (Liam Neeson), is demoted to executive

★★★— Worthy.

★★ — Mixed.

★ — Poor.

0— Not worthy.

of ficer under Capt. Vostrikov (Harrison Ford), a fierce patriot. "K-19" puts a clammy whammy on us when a pressure leak in one of the reactors brings on nuclear horror. This is one of the most machocentric and masochistic movies ever made by a woman; Kathryn Bigelow directed. Cast: Harrison Ford, Liam Neeson, Joss Ackland, Peter Sarsgaard. Running time: 2 hrs., 10 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Like Mike (PG) — The rapper Lil’ Bow Wow plays 14-year-old Calvin Cambridge, one of the older residents in an L.A. orphanage. Calvin has two wishes — to find parents who love him and to play in the NBA like his idol, Michael Jordan. Then one day, Calvin's only adult ally, Sister Theresa (Anne Meara), discovers an old pair of sneakers that once belonged to Michael Jordan. Calvin tries them on, and they are a per fect fit. The nex t day, Calvin's dreams begin to materialize. He meets one of his idols, basketball superstar Tracey Reynolds (Morris Chestnut), during a half time contest at a Los Angeles Knights game. Calvin makes a wish to be "like Mike" and suddenly displays moves reminiscent of Jordan. He is quickly signed by the Knights, and both he and new teammate Tracey go on a journey of self-discovery. Cast: Lil’ Bow Wow, Morris Chestnut, Jonathan Lipnicki, Brenda Song, Crispin Glover, Anne Meara and Eugene Levy. Running time: 1 hr., 30 mins. (McCormick) ★★★ Lilo & Stitch (PG) — A cute Disney 'toon made in Florida but set in Hawaii, where darling Lilo turns a space crit ter into a pet. The animation is not computerized and has lovely watercolor ef fects, though the plot, voicework, Elvis tunes and product plugs are generically New Disney, not of Walt caliber. 1 hr., 20 min. (Elliot t) ★★1/2 Men in Black 2 (PG-13) — Will Smith (very post"Ali") and Tommy Lee Jones (looking aged and bored) return as the alien-busting Men in Black, in a movie stuf fed with crit ters and special ef fects, like a vast expansion of a Mad magazine parody. Rosario Dawson is a decal of innocence, Lara Flynn Boyle a creepy space witch, the pug dog gets more lines, the fun is rather oppressive even at 82 minutes. Cast: Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Rosario Dawson, Lara Flynn Boyle. Running time: 1 hr., 22 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Minority Report (PG-13) — "Minority Repor t" is a sci-fi thriller set in one of those futures (2054) most of us hope never to endure. At the front edge is John Ander ton (Tom Cruise), head of Pre-Crime. He works in a tech hive called the Temple, where three clairvoyants float in a tank like nearly comatose dolphins, feeding their pre-visions of impending murders to a big computer screen. Ander ton assembles the clues, then leads the police team to arrest the presumptively guilty. Once Ander ton is himself accused of being a future killer, he abducts one of the "pre-cog" floaters (Samantha Mor ton). "Minority Repor t" has a kind of ugly beauty and, in its central storm of murk and rush, the suction of a compelling nightmare. Cast: Tom Cruise, Samantha Mor ton, Lois Smith, Peter Stormare, Ma x Von Sydow, Tim Blake Nelson. Running time: 2 hrs., 15 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Mr. Deeds (PG-13) — is an update or takeof f on the 1936 Frank Capra hit "Mr. Deeds Goes to Town." In that, Gary Cooper was a gentle, gallant rube who inherits a for tune, confounds the city slickers and radiates fuzzy ideals, while Depression audiences again got to ogle the idle (but frisky) rich. Now Adam Sandler is Longfellow Deeds, who inherits $40 billion from a genial old flake (Harve Presnell). Peter Gallagher is a fairly standard corporate wheeler as the sharpie running the vast estate. But as star repor ter Babe, Winona Ryder is game and slyly charming. The real ace is John Tur turro as Deed's new manservant, Emilio. It's a fond update and funny comedy, even making good use of John McEnroe (still cocky)

and the Rev. Al Sharpton (dit to). Cast: Adam Sandler, John Tur turro, Winona Ryder, Peter Gallagher, Jared Harris, Erick Avari, Harve Presnell. Running time: 1 hr., 31 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ Pokemon 3 (G) — In this animated feature, young Pokemon trainer Ash Ketchum and his loyal friends journey to the beautiful mountain town of Greenfield, where they will encounter the Unown, the most mysterious of all Pokemon. It is the Unown that create a challenge for Ash far greater than any Pokemon bat tle he has ever experienced before. With help from Pikachu and all his faithful Pokemon, plus friends Brock and Misty and even a lit tle unexpected assistance from Team Rocket, Ash must rescue the young orphan Molly from the mystical forces that threaten to transform her life into a dreamworld prison. At the same time, Ash must also struggle to bring his own mother back from the realm of the Unown before she is lost forever and he becomes an orphan himself. Reign of Fire (PG-13) — In a post-apocalyptic England, a group of fire-breathing dragons has awakened af ter centuries of hibernation. An American militia leader, played by Mat thew McConaughey, and London’s fire chief (Christian Bale) must team up to save London and slay the queen dragon. Plenty of special effects. Cast: Christian Bale, Mat thew McConaughey, Gerard Butler. Road to El Dorado (PG) — Star ting down this road are Tulio and Miguel, a pair of con ar tists playing around 16th century Spain. They win a map to El Dorado, the lost City of Gold, in a craps game and stow away on a Cuba-bound ship to find the for tune. Thrown of f course, the two come across a Mayan city; its residents mistake the two for gods and lead them into El Dorado, where they must decide to stay and live the good live or return to civilization as wealthy men. Cast: Kenneth Branagh, Kevin Kline, Rosie Perez, Edward James Olmos. Running time: 1 hr., 29 mins. Road to Perdition (R) — Tom Hanks plays Michael Sullivan, an Irish-American hoodlum and family man in grim 1931, in the Quad Cities on the Illinois-Iowa border. He's an enforcer and ar t ful killer, almost an adoptive son of bootleg mob boss John Rooney (Paul Newman), a patriarch stricken by inner rot. Sullivan feels rot ted, too, but is an iron survivor. The movie has a solemn, dirgelike (but not dull) conviction of fated purpose. Tragedy must come, violently. It would be criminal here to spell out the exact cost to Sullivan, which spins him free of the Rooney gang, along with his now aware and endangered son Mike Jr. (Tyler Hoechlin). On the long roads and humble towns, they enact an almost archaic Greek vengeance upon the Rooneys. There is father-son bonding (and humor), yet we never forget that every thing is at stake. This story is so mor tal. Cast: Paul Newman, Tom Hanks, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Ciaran Hinds, Liam Aiken, Stanley Tucci, Jude Law. Running time: 2 hrs. (Elliot t) ★★★★ Scooby Doo (PG) — is derived from the longestrunning TV car toon show (beginning in 1969 on CBS), and is mostly set in an island theme park. The 'toon gang loved by their TV fans — ginchy-dish Daphne, plain but brainy Velma, blond ego-dude Fred (author of "Fred on Fred"), grinning par ty dude Shaggy — are now played by actors locked into one-note roles. Great Dane hero Scooby appears computer generated. They go to Spooky Island to solve a criminal conspiracy, where special ef fects and cute theme park crit ters whiz by and the top villain is revealed to be ... a puppy. This is one lollipop of a movie, OK for the 4- to 9-year-olds who like the TV show. 1 hr., 23 mins. ★★ Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron (G) — A sweetly bland DreamWorks car toon film about a bold

horse that runs across much of the Old West, his thoughts spoken by Mat t Damon, his adventures doused in Bryan Adams tunes that are like a floral tribute to Rod Stewar t. The horse action is swif t, and borrowed John Ford bits can mean nothing to modern kids. 1 hr., 25 mins. (Elliot t) ★★1/2

B I S T R O

Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones (PG) — This is No. 5 in the series and is visually spec-

tacular (entirely filmed in digital, and projected that way in some theaters). It moves swif tly and has action payof fs, but George Lucas is still a turgid story teller, and stif f dialogue drags the actors down to mere plot function too of ten. Ewan McGregor seems to be coming into his own as wise Obi-Wan. 2 hr., 23 mins. (Elliot t) ★★1/2 Stuart Little 2 (PG) — is a sequel capsule, as smooth and shiny as a jellybean. It brings back the Manhat tan mouse (Michael J. Fox), a computerized dearie loved by the Lit tle family as equal to their son, George (Jonathan Lipnicki), and his baby sister. The slow-star ting story is Stuar t's adventure to rescue new pal, birdie Margalo (Melanie Grif fith), a flut ter-ball of gold feathers, from the raptor Falcon (James Woods). 1 hr. 18 mins. (Elliot t) ★★1/2 Undercover Brother (PG-13) — The source was a Web comedy site, and it's a derivation of old bla xploiters, "In Living Color" and the Austin Powers goofs, but this lampoon of black heroics is funny in a pumpedup way. Eddie Grif fin wears the power Afro as the main bro, and Malcolm D. Lee also got good stuf f from Chris Kat tan, Denise Richards, Dave Chappelle, Aunjanue Ellis and Billy Dee Williams as a Colin Powell-like general who wants to be the new Col. Sanders. 1 hr., 26 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ Unfaithful (R) — Richard Gere is Ed, businessman, loyal husband, devoted father, living in a plush suburb of New York City. Wife Connie (Diane Lane) seems equally pampered and happy, but there is something nervy and urban about her and, on a visit to SoHo, a wind storm blows her right into Paul, bookseller and stud, French, with facial stubble wor thy to be a put ting green. Paul is the other man, played by Olivier Mar tinez. It's some af fair, with Lane exposing much skin but also emotions that imply the af fair is a necessary, obsessive risk. The movie has a rather complacent dependence on rote situations. The vivid sex can't disguise the petrified fossils of countless studio melodramas about love triangles and sof t-rot marriages. Cast: Richard Gere, Diane Lane, Olivier Mar tinez, Erik Per Sullivan, Kate Bur ton. Running time: 1 hr., 47 min. (Elliot t) ★★ Windtalkers (R) — The core of it is about the Navajo "code talkers," some 400 men who confounded the Japanese by speaking radio code in Navajo. Of course, in a racist era, they had to face white bigotry as well as the enemy. Adam Beach, a strong presence with a boyish grin, plays Ben Yahzee, code volunteer. Nicolas Cage is Joe Enders, patched-up war dog assigned to protect Ben and, if he faces capture, kill him — also the secret order to Ox (Christian Slater), whose code man is Charlie (Roger Willie). The rest of the Marines unit sent to murderous Saipan in 1944 is much like the old studio ethnic squads of 1944 Hollywood. "Windtalkers" depicts bravery, sacrifice, honor and horror. But the moments of uplif t are like confet ti in a morgue. Cast: Nicolas Cage, Mark Ruf falo, Adam Beach, Peter Stormare, Noah Emmerich, Christian Slater, Frances O'Connor, Roger Willie. Running time: 2 hrs., 8 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ —Capsules compiled from movie reviews writ ten by David Elliot t, film critic for The San Diego Union-Tribune and other staf f writers.

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Cinema: Review

“The Country Bears”: Bad Premise Makes Bad Movie By Rachel Deahl

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n what might be characterized as a perverse twist on the “E! True Hollywood Story,” Disney brings to life this insipid tale about a talking band of grizzlies that reunite for a comeback show. The template for the E! show, which usually follows a trajectory beginning with fame that moves into drug use and rock star excess and ends with either embarrassing “Where are they now?” segments or desperate stories about middle-aged musicians putting together a last-gasp road show, is mutated into a rote G-rated version with frightening puppet-like bears standing in for the humans. The titular crew form a quartet of humanoid creatures (who look something like what you might get if you crossed Alf with Harry from “Harry and the Hendersons”) who, when performing, sound like a watered-down version of the Traveling Wilburys. The bears in the film, of which there are a scant few aside from the members of the band, maintain an inexplicably seamless existence within society. It would be as if, when Gregor Samsa woke from his sleep to discover he had become a grotesquely huge beetle, no one was bothered by the change. The bears here occupy a human space without the benefit or aid of a backstory … they walk, talk and live their lives as recognized members of this alternate universe. The tenable story revolves around a preteen cub, Beary (voiced by Haley Joel Osment), who leaves his human family to meet his idols: The Country Bears. A young bear who feels oddly out of place, Beary is adored by his mother and father

and harassed by his older brother (the only one in the film vocal about the fact that Beary is a former member of the animal kingdom). After Beary asks that most pressing of childhood questions, “Am I adopted?,” his “older brother” takes rueful pleasure in showing the impressionable little grizzly the steel trap his parents rescued him from. What’s a little cub to do when he finds out he is adopted? Run away, of course. Beary heads straight for Country Bear Hall, the famed spot where The Country Bears once performed (think Grand Ole Opry crossed with a log cabin). When the cub arrives, he discovers that the “historic” landmark is in danger of being torn down by a malevolent banker (Christopher Walken). In order to save the building and raise the necessary $20,000 needed to do so, Beary convinces the Bears to try and reunite for one last show. So they dust off the old tour bus and hit the road, trying to round up the old gang and convince them to come back for one last moment in the sun. Based on an attraction at Disneyworld called the “Country Bear Jamboree,” this debacle proves that studios have no shame when it comes to finding source material for their films. It’s not surprising that “The Country Bears” feels like one extended commercial, with various interchangeable musical interludes that look more like a Britney Spears Pepsi ad than a Britney Spears music video (if there is even a discernable difference), since the entire reason for making the film must have been based on the Bears’ pre-existing recognition factor. I can’t wait for “Space Mountain: The Movie.”

Cinema: Preview

“Goldmember”: The Grooviest Movie of the Summer By Rhonda Jones

t’s been three long, agonizing, excruciating years, but he’s finally come back. That international man of mystery. That spy who shagged me. Well. Not me personally. “Goldmember,” the long-awaited, supposedly final installment of the Austin Powers shagorama has been released like the beast it is. Its title character, rumor has it, is yet another excuse for Mike Myers to don yet another of his clever disguises. Here’s the plot. Dr. Evil sets the whole thing off by joining forces with said title character and kidnapping Austin’s daddy Nigel Powers in an effort take over the world. How one leads to another is anybody’s guess, but then we have to have a reason to go see the thing, don’t we? As if Austin weren’t enough. Sigh. Oh, there’s time-travel, which is always fun, back to the year 1975, which wasn’t always fun. There’s an old flame, Austin’s fellow detective Foxxy Cleopatra, who may or may not be a distant cousin of Cassanova Frankenstein from the “Mystery Men” movie. So far, we haven’t been able to get her to talk about that. Fat Bastard returns with the rest of the crew. So steel yourself. It’s probably going to be disgusting. (Remember the chicken grease and “nutty” coffee from the last go ‘round. Ech. I have to sit down.) It promises to be a blast, in true Austin Powers form, complete with power flowers and striped leisure suits. If you can’t wait to make it to the theater for your own personal reunion with the lovable James Bond ripoff, then why don’t you go visit him at his pad? There are plenty of fun things to do there. Your computer screen is the portal. Type in Austin’s URL (Austin loves it when you type in his URL), www.austinpowers.com, and try not to let the music frighten you. It’s rather loud and insistent and monotonous, and always leaves me groping for the mute button.

Austin will be there to greet you, looking like a ‘60s modster and waving his pistol. Follow the buttons to where you want to go. Back in Time is one option, if you would like to revisit, say, “The Spy Who Shagged Me.” Neat idea, but the disembodied heads are a little disconcerting. Beware, though. If you go too far down that corridor, there will be Fembots. And they will play games with you. But hey, you might like it. First, however, let’s enjoy a few memories. We first met Austin back in 1997, during his “International Man of Mystery” tour from the ‘60s to the ‘90s, accomplished by having himself frozen so he could wait for the return of Dr. Evil, who had frozen himself and proceeded to orbit Earth in a Big Boy. With Mrs. Kensington’s kick-ass daughter as his Powers girl, it has “The Avengers” written all over it. Roger Ebert loved it, and that’s sometimes a good sign. He referred to the entire Austin Powers premise as “James Bond meets political correctness.” It’s a spoof, not only of Bond, but of that entire era, as well as our own. When the two times clash, the silliness in both comes to light. You should revisit that movie just for the “zip it” conversation between the Evils, a family almost as dysfunctional as the Skywalkers. Mike Myers only made us wait two years for “The Spy Who Shagged Me,” introducing us to that unforgettable Scotsman, Fat Bastard – who would have made everyone rush right out to revisit Myers’ “So I Married an Axe Murderer,” for more fun with Scottish brogue – if we hadn’t all spent the next week in therapy trying to cleanse our eyeballs of the images of various aspects of the character. Anyway. He’s back. And he’s waiting for you in the dark recesses of your favorite movie theater, starting ... well, now. Mr. Powers himself had only one comment on the subject: “Yeah, bay-bee!”

