The Fun Issue
Spark Curiosity with
Jessica Clark
GO LOCAL (14) • LIVE INSPIRED (48) • FOLLOW YOUR DESIRES (90)
You started your business because you want to share your gifts with the universe. I did, too. (high five!)
I'm a web & graphic designer for do-good, feel-good businesses.
Overwhelmed and not sure where to start? You want something you're proud of that represents you & your work. You want something that potential clients will see and think, "yes please!" That's what I want for you, too. I provide next-level design support so you can focus on your clients and the amazing work you love! CDG@chantelledavisgray.com
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
We believe in choosing, embracing, unleashing, and celebrating who you've always been – who you already are – who you want to be.
Be YOU...the Perpetual You.
F IN D U S @THEPER PETU A LYOU
L ET T ER from our ED I T O R
THE
C
uriosity – the word sounds simple and appealing. Doesn’t it? Sure, we say, we’re curious!
Why wouldn’t we be?!
THE OFFICE The Perpetual You 101 Putnam Ave. Hamden, CT 06517
Then we dig in: to be curious can mean leaving our comfort zone; to be curious might mean facing a fear or taking a risk. No longer so simple, this
THE LIST To receive each issue of the magazine directly to your inbox, join our mailing list at: theperpetualyou.com/read.
T H E C O M MU N I T Y Look for us on social media @theperpetualyou.
thing called Curiosity! There was a time when we were naturally curious, though, before we started analyzing every decision and costcalculating every risk. As girls, we pursued curiosity because it was FUN (the opposite of boredom). Of course, we are now adults with responsibilities. We are wise enough to know that not every opportunity is worth pursuing. Still, our desire to discover and pursue lingers. To bridge that gap, we can allow curiosity back in to our lives in small doses. A new way
THE SOCIETY Meet like-minded women in our private FB group, The Perpetual You Society.
home from work. A new pair of ruffled PJs. A new color palette, to celebrate and inspire forward movement. These small decisions can lead to a greater awareness of what pleasure means to our adult selves. We can introduce ourselves to (or remind ourselves of!) pathways to fun. We can pursue those things that DO sound as if they’d be worth the risk, even if we’re
THE S U B S C R I P T I O N Sign up for our PRINT magazine at bit.ly/TPYandyou.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
hesitant, or a little bit scared. We can leap with the knowledge that we're still safe. We can have fun and still be us.
You can be scared and still be safe.
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P H O T O by J O A N N A F I S H E R
– REBECCA CAMPBELL
F IN D U S @THEPER PETU A LYOU
IN THIS ISSUE
Create Fun by Unleashing Curiosity M O N T H LY M US I C
Release limiting inhibitions with our "Dance / Discover" playlist @ bit.ly/TPYplaylists. T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Unleash
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Unleash the curiosity you’ve been ignoring or hiding. Get started by just asking the question WHY? – with St. Augustine, FL journalist, Jessica Clark W I T H P H O T O G R A P H E R S A R A H A N N AY
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Realize 14
Uncover the safe side of Curiosity. Try new without going/reaching/exploring too far away. Take small steps and reap big rewards.
Lifestyle Explore Nearby............................................... 14 Try Something New........................................ 30 Ruffle Your PJs................................................ 34
TPY Faves Books.............................................................. 17 Curry .............................................................. 18
30
Wine............................................................... 20 Dancing.......................................................... 22 Products......................................................... 24 Inquisitive Self-Care....................................... 32
27 Plus Photos of Iceland by @joanna_fisher
34 T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Dwell Undertake a Curious, conscious, and colorful approach to design. Start in the living room—the place in which you’re most comfortable and the most authentic.
Design Journal, then Design........................................ 42 Investigate Your Floor Plan................................ 44 Explore the Color Wheel.................................. 48
48
90
Live Understand the symbiotic relationship of Curiosity and everything else, including your mindset, your relationships, and your purpose in life.
Mindset Get to Know Your Body................................. 80 Deepen Your Relationships .......................... 84 Become Your Curious Self ............................ 90
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F IN D U S @THEPER PETU A LYOU
T H E MA K ERS
Our makers consistently share their time & talents. We'd love to introduce you to the lovely ladies who contributed to this month's issue.
Sarah
Kelly
Cover Photography
Dwell Feature Photographer
@sarahannayphotography sarahannayphotography.com
@kfpphotography kellyfpeterson.com
Sarah Annay is a wedding photographer, educator and
Kelly Peterson likes to take photos—to freeze the real
world traveler. When she isn't shooting weddings, she’s
moments that are happening right now to treasure now
hiking in Vermont, dipping her toes in the Atlantic, geeking
and remember later. She believes in moments over
out on photography equipment podcasts, and drinking
mountains, candids over proper poses, and community
beer (and coffee—at the same time). Her newest project,
over competition. She captures children, families, and
Vision for Empowerment, is a photography workshop
weddings with a documentary lifestyle approach, using
that provides art therapy and training to disadvantaged
natural light and meaningful locations. She would choose
women in Kolkata, India. This is Sarah's second time
to sit at the kids table any day! This is Kelly's first time
shooting the cover story for The Perpetual You.
photographing a Dwell feature for The Perpetual You.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Lee Lee Creative Director & Managing Editor
Jessie
Cindy
Art Director
Intern
@leeleeinp
@littlelegendsdesign littlelegends.com
Connect on Facebook
Lianne
Micayla
Cate
Content Editor
Books Editor
Marketing Assistant
@hilodaisy
@uggly_mugg zucchiniontheceiling.com
@cateclother cordella.org
Amanda Luisa
Kay
Krystal
Collaborating Photographer
Collaborating Photographer
Mantra Siren
@amandaluisaart amandaluisa.com
@walkerstudiosllc walkerstudiosllc.com
@krystalbrandt krystalbrandt.com
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Markie
Dana
Brittany
Contributing Photographer
Collaborating Artist
Collaborating Artist
@markiejonesphotographyllc markielynne.com
@danutzi danadesignillustration.com
@letterlanedesignstudio letterlanedesignstudio.com
Calling all Creative Ladies! TPY collaborates with artists, photographers, writers, and more. Visit bit.ly/TPYcollab for current opportunities!
Let me help your brand
Words by Lee Lee
Branding & Graphic Design for Passionate Business Owners.
Values-Based Copywriting for Cause-Based Businesses.
Let's start a conversation! j@createlittlelegends.com
wordsbylee@gmail.com
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
to align your daily practices with your ever-evolving desires
I L L U S T R A T I O N by J E S S I E L E I B E R
THE LA DY
Hedy Lamarr Beautiful Genius Regarded as the most beautiful woman ever to appear in films, Hedy Lamarr was much more than an actress. Her contributions to the motion picture industry earned her a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and her intelligence and curiosity lead to the invention of a frequency-hopping signal and earned her induction into the National Inventors Hall of Fame—proving looks + smarts can indeed coexist.
W O R D S by P. K . M C G I L L
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Some of the most interesting things in life happen when you stumble upon something by accident. – MEG KISSACK
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
REALIZE
UNLEASH
Fun Nearby with Marie Levey-Pabst
Explore the adventures that are part of everyday life.
W
hen I was in my early twenties I was offered an
We all need opportunities for adventure and exploration, but
opportunity to travel to Mali in Africa as part of
they need not be once-in-a-lifetime experiences. With a bit of
a community service trip. I would have lived in a
curiosity and creativity, everyday experiences can be just as
village, met amazing people, and helped to build a school, brick
adventurous! In unleashing curiosity in my everyday life, I find
by brick. I would have tried new foods, learned about a new
adventure in the most unlikely of places.
culture, and watched my high school students transform (which is my favorite thing to do). This trip was part of a cause I believed in and there wasn’t anything specific holding me back. I didn’t have children yet - just a spouse and a cat. I had no other summer plans. I had every reason to go, but I didn’t want to. At first, I came up with excuses. I mean, my cat needed me, right?! After a week or so, I realized the truth: I wanted to want to go. I wanted to be the kind of person who would hop on a plane to Africa with no qualms and only excitement. Instead, I was someone who preferred the comforts of home and didn’t want to travel without her partner. Bolstered by this realization, I politely declined. I spent that summer wrapped up in amazing books and camping within
GET CURIOUS. When our children were very little, traveling with them or even going into “the city” (a 10-minute drive away) felt overwhelming. We started looking, instead, for fun things to do closer to home. A few simply google searches resulted in us discovering the following, all close to our home: • A small museum of glass flowers and rocks that was free on Sunday mornings • Library story hours and meeting rooms with loads of toys and games for kids and grownups • Spray parks and spinning parks and parks near train stations (always a plus for our kids)
driving distance of my home. Long story short, that summer I learned that being adventurous and curious about the world doesn’t always mean getting on a plane. There was plenty I was adventurous and curious about that was nearby.
continued on next page
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• Small movie theaters that played classic movies (and more recent hits, like my spouse’s favorite, Ghostbusters) • Nature trails galore! Getting curious about our small hometown led us to more fun and adventure than we thought we would find, with the added benefit that we could still get home quickly after a diaper blowout.
