Volume 34, Issue 6 (Purim 2004) - The Rampage

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Freshly Shaven Boys Varsity Basketball Team Prepares to Ship Off for Tour of Duty in Af ghanistan

Jon Sterman, Ridiculously

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Good Looking Hacker E<traordinaire Did Nol Break into RamP.1ge's

System ,:md Write This

Student Reads the RarnPage Purim Issue, Reportedly Chuckles Twice

�rhe StamPede

Volume XXXIV. umber 6

Article

The Ramaz Upper School

�larch 200�/Purim 5764

Ramaz Fails NYSAIS Evaluation By M.u,well Bryer '0-1

After two ye.us of lop form. "\Ve really size or the student body in prcparotion for a difficult poured oursdvt.·s into this the evt•nt o( a real blaLc. State process,'· said Mr. Goelz, Also incluctC'd was the York. New Association of Independent Coordinator. "'A lot of seemingly transparent Schools cvJlu<ltion, RamJZ effort and pl,mning went effort on behalf of the has not been rcaccredited. into fine tuning the school admini.strntion to impress NYSAIS, the agency that for the visit." NYSAIS with its "Brazilian" gives New York independ­ Unfortunately for the 0ovored lunch menu. ent schools their accredita­ R.1maz community, accrcd­ Furthermore, NYSAIS oHition, S:{'nt a delegation of it.1t-ion was nol granted at cials cited conversations teachers and administra­ the v1sit's conclusion. tors from other high According to M!- Miller schools in the Tew Yori... "there \\CrC many factors ;irea to dc tcrmmc whether thal contributed lo Ramaz Ram•u w,1s ,...•orthy of being tu med down for being r1..•Jccrcditc.-d as a reaccrcditation. No one 1 YSAIS member <ehool. event can be blamed for Despite these The committee dccmed that." remarks NYSAIS officials Ramal. was not. Preparations for last voiced specific complaints month's visit were inte�. ,, hen it c,,me to the school. Among these concerns Comrruttc-es met to root out problems and implement were Ramaz·s mulHplc fire heJp(uJ new policies in drills whid1 would have order to present Rama:z. in sisnificantly reduced t.he

School Hires Student Designer

By Emily Bclfer '05 After weeks of search­ ing for an interior decora­ tor to give Rc1maz ,l fresh look� the administration has selected the school's very own Baruch Shemtov '05 for the job. In response lo the unusually small freshman class this year, the ,,dministration saw redecoration as a way of allrac;ting more students. .. W.: questioned

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whether the small number of applicants was due lo the school's notoriously stressful environment," said Rabbi Rubin, "but, after much consideration, the administration arrived at what we think is ., satis­ fying conclusion. While Ramaz offers its students plenty o( things lo think about, the inslit-ution is not what may be called aes­ thetically up to par." 11,is breakthrough may be the source of decreasing appli­ cJtion rates: Ramaz's interi­ or design is in dire need of some serious rcconfigura­ tion. In order lo boost the size or the applicant pool, Rabbi Rubin said that the administrators "finally just said ii•- Ramaz h:is to hire an interior dccorJtor." A

scJrch began for the proper person lo take on the task. After three weeks o( .!,Carching,, the administra­ tors were desperate and near giving up until a solu(ronturutd on paxr 6)

with various Ramaz stu- all, a member of Amalek. dents as contributors to '111c most interesting con­ their decision. AnothN versation that took place studenl recounted an on,>e• was when a sludenl dote in which a history recounted something about teacher informed his class .i faculty member, a still­ that it would be permissi- born fctus and a b.1t," s.1id blc to run over an old one NYSAIS official. "In English lady crossing a light of these horrific slostreet SC'eing as she is, after (co,,rumcd 011 page SJ

Courtesy of Slammf'r '05 Basking in the glory 0£ a well-pl.iyed game o( Balderdash in which he bested Princess ConsuelJ, Roni Jessleson '0-1 proceeds lo challenge the Cheshire Dt to a duel.

Dress Code Revised

By Maxwell Bryer '04 Ramaz's dress code has alw.1ys bet..'ll a point of con­ tention between the stu­ dent body and the faculty. Bui as of late, the adminis­ tration and the student body reached a point of reconc1li.-itlon ;md ch,1nged the dress code to include such nltcrations as shorts for boys and pants for girls. The new Ra maz drcss code-or lack thereof-will be qu ile lax. For boys, pants or any typc--barring backless chaps--during winier months and shorts or pants during the spring and fall will now be per­ Three-button missible. "polo" shirts, as well as Ice shirts, lank lops and full camou nage shirts will be not only permitted, but encouraged, I-lowever, the tried and true necktie will remain in effect as a staple of the uniform. "C'mon," exclaimed Mr. Miller. '"I-low

cou Id we m good con­ science gel rid of the tic? II really lies the whole thing together." Some changes were implemented on the female uniform as ,,,ell. Knee­ length skirts as well as pants will be permitted. Girls will also be allowed lo wear any kind of te<.�shirts and lank tops to school. AII varieties of (ootwear arc now considered appropri­ ate attirc--as long as socks are worn. \>Vhcn ques­ tioned about these lruly monumental conCl"Ssions, Rabbi Go)dminlz sighed, "What can I say, Eric Taub and his organization drove a hard bargain." administration The reached the agreement with a student special interest group, Students Against Dress Code ch,,ired by Eric Taub '07 (SAD). The dress code

reforms that arc the result of these ncgoliations are effective on March 25, a week before spring brc.1k. When asked about his organization's involvement in the r�1dical rcform:.tion of the dress code, Taub stal­ ed simply, "the negotiations were actually quite short and lo the point. Let's just say l made the administra­ tion an offer they couldn't refuse." Whatever the opinion on the new drcss code may be, one thing is for certain; ii will most definitely put f..1r. Goetz and Rabbi Goldminlz--long feared as the "dress code police"-oul o(. business, along with their lradcmnrk phrase, "excuse me. ple..isc get dressed." Come March 25, if a teacher tells you to put some clothes on or gel dressed, scoff not-he or she is probably serious.


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