TQC Issue 5. Volume 2. India
TQC
Finally turns 50! event in pix
dirty talk 5.0
IN FOCUS
LIFE DOESN’T STOP AT 50! special FEATURE
TQC’s journey THROUGH COVERS LGBT IN INDIA
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INDIA GETS A QUEER RADIO station
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ISSUE 5 VOLUME 2 INDIA
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the search is on FOR THE NEXT TQC COVER MODEL
event in pix DIRTY TALK 5.0
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lgbt in India INDIA GETS A QUEER RADIO STATION
in focus LIFE DOESN’T STOP AT 50!
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your sunday evening flick THE BIRDCAGE
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special feature TQC’s JOURNEY THROUGH COVERS
from the editor AND TQC FINALLY TURNS 50...
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shaken, not stirred RED WINE SANGRIA
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awareness campaign by MINGLE
for that happy ending POACHED PEARS IN RED WINE
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LGBT FRIENDLY PSYCHIATRISTS, COUNSELORS, SPECIALISTS, ETC
50th Edition Special
TQC. Issue 5. Volume 2. India. Cover model: ‘Zart-Hart’, Pune. Photographer: Ben Contributors: (gaysi), Mingle, Prashansa Gurung and all our photographers & models over the years... Advertisers & event listings: Ananda Counselling, Queer-Ink Layout concept, design, production & publishing: Keith. Keeping an aspirational, yet realistic focus on fashion, music, cinema, trends, books, art, events and much more, "TQC, The Magazine" is definitely not a 'run-of-the-mill' lifestyle resource for its online readers in over 25 countries. This e-zine is a non-commercial publication, is not for sale and is exclusively for private distribution. Views expressed are solely the opinions of the individual authors and do not necessarily represent the opinions of the editorial team of TQC, nor its affiliates. The content of this e-zine may not be suitable for all audiences. The appearance of any person in this ezine, is not to be taken as any indication of the sexual orientation of such persons. TQC respects the copyrights of photographs / images and ensures that due credit of the sources of these are mentioned. www.thequeerchronicle.com, www.facebook.com/tqc.india, www.planetromeo.com/tqc_india, TheQueerChronicle@gmail.com Please print this ezine only if you have to. Help save our planet.
TQC finally turns 50... ‘Respect . Inclusiveness . Integration’. What started as a city-centric newsletter in September 2009 with a few hundred readers, TQC’s online readership recently peaked at over 130,000 in over 30 countries. Our queer readers from across the world have often written in about how TQC has helped them appreciate the pride in being queer, has helped them to connect with like-minded individuals and has even given some readers the courage to come out to their families. Of course, we love our straight readers too! The conscious balance in queer-focused and queer-friendly content is intentional, making it more palatable for our straight readers and to help them realize that other than our sexual preferences, the LGBT community is not really that different.
the community through articles, poems, photographs and so much more. We are truly indebted. Over the past 50 months, we’ve made friends and of course we’ve stepped on some toes. We’ve laughed, we’ve cried and we’ve celebrated. Moreover, we are grateful for the opportunity to play an active part in India’s rapidly changing queer landscape. Thank you for walking this incredible journey with us.
Keith
Founder, Editor - TQC TQC
None of our 50 editions published to date would have been possible without the support and voluntary contributions from 4
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Keith, Founder & Editor - TQC Photo by Jyotika P OCT13
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TQC’s jo THRO E COV sep 2009 to 6
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FEATURE
ourney OUGH VtoERS sep 2013 OCT13
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event in pix
Dirty
Talk5.0 Mumbai, Sept 2013
photos by prashansa gurung
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EVENT IN PIX
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in focus
Life doesn’t stop at 50!
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Model: ‘Zart-Hart’, Pune Photographer: Ben OCT13
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Dating in the gay world is not easy, more so where you have reached a certain age of ‘maturity’. Here are five strategies can help make dating after 50 a little less daunting.
