The Round
FALL 2011
Issue V
The Round
Sticks, Maggie Tobin Oil on Vellum , 10” x 12”
FALL 2011
Issue V
No poet, no artist of any art, has his complete meaning EPSRI ,MW WMKRMÁGERGI LMW ETTVIGMEXMSR MW XLI ETTVIGMEXMSR of his relation to the dead poets and artists. You cannot value him alone; you must set him, for contrast and comparison, among the dead. I mean this as a principle of æsthetic, not merely historical, criticism. The necessity that he shall conform, that he shall cohere, is not one-sided; what happens when a new work of art is created is something that happens simultaneously to all the works of art which preceded it. The existing monuments form an ideal order EQSRK XLIQWIPZIW [LMGL MW QSHMÁIH F] XLI MRXVSHYGXMSR of the new (the really new) work of art among them. The I\MWXMRK SVHIV MW GSQTPIXI FIJSVI XLI RI[ [SVO EVVMZIW JSV order to persist after the supervention of novelty, the whole I\MWXMRK SVHIV QYWX FI MJ IZIV WS WPMKLXP] EPXIVIH ERH WS the relations, proportions, values of each work of art toward XLI [LSPI EVI VIEHNYWXIH ERH XLMW MW GSRJSVQMX] FIX[IIR the old and the new. Whoever has approved this idea of order, of the form of European, of English literature, will RSX ÁRH MX TVITSWXIVSYW XLEX XLI TEWX WLSYPH FI EPXIVIH F] XLI TVIWIRX EW QYGL EW XLI TVIWIRX MW HMVIGXIH F] XLI TEWX %RH XLI TSIX [LS MW E[EVI SJ XLMW [MPP FI E[EVI SJ KVIEX HMJÁGYPXMIW ERH VIWTSRWMFMPMXMIW T. S. Eliot
Table  of  Literary  Art
Holding the Tongue F] )PM^EFIXL 1IX^KIV ........1 Translation of Antonello Borra F] &PSWWSQ /MVWGLIRFEYQ .22 confrontation with the landscape F] 6EGLIP )GSRSQ] Training Wheels F] 1MGLEIP +SSHQER That day we watched streets move like islands F] 1EHIPIMRI 3¸2IMPP 43 a barnloft of horse dreams F] /IZMR 4MVIW ......45 Now That We’re Single F] 1SI^ 7YVERM Translation of Alessandro de Francesco F] &IPPI 'YWLMRK 1EQQSR EX ;MRà IPH 4EVO F] .YWXMR ;]QIV +MZMRK 1EV] E 4MERS 0IWWSR F] .IWWMGE =SYRK I heard her practicing piano, and this is what I thought: F] .IWWMGE =SYRK ,YVV] 9T 4PIEWI -X¸W 8MQI F] Lucy Kissel........ 4IRIPSTI F] 7EVEL (EP]
The  Round
4LSXS 8VERWJSVQEXMSR F] )PM^EFIXL ,S[SVX ..........81 Max Brod Dreams F] 0MP] 1I]IV ..................................83 San Andreas F] Sylvia Linsteadt...................................... 4SIQ SJ 8VMFYXI F] 0YGMPPI 'PMJXSR
Table  of  Visual  Art
Sundog F] 1EKKMI 8SFMR 6IĂ‚IGXMSR F] 1EKKMI 8SFMR Fog F] 1EKKMI 8SFMR Heart F] &VMHKIX 7EYIV Floating Ghost F] Eleanor Leonne Bennett......... Stepladders F] Eleanor Leonne Bennett
Shot Down F] Eleanor Leonne Bennett Whim F] 1E]E 1EWSR Crumbling Statue F] 1E]E 1EWSR
In memoriam Blossom Kirschenbaum
Holding the Tongue
)PM^EFIXL 1IX^KIV I. He had a tick, not his eye But in his eye, something always ticking A dial in the white, a clock Breaking could make him cry Keep the clocks working, the clocks 3R XLI [EPP WMPIRGI 1EHI QI RIVZSYW EW E GLMPH )ZIV]FSH] MW QMWWMRK SRI XLI IRH JVE]MRK XLI XETI RS PSRKIV WXE]MRK E VIXMVIH [MRXIV FSSX -X MW IEW] XS EWO JSV [LEX ]SY EPVIEH] LEZI % GYT SJ ÂSYV QMPO# 1I =SY FYVRIH XLI XSEWX 1SXLIV ,I PMOIW MX FYVRIH +YMPX 7LEQI 8LI] EVI RSX W]RSR]QW FYX JSV QI FSXL QIER a fear of dying, facing death without anyone else. Alone at home, if I can fall asleep, every car shrieking is a plane through my window through my dream, every siren is a FSQF XLVIEX IZIV] QMWWIH GEPP ER ERRSYRGIQIRX SJ E HIEXL 7XST FIMRK WS HVEQEXMG =SY EVI RSX QMWIVEFPI WE] sad. It is only a matter of when. Soon you will call this misery once
1
Holding the Tongue, Elizabeth Metzger
upon a time when you still were happy.
7MPIRGI -W MX ER]XLMRK QSVI XLER E PMRI FVIEO#
7SQIXMQIW - PSSO EX XLI IHKIW SJ ÁRKIVW ERH XLMRO SJ GSRXMRIRXW XLI TPERIX X[S LERHW [VETTIH EVSYRH ER EFWIRX center. Sometimes WLI [LMWTIVIH MR +IVQER YRHIV LIV FVIEXL (]MRK 7XVERKIV -J ]SY [IVI Q] WSR [LEX [SYPH ]SYV REQI FI# )]IW FILMRH XLI FIHVEMP PMOI REMPW -R XLI GEV 'LMGEKS 'EVSPMREW - JSVKIX XLI GMXMIW REXMSREPW GEQTW JSV XLI KMJXIH GLIWW XVSTLMIW %PP XLI FSVHIVW [I HVSZI XS GVSWW 8LIVI [EW RSXLMRK EFSYX ]SY XS PSZI [L] EVI ]SY ] V Y ] V Y ;L] EQ - [LEX# 7LI [EW RSX GV]MRK ]IX ,IVI ]SY WEMH FIEX [L] EVI ]SY LIVI - FIKER XS LEXI ZIMRW XLIR LS[ XLI] NYQT ERH XIRX YT XLI skin. - EHQMX - EHQMVIH ]SYV UYMGO GSQFMREXMSRW SJ WXVSRK V¸W XLI raging open mouth talking over your face. =SY XSSO QI XS XLI FEGO SJ XLI WXEMVW - XLSYKLX QE]FI XLMW XMQI ]SY [SYPH QSVI XLER TYPP Q] LEMV 2IZIV HSR¸X ORSGO 2IZIV HSR¸X ORSGO ;L] MW WLI FPIIHMRK [L] EVI ]SY FPIIHMRK 7LI¸W E [SQER ]SY WEMH ]SY¸VI RSX
2
The Round
When we shared a room, it was you who turned off the lights, and I would pretend sleep until you did and when you did, quietly open my eyes study my hands, playing them FEGO ERH JSVXL EFSZI YRXMP Q] I]IW HMPEXIH ;LSPI FPEGORIWW Then I knew they were moving, all colorless shape. This GSYPH FI RSXLMRKRIWW - KYIWW XS WII RSX XLI EVQW FYX [VMWX XS ÁRKIV FSYUYIXW FMVHW PIXXIVW GEQIVE JVEQIW 2SXLMRK [EW EW UYMIX EW - [ERXIH MX XS FI )ZIR MR ]SYV WPIIT ]SY FPMROIH ,I (SIW WLI XEPO XS LIVWIPJ RS[ 1I - HSR¸X ORS[ - HSR¸X PMZI LIVI ER]QSVI ,I 7YVI ]SY HSR¸X ]SY¸VI EP[E]W LIVI ]SY¸PP RIZIV PIEZI ;LIVI¸W XLI GPSGO#
When they sent him what they mean is they drove him, WS QE]FI SRI GSYPH WE] XLI] PIJX QI# - WLSYPH RSX PMOI XS FI TMXMIH FYX XLI [IEXLIV XLI WSKK] GIVIEP XLI ÂMGOIVMRK WXVIIXPMKLX EPP VIQEMRIH XLI WEQI 8LIVI [MPP FI TIEGI MR XLMW LSYWI TIEGI SJ QMRH QSXLIV XSPH QI RSX XS WE] KSSHF]I to say see you, not later soon, see you soon. I pricked the [SVHW MR WMPIRGI XLVSYKL Q] PMTW ;LIR LI WEMH F]I XLI] were sewn tight. It was like any other day. Bye, he said. No SRI [ERXIH XS WGVEXGL JEXLIV¸W GEV I live too much in the past. I am too young to do so. Too much in the future. If you plan too much you miss the living.
3
Holding the Tongue, Elizabeth Metzger
7XST SZIVXLMROMRK XLMW - [ERX XS WE] SO ERH [LEX EFSYX when I run out, a hand amputated, a tongue unlatched, the ZSMGI FS\ I\GEZEXIH =SY EVI RSX ER LSYVKPEWW )PM^EFIXL 0MJI HSIWR¸X VYR through you like that. You have to. - LEH E JVMIRH 'EVSPMRI EP[E]W E LIEH XEPPIV XLER QI E dreamer. We imagined every person as some part of a made up galaxy, a universe of new constellations. Who says we cannot connect the stars in different ways and see what we say we see. 3RI HE] WLI [SYPH RSX GSQI SZIV FIGEYWI Q] FVSXLIV WGEVIH LIV - LEXIH LIV JSV XIPPMRK QI 'S[EVH - WEMH 7LI said, he scares you too.
4IVMTLIVEP ZMWMSR SJ QIR XLI K]Q XIEGLIV [MXL XLI FPYI FIERFEK MR LMW TERXW [LIR [I TPE]IH GETXYVI XLI ÂEK the doctor who patted my thigh, the teacher who told me I needed two more colors on my plate, the one who said %RRI SJ +VIIR +EFPIW [EW RSX ETTVSTVMEXI JSV Q] EKI ;LMXI¸W RSX E GSPSV LS[ EFSYX E TMIGI SJ JVYMX# 8LIR [LEX MW MX# - HMHR¸X EWO FYX XSSO XLI JVYMX ERH HMHR¸X TIIP MX 'ER - LEZI E TMIGI SJ TETIV# )PM^EFIXL LEW TVSQMWI FYX RIIHW LIPT GYXXMRK WXVEMKLX ERH drawing circles. Straight edge, compass. Her houses slant ERH LIV QSSRW VIZIEP E PEGO SJ GSRXVSP 4IRGMP KVMTW TVEGXMGI Her hands need to learn to move with her thoughts. It will JVYWXVEXI LIV PEXIV ;I¸H PMOI XS WII LIV EVQ VEMWIH QSVI
4
The Round
next year and hear her voice complete questions with more GSRÁHIRGI 7LI WXMPP WIIQW XIVVMFP] YRGIVXEMR The advantages of remaining only in fragments might go WSQIXLMRK PMOI XLMW …The door swung open, night… Without you has come, an empty guest… … 3V XS WTIEO MR EPPIKSV] *SV LMQ ]SY PMZIH XS FI TYRMWLIH EW MJ IZIV] [SQER swallowed her conscience and trusted a snake. 0MOI XLMQFPIW EKEMRWX WI[MRK RIIHPIW MR XLI PETW SJ WMPIRX [SQIR WSQI HEVO FMVH WMRKMRK E LEVQSR] SZIV ERH SZIV MXWIPJ 8LI [SQIR KS GETWM^MRK XLIMV JEFVMGW XYVRMRK XLIMV palms inside them, memorizing their stitches, stitching their hems to their shins. 7SQI ZSMGIW GEVV] [MXLSYX ;MXL IEWI XLI] ÁPP YRGYVXEMRIH VSSQW 3FNIGXW SJ YRGIVXEMRX] MRGPYHI IQFVSMHIVIH FIH WOMVXW FVYWLMRK LEVH[SSH -VMHIWGIRX ÁWL WGEPIW SR E KYXXMRK XEFPI XLI XLSVR SJ E ZMRI 3XLIVW KS YRRSXMGIH PMOI XLI FIH in the guest room. Listening amounts to this, half a riddle, a cracking ten-cent whistle.
5
Holding the Tongue, Elizabeth Metzger
WTIEOMRK SJ [LMGL ;LIR WLI JSVKIXW QSXLIV XIPPW LIV XS VIQIQFIV XS HVIEQ [LIR WLI GERRSX VIQIQFIV QSXLIV WE]W XLI HVIEQ [MPP *SK SR [MRHS[ QIXVSRSQI SJ E TMERS [EXGL 8LI FIEX SJ realizing a watch has stopped. The loss of a strange Aunt.
Losing is some removal of other XLER XLI SFNIGX XLI] WE] throats might close [LIR XLI PSWW MW ÁRKIVW Today when I see the grass MJ ]SY GER GEPP MX KVEWW FILMRH XLI LSYWI the word forlorn even the green WYVVSYRHIH F] [LMXI PSSOW VIQSZIH from the present winter
% XLSYWERH XLMRKW GER FI LIPH SR E ÁRKIV %R I]IPEWL E splinter, silence that threatens a storm. It happens again, [LEX LETTIRIH FIJSVI 8LI WIGSRH EJXIV XLI WIGSRHW LEZI passed. Some languages (Bangla, Tamil, Sanskrit, Icelandic, Ancient +VIIO LEZI E middle voice 8LMW MW E WIX SJ MRÂIGXMSRW SV GSRWXVYGXMSRW XLEX MW XS WSQI I\XIRX HMJJIVIRX JVSQ FSXL XLI EGXMZI ERH TEWWMZI ZSMGI 8LI QMHHPI ZSMGI MW WEMH XS FI FIX[IIR FIGEYWI XLI WYFNIGX SJXIR GERRSX FI GEXIKSVM^IH EW IMXLIV EKIRX SV TEXMIRX FYX QE] LEZI IPIQIRXW SJ FSXL :MSPIRGI ERH WYJJIVMRK -X QE] I\TVIWW [LEX [SYPH FI ER
6
The Round
MRXVERWMXMZI ZIVF MR )RKPMWL *SV I\EQTPI MR The clock broken in the kitchen, broken MW W]RXEGXMGEPP] EGXMZI FYX WIQERXMGEPP] TEWWMZI -X QE] FI E [E] SJ LMHMRK FILMRH SRI¸W MRNYVMIW XEOMRK VIWTSRWMFMPMX] JSV ERSXLIV¸W EGXMSR EZSMHMRK WIPJ TMX] 8LI QMHHPI ZSMGI SJXIR LEW E VIÂI\MZI WIRWI XLI WYFNIGX acts on or for itself, such as The boy hurts himself or The boy hurts. She knows the dead thing to the quick like a stopped vowel. 3R XLI [MRHS[WMPP E PIXXIV STIRIV MHPI ÁRHW LIV WQMPI MR XLI FPEHI When they say trick yourself, tricks up the sleeve, E FEK SJ XVMGOW XLMW - LEZI RSX [VMXXIR E WIRXIRGI MR HE]W XLI SRIW - FIKMR JIIP PMOI GEXGLMRK HIEH ÁWL MR Q] LERHW SV RMKLXQEVIW SJ JIXYWIW 8LI] ÂSEX MR XLI FVEMRPMKLX ;LIR XLI] EVI KSRI it smells of rot. I want them hid, who would want to claim XLIQ# *MRKIVW ÂEQMRK PMTW GLET FVIEO SJ E JIZIV % PIWWSR# % FVSOIR GPSGO GER WXMPP FVIEO ,I GEPPW QI SR XLI XVEMR WTIEO JSV XIR WIGSRHW WXVEMKLX 3O ,I MRXIVVYTXW QI (MH - MRXIVVYTX ]SY# =IW &YX ]SY [IVI WXMPP WTIEOMRK 7S# The word will MW FSXL PEWX XIWXEQIRX ERH JEGYPX] SJ QMRH Not to mention, future of to be 8LI QMVVSV MR 1ERIX E PSRIP] [SQER PIERMRK EKEMRWX E FEV E KPEWW FSXXPI VIÂIGXIH MR XLI KPEWW 8LI WIRWI F] [LMGL [I QEOI WIRWI SJ then, past and future. Here [LMGL MW FSXL [LIVI - EQ ERH [LEX - KMZI ]SY
7
Holding the Tongue, Elizabeth Metzger
Before in front of and earlier, present FSXL here and now. 3V KMJX SJJIVMRK MR XLI [E] SJ wergild, a tradition of giving as peace treaty. To present. To represent. The aim of an EVXMWX ERH EPWS QSXLIVW %JXIV FMVXL Q] QSXLIV GEPPIH LMQ LIV 1MVEGPI GEPPIH QI E +MJX ;LEX HSIW MX XEOI XS FIGSQI ER ERIGHSXI# +ET MR E HMRRIV GSRZIVWEXMSR 2S FVIEH 2S FYXXIVORMJI 8S FVIEO SV ÁPP E QSQIRX SJ XSS QYGL WMPIRGI 7MPIRGI HSIW RSX QIER - GER¸X WTIEO - WMX XYGOIH FILMRH LMW FEGO XV]MRK XS [LMWXPI [LMPI LI TPE]W a game of chess, the same photo, grainy, off-center of me PMWXIRMRK XS LMW FVIEXL XLVSYKL LMW FEGO ,MW SRI LERH LSZIVMRK EFSZI XLI GPSGO XLI SXLIV LERH QEOMRK XLI QSZI A lawyer now. He drinks regularly moderately. He sings in XLI WLS[IV ,I HVMZIW QMRYXIW XS [SVO ,I FIGEQI [LEX - XVMIH XS RIZIV FIGSQI F] XV]MRK XS FI PMOI LI [EW For years when he came home to visit, I would act like a young child, the age I was when he left so he would not miss me. So that he would leave again without wanting to WXE] - FVMRK LMQ GSOIW ERH YRXMI LMW WLSIW ERH WGVEXGL LMW FEGO [LIR LI EWOW XS OIIT XLMRKW XLI WEQI *SV XLI ÁVWX XMQI - Â] EPSRI XS ZMWMX LMQ MR 0I\MRKXSR [LIVI he lives on what was once a famous horse farm. ,S[ EVI ]SY# [LS EVI ]SY
8
The Round
The lips turn in the vowel. ,S[ [EW XLI ÂMKLX# [L] HMH ]SY GSQI %VI ]SY LYRKV]#
9
Holding the Tongue, Elizabeth Metzger
II. ,MW ÁVWX PSZI [EW E KMVP Q] QSXLIV WEMH WLI JIPX WSVV] JSV She had a nervous laugh and too much hair. A name as plain as she was pale. He always loved the underdog. When WLI GEQI SZIV XLI HSSVW FIKER XS GPSWI )EV ER MRGL JVSQ the wall I learned to share. She was as much mine as his, I thought. She danced with me, sang, a voice like sand. I wake up early to have as much of the day without him. ;LIR LI [EOIW YT MX¸W PEXI -X¸W PEXI - WE] - LEZI FIIR waiting all day. 8LIVI MW EP[E]W XLI TSWWMFMPMX] LI [MPP GLSSWI XS WXE] *SV things to disappear you cannot expect them to leave.
children cannot sleep in a city and without a yard MR [LMGL XS XLVS[ E FEPP
1SXLIV LS[ HMH ]SY KIX XLSWI ,I [LEX 1SXLIV XLI PMRIW SR ]SYV FEGO XYVRMRK FEGO ]SY ORS[ FIJSVI ]SY GSYPH WTIEO ]SY GSYPH VIEH E QET ,I LEW RIZIV XSPH QI -¸Q FIEYXMJYP ]SY¸VI PSSOMRK KSSH good to see you, nice dress. Instead, give me your hand, he cracks my wrist. To know while doing so, he can see me.