GET INSPIRED. I’ve visited amazing sights of nature: Yosemite National Park, Niagara Falls, El Yunque Rainforest in Puerto Rico. Though each has its unique charms, there are also many natural wonders and charms to be found closer to home.
Reflect + Release The following prompts will help you get curious about
Nearby, we can choose to hike in the woods, camp near
FUN in your life! Take 10 minutes to think about and
wild blueberry bushes, or go to a lake or beach. I also love
respond to one or both of the following questions:
getting curious about nature blended with urban settings, be it bike paths and greenways, walks near rivers, or the occasional sighting of a peacock or peregrine falcon in our city.
• List the last 5 things you did that were fun. When did they happen? Who were you with, or not with? What are “smaller” versions of that type of fun (such as a short hike instead of a camping trip, a local pond trip instead of a week at the beach, etc.) What are
Nature is always a chance for fun and adventure, as well as an opportunity to breathe and reconnect with ourselves. With a bit of curiosity and the disposition of an explorer, the fun of nature is often closer than we think.
“bigger” versions? • What will you try for a week just to see what happens? What is a boundary or parameter you can set and see what creative ideas come from it? What are you curious about around your daily life, or the place you
G E T C R E AT I V E .
live or work? Where are opportunities for curiosity and fun that are already around you?
Sometimes unleashing fun isn’t just about what to do. It’s about what to do without. One of the paradoxes of creativity is that having boundaries and parameters unleashes new creative ideas just as much (if not more) than having open-ended possibilities.
Too often we think we have to WAIT to have fun, as if we have some dues to pay before we can unleash a new
I once spent a year tracking every cent my family spent
experience. Truthfully, fun and pure enjoyment are part of
in an attempt to keep our spending down during my
being YOU. Be willing to explore what is fun to you, not just
unpaid maternity leave. In the process, we got creative
what you think should be fun for you.
about ways to have fun on the cheap. We found more cool places to visit using discounts, library passes, and “free admission” events. We went on adventures to places and tried things that we never would have done without these parameters. If you’re looking to cut costs without losing adventure, explore the 1-mile radius around your home, or figure out the best way to use up all the canned food you haven't touched in a year.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Get curious. Embrace the fun close to home. Grab ahold of your curiosity and see where you end up.
Marie Levey-Pabst is the founder of the Create Balance method. She teaches parents to create balance between family, work, and personal fulfillment. Connect with Marie at @CreateBalanceCommunity on Facebook or at CreateABalancedLife.com. Photos by @markiejonesphotographyllc
REALIZE
P H O T O by @ C A T B A L L O U 2 4
CRA FT ED CU RI O S I T Y
A Short Residence in Sweden
The Creative Habit
Swing Time
by Mary Wollstonecraft, Pub. 1796
by Twyla Tharp, Pub. 2005
by Zadie Smith, Pub. 2016
This little-known classic is akin to Eat, Pray,
In this nourishing, practical guidebook to
This melancholic tale of broken sisterhood
Love in its transformative message and
daily creativity, Twyla Tharp distills the lessons
and scattered dreams reads like an ode to
globetrotting narrative. An inspiring account
she’s gathered from her outstanding 35+ year
the common threads that tie all our lives
of Mary Wollstonecraft’s journey through
career in the creative arts. This will become
together. Zadie Smith keeps us questioning
Denmark, Norway, and Sweden - it offers
a beloved life-long resource, getting you
throughout the entire meandering plotline of
a rare glimpse into the world at that time
unstuck in your creative pursuits, again, and
two girls born in the projects, each hopelessly
through a woman’s perspective. This travel
again, and again. The greatest gift from this
infatuated with dance, and desperate for
journal intertwines the universal with the
fascinating read is in allowing us to see life as
something more. Getting lost in this novel is a
deeply personal, inspiring even modern
a creative gold mine, and encouraging us to
healthy reminder that any endeavor requires
readers to get curious, and get moving!
make space for and fun and curiosity daily.
curious determination.
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
REALIZE
UNLEASH A
Culinary Adventure with Rachel
Haas
Adventure into new culinary territory, with a flavorful curry that offers room to grow while still being familiar enough to not overwhelm the senses.
T
he familiar is comforting. Stepping out of your
Coconut milk, shredded chicken, chopped veggies. Spices,
comfort zone and trying new things, allowing
added and simmered slow to let the flavors build. Create-
curiosity to be the guide instead of sticking to
your-own adventure, every page a new step into flavors
old habits can be a remarkably difficult yet rewarding accomplishment. Breathing, putting one foot in front of the other, and then diving in—eyes wide open. In the search of a place to start, the kitchen is a wonderful
unexpected but delicious. Autumn is the perfect time to spread your wings and tip your toes into creativity. Start off slow, simmer gently, and see where the journey takes you.
jumping off point. Open your spice cabinet. Find the seasonings barely touched, maybe even completely unopened. Examine them. Maybe take off the lid and take a careful little sniff. Let the aromas conjure up—and give strength to—new ideas.
Feast on more of Rachel's food experiences at @lusciouswordsandcurls. Photo by Mary Godier, @itsmaryelizabeth
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
REALIZE
Wine 101 When it comes to wine, a very small step out of your comfort zone can lead to great rewards. We’re creatures of habit—traversing to the same wine store or sticking to the same varietal. Sure, if we’re buying for a gathering or to celebrate a special tradition, sticking to what we know is probably best. What about the times, though, when a little more adventure might be appropriate? A weekend away from the kids. A night out with girlfriends, or a night spent in—with takeout and a family movie. Push Yourself, just a tad. Stick with your favorite color, but try a different brand. Or try a different varietal from a brand you know and love. Try out that pretty bottle with the price tag that scares you just a little. Get on that mailing list. Invite over that adventurous friend. Schedule a winery tour. Expanding your palette will help you get to know your preferences— and your neighborhood wine store owner, too.
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REALIZE
UNLEASH
Your Body with
Julia Grimaldi
Dance is present in all of us: a natural movement practice we don’t have to be good at. Simply to enjoy your body and discover a benefit to what is already within. Invite yourself to a dance party! This is how it works. You don’t have to go anywhere. No cover charge, lessons, or special shoes (if any at all) are required. You can go solo, or invite a friend. Two left feet? No one is watching. Dancing is a whole-body workout – it builds a strong body and mind. Have some fun exploring your body in motion dancing to your authentic beat. Turn up your favorite tune and shake, rattle, and roll what your mama gave ya. Give yourself and your body permission to let loose and move with freedom and curiosity. Get to know your body in a whole new way. Take time to go on a spontaneous journey where you don’t need to know the destination.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Photo by Walker Studio LLC
Ready to dance? Check out the playlist Julia curated for us this month at bit.ly/TPYplaylists.
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REALIZE
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Unleash Incubation Whether a walk through the local park on your lunch hour, or an entire afternoon spent outdoors, nature is life’s great incubator—providing inspiration for and the impetus to pursue creativity, curiosity, and curation of our ideal lives. Don those hiking boots and your favorite lightweight scarf; grab an oversized basket in which to stash wild flowers. Spend the day playing with nature—where fun almost always lead to fruition.