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Confront your fears You’re never too old to find love, but that’s not a message gay men hear very often. The hurdle? The gay male community’s — ageism. Within the gay community, negative stereotypes reinforce the belief that gay relationships are based solely on physical attraction, and that once youth starts to fade, we are unlikely to have any real or lasting relationships. Focus on being your best self, no matter what your age. And remember that the most important characteristics — loyalty, humor, intelligence and compassion — are ageless. If you think you’re too old for love or you stopped believing that you can find someone to love who’ll love you back, think again. Maybe you just stopped believing in the kind of naive love that you can only trust when you’re young. But what about the deeper, more mature love that allows for the wide spectrum of experience and truth? That’s where you should set your sights.
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Embrace your new reality The truth is that you’ve earned your age. You really can own it. Focus on what you’ve gained — rich experiences, accomplishments, survivor skills and wisdom. Your next romantic partner will benefit from all of that, and from your passions for the life that’s in front of you. Give up wishing you could turn back time. Give up trying to be perfect, too, especially if that’s a code word for “young.” Yes, it’s important to take care of your body and your health, but no need to obsess. Instead of trying to be 25 again, get comfortable in your skin. Feel good about your body. That way, when someone touches you, they’ll really feel you, and not a bundle of self-critical tension. Think more about keeping a sparkle in your eyes and less on fighting the fine lines around them.
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Pick your social venues wisely Get off of the sideline and get involved in your passions and interests. For example, if you like the outdoors, join a gay hiking or walking group, and meet men while you get fresh air and exercise. Focus on smaller parties, events centered on hobbies and interests, and volunteer opportunities. And, if you haven’t already, try online dating. Create a profile that reflects who are you, what you want and includes recent photos. Don’t post the online profile by showing off your shiny youth. When it comes to truth in advertising, it’s one thing to shave a couple of years off. It’s another to leave out an entire decade! If you want a real relationship, then be real. Lying raises a serious red flag.
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Be self-aware, not rigid One advantage of age is self-awareness. When you know yourself better, you can quickly size up what you want in someone else. You’re quick to assess if your date wants the same level of relationship as you, whether that’s casual or committed. You recognize dysfunction and mismatches faster now than you did when you were younger. But that doesn’t mean you should be rigid and inflexible. Keep an open mind and try to expand your horizons. Chat with a guy who isn’t your “type” and stretch your boundaries. And so what if he doesn’t immediately strike you as hot and sexy? Now it might be comforting to find a partner who can relate to your experiences and your outlook, and has the same pop culture references you do.
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Realize you can be single and happy Well it’s not a cake walk being gay, single and over 50. It’s not like gay subculture has given us lots of happily dating, older gay male role models. The truth is that sometimes when you want a relationship so badly, you draft the first reasonable candidate. Or you’re miserable because there’s no prospect on the horizon. Neither is a good option. Don’t settle for anything less than chemistry, shared values/lifestyle/ goals, trust, and a growing and abiding friendship. Especially at this stage of life, why would you want a relationship that doesn’t bring you happiness? TQC Adapted from an article by author, Dave Singleton.
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the birdcag YOUR SUNDAY EVENING FLICK
The Birdcage is a 1996 American comedy film directed by Mike Nichols, and star The ‘Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation’ (GLAAD) praised the film for “g Centered around the lives of a mature gay couple, the film celebrates differences
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film
rs Robin Williams, Gene Hackman, Nathan Lane, and Dianne Wiest. going beyond the stereotypes to see the character’s depth and humanity�. s and points out the outrageousness of hiding those differences.