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REGAL AUGUSTA EXCHANGE 20 Movies Good 7/26 - 8/1 Austin Powers in Goldmember (PG-13) FriSat: 12:00, 12:25, 12:55, 2:40, 3:00, 4:20, 5:05, 5:35, 7:00, 7:30, 8:00, 9:15, 9:45, 10:15, 11:40, 12:10, 12:40; Sun-Thur: 12:00, 12:25, 12:55, 2:40, 3:00, 4:20, 5:05, 5:35, 7:00, 7:30, 8:00, 9:15, 9:45, 10:15 Country Bears (G) Fri-Sat: 12:15, 2:30, 4:45, 7:05, 9:20, 11:35; Sun-Thur: 12:15, 2:30, 4:45, 7:05, 9:20 Stuart Little 2 (PG) Fri-Sat: 12:10, 1:10, 2:15, 3:10, 4:25, 5:10, 7:10, 9:10, 11:15; Sun-Thur: 12:10, 1:10, 2:15, 3:10, 4:25, 5:10, 7:10, 9:10 K-19: The Widowmaker (PG-13) 12:20, 1:00, 3:20, 4:00, 7:05, 7:25, 10:05, 10:25 Eight Legged Freaks (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:55, 3:45, 7:35, 7:55, 9:55, 10:25, 12:15; SunThur: 12:55, 3:45, 7:35, 7:55, 9:55, 10:25 Road to Perdition (R) 12:50, 4:15, 6:55, 9:40, 12:20 Reign of Fire (PG-13) 1:05, 3:35, 7:50, 10:20 Halloween: Resurrection (R) Fri-Sat: 1:20, 3:30, 5:40, 8:15, 10:35, 12:45; Sun-Thur: 1:20, 3:30, 5:40, 8:15, 10:35 Crocodile Hunter (PG) Fri-Sat: 12:00, 2:25, 4:50, 7:20, 10:10, 12:20; Sun-Thur: 12:00, 2:25, 4:50, 7:20, 10:10 Men in Black 2 (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:30, 2:45, 4:55, 7:10, 7:40, 9:25, 9:55, 11:45, 12:10; Sun-Thur: 12:30, 2:45, 4:55, 7:10, 7:40, 9:25, 9:55 Like Mike (PG) Fri-Sat: 12:40, 3:00, 5:20, 7:50, 10:20, 12:45; Sun-Thur: 12:40, 3:00, 5:20, 7:50, 10:20 Mr. Deeds (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:05, 2:35, 5:15, 7:45, 10:05, 12:25; Sun-Thur: 12:05, 2:35, 5:15, 7:45, 10:05 Lilo & Stitch (PG) Fri-Sat: 12:15, 2:20, 4:30, 7:00, 9:15, 11:30; Sun-Thur: 12:15, 2:20, 4:30, 7:00, 9:15 Minority Report (PG-13) 1:05, 4:10, 7:25, 10:40 Scooby Doo (PG) 1:15, 3:25, 5:40 The Bourne Identity (PG-13) 12:45, 3:50, 7:15, 10:15 EVANS 12 CINEMAS Movies Good 7/26 - 8/1 Austin Powers in Goldmember (PG-13) 12:45, 1:45, 2:45, 3:45, 4:45, 5:45, 6:45, 7:45, 8:45, 9:45

Country Bears (G) 1:00, 3:00, 5:00, 7:00, 9:00 Stuart Little 2 (PG) 1:15, 3:15, 5:15, 7:15, 9:15 K-19: The Widowmaker (PG-13) 1:05, 4:05, 6:55, 9:40 Eight Legged Freaks (PG-13) 2:20, 4:50, 7:25, 10:00 Reign of Fire (PG-13) 7:10, 9:25 Road to Perdition (R) 2:10, 4:40, 7:20, 9:50 Crocodile Hunter (PG) 1:30, 3:30, 5:30, 7:30 Halloween: Resurrection (R) 9:30 Men in Black 2 (PG-13) 1:50, 3:50, 5:50, 7:50, 9:50 Like Mike (PG) 12:50, 2:50, 4:50 Mr. Deeds (PG-13) 1:15, 3:25, 5:35, 7:40, 9:55 Lilo & Stitch (PG) 1:10, 3:10, 5:10 Minority Report (PG-13) 6:50, 9:35 Pokemon 3 (G) Tues, Thurs: 10:30 a.m. The Road to El Dorado (PG) Tues, Thurs: 10:30 a.m. MASTERS 7 CINEMAS Movies Good 7/26 - 8/1 Austin Powers in Goldmember (PG-13) 1:00, 3:00, 5:00, 7:00, 9:00 Country Bears (G) 1:20, 3:20, 5:20, 7:20, 9:20 Stuart Little 2 (PG) 1:10, 3:10, 5:10, 7:10, 9:10 K-19: The Widowmaker (PG-13) 1:05, 4:05, 7:05, 9:45 Eight Legged Freaks (PG-13) 1:15, 3:15, 5:15 Halloween: Resurrection (R) 7:15, 9:15 Men in Black 2 (PG-13) 1:25, 3:25, 5:25, 7:25, 9:25 Like Mike (PG) 1:05, 3:05, 5:05, 7:05, 9:05 REGAL 12 CINEMAS Movies Good 7/26 - 8/1 Unfaithful (R) 2:00, 4:35, 7:05, 9:35 Windtalkers (R) 1:50, 4:30, 7:00, 9:30 Spirit (G) 2:20, 4:45, 7:45, 9:55 Juwanna Mann (PG-13) 2:35, 4:55, 7:00, 9:30 Bad Company (PG-13) 2:00, 4:40, 7:15, 9:50 Star Wars: Episode II (PG) 2:30, 5:15, 8:00 Enough (PG-13) 2:15, 4:35, 7:25, 9:50 Undercover Brother (PG-13) 2:40, 5:15, 7:40, 10:05 High Crimes (PG-13) 1:55, 4:30, 7:10, 9:40 Ice Age (PG) 2:10, 5:00, 7:35, 9:55 Changing Lanes (R) 2:05, 5:05, 7:30, 10:00 Blade 2 (R) 2:25, 4:50, 7:20, 9:45

Movie listings are subject to change without notice.

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Arts

Auditions AUDITIONS FOR “CAMELOT,” a musical for Aiken Kidney Benefi t, will be held in Room 115 at USCAiken’s Etherredge Center August 11, 4-7 p.m.; August 12, 7-10 p.m.; and August 15, 7-10 p.m. Par ts for 30 adul ts and five children. Gymnastic abili t y a plus; be prepared to sing, dance and read. Accompanist provided. Per formances November 8-10 at the Etherredge Center. Call David Culp at (803) 648-5253. AUGUSTA CHOR AL SOCIETY will hold auditions August 6 at Covenant Presby terian Church on Walton Way. For more information or to schedule an appointment, contact Carolyn Dolen at 826-4713. THE AUGUSTA PLAYERS will hold auditions for “The King and I” July 25. Held at 7 p.m. at St. John United Methodist Church. Audition consists of a prepared vocal solo and a cold reading. Accompanist provided. Per formance dates scheduled for September 2529. Call 826-4707 for more info.

Education WORKSHOPS AT THE GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART: “Watercolor Excitement with Ink, Session 2” adult/teen workshop 9 a.m.-2 p.m. July 27, $55; “Painting with Acrylic” adult workshop 10 a.m.-1 p.m. July 29-August 1, $100. For more information, call 722-5495. USC-AIKEN MUSIC CONSERVATORY PROGR AM begins in August. Students of all ages and experience levels welcome. Private lessons available for musical instruments and voice; instructors are USC-Aiken facult y and have at least a master’s degree in their per formance area. (803) 641-3288. ARTS INFUSION CONFERENCE July 25-27 at Davidson Fine Ar ts School. Teachers are encouraged to at tend and learn how to integrate the ar ts into the classroom. Georgia teachers receive two staf f development units. To register, call 826-4702, ex t. 3 or visit www.augustaar ts.com.

Exhibitions

“A SUNSET IN PROVENCE” ART SHOW AND AUCTION July 29, 7:30 p.m. at the Cafe du Teau. Original ar twork will be up for auction; Buzz Clif ford and Friends per form jazz. $10 donation at door. Contact Bill Ford, 724-5484, for information. AUGUST ART EXHIBITS AT AREA LIBR ARIES: Linda Baack’s watercolors will be on display at the Gibbs Library; steel sculpture by George Graham will be up at the Euchee Creek Branch Library. Call the Gibbs Library at 863-1946 or the Euchee Creek Branch at 556-0594 for more information.

M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

DIANA GURLEY’S PHOTOGR APHS of Italian coastal towns will be on display at the Juice Bar on Broad Street First Friday, August 2. Call Randy at the Juice Bar, 826-1678. “DE-MYTHING THE GODDESS” EXHIBIT August 4September 29 at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History includes paintings, writings and photography relevant to historical and current perceptions of women’s self-image. Works by Rhian SwainGiboney. Opening reception August 4 from 3-6 p.m. $2 museum admission fee. 651-8712. SAVAGE GALLERY EXHIBIT showcases the pot tery of David Stuar t and sculpture by John B. Savage. For more information, call the gallery at 736-3336. ARNOLD GALLERY in Aiken features new work by Mary Alice Lockhar t and Al Beyer. Call (803) 502-1100. ART ON BROAD features pot tery by local ar tists Jerry Pruit t and Carol Craig. Also features oil paintings by Russ Bonin and Raku pot tery by Peter Alsen. Call 722-1028. BILLY S exhibits at the Metro Cof feehouse throughout July. For more information, call 722-6468. AT WARE’S FOLLY AND THE WALKER-MACKENZIE STUDIO through August 2: “If These Walls Could Talk,” “Impressions of the Print: Recent Works by Alex Murawski and Tom Hammond,” “Ger trude Herber t Youth and Adult Student Exhibit.” Call the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t, 722-5495. JAY JACOBS exhibits new work at the Soul Bar in July. For more information, call the Soul Bar at 724-8880. AT THE MARY PAULINE GALLERY through July 27: Lanny Webb Exhibition, Front Gallery; Summer Group Exhibition, Rear Gallery. From August 1 to September 21, Arless Day exhibits “Collages & Unique Variations.” Opening reception is August 1, 58 p.m. Call 724-9542 or visit www.marypaulinegallery.com for details. “OVER THE LINE: THE ART AND LIFE OF JACOB LAWRENCE” ex hibi t through September 8 at the High Museum of Ar t in Atlanta. For more information, call (404) 733-HIGH or visi t w w w.high.org on the Web. FINE ARTS EXHIBITION through July 28 at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History. Features works by the Benedict College Ar t Facult y. Call 7243576 for more info. DANIEL HAYES exhibits his work at Borders Books and Music through the end of July. Upcoming exhibits include: Tom Klose in August, Carl Purdy in September, Alex McCain in October and Rober t Lee in November. Call Borders Books and Music at 7376962 for more information.

Art shows, pots and the fire o’ the kiln. All this and more can be found at Tire City Potters on Ellis Street, yet another artists’ collective that has sprung up downtown.

Dance SINGLES DANCE each Saturday night from 8-11 p.m. sponsored by the Christian Social Organization for Single Adults. Held at Westside High School. Tickets at the door; free dance lessons at 7 p.m. For more information, call 278-6422.

Music “SOUNDS OF SUMMER” CONCERTS per formed by the Peach State Chorus of Sweet Adelines: August 3 at 3 and 8 p.m., the group per forms at the Aiken Community Playhouse; August 10 at 7 p.m., the group per forms at Lakeside High School in Evans. $12 for adults, $8 for kids. Call (803) 649-1710 or (803) 6490689 for information on the Aiken shows and 3649931 or 279-6499 for information on the Evans show. MUSIC EXPLOSION at Riverwalk’s Eighth Street Bulkhead August 4, 11, 18 and 25 from 8 to 9:30 p.m. Picnic, dance and enjoy the sounds of local musicians. 821-1754. COLUMBIA COUNTY CHOR AL SOCIETY OPEN HOUSE August 13, 7:30 p.m. at First Baptist Church of Evans. Open to inquiring singers and friends. For information, call 364-5920. CANDLELIGHT CONCERT IN THE PARK 8 p.m. August 2 at Creighton Living History Park in Nor th Augusta. Bring a candle and a blanket or chair and enjoy the music in the park. Call (803) 442-7588 for more information.

PIANIST HELEN BEEDLE comes all the way from Heller town, Pa., to wrap up the Evenings in the Appleby Garden concer t series. July 30 show features salon and concer t music from the 1860s and begins at 8 p.m. in the garden of the Appleby Branch Library. For information, call 736-6244. GOSPEL FEST featuring John P. Kee and the New Life Communit y Singers July 27 at For t Gordon’s Bar ton Field. Concer t begins at 5 p.m. Free and open to the public; lawn chairs are welcome. Contact Maggie McDonald at 771-1449 or Connie Moore at 855-5791. CONCERT AND ART IN THE PARK at Creighton Living Histor y Park in Nor th Augusta: July 25 at 8 p.m., Sophisticated Swing Big Band. Bring a picnic and lawn chairs or blankets to this free show. (803) 442-7588. HOPELANDS SUMMER CONCERT SERIES continues July 29 with the Chris Mangelly Quar tet. Begins 7 p.m. at Hopeland Gardens in Aiken. For rain information and for those who need special assistance or accommodations, call 642-7631.

Theater

“POLLYANNA,” presented by the Young Ar tists Reper tory Theatre Company July 26 and 27 at 8 p.m., July 27 and 28 at 3 p.m. in the Goodwin Commons of the Augusta Preparator y Day School. Tickets are $8 adul ts, $5 students and

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seniors. 373-0605. “FAME” will be at the Aiken Communit y Playhouse July 26 and 27. Presented by Youth Wing Productions. Ticket prices are $12/adults, $10/seniors, $8/students and $5/children 12 and under.For tickets, visit www.atlantic.net/~acp online or call (803) 648-1438.

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Yee-ha! The USC Aiken Summer Rodeo is this weekend, both July 26 & 27, at the Hippodrome Horse Complex on the Aiken-Augusta Hwy. in North Augusta. For tickets visit www.tixonline.com. There is also an outlet inside Harmon Optical in Southgate Plaza, Augusta. You can also charge by phone at (803) 278-4TIX (4849). For more info call (803) 279-8017 or e-mail tix@tixonline.com.

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“ALL IN THE TIMING” July 25-27 at the For t Gordon Per forming Ar ts Theatre. Dinner is at 7 p.m. with the show star ting at 8 p.m. Tickets are $30; $28 for seniors 65 and over. Phone 793-8552. NEIL SIMON’S “PROPOSALS” July 26-27 and August 2-3. Show times: 8 p.m. with 3 p.m. matinee July 27. Presented at the Abbeville Opera House in Abbeville, S.C. Tickets are $15 adults, $14 for seniors and children under 12. Call (864) 459-2157.

Attractions RIVERBANKS ZOO AND GARDEN EXTENDED HOURS: Admission gates open at 9 a.m. and close at 5 p.m. Weekday admission is 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Regular admission is $7.75 adults, $5.25 for children ages 3-12. Call (803) 779-8717 or visit www.riverbanks.org. THE BOYHOOD HOME OF WOODROW WILSON: Circa 1859 Presby terian manse occupied by the family of President Woodrow Wilson as a child during the Civil War and Reconstruction. Original and period antiques, restored house, kitchen and carriage house. 419 Telfair Street. Open 10 a.m. 5 p.m., Tues.-Sat. Tours available; groups of 10 or more by appointment only. Admission is $5 adults, $4 seniors, $3 students under 18 and free for ages five and under. 724-0436. AUGUSTA GOLF & GARDENS OF THE GEORGIA GOLF HALL OF FAME features beautiful display gardens, as well as bronze sculptures of some of golf’s greatest masters. Available for rent for a variet y of functions. Group discount rates available. Closed Mondays; open from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Tues.-Sat.; open from 1 to 5 p.m. on Sunday. Admission is $5.50 for adults; $4.50 for students, seniors and military; $3.50 for children (4 to 12); free for children 3 and under. Sundays are two for one with a Super Sunday coupon. Annual garden memberships are available. Call 724-4443 or 1-888-874-4443. Also, visit their Web site at www.gghf.org. FORT DISCOVERY/NATIONAL SCIENCE CENTER: Children and adults alike can immerse themselves in the wonders of science through live demonstrations, vir tual realities, Starlab, KidScape and more than 270 hands-on exhibits. General Admission: $8 for adults; $6 for children, seniors and active military. Group rates available. Half-price admission daily af ter 3 p.m. Operating hours: Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sunday, noon-5 p.m. Call 821-0200, 1-800325-5445 or visit their Web site at www.NationalScienceCenter.org.

REDCLIFFE STATE HISTORIC SITE: 1859 mansion of S.C. Governor James Henry Hammond, held by the family for three generations until 1975. Hours are 9 a.m.-6 p.m., Thursday-Monday on the grounds. House tours are noon-3 p.m. by appointment. Closed Tuesday and Wednesday. Admission to the grounds is free. Fee for house tours is $3 for adults and children ages 6 to 17. For more information, call (803) 827-1473. 181 Redclif fe Road, Beech Island. SACRED HEART CULTUR AL CENTER is of fering tours of its 100-year-old building. Mon.-Fri., 9 a.m.-5 p.m. $1 per person, children free. 826-4700. HISTORIC COTTON EXCHANGE WELCOME CENTER: Open Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-6 p.m.; Sun. 1-5 p.m. Riverwalk. Free. 724-4067. THE EZEKIEL HARRIS HOUSE: Deemed “the finest 18th century house sur viving in Georgia” by the “Smithsonian Guide to Historic America.” Open Saturday, 10 a.m.-1 p.m. General admission is $2; senior admission is $1 and children get in for 50 cents. For more information, call 724-0436.

Museums

THE MUSEUM OF LAUREL AND HARDY OF HARLEM, GEORGIA is now open and features displays of various Laurel and Hardy memorabilia; films also shown. Located at 250 N. Louisville Street in downtown Harlem. Open 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Wed.-Sat. and 1-4 p.m. Sundays through October 14. Af ter October 14, hours are 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Fri.-Sat. and 1-4 p.m. Sundays. For more information, call 556-3448. AT THE MORRIS MUSEUM OF ART: “Masterworks of Southern Ar t Tour” July 28, 2 p.m., is of fered on free admission day to the museum. First Friday, August 2, features Latin rhy thms by Vacunao from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. Free admission. Call 724-7501. LUNCH AT NOON LECTURE SERIES held the second Wednesday of ever y month at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History, 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Call the museum at 724-3576 for more information. EVENTS AT THE AUGUSTA MUSEUM OF HISTORY: “Keepers of the Faith: A History of Organized Religion in Augusta” exhibit opens July 27 and runs through November 10. August’s film is “Heritage of the Black West” and will be playing, free with admission, continuously in the History Theatre. Call 7228454 or visit www.augustamuseum.org. “THE TIES THAT BIND” African-American Ar t and Heritage Tour Program available to students in grades 3-12. Prior to touring the Morris Museum, a museum docent visits students in their classroom and provides a slide orientation. Available yearround, Tuesday-Friday, and must be scheduled at least two weeks in advance. Call the Morris Museum of Ar t at 724-7501 or visit the museum Web site at www.themorris.org.