F E AT U R E D P R O D U C T S (left) We’re pleased to feature products by Root & Branch, a shop that sells beautiful lifestyle products, handcrafted by local and fair-trade artisans. Root & Branch is currently featuring the work of Entwine, an inclusive textiles studio where artists of all abilities explore many facets of fiber art. Together as a studio, the artists strive to create a cohesive body of work while teaching skills and independence for considering one's own creativity. DANIELLE JURIN COPPER EARRINGS ($18) handmade in Pennsylvania SERRV FAIR TRADE BASKET ($55) handmade in Ghana ENTWINE HANDWOVEN SCARF, 100% COTTON ($40) handmade in Pennsylvania
P R O D U C T S F O R A S I M I L A R L O O K (right) Gratitude + Friendship to Real Woman Model, Nikisha Weiser. Shop the following links for a look similar to hers: BALBOA BEACHY BLOUSE ($27) via 28 Newport LEVI’S 711 SKINNY JEANS ($98) via Free People SPRING STEP BOOTS ($90) via Zappos.com
All products from: Root & Branch, rootandbranchshop.com, @rootandbranch Curator/photographer, Cate Clother, @cateclother
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Sleepwear for a Cause mct-usa.org
where style meets wellness EssentialAdornment.com
SHOP NOW
Shop the Marketplace The Perpetual You's curated marketplace of responsibly-made, small batch goods is online! theperpetualyou.com/the-marketplace
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
REALIZE
UNLEASH
New Landscapes with photographer
Joanna Fisher I’ve visited 15 countries, and every time I leave a new place, I leave hungry to see more. Meeting people different from myself, who have had different life experiences and who see the world differently, has broadened my own thinking—whether making me question things I held to be true, or solidifying what I already believed. In this way, travel has made me more whole.
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I
celand was unlike any of the other countries I had visited previously: I wanted to experience it all without putting any pressure on myself to enjoy it a certain way. I left lots of time for
wandering and spur of the moment decisions. Upon arriving in each of the villages that I visited, I would give myself a few hours to “settle in,” which mostly consisted of sampling local delicacies (turns out puffin is delicious!), and scouring the landscape for great images I could create. I’m partial to architecture; I love old buildings and homes with history. When traveling, I’m always looking for buildings that speak to the charm of that country. In Iceland, I was drawn most to the small churches on the hillside, and the farmhouses seemingly plopped down in the middle of nothingness. Red roofs, old shepherd’s huts in the sides of the cliffs, and churches on hilltops are my favorite images from the trip.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
A willingness to try new things is key to pursuing curiosity. Soaking in a new place with a landscape that is so vastly different from our own in the United States - that’s what I live for! Trying Icelandic delicacies isn’t everyone’s cup of tea; but, I make it a point to try the local fare wherever I go. In Iceland, that just happened to be puffin and shark. In addition to the reward of challenging myself and leaving my comfort zone, every trip I’ve taken has taught me a little bit more about myself and where I fit in in the world. As vastly different as we all are within our own little pockets, we are also the same. The most meaningful insight I’ve gleaned from each experience abroad is that we’re all human. This is something I needed to discover on my own.
Connecticut native Joanna Fisher began her photography journey over ten years ago, and since then has been nationally and internationally published for her contributions in the wedding industry. Since being given the opportunity to travel to France at the age of 14, she has visited fifteen countries, thirty five U.S. states, and intends on seeing 50 countries by the age of 50. Joanna gives back by volunteering her time to teach photography to villages in coastal Mexico.
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REALIZE
Unleash Exploration with Leigh Schwab
Whether through resources, research, or trying something new, investigating clean beauty can be loads of fun.
P
art of the joy for me in going green has been discovering
and trying out new routines, I can remain judgment free and
and trying new products not seen in conventional
continue to educate myself about the products I love.
brands. As I have become more educated about the
ingredients in these products, I understand why we don’t see them in mainstream beauty.
While I don’t mind exploring the tons of online resources about the clean beauty industry, one of my favorite ways to stay curious is through a beauty subscription box, which often
Lucky for me, I enjoy trying new things and don’t need to
introduces me to a product I’ve never heard of. Getting to try
have all the answers to explore something. If a product looks
something new once a month is a whole lot of hands-on fun.
intriguing, I try it! By welcoming in new beauty products
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
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BeYOUtiful From samples to subscription boxes to starter bags, hands-on exploration is a fun way to expand your beauty knowledge, as well as figure out which products are going to work best for you.
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Try It On For Size I love nothing more than finding a product I have been dying to try in a travel size! This allows me to have enough product to try on a consistent basis so that I can truly judge whether the product works for me. If the product is a winner, I then have a travel set ready to go for my next vacation! Leigh recommends...
2
True Botanicals Sample Sets
2
Think Inside the Box Beauty subscription boxes are great for introducing you to products you may never purchase yourself. It is like a special gift that shows up every month! Beauty Heroes is my absolute favorite because of their commitment to sustainable ingredients. Leigh recommends...
Beauty-Heroes Subscription Box
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Shop Small, Literally Many online green skincare companies are making their own starter kits for clients to try. These include sample, travel, and sometimes full-size products that allow for their customers to test multiple products, which makes switching
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to safer as easy as trying out a new brand! Leigh recommends...
Shop Follain Bestsellers Kit
Leigh Schwab uses her love for skin care to help educate women about the ingredients in their products and the need for proper skin care legislation in our country. Learn more about her passion for a healthy and simple life on Facebook and Instagram @leighschwab.
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REALIZE
Self-Care for the Curious YOU Leave Your Comfort Zone. Try a new dish or even a new restaurant; go somewhere
in your neighborhood you’ve never been. Invite a neighbor you haven’t yet met over for a cocktail. You’ll learn as much about yourself as you do about them! Kindle Your Desires. Take a class to learn
a new language or cooking style; write that novel that’s been calling to you. Reach out to another business owner and propose a collaboration. Focus on taking the first step, and see what happens next.
P H O T O by @ A M A N D A L U I S A A R T
U N L EA S H N EW I N T ERES T S
Being inquisitive about new things is what keeps life exciting. Keeping the fire of curiosity burning inside helps us to constantly discover more about our potential and ourselves. If we are daring to go head first into unfamiliar territory—which might involve having the humility to be a beginner at something again—we can keep evolving and finding new interests that bring us joy. This month’s Wellness Toolkit will encourage you to jump-start your new experiences and explorations. There is so much to learn and experience in this world; there’s no need for limits!
HERB
E SSE NTIAL OIL
CRYS TAL
ANIMAL
Green Tea
Frankincense
Tigers Eye
Monkey
BENEFITS
BENEFITS
BENEFIT S
BENEFI TS
A gentle stimulant that improves brain function and overall physical health
A legendary oil that channels excess energy and inspires a fresh perspective
A powerful stone that helps to quiet fear and encourage decisiveness
One of the Chinese Zodiac signs, indicative of energetic nature and instinctive curiosity
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
T O O L K I T curated by @ E A R T H S P E A K S B R O O K LY N
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REALIZE
Unleash Something New with Cait Sherrick
Nothing’s stopping you except yourself
I
prefer clean lines over ruffles, buttons over bows, and neutrals over pinks. I'm a bit more creatively minimalist than I am traditionally 'girly' when it comes to my sense of style.
Until recently, sort of. Let me explain. This past spring, Target had these adorable gray and white striped pajama shorts hanging near the main aisle; you know, right by the register so you can’t NOT see them. Every time I’d pass them, I’d lovingly ogle them, touch them, check the price, and then put them back. I’d put them back every single time because they had ruffles on the bottom hem.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Did I mention that I’m anti-ruffle? After weeks of the same “ogle, touch, check the price” routine, I up and bought them. I was so over my self-imposed ruffle limitation. I bought them because it’s important to try new things, because trying new things in small ways with small details is much less scary than diving head first into a fully ruffled top, because exploring new details in style can bring out a whole new side of you.
Unleash Ruffled Pajama Shorts Fun and flirty, ruffled pajama shorts are an easy way to try a new, trendy detail in the comfort of your own home.