10
The Round
8LIVI EVI QER] [E]W XS LSPH XLMRKW FEGO % WQMPI E WMPIRGI a knock knock joke.
Behind each person is %R EPTLEFIX ]SY GERRSX VIEH
We have the same color eyes in different shapes. Your eyes are falling out of your head, he says. It hurts my eyes. Mother. He is sensitive to sound, light, a lot of things, she WE]W 1SXLIV WE]W FI TEXMIRX Sometimes I tell her I hate her to show him I am his. 7LI MW FEH EX FVEMHMRK LEMV ,I MW EJVEMH SJ FEPHMRK Turn it around, the photograph frame. It is not the one of him naked of which he is ashamed. It is the other one, HVIWWIH MR E GLVMWXIRMRK HVIWW ,I GSYPH NYWX EW [IPP FI QI
% WGVETFSSO MW E [E] SJ IVEWMRK E QIQSV]
8LI WTIEV FVMHIW SJ XVEKMG LIVSIW Cassandra, Tecmessa. -QEKMRI LEZMRK E REQI [MXL WS QER] W¸W 8LIVI MW WSQIXLMRK PSYH EFSYX [EOMRK F] [LMGL - LEZI EP[E]W QIERX FIMRK E[EOIRIH Wake up wake up 3R XMQI for me means half an hour early. Sometimes when he cannot sleep, I cannot sleep. He plays loud music in which - TMGXYVI LMQ WSFFMRK REOIH [LIR [LEX LI MW VIEPP] HSMRK MW TVSFEFP] RSX
11
Holding the Tongue, Elizabeth Metzger
I have often watched your hand tenderly around a chess piece. Danger and Brother HS RSX VL]QI MR WTIIGL +SSH IRSYKL JSV WMRKMRK - GERRSX WMKLX VIEH 0IEVR F] IEV RS YWI JSV sheet music. 'LSMV 'EVSPMRI KSX XLI WSPS 7LI GSYPH [LMRR] PMOI E LIVH of horses. I envied her. In second grade her father died, fell SYX E [MRHS[ SR 6MZIVWMHI ,M HS ]SY [ERX E TPE]HEXI# ,IV mother is strict, does not wear jeans. He talks to me when I sleep. He tells me to drink soda out of the can. Who would FIPMIZI LIV# -W 3YMNE [MXL YW# *MRKIVW SR XLI TSMRXIV [I XVIQFPI NYWX enough to make it move, not enough to move it. It is hard to name your own spirit. %RSR]QSYW XLI REQI SJ E FIEVHIH TLMPSWSTLIV %RSR]QSYW XLI XSQF SJ XLI YRORS[R WSPHMIV % PSRK REQI MX WIIQW XS IRKVEZI SR IEGL SRI XLEX LEW FIIR JSVKSXXIR % TSVXVEMX SJ WSQISRI IPWI¸W JEXLIV XMPXIH KVMR STIR GSPPEV something moving in the throat, hands the size of clocks. Learning to Swim, a lesson. He pulls us into the ocean.
12
The Round
If you could only save one of us who would ]SY WEZI# 'SQI SR 7[IIXMI -R ER IQIVKIRG]#
3PMZI XSRI FEVMXSRI 1V (SRSZER PIEZIW E RSXI JSV QI SR LMW S[R WXEXMSREV] Meet me in the cafeteria at recess. You have a lot to offer. I hope you know that. ,I GER ]SY LIPT QI YRHIVWXERH [LEX LETTIRW XS 1EVKEVIX MR GLETXIV WIZIRXIIR#
LSX FPYWL ]SY QIER¬
LERH SR Q] WLSYPHIV HS ]SY ORS[ [LEX MX QIERW XS GSQI SJ EKI#
1] QSXLIV HMHR¸X LEZI E JEXLIV 1] JEXLIV HMHR¸X LEZI E QSXLIV 1] FVSXLIV GEPPW QI E WSVI PSWIV 1] QSXLIV WE]W FI E KSSH WTSVX ,EZI ]SY IZIV FIIR EX E PSWW JSV [SVHW#
In a thrift store with my mother. She is trying on coats. Fur, - XLMRO 8LMW MW XLI GPSWIWX - [MPP IZIV FI XS FIMRK FSVR
13
Holding the Tongue, Elizabeth Metzger
+VERHJEXLIV GPSGO QSXLIV XSRKYI FVSXLIVP] PSZI 8LI ÁVWX FS] - OMWWIH - EWOIH LMQ XS OMWW QI ;MXLSYX ORS[MRK [LEX GSQIW EJXIV SV [LEX GEQI FIJSVI SRI GERRSX WE] [LIXLIV it is or not love, a ritual at the door. 1] JEXLIV XEOIW XIR QMRYXIW XS XEOI E TMGXYVI ,I MW EP[E]W ÁHHPMRK [MXL XLI PIRW
)ZIV] WIGSRH ER EFWIRX TEVX SJ WTIIGL
;LIVI MW ]SYV JEXLIV# home - QIER [LIVI MW LI MR XLI TMGXYVIW# 'ER SRI FI TEVX SJ ER MQEKI SRI MW RSX MR# &ILMRH XLI GEQIVE SV FIJSVI YW -R SXLIV [SVHW EVI ]SY FPEQIPIWW MJ ]SY QEOI XLI JVEQI# -R IZIV] TLSXS XLI FEGOKVSYRH MW MR perfect focus, the composition symmetrical, the light just VMKLX -R IZIV] TLSXS WSQISRI LEW WXSTTIH WQMPMRK 1] mother says in framing he forgets the face. We enter rooms as shadows. We tell her when we are thirsty. She is always pouring a glass into a glass. (S ]SY PSZI LMQ#
14
The Round
8VYI SV JEPWI 1. A question is a form of suspension. You ask when you know the answer.
)ZIV]XLMRK XLEX LEW E GSPSV LEW FIIR touched.
.YWX FIJSVI ]SY JEPP EWPIIT ]SY JIIP PMOI ]SY¸VI JEPPMRK
%R EW]QTXSXI MW E PMRI ]SY ETTVSEGL FYX RIZIV VIEGL Therefore equations do not yield answers. *VEY ,ER EVX XIEGLIV ERH TVMRGMTEP EX Q] FVSXLIV¸W WGLSSP WIZIR WGLSSPW MR WIZIR ]IEVW 3RP] XLI RI[ WGLSSPW [MPP XEOI him now. Saturday mornings, the phone rings twice. Hold SR SRI WIGSRH 1] QSXLIV XEOIW XLI VIGIMZIV )YV]XLQ] MW E mandatory part of our curriculum.
0IEVRMRK XS VIEH XLI FSH] FSH] PERKYEKI FVIEXL
1SXLIV SZIV ERH SZIV YRHIV LIV FVIEXL HS XLI] LEZI E word for anguish %KEMR XLI TLSRI LI TPEKMEVM^IH E TEMRXMRK
15
Holding the Tongue, Elizabeth Metzger
It is hanging in my room. I have never lived in a house with a fence, attic, eaves. )EZIWHVSTTMRK XS PMWXIR [MXLSYX FIMRK WIIR
*VEY 2SXMGI XLI ÂS[IVW SR XLI JEV PIJX 8SS TVIGMWI XS FI TEMRXIH F] E PIJX LERH FIEX FYX UYMXI PSZIP]
1SXLIV =IW
*VEY (S ]SY YRHIVWXERH#
1SXLIV 3L ]IW
=SY EVI FIKMRRMRK XS XLMRO - EQ innocent. Even the word is E WIVTIRX - HMH RSX TEMRX XLI ÂS[IVW =SY WLSYPH ORS[ [I EVI FSXL PIJX LERHIH Sometimes even my mother cannot tell our handwriting apart. His is a haunted house, every letter capitalized and YRLMRKIH 1MRI MW LEVHIV XS VIEH XLI PIXXIVW EVI YRIZIR FYX ÂYMH 7SQIXLMRK LSPHMRK XLIQ XSKIXLIV 8IVVSV E QSQIRX [LIR ]SY GERRSX FIGSQI ]SYVWIPJ (S RSX XS YWI XLI [SVH kill /MPP MW E FEH [SVH MR SYV LSYWI ;LIR - GEPP - WE] LI LEW XLVIEXIRIH XS OMPP XLIQ FYX -
16
The Round
am the one she cannot forgive.
It is hard to imagine the one who FIEVW E GLMPH QMKLX FIEV WSQIXLMRK IPWI long after and empty, heavier to hold
;L] HS ]SY LEZI XS XEOI IZIV]XLMRK WS PMXIVEPP]# 7LI LEW marks on her wrist from where he twisted. Not everything GSQIW EX JEGI ZEPYI ]SY [ERX XS WIRH LMQ XS NEMP LI¸W EPQSWX - LSTI ]SY HMI - GV] SR XLI ÂSSV %P[E]W SR XLI ÂSSV FIGEYWI XLI ÂSSV FIEXW FEGO -¸Q EPQSWX
8MQIW 7UYEVI 1MHRMKLX We walk faster than the cars.
,I MW PSSOMRK XS FY] TIVJYQI JSV XLI KMVP [MXL XSS QYGL LEMV 8LIVI MW E VSYRH FSXXPI ERH E WPIRHIV SRI ,I ;LMGL WLSYPH - KIX# 1I - HSR¸X ORS[ ,I 8V] XLMW SR ,I WQIPPW Q] [VMWX
,EZI ]SY IZIV PMWXIRIH XS ER IQTX] LSYWI#
,I LEW E FIXXIV WIRWI SJ HMVIGXMSR ERH XMQI ,I GER XEOI XLI QIEWYVI SJ ER]XLMRK - EQ FIXXIV MR XLI SXLIV WIRWI SJ holding what is measureless
17
Holding the Tongue, Elizabeth Metzger
a secret is a pocket
his hand is in it.
If he takes after my father in one way, it is the way he saves. ,I MW EP[E]W WEZMRK YT JSV WSQIXLMRK LI RIZIV FY]W &YX YRPMOI Q] JEXLIV LI MW GEYXMSYW RSX XS FI YRKIRIVSYW %W MR LI MW E KSSH WEZIV FYX LI MW EPWS E KSSH XMTTIV ,I MW GEVIJYP when choosing neckties. In the car on the parkway, hot night summer, I wish school [SYPH FIKMR WS - GSYPH FI E WGLSSPKMVP EKEMR 'LIGOIVIH XYRMG FSFF] TMRW TYJJ] WPIIZIW 7EJIX] MR RYQFIVW
someone else forgets.
)ZIV] [MWL MW F] REXYVI E JEMPYVI Every memory,
The light like a cut in the mouth FPIIHW SYX XLI KYQ XEOMRK MR JSV XLI ÁVWX XMQI MXW S[R XEWXI
- WXIT EVSYRH ERH EVSYRH MRZMWMFPI XIIXL waiting for you to swallow
18
The Round
An accent is a manner of pronunciation peculiar to a TEVXMGYPEV MRHMZMHYEP SV PSGEXMSR 'SRWMHIV XLI [E] ]SY pronounce way. Is the sound more like the diphthong ai as in pain or tighter like the pure i MR [L]# %R EGGIRX may identify the locality in which its speaker resides, the socio-economic status of his household, the ethnicity of his JEXLIV LS[ SJXIR LI LIEVH E ZSMGI VEMWIH LMW ÁVWX PERKYEKI or some other insecurity. Accents typically differ in quality of voice, pronunciation of vowels and consonants, stress. Then there is the question of diction. Some things he now says differently, which make him seem different and so, no PIWW JEQMPMEV 3L ]IEL# =¸EPP - WII 0E[
+IRYÂIGXIH LI [EMXW JSV XLI [EJIV EW MJ LI [IVI VEMWIH XLEX [E] SV [EMXMRK XS FI VEMWIH On the tip of QIERW SR IHKI FYX EPWS EFSYX XS JEPP =SY QYWX XEOI E VMWO ]IW E VMWO MW [LEX¸W QMWWMRK 8LIVI MW XSS QYGL I in this, not enough is. Think, top of a mountain, dead end of hair, a sharp pencil, the tip of the tongue.
if I say now MX [MPP FI FEGO FIJSVI MX¸W KSRI
% HVIEQ EFVYTXP] IRHIH QMVVSVW WS QER] QMVVSVW WS QER] SJ QI 8LMW MW MRÁRMX] WLI WE]W - WII ]SY FILMRH QI % nightmare. )ZIV]XLMRK LEW FVSOIR EX PIEWX SRGI MR XLMW OMXGLIR
19
Holding the Tongue, Elizabeth Metzger
How am I to mend your hands [MXLSYX LERHW#
2S[ XLEX LI¸W KSRI - WPIIT MR LMW FIH XS FI WYVI LI MW RSX MR it. It is too easy to say we cannot say
XLIVI MW WSQIXLMRK FIX[IIR SYV PMTW
20
Translation of Antonello Borra
&PSWWSQ /MVWGLIRFEYQ Il Corvo (SQERM r YR EPXVS KMSVRS domani si vedrà… HSQERM r RIP HSQERM I P¸SKKM RSR G¸r TM RSR XSVRIVk QEM TM QEM TM QEM TM QEM TM 1E WI E ZSM PE QME ZSGI suona di malaugurio, sappiate che, al contrario, canto un inno alla vita che si veste di nero e si ammanta di futuro.
22
The Round
The Raven 8SQSVVS[¸W ERSXLIV HE] XSQSVVS[ EPP VIQEMRW XS FI WIIR XSQSVVS[¸W RSX XMPP XSQSVVS[ ERH XSHE]¸W RS[ RS QSVI it returns nevermore nevermore, nevermore, nevermore. But if to you my voice portends ominous tidings, know that, just to the contrary, I sing a hymn to life XLEX KSIW GPSXLIH MR FPEGO ERH enwrapped in the future.
