The Nerve Magazine - November 2006 by The Nerve Magazine

Volume 7 No.11 Issue #66

November 2006

FREE across Canada

The Nerve November 2006 Page

Vancouver New Music presents

No Neck Blues Band

(NYC)

Friday 10 November 2006

8 pm

Tickets available from the Arts Club Box Office, Ticketmaster (604.280.3311) and at the door

www.newmusic.org

w/ IMP(s) (Victoria)

Granville Island Stage $20/$15

The Nerve November 2006 Page

CONTENTS

L ADYTRON 19

NGELS

THE BL ACK A

CONTENTS

Features

25 DEATH OF A PRESIDENT

TER

JOHNNY WIN

9 JOHNNY WINTER

THE NERVE MAGAZINE 508 - 825 Granville St.,Vancouver, B.C.V6Z 1K9 604.734.1611 www.thenervemagazine.com info@thenervemagazine.com The Don (a/k/a Editor-In-Chief and Publisher) Bradley C. Damsgaard editor@thenervemagazine.com Wiseguy (a/k/a Music Editor) Adrian Mack mack@thenervemagazine.com Shotgun (a/k/a Film Editor) Michael Mann mann@thenervemagazine.com Map and Details (a/k/a Skate Shreditors) D-Rock and Miss Kim Launderer (a/k/a Book Editor) Devon Cody cody@thenervemagazine.com The Henchmen (a/k/a Design & Graphics) Dale De Ruiter, Kristy Sutor Weapons Cleaner (a/k/a Article Editor) Jon Azpiri Surveillance Team (a/k/a Photographers) Devon Cody, Dale De Ruiter, Miss Toby Marie

07 21 22 25 25 27 28 29 29

Sections

Cheap Shotz Live Album Reviews DVD Film Books Video Games Crossword Comics

How a polite British filmmaker finally did what we all dreamed about - Michael Mann

The Muscle (a/k/a Staff Writers) AD MADGRAS, Jason Ainsworth, Cowboy TexAss, Chris Walter, Stephanie Heney, Adam Simpkins, Therese Lanz, Carl Spackler, David Bertrand, Phil Heidenreich, Herman Menervemanana, Ferdy Belland, Dave Von Bentley, Devon Cody, Dale De Ruiter, Derek Bolen, Ethyltron, Johnny Kroll, Andrew Molloy, Boy Howdy, Cameron Gordon, BRock Thiessen, Filmore Mescalito Holmes, Jenna James Plaster Caster (a/k/a Cover Design) Devon Cody Fire Insurance (a/k/a Advertising) Brad Damsgaard advertise@thenervemagazine.com Marketing Manager (a/k/a The Suit) Kristy Sutor The Kid (a/k/a The Intern) INTERNSHIP AVAILABLE (email publisher above) Out-of-town Connections (a/k/a Distro & Street Team) Toronto: Rosina Tassone Montreal: Douglas Ko, Calgary: Mike Taylor Edmonton: Freecloud Records, Bob Prodor Winnipeg: Margo Voncook Whitehorse: Jordi and Jeremy Jones Victoria/Whistler: Jono Jak, Lindsay Seattle/Bellingham: Frank Yahr The Nerve is published monthly by The Nerve Magazine Ltd. The opinions expressed by the writers and artists do not necessarily reflect those of The Nerve Magazine or its editors. The Nerve does not accept responsibility for content in advertisements. The Nerve reserves the right to refuse any advertisement or submission and accepts no responsibility for unsolicited manuscripts or artwork. All content © Copyright The Nerve Magazine 2006. Est. 1999

The whitest bluesman of all says, “Hi.”

- Carl Spackler

13 THE VULCAN FREEDOM FIGHTERS

IT’S JUST A TV SHOW!!! - Dale De Ruiter

15 ESCAPE THE FATE

Epitaph punks can’t figure out the in from the out door - Derek Bolen

11 FAVOURITE SONS

A band from New York that actually doesn’t make us feel violent hatred! - Adam Simpkins

10 11 12 12 18 15 10

Anthology Recordings Roger Dean Young The Goodnight Loving The Night Terrors Marq DeSouza Alternate Action Upper Canadian Blues

The Nerve November 2006 Page

CONTENTS

cheap shotz OUR COVER Spilling His Secrets: The Contents of Bush’s Brain

1 Box cutter: All you need to outmaneuver the most sophisticated and well-funded homeland defense apparatus the world has ever known. 2 Pope Benedict: Well placed puppet in US game of brinkmanship with entire Muslim world. Also, pedophile apologist. 3 Jeff Gannon: Gay hooker and fake journalist, Gannon was first discovered sitting in the White House press room flirting with the President. Secret Service records indicate he was visiting after hours too. Some wags claim he’s Johnny Gosch (see 6), all grown up (he’s not). 4 Pom Poms: The one thing Bush was good at in College. 5 Saddam Hussein: Mel Gibson look-alike. 6 Johnny Gosch: Kidnapped paperboy, allegedly inducted into pedophile sex ring, connected to White House and VP George HW Bush in a 1989 Washington Times headline. 7 Kim Jong Il: Did some business with Don Rumsfeld a few years back. 8 The Holy Bible: Currently replacing US Constitution. 9 Nikola Tesla:Visionary inventor and Man of Peace. It’s a long story, but some people think his ideas had something to do with Hurricane Katrina, and all these headaches I’ve been getting recently. 10 Karla Faye Tucker: Death row inmate who was mocked by then Governor George W Bush of Texas, shortly after her execution. 11 Mahmoud Ahmadinejad: Iranian President and useful idiot in US game of brinkmanship with entire Muslim world. Allegedly one of the kidnappers involved in the Iran hostage crisis in the late ‘70s, and therefore allegedly involved in the fabled October Surprise, brokered by George HW Bush of the CIA, that guaranteed Reagan’s election in 1980. 12 The Satanic Bible: Written by wacky Anton Szandor LaVey of the CIA. Also currently replacing US Constitution. 13 Late Minnesota Senator Paul Wellstone: Dick Cheney to Paul Wellstone, 2002: “If you vote against the war in Iraq, the Bush administration will do whatever is necessary to get you. There will be severe ramifications for you and the state of Minnesota.” Wellstone voted against the resolution. A few weeks later, his plane crashed, killing Wellstone, his staff, wife, and daughter. 14 John F Kennedy Jr: In the book Plausible Denial, Mark Lane presents evidence that George HW Bush of the CIA was a key player in the Bay of Pigs.

Further evidence suggests that Bush Sr. played a role in the assassination of JFK. Less credibly, some researchers have proposed that Bush Jr. took out the son, thereby removing a dangerous opponent to the Bush family crime syndicate, and earning his bones (so to speak). 15 Henry Lee Lucas: Serial killer. The only death row inmate out of more than 150 to receive a pardon by Governor George W Bush of Texas. Claimed to have been a contract killer for the Hand of Death cult, which was allegedly tied to the US military. 16 JonBenet Ramsey: Perhaps the most visible victim of the kind of pedo/porn/orgy/snuff activities routinely engaged in and then covered up by powerful politicians and prominent citizens - aka the “Pedophocracy” - almost always generous donators to the Republican Party. 17 Karl Rove: Godless asshole. 18 Cocaine: George likes cocaine. It makes his brain high, and it makes his family rich. Alternately, that could also be Anthrax, which was stolen from Fort Detrick in Maryland, and then conveniently mailed to certain individuals in the run-up to the Patriot Act of 2001. 19 Coffin: Inside of which Skull & Bonesmen such as George W Bush are said to enjoy the odd evening of ritual homosexual buggery. 20 Reverend Sun Myung Moon: Fascist cult leader, CIA asset, owner of both UPI and the Washington Times, drug trafficker, arms trader, South American land baron, blackmailer, Washington power broker, self-proclaimed Messiah, friend and business partner to the Bush family, and now the proud owner of the world’s largest source of fresh water, the Guarani aquifer. Drink up, folks! Four News Items from the Last Month The Detroit Cobras were forced to cancel all the Canadian dates on their current tour after being stopped at the border, prior to their October 11th appearance in Winnipeg, due to “unforeseen issues” according to the Bloodshot Records website. 2) Shortly after that, Abbotsford’s You Say Party! We Say Die! was turned around by US Customs Agents at the Peace Arch, forcing the band to scrap eight dates on its North American Tour, after the band failed to submit the correct paperwork. Interestingly enough, nobody in the YSPWSD camp was aware of changes in procedure meaning that, had they crossed the border a week earlier, US officials would have been forced to come up with an entirely different excuse

to fuck with a completely harmless group of musicians. 3) On October 9th, North Korea successfully detonated a nuclear device, earning the condemnation of the entire Western world. North Korea initially purchased two light water nuclear reactors from the engineering firm ABB in the year 2000, at a cost of two million dollars, while future US Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld sat on ABB’s board of directors. As of publication, Donald Rumsfeld is still permitted to cross the border. 4) On October 22nd, Buffalo, New York schoolteacher Malcolm Watson began his sentence after being convicted of child sex abuse. His punishment? He was sent to St. Catherines, Ontario. Watson’s wife is Canadian, so he was given the choice by Cheektowaga, New York Judge Thomas Kolbert: either move to Canada or go to jail in New York state. Watson encountered no problems while crossing the border. Lest We Forget! Anti-War Remembrance Day at the Cobalt everyone’s favorite Main Street rock vault will host a special evening of half-hour sets from some of Vancouver’s best bands (Hezzakya, Swanvista, A Ghost To Kill Again, the Orchid Highway, the Belushis, and one of its worst, Mr. Plow, plus more), all of whom are gathered together to pay their respects to the Canadians who’ve served (and fallen) in both World Wars, Korea, UN Peacekeeping missions, and Afghanistan... with no respects whatsoever paid to the asshole politicians in Ottawa who keep sending the wrong Canadians time and again to endure (or die for) vague un-reasons in hellish shitholes named Ypres, Passchendaele, Dieppe, Ortona, Suez, Banja Luka, Kosovo, and Kandahar. The Anti-War Remembrance Day happens Saturday November 11th.

Clouds: the gay bricks Special Sufjan Stevens Review St. Andrew’s Wesley Church,Vancouver, BC Saturday, October 14th, 2006 The doors were late opening and it took some people two hours to get in. I of course pushed my way to the front and walked right in. No one said anything cuz Sufjan Stevens fans are a bunch of pussy pussy fag fags. I’m sure there were a few angry Livejournal entries about the big bad line jumper the next day but I can live with that. This show was seated general admission at the church on Burrard. Seated general admission concerts are stupid and dangerous. If Sufjan fans had an ounce of testosterone this place would have got fucking wrecked. Also, if Sufjan fans had an ounce of business sense, they would have counterfeited the shit out of this show as tickets were going for three times face value on Craigslist. The door was manned by an old church lady and a stupid hipster chick who was sneaking all her friends in for free. I doubt either of them were

gonna be much help if the shit hit the fan. We took our seats in the first row. They weren’t serving any booze but that’s okay cuz I had my flask with me so we sat there drinking. Some girl told me the seats we were in were reserved. I told her I didn’t understand how you could reserve seats in a general admission show and then threatened to punch her in ear if she didn’t fuck off, so she did. It took me about 30 minutes to realize that Sufjan was on stage. All I saw was some silly faggot in a butterfly costume playing orchestral Christian bluegrass music. Boring as shit. Sufjan Stevens? More like Fagjan Stevens. Twelve hundred rubes walked out of the church raving about what a magical evening it was. What show were they at? The only thing magical about Sufjan Stevens is how this pussy survived growing up in Detroit. If I was a black man from Detroit, the white homo playing the banjo would pretty high on my ass kicking list. - anonymously submitted

WHOGIVES

AFUCK

Bricks: the tough clouds This month’s guest: Guy Kozowyk, of deathcore champs Red Chord What album is currently in your Stereo? This tour, I took the Engineer/Achilles split, Muse - Black Holes & Revelations and Quicksand - Manic Compression. What book are you currently reading or have most recently read? I get car sick, unfortunately, so I don’t get to read much on tour. I’ve tried to start reading this Neil Gaiman book (I can’t remember what it’s called, but he’s the author of Sandman) for the past six months. Fingers crossed, this will be the tour I get motivated enough to see it through. What was the last movie you watched? I watched some brutal Tony Ja (the crazy Muy Thai fighter guy from Ong Bak) movie at our friend Paul Romano’s house a couple weeks ago. Name one album, movie or book you consistently recommend to friends. The Boxcar Children. Name one album, movie or book you would recommend to an enemy? How Many Bugs in a Box by David A. Carter. I celebrate his entire catalogue. What is a recent guilty pleasure? Tons of rap music and I really don’t feel guilty about it. What is your biggest pet peeve? People borrowing my pen or keys. Name one bad habit you are extremely proud of? If I was proud of it, it wouldn’t be a bad habit. If you could hang out with any one person throughout history who would it be? You. What is one thing you want to get done before you die? I’ve always wanted to run the Boston Marathon. It’s impossible to set aside that much time every day to train, unfortunately, so I’ll probably die without ever completing the task. I cry. Red Chord plays at the Fenix, Seattle, Nov 8, and the Commodore,Vancouver, Nov 9 n

The Nerve September 2006 Page

NOVEMBER 14

NOVEMBER 16

DOORS 8:00PM SHOW 9:00PM

TICKETS ALSO AT SCRAPE

COMMODORE BALLROOM

NOVEMBER 20

ALL AGES

TICKETS ALSO AT SCRATCH AND SCRAPE

THE RED ROOM

NOVEMBER 30

DECEMBER 3

TICKETS PURCHASED FOR THE OCTOBER 2ND SHOW WILL BE HONOURED AT THE DOOR TICKETS ALSO AT ZULU

CROATIAN CULTURAL CENTRE

NOVEMBER 29

ORPHEUM THEATRE

RICHARD’S ON RICHARDS

DECEMBER 20

QUEEN ELIZABETH THEATRE TICKETS ALSO AT SCRAPE AND HIGHLIFE

NOVEMBER 10

LADY SOVEREIGN COMMODORE BALLROOM

NOVEMBER 16

RAY LAMONTAGNE THE CENTRE FOR PERFORMING ARTS

The Nerve November 2006 Page

NOVEMBER 18

DAN BERN THE RED ROOM

NOVEMBER 17

MACEO PARKER COMMODORE BALLROOM

WITH GUESTS

BORN RUFFIANS

TICKETS ALSO AT ZULU AND SCRATCH

RICHARD’S ON RICHARDS

JANUARY 18 SAVE ON FOODS MEMORIAL CENTRE VICTORIA VICTORIA JANUARY 19 PACIFIC COLISEUM VANCOUVER VANCOUVER JANUARY 21 PROSPERA PLACE KELOWNA KELOWNA JANUARY 23 ENMAX CENTRE LETHBRIDGE LETHBRIDGE JANUARY 24 PENGROWTH SADDLEDOME CALGARY CALGARY JANUARY 25 REXALL PLACE EDMONTON EDMONTON JANUARY 27 CREDIT UNION CENTRE SASKATOON SASKATOON JANUARY 29 MTS CENTRE WINNIPEG WINNIPEG TICKETS AVAILABLE AT ALL THE USUAL OUTLETS

BILLY TALENT SUPPORTS

NOVEMBER 18

LINDSEY BUCKINGHAM

THE CENTRE FOR PERFORMING ARTS

DECEMBER 2

PANIC! AT THE DISCO PACIFIC COLISEUM

CONTENTS

Off Again, On Again By Derek Bolen

can imagine fewer things shittier than being in a band one week away from releasing your Epitaph debut when all of a sudden, out of the blue, the lead singer quits. Tragically, such a fate had befallen ironically-named Las Vegas post-hardcore quartet Escape The Fate when this interview with drummer Robert Ortiz took place. Interestingly enough, now that I’ve finally gotten around to transcribing this interview two weeks later, the band seems to have reconciled with lead singer Ronnie Radke and is currently touring in support of its album, Dying is Your Latest Fashion. Which kind of makes this interview a dated, useless piece of shit. Thanks for nothing, Escape the Fate. Nerve: I imagine it’s a pretty hectic time for you guys right now? Yeah dude, definitely. The album’s getting ready to come out, and everything that’s going on…it’s kind of messed. Nerve: So your lead singer recently left the band? We had to part ways with him, unfortunately. We’re not saying a whole lot about it right now… it’s pretty personal. I can’t elaborate on it. It’s just stuff we don’t want to talk about right now. Nerve: Okay. Are you guys auditioning replacement singers right now? Yeah, dude. We’ve had people flying from all over the country. We had a link on our Myspace where people could submit their mp3s and YouTube videos, and we’ve had to spend hours sifting through it. There’s a lot of bad stuff, but I’ve heard 50 or so demos so far and we’ve called a few people to have them fly out and try out. We’ve definitely have had some interesting ones, and we’ve got some guys in mind, but Ronnie’s definitely not the easiest guy to replace. We’re pretty optimistic, though. We feel we’ve got a lot to look forward to, and hopefully we can find someone else and start doing this again. We know it’ll never be the same, but we hope we can create something that’s better. Nerve: When’s the new record out? Next Tuesday. We’re pretty excited. For our EP we

Smokin in the lady boys room maybe sold about 500 through Best Buy, and a few more through stores here in Vegas who ordered a bunch because they knew we had a pretty good local following. This time around, Hot Topic’s ordered about 5000 copies, and Best Buy ordered a ton more, so it’s looking like we’re going to have a good first week. Nerve: I imagine the departure of your lead singer isn’t hurting in the publicity department, either. Yeah, definitely. Our Myspace is blowing up right now with the album about to drop. Just from our Myspace alone, we can see we’re getting 30,000 plays a day where we used to get 10,000 on a REALLY good day. So it is creating some publicity. At least we got that

much out of it. Nerve: How has it been working with Epitaph since you signed with them? It’s great, man. They’ve done nothing but support us. Even through this thing we’re going through right

Nerve: Should we plan on seeing Rockstar: Escape The Fate any time soon? Oh my God, we’ve been talking about that! That’s the first thing I said: I heard a commercial or something, and I called our manager right away and said we needed to get Rockstar: Escape The Fate. He actually thought it was a good idea. We totally would do it, but it would probably take months and months of planning. I hope those guys end up not being shitty, because I’ve been wanting to see Jason Newsted in something for years. Nerve: That makes one of us. Anything you’d like to add in closing? Yeah, go buy the record. n

I called our manager right away and said we needed to get Rockstar: Escape The Fate. He actually thought it was a good idea. now, they came to us and said, “We support you guys and we’ll help you any way that we can,” and that’s all they’ve ever done. Anything we’ve asked for, they’ve given to us, and they believe so strongly in this record and they’re behind us 100 percent.

Johnny Winter Well… Still Alive and,

he fucked all their girlfriends, once they had all seen him playing in the local bars and jook joints. A Rolling Stone article about the Texas music scene started a bidding war, and in 1969 he released his first in a long series off killer records - great big gobs of greasy, grimy, slobberin’ hunks of righteous wax, a cosmic party that shimmies, boogies and choogles, and still continues to reverberate massively thru the years. Don’t miss out yer chance to see the one and only Johnny Winter! Amen brother!