1
Lingering Pair your shorts with a graphic tee and some cozy socks. The socks are sure to keep your feet warm and the ruffles add a
1
little feminine touch to your otherwise basic nighttime wear. Pictured: ruffled pajama shorts, graphic tee, socks
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Lounging Layer your most comfortable cardigan over a plain tank top, pair that with your shorts and throw on some slippers. Easy and comfortable this around the house look is as perfect for relaxing as it is for getting things done. Pictured: ruffled pajama shorts, tank top, cardigan, slippers
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Laughing Wear your shorts with a soft gray t-shirt and an oversized sweatshirt. The large sweatshirt contrasts nicely with the short shorts, leaving you looking cute, stylish and ready for popcorn, movies and silly photos. Pictured: ruffled pajama shorts, gray t-shirt, sweatshirt
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Ruffled pajama shorts, sweatshirts with lace, flared jeans… whatever detail you choose to try out this month, know that—by doing so— you’re indulging your sense of curiosity. Have a little courage, trust yourself. Nudge yourself outside your comfort zone, softly and gently. I guarantee you’ll like who you are out there, ruffles and all.
Cait Sherrick is a jewelry designer + stylist for mildly rebellious flow-goers at Leocadia K. She’s deeply inspired by modern art, has a boho heart + loves the warm, unconditional love of a good cup of chai tea. Join her on Instagram @caitsherrick for daily inspiration + visit her shop for more every day outfit ideas. Photo by @stephdale27
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P H O T O by K A T E K E A R N S
P E R SPECT I V ES from T H E PA N EL
What's something you've done (or a practice you've adopted) that surprised you?
List making. Since having my second baby, I have been surprised at how little I am able to keep track of. As someone who has always prided herself in being super organized and on top of
Amanda Writer + Content Creator Prim and Propah @primandpropah primandpropah.com
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
things, the fleeting thoughts of a busy (read: frazzled) Mom-onthe-go need to be reined in. Putting my ideas, feelings and more often, my to-do items on a piece of paper has been something new for me. I've been surprised by the relief of being able to take things from my brain and put them somewhere to revisit later.
REALIZE
I left my job as Director of Sales at a very innovative tech startup to be head coach for my former H.S. badminton team. Since I’d never had any coaching training or taught badminton,
Catt Marketing Consultant @cattkaizen cattkaizen.com
I relied on lessons from my time in management. I outlined intentions, delegated tasks, and communicated boundaries regularly. Everything was effectively executed, and we were able to really enjoy ourselves as a team. Finding out that all these corporate tools worked in a sports team was such a delight!
I have always had a love affair with crafting. In fact, I have an obsession with gift wrapping and I hoard grosgrain ribbon!
Paula Jean Creator Your PURPOSE works @yourpurposeworks YourPurposePages.com
After a 28-year corporate career, I traded in project plans and timelines for paper and colored pencils. I became a writer and artist, self-publishing my first book! I now have a desk that holds glue, pens, brushes and space for writing inspirational messages with art that reminds me to listen to my heART.
I gave myself permission to put all my things in storage last fall and
Hayley Founder & CEO Soul Sparkle @hayleyhunterhines soulsparklemagic.com
head out for an adventure of a lifetime. I had been dreaming of the trip for over a decade and finally made it happen. While traveling and teaching for the last eight months, I’ve fallen absolutely in love with this moment in my life. I think I was afraid to step out and see what life would be like and I’m proud of myself for doing life in a different way.
Nancy Mayor St. Augustine, Florida @mayorshaver nancyshaver.com
There is no question that finding myself running for public office surprised me. It still does. (A book from Amazon about how to run a campaign was my guide.) Winning office didn't surprise me as much!
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P H O T O by @ A M A N D A L U I S A A R T
– MARY B ETH D AN I EL SO N
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
to align your physical space with your ever-evolving self
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Magnifying Glass / 'magn fÄŤ iNG glas / noun A nostalgic device used to discover the unknown
A R T by @ A M A N D A L U I S A A R T
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
DWELL
Design Questions to Ponder What colors do you like, and why? What patterns make you smile? Do you like clean lines or curvy? Do you prefer furniture with a past? Do pillows say comfort or clutter to you, and why? Do you like to mix and match textiles, metals, or styles?
Find Your Design Let’s pretend design trends don’t exist and just get curious about our personal aesthetic. Getting away from what’s popular can help us to define what we truly love. Keep a design journal for a week and use it to get to know your own aesthetic. What do you love about your home? What would you change if you could? Keep this journal close by—on your bedside table or next to a favorite chair—so that you can reflect often and when the opportunity arises. Keep it light and fun, stay away from analysis. Just journal and dream! Once you are secure in your personal design philosophies, you can easily wean out any trends that don’t resonate, and start implementing those that do.
Photo by Sarah Annay Photography
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
DWELL
Living Room Remix M A K I N G S PA C E F O R M O R E O F W H AT Y O U W A N T with LaToya Burton
Create the possibility for playful experiences by rearranging your living room.
O
ur homes can be the catalyst we need to shift our perspective and bring more fun into life. Get curious about the possibilities
by rearranging the furniture and accessories you already have. Adopt your creative mindset, and decide your design based on the way—or ways—you use the room, and you’ll enjoy the space more often. Flow. How do you move through your space? If your living room has several openings it can be a challenge to lay out. If some doors are rarely used, don’t be afraid to put {easy-to-move} furniture in front of them, redirecting flow through the room. Overall, aim for ease of movement.
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Purpose. Identify how you gather in your space and place your
shapes can create a sense of balance and visual interest.
furniture based on frequent activities. If your family frequently
Similar pieces can create a formal look; a mishmash can
plays games, include a round table to gather around. Or
prioritize comfort.
ditch the furniture and opt for floor cushions and bean bags. Coffee tables or a bar cart are handy if you entertain or have frequent snackers.
Colour, Texture & Pattern. Don’t be afraid to mix and match colors, patterns and textures! If you are new to design, try starting with a set of 4 main colors and branch out from there.
Placement. Once you understand the flow and the purpose of
Every time you bring something into the room you can ask
you your space, begin to arrange furniture starting with the
yourself if it fits into your current palette. It is the contrast
largest pieces first. Remember furniture doesn't have to sit
between all of these elements that really makes a room pop.
against a wall, it can float in a space or be anchored by using credenzas, side tables or a rug. Shape & Size. The scale of the sofa makes it one of the main focal points in most living rooms with the other pieces working around it. Mixing large and small-scale items of different
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
LaToya is a mama / imaginer / gypsy nomad who explores life through the lens of interiors imagination and inspiration. She lives on a bus with her husband and son exploring the Australian landscape. For more inspiration, follow her @latoyaburton_musing. Photos by Walker Studios LLC
Dwell on This Leave the rules behind and take a new perspective on your living space! Open your imagination and try something new. It is your home, so you get to decided what is allowed. Spread the curiosity and fun into all areas of your home.
1
Double Duty. Select furniture and accessories that can do more than one thing. A drum can function as a decorative item, it can be used as a side table and as the instrument that it is. A storage cabinet can be used for storage and as a t.v. stand. A decorative light can be used as artwork and as an accent light.
2
Personalize. Don't forget the accessories. Display your collections, art, and photos on shelves, tables and walls. Add a touch of nature in the form of plants, flowers, shells or stones. Consider the symbolism and meaning attached to your chosen items - this adds to the mood of your space in subtle ways.
3
Set the Mood. Lighting can transform your space. First take advantage of the natural light during the day translucent shades combined with movable curtains allow for access to light while maintaining privacy. Then choose general lighting and task lighting that is appropriate for the activities that occur later in the day. Accent lighting is great for highlighting artwork.
Does your home bear the marks of intentional design? We’d love to feature you! Send us an email: hello@theperpetualyou.com
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Living My Vision Board HOW CURIOSITY LED TO AN
I N S P I R AT I O N A L L I V I N G R O O M
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DWELL
Unleashing curiosity allowed me to envision and engineer a space I truly love living in.
I
n the many years when I lived in and out of different apartments, I just moved right in, decorated immediately, and didn’t hesitate to set up house. Ten years ago, I bought a
house, and something changed. Suddenly, wall colors, furniture, and décor all seemed daunting and permanent. Indecisiveness set in to the point that I didn’t decorate at all. After moving in, work got busy, obligations kicked in and life took over. Hand-me down furniture took the place of any intentional design, and our house began to look more like a college dorm than the home of two forty somethings. My husband once asked, “Why isn’t our house like other people’s?” I said, “Because someone has to care enough to do something about it.”