23
Sundog, Maggie Tobin Oil on Vellum, 16” x 20”
Reflection, Maggie Tobin Oil on Vellum, 16” x 20”
Fog, Maggie Tobin Oil on Vellum Over Mirror, 36” x 35”
26
confrontation with the landscape
6EGLIP )GSRSQ] X[S GMXMIW JEPP MR PSZI XLVSYKL XLI FSH] SJ E [SQER [LS XVEZIPW MR FIX[IIR X[S GMXMIW JEPP MR PSZI ERH ÁKLX GSRWXERXP] MR XLI PERKYEKI of airplanes arguments that smell of stale air and peanuts XLI FMKKIWX EMVTSVX XLMW WMHI SJ XLI %XPERXMG security lines do not feel like safety XLI] JIIP PMOI MQEKMREXMSR XLI ZMWMSR SJ E FSH] MR XLI EMV going down WSQI[LIVI EPSRK XLI IEWX GSEWX MR E PSZIV¸W ÁREP WTEX SJ E FMOIV LMX FVSEHWMHI SR ER -S[E LMKL[E] WSQI[LIVI FIX[IIR YVFER SGIERW SJ FIEVW ETTVSEGLMRK XLI [SSHW´XMR] XIRX EKEMRWX XLI river rush SJ IEGL TEVXMRK¸W TSXIRXMEP JSV ÁREPMX] XLI X[S GMXMIW WPMRK QYH MRXS IEGL SXLIV¸W XMVIH JEV JEGIW WE]MRK I love you baby but when you’re far I only remember the good stuff now you’ve come back and I can’t stand the way you trim your roadsides SV I can’t stomach another roil of your summer day’s hot water air SV TPIEWI WXST FMXMRK ]SYV REMPW [MXL XLSWI MGI XIIXL [MRXIVW
27
Confrontation, Rachel Economy
ERH I never asked you to love me ERH Why should I change for you? two cities pull at the arms of a woman who travels in FIX[IIR LIV VMFW RIZIV [ERXIH XS WTPMX WS QYGL MR PSWX PERH PS]EPX] FYX in the north, under the smell of hand-me-down quilt that whispers sweet voices, dead it once knew walking, and touched FVIEXLMRK XLI [SQER [IITW XS [EOMRK throat thirsty thirsty oh thirsty for the way honeyed kudzu vine and hot poison ivy swallow the sidewalk JSV XLI [E] XLI KVIIR ÁKLXW FEGO for ninety degrees singing cicada songs in the magnolia two cities fall in love only one knows what winter truly means MR .YP] XLI SXLIV VIQIQFIVW LS[ PERH ERH GSRGVIXI ZMI for position XLIVI MW WSQIXLMRK XS FI WEMH JSV E LIEVX warm enough to open, to love disorder if it smells like a plant XLI FSH] GSRJVSRXIH [MXL E KVIIR VMQQIH WO] understands its own smallness YRHIVWXERHW XLI WYR WQIPP W[IEX SJ FIMRK [LSPI
28
Training Wheels
1MGLEIP +SSHQER 3JXIR MR MRXIVZMI[W ERH MR NYROIXW -¸ZI FIIR PSEXL XS HMWGYWW my “process,” as I feel as though it diminishes the certain romance Q] GVEJX GEVVMIW %JXIV EPP Q] IQFSHMQIRXW SR WXEKI ERH WGVIIR WYFWYQI ZEVMSYW XIGLRMUYIW -¸ZI EGGVYIH ZMW k ZMW XLI 7XVEWFIVK WGLSSP QEMRP] ERH MJ ]SY GEVI XS HS E FEGOKVSYRH GLIGO [LMGL ]SY [IPP WLSYPH MJ ]SY JERG] yourself a researcher and a consummate professional), ]SY¸PP UYMXI GPIEVP] WII XLEX MX¸W SJXIR GMXIH´ERH EGGYVEXIP] WS´EW Q] QEMR WTLIVI SJ MRÂYIRGI 7YVI -¸ZI HEFFPIH MR WSQI (IP 'PSWI QIXLSHW WSQI MQTVSZMWEXMSR GSQIHMG EWWSGMEXMZI FYX QEMRP] -¸ZI WXYHMIH 7XVEWFIVK 8LEX¸W XLI I\XIRX SJ MX 7XVEWFIVK¸W Q] QER -X¸W EPP XLIVI MR TVMRX - FIPMIZI MR 1IXLSH´EPP XLI SJJEP SJ WSGMIX] EPP SJ XLI ZMERHW of acting, all one needs to truly synthesize is contained [MXLMR SFWIVZEXMSR JVSQ E WTIGXEXSVMEP VIKMWXIV -X MW XLI WTIGXEXSVMEP VIKMWXIV XLEX EPPS[W SRI XS I\TPSVI XLI FIMRK RIWW SJ XLI WYFNIGX - ÁRH QER] TEVEPPIPW FIX[IIR XLI 7XVEWFIVK QIXLSH ERH ,IMHIKKIV¸W GSRGITX SJ µH[IPPMRK ¶ [LIVI TSIXMGEPP] QER H[IPPW MR XLI´SL [IPP PSSO EX QI HMWGYWWMRK Q] µTVSGIWW ¶ Culling The Drums opens Wednesday in select theaters; I [IRX XS XLI TVIQMIVI XLMW TEWX [IIOIRH - LSRIWXP] HSR¸X ORS[ LS[ MX¸PP FI VIGIMZIH 8LIVI EVI WIUYIRGIW MR [LMGL -¸Q [IPP [SSHIR UYMXI JVEROP] =IW µ[SSHIR¶ [SYPH FI XLI [SVH -¸H YWI XS HIWGVMFI Q] ZEVMSYW GSYRXIRERGIW Q] WXSPIR QSQIRXW Q] JYVXMZI WXEVIW´[IPP µ[SSHIR¶ ERH
29
Training Wheels, Michael Goodman
µJYVXMZI ¶ SV µ[SSHIRP] JYVXMZI¶´WYVI µ[SSHIRP] JYVXMZI ¶ 1] GLEVEGXIV 4IVVMR &PERGLIJSVX [IPP - HSR¸X ORS[ MJ LI WLSYPH LEZI FIIR E µ[SSHIRP] JYVXMZI¶ GLEVEGXIV FYX - felt that the training I had done had a rather clandestine SVREQIRX EFSYX MX 4IVVMR MW E NSYVREPMWX ERH - LEHR¸X LEH E PMGO SJ NSYVREPMWXMG MRWXMRGX FIJSVI WMKRMRK SR YRPIWW you consider the paid internship I had with Newsweek for a quarter in the early nineties, a move I made to study journalists and how they journalize just so, like they do, WS EHSVEFP] ]SY ORS[# )ZIR XLIR XLSYKL - [EW QIVIP] watching them, waiting in the weeds, examining the examiners, if you will. I knew that unless I truly investigated [LEX MX [EW XS FI ER MRZIWXMKEXSV XLIR 4IVVMR &PERGLIJSVX QMKLX EW [IPP FI E HSSV XS HSSV ZEGYYQ WEPIWQER MR XLI ÁPQ JSV LI [SYPH WYVIP] FI ER]XLMRK FYX E NSYVREPMWX 3RI of the producers suggested that I seek out some reportorial XVEMRMRK XLEX - JSPPS[ E FIEX ERH KIX MX ZIXXIH F] E QENSV TYFPMGEXMSR MR E QSGO TVSGIWW SJ GSYVWI [IPP YRPIWW XLI story I produced was that good ´REXYVEPP] - XLSYKLX XLI idea was crackerjack. 8S Q] KVIEX JSVXYRI E QENSV IEVXLUYEOI LEH NYWX LMX 1EPHMZIW ERH XS EHH WEPX XS XLI [SYRHW SJ XLI ÁRI 1EPHMZMER TISTPI
[LSQ -¸H KS SR XS [EVQP] QSRMOIV Q] µ1EP HMZEW¶ ER YRTVIGIHIRXIH FSYX SJ X]TLYW LEH W[ITX XLVSYKL XLI TSSV island nation. While this might sound ghoulish (and I mean RSX XS WSYRH KLSYPMWL -¸Q NYWX FIMRK GERHMH XLI WM^I SJ 1EPHMZIW [EW GSQTEGX IRSYKL XS RSX TVSZI XSS QYGL SJ E challenge for me and my sponsor to traverse, a disaster with µXVEMRMRK [LIIPW ¶ MJ - QE] FI WS FSPH´MX [EW ER EYWTMGMSYW PEYRGLMRK TSMRX JSV Q] VIFMVXL EW 4IVVMR &PERGLIJSVX 3J GSYVWI - HSR¸X QIER XS EX EPP WYKKIWX XLEX -¸Q glad 1EPHMZIW [EW VEZEKIH F] XLI LERH SJ +EIE - WIVMSYWP] LEXI LIV
30
The Round
LIVWIPJ´XLEX [SYPH FI NYWX mephitic´FYX - HS FIPMIZI XLEX if any good could come of such a sheer tragedy, it might TSWWMFP] FI MR XLI JSVQ SJ E WYTIVPEXMZI TIVJSVQERGI SV some great redemptive art, or something, anything, who ORS[W# 1E]FI MR Q] MRZIWXMKEXMZI FVIEHXL - GSYPH QYWXIV up enough snuff to write my own spec script for an elegiac SHI XS 1EPHMZIW´WSQIXLMRK EPSRK XLI PMRIW SJ Hiroshima, Mon Amour FYX [MXLSYX EPP SJ XLI VEHMEXMSR FYVRW 8LSWI were just upsetting. %RH WS - WIGYVIH E FIEX [MXL Esquire to cover the unfurling XVEKIH] ERH HMWIQFEVOIH SR E NSYVRI] XS XLI SRGI KPSVMSYW ERH ERGIWXVEP LSQI 1EPHMZIW %L ]SYV FIEYX] =SYV PSTMRK KVSZIW =SYV HIIT HIPPW =SYV HIGIRX MRJVEWXVYGXYVI *VSQ XLI LIPMTEH XLI IRXMVI ÂEXPERH PSSOIH WMQTP] KSVKISYW %R ayah-looking woman came to our door and offered me a WTVMRK VSPP FVMQQMRK [MXL JVIWL WGVI[TMRI GSQTPMQIRXW of the chef. Fan-tastic WTVMRK VSPP -¸ZI RIZIV LEH WGVI[TMRI FIJSVI %TTEVIRXP] MX¸W E TMPPEV SJ 1EPHMZMER GYMWMRI 7SVX SJ E TVIPETWEVMER TMRIETTPI XLMRK -X XYVRW SYX EW Q] 46 QER MRJSVQIH QI XLEX 1EPHMZIW¸ PIEHMRK MRHYWXV] MW XSYVMWQ 8LIVIJSVI XLMW [LSPI XIQFPSV TYX E HEQTIV SR XLEX [LSPI operation, which is a real shame. Apparently a great deal SJ XLI VIWSVXW [IVI PIZIPIH MR XLI GEIWYVEI´XLIQIH SRIW IRHIQMG SRIW XLI [LSPI KEQYX % VIEP WLEQI XS FI WYVI 0YGOMP] E JI[ SJ XLI QSWX VITYXIH IWXEFPMWLQIRXW QEREKIH XS VIQEMR MRXEGX VIPEXMZIP] YRWGEXLIH - LEH FIIR FSSOIH MR SRI SJ XLIWI´&PYI 0IEJ 0Y\YV] GSRHSQMRMYQW HMWXMRGXMZI VIRXEPW´- LEH LIEVH XLEX XLI MRXIVMSV HIGSVEXSV tested expatriate focus groups for their favorite furnishings and corresponding color schemes to achieve maximum authenticity. This was professional-grade décor.
31
Training Wheels, Michael Goodman
,S[IZIV - ORI[ XLEX MX [SYPH FI WPMKLXP] FVE^IR SJ QI XS FI all smiles in a place of great discord, so I told my cicerone, Shujau, to take me to the “saddest part of the island” to XIQTIV Q] FYS]ERG] %RH WS LI HMH %RH KII [EW MX WEH ,SYWIW VE^IH *PEXXIRIH % VIEP FY^^OMPP .YWX [LEX - RIIHIH XS KIX MRXS XLI µ^SRI ¶ 3V VEXLIV XLI µ^SRI¶ -¸H MQEKMRI 4IVVMR [SYPH ÁRH LMQWIPJ MR [LIR LMW W]QTEXLIXMG RIVZSYW W]WXIQ KSIW LE][MVI XLEX IPIKERX QM\ SJ WOITXMGMWQ FVMS ERH HS - HIXIGX E LMRX SJ FYPPMWLRIWW# ;L] ]IW - HS HIXIGX MX 4IVVMR MW E FMX FYPPMWL F] REXYVI´VEMWIH SR XLI [VSRK WMHI SJ XLI XVEGOW [LMGL MW RS WQEPP JIEX GSRWMHIVMRK LMW YTFVMRKMRK MR ER EKVIIEFPI 8YHSV LSQI MR ;MPXSR 'SRRIGXMGYX 8LMW was not in the treatment for Culling the Drums FYX XLI producers told me to “go nuts” with my characterization, so - LIPH XLIQ XS XLIMV [SVH &YX XLI 1EPHMZMER WXVIIXW [IVI MR YXXIV HMWWSPYXMSR TPEROW ERH XMRHIV EWYRHIV GSFFPIWXSRIW LYWOIH MR GLYROW SJ EVKMPPEGISYW LYPPEFEPSS FEFMIW FE[PMRK JSVQIVP] TVMWXMRI JEGEHIW HIWTSMPIH SJ XLIMV GEFSGLSR EHSVRQIRX´ETTEVIRXP] PSGEP VSZMRK KERKW XSSO EHZERXEKI SJ XLI STTSVXYRMX] SJ KVIEX XYQYPX´MX [EW ER YRQMXMKEXIH QIWW 8S QEOI QEXXIVW [SVWI XLIVI [EW WMKRMÁGERX ÂSSHMRK MR 1EPq´XLI [SSHIR STIR[SVO SJ QER] WLEGOW [IVI VSXXIH ERH KYXXIH 8S XIPP XLI XVYXL MX VIWIQFPIH XLI QMWI IR WGrRI SJ Q] FVIEOSYX ÁPQ A Burden on Happy Shoulders an awful PSX [LEX [MXL XLI VEZEKIH (IZIPSTMRK 2EXMSR PSGEPI ERH the unfortunate odor of moldering sawdust and what have ]SY %PWS PSXW SJ WLMVXPIWWRIWW [LMGL - HSR¸X FIPMIZI MW E HMWXMRGXP] 1EPHMZMER TLIRSQIRSR´MX TVSFEFP] LEH QSVI to do with the disaster and all. Speaking of which, I was XSPH XS [IEV XLMW RIEX PMXXPI KMQGVEGO WOMVX OMPX GSQTSWMXI GEPPIH E FYRHY - LEH XLI QIERIWX FYRHY SR XLI FPSGO ]SY GER FI WYVI SJ XLEX
32
The Round
I tried to communicate with the locals to ÂI\ Q] VITSVXSVMEP muscles FYX - TVSQTXP] I\TIVMIRGIH Q] ÁVWX LYVHPI MR XLMW EWWMKRQIRX´REQIP] XLI 1EPHMZMER TISTPI WIIQ XS FI E very humorless people. I mean, relief aid should include GSQMG VIPMIJ RS# - IRKEKIH MR WSQI VITEVXII [MXL XLI PSGEP ÂEZSV ERH 7LYNEY SJJIVIH XS XVERWPEXI %X ÁVWX MX [EW KIXXMRK EPSRK VEXLIV ÁRI - [EW HSMRK WSQI GSMR XVMGOW EQYWMRK the cute little wee bairns FIQYWMRK FYX MQTVIWWMRK XLI adults with my legerdemain. Then I chose to tell jokes. 3RI SJ XLI QIR XSPH QI SJ LMW TPMKLX SJ LS[ LMW LSQI [EW WTPMX HS[R XLI QMHHPI PMOI E VSSX FYPF SR E FYXGLIV FSEVH LS[ LMW OMHW [IVI QMWWMRK JSV E JI[ RMKLXW PEXIV XS FI JSYRH E QMPI SV WS E[E] XLSYKL - EHH WEJI ERH WSYRH and their current living in a tent city. To lighten the mood ERH PIEZIR XLI PSEH - EHHIH µ-X [EWR¸X my JEYPX ¶ 8LI QER looked confused and offended. You see, I was punning on XLI HSYFPI IRXIRHVI SJ fault EW MR µ-X¸W RSX Q] JEYPX PMRI - HSR¸X LEZI S[RIVWLMT SJ XLI UYEOI ¶ - EWOIH 7LYNEY MJ LI GSYPH TSWWMFP] XVERWPEXI XLI TYR QIPPMÂYSYWP] MRXS XLI QER¸W REXMZI XSRKYI WS EW RSX XS GSVVYTX XLI MRXIKVMX] SJ XLI SVMKMREP IUYMZSUYI FYX LI XSPH QI XLEX MX HMH RSX TVSTIVP] XVERWPEXI MRXS XLI (LMZILM PERKYEKI - XLIR XSPH E VEXLIV VMWUYq FMX EFSYX 'PEYHMRI 0SRKIX¸W MRJEQSYW VIPEXMSRWLMT [MXL &SFF] /IRRIH] 8LI] PEYKLIH LIEVXMP] 7LYNEY PEXIV told me that he told his own joke instead of translating QMRI µJSV Q] FIRIÁX ¶ - EWOIH LMQ XS VITIEX MX XS QI ,I WEMH µ=SY [SYPHR¸X YRHIVWXERH ¶ ;IPP SJ GSYVWI - HMHR¸X YRHIVWXERH LI HIPMZIVIH MX MR (LMZILM 7SQI PERKYEKI LYL# ,YQSVPIWW %L XLI GSRXMRKIRGMIW - [EW LS[IZIV VIPMIZIH XS ÁRH XLEX - [SYPH LEZI RS TVSFPIQ VIGIMZMRK RSRTEVXMWER TYVIP] SFNIGXMZI MRZIWXMKEXMZI VITSVXW as my star image had not quite carried over from America to
33
Training Wheels, Michael Goodman
