KIT.DAVID.INTERVIEW.0912

THE ROEPER SCHOOL COMMUNITY MAGAZINE

Keeping In Touch

WELCOME! David Feldman Head of School Volume 5: 5 fall 2012

KIT

Eleanor Gamalski

Class of 2011 Development Office Intern

AN INTERVIEW WITH DAVID When Denita Banks-Sims asked me if I would like to interview David Feldman for Keeping in Touch, she knew I would jump at the opportunity. After missing out on the search process, I was unbelievably excited to get a chance to meet the new Head of School. But I reserved my judgment. Who was this David Feldman? What was he planning to do with my school? I’d heard that he’d been sneaking down to camp lunches to chat with kids, so he couldn’t be too bad. But it wasn’t until my interview with David that I realized the Search Committee had really hit the nail on the head.

Since you’re working in education, I’d like to know what your educational experience was like and what you were like as a student.

My mother would tell you that I was going to be a third grade dropout. School for me, at the very beginning, was very difficult. I started out my school years taking speech classes — I slurred my esses — and it just so happened that I took those speech classes when reading groups were meeting. I started out as a very good reader, but because I was missing the reading groups, my teacher moved me down in reading level. I took it to heart. I felt embarrassed by it. I didn’t even tell my parents because I felt publicly humiliated by it. And I developed a real dislike for school.

My cousin was a school head at an independent school in Chicago. He told my parents that a change of venue — from Chicago public schools to a small private school — might rekindle my love of school. And truth be told, it did. I went from not wanting to go to school to loving school. Getting to know my teachers and being in a small, intimate group of friends and professionals — it really made me come to appreciate school again.

As I moved through that school, my sixth grade Social Studies teacher had a huge impact on me. He gave me the first book that I remember reading cover to cover. It was To Kill a Mockingbird. It was the first time I remember a teacher thinking of me as someone bright and capable. Up until then I just sort of went along and passed through grades, but he thought of me as something more. He was my basketball coach, so I got a chance to know him outside of the classroom. We formed a really nice friendship.

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When I graduated from college, he was a principal of the same school and invited me to come and teach. I said, “No, no, I don’t want to teach. I’m going to be a lawyer.” And he asked, “Well, how are you going to pay for law school? Rather than taking out loans, why don’t you teach and then you can go to school in the evening?” And that’s what I did — I went to law school at night and taught during the day. I really took to law school well my first year. I loved it deeply. I was passionate about it. But over time, I found myself spending more time thinking about my students and less about the cases I was supposed to be briefing. I found myself becoming a teacher and falling in love with the classroom.

Wow, that’s a great story. So, how did you then make the transition from being a teacher to thinking that you might want to be a part of running the school?

I think it has to do with the way I think. I’ve always been someone who needs to see the whole. So as I worked within the school, I began to think — how did my small piece of the classroom fit into the bigger setting? It was never really separate from the classroom for me, but it gave me a bigger sense of what the whole school operation was about, and that was energizing. Even as I moved more into administration, I never stopped teaching. In both of my headship positions that I’ve had previously, I continued to teach. And I love that! I love being able to connect with students like that. I love for faculty to see me as a teacher — to know that I understand the challenges of the classroom and the gifts that come from being in the classroom. A mentor of mine once said that when you move into administration, you never leave teaching — your students are just a little bit older, and the problems are a little more complex.

“David has a deep understanding of the life of learners and sees the school’s role as sustaining that optimism and enthusiasm throughout the school year.”

Leslie Hosey, Chair of the Search Committee

When I looked into your other schools, I’ve noticed they share a common thread of “education for life” — the idea that it’s not just important to acquire knowledge in the classroom but also to develop as a human being and a student. Why do you think that aspect of “education for life” is important?

Yeah, it’s not an accident that I came to Roeper!

That’s a theme that runs through my career.

We spend so much time looking at school as preparation for a test, or the next grade level, or going to college, or going to work, or going to business. I’ve always loved learning because it was interesting. Yes, along the way you go through different grade levels, and yes, you go through different careers and jobs — but I never thought of school as prep. School was about how you think and how you become a thinker and how you give rein to your curiosity. It makes you an interesting person, and it makes you alive. It gives your life direction.

One of the things that I took away with such depth from my time with Annemarie was — here is someone who is truly a lifelong learner.