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Curiosity only does one thing, and that is to give. And what it gives you are clues on the incredible scavenger hunt of your life. – ELIZABETH GILBERT
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
I started doing some inward connecting including breathwork, healings with a shaman, deep mind-body connections, beginning to love my imperfections. As I changed inwardly, I wanted my outward world to reflect what I was feeling: ALIVE, comfortable in the quiet alone, and connected to my tribe and spirit. As my own imperfections were increasingly accepted, I started to get more curious about things. If I could judge less and explore more, my home could be a living vision board—reflective of the life I have and the life I want. Over the past two years, I have followed my curiosity through travel, including time spent in Peru and Guatemala. Whenever paralyzing thoughts about redecorating and rearranging my living room crept in, like—What if the colors didn’t work? What if I spent a ton of money on furniture I didn’t like?—I opted to channel the curiosity that had been my companion in my travels. I love COLOR! My trips to Peru and Guatemala showed me how bright colors and beautifully patterned handiwork can co-exist and enliven a space to inspire fun and happiness. I wanted to create a space that felt as alive as the mercados and street festivals I had seen on my trips. Since spending time in Peru, I have been struck by the easy use of bright colors in everyday life. With this in mind, my living room remake all started with a bright, multicolored rug. As soon as I saw it, I knew this rug was my anchor piece and the rest would fall into place. As a meditator and an artist, I took some time to go inward asking myself what I wanted to feel when I was in this room and how to bring my aesthetic to life. Since, after ten years this space still didn’t feel quite right, this took some soul searching.
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A long and narrow room is difficult to design. Several attempts to style this room had ended in awkward displays of too large furniture and large open spaces. By going inward, I discovered a few things I absolutely required of this newly decorated room. The first goal was to create two distinct spaces which I realized could be achieved by just letting go of the excess of furniture I had been holding onto. Next, the room would evoke feelings of aliveness. One area would be a space for reflecting quietly, reading oracle cards, connecting with friends, and most importantly— enjoying the fireplace. The second area would be a bit more casual and create space for watching movies or reading a good book. I wanted to feel as if the room was inviting me in for tea and conversation. I wanted to feel like all aspects of myself could live comfortably in this room. I wanted to feel like I
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
was on vacation and at home. I wanted to feel warm and cozy but light and airy. I wanted to feel happy to come home to my beautiful space. When I zeroed in on the feelings I wanted to have in my new living room, the pieces fell into place. My past hesitation turned to excitement and joy. As I purchased or repurposed each item, I was led to the next piece of the puzzle. After the rug, I chose the paint color, Mermaid’s Song, a reminder of my love for the sea. Part of staying curious was also asking for help and guidance from friends and receiving it. My curiosity led me to explore thrift stores, catalogs, and online stores to find right pieces. They seemed to magically appear and the process was delightfully fun. By staying curious, my mind opened to items I may not have chosen in the past.
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Decide + Divide Dealing with an awkward layout of your own? Feeling lackluster about a space you know you could feel inspired by? Here are Lydia’s tips on the stuff to pay attention to when designing a room you want to feel good about and enjoy your time in.
The biggest surprise in creating the new living
1
Purpose. I opted to separate the room into two parts based on use
room was how many inspirational items I already
of each area. The front area welcomes guests to make
had at home. The embroidered wall hanging and
conversation or warm up by the fire; the back of the room is for kicking back and watching my Netflix with my husband or
brightly colored blankets I bought in Peru a year
curling up with a good book.
earlier fit the color scheme and room aesthetic with ease, coordinating perfectly with the rug I had
2
already chosen.
Positioning. I used furniture and art to divide the room into distinct spaces.
When I am in the room with these textiles, I am
Once the spaces were conceived, it was easy to use accessories
reminded of my time in Peru and the grounding and
to develop cohesion between spaces without diluting the vibe of each area.
inspiration I felt there. I was inspired to transform an oversized sectional into a perfectly sized loveseat. A decorative side table now sits beside an oversized chair that is just right for the new space. A large
3
Proportion. Placing a large, glass lamp on a small wooden table plays with
scarf shrouds the TV when it is not in use to create
unlikely proportions and allows both pieces to be seen. My
an electronics free-vibe.
oversized sectional and coffee table took up too much space, so I made a loveseat from the two corner pieces and added a tray to the ottoman to create a coffee table.
Part of my inward journey has involved a reconnection to nature so bringing natural elements in to the room was a must. A table covered with crystals, stones and wood greets me and my guests
4
Play. The biggest lesson I learned from this process is to play and
as soon as we enter the room. There is a sense of
have fun. Play with color. Play with adding a touch of whimsy to
grounding and a feeling of lightness all at once.
your room. Enjoy your time shopping and dreaming. Who said decorating has to be so serious?
While designing, the thought occurred to me that I do share my home with my husband and that he may need some representation in this design. After many years of unwedded bliss, we were recently married on our 22nd anniversary. I chose to include some enlarged photos from our nontraditional wedding to balance the feminine and masculine energy.
5
Peace. A peaceful place to contemplate, get inspired, meditate, and dream was a must for me. Using natural elements like wood, stones, and crystals adds calm to the room’s aesthetic. What brings you a sense a calm? Lighting, an essential oil diffuser, natural elements, or an inspiring book can create that sense of peace.
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As a way to bring a family element into the room and as a
complete room in my house because I put my whole self
way to honor my ancestors, my collection of Matroyshkas
into creating it. With my curiosity and a sense of wonder
were gathered and displayed on the mantle. They are the
leading the way, the process of creating this space was filled
ultimate in childhood curiosity: opening one doll after
with ease and straight up fun. I’m excited to have my first
another wondering which will be the last. My husband
party in the new space and look forward to quiet time in my
inherited a white leather mushroom shaped ottoman from
inspirational corner.
his parents so it was included as another whimsical aspect of the dĂŠcor. I feel that I have created an actual LIVING room. The room tells a story about who I am, where I came from, and who I want to be. The room is unique in my home in that every aspect of the design is infused with introspection, intention, and attention. The living room feels like the most whole and
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Lydia Mandell is a coach, breathworker, artist, and performer working with people seeking to overcome personal and creative blocks. By offering tools to close the disconnects between mind, body, and spirit, Lydia connects clients with their true selves. Connect with her at LydiaMandell.com. Photos by Kelly Peterson
Ocean Air corresponds to Benjamin Moore CSP-840
Your Inner Child corresponds to Benjamin Moore AF-120
Illuminate + Align corresponds to Benjamin Moore AF-395
Lagniappe
V I BRA N T + V I S I O N A RY
corresponds to Benjamin Moore 070
An abundance of color in an equally abundant space can bring feelings of ease and intimacy without restricting desired activities. Stretch out your legs; do some daydreaming or get lost in a worthy magazine. Surround yourself with the colors of the rainbow and enjoy the ideal life you’ve landed in.
Anchor Me corresponds to Benjamin Moore CW-380
Prefer less color? Here are some ways to incorporate these hues in smaller doses:
Artwork
Accent Pieces
Create a collage of small treasures or invest
Small tiled tables, oversized lampshades on an
in an oversized masterpiece. 3-dimensional
interesting base, hanging textiles that remind
pieces can act as a focal piece or just be a
you of a special vacation spot… You can’t go
curious conversation starter.
wrong when you infuse color in these not-aslarge ways.
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DWELL
Shop the Look Curiosity flourishes when we slow down enough to notice the world around us. Keep a soft blanket and a tray for holding the day’s tools—from a mug of steaming tea to a deck of oracle cards—nearby to encourage an extended stay in the land of discovery.
Suggested Products for a Similar Look: HELLO GORGEOUS MUG ($18) from Happily Ever Etched via Etsy ∙ MILL ACACIA RECTANGULAR TRAY ($39.50) from Pottery Barn ∙ CHAKRA WISDOM ORACLE CARD DECK ($16) from Tori Hartman ∙ ALPACA BLANKET ($65) from Tejarte Peru via Etsy T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
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– E L L E N LA N GER
to align your life story with your ever-evolving sense of self
T H REE Q U ES T I O N S
with
Jessica
What's one practice in your daily life that
What about your physical space allows
For you, what is the relationship of
brings you fun?
you to be curious?
fun & curiousity?