This picture is kinda freaking me out

By Carl Spackler

ohnny Winter - the name alone brings a demented smile to my beery face. The man walks tall in the bunker. The music is pure Texas; loud, lean, dry az a bone. Roadhouse music. Amplified blues rock. The kind that oil rig workers, ranch hands, cattle barons, and Chicken Ranch gurls need on a hot Saturday night! In anyone else’s hands these days, this style of music turns into Blues Hammer,

but Johnny is a force of nature, as wild and free as a Texas Tornado (R.I.P. Freddy, we’ll miss you amigo!) Johnny was born on Feb 23, 1944 in Beaumont Texas, where the town motto is “Eat the weak and use their bones for Xmas decorations”. Born an albino, with very limited vision, he must have stood out like a snowman in Hell. But Johnny not only avoided being eaten alive by the drunken jockocracy,

Nerve:Your music seems to blend so many styles - where do you think that comes from? Learning from so many different blues players. Robert Johnson, Jimmy Reed, T-bone, Muddy Waters and many others. Nerve: Growing up, did you listen to Mexican radio? No. Ha ha. Mostly rock and blues stations like KJET in Texas with Clarence Garlow spinning the blues. Nerve:Your album Still Alive and Well is a stone classic - do you still perform anything from it? No my set is mostly blues except for “Highway 61” which is bluesy. Nerve: Would you consider playing “All Tore Down” when you appear at the Yale? That’s actually part of my current set. Along with songs from my latest recording on Virgin/EMI.

Nerve:You’ve been honoured with many awards and nominations thru the years. Which one has been the most special? My Grammys for working with Muddy. Nerve: Do you see much of your brother or Rick Derringer these days? Yes as a matter of fact we just put on a very successful reunion show a few months ago on the East Coast. Nerve: Any plans to tour together in the future? Yes, definitely. Now more than ever. Nerve: Why did you leave Texas? New York was where my manager and my record label resided at the time so it was easier being there. Nerve:Tell me the best Muddy Waters story you remember. None really except for the fact that is was a high point in my career working with him. Nerve: Anybody else you would have liked to produce? I’ve worked with Sonny Terry and John Lee Hooker I pretty much concentrate on producing my own stuff nowadays. Nerve:Your last album I’m a Bluesman is awesome - what’s next? Thank you. More records and more blues, which is what I love doing. Johnny Winter plays at the Yale, Vancouver, November 7 n

The Nerve November 2006 Page

CONTENTS

Upper Canadian Blues

Music notes from in, out and around Toronto, ON By Cameron Gordon

Oi head... Pants NOW!

ext time you’re mumbling to yourself “Herni Faberge wants… Henri Faberge wants… Henri Faberge wants his MTV” to the tune of Dire Straits’ “Money for Nothing”, take heart in the fact that the feeling is now mutual. The local love rocker and his oh-so-cutesy backing band the Adorables recently made a live-to-air appearance on MTV Canada, much to the surprise/delight of the Toronto indie rock community. Heady stuff that the crew will look to replicate live with some dates in western Canada this November. Check the Internet for details… Faberge friends Born Ruffians have also been making some headway recently. The band has inked a nifty North American recording contract with Warp Records, the same label that brings us the assorted bloops and bleeps of electronic acts Aphex Twin, Boards of Canada and Squarepusher. Odd fit there, considering that it’s doubtful that the Ruffians’ garage rock has ever met a sequencer. However, given Toronto’s interminable erection for any and all things British, the UK label should at least serve to boost the band’s street cred a few notches. The band’s self-titled debut EP is available now… It’s been over a year now since the Constantines released the wicked-bad long player Tournament of Hearts. In that disc’s considerable wake, a pair of the Cons’ key players have responded in kind by enrolling in one-man bands. Woolly Leaves (keyboardist Wil Kidman) and Baby Eagle (guitarist Steve Lambke) have each put out albums

on Toronto’s Outside Music. While both these acts are days away from the Constantines’ choppy mulch, they’re both kinda cool in their own way and ideal for curling up on your sofa with a blankie, a cup of warm cocoa and the latest issue of The Nerve - an ideal late-autumn activity… Another new release this month comes from local roots rockers Canteen Knockout and their new self-titled CD. Frontman Andre Skinner recently moved to the backwoods outside of Toronto in search of critters and artistic solace but you can still see Andre on the last Saturday of every month at the Gladstone, playing solo country tunes in the late afternoon (hey, that almost rhymes)…. And finally, a few words about Colin Brunton and his new Toronto punk retrospective film, The Last Pogo Jumps Back: Cha Cha Cha. The producer has set forth revisiting many of the central characters that outfitted his 1978 concert film The Last Pogo, detailing the end of the original punk movement in Toronto. Thus far, Brunton has touched base with members of the Viletones, the Battered Wives, the Mods, Tom Wilson from Junkhouse, Don Pyle from Shadowy Men on a Shadowy Planet and many, many others. Here’s hoping this project comes to pass as this is obviously a feast-of-fancy for Brunton, and this kind of stuff deserves to be documented for eternity and beyond. Keep track of Brunton’s progress at the film’s official website, www.thelastpogo.net. n

Anthology Recordings Living In An Immaterial World

By Filmore Mescalito Holmes

n a world where the four biggest labels release 80% of music, only around 20% of all music ever recorded is legally available for purchase. Sony BMG, Universal, Warner, and EMI may hold the keys to the biggest vaults, but they’ve acted totally ignorant of the potential behind that for years, especially online. Having spent the better part of a decade doing everything in their power to kill MP3s instead of embracing the new technology, the four dinosaurs have left open a very lucrative niche online for the brave few. Till now, the digital market has only been slightly picked at by sites offering mostly mainstream releases and poorer quality versions of well-established albums and by DJ friendly venues. Now that lapse is about to be truly exploited. As of October 5th, Keith Abrahamsson’s Anthology Recordings became the first all digital reissue label. Anthology is focusing on rare, out of print, and unreleased records, meaning that GEMM and eBay sellers will be taking a hit on this one. But those guys have had us music nerds by the balls for years, and payback’s a bitch, ain’t it? By resurrecting forgotten titles in a cost effective manner, Abrahamsson’s little project may just change the musical landscape. As is always the case, the quality of the tunes on parade

will determine the outcome. If it’s all crap, no one will notice and iTunes will run off to raise its prices unchallenged. So, to this end, the first run of reissues consists of the following titles. African Head Charge – Off The Beaten Track (1986) While Eddie Grant was busy watering down reggae for the mainstream, Bonjo Iyabinghi Noah walked a different path. Rearranging samples with developed electronic sounds, this was one of the first dub downtempo albums of its kind. Almost every chill producer out there owes these guys a pack of smokes. Of course, this is 20 years old now, so it’s a little dated, but all the more impressive when you think about it. China Shop – 21 Puffs On The Cassette (19791990) China Shop was an unproductive New York post-punk band that at one time featured Sonic Youth drummer Richard Edson. In a decade of local gigging, they only managed to record one EP, which is included here alongside pretty much everything else the band ever recorded. I honestly can’t be sure which tracks come from the EP and which were merely bootlegged in an airplane hangar. It all sounds

like a demo greatest hits, which I suppose stays true to China Shop’s punk roots. Passion and open-mindedness always destroys shit-eating grins and radio friendly talent, and so this band is everything Franz Ferdinand will never be… still, that isn’t really saying much. Moondog – Demos (1989) This is 15 minutes worth of post-hardcore Walter Schreifels recorded after Gorilla Biscuits with the band that would become Quicksand. These sevenodd demos were recorded in one session, and, from the sound of it, mastered at the same time. Walter’s lyrics were there, though, as well as a certain intangible chemistry between him and his new and future bandmates, so there might be appeal beyond fans looking for a piece of Schreifels’ historical legacy. My Solid Ground – Self-Titled (1971) This project was the brainchild of Germany’s Bernhard Rendel. MSG released only one album, then fizzled out in the midst of constant lineup changes before a second could be pressed. That is a real shame because this self-titled work is a true psychedelic, Krautrock, space rock, classic rock classic, and no hyperbole. It’s comparable to anything Pink Floyd or Black Sabbath were doing at the time: Sabbath in terms of righteousness and Floyd in terms of their vision. Lord only knows what MSG could have become if they’d stuck with it, ‘cause it was already dope as hell. Pärson Sound – Self-Titled (1966-1969) When anyone thinks of Swedish music, they usually think ABBA. This two album mix of studio and live cuts from late ‘60s psychedelic metal/post-folk jam band Pärson Sound will prove that to be a gross

oversight on behalf of the world. With the average track length well over 10 minutes, each song renders several mood and noise changes care of fuzz bomb riffs, mangled sax, and a glorious electric cello. Like many jam bands, Pärson Sound can occasionally go a little too far in the self-indulgent noise department, but when it comes together, it comes together quite well. Sainte Anthony’s Fyre – Self-Titled (1970) The recording quality is a little questionable for this one, coming off a little muffled at times. The record pops do add a certain charm, though, and the dense blues-rock distortion produced by this New Jersey power trio takes as many razorblades to amps as its MC5/Mountain contemporaries, so it’s not that detracting. Wolfmother is decent, but doesn’t touch the sludgy swagger of these guys. This is what they were trying for and missed. It’s heavy shit. The Suicide Commandos – The Commandos Commit Suicide Dance Concert (1978) This timely punk threesome has its footnote in history by wedging the Minneapolis doors open for the likes of Husker Du and the Replacements. Despite only releasing one studio and one live LP, their influence in the area cannot be argued. Their skill, however, is still up for debate. They ain’t exactly the Ramones, as evidenced by covers of the Animals’ “It’s My Life” and, which is more indicative, Love’s “My Little Red Book.” Then again, punk was never about musical virtuosity anyway. Their stage presence comes across well in this reissue of the live album and the original compositions are as solid as late ‘70s punk gets. n

C l fi

w w i a

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CONTENTS

Favourite Sons

Soon to be Your Favourite! By Adam Simpkins

wo guys walk into a New York City pub. Sullen, Irish barkeep asks, “What’ll it be, gents?” The taller of the two replies, “You… in our band.” While not exactly the richest zinger you may have heard, that’s pretty much how the former members of the nouveau-psychedelic/electronic Aspera ended up working with then-bartender Ken Griffin – previous Rollerskate Skinny frontman and current driving force behind Brooklyn’s Favourite Sons. This past September, the band released its debut album Down Beside Your Beauty on Vice Records, one likely to appear on a number of critics and fans bestof lists at the year’s end. An emotionally driven album, it was born out of Griffin’s clashing states of love and despair, with the kind of honest, unadulterated passion that many current bands seem to lack. On the phone from Philadelphia, just hours before the band starts its three-week North American tour, Favourite Sons guitarist Justin Tripp explains the new direction for the musicians: “We wanted a more stripped down sound and work around simpler songs and Ken’s voice.” While this wouldn’t normally be a startling revelation, it’s worth noting considering the band members’ pedigrees. Aspera experimented with a handful of disparate

styles, eventually allowing itself to be loosely pegged somewhere between the Faint and the Flaming Lips, while Rollerskate Skinny were one of the finer, yet shamefully unsung bands of the early ‘90s British shoegaze scene. But as Tripp contests, the Favourite Sons had no desire to return to those headier days. “We wanted [Down Beside Your Beauty] to be upfront and understandable. We wanted the listener to be able to hear what we were saying lyrically and let Ken’s voice be the focus, while not being overly involved in sound and worrying about having perfect recordings.” And few would argue against this approach: Griffin indeed has been graced with sturdy Irish pipes. Reminiscent of Nick Cave or a less theatrical Jeff Buckley, he has perfected his craft and at no time on the album does his voice seem strained or insincere; when Griffin sings, you can’t escape it. And the backup players aren’t anything to scoff at either. Tripp, alongside with Matt Werth (bass), Carmine DeGennaro (guitar), and A.J. Edmiston (drums) all play an integral part to their bandleader’s vision. Though Griffin pens the lyrics and writes all of the songs, the band still retains a well-balanced, democratic approach to its songwriting. “If someone is uncomfortable with something, we’ll change it,” says Tripp, “it’s not like Ken’s some

With the exception of the Hold Steady, it’s rare to uncover New York bands that work from the heart

Ken Griffin in enigmatic frontman pose sort of tyrant.” The varied sonics of the Favourite Sons, their approach to songwriting and place in “the scene” at large is, well, kind of refreshing. With the exception of the Hold Steady, it’s rare to uncover New York bands that work from the heart; instead, they’re often diddling around campfires and spitting flow like the second-coming of Jim Morrison’s An American Prayer. Tripp concurs that things aren’t any better in Britain, where the band just finished a handful of shows opening for the Dears. Although not as flaky or spurious, the trends in the UK music scene are equally as questionable. “It’s so hard to associate with any of these people. The bands and the blog

scene over there is so consumer based,” he says, “There are all these Clash inspired, Libertines-styled bands that disappear after their one hit single… it’s just a nightmare over there.” Although not likely to quickly top the Billboard Hot 100, Favourite Sons are sure to quickly win over those who fall into their path. According to Tripp, the band has already written half of the songs that will make up their next album, and after a few more solid months of touring they’ll return to the studio to record again. So while things are certainly looking up, don’t expect this lot to rest on its laurels. Favourite Sons appear at the Media Club on November 11th with The Drones and Devastion n

The Nitty Gritty Dirt Man

that have a real feel for what’s happening. The other big trick is that they have to have a really acute ear to the rest of the players, not just in the sense of the mathematics of the music but the spirit of the music and where we are heading.” An occasional coppersmith and former full time teacher,Young has managed to balance these occupations whilst also earning great critical acclaim and completing some very successful tours of Britain.

Having been raised in the dirt, that’s what I relate to

s t

“Thinkin’ of moving to the city. Get’n me a bigger hat.”

By Will Pedley

ournful trumpets, a lamenting harmonica, tender guitar and a gravelly gentle lilt of a vocal. “Down Juan”, the opening track of Casa, lazily drifts out of the speakers and into the listener’s head like a wind picking up soil from the fields and blowing it into the city. “I’ve noticed since I came to Vancouver, what I wanted to write about was totally different from what my urban friends wanted to write about; the images and everything that seemed real to me. I really appreciate tangible things, having been raised in

the dirt, that’s what I crave and relate to,” says Roger Dean Young, contemplating the influence that his rural upbringing has had on his craft. There’s certainly a down to earth sensibility to the music created by Young and his collective, the Tin Cup. This perhaps comes from their approach, recording much of the third (and most recent) album with producer Bryan Seely, “in his living room with the fire going and his dog there.” Continues Young, “I always want the songs to be really of the moment and organic. There’s a lot of improvisation. I’m a fan

of jazz and I appreciate certain classical music but a lot of it’s too rigorous in terms of its rules. I just want music that is very supple and malleable.” In order to facilitate this musical vision,Young has gradually built the Tin Cup over a number of years. The constantly evolving band consists of “good friends that are musicians from a really nice music community that I feel a part of.” He goes on to explain his particular requirements; “It’s tricky to find really accomplished players that don’t mind playing three or four chord folk songs. I just want musicians

Definitely no mean feat. “The type of music that we make is not necessarily the type of music that I can ever see paying the bills,” states Young, who currently combines being a musician with counseling at a high school. “I didn’t want to be caught up in an attitude towards music where considering that you’ve made it is when you’ve quit your day job. To me, making it is when you’ve made something that you can really stand behind as a product. And whether people buy it or not, that’s a whole other thing.” With a music industry that promotes easily digestible but quickly forgotten mediocrity, it’s reassuring to know that there’s still music that is honest, thoughtful, and leaves your belly feeling full. n

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COMEDY CONTENTS

Middle guy from the Goodnight Lovin’ “Hey kids welcome to my tool shed... I have a big purple hammer”

The Goodnight Lovin’ and the Night Terrors

Midwest Rock ‘n’ Roll Double Feature!!!

By Jenny C

verybody loves the double feature. Two movies for the price of one – now that’s fucking magic. And if it weren’t for your ass hurtin’ so damn much after being crammed for three and a half hours into one of those crappy flip-down seats, we’d all be milkin’ this cinematic phenomenon a hell of a lot more. Monday night, the 20th of November will pretty much be the rock ‘n’ roll equivalent to the double feature: one admission will get you TWO rad bands from Milwaukee, the Night Terrors and the Goodnight Loving. But this time you don’t have to worry about the gross middle-aged couple sucking face in the back row making those icky slurpin’ moan sounds (actually it’s Pub 340, so you never know…

heh) and that prick that somehow always ends up sitting next to you leaning all over YOUR armrest? Well, not this night. The only thing you’re gonna have to worry about with this double feature party put on by Perfect Youth is how hard you’re gonna hit the wall when the Midwest rock ‘n’ roll starts throwin’ you around. And just like the best double features, November 20th promises something for everybody. Local heroes Ladies Night and Vancougar will be opening the night up, it’ll be sort of like uh… um…gah…. Ah fuck. There’s no way to draw this out anymore… While I’m all over rambled-tangent-intros, this one’s a bit much - even for me. There’s just no way to

Awwww mom! Can I shoot magical light rays with my music like the Night Terrors?

keep this double-feature concept afloat. It’s over. I might as well come clean and stop stalling… I’ve opened and closed my mailbox 17 times in the last three days - it’s been empty every time. The thing is, it’s not supposed to be empty. It’s supposed to be filled with a great big envelope from the Night Terrors and the Goodnight Loving stuffed full of records and presskits. And it was supposed to be here six days ago. So I’m a little anxious right? Nope. I’d say I’m more rumbling towards projectile nausea seeing as how its five to nine on Wednesday night and deadline’s tomorrow. How the hell am I going to come up with 1200 entertaining words from one very empty mailbox? Brutal. I should be at home blasting the Night Terrors newest record Cobras and laughing my ass off as my next-door neighbour hammers on the wall trying to stop the domestic dispute that is the Terrors’ snotty deranged Midwest punk. From what I’ve heard courtesy of Myspace (www.myspace.com/nightterrors) - did I mention how fucking much I hate the mailman right now?! - this three-piece is fucked up on all the right things: distortion, booze and belligerent Alice Cooper lyrics. That gap in my vinyl, right between Jeffery Novak and the Catholic Boys is just calling out for a piece of the Terrors’ skuzzy charm that draws influences from the likes of Suicide, Johnny Thunders, the Oblivians, and CPC GangBangs. It’s good times when a band likens their music to Bran Flakes; you’re gonna eat them up and then totally shit your pants! Like I said, good times. So what the hell are the Night Terrors doing on tour with the starry-eyed country-twang of the Goodnight Loving anyways? I mean how do you go from the Terrors’ gnarly sleaze to a folk-pop outfit that takes cues from the likes of Tom Waits, Red Stripe, and the Beach Boys? Well, once the Night Terrors get going, it won’t be long before you’re covered in cold sticky sweat and screaming out for your mommy, so you’ll be needing some comfort and the Goodnight Loving will be there to offer it up with the polished sounds of their sophomore release