At 93 years old, she was as vital a thinker as I’ve ever met. If I should be fortunate enough to live that long, that would be what I want — to have that opportunity to have my brain functioning that deeply and to have that kind of curiosity. She said to me when I first met her, “I’ve written this book on death and dying, and I’ve finished it. What shall I do next?” Can you think of anything clearer about a lifelong learner than “What’s the next project? What’s the next thing?” It’s that curiosity about the world around us.

How do you think that mission — of fostering lifelong learning and deep thinking — can translate into a student’s daily life?

Well, I think you look at the structures that we’ve built here at this school. It’s not an emphasis on grades and test scores, right? It’s about learning for its own sake. In many ways that’s going against what the world around us says we should be doing. But I think that’s what makes us strong. It’s what makes the people here interesting. It’s what makes them able to shift and change as the world around us shifts

and changes. I just read a wonderful piece in The New York Times about how the top ten jobs today didn’t exist ten years ago.

So what are we preparing people for? I think you prepare people for the world. To think.

To be creative. To be curious. So that, whatever comes next, you can shape it. You’re not shaped by it.

Yeah, I definitely think that perspective is extremely important to us at Roeper. But then, as a school, you also have to meet the demands of enrollment and the outside world’s expectations. You know, they’re looking for the top SAT scores, even if that’s not necessarily what we want to emphasize. So, as an administrator, how can you balance those needs?

I think you go back to the notion that I’m not just an administrator — I’m a teacher. So I have an obligation to teach why this philosophy works. Not just teaching students, but teaching adults, teaching parents, and teaching the broader community why this philosophy of education is the direction we need to go. No, it’s not simple, and no, it’s not common. It’s not what the public schools do. But we’re producing successful leaders as a result of this. The students who go through our program come away having the ability to share their thoughts and ideas. They’re the ones who are going to shake the future, and it’s because of this way of thinking. It’s not because of an SAT score. We can debate long and hard what an SAT score really means, or what the difference between an “A” and a “B” is. But what’s more important is your ability to think deeply and to be curious about the world around you.

A friend of mine talks about the difference between public schools and private schools.

He says it’s like the difference between a fivestar restaurant and McDonald’s. You go to McDonald’s, and you know exactly what you get, right? And no matter where you go in the world, the meal is the same. You will eat the meal, and you will be full. Now, what’s the nutritional value? Did you enjoy the meal? Is the meal made for you? Is it unique to your needs, your likes, and your tastes? The beauty of a small school like Roeper is you can tailor the education to meet the needs of the individual.

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Should all schools be like that? I think so. Can we get there? I doubt it. It takes a lot of hard work and a lot of investment, money and time.

Teaching the way we teach is harder. It’s a lot simpler to say, “Read these pages,” than it is to really listen, and argue, and debate with students.

As you may have realized, Roeper kids like to talk a lot, and they want to have their opinions heard. I’m not sure how much opportunity you’ve had to speak with students so far, but I’d be interested to know what you’ve learned from your conversations.

I like to think of myself as a good listener. I like to know what people are thinking and what their ideas are. I think what struck me and excited me the most about Roeper students was their voice. That they have one — which is so rare. Where does that come from? You know, you don’t just show up one day and have a voice. That happens over time. So what struck me was the beauty of the process — starting in Stage I, children are given choice and decisionmaking power even at three and four years old.

And that carries through, so that at 17 and 18, you’re on the Board of Trustees, you’re involved in hiring faculty, you’re talking on committees about important decisions that run the school.

That’s incredible that that process exists, and it’s exciting for me to be in the middle of it. It will probably take some time to understand and fully appreciate because it is rare. It will take some time for me to trust! I love the idea. I’m excited by it. But it’s not something I’ve seen a lot!

What about your new position most excites you?

There are lots of things. There’s an intensity about this place that excites me. There’s nothing passive about it. That will be challenging, and that will be exciting all at the same time.

I guess what’s most exciting is to be around a community of learners, a community of scholars. I’ve been in great schools. I’ve been in wonderful places where large numbers of people cared about teaching and learning. But

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I don’t think there’s a person here who’s not passionate. That can be overwhelming to me.

It’s also incredibly stimulating. So, it’s the people.

That’s my favorite thing, too. Okay, I guess these are my fun questions. What’s your favorite book?