1EPHMZIW EW - LEH TVIZMSYWP] TVIWYQIH 8LI TISTPI HMHR¸X WIIQ VIGSKRM^I QI EW &PEMRI 8SHH ,EQQSRH IWXIIQIH ÁPQ star (and if they did, then they are the most well-mannered -¸ZI IRGSYRXIVIH E RSFPI XVEMX JSV [LMGL - GSQQIRH XLIQ FYX EW E FIRIZSPIRX NSYVREPMWX E PMEMWSR XS XLI 3GGMHIRX 8LMW QEHI XLI XVERWMXMSR XS 4IVVMR &PERGLIJSVX JEV IEWMIV XLER - ERXMGMTEXIH - IZIR WXEVXIH TVSFMRK XLI PSGEPW JSV MRJSVQEXMSR YRHIV XLI TWIYHSR]Q 4IVVMR XS µKIX E JIIP¶ JSV LS[ LI [SYPH XEPO XVSX YWI LMW I]IFVS[W IQSXI IXG - IZIR FIKER XS HIZIPST WSQI MRWMKLXW MRXS 4IVVMR¸W *EMVÁIPH 'SYRX] EHSPIWGIRGI´- GVIEXIH E W[EVXL] GLMPHLSSH GLYQ SJ LMW 7O]I ERH LMW JEZSVMXI TM^^IVME µ7PMGIW ¶ 3J GSYVWI all of this information was strictly non-canonical to the Culling the Drums PSVI FYX MX LIPTIH QI MRXIVGSQQYRMGEXI with the character. For a moment, I was resolute in having 4IVVMR WPMKLXP] PMWT SR LMW YTW[MRKW FYX [LIR E 1EPq PSGEP EWOIH QI MJ - GSYPH LIPT ÁRH LMW QMWWMRK LIMVPSSQW MR WSQI JEPHIVEP MX NYWX HMHR¸X JIIP authentic for the character to VIWTSRH [MXL E PMWT -X¸W EPWS LEVH XS TVSRSYRGI XLI [SVHW µWSVV] - GER¸X¶ [MXL E PMWT - HMHR¸X [ERX XLI TSSV HIVIPMGX to feel insulted, after all, and then go and tell his friends EX WYTTIV SV FVYRGL SZIV WSQI WGVI[TMRI ERH XIE XLEX - WPMKLXIH LMQ XLEX [SYPH NYWX FI ER YRJSVXYREXI WREVP 7S - dropped the impediment. Another revelatory moment unveiled itself when I saw a PMXXPI RYVWPMRK MR XLI QSWX HIWYPXSV] VEKW -¸H WIIR MR E XMQI ,I QMKLX LEZI LEH E GPIJX TEPEXI SV LI QMKLX¸ZI RSX -X [EW E TSSVP] PMX EVIE WS - GSYPHR¸X UYMXI XIPP´MX GSYPH LEZI FIIR E FE] PIEJ SV WSQIXLMRK XLEX XLI GLMPH EJÁ\IH XS LMW PMT SYX SJ [LMQW] ]SY ORS[ GLMPHVIR [MXL XLMRKW SJ XLEX WSVX ´ FYX - JIPX EW XLSYKL MX [EW E FVMPPMERX STTSVXYRMX] JSV 4IVVMR XS WLMRI - VIQSZIH JVSQ Q] XSXI E WTEVI HMQMRYXMZI FEV
34
The Round
of soap, one of the amenities from Blue Leaf, and offered MX XS XLI FS] - JIPX EW XLSYKL 4IVVMR [EW RSX MRHMWTSWIH XS MQTVSQTXY EGXW SJ GLEVMX] ERH - JIPX XLEX XLMW [SYPH FI E GLSMGI 4IVVMR &PERGLIJSVX [SYPH LEZI QEHI EJJSVHIH XLI GLERGI 4PYW 4IVVMR¸W E VIWSYVGIJYP JIPPS[ XLYW LI¸H YWI ER] MXIQ MR LMW MRZIRXSV] XS QIIX SFNIGXMZIW ERH [LEXRSX 3J GSYVWI 4IVVMR [SYPH RSX LEZI EGGIWW XS ER] GSQTPMQIRXEV] &PYI 0IEJ FSH] WSET EW 4IVVMR [SYPH RSX FI WMXYEXIH MR 1EPHMZIW MR XLI ÁVWX TPEGI FYX XLMW [EW E QMRSV TPSX MRGSRKVYMX] ERH - HMHR¸X JIIP PMOI FIMRK E JYWWFYHKIX EFSYX MX WS - EPPS[IH Q]WIPJ XS KMZI 4IVVMR XLMW KMJX SJ E KIRIVSYW HIIH 4PYW XLI HIPYKI IRWYVIH XLEX XLMW FS] [SYPH LEZI WYRHV] FEXLMRK STTSVXYRMXMIW´LI GSYPH NYWX PEXLIV YT VMKLX XLIVI MR XLI XLSVSYKLJEVI ERH KIX GVEGOMRK 'SRZIRMIRX JSV LMQ RS HSYFX -X LEH FIIR UYMXI XLI HE] 7LYNEY VIXYVRIH QI XS &PYI 0IEJ [LIVIYTSR - MQQIHMEXIP] VIXMVIH XS Q] WYMXI 1] mattress was slightly knobby FYX - JIPX EW XLSYKL - WLSYPHR¸X complain. I did register a note to myself, however, that if - [IVI XS VIZMWMX 1EPq EX E PIWW JVIRIXMG XMQI XLEX - [SYPH consider other resorts to frequent, or at the very least, I would complain to the Blue Leaf staff. After all, quake or RSX E ORSFF] QEXXVIWW MW E ORSFF] QEXXVIWW ERH XLEX¸W NYWX YRFIGSQMRK SJ E PSHKMRK -X [EW EVSYRH XLMW XMQI XLEX - FIKER XS JIIP E WLEOI E [MGOIH WLEOI´[LEX - PEXIV PIEVRIH [EW ER EJXIVWLSGO´ERH - [SR¸X ÁF MX [EW EFWSPYXIP] XIVVMJ]MRK :EVMSYW VIKMSREP FEKEXIPPIW JIPP JVSQ XLI [EPPW the mirror almost WLEXXIVIH FYX HMHR¸X QIVGMJYPP]´[LEX E QIWW XLEX [SYPH¸ZI QEHI XLI GSRWXMXYXMSR SJ XLI FYMPHMRK felt compromised for a good forty seconds, and I could not KIX Q] FIEVMRKW - OITX PS[ EW Q] ERH QSWX PMOIP] 4IVVMR¸W instincts provided, and curled up into a fetal position for
35
Training Wheels, Michael Goodman
STXMQEP HIRWMX] MJ - VIQIQFIV Q] TVSZMWMSREP TL]WMGW GSVVIGXP] YRXMP XLI WIMWQ WYFWMHIH - [EW E FMX WXEKKIVIH JVSQ XLI [LSPI SVHIEP FYX EJXIV - [EW WERKYMRI JVSQ XLI TVSWTIGXW SJ Q] VIKMWXVEXMSR SJ XLI I\TIVMIRGI )EGL XVEYQE MW E RI[ NYRGXYVI JSV ER EHHMXMSR XS XLI 1IXLSH compendium. I could feel my range expanding. Still, after that, I needed a drink, and a tall one. I went downstairs to the Blue Leaf concourse, where they had a UYEMRX PMXXPI FEV PSYRKI [MXL ZEVMSYW 1EPHMZMER JVMTTIV] ERH KI[KE[W E FYPFYP TPE]IV [LSWI QYWMG - [EWR¸X XLI JSRHIWX SJ FYX - GSRWGMSYWP] QEHI 4IVVMR JSRH SJ ]SY ORS[ JSV TIVWSREP KVS[XL ERH E JI[ VITSVXIVW WGEXXIVIH EFSYX TIGOMRK EX FVIEHJVYMX ERH [ELSS ERH XS Q] EWXSRMWLQIRX GLIIWIFYVKIVW - YRHIVWXERH XLEX XLIWI VIWSVXW EGGSQQSHEXI %QIVMGERW FYX [LIR MR 1EPHMZIW HS EW XLI 1EPHMZMERW HS (SR¸X WUYERHIV ]SYV STTSVXYRMX] XS XEWXI KEVYHM]E [LMGL EKEMR - [EWR¸X ZIV] JSRH SJ FYX - [SYPHR¸X LEZI GSQI XS that conclusion had I not tried MX SV VMLEEOYVY MJ PIRX XLI JSVXYRI 8LIWI TISTPI [IVI SFZMSYWP] RSX ZIV] 1IXLSH - WYTTVIWWIH Q] ERH 4IVVMR¸W WYVVSKEXI WIRWI SJ TIVWSREP EJJVSRX XLEX - [EW WYVI XLI 1EPHMZMER TISTPI [SYPH LEZI JIPX EX XLMW WMKLX ERH WEX EX XLI FEV - EWOIH XLI FEVXIRHIV XS Á\ QI YT E RMGI WGVI[TMRI HEMUYMVM SV [LEXIZIV XLIWI (LMZILM drink to “take the edge off.” He told me that the country MW TVIHSQMRERXP] 1YWPMQ ERH XLYWP] LEZI RS MRHMKIRSYW EPGSLSPMG FIZIVEKIW - [EW WS HMWETTSMRXIH JSV XLIQ %JXIV XLMW QEWWMZI HIWXVYGXMSR ]SY¸H XLMRO XLI 1EPHMZMERW [SYPH want to commiserate over a sweet pousse-café or even E WXVEMKLX YT 6SF 6S] FYX EL [IPP 6IPMKMSR MW XVYP] XLI opiate of the masses. 7S - SVHIVIH E +YMRRIWW -X [EW E FMX knobby FYX - HIGMHIH
36
The Round
XLEX 4IVVMR PMOIW LMW WXSYXW ORSFF] [MXL ER EQTPI LIEH JSV LMW PMTW XS WYT %W - [EW EPSRI [MXL Q] 1EPHMZMER +YMRRIWW I felt a tap on my shoulder, to which I had a mild spasmodic NIVO FEGO MX [EW E PEH] E PIEHMRK PEH] % [MGOIH SRI EX XLEX µ,I] -¸Q WSVV]¬ - HSR¸X YWYEPP] HS XLMW FYX ]SY¸VI´&PEMRI 8SHH ,EQQSRH EVIR¸X ]SY#¶ 8LMW TVIWIRXIH E GLEPPIRKI - LEH XS YWI EPP SJ XLI XVMGOW MR Q] VITSWMXSV] XS FEPERGI &PEMRI [MXL 4IVVMR [MXLSYX QEVVMRK XLI QEVVS[ SJ IMXLIV of the two. µ=IW =IW %RH ]SY´¶ µ-¸Q 0]HME +PSFE´- [VMXI JSV XLI %WWSGMEXIH 4V´¶ µ(S ]SY [ERX ER MRXIVZMI[ SV WSQIXLMRK#¶ “Well, I was just actually coming to get a drink after that EJXIVWLSGO´&PEMRI 8SHH ,EQQSRH =SY¸VI MR 1EPHMZIW ,YL ;S[ 8LMW MW WYVVIEP (MH - NYWX WE] XLEX SYX PSYH# 2S MX¸W´¶ µ-X¸W ÁRI VIEPP] 2S RIIH XS FI WXEVWXVYGO -¸Q NYWX E JIPPIV ¶ µ;IPP - QIER MX¸W that FYX EPWS GSQMRK HS[R JVSQ Q] VSSQ EJXIV E XVIQSV¬ ]SY ORS[ XLEX¸W RI[ JSV QI -¸Q JVSQ 2I[ =SVO ERH´[IPP - GSQI HS[R XS WIXXPI Q] RIVZIW ERH XLIVI¸W you &PEMRI ]SY ]SY ORS[ µGIPIFVMX] ¶ =SY ORS[ .YWX WYVVIEP 8LI MGMRK SR XLI GEOI -¸Q WSVV] -¸Q RSX VIEPP] QEOMRK QYGL WIRWI VMKLX RS[ - XLMRO -¸Q WXMPP MR E FMX SJ shock from what just happened… You know, see it from my TSMRX SJ ZMI[´¶ - GSRWMHIVIH VIXEMRMRK LIV TSMRX SJ ZMI[ JSV Q] 1IXLSH
37
Training Wheels, Michael Goodman
GSQTIRHMYQ FYX EW - HSR¸X JSVIWII Q]WIPJ IZIV TPE]MRK a female journalist, I saved space for more pertinent empiricism. µ;IPP RS RIIH XS FI MR WLSGO ;I¸VI EPP TISTPI 'ER - KIX ]SY E HVMRO#¶ µ3L 2S[ ]SY¸VI´SOE] TIVJIGX -¸PP¬ -¸PP XEOI E HVMRO =IW A drink, of um, a gin and tonic.” µ&EVXIRHIV =SYV ÁRIWX KMR ERH XSRMG [MXL E WTVMX^ SJ WGVI[TMRI ,EZI ]SY XVMIH XLI WGVI[TMRI 0]HME# -X¸W indigenous.” µ2S RS - LEZIR¸X ]IX 7S¬ EVI ]SY LIVI JSV YL LYQERMXEVMER EMH#¶ µ%GXYEPP] JYRR] ]SY WLSYPH EWO -¸Q HSMRK [LEX ]SY HS -¸Q FIMRK E NSYVREPMWX -X¸W EGXYEPP] JSV E VSPI -¸Q TVITEVMRK ¶ µ3L¬¶ 0]HME WLSX QI E PSSO XLEX [EW IMXLIV HIPMGMSYWP] coquettish or slightly insulted. “Are they making a movie EFSYX XLMW EPVIEH]#¶ µ2S 2S 2SX EX EPP 1E]FI SRI HE] HITIRHMRK SR [LEX -´ FYX RS -X¸W JSV E VSPI SJ E NSYVREPMWX ERH WS - ZSPYRXIIVIH XS HS E TMIGI SR XLMW LSVVMFPI NYWX horrible crisis.” µ%RH¬ XLEX¸W KSMRK XS LIPT ]SYV VSPI#¶ µ;IPP - YWYEPP] HSR¸X PMOI XS HMWGYWW Q] ·TVSGIWW ¸ FYX - YWI XLI 1IXLSH 8LI 7XVEWFIVK QIXLSH XS FI I\EGX ¶
38
The Round
µ-¬ - WII %RH WS ]SYV TMIGI# =SY¸ZI GSZIVIH E PSX EPVIEH]#¶ µ3L ]IW -¸ZI WIIR WMKLXW .YWX XLMW IZIRMRK - FEXLIH E GPIJX TEPEXI FS] VMKLX MR XLI WXVIIX -¸Q RSX KSMRK XS PMI - [EW moved.” µ3L¬ SL 8LEX¸W VIEPP] OMRH SJ ]SY ;S[ ¶ µ3L FYX E XVMÂI ;LS [SYPH - FI MJ - GSYPHR¸X ]SY ORS[ just help XLIWI TSSV JSPOW# 7SQIXMQIW MX¸W LEVH XS NYWX stay E NSYVREPMWX ]SY ORS[ [LEX - QIER# ,S[ GER ]SY VIQEMR E WTIGXEXSV MR XLSWI WMXYEXMSRW# 7SQIXMQIW ]SY NYWX LEZI XS act.” µ=SY¸VI ]SY¸VI XIPPMRK QI =SY¸VI XEPOMRK XS E NSYVREPMWX here.” “Indeed. We journalists have it rough.” 0]HME PEYKLIH EX XLMW - [EWR¸X NSOMRK FYX - FIPMIZI WLI was generally responding to my droll demeanor. I then [SRHIVIH [LEX WLI [SYPH LEZI XLSYKLX EFSYX Q] 'PEYHMRI 0SRKIX &SFF] /IRRIH] NSOI 7LI TVSFEFP] [SYPH LEZI JSYRH MX LMPEVMSYW FYX MX NYWX HMHR¸X JIIP authentic to say it XLIR WS - LIPH Q] XSRKYI ERH UYEJJIH Q] +YMRRIWW ,IV drink arrived. “To journalism,” I propose. “To journalism.” 3YV KPEWWIW EFYXXIH ;I LEZI XSEWXIH ERH RS[ [I KIX XS know each other. I, Blaine. She, Lydia. Ah, the antediluvian
39
Training Wheels, Michael Goodman
PMXYVK] SJ GSYVXWLMT %KI SPH EW 1EPHMZIW [VMXXIR SR E ZIPPYQ SJ TYVI 1IXLSH 2S[ I would never have my way with a ÂIHKPMRK NSYVREPMWX [LS GPIEVP] [EW MR E WXEXI SJ WSQI WSVX SJ HMWGSVH FI MX JVSQ XLI WLSGO SJ LIV WYVVSYRHMRKW SV QI SV [LEXIZIV FI´FYX 4IVVMR SR XLI SXLIV LERH¬ [IPP LI¸W µFYPPMWL ¶ - JIPX EW XLSYKL LI [SYPH GIVXEMRP] NYQT EX XLI GLERGI XS FIH E TVIXX] [SQER JSV - HIGMHIH XLIR XLEX LI [EW E VIGMHMZMWX FIHW[IVZIV ERH XLYW [EW TVSRI XS GIVXEMR MRHIPMGEGMIW WYGL EW XLMW ZIV] WMXYEXMSR - LETTIRIH XS ÁRH Q]WIPJ MR 8LMW PSYGLI EHHVIWW - JIPX [EW RSX SRP] GVIHMXEFPI XS LMW XIQTIVEQIRX FYX MR JEGX integral to it. This would make 4IVVMR LETTIR 4PYW - FIPMIZIH MX [EW WSYRH PSKMG XLEX 4IVVMR &PERGLIJSVX [SYPH RSX SRP] JVEXIVRM^I [MXL JIPPS[ NSYVREPMWXW FYX EPWS IRKEKI MR GPSWI UYEVXIVW MRZIWXMKEXMSR SJ SXLIV NSYVREPMWXW 4IVVMR MW MRUYMWMXMZI F] REXYVI 4PYW XLI EGQI SJ 1IXLSH [SYPH FI XS RSX SRP] KIX MRWMHI XLI QMRH SJ E NSYVREPMWX FYX WS XSS XS KIX MRWMHI XLI body of another journalist. And so I resolved to do that. For the future of art, of course. All in all, I felt at the time that the sojourn was a success. I wrote my piece swiftly and journalistically, amassing all the witness testimonials from notes and sources I garnered, GEVIJYPP] GMXMRK ERH VIQEMRMRK JEMXLJYP XS [LEX 4IVVMR ERH I saw out there in that smelter of an island. Shujau helped me verify certain choice words, of course. That Shujau. ;LEX ER SVMKMREP XLEX QER %RH [LIR - WYFQMXXIH MX XS Esquire - IZIR EWOIH XLIQ XS TYFPMWL MX YRHIV XLI REQI µ4IVVMR &PERGLIJSVX¶ XS JYPP] MQQIVWI Q]WIPJ ,S[IZIV XLI TVSHYGIVW MRXIVZIRIH FIGEYWI Culling The Drums is a TIVMSH TMIGI´4IVVMR [SYPH LEZI FIIR [IPP VIXMVIH F] XLI XMQI XLI [LSPI 1EPHMZIW XVEKIH] SGGYVVIH MR XLI LMWXSVMGEP HMIKIWMW´XLI] HMH RSX [ERX JSV I\XVE XI\XYEP GSRJYWMSR
40
The Round
Also, Esquire thought that we were attempting some sort of cockeyed cross-promotion through doing so, and put the OMFSWL SR MX VMKLX E[E] )ZIR WS - WXMPP ORS[ [LS XLI real reporter for that piece was. &YX - GER¸X LIPT FYX JIIP EW XLSYKL - QEYRHIVIH EX WSQI TSMRX MR 4IVVMR¸W HIZIPSTQIRX´[LEX IPWI GSYPH EGGSYRX JSV XLI µ[SSHIR JYVXMZIRIWW#¶ ,MW VEOMWL GLEVQ HMHR¸X XVERWPEXI EW - LEH GEPMFVEXIH LMW µFYPPMWLRIWW¶ [EW HIEH MR XLI [EXIV ;LIVI [EW XLI OMRO# 7LSYPH - RSX LEZI KMZIR XLEX GLMPH XLEX FEV SJ WSET# ;EW MX inauthentic# 3V [EW MX XLI JEYPX TYR# (SIW 4IVVMR RSX PMOI LMW +YMRRIWW knobby# 7SQI[LIVI - erred.