Cemetery Trails. I’d lend you my copy to check out, but wait... seems the goddamn mailman decided to be a fucking douche fuck and hold the bloody thing ransom, so you’ll have to listen to it on Myspace instead (www.myspace.com/thegoodnightloving). The five piece’s classic appeal could be compared to that of the Deadly Snakes or even Reigning Sound, which shouldn’t be surprising since “the coolest man in rock ‘n’ roll today,” Mr. Greg Cartwright (Reigning Sound, Compulsive Gamblers, Oblivians) produced Cemetery Trails and even played on several tracks. Totally rad. The Night Terrors think so too, which is why the record was actually put out by guitarist, Kevin, on his label, Dusty Medical Records. But don’t expect a bunch of clover chewing cowboys to politely rock you. It’s not like the Goodnight Loving aren’t up here to have a good time and, in their words, “get fucked up on your famous weed and ogle your notoriously foxy ladies,” info, by the way, they claim to have learned from Wikipedia… uh huh. Even better, the Monday night show at Pub 340 is happens to be the final night of their tour, so both bands will be out for an extra good time, which means… you should be too. And if you’re anything like me, and still totally pissed about the Detroit Cobras/King Khan and BBQ show being cancelled a couple Mondays back, this is your chance to become a belligerent-dancing-slob on a Monday night after all! Fucking perfect. And if things end up getting as messy as I hope, and you wake up the next morning feeling like a sack of shit, well, tune into Bryce Dunn’s CITR radio show, Third Time’s A Charm, from 9:30 – 11:30 am for another set from both Milwaukee bands. It’s sure to settle your insides faster than a stack of pancakes from Bon’s. So even if my package never arrives… gulp… at least Monday, November 20th will, and with it a fucking killer double feature of Midwest rock ‘n’ roll. You better be there. The Night Terrors and the Goodnight Loving play Pub340 Monday November 20th. n

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CONTENTS

The ladies know its more than just pointy ears

The VulcanGlory Freedom Fighters to the Prime Directive By Dale DeRuiter

am shitting my pants for this band right now, they are that good. What the Vulcan Freedom Fighters are doing is just so goddamn refreshing. Hearing a band make good music is and always will be rad, but when the band pushes it further by not sullying their art with personal stuff that I don’t care about or relate to – well, that’s genius. Instead of trying to hash out some past experiences or go on some damn fool internal journey, the Vulcan Freedom Fighters just sample old Star Trek episodes. If you want to get you hands on some of this badass shit, go to http://www.vulcansrock.com/freemusic. html and download the album. The Vulcan Freedom Fighters are so sweet, they’re giving you that shit for free. Pretty nice of them, wouldn’t you say? But then,Vulcans do tend to have a fundamental decency about them. A smorgasbord of tense moments from Gene Roddenberry’s original vision are coupled on the album Startdate Unknown with tracks that range from slow western to techno fused math rock. The best part about the whole thing is that you don’t even have to be a gigantic Star Trek nerd to get it. The album is fully understandable without so much as viewing one episode. The whole thing came about when Chris Haines and Brandon Wiggins had some time off from their indie pop band, Cincinatti’s Anonymous Bosch. They’d been throwing the Freedom Fighters idea around for a couple years, and with the Bosch all hung up, they finally figured they’d just go for it. “We have both been huge fans of Star Trek and we have always been sneaking in soundbites for the tracks on

our other bands’ records,” Wiggins explains. “And the whole time we thought that we would really have to find the time to do this justice.” I figured at first that each song on Stardate Unknown represented a single, individual episode, but chief Wiggins corrects me. “We either had a specific episode we wanted to do so we would write the music and then pulled little bits from the episode, or we would go through all the material and see thematically what would fit the emotional arc of either (the) music we had, or we would write the music.”

haven’t come face to face with that. We haven’t been slammed yet.” Wiggins adds, “I have friends in bands who would roll their eyes and describe it as being completely contrived. From our standpoint it’s an honest effort. It is different, there’s no question, but from our artistic point of view, this is a record that we really wanted to do. We spent a lot of time on it, and we feel we did the best we could to take what was going on emotionally and try to capture that musically.” Haines and Wiggins did cheat though on one small part of Stardate. The song “Vorta” uses a sample lifted from David Lynch’s Dune, because the desired soundbite – Spock screaming “the pain!!” – from The Devil in the Dark episode (first series), couldn’t be separated from all the background noise. This is also why Kirk’s famous “Kahn” bellow is missing from the track “Kahn”. These problems will disappear once the band gets some of the original series masters into their grubby little meat hooks (my Grade 9 science teacher would use that phrase about our little pink puffy teenager hands when we were going to handle the microscopes. But he was an asshole. I digress). With the master recordings, the boys can surgically separate the vocal tracks from all the other incidental music, foley, walla, and rhubarb. Hot damn, that would lead to some sweet samples. I hope they get something from Sulu when he went crazy and ripped his shirt off and attacked the bridge with a rapier and took Uhura hostage. He was so sweaty and gay and crazy - it was awesome. n

We haven’t been slammed… yet

o r

All the samples are from the original series; nothing from the Next Generation or subsequent franchises. “It’s the old school original series that we are fans of,” Haines assure me, “And that is what we wanted to do.” Not to worry though - with only the Kirk years to plunder, there’s still plenty of material left. “We have decided to stick to the old series, but we do feel there is more Vulcan Freedom Fighters left. There are two more albums without going to the masters, too,” he adds. Some douche bags are obviously going to call Stardate Unknown a novelty disc, and then try to dismiss or diminish it. Don’t let these pretentious losers dissuade you: this is some good material right here. Asked what he thought about the inevitable poo-poohing, Haines replies, “I expect it, but we

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PHOTOS: JEN DODDS

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CONTENTS

PHOTOS: JEN DODDS

AlternateAAction New Beginning

“I’ve been to the desert on a horse with no name, it felt good to get out of the rain... na na na na na na na, na na na, na na... na na na na na na, na na na, na na”

By Chris Walter

reg Huff, lead growler for Alternate Action, is not the kind of guy who is happy to watch everyone else have all the fun. Therefore, he has been in one band or another for most of his adult life. Starting with the legendary (at least in Canadian streetpunk circles) Glory Stompers in the early ‘90s, Greg has made a name for himself in the rowdy streetpunk / Oi! scene. And things were rough in the early days. The Glory Stompers, who were from Edmonton, had a bitter rivalry with a Calgary punk band called Kentucky Fried Children that culminated in a massive brawl in which the drummer for the Glory Stompers had his arm broken. Where am I going with this? Oh, yeah, I’m trying to illustrate that Greg is an intense person who is not afraid to dust it up if the mood strikes him. Indeed, that attitude has served him well on his journey from the Glory Stompers to the Subway Thugs, then to the Lancasters, and now to his current outfit, Alternate Action. Here, Greg is at the top of his game, and rather than change the direction of the music, he has simply improved it. Alternate Action is still the same three-chord, sing-along streetpunk, but the songs are catchier, the riffs more direct. I was surprised to learn that another Vancouver troublemaker named Tobias Chobotuck played guitar in the band. It was a great shock to find out that Tobias could do more than guzzle pints of beer or work security at punk shows. I was surprised at how tight the band sounded after only several gigs. Not only that, but the recent 7”single on Longshot Records is a brilliant combination of streetpunk aggression and snarling Oi attitude. Hawthorne Heights it ain’t. And so, with all brown nosing out of the way, I took my questions to the band. First I learned that the drummer’s name is Matt and that the original

bassist, Chris Scuzz, moved to Victoria not long after the band was formed. I asked Greg what he hoped to do with Alternate Action that he hadn’t already accomplished with his other bands. What’s so special about this one? “I feel that we should get out there and tour when time permits. My other bands didn’t tour as much as I would have liked, so that is something I would like to accomplish. We also would like to keep focusing our energy in the studio. We would like to get lots of our music out there and we already have more studio time booked for November. I think the sound has changed a bit, and the feedback from the 7” is positive.” When Greg said that it was difficult to find the right people that enjoy playing the same music, Tobias recalled his introduction to the band. “I had ten days to learn all the songs, and then we played the Templars show in Seattle. That was kinda stressful but I pulled it off all right. As long as everyone involved is dedicated and willing to put in the time and effort, it’s not really that difficult.” I wanted to learn more about the upcoming EP. Is it a problem to have a French label? Tobias had to think it over for a moment. “The EP is done except for the sleeve. We keep sending our ideas to Nelly from Narayan Records in France, but we haven’t come to an agreement on anything. Part of the problem is that our files are too small to get a good quality image. We’ll have it worked out soon, hopefully. I like the idea of having a French label release. It opens some doors for us as far as international cultural exchange grants are concerned. There is also a much bigger and more receptive audience in Europe for streetrock and Oi! so hopefully we can sell a few records there and have a successful tour. I have no problem with the French. A lot of folks

seem to dislike them for whatever reason. Twice as many Frenchmen died fighting against the Axis than the number of Americans in WWII. For every truffle gobbling, beret-wearing wine snob, there are dozens of ordinary people who live pretty much the same as we do.” I’m always torn between a desire to ask silly questions or find out what the band is really about, and just for once, I decided to do the latter. Greg wanted to keep recording and to tour overseas and Tobias felt much the same. Next time, I’ll ask them if they can spell their names with piss in the snow. I should have given up with the serious questions, Instead I asked them to describe the music. Tobias replies, “Describing music is like dancing about architecture but I’ll give it a shot. Greg’s trademark vocals are instantly recognizable. Clean but loud guitar work with lots of ring to it. Solid but intricate drumming. I guess it’s fast-paced melodic streetrock.” I also learned that Greg will handle bass duties until they find the perfect person and that they will continue to record with Jason Solyom. Then I went back to find out which Vancouver bands they listened to when they were coming up. Tobias says, “I saw DOA when I was 10-years old and it was a pretty influential moment for me. My dad had a copy of Hawaii by the Young Canadians that I used to play a lot as a kid. The Subhumans had some classic songs too.” By now, I felt a need to get personal. I remembered that Tobias had come back from a Business show in Seattle with a broken foot, so I asked him how it had happened. “Greg and I got into some wrestling outside this Irish pub and I got my foot wedged between a car tire and the curb. Greg kinda jumped on me and took my knee to the sidewalk with my foot wedged flat against the ground. The result was a spiral fracture. I thought it was sprained pretty badly and the doctor agreed that it wasn’t broken so I hobbled around on it for 10 days. I finally

got it x-rayed and the doctors at emerg were flabbergasted. I missed three months of work over it.” We were back on solid ground, so I asked if there were any pioneers left, or if bands like Thrice had taken over the world. Tobias: “Sure there are lots of pioneers left. I don’t think that too many of them play punk rock though. Rock ‘n’ roll is not the most innovative medium for artistic expression. Anyone who thinks otherwise is kidding themselves. These bands that try to sound unique and ambient and whatnot, like name any college rock emo band, they invariably wind up sounding pretentious and annoying. Rock ‘n’ roll ceases to rock when it gets too sophisticated and artsy. You don’t need a bloody Theremin or a glockenspiel to rock and roll. There are obvious exceptions to this but generally, the music that gets your fists in the air has a few basic ingredients. A good beat, three or four chords, and a bit of melody are all that are really needed. If I wanted to hear musical pioneering, I’d be into jazz or some other crap that doesn’t interest me.” When I asked if they had any kind words for Sam Sullivan, Gordon Campbell, or Stephen Harper, Tobias had this to say. “I had the pleasure of meeting Premier Campbell last year at the Legion on Remembrance Day. I introduced my wife Kari to him as my designated driver. I couldn’t resist, but Kari was mortified.” While we were at it, I went on to ask Tobias if he was happy with the current political landscape in Vancouver. “I was born and bred here and I love Vancouver. I’d like to see more resources to combat the drug problem. People need to be realistic about it and hopefully we can deal with it in a humane way.” I wrapped things up by giving Tobias an opportunity to take a pot shot at the Olympics. “Actually, I hope I’ll be on vacation somewhere when that gong show comes to town. Buenos Aires is really nice in December I hear. The Beer Olympics is more our style.” n

Rock ‘n’ roll ceases to rock when it gets too sophisticated and artsy. You don’t need a bloody Theremin or a glockenspiel to rock and roll

“na na na na na na na, na na na, na na... na na na na na na, na na na, na na” The Nerve November 2006 Page 15

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God’s Lonely Man By Herman Menervemanana

nd Jesus said to them, “A prophet is not without honor, except in his own country, and among his kindred, and in his own

house.” Was Jesus talking about the Vancouver music scene when he said that? Specifically, about Marq DeSouza, who has spent over 10 years in this city, knocking them out of the park to not nearly enough acclaim? Bible scholars are divided, but for the most part say, “no.” DeSouza nonetheless, and in spite of the fact that you’re probably going “Marq De-who?”, has a serious boatload of reliable critics on his side (but not St. Mark the Evangelist), and he’s had his moments (two nominations for Georgia Straight Music Awards, when he fronted Solarbaby). When the man’s latest solo album dropped last April, however, the ground didn’t tremble. It should have. When he shows up at the Nerve office for a brief chat one stormy Wednesday night, DeSouza seems a little guarded. Maybe it’s because we wedged him into a dimly lit and pretty foul smelling corner of the music editor’s office, on one of those chairs made famous by the Abu Ghraib photographs, where he sat, bundled up in his coat, throwing a lot of sidelong glances at his interrogator. He’s older than he looks, and extremely self-possessed, probably because he has so much experience behind him. “I’ve been around and I’ve seen so many people and things and bands and music and genres and next-big-things, all come and go. All those bands who were supposed to be huge five years ago, and don’t even play anymore.” He shakes his head, continuing, “I’ve never really fit into a definitive clique, you know? The alt country crowd, the punk crowd, the CITR crowd… I’ve kinda flirted with all of them but I’ve never really felt comfortable aligning myself with one movement or anything like that. I could probably be a bit more forthcoming but it’s not really in my nature to be doing too much of that sort of schmoozing, I guess. I just do what I do and let things happen. And I work really hard to make things happen, but I’m not interested in being part of any kind of movement. I kinda get embarrassed when I see things like that.” DeSouza seems to think that the work is its own reward, in refreshing contrast to just about every other band or musician in this city, almost all of whom have had their virtue blighted by an infantile need for attention. It makes for some good

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short-term spectacle, but not much else. DeSouza on the other hand has two solo albums behind him, and two with Solarbaby, and they’re all outstanding, tasteful, unencumbered by fashion, and will no doubt delight future historians. For his latest self-titled release – true to his hungrily creative nature – DeSouza recorded a paltry 28 songs. Pathetic! “Not just half-assed ideas,” he further clarifies, “but full, finished, mastered songs.” He winnowed it down to 14 tracks in the end. “We just had some pure country with mandolins, double bass, no drums – porch style country,” he says, of the ones that were left off. “And we had some hard city blues stuff, again no drums, just open tuning and slide guitars…” Wot a shame that we don’t get to hear those yet, as DeSouza has a remarkable facility for switching genres. As it stands, the album tends to drive down the middle of the road – and I mean that in the best way – with the occasional incursion of twang, or the odd rootsy flourish. On my personal favourite. “Glimpse of Her”, DeSouza masters the kind of fleet-footed radiostealth Americana that old hands like Tom Petty

I know it’s confusing for listeners, because if you just hear that, you don’t necessarily know what’s round the corner…” No shit! Any artist who sets about slashing his own canvas or otherwise fucking with the formula, however, gets my approval. And believe me, “Prey Becomes Predator” is one truly perverse way to open an album that otherwise has a credible classic rock feel (DeSouza will roll his eyes when he sees the words “classic rock”). Here’s Thing #2): DeSouza is an old head. He generally ends up being compared to Elvis Costello, Dylan, the Stones, Wilco… (“I don’t even like Wilco at all, I gotta say. I never even barely listened to them.”) but his eyes light up when he starts talking about Guns n Roses. “Appetitite for Destruction is so perfect in every way,” DeSouza says, like he’s wearing short pants and eating Lik-m-aid Fun Dip. “I saw them five or six times back in the day. I saw them open for Iron Maiden in Calgary. Maiden was good, but Guns were better. That was an awesome show. I can’t wait for the next Maiden DVD. That’ll be the Powerslave era, and that’s the best time.” It’s hard

I’m not interested in being part of any kind of movement. I kinda get embarrassed when I see things like that or John Hiatt do, although, tragically, when I try to explain this to DeSouza, the only name I can come up with is Bruce Hornsby (I was high). “Don’t put that in there,” he says. Weirdly, the only thing I don’t like about DeSouza’s new album is also the one thing that is probably closest to his heart – the glam metal exercise “Prey Becomes Predator” which kicks off the record. I bring it up because it illuminates two things about DeSouza: 1) he kinda doesn’t give a fuck, though if you’re paying attention, you knew that already. “I’ve written a lot of different types of songs and that one is really just an extension of the kind of music I grew up listening to,” he explains, with a shrug. “Which is basically the hard rock metal from that era. And I’m a fan of records that really come out swinging, and that’s a track that definitely comes out swinging. But

to reconcile that last statement with the guy sitting here – the same guy who wrote the magnificent “Keep Your Gunpowder Dry” on Solarbaby’s second album: an epic torrent of bleak western poetry that doesn’t falter over nine unbelievably powerful verses. It’s his “Desolation Row.” Funnily enough, a friend of mine happens to know Charlie Sexton, who toured with Dylan a lot. Sexton says Dylan showed up at his hotel room one night, and told him he wanted to cover Queen’s “We Are the Champions”. It goes to show you never can tell. Still and all, how did DeSouza end up here, after his baptism in hair metal? “Like any other kid,” he explains, “You’re 13 or 14, you see a picture of the Crue, and pretty soon you’re in over your head. I got into real hard rock stuff right away. Then at 18 or 19 you start going back a bit further, so if you listen to Guns n Roses, then you move on

to Aerosmith, and then you listen to Rolling Stones. And you go back further, just like everybody else. And even now, when I hear somebody, I wanna know how they got that way, so you listen to their influences.” Does Panic! At the Disco listen to Robert Johnson, I ask? “I doubt it,” he sniffs. DeSouza is already thinking about his next album. He confesses, “I feel driven to do what I do though I sometimes wonder why, coz it would be easier not to. If you stop and think about it too much, you might get an answer you don’t want to hear. He’s also thinking about a new MO, based on his own favourite track from the current album, a great, snakey, orgiastic slide guitar hymn to self-loathing called “Daddy Doom”. “What I’ll do next is another record but about five times quicker,” he says. “Daddy Doom” was cut from top to bottom at the (sadly defunct) Komrade studios. This is in contrast to a bunch of others that were recorded at Greenhouse with big-shot equipment and all those wanky CanCon gold albums hanging off every wall. “Greenhouse is a nice place,” he says, “But I don’t need to walk in and have DVD players in the lobby. I don’t need to pay for that.” DeSouza and his crew did 16 bed tracks in one day there. “That was a little much,” he smiles. “You tend to lose focus on a song when you’re thinking of the next one.” And so we can expect the enigmatic Mr. DeSouza to continue doing things his own way. We end our chat with me not much the wiser but a little more advanced in my admiration. I don’t really understand Marq DeSouza, and I expect he likes it that way. He’s got that God’s Only Man feel about him – he even keeps the people he plays with at arms length. “That’s a good thing, I think. I like the way I have things now - a loose but steady band, they don’t really know anymore about me than anybody else, and they don’t ask me and I don’t ask them.” I’m compelled to top that statement off with the gayest question ever. “Are you a loner?” He sighs, looks at me like I’m an idiot. “Even if I am it just sounds really lame,” he moans. “I have my own way of doing stuff. On my own. So if that’s a loner, then yeah – sure. “ “But it just sounds so lame…” he says, his eyebrows knitting. n

PHOTO: DALE DERUITER

CONTENTS

CONTENTS MUSIC

reviews Live21

Trivium, Protest the Hero, the Sword / LadyTron, CSS / Phoenix / Pelican, Daughters / the Black Angels, the Tyde / Rancid, Aquabats, Phatty Matty

PHOTO: DALE DERUITER

Album22

The Akward Stage, Beck, Betty Kracker, Bloodshot Bill, Bobnoxious, Bright Eyes, Caliphone, Candygram for Mongo, Career Suicide, the Deadcats, the Death Rays, Diecast, Dmonstrations, Evanescence, Five Horse Johnson, Thea Gillmore, the Gothic Archies, Heaven Shall Burn, Helmet, the Hold Steady, Intronaut, Jackalope, the Jon Cohen Experimental, Jucifer, Left McRighty and the Boxcar Cadavers, Lemonheads, Make Believe, the Massacres, Million Dollar Marxists, the Mooney Suzuki, Mothra, the New Lou Reeds, Joanna Newsom, Octoberman, the Orchid Highway, Petra Jean Phillipson, Plus Device, Quagmire, Samiam, the Shanks, Siege, Sonic’s Rendezvous Band, Sound Bluntz, Erol Sora, Square Root of Margaret, Street Dogs, Suburban Lockdown, Sub Rosa, Swollen Members, Unearth, Warpig, the Whiskey Jacks, and Worst CD of the Month....

dvd25

David Bertrand goes queer on Blackmore’s leathery codpiece and the Pixies re-unite... again.