I like walking and looking around at my
I don't know if anything "allows" me to be
surroundings, whether it's on the beach or in
curious. I just am. Some things may prompt
The ah-ha moment! The moment when I learn
my neighborhood or through the downtown
or encourage curiosity. Those things include:
area of St. Augustine. To me, there is pure
natural settings, different people I meet on
enjoyment in that.
a daily basis, and the array of places I go to
an answer or gain understanding. The "oh, I see" moment. That's fun for me.
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Ask Why RECOGNIZING AND HONORING THE S PA R K O F C U R I O S I T Y W I T H I N
A C O N V E R S AT I O N with J E S S I C A C L A R K
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Words by Margaret Wallis Photos by Sarah Annay
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Eleanor Roosevelt spoke of an abiding respect for the trait of curiosity. She said, “I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity.”
Perhaps Jessica Clark’s fairy godmother got the memo. In her role as an anchor and reporter for First Coast News in Jacksonville, FL, the ever-curious Jessica Clark has created award-winning journalism, garnering two Emmys in 2013 and 2016.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
BEING RECEPTIVE TO CURIOSITY As she mentions her 2016 Emmy, which was awarded for a special 30-minute documentary about the history of St. Augustine, FL, Jessica whispers, “I’m not telling you this so you’ll write about my Emmy,” following the statement up with her hearty and recurrent laughter. Jessica’s incredibly warm—and humble—telling me that she was a little nervous to be interviewed! She’s definitely earned the recognition, though, having covered the St. Johns County and St. Augustine, Florida area longer than any other journalist in the market.
Jessica thanks her father’s curiosity for her decision to pursue a career in broadcast journalism. Her initial plan was to attend Florida State University to study theater, but her father wondered what she might choose to do if she stepped outside her comfort zone and followed unexplored paths. Her dad encouraged Jessica to dig deep and pursue her truth, and she found herself in the communications and broadcast journalism program at the University of Florida, her alma mater. Jessica has been reporting since 1997, and has spent 12 years asking questions and digging for answers in the St. Augustine area.
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Try This at Home Next time you’re trying to muster the confidence to ask a question, consider yourself employed by your curiosity, and use the “I’m a reporter” line as an introduction. If pretending to be a reporter doesn’t sound like fun to you, try this formula: My name is [insert name here], and my curious mind compelled me to inquire — [insert question here].
Covering an array of stories in her work, from issues affecting local people to history to hurricanes, Jessica is driven by her curiosity. She knows her area well, and is quick to ask questions when she’s sees something new, or something out of place. “Don’t you love it when you’re asking a question and you really don’t know what the answer is going to be?”, says Jessica.
C U LT I VAT I N G C U R I O S I T Y Jessica says it’s taken years, and a lot of unexpected answers, to cultivate the ease and confidence she displays on camera, not to mention when she’s approaching strangers in her workout clothes during her free time. “The other day when I was working out in my neighborhood, and I saw something strange going on. So I walked over and said, ‘I know you won’t
The first question that comes to mind is usually a simple
believe this, but I’m a reporter with a TV station—could you
one, one that precedes many questions: Why? “That’s
tell me what’s happening?’”
probably what sparks [curiosity] for me, just, why is that? And if I’m brave enough, then I go over and try and find out,” says Jessica.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Curiosity 101 Jessica’s curiosity has taken her to great heights and unexplored territory, but it’s not necessary to be an Emmy-award winning reporter or experienced archaeological digger to pursue curiosity. You only have to look at the world and wonder “why?” The best part of curiosity is that it doesn’t require you to have all the answers; the heart of curiosity is not knowing. The fun is in looking for the answers! How to Cultivate and Indulge Curiosity: •
Explore the world (or neighborhood) around you. This can be as simple as taking a new path on a daily walk, or exploring a part of your city you haven’t visited.
•
Confidently ask questions — be amazed by the answers, and then ask more questions.
•
Get involved with an organization doing work that interests you.
•
Visit the library and check out a book about something that interests you, or better yet, check out a book that takes the opposite stance of one of your dearly-held ideas.
•
Open your mind to the unexpected.
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The confidence to ask that first question is important. It can
place he wants me to go. I put it in his hands, so I can be open
make us uncertain to question the world around us, especially
to whomever comes my way, and so they can be open to me.”
if we’ve tricked ourselves into thinking we have all the answers. But indulging curiosity by asking questions allows an individual to cultivate a varied wealth of information. Part of curiosity is skepticism; questioning what you know, so you can create a deeper understanding of what’s right and wrong for you.
People aren’t always receptive to her questions, she says, but she concentrates on approaching every curiosity with compassion. She says the best way to approach a person you’re curious about is to talk to them like you’d talk to your mom or your dad “or anyone you love.” She says that this compassionate approach helps her to translate her curiosity
When it comes to asking questions, like with anything else,
into connections, with other people, and with the world
practice makes progress. Stepping outside of your comfort
around her.
zone (and staying open to answers that may challenge your preconceived notions) becomes easier when you regularly allow yourself the freedom to explore new ideas. The more you indulge your curiosities, the more natural it will feel. Jessica cites her faith as another guiding light for her as she looks for answers, and she says a special prayer for strength and guidance each morning. “I ask God to take me to the
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
PERSISTING IN CURIOSITY Jessica’s curiosity goes further than her job as a reporter. She enjoys exploring on foot, whether on the beach or around the city she calls home, and she has another curious hobby: digging up the stories located underground in St. Augustine— the nation’s longest continually occupied European colonial
settlement. Jessica was even awarded a golden trowel from
floorboards of a St. Augustine wine shop to unearth the
the St. Augustine Archaeology Association.
remains of fifteen of St. Augustine’s earliest settlers, who had
This opportunity came to her like any other story might. St.
rested there undisturbed since 1572.
Augustine’s city archaeologist would call her station to have
The skeletal remains of men, women, and children were
archaeological digs covered in the news, and the unearthed
buried on the site, which is known to have been near the first
stories drew her in. She would see artifacts, like nails, and
church in St. Augustine. Jessica was granted the precious
wonder “who hammered those nails? Who were they?” Or in
opportunity to brush the earth from the remains of a female
the case of a particularly surprising artifact, “who made this
settler, whom she lovingly named Maria. “It was fascinating,”
counterfeit Spanish money?”
she said, and also sad, “because she wasn’t an artifact.
Her curiosity led her again, and she made time in her schedule
She was a person.”
to attend the archaeological digs not as a reporter, but as a volunteer. “It’s just dirty curiosity,” she laughs. “I keep digging because I think, what else am I going to find?” That curious persistence matters. As a dedicated volunteer, Jessica was invited in February 2017 to participate in a
Margaret has raised more than half a million dollars for Florida nonprofits and written for online publications, but her dream is to abscond from society to be a beekeeper. She prefers writing with pen and paper and practices calligraphy in her free time. All Photos by Sarah Annay Photography except those on p. 71-73
groundbreaking archaeological dig: one that lifted the
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Don’t you love it when you’re asking a question and you really don’t know what the answer is going to be? – JESSI CA CLA R K
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
to align your innermost thoughts with your ever-evolving perspective
I L L U S T R AT I O N B Y @ D A N U T Z I
San Pedro Cactus
With its healing and hypnotic abilities, the San Pedro Cactus embodies curiosity. This 20-foot-tall succulent serves as a symbol of the curious mind, which shoots for the stars and flourishes with every new experience.
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Real beauty is about being curious and courageous. – REBEKKA REINHARD
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
LIVE
Unapologetic + Nonjudgmental HOW TO BE CURIOUS ABOUT YOUR BODY with Meghan Kacmarcik
By viewing our bodies through childlike curiosity, we can release anxieties and criticisms, and replace shame with acceptance.
W
hen’s the last time you had fun in your body?
rolls, soft patches and lines without judgment was a revolution.