Special Events BOOK SIGNINGS AT BORDERS BOOKS AND MUSIC: July 26, 6-8 p.m., Marilyn McDonald signs “Power of the 23rd Pslam”; July 27, 1-3 p.m., Karen Calloway signs “Quick Cooking with Karen Calloway.” 737-6962. PARTRIDGE INN BRIDAL SHOW August 4, 6-9 p.m., in the Inn’s Morris Par tridge Ballroom. Area wedding vendors will be on hand to showcase their ser vices; tours of The Par tridge Inn’s wedding facilities will be conducted. Tickets are $10. 737-2428. PORTER FLEMING WRITING COMPETITION entr y deadline is August 1. $10 entr y fee. Categories are non-fiction, poetr y, script wri ting, and fiction. Winners invi ted to par ticipate in a special li terar y program at the Ar ts in the Hear t festival. Contact the Greater Augusta Ar ts Council for entr y forms at 826-4702. AUTISM AWARENESS DAY EVENT August 3 at WalMar t in Nor th Augusta. Sponsored by Unlocking Autism, a national non-profit organization promoting understanding and research. For more information, contact Maurine Meleck at (803) 819-1426. JULY FEST July 27 at the Aiken Jaycee Fairgrounds. Held 10 a.m. to 8 p.m. and features carnival games, story telling, ar ts and craf ts, contests, vendor displays and live enter tainment. Price is $3 for adults, $1 for kids ages 6-16 and free for kids 5 and under. For more information, call (803) 642-7635. ALL-STAR WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP RODEO July 26-27 at the Hippodrome in Nor th Augusta. Tickets are $9 in advance and $12 the day of the show for adults; $6 advance and $8 day of show for kids 10 and under. For tickets, call (803) 278-4TIX or visit www.tixonline.com. “ADVOCATING FOR YOUR CHILD’S EDUCATION” WORKSHOP July 27 at the ACS Conference Room, Room 367 of Building 33720 at For t Gordon. Held 10 a.m. to 2 p.m.; free and open to the public. Call Army Communit y Ser vice at 791-3579. SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE features food, fun and music by the hot test bands in the CSRA. Held at Riverwalk’s Eighth Street Plaza from 7-11 p.m. July 27 and August 3, 10, 17, 24 and 31. Phone 821-1754. TEACHER ORIENTATION AT PHINIZY SWAMP NATURE PARK July 30. Teachers are invited to discover field trip oppor tunities at the park. Held 9 a.m. to noon. Event is free of charge, but there are a limited number of spots available, so register before July 29. Call 828-2109. COLUMBIA COUNTY HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. and ever y Sunday from 1 to 4 p.m. at PetsMar t. For more info, call 860-5020.

RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL AND AUGUSTA ANIMAL RESCUE FRIENDS holds pet adoptions at Superpetz of f Bobby Jones Expressway every Sunday from 1 to 4 p.m. Call AARF at 3644747 or visit www.aar f.net. Adoptions also held at the Richmond Count y Animal Control Shelter, Tues. through Sun., 1-5 p.m. Call the shelter at 790-6836. LOW-COST R ABIES VACCINATIONS: AugustaRichmond Count y Animal Control holds low-cost rabies vaccination clinics the four th Sunday of every month for privately owned pets. $8 per animal. 1 p.m. at Superpetz. Dogs must be on a leash and cats in a carrier. Puppies and kit tens must be three months old and current for all vaccinations. Schedule subject to change, so please call 790-6836 to verify dates and times. THE CSR A HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions ever y Saturday from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. and ever y Wednesday evening from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. at the Pet Center located behind the GreenJackets Stadium on Milledge Rd. 261-PETS.

Out of Town

Le a r n i n g t o l i v e h e a l t h i e r l i v e s .

Join Senior Friends today! Call 651-6716 or register online.

Free Chair Exercise Class* Monday, Wednesday & Friday 8:45 - 9:30 am Members only. Please call to register.

Join our Cradle Club today! Membership is FREE. Call 651-BABY (2229) or register online. Tuesdays, July 23–August 27 Mondays, July 29–August 26 7:00 – 9:30 pm

“Get To Know Us” Breakfast*

Saturday Express Prepared Childbirth** Saturday, August 17, 9:00 am – 5:00 pm

Tuesday, August 6, 6:00 pm Location: 6 East Rehabilitation Dining Room. Educational program and a time for those who have had a stroke to share their experience with others. For more information call,651-6160.

Labor & Delivery Tour

You’re A Big Girl Now**

Tuesday, August 13, 10:00 am New and current members are invited to have breakfast and learn about all the exciting activities planned for the coming months.

*These Senior Friends programs will be held at Doctors Hospital Campus, Building III,1305 Interstate Parkway.

THE JEKYLL ISLAND MUSICAL THEATRE presents three plays in rotating reper tory through July 28 at the Jek yll Island Amphitheatre in Jek yll Island, Ga. “HONK!”, “Oklahoma!” and “1776” will be presented. Call (912) 635-4060 for details.

The New Life Community Choir, featuring Stellar Award winner and Grammy nominee John P. Kee, will perform at Fort Gordon’s Outdoor Gospel Festival. July 27 at 5 p.m., James Bignon, the Deliverance Mass Choir, Voices of Faith, Voices of Praise, Beulah Grove and more gospel choirs join the New Life Community Choir on Barton Field. Bring lawn chairs, blankets and water bottles. The concert is free and open to the public.

Thursday, August 22, 7:00 – 8:30 pm

Stroke Support Group

Sunday, August 4, 2:00 – 3:30 pm

Saturday, August 10, 10:00 am - Noon This class is for girls ages 9–12 and their mothers. Discussions focus on puberty, adolescence and ways to “survive” the changes they bring.

Baby Care**

Diabetes Support Group

Baby’s Brother and Sister**

Sunday, August 4, 4:00 – 6:30 pm

Infant CPR**

Thursday, August 15, 6:30 – 9:00 pm

Breastfeeding Class**

Thursday, August 1, 6:30 – 8:30 pm **

These classes will be held at Doctors Hospital Campus 3624 J. Dewey Gray Circle, Augusta, Georgia Medical Office Building II, Cradle Club Classroom, Suite 210.

Tuesday, August 13, 6:00 pm Location: Doctors Hospital, First Floor, Day Surgery waiting Area. An educational seminar offered the second Tuesday every other month for the person with diabetes and his/her family members. For more information call 651-2468.

Growing into Adolescence** Saturday, August 24, 9:00 am - Noon This class if for boys ages 9–12, along with their fathers or a male relative. Open discussions center on how each boy can “survive” the changes that come with puberty.

Community Health Screenings Wednesday, August 28, 7:30 –10:30 am Location: Doctors Hospital, First Floor, Classrooms 1 & 2. Health screenings include free cholesterol, blood sugar and blood pressure testing. For only $5 a TSH (Thyroid Screening) will be offered. Registration is not required. For information, call 651-6280.

NATIONAL BLACK ARTS FESTIVAL in Atlanta runs through July 28. Dance, film screenings, theatre, music, literary events, workshops and family activities. For a complete list of events, including dates and ticket prices, visit www.nbaf.org or phone (404) 730-0176.

SOUTHERN STATES TRIPLE CROWN HORSE SHOW at the Georgia National Fairgrounds and Agricenter in Perry, Ga., July 25-28. Call 1-800-987-3247.

Minimizing Hip & Knee Pain August 21, 3:00 – 5:00 pm Senior Friends, Building III,1305 Interstate Parkway. (Doctors Hospital Campus). Join Dr. Robert Brand and Dr. Keith Harden for this special presentation and learn how to protect your joints from wear and tear and your treatment options. Refreshments served. Please call 651-2450 to register.

Every 2nd and 4th Monday 1:00 pm Members only. Please call to register.

GEORGIA MOUNTAIN FAIR August 7-18 in Hiawassee, Ga. Midway and carnival rides, craf ts and exhibits, historical demonstrations, pioneer village, fireworks, parade and more. Call (706) 8964191 or visit www.georgia-mountain-fair.com.

ADOPTION INFORMATION SESSION at the Independent Adoption Center in Tucker, Ga., August 3, 9:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. For reser vations, call 1800-385-4016.

Prepared Childbirth**

Bridge/Hearts/Canasta Group*

MASTERS OF THE AMERICAN WATERCOLOR, SOUTH CAROLINA WATERCOLOR SOCIETY exhibits run through August 18 at the Columbia Museum of Ar t in Columbia, S.C. Gallery talk by Angela Bradburn August 3 at 1 p.m. Visit www.columbiamuseum.org or call (803) 799-2810.

SUMMER EVENING CONCERTS AT BILTMORE ESTATE in Asheville, N.C. Bruce Hornsby, Aug. 2; Guy Lombardo’s Royal Canadians wi th Al Pierson, Aug. 3; Ar turo Sandoval, Aug. 10; Beach Night wi th Maurice Williams and the Zodiacs, the Embers and Feli x Cavaliere’s Rascals, Aug. 16; Randy Newman, Aug 17; Pat t y Loveless, Aug. 24; and the Indigo Girls, Aug. 31. For reser vations, call 1-800-543-2961.

Cradle Club is a complimentary service for expecting parents. Benefits include educational classes, special discounts and a monthly newsletter.

FREE Smoking Cessation Classes: Freshstart Mondays, August 5–26, 6:00 – 7:00 pm The American Cancer Society’s 4-week course, consisting of four one-hour sessions, is designed to help participants stop smoking by providing essential information and strategies. FREE. To pre-register, call 651-2229.

Doctors Hospital •

3651

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INTERNATIONAL FESTIVAL runs through 34 FLORIDA July 27 in Day tona Beach, Fla. Per forming ar ts

July 25 for ages 9-12. 2:30-4 p.m. Call 722-6275.

series features the London Symphony Orchestra. Call

YOUTH LEADERSHIP DEVELOPMENT SKILLS PROGR AM for teens ages 12-19 held the third Saturday of the month at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History. Call 724-3576.

Atlanta. Showcase concer ts, educational panels, a job fair and more. Three-day wristbands for showcase per formances are $25; full conference registration is $165 in advance or $200 walk-up. For more information, call (770) 499-8600 or visit www.atlantismusic.com.

SIBSHOPS ever y third Saturday of the month at the MCG Children’s Medical Center Conference Center. This program is designed for siblings of children with special health and developmental needs. Phone 721KIDS for information.

M E (386) 252-1511, ex t. 2487 for more information. T R THE ATLANTIS MUSIC CONFERENCE July 31 O through August 3 at various venues throughout S P I R I T

WEEKLY STORY SESSIONS at all branch libraries. Visit www.ecgrl.public.lib.ga.us for more information.

J ATLANTA BUCK AR AMA spor tsman’s show features U exhibits, speakers and door prizes. August 1-4 at the L Atlanta Expo Center. Fundraising event sponsored by Y

FIRST SATURDAY STORYTELLING at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum. In addition, there is a tour of the museum. Held 10 a.m. to noon the first Saturday of the month. Call 724-3576.

the Georgia Wildlife Federation to fund conser vation 2 education ef for ts. Admission is $7/adults, $4/seniors 5 and kids 6-12; kids under 6 are free. For more info, contact Doug Rithmire at (770) 787-7887. 2 0 0 2

Seniors

Benefits

PEOPLE WITH ARTHRITIS CAN EXERCISE (PACE) meets at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital Tuesdays and Thursdays from 1-2 p.m. Call 823-5294.

SUMMER BEACH PARTY AND DANCE to benefit the American Cancer Societ y August 9 in the Radisson River front Hotel Ballroom. 7:30 to 11:30 p.m. Live music by The Fabulous Expressions and dancing, as well as an auction. Tickets are $37.50/person or $65/couple and are available at the American Cancer Societ y of fice or by phone at 731-9900.

THE SENIOR CITIZENS COUNCIL OF GREATER AUGUSTA AND THE CSR A of fers a variet y of classes, including aerobics, quilting, tai chi, Spanish, painting, line dancing, bowling, bridge, crochet, pool/billiards, drawing and pinochle. For dates and times, phone 826-4480.

MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS BENEFIT GOSPEL SING featuring the Promise Land Singers July 27 at 5 p.m. Held at First Baptist Church of Gracewood. Contact Teresa Gauldin at 667-4280. SCHOOL SUPPLY DRIVE through July 27 for children from low-income families. Drop boxes for donations at the following locations: Aiken Count y Rec Center, Harrison-Caver Park, Wal-Mar t in Aiken, Kroger on Universit y Parkway, Aiken Regional Medical Center, SRP Federal Credit Union and Heritage South Federal Credit Union. Call (803) 663-6142. AMERICAN RED CROSS BLOOD DRIVES at the Aiken Red Cross Blood Center on Millbrook Drive and the Augusta Red Cross Blood Center on Pleasant Home Road. The bloodmobile will also stop at various area locations this week. For a complete list, call the Aiken Blood Center at (803) 642-5180 or the Augusta Blood Center at 868-8800.

Learning UNIVERSITY OF GEORGIA SMALL BUSINESS OUTREACH SERVICES is holding the following workshops: “Star ting Your Own Business” August 6 and “Writing a Business Plan” August 20. 6:30-8:30 p.m. at the Small Business Outreach Services/Small Business Development Center Augusta Office on Claussen Road. $35 fee per workshop. Call 737-1790. COMPUTER CLASS AT THE WALLACE BR ANCH LIBR ARY: “Introduction to Windows Computer Training” July 27, 12:30-5 p.m. Call 722-6275. AUGUSTA STATE UNIVERSITY CONTINUING EDUCATION is now of fering the following classes: Digital Photography for Beginners, Intermediate Photography, Stained Glass and Intermediate Shag I. Also, ASU of fers online courses. For more information, call 737-1636 or visit www.ced.aug.edu. AIKEN TECH CONTINUING EDUCATION is now of fering the following courses: Intro to Computers, Creating Web Pages, Intro to Massage Therapy, Intro to Java Script, Driver Education, and more. Classes begin in July and August. Aiken Tech also of fers Education to Go classes online. For more information or to register, call (803) 593-9231, ex t. 1230.

Health

ARTHRITIS AQUATICS offered Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital. Classes meet 9-9:45 a.m., 10-10:45 a.m. or 12:15-1 p.m. $37.50/month. To register, call 733-5959. SENIORNET provides adults age 50 and over education for and access to computer technology. Many dif ferent courses are of fered. Contact the USC-Aiken Continuing Education Of fice at (803) 641-3563.

Helen Beedle, pianist, will be playing “Salon & Concert Music of the 1860s” at the Appleby Branch Library, Tuesday, July 30th at 8:00 p.m. a.m. to noon Monday, Wednesday and Friday and 6:30-8:30 p.m. Monday through Thursday. $10 per class or $60 a month for unlimited classes. Mats are provided, but bring a towel and a water bot tle. Call Tess at 738-2782 for more information.

spor ts of fered are football, cheerleading, soccer, baseball and sof tball. $50 fee for first child, $45 for second child and $35 for third; out-of-count y residents pay double. Visit www.co.columbia.ga.us or call 863-7523.

A FREE WOMEN’S HEALTH CLINIC is held from 6-8 p.m. on the first and third Thursday of each month at the Salvation Army and Welfare Center, 1383 Greene St. Ser vices include Pap smear, breast exam and the diagnosis and treatment of sexually transmit ted diseases. For more info or an appointment, call the St. Vincent dePaul Health Center at 828-3444.

TEEN ADVISORY COUNCIL AT THE MORRIS MUSEUM OF ART begins in September. Members meet weekly to plan museum events for young adults. Applications must be received by August 31 and can be obtained by contacting Victoria Durrer at 828-3865.

W.G. WATSON, M.D., WOMEN’S CENTER CONDUCTS EDUCATION CLASSES at Universit y Hospital. Course topics include Lamaze, breastfeeding, parenting and grandparenting. Par tners will learn positive suppor t techniques. There are also programs designed to help older siblings adjust to new family members. Some classes are free, while others require a fee. Registration is required by calling 774-2825.

Kids HOMESCHOOL FUN FAIR AND USED BOOK SALE August 3, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. at St. Mark United Methodist Church. Info for parents of homeschooled children, health screenings. $3/person or $5/family. 736-2976. “STUDY SKILLS THAT STICK” CHILDREN’S WORKSHOP with Yolanda Davis August 5 from 10 a.m. to noon at the Friedman Branch Library. “How to Improve Your Child’s Education” parents’ workshop August 17, 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. Call the library at 736-6758.

YOGA CLASSES at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital are held on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 7-8 a.m. for $45/month or 10:30 a.m. to noon for $55/month. Call 823-6294.

BR AIDS AND CUTS DAY, August 5 from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., is sponsored by the Aiken Count y Recreation Center. Cer tified barbers and hair technicians donate their time to help kids look their best for the first day of school. Call Tony at (803) 663-6142.

FREE HIV/AIDS TESTING every Tuesday from 4 to 7 p.m. at St. Stephen’s Ministry, 922 Greene Street. Free anonymous testing, pre- and post-test counseling and education.

ACADEMIC HELP AND TUTORING available Saturdays, 2:30-4:30 p.m. at the Wallace Branch Library. Call 722-6275 to make arrangements.