41
Heart, Bridget Sauer Charcoal and Ink, 2’ x 4’
That day we watched streets move like islands
1EHIPIMRI 3¸2IMPP That day we watched streets move like islands. There was ER SZIVPETTMRK QIXEP WGVIIGL FYVRMRK XSRKYIW EKEMRWX LIEVXW ,S[ PSRK XMPP ,I HVSZI PSRK FI]SRH FVMHKIW ÂEQI WXEMRIH ERH LYRKV] FSVI JSVOW MR where home is. Late lunches still later. Still later. 0EXIV 7XMPP RSX WXMPP PEXIV 3YX [MRHS[W WLI [EZIH [LMXI ERH WXMPP WO] EWL WO] I]IW VSPPIH E[E] 6SPPMRK WO] I]IW E[E] over ERXW MR FSFFMRK MWPERH XS[IVW 7XMPP VSPPMRK PEXIV 6SPP LIV [EZMRK [LMXI EGVSWW SVFW [SVPHW [EZI EX LIV JEV XS XSYGL ,S[ JEV XMPP 'PSWI IRSYKL we smell dripping metal hands, shaking concrete LIEHW GYVPMRK SMP XMTTIH XSIW ;IX MR ÂEQI WXMPP 0EXIV LI WXSTTIH WYRO YRHIV FVMHKIW HVIEQIH PEXIV PYRGLIW still. Later on we will dry metal hands, nod concrete heads, straighten oil-tipped toes. Later still, stop her waving white [MXL JEV JIXGLIH FMPPW 7XMPP RSX WXMPP PEXIV Later we will eat canned for weeks. How much till. Late lunches still later, sky eyes still rolling. Stretch watery [MRKW FIEV XSRKYI XSYGLIH LIEVXW 7LI [EPOIH [LMVPTSSPW frothing [LMXI WXMPP ERXW MR FYVMIH LMPPW ;LIVI LSQI MW [I [ITX Still worlds wave. Later on we moved for inches, islands ate feet. Still. Still we watched streets that had moved like islands. Later, where home is, all was still.
43
a barnloft of horse dreams
/IZMR 4MVIW MRWTMVIH F] 'EVSP]R *SVGLq¸W Blue Hour E FEVRPSJX SJ LSVWI HVIEQW [MXL FEWMRW ERH FIHGPSXLIW MW where she spent that long winter waiting through tense and endless nights for a letter from no one in particular FYX EHHVIWWIH XS LIV LIV XLI SRI XLEX WPITX MR E FIH SJ LIV S[R LEMV WSJX PMOI E KSSWI¸W HS[R FYX MRO] [MXL QIQSVMIW XLEX WLI LEH TYVKIH while quietly waiting for her letter to arrive once in a dream, a dream she never quite accepted as her S[R WLI WE[ LIVWIPJ HMT LIV LERHW KIRXP] MRXS XLI FEWMR watching as the drops of water would gather in the ridges of her wrinkled skin like young soldiers in some distant, QMWX] FEXXPIÁIPH and when she awoke, not quite sure if she had slept or if the WYFXPI XVERGI WLI LEH FIIR MR [EW WPIIT EX EPP XLI TSWXQER had arrived and with him came the letter the one addressed to her from no in particular and she threw it in the pile with the rest XLI VIWX SJ XLI PIXXIVW XLEX LEH GSQI ERH JYPÁPPIH SRP] E TEWWMRK QSQIRX¸W HIWMVI JSV XLI WMKLX SJ SRI¸W REQI SR TETIV MR ERSXLIV¸W LERH ÂIIXMRK IZMHIRGI XLEX XLEX REQI WXMPP FIPSRKIH XS LIV
45
Now That We’re Single
1SI^ 7YVERM µ2S =SY¸VI XLI WEQI =SY LEZIR¸X GLERKIH ¶ 8LI] WMX REOIH SR XLI FIH [MXL E TPEXI SJ JVYMX FIX[IIR XLIQ 8LIVI EVI WXVE[FIVVMIW ERH VMRWIH FPYIFIVVMIW SR XLI TPEXI µ=SY¸VI XLMRRIV ¶ WLI WE]W µFYX ]SY¸VI XLI WEQI =SY HSR¸X PMOI XLI WXVE[FIVVMIW#¶ µ- PMOI XLIQ &YX [LEX IPWI LEZI ]SY FIIR HSMRK# %TEVX JVSQ XLI NSFW#¶ She reaches for the fruit. “It was nice how we met again. =SY [IVIR¸X´]SY WIIQIH XS WXMPP PSZI QI -X [EW LS[ ]SY WTSOI =SY [IVIR¸X GSPH ¶ µ&YX [LEX IPWI#¶ µ%TEVX JVSQ XLI NSFW# - [EW [SVOMRK XLIR - UYMX ERH [IRX XVEZIPPMRK - XLSYKLX - [SYPH RIZIV GSQI FEGO - [IRX MR E GMVGPI +IVQER] 4VEKYI 4SPERH ,EZI ]SY FIIR XS /VEOS[#¶ “No.” µ=SY¸ZI FIIR IZIV][LIVI IPWI 8LIR &YHETIWX 'VSEXME 7EVENIZS 1] WLSIW [IVI WXSPIR MR +IVQER] - PIJX XLIQ XS dry in the hall and in the morning they were gone. They [IVI PMXXPI WERHEPW XLEX - FSYKLX Q]WIPJ FIJSVI XLI XVMT 8LEX [EW E ]IEV EKS XLSYKL 6IGIRXP]# - HSR¸X ORS[ - [EW EPWS
47
Now That We’re Single, Moez Surani
HEXMRK WSQISRI &YX - HMHR¸X VIEPM^I LI [EW ER EPGSLSPMG ¶ µ,S[ GER ]SY RSX VIEPM^I#¶ µ- HMHR¸X PSZI LMQ ¶ WLI WE]W WLEOMRK LIV LIEH µ- [EW WMGO ERH LI FVSYKLX QI WSYT XLEX LI QEHI JSV PYRGL FYX LI [EW HVYRO ;LEX MW MX#¶ “Nothing.” µ2S [LEX [IVI ]SY KSMRK XS WE]#¶ “Nothing,” he says. µ=SY GER WE] [LEX ]SY [ERX XS WE] -X¸W ]SY 8LIR - HEXIH WSQISRI [LS [EW EP[E]W XIPPMRK QI EFSYX LMW HVE[MRKW - asked to see them and when I said I liked them he wanted to marry me. He had enough money. He wanted to move SYX SJ XLI GMX] ,I XSPH QI LI LEH IRSYKL QSRI] XS FY] E LSYWI ERH WXEVX E JEQMP] [MXL QI ;I LEH FIIR HEXMRK for two weeks. He just wanted a wife for his house. He HMHR¸X IZIR ORS[ QI ¶ 7LI VIEGLIW JSV QSVI JVYMX µ- LEH XS WXST ERW[IVMRK Q] TLSRI ,I OITX GEPPMRK ,I GSYPHR¸X YRHIVWXERH ¶ 7LI FMX E PEVKI WXVE[FIVV] ERH PSSOIH EX LMQ µ;I GSYPHR¸X XEPO PMOI XLMW FIJSVI -X¸W FIGEYWI RS[ [I¸VI single.” µ;I GSYPH XEPO FIJSVI ¶ “No.” µ;I YWIH XS XEPO EFSYX IZIV]XLMRK ¶
48
The Round
µ2SX EFSYX XLMRKW PMOI XLMW 2SX EFSYX WPIITMRK [MXL TISTPI -¸Q IEXMRK EPP SJ ]SYV JVYMX ¶ WLI [LMWTIVW µ- VIQIQFIV ]SY XIPPMRK QI EFSYX ]SYV ÁVWX XMQI ¶ µ8LEX¸W HMJJIVIRX ¶ “The American.” µ-X¸W FIGEYWI ]SY¸VI HMJJIVIRX RS[ =SY¸VI GEPQIV ¶ ,I WQSSXLIW XLI FIH WLIIX [MXL LMW LERH µ=SY ORS[ XLEX [LIR ]SY WE] MX PMOI XLEX ]SY¸VI FPEQMRK QI ¶ “No.” µ,S[ - [EW XLI TVSFPIQ FYX RS[ XLEX -¸ZI GLERKIH´¶ µ=SY ORS[ [LEX - QIER 2S[ ]SY¸VI QEH ¶ “No.” µ=IW =SY [SR¸X IZIR PSSO EX QI ¶ “You were there. You had a role too.” “I know I did.” µ7S XLIR#¶ 7LI WUYII^IW LMW ÁRKIVW µ- EXI EPP SJ ]SYV JVYMX ¶ WLI ÁREPP] [LMWTIVW µ- YWIH XS HVIEQ EFSYX ]SY )ZIR [LIR - [EW HEXMRK SXLIVW 8LIR - [SYPH LEZI XS WMX XLVSYKL FVIEOJEWX
49
Now That We’re Single, Moez Surani
[MXL XLIQ MR XLI QSVRMRK ERH XEPO [MXL XLIQ FYX - NYWX wanted to know where you were and how you were.” ,I VMWIW JVSQ XLI FIH ERH GEVVMIW XLI TPEXI XS XLI OMXGLIR ,I FVYWLIW XLI WXVE[FIVV] WXIQW MRXS XLI KEVFEKI *VSQ XLI FIH WLI LIEVW XLI OMXGLIR XET VYR µ%VI ]SY PIEZMRK XLI [MRHS[ STIR#¶ “I can close it if you like.” µ2S ¶ WLI ]IPPW µ-X¸W ÁRI ¶ ,I GSQIW FEGO MRXS XLI FIHVSSQ WLYXXMRK XLI PMKLXW SJJ EW LI TEWWIW XLVSYKL LMW ETEVXQIRX -R FIH WLI VIEGLIW JSV his hand and holds it with hers. The wind and the noise from outside come into the apartment. Trucks pass in the street. µ=SY¸VI XLI WEQI =SY¸VI I\EGXP] XLI WEQI ¶
50
Translation of Alessandro de Francesco
&IPPI 'YWLMRK
assente obliqua PE HMWXIWE GLI WM IWXIRHI HMIXVS PI GSRGLMKPMI r YRE cancellazione un nodo di lucciole un gergo condiviso nel passato di fronte al mare ha avuto luogo venendo da dietro glissavamo nelle WGEREPEXYVI RIM VMWZSPXM MRXIVRM HIPPE WYTIVĂ GMI KVMKME del detrito
52
The  Round
absent oblique XLI I\TERWI XLEX I\XIRHW FI]SRH XLI WLIPPW MW E cancellation a knot of glowworms a slang shared in the past against the sea it took TPEGI GSQMRK JVSQ FILMRH [I WOEXIH MR XLI grooves in the interior folds of the gray surface SJ XLI HIFVMW
53
Translation, Belle Cushing
il tentativo di descrivere nasce dallo stupore del reale soprattutto per chi con il reale aveva in partenza poco a che fare a che sentire e si muoveva in uno spazio opaco incastonato nelle pieghe della materia interna GSQI MR YR¸IWGVIWGIR^E MR YR GVEXIVI QE GSR M TIPM HIRXVS I GSWE G¸r MR UYIM ZEWM GLI WEXYVERS MP XEZSPS GSR MP PSVS ZSPYQI MPPYQMREXS HE YR¸EWWIRXI PYGI SFPMUYE PI PSVS GYVZI TEVPERS MR YRE KISQIXVME HIP TSWWMFMPI MR YR accrescimento del mondo a cui si accede per il vuoto nero dallo sfondo
54
The Round
XLI [MPP XS HIWGVMFI MW FSVR JVSQ XLI WXYTSV SJ XLI VIEP IWTIGMEPP] JSV SRI [LS MR XLI FIKMRRMRK LEH PMXXPI XS HS [MXL the real little to feel and who moved in an opaque space cast in the folds of interior matter EW MR ER I\GVIWGIRGI MR E GVEXIV FYX SRI XLEX¸W LEMV] MRWMHI ERH [LEX MW XLIVI MR XLIWI ZEWIW XLEX WEXYVEXI XLI XEFPI [MXL XLIMV ZSPYQI MPPYQMREXIH F] ER EFWIRX SFPMUYI PMKLX XLIMV GYVZIW WTIEO MR E KISQIXV] SJ XLI TSWWMFPI MR ER EYKQIRXEXMSR SJ XLI [SVPH EGGIWWIH F] [E] SJ XLI FPEGO ZSMH SJ XLI FEGOKVSYRH
55
Translation, Belle Cushing
in altri vasi invece la realtà si sfoca si stacca dalle cose e poi si sovrappone ad esse in pieno giorno tre spugne EWWSVFSRS MP FYMS I MP FVYWMS HIP TSQIVMKKMS IRXVE MR YRE WGEXSPE FMERGE WXEGGEXE HEP VIWXS I GSQI REWGSWXE KYEVHERHSXM RSR VMYWGMZS E HMVXM GLI GIVGEVI r PE QME JSVQE HM KMSME GLI P¸EZIV TIVWS KMSGERHS UYIPP¸SKKIXXS RIPP¸IVFE r WXEXS TM MQTSVXERXI HM XYXXI PI EPXVI GSWI RIPPE WXER^E TM HIPPE WXIWWE MRJER^ME
56
The Round
MR SXLIV ZEWIW LS[IZIV VIEPMX] MW FPYVVIH MW HIXEGLIH JVSQ XLMRKW ERH XLIR MW WYTIVMQTSWIH SR XLIQ MR FVSEH HE]PMKLX XLVII WTSRKIW EFWSVF XLI FPEGO WTEGI ERH XLI [LMXI RSMWI SJ XLI EJXIVRSSR KSIW MR E FS\ HIXEGLIH JVSQ the rest as if hidden watching you i could not tell you that searching is my form SJ NS] XLEX LEZMRK PSWX XLMW SFNIGX MR XLI KVEWW [EW QSVI important than all other things in the room more than childhood itself
57
Translation, Belle Cushing
PE QIQFVERE HIP JYRKS RIPPE GIWXE WSVKI HMIXVS MP TERRS FMERGS TSXVIFFI REWGSRHIVWM YR GSVTS GLI GLMIHI EMYXS GLI GIVGE YR EPXVS GSVTS RIP FYMS HIPPS WJSRHS ÁPXVE P¸SQFVE HEPPE FYGGME TSVSWE I MQTIVJIXXE HIPPI TIVI SVMIRXEXI MR TM HMVI^MSRM MR TM VIEPXk PE VIXI HIPPI strade che percorrono il melone esce dal tavolo genera uno spazio sferico solo la faccia esposta si dà alla ZMWMSRI GSQI ÁRSVE E UYERXS TEVI r WXEXS per la luna
58
The Round
XLI QIQFVERI SJ XLI QYWLVSSQ MR XLI FEWOIX IQIVKIW FILMRH XLI [LMXI GPSXL E FSH] GSYPH LMHI MXWIPJ XLEX EWOW JSV LIPT XLEX PSSOW JSV ERSXLIV FSH] MR XLI HEVO FEGOKVSYRH XLI WLEHS[ ÁPXIVW JVSQ XLI TSVSYW imperfect skin of the pears arrayed in all directions in all realities the net of streets that run across the QIPSR IQIVKIW JVSQ XLI XEFPI KIRIVEXIW E WTLIVMGEP space only the displayed face gives itself YT XS FI WIIR EW YRXMP RS[ EW MX WIIQW MX [EW for the moon
59
Translation, Belle Cushing
MP TMEXXS MRGPMREXS HEPPI PIKKM HIP VMÂIWWS P¸IPMGE JSVQEXE HEPPE FYGGME HIPP¸EKVYQI MR HMWGIWE PE WXER^E EWWSVFMXE RIP ZIXVS HIP FMGGLMIVI ETTIRE TIVGITMFMPI nel nero che cresce MP TSQIVMKKMS r TVSMIXXEXS WYPPE WXSJJE P¸SGGLMS STEGS HIPP¸ERMQEPI ÁWWE PE GEQIVE P¸YZE r UYEWM XVEWTEVIRXI WGSTTME PE QIQFVERE HIPPE FSXXMKPME SFPMUYE e collassano gli oggetti che avevamo disposto dentro al piano sequenza
60
The Round
XLI TPEXI FIRX F] XLI PE[W SJ VIÂIGXMSR XLI LIPM\ JSVQIH F] XLI GMXVYW TIIP MR HIWGIRX XLI VSSQ EFWSVFIH F] XLI KPEWW FEVIP] TIVGITXMFPI MR XLI KVS[MRK FPEGORIWW XLI EJXIVRSSR MW TVSNIGXIH SR XLI JEFVMG XLI STEUYI KE^I SJ XLI ERMQEP Á\IW XLI GEQIVE XLI KVETI MW EPQSWX XVERWTEVIRX XLI QIQFVERI SJ XLI SFPMUYI FSXXPI FYVWXW ERH XLI SFNIGXW GSPPETWI the ones we had placed within the sequence shot
61
Translation,  Belle  Cushing
Ă PMTTS HI TMWMW natura morta marina SPMS WY GEVXSRI XIPEXS GQ \
JVERGMWGS HI ^YVFEVjR natura morta GE SPMS WY XIPE GQ \ (giorgio morandi natura morta SPMS WY XIPE GQ \ (louis melĂŠndez natura morta con melone e pere GE SPMS WY XIPE GQ \ (willem kalf natura morta con frutta bicchieri e piatto epoca wan-li SPMS WY XIPE GQ \ (willem van aelst natura morta su tavolo con vasi preziosi frutta e un fagiano SPMS WY XIPE GQ \
62
The  Round
Ă PMTTS HI TMWMW ocean still life SMP SR GEVHFSEVH GQ \
JVERGMWGS HI ^YVFEVER still life GE SMP SR GERZEW GQ \ (giorgio morandi still life SMP SR GERZEW GQ \ (louis melĂŠndez still life with melon and pears GE SMP SR GERZEW GQ \ (willem kalf still life with fruit glass and wan-li plate SMP SR GERZEW GQ \ (willem van aelst still life on a table with precious vases fruit and a pheasant SMP SR GERZEW GQ \
63
1EQQSR EX ;MRÁIPH 4EVO
.YWXMR ;]QIV
After Forrest Gander *PMGOIV XLMW WMHI SJ LYQERRIWW 4IVWIMH¸W WLS[IV WTMRW E few hours. Lights dampening the pond-ice like lumenÂIGOW WYKEV WTMPPIH JVSQ TSGOIXW )EGL MW HVIWWIH MR WLEHI RSX PMKLX ,MW WLMVX GSYPH FI E QSYVRMRK GPSEO &] XLI SPH IPQ MR XLI [MRHS[ JSVQIH F] WXMJJ FVERGLIW E JSVKSXXIR NEGOIX WXMVVIH F] [MRH LERKMRK XLIVI 8VITMHEXMSR¸W IJÁK] &YVRMRK YT MR MRWIGXW¸ XEMPPMKLX -XW PMQTMH ÁRKIV FPS[W TSMRXMRK XS[EVH XLI [EXIV¸W IHKI ,I GLIGOW LMW S[R FVIEXL ERH WQIPPW LIVW OMWWIW LIV JVE]MRK GYXMGPIW 7OMR WXVMRKMRK SJJ XLIQ PMOI [MVI JVSQ E GLERHIPMIV PSWX MR FIEGL WERH 9T HVEJX JVSQ XLI KVSYRHJVII^I 8LI RSWI FMXI SJ *IFVYEV] WET MW WXVSRK 2IEVMRK XLI WQEPP VMZYPIX HVEMRMRK SZIVÂS[ JVSQ XLI TSRH E ]SYRK FS] ORIIPW GSSPMRK LMW FYVRX [MRKW MR XLI KMR GPIEV [EXIV 3R XLI TIEO E WLVMZIPIH mess hall. At stakes with themselves, crumpling inward. As if knowing the pressure of tectonically deformed hearts. 8LI WLIPXIV¸W GVYHI JYVRMWLMRKW ;E\ WLIPPEG TIIPMRK SJJ XEFPIW PMOI RIKPIGXIH FSYUYIX [VETTIVW &PEGO XLI WSYRH SJ FPEGO 8LI TSRH GVMROPIH [MHI STIR
64
Floating Ghost, Eleanor Leonne Bennett Photograph
Stepladders, Eleanor Leonne Bennett Photograph
Shot Down, Eleanor Leonne Bennett Photograph
+MZMRK 1EV] E 4MERS 0IWWSR
.IWWMGE =SYRK 3R 8YIWHE] - KEZI 1EV] LIV [IIOP] TMERS PIWWSR %W EP[E]W WLI EVVMZIH SR XMQI [MXL LIV TVEGXMGI FSSOW XYGOIH YRHIV LIV EVQ [MTIH LIV WLSIW´VMKLX PIJX VMKLX´[LMPI WIXXMRK HS[R LIV FSSOW SR XLI WIGSRH WXEMV VIQSZIH LIV GSEX VIXVMIZIH LIV FSSOW WEMH Hello, how are you this week? and as always I said My dear, I am quite well, and I hope you are the same. Now. Music. No use talking. We walked to the piano, WMHI F] WMHI MR SYV [IIOP] VMXYEP ERH - WMPIRXP] X[MWXIH ERH pulled, lifted and levered, and as if unlacing a tie, my hands moved MR GSRGIVX XLI FS\ WYHHIRP] STIR 8LI WXVMRKW I\TSWIH X[MXGLIH WPMKLXP] 'SQJSVXMRK´XLMW WEQI WSYRH RS QEXXIV the temperature, season, student. In them, constancy. % [IPGSQI GSRXVSP 1EV]¸W ÁRKIVW QE] XVIQFPI SV XLI] QE] FIRH FIEYXMJYPP] SZIV XLIQWIPZIW FYX YRHIVRIEXL XLIQ XLMW WEQI [EZI XLMW WEQI ZMFVEXMSR RS QEXXIV [LEX %RH -¸ZI PIEVRIH MJ - JSGYW SR XLMW - GER XYRI SYX IZIV]XLMRK else.
