Unapolegetically Unapolegetically Asian Asian
Story by Chika Ma
“You’re such a bad driver. It’s because you’re Asian.” I heard that sentence a week ago. But I won’t let it escape my mind. Throughout my lifetime, I have had many Asian stereotypes and assumptions thrown at me, but I just took them with a laugh. I just assumed they were joking around, so I didn’t let it affect me as it should have. If I felt hurt, I didn’t worry too much. In my eyes, I was just as human as everyone else. But I realized last week that not everyone thought the same as me. My sister and I were at Walmart, ready to go home, when she backed out of her parking spot. A white car came rushing past us and both of our cars accidentally hit each other. It was a small bump, so my sister continued driving. Later, the white car pulled up next to us, where white man rolled down the windows, furious that we hadn’t pulled over to check the damage. He started yelling that the bump happened because we were Asian. Why he said that, I didn’t know. If we had been another white person, would he have just laughed it off? “I’m sorry, I’m Asian,” my sister said sarcastically, furious. She was strongly against racism, and going home from Walmart, there was a slight tension in
the air. I had dealt with these stereotypes all my life. Because I was Asian, I was expected to get straight A’s, not speak English fluently, play the piano, be bad at driving, be unorganized, and have greasy hair. If I didn’t have one of these traits, people would just laugh at me. Because that was what was expected of me as an Asian. I felt guilty that I wasn’t living up to their standards. So my whole life, I tried being the “Asian” people were used to. And I shouldn’t have. It was their fault that they didn’t understand what it meant to be human. 90 percent of the population in Stevenson Ranch is white. None of these people had ever experienced racism or stereotypes, at least not in the way we the minorities were treated. So to most of them, making fun of the minorities was nothing. But to us, it was everything. I was hanging out with my “friends” at a plaza after the incident. When I told them what happened to me, they either laughed at it or didn’t even bother listen to what I was saying. I let the topic slide, which was a big mistake. If I had really cared about the topic, I should’ve said something and not just simply have ignored it. To make matters worse, I had been joking around, pushing a shopping cart when I accidentally bumped into a wall. One of those friends -- who I knew had listened to my story earlier and laughed at it -- decided to make a snarky comment that made me feel ten times worse. “You’re so bad at driving. Is it because you’re Asian?”
Hearing this, I felt the same emotion I had the other day: rage, so angry that I wanted to scream at his face and wake him up. I’m sorry I’m Asian. I’m sorry I’m bad at driving. I’m sorry I’m not a straight-A student and I enjoy other things besides the piano. I’m sorry I can speak English well. I’m sorry for not being born here. But, you know what I’m not sorry about? For being me. I’m not sorry that when I see someone being yelled at for being a minority, I will stand up for them. I’m not sorry I have the guts to call you out and make you feel bad for what you said. I’m not sorry I care about the people who are treated badly. And I am certainly not sorry that I am not your Asian. So let me leave you with this: To the minorities who just take it in: Stop sitting, and start standing up for yourselves. We cannot take this intolerance anymore. To the white racists in Santa Clarita: I am calling you out. This article is for you. To the “friends” who did not listen: You now exactly know the reason why I can’t look or speak to you anymore. And to the man in the white SUV: Maybe I am a bad driver. I wish people like you did not exist, as you do nothing but bring people down. I know I am Asian; thank you for pointing that out. But I will never apologize for anything I do because I am Asian. I am human. I am real. I deserve a chance to live and thrive, and I am unapologetically Asian.
IIknow knowIIam amAsian; Asian; thank thankyou youfor for pointing pointingthat thatout. out.But But IIwill willnever neverapologize apologize for foranything anythingIIdo do because becauseIIam amAsian. Asian.