Disclaimer: The photographs are used only to publicise the film and its artists. Photographs are copyrighted and property to their respective owners. OCT13
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Red Wine Sangria shaken, not stirred
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It is a well known fact that wine F&B gets better with age. With red wine as the central ingredient, Sangria is as delicious as it is easy, and it only gets better as you spice it up. INGREDIENTS • 1 - 750 ml bottle of red wine (Cabernet Sauvignon, Merlot, Zinfandel, Shiraz) • 1 Lemon cut into wedges • 1 Orange cut into wedges • 2 Tbsp sugar • 1 Shot brandy • 2 Cups ginger ale or club soda PREPARATION • Pour wine in the pitcher and squeeze the juice wedges from the lemon and orange into the wine. • Toss in the fruit wedges (leaving out seeds if possible) and add sugar and brandy. • Chill overnight. • Add ginger ale or club soda just before serving. • If you’d like to serve right away, use chilled red wine and serve over lots of ice. • Addition ideas: sliced strawberries, diced peaches, a handful of fresh blueberries, raspberries, kiwi slices, a shot or two of gin, brandy or rum, a cup of ginger ale. Prep Time: 5 minutes TQC
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for that happy ending
Poached Pears in Red Wine 32
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Use any red or rose you like or that bottle of wine that’s been collecting F&B dust in the back of your cupboard to create this gorgeous simple ovenfree dessert. Absolutely perfect after that special dinner for two. INGREDIENTS • 4 pears, peeled and left whole • 1/4 cup sugar • 1 bottle of wine - red or rose’ whichever you prefer or have in your cupboard • herbs you like: we use sprig of rosemary, sprig of thyme and lemon zest or you can use cinnamon, clove and nutmeg PREPARATION • Place pears in a pot that fits snugly. Add sugar and herbs to the pot with pears. Cover the pears 3/4 with wine. • Place the pot on the stove with the lid on and bring up to a boil, then lower to a simmer. Let simmer for 10-18 minutes depending on the size of your pears. You’ll know when they are done when a knife slips easily in (just like when boiling potatoes). • Once cooked through remove the pears from the liquid & place in the fridge. Return the pot to the stove and reduce the wine, on a simmer for about 10-15 minutes until it forms a syrup. Be careful not to burn it by reducing too much. • About a minute or two before before the wine syrup is ready give it a taste checking to make sure its not too tart. You may need a little more sugar depending on the sweetness of the wine. • To serve, strain a ladle full of the syrup through a fine mesh strainer directly onto each plate. Top with your pear - either serve whole or sliced in half. Finish with a dollop of fresh whipped cream or mascarpone cream. TQC OCT13
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LGBT IN INDIA
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INDIA GETS A QUEER RADIO STATION At midnight on September 10, India got its first radio station for the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) community. Qradio, which launched in Bangalore, is a unique online radio platform that voices the advocacy, activism and lifestyle dialogue of the LGBT community. Anil Srivatsa, CEO and co-founder of radiowalla.in, who launched the radio station, says while there are several NGOs, support groups and organisations for the LGBT community in India, they haven’t yet had a mainstream media platform. “This is a platform that brings together all the LGBT groups together, as well as a space that would create awareness and acceptance about alternate sexuality, and sensitise non-LGBT people to it and bridge the gap between various sexualities,” Srivatsa explained. He has been planning Qradio, his “pet project” for over a year now. He feels that families of LGBT persons, who often struggle to understand the issue or are homophobic, would find this channel useful to clear their doubts or apprehensions. Besides music, the first week, starting Wednesday, will mainly have three shows: HQO: Celebrating gender fluidity with Vaishalli - coming out stories of LGBT people; Heart to Heart with Inner Sight - a counselling service; and LGBT (Let’s Get Beyond Ties) with John and Sandy. OCT13
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“The LGBT population in India stands at two million. Yet they hardly find any mainstream acknowledgment. So, our programmes are mainly documentary features. We’ll have more talk, less music,” says Sunny Ahuja, general manager in charge of programming and operations. In a week’s time, they will also air debates, discussions and programmes on various subjects affecting the LGBT community, including legal issues. Well, not everything aired on Qradio will be on a serious note. There will be fun shows on work, fashion and lifestyle. For example, Queerilicious with Romal, a live lifestyle show, will start next week. “This will be an entirely fun show, actually celebrating being queer,” host Romal Singh says. The shows and music will be interspersed with nuggets of news and trivia from all over the world about or around alternate sexualities. For example, bits of information such as Oxford dictionary recently including a formal union between partners of the same sex to their definition of ‘marriage’, will be little value-adds for the listener. Presently, English and Hindi will be used predominantly on air, but including programmes in regional languages is being worked on, as well. To listen in, go to www.radiowalla.in TQC 35
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