Book27

Yes, we are actually literate... Well, Devon Cody is at least. Ish.

games28

Dale De Ruiter has a gigantic penis and you want it in your mouth mmmm because it’s glorious oh and he played a video game

The Nerve November 2006 Page 19

The Nerve November 2006 Page 20

LIVE MUSICCONTENTS REVIEWS

RANCID

to the Cambie instead. Arriving at the venue sometime later, I was reminded of exactly who shows up to concerts so early: kids. My God, I’m surprised the floor wasn’t covered in building blocks, Barbie dolls and the bloody condoms discarded by those roadie sex offenders. I felt old at the age of 24. Protest the Hero, who were playing as we entered, looked like babies up there. I felt like telling them to turn down that racket. Protest the Hero isn’t bad or anything, but doesn’t achieve much more than being technically proficient. So they played, talked about how some long hairs called them ‘Fags’ or something, and I was left thirsty for more drinks. Me and Bertrand (aka Tron) realized the one band we both wanted to see, the Sword, had already played so early we missed them, so out of desperation/frustration we walked around. “Maybe someone is making moonshine in the urinals!” Sad, I know, but one needs hope to survive in an environment like this. Children everywhere! Village of the Damned! Trivium finally came out and they projected the band’s T symbol all over the walls, which looked more like HeMan’s Master of the Universe sword than a ‘T’. Then I saw Matt Heafy come on stage and remembered he isn’t even old enough to drink in is own country. My God, this daycare festival must have been his idea! ‘Fuck Him!’ I thought, as he busted into one of his Metallica rip-off riffs. I wasn’t happy, I wasn’t drinking, what was I doing here? So we decided to leave, feeling as though we had crossed the barrier from metal maniac kids to jaded old men, old enough now to be the registered sex offenders, in fact. On Oct 24th I grew up a little bit, but in a way I died a little bit also. - Dave Von Bentley

PHOTO: JEN DODDS

Trivium/Protest the Hero/the Sword Croatian Cultural Center,Vancouver, BC Tuesday, October 24th, 2006 When I was a kid I’d always show up to a concert at least an hour before the doors opened. I’d walk around and look for band members, but all I ever found were the registered sex offender roadies. Now that I’m older, I don’t care much about meeting band members, getting sexually molested, or even getting to a concert on time, for that matter. What I do care about is having a good time, meeting cool people, and having a few wobbly pops on the way down the road to metal glory. Since tonight’s concert was an all ages show at the CCC, I knew I was in trouble. What I needed was a drink or four - not this, with the retarded opening time of 6 pm. I refused to submit to this schedule and went

Ladytron/CSS Commodore Ballroom,Vancouver, BC Saturday, October 14th, 2006 Remember seven years ago when everyone would make fun of techno by going dun-sss dun-sss dun-sss? Well, that was the first four-and-a-half minutes of the CSS set. Instead of leaving it at that, some girl ran out and started screaming “C-S-S” over top of that beat. How goddamn epic. Is CSS worthy of the hype that has been rammed down our throat? No, dear sirs and madams, it is not. This band is a soft Kathleen Hanna mixed with a 15 year-old After School Special. And the drummer looks like a molester.

Can’t forget to grow that molester stash! I mean, fuck, you’re a French-Canadian band. The singer’s dancing is probably the most annoying thing I’ve seen since I had the misfortune of watching a guy trying to pinch holes in his skin at 7:30 in the morning on East Hastings. Terrible interpretive dance, mixed with a spazzy toddler. It’s as if she was drunk and at a party six years ago, said, “Hey everyone, watch me make fun of the ‘80s and dance like a retard!” And then all of her friends laughed and said that she was soooooo funny and don’t ever stop dancing like that… AND SHE NEVER DID. CSS sucked, but no matter; I was there for Ladytron. After the hour-long break and two over priced vodka tonics, I almost got exactly what I wanted. The lead singer was a little off, but every band is allowed some margin of error in its live show. The band more than made up for it by sounding just like the album. The disgusting part was the second singer, the low voice. She scared me. She was so flat that she entirely ruined “Blue Jeans”, which sounded like a drag queen at karaoke. More about the second singer: she looked like the pissed off friend of a girl you’re trying to bang.You know the one.You talk about it behind closed doors with your prospect, but she insists her friend isn’t a lesbian. Oh, and by the way, you’re a dick for even mentioning it. You should know better. This girl will not let you fuck her friend because you made a joke about periods a month and a half ago. It probably wouldn’t be possible for Ladytron to take itself more seriously. All the gay boys are cutting loose - why can’t everyone? But I made the effort to come to your show; the least you can do is not look like your fingernails are being ripped off when you play your instruments. If music is this painful for you maybe you just shouldn’t play it anymore. - Dale DeRuiter Phoenix Richards on Richards,Vancouver, BC Thursday, September 26th, 2006 Seinfeld.You might have heard of it. Selfabsorbed, city dwelling idiots talking about bullshit all day long. That really describes me and my friends. Just riffing on each other and strangers non-stop, just for fun (but it always struck me as odd that none of the characters on Seinfeld drank or smoked). My favourite episode was the one where Frank Costanza refused to help Kramer cook for the Jewish singles night he was planning, because he once poisoned his whole platoon in Korea with tainted beef. When he finally changes his mind, Costanza screams, “I feel like a Phoenix rising out from Arizona!” I’ve never been to Arizona, but I met a guy from there once and he was annoying. I really think that Frank Constanza’s quote was an accurate way of describing Phoenix (the band). The first album was kinda crappy. A bit electro and more-than-words fruity. Like Arizona. But then, seemingly overnight, but in reality a few years, the group emerged as a super pop force. I guess learning English better (they’re from France), knocking up Sofia Coppola, and getting a good record deal really helped them out. Not to mention writing and recording the whole album in Berlin. La Rocca called in sick, so Phoenix was starting up as we arrived. Perfect. No standing around trying to get noticed by chicks with men’s haircuts. What followed was the tightest hour in pop history. Clean and polished. I felt like a pedophile watching it. Hand claps, small jagged solos. Lots of moans and breaks. A really good show. And, once again, I can’t seem to get over the beer barrel girl at this place. If I only had the nerve to tell her I love her. After the show we all retired to my friend Jimi’s place for shake joints and my other friend Russ’s serious girlfriend was moving away to Iceland forever the next day, so things got heavy. Overall, it was a fantastic show and and and and… I almost forgot to mention that out front, on our way into the venue, there was this odd live art show where two girls had their skirts hiked up and were pretending to be really drunk or really high. Maybe they actually needed my help. I don’t know, but you could totally see their undies! What a grand night! - Waltergeist

in Black Flag. Daughters took the stage and proceeded to rock the shit out of the place. It would be an understatement to say they stole the show, putting on a performance where the band’s stage presence was second only to their hilarious antics. They opened the set with the singer launching himself into the audience, basically scaring the shit out of that poor girl in the front row. He made up for this later on by chugging her beer. There was a slight hiccup when the bassist broke a string, but the singer simply used this as an opportunity to request the audience buy him drinks. He actually did this between every song, so I reckon he went through at least eight rye and gingers in the space of a set that was 30 minutes, tops. He was actually getting visibly tipsy towards the last song, so I bought him a double. I did this because they had a shirt on sale at the merch table entitled “Vagina Bats”. It goes without saying that I bought it. After their set, he told me about the vasectomy he was getting before they go to Europe. That earns rock ‘n’ roll points in my book. After what seemed like an overly long setup time, Pelican took the stage. They played competently, doing justice to anything they’ve recorded. Practically flawless. But it’s really hard for an instrumental band to be as engaging as any band with a singer, let alone one as entertainingly jarring as Daughters. I know, it isn’t fair, but there’s no crying in rock ‘n’ roll. - Simon Illrote

LADYTRON

PHOTO: LEIGH RIGHTON

PHOTO: DEVON CODY

THE BLACK ANGELS

The Black Angels/The Tyde Richard’s on Richards,Vancouver, BC Sunday, October 22nd, 2006 My mama always told me, “if you have nothing nice to say don’t say anything at all,” so… ah, fuck it. Since when did I ever listen to my mom? I have no idea who the first band was tonight, but I’m glad that there were a few walls separating me from the horrific attempt to mesmerize the crowd inside Richard’s with drawn out guitar solos. I had to take a deep breath and remind myself to go in with an open mind. Once inside, I tried desperately to find a chair to sit and relax as the Tyde was getting their shit together to play. As they took the stage all I could do was admire the singer’s beautifully groomed Magnum P.I blonde moustache. It flowered over his upper lip like a work of art. The Tyde finally started to work their magic… well, ok, it wasn’t magical actually; it was painful. They reminded me of the Beach Boys having a campfire sing along with the Partridge Family, but with way worse stage presence. They looked bored throughout their entire set. As bad as it sounds, I stood beside the single booing prick in the crowd and boo’d along in my mind. The highlight of the Tyde’s performance was when it was done, and they packed their shit up and got off the stage. Finally, THE BLACK ANGELS… oooooohhhhh. I was stoked to see the amount of work used to set up. I think I counted one computer, two sets of keys, six guitars and two bass guitars, one complete drum kit and a single drum, two sets of tambourines, two sets of maracas and five extremely talented group members. The whole time they played on a barely lit stage, all I could think about was a sexy set of lips releasing smoke into another sexy set of lips. I never thought of drone as being sexy but shit, if I had a dick it would be

full of blood and ready to cum. - Heather O’Brien Rancid/Aquabats/Phatty Matty & the Yellow Somethingoranothers Croation Cultural Centre,Vancouver, BC Friday, September 29th, 2006 So there we were, just me, my girlfriend, my six-year old son, and 800 teenage Rancid fans. I felt as out of place as a biker at a church auxiliary meeting, and the only people close to my age were on the stage. Actually, Tim, Lars, and the boys looked positively youthful as they bounced around the stage with practised abandon. The kids were all smoking two cigarettes and one joint each and the sound system was crappy, but I decided to ignore that and enjoy the show. And a good show it was. Rancid played, it seemed, mostly songs from And Out Come the Wolves, and judging from the reaction the kids liked that album as much as I do. There was a huge ol’ circle pit and the youngsters sang along with every song at the top of their tarry little lungs.Yes, love was in the air and puke was on the floor as Tim led the band through a string of hits including an acoustic version of “Fall Back Down” that went over surprisingly well. Sadly, my boy was very tired and the girlfriend had to take him home. I stayed, of course, until the show ended and the sweaty masses filed out. Extra props to Rancid for keeping the merch and ticket prices affordable. The Aquabats, dressed in blue spandex and sporting ample love handles, sang Latin flavoured, punk/pop songs about pizza and taco chips. At one point, they dropkicked a roadie dressed as a lobster into submission. They weren’t really my thing, but the singer later gave my son a free CD and an Aquabats colouring book. How cool is that? Phatty Matty is a young punk band that did its best to entertain. The opening slot is a thankless task, so I’ll reserve judgment until a future date. It’s not easy to make punk sound fresh these days. My favourite memory of the evening, however, might be the three punk rock girls who hugged me at the door on the way in. Sigh, punk rock girls… - Chris Walter

LIVE Pelican/Daughters The Lamplighter,Vancouver, BC Sunday, October 1st, 2006 I regret to admit that I missed the opening act, KEN Mode, which was a true shame because everyone told me they rocked. Plus, the acronym in their name stands for “Kill Everyone Now”. It’s taken from Henry Rollins’ Get In The Van, where he presumably talks about other stuff besides reminding everyone he was

The Nerve November 2006 Page 21

CONTENTS The Awkward Stage Heaven is for Easy Girls Mint Well these guys win the prize for best-named record. Before listening to this album I never really got the whole indie pop thing. The Akward Stage doesn’t sound new and fresh - it just sounds nice. It’s all smooth and contains elements of everything from Ben Folds to James. The only problem with this album is it’s too digestable, and 10 seconds after listening to it, I’ve forgotten all about it. - Dale DeRuiter Beck The Information Interscope Darling of the critics and eclectic genrehopping Gen-X hero Beck is back, with an album that he began in 2003, while still riding high on the success of Guero. The Information harks back to the glory days of Odelay, with funky hip-hop influences, the trademark Beck ironic rapping and weird electronic effects. A Nigel Godrich production, there seems to have been too much work put into a lot of the tracks. The delightful throwaway aspect of Beck’s writing is therefore lost, but it seems perfect that this is his ‘Scientology concept album’ as Beck is a recent convert, and a champion of the absurd. It’s definitely good value for fans, being a two-disc release, featuring 15 tracks and 15 homemade videos. There is no cover artwork, just a blank page and sheets of stickers for the purchaser to arrange as they please. How very postmodern. - Stephanie Heney Betty Kracker Easy Bay Coven Independent Mike McLean and the band recorded this six-song EP at local hotspot rehearsal studio Faceplant. They didn’t do a half bad job of it. Guitars ring in all the right places, drums pound appropriately, bass undulates and the vocals careen over top of the smartly arranged and well-written tunes. Shades of early Siouxsie on opener “Driven”, which serves as a fine, lead track and sets the table for the catchy glam-pop and memorable guitar tag line of “Cool”. “Jell-O Mould” is a driving Buzzcocks (Circa Another Music In A Different Kitchen) rager with dueling vocal action. The band touches on many different genres and mashes it up quite nicely. Something here for almost everyone… especially fans of most post-punk UK pop circa 1979. - Boy Howdy Bloodshot Bill Trashy, Greasy, Rockin’, Billy Flying Saucer Who needs bandmates when you’ve got Multiple Personality Disorder? Bloodshot Bill is a one-man band from Montreal who’s probably got prescriptions for the same meds as Hasil Adkins and Bob Log III stashed in his asspocket. However, genius never comes sedated. I imagine these scripts go to better use rolling smokes or wiping chicken grease from his chin. Among Bloodshot Bill’s split personalities you’ll find the likeness of P. Paul Fenech (Meteors), Mark “Sparky” Phillips (Demented Are Go), Roy Orbison with a terminal case of the hiccups, and Elvis Presley with the DTs. The ol’ nutjob couldn’t have picked a better name for the album too. Trashy, Greasy, Rockin’, Billy sounds like it was recorded in the trashcan of a fast food restaurant. It’ll up your cholesterol and give you zits just listening to it. This shit’s bad for your health boys and girls… just the way good rock ‘n’ roll should be. Go on an’ git you some! - Devon Cody

Leaf split or the 2001 Sub Pop single. But for the listener, this assemblage of out-ofprint singles, one-offs and unreleased tracks is a godsend. It allows them to delete their favourite Bright Eyes oddities from 1998-2005 and instead have 16 of them on a lovely CD, or, if vinyl is your thing, you can have 21. And you should have them because songs like “Amy in the White Coat” and “Motion Sickness” show that some of Bright Eyes’ finest songs have never appeared on an album. Also, little Conor Oberst has even included an unreleased seven inch with M. Ward for the obsessive collectors out there. Noise Floor deserves a home in any self-respecting fan’s collection. - BRock Thiessen Califone Roots and Crowns Thrill Jockey Tim Rutili and his band, Califone, have always experimented with the possibilities of folk music, but their new record finds them doing this to new extremes. Roots and Crowns is swimming in pools of loops and sounds from countless instruments—organic and electronic. Various percussive tools, horns, pianos and found sounds make multiple appearances throughout. And it all works brilliantly because the band has put this collage of sounds to concise song structures that Rutili carries with his inventive melodies. While a few songs jump out of the fold, like “3 Legged Animals” and the cover of Psychic TV’s “Orchids,” the album works best when heard as a whole. These are the type of songs that succeed in subtleties rather than immediate hooks, revealing a bit more with each listen. All this put together makes it likely Roots and Crowns will dethrone Roomsound as the quintessential Califone record. - BRock Thiessen Candygram For Mongo The Red Pill Independent You seriously expect me to waste my precious time on this, Mr. Music Editor? (Yes – Music Editor) Time that might be better spent massaging my prostate or sampling the peculiar aroma of my choda grease? Go fuck yourself. These candyass dickweeds sound like they’ve aspired to follow in the footsteps of Kim Mitchell. Except they somehow manage to make even the Wild Party himself seem sort of cool. Okay… not cool, maybe tolerable? Still… no small feat. You ‘d best watch what albums you give me next month buddy, as I’m prone to pulling the heads off newborn babies when I’m subjected to music this fucking god awful. Lucky there weren’t any nearby. Someone ought to give you a swift kick to the sac. (Bitterliver! In my office – NOW! – Music Editor) - Thomas Bitterliver Career Suicide Anthology Vol Two Deranged Listening to this is like ’82 all over again, as speedy, chaotic and fucked up as it all was. Sadly, I’m old now and cannot handle such insanity the way I once did. Nowadays, when I can’t hear any of the lyrics, or even the chorus, I soon lose interest. That said, the second track, and the slowest on the CD, is a midtempo number that rocked me the right way. I would have loved the shit out of the whole CD 20 years ago, but now I just can’t hack it. But you, you young little punk fuckers, will dig Anthology Vol 2 from beginning to end. Now, where’s my Geritol? - Chris Walter The Death Rays Demo EP Independent The Death Rays make me feel unwell. Maybe it’s because Rusty Haight’s voice sounds like the product of a steady diet of rancid meat, diesel fuel and old rototiller parts. Maybe it’s the wounded, hemorrhage-inducing guitar solo at the end of “Soul for Sale”. Or it could be the relentless gut-punch quality of Carson Archer’s drumming. Whatever the case, there’s plenty here to get you pukey. This is the music you might get if Shane MacGowan’s liver formed a rock band with his kidneys. If cancer had a theme song it could well be “Possession Blues”. Are you sick and depraved and looking for the antithesis of the feel-good hit of the summer? The Death Rays are your guys. Somebody pass the Gravol. - Devon Cody