69
I heard her practicing piano, and this is what I thought:
.IWWMGE =SYRK 8LI FSH] SJ SYV TMERS MW QEXXI XLI SZIVLIEH PMKLX not exactly WLMRMRK SR MX FYX TIVLETW KVEMR MRK 8LMW FPEGO [SSH from maple trees. 8LI FEGO SJ SYV TMERS opens as all doors do, hinged, opens out, up, insides faintly reminiscent pulsing warm organs. 1] FSH] MW WXMPP MR XLMW VSSQ - WII LIV Ă RKIV EW MJ MX [IVI QMRI move, quick, to depress a key. The non-ivory, the spruce, silken under me, the tiniest ZEPPI]W FIX[IIR % ERH & & ERH '
ERH (
70
The Round
The light-glint off the notes we have played most. The A sounds like it always has in this room; from corners more than walls. This piano-lid opens into something I am drawn to. If I run Q] ÁRKIVXMTW EGVSWW XLI ÂEX ERH TVMRXIH RSXIW - QMKLX LIEV XLIQ from a place I knew the way to those years ago. But in this room, I fear, they no longer recall how to end the gnossienne. Why can I not
VIGSKRM^I XLMW HEVO FSH] LIVI#
;L] HSIW WLI KIX XS#
71
,YVV] 9T 4PIEWI -X¸W 8MQI
Lucy Kissel T Q ) 6 7X :MRGIRX¸W He half-smiles; half of him smiles. I don’t mean to be an asshole. It’s just my nature, you see! ,I LEH E WXVSOI MR XLI HSGXSV¸W SJÁGI XLI TSHMEXVMWX¸W SJÁGI The neurologist scrapes his left leg with a small hammer. Does this feel normal? Yes, normal. If you got that blond nurse over here, it could feel fantastic. According to the neurologist, the podiatrist told a joke. It was funny and he started to laugh. Where is Rita? So funny, in fact, that he could not stop laughing. Bring me some suntan lotion! And then his face froze, just like that, midlaugh.
73
Hurry Up Please It’s Time, Lucy Kissel
Scratch my back. 8LI TSHMEXVMWX GEPPIH XLI EQFYPERGI ÁZI ERH E LEPJ QMRYXIW later. ,I¸W RS FVEMR WYVKISR XLEX TSHMEXVMWX Where is Rita? I wonder what the joke was. I wonder what was so funny. T Q ) 6 7X :MRGIRX¸W &I GEVIJYP [MXL Q] LERHW - EQ E [SVPH VIRS[RIH TMERS player…
…I can see by the look on your face that you do not believe me, which is very stupid. T Q ) 6 7X :MRGIRX¸W % RYVWI XEOIW LMQ XS XLI FEXLVSSQ Are you aware, that at this very moment, you are participating in a play within a play?
74
The Round
T Q ) 6 7X :MRGIRX¸W He adjusts his johnny gown, looks down. I can’t walk down the street in these paper shoes! T Q ) 6 7X :MRGIRX¸W Can you feel this? Feel what? That isn’t good. I mean yes, yes. I can feel it. Can you feel it now? Yes. That was a trick question. I already stopped moving the pen. - LEZIR¸X WIIR XLEX XVMGO FIJSVI -X¸W RSX E ZIV] KSSH XVMGO T Q ) 6 7X :MRGIRX¸W Help me stand up. Right now right now right now. You can’t stand up. Which is why I ask.
75
Hurry Up Please It’s Time, Lucy Kissel
T Q ) 6 7X :MRGIRX¸W A nurse hands us menus. What do you want tonight? :MW k ZMW WYWXIRERGI WTIGMÁGEPP]# How about some chicken and mashed potatoes? %FWSPYXIP] RSX =SY¸H LEZI XS LSPH E KYR XS Q] LIEH ÁVWX %RH then, probably not even then. Salad? - [SYPH WSSRIV GLST SJJ EPP SJ Q] S[R ÁRKIVW Fruit? Where is Rita? At home. But where is she really? E Q ) 6 7X :MRGIRX¸W You have his same hands, you know. La
la
Same hands! E Q Sloan-Kettering I’m not really supposed to be here. 76
The Round
,I PSSOW ]SYRK WMXXMRK SR XLI IHKI SJ LMW FIH LEMV disheveled. T Q Sloan-Kettering 4PIEWI GEPP 6MXE MQQIHMEXIP] Okay. Immediately. I am. ,I SRP] FIPMIZIW LEPJ SJ [LEX LI LIEVW ,I LEW XS LIEV everything twice. Where are my socks? On your feet. Where is my robe? On your body. What else do I need? Need for what? To perpetuate this wild charade! T Q Sloan-Kettering I need to give you something…
…Take this take this take this take this!
77
Hurry Up Please It’s Time, Lucy Kissel
Okay! What is it? It’s a tissue with my snot in it. T Q Sloan-Kettering -J ]SY ORI[ LS[ QYGL - PSZIH ]SY ]SY [SYPH ÂMT ]SYV [MK 8LERO ]SY -J ]SY ORI[ LS[ QYGL - PSZIH ]SY ]SY [SYPH ÂMT your wig! That’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. Write that down. Email that to me. Write that down. T Q Sloan-Kettering I faked it all. Me and a couple of smart doctors. He winks. Why would you do a thing like that? Because we needed to explain, somehow, how I got so fucked up. He leans forward, makes his eyes wide. Is my version of events any more preposterous than yours? He half-smiles; half of him smiles.
78
4IRIPSTI
7EVEL (EP] *EV FI]SRH XLI [MHI WIE I hold the small island, alive with color, threaded with hope. 'PSWIV GPSWIV I look, though I see that it is nothing FYX WMPO pieced together F] Q] loom.
79
4LSXS 8VERWJSVQEXMSR
)PM^EFIXL ,S[SVX *EGI SJJ MR XLI OMXGLIR 0YGEW FPYVVMRK SYX SJ XLI Ă‚IWL waving wall-washed newsprint while psychedelic lips talk to the TV. The screen faces him, HVEQE FPEVMRK KIWXYVI the sex of this fantasy gone red. Black and white checkered linoleum. Lucas morphs into a king, 8: WIX E UYIIR Ă‚EWLMRK an advertisement for shampoo. Lucas puts his platforms on, does the disco ass naked. She turns the room green. ,I QM\IW LMW Ă RKIVW SR XLI WXSZI She gives him the weather. 8LI VIJVMKIVEXSV LYQW E GETXMZI F]WXERHIV 6IEH] JSV FVIEOJEWX RS[ Lucas lowers the volume, Ă PPW XLI XSEWXIV WPMGIW LMW 4SPEVSMHW [MXL NEQ
81
Max Brod Dreams
0MP] 1I]IV For Jude *SV HMRRIV LI JVMIW E TMIGI SJ PEQF SR XLI WXSZI WPMGIW E XSQEXS QE]FI IEXW E JI[ VYKIPEGL SV E TMIGI SJ LEPZEL EJterwards with his tea. Usually he starts eating around seven S¸GPSGO ÁRMWLIW EX WIZIR ÁJXIIR SV X[IRX] FIJSVI HYWO MR XLI WYQQIV 8LIVI MW XSS QYGL HE] PIJX EJXIV[EVHW ,I¸W HSRI [MXL XLI HE]¸W [SVO JSV XLI XLIEXIV LMW JVMIRHW EVI EX home with their wives, and he does not want to write, now, FIGEYWI [LS [MPP VIEH MX PEXIV &IXXIV XLEX XLI] VIEH SXLIV TISTPI &IXXIV XLEX XLI] VIEH .I[W [LS [VMXI MR ,IFVI[ RSX MR +IVQER ,I [MPP ÁRMWL XLMW FSSO XLEX LI HVEKW SYX of himself during the day, this Die Musik Israels, and then he will stop. 7SQIXMQIW [LIR LI¸W ÁRMWLIH IEXMRK LI [EPOW XS XLI GIQIXIV] KMZIW E JI[ GSMRW XS XLI %VEF FIKKEV [MXL SRI EVQ ERH WM\ ÁRKIVW [LS WMXW SYXWMHI XLI KEXI XLIR WIXXPIW HS[R F] )PWE ERH TYXW E TIFFPI SR LIV KVEZIWXSRI ERH WE]W E UYMGO /EHHMWL XLIR XEPOW XS LIV EFSYX PMXXPI XLMRKW RSX XLI FSSO SV -WVEIP SV HVIEQW ,I XIPPW LIV EFSYX XLI QIEPW LI EXI XLEX HE] ERH XLI [IEXLIV QE]FI XLI WYRWIX MJ MX¸W FIKYR EPVIEH] ERH LS[ XLI 3VXLSHS\ JEQMP] RI\X HSSV MW LEZMRK ERSXLIV FEF] ERH XLIMV PEWX SRI XLI JSYVXIIR QSRXL SPH NYWX WEMH LMW ÁVWX [SVH ERH MX [EW MR ,IFVI[ 3JXIR LI VIEHW LIV SRI SJ /EJOE¸W WXSVMIW [LMGL WLI PSZIH NYWX EW QYGL EW LI HSIW -R 4VEKYI FIJSVI [LIR /EJOE [EW H]MRK ERH XSPH LMQ [LEX
83
Max Brod Dreams, Lily Meyer
LI [ERXIH [LEX MX QIERX XS FI LMW I\IGYXSV MX [EW )PWE [LS ÁVWX WEMH µ=SY HSR¸X LEZI XS FYVR XLI WXSVMIW 1E\ ,I [SR¸X ORS[ ¶ -X [EW )PWE [LS GSRZMRGIH LMQ XLEX MX [SYPH FI [SVWI XS HIWXVS] LMW JVMIRH¸W [SVO XLER XS HMWSFI] LMW JVMIRH¸W [MWLIW 3XLIV HE]W LI KSIW XS XLI FIEGL F] XLI 8IP %ZMZ 1EVMRE FY]W fruit juice from one of the carts on the pier and watches the water crash on the packed dirty sand. When he and Elsa PIJX 4VEKYI ERH WLI GVMIH SR XLI WLMT FIGEYWI WLI EPVIEH] QMWWIH )YVSTI ERH [ERXIH XS FI )YVSTIER WXMPP ERH RSX NYWX E .I[ LI¸H WEMH µ&YX FIEGLIW )PWE &IEGLIW ERH TEPQ XVIIW [LIRIZIV [I [ERX 2S QSVI [MRXIV RS[ ¶ ERH WLI¸H WQMPIH FIGEYWI WLI LEXIH [MRXIV QSVI XLER ER]XLMRK %JXIV XLI GEQTW [LIR XLI RI[WTETIVW TYFPMWLIH XLI TMGXYVIW LI¸H WXEVIH EX XLIQ ERH LIEVH )PWE¸W XLVII ]IEVW HIEH ZSMGI WE]MRK µ8LI] QYWX LEZI FIIR WS GSPH 8LI] PSSO WS GSPH ¶ ,I KSIW XS XLI QEVOIX WSQI IZIRMRKW XSS ERH [EPOW FItween the stalls as the vendors pack up the fruit and vegeXEFPIW ERH FVIEH ERH W[IIXW XLI] LEZIR¸X WSPH EW XLI FYXGLIVW TSYV FYGOIXW SJ [EXIV SR XLI KVSYRH [LIVI FPSSH LEW HVMTTIH JVSQ XLIMV QIEX ERH XLI ÁWLQSRKIVW XSWW PIJXSZIV heads and tails into the shadows for the street cats to eat. They all smile and nod at him, say, “Erev tov,” occasionally SJJIV LMQ E TMIGI SJ FEOPEZE E LERHJYP SJ HEXIW E TVMGOP] TIEV XLI] GER¸X WIPP XSQSVVS[ ERH [SR¸X IEX XSRMKLX 3RI FVIEH ZIRHSV MR TEVXMGYPEV EPQSWX EP[E]W KMZIW LMQ WSQIXLMRK E WIWEQI FEKIP SV E FEK SJ TVIX^IPW ERH [LEXIZIV MX MW IZIR MJ MX¸W WXEPI EPVIEH] LI XEOIW MX [VETTIH MR FVS[R TETIV ERH WMXW ERH IEXW MX SR E TEVO FIRGL FIJSVI LI KSIW home.