It’s To Kill a Mockingbird for all of the reasons that I told you. I love to teach it. It’s one of those books that every time — and I’ve taught it a dozen, 15 times — every time I teach it I see something new or learn something more about myself and about the characters of the book.

So I love that book in particular. I think I went to law school because I want to be Atticus Finch.

Oh, well, who doesn’t?

Yeah — everyone wants to be Atticus!

I don’t know how much you’ve gotten to explore, but have you found a favorite spot on campus?

The first time I walked into the gym in the Community Center, my eyes got wide. That is a beautiful, beautiful space. But I think the place that I’ll probably spend the most time — and I’ve already warned Elaina Holsey about it — is downstairs with the Stage I kids. The job of Head of School comes with a variety of stresses, and there are times when you get pulled into the minutiae and the business of running a school. When that happens, you’ll find me on the floor playing with the Stage I kids. Because that’s reconnecting. That’s the reminder of why I’m here and why I’m doing what I’m doing. When I need that dose of reality, that’s where you’ll find me.

That’s something I’d like for the school, too.

As an older student, every time I got to interact with the little ones was one of my best experiences at Roeper.

What’s probably equally interesting is that they remember it — as well as you — as one of the

Former parent Bobby Alcott joined us after the interview for a photo shoot with David and his wife, Elane. At the end of the shoot, Bobby told us that when he first visited the school, he heard Randall Dunn speak, and he knew within seconds that his family was meant to be at Roeper.

David replied, “It was the same for us.

One blink — and that was it.”

important points of their lives — that an older student cared about them and wanted to spend time with them. I think one of the things that I’ll want us to work on as a school are ways in which younger students and older students can spend more time together. Those types of moments are deep memories for both participants.

I think we have to work harder to facilitate those discussion times. Everyone’s so busy, and I think there’s a feeling that it’s taking time off from learning to make those moments happen.

But it’s not!

That is the learning. F

A couple weeks after the interview, I visited the Head’s Office to catch up with David. I noticed aloud that To Kill a Mockingbird was perched on his mantle. He smiled and told me it was the same copy his teacher gave him years ago. He said he would keep it there as a reminder.

Later that day, I had the pleasure of interviewing Elane Feldman. We chatted about her career path, David, and her children, Amber and Lark.

I know you’ve worked in education as well.

What brought you to that path?

Well, I was looking for a place to live, and I had a friend who lived in Chicago who owned an apartment building. So I moved there. My older daughter, Amber, was in second grade.

There was a school close by that my friend recommended, and I went there and enrolled her. It was a private independent school and she fit right in. I started working for the school when our youngest daughter, Lark, was going into kindergarten. I had been doing secretarial work out of my home, and I got a call from the school. It was the business manager, and I thought he was calling about my tuition. I said, “Steve, I don’t have any money right now!”

And he said, “That’s not why I’m calling! Dan [the Head of School] wants you to come in and interview for a job.” So I went in and got the job, and I was there for eight or nine years. So that was my first introduction — my real introduction — to private schools because I learned how the school operated then. I learned a lot about independent schools.

I know you guys are Midwesterners by birth, but you’re newly settled in this area — so are there any places in the Detroit or Metro area that you’re looking forward to visiting or exploring?

All of it. I want to see the shoreline here.

I know there is one somewhere — where is it?

Let’s go see it! So we may do that soon.

I went to Eastern Market with a group of high schoolers on the last day of school, and I want to go back when it’s Saturday — when it’s really rolling. F

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KIT

David on meeting Elane, and Amber and Lark Elane was the assistant to the head of school at my first school. I was responsible for doing some work after school — supervising students when it was time for them to get picked up and making sure that their rides got there. So I was doing after school duty, and Lark would wait for her mom to finish work. She was about five at the time, and she would come downstairs and hang out with me. The middle school girls started to tease her, saying that she was my “girlfriend.” And at some point along the way, they made some sort of bubble gum wrapper ring so that we were “engaged.” It was very cute. So now that we were engaged, she had to introduce me to her mother. She took me up to the office — her mom had just started working at the school a few months earlier — and that’s how Elane and I met. F

In the next couple weeks, I communicated with Elane’s daughters over email. Although David is not their biological father, he’s been instrumental in their lives. “I married their mom when they were eight and four, — so,they’re mine,” David explained. Lark, 31, lives in Oakland, California, and Amber, 35, lives in Washington, D.C. Both are graduates of independent schools. Amber attended the Latin School, where former Roeper Head Randall Dunn currently works, and Lark attended University of Chicago Laboratory Schools while David taught there.