the Cats come back. Feline 500 arrives after what was thought to be the dissolution of the band. Not so. Word on the street is that the Deadcats are planning more touring with a new line up in support of the new album — an album that offers up the same eclectic batch of goodies that Deadcats fans have come to expect from these psychobilly/hillbilly/surf relics. Feline 500 is easily the best produced of their records to date and also the best played. “Peggy Suicide” and the Meteors’ “Radioactive Kid” chug along at a foaming-from-the-mouth pace, while the Link Wray covers “Rumble” and “Jack the Ripper” call for a slow drive on a hot day in a fast car. Capping the album off is the manic — and aptly named — “Hornet’s Nest” that’ll have you shakin’ your tail like the Cats gave you fleas. Dirty old buggers… - Devon Cody Diecast Internal Revolution Century Media Diecast’s new record has clean/perfect production, great musicianship, and catchy songs. But all these twit dicks have done is absolutely rip off sonic mall metal pioneers Killswitch Engage. You know how people sometimes say the band you like sounds like another band, but to you it doesn’t? Well Diecast fans have to be deafer (and blinder) than Helen Keller to not hear the Killswitch Engage in Diecast. Granted, it might be slightly heavier, but ironically, the only reason I say that is because of the Slayer rip off riff in the song “Weakness”, demonstrating once again that Diecast really has nothing original to offer. The five ingredients of a Diecast “original” are: 1) Heavy Swedish metal inspired riffs 2) Screaming vocals 3) Sensitive ass-grabbing vocals in the chorus so the singer can spew out his lyrical pain like a nine-year-old girl with a scraped knee 4) Go back to the heavy riff after the homoerotic chorus 5) Finish with some screamo mallcore metal and BLAMMO! Batman, we have a Killswitch Eng... I mean, a Diecast original. For almost all 11 tracks that’s what happens, no exceptions, until a final oh so emo ballad that makes guys with thick framed glasses seem tough. The best advice I can give to these dudes (since they’re asking) is to stop being the power bottom at random truck stop, and hire a good lawyer, because I’m sure Killswitch Engage is going to hit your tender bum with a plagiarism suit. - David Von Bentley Dmonstrations Night Trrors. Shock! Gold Standard Laboratories When it comes to my spazz-rock I’ve always been pretty picky, especially now that the genre is so saturated with half-ass bands regurgitating the same old thing again and again. Dmonstrations falls into this trap and is definitely not adding anything new to the genre on Night Trrors. Shock! After trying my best to get through the record I eventually just gave up half way and put on my copy of Brainiac’s Hissing Prigs in Static Couture. I don’t really see the point of listening to a band like Dmonstrations when so many before them have done it so much better. If I was you I would just go spend your hard-earned money on something by Brainiac or the Fire Engines and forget about Dmonstrations. I like my herky jerky as much as the next guy, but there is just no need for another record like this. - BRock Thiessen Evanescence The Open Door Wind-Up Since the ‘chartbuster’ success of Evanescence’s major label debut Fallen, (it went double platinum and stayed on the Billboard Top 200 for 100 weeks), the band has managed to lose two original members (one of whom wrote a chunk of Fallen), a quickly-found replacement member has suffered a stroke, and singer Amy Lee is suing her manager for sexual harassment. So the pressure was really on for producing the ‘difficult’ second album. However, despite troubles and huge expectations, Evanescence has delivered. The Open Door, while not in any way a departure, is accomplished and, well, more of the same: Linkin Park meets a folky-goth, soaring vocal style. This is such a winning (and lucrative, stadium-filling) combination that there really is no need to change the formula. Single “Call Me When You’re Sober” is the obligatory ‘piss off’ to ex-boyfriend and ex-bandmate Ben Moody, and is a triumphant ambassador for what’s bound to be a soundtrack-providing and chartresiding album. - Stephanie Heney

Small Stone Five Horse Johnson treads the muddy ground between Howlin’ Wolf and Motörhead. This is mean-as-shit, heavy-footed blues rock, with all the attitude of a badass white boy and all the groove of a badass black dude. Imagine Lemmy with a tan, raised on crawfish and sour mash and you might have an idea of where Five Horse Johnson is coming from. Particular highlights here are the thick ‘n’ greasy slide guitar/harmonica assault of “Of Ditch Diggers and Drowning Men” and the big-belly swagger of “Keep Your Prize”. Curl up your lip, make a face like you farted, and dance like it hurts, this is some muthafuckin’ shit, yo. - Devon Cody Thea Gilmore Harpo’s Ghost Sanctuary British singer songwriter Gilmore is back after an unusually long three-year hiatus. And this time she’s doing it with record company backing rather than going it alone. Given her outspoken hatred of the music industry machine, Harpo’s Ghost is the awkward result of actually wanting some success and writing songs accordingly. Rather than her usual edgy and poetic folk, this is more of a poor man’s Dido and has a laidback and produced feel not heard before on Thea’s vast catalogue of albums. The clever and literate lyrics are still there, but it’s hard to be provocative when the sound is MOR, and her beautiful, breathy voice is lost. Best track is opener “The Gambler”, which unfortunately is the exact same tune as Mary J Blige and Method Man’s “You’re All I Need to Get By”. At least she’s not covering Buzzcocks tracks any more. - Stephanie Heney The Gothic Archies The Tragic Treasury Nonesuch When the author of Series of Unfortunate Events, Lemony Snicket, chose Stephin Merritt to compile a soundtrack for his 13 volumes of doom and gloom, he couldn’t have made a better choice. The “goth-bubblegum” music of Merritt’s non-Magnetic Fields project, the Gothic Archies, fits Snicket’s dark and quirky prose perfectly. Merritt’s work was only previously available with the audio books, but thankfully he’s now gathered them on The Tragic Treasury – a collection of songs about evil counts, corpses, and reptile rooms. To offset this nasty stuff, Merritt brings piles of humour and tongue-in-cheek lyrics, like on the romantically twisted “Shipwrecked”, where he turns decapitation into an act of love. Also, Merritt takes a break from acoustic instruments and returns to the synth-based compositions like on older records such as Holiday and Get Lost. When you put all this together you get the most enjoyable and entertaining thing Merritt has released in ages. - BRock Thiessen Heaven Shall Burn Deaf to our Prayers Century Media So what’s wrong with Deaf to Our Prayers? It’s got good production, really good musicianship, and the songs are well written. So what’s my problem? Why don’t I like them, God!? Hmm. God must be deaf to my prayers. I think I’m just so jaded when it comes to European metal... Well, I’m just jaded, period. But more so when it comes to euro metal. Since I’m so jaded I’m going to use my mangled wreck of a soul as a stool, and look down at the people making/enjoying this style of death hardcore metal. Stop making music that sounds like everyone else. When you heard Arch Enemy or At the Gates for the first time you thought it didn’t sound like anything you had ever heard before. When I listen to Heaven Shall Burn, I know it’s been done a cumillion times and it’s enough, already. Yeah, it’s German and a little bit darker than other Euro metal, but that’s not something that catches my ear. What does catch my ear is the relentless screaming vocals that vary about as much as my cat’s asshole can stretch. Deaf to Our Prayers brings so little to the table that it actually justifies my bitterness with the metal scene. - David Von Bentley

of them. It was a true fuck you to the notion that your hair had to be long and your time between baths longer in order for you to play heavy music. Fourteen years, a couple really stinky albums, and numerous line-up changes later, and Helmet is back with Monochrome, a bit of a return to form for band founder Page Hamilton. Back and as good as on Meantime is the precise, pulverizing guitar tone. And, of course, there’s the ornery vocals. Now I was never a fan of Hamilton’s voice, so the real treat with this release is the incorporation of more vocal melodies to contrast the jagged rhythms behind them. The result is similar to waking the Foo Fighters up with a really bad hangover and a throbbing case of hemorrhoids. - Devon Cody The Hold Steady Boys and Girls in America Vagrant Being the saviours of rocking and rolling is no easy undertaking, just ask the sophomore duds from the Darkness, Andrew W.K, Jet, and the Killers. Oh sure, it’s one thing to have a few riffs in your pocket, but another to know how to execute them and keep your audience interested. Still going strong in round three, Minneapolis natives (now Brooklynites, of course) the Hold Steady continue their mission of taking heartland bar-rock into the souls of cynical urbanites. Piano fills and organ swirls follow meaty, irony-free riffs, while Craig Finn’s throaty sermons on chemical excess and heartbreak in the dead of winter sound like they could have been lifted from a Bukowski anthology. Boys and Girls in America borders on perfection, despite its often singular themes and occasional classic rock clichés. It’s about time a band like this came around to shake things up. - Adam Simpkins Intronaut Void Goodfellow Readers, I avoided reviewing Intronaut because I hate the name. I heard they produce metallic shards of rock ‘n’ or roll awesomeness, and I didn’t still care. “Intronaut” sounds like the technique of introducing yourself by pulling your pants down and doing the Ace Ventura talking ass bit with your pucker in full view of a complete stranger. Was that a good reason not to review this great Mastodon/Neorosis/ Meshuggah etc musical throwdown? I thought it was. I’m so confused. Now I just wanna go back into my closet and listen to “A Monolithic Vulgarity” or “Fault Lines” or “Nostalgic Echo” or fuck… all of Void is great. Intronaut creates atmosphere, brutality and groovtonics with dizzying, closet-vacating skill. One of the best of the year. - David Von Bentley Jakalope Born 4 Orange There are 38 people in this band. Dave Ogilvi, who has worked with some of the biggest names in the ‘90s industrial scene including Nine Inch Nails, Skinny Puppy and Marylin Manson, decided he wanted to work with everyone again under one all-inclusive banner. This album is shit. I love industrial and I have no idea how so many good names can be attached to this thing. It’s the slightly goth cousin of shitty girl vocal pop. - Dale DeRuiter The Jon Cohen Experimental s/t Independent Based out of Montreal, the JCE is led by former Dears guitarist Jon Cohen (also of the lawsuit eluding Launie Anderssohn) and features three other members that have probably played in other bands at one point in their lives. As its name suggests, this selftitled debut has “experimental” leanings, but its nine songs are predominately rooted in atmospheric pop foundations. A lot of the material here sounds like the output of four potheads wandering around a field of green haze, like a hybrid of Pink Floyd and the Bonnaroo-baiting side of Ween (that is, more “Demon Sweat” than “Bananas and Blow”). And while some tracks drift a little too far off shore, the majority of the album is surprisingly engaging and thoroughly enjoyable. - Adam Simpkins

ALBUM

Bobnoxious Rockaholics Wannabe I think you’re supposed to get drunk while you listen to this album. You’re led to believe that the album is some sort of game, and you’re supposed to drink to every song, either a beer or a shot. It actually sounds like Andrew WK mixed with Danko Jones with some ‘70s guitar in there for good measure. It may be slowed down a bit but this is unapologetic party music. So let go of some inhibitions and rock out with your cock out. - Dale DeRuiter Bright Eyes Noise Floor Saddle Creek Ebay capitalists are likely sniveling in their little caves because of the new Bright Eyes collection, Noise Floor. No longer will they be able to fetch major cash from some pimpled teenager for a copy of the Bright Eyes/Album

The Deadcats Feline 500 Flying Saucer Just when you thought they were really dead,

The Nerve November 2006 Page 22

Five Horse Johnson The Mystery Spot

Helmet Monochrome Warcon As far as suburbia-friendly agro-intelli-metal goes, many will argue that Helmet is among the underrated elite. The 1992 slab Meantime provided a neat alternative to the more abrasive likes of Pantera or the head-banging standard-bearers like Metallica. Here were four scrawny frat boy-looking schmucks that could slug out bone crushing riffs with the best

Jucifer If Thine Enemy Hunger Relapse I love Relapse Records. They invest in bands that only a small segment of the population can really like and let them develop. So whenever I receive a CD from Relapse Records, I try to make an effort to listen and enjoy it. With

MUSICCONTENTS REVIEWS Jucifer I listened to it and, well... I can’t say I enjoyed it. Actually, I have to say that it gave me a savage, pulsating headache that could only be cured by a gentle coconut oil rubdown from a barely legal island girl. But like I said, being a Relapse record, If Thine Enemy Hunger is for a certain small segment of the population - aka not for me - but maybe you. The band is actually a duo consisting of Amber Valentine on guitar and vocals, with Edgar Livengood banging away on the drums. The guitars are sludgy, the drums are basic, and the vocals are very... girly alternative? Does that sound right? How about Veruca Saltish? Yeah, that’s better. “She Tides the Deep” comes in with a lengthy doom metal chug for almost eight minutes and “Lucky Ones Burn” is reminiscent of early ‘90s Seattle Flannel. Jucifer skips through genres with ease, but maintains the sludge and fuzz rather naturally. It’s not my thing, but if you’re into girls singing about getting their periods under a doom metal beat, then go for it. - Dave Von Bentley Lefty McRighty and the Boxcar Cadavers s/t Independent The bastard love children of David Allen Coe topped like a delicious sundae with Cash/ Haggard/Jennings… this Ottawa band keeps it simple and actually recorded this album in the same room at the same time (who the fuck does that these days?). Approaching country/ rockabilly from more of a Tennessee Two vs last call perspective, they sound like a Legion party band from the mid-70s. One that was raised on Stompin’ Tom and who might have a few Ramones 8-tracks in their Chevy Malibu. Standout tracks include “Help Me See The Light” and the Commander Cody-like “Spare An Extra Liver”! - Boy Howdy The Lemonheads s/t Vagrant Please don’t call it a comeback, Evan Dando has been here for years – popping up periodically and releasing a couple of solo albums since the last Lemonheads fulllength over a decade ago. And never having permanent band members anyway, it didn’t take much to get the group back together. This time around a couple of Descendents handle the rhythm section and even J Mascis gets his chops out for a few tracks. The album was intended to sound pre-Shame About Ray, which it does, but that’s not necessarily a real selling point. The first few Lemonheads records had their moments, but Dando’s songwriting prowess didn’t peak until a few years later. Regardless, “Pittsburgh” and “Poughkeepsie” represent the typical catchy/nonsensical charm that the ‘heads are best known for and there are enough gems scattered around that old and new fans alike will find something sweet to suck on. - Adam Simpkins Make Believe Of Course Flameshovel/Polyvinyl Make Believe’s drummer, Nate Kinsella, probably never thought he would end up spending two month of his life in jail for dropping his shorts at a Christian rock show. But that’s exactly what happened to him. So before he had to start using cigarettes as currency, his band dragged him into the studio to get his mind off things. The result is Of Course, where this band of Joan of Arc members has decided to somewhat up the pop quotient on its screamy art punk. The band layers songs like “Anything…Selling That Thing” and “Bisect Duality” with some rather catchy hooks and melodies this time, making Of Course a bit closer to their previous Owls project. However, Tim Kinsella’s vocal chords sound more damaged than ever, and the band still throws in a fair amount of abrasiveness. This album definitely holds its own amongst the ever-growing number of releases by the Joan of Arc family. - BRock Thiessen

record. “Dead Girl” and “Stitches” stand out specifically. These guys need to concentrate on building the confidence to lay it all out on the line when recording. If they can do that, look out. Obvious Misfits fans, the Massacres - unlike Glenn Danzig - should only get better with age. - Devon Cody Million Dollar Marxists Zero Culture Stumble Twenty years from now, kids are going to be playing their parent’s Million Dollar Marxists albums and wondering why they weren’t bigger than AFI for gawdsakes. The answer is simple: the Million Dollar Marxists are not following any trends and do not fit neatly into the current rock demographic. They simply make the most damaging punk/ rock/garage albums they can, paying no attention to what everyone else is doing. This time around, the Marxists are darker, more intense, and it’s almost as if they realize that they will never be appreciated by today’s scenesters. The music is an angry maelstrom that swirls from the speakers and destroys everything in its path. The trademark power and energy is still there, but this time they are pissed off and it shows. Do yourself a favour and don’t wait 20 years to find out what this amazing band is about. I’d hate to be the guy who said, “I told you so.” - Chris Walter The Mooney Suzuki The Maximum Black EP V2 This EP is absolutely essential for any fan of New York retro rock quartet the Mooney Suzuki, and a serious point of note for any fan of the genre. Recorded and pressed on their own dime some two years before the Strokes debuted, the original six track Black EP contains the sounds and, more importantly, the passion of a group of young men believing in the power of rock, and not merely feigning it just to look cool. In fact, it was this zeal and EP that got them signed and rolling. For the sake of history, five tracks from the recording sessions that spawned the original have been added, shedding light on the mod roots that earned them their early live success at Coney Island High (RIP). It’s kinda sad to say, but this truly is the Mooney Suzuki at its best. - Filmore Mescalito Holmes Mothra s/t Independent A lot of dorks have been blathering on about how great this art/math/noise rock shit is these days. Normally, I get the urge to tie the fuckers down, jab dentist drills in their ears, and spray a big, steamy shwarma shit all over their face just to see if they’d rave about that too. However, if they were talking about Mothra, such compulsions might be held at bay. What sets this apart from the other shit, you ask? Well, first off, the singer, Karla Miller, is hot… not some skinny androgynous jerk with a bad hairdo. There’s no point in getting all negative when I can delude myself into thinking that giving Ms. Miller a good review might somehow up the chance of her playing with my wiener now, is there? Makes for good masturbation scenarios, anyway. Aside from that, I like this because it’s more than just noisy art fag wanking. Moody polyrhythms give way to shrill vocal attacks and soothing sonic waves splooge into primal guitar madness with all the predictability of Courtney Love with a bleeding cunt. So, uhhh, Karla… dinner sometime? Maybe a movie? - Thomas Bitterliver The New Lou Reeds Top Billin’ Exit Stencil Recordings A witty band name can only take you so far in rock ’n’ roll. It can wiggle its way into people’s memories, but if the band doesn’t have the tunes to back it up, it’s not going to stay there. Now whether the name the New Lou Reeds is clever is debatable, but most would agree their second effort, Top Billin’, is a bit up and down. Despite the obvious lack of a recording budget, the New Lou Reeds keep the first half of the album solid. Their country-fried rock and punk is satisfying enough on songs like “Exploit Me” and “Captain America,” but by the time the second half rolls around, the album begins to lag. Littering an album with long-winded blues jams and lame sketches about smoking crack is never a good idea. As a whole, Top Billin’ needs a few more focused rock songs to be totally worthwhile. - BRock Thiessen