84
The Round
There are days, too, when he is especially lonely and his ETEVXQIRX JIIPW FMK ERH WQEPP EX XLI WEQI XMQI ERH XSS IQTX] FSXL [E]W [LIR LI KSIW XS 1EHEQ 0]YHQMPE¸W LSYWI SR 6ILSZ ,E ,EWLQEP 8LI KMVPW [LS [SVO XLIVI ORS[ LMQ EW &VSHWO] ERH XLI] EP[E]W EGX KPEH XS WII LMQ EP[E]W FSYRGI YT ERH HS[R SR XLI FEPPW SJ XLIMV JIIX WE]MRK µ,S[ EVI ]SY 1V &VSHWO]# -X¸W FIIR WS PSRK WS PSRK ¶ [LMPI 1EHEQ 0]YHQMPE QSZIW FILMRH XLIQ [LMWTIVMRK MR XLIMV IEVW µ;LS [ERXW XLI SPH QER XSHE]# +IRXPI RSX HIQERHMRK FYX WEKK] ERH LEMV] - ORS[ - ORS[ ;LS¸W YT#¶ %X PIEWX XLEX¸W [LEX LI MQEKMRIW WLI WE]W FYX [LS ORS[W QE]FI MX¸W µ'LEVKI LMQ LEPJ ¶ SV µ'LEVKI LMQ HSYFPI ¶ SV µ(S ]SY ORS[ XLEX LMW VIEP REQI MW 1E\ &VSH# (S ]SY ORS[ [LS 1E\ &VSH MW#¶ 1SWX XMQIW LI TMGOW 'LEZE [LS MW ]SYRK ERH REVVS[ LMTTIH ERH FPSRHI ERH [LS KVMTW LMW WLSYPHIVW ÁIVGIP] [LMPI LI FYVMIW LMQWIPJ MR LIV ERH [LS EJXIV[EVHW [MPP PIX LMQ WPIIT JSV ER LSYV FIJSVI WLI [EOIW LMQ YT ERH WIRHW LMQ [EPOMRK LSQI ;LIR WLI MW FYW] XLSYKL SV JSV WSQI VIEWSR HSIWR¸X EXXVEGX LMQ LI PMOIW ,IPIRE FIGEYWI WLI¸W XLI QSWX IRIVKIXMG SJ 1EHEQ 0]YHQMPE¸W KMVPW ERH IZIR XLSYKL WLI QEOIW LMQ PIEZI LIV VSSQ EW WSSR EW XLI]¸VI done, she wears him out enough that when he gets home he JEPPW EWPIIT VMKLX E[E] ERH HSIWR¸X [SVV] EFSYX LMW HVIEQW ,I LEW SXLIV [E]W XSS XS OIIT LMQWIPJ JVSQ XLMROMRK EFSYX HVIEQMRK [MRI ZSHOE WXE]MRK E[EOI YRXMP WYRVMWI ERH writing, though that only works during the less and less frequent periods when he actually wants to write. But he LEW XS KIX YT IZIV] QSVRMRK ERH FI 1E\ &VSH ERH WS QSWX nights he gives in and goes to sleep and dreams one of the three dreams that he has had every night, every one without exception, every goddamned night since the morning
85
Max Brod Dreams, Lily Meyer
XLEX LI [SOI YT MR 4VEKYI ERH [IRX XS WPIIT SR E WLMT [MXL XLI 2E^MW EX LMW FEGO ERH JSV XLI ÁVWX XMQI MR E REVVS[ FIVXL [MXL )PWE RI\X XS LMQ HVIEQIH´ One: The Dream of Fire starts with the sounds of crackling ERH LMWWMRK ERH GSEPW JEPPMRK ERH FVIEOMRK ERH LI XLMROW 3L RS TPIEWI RS ERH XLIR XLI KPS[ FIKMRW EVSYRH LMW JIIX EW MJ LI [IVI SR E T]VI FYX XLEX MWR¸X XLI HVIEQ ,I [MWLIW XLEX [IVI XLI HVIEQ FYX RS XLI KPS[ QSZIW ERH XLI WSYRHW move up his legs, they wind around his legs like vines and the coals fall from his knees to his ankles, his hips to his WLMRW ERH WQSOI FMPPS[W E[E] JVSQ LMW FSH] ERH XLI KPS[ ERH XLI WSYRHW EVI EX LMW WXSQEGL LMW VMFW LMW EVQTMXW LMW WLSYPHIVW LMW RIGO ERH LI XLMROW 3L RS SL WXST HSR¸X QEOI QI XLEX HSR¸X QEOI QI FYX RS XLI ÁVI MW EX XLI IHKIW of his jaw and he knows in the way that you know in dreams XLEX XLI ÁVI MW QSZMRK XS LMW IEVW ERH MRXS LMW IEV LSPIW ERH XLVSYKL XS LMW FVEMR ERH MJ XLMW [IVIR¸X E HVIEQ LI [SYPH JIIP XLI LIEX MRWMHI LMW WOYPP FYX MX MW E HVIEQ XLI HVIEQ SJ ÁVI ERH XLI ÁVI MW MR LMQ RS[ ERH XLI KPS[ MW IZIV][LIVI ERH LI LIEVW XLI WSYRHW PSYHIV XLER LMW FVIEXLMRK PSYHIV XLER LMW LIEVX ERH LI MW XLI ÁVI ERH XLI ÁVI QEOIW LMQ move lurching like a golem from the dark place where he WXERHW FYVRMRK ERH LI MW SR E WXVIIX RS[ E WXVIIX MR 4VEKYI a different street every time though how many streets can XLIVI FI MR 4VEKYI IWTIGMEPP] SRIW LI HSIWR¸X VIGSKRM^I SV LEW JSVKSXXIR FYX LI MW [EPOMRK HS[R XLI WXVIIX FYVRMRK and he goes left here, right there, thinking Stop it stop it WXST MX WXST FYX RS LI XYVRW PIJX ERH LI¸W SR +SPHIR 7XVIIX ERH LI XIPPW LMQWIPJ 8YVR EVSYRH 1E\ XYVR EVSYRH FYX XLMW MW XLI HVIEQ SJ ÁVI ERH GSEPW EVI JEPPMRK JVSQ LMW RSWI to his chest, his shoulders to his hands, his stomach to his
86
The Round
XLMKLW ERH XLI] FSYRGI XS XLI GSFFPIWXSRIH KVSYRH ERH FVIEO ERH WTEVOW Â] EVSYRH LMQ ERH [LIR LI [EOIW YT LI [MPP VIQIQFIV XLEX XLI ÁVWX XMQI LI LEH XLI HVIEQ FIfore he knew what happens next, he walked in the dream JEWGMREXIH F] XLI WTEVOW EX LMW JIIX PMOI WTEVOW WXVYGO F] ER MVSR WLSH LSVWI VYRRMRK ERH LI XLSYKLX XLEX ÁVWX XMQI XLEX MX [EW E KSSH HVIEQ LI [EW E KSPIQ LI [EW ÁVI MX [EW E KSSH HVIEQ FYX XLIR XLI HVIEQ XSSO LMQ 8LI HVIEQ XEOIW LMQ XS XLI LSYWI SR +SPHIR 7XVIIX [LIVI /EJOE PMZIH [MXL LMW WMWXIV RYQFIV X[IRX] X[S /EJOE [VSXI XLIVI JSV E JI[ ]IEVW LS[ QER] LI GER¸X VIQIQFIV XLI HVIEQ [SR¸X PIX LMQ VIQIQFIV FYX MRWXIEH XEOIW LMQ MRXS XLI LSYWI without opening the door and upstairs without walking up XLI WXEMVW ERH MRXS LMW JVMIRH¸W VSSQ [MXLSYX STIRMRK XLI door and there he is at his desk and there are his stories ERH TETIVW TMPIH EPP EVSYRH [MXL XLI MRO FPSXW ERH XLI FEH handwriting and the crossed-out lines and the paragraphs [MXL <¸W XLVSYKL XLIQ ERH /EJOE EX LMW HIWO ERH LI XYVRW and every time, every one without exception, he waits for /EJOE XS WGVIEQ FIGEYWI LI ORS[W XLEX XLMW MW XLI HVIEQ SJ ÁVI ERH LI MW E ÁVI KSPIQ XLEX RS VEFFM QEHI SV IZIR QIRXMSRIH ERH /EJOE WLSYPH FI EJVEMH FYX RS LI NYWX PSSOW [MXL LMW I]IW FMKKIV ERH FMKKIV [LMPI GSEPW EVI JEPPMRK ERH XLI VSSQ MW ÁPPMRK [MXL WQSOI ERH WTEVOW ERH E WTEVO PERHW SR E TEKI ERH FYVRW E RIEX FPEGO IHKIH LSPI MR E [SVH ERH /EJOE PSSOW EX MX ERH PSSOW E[E] ERH YT ERH WE]W 3L LIPPS 1E\ *VER^ -´ 2MGI [IEXLIV [I¸VI LEZMRK ,SX -´ FYX LI GER¸X WE] ER]XLMRK MX¸W EKEMRWX XLI VYPIW SJ XLI
87
Max Brod Dreams, Lily Meyer
HVIEQ ERH LI XVMIW XS WE] *VER^ *VER^ -¸Q KSMRK XS FYVR MX FYX MRWXIEH LI WXYXXIVW -´ -´ ERH E GSEP JEPPW SR E WXEGO of pages, most often “A Hunger Artist” for some reason, ERH MRWXIEH SJ FYVRMRK SRI LSPI MX MKRMXIW ERH XLI WXSV] MW MR ÂEQIW ERH LI WE]W -´ERH /EJOE WE]W 3L ERH XLI ÁVI jumps to another pile and another and another and another and another and he wakes up sweating. Two: The Dream of Scraps SR XLI GSRGVIXI ÂSSV SJ E GSPH FVMKLX VSSQ WGVETW SJ JSSH SJ MVSR SJ WXIIP SJ FVEWW SJ GSMRW SJ FYPPIX GEWMRKW SJ KPEWW SJ TPEWXMG SJ [SSH SJ FEVO SJ PIEZIW SJ PIEXLIV SJ SMPGPSXL SJ ZIPZIX SJ FYVPET of thread, of twine, of yarn, of shoelaces, of hair, of fur, of ÂIWL SJ WOMR SJ ÁRKIVREMPW SJ RI[WTETIVW SJ GEVHFSEVH SJ PIXXIVW SJ RSZIPW SJ TSIQW SJ LSP] FSSOW SJ XLI XMR] VSPPW SJ TEVGLQIRX MRWMHI QI^Y^SX SJ FMVXL GIVXMÁGEXIW SJ XVEMR XMGOIXW SJ WGVETW ERH LMW [SVO MR XLI GSPH FVMKLX VSSQ MW XS TMIGI XLIQ EPP XSKIXLIV ,I XIPPW LMQWIPJ 2S 1E\ HSR¸X HS MX HSR¸X WXEVX ]SY HSR¸X LEZI XS MX¸W RSX ]SYV NSF MX¸W RSX ER]SRI¸W NSF MX¸W RSX E NSF EX EPP MX¸W XLI HVIEQ SJ WGVETW WXST MX FYX WXMPP LI WMXW HS[R SR XLI GSRGVIXI ÂSSV XLMROMRK -¸PP WXEVX [MXL XLI ]EVR XLMW XMQI XLIVI MWR¸X ZIV] QYGL ]EVR ERH VIEGLIW JSV XLI ÁVWX TMIGI ERH TYXW MX MR XLI WTEGI FIX[IIR LMW GVSWWIH PIKW ERH LMW FSH] ERH RSXLMRK LETTIRW ERH WS he picks up the second piece and the third and the fourth and they are all different colors, all different lengths and thicknesses, and he picks up another piece and there is no more yarn in his reach and he stands up and moves to a RI[ WTSX [MXL XLI ÁZI WGVETW SJ ]EVR GPYXGLIH MR LMW LERH ERH FIJSVI LI WMXW LI KPERGIW SZIV LMW WLSYPHIV XLI TPEGI where he was sitting is full of yarn.
88
The Round
'EVHFSEVH XLIR LI XLMROW ERH EKEMR LI WMXW GVSWWIW LMW PIKW TMGOW YT E WGVET SJ GEVHFSEVH ERH ERSXLIV ERH ERother and leans for another and stretches for another and [MRHQMPPW LMW EVQW EPSRK XLI ÂSSV JSV ERSXLIV ERH ERSXLIV and takes off his shoes and stretches his legs out and pulls in three more with his toes and he cannot see any more GEVHFSEVH ERH LI HIGMHIW -¸PP ÁX XLIWI XSKIXLIV ÁVWX QE]FI XLIR - GER QSZI ERH LI WPMHIW X[S RI\X XS IEGL SXLIV FYX XLI IHKIW GLERKI XLI] VMTTPI ERH KVS[ FYQTW ERH WMRO into themselves, and he tries another pair and one of the scraps crumples, and a third pair and the scraps start to KPS[ MR LMW LERHW ERH MJ XLMW [IVIR¸X E HVIEQ LI [SYPH JIIP XLI LIEX FYX MX MW WS XLI] HSR¸X LYVX FYX LI ORS[W XLI] GER LYVX LMQ FYVR LMQ ERH MJ XLI] HS ERH LI MKRMXIW XLMW GSYPH XYVR MRXS XLI HVIEQ SJ ÁVI XLEX¸W LETTIRIH FIJSVI ERH X[S dreams in one night is more than he can take, and so he lets the scraps fall and moves on to snake skin, or to train tickIXW SV XS ZIPZIX FYX [LEXIZIV MX MW LI GSPPIGXW MX JEWXIV ERH faster and soon he is collecting two, three kinds of scrap at E XMQI LI LEW FYVPET MR LMW VMKLX LERH ERH TEKIW JVSQ LSP] FSSOW MR LMW PIJX ERH LI¸W GPIRGLMRK TPEWXMG FIX[IIR LMW XIIXL ERH LI¸W KIXXMRK WSQI[LIVI [MXL XLI WGVETW LI¸W KIXXMRK WSQI[LIVI ERH HIWTMXI EPP XLI WGVETW LI¸W TMGOIH YT MR LMW QMRH FIJSVI LI¸W TVSYH SJ LMQWIPJ LI¸W KSMRK XS HS MX XLMW XMQI LI¸W KSMRK XS TYX XLIQ EPP FEGO XSKIXLIV VI[VMXI the poems and re-forge the coins and re-make mezuzot out SJ XLI [SSH ERH FVEWW ERH TYX XLI XMR] WGVSPPW FEGO MRWMHI XLIQ LI¸W KSMRK XS HS MX XLMW XMQI ERH WYHHIRP] E WGVET SJ MVSR ÂMIW EGVSWW LMW ÁIPH SJ ZMWMSR XS XLI KVSYRH +SH LI WE]W SYX PSYH SL +SH FYX XLMW MW XLI HVIEQ SJ WGVETW ERH XLI WGVETW EVI JEPPMRK RS[ MX¸W WRS[MRK WGVETW MRWMHI XLI GSPH FVMKLX VSSQ ERH XLI] LMX LMW LIEH ERH XLI
89
Max Brod Dreams, Lily Meyer
FEGO SJ LMW RIGO ERH LMW EVQW ERH LMW XLMKLW ERH LI JIIPW FPSSH VYRRMRK FIX[IIR LMW I]I ERH LMW RSWI ERH MRXS XLI groove next to his nostril and he opens his mouth and GEXGLIW XLI FPSSH FYX XLMW MW E HVIEQ WS LI GERRSX XEWXI MX he only knows that it should taste like metal, like the scrap SJ QIXEP XLEX LI HMHR¸X JIIP FYX ORS[W GYX LMQ ERH RS[ XLI WGVETW EVI JEPPMRK JEWXIV ERH XLMGOIV TETIV ÂYXXIVW EVSYRH LMQ ERH QSVI ERH QSVI TMIGIW SJ QIXEP NEF LMQ ERH XLI scraps are piling around his ankles and settle on his shoulders and he knows he knows he knows what happens next ERH LI PSSOW YT ERH WE]W 7XST TPIEWI WXST FYX E WGVET SJ [SSH LMXW LMW I]I ERH LI KEWTW FIRHW HSYFPI LI¸W EP[E]W FIIR EJVEMH SJ KSMRK FPMRH ERH IZIR MR XLI HVIEQ LI XLMROW LI GER JIIP LMW I]I LYVXMRK ERH XLI WGVETW LMX LMW FEGO ERH settle there and they are heavy, too heavy, and still falling on him fast, faster, and getting heavier and pushing him down until the weight is too much and he falls, collapses JEGIHS[R SR XLI GSRGVIXI ÂSSV ERH XLIVI EVI WGVETW FPSGOMRK LMW QSYXL ERH RSWI ERH LI GERRSX FVIEXLI ERH XLI] EVI WXMPP JEPPMRK JEPPMRK JEPPMRK SR LMQ ERH LI JIIPW LMW VMFW ERH LMW WTMRI KVSERMRK ERH GVYQFPMRK ERH XLI WGVETW EVI WXMPP JEPPMRK JEPPMRK JEPPMRK ERH LI GER¸X FVIEXLI LI MW H]MRK YRHIV scraps and he wakes up gasping for air. Three: The Dream of Holes takes place on a sidewalk, or SR E FIEGL SV MR XLI GSVVMHSV SJ ER ETEVXQIRX FYMPHMRK SV E LSXIP SV SR E FVMHKI ER] TPEGI MR -WVEIP [LIVI LI LEW walked or could walk or may walk, and he is walking, lookMRK JVSQ WMHI XS WMHI WIIMRK QE]FI E TVIXX] [SQER SV E GVYQTPIH RI[WTETIV SV E JI[ GMKEVIXXI FYXXW [EPOMRK RSX ORS[MRK ]IX XLEX XLMW MW XLI HVIEQ SJ LSPIW FYX FIPMIZMRK somehow that it is real and thinking, as he would if it were
90
The Round