What was your education like?

Tell us a little bit about your work.

Lark Up until the end of high school, I always attended a school where either one or both of my parents was employed. Both of these schools were small, and the net effect was that I couldn’t get away with anything. My parents didn’t push me to be something I wasn’t, but they made sure that I met my potential. Once I went off to college, I found I was well prepared to manage my time. Relatively speaking, I found getting through my bachelor’s and master’s degrees pretty straightforward because of the groundwork laid in my earlier education.

Lark With a very brief stint in adult mental health, since finishing my master’s work I have always worked in foster care and adoption. I manage families that already have children placed with them, and I also train and write home studies for families that are looking to adopt or foster.

Amber It was characterized by small schools and attentive, committed teachers. I got a very strong foundation — especially in writing — that serves me well to this day.

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Amber My mom asked me this question back when I was doing scientific research in neuroscience. What I did then sounded very exciting — I investigated the genetic basis of behavior — but she wanted to know what I did day-to-day. I thought for a bit and told her, “I sit at a computer and figure things out.” Not very exciting, right? Now it’s the other way around. What I officially do sounds boring and bureaucratic: I work in the Budget Division at the National Science Foundation. But what I

A PARENT’S VIEW— on Lark ­— Elane Horses are really Lark’s first love in life. I think her husband comes second.

David She’s fallen off a horse on three continents!

On Amber — David Amber did a post-doc in Washington, D.C., with the Rats of NIMH. We used to joke that she spent all her time with depressed rats and manic mice all in the name of research. I remember asking her how you know if a rat is depressed, rather than telling me that they’re bred that way, she told me that they dropped them in water (in the name of science).

The rats that didn’t struggle — those were the depressed rats. Thanks, Amber!

Elane Amber is much more extroverted than I — I admire that.

She’s really a lot like David in that respect.

They’re very good sparring with each other, whether it’s channeling Shakespeare or Monty Python.

And he’s turned her into a fine and knowledgable baseball fan.

She and Lark have always had wonderful friends — and many mutual friends between them — some who have shown up at our Thanksgiving table through the years. I feel like they’re family, and I hope they feel the same.

do day-to-day is a lot more engaging — I talk to people all around the Foundation and the government, and I think about things like: What are our goals as an agency? What can we do with the resources we have? How do we communicate our successes to our stakeholders — like Congress?

What would we be surprised to know about David?

Lark All my attempts at blackmail regarding this question have failed. Though he is not above cheating at card games played with five-year-olds, for some reason David refuses to purchase a pony or an iPad for a positive response to this question, which both my sister and I found surprising. So, I have come up with a short list: 1. David will eat blue food, despite what he tells you, if the children raise enough money for charity.

2. David does a very good Teletubby imper- sonation.

3. He is not kidding when he bans all White Sox paraphernalia from the school. You think he is, until he makes you turn your shirt inside out or confiscates your hat.

4. Some years ago, he was playing in a facul- ty/student basketball game. He got into a tough spot in which he had to either twist on his knee or fall on an 8th grader. At 6’4”, falling on an 8th grader is no small decision, and of course, he chose to twist his knee.

He tore his ACL in that move, which required surgery later. Let nobody claim that David does not sacrifice for his students!

Amber I have to disagree with Lark about one thing: I wasn’t surprised that he refused to be blackmailed. I believe his exact words were, “I don’t negotiate with terrorists.” So instead, I think I should warn you what you’re in for — things that may not have come up in the interview process. His Monty Python fandom for example. He can recite much of the movie Monty Python and the Holy Grail from memory, as well as many (many, many, many) of the Monty Python TV show sketches and songs.

Any kid wishing to get his attention should shout after him in the hallway, “Old woman!” or “Your mother was a hamster!” Also, it’s not really that he is a White Sox hater as much as he is a die-hard Cubs fan. If you want to catch him on a good day, check the baseball results: a day with a Cubs win and Sox loss is the best situation. F

Elane, David, Amber and Lark on the occasion of Amber’s receiving her Ph.D. from Northwestern.

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Eleanor Gamalski graduated from Roeper in 2011. She has worked as an intern in Roeper’s Development Office for the past three summers. She is in her second year at the University of Michigan. F