Drag City You gotta give California’s Joanna Newsome credit; indie rock has never heard music like this before. Taking her waifish vocals and classically trained harp to the next level, Ys’ five tracks follow Newsome’s renaissance storytelling lyricism over 55 minutes, punctuated withorchestrations courtesy of Van Dyke Parks. Obviously, the album is meant to be listened to from start to finish, but that can be a daunting task for those who aren’t wholly enraptured by Newsome’s occasionally squeaky voice. You will either love her or hate her. Not much call for a less psychotic Björk for Steve Albini fans, but those people are blessed by this. - Filmore Mescalito Holmes Octoberman Laguardia White Whale Octoberman’s second wonderful White Whale release of 2006 showcases yet more of Marc Morrisette’s compelling urban ballads of rainswept love and windblown loss. Recorded live (and solo this time, as opposed to Octoberman’s usual lush, fleshed-out fullband approach) with crisp production (mostly thanks to James Henderson), there’s a sparse, lulling vibe at work here on this rootsy sevensong EP (reminiscent of Rick Rubin’s American Recordings series), although Morrisette’s voice sounds more like Gordon Gano than Tom Petty or Herr Zimmerman - a good thing. Highlights include the title track (where one is treated to the lovely harmony vocals of L. Abramson and Sean Conway’s mandolin), “Cisco Kid,” a reworking of Octoberman’s earlier tune “X-Pat,” and basically the whole damn EP, beginning to end. Released in advance of Octoberman’s upcoming solo tour of Europe, Laguardia is yet another happy checkmark on the massive list of amazing Vancouver recordings. Go get ‘em, Marc. - Ferdy Belland The Orchid Highway s/t Independent The Orchid Highway is one of Vancouver’s longest-running bands, and their dogged diehard attitude is more than justified by the quality of the music they write. Trousers-deep in a rapturously ongoing obsession with mid60s Britpop and psychedelia, the 10 songs on their self-titled debut (stunningly recorded in lush psycho-stereo by engineering wizard Steven Drake at Greenhouse Studios) contain imaginatively melodic arrangements that would knock Brian Wilson out of his housecoat and on his fat ass in his piano-equipped sandbox (and resurrect poor old Syd Barrett from the acid-casualty dead while they were at it). The Orchid Highway finally have a strong record to be forever proud of. Now all they need is to parachute this record by the thousandfold into the hearts and minds and ears and stereos of the nation’s vast power-pop audience. Vancouver needs a Sloan of its West Coast own, and with this record, we now have one. - Ferdy Belland Petra Jean Phillipson Notes On: Love Gronland Petra Jean Phillipson is notorious so far for being a vocalist on David Holmes’ Presents the Free Association, (most notably her performance on “Sugar Man”) however, her debut fulllength release couldn’t be further from his live garage sound. This is very much a studio production. Borrowing extensively from Billy Holliday and PJ Harvey (indeed Notes On: Love could believably have been Polly’s follow up to To Bring You My Love), Philippson is talented without being original. Her vocals alternately mimic Martina Topley-Bird (she has, in the past, provided backing vocals for her), Harvey, and Beth Orton and while impressions are fun, they distract from the songs. What makes this album clever is the production (Simon Tong) as dull songs are transformed, Portishead-style, into landscapes of interesting sounds. A cover of Nick Cave’s “Into My Arms” is the most left alone track, effects-wise. Her day job is conservator at St. Paul’s Cathedral. Perhaps best not give it up. - Stephanie Heney

Detroit techno sounds hammer home the fact Plus Device ain’t talking about no Disney® kinda loving. Surely the lyric “come inside of me / time for sodomy” removes all doubt. This may very well be my guilty pleasure of the year. - Filmore Mescalito Holmes Quagmire One for the Ditch Independent Fast and furious punk rock from Winnipeg, Manitoba. Quagmire sing about mental illness, being hungover, killing cops, and drinkin’ too much. They ain’t reinventing the wheel here, but what do you expect from a bunch of Winnipeg punks who barely got their shit together enough to record a CD? I haven’t had a beer in almost six years, but after listening to this I felt like heading down to the local bar to guzzle bourbon. Fave song: ‘Greasin’ Pigs.’ Best song title: ‘Jesus Was a Redneck.’ - Chris Walter Samiam Whatever’s Got You Down Hopeless After Samiam released the unexpectedly impressive Astray in 2000, the band quickly shuffled from “where are they now?” to “here there are, now!” However, after a few sips from the golden chalice, the group decided to take an indefinite hiatus – leaving a trail of thirsty emo kids in its wake. But after a handful of successful European shows, the band reformed (somewhat, guitarist James Brogan bowed out) and scrounged together the tracks that make up Whatever’s Got You Down. While it isn’t a complete disaster, album number seven takes a few unfortunate steps backward. Vocalist Jason Beebout is still moaning about failed relationships while his weathered voice signals that it may be time to switch gears and find some new friends. And a little more time could have been spent on production: vocals are unnecessarily washed out over flurries of guitars leaving a sizeable chunk of the tracks here sounding rushed and uncared for. Bonus points for perseverance, though. - Adam Simpkins The Shanks The Valley of the Shadow of… Head on a Plate The Shanks play mid-tempo, garage rock/pop which wouldn’t have sounded out of place back in the mid ‘90s when bands like Local H and Imperial Teen were making small ripples in Rock Pond, USA. Hailing from the wee township of Mono – somewhere in Southern Ontario – Pistolwhip von Shankenstein (vocals/ bass guitar) and Furious Homecooked (drums) create relatively full-sounding songs with their limited gear. Spitting out distorted, occasionally aloof vocals á la Julian Casablancas, in front of thick bass-lines and driving beats, the Shanks create some memorable hooks but for the most part run into that “didn’t we just hear that song” trap. Even so, this is only the band’s second limited released EP – bigger things are bound to follow. - Adam Simpkins Siege Drop Dead Deranged I vaguely recall Siege from the murky past, but wasn’t aware that it was cited by Napalm Death as a primary influence. Sure as shit, this is as intensely fast and extremely chaotic, as you’d expect from the band responsible for “grindcore” to be. If you like machinegun guitars, throat-shredding vocals, and insanely fast drums, then Siege is for you. It makes Discharge seem almost mild and slow in comparison. Get the picture yet? Good. - Chris Walter

“Electrofonic Tonic” that have only ever been familiar to bootleg-buying geeks like me and a bunch of Australian longhairs who named their bands after them. That probably won’t change with this release since the casual listener isn’t likely to be tempted by six discs worth of (generally pretty great quality, soundwise) odds and sods but... if you’re a fan of that Motor city sound, you’ll find plenty to blow your Real O-Mind here, and it does include the studio recording of “City Slang”, which is about six minutes of the best defense for air guitar ever. - Andrew Molloy The Sound Bluntz Blame The Bling Awesome Music No joke, this album is actually released by a duo called the Sound Bluntz, it’s really called Blame The Bling and, not only that, it’s put out by some label called “Awesome Music”. That’s more red flags than an army of menstruating abdicators! I must question if any of the people involved with this product have actually read The Nerve. But whatever, you know what they say about “any press”. This album is designed for the weekend warriors: indifferent club-goers trapped in the world of nine-tofive existence, those whose knowledge of electronic music goes no further than some perfunctory Justin Timberlake remix spun by their favourite DJ of whatever godforsaken Granville nightclub the kids frequent these days. But just what is Blame The Bling, you say? Eleven tracks of highly recognizable and dated dance-floor jams (“Billie Jean”, “Just What I Needed”, “Bust A Move”) backed by rudimentary house beats and basic filtering that could have been pulled off by any clown after a few hours of disk jockeying school. Yet somehow Sound Bluntz (DJ Swet and DJ Lil’ Pete, word) have earned two backto-back “best dance recording” Junos for their records (keep in mind that BKS, Love, Inc. and Delerium have also taken home this worthless accolade). Sorry Richie Hawtin, Tiga, Chromeo, every artist on Wagon Repair (you get the point), your science just ain’t tight enough! When a group like this makes MSTRKRFT sound like geniuses, it’s definitely cause for alarm. - Adam Simpkins Erol Sora Demented Honour Duration I like Midnight Dragon. They play a stormin’ brand of hedonistic throwback rock, moustache-approved, with a flashy snortinblow-from-a-hooker’s-naval arena rock posture. While three of four Dragons are Lizzy-addicted riff-fuelled groovers, the last is a ridiculous torpedo soloist from How-to-Shred College. That dude is Erol Sora. Demented Honour (powerful title!) is Sora’s magnum CD opus, produced by Dragon drummer Jay Solyom (the most inspiring and unceasingly surprising mid-paced 4/4 rock drummer around, incidentally). Jay’s got a gifted ear - check his work with the Manvils - which is sort of sympathetic to Sora’s onslaught of forgettable would-be ‘80s radio rock relics, performed with expected competency and surprisingly little wank. Song titles include “Highway to Nowhere” and “If You Ever Need Love”, are in the four-five minute range, and conclude with fade-outs... I heard that at the Ian Gillan show (where Midnight Dragon opened), Sora went down like a fuckin’ Abomb from Planet Riff with the fanny-pack crowd. - Dave Bertrand Square Root of Margaret Cloud Nine Revisited 33 1/3 RPM Canadian power-pop ate up a good quarter of my CD collection in the mid-90s. I enjoyed how bands like the Inbreds and the Super Friendz typically weren’t as fey and jangly as their British counterparts, but they weren’t as gritty as the Americans, lying somewhere in between, and exerting this great balance over everything. Now in 2006, Square Root of Margaret is another band that fits the mold of north-of-the-border pop I used to hold so dear. On their debut, Cloud Nine Revisited, this Ontario band picks up cues from veteran popsters like Teenage Fanclub but also contemporary bands like Of Montreal and the Shins. The result is a shiny adventure in pop, where songs like “I Don’t Know Why” and “Time Machine” sound like what CanCon is supposed to turn into hits. Overall, the album fills me with nostalgia but is still modern enough to please my critical ears. - BRock Thiessen

REVIEWS

The Massacres Season of the Scarecrow Flying Saucer The Massacres are one of those bands that I imagine are at their best about eight beers in. Having said that, I get the impression that these guys hit the studio very sober when they recorded Season of the Scarecrow. There are hints of promise, but it never quite sheds the restrained sound of a young, slightly selfconscious band in the confines of the studio as opposed to the freedom of the stage. The production is a little on the muddy side too. It does grow on you however. Several listens quashed my initial indifference toward the

Joanna Newsome Ys

Plus Device Puncture Hefty Who Plus Device is isn’t nearly as important as the quality of the music it/they make. The cover art, featuring a curvaceous woman clad in black lingerie against an equally dark backdrop, perfectly fits the mysterious duo’s infectiously sexed up, ‘80s tinged electro-funk. All vocals and most track names have explicitly erogenic implications, while the German/

Sonic’s Rendezvous Band Sonic’s Rendezvous Band Box Set Easy Action How many bands out there officially released but one song - the same tune, the monster “City Slang”, on both sides of a single - during the five plus years they were an active band, only to eventually see a six-disc box set of live/demo recordings surface to fill in the gaps (rhetorical question)? Such are the times we live in and, in this case, that’s a very good thing ‘cos this was a smokin’ band. Consisting of Fred ‘Sonic’ Smith of the MC5 on guitar and vocals, ex-Stooge Scott Asheton on traps, Gary Rasmussen of the Up on bass and Scott Morgan of the underrated Rationals on guitar and vocals, the SRB were certainly a “supergroup” if you’re into that kind of terminology. Smith’s songwriting and axework are exemplary as you’d expect, but Morgan, who shares the load, is every bit his equal with great tunes like “Asteroid B-612” and

Street Dogs Fading American Dream

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CONTENTS DRT This is one of those albums that I liked from the opening chords. The frontman for the Street Dogs helped form the Dropkick Murphys and DKM went to hell after he left, in my humble opinion. The “Boston sound” is still here, with the Celtic instruments and all, but the guitars and drums are the meat and potatoes. And a hearty stew it is; anthemic sing-a-longs, rousing choruses, and all the other stuff you expect from a good streetrock band. The biggest difference is that this guy can actually sing, unlike Al Barr from the Dropkicks who merely bellows. The Street Dogs have been around and have learned the importance of keeping it simple, not bogged down with gimmicks. Methinks this will get much rotation on the ol’ CD player. - Chris Walter Suburban Lockdown Locked In Steelcap Angry streetpunk with plenty of attitude and just the right amount of snottiness. I wanna know where Suburban Lockdown was when I suffered at the hands of those obnoxious hair bands in the late ‘80s, when even the Exploited had gone metal. Oh, that’s right; they were still getting beat up in grade school, which is a fucking pity because I could have used some of this back then. Suburban Lockdown: the perfect antidote to Whitesnake. - Chris Walter Sub Rosa Slings & Arrows Blue Rose Sub Rosa boasts that its debut album was made “without the benefit of producers, engineers or even a recording studio.” How very subversive! Sock it to the Man! However, it is possible, upon listening to Slings & Arrows, to assume that such defiance isn’t a conscious strike against the evil engine that is the record industry, but more the result of not being able to get signed because it’s not very good. At best, this is grown up coffee table music for dinner parties and people who take themselves too seriously. The tone is very sombre, and at times recalls early New Order (except not as good) and Cocteau Twins (except with proper words) and the vocals are Nico on a bad day. Sub Rosa compares itself to Nick Drake, but I doubt anyone else will. This is so plain you actually forget you’re listening to a CD at times, and think about maybe putting one on. - Stephanie Heney Swollen Members Black Magic Battle Axe Yay, Moka Only, Madchild, and that other guy are back with a whole new album. Oh boy these guys look so tough in the liner notes - I best be not fuckin wit dem. Now we can all listen to some dumb shits tell us their stories about how they know so and so from this band. Why does anyone give a shit about Swollen Members? To be fair, I did try to listen to the album and the only thing I can say is these guys are about a millimeter less annoying than Black Eyed Peas. The music samples are too repetitive for me to handle. It’s like somebody barfed circus music and talked over it. - Dale DeRuiter Unearth III: In the Eyes of Fire Metal Blade Unearth doesn’t make bad records, but they don’t make good ones either. As far as American styled Gothenburg metal goes, Unearth has some talent, but nothing pokes my ass as original, grooving, or boner inducing. All of the songs seem to blend together into yelling, polyrhythmic breakdowns, and down-tuned Iron Maiden riffs. I swear if you took the breaks in between songs away, you wouldn’t know when “Giles” ends and the “March of the Mutes” begins. I really wanted to like this album since Terry Date (Pantera, Soundgarden) produced, but sadly, thanks to

Terry, mediocrity has never sounded so crystal clear. I did find some pleasure in the poor choice of song titles, at least. “The Devil has Risen”, “Impostors Kingdom”, and “Big Bear and the Hour of Chaos” are fantastic titles to laugh at, or you can actually take the back cover off and just wipe your ass with it. - David Von Bentley V/A Girl Monster Chicks On Speed It’s hard to believe, but this 61 track “triple CD guide through the real history of women’s cutting edge music” is only volume one in a planned series. More power to them, though, because, for a compilation that contains two-thirds previously unreleased material, there is surprisingly little filler. Girl Monster has a little of everything from the ‘70s (the Slits, Delta 5) to now (Björk, Kevin Blechdom) but focuses most strongly on the female impact on electronica, punk, and various combinations of the two. I’ve always loved women, but now I’m in love with them. This is the real girl power. - Filmore Mescalito Holmes V/A What the Shite - Shits ‘n’ Onions Vol 2 Ominum How very odd that I should wake up with a hankering for rowdy Celtic drinking music and this should arrive for my review. For the record, Shits ‘n’ Onions Vol 2 is a compilation of bands who favour mandolins, ten-penny whistles, and plenty of scotch and ale. The Blaggards open up with perhaps the best version of “Drunken Sailor” that I’ve ever heard, and the CD continues on in much the same tradition. The volume levels are a little uneven from song to song, but I’ll forgive the engineer if he had a wee bit too much to drink. Shits ‘n’ Onions claims to be for fans of Dropkick Murphys and Flogging Molly, but this is a bit more traditional than those groups, which is fine with me. Quite a few good bands here, but the ones who stood out for me were the Kissers, the Blaggards, Mutiny, Icewagon Flu, Warblefly, Three Day Threshold, the Gobshites; aw hell, they’re all plenty lively and full of piss. Just what the doctor ordered. - Chris Walter Warpig s/t Relapse Fans of Cream and Deep Purple ought to suck someone at Relapse Records dick for re-releasing this obscure Canadian gem from the ‘70s. This band is a prime example that there is absolutely no justice in the music business. In a better world the guys in Warpig wouldn’t have had to abandon their musical aspirations for careers as district sales managers. Fortunately, this re-release has served to reunite the original band members and sparked hopes that the old farts might make some new music. For now, take a step back in time and dig on Warpig. Best served with stinky reefer and stubby beers. This band is bound to bring out the moustache within. - Devon Cody The Whiskey Jacks s/t Independent Seven songs of shit-kickin’ bluegrass from one of the city’s most underrated bands. Fun times and authentic mandolin-banjo-double bass-harp crusty-core hobo action! Opener “You Ain’t Talkin’ To Me” sets the table for the cocaine, dustbowl hoarseness of “Farmer’s Blues”. The banjo playin’ on this fucker is killer. The sounds are all tight and the songs well arranged and crafted. Try to keep still while listening to the closer, “Minimum Wage”! This cd is a party waiting to happen… do yourself a favour and get out to see these guys when they roll into a local drinkin’ establishment like five tumbling tumbleweeds all full of piss ‘n’ vinegar and ready to mow your fucking lawn! - Boy Howdy

WORST CD OF THE MONTH Mariana’s Trench Fix Me 604 You’ve got to hand it to Chad “Kroeger” Turton (of the Hanna AB Turtons). Not only does he have the streak of the unmitigated chickenshit when it comes to dodging his court appearance for being stupid enough to be busted driving drunk in Surrey (you can take the boy out of Alberta, but you’ll never take the Alberta out of the boy), but you realize just how truly terrified he is of the unstoppable rush of the impending collapse of his bloated career as rock star / industry mogul when he attempts to broaden 604 Records’ stable with the prefabricated pseudo-indie-rock bullshit that is and always will be Mariana’s Trench. Actually listening to the album is a moot point. An idle flipping through the liner notes of their latest shitfest Fix Me proves everything I’m saying to you. The cover art is a picture of a battered first-aid kit...OOOOH! Such conceptual depth already!