When you didn’t view your body with shame or
Viewing things that would have once made me cower in
embarrassment or will it to change, but sunk
shame—like when I was swollen or when my hair was wild—
into it, unleashed your inner light, and had fun? Pervasive
through the eyes of a child, without judgment, is powerful.
body shame in our culture makes it hard to look at our bodies without a critical eye. If we can shift our perspective, though, and look at our bodies with curiosity rather than shame, we can see our bodies in a new light. I’ve always been unapologetically curious, carrying my childhood “Why?s” into my adult life—albeit mostly in my head. I’m curious about the world, culture, politics…where that latenight host is from and where I can find the best coffee near me. I also view the world without judgment, but for some reason, that open-minded curiosity never carried over to the way I
Our society is particularly quick to judge women’s bodies. Look at the front page of nearly every woman’s magazine and you’ll undoubtedly see one woman’s weight loss or gain, another woman showing signs of age, and a “shocking” photo of a celebrity sans makeup. These magazines reinforce societal ideals that ultimately impede our ability to view anyone’s body, much less our own, without judgment or shame. Panicking over visible wrinkles or a slightly rounded stomach is so widely accepted, it’s
view my body. One of the most magical discoveries of my journey has been approaching my body with that same curiosity. Noticing its
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revolutionary for a woman not to care. Even more so, not to
Part of my journey to body confidence included reframing
talk about it.
nearly all the thoughts I had about my body. “My stomach looks
When we were children, we didn’t have these preconceived notions. Society usually hands them to us as we approach our tween/teen phase. When I was a child, I did not know that being in a larger body was “bad” until I heard people close to
so big today” became “isn’t it interesting how my stomach expands and contracts on any given day”; “I wish my thighs wouldn’t jiggle so much” became “it’s fascinating the way my flesh can move.”
me declare that about their own bodies. I did not know that
Of course, this wasn’t something that came naturally to me
it was unacceptable to have wrinkles too young or to wear a
or even something I felt remotely comfortable with. It was an
bikini if you were over a certain size.
experiment of “fake it ‘til you make it”–one that lasted over
The magic of childhood is the ability of children to look at the world with unbiased eyes. Children can feel complete freedom
weeks and even months. Slowly but surely, I tapped back into that curiosity I’d had as a child.
in their bodies. My six-year-old self was curious about my
Depending on what kind of social media you follow, you’re
wide fingers and the way my backside always stuck out, but
either encouraged to hate your body or to love it. There’s no in
somewhere along the way, I replaced that boundless curiosity
between. Here’s where body curiosity can be so helpful; rather
with shame.
than extreme feelings about your body either way, try viewing your body with fresh eyes and no judgment.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
When we’re not judging every part of our being, we can have fun living in our bodies. Notice the roll of your stomach without criticism. Observe the lines of your face, the wobble of your arms, the widening or thinning of certain parts of your body without disparaging yourself. Notice and breathe; imagine what your six-year-old self would think. Would she judge you? Or would she watch you in wonder at the things you’re accomplishing, the way you move and dance and love?
Meghan is a blogger, body positivity advocate, eating disorder survivor and Registered Dietitian. You can follow along on her adventures on Instagram @sundaesforthesoul or read her blog at sundaesforthesoul.com. Photos by @amandaluisaart
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LIVE
What’s on The Other Side of Curiosity? with Paula Jean Burns
Allowing curiosity into our relationships makes way for experiencing new aspects and personalities of those we hold dear.
A
s adults, we can continue our education and desire to grow and evolve by adopting a mindset of curiosity. How? By simply showing up every
day willing to ask questions, and seeking to learn and understand. Always ready to push ourselves past the edge of our comfort zone for the reward of seeing what’s on the “other-side.” So, why is it that we tend to shy away from curiosity when it comes to some of the relationships in our lives? Why can I easily embrace curiosity when it comes to other aspects of my life? Why can I be curious with some relationships but not with others?
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I have pondered this notion for some time and have settled
A profound realization for me has been that, as my children
on the assumption that curiosity is energizing and exciting
grew older, I’ve been avoiding being truly curious. Of course,
in those areas and aspects of life that are not hitting hard
as a mom, I was most interested in what they were doing, who
on vulnerability. Curiosity in my most vulnerable and
they were hanging with, what they were involved in. When it
intimate relationships can stir feelings that feel threatening
came to really investigating their intimate desires, though, I
and unsettling.
retreated in fear.
This means that the story I’m telling myself about my intimate
I had conjured up my own perception of them—how they would
relationships is that “If I am curious I may come upon some
show up in the world and what their journey would look like.
trait, opinion, feeling, desire that I may not be ready to
Unfair to them, but safe for me. I didn’t want to get curious and
accept or handle. Or worse yet…I may not like it! I want my
really know about the tattoos, music preferences, relationships
understanding and perception of this relationship to be just as
or anything else that might not fit my perceptions.
it is. I know this person and I want my image and perception of who they are to not change.”
Wow…kind of a big deal when I really think about! I was more vulnerable than I was curious with the very people I cherished
There it is! I have decided that curiosity in an intimate
most in life. Once I realized this story I was telling myself, I
relationship such as a spouse, partner or lover could be
could see how limiting this belief could be to growing and
risky. Being curious may require me being playful, open,
nurturing the deep, rich, authentic relationship with my most
inquisitive, spontaneous and that all may lead to a change in
precious loved ones. Ironically, all I really wanted was to
how I perceive any given relationship.
deepen our connection and history of a dynamic open intimate life together. Instead, I was sabotaging the whole thing!
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
So, how did it change? I attribute my evolving to meditation. It
I will always be “momma bear” with my children; I just don't
has been through my Transcendental Meditation Practice that
lead with that anymore. With curiosity as my touchpoint,
I have been able to recognize and release old limiting beliefs
my children and I can both grow, learn, understand and
that no longer serve me; in doing so, I have created a new story
experience new things and opportunities. What we have
for myself.
learned from and of each other has been and will continue to
My new story no longer avoids being curious. I am safe
be amazing.
and secure with asking and exploring my relationship with
And so life has shown me this…CURIOSITY nurtures open
my children. I know that whatever the conversation or
dialogue, creates strong rich connections, and allows us
answer may be, our connection will become stronger just by
to explore our relationships in a bigger, more inquisitive,
communicating. Curiosity will never ever change the fact that
and playful way. Embrace curiosity in your most intimate
I am their Mom and they will need me and I them.
relationships and experience the magic of seeing what’s on the
We can support each other in our life’s journey and have a
“other side.”
trusted safe place in which to share. I now bless the times when I can be with each of my adult children and get into the nitty gritty of life. I feel comfortable asking the more curious, intimate questions as well as sharing my wisdom with them and loving their shared experiences.
Paula Jean’s warm and mindful style is the magnetic combination to help forward-thinking individuals begin living with PURPOSE, passion, and brilliance. Through storytelling, teaching, and her writings, she enables clients and audiences to embrace the importance of living, leading, and leaving a legacy. Connect with her at YourPurposePages.com. Photos by @amandaluisaart
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Advertise with Us Below is a timeline showing our upcoming themes for Series 8 and the deadlines for submitting your ad. Learn more at bit.ly/TPYpartners.
ISSUE 1
ISSUE 2
IS S UE 3
IS S UE 4
DECEMBER 2017
JANUARY 20 18
F E B R UARY 2018
M AR CH 2018
Create Ease by Choosing Comfort
Create Wealth by Embracing Reflection
Create Fun by Unleashing Connection
Create Joy by Celebrating Whimsy
DU E: OCT 1 5 , 2017
DUE: N O V 15, 2017
D UE : D E C 15, 2017
D UE : J AN 15, 20 1 8
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PHOTO BY @WALKERSTUDIOSLLC
– CHR I STI DA N I ELS
Words by Jen Holmes Photos by Sarah Annay T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
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LIVE
If your intuition is calling you to make a transformation, honor it with integrity and grace, realizing that every level of transformation will require a different version of you. Embrace it, and the life you were meant to live, and everything else will take care of itself.
"I keep having this recurring nightmare”, I said to my best friend, staring blankly at the table. “Go on”, she responded after a few moments, clutching her coffee cup and looking at me inquisitively. “I’m standing on a stage in front of a faceless audience, doing every trick I have learned to perform and please but it’s not enough. The crowd is worse than unimpressed, they’re actually painfully embarrassed, annoyed for me having wasted their time. I leave the stage ashamed.” “Wow,” she said, leaning back into her chair and exhaling audibly, “you’ve got some serious unresolved issues going on there!”