HATHA YOGA CLASSES at the St. Joseph Home Health Care Center in Daniel Village Plaza. Held 10

COLUMBIA COUNTY RECREATION SPORTS REGISTR ATION August 5-17 at Patriots Park. Hours are Mon.-Fri., 8 a.m.-7 p.m. and Sat. 9 a.m.-1 p.m. Fall

T.A.G. BALL is sponsored by Teens in Action with Goals and will be held 8 p.m. August 3 at the Henry H. Brigham Community Center Gymnasium on Golden Camp Drive. Tickets are $5/person; call 792-1088. BACK-TO-SCHOOL FESTIVALS feature information for elementary and middle school students and their parents. Physical exams and immunization and nutrition information will be available in addition to registration for ex tra-curricular activities. The Columbia Count y festival will be held August 3, 10 a.m.-3 p.m. at Evans High School; Richmond Count y festival August 4, 12:30 - 6 p.m. at the Augusta Mall; and Aiken Count y festival is August 10, 10 a.m. - 3 p.m. at the Weeks Center. Call Beth Frits, 364-6400. GIRLS INCORPORATED AFTER-SCHOOL PROGRAM begins August 12 and runs through the end of the 2002-2003 school year. A variety of programs will be offered. Services include van pick-up at select schools, evening drop-off, homework room and hot evening meal. Open to girls in kindergar ten through high school. Open 9 a.m.-5:30 p.m. for registration star ting August 5. Af ter-school program offered 2:306 p.m. Mon.-Fri. For more information, call 733-2512. BOB ABDOU, MR. PUPPET, presents a show July 31 at 10:30 a.m. in the Episcopal Day School Gymnasium. For more info, call 736-6244. LIVE ANIMALS FROM THE SAVANNAH RIVER ECOLOGY LAB with Shaun Poppy July 30. Preschoolers show at 10:30 a.m.; 11 a.m for school-age children. Call the Friedman Branch Library at 736-6758 for more info. EVENTS AT THE MAXWELL BR ANCH LIBR ARY: “Introduction to Computers” one-session class of fered July 26 and August 2, 9, 16, 23 and 30, 9:30-11 a.m.; African-American Stories and Puppets with Bret Hupp July 25, 10:30 a.m. Phone 793-2020. CRAFT WORKSHOP at the Wallace Branch Library July

Sports DIXIE YOUTH BASEBALL TOURNAMENT July 27August 3 at Diamond Lakes Regional Park. Call the park at 771-2979. SOCCER CAMP for kids ages 5-18 at Citizens Park. Held July 29-August 2. For registration info, phone (803) 642-7761. AIKEN-AUGUSTA SWIM LEAGUE is holding try-out sessions for the 2002-2003 season. Try-out July 29 at USC-Aiken is open 4-5 p.m. for ages 10 and under and 5-6 p.m. for 11 and older; try-out July 30 at Augusta State Universit y open 6-7 p.m. for 10 and under and 7-8 p.m. for those 11 and up. Call Ken Heis at (803) 613-0202; also, visit www.swimasl.org. ADULT FALL SOFTBALL REGISTR ATION through August 10 at Diamond Lakes Regional Park. Call 771-2979. YOUTH MONTHLY SPARRING the last Thursday of the month, 5:30 p.m., at the Augusta Boxing Club. Call 733-7533. BEGINNER’S ADULT HOCKEY LEAGUE held through August 15 at the Augusta Ice Spor ts Center. Contact Kyle Schultz at 724-4423 or the Augusta Ice Spor ts Center at 863-0061. AUGUSTA RECREATION AND PARKS SUMMER SWIMMING POOLS now open. Pools are located at Dyess Park, May Park, Jones Pool and Fleming Pool. Call 796-5025. OPEN SWIM at the Smith Hazel pool through August. Held Monday-Friday, 1-6 p.m.; Saturday, noon-5 p.m.; Sunday, 1-5 p.m. Cost for children is 50 cents and adults pay $1. Call (803) 642-7755 for more information. AUGUSTA STALLIONS LAST HOME GAME for the 2002 season is July 27. Contact the ticket of fice at 738-9539. AUGUSTA GREENJACKETS HOME GAMES July 25-26 and 31; August 1-3, 14-21, 26-28 and 30-31; and September 1-2. Ticket prices range from $6-$8, with discounts for children and seniors. Sundays are Family Fest/Junior Jacket days, Tuesdays are “Two Fer” Tuesdays/Team Trivia and Thursdays are Thirsty Thursdays. For tickets, call 736-7889 or go to www.tixonline.com. Also check out www.greenjackets.net.

THE G.O.A.L.L.S. PROGR AM AT WALTON REHABILITATION HOSPITAL is of fering golf clinics for those with physical disabilities. Clinics are planned for the second Tuesday of each month at the First Tee of Augusta. Golfers do not have to be af filiated with Walton to par ticipate. If you are interested, call Judie Thompson, G.O.A.L.L.S. Coordinator, 823-8691.

Volunteer THE JERRY LEWIS LABOR DAY TELETHON needs local volunteers to fill the following positions: phone operators, pledge verification, pledge tally, green room, production assistant. Groups and individuals welcome. Telethon is September 2, and volunteers work flexible shif ts. Call 738-8543. OLDER AMERICANS ACT SENIOR NUTRITION PROGR AM is looking for volunteers to ser ve meals to needy older residents. To volunteer, contact the Senior Citizens Council at 826-4480. For those in need of home-delivered meals, call 210-2018 or toll free at 1-888-922-4464. AUGUSTA-RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL: New volunteer orientation is scheduled the first Saturday of ever y month at 11 a.m. at the shelter, 4164 Mack Lane. Schedule subject to change; call 790-6836 to verify dates and times. THE CSR A HUMANE SOCIETY is looking for animal lovers willing to donate a lit tle of their time. Volunteers are needed every Saturday at the Pet Center located behind GreenJackets Stadium on Milledge Road. Call 261-PETS for more info. SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER is seeking donors to prevent a blood supply shor tage. To donate call 737-4551, 854-1880 or (803) 643-7996.

Meetings RIVERWALK TOASTMASTERS meets Mondays, 7 p.m. in Classroom 3 at Universit y Hospital. Call Gale Kan, 855-7071.

THE AUGUSTA COALITION FOR MENTAL HEALTH ADVOCACY meets August 7, 5:30 p.m. at Friendship Communit y Center on Central Avenue. Call Elizabeth Frank at 721-6696 for more details. AUGUSTA TOASTMASTERS CLUB #326 meets Thursdays at 7:30 p.m. at Advent Lutheran Church. Call 868-8431. THE AUGUSTA CHAPTER OF INTERNATIONAL ASSOCIATION OF ADMINISTR ATIVE PROFESSIONALS meets the third Tuesday of each month at 6 p.m. in the Universit y Hospital Dining Room. Contact Sunshine Prescot t-Aiu at 721-3448 or visit ht tp://iaap-fairways.tripod.com/iaap. BUSINESS NETWORKERS INTERNATIONAL Augusta Chapter meets every Thursday morning from 7 to 8:30 a.m. in the Par tridge Inn main dining room. All professionals welcome; break fast provided for a fee. Call Stuar t Rayburn, 737-0050. AUGUSTA CHAPTER OF THE AMERICAN SINGLES GOLF ASSOCIATION meets the second Thursday of each month at Damon’s Restaurant from 6:30-8:30 p.m. RSVP by noon the Tuesday prior to meeting at 24 hour hotline: (803) 441-6741 or 650-1254. ASGA also holds golf outings and socials. Call (803) 4416741 or 1-888-465-3628 for more information.

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THE AUGUSTA SKI AND OUTING CLUB is a nonprofit organization for those who enjoy snow skiing, boating, camping, whitewater raf ting, cycling and other outdoor recreation. Meets 6:45 p.m. the first Tuesday of every month at the Cot ton Patch. Club interests should call (803) 279-6186. AUGUSTA CHAPTER OF PEOPLE FIRST, a self-advocacy group for people with disabilities, holds meetings the last Monday of each month at St. Marks United Methodist Church from 6-8 p.m. For more information, call 399-9869. GUIDELINES: Public Service announcements are listed in this section without charge at the discretion of the editor. Announcements must be received by Monday at noon and will be included as space permits. Send to Events, The Metropolitan Spirit, P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA, 30914 or Fa x (706) 733-6663. Listings cannot be taken over the phone.

You've heard the bad news about the Catholic Church. Now learn the good news about the Catholic Church's Savior, Jesus Christ. The Church of the Most Holy Trinity Georgia's Oldest Catholic Church Corner of Telfair and Eighth Streets, Downtown

Invites you to begin a journey that leads to full communion with the Catholic Church, founded by Jesus Christ. For more information or to register for the September Program call 722-4944 or email cww_mht@bellsouth.net Jesus Christ to Saint Peter the first Pope: “You are rock and upon this rock I will build my Church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against her.” — Matthew 16:18

Sunday Mass 5:00pm (Saturday) 7:45am • 10:00am • 12:30pm

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36 M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

Music Two Big Local Music Events This Weekend

ur hometown boys ‘n’ girls have come up with a couple of really cool music events for you to enjoy this weekend: Saturday Night Live and Meltdown 2002. Saturday Night Live has nothing to do with the late night variety show that we all know and love, but it does take place on Saturday night. Imagine that. It is the brainchild of Cotton Patch owner Bryan Mitchell, Riverwalk Special Events Coordinator Rommie Thompson and City Administrator George Kolb. “Rommie and I and George Kolb came up with it based on events similar to that in Richmond, Va., and the metropolitan (Washington) D.C. Market,” Mitchell explained. Mitchell is from D.C.; Kolb is from Richmond. “It’s turned out to be successful in other towns,” Mitchell explained. The event will take place on the brick plaza where that big gusher of a fountain used to be, and features for its first act the rock-blues trio Black-Eyed Susan. In the future, Mitchell said, there may be multiple acts in an evening, but for now there’s only one. If you would like your band to be one of those, you can give him a call at 827-3714. “We’re trying for every two weeks,” he said, adding that, if momentum builds, it could be a weekly event. “We’re going to do it up until October,” he said. Thompson said there are additional Saturday Night Live events planned for Aug. 10 and 24. “As you are aware,” she said, “this is a new

event; therefore the activities are limited. We are inviting crafters to set up – also novelty vendors, barbecue vendors, hot dog vendors, etc.” The event will run from 7 p.m. until 11 p.m. And it’s free. As if that weren’t enough, you can spend all day at the GreenJackets stadium at Lake Olmstead listening to some of the hottest bands in Augusta, thanks to Mr. Lokalloudness himself, Stoney Cannon. His band, the Vagabond Missionaries, will be one of the 11 slated to play that day, along with the Vellotones, the Livingroom Legends, Simple Possession, Youth @ Risk, SPYT, Jemani, 420 Outback, Juice, Deviltown, and El Diablo Ninos. But wait! There will be softball! Rockers will square off against the Jocks of 95 Rock, the event sponsors, in the biggest game of the season! Whoo-hoo! “The first 100 through the gate,” promises Stoney, “will get a complimentary Meltdown CD.” So hurry. This much hotness could melt your stereo. And everyone wants a melted stereo. Tickets are $6, with a portion of the proceeds to go to the Augusta Child Advocacy Center. So let’s recap. Saturday Night Live takes place on Saturday night (boy I felt silly typing that), July 27 at the Eighth Street Plaza at Riverwalk Augusta, and will last from 7-11 p.m. Meltdown 2002 will take place on Sunday, July 28, from noon until 9 p.m. at Olmstead Stadium. Admission is $6, and kids under 10 get in free.

BY RHONDA JONES Black-Eyed Susan

420 Outback

Livingroom Legends

Juice

Music By Turner

Not Jeff Dept. For the last year, Beck has been busy in the studio polishing off his next studio album. As evidenced by the new song “The Golden Age” (which is currently being streamed on his Web site), it’s a return to the successful formula found on 1995’s “Mutations.” Beck will debut this new material and some old favorites during his Atlanta show Aug. 20 at the Ferst Center. TicketMaster. Coldplay, the British rockers whose 2000 debut disc, “Parachutes,” was one of the best albums of the year, have announced plans to tour the U.S. Their second release, “A Touch of Blood to the Head,” is due in late August and the band has set a Sept. 14 show at Atlanta’s Masquerade to help promote it. The disc’s first single, “In My Place,” is already receiving airplay on most modern rock stations. Gold Drummer Dept. Anybody who ever drove a Rolls into a swimming pool deserves it. Mike Myers wants to make a film about the life and times of Keith Moon, the late drummer of The Who. Moon was undoubtedly one of the most unique characters ever, with countless

destroyed hotel rooms and wild parties while on tour attesting to his lunacy. Unfortunately, due to the musician’s eccentric behavior, his extraordinary talent on the drums is often overlooked. Moon’s thunderous, heavy-handed style set the bar for Led Zep’s John Bonham, who was influenced greatly by his fellow Brit. Myers is reportedly talking with The Who’s Roger Daltrey about the possibility of the film. Moon died in 1978 of a drug overdose. John P. Kee is bringing his sweet brand of spiritual music to Ft. Gordon’s Barton Field July 27 at 5 p.m. for one of the biggest outdoor gospel music concerts ever held in these parts. Kee is the real deal, a Stellar Award-winning songwriter, producer, musician, and director who is internationally known for his outreach performances. Also on the bill is James Bignon, another major talent known for “What a Mighty God We Serve” and “Miracle.” Joining these two heavyweights are the outstanding choirs from local churches, including Good Shepherd, Faith Outreach, Antioch, Macedonia, Beulah Grove, and Voices of Praise. Bring your lawn chairs, blankets, and lots of water for this free concert sponsored by Faith Gospel Service at Ft. Gordon. Congratulations are in order to Dr. Eugene Beverly and his staff for putting together this top notch concert. Turner’s Rock and Roll Jeopardy: A. At the age of 6, jazz great Wynton Marsalis received his first trumpet from this legendary musician.

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National Science Center's Fort Discovery Presents

June 29 thru Sept. 30, 2002 Fort Discovery's Knox Gallery Open During Regular Operating Hours

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M E T R O S P I R I T

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ncubus is hitting the road once again as their terrific “Morning View” CD and DVD continue to sell in large numbers. Even though the disc was released late last year, its sales have been boosted by an accompanying DVD documenting the sessions and a third single, “Warning.” The California-based band visits Atlanta Oct. 18 at the Hi-Fi Buys Amphitheater. TicketMaster.

Breakfast

BY ED TURNER

The Knox Gallery becomes a virtual playground where visitors can snowboard, play basketball, ice hockey and team volleyball . . . even go rowing . . . without leaving the science center!

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706.821.0200 or 800.325.5445 NationalScienceCenter.org Hours: Mon.-Sat. 10am-5pm / Sun. noon - 5pm $8 Adult • $6 Children / Seniors / Active Military • Members Free

S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

Music: CD Review

“Busted Stuff” by Dave Matthews Band Is a Heavy Little Gem

ake a deep breath before listening to the new Dave Matthews Band CD, “Busted Stuff.” The first song and title track is a leaving-lover song, with lines like, “She floats above me ... She knows she’s going to leave this broken man behind.” Musically, it’s an easy beginning to the disc, with just a hint of tension building, letting you know that something is going to follow. It’s kind of jazzy in spots, and makes me think of some of the stuff Sting has put out over the last few years. Track 2: “Grey Street” is a tear-jerker if you listen right. It’s faster than the first track, punctuated with the sound of crashing cymbals. It’s about a woman wondering, “How did I come to this?” “There’s an emptiness inside here and she’d do anything to fill it in,” he sings. It’s a song of desperation and frustration with no sense of relief. Track 3: “Where Are You Going?” This one’s pretty – soft, with tinkling pianosounds. “I am no Superman. I have no reasons for you,” Matthews sings. “I do know where you go is where I want to be.” There’s some acoustic finger-picking here and the bare hint of the sound of Irish folk music. Track 4: “You Never Know” about some things, but the Dave Matthews Band knows about transitions. This nostalgic track progresses smoothly from the previous track, with more finger-picking. “No one ever stops to talk,” Matthews laments. “What if God shuffled by?” he wonders, before waxing poetic on the idea of “doing nothing” and “breathing just to breathe” and lying on the roof wondering if “someone in the heavens” is looking back on him. Familiar imagery. I wonder why there are no fireflies in the song. “Hey, the moon is chasing me,” he sings. “Walking through the woods, no cares in the world. The world says come and play.” But the whimsical imagery is overshadowed by this warning, which seems to be the crux of the entire album: “Don’t let the trou-

bles in your head steal too much time. You’ll soon be dead.” “All fall down,” he sings, invoking images of both childhood and the plague of a dark age. “Dream little darling, dream.” An absurd juxtaposition. But it works in the hands of such a skilled songwriter. Track 5: “Captain” is a smooth piece about missing someone who has gone. When he declares, “I am the captain of this ship,” one wonders if he is trying to convince the listener or himself. “Day after day, how I long for you, my love,” he croons. Again, he pays homage to childhood: “Won’t you play with me again?” Track 6: “Raven” is an odd title for this one. Its subject matter may be the Earth. The world, at any rate, and the terrible mess the previous generation has made of it. “‘What do you have in your hand?’ says the father to the son,” to which the son replies, “the whole world.” “It’ll take a lifetime, old man, to undo what you’ve done.” When the father asks what would Jesus do, the son says he would, “Shake his finger like an angry mother.” The rest of the song is about “truth” with some existential posturing: “The ground beneath is nothing more than my point of view.” Heavy. Track 7: “Grace Is Gone” delivers a country flavor both in the twang of what sounds like a steel guitar and in the lyrics: “It’s 2 a.m.; I’m drunk again. It’s heavy on my mind.” Another “love-done-gone” song. “Take my eyes; take my heart. I’ll need them no more, if never again they fall on the one I adore. ... One drink to remember; one drink to forget.” Either he’s watched “Lord of the Rings” once too often or he’s been listening to “Hotel California.” Track 8 gives us a break with “Kit Kat Jam,” which is just what the title says. The jam part anyway. It’s jazzy and happy and you won’t be able to keep yourself from smiling.