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Inner imagery of red crosses, scalpels and forceps, and band photos given the X-Ray effect. JESUS! HOLY FUCK, I’M SO ENGROSSED! FIX ME! FIX ME! FIX ME, TURTON! The central band shot shows three aging Burnaby mallrats looking confused behind a pouting fop who really thinks he’s pulling off a modern-day Ziggy Stardust - when in fact he just looks like he’s dolling himself up for a big night out at the Dufferin. And then there’s the actual music itself: sheep in wolf’s clothing. These guys are trying so hard to please Chad Turton’s lawyer with derivate, unconvincing mishmashes of untuned guitar ramblings they hope come across to the indiscriminate CD-buyer as ‘indie hip,’ when in fact it’s the same old misogynistic whining you hear from any of the CFOX-soundalike bands on 604. This is how you remind me of what you really are: bullshit. - Johnny Kroll

CONTENTS

WHO SHOT G.W.? The Nerve Interview with Death of a President’s Gabriel Range

By Michael Mann

nless you’ve been living in an extremely well insulated box, you’ve probably heard the buzz about Gabriel Range’s film Death of a President. Essentially a made-for-TV movie in the UK, the film has garnered such a colossal amount of hype it received a North American theatrical release. The premise is brilliant but simple and a lot of people are probably kicking themselves for not thinking of it first. Assuming the form of a documentary, Range deftly weaves existing and original footage to create a film about the assassination of George W. Bush in 2007. The film takes us up to the President’s assassination then examines the fallout from the audacious “what if” scenario. DOAP has generated liberal talking points as well as conservative talking points. Hillary Clinton has blasted him, as has Rush Limbaugh. Large theatrical distribution chains are refusing to carry the movie and people involved with the film have received numerous threats, both financial and physical. But rather than delivering a blood-soaked Bush-bashing extravaganza some were expecting, viewers will see something that could be harder for some to stomach than the depiction of the sitting President’s murder. Rather than take the easy road and vilify George Bush, it presents him as a likable and sympathetic human being who’s been forced to play with the worst poker hand anyone has ever been dealt in time immemorial. I had a chance to sit down with Gabriel Range to try and find out why America hates him so much. Nerve: So Gabriel, how is infamy working out for you? Gabriel Range: How is infamy working out? Well, it’s very strange. I always knew that the film would be provocative. I always knew that it would get some people upset. I guess I didn’t bank on upsetting quite as many people. I think the provocation is justified. Sometimes film should be outrageous. If a film doesn’t offend some people then it’s not doing enough. So I’m happy that people are talking about the film. Nerve: Have you received any threats? Gabriel Range: There were a handful of threats made to me—a few of them were death threats to me and

I think Karen, the festival director [at the Toronto International Film Festival] got one too. But again, that initial knee jerk reaction came at a time when people didn’t know anything about the film other than it portrayed the assassination of George Bush. People imagined it would be this liberal fantasy, some sort of wet dream. Nerve: “Liberal porn” is the term I’ve seen used. Gabriel Range: Right, that it was this sort of bloodletting where people would be dancing up and down the aisles in great delight at seeing President Bush being shot. Anyone who goes to the cinema with the sole expectation of having this great cathartic moment in seeing President Bush being shot will be disappointed. It’s not what you think.You have to

some people for whom just the idea is too much. But I think they are the minority. I think most people will want to have a look beyond the controversy and have a look at what this film really is. The film, I hope, poses some serious questions on how the war on terror has been prosecuted in the last five years. It poses some really serious questions about the polarizing effect of the invasion of Iraq. These are all things we need to be thinking about and we have good reason to be alarmed by some of things that have happened. Nerve: Do you enjoy the stir you’ve created? Gabriel Range: I enjoy the fact that people are talking about the film. This was not the purpose of making a film about the assassination of Bush as a starting

I always knew that the film would be provocative. I always knew that it would get some people upset.... Sometimes film should be outrageous. If a film doesn’t offend some people then it’s not doing enough. judge the film for yourself. Nerve: One person in particular who blasted you was Hillary Clinton. She said you’re despicable and you make her sick. She could be the future leader of the free world.That’s pretty heavy. Gabriel Range: Well I think it’s terrifying. How can she say a film she has not seen is despicable? That doesn’t bode very well. On that basis, she could invade a country without looking at the intelligence dossier. It’s not very reassuring. Nerve: What has the right’s reaction been? Gabriel Range: It’s difficult to say… In America, I don’t think I have a lot of fans on the Rush Limbaugh show. There are plenty of people who were very quick to condemn the film. Of course, there are

point. It was not about taking the assassination as a form of entertainment. The intention of the film, I hope, is to pose some serious questions about the climate of fear we live in. There’s the political, social and counter-cultural consequences of this fear we all live in. 9/11 obviously changed the world in so many ways. It has meant that there is a component of fear in the way so many things are handled that just wasn’t there before 9/11. I do think that these are extraordinary times that we live in and I think they’re noteworthy. I guess, for America, there has never been a time like it. In Europe in the late 60s and early 70s, terrorism was very much on everyone’s agenda. Whether it was Northern Ireland or Algerian terrorism in France. For America,

this is a unique time. Nerve: So in 2007 the war in Iraq is still going on and there’s still an ongoing nuclear threat from North Korea. I guess these problems aren’t getting solved any time soon? Gabriel Range: I think you’re right. It’s pretty hard to imagine Iraq turning into a garden of Eden in the next year. If only. One of the problems with making a film that is set in the near future is you’re offering hostages to fortune in the sense that world events could take a completely different turn to the one you’re anticipating. One of things that was reassuring was on the day the film first came out in the UK North Korea announced it had successfully completed its first nuclear test. There was President Bush making very similar statements to the ones he makes in the film which is, of course, a speech from 2003. So we’re getting some things right. Nerve: At any point while you were making this movie did you have any ethical dilemmas? Gabriel Range: I think the way the assassination was portrayed… it was very important to get that right. It was very important that it was incontrovertibly Bush who was shot. But at the same time, it was very important that it didn’t feel like we were dwelling on the assassination. Of course, you have to think about the ethics of a) portraying the assassination itself and b) putting President Bush’s face on another actor. So yeah, an awful lot of thought went into pretty much every element. One of the things, from an ethical point of view, that I think makes the film very easy to defend is, although it’s fiction, pretty much every twist and turn in the narrative is inspired by true story… it’s a patchwork of little anecdotes from the war on terror. Nerve:The eulogy that Dick Cheney delivers for Bush in the film was actually footage of Cheney delivering a eulogy at Reagan’s funeral. Is that in poor taste? Like there’s the ethics behind the premise and then there’s also the ethics in how you pull that off. Gabriel Range: First of all, were President Bush to be assassinated, God forbid, the state funeral that’s described in the film is absolutely in character for the event that would take place. I think it’s

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CONTENTS

FILM appropriate. The remarks that Dick Cheney made at Ronald Reagan’s funeral are absolutely the kind of things Dick Cheney would say were the president to be assassinated; they are also things which he has separately said about President Bush anyways. That he’s a strong man of moral character, that he’s come along at a time when America most needed him, that he’s a simple man who trusts in God’s purposes. He’s said that word for word anyways. I think it’s entirely in character and I think it’s appropriate. I also think it was done sensitively. Nerve: So Bush is a public figure and that’s what makes this movie fair comment? Gabriel Range:Yeah. Nerve: Well what about his friends and family? Is it fair to them? Gabriel Range: Well it’s obviously going to be a sensitive subject for the Bush family. I appreciate that. I again, would not want to cause any offence or distress for the Bush family with this film. But he’s a public figure and the film is not a personal attack on him. I think it’s justified. Nerve: Do you think that because Bush being assassinated is easily imaginable is the reason why this movie has gotten under people’s skin so much? Say 9/11 never happened, Iraq never happened, Bush has a 60 percent approval rating and you make this movie. It probably wouldn’t be as offensive. Gabriel Range: I personally do not think that it’s likely that there would be an attempt on President Bush’s life. I would think the Secret Service would concur in saying that it’s extremely unlikely that anyone would be successful in such an attempt. Were the President to have a 60 percent approval rating and were to have been no 9/11… actually not even that. Were the administration’s responses not to have invaded Iraq or try to connect 9/11 to Iraq, I wouldn’t have made this film and President Bush’s approval rating wouldn’t be where it is. Nerve: You seem like a pretty mild-mannered guy who isn’t all “Rah Rah Rah, I hate America and George Bush so …” Gabriel Range: On the contrary Nerve: So you do hate America and George Bush?

Gabriel Range: No, no, no. I love America. I’m pretty passionate about America. There’s been a suggestion that it’s anti-American and unpatriotic to make this film. Obviously, patriotism doesn’t really apply because I’m not an American citizen. But I mean, the defining characteristic of America is that it is a democracy. Isn’t one of the most important facets of a democracy is that you should be able to criticize your elected leaders? Nerve: Well if it’s not America bashing, what is your intent behind the film? Gabriel Range: I’ve been really alarmed by the way in which the war on terror has been prosecuted. The attempt to link 9/11 with Saddam Hussein and to use that as the initial pretext for the invasion of Iraq followed by the notion that Saddam Hussein was

film is in no way didactic. It’s not preaching, I hope. It’s not some sort of rant. President Bush and Tony Blair are very keen to take every opportunity to remind us that we’re in this war on terror together. So, although 9/11 was an attack on American soil and the architects of the war on terror were very much American, the consequences of that have been absolutely global. There are British troops in the Middle East and there are Canadian troops in Afghanistan. The war on terror genuinely affects us all. So I think it’s entirely legitimate for me as a Brit to make this film as it would be a Canadian or an American. The practical reality is, when you look at the reaction the film in the news it makes it very clear that from a corporate political view, it’d be impossible for an American company to make

Rush Limbaugh, actually no I take that back, somebody said that I was a sick limey faggot for making this film. I have no idea how making a film about the assassination of President Bush is a comment on your own sexuality. somehow posing a direct threat to America; those falsehoods have caused an extraordinary amount of pain and grief and loss of life. This provides an oblique take on that. Those are really serious issues. One of the extraordinary things is, even after that suggestion had been out there in the public arena, President Bush was re-elected in 2004. Nerve: Another term I’ve seen thrown around to describe this film Euro-arrogance. So you’re from the UK, is it your place to make this film? And is that another reason why people are angry about this film? Gabriel Range: I think it probably is. First of all, the

this film. I’m sure there are plenty of American filmmakers who might have thought about making this film, but I don’t think they’d have had the opportunity to make it in America. Nerve: So I have a few quotes I dug up and I want you to comment on them. First one, “If this movie ever shows in the USA, only LIBERALS will attend.They’ll CHEER and give a STANDING OVATION when Bush gets whacked. Bank on it. It’ll have Chomsky-a-likes Pee-Wee Hermaning in theaters across the land.” Gabriel Range: First of all, I would say that critics who have seen the film say they find the

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CONTENTS

DVD REVIEWS

The Pixies Live at the Paradise in Boston DVD Club Date / Eagle Vision Now here’s a cool little number for above-board Pixies fans and those who haven’t yet fleshed out their inner Pixies fetish.You all know who the Pixies are. One of the more influential American bands to emerge from the electric underground scene of 1980s Boston (which also hatched folks like Mission of Burma, the Del Fuegos, Throwing Muses, and the Lemonheads) the Pixies struggled through indifference, obscurity, and internal hotheadedness before disbanding in 1991 after their fourth album, right before the so-called “alternative rock revolution”. Subsequent lip service from Kurt Cobain (whose songwriting style owed a huge debt to Black Francis and co.) clued the flannel kids into the Pixies’ coolness, and they then received all sorts of retroactive praise denied them during their band’s lifespan. Alas, it was a case of too little, too

assassination very moving. Actually, one of the things that surprised people is the degree at which George Bush is presented as a human being who’s doing a difficult job. Anyone who is going into the movie expecting to cheer at that moment has a shot coming. The assassination is portrayed as a horrific event with dire consequences. Nerve: “This guy committed a felony with this video.” Gabriel Range: Well, that’s absolutely not the case. The film does not incite anyone to commit this act and I haven’t broken any laws. Nerve: “I’d probably want to beat the crap out of the filmmaker for the insult, shut his free speech pie hole.” Gabriel Range:Yeah, there’s been quite a bit of that. Rush Limbaugh, actually; no I take that back, somebody said that I was a sick limey faggot for making this film. I have no idea how making a film about the assassination of President Bush is a comment on your own sexuality. Nerve: “Ronald Reagan, shot at in 1981 in a homage to Jodie Foster’s performance in the movie Taxi Driver. John Hinckley tried to kill our President. Proof that movies can influence violence. Gabriel Range: It is proof that movies can influence violence. The person who wrote that should be directing their ire at The Sentinel, which opened with the footage of the Reagan assassination attempt. There are countless films out there right now that do far more to glamourize violence. The assassination is portrayed as a horrific event with terrible, terrible consequences. I genuinely believe that no one could see this film and be inspired to kill the president. Nerve: Finally, has the attention that this film has brought you allowed you to sleep with anyone famous yet? Gabriel Range: No, absolutely not. Sorry. I regret to inform you that it hasn’t. Nerve: So I guess Hillary Clinton won’t be calling you any time soon? Gabriel Range: I’m sure we’ll have a hot date soon.

late. That is, until they finally reunited in 2004 and kicked serious ass all over again. Live at the Paradise in Boston is just that - the venerable yet spunky Pixies taking the stage at one of the many intimate Boston clubs where they cut their teeth, rolling out an enjoyable 30-song set (including favorites like “Where Is My Mind?,” “Monkey Gone To Heaven,” “Wave of Mutilation,” “Subbacultcha,” “Broken Face,” “Debaser,” and “Gigantic,” among many, many others) to the delight of the 200 lucky bastards who somehow managed to wrangle tickets for the event. Although the Pixies were notoriously bitchy to each other back in the day, you’d never know it from the warm, kind-hearted onstage rapport evident here. Bassist Kim Deal is ageless, the bald David Lovering’s drumming is propulsive and on-the-money, the balder (and devilishly goateed) Joey Santiago shows off his unique and melodic psychedelic-punk guitar stylings, and the baldest (and bespectacled) Frank Black is back as Black Francis once again, stout yet stately, powerful voice in fine form - and loving his bandmates once again. Things really start to heat up and scream after the tenth song or so, when Black Francis trades his Takamine acoustic for his trademark white Telecaster, and before you know it the show’s over, 110 minutes later. As if that wasn’t awesome enough, the DVD’s bonus feature is video footage of a complete 12-song Pixies set performed in October 1986 at another Boston club (TT the Bear’s). Although the sound quality of these clips are, of course, nowhere near the studio slickness of the Paradise set, it’s exciting and fascinating to watch the achingly young Pixies kick out their jams: a shockingly whip-thin Black Francis looks like goddamned Jonathan Richman, Joey Santiago looks like Lou Diamond Philips with a Brian Setzer coif, and I almost lost my fucking mind. Another thumbsup keeper from Eagle Vision! - Ferdy Belland Rainbow Live in Munich 1977 DVD Eagle Vision A dialogue with my brain. Concerning arena rock blow-outs Rainbow and their pristine live DVD release:

Me: Rainbow? Really? Brain:Yes, Bertrand... you do enjoy this.You have an innate lust for high-energy pomp rock from 196778. It’s not your fault. Some people are born with diabetes. Me: But Ritchie Blackmore... he’s the most arrogant, dour, pompous cunt on Earth. He’s the definitive rock guitar narcissist. Brain: Ah... but here in Munich, Ritchie Blackmore proves his Rock God credentials. So he’s a tyrant? So he hasn’t had a good idea in 30 years? So what? Watch him at his peak.You will never be as good at ANYTHING, Bertrand, not a single thing, as Ritchie Blackmore is at playing guitar. Me: And Cozy Powell? Is he really a better drummer than Sabbath’s Bill Ward? Brain: Technically, yes. He’s got the jazz grip and total precision. But Ward’s drunken cardboard rolls just dig that much deeper into yer crooked soul, much like Burke (Budgie) Shelley’s lo-fi workingman’s riffs, which will ALWAYS tug your loins more than Rainbow’s stagey epic clatter. Me: Is Ronnie James Dio really the cheesiest man alive? Brain:Yes. Me: Does he bear a shocking resemblance to Tiny Tim? But shorter? Brain:Yes. And yes, it can be embarrassing to watch him – despite his molten lungs. Why he has to end off every fucking tune with shitty song-title rhymes (“L.A. Connection”/I can’t take a rejection/Oohh/I need an inspection), I have no idea. That wonderful little idiot. Me: What about bassist Bob Daisley? He’s proto-metal’s best man, and he got the fucking shaft, from Rainbow, from Ozzy, from everyone! (note: according to Daisley, he wrote ALL the lyrics from the first five solo Ozzy albums, uncredited, and in return he was gyped out of 20 years worth of royalties for Blizzard of Ozz and Diary of a Madman

– Ozzy’s best and most eternally popular Randy Rhoads-era albums – before that sleazy whore Sharon Osbourne just up and rerecorded his bass parts with Robert Trujillo in 2001, marketing this embarrassing cop-out as the new ‘official’ version, available today at your favourite retailer.) Brain: Well, Blackmore’s a single-minded megalomaniac. And Sharon Osboune... is a piece of living shit. Ozzy is her obedient puppy. Me: On the mountain of homoerotic ‘70’s hard rock machismo, where sits the Rainbow? Brain: Right at the top! On Look Out Peak! Check out Blackmore’s fucking shirt in the “L.A. Connection” video: open-chested shark-tooth cut, black leather, a corset (swear to God!), and, of course, hot leather ball-huggers... not to mention the giant coloured RAINBOW over the live stage, which left my friend Vince – a local queer - absolutely quivering from its sheer unbridled homosexuality. - Dave Bertrand

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CONTENTS

Drugs are Nice: A Post-Punk Memoir By Lisa Crystal Carver Soft Skull Press Ever read a book by someone who’s lived a really interesting life but decides to bore you with the inane details of her man problems? That’s what Drugs are Nice is. Lisa Crystal Carver — who was in a band I’ve never heard of, Suckdog, and published a magazine I’ve never read, Rollerderby — is really hot shit according to the Utne Reader So This is Readin’? By Tripp Underwood Hopeless I confess that when I saw that this audio book by the Unseen’s Tripp Underwood contained four CDs, I had no intention of listening to them all. Mostly, I just don’t have time for such a thing, not to mention that I thought it would bore me. Surprisingly, Tripp is articulate and funny, with a good sense of timing and pace. The book recounts the inception and career of Massachusetts punk band, the Unseen. Even though I’m not the biggest Unseen fan, (I’m a Darkbuster man) I could not help but chuckle at the trials and tribulations the band endured. From fog machines run amuck to sociopath singers, there are more than enough hilarious tales here to keep even the most attention-deficit punk glued to his er, stereo. Also, I know first hand how hard it is to get punks to read, so making an audio book was probably a brilliant idea. This book is also available in printed form, but of course, the paper book wouldn’t have

which proclaimed her a visionary who will change your life. If you’ll allow me to do the Silence of the Lambs thing with my unit for a second to discuss feminism, ultimately Carver only seems to be able to define herself through her relationships with men. There’s her husband Jean-Louis Costes, a noise musician, with whom she performed allegedly insane rock operas that are never explained in any great detail. There’s Boyd Rice, another noise artist, who was friends with Anton LaVey and inflicted what seems like some pretty tepid psychological abuse on her with a few punches to boot. She also had an almost incestuously close relationship with her dad. There’s also some bizarre shit with GG Allin thrown in there along with a brief stint at a ruband-tug. I guess she was seen as one of the original riot grrrls or something with her magazine but, as someone who’s never heard of her, this book doesn’t give the impression that she’s accomplished much. Admittedly, Carver does drop a few gems like this one on peeing while performing: “I pee in a litter box because I am playing a cat and that’s what cats do. If I were an audience member, I’d like to see pee as part of the show because you know the pee-er isn’t acting peeing. Jean Louis and I both end up naked due to similar theatrical reasoning.” In conclusion, I wanna read about her insane performances, her public defecation and what it¹s like to give a Japanese businessman a handjob in graphic detail. Is it true they have squinty urethras? I don¹t know, Carver doesn¹t tell me and I wish she had. Instead she elects to whine about men for 250 pages. Save that shit for the Dr. Phil show and give me what I want. Thanks for wasting my time, slut. -Michael Mann

the rare versions and classic tracks that the audio book contains. I’m still listening to the first disc, but I will indeed listen to the others. This probably won’t discourage the would-be punk stars out there, but they will at least realize how much sweat, blood, and beer goes into the making of a band. I laffed. - Chris Walter

Black Sabbath – Doom Let Loose By Martin Popoff ECW Press Popoff, a true apostle of the almighty riff, drops this bad boy on us like a reading from the gospel according to Heavy Metal. Thanks to him, I now know more about Ozzy and the gang than most priests know about Jesus. This slab of a book is almost exhaustively informative but is highly recommended for the most devout Sabbath disciples. More passive fans, on the other hand, might find themselves a little overwhelmed. Whether it’s the stories regaled by the doom kings themselves about pissing on groupies back in their early days, the rotating bouts with alcohol abuse and cocaine psychosis among band members, or more proof that Ronnie James Dio is a bigger twat than even Gene Simmons, Popoff’s collected enough juicy anecdotes, quotes, and photos from his years of documenting the band to take us on a true journey with them from before their inception — when they were touring under the name Earth, playing heavy blues, and being assaulted by unappreciative audiences wielding hot pennies — to the present day. Also included are interviews with Sabbath mercenaries Ian Gillan, Tony Martin,Vinny Appice and Neil Murray. If you’re looking for a glimpse into the personal lives of the band members - the “dirt” if you will - this is the wrong book for you.You’re not going to find out the horrifying details of what Sharon does to Ozzy in the sack. The book is structured in an album-by-album format with each chapter dedicated to a specific record, offering insight on what was going on in the life of Sabbath during its conception, recording, release, and touring. In each chapter Popoff comments song by song and provides back-story into the inspiration for many of the tracks. It makes for some great trivia but, at times,

the book reads like an illustrated, 355-page-long album review. It is an efficient method, but the rigid structure lends itself more to spurts of coffee table reading than cover-to-cover reading, unless — as I mentioned before — you are a true Sabb head. It’s not often that the production value of a book matters much to me, but in the case of Doom Let Loose, it warrants mentioning. Aside from a bit of a weak cover design, the production value here is top-notch. The tidy layout, great full-colour images, and pull quotes make for a very likeable, balanced look, falling somewhere between book and magazine. Again, considering the rigid structure of the writing, it’s a look that will keep the passive fan turning pages and the “doomed” fanatic gorging themselves on Popoff’s gathered goodies. - Devon Cody

Welfare Wednesdays By Chris Walter Gofuckyerself Press Who knew that a six-foot-and-a-lot-of-inches, oldschool punk with a body full of tatties could be a hopeless romantic? Of course, when I say romantic, I mean it with a twist. Shall I explain? Yes, I think I shall. Love, booze, drugs, pimps, assholes, whores and a forearm tattoo of the Downtown East Side are all necessary ingredients in a Chris Walter fairy tale love story. Add a girl that steals pants from her johns instead of sucking their dicks, and a cowboy that pisses in his sink when the shared bathroom in his low-budget apartment reaches biohazard level 4, and what do you get? Love at first sight. The characters that Chris Walter developed so nicely on paper were easy to see in my mind. He had a brilliant way of humanizing the DTES. I found myself on the #20 Downtown bus looking out the window in search of the Jack and Lucy (our lovely couple) that I had created in my head. I found that even though the book was fiction it turned the grey (or should I say brown) shit-stained streets of DTES into a place that actually feels like home to me. It made me realize that this could actually be happening and that even people who others think are a waste of space can feel love no matter how far they slip away. And, it actually brought a tear to my eye. (I blame it on “girl things”) But enough of the sappy shit. Now to the joneses… every time I picked the book up I felt like I was getting my fix. I was entering a world from which I was previously one step removed; a world I’d never allowed myself to go to. I needed more.

