ISIS - Summer 2014

SUMMER 2014

FREE

COCKTAILS AND CANVAS A BRUSH PLUS DRINKS EQUALS A NIGHT OF FUN AND CREATIVITY

NEONS GO ALL OUT AND GLOW WITH BRIGHT COLORS

g n i l z er Sizm m u S

MAKE IT YOUR HOTTEST SEASON YET

INSIDE

HOME, CAREER, FITNESS, BEAUTY

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

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There’s no need to wear the design of someone else when you can flaunt your very own Using our innovative design system, you help create your own jewelry masterpiece and we custom make it just for you

Our Exper ert In Store Designer In-Store Desig “More Than Just A Jewelry Store” Merchants Walk, Carterville

985-8331 Hours: Mon.-Fri. 9-6, Sat. 9-5 2

yjeweler.com |

summer 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

‌ Publication of A The Southern Illinoisan A Lee Enterprises Company PUBLISHER John Pfeiffer EDITOR Cara Recine ART & DESIGN Kathryn Sesser ADVERTISING Lacey Thompson EDITORIAL CONTRIBUTORS Chanda Green Rana Hodge Angela Holmes-Young Beth Michaels Cara Recine Adam Testa Lacey Thompson COPY EDITING Tom English Mary Thomas Layton Adam Testa ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Kelly Caudill Nora Chambliss Brian Flath Stephanie Meyer Alisha Shipp Lacey Thompson Levi Wampler SALES ASSISTANTS Rose Baffi THE SOUTHERN ILLINOISAN 710 N. Illinois Ave. Carbondale, IL 62901 www.thesouthern.com CONTACT US! EDITORIAL Cara Recine, Editor 618-351-5075 cara.recine@thesouthern.com ADVERTISING Lacey Thompson Niche Advertising Manager 618-351-5001 lacey.thompson@thesouthern.com All contents copyright 2014 by The Southern Illinoisan. All rights reserved.

Reproduction or use in whole or in part of the editorial or photo, without the prior written permission of the publisher, is strictly prohibited. ISIS is not responsible for unsolicited manuscripts, photographs or artwork. Submissions will not be returned unless accompanied by a self-addressed, stamped envelope.

The heat of desire Feeling the power of heat

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he rays of the sun poured down on the sands of ancient Egypt, creating a furnace of heat across the land. But the people inhabiting the land could not rest; their lives had to continue despite the fiery conditions.

The Egyptians learned not only to deal with the heat, but to thrive in it. The weather became part of their life, legend and lore. More than just their bodies and their environment felt the heat; their gods and goddesses felt it, too.

Goddess Isis often found herself overcome with heat — not just the heat of the sun, but also the heat of desire, passion and sensuality.

She was a symbol of power, magic, motherhood and fertility, but she, like the other goddesses of ancient times, also was a symbol of eroticism, sexuality and womanhood.

Statues of the goddess were created depicting her nude, aside from a showgirl-style headdress. Songs and spells were written in her name, spoken or sung by loving or lusting individuals praying for help in landing their heart’s deepest desire.

Whether a believer in the mythological and spiritual or not, women today can call on Isis. When looking to turn up the heat of your romantic relationship, turn back time to ancient Egypt and learn from Isis, one of history’s best women at harnessing the fire of love and passion and turning it into a desire fulfilled.

WHY ISIS? One reason we chose the name ISIS is because of the Southern Illinois connection to all things Egyptian. Hundreds of years ago, when northern Illinoisans suffered poor grain harvests, they traveled here to buy what they needed, just like the ancients traveled to Egypt for sustenance.

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

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At the Cover Shoot

Credits STYLISTS:

Lacey Thompson CLOTHING and ACCESSORIES: WHO: Karissa Killian, Carbondale WHAT: ISIS Summer cover shoot WHERE: Photography

by Lori studio, Marion WHEN: Monday, June 23, 2014

Eccentrics Boutique, Carterville HAIR and MAKEUP: Danielle Smith (hair) and Ashli Burford (makeup) for Clique Hair Design, Marion PHOTOGRAPHY: Lori Baysinger, Photography by Lori

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SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

23 Providers. 19 Locations.

One Focus: YOU. Michael Schifano, D.O.

Scott Joyner, D.O.

Elisabeth Beyer Nolen, M.D.

Jamie Plett, M.D.

Douglas Combs, M.D.

Amanda Carroll, D.O.

Amber Watters, M.D. (Coming Fall 2014)

Michael (Mick) Covlin, M.D.

Kaci Durbin, M.D.

Emily Boyd, M.D.

David Walters, M.D.

Debra Carson, D.O.

Kimberly Carter, D.O.

April Parker, M.D.

Todd Albright, M.D.

Tressie Landreth, C.N.M.

Sylvia Obernuefemann, C.N.M.

Anja Schifano, C.N.M.

Shalisa Henson, W.H.N.P.

Donna Walters, W.H.N.P.

Trina Bellamy, W.H.N.P.

Sarah Ford, F.N.P.

Ashley Wittler, W.H.N.P.

Taking care of women and their babies in the heartland 1-877-ILOBGYN (456-2496)

www.ILOBGYN.com Facebook.com/HeartlandWomensHealthcare

Anna • Belleville • Benton • Carbondale • Centralia • Fairfield • Flora Harrisburg • Herrin • Marion • McLeansboro • Metropolis • Mt. Vernon Nashville • O’Fallon • Pinckneyville • Salem • Sparta • Waterloo

summer 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

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table of contents

Follow us @myisismag

UP FRONT To the Reader Behind the Scenes Follow Us Meet Our Model

1 2 4 6

FASHION Pop with Neons StreetStyle Below the Belt

MONEY Thrift-Shopping Tips

16

28

Facial Facts The Bob Is Back

22

Green Hygiene Essential Oils

25

Make it Sexy Again

34 37

Do It, Salsa Style

40

FAMILY New to Parenting?

Fighting?

42

ONLINE Blogs We Love

FALL 2013

38

FITNESS 30 32

WELLNESS

HOME A Coat of Creativity

COUPLES

BEAUTY 18 20

GIRLFRIENDS Cocktails and Canvas

EAT Bring on the Heat

CAREER Profile: Katherine Accettura Be a Leader

38

8 12 14

44

HAVE IT DELIVERED!

BE THE LIFE OF THE PARTY SHINE YOUR BRIGHTEST WITHOUT KILLING YOUR REPUTATION

HOW TO WEAR THIS FALL’S PALETTE YES, YOU CAN ROCK RED

DRESS YOURSELF IN

FROM YOUR HEAD TO TOES, WORK IT!