VIEP EFSYX LMW FSSO ERH LMW HIEH [MJI ERH 4VEKYI ERH 8IP Aviv, and as if it were real he feels an empty place in his GLIWX PMOI LI HSIW MR XLI HE]XMQI [LIR LI XLMROW EFSYX LMW FSSO ERH LMW HIEH [MJI ERH 4VEKYI ERH 8IP %ZMZ ERH LI JIIPW FMPI WIITMRK MRXS XLI IQTX] TPEGI [MXL MXW TEVXMGYPEV WEH FMXI ERH LI JIIPW LMW VMFW WMROMRK MRXS XLI IQTX] TPEGI with their particular sad pressure and as if it were real he [MWLIW XLEX LI GSYPH ZSQMX YT XLI IQTX] TPEGI ERH ÂYWL MX E[E] ERH FI HSRI FYX IZIR MR XLI HVIEQ LI GERRSX MRWXIEH LI PSSOW HS[R GEWYEPP] EW LI LEW FIIR PSSOMRK JVSQ WMHI XS WMHI ERH LI WIIW XLEX LMW VMFW LEZI WYRO MR ERH LMW FSH] MW falling away and there is a hole spreading open in his chest NYWX FIPS[ LMW LIEVX FYX LI OIITW [EPOMRK ,I [EPOW HS[R XLI WMHI[EPO SV GSVVMHSV SV FVMHKI SV FIEGL and there are people, especially when the dream is on a FIEGL XLIVI EVI TISTPI ERH LI [SRHIVW [L] XLI] HSR¸X WGVIEQ ERH TSMRX EX XLI LSPI MR LMW GLIWX SV GEPP ER EQFYPERGI SV IZIR EWO LMQ MJ LI¸W EPP VMKLX [LEX¸W LETTIRIH XS LMW VMFGEKI FYX RS SRI XEPOW XS LMQ RS SRI PSSOW EX LMQ no one notices him as he walks and knows the hole is getXMRK FMKKIV MQEKMRIW XLI IRHW SJ LMW VMFW WPMHMRK FIX[IIR LMW SVKERW ERH VYFFMRK EKEMRWX LMW ZIVXIFVEI PSSOW HS[R and sees the hole gaping wider and his unsupported sterRYQ JEPPMRK ERH FIGEYWI LI MW MR E HVIEQ LI GER¸X JIIP FYX still he is aware of its weight settling in his stomach and he [ERXW XS MKRSVI MX FYX LI GER¸X FIGEYWI XLMW MW XLI HVIEQ SJ holes and he knows where the next one opens and knowing pushes all of his thoughts downwards and he has no [E] XS WXST XLIQ XLI RI\X LSPI MW LEW XS FI XLIVI IZIR MJ LI HSIWR¸X WII MX ERH WS LI XIPPW LMQWIPJ .YWX HS MX NYWX PSSO FYX LI HSIWR¸X [ERX XS LI LEXIW MX ERH LEXMRK MX QEOIW LMQ WEHHIV [LMGL QEOIW XLI IQTX] TPEGI XLI ÁVWX LSPI KIX FMK-
91
Max Brod Dreams, Lily Meyer
KIV ERH WS LI KMZIW YT ERH LI PSSOW HS[R ERH XLIVI MX MW the second hole, in the middle of his left thigh, sometimes E PMXXPI XS SRI WMHI SV ERSXLIV FYX EP[E]W LEPJ[E] FIX[IIR his hip and his knee, so deep that his femur shines through, FYX FIGEYWI XLMW MW E HVIEQ MX HSIWR¸X LYVX ERH MX HSIWR¸X FPIIH RSRI SJ XLI LSPIW FPIIHW ERH LI OIITW [EPOMRK 3RGI XLI WIGSRH LSPI MW XLIVI XLI HVIEQ QSZIW JEWXIV XLI new holes open in the same places and in the same order IZIV] XMQI XLI PIJX [VMWX XLI VMKLX IPFS[ XLI QMHHPI SJ LMW FEGO XLI XST SJ LMW LIEH XLI VMKLX GLIIO XLI VMKLX WLMR ERH XLI ÁVWX LSPI XLI IQTX] TPEGI KIXXMRK FMKKIV EPP XLI XMQI ERH LMW VMFW WLMJXMRK ERH LMW GSPPEVFSRI YRQSSVIH JVII ÂSEXMRK ERH LI GER WII XLI FSRIW ERH XIRHSRW MR LMW IPFS[ WPMHMRK FEGO ERH JSVXL FIGEYWI LMW EVQW EVI WXMPP QSZMRK FIGEYWI LI¸W WXMPP [EPOMRK EPSRK XLI FVMHKI SV FIEGL SV GSVVMHSV SV WMHI[EPO ERH QE]FI WSQISRI WQMPIW EX LMQ RS[ SV WE]W 7LEPSQ SV &SOIV XSZ ERH LI [ERXW XS ]IPP 2S 2S FYX LI HSIWR¸X FIGEYWI XLMW MW XLI HVIEQ SJ LSPIW ERH XLI ÁVWX LSPI XLI IQTX] TPEGI MW KIXXMRK FMKKIV EPP XLI XMQI ERH LI HSIWR¸X ORS[ FIGEYWI MR EPP XLI RMKLXW ERH RMKLXW ERH RMKLXW LI¸W LEH XLI HVIEQ SJ LSPIW LI RIZIV SRGI LEW XVMIH XS XEPO FIGEYWI LI HSIWR¸X XLMRO LI GER LI HSIWR¸X know what happens to his lungs or his vocal cords once LI LEW RS GLIWX XS WTIEO SJ FYX NYWX E LSPPS[RIWW LI NYWX nods at the people who say Shalom or Boker tov to him and OIITW SR [EPOMRK [MXL LMW FSRIW I\TSWIH ERH [LMXI XSS [LMXI VIÂIGXMRK XLI [EZIW MJ LI¸W SR E FIEGL SV E FVMHKI SV XLI GEVW¸ FVEOI PMKLXW ERH XYVR WMKREPW MJ LI¸W SR E WMHI[EPO SV XLI ÂYSVIWGIRX GIMPMRK PMKLXW MJ LI¸W MR E GSVVMHSV ERH LI PSSOW EX LMW FSRIW ERH LI XLMROW 7S XLEX¸W [LEX - EQ ERH WSQI RMKLXW LI HSIWR¸X QMRH WIIMRK XLIQ ERH WSQI RMKLXW LI HSIW ERH WSQI RMKLXW LI LEXIW XLIQ FYX [LIR LI LEXIW
92
The Round
XLIQ XLI IQTX] TPEGI KVS[W XLI JEWXIWX ERH LMW FSH] SR LMW XSVWS JEPPW E[E] ERH LMW FSH] SR LMW EVQW JEPPW E[E] ERH LMW FSH] SR LMW PIKW ERH LMW JEGI ERH LMW LIEH ERH LMW FEGO JEPPW E[E] ERH WXMPP LI¸W [EPOMRK ERH XLI HMWGSRRIGXIH FSRIW XLEX SRGI GEKIH LMW SVKERW EVI GPEXXIVMRK EKEMRWX LMW WTMRI ERH EKEMRWX IEGL SXLIV ERH LI HSIWR¸X ORS[ [LIVI LMW PYRKW ERH PMZIV ERH LIEVX ERH KYXW EVI ERH [LEX¸W LETTIRMRK XS XLIQ SV XS LMQ ERH LI GER WII EPP XLI FSRIW SJ LMW PIKW RS[ FYX XLI] EVI WXMPP [EPOMRK LMW PIKW LI MW WXMPP [EPOMRK HS[R XLI WMHI[EPO SV XLI FIEGL SV XLI GSVVMHSV SV XLI FVMHKI ERH TISTPI EVI WQMPMRK RSHHMRK XLI] VIGSKRM^I LMQ LI MW 1E\ &VSH XLI] WE] 7LEPSQ SV &SOIV XSZ ERH LI HSIWR¸X VIWTSRH LI NYWX [EPOW ERH XLI LSPIW KIX FMKKIV ERH LMW FSH] JEPPW E[E]
93
Whim, Maya Mason Chalk Pastel and Ink on Paper, 24” x 18”
Crumbling Statue, Maya Mason Digital Print, 16” x 24”
San Andreas
Sylvia Linsteadt 8LI 'SEWX 1M[SO XLVI[ GSMRW WMPZIV ERH GPEQWLIPP FIEHW MRXS E FMK ÁVI JSV XLI 7ER %RHVIEW *EYPX to keep the man down there asleep, or, EX PIEWX JVSQ QSZMRK LMW ÁRKIVW XSS WYHHIRP] ,I PMIW face down, in the granite, WTIGOPIH [MXL QMGE ERH FMSXMXI Arms outstretched. ;LIR LI [MKKPIW LMW XLYQFW the earth moves. &IJSVI KSPH GSMRW ERH XLI EHSFI QMWWMSRW WQEPP TS\ TEGOIH VMKLX MRXS XLI ÂEO] VIH GPE] FIJSVI VSYKL [SSP LEFMXW ERH WOMRR] PSRK LSVRIH GS[W [LS EXI XLI TIVIRRMEP FYRGLKVEWWIW 'EPMJSVRME FYXXIVGYTW (SYKPEW MVMW VMKLX SYX SJ XLI GSEWXEP TVEMVMIW turning them only green, - HSR¸X ORS[ [LEX XLI 'SEWX 1M[SO XLVI[ MRXS XLIMV ÁVIW for him. Nothing left of those days except QSYRHW SJ HMWGEVHIH GPEQ WLIPP FMVH FSRIW XLEX [IVI SRGI QE]FI E[PW E FSH] FYVMIH RIEV 8SQEPIW &E] [MXL IPO ERXPIVW PEMH carefully across the chest like wings. 1E]FI XLI] XLVI[ LMQ XLMRKW XLEX [IVI LEVH XS GSQI F] VMKLX MRXS XLI ÂEQIW LYQQMRKFMVH ERH GSRHSV JIEXLIVW 4SPMWLIH EFEPSRI WLIPPW KEXLIVIH SJJ XLI IHKIW SJ [EZI FIEXIR VSGOW ;SZIR KMJX FEWOIXW
97
San Andreas, Sylvia Linsteadt
WIHKI FVEGOIR JIVR small as titmouse nests. ;I HSR¸X GEPP ]SY F] ER] WTIGMEP REQIW I\GITX 7ER %RHVIEW *EYPX REQIH EJXIV 7EMRX %RHVI[ E ÁWLIVQER FIJSVI LI [EW E WEMRX %RH TPEXI XIGXSRMGW XLI WGMIRGI SJ XLI IEVXL¸W QSZMRK PMXLSWTLIVI 3YV SJJIVMRKW EVI WIMWQSQIXIVW WXYGO HIIT into your skin like silver surgical instruments. 8LI] VIEH XLI ^MK^EKW SJ ]SYV LIEVX FIEX Your slip-strike rift zone, where North America meets 4EGMÁG 4PEXI MW E TPEGI SJ VYF GVYWL WMHI[E]W GSPPMWMSR -R ÁVI SPH :MGXSVMERW FYMPX [MXL KSPHVYWL GEWL collapsed. A road jumped twenty feet north in Tomales, right next to the fault line. A dock curved into a form like E GVIWGIRX QSSR 8SQ 7QMXL 'SEWX 1M[SO ÁWLIVQER ERH HVIEQIV XLVI[ XLVII HMQIW XS XLI QER HS[R FIPS[ When he died, most of his language died too, slipped into Tomales Bay, down the rift, and into the earth. 8LI] WE] [I [MPP LEZI E &MK 3RI ER] HE] ,S[ SYV LSQIW EVI EPP FYMPX XS FI XSVR MR LEPJ XS GVYQFPI XLIMV WLIIXVSGO ERH MRWYPEXMSR SPH VIH[SSH FSEVHW SRXS SYV LIEHW Sometimes, I am scared. I wish we had something to give the man down there, EPP WTIGOPIH [MXL QMGE ERH FMSXMXI XS OIIT LMQ WXMPP - [MWL [I GEPPIH LMQ F] E REQI XLEX QEHI E PSYH reverent earth-creak when spoken. &YX WMXXMRK F] E [EXIV XERO SR E LMPP XLEX PSSOW SZIV XLI FPYI WXVIEO SJ 8SQEPIW &E]
98
The Round
XLEX REVVS[ FSH] GVIEXIH PMOI E VSYKL VMFFSR F] XLI WPMT WXVMOMRK IEVXL I can see the place where all lost things FIGSQI QSPXIR
99
4SIQ SJ 8VMFYXI
0YGMPPI 'PMJXSR telling our stories the fox came every evening to my door asking for nothing. my fear trapped me inside, hoping to dismiss her FYX WLI WEX XMPP QSVRMRK [EMXMRK at dawn we would, each of us, rise from our haunches, look through the glass then walk away. did she gather her village around her and sing of the hairless moon face, XLI XVIQFPMRK WRSYX XLI MKRSVERX I]IW# child, i tell you now it was not XLI ERMQEP FPSSH M [EW LMHMRK JVSQ it was the poet in her, the poet and XLI XIVVMFPI WXSVMIW WLI GSYPH XIPP
101
Contributors
)PIERSV 0ISRRI &IRRIXX MW E ÁJXIIR ]IEV SPH &VMXMWL TLSXSKVETLIV [LSWI E[EVH [MRRMRK [SVO LEW FIIR featured in galleries and magazines around the world. &IPPI 'YWLMRK MW ER YRHIVKVEHYEXI EX &VS[R 9RMZIVWMX] 7EVEL (EP] MW ER YRHIVKVEHYEXI EX 'SVRIPP 9RMZIVWMX] 6EGLIP )GSRSQ] MW E KVEHYEXI SJ &VS[R 9RMZIVWMX] ,IV [SVO LEW FIIR TYFPMWLIH MR /MRKÁWLIV and The Blue Rider. 1MGLEIP +SSHQER MW ER YRHIVKVEHYEXI EX &VS[R 9RMZIVWMX] )PM^EFIXL ,S[SVX XIEGLIW TSIXV] EX 6SKIV ;MPPMEQW 9RMZIVWMX] ,IV [SVO LEW FIIR TYFPMWLIH MR 0 1EKE^MRI, Thunderclap! Magazine, and the &IWX %QIVMGER 4SIXV] FPSK &PSWWSQ /MVWGLIRFEYQ VIGIMZIH LIV 1% ERH 4L( JVSQ Brown University, where she worked as a research assistant JSV XLI PEXI 4VSJIWWSV %PFIVX 'SSO (V /MVWGLIRFEYQ GSRXVMFYXIH XS IRG]GPSTIHMEW ERH WSYVGIFSSOW XVERWPEXIH RSZIPW WLSVX WXSVMIW ERH TSIQW ERH TYFPMWLIH WGLSPEVP] EVXMGPIW MR -XEPMER %QIVMGER ERH .I[MWL %QIVMGER NSYVREPW ,IV XVERWPEXMSRW LEZI FIIR TYFPMWLIH MR Chelsea 66, Journal of Italian Translation, Modernism, and New Italian Women. Lucy Kissel is an undergraduate at Brown University. Sylvia Linsteadt is a graduate of Brown University. She is a JSYRHIV SJ 8LI 6SYRH
Contributors
1E]E 1EWSR MW ER YRHIVKVEHYEXI EX &VS[R 9RMZIVWMX] )PM^EFIXL 1IX^KIV MW E KVEHYEXI SJ &VS[R 9RMZIVWMX] 7LI MW E JSYRHIV SJ 8LI 6SYRH 0MP] 1I]IV MW ER YRHIVKVEHYEXI EX &VS[R 9RMZIVWMX] 1EHIPIMRI 3¸2IMPP MW ER YRHIVKVEHYEXI EX &VS[R 9RMZIVWMX] /IZMR 4MVIW MW ER YRHIVKVEHYEXI EX &VS[R 9RMZIVWMX] Bridget Sauer is an undergraduate at Brown University. 1SI^ 7YVERM PMZIW MR *PSVIRGI [VMXMRK TSIXV] WLSVX ÁGXMSR ERH FSSO VIZMI[W ,MW WIGSRH GSPPIGXMSR SJ TSIXV] Floating 0MJI [MPP FI TYFPMWLIH MR 1EKKMI 8SFMR MW ER EVXMWX XIEGLIV ERH GSQQYMRX] SVKERM^IV 3VMRKMREPP] JVSQ 3QELE 2IFVEWOE WLI LEW FIIR PMZMRK in Brooklyn, New York for the past twenty years. She has I\LMFMXIH LIV [SVO MR 1I\MGS -XEP] ERH XLVSYKLSYX XLI United States. .YWXMR ;]QIV MW ER YRHIVKVEHYEXI EX ,EVZEVH 9RMZIVWMX] ,MW [SVO LEW FIIR TYFPMWLIH MR Gamut Magazine, The Harvard Advocate, Off the Coast, and Tuesday Magazine. .IWWMGE =SYRK XIEGLIW )RKPMWL EX XLI 9RMZIVWMX] SJ 1MGLMKER [LIVI WLI VIGIMZIH LIV 1*% ,IV 4YWLGEVX 4VM^I RSQMREXIH [SVO LEW FIIR TYFPMWLIH MR XLI Bellingham Review, Copper Nickel, and Versal.
Editorial Staff
4VSWI )HMXSVW %HEQ (EZMW Sylvia Linsteadt .SVHER 8E]PSV
4SIXV] )HMXSVW Lucy Kissel )PM^EFIXL 1IX^KIV /IZMR 4MVIW
Design Editors Lucy Kissel /IZMR 4MVIW 7]PZME 8SQE]OS 4IXIVW
Cover Design 1EKKMI 8SFMR Staff 1MGLEIP +SSHQER 7IXL /PIMRWGLQMHX .SREXLER 7XSVGL 7]PZME 8SQE]OS 4IXIVW /EXME >SVMGL
Note from the Editors
8LERO ]SY JSV VIEHMRK XLI ÁJXL MWWYI SJ The Round. The Round GSRWMHIVW PMXIVEV] ERH ZMWYEP EVX WYFQMWWMSRW SJ ER] KIRVI ERH WSYVGI XLVSYKL IPIGXVSRMG QEMP 4PIEWI HMVIGX all such work for consideration, as well as any questions, GSQQIRXW SV WYKKIWXMSRW XS
8LI6SYRH1EKE^MRI$KQEMP GSQ Sincerely, The Editors