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THE IDEAL WOMAN I couldn’t make sense of my friend’s suggestion. I had created a life that looked exactly how it was supposed to look. I was in total control of everything! I had qualifications, I had a career, I owned a home; on paper, everything was perfect. What issues did I possibly need to resolve? As a woman who has only ever known, and played by, the implicit rules of a patriarchal society, I responded
Our dreams exist to show us the gaping hole in our human experience,
in the only way I knew how: I knuckled down to find a
so something was clearly missing to take me onward in my journey.
solution. I knew little beyond having a goal-oriented
Looking back now, I believe I knew what I needed to do in my heart
and linear purpose, so I narrowed my path. There was
of hearts, but I was paralyzed by the prospect of losing control, and
no room for error nor exploration, I consulted the
terrified by the responsibility of becoming who I am, rather than
manual of “shoulds” and executed them with discipline
mimicking who I thought I ought to be.
to a T.
In time, I realized that this shift was happening whether I liked it or not.
I always believed that having an appropriate life
I had two choices: I could go kicking and screaming, or I could find a way
was the formula for happiness, and so I tried to
to make this easier for myself. And so, despite my fear of losing control,
mold myself even more tightly into that hazy ideal
I finally accepted what was missing: my soul yearned to find and explore
woman who always lingers a few paces ahead. As the
breadths of my own wild and curious nature. I secretly longed for the
saying goes, “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”, and I saw
creative chaos of my curiosity, needing its playful, unfolding, and unique
no reason to veer off course now! Yet my conscious
expressiveness in order to move forward.
pursuits couldn’t outsmart my subconscious needs, and I continued to wake almost every night in a cold breathless sweat.
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These feelings led me to wonder if curiosity could have a place elsewhere in my life. What if I were to begin to ask “I wonder why?” of everything before jumping to heavy-handed conclusions? What if I always look at myself and the world with my head cocked to the side? I found my curiosity was breathing life into my instinctual nature.
THE RIPPLE EFFECT At the time, I didn’t have a concrete name for what was happening; in hindsight though, I recognize that I was practicing listening to my intuition by asking questions, being curious; seeing, hearing, integrating, and acting upon what I
THE INSTINCT OF CURIOSITY I started small. One Wednesday evening, on my way to yet another date, I decided, I’m going to stop behaving how I think I should behave, and I’m just going to be myself. The prospect gave me palpitations, yet on giving myself that permission, my curiosity was piqued… How would this go? Despite being out of my comfort zone emotionally, a weight had lifted off my shoulders. I could catch my breath. I felt present in the moment, and instead of constantly introspecting about the ‘rightness’ of my behavior my attention funneled outward. I observed my date with curiosity, wondering, “What is his life like? What’s going on with him?” From then on, I was no longer the pandering good girl. I was teasing, playfully sarcastic, and inquisitive – all character traits
knew to be true. As a result, my life began to transform. Instead of spinning in action-oriented (yet fruitless) circles, feeling anxiety about judgment and persecution from others in so many areas of life—work, friendships, romance—I started to move forward; meandering, but still ever forward. No longer unforgiving of my quirks, I could observe myself compassionately. One day on a work trip in another part of the country, I received a message on a dating app. On paper, I should have ignored it as he lived hours away, but I was - once again - curious. There began a conversation and a facetime, and within a few weeks a meet up. This led to a long distance relationship, cohabitating, then getting engaged and married within a couple of years. How did this happen?
of my most authentic self. Most importantly, I wasn’t seeking
By following the smallest of clues that caught my attention, I
outward approval. The conversation was natural, I listened
gave in to the momentum, the inner warmth, the butterflies.
intently, feeling the resistance to my wild self abate. I left dates
Instead of the usual brick in the stomach, I felt the lightness of
from then on feeling energized, rather than drained.
experiences, and welcomed an infusion of curiosity and fun.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Inspired Instincts
Around this time, I started Curiously You. As I know intimately the confusion and anxiety that comes from
Intuition requires us to make space for inspiration, and creativity requires us to perspire in birthing our creations. Inspiration + Perspiration = Creative Magic! Clear the way for the most intuitive guidance
enduring the approval-seeking cycle, I created Curiously You as a safe space for women to explore their many adopted societal and internalized “shoulds,” so they can start to shed them and step into their own inherent wild and curious nature.
system you have by...
THE CHILD WITHIN 1. Closing your eyes and taking a few deep breaths. 2. Instinctively place your hands on a part of your
In the process of learning to live by the rules of the grownup world, we have shut away our curious inner child. And
body that you feel needs attention and breath
yet, curiosity has a strange familiarity to it, like a great
deeply into your hands, sending energy to this
aunt’s house we used to visit as a child.
part of your body. 3. Listen to anything you feel your body wants to you to know, and with gratitude for your body, and the messages it sends you say, “I am embodied, connected, and in touch with who I truly am.”
Remember those wonderful carefree summer playtimes? Remember giving in to the yearning to run wild? There is a place for the adult self in that childhood world of play and exploration.
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When we incubate an idea, we swill it around in our mind until it magically comes together. Although it feels like you’re not really doing very much, incubation is an essential part of the creative process because it unshackles your mind, and allows your imagination to run wild.
Try it! Go for a walk, take a shower, or spend five minutes lying flat on the floor and let your mind wander. Find any exercise that will encourage the incubation of your creativity.
If we are to grow as human beings, we must problem-solve
Sensing the fear of the child behind, I grabbed her hand and
and continually inhabit a place of curiosity in order to step
told her everything would be ok.
into the expansiveness of our true nature. By stepping into the adventure playground of life, even if tentatively at first, we start to feel and witness the unraveling of the knots tied so long ago. The last time I had my recurring nightmare, I was once again
Holding hands like three daisies in a chain, we swiftly fled through dark corridors of the theatre, out a door into a meadow, and pushed into the unknown, led onward by the brave and curious part of myself.
on stage, sad and ashamed. Unlike every other time, however, out of the front of my body stepped the shadow of a bold and curious child, and out of the back of my body stepped the shadow of another, frightened and nervous child. I recognized both children as aspects of me. The courageous child to the front took my hand and pulled me off stage.
Jen Holmes is the owner of Curiously You, a safe space that encourages natural inquisitiveness of the inner self to bring about personal transformation. She wants women to move past who they feel they “should” be, and start to live a life aligned with their values and desires instead. Connect with her @curiouslyjen on Instagram, or at curiouslyyou.com. Photos by Sarah Annay Photography
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LIVE
EMERGENCE
About our Featured Artist Christy is an artist, encourager and whimsical storyteller of dreams. She believes the solutions are found when we approach with curiosity and solve creatively. This piece Emergence, is a collaboration with and response to nearly 100 people, with whom she discussed the challenges that come with not feeling 'good enough'. @cmjohnsonart / christymjohnsonart.com
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From Selfless to Self-FullTM Self Discovery for Highly Sensitive, Driven Women. www.christidaniels.com
PURPOSEpages – a mindfully centered journal book, in which to record your journey of self-discover y, expression, and creativit y. Begin your legacy at yourpurposepages.com.
The time has come
The time has come for you to live your life wholly, fully, and completely. I'm here to help you be in your body emotionally, intellectually, spiritually, and physically using coaching, breathwork, art, and movement. lydiamandell.com
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MANDELL
Thanks The Perpetual You
We are so blessed to have the following collaborators, stockists, advertising partners, and community friends who have encouraged us to pursue becoming a print publication. Without their support, our magazine would not be what it is today.
IN THIS ISSUE
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Advertising Partners Chantelle Davis-Gray, p. 0 Little Legends, p. 10 Words by Lee Lee, p. 10 OM Pajamas, p. 26 Essential Adornments, p. 33 Cinder + Salt, p. 33
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Milford, CT ShopLovet.com Want to stock our magazine? Visit bit.ly/TPYpartners.
Purpose Works, p. 98 Christi Daniels, p. 98 Lydia Mandell, p. 98
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M A N T R A by K R Y S T A L B R A N D T, P H O T O by W A L K E R S T U D I O S L L C
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