When I would put the book down, I felt like I was abandoning Jack and Lucy at a crucial time in their lives. I was a junkie and this book was my drug. This brings me to my final statement. No matter how punk and hard-ass someone looks, he or she is always a pussy (as in cats…you freak) when it comes to love and being wisped away on a beautiful white fluffy cloud of crack smoke. Support your local sixfoot pussy and buy this book. - Heather O’Brien

The Nerve November 2006 Page 27

CONTENTS

CONDEMNED: CRIMINAL ORIGINS

By Dale DeRuiter Condemned: Criminal Origins Developer - Monolith productions, Inc. Publisher – Sega of America, Inc.

hate to admit it, but I screamed like a little girl when I was playing this game. I’m not going to sit here and try to tell you that I’m some tough guy or anything. That I never freak out or get scared from stuff. Up until recently, though, games were not super scary. Well, that is all over now. If Doom 3 didn’t scare you, the Linda Blair-childlike-zombie-ina-nighty-wielding-a-gas-pipe-and-flailing-at-you-afteryou-find-her-inside-of-a-locker no doubt will. Condemned: Criminal Origins is a psychological thriller, it’s dark, it’s dank and it’s fun as hell. People hit you with shit they ripped off of the walls like pipes and 2x4s.You run through a neighbourhood that is worse than all those buildings that’re gentrifying on East Hastings. The funny thing about the bad guys in this game is that they would be zombies except they’re not dead… yet… that’s left to you and your sledgehammer or whatever you grab from the assortment of weapons to finish the job. Instead of being straight up zombies, they look instead like they’re insane hobos and junkies of some new drug that makes people extra violent. Now you don’t even have to leave your house to have a Gastown adventure. You take on the character of Ethan Thomas, an FBI agent in the “Serial Crimes Unit” (SCU). At the beginning of the game you investigate a hunch that there might be some unusual connection—some shared criminal origin—between several of your recent serial killer suspects.You get separated from your team and half-way kill yourself when you try to flip a breaker.Your main suspect lays a trap for you and steals your gun. After he kills two of your team with your gun he takes off leaving you to take the blame for the murders.

the scumbag and clear your name.You have a friend on the inside of the FBI who believes you and helps you along your quest. She processes evidence that you gather and send to her over your PDA. This is a cool part of the game. There are multiple instruments that you use including a black light, a gas reader and a really fancy camera thing. It’s pretty sweet CSI action. It turns out that the guy you are tracking is actually murdering serial killers; he’s a veritable serial killer killer. This makes two 360 games that have parallel plot lines to movies. Just as Dead Rising was similar to Dawn of the Dead, Criminal Origins is very close to Suspect Zero. The movie came out a couple years ago and is actually quite good, so it’s all right that the game has a similar plot—you should watch it. It’s got that girl from the Matrix in it but, alas, not the leather jump suit. The very sexy Sir Ben Kingsley is in it as well with his glorious bald head. In the movie the serial killer killer played by Kingsley was trained by a shadowy section of the government and he tracks down the killers by meditating and seeing what they see. It starts making him crazy and he is trying to recruit a replacement who will help him catch the worst killer ever, one who does not set method for his killings and thus cannot be tracked. The FBIagent is starting to have visions himself and starts to use the visions to track the serial killer killer.

Shreditorial: Skull Skates 30th Skull Skates is three decades deep and the Skull bday at ex-funeral home The Chapel (304 Dunlevy) in crack-zombie DTES was un-dead. Talked sparking kingpins with icon Bill Danforth and met ’89-’91 NYC street pro PVO, first to skate Brooklyn Banks and Mike Vallely pal. Rob Nurmi told Rodney Mullen stories with impressions. Bricin Lyons skated cross-Canada, his guest model is Skull’s first true downhill deck. Thanks to PD and Lisa, band Hung Jury, Chapel owner Nathan Wiens (chapelarts.com), Dax, Norm, Dominique, fotog patrickhemingway. com, and all who made it rad. Missed it? Skull’s pix at skullskates.com and Hemingway’s at flickr.com/ photos/64301467@N00/ Kitsch Steez jedi Geoff Dermer’s new company Kitsch is in effect. The team of Brad Sheppard (the tech Gonz) and Jesse Booi (the lanky leaper) plus a standout range of decks, graphics, and accessories mean they kitsch ass. kitschskateboard.com Circa + Skull Skates = Shoe The Skull and the “C” mate furtively in postindustrial graveyard, digital seed spawns leathery twins. Nine evil months hence burst from mechanized womb to engulf yr extremities. Feel-y black suede, vulcanized souls and white skully tongues, look within to witness metatarsals. As gnar as Body Worlds 3 yet far more aesthetic; stick yr socks in the sublime. Underworld’s Future Underworld premiered “Yesterday’s Future” Sept 22 in Mtl. Labelle, Degros, Dermer, Montie, Dickson, Patterson, and Denham shred spots all over NorAm. Teaser’s at yesterdaysfuturevideo.com/yf-teaser002b. html Buy, my tiny pawns!!! Rising Son:The Rise and Fall of Skateboarder Christian Hosoi The fall and resurrection of Christ on a movie screen as big as his persona. The awesomeness! The ladies! The man-cleavage! Still rips, too. Holmes had 3 Skull Skates pro models- Mini, Mid, and Max. Thanks for the rad Don Pendleton art deck, guys. Protest Skateboards Check out the Protest video premiere Nov. 17th at Coastal Riders in Surrey.Vancouver premier TBA. Six Degrees of Correction Correcting incorrect corrections: SEB TEMPLER WON A.N.T.I.S.L.A.M. Seb won the sole trophy,

This parallels the game in that you’re tracking the bad guy who is killing other serial killers and you start to have these little visions throughout the game that allow you to see what your suspect is doing. Just like the movie except the bad guy is some hobo and not Ben Kingsley. n

So of course you go rogue and try to track down

CONDEMNED: CRIMINAL ORIGINS

Carlos Longos - China Creek. photo: PD The Nerve November 2006 Page 28

only increasing his already formidable sex appeal. Just sayin’. -D-Rock and Miss Kim. Email us at downspace@telus. net . China Creek Needs You! If you skate and read The Nerve on a somewhat regular basis, chances are you skate China Creek and already know what’s been going on. It’s a classic example of us not being taken seriously because we’re skateboarders and it’s complete horseshit. Maybe you’ve been going to the meetings for the last… what… two years now? Or maybe you only made it to the last one when Vancouver parks planner Michel Desrochers announced that he’s going to recommend to the Parks Board that they bulldoze the oldest skatepark in Vancouver. A park that gets used on a daily basis by skateboarders of all ages and skill levels. The planners will be presenting their recommendation to city council in early December and a decision will be made within the first couple months 2007. Now would be a great time to let our park board commissioners know what you think: Korina Houghton (planning committee chair) – korina.houghton@vancouver.ca Heather Holden (planning committee) – heather@ heatherholden.ca Allan DeGenova (planning committee) – adegenova@sutton.com Spencer Herbert (planning committee) – spencer. herbert@vancouver.ca Marty Zlotnik (finance committee chair) – martyz@ zlc.net Loretta Woodcock (finance committee) – lorettaisalways@shaw.ca Ian Robertson (finance committee) – igrobertson@ telus.net So whether you’re long burnt out on the process by now or are just getting involved at the 11th hour, take the time to send a few e-mails. Skateboarding was, is, and always should be punk rock… and China Creek is as punk rock as skateparks come. Don’t let it go without raising some shit. - Jeff Chan (grand_wazoo@hotmail.com)

CONTENTS AINSWORTH

CONTENTS COMICS

The Man That Matters By Jason Ainsworth Welfare Nerds. This is a sad story that really happened, just today. It’s about a little joke. A little joke that went to the wrong. Like Rudyard Kipling’s Light That Failed, this was the Joke That Failed, due to its connotations and errors in delivery. Deep and profound errors. I was hanging out with the rest of the Welfare nerds, not liking it much. Some guy, he walks into my area, real near, and the next thing you know, he’s talking up a storm about just nonsense, absolute rot. I ignore him, but Jesus, no shutting up. Then the line moves, and he says to me, “hey, what do you think my name is?” “sigh.” “OLIVER!” he yells, for fun, it’s all spitty in my moustache, thanks, Oliver. He’s not done…. I prepare myself for the worst. “Klosoff!” He just about falls into a puddle of laughs, unlike me. I’m offended. Even welfare cases aren’t obliged to be sexist, to make unpleasant and misogynist so-called jokes. “Guy, come on, try to evolve.” I give him a look, a pater familaris sort of look, a look that brooks no argument, okay. “It’s not au courant to make “jokes” at the expense of feminine modesty and decorum.” “Clothes fell off!” He bellowed, but looked less happy. I’m kind of glad I spoiled his afternoon. “I am au courant with what you meant with this joke, the nature of the humour. Some poor woman has had her clothes fall off. I mourn this woman’s ill fate.You mock” “Cocksucker” said Oliver, glinting. He was right.

See? I’m a good fellow. So everybody who is impressed by me being au courant with feminist practice and picking on people over petty jokes should help me find a job. Welfare is deceptively unprofitable. Anyway, kind of a resume here. I’m pretty good with my fists, I’m a Welshman and like to fight. I’m as tall as I am, deceptive, good with glasses, cups, saucers, four and a quarter inches, cut, That’s good to know. Networking. Um, drug and disease free (ha), criminal record’s clean, no need to check that, don’t bother. Bondable, I guess, um, if anyone needs a specialist in nineteenth-century French Academic painting, then, fuck, I’m your fucker. Don’t like these minimum wage jobs, every fucker in town’s been offering La Ainsworth a job like this, and paying the goddamn price. I have standards.

I’m a good fellow. So everybody who is impressed by me being au courant with feminist practice and picking on people over petty jokes should help me find a job. Welfare is deceptively unprofitable.

“And I’d like to point out that foreign names aren’t just made up, you know. They have deep cultural, and even spiritual meaning to differently-ethniced peoples. Wun Suk Kok may seem funny to you, but is actually a noble name descended from the king of some fucking Asian nation a million years ago.” “Cocksucker!” “Klosoff, this is neither a Russian, Georgian, Ukrainian name, its nothing. Just a made up joke by a sad, wet man”. (It was raining) “And I severely doubt under the circumstances that your Christian name is Oliver.You fucking, fucking faggot.” Anyway, this went on for awhile, he learned his lesson, and won’t be objectifying the gentler sex for a while.

Government spent eight years teaching me french, so that means I’m fluent, fuxck what the froggrilling cocksuckers say. They don’t understand me?? Got fucking the cum of seven faggots in each fucking goddamn ear, fucking fags fuck a fucking hole, don’t check for a figgin moustache. Hole fucking city is fags and Frenchmen. I have to stay a certain distance from children. Thank you for your interest in this matter.

I’m sorry. It’s wrong for me to use this forum to selfishly try to get a job. Please disregard the previous writings. It’s shameful. (call 604 720 7632) And I’d just like to openly criticize the stupid Jerk in the Westender who beat me out on a Spirit Bear article. Stupid jerk head indicated that the massive financial windfall generated by the sale of these mighty bears was a black eye to the reputation of Vancouver as an artistic city. Nonsense. The spirit bears amplify the aesthetic lacuna of this town. The spirit bears were fucking great and very beautiful to the eyes. I can’t wait until they unveil the new animal. It’s a secret what type it is. I hope it’s an elk. I so much want one next year, the official Nerve Spirit Elk. They did beavers a few years ago. I hope it’s an elk. I will make the official Nerve bear into an Indian Chief, or a Mountie.Yay! n

cards 4/4

full colour digital + offset printing

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(posterz one sided) plus $10 set-up/file check

all $CA or $US w’ free ship’g to WA/OR

digital & offset: cardz • posterz • stickerz • ticketz • brochurz • catalogz The Nerve November 2006 Page 29

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We acknowledge the financial support of the Government of Canada through the Department of Canadian Heritage (Canada Music Fund) and Canadaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s private radio broadcasters.

The Nerve November 2006 Page 30

CONTENTS

IN W O T TER

Your own pair of custom

Grand Prize: A pair of Motörhead custom VANS! • New Motörhead cd “Kiss Of Death” • Motörhead poster 3 runner-uP Prizes: • New Motörhead cd “Kiss Of Death” • Motörhead poster The new studio album KISS OF DEATH IN STORES NOW

www.imotorhead.com

Sanctuary_Motörhead_Nerve.indd 1

By Dan Scum

To win email your favourite Motörhead story to: win@thenervemagazine.com Subject: Motörhead Contest 29/9/06 17:03:59

somehow the wrong clues ran last month, here are the right ones.

Across 1. Charlton Heston NRA quote (pt.1) 5. Sanctuary 10. Epic 14. What Dog the Bounty Hunter does 15. Nimble 16. Guy with the opiates? 17. “_____ my dead body!” 18. High and mighty 19. Tear apart 20. Pt.2 Heston quote 23. No Trumps 24. Claypool of Primus 25. Shopping slogan, “Get your _____!” 28. Auto by Kia 31. Dali for short 32. Involuntary facial expression as a result of saying the word,”Cheese!” 34. Pennies 36. Trudge on 38. Movie industry job 40. Depend 41. “Hey!” in Quebec 43. “______ Daisy!” 45. 80’s BMX movie 46. Oral 48. Plusses 50. Common dessert 51. Abbreviation of established 52. George Bush Sr. quote pt. 1 61. Shaft between 2 wheels 62. Noel and Liam Gallagher’s band 63. Drop a fission bomb on 64. Greek bread 65. Step 2 on most shampoo bottles 66. Turner and Eisenhower 67. BC Place e.g 68. Ms. James’ 69. It is (in Quebec) Down 1. From 2. Hardware store chain that became Rona 3. Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries 4. Idiots 5. Tall, dark and ______ 6. Is there _ ___? (spiritual question)

7. Pontiac version of a Toyota Matrix 8. Ms. Fitzgerald 9. I.V. user’s need 10. Original Sk8 mag,yo! 11. Prayer ender 12. Touchdown 13. Conclusions 21. Opp. Of wths 22. What Tommy gave Pam (perhaps as an anniversary gift) 25. Niagra _____ 26. Thrown for _______(taken aback) 27. “I am not a crook!” 28. Region of Portugal 29. Like Xenon or Helium 30. Weary Titan 31. Bathhouse 33. Linear Tape-Open 35. Savage of Death Sentence 37. Old School Crusty Punks 39. Sizes up 42. Type of Milk 44.Yankee Sierra Sierra November 47. Melancholy ass 49. Glove maker 52. Talks 53. Leave 54. Prov. beside Sask. 55. Milk en Montreal 56. “Ain’t” to proper folk 57. Leanin’ tower town 58. A-bomb 59. Scrapes by 60. Wild direction September Issue’s Answers P

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The Nerve November 2006 Page 31

EVERY TIME I DIE Shit Happens This years “Breakthrough band of Warped Tour 2006” bring you a look into life on the road with “Shit Happens”. Features 2 hours of one of a kind ETID footage, ridiculous amounts of live songs, academy award winning music videos, hidden extras and never before seen “behind the scenes” footage from their hometown Buffalo Christmas show and warped 06’.

IT DIES TODAY Sirens Born and bred among the Buffalo, NY hardcore scene, It Dies Today creates a blend of brutal riffs, punishing breakdowns as well as huge anthemic and driving melodic sections. The release of their third studio album, “Sirens”, will strike a chord in the hearts of fans and soon to be fans world wide.

PRIZE FIGHTER INFERNO Debut solo album from Claudio Sanchez of Coheed and Cambria!! Long-arm and Butchie Bleam brothers brought together by physical distortion and social seclusion are about to find themselves in the running for the most unusual job in the world... DEATH! Listen to the story unfold as we follow these two misunderstood yet maniacal minstrels of macabre in a never ending race for ultimate power.

COPELAND

Also Available

Having spent the last five years building word-of-mouth buzz (at one point playing over 400 shows in the span of a year and a half) the band would have been foolish to endanger the momentum they’ve accumulated. Copeland is fresh of taking home the Yahoo! Music’s 2005 “Who’s Next” award, scrambling to the top of a dogfight between America’s very best indie rock bands on the strength of their devoted fan base.

CHIODOS Includes bonus acoustic tracks and bonus DVD of Chiodos music videos.

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A LIFE ONCE LOST

TRUSTKILL TAKEOVER VOL. 2

Originally released in 2003, “A Great Artist” started what A Life Once Lost is today.

Featuring 16 UNRELEASED tracks from the entire Trustkill roster and a bonus 16 month TK calendar.

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