The Spectrum Vol.69 No.25

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VOL. 69 NO. 25 | NOVEMBER 25, 2019

THE INDEPENDENT STUDENT PUBLICATION OF THE UNIVERSITY AT BUFFALO, SINCE 1950

UBSPECTRUM

‘Fragile’ Life as a student, stripper, survivor > SEE PAGE 6

New York State Police Hate Crimes Task Force to investigate with UPD following governor’s direction BRENTON J. BLANCHET EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

Editor’s note: This article refers to the usage of slurs and symbols that could upset readers. Students are concerned following The Spectrum’s report of racist, anti-Semitic and homophobic slurs and symbols found on a Knox Hall bathroom stall Friday. On Friday at 7 p.m., Gov. Andrew Cuomo directed the New York State Police Hate Crimes Task Force to assist University Police in investigating the graffiti, which included the N-word, two swastikas and a homophobic slur written in red marker. Cuomo’s announcement came six hours after The Spectrum notified UPD of the writing. A University Facilities crew removed the graffiti immediately after UPD located it, according to UB spokesperson John DellaContrada and UPD Deputy Chief Joshua Sticht. Cuomo, in a statement, said he was “dis-

gusted” by the graffiti. “In New York, there is no place for hate, and we will continue to rise up and condemn every cowardly act, anywhere it appears that targets and threatens people because of their race, religion or sexual orientation,” Cuomo said. UB President Satish Tripathi sent a community-wide email Friday night following Cuomo’s announcement, stating that “racism and hatred will not be tolerated” at UB. “I believe that this deplorable act is not indicative of who we are as a university community,” Tripathi wrote. “And, this appears to be an isolated incident. Regardless, together we must seek to cultivate and nurture an environment where racism, intolerance and hatred are rendered extinct.” Sticht wrote in an email that UPD has had 18 reports of graffiti so far this year, with two involving swastikas, one including an “anti-African-American reference” and one homophobic reference. The Spectrum reported on similar anti-Semitic graffiti in 2016, when UPD investigated

WaYnE PEnaLES / The SpecTrum a Tour WalkS ouTSide oF knoX hall FridaY.

slurs written on a men’s bathroom stall in Capen Hall. The discovery comes amidst protests at Syracuse University where at least 14 racist or bias-related occurrences have been reported since Nov. 7, according to The

Daily Orange. Student protesters, part of the #NotAgainSU movement, criticized SU’s four-day delay in response to racist graffiti found in a dormitory. > SEE GRAFFITI | PAGE 2

Freshman withdrawing from school following dorm fire Student didn’t have renters insurance, UB not responsible BRITTANY GORNY SENIOR NEWS EDITOR

Freshman Nichole Mahler plans to withdraw from UB following the Nov. 10 Dewey Hall fire, where she lost nearly all of her belongings including her ID, laptop and credit cards. The fire, which damaged only Mahler’s belongings, evacuated roughly 800 students in the Governors Complex around 11 a.m. UPD reported the fire appeared to be caused by a heater, but the cause is still under investigation, although Mahler says a UB dorm heater, behind her dresser, caused the fire in her suite. Still, UB’s Campus Living Housing agreement states UB is not responsible for any damages to students’ personal belongings in the event of a fire unless the student has renters insurance, which UB “strongly recommends.” But Mahler said she didn’t have, or know about, renters insurance. UB has just under 8,000 students living on campus, according to Michael Koziej, senior associate director for Campus Living, but doesn’t compile information on how many students have insurance coverage. “We strongly recommend renters insurance to our students and we encourage students to look at their parents’ homeowners insurance to confirm coverage,” Koziej wrote in an email. Mahler said UB “did not say a word” to her about renters insurance. “I asked my mom if I had it and she had no idea what it was and stated they never asked if we wanted it when I enrolled here,” Mahler said. “All she remembers is signing something stating that UB is not liable for things like this.” UB’s Campus Living Housing Agree-

COurtESY OF Maria CranE freShman nichole mahler decided to withdraw from uB due to the fire at deweY hall where She SaYS She loSt nearlY all her BelongingS.

ment states that “Campus Living does not assume any obligation or liability for loss or damage to items of personal property … This includes but is not limited to damage, loss, fire, water damage, theft, flood-

ing, etc. Students are strongly encouraged to purchase renters insurance for protection against loss or property damage.” Fire investigators finished analyzing the scene at 4:30 p.m. on Nov. 10 and the

three girls who lived in the suite gathered their belongings, according to the police report. UB relocated Mahler, a biomedical sciences major, and her two roommates to a Creekside Village apartment, providing bedding and pillows. Mahler said UB left them “without basic needs” like soap and toilet paper. Koziej wrote that when students move into UB’s apartments, Campus Living doesn’t provide toiletries. “This move was done quickly, during an emergency situation and the lack of toiletries was an oversight,” Koziej wrote. “Had we known that the students were lacking these items, we could have provided them.” Mahler’s friend Maria Crane, a freshman occupational therapy major, and her friends started a GoFundMe page for Mahler and her roommates which raised $1,445 as of Saturday afternoon. “I don’t know what [UB’s] plan of emergency is, but they didn’t even get them basic needs like toilet paper,” Crane said. “So we figured if we started [the GoFundMe] it could get them by with essential stuff to live.” Mahler said she woke up at 10:45 a.m. that morning to the smell of smoke in her room, Dewey 101B. She saw smoke coming from her dorm’s heater behind her dresser, so she woke up her roommates, left the room and called 911. “The police came and opened the door to our room and tried to go in, but there was so much smoke, they couldn’t get in there,” Mahler said. “And that was only five minutes after we had left.” Mahler sat in a police car while UPD questioned her. During the investigation, Mahler said police were “looking for somewhere to blame.” They asked her and her roommates if they had problems with each oth> SEE FIRE | PAGE 2