Free 1

GET 8 ISSUES FOR $19.95 GET 4 ISSUES FOR $12.95 NAME ____________________________________ ADDRESS _________________________________ CITY _________________ STATE _____ ZIP ______ PHONE ___________________________________ EMAIL_____________________________________

CLIP OUT THIS CARD AND MAIL PAYMENT TO: ISIS MAGAZINE, PO BOX 2108, CARBONDALE, IL 62901

FOR ADDITIONAL INFORMATION OR TO PLACE YOUR ORDER, CALL 618-351-5035.

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SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

NOW INTRODUCING

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CoSMeTiCS Pearl™ Titan For Total 3D Photo rejuvenation Laser Hair removal Laser Facial/Leg Vein Treatment Vein Sclerotherapy Laser Skin rejuvenation Age Spot removal Chemical Peels Microdermabrasion Botox Dermal Filler Skin Care Products Facials Jane iredale Mineral Makeup

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summer 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

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ISIS models

Karissa

K

‘30 is going to be a great age’

arissa was born and raised in Southern Illinois. Although many miles from large cities, there were many opportunities in the arts to be enjoyed. Karissa, who studied piano and violin for 10 years, attended Southern Illinois University. In 2008, she started a photography business, Kaptured By Karissa Photography. She also worked in health care for nine years in the nursing field with a specialization in geriatrics.

“I love my elderly patients and getting to know them and their families,” Karissa says. “I always tried to treat my patients and their families as if they were members of my own.” She recently changed careers, accepting a position as office manager at a local law firm.

For this article, Karissa was questioned by her mother, Dr. Jeannie Killian, who is an academic adviser and instructor at SIU, where she has worked for 30 years.

Dr. K: Why are you looking at me like that?

Karissa: Because you’re supposed to be asking me questions.

Dr. K: So, we’re starting this interview now. Are you going to keep texting your friends while I ask you questions?

Karissa: Mom, stop. (Weird and awkward glances at each other.)

Dr. K: What is the best part of being 30?

Karissa: I’m setting new career goals. I know what I want, and don’t want, in life and relationships. What were you doing when you were 30?

Dr. K: I thought they said I got to ask the questions?

Karissa: Mom …

Dr. K: When I was 30, I had an 11-yearold and a 1-year-old. I decided that I was going to finish college.

Karissa: Which degree did you go back to get?

Dr. K: All of them!

Karissa: What!?

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SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

Dr. K: After you were born, I went back to SIU and received three degrees. This all happened after I turned 30.

Karissa: I guess I didn’t realize that’s how old you were and with two kids. Wow, Mom. Dr. K: I tell all my students, “You are the only person who can decide your education and career path. No one can stop you from achieving your goals, but you.”

Karissa: Hmm. Now I feel even better about moving forward and changing careers.

I feel like young women can feel a lot of pressure to fit a certain image. I think it’s best to go for what you feel is right for your life and make changes for the better. I don’t think your age should determine what you can do. Thanks for doing this with me, Mom. Dr. K: You’re welcome. So, does this magazine give us a gift card for dinner, or how does this work?

Karissa: OMG, Mom, you’ve just ruined it. Now we have to start over.

Killian “I TURNED 30 IN APRIL AND THOUGHT TO MYSELF, ‘WHAT’S NEXT?’ THERE IS SO MUCH I WANT TO DO AND EXPERIENCE, AND THIS IS GOING TO BE A GREAT AGE.”

Karissa K il and her lian mo Jeannie. m, T two hav he e extraord an in mom-da ary ugh relationsh ter ip.

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ISIS fashion

N E O N 8

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Cover model Karissa Killian wears a dress from Eccentrics Boutique in Carterville

Go all out and glow with bright colors

W

ant to add a little zing to your look? Summer is the perfect time to shake it up and break your style habits — even if you’re not headed to an exotic location.

According to Pantone Color Institute, “The season’s hot colors are inspired by a mixture of blooming flowers, travels abroad and strong, confident women.” Unusual colors can be worn in small doses or all over. Isis talked to local fashion expert Beth Moore of Gypsy Rose Boutique in Harrisburg to bring you the very best tactics for hitting this trend.

HIGH CONTRAST “I love pairing neon with black,” Beth said. When you wear bright colors against stark black, the contrast that is created really helps your neon pop, even making it appear brighter. You might notice that plenty of colorful dresses, skirts and shirts are made with black included, such as a black-trimmed zipper. Orange and black can be harder to pair without being reminiscent of Halloween. Instead, try this hue with navy blue.

Fashion Statement Cluster Necklace, $16.99, Target

NOT YOUR MAMA’S KHAKIS Blasé basics like khaki capris or jean skirts get a boost of boldness when worn with something eyecatching. You can accessorize these outfits more easily with colorful jewelry or bright sandals, because that colorless item in your outfit will help to neutralize everything else.

Vince Camuto Itella Sandals, $59.99, Dillard’s

BRIGHT LIGHTS “These bold colors look amazing with our summer tans,” Beth said, and the pop of color is also beautiful and breathtaking against naturally darktoned or black skin. But don’t let a porcelain complexion scare you off from this trend; your soft color will still shine.

— Rana Hodge

City Studios Juniors’ Strapless Printed Maxi Dress, $39, Macy’s

Neon Scarf, $12, Gypsy Moon, Harrisburg

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ISIS fashion Van’s neon pink tennies, $44.95, Journeys

Hot Pink Top, $46, Gypsy Moon, Harrisburg

Women’s Fit and Flare Ponte-Tank Dress, $29.94, Old Navy

Pleated long dress, $57, Eccentrics, Carterville

Bluebird Apparel, $15, Dayshift, Carbondale

Bluebird Apparel, $15, Dayshift, Carbondale

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SUMMER 2014

Summer Days at

Nail Color Mirabella, $27, Chanel

Color Elixer Hibiscus Haven, $8.99, Maybelline New York

MAKING FACES Customeyes Party Pops Eyeshadow Kit, $8.99, Revlon

To rock bright eyes, lips or nails, all you really need is some imagination.

Summer tends to put us in the mood for adventure, so channel that energy toward your makeup bag, and you might find your new favorite look!

Neon Nail Polish, $7, American Apparel.com

Color Burst Lip Color in Tutti Frutti, $9, Revlon

Clothing • Jewelry Accessories • Fine art Home Goods • Kids Bath & body

101 W. Monroe, Carbondale, IL

618.529.DAYS Tues-Sat: 10am-6pm

ISIS fashion

One of the best things about fashion is rockin’ fashion that’s all your own, and these ladies do it with, well, style!

STREET

e l y St

DANNI WOJCIK, CARBONDALE Danni is a prep chef and counter girl at Fat Patties in Carbondale, and she also holds down a job with the Department of Human Services.