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Enjoy it while you can. Track 9: “Digging a Ditch” is slow and mournful, and seems to be another song about missing someone. “Digging a ditch where silence lives; digging a ditch for when I’m old. Digging this ditch I’m digging for you.” Track 10: “Big-Eyed Fish” is tense like an old-style fairytale. The fish is “dead, you see” because he decided to leave the water. “Under the sea is where a fish should be.” Then there’s the crazy man who died because he decided to hold his breath. Track 11: “Bartender” is a quick, Irish-flavored piece laced with pennywhistles. “If I go before I’m old, oh brother of mine please don’t forget me,” is his plea, but what he really wants is a shot of immortality.

Niko’s

S N E H AT erna Restaurant & Tav y xpresswa y Jones E 246 Bobb 868-1508

By Rhonda Jones

“Bartender, please fill my glass with the wine you gave Jesus that set him free after three days in the ground.” The album fades out with the whistles and accoustic picking like a traditional Irish lament. And there’s extra stuff. Should this CD make it into your house, flip to the back of the liner notes and follow the instructions for enjoying the extras on your computer. All it will cost you is some marketing information. Dave Matthews wants to know who you are. There is also a second CD – a DVD, called “Some Other Stuff.” You’re on your own with that one. I can tell you, though, that it’s a fun ‘80s orange that will melt your eyeballs if you look at it too long. Enjoy.

Gyro Wrap & Greek Salad $ 25

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M E T R O

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39 M E T R O S P I R I T

Thursday, 25th

Aiken Brewing Co. - DJ Big Iron Saloon - Russell Bonham Coconuts - DJ Coliseum - Karaoke, High-Energy Dance with DJ Hawk Continuum - Playa*Listic Thursday with DJ Casey Cotton Patch - Dennis Hall Coyote’s - Rhes Reeves, Shelley Watkins and the Coyote Ugly Band D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Eagle’s Nest - Richardean Norwood, Michael Johnson, Karaoke Finish Line Cafe - Blind-Draw Fishbowl Lounge - Blind-Draw Dar ts Fraternal Order of Eagles - Bingo Greene Street’s - Men’s National Karaoke Contest Highlander - Smath Sin Dragon Honk y Tonk - Marshall Tucker Band Joe’s Underground - Mike Baideme The Lair - Mike Ritchie Last Call - Ma x from 95 Rock hosts Barroom Olympics, DJ Richie Rich Logan’s Roadhouse - Karaoke with Bill Tolber t Luck y Ladies Bar and Grill - Pool League Marlboro Station - Talent Night Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - House Music Mulligan’s Nitelife - DJ Playground - Open Mic Night Red Lion - Live DJ Rhythm and Blues Exchange - Elliot Holden Group Richard’s Place - DJ Mike the Outlaw, Pool League Robbie’s Sports Bar - Pool and Dar t Leagues Safari Lounge Aiken - Karaoke Salsa’s Bar and Grill - Karaoke with Linda Eubanks Shannon’s - Tony Howard Silver Bullet Lounge - The Big Dogs Snook’s - Open Acoustic Jam Sports Pub and Grill - Spor ts Trivia The Spot - Open Booth Night Squeak y’s Tip-Top - Live Music Wheeler Tavern - Flashback and Company

Friday, 26th

American Legion Post No. 63 - Crossroads Band Back yard Tavern - Karaoke, Horseshoes Big Iron Saloon - Russell Bonham Borders - Jacob Beltz Cafe Du Teau - Buzz Clif ford, Carl Brown Capri Cinema - Behind the Sun, Life Sentence, Fall From Heaven Charlie O’s - Live Music Coconuts - Miss Hawaiian Tropic with DJ Doug Coliseum - Diane Chanel Continuum - In the House Friday with DJ Nick Snow Cotton Patch - E & L Productions Coyote’s - Rhes Reeves, Shelley Watkins and the Coyote Ugly Band Crossroads - Crankshaf t, Needless D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Euchee Creek Sports Bar - Karaoke Finish Line Cafe - DJ Fishbowl Lounge - Karaoke with Linda Eubanks Gordon Club - Flavor Fridays Greene Street’s - Karaoke with DJ Penny

J U L Y

Highlander - Live Music Honk y Tonk - The Duke Boys The Infield Sports Bar & Grill - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - The Clif f Bennet Band Kokopelli’s - Drop Level, Hog Nut The Lair - Tara V. Sheyer Last Call - Dakota West, Tony Howard, DJ Richie Rich Lucky Ladies Bar and Grill - The Niche, Blind Draws Marlboro Station - Show Night with Special Guest Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - DJ R El Rey Mulligan’s Nitelife - DJ Partridge Inn - The C. Anthony Carpenter Project Pat ti’s - Free Pool Private I - Disco Red Lion - Field Day, Filmstar Rhy thm and Blues Exchange - Mo’ Chickin Blues Band Richard’s Place - Midnight Magic Robbie’s Sports Bar - DJ Mykie G Safari Lounge Aiken - Shag Night with DJ Shannon’s - Bar t Bell Silver Bullet Lounge - The Big Dogs Snook’s - Thom Carlton Soul Bar - Disco Hell The Spot - Live DJ Veracruz - Live Music Wheeler Tavern - Flashback and Company

2 5 2 0 0 2

Saturday, 27th

Back yard Tavern - Karaoke Big Iron Saloon - Russell Bonham Borders - Jeremy Carr Cafe Du Teau - Buzz Clif ford, Carl Brown Charlie O’s - Live Music, Military Night Coconuts - DJ Doug Coliseum - Male Revue: Stetson and the Cover Boys Continuum - VIP Bir thday Bash Cot ton Patch - Black-Eyed Susan at River walk Pla za Country Ranch - Karaoke Coyote’s - Rhes Reeves, Shelley Watkins and the Coyote Ugly Band Crossroads - El Dorado Deluxe D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Finish Line Cafe - DJ, Dar t Tournament, Karaoke Fishbowl Lounge - Karaoke with Linda Eubanks, Blind-Draw Dar ts Fraternal Order of Eagles - Crossroads Band Gordon Club - Salsa Night Greene Street’s - Karaoke with DJ Penny Honk y Tonk - The Duke Boys Joe’s Underground - John Kolbeck Kokopelli’s - Drop Level, Special Guest The Lair - Karaoke Last Call - Tony Howard, DJ Luck y Ladies Bar and Grill - The Niche Marlboro Station - Show Night with Special Guest Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - DJ Boriqua Mulligan’s Nitelife - DJ Playground - Barroom Olympics Private I - Disco, Live Jazz and R&B Rae’s Coastal Cafe - Live Music Red Lion - Paul Arrowood Rhy thm and Blues Exchange - Mo’ Chickin Blues Band, Augusta Stallions Af ter-Game Par ty

She’s a little camera-shy, but Tara Scheyer is not afraid to take the stage. She’s doing it twice this week – at The Lair on Friday, July 26 and the Soul Bar on Saturday, July 27.

El Diablo Ninos will be the last band standing Sunday night at Meltdown 2002 which takes place at the GreenJackets Stadium at Lake Olmstead starting at noon.

40 M E T R O

AUGUSTA’S ONLY KARAOKE BAR!

S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

Karaoke

nights 6 a week!

Greene Streets Karaoke Bar

Corner of Greene & 11th Street • 823-2002 Mon-Fri 3pm-3am • Sat 6pm-2am

You’re gonna have a Field Day at the Red Lion Pub on July 26. The Atlanta-based rock quartet will be there promoting their new CD, “Way I See the World.” It’s a nice romp, too, a very enjoyable listen. The lyrics reach in and make you want to hear them, unlike the CDs that make good background noise. Field Day’s publicist compares them to Fuel, Spacehog and early Radiohead. If the CD is any indication, they will give an enthusiastic performance. Richard’s Place - DJ Mike the Outlaw Robbie’s Sports Bar - DJ Mykie G Safari Lounge Aiken - Karaoke Shannon’s - Glenn Beasley Silver Bullet Lounge - The Big Dogs Snook’s - Horseshoe Tournament Soul Bar - Jennifer Net tles Band, Tara V. Sheyer The Spot - Live DJ Squeak y’s Tip-Top - Live Music Time Piecez - ‘80s Night Veracruz - Live Music Wheeler Tavern - Flashback and Company

Sunday, 28th

MONDAY-FRIDAY

HAPPY HOUR 4:00-7:00 pm

$1.00 OFF ALL BEER & MIXED DRINKS

THURSDAY & SUNDAY NIGHTS

LIVE MUSIC WEDNESDAY NIGHT

TRIVIA Starts at 8:00 pm

2800 WASHINGTON ROAD 736-8888

Adams Nightclub - Dance Par t y with DJ Tim Back yard Tavern - Karaoke Cafe Du Teau - Buzz Clif ford and The Last Bohemian Quar tet Capri Cinema - Bloodjinn, Hyde, Unsilent Reign, Closer Than Kin Cotton Patch - Dennis Hall Country Ranch - Pool Tournament Finish Line Cafe - Blind-Draw Fraternal Order of Eagles - Bingo Logan’s Roadhouse - Trivia Marlboro Station - Starlight Cabaret with Claire Storm and Lauren Alexander Mulligan’s Nitelife - DJ Rhy thm and Blues Exchange - Karaoke with Bill Tolber t Robbie’s Sports Bar - DJ Mykie G Shannon’s - Shelley Watkins Somewhere in Augusta - Paul Arrowood

Monday, 29th

Big Iron Saloon - Russell Bonham Coliseum - Q.A.F. Continuum - Monday Madness with DJ Freeman Crossroads - Club Sin Dance Par ty with DJ Tim Elks Lodge - Line Dancing Finish Line Cafe - Open Pool Tournament Fraternal Order of Eagles - Bingo Highlander - Dar t League Honk y Tonk - Blues Monday featuring Robbie Ducey Band and Special Guest Joe’s Underground - Mike Baideme Kokopelli’s - Dar t Teams Luck y Ladies Bar and Grill - Dar ts Michael’s - Karaoke with Hugh Barrow Mulligan’s Nitelife - DJ Red Lion - Karaoke Richard’s Place - Dar ts Robbie’s Sports Bar - DJ Mykie G

Safari Lounge Aiken - Shag Lessons Snook’s - Free Pool

Tuesday, 30th

Adams Nightclub - Karaoke with Bill Tolber t American Legion Post No. 63 - Bingo Big Iron Saloon - Russell Bonham Club Incognito - DJ Richie Rich Coliseum - Tournament Tuesday Crossroads - Club Sin Dance Par t y Docker’s - Pool Tournament D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Elks Lodge - Line Dancing Fraternal Order of Eagles - Bingo French Market Grille West - Wayne Capps Greene Street’s - National Karaoke Contest Joe’s Underground - John Kolbeck Luck y Ladies Bar and Grill - Karaoke Metro Coffeehouse - Irish Music Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Mulligan’s Nitelife - DJ Pat ti’s - Pool Tournament Red Lion - DJ JC Snook’s - Open Acoustic Jam Somewhere in Augusta - Trivia Sports Pub and Grill - Trivia

Wednesday, 31st

Big Iron Saloon - Russell Bonham Capri Cinema - Hatebreed, Stretch Armstrong, Hopesfall, Full-Blown Chaos Coconuts - DJ Coliseum - Talent Search Cotton Patch - Trivia with Mat t Stovall Coyote’s - Rhes Reeves, Shelley Watkins and the Coyote Ugly Band Docker’s - Free Pool D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Finish Line Cafe - Blind-Draw Greene Street’s - National Karaoke Contest Honk y Tonk - The Duke Boys Hooters - Karaoke with Bill Tolber t Joe’s Underground - Keith “Fossill” Gregory Logan’s Roadhouse - Trivia Luck y Ladies Bar and Grill - Pool League Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - Theology on Tap with Danny Craig and Kevin Murrell Mulligan’s Nitelife - DJ Playground - Golf Tournament Rhy thm and Blues Exchange - The Family Trucksters

Richard’s Place - Pool League Robbie’s Sports Bar - DJ Mykie G, Free Pool Shannon’s - Bar t Bell Silver Bullet Lounge - The Big Dogs Snook’s - Open Acoustic Jam Somewhere in Augusta - Pat Blanchard Soul Bar - Live Jazz The Spot - Live DJ TGI Friday’s - Trivia Veracruz - Wayne Capps Wheeler Tavern - Flashback and Company

Upcoming

Newsong’s Summer Jam 2002 - Bell Auditorium - August 3 Charlie Daniels - Aiken Jaycees Fairgrounds October 17

Elsewhere

Bad Company - House of Blues, Myr tle Beach, S.C. - July 25 Dolly Parton - Ear thlink Live, Atlanta - July 25 Wilco - Tabernacle, Atlanta - July 25 Diamond Rio - Alabama Theatre, Myr tle Beach, S.C. - July 25 Vanilla Ice - Jillian’s, Columbia, S.C. - July 27 Stewart and Winfield - The Windjammer, Charleston, S.C. - July 27 Woman - Georgia Theatre, Athens, Ga. - July 27 Ozzfest ‘02 - Hi-Fi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta - July 28 Weezer, The Strokes - Hi-Fi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta - July 29 Bonnie Raitt, Lyle Lovett and His Large Band - Chastain Park, Atlanta - July 30 Jeff Johanasen - Group Therapy, Columbia, S.C. - August 1 Bow Wow - Bi-Lo Center, Greenville, S.C. August 1 Vans Warped Tour - Hi-Fi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta - August 1

David Allen Coe - House of Blues, Myr tle Beach, S.C. - August 1; Senate Park, Columbia, S.C. - August 22 Loretta Lynn - Alabama Theatre, Myr tle Beach, S.C. - August 2 Darius Rucker - Music Farm, Charleston, S.C. August 2 Gin Blossoms, Sponge, 7 Mary 3, Spin Doctors - House of Blues, Myr tle Beach, S.C. August 3 Sonic Youth, Mary Timony - Variet y Playhouse, Atlanta - August 5 2 Skinnee J’s - The Windjammer, Charleston, S.C. - August 5 MTV2 Smokin’ Grooves Tour - Hi-Fi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta - August 7 Tool - Bi-Lo Center, Greenville, S.C. - August 7 Blondie - House of Blues, Myr tle Beach, S.C. August 7 Default, Trik Turner - Roxy, Atlanta - August 7 LL Cool J - The Plex, Charleston, S.C. - August 7; House of Blues, Myr tle Beach, S.C. - August 8 Zao, Unearth, Underoath - Uncle Doctor’s, Columbia, S.C. - August 8 Lenny Kravitz - Hi-Fi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta - August 8 The Breeders - Ear thlink Live, Atlanta - August 9 Jackson Browne, Tom Petty - Hi-Fi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta - August 9 Bill Cosby - Fox Theatre, Atlanta - October 12 Rolling Stones - Turner Field, Atlanta - October 26 Many tickets are available through TicketMaster outlets, by calling 828-7700, or online at w w w.ticketmaster.com. Tickets may also be available through Tix Online by calling 278-4TIX or online at w w w.tixonline.com. Night Life listings are subject to change without notice. Deadline for inclusion in Night Life calendar is Tuesday at 4 p.m. Contact Rhonda Jones by calling 738-1142, fa xing 736-0443 or e-mailing to rhonda_jones@metspirit.com.

Club Directory Adams Nightclub - 738-8811 Aiken Brewing Co. - (803) 502-0707 American Legion Post 63 - 733-9387 The Backyard Tavern - 869-8695 Big Iron Saloon - 774-9020 Bhoomer’s Bar - 364-3854 Borders - 737-6962 Cafe Du Teau - 733-3505 Capri Cinema - Eighth and Ellis Street Charlie O’s - 737-0905 Club Incognito - 836-2469 Coconuts - 738-8133 Coliseum - 733-2603 Continuum - 722-2582 Cot ton Patch - 724-4511 Country Ranch - (803) 867-2388 Coyote’s - 560-9245 Crossroads - 724-1177 Docker’s - (803) 302-1102 D. Timm’s - 774-9500 Eagle’s Nest - 722-5541 Elks Lodge - 855-7162 Euchee Creek Spor ts Bar - 556-9010 Finish Line Cafe - 855-5999 Fishbowl Lounge - 790-6810 Five Pines - 738-3273 Fraternal Order of Eagles - 790-8040 French Market Grille West - 855-5111 Gordon Club - 791-6780 Greene Street’s Lounge - 823-2002 Hangnail Gallery - 722-9899 Highlander - 278-2796 Honky Tonk - 560-0551 Hooters - 736-8454 The Infield - 652-1142 Jerri’s Place - 722-0088 Joe’s Underground - 724-9457

Kokopelli’s - 738-1881 The Lair - 828-5600 Last Call - 738-8730 Logan’s Roadhouse - 738-8088 Lucky Ladies Bar and Grill - 651-0110 Marlboro Station - (803) 644-6485 Metro Coffeehouse - 722-6468 Michael's- 733-2860 Modjeska - 303-9700 Mulligan’s Nitelife - 738-1079 Par tridge Inn - 737-8888 Pat ti’s - 793-9303 Pizza Joint - 774-0037 The Playground - 724-5399 Private I - 793-9944 Rae’s Coastal Cafe - 738-1313 Red Lion Pub - 736-7707 Rhythm and Blues Exchange - 774-9292 Richard’s Place - 793-6330 Robbie’s Spor ts Bar - 738-0866 Safari Lounge Aiken - (803) 641-1100 Salsa’s Bar & Grill - 855-6868 Shannon's - 860-0698 Silver Bullet Lounge - 737-6134 Snook’s - (803) 278-2936 Somewhere In Augusta - 739-0002 The Soul Bar - 724-8880 The Spot - (803) 819-0095 Spor ts Pub and Grill - 432-0448 Squeaky’s Tip-Top - 738-8886 Surrey Tavern - 736-1221 TGI Friday’s - 736-8888 Time Piecez - 828-5888 Treybon - 724-0632 Veracruz - 736-4200 Wheeler Tavern - 868-5220 Whiskey Junction - (803) 649-0794

TARA RETURNS FRIDAY JULY 26TH THURSDAY Mike Ritchie

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Augusta since 1977

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Bobby Jones across from Wal-Mart Owner Rusty Campbell

Saturday Night Live July 27 7:00pm - 11:00pm Eighth Street Plaza Spend the evening where there is fun for the entire family. Lots of food, amusements and entertainment featuring:

“Black-Eyed Susan” one of Augusta’s hottest acts performing blues rock.