2 | Monday, November 25 2019 GRAFFITI FROM PAGE 1

After an eight-day protest of SU’s handling of the situation and SU Chancellor Kent Syverud’s agreeance to an “edited” version of the group’s 18 demands, the group is still calling for Syverud’s resignation. Some of the demands that Syverud agreed to included stricter consequences for hate speech and mandatory diversity training for faculty and staff. Some students, like sophomore psychology major Brandon Hoolihan, were surprised to find out about the graffiti when they opened Tripathi’s email. “It seems like the issues at SU are now inspiring other people at UB, which is honestly horrendous,” Hoolihan said. “And I think this campus tries to at least FIRE FROM PAGE 1

er and if they would ever try to do something like this to each other, according to Mahler. Joshua Sticht, UPD deputy chief of police, wrote in an email that UPD doesn’t “believe the fire to be criminal.” “Investigators have to ask direct questions to ensure that we arrive at the truth, whatever the truth happens to be for a particular case,” Sticht wrote. Koziej said the students “were referred to UB’s Office of Student Conduct and Advocacy to seek support from the UB Student Life Emergency Gift Fund, which offers temporary financial assistance for immediate and current emergency situations.” But Mahler said she filed a claim and signed up for the emergency fund assistance but hasn’t heard back, as of Wednesday. “The emergency is kind of over now, they should have done something in the first couple of days,” Mahler said. She said the whole experience was “traumatizing,” and she “had to reach out” to counselors get her “own” emotional help. Koziej said “students were offered UB’s Counseling Services and the UB Card Of-

NEWS make good efforts toward diversity. So I think speech like this, especially in public settings, is terrible.” Director of the Office of Equity, Diversity and Inclusion Sharon Nolan-Weiss wrote in an email that anyone who feels they are “subject to a hostile environment on any discriminatory basis” may consult with her office. “It is important to remember that individuals who look to upset and offend others through graffiti do not represent the values held by the UB community,” Nolan-Weiss wrote. Marc Duqueney, a senior communication and sociology major at UB, said he hasn’t seen hateful graffiti before at UB but remembers The Spectrum’s Nov. 7 report of a local contractor bringing a confice provided new UB cards at no cost for individuals whose cards were damaged in the fire.” “Students have also been informed of and provided information for UB’s small claims process for loss of property,” Koziej said. “All students were given multiple points of contact and encouraged to reach out if they need anything. Parents of affected students have also been contacted by the university and we’ll continue to update them.” Koziej says Campus Living has taken steps to “re-educate” students on fire safety. “Campus Living staff are conducting room by room inspections and will continue them over the next few weeks to ensure compliance with Campus Living guidelines,” Koziej said. Mahler went home to Saratoga Springs on Tuesday where she will present her case to the Office of the Registrar to see if she is eligible for withdrawal from UB for the remainder of the semester. Students who experience events “outside of their control that impact their ability to perform in academics” are eligible for academic withdrawal, according to UB’s website. Students who withdraw will receive a “W” in all enrolled courses in order to retake them in future semesters.

federate flag to campus. He said he’s also heard of the 2015 “white only” and “black only” signs that a student posted on campus for an art project. “[I’m] sad and disappointed but becoming less and less surprised with the growing incidents,” Duqueney said. “I don’t know, I naively thought this state and school would be exempt from bigotry.” “So far I like [UB’s] action, but I’m waiting to see if it goes anywhere.” Ishitri Bandyopadhyay, a senior biomedical sciences major, said she felt the graffiti was unsettling because UB is a “very diverse place.” “I know that Syracuse recently had its incident with racial slurs, but I just feel like we’re in a time now where that shouldn’t even be showing up anymore,” Bandyo-

ubspectrum.com padhyay said. “I would think that people realize that a lot of people come from other backgrounds and if you come to a school like this, you should be open to [that] fact.” Sticht wrote that when the community reports graffiti quickly, UPD has a “better chance of locating” those responsible. UB encourages anyone with information about the graffiti to contact UPD at 716-645-2227 or ub-police@buffalo.edu. Alexandra Moyen contributed reporting to this story. Email: brenton.blanchet@ubspectrum.com Twitter: @BrentonBlanchet

aLEXandEr BrOWn / the Spectrum a fireman holdS a hoSe outSide of deweY hall on noV. 10.

Mahler said she hopes to “start over next semester,” but UB is moving the three back into the same room in Dewey Hall next semester. Koziej said Campus Living is “working closely” with contractors and anticipates work to be done before the spring semester. He said the office will work with the students to find other options “based on available vacancies.”

“This took a huge toll on my mental health because it was kind of traumatizing,” Mahler said. “So I’m going home for the rest of the semester, taking a withdrawal and starting over next semester.” Email: brittany.gorny@ubspectrum.com Twitter: @BrittanyGorny


OPINION

ubspectrum.com

My constant battle with body dysmorphia

REILLY MULLEN ASST. FEATURES EDITOR

This column contains sensitive content about eating disorders which may be triggering for some readers. Thirteen-year-old girls are supposed to fawn over Justin Beiber. Instead, in eighth grade, I was counting the calories in a stick of gum. I am the oldest of three children to two of the best parents anyone could ask for. I cannot stress enough that they are incredibly caring, present and involved. But, being the oldest child is stressful. The constant expectation to be self-sufficient, well-behaved and a role-model can be soul crushing. I strove to personify the coveted status of “the golden child.” But this led me to overwork myself. I forced myself to join every extracurricular activity that would fit in my sched-

ule, while still striving to maintain perfect grades. Travel soccer team captain. Varsity tennis in seventh grade. Model UN president. Student Council. Band and chorus officer. Varsity track team captain. Honor roll. And each proud Facebook post my parents wrote about my accomplishments fueled both my own self-pride and my constant obsession with perfection. But on the inside, I was breaking. My life seemed out of control, and at such a young age I couldn’t see any options for how to find balance. I couldn’t bear to quit the activities that I wore as a badge of honor for fear of disappointing those who valued my success. So I turned to other methods of control. My relationship with food became a method of coping with my pre-existing anxiety and depression. I couldn’t choose whether or not to go to soccer practice on Sunday mornings, but I could choose whether or not to skip lunch. I found myself spiraling out of control, dropping weight that I couldn’t afford to lose. Every mirror I looked in morphed itself into a funhouse attraction that showed my slim physique far heavier than it actually was. This unhealthy habit was brought to my parents’ attention when I began seeing a school therapist in eighth grade. She encouraged them to take me to see a professional to discuss my issues with body dysmorphia. This began my regular visits to Strong