SKIRT: H&M VEST: NY and Co. TANK TOP: Forever 21

WANT TO BE FEATURED?: SHOW OFF YOUR STYLE AND EMAIL YOUR FAVORITE LOOK TO LACEY.THOMPSON@THESOUTHERN.COM.

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SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

JESSICA PERADOTTO, MURPHYSBORO Jessica studies radiological sciences at SIU and is an X-ray technician at Orthopedic Institute of Southern Illinois in Herrin. She was rocking a complete look, but we loved this photo of her.

SHORTS: American Eagle BANDO: Pac Sun SHIRT: Thrift shop

SHANIKA RICE, CARBONDALE

PH OT OS BY NI CO LE HE ST ER

This Chicago native is a human nutrition and dietetics major at SIU. HAT AND JEANS: Old Navy JACKET: Forever 21

RYLIE BRUCE, CARBONDALE Rylie is a radio-TV and journalism major at SIU. SKIRT: Forever 21 SHIRT: Kohl’s

w o l e B the t l e B

ISIS fashion

Patterned pants are sashaying onto the summer fashion scene

H

ave you tried on a pair of one of this season’s hottest fashion trends? If you are shaking your head, consider this: They’re easier to wear than you might think. If you’ve already taken the leap and purchased summer’s freshest wardrobe item, read on for ideas on how to style it.

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SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

Floral Pants, $298, J Crew

Cezanne, $30, Gypsy Moon, Harrisburg

THE BASICS Perhaps the easiest way to style patterned bottoms is to wear them with solid colors on top and on your feet. “Let the pants make the statement,” said Beth Moore of Gypsy Rose Boutique in Harrisburg.

This no-fuss approach is great for any occasion, and often a black or white top will both work with the same pair of pants. A solid button-up works for the office, while a cami keeps it casual on the weekends.

Because these pants are easy to dress up, you can wear a more formal, flirty top for a night out or brunch on the wine trail.

MIX IT UP When worn just right, patterns can be paired with other patterns for a fresh, modern look. You might not think florals and stripes go together, but this combination is actually very popular in the fashion world.

Beth told Isis that she likes to keep the wisdom of Dr. Seuss in mind when it comes to fashion: “Why fit in when you were born to stand out?” This trend is a great way to have fun with your clothes, so let loose and try something new!

Mossimo Wide-Leg Pants, $24.99, Target

Pixie Printed Skinny Pants, $34.94, Old Navy

— Rana Hodge

Bar II Printed Pants, $49.99, Macy’s SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

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ISIS money

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Cedar cabin lodging with all the comforts of home, featuring a pavilion perfect for family reunions.

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The American Discovery Trail, and 1/3 mile from the River to River Trail in the www.illinoisozarks.com of Southern Illinois.

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THRIFT SHOPPING WITH A STRATEGY

‌W

hen shopping at thrift stores, you have to be willing to forage for the good stuff. Here are more tips from the experts at Goodwill Industries: DIG DEEP. You have to search through racks, squat to see what’s on lower shelves, lift and move things, and otherwise take an active approach to seeking out hidden treasures.

textures, colors or prints than styles.

Look for those first.

BE WILLING TO CHANGE THINGS. A sewing machine can transform an outdated style or fix a poor fit. An old curtain can supply the fabric to cover a lampshade. Try to see things for their potential, not their present state.

SHOP OFF-SEASON. People usually donate clothing, holiday decorations and other items at the end of a season, so that’s a good time to shop.

FOCUS. Concentrate on finding only two or three items you really like.

DON’T BE AFRAID. The idea of painting a hutch or taking in a skirt might seem daunting if you’ve never done it before, but thrift store finds are a low-risk, lowcost place to start building your skills.

DEVELOP AN EYE. When you’re shopping for clothes, it’s easier to spot

SHOP OFTEN. Thrift store merchandise changes frequently, even daily.

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Appointments: 618‐457‐0465

Ms. Shopinski joins Dr. Don Bishop and Dr. Woo Sohn, OB‐GYNs

www.shsdc.org

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

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ISIS careers

Happy Solez

Go to this story online at www. thesouthern. com/isis for links to Katherine.

BY CHANDA GREEN

Katherine Accettura’s creative organic clothing line is turning heads and generating followers

S

ome of us are lucky enough to discover our creativity early.

We draw or write, sing or play an instrument, cook or make crafts, looking for what works for us. Maybe the first few attempts aren’t entirely successful, but there’s a feeling in the doing that excites us.

Katherine Accettura knew from a very young age

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that she was creative and passionate about pursuing that creativity. One of the mediums that inspired her was fabric, and she was supported in that pursuit by a couple of very important women in her life — her mother and grandmother.

“I have been sewing since I was about 13 years old, when my grandmother (Pat Accettura) gave me my first sewing machine,” she said. “I still use techniques that she

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

showed me every time I sew.

“And my mother (Betsy Tracy), who has always been very creative, loves helping me with sewing and crafting projects. When I began sewing, she would help me cut and sew baby quilts, which I believe helped me ultimately focus on creating unique items for little ones.

“I love sewing because I enjoy making things with my hands. I really love the feeling

BOBBY SAMAT PHOTOGRAPHY

Katherine shows off her organic tote bags while visiting Bald Knob Cross in Alto Pass.

Happy Solez Eco-Cloths are made from 100 percent cotton and are completely washable.

They come in packages of two, and make great cloths for babies but also make great facial cloths, duster cloths and scrubbers for dishes.

of cottons and linens, and I really like making sure every stitch is straight and perfect and won’t unravel. I also love making people smile when they see my work.”

Katherine grew up in Springfield. She moved to Carbondale in 2006 to attend SIU, where she earned her bachelor’s degree in communication design and master’s in professional media/media management.

She focused a portion of her master’s final project on managing her own business, Happy Solez.

“I created the name for my business, Happy Solez, because of my most popular item, my baby booties,” she said. “The soles or ‘Solez’ of the little shoes inspired the name, and the fact that babies often smile when they wear my baby booties.”

If you haven’t guessed, Katherine’s business is designing and sewing unique items for babies, children and women. She describes it as “one girl sewing her way through Southern Illinois.” You can find Happy Solez products at The Neighborhood Co-op in Carbondale, The Foundrie in Chesterfield Mall near St. Louis and at Katherine’s Etsy shop online at etsy.com/ shop/HappySolez.

Those products, she said, include baby booties “lined with recycled plastic bottle material,” zipper pouches, appliqué onesies, eco-cloths, burp cloths, tote bags and festival flower crowns “made out of silk flowers and florist wire — no hot glue.” All of her beautiful things are created

from organic, eco-friendly and sustainable materials.

“I love being a part of The Neighborhood Co-op here in Carbondale, because they value supporting local businesses, and the company and their shoppers are incredibly progressive and inspiring,” she said.

“I believe in using organic, eco-friendly and sustainable fabrics — allnatural cotton or linen, reclaimed or vintage — because they are generally made with more care and consciousness, and I take care to create hardly any waste while constructing these items. My products are washable, created with high quality materials, sewn well, and will last a very long time.”

Of course, being the creative soul that she is, Katherine’s creations aren’t entirely limited to clothing and accessories. She also does graphic design and social media marketing. She has more than 1 million followers on Pinterest at pinterest.com/ happysolez/pins/, where she features current and upcoming fashion trends, jewelry and accessories, DIY and craft projects and, as she puts it, “lots and lots of recipes, sewing projects, photography inspirations and much more.”

Katherine’s also active on Twitter, and she writes a fashion blog, Lily The Wandering Gypsy.

“My blog is named after one of our ‘children,’ Cabbie, a Chocolate Lab, and Lily, an American Staffordshire terrier,” she said. “Our dogs are definitely our children.”

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ISIS careers

6THINGS YOU DO RIGHT NOW TO BECOME A LEADER

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SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

BY ANGELA HOLMES-YOUNG

‌W

hat does it take to be a good leader?

It might be easier than you think.

Take a moment to reflect on what you appreciate in a boss.

Determine the traits you value above all else, and find ways to emulate those exact characteristics.

Leaders can come in the form of bosses, supervisors and even mentors. You might even be an informal leader without knowing it. Remember this as you navigate your way through the workplace.

People may not remember what you say, but they will most likely remember what you do.

Follow these guidelines and begin to act like a leader. You can do these things today, whether or not you are in an actual management position.

1

Set goals. Goalsetting will give you something to work toward, and it is good for both your professional and personal life. If goal-setting seems overwhelming, start with a “big picture” goal. Make a list of things you want to accomplish by the end of the year. Make this list for both work and home.

2 3

.Make a plan. Now that you have your goals, list the steps that will get you there. This is your plan.

Talk. Talk to others around you. Do not make these goals and plans in a vacuum. Understand your situation and the limits that you may have.

4

Listen. Listen to the advice you are given. Notice that I did not say that you have to take all of the advice you are given.

You should at least listen though. Some will be valuable and some will not.

5 6

Be seen and not just heard. Get out and live, network and mingle. Get involved in your community.

Set the example.

Be the professional.

ANGELA HOLMES-YOUNG is the author of “Bring It On, The Aspiring Professional’s Guide to Getting a Leg Up on the Competition.” Her book is available at Bookworm in Carbondale and online at amazon.com and barnesandnoble.com. Angela is also the corporate recruiter for National Recruiting Experts. ‌ She can be reached at ang_holmes@yahoo.com or @A_Holmes_Young.

ISIS girlfriends

CO

Mother and daughter Lea Ann and Kate Stone show off paintings they did at a Paint & PARTY! event at the Wild Trillium in Benton.

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SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

OCKTAILS and canvas A brush plus drinks equals a night of fun and creativity

the side, well, what’s not to like?

At The Wild Trillium, aint, drink and participants pay $35 for a be merry! That’s three-hour party. Sharon the idea behind provides the materials and the growing the instructor, and the girls national trend bring their own beverages of learn-to-paint and snacks and usually a classes that encourage carload of friends. novice artists to create a “The subject of the piece of art while enjoying evening’s artwork is drawn a drink and the company out in advance, so you don’t of like-minded people. have to know the first thing Murphysboro artist and instructor There are Paint and about drawing or painting Rachel Malcolm Ensor works on Pour classes in Houston, to participate,” said Sharon, a painting during a wine-andpainting event at Walker’s Bluff in Wine and Canvas classes who also hosts private Carterville. in Orlando and Bottle parties at her Benton shop. and Bodega events in At Walker’s Bluff, the Chicago. Local offerings include Merlot cost is the same — $35 for one two-hour class and a Masterpiece events at Walker’s Bluff on a Sunday afternoon. That covers materials; in Carterville and Paint & PARTY! classes at instruction by Rachel Malcolm Ensor, director The Wild Trillium gift shop on the square in of Murphysboro School of Art; and one glass Benton. And Blue Sky Vineyard in Makanda of wine with some cheese and crackers. is in the planning stages of hosting its own “We had our first event this spring, and Wine & Painting event. the third one in June,” Chelsea said. “It’s So, what’s with all the cocktails mostly women, who come in groups of two or and canvas? three, but men are welcome, too. It’s become It’s simple, said Sharon Webb Hewitt, so popular that we’re going to make it a owner of The Wild Trillium. “It’s so much fun!” monthly thing.”

“It’s awesome, a great time,” echoed “When we opened this shop more than Chelsea Petty, marketing director at a year ago, we wanted to provide an outlet Walker’s Bluff. for local artists,” Sharon said of the events at Turns out a lot of women have always The Wild Trillium. “When people walk in our wanted to paint, but didn’t want to invest the door, they see a large selection of items made time or money in formal classes or were just by local artists and craftsmen, and when they too intimidated. But if a group of girls gets come to our Paint & PARTY! classes, we feel together just to relax and have a good time like we’re helping to create a whole new crop for a few hours, with a little art instruction on of local artists!”

BY CHANDA GREEN

P

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

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ISIS home

HOW TO

UPDATE

FURNITURE FOR PROJECT, TURN TO PAGE 26

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25

ISIS home

MAKE OLD FURNITURE, ACCESSORIES POP WITH A

FRESH COAT OF

CREATIVITY

T

une in to any of the do-ityourself shows on HGTV or flip through any one of a dozen home décor magazines, and you can’t help but notice one of the current hot trends: furniture painted in bright, bold pops of color. Finally, you know what to do with that old, scratched-up dresser you got for a steal a few Saturdays ago at a local garage sale.

“These projects have become quite popular. You’ll see old furniture repurposed or just brightened up with colors such as bright teals and light blues. Put one of those accent pieces in an otherwise neutral room, and it really stands out, in a good way,” said David Graham, manager of Sherwin Williams east location in Carbondale..

“More people are coming into the shop, asking about this kind of project,” he said, “and it’s something that most people can do quite easily.”

The best place to pick up an interesting piece for this kind of project, he said, is at a yard sale or flea market.

And, your project doesn’t have to be limited to furniture either.

“I bought an old steel milk jug a few years ago and painted it bright red to use as a table on my front porch,” David said. “And my dad found an old trunk at a yard sale for $5 that my wife cleaned up and painted in an Americana theme.

We had an offer to buy that piece for $125, but my wife didn’t want to part with it.”

— Chanda Green

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HOW TO

STEP 1: Remove any knobs, hinges or decorative hardware.

STEP 2: Lightly sand the piece or at least the part of the piece you want to paint. Clean off any residue from sanding.

STEP 3: Prime the piece before painting. You can spray smaller pieces, but you’ll want to brush or roll on the primer on larger areas. “Use gray primer,” said David Graham, manager of Sherwin Williams east location in Carbondale. “And use oil-based or latex paint, because that will mean fewer coats of the brighter colors, which are a little harder to get to cover.”

STEP 4: Prepare to paint.

“Pick a shinier paint, satin or semi-gloss, with a glossy sheen, because it will be more durable,” David said.

Even so, you’ll want to apply two or three coats of your color, letting it dry between coats, according to paint instructions.

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27

ISIS eat

WANT TO FEEL THE HEAT? Spice up your Mexican dishes

E

very year, the big kahuna of the spice world, McCormick BEAT THE HEAT & Co., predicts the top OF HOT PEPPERS flavors and food trends Many hot peppers, for the coming year. An including the serrano, explosion of Mexican flavors are hot enough to around the globe. easily irritate the skin Some of the more common and wellon the hands, and it known spices used regularly in Mexican can be excruciating dishes include oregano, cumin and chili if their juice comes powder. Mexican oregano, as opposed into contact with to the more common (and more Italian) eyes. Many cooks Mediterranean oregano, gives dishes a wear thin, disposable rich, earthy flavor. Oregano pairs well gloves while working with tomato-based dishes. with hot peppers.

Ancho chile powder is almost And, remember, don’t sweet and has rich, dried-fruit flavors. touch your face or Chipotle chile powder is made from skin until the gloves jalapeno peppers that have been dried are removed! and smoked.

Cocoa is also used in many Mexican dishes to add a very rich, warm flavor.

Spices combined with small amounts of cocoa and peanut butter are used to make Mole, a thick sauce often served over chicken.

The recipe included here uses another hot pepper commonly found in Mexican dishes — the seranno, said to be about five times hotter than the jalapeno pepper, and that’s hot.

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SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

MANGO SALSA 1 cup ripe seeded tomatoes, coarsely chopped 1 cup mango, diced ½ cup finely diced cilantro ½ cup red onion, finely diced 1 teaspoon garlic powder ½ teaspoon salt ½ teaspoon black pepper One serrano chili, seeded and veins removed, finely diced Mix all ingredients and refrigerate overnight to enhance flavors. Serve with tortilla chips.

ISIS beauty

BENEFITS OF A FACIAL • Improves skin’s appearance and texture • Helps with skin problems • Reverses the effects of sun damage • Tightens up and firms the skin, delaying aging

Let’s face it A facial – given by a licensed aesthetician – can be one of the best things you can do for yourself and your skin

BY CARA RECINE

A

facial is one of the best ways to keep your skin looking healthy and young.

And, if you’ve never had one, you’re in for an additional treat. A good facial not only cleans, exfoliates and nourishes the skin; it’s one of the most relaxing spa treatments

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available. That’s because any good facial includes a stimulating facial massage and more.

“While the client is resting during the facial mask, I give a shoulder and décolletage massage, as well as the arms and hands,” explained Sheri Carpenter, a licensed aesthetician with Green Door Spa in Mount Vernon. “After the mask comes off, we apply

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

a very soft, warm towel. It’s very relaxing.”

Sheri, who has been performing facials for 23 years and has continued her education all the while, said that if you don’t know what to expect, it might be a little intimidating.

With help from Sheri and Anitra Brown, spa expert for About. com, we’ve put together a primer on how the typical professional facial should go.

SENSITIVE SKIN A PROBLEM? NOT TO WORRY. THERE ARE PRODUCTS AVAILABLE THAT ARE MADE JUST FOR YOU. ‘WE USE A TREATMENT THAT CONTAINS OATMEAL WITH PAPAYA AND FRUIT ENZYMES,’ SAID SHERI CARPENTER AT GREEN DOOR SPA IN MOUNT VERNON. ‘THE OATMEAL SOOTHES THE SKIN AFTER A FACIAL. ’

THE PROCESS‌ CONSULTATION: A facial should begin with a consultation. The aesthetician will have you fill out a form with questions about your skin concerns, your diet, how much water you drink, drugs and supplements you take and products you use. If your facial experience doesn’t begin with this kind of thorough consultation, you can change your mind – and you should. If you’ve had a facial experience that didn’t go so well, be sure to tell your pro about it.

“We take lots of information, so we can do exactly what it right for the client,” Sheri said.

“We also try to advise our clients about nutrition. Skin is one of the largest organs of the body; what you put in comes out in your skin.”

CLEANSING: After wrapping your hair with a towel

or headband, the aesthetician begins a facial with a thorough cleansing, using cotton pads, aesthetician wipes or sponges.

SKIN ANALYSIS: The aesthetician covers your eyes and looks at your skin through a brightly lit magnifying lamp. He or she is determining your basic skin type (dry, oily, combination, sensitive or normal) and skin conditions (acne, blackheads, whiteheads, aging, sundamage, dehydration, etc.)

The aesthetician then chooses the appropriate products and treatments and consults with you about what he or she sees and recommends.

STEAM: Most facials use a machine that directs a thin vapor of warm steam to your face. This is relaxing and helps softens up any blackheads and whiteheads to be extracted. If you have very sensitive skin, the aesthetician may not use steam.

EXFOLIATION: Exfoliants have a gritty texture that rubs away the surface dead skin cells. This type of exfoliation usually happens during the steam. Chemical exfoliation uses enzymes and acids to loosen the bond between skin cells. A gentle enzyme treatment can be done during the steam. Stronger chemical peels, which vary in intensity, can be a stand-alone treatment or part of the facial.

EXTRACTIONS: This is the removal of blackheads or whiteheads — if you need it and want it. Extractions can be uncomfortable, especially on thin or reddish skin. If you don’t

want this portion of the facial, you can skip it entirely.

FACIAL MASSAGE: Your aesthetician will massage your face and neck to relax you and stimulate your skin and facial muscles.

MASK: The aesthetician will apply a facial mask targeted to your skin type and its condition. During the facial, the aesthetician should stay in the room and give you a scalp massage or some other service.

This is when Sheri massages the shoulders, arms and hands; she won’t leave you alone. If you have a facialist who does, don’t go back.

FINAL APPLICATION: You’ll receive a final application of toner, serums and moisturizer.

HOW OFTEN SHOULD I GET A FACIAL?‌ “Usually once a month is a good routine,” Sheri said, unless you’re undergoing special treatment, like a peel.

And once a month is enough, if you’re caring for your skin at home between facials. If you can’t manage it monthly, try to have a facial at least four times a year as the seasons change, or more often if you are trying to clear up acne or another skin problem. But beware: You can overdo it, especially if you have sensitive skin.

COSTS‌ Most professional facials run between $50 and $80, but you’re worth it, right?

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ISIS beauty BOB’S REBELLIOUS HISTORY ‌ hen the bob first appeared W in the late 1910s and early 1920s, it challenged the era’s notions of femininity.

“To have long hair was to signal your delicacy, your sexuality, and your elegance and refinement — all of the traditional attributes associated with femininity at the time,” said Anya Kurennaya, an adjunct faculty member at Parsons The New School for Design in New York. “Cutting one’s hair meant rejecting that traditional femininity, because it decreased the visible difference between men’s and women’s hairstyles.”

And the changes in women’s lives have changed their reasons for adopting short hair. Depending on whom you ask, practicality can trump liberation.

“A young woman’s decision to shear her locks and adopt a rebellious choppy bob makes a different statement than a mother’s decision to part with her long hair to cut down on styling and maintenance times,” Kurennaya says.

In other words, today’s modified bob reflects today’s more complicated times.

And, yet, some of those traditional notions the bob fought against linger.

In the early part of the 20th century, women who chose the bob, Kurennaya says, were often considered unfeminine, insubordinate and morally loose.

That sounds silly a century later. In the post-feminist era, there’s arguably been an embrace of the glories of insubordination among many women.

— McClatchy-Tribune News

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What about

bo

This iconic hairstyle continues to evolve

I

t’s a simple look with a lingering hint of rebellion.

The bob — that century-old, typically jawline-length haircut — is surging again. You can see it in celebrity circles.

Golden-tressed Taylor Swift is a convert; Katy Perry followed suit, her version adding classic bangs; singer Brandy posted Instagram images debuting her asymmetrical version for an Oscars-related event. And when the Queen B — Beyonce — opened the Grammys earlier this year, her sexy lingerie was paired with a wetlook parted bob that exposed dark roots.

These different approaches are perfect examples of what’s best about the bob: versatility.

“It’s the most popular haircut I’m doing, and it really is the most versatile cut,” said Micah Davis at Art of Hair in Murphysboro.

“It’s a great cut for almost every face shape.” And it fits most personalities.

“It can be more sophisticated or more edgy and extreme.”

That gives women a range of choices, far beyond the prototypical one-length cut with bangs and a slight elevation in the

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back. Today’s bob includes layering and angling around the face. If there’s a bang, it’s often sideswept. And there’s often color, a variation that adds depth.

In Marion, Sherry Almaroad, owner and stylist at Cheveux Salon, has nothing but praise for the cut.

“Again, they are extremely versatile,” Sherry said.

“Someone with naturally curly hair can wear a natural bob that shows off the natural movement. If you have thin hair, the right kind of bob can make it look thicker. With bobs, you can get a lot of texture and movement.

It’s sleek and chic.”

bob?

The 20th century bob hairstyle symbolizes the independent, progressive and spirited woman. Many have turned to vintage-style bobbed hair to encourage a more daring side of their personality. Think Julia Roberts in ‘Pretty Woman.’ Think Uma Thurman in ‘Pulp Fiction.’ In a short story by literary great F. Scott Fitzgerald called ‘Bernice Bobs Her Hair,’ when Bernice got the bob, it signified a change in her personality from mousey to sassy. — VisforVintage.com

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ISIS wellness

The ‘GREENING’ of feminine hygiene A new trend is emerging in the feminine hygiene aisle, although our great-grandmothers would tell us it isn’t new at all!

W

BY RANA HODGE

hen it’s that time of the month, how much thought do you put in to your pads, liners and tampons? Do you buy the prettiest box or the cheapest brand? Are you a loyal customer to one brand? When was the last time you even questioned the products you threw in your shopping basket?

In place of chemically-treated, heavilypackaged and mass-marketed disposable products, more women are choosing alternative ways to deal with Aunt Flow. Isis interviewed Stephanie Willoughby, wellness manager at The Neighborhood Co-op Grocery in Carbondale to find out why so many women are opting for ways to have a “greener” period.

WHAT ARE ALTERNATIVE MENSTRUAL PRODUCTS? “Prior to the 1940s,” Stephanie said, “there were no disposable menstruation products.

Women used cloth rags or towels that they could wash, dry and use over and over again. It is my personal belief that reusable products never really disappeared; they just went the way of many other natural traditions with the dawn of the disposable,

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SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

pre-made, ‘use it and get rid of it’ mindset.

Concern for the environment and knowledge of what chemicals do to our bodies weren’t issues for a long time. Once we started to understand these things, women demanded a healthier alternative for themselves and the planet.”

Common alternatives to disposable pads, liners and tampons include cloth pads (such as the Glad Rag) and tampon alternatives (like the Moon Cup or Sea Pearl Sea Sponge).

WHY CHOOSE THESE PRODUCTS? Women who opt for alternative menstrual products each have their own personal reasons.

The main reasons identified would be: • They are natural and/or made of organic materials and have not been chemically treated.

• To save money. Reusable products are much more cost effective because you can buy one or two items and reuse them for a year or even longer.

• They are earth-friendly. They prevent disposable products and packaging from going in the trash, and they don’t require harsh manufacturing practices.

• The belief that menstrual flow is sacred.

By using a cup or sponge, a woman is able to contain the menstrual blood and offer it back to the earth.

’ POPULAR NATURAL PRODUCTS Each of these products is available at The Neighborhood Co-op in Carbondale. Check at natural and/or organic stores in your area for similar items.

GLADRAGS $14.99/ONE, $38.99/SET OF 3

MOON CUP $34.99 This is The Co-op’s No. 1 seller. The Moon Cup is inserted like a tampon, but it collects the menstrual liquid rather than absorbing it. The Moon Cup is made from medical-grade silicone, so it is safe for anyone with latex allergies.

An alternative to disposable pads and liners, GladRags are comfortable, safe and convenient. GladRags have tiny snaps to hold them securely in place. They also come with a small liner that can be used alone or with the winged pad for heavy flows. GladRags are washer/ dryer safe.

JADE & PEARL SEA SPONGE TAMPONS $16.39 These reusable tampons absorb just as much, if not more, liquid than traditional tampons. They are made from a completely natural source, so you don’t have to worry about anything potentially hazardous entering your body.