Brought to you by The Cotton Patch and Riverwalk Special Events.

41 M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

News

42 M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5

SUN UP

of the

FOR LUNCH

Weird M

• Savannah Rock Shrimp Chowder • Wasabi and Ginger laced Tuna Salad • Buttermilk Skillet Fried Chicken Visit us in Surrey Center Tues-Sat for Lunch & Dinner 437 Highland Ave - Augusta, GA 706.737.6699 - Fax 706.733.8644

2 0 0 2

AUGUSTA REPROGRAPHICS 106 Pleasant Home Road #106 Augusta, Georgia 30907 228-4602

Augusta

REPROGRAPHICS

La Pavillion

Martinez

If You Want To Know What's Really Going On In Metro Augusta You Need

Every Thursday of Your Life

ore news from the front lines: The Jammu and Kashmir State Cable Car Corp. continues to run its gondolas at the mountain resort of Gulmarg (according to a July Washington Post dispatch), passing within 3 miles of the “Line of Control” that separates Indian and Pakistani forces in Kashmir (and despite the gondolas occasionally picking up ground fire); business is down considerably for skiing, hiking and golf, but still, frolickers show up. And according to a June report in Lebanon Daily Star (via The Wall Street Journal), Israeli and Hezbollah forces on the Lebanese border, on stand-down from live ammunition, recently exchanged “fire” with a paint-gun blast, pingpong balls and eggs. • In June, retired British actor Michael Fabian was sentenced to six months in jail for duping an employment agency into sending him 12 actors for a job he had, before leaving town without paying. Fabian had been on trial for harassing a prosecutor and had acted as his own lawyer, presenting a lavish, theatrical defense, for which he thought he needed the inspiration of a good audience, i.e., the 12 actors, sitting in the gallery. (Still, he was convicted.) Too-Busy Parents • Among people who have recently forgotten that they had kids locked up in hot cars (which Centers for Disease Control said has killed at least 27 toddlers since 2000): Tarajee Maynor, age 25 (her two kids died while she kept a three-hour hair salon appointment, Southfield, Mich., June); Jorge Villamar, 59 (left his 16-month-old granddaughter in a sweltering car for an hour and a half, Central Islip, N.Y., July); and two parents who on July 8 had left kids in hot cars in Fort Worth, Texas (fatal to a 6-month-old boy), and Scarborough, Ontario, but whose names had not been released at press time. Best in Show • Simply Dapper, age 6 months, won four prize ribbons at the American Fancy Rat and Mouse Association show in Costa Mesa, Calif., in May. According to a Wall Street Journal report, the rodent’s “shiny beige coat, sweet temperament, and a blood line dating back 12 generations” were the main factors in his success. Contest rats have fancy names (e.g., “Himalayan” rat) but cost only a few dollars to acquire and are genetically the same as ordinary, Dumpster-diving Norwegian rats. • During the same week in February that the Westminster Dog Show opened in New York City, United Arab Emirates held its first-ever beauty contest for camels in Abu Dhabi, with total prize money of about $27,000. And in June, an Interlachen, Fla., farmer named a goat (which he said came from a long line of show goats) Li’l Dale when it was born with a white marking in the shape of a “3” on its brown coat (and which the hundreds of Floridians who flocked to see it thought was surely a divine

sign about the late NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt). (Babe Ruth also wore number 3, but the visitors seemed certain the goat did not refer to him.) Bright Ideas • To deal with the city’s mounting dog litter problem, officials in Anchorage, Alaska, proposed in May to help call recalcitrant dog owners’ attention to the problem by squirting a dab of peanut butter on each pile of dog poop in the parks and on sidewalks. (The idea is that owners would more conscientiously clean up so that their own dogs would not be tempted to try to eat the peanut butter.) • In June, Harvey, Ill., Baptist minister Rev. Roland Gray was sentenced to 4 1/2 years in prison for faking at least 14 auto accidents to defraud insurance companies of more than $450,000; “I consider myself a man of God,” Gray told the judge, “(but) I got a little confused.” Also in June, Mr. Andrea Cabiale, 40, of Turin, Italy, was charged with arranging at least 500 bump-and-stop car accidents involving young female drivers in largely unsuccessful attempts to date them; in Cabiale’s apartment were 2,159 photographs of female car owners and their damaged vehicles. • John Patrick Bradley, 56, and three women were arrested in March in Los Angeles for an ambitious scheme in which recent U.S. immigrants were charged as much as $25,000 for the promise of becoming citizens. The ruse involved an almost full-scale replica of the official immigration service process, including elaborate materials and tests and a swearing-in ceremony, with Bradley dressed as a judge, leading everyone in the Pledge of Allegiance. In the Wrong Place at the Wrong Time • Christopher Watt, 15, who it is believed entered a 9-foot-diameter pipe in the Ottawa, Ontario, sewer system on a dare, was swept deep into the foul waters for five hours on June 10 before rescue crews got to him on an inflatable raft. And a 12-year-old boy, helping his father clean the family’s backyard sewer in Chicago on June 6, got stuck in the muck for several hours until 28 firefighters and 10 paramedics freed him. Least Competent Criminals • Eight-year fugitive John Thomas Boston, 39, who mailed a note in March to Louisville, Ky., police just as he crossed into Canada, informing them that they would never catch him, was arrested in April in Dallas and charged not only as a fugitive but for the first time with three 1994 rapes. Boston’s main error (other than returning to the U.S. from Canada) was to lick the envelope containing the taunting note; his DNA allegedly matched evidence from the rapes. The Classic Middle Name (all-new) • Arrested for murder: Kenneth Wayne Hall Sr. (Gaffney, S.C., March), David Wayne Satterfield (Dallas, March), Shelly Wayne Martin (Baltimore, May), Jason Wayne Petershagen (Alvin, Texas, May), David Wayne Crews (Knoxville, Tenn., June), Mark Wayne Lomax (Houston, April), Jeffrey Wayne Paschall (Draper, Utah, June). Convicted of murder: Mark Wayne Silvers (Anderson, S.C., April), Darren Wayne Campbell (Coquille, Ore., May). Sentenced for murder: Michael Wayne Cole (Goldsboro, N.C., March). Murder conviction overturned and new trial ordered: Michael Wayne Jennings (Contra Costa County, Calif., May). — Chuck Shepherd © United Press Syndicate

Brezsny's

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

Free Will Astrology ARIES (March 21-April 19)

How frequently do I, your level-headed guide, hand you a blank check for instant gratification, a free pass for unlimited partying, and a poetic license to indulge in what might at any other time be an obscene abundance of luxurious sensation? Not often, my dear; not often. I advise you, therefore, not to sit there a minute longer squandering your precious hedonistic opportunities. If this week were a chapter in a book or a song on a CD, it might be called “Wisely Rowdy Playtime.” (But feel free to come up with your own extravagant title.)

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

For the next three weeks, your power symbol will be manna. In the Old Testament it was the delicious food that miraculously materialized to sustain the Israelites as they wandered in the wilderness. The superstars of the New Testament, Jesus and Paul, called it the magical bread of life that provided spiritual nourishment. Updating the concept for your purposes, we’ll define manna as any experience that satisfies your soul’s hunger (though not necessarily your ego’s). I predict that you’ll be able to feast on it in the coming weeks.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20)

In “Why Smart People Can Be So Stupid,” a book edited by Robert J. Sternberg, the stupidity scholar David N. Perkins lists eight common traps for individuals who are usually pretty intelligent. I gently want to bring his catalogue to your attention, Gemini, because you’re in a rare phase when you may be capable of both extraordinary brilliance and embarrassing foolishness. Please be extra vigilant that you don’t fall prey to any of the following missteps: 1. impulsiveness; 2. neglect; 3. procrastination; 4. vacillation; 5. backsliding; 6. indulgence; 7. overdoing; 8. tempting fate. (Thanks to Gavin McNett for his review of the book at www.salon.com.)

CANCER (June 21-July 22)

“Where is your belly cord buried?” According to an ACROSS

editorial at www.indiancountry.com, this is the question Native American elders pose when they want to find out where you belong. Chances are you don’t know what happened to your umbilical cord, Cancerian, so let’s find another way to stimulate your imagination as we probe for the whereabouts of your true home. How about this: On this earth, are there any power spots that provoke shivers down your spine or raise goose bumps on your arms? At this juncture in your astrological cycle, you need to be there — at least in your dreams. Congratulations, Leo. The shrieking gargoyles from the fifth level of hell have decided you’re no longer worth harassing. They’ve headed back to the nasty pit they came from. Similarly, you can disappear your fear about those pious monsters from the garbage dumps of heaven. They’ve also given up on tormenting you. For the foreseeable future, in fact, there’s little likelihood that any more demons, bad guys, or jerks will try to tickle you into hysteria with a vulture feather. You are, as we say in the consciousness industry, free.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

27 Eliminate the

potholes in, say character 31 Chipper 4 Classconscious 34 Spicy dish (–) grps.? 38 James ___ 8 Stops on ___ Garfield 13 Fruity coolers 40 Co. in a big 2001 merger 15 Kind of hour 41 Harbingers 16 Electrician, at times 42 Cast Stallone as a doctor, 17 It dissolves in say (–) H2O 18 Novel ending? 45 Nosh 19 Town in a war 46 Feature of a novel manx cat 20 Muslim 47 Pinch honorific 50 Perched 21 Compensation 52 Go-getter (+) 54 Show elation 23 City in eastern (+) China, onetime 60 Advil target Nationalist headquarters 61 “Middlemarch” novelist 25 Sullivan and O’Neill 62 Arizona snake 26 That, in Tijuana dancers

New York Times Crossword Puzzle

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE O G H A M E V E S S L O E

A L A M O

T A L O N

E N L I S T L V E O I D G O O L A F T A R A L A R E M P E E

R D S

G O F H O T E R I N S H M A F A D R I A E N C T S A A M I E L O

A L E R S

S E A S H O I R K E E S

P O R E O V E R

N I P O P M E A R R S S H S R O I N G S W P O T D A T S O S T T W S E A N

E D I E

S E E R

S O D A

I D O L

E A S E

S T O P

O R B I T

R E E S E

D I R T S

63 Brisk

movement 64 ___ nous 65 Cooker 66 Rig 67 Film board member 68 Rat 69 Not sweet

1 Party offering 2 Truisms 3 Managerial

type 4 “The Godfather, Part II,” e.g. 5 1984 Peace Nobelist 6 Italian province next to Torino 7 Got rid of 8 Peabody or Polk 9 Antics 10 Home of some Kurds 11 Children’s ___ 12 Suffix with sock 14 Smelting waste 22 Hammer part 24 Bandleader Louis 28 Word with roll or bar 29 At ___ (with repercussions) 30 Inventor of the electric battery 31 Popular 1960’s sitcom

You won’t get the ride you want this week — unless you desire it with all your heart. You’ll never receive the answer you yearn to hear unless you’re brave enough to pop a very big question. You simply cannot snag the assignment you crave or the fun you seek or the wealth you’re ready for unless you assert very forcefully how much you deserve it and need it. Luckily, Aquarius, the astrological omens suggest that people are unusually receptive to you right now. Can there be any doubt about what to do next?

Your IQ is already higher than usual, and it’s continuing to rise. Why? Maybe because the arousing planet Mars is joining with the Sun and Mercury to massage your brain chemistry in all the places where it has been stuck. Or perhaps your shrewdness is growing because you’re becoming more aggressive about perceiving the world around you. Another possible explanation is that you’re tapping into a previously dormant reservoir of what astrologer Kat King calls creagousness, or creative courageousness. Whatever the cause, Sagittarius, I suggest you milk the mystery for all it’s worth. Don’t waste time on trivial conquests like polishing off crossword puzzles or acing personality tests in magazines. Try to solve the riddle of the ages, or at least your longest-running personal problem.

27 34

DOWN

I dreamed my horoscope columns were printed on grocery bags in supermarkets all over the world. As a result, teenage boys working as baggers were relentlessly exposed to my counsel. They became enthralled with my secret agenda, which is to galvanize the feminine aspect of the Divine Intelligence. Lo and behold, thousands were inspired to place their raw macho energy in service to the Goddess. Soon hordes of young men had created a militantly peaceful supra-national fighting force called the United Snakes of Gaia, which strove to reverse the mass extinction of species that is raging all around us. And that’s my fantasy of how I saved the world. Come up with your own version, Scorpio. It’s time to rededicate your life to a power beyond your own personal glory.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

If I were your psychotherapist, I’d urge you to talk to me about control and manipulation, about dominance and surrender, about how to transform power struggles into exercises in mutual empowerment. Whereupon maybe you’d blurt out, “No way, man! I’m bone-weary of you always trying to regulate what we discuss. In fact, I’m sick and tired of everyone who tries to move me in the direction they want to go without any regard for where I want to go.” And this, Virgo, would be the exact response I’d have hoped to elicit from you. It would blast away your excessive humility, maybe even purge the compulsive aspects of your desire to be of service. I bet you’d then set out on a quest to claim the authority and command you have forbidden yourself from owning all these years.

1 Dr. Seuss

Like many of his contemporaries, Flemish artist Michael Sweerts (1618-1664) painted elegant portraits of rich and famous people. But he rendered his less glamorous subjects with just as much sympathy and respect. His old women have dignity. His peasants radiate nobility. There are even sparks of humanity in his destitute charity cases. I urge you to make him your role model for now, Capricorn. Give yourself as fully to low-status people as you do to VIPs who can pull strings for you. Expect useful teachings to come from those you’ve ignored or dismissed in the past. And care for the flawed and neglected parts of yourself with as much love as you bestow on your shining beauty.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)

30 36

39 43

41 44

52 57

53 60

Puzzle by David J. Kahn

32 Miller of

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

I hope no one is foolish enough to underestimate you in the coming days. People who interpret your harmonious grace as a sign of weakness will no doubt be flummoxed when they get an up-close look at the iron fist that lies inside your velvet glove. For that matter, everyone you encounter may be amazed both at how multifaceted you are and how skillful you are at expressing all your facets simultaneously. I won’t be surprised at all, of course. As your soul coach, I know for a fact you’re less fragmented and more integrated now than you’ve been in months. In fact, I’d love to see you unveil the whole uncensored truth of who you are: to get out there and be part-saint, part-wild thing, part beauty-worshiper, and part-hard-ass negotiator.

Hollywood 33 “Sounds good to me” 35 One who might crack a mirror 36 Not boldly 37 Sound carrier 38 Bronze ___ 39 Fancy wrap

43 Studying

closely 44 Spiffing (up) 48 Returnee’s cry 49 Kind of license 50 Germ 51 Following 53 Writer Hentoff and others

54 Catcall 55 It runs down

the arm

56 Hand holder 57 Fraternity

letters

58 Rock’s Bon

___

59 Uncap

Answers to clues in this puzzle are available by touch-tone phone: 1-900-420-5656. $1.20 per minute. Annual subscriptions are available for the best of Sunday crosswords from the last 50 years: 1-888-7-ACROSS. Online subscriptions: Today's puzzle and more than 2,000 past puzzles, nytimes.com/diversions ($19.95 a year). Crosswords for young solvers: The Learning Network, nytimes.com/learning/xwords.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)

More and more creative people find they do their best work when they’re happy and well-adjusted. I know writers who no longer need to be drunk or sick or in agony in order to shed the numbness of their daily routine and claim the full powers of their imagination. I have musician friends whose best songs flow not from the depths of twisted alienation but rather from the heights of well-earned bliss. For the recalcitrant throwbacks who are addicted to antiquated cultural habits, there may still be a fine line between madness and genius. But I speak for many when I say it’s time to laugh that motif into oblivion. Please join the revolution, Pisces. You’re ready to embody this sea change in your own personal life. — © Rob Brezsny You Can Call Rob Brezsny, day or night, for your Expanded Weekly Horoscope

1-900-950-7700

$1.99 per minute • 18 & over • Touchtone phone required • C/S 612-373-9785 • www.freewillastrology.com/

43 M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

44 M E T R O S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

’m a 34-year-old guy who’s ready to settle down and start a family, but I can’t even get a date! I don’t think I’d know a woman was interested unless she came out and said so. Because I’m such a dating dunce, it takes enormous effort for me just to ask a woman out to dinner. Ironically, I work mainly with women. In trying to be sensitive to my colleagues’ feelings, I get walked on all the time. This makes approaching women I’m interested in romantically even more daunting. I just try to relax and be myself and hope women will appreciate me for who I am. So far, that’s gotten me nowhere. My buddies tell me it’ll happen when I “least

expect it.” Well, it would be easier to “least expect it” if my dating situation improved a little. Any idea how I might make that happen? —Mr. Nice Guy Your buddies must appreciate what you have to of fer — zero competition with them for the ladies, thanks to your level of mojo, which flops around between that of the Snuggle fabric sof tener bear and a stack of warm towels. It appears that your friends really aren’t your friends (either that, or perhaps it’s time they got in line behind The Scarecrow to see The Wizard about a brain). Real friends are people who are nice enough (and not nice enough) to tell you what you need to know — like, that your front teeth are spor ting spinach falsies, or

my personal favorite: that you just pranced out of the ladies’ room with the back of your evening dress tucked into your nylons. What you need to know is that you aren’t (oh, yawn!) yet another nice guy finishing last. You can spend every moment of your free time donating blood while helping lit tle old ladies across the street from the discomfor t of your gurney, but it won’t change the fact that you’re way too worried about whether people like you. In the workplace, this means that your limp torso probably sees slightly less female foot traf fic than the floor tiles at an ‘N Sync concer t. Af ter work, you stand around, eyes to the sky, waiting for a girlfriend to fall into your arms. While you’re busy ducking bird droppings, the rest of the male universe is out chasing women by the busload. Granted, most of these guys do have something in common with George Clooney, Brad Pit t, and Taye Diggs — being born in Nor th America, for example. Still, some of the most dogged girl-chasers are convinced that they’re suf fering from a lifelong hiring freeze in the charisma depar tment. They could sit around, wallowing like muddy hippos in their apparent lack of magnetism, but they understand something you don’t: Dating’s a numbers game. Ask zero women out, get zero dates. Ask a hundred women out; perhaps one or two will be suf fering from a high enough fever to say yes. Stop waiting for your future wife to notice your potential from across a crowded bar, and stage a seduction like they do in the movies — those starring George Clooney, Brad Pit t and Taye Diggs — not the documentaries about the sexual misadventures of a boiled turnip. Don’t worr y about whether a par ticular woman wants you or not. If you want her, ask her out. If she says no, you probably won’t suf fer

seizures and death (unless you ate some bad clams while asking). Just scrape your flat tened form of f the floor, dust of f any telltale par ticles of humiliation, and move down a stool to examine the woman’s best friend for signs of the flu.

I was bullied while growing up, but I came into my own my senior year of high school, and life’s only gotten better since. Despite that, I don’t want to go to my ten-year reunion alone. There’s no friend I want to take, so my mom suggested I hire a male escort. This mortifies me, but I’d like to have someone there for emotional support in case a bully tries to rattle me. Should I just hire the escort and save myself some worry? —Former Loser I’m uniquely qualified to advise you, because I was a loser as a child. If my junior high school class had taken a vote, I would have lost a popularity contest with a maggot. High school was somewhat dif ferent; namely, because the mean people were taller. Ten years down the road, it’s the bullies who look like maggots. That’s why the last thing you need is some rent-a-boy. I suggest you do what I’m doing — going alone to my upcoming reunion so I can spend the night bonding with all the other losers — the people running the For tune 500 companies that hired all the former cheerleaders and football players to sweep their floors. — © 2002, Amy Alkon

Got A Problem? Write Amy Alkon 171 Pier Ave., Box 280 • Santa Monica, CA 90405 or e-mail AdviceAmy@aol.com

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GENERAL POLICIES: The Metropolitan Spirit reserves the right to reject, revise, alter, or reclassify any classified advertisement. Please check your ad for errors the first week the ad is published. The Metropolitan Spirit is not responsible for any errors which appear after the first week the ad is inserted.

AD PLACEMENT FORM:

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Classifieds

45 M E T R O

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AUGUSTA SCHOOL OF MASSAGE Come meet our staff, view our facilities, and learn about our curriculum. We’ll help you explore the many opportunities available in the field of massage therapy. Remember you can have an exciting new career

in only 6 months.

Business Opportunities SILVER@HOME Sterling silver jewelry company needs reps. for catalog sales Work from home!! 25% Commissions!! 706.738.7387 (7/25#7727) $1500 a month PT - $4600-$7200 FT Work IN HOME International Company needs Supervisors and assistants. Training, Free booklet. www.FreedomFourLife.com (888)221-1931 (7/25#7733)

To Register Call

Mrs. Graham Psychic TELLS ALL Advises on Past, Present & Future

www.metspirit.com Part-Time Help Wanted INCREASE YOUR INCOME! Control Your Hours! Home-based Business! Full training. FREE Booklet. visionadream.com 888-685-8234 (07/25#7732)

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OPEN HOUSE 3512 1/2 Wheeler Road Augusta, GA 30909 Located near Target Shopping Center and the Family Y

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www.mccaugustaga.homestead.com/home.html

Sports MASTERS Cash Paid for Old Masters Badges & Masters Memoriabilia Paying Top Dollar 706-724-5648 or 706-399-5208 or 399-1208 (08/01#7736)

Talk Line VEGAS XXX TALK! Luscious Sin City Girls! ** Live One on One ** CHEAP 66¢ to $1 per minute Choose the Model you want Unrestricted 24 hrs. 18+ 1-702-216-3500 CC/Checks accepted A-10 (11/14#7721)

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L❤ve & Light HEALING CENTER HYPNOSIS WORKS! Stop

Smoking Lose Weight

Get Answers Angel Harp Sessions Reiki Classes 1, 2 & 3

Betty L❤ ve, CHT Reiki Master 2477 Wrightsboro Rd.

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Friday, 7/26 Diane Chanel

Drink Specials: Wed - $7 Wet N' Wild

Saturday, 7/27 Fri & Sat - $9 All You Can Hot Male Strippers Drink Draft Sat - $2 Bud/Bud Light Stetson & The Cover Boys Hot Dog Buffet $2.99 Open Mon-Fri 7pm-3am Sat 7pm-2:30am

Fri & Sat. No Cover Before 10 p.m. 1632 Walton Way • Augusta, GA

706-733-2603

www.ColiseumAugusta.com

Marlboro Station Where the Party Never Stops! EVERY THURSDAY Talent Night $1.00 Beer FRIDAY & SATURDAY Show Night w/ Special Guests SUNDAY NIGHT Starlight Cabaret w/ Claire Storm & Lauren Alexander Wed-Fri 8pm-5am Sat 8pm-3am; Sun 8pm-5am

Travel

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CSRA Swingers Saturday August 10th Couples - $65.00 Single Ladies - $25.00 Single Men - $75.00 Call or Email for event details 706-394-7256 or CSRAswingers@aol.com (07/25#7752)

Lessons

ACOUSTIC

Wheels

NEW LOCATION

Equipment High Quality • Low Prices

July 28, 2-4 p.m.

GUITAR LESSONS Spots Limited ... Available ! Call Now

Second 1/2 Hour Fre e!

Have Guitar, Will Travel! Now Accepting Beginner and Intermediate Students.

BLUES • BLUEGRASS AMERICANA MUSIC

FINGERSTYLE &/OR FLATPICKING TWELVE + YEARS OF EXPERIENCE Studied under guitar greats Jorma Kaukonen of Jefferson Airplane & Hot Tuna and Henry Wynn, renowned local guitar legend

Dead Bodies Wanted

dating is one thing,

enjoying it

is another!

706/829-2676

706/798-9060

W W W.METSPIRIT.COM Yard Sales

Whether your looking for friendship, casual fun or a relationship, you'll

YARD SALE

find what you're looking for in DateMaker Personals!

Sat, July 27 • 8am-until 215 Stephens Rd Off Old Petersburg Rd, Near Baston Rd Clothes, Exercise Equipment, Books, Toys & Much, Much More

Contact Ben Herman (706) 650-0904

(If not in, please leave message)

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Washington Rd Martinez Blvd

Experienced climbers needed We are a fast growing full service tree company that needs climbers experienced in cabling, pruning, take downs, and lightning protection installation. Good salary plus benefits package that include sick days, vacation, paid holidays, Christmas bonus, etc. Call for an interview (706) 854-0926 or email resume to empiretree@hotmail.com (07/25#7759)

We’ll be available Sunday,

THE COLISEUM

Hot High Energy Dance Music And Laser Light Show

Basto n Rd

Employment

Would you like to get your hands on us?

Metropolitan Community Church of Our Redeemer A Christian Church reaching to all: including Gay, Lesbian, and Transgendered Christians. Meeting at 311 Seventh Street, 11 am and 7 pm each Sunday. 722-6454 MCCAugusta@aol.com

Alt. Lifestyles

ns Rd

MOSAIC CLASSES Join the fun, learn the ar t of mosaic! Two-day Workshops. $125.00 Schedule: 7/27 & 7/28; 8/17 & 8/18; 9/14 & 9/15. Call Heather 481-0789. Sign up early, small classes. (07/25#7744)

Religion

Stephe

Art Instruction

Old Pe tersburg Rd

S P I R I T J U L Y 2 5 2 0 0 2

46 M E T R O S P I R I T

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J U L Y

Calls cost $1.99 per min., Must be 18+.

,call 1-866-832-4685

To respond to ads using a

2 0 0 2

CHRISTIAN MAN WANTED SBF, 39, great sense of humor, great listener, desires a mate who possesses similar skills to enjoy various interests such as conversation, walks and Christian activities. Friendship first. ☎564814 SEEKING FRIENDSHIP SBM, mother of two, self-sufficient, 5’1”, 128lbs, seeks trustworthy, romantic SM for casual friendship, dating, possibly more. ☎574955 CHRISTIAN WOMAN Intelligent, sexy SBF, 28, 5’6”, 135lbs, entrepreneur, educated, enjoys fishing, Jesus, dancing, working out, poetry, theater. Seeking SW/BCM, 26-38, for possible LTR. ☎570636 SWEET STRAWBERRY-BLONDE Kind, loving SWF, 28, strawberry-blonde, 5’7”, 196lbs, enjoys dining, movies, traveling, music. Seeking honest, responsible, kind, loving SWM, 28-35. Must like kids. ☎564951 SIMILAR INTERESTS? SWF, 50, enjoys the outdoors. Seeking WM, 51-61, 5’8”+, friendship first, possible LTR. ☎567446 LETS TALK SWF, 58, dark/blue, 135, seeks WM, 55-62, for LTR. ☎552267 GOOD GIRL HUNTING SWF, looks 35, 5’4”, 145lbs, blonde/hazel, seeks tall WM, 32-45, with good morals, that likes to have fun. ☎527072 MAKE MY HEART LAUGH SBF, 22, 5’8”, 155lbs, part-time student, seeks sensual, kind man with a great heart, for movies, dining out, and open-minded conversation. ☎565120 TIME TO HAVE A BLAST Honest SWF, 43, enjoys spending time with my daughter, bowling, dining out, Nascar, movies, baseball games, camping. Seeking honest, genuine SWM, 43-50, for fun and friendship. ☎554752 SEEKS GENTLEMAN SWF, 29, 5’11”, 145lbs, enjoys outdoors, dining, movies, bowling and quiet evenings at home. Seeking honest SM, 29-39, for LTR. ☎550425 FULL FIGURED SWF, 25, enjoys animals, bowling, dining-out, movies. Seeking WM, 20-39, for LTR. No games. ☎559564 MATURE MAN DBF, very spiritual, caring, honest, friendly, intelligent, romantic, physically fit, stable. Seeking BM, 37-45, spiritual, stable, and honest, for LTR. ☎965912 ARE YOU THE ONE? College educated SWF, early 40s, 5’6”, 136lbs, extroverted, enjoys camping, country living, animals, movies, traveling. Seeking same in SWM, 40-50, similar interests. ☎965910 WAITING TO HAPPEN DWF, 45, 5’4”, brown/green, likes sports, music, dining out. Seeking serious, honest, hardworking SWM, 40-55. ☎965902 READY FOR LOVE AGAIN Widowed WF, 45, 5’5”, blonde, 130, marriage minded, no rocking chair for me, let’s go! Seeking SWM, 45-65, that is ready for LTR. ☎569448 LET’S GET TOGETHER SWF, 45, 5’5”, blonde/green, smoker, enjoys dancing, movies, dining out, reading, beach, mountains, up for anything. Seeking SWM, 4049, similar interests. ☎965901 BEING YOURSELF SBF, 27, N/S, 5’6”, 180lbs, brown/brown, openminded, fun-loving, enjoys bowling, poetry, movies, quiet evenings. Seeking strong-minded SBM, 26-39. ☎965916 MUCH MORE!! SWF, 32, 5’3”, full-figured, reddish/brown hair, brown eyes, enjoys swimming, poetry, horseback riding, shooting pool. Seeking secure, respectful SWM, 29-49. ☎965914

GIVE ME A CALL SWF, 50, looking for friendship, possible LTR with SWM, 48-53. ☎965917 SOMEONE JUST FOR ME DWPF, 44, 5’5”, 135lbs, very pretty, ethereal, enjoys gardening, reading, working, animals. Seeking SCM, 40-50, with similar interests. ☎965913 LOVE AND SHARE SWF, 45, N/S, mother of two, dog lover, seeks monogamous WM, 35-60, N/S, for friendship first, possible LTR. ☎566590 THAT GIRL DWF, 39, brown/brown, attractive, financially secure, enjoys travel, loves to be spoiled. Seeking WM, 36-50. ☎965911 WE SHOULD MEET SWF, 30, 5’5”, full-figured, shy, into movies, reading, intelligent conversation, basketball. Seeking SM, 28-39, confident, for friendship. ☎965909 THE TWO OF US Beautiful, romantic SBF, 39, 5’6”, long black hair, enjoys swimming, ballgames, dancing, singing, movies. Seeking outgoing, clever SBM, 40-60. ☎965908 UNDER THE STARS SWF, 52, enjoys fishing, dancing, spending time with grand children. Seeking SWM, 50-58, to spend quality time with. ☎965906 SLIM GUYS ONLY Reserved, shy DWF, 54, 5’, 154lbs, enjoys travel, Murphy, NC area, country music. Seeking tall, slim white country boy, 50+. Call! ☎965905 TAKE MY BREATH AWAY Hard-working WF, 38, 5’4”, 100lbs, brown/ brown, enjoys biking, watersports, cooking, and travel. Seeking WM, 35-50, for possible LTR. ☎965904 WORTH YOUR WHILE Friendly, easygoing, laid-back SWF, 20, 5’5”, 150lbs, brown/blue, loves music, dancing, horseback riding. Seeking SWM, 22-26. ☎965903 @I’M IN CALIFORNIA Caribbean beauty, black, 40, college educated, designer, enjoys fine dining, theatre, classical music. Seeking up-scale WM, 45+, long-distance relationship/maybe more. ☎965900 ISO MILITARY MAN Down-to-earth SF, 39, drug-free, seeks military SM, 28-42, in good shape, knows what he wants in life, for fun and LTR. ☎965899 ALL THIS AND MORE SWF, 33, 5’3”, 125lbs, green-eyed redhead, affectionate, ambitious, student, enjoys travel, sporting events. Seeking SM, 30-43, honest, friendly, intelligent, family-oriented. ☎965897 BE REAL Friendly SHF, 43, N/S, 5’6”, 160lbs, enjoys walks, gardening and more. Seeking sincere SWM, 40-51. No games please. ☎965896 LET’S BE FRIENDS SBF, 21, new in town, 5’8”, 195lbs, enjoys movies, music, long walks and more. Seeking SBM, 20-30, for friendship first. ☎965895 ARE YOU THE ONE? SWF, early 40s, college-educated, 5’6”, 136lbs, extrovert, enjoys camping, country living, animals, movies, traveling. Seeking same in SWM, 40-50, similar interests. ☎965894 STRONG WILL SBF, 45, outgoing, attractive, youthful, enjoys writing, music, traveling. Seeking mature, strongwilled SBM, 35-48, for friendship. ☎965893 CAREER-MINDED SWF, 30, 5’6”, blonde/blue, 135lbs, enjoys golf, tennis, music, outdoors, traveling, dining. Seeking SWPM, 27-36, for friendship. ☎965892 NO GAMES PLEASE Hazel-eyed brunette DWCF, 47, 5’7”, enjoys nature, cooking, movies, reading. Seeking SCM, 47-55, honest, financially secure, friends first, possible LTR. ☎965891 LOVING YOU BF, 25, 5’10”, 170lbs, seeks BM, 25-35, who is honest and trustworthy, for quality time and romance. ☎965890 GIVE ME A CHANCE BF, 55, 5’1”, 145lbs, brown-eyed, friendly, outgoing, enjoys dancing, movies, walks. Seeking SBM, 55-60, who’s easygoing, understanding, friendship first. ☎965885

NEEDING YOU Outgoing, friendly BF, 5’8”, likes dining out, movies, basketball and long walks. Looking for male, 21-31, with similar interests. ☎965889 INTERRACIAL SBF, 23, 5’8”, 140lbs, one daughter. Seeking honest and trustworthy SWM, 23-37, great body, great eyes, good personality. ☎566526 SHARE WITH ME Brown-eyed SBF, 26, 5’, 100lbs, humorous, likes good conversations, 3-D puzzles, movies, reading. Seeking SWM, 21-28, for quality time. ☎965888 GOOD-HEARTED SWF, 44, 5’2”, 145lbs, redhead, green-eyed, humorous, enjoys reading, the outdoors. Seeking SM, 35-52, with similar interests. ☎965887 LET’S CUDDLE WF, 41, 5’6”, 138lbs, brown/hazel, outgoing, likes cooking, fishing, hunting, NASCAR. Seeking SWM, 37-48, for friendship. ☎965886 TREAT ME RIGHT! Outgoing DWF, 37, N/S, has kids, seeks true, honest, stable SWM, 28-48, N/S, for dining, movies, walks, and quiet times. ☎965884 LET’S HAVE FUN BF, 20, 5’6”, 140lbs, friendly, loves having fun, likes movies, dining, bowling, sports. Seeking SWM, 18-36, with similar interests. ☎965883 WOMAN WITH CHARACTER SBF, 40, college, enjoys many interests. Seeking quality times with SM, 38-45. ☎965882 ISO OF A CHALLENGE Attractive BPF, physically fit, petite, enjoys movies, dining out, traveling, shopping. Seeking white collar, WPM, 36-50, 5’9”+. ☎965880 MAKE SOMEONE HAPPY SWF, 5’7”, red hair, green eyes, full-figured, 34, good-looking, clean, sociable, enjoys quiet times, sewing, movies, cooking. Seeking SM, 32-43. ☎965879 NEEDLE IN HAYSTACK BF, 42, 5’6”, long silky black hair, attractive, voluptuous, sociable, educator, enjoys computers, walks, movies, singing, instruments. Seeking serious-minded, fun-loving SM, 40-60. ☎965878

NOT A JOCK 5’11”, 40, brown/blue, 200lbs, handsome, intelligent, business owner, part-time chef, some real estate, enjoys making money, traveling, jazz, rock. Seeking beautiful, broad minded, peace-loving woman, 25-35, no Nascar please. ☎570889

We Purchase Fine Swiss Watches, Estate Jewelry and Diamonds.

Monday-Saturday 10am-9pm 2635 Washington Road | Augusta, Georgia 30904 | 706.738.7777 www.windsorjewelers.net REPUBLIC OF GEORGIA Brown/green, 6’2”, 160lbs, former police officer. I like everybody. Hard-working, nice guy, lots of time off and money to spend. Seeking compatible female, please call me! ☎574304 AUTHOR SWM, 29, 5’11”, 198lbs, published writer, cook, enjoys reading, writing, movies, intelligent conversation. Seeking slender, intelligent, loving WF, 25-33, who likes kids. ☎565627 LAID-BACK SBM, 22, seeks cool, laid-back, open-minded SBF, 20-25, N/S, for friendship and possibly more. ☎571587 A GOOD MAN. SWM, 31, 5’10”, 165lbs, brown/brown, good shape, good job, variety of interests. Seeking down-to-earth SWF, 20-35, friendship first, possible LTR. ☎567940 LIFE IS FUN Sensitive SBM, 44, enjoys bowling and sports. Seeking woman, 25-50, for LTR. ☎553053 HARD WORKING SWM, 51, 5’10”, 198lbs, retired from the military, enjoys travel, tv, movies. Seeking woman, 35-56, for LTR. ☎552587 LET’S MEET Shy SWM, 32, 5’9”, 221lbs, brown hair, enjoys bowling, ballgames. Seeking honest, friendly, caring SWF, 22-40. ☎966028 COUNTRY LIVING SWM, 37, 6’, brown/hazel, 215lbs, likes the outdoors, country music, Nascar, fishing, hunting. Seeking homebody SWF, 28-45. ☎965992 SWEET REWARDS Nubian King, 5’9”, 39, muscular build, loves home, rollercoasters, laughter, fun-loving activities shared with SF, 27-48, substance free, open relationship. ☎965949 FIRST TIME AD Attractive, DWM, 6’, 200lbs, 50’s, kind, affectionate, passionate, giver, educated, financially secure. Seeking slim, attractive S/DWF, 35-50, with same qualities. ☎965947

GREAT SCOTT Retired DWM, 52, 6’4”, 155lbs, reddish/blonde hair, enjoys dancing, seeks similar female. ☎965991 LISTEN UP! WM, 45, 6’, 220lbs, dark blonde hair, outgoing, loves music, animals, outdoors, pleasing person. ☎966005 INTERRACIAL SBM, employed, enjoys chess, basketball, auto mechanics. Seeking WF, 33-55 for possible LTR. ☎965999 GIVE ME A CALL! SBM, 6’1”, 270lbs, seeking SBPF, 35-50, for friendship, movies, walks in the park, and dining out. ☎965993 COMPASSION SM, 53, 6’, 180lbs, musician, loving, communicative, loves bowling, dancing, walks, car racing. Seeking attractive, compassionate SWF, 21-60, for a LTR. ☎965990 LOOKING FOR MY LADY SWM, 35, 6’1”, 195lbs, blond/blue, enjoys cooking, dining, dancing, quiet evenings. Seeking SWF, 25-40, for friendship, possible LTR. ☎965988 WATCH THE SUNRISE SBM, 25, 6’9”, 225lbs, has a wide variety of interests. Seeking outgoing, sweet, caring SF, 20-39, for friendship and possibly more. ☎965987 ROMANCE IS ALIVE DWPM, 56, educated, cultured, seeks WF for LTR and romantic adventure. I’m very athletic, musical, 5’10”, muscular build, good, patient listener. ☎965984 GOING TO THE RACES! SWM, 23, 5’10”, 150lbs, adventurous, smoker, likes the outdoors, sports, racing, dining, wrestling, movies. Seeking outgoing SF, 18-35, for friendship. ☎965977 NEW COMER TO AREA SBM, 42, 5’8”, 160lbs, shy, likes baseball, cooking, country music, kids. Seeking SF, 2450, full-figured, for LTR. ☎965976

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M B D F H C LTR

Male Black Divorced Female Hispanic Christian Long-term Relationship

G W A S J P N/D N/S

Gay White Asian Single Jewish Professional Non-Drinker Non-smoker

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DOCTOR FIX IT GBM, enjoys chess, racquetball, auto mechanic. Seeking WM with similar interests. ☎566315 OUT SPOKEN SWM, 32, 5’11”, 145lbs, enjoys camping, fishing, Nascar. Seeking laid-back WM, 23-35, for LTR. ☎560095

SEEKING MAN OF COLOR GWM, 31, 5’8”, 164lbs, brown/gray, moustache, goatee, down-to-earth, very open-minded, seeks SB/HM, 23+, for friendship, maybe more. ☎575272 GUY SWEET TALK SWM, 6’2”, 240lbs, brown/blue, 52, dating first, possible relationship, enjoys walking, hand holding and talks. Seeking SWM, 30-40, with feelings. ☎966007 LONELY HEART Hard-working, DWF, 41, 5’5”, 234lbs, brown/ blue, enjoys conversation, music, poetry, cuddling. Seeking DWM 38-42, who still dreams of that one true love. ☎563879 YOU NEVER KNOW Fun-loving, easygoing GWM, 51, 5’11”, 200lbs, enjoys cooking, movies, fishing, walking. Seeking interesting GWM, 18-33, who’s full of life. ☎966036 WAITING FOR THE ONE GWM, 18, 6’, 130lbs, blond hair, likes long walks, horseback riding. Seeking GWM, 18-20, with similar interest. ☎966002 BE MY TEDDYBEAR Athletic SBM, 23, college student, enjoys basketball. Seeking heavyset SWM, 35-48. ☎966035 WARM AND LOVING GWM, 18, 5’8”, 145lbs, blue eyes, outgoing, friendly, loves shopping, arts & crafts, photography. Seeking GM, 18-45, for a committed relationship. ☎966034 AWAITING YOUR CALL Outgoing SWM, 38, likes drinking, playing pool. Seeking fun-loving SWM, 25-45, for good times, future commitment. ☎966032 MAKE IT HAPPEN SBM, 32, 5’11”, adventurous, likable, likes drawing, more. Seeking SAM, 18-35, respectful, fun-loving, for LTR. ☎966031 QUIET TIMES Well-built SWM, 48, enjoys hiking, movies, dining out, beach walks. Seeking SWM, 35-40, for intimate relationship. ☎966030 SPECIAL SOMEONE Open-minded GWM, 38, seeks GWM, 30-50, for LTR. ☎966021 WHAT DO YOU WANT? SWM, 31, 5’8”, 175lbs, masculine, muscular, passionate, dedicated, open, enjoys simple things, time with friends. Seeking SWM, 30-45, for LTR. ☎966019 GET TO KNOW ME SBM, 30, N/S, enjoys having a good time. Seeking SBM, 20-40. ☎966018 TRY NEW THINGS SWM, 45, outgoing, sociable, open-minded, enjoys fishing, golfing, reading, quiet times. Seeking SM, 25-45, for friendship, possibly more. ☎966017 GET TOGETHER GHM, 30, 5’6”, 165lbs, extroverted, enjoys sports, movies, walks, cuddling. Seeking outgoing GWM, 25-35, for friendship. ☎966016 MELODY OF LOVE WM, 40, 6’, 185lbs, enjoys sports, swimming, cycling and movies. Seeking WM, 25-50, to spend time with. ☎966015 FRIENDSHIP Or companionship. BM, 26, 5’8”, father, not into playing games, enjoys quiet walks. Seeking male, 21-35. ☎966014 NEW TO TOWN GWM, 31, 5’8”, 175lbs, brown/brown, masculine, country boy, passionate, dedicated, HIV positive. Seeking GWM, 30-45, for LTR. ☎966013 ARE YOU READY? SWM, 42, 5’7”, 160lbs, blue-eyed, athletic, outgoing, enjoys quiet evenings. Seeking SWM, 21-55, adventurous, for casual times. ☎966012 LIVES THE MOMENT GWM, 51, romantic, adventurous, young-looking, 5’10”, 165lbs, likes quiet evenings, movies. Seeking SWM, 35-50, sincere, blond preferably, fit. ☎966011 SIMILAR COMPLEX BPM, 37, enjoys going out, movies, shopping, quiet evenings. Seeking GBM, 35-40, who’s real, down-to-earth, knows what they want. ☎966010 TAKE THAT CHANCE GBM who likes quiet evenings, dining out, movies and stimulating conversations. Seeking SBM, 34-45, for friendship, possibly more. ☎966008

How do you

SOULMATE SEARCHING In shape, physically fit, into fitness; running, SBM, 31, open-minded, attractive, smoker, outgoing. Seeking SM, 21-40, attractive in mind, body and soul. ☎966006 NICE Outgoing, nice SBM, 31, 5’8”, 153lbs, seeks sexy SBM, 25-39, ☎966022 GIVE ME A CALL! Outgoing, friendly GWM, 35, N/S, seeks GM, 21-50, for friendship and fun. He likes movies, cooking, malls, and quiet times. ☎966009 BEYOND SWM, 32, 5’11”, 155lbs, light hair, looking for good time with GM, 18-45, ☎966003 LISTEN UP! 5’9”, 190lbs, short haircut, SBM, 25, nice personality, many interests. Seeking SM, 23-40, friendly, down-to-earth. See where this goes. Call me. ☎966004 MAKE IT HAPPEN BM, 29, 6’1”, 265lbs, generous-hearted trucker, enjoys dancing, singing, long walks, beaches. Seeking open-minded SM, 21-30, for relationship. ☎966001

BEST IS YET TO COME! GWF, 40, seeks GF, 30+, for casual friendship. No stress needed, but willing and ready for what comes my way. ☎965830 FRIENDSHIP FIRST! Funny, smart, down-to-earth GBF, 5’6”, 125lbs, loves long walks, hand holding. Seeking GF, 21-30, who likes kids and doesn’t play games. ☎965829 LET’S GET TOGETHER SF, 24, 5’4”, 185lbs, dark brown hair, likes singing and family-oriented activities. Seeking SBF, 22-33, for friendship, possibly more. ☎965828 GIVE ME A RING Cute SBF, 30-something, seeks attractive SF, 25-45, for friendship, maybe more. No games. ☎965825 WASTE NO TIME GBF, 36, enjoys dining out, cooking, dining out. Seeking attractive, open-minded, fun, nice GF, 25-45, for friendship and possibly more. ☎965823

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WHY NOT? GBF, 24, 5’4”, 145lbs, dark-skinned, short hair, has a wide variety of interests. Seeking GF, 2130, for friendship and conversation. ☎965824 LOOKING FOR A QUEEN SBF, 30, one child, articulate, athletic, sense of humor, enjoys dancing. Seeking SF, 24-35, for conversation, friendship. No head games. ☎965822 YOU DECIDE GBF, 21, 5’7”, 140lbs, enjoys quiet times at home. Seeking fun GBF, 19-28, for conversation and possibly more. ☎965840 SOMETHING DIFFERENT SWF, 41, 5’3”, 115lbs, blue-eyed blond, enjoys casual drinking, movies, dining. Seeking WF, 35-45, with similar interests, for fun, exciting times. ☎965821 KIND AND CARING GBF, 24, 5’2”, 170lbs, blond hair, energetic, loving, enjoys movies, shopping, cooking. Seeking romantic, outgoing GBF, 21-27. ☎965819

1-800-639-0990

or email: metspirit@placepersonal.com

SEEKING FRIENDSHIP Tall, slim, attractive SWF, 34, single mom, enjoys travel. Seeking athletic, easygoing, humorous, fun SWF, 26-45, to go out and have good times. ☎572618 ARE WE POSSIBLE? GBF, 24, seeks GW/HF, 25-35. I’m outgoing, beautiful, intelligent, with a great mind. Hoping to meet a woman with a willingness to enjoy life. ☎566252 ZEST FOR LIFE Articulate, adventurous WF, 32, 5’8”, brown/brown, enjoys animals, running, movies and dining. Looking for WF, 25-40, for friendship. ☎965827 GIVE ME A CALL GBF, 20, down-to-earth, likes dancing, movies, walks in the park. Seeking GF, 21-35, for friendship and conversation. ☎965826 ISO SOMEONE SPECIAL Fun-loving, romantic, sincere SBPF, 25, 5’1”, 170lbs, enjoys shopping, cooking, dining out. Seeking open-minded, romantic, fun-loving SBF, 21-28. ☎965842 SOMETHING SPECIAL Bi-SWF, 41, attractive, kind of shy, smoker. Wants to meet a SWF, 30-45, for special times together. ☎965841 WOULDN’T IT BE NICE? Shy, honest GWF, 40, 5’1”, 128lbs, salt & pepper hair, brown eyes, loves outdoor activities, traveling. Seeking GWF, 30-45. ☎965839 UP FOR GOOD TIMES GBF, 20, 5’3”, 130lbs, friendly, outgoing, loves meeting new people, reading, writing. Seeking outgoing, friendly GBF, 19-25. ☎965838 SEARCHING FOR U! SBF, 18, 5’4”, 132lbs, attractive, reserved, likes reading, music, family times. Seeking outgoing, down-to-earth, funny SBF, 18-45, for friendship. ☎965837 ISO YOU SBF, 25, mother, adventurous, N/S, loves art, poetry, animals. Seeking SBF, 25-35, goal-oriented, for a casual relationship. ☎965836 I’M LOOKING 4 U SBF, 31, 5’3”, fun-loving, nice, caring, honest, enjoys basketball, movies, cuddling and shopping. Seeking trustworthy SBF, 26-35, for friendship. ☎965835 FRIENDS FIRST SBF, 40, 5’3”, 160lbs, laid-back, outgoing, enjoys reading movies, cuddling and dining out. Seeking SBF, 30-55, for friendship first. ☎965834 IT COULD BE SWEET Laid-back SBF, 25, 5’4”, medium-built, into chats, pool, various films, music, books. Seeking caring, understanding SF, N/S. ☎965833 NO ORDINARY LOVE SBF, 27, seeks feminine SF for companionship, dining out, someone who wants something real. No games. ☎965832

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LET’S TALK SWM, 46, N/S, 5’10”, 200lbs, enjoys outdoors, hunting, country music, bowling and flea markets. Seeking SWF, 35-50, hardworking, honest. ☎965975 ENJOY LIFE SWM, 33, 5’11”, 215lbs, brown/green, creative, passionate, enjoys painting, poetry, hiking, traveling, sports. Seeking SWF, 23-45, for casual times. ☎965974 JUST FUN Shy WM, 55, N/S, no kids, enjoys going for coffee, ice cream or a movie. Seeking WF, 45-65, for friendship first. ☎965973 RUN WITH ME SHM, 50, 5’8”, N/S, likes outdoors, having fun, running. Seeking SF, 36-45, for friendship. ☎965972 EVERYTHING’S ALRIGHT Shy SWM, 46, homebody, seeks SWF, 35-42, no kids, easygoing, wants a relationship. ☎965971 CELESTIAL SAILOR Mystical romanticist, rider, believer, gardener, chef, biker, crafts, camper. SWM, 43, very clean, financially secure, seeks SF, 29-50, loves jazz. ☎965970 MR. RIGHT SBM, 41, 5’11”, down-to-earth, enjoys quiet evenings. Seeking slender SBF, 30-45, brown skin, black hair, for friendship, possibly more. ☎965969 MAKE YOUR MOVE Laid-back SBM, 41, 6’1”, clean cut, medium build, enjoys church, dining, beaches, shopping, reading, sports. Seeking soulmate. ☎965968 THAT SPECIAL LADY SWM, 60, easygoing, 5’8”, 160lbs, hardworking, secure. Seeking SCF, 35-55, N/S, for LTR. ☎965967 A LITTLE TLC DWM, 47, hardworking, secure, seeks SWF, 35-46, who wants a LTR. ☎965966 TO THE POINT SWM, 47, 5’10”, 190lbs, outgoing. Seeking attractive SWF, 30-47, for LTR. ☎965965 THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE SBM, 30, 5’11”, medium-built, clean-cut, no children, N/S, N/D, seeks SF, good-hearted, good-natured, down-to-earth, looking for relationship, maybe more. ☎965964 SENSE OF HUMOR SWM, 44, 5’7”, 190lbs, auburn/green, enjoys traveling, scuba diving, water sports, motorcycles. Seeking SWF, 30-45, outgoing redhead. ☎965959 SPECIAL SOMEONE Laid-back, relaxed, easygoing, smiles easily, 6’1”, 175lbs, dark brown hair (highlights), tall, tanned SWM seeks SWF, 18-27, for romantic relationship. ☎965955 WALK MY PIER Blue-eyed WM, 6’1”, retired, no kids, enjoys sailing on yacht, water sports. Seeking similar in lady, 25-35. ☎965953 LISTEN UP Enjoys bowling, plus more. SM, 22, 6’3”, 165lbs, dark brown hair, outgoing, construction worker. Seeking SF, 22-35. ☎965950 WHAT DO YOU LIKE Fun, outgoing SM, 18, blond hair, loves music, movies. Seeking SF, 18-25, for fun, friendship and a possible LTR. ☎965948 LET’S ENJOY LIFE SAM, 23, 5’6”, 150lbs, has a wide variety of interests, Seeking outgoing SF, 18-35, with a good sense of humor. ☎965944 COOL DUDE Crazy, sexy SBM, 26, 5’8”, 155lbs, goodshape, lifts weights, gym, music, cooks, good food and movies. Seeking SF, 18-35, with similar interests. ☎965943

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AUGUSTA 3233 Wrightsboro Road (at North Leg) 1819 Walton Way (Across from Tubman) 3210 Peach Orchard Road (Windsor Square)

737-6444 737-8205 739-5422

NORTH AUGUSTA Edgewood Square

278-6408