Memorial Hospitals’ Childhood and Adolescent Eating Disorder Program where I was diagnosed with anorexia. My team of doctors and nutritionists urged me to change my behavior. Through eating journals and threats of feeding tubes, through private shaming and accusations of selfishness, I was pressured to decide to change on my own before my options were taken away. These monthly visits lasted for a year. In that time, my weight and diet were monitored and I was enrolled in bi-weekly meetings with a therapist. I wish I could tell you that beating anorexia is as easy as a couple of therapy sessions and a hard scolding from a physician. It’s not. Although I deeply admire the drive that it takes to challenge mental illness –– and anorexia is a mental illness –– I cannot say that my own team of specialists provided the best service. Doctors who preferred scare techniques to education, and a therapist whose only method of connecting was to compare me to her own daughter, destroyed my confidence and psyche. The road to recovery has been winding and, although I would not currently consider myself anorexic, I still struggle daily with the intrusive thoughts that once lured

Monday, November 25 2019 | 3 me into starving myself. My body still has not recovered from the trauma it has experienced, and this, coupled with my more recent struggle with a complicated digestive disorder, has resulted in multiple hospital visits this semester alone. Every emergency room stay comes with a bombarding of those same accusations that I did not care enough about my family to get better, and a slew of shameful and disappointed looks from clinicians who do not know my story. The thing about eating disorders is that they’re incredibly personal. You wouldn’t tell a cancer patient that they’re ruining their family’s life so they need to just “get over it.” Similarly, mental illnesses are uncontrollable. When a person develops an eating disorder, they are not selfish. They are sick. They are not malicious. They are scared. If someone you care about shows symptoms of anorexia, bulimia, binge eating disorder or other mental illnesses such as anxiety or depression, the best thing you can do to help them is to tell them that you love them and you are there if they need anything. The worst way to sympathize with someone with an eating disorder is to make it about yourself and to tell them how it’s affecting you. They have bigger things to worry about. I had an eating disorder. Millions of people around the world — girls and boys alike — have struggled with eating disorders. I refuse to silence my story for the comfort and approval of others. Email: reilly.mullen@ubspectrum.com Twitter: @ReillyMMullen

Women have been ‘surfing the crimson tide’ long enough We need to talk openly about menstrual health

ISABELLA FORTUNATO STAFF WRITER

Once a month, I find the best way to spend the minute break between my classes is frantically searching through my bag for a tampon that isn’t there. As I rush into class 15 minutes late, the cherry on top is that explaining the reason behind my deliquency is completely out of the question. But I doubt I’m the only student who feels like “Aunt Flow” visits at the most inconvenient times. And the worst part is, we’re shamed for talking about it. Being unable to talk openly about such an integral and regular part of women’s health simply acts as an extra hurdle to scale. Women can’t help that they menstruate. Getting a period should not be something

MONDAY NOVEMBER 25, 2019 VOLUME 69 NUMBER 25 CIRCULATION: 4,000

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that is held against women at work, school or even in the White House (I’m looking at you President Trump). But even in otherwise progressive societies, it still is. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not perfectly period-positive. When I’m reaching into my purse for my phone and accidentally throw a tampon onto the floor I’m just as embarrassed as the next girl. But if we all try to be more accepting of the various aspects of femininity, we can start to change the world’s depiction of female health for good. The period was historically and culturally viewed as a curse bestowed upon women in many cultures. In some of the more extreme cases, women underwent degrading rituals associating shame with menstruation. Disheartening practices of this nature are still implemented in some parts of the world today. Even in the U.S., period shaming is ingrained in our culture. We raise women to believe their “lady problems” should be kept quiet, especially when around men. This rhetoric is repeated by mothers, teachers and even doctors. Most women will spend ten whole years of their lives menstruating, but the vast majority still find it hard to publicly acknowledge that their period exists. In the height of the feminist movement, women were advocating for being treated exactly the same as men, which at the time

The views expressed – both written and graphic – in the Opinion section of The Spectrum do not necessarily reflect the views of the editorial board. Submit contributions for these pages to The Spectrum office at Suite 132 Student Union or news@ubspectrum. com. The Spectrum reserves the right to edit these pieces for style and length. If a letter is not meant for publication, please mark it as such. All submissions must include the author’s name, daytime phone number, and email address.

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meant not recognizing aspects of being a woman that are unique to being a female. Advertisements for pads and tampons started to reflect the idea that the only way women would ever be treated equally was if their period ceased to exist. Some advertisements still reflect this idea. Always-brand menstrual products markets a “sport” line with products that claim to make it possible for women to be just as active on their period as they are off. While this frame of mindset isn’t inherently bad, it still makes it seem like having a menstrual cycle is something abnormal that needs to be patched up and forgotten about. Our blatant refusal to acknowledge a natural part of the reproductive cycle causes women to feel an unpreventable part of their life is something bad. Thinx period-proof underwear came out with a commercial recently that contrasts the typical depiction of periods. The ad comically shows what it would be like if men also had menstrual cycles and states “if we all had them maybe we would be comfortable with them.” Most major network television channels refused to run the ad until it was edited to be more “appropriate.” CBS originally banned the ad altogether because it claimed the content was “too graphic.” It’s great that some menstrual product distributors are trying to be more periodpositive but the media’s general disgust

at Thinx’s commercial only proves how much further we still have to go. Women all over the world lack access to proper menstrual products and many times don’t even have the right to talk about this major dilemma. According to Cora. a menstrual product company, there are 25 million women in the U.S. alone who live in poverty who are unable to purchase female sanitary products with food stamps. This doesn’t account for women in developing nations who have even less access to proper care. UB’s recent addition of free pads and tampons in select bathrooms puts it a step ahead of most other public places when it comes to female health, but this is only a start. It’s time for everyone to start talking about menstruation without disgust and shame, so we can dismantle the roadblocks in the way of proper female health care in our country and around the world. Because menstruation is not an option, period. Email: opinion@ubspectrum.com