Some women cut the sponges in halves or thirds.

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

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ISIS wellness

USE CAUTION

Please note that some essential oils are contraindicated with certain health conditions or medications, and exposure to volatiles may cause negative reactions in some. It is advised to exercise caution and contact your physician before use. And, according to the Environmental Working Group, there are over 10,000 chemicals in personal care products, many of which are known toxins or carcinogens and do not require pre-approval from the FDA.

ESSENTIAL to your health?

BY BETH MICHAELS

E

ssential oils are derivatives from plants (leaves, stems, flowers, bark or roots) which have been used medicinally for health and healing for thousands of years. While not “essential” to human functioning, these oils can be therapeutic as well as natural substitutes for pharmaceutical or chemicalbased cosmetics, flavorings and cleaning agents.

MAKE MINE PURE Oils can be absorbed through the skin, inhaled or ingested. It’s important to ensure purity when choosing essential oils as utilization of chemicals in extraction can negate health benefits at best and cause harm at worst. Make sure you choose an organic source, a reputable brand and a dark bottle (oils can be damaged by heat and light).

There are benefits to essential oils, but you have to be careful; purity is also essential IT’S GOOD TO BE WEAK Essential oils are highly concentrated and, in most cases, should be diluted for use. Five to 10 drops in a bathtub, vaporizer or recipe is sufficient.

BENEFITS Examples of potential health benefits gained from use of various essential oils include: Muscle ache alleviation (marjoram, lemongrass, basil), digestion (peppermint, ginger, cardamom), relaxation (lavender, chamomile, citrus oils), antiinfective (tea tree oil, oregano), oral health (clove oil, myrrh, wintergreen) and skin conditions (frankincense, tea tree oil, fennel).

BETH MICHAELS is a registered dietitian in Southern Illinois. Find her at www.nourishingpassions.com. ‌

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

37

ISIS couples

Keep your relationship and your love life

ssssizzzzling Whether you consider yourself a Mr. Big, a Carrie Bradshaw or a sexual novice, everybody can get the most pleasure out of sex with a little more knowledge

S

o, you’ve been dating or maybe even married a while and your significant other has settled into your life like he was always there.

It’s comforting and comfortable and, well, maybe getting a bit too “normal,” bordering on boring. At least you’re noticing there’s a problem or potential problem, so you’re one step ahead of the game.

It’s time to devote some thought to this and — more than that — some action before boring becomes breakup.

Keeping the passion alive in a relationship is part of the work that partners must take on if they want their relationship to stay healthy and vital. And that

38

“passion” doesn’t begin and end in the bedroom. It begins and ends with honest communication.

“The secret to a good marriage is not compromise,

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

it’s collaboration,” said Annette Vaillancourt, Carbondale psychotherapist and the Elite SoulMate Coach. “Compromise breeds resentment, especially

USE FOREPLAY TO SET THE MOOD THROUGHOUT THE DAY Foreplay shouldn’t take place just in the two or three minutes before you and your partner have intercourse — and it isn’t always physical.

It should begin hours, if not days, before.

Here are just a few ways of how to work foreplay into the small moments of everyday life: • Sneak a suggestive note into her purse or his pocket before work, or put sexy sticky notes where they’ll get the most attention.

• Subtly show him that you’re wearing your sexiest lingerie under

your business suit.

• Send her a dozen roses, one at a time.

• Text message love notes.

VARIETY IS THE SPICE OF YOUR (SEX) LIFE Variety makes life more interesting. If you always go to the same restaurant, that repetition can get boring, and boredom doesn’t help keep those romantic fires burning. The need for variety also holds true in the bedroom. If you always make love exactly the same way, at the same time, and in the same place, the

routine can become boring. A woman may actually come to dread the way a man always touches her in the exact same way. His touch doesn’t make her feel special or wanted; it makes her feel like an old shoe.

• Take turns ordering a sex toy on the web.

• Once a week, make love in a room other than your bedroom.

• Have sex for a month without once using the missionary position.

• Make love blindfolded.

— Reprinted with permission from ForDummies.com

‘I CAN’T TELL YOU HOW MANY TIMES I’VE HEARD WOMEN SAY, “IF I HAVE TO ASK FOR WHAT I WANT, IT WON’T MEAN AS MUCH.” NOW, THAT’S JUST UNREALISTIC AND UNFAIR. MEN ARE NOT MIND-READERS. WE HAVE TO LEARN TO ASK FOR WHAT WE WANT AND THEN GIVE HIM TIME TO RESPOND, BE MORE PATIENT.’ ANNETTE VAILLANCOURT when only one partner is doing most of the compromising. But you can’t have collaboration without communication, and too many couples aren’t communicating at all or are communicating poorly.

“We want men to listen to us, to empathize and to acknowledge our feelings.

When we don’t get that attention we crave, we tend to criticize, and that takes all of the wind out of a guy’s sails.

We want reassurance; we want to hear those three magic

words, but we don’t want to ask for it.”

Men and women simply communicate differently, Annette said. One method isn’t better than another; we just need to learn each other’s language.

“Don’t make each problem or miscommunication a power struggle. Learn how to deal with problems as a team, and you’ll create real intimacy in the relationship. Each time you do, you’ll feel closer, you’ll trust more, your bond will become

stronger, and your love life will reflect that closeness.

“Attraction is good, but a relationship takes skill, courage, emotional maturity, knowing how to manage your own emotions and how to open up and test the waters. You must be willing to be vulnerable and be able to respond to vulnerability with compassion.

You have to believe that your partner is trustworthy. Yes, it’s hard work, but very rewarding.

When you have that kind of relationship, the sky’s the limit!”

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

39

ISIS fitness

Salsa is a fun and flirtatious form of partner dancing, fusing steamy Afro-Caribbean and Latin styles into simple and lively movements. The word “salsa” is Spanish for “sauce” (usually hot and spicy), which is an appropriate description for a dance that is energetic, passionate and sexy.

HOT O HOT HOT Step into salsa, and you may never be the same again

BY CHANDA GREEN

n a whim or a dare, you’ve signed up for a dance class and you find yourself in a line of similarly selfconscious newbies, trying to mimic the moves of the instructor without tripping over your own insecurities.

The instructor takes you through a few basics then pairs you up. The nervousness returns, but not for long.

With a few minor adjustments you’re spinning and strutting, swaying and smiling at your partner, no longer staring at your feet.

The music propels you, a physical force that moves through your muscles like an electric current.

What’s next? Teach me another move: a cross-body lead? Sure, I’m ready!

You move past your partner and turn. On the third or fourth time, you start shifting your hips and adding some “flair” with arm movements

GET FIT, LOSE WEIGHT You need only look at participants on “Dancing with the Stars” to see how good dancing is for you – and how it can whip you into fantastic shape. Although you probably won’t attempt as rigorous a workout as the celebs do, it’s still a good workout.

1. It gets your heart rate up – even higher if you’ve got a partner you like.

2. It’s a weight-bearing activity, which keeps your bones strong.

3. It’s great movement, which tones music.

4. It burns fat and calories. If you’re really giving it all you got, you should burn an average of about 10 calories per minute.

The best part? If you find the activity exhilarating – and salsa dancing is certainly that – you’re more likely to stick with it.

When you don’t have class, you can practice your routines at home, even without your partner, to keep burning calories every day of the week.

Just be sure that you stretch before you work out and keep yourself hydrated.

— ThreeFatChicks.com

WHERE DO I START?

that make you feel like you’re flying.

Hello, introduce yourself, you’re a salsa-holic. You’ve had a taste and you can’t wait to get some more.

Don’t worry, it’s a really healthy addiction, one that you’ll feed with each step, each lesson, each practice session at home, each foray onto a dance floor.

It won’t take long before you’re planning your free time around any place or event that might offer a chance to get that lighter-than-air feeling back, that intoxicatingly graceful and self-confident selfimage.

Such is the nature of this very simple, yet breathtakingly beautiful art form, one that reaches its zenith when you and your partner begin to move as if you’ve always danced together.

You speak to each other without a single word. A subtle change in pressure or slight movement and you’re spinning and turning together.

He creates the space and you move within it, adjusting as you dance to where he wants to go and where you are in that moment.

Your eyes are locked and your smiles are wide. You’re no longer thinking about what you’re doing.

The rest of the dancers have disappeared. You’ve surrendered to the music and connected to your partner by that invisible thread, you’re moving as if propelled by the joy of the dance itself.

GREAT SALSA TUNES “No Me Hace Falta” by Victor Manuelle “Corazon”

by Gilberto Santa Rosa “Caridad” by Gloria Estefan

SALSA DANCE MOVIES “Dance with Me” with Chayanne and Vanessa Williams “Shall We Dance?” with Richard Gere and Jennifer Lopez “Take the Lead” with Antonio Banderas

La Fogata restaurant in Carbondale hosts Salsa Saturday Night every week from 8:30 to about 1 a.m. If you’re a newbie, don’t worry; they have lots of people who love to teach beginners, and the owners say there are plenty of people who would love to take you for a spin. Check it out at the restaurant at 519 S. Illinois Ave. John A. Logan College in Carterville offers Latin dancing classes in its Continuing Education department. Don Wooters is the instructor. He’s been dancing for 20 years, Latin dancing for the past decade.

Don’s beginners’ class at JALC lasts for eight, 90-minute sessions. The first 45 minutes is devoted to the merengue and the last 45 to salsa.

Latin dance instructor Don Wooters works with a pair of students, Richie and Mattie, during a class.

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

41

ISIS family

MOST COMMON NEWPARENT

FIGHTS (and how to start getting along)

M

aybe you used to greet your partner at the door with a smile and a kiss, or maybe more than that! It’s going to be a tough first few months. Having a baby really does change everything. No one was lying about that.

Cathy O’Neil, co-author of “Babyproofing Your Marriage” (William Morrow Paperbacks, $14.99), shows us how to move past the biggest new-parent obstacles without bodily harm.

FIGHT NO. 1: WHOSE SLEEP IS MORE IMPORTANT? Whether you’re the one working or the one staying home with baby, both of you should be allowed to catch a few extra ZZZZZs here and there. Make sleep a priority. Skip the weekly soccer game with buddies or leave that sink full of dishes for a while and sleep instead.

FIGHT NO. 2: KEEPING SCORE Instead of making mental lists of who did or didn’t do what, make a master list of everything you both need to do and then divide. Be fair with each other and tackle the jobs together.

FIGHT NO. 3: WHICH IS THE ‘RIGHT WAY’ TO DO IT? 42

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

S The parent who’s around baby most usually feels in charge of how things should go. But if you find yourself constantly telling your partner how to parent, he or she will never know the basics. Take a close look at what your partner did “wrong.” Was the juice that big of a deal? If it’s not critical in the grand scheme of raising your child, just let it go.

FIGHT NO. 4: BIG THINGS THAT GO UNAPPRECIATED It’s easy to feel like all you’re doing for your family and the new baby isn’t appreciated. But, remember, it goes both ways. It doesn’t take a grand gesture, maybe a small “Thanks for cleaning out the diaper pail” or “Wow, you really dress our baby cutely.”

FIGHT NO. 5: LACK OF SEX There’s no wrong way to feel here. You both are right. Try to see your partner’s side of it. What would it be like if you two didn’t talk for a week? For some, that’s what it feels like to not have sex for that long. Why not schedule some sex? Sure, it sounds not-so-spontaneous or exciting, and it might not be at first; but, eventually, once you’re both back in the swing of things, you’ll get back into your old groove.

— Excerpted from an article by Shannon Guyton at TheBump.com; reprinted with permission from McClatchy-Tribune News.

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43

ISIS online

Blogger SPOTLIGHT

Bloggers Wanted!

Southern Illinois Kid’s Stuff

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Got great ideas for home, fashion or fitness?

‌T

he Southern Illinois Kid’s Stuff blog doesn’t have the bells and whistles of some others we’ve featured. But, with the kids screaming for your attention and a to-do list backing up with tasks, sometimes simplicity is simply perfect.

Southern Illinois offers a variety of things for parents and their kids to do, but events, activities and attractions often get lost

in the shuffle of everyday life. This blog brings all that information and more together in one place.

The author, identified only as SouthernIllinoisMom, offers a listing of upcoming family-oriented events, dining recommendations, ideas for day-trip getaways to places like Cape Girardeau and Paducah and more. Many of the activities highlighted here are available at little or no cost, making them especially intriguing for parents on a budget.

Check it out at http://sikidsstuff.blogspot.com

Share with us to be considered and possibly be published in the next issue of ISIS! Email us at lacey.thompson @thesouthern.com.

SUMMER 2014 | thesouthern.com/isis

As Carla laid in a coma the doctors told her family to brace for the worst. Then something miraculous happened—Carla woke up. But that’s only the beginning of Carla’s amazing rehabilitation journey!

Only Southern Illinois Healthcare has a long-standing alliance with the Rehabilitation Institute of Chicago (RIC) giving you access to expert care. RIC has earned the ranking of “Best Rehabilitation Hospital in America” by US. News & World Report for 23 Conveniently located: consecutive years.

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