NEWS

4 | Monday, November 25 2019

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UB professors discuss ‘New Perspectives on Women’s Health’ Professors discuss reproductive health in African refugees, health effects in regions of conflict DONOVAN NEWKIRK STAFF WRITER

Professors Kafuli Agbemenu and Shaanta Murshid discussed reproductive healthcare for African refugees and the health effects women face in regions experiencing conflict on Tuesday afternoon. Twenty UB community members attended the presentation, New Perspectives on Women’s Health, where Murshid and Agbemenu presented on the importance of minority women’s health at Hayes Hall. Murshid, a professor in the School of Social Work, discussed her recent research on the implications of microfinance, neoliberalism and violence on women. Agbemenu, an assistant professor at the School of Nursing, discussed her research on re-

productive health practices among African refugee women and how language barriers and differences in education increase their vulnerability to poor healthcare Agbemenu began by clarifying the difference between immigrants and refugees, saying a refugee leaves their country against their own will for safety reasons, whereas an immigrant “wants to be here.” Of the African refugees who reside in New York, nearly 95% reside upstate, according to Agbemenu. “In the next few years, we expect a prolific number of refugees to be resettled in the Buffalo area,” Agbemenu said. Agbemenu’s work revolves around the reproductive health of the 23% of New York’s African refugees. Agbemenu conducted a survey of 101 African refugees residing in New York over the course of a year. Agbemenu said 99% of American women have knowledge of various forms of contraception that are available to them but only 47.5% of African refugees had knowledge of contraception methods at their disposal. Of the African refugees

Gordon mYerS / thE SPECtruM Kafuli agBemenu (left) and Shaanta murShid (right) preSent perSpectiVeS on women’S health during a gloBal health eQuitY Brown Bag Seminar.

Gordon mYerS / thE SPECtruM Kafuli agBemenu (left) and Shaanta murShid (right) talK to audience memBerS during tueSdaY’S preSentation.

who used contraception, the majority used it for birth spacing, to control their time between births, as opposed to actual longterm birth prevention. At first, people “criticized” Agbemenu for studying African refugees as a whole, as opposed to analyzing subsects. “I believe many people have a hard time understanding Africa is a continent and not a country, so I was fearful that any further division would complicate and dilute the potential results of my research,” Agbemenu said. Agbemenu described her work as both “fulfilling” and “exhausting.” She ultimately blamed the language barrier as the main reason her research took so much time. “It took a while to conduct the survey because many of these women did not speak or read English,” Agbemenu said. “Many of the women did not read or write in any language. Fortunately, I have native fluency in Swahili. That definitely expedited the process.” Murshid’s research focuses on the ongoing conflict in Kashmir, a majorityMuslim area, that is territorially contested by both India and Pakistan. There have recently been heightened tensions between Kashmir and Pakistan. The conflict in Kashmir has had a “nega-

tive” impact on women’s mental and physical health, according to Murshid. Murshid said 41% of women in the region experience depression, 26% experience anxiety and 19% posttraumatic stress disorder. “As we have seen recently in national and international news, the power tends to consolidate at the top,” Murshid said. Megan Smith, an Emerson Fellow at UB’s Food Laboratory, said the presentation was an informative and unique opportunity to hear from two women of color discussing research that they were so passionate about. “To hear from a researcher who is originally from the continent of Africa talk about her work with refugee populations in Buffalo was inspiring,” Smith said. “Her lived experience is profound and I am glad that I was able to hear her story and see the results of her research today.” Murshid concluded the presentation by urging the audience to talk more about the topic to make the public more aware of the issues some women are experiencing. “If we ever hope to truly ameliorate these issues and disparities, then we must begin to see the trauma that is caused by conflict as a public health concern,” Murshid said Email: news@ubspectrum.com

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FEATURES

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Monday, November 25 2019 | 5

Getting swole with ‘soyboy’ UB alum, bodybuilder hopes to turn fitness passion into career SAMANTHA VARGAS SENIOR FEATURES EDITOR

When people think of bodybuilders, most imagine spray tans, giant muscles and vain attitudes. But Cole Hastings wants to move away from the “meathead” stereotype. Literally. Hastings, a ‘19 alum, is hoping to turn his passion for bodybuilding and veganism into a career. The Buffalo native has established a personal training service through individual coaching, plant-based meal plans and personalized workout routines on his website. He has developed a following on social media with 1,580 YouTube subscribers and an Instagram with 19,000 followers. Hastings began his YouTube channel in 2017 to document his own development

with bodybuilding. He transitioned to building muscle through veganism in 2018 and his current videos are designed to help others explore the vegan-bodybuilder lifestyle. His goal is to educate people on building muscle on a vegan diet. “[Transitioning] to veganism was tough at first because I didn’t know how to formulate meals. It’s difficult for everyone at the start and you usually just have to learn from experience,” Hastings said. “Vegan food is less calorically dense. I had to learn how to eat more and more frequently, but still choose healthy options.” Hastings, who began bodybuilding in high school, said that his parents influenced his passion for health and fitness by encouraging him to exercise and maintain a healthy diet. “My dad would run every week and my mom pushed a healthy diet,” Hastings said. “This is what made the [transition] to being vegan easier. It was a combination of my mom and the research I had done about vegan athletes and what it could do to my body.” Hasting recalls feeling socially isolated and being teased by his friends because of his veganism. “They used to say stuff like I could only eat lettuce and grass and how I’m a hippie now,” Hastings said. “Being vegan has become way more mainstream now though. I don’t have that much trouble with people, or even ordering food in restaurants because of all the new options.”

Vegan Bodybuilding Meals in One Video,” which breaks down meal components. But he isn’t just in it for the money or the views. Hastings enjoys helping people achieve their fitness goals. Caleb Lee, a Buffalo native and childhood friend, has known Hastings since the seventh grade and noticed how Hastings’ training service changed him. “You can tell he’s super passionate about it,” Lee said. “He’s spent countless hours editing, creating content, working out and making meals. He has a sense of purpose. He just really cares [about health and fitness] and is trying to make a difference, and I think the message he’s trying to send out is really important.”

But Hasting says that any short-term setbacks are worth the significant changes he felt after beginning a vegan diet. He credits his diet for his newfound physical health. “I immediately felt a big change in endurance. My whole cardiovascular health improved, and I was able to run much longer than before,” Hasting said. “I used to get sick pretty often, but now I only get sick around once a year. I also felt more mentally balanced and clear-headed.” Now, he structures each program around individual customers after collecting information on their fitness goals and Samantha.Vargas@UBSpectrum.com body composition. His personalized work- Email: Twitter: at @SamMarieVargas out plans are $49 and include over 30 exercise tutorials and a weekly one-on-one session. The personalized vegan meal plan is $75 and includes weekly meal plans, grocery lists and one-on-one sessions. Hastings also offers one-on-one coaching where he provides guidance on workout routines and meal plans. He charges between $149 and $299 depending on the desired timeframe. His YouTube channel includes videos of his workout routines and exercises, which explain the specific techniques for certain muscle groups. He also has videos that explore his COurtESY OF COLE haStinGS ole haStingS, a uB alumni, haS eStaBliShed a perSonal training SerVice own vegan diet like, c through indiVidual coaching, plant-BaSed meal planS and perSonaliZed “An Entire Week of worKout routineS.

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6 | Monday, November 25 2019

Life as a student, stripper, survivor JACKLYN WALTERS MANAGING EDITOR

Haley Sheehan stands at the podium in front of her public speaking class, notecards in hand. She’s the first to present all semester. She looks at her professor and the 24-person audience and nods, signaling she’s ready. She takes a deep breath. “I’m a stripper,” she says. Her candor shocks her peers. The threeword opener couldn’t be a more perfect introduction to her blunt, carefree demeanor. But once Sheehan starts talking, it is clear to see her introduction is just that: the beginning. There’s more to her. She’s fragile. Sheehan knows men look at her. When they find out she’s a stripper, their looks turn to leers. “It’s like they turn into animals sometimes, I swear to God,” Sheehan said. “I’ve seen some guys I’ve known at UB that are really sweet to me come in [to the club] and … they just act crazy, say all these demeaning crazy things. Like I still have to see you next week dude.” When she does see them again, she acts normal, like they haven’t seen her almost naked. The dances, she reminds herself, weren’t for them; they’re for the money. And the money pays her UB tuition. It pays for her off-campus apartment. And it has since 2018. Sheehan lost her anticipated scholarship when UB cut its rowing team in 2016. A

courTeSY oF haleY Sheehan

NEWS

friend recommended stripping, and she hasn’t looked back since. Her mom knows she strips. Her dad “has a feeling.” But they both know she’s graduating college debt-free. Her manager knows she’s a UB student. He lets her do homework in his office between dances. “Sometimes I’m really tired,” she said of her dual roles. “But you know, school comes first. The reason I’m at the club is to put myself through school, so I know it’s something I’ve got to get done.” Some regulars know she’s a student, too. She tells them when she’s working the floor, talking with them for tips. Those moments are important; they bring in money. Those moments are hard; they make her vulnerable. She’s had to learn how much to share. The men, some of whom are married, usually just want to talk to “Fortune,” who dresses in black and makes them feel young and important. But most don’t get to know Haley. They don’t get to know the extroverted, junior exercise science major who spent nine hours a day at her younger brother’s bedside after a car accident left him in a coma. They don’t get to know the girl who struggled with bulimia for seven years, and is diagnosed with manic depression. Or the girl who found, lost and renounced religion. But they don’t want to know. They just want to watch Fortune dance. Fortune fulfills fantasies. Haley has dreams. “I definitely separate myself. You have to. Especially when you’re in there just talking to customers, you have to dissociate a little bit, or else they’d probably eat me alive. … I feel like if I didn’t dissociate, I would probably be absolutely insane.” Haley and Fortune are both part of Sheehan, who wants to graduate next year, open a gym and use some of the skills she’s learned in the club to build her professional life. She hopes to look back on this time with pride, and $150,000 in her bank account. But for now, she’s

embracing the opportunities her lucrative profession provides. “I’d say my favorite way to make money is probably on stage. When you’re on stage, it’s like this weird adrenaline rush. When someone starts throwing hundreds of dollars at you, you start bustin’ out moves that you did not even know you had to begin with, and it’s a good feeling. Honestly, it’s fun.”

‘Whirls and twirls and twerkin’’

Sheehan started stripping after UB unexpectedly cut the rowing team in 2016, which cost her a scholarship that would have covered “half of tuition and half of living expenses,” she said. She tried selling weed, but the money was meager and she didn’t want to go to jail for a “petty drug crime.” Then a friend told her about the club. She didn’t have any experience stripping, but she had always been exceptionally athletic and good on the dance floor. She was hired immediately. Now, she makes $2,000 a week for three seven-hour shifts. Her salary is over six times what she would make waitressing. On campus, Sheehan blends in, wearing jeans, Timberlands and her teddy-bear coat. She takes her classes and her work at the club equally seriously; both are propelling her toward a future as a gym owner, she says. Even at school, she carries Fortune inside her; she also carries Fortune’s bras, onesies and thongs in her trunk. Unlike some strippers, she keeps her look “simple,” she said, straying from long eyelashes and sparkles. “I don’t do anything crazy. My client base is very simple men and I don’t think that would make me money,” Sheehan said. “But it’s dark as hell in there so honestly you could look like s--t. Nobody would even know.” She’s found it safer to work at the club on the day shift, as night patrons are more rowdy, grabby and dangerous, she said. The Spectrum is not printing the name of the club where she works to protect her privacy. “The night shift is just not for me,” Sheehan said. “I’ve been hit by dudes on night shift. … There’s been a couple stabbings at night. It’s just not a scene that I want anything to do with.” There’s a predetermined line-up of dancers at the club, and when Sheehan’s ready, she tells the DJ and waits to be called on stage. Her style is like “a ‘90s rock and roll music video,” according to her clients, and she starts and ends her set in the same outfit, rather than performing a striptease.

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“I can flip off the stage into someone’s lap and do all types of flips and tricks on a chair and not a lot of girls do that. I think that’s a good moneymaker.” When Sheehan isn’t performing, she works the floor, talking to customers, getting tips and taking them to the back for private dances. “The hardest part for me wasn’t dancing on stage … it was honestly talking to people,” Sheehan said. “It’s a really weird situation, just having to approach someone. You eventually learn how to work people really well, you know the type of guy you’re dealing with and what their fantasy is, as we’re supposed to be these walking, living fantasies. That was really hard for me.” Now, she said she doesn’t mind being a walking fantasy, as long as she gets paid. “I get sick of it when I’m not making money. If I’m making a lot of money, though, I will be a fantasy all day.” She thinks the skill will pay off in the future, make her a more astute manager, gym owner and people reader. She also works bachelor parties, where she strips naked and earns more. She worries about seeing people she knows or family members, and having to perform while they watch. So far, it hasn’t happened. A few times, people have approached her asking if she works out at their gym. “I’m like, ‘No, that’s my twin, but we have the exact same tattoos,’” Sheehan laughed. “It’s really bad ‘cause these dudes really already stare at me and they just saw my vagina.” Sheehan said she doesn’t act like “your stereotypical stripper.” She doesn’t speak in high-pitched voices or call people daddy. She also won’t lie. She says she won’t tell a client “you’re so sexy,” “when they’re literally the ugliest thing.” She sees some of her coworkers put on a show and some who think they’re better than other dancers, but that’s not Sheehan’s style. “We’re all here getting naked for money. It’s really that simple.” She’s up front about her boundaries, and doesn’t let customers touch her much. “I don’t think I make enough money for that. … I am very straightforward with that because that’s something I do not f--k with and something I don’t have tolerance for.” Men have asked Sheehan to come home with them, some “full throttle go for the no-no square” during private dances, she said. Her response is clear. “Dude, I’m getting paid $15 a song right now. No. No.” Bouncers walk the dancers to their cars


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VindhYa BuruGuPaLLi / The SpecTrum

after work to make sure no one follows them. But in the club, Sheehan said she is assaulted verbally and physically every shift. People say “degrading bulls--t” just because they can, they try to grab her while she dances. This prompted Sheehan to conduct a “survey at the club,” where she asked the women she works with if they have been sexually assaulted on or off the job. Only one of 50 girls hadn’t.

‘Started to hate myself’

Sheehan was raped when she was 14. Her abuser was a friend-of-a-friend. He left her in an abandoned hotel room for 48 hours. The police found her, but she never reported the crime. Sheehan didn’t tell anyone about her assault until two years later, when she was

NEWS going on vacation with a friend and knew her abuser would be there. “I was just so young and I didn’t understand why it happened to me,” Sheehan said. “You kind of start to ask questions like, ‘Well what was I doing?’ –– even though that’s not the case, you know, it’s not the case –– ‘What was I doing that made that happen?’ Or ‘Did I give this guy the wrong idea? What did I say? Was I being promiscuous? Did I seem like I wanted it?’ Obviously I didn’t. But being so young and not really understanding, not even learning sex yet, it gives you a really distorted view of sexual relationships.” She started to hate herself; she didn’t look at herself the same. She spent her high school years struggling with bulimia and manic depression and self-harming. She once cut her thighs so deeply she was hospitalized. Sports became her outlet. She started using workouts as therapy. She remembers when she first started working out, scars covered her thighs and her “idol” in the gym approached her. “She came up to me and she was like ‘I just want to let you know’ –– and I started sobbing –– she said ‘I just want to let you know I’ve been through this and I have scars too. And I think you’re so inspiring

Monday, November 25 2019 | 7

coming in here wearing your short little shorts, not giving a f--k who sees because f--k what anyone else thinks,’” Sheehan said. This inspired her, and the more she worked out, the more she started to heal. Her fitness journey wasn’t always positive, and she used to pass out from overworking her food-deprived body. Now, she spends every day in the gym. Nick Patterson has been friends with Sheehan since third grade and has seen her through these hard times. He said Sheehan’s non-stop schedule keeps her from falling back into the negativity of her past. “She likes to keep herself busy,” Patterson said. “I think it’s a good way for her to not slip into that dark place that she’s been in for half of her life.” But her “dark times” didn’t end after high school. During Sheehan’s sophomore year at UB, her brother, Taylor, totaled his car. He drove into a tree going 70 mph under the influence of alcohol, and went into a coma instantly. “I couldn’t help but feel like some of it was my fault,” Sheehan said. “You know, I saw that he kind of had addiction problems and alcoholism and I would try to stop it but I went to my parents and he would just scheme his way out.” Taylor was in a coma for 31 days. Doctors said he was going to die, according to Sheehan, and if he lived, he would never be the same. “That was honestly probably one of the worst things I’ve ever experienced in my life,” Sheehan said. She spent every day in the hospital from noon to 9 p.m. “Every day she would find a way to come see me, no ifs, ands or buts,” Taylor said. “Luckily I am here today, but when I woke up, Haley was nothing but caring and never was angry at me for what I put

[When] I’m getting into my [Dodge] Challenger with my gold chains on, people are probably like, ‘Who the f--k does this b---h think she is?’

her and the rest of my family through.” Sheehan doesn’t dwell on her past trauma. It made her who she is today: fragile and fearless.

‘Keep s--t moving’

It’s a Tuesday after class. Sheehan lounges in a sweatsuit, two gold chains and black Timberlands that match her long, coffin-shaped, matte black nails. She looks intimidating, but when she talks, she feels like a best friend. “A lot of people probably think I’m too bold. A lot of people probably hate on me,” Sheehan said. “[When] I’m getting into my [Dodge] Challenger with my gold chains on, people are probably like, ‘Who the f--k does this b---h think she is?’” Sheehan is confident and admits she’d be nowhere without hard work, positivity and the social support which pulled her out of her darkest times. “I kind of just had this attitude that was like, that sucked but I’m not going to give a piece of my life to this person that did that,” Sheehan said. “I’m not going to sit here and cry all day or not continue with my life, my sexual life, whatever it is. I got to keep s--t moving.” Her plans include moving out of state and opening her own gym, training athletes who are just as dedicated to fitness as she is. Sheehan balances her roles enigmatically. And while she aspires to train others, she hopes her story can do the same for students who might feel fragile, just like her. Because her job may be untraditional, but her experiences are shared by many. “Like, yeah, I might have to deal with a--holes all day, but a lot of people have to deal with a--holes all day,” Sheehan said. “Imagine working at Tim Hortons, five o’clock in the morning on a Monday. God, you couldn’t pay me enough to do that. And when I think about that, I’m like, ‘Honestly, I don’t mind dancing.’” Email: jacklyn.walters@ubspectrum.com Twitter: @JacklynAWalters

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ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

8 | Monday, November 25 2019

friend. Without raising its voice above a whisper, “Bless the Weather” seamlessly blends folk, jazz, blues and psychedelia to satisfy a wide variety of listeners. This album is an absolute must listen for those seeking relaxation.

Best albums to chill out to and get through finals ALEX WHETHAM JUSTIN WOODMANCY ASST. ARTS EDITOR STAFF WRITER

It’s the end of the semester, final papers and projects are piling up and you’re ready to pull your hair out. Mental health is just as important as physical health, stress is never good and sometimes the best thing to do is just relax. Finding a way to relax is easier said than done, but music can easily help students destress before finals and is one of the most accessible stress-relieving tools. Thanks to the advent of streaming, music for stress relief is affordable, you can listen to it while you study and it won’t force you to break a sweat like a run would. Whether you decide to study, relax or even sleep to these, you should throw on these albums recommended by The Spectrum’s arts desk and let all your stress and anxiety wash away with the music.

courteSY of hYdra head recordS

Jesu “Conqueror” (2007)

Conquer your stress with this fantastically unique record that melds lush soundscapes with massive waves of guitars. Songs like “Transfigure,” “Stanlow” and “Medicine” completely envelop the listener in comforting blankets of synths, guitars and ethereal vocals, while tracks like “Weightless Horizontal” and “Brighteyes” induce a serene, trance-like state. “Conqueror,” at times, boasts riffs that rival the density of the heaviest bands around, but the album never betrays its beauty and calming atmosphere. Turn the volume up as loud as you can tolerate and give in to Jesu’s “Conqueror” to allow its otherworldly magic to take effect.

courteSY of iSland recordS

John Martyn “Bless the Weather” (1971)

British folk singer John Martyn’s tranquil voice sounds and feels like a gentle breeze on a cool summer’s night. “Bless the Weather” is the audio equivalent to a trip to the spa, as soothing melody after soothing melody melts away your worries. The music here is simply gorgeous and infinitely comforting - as if the songs were written specifically for you by a close

courteSY of rc recordS

Suffocation “Effigy of the Forgotten” (1991)

Serene and gentle music will certainly help alleviate your concerns, but sometimes you need to put on some seriously p----d-off jams and let it all out. Suffocation’s seminal death metal release “Effigy of the Forgotten” is the perfect rage-infused album for this. This record is 37 minutes of blissful brutality. It is even cited as the first album to feature slam riffs, and oh boy does it slam. By the end of the opening track “Liege of Inveracity,” you’ll be ready to run straight through a wall. After the closer “Jesus Wept,” that 10page English paper you’ve been stressing over will seem like an anthill compared to this mountain of riffage. Do yourself a favor and let Suffocation suffocate all of your stress and anxiety.

courteSY of 4ad recordS

Aldous Harding “Designer” (2019)

The second album by New Zealand folk artist Aldous Harding is one of the most meditative and relaxing albums of the decade. At times, it recalls the rootsy pop rock of “The Beatles” (aka “The White Album”), the third Velvet Underground album and even occasionally Bon Iver’s work. The instrumental palette is always tasteful, with acoustic and electric guitars, reserved drums, peppy basslines, strings and Harding’s soft vocals. Opener “Fix-

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ubspectrum.com ture Picture” is the clear highlight, but on tracks like “Zoo Eyes,” Harding shows off her impressive vocal range and ability to create some of the best music for just chilling out to. Plus, this album has some of the most peculiar but greatest music videos of all time attached to it.

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Aphex Twin “Selected Ambient Works 85-92” (1992)

Have you ever needed to get in the zone and just get a paper or study session over with? Have you ever needed a soundtrack to go along with it? Look no further than electronic artist Aphex Twin’s magnum opus. “Selected Ambient Works 85-92” is 74 minutes of hypnotic, cold and clinical music unlike anything that came before it. Contrary to the title, almost none of it is ambient music and is closer to early EDM if anything. It sounds like it was recorded in a cave converted into a lab where microbiologists perform some of the most complex experiments thinkable. It’s also relatively danceable, believe it or not. Go up to the fourth or fifth floor of Lockwood, get a desk, put this on your earbuds and watch your productivity skyrocket. It’s gotten me through more marathon paper sessions than I can count. If this album doesn’t satisfy your desire for productivity, try his slower and more disturbing 1994 album “Selected Ambient Works Volume II.” It’s almost three hours of creepy ambient music, but just as good for getting work done. Email: arts@ubspectrum.com


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SPORTS

10 | Monday, November 25 2019

Gabe Grant and Antwain Johnson embrace common obstacles after overcoming NCAA transfer rule JUSTIN WEISS ASST. SPORTS EDITOR

On the final night of the Bulls’ record-breaking 2018-19 season, the players walked off the court with their heads down and their hopes dashed. But nobody was more frustrated than Gabe Grant and Antwain Johnson, two

ment for the fifth time in six years. “We expect a lot of them this year,” Bulls head coach Jim Whitsell said. “I’m excited for them. Both of these guys can hit four or five threes a night, but along with it, we need them to do other things: leadership, rebounding and defense.” Throughout the 2018 season, Johnson and Grant were deployed on the scout team. There, they were tasked with mimicking the opponent during practice, in order to prepare the starters for what they would face during a real game. “They did individual work with us, but along with it, they would run with the team

Paul Hokanson / UB Athletics Gabe Grant dribbles the ball

members of the team who had no impact on the final outcome. During the 2018 men’s basketball season, Grant and Johnson were forced to watch games from the bench, despite being listed on the team’s roster. The NCAA transfer rule mandates that players spend an academic year “in residence” at the school they transfer to, with few exceptions. Grant and Johnson transferred in from different pockets of the country — the University of Houston and Middle Tennessee State — before joining forces as redshirt seniors. Both had already transferred once before, which meant they were playing for their third team in five years. “It was extremely hard for me to be patient,” Grant said. Today, Grant and Johnson embrace their common obstacles. They are expected to be key contributors to the 2019 Bulls, who seek to advance to the NCAA Tourna-

The Bulls host the Falcons on Black Friday JUSTIN WEISS ASST. SPORTS EDITOR

Coming off a 49-30 win over Toledo (65, 3-4 MAC), the Bulls return home to take on Bowling Green State University Friday. The Falcons are 3-8 following a 66-24 loss to Ohio Tuesday. Bowling Green went 1-3 in non-conference play, with losses to Kansas State, Louisiana Tech and now No. 16 Notre Dame, and a win over Morgan State. The 2019 Mid-American Conference Media Preseason Poll projected the Falcons to finish last in the MAC East. Running back Jaret Patterson amassed 192 yards and tied a MAC single-game record with 5 total touchdowns during Friday’s contest. Linebacker Matt Otwinowski snagged an interception and had a team-leading 10 total tackles. Buffalo is 6-5 entering the Bowling Green game. The Bulls defeated Robert Morris, Temple, Akron, Central Michigan, Eastern Michigan and Toledo. They lost to Penn State, Liberty, Miami (OH), Ohio and Kent State so far this season. The Bulls’ bowl hopes hang in the balance ahead of the BGSU matchup.

sets and get used to it,” Whitesell said. “That was a big part of their jobs, getting prepared for the games.” Johnson said the scout team didn’t slouch against anyone. “A lot of people don’t know, but the scout team used to win everyday at practice against the team last year,” he said, laughing. “That’s what was funny. We used to beat them everyday.” Grant and Johnson have no shortage of basketball experience. They both grew up playing basketball,

albeit in different parts of the country. Grant grew up in Chicago. Johnson was raised in Greenwood, FL. Coming out of high school, Johnson had one offer: Stetson University in DeLand, FL. “It’s a good school to get a degree from, but I felt that I wanted better for myself,” Johnson said. “I knew that I can adjust. So I was willing to take that junior college route and I knew I was going to grind to get where I wanted to go.” Johnson spent a season at Chipola College before taking his talents to Murfreesboro, TN, where he contributed to a tournament team. When head coach Kermit Davis left the team, Johnson started looking for his third school in four years. That’s how he found Buffalo. “It was really just a coaching change,” he said. “I came up here on a visit, and it was just genuine.” Grant grew up in Chicago, where — like Johnson — he excelled not only in basketball, but also in baseball. “I pretty much thought I was going to play Division-I baseball up until high school, when I got a little bit taller,” Grant said. “Basketball became more appealing to me and I started to run with that.”

Siddharth Bandhu / The Spectrum Senior guard Antwain Johnson shoots Bulls this season.

Here’s what to expect when the Bulls take on the Falcons Friday: Scot Loeffler, 3-8, first season at Bowling Green

The 2018 Falcons went 3-9 and finished in fifth place in the MAC East standings. Coach Mike Jinks was fired on Oct. 14 after a 1-6 record. He finished his BGSU tenure with a 7-24 record. Quarterback Jarret Doege completed 62.2% of his passes for 2,660 yards, 27 touchdowns and 12 interceptions. He transferred to West Virginia University, where he is currently the starting quarterback for the Mountaineers. Wide receiver Scott Miller was named second-team All-MAC after garnering 1,148 yards and 9 touchdowns on 71 receptions. He was a sixth-round pick by the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Running back Andrew Clair was named third-team All-MAC after gaining 702 rushing yards and 7 total touchdowns on the season. The Falcons averaged 354.0 yards per game, ranking at No. 105 in Division I-A. Bowling Green had four All-MAC selections, including offensive lineman Jack

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a

Coming out of high school, Grant had his “back against the wall,” with no DI basketball offers and a desire to compete at a higher level. He enrolled at Three Rivers Community College in Norwich, CT, where he stayed for two years, before transferring to the University of Houston. Under coach Kelvin Sampson, Grant “learned to find happiness in other things outside of basketball.” But earning playing time was a struggle for Grant, who averaged just 5.3 minutes per game. “I picked Houston because, at the time it was the place I thought I could grow and become a great basketball player,” he said. “Things just didn’t go that way.” In the summer of 2018, Buffalo assistant coach Bryan Hodgson spoke to Grant about transferring to UB. Grant remembers Hodgson pitching the idea of a “bigger opportunity” to achieve his goals. Grant appreciated the sincerity of the Bulls coaching staff, and decided to transfer in the following year. On Nov. 8, Grant and Johnson took the court for the first time in the regular season — not as members of the scout team, but as members of the team. As they took warmups on the Alumni Arena floor, they both felt chills. “It felt really good,” Johnson said. “It was nothing but a blessing from God,” Grant said. As they enter their final collegiate season, Grant and Johnson are determined to make the most of their opportunity. “Gabe is just like my blood brother,” Johnson said. “We have been through so much. We struggled together, and won together. So anything with me and him, we know we can look after each other and help each other grow.” Email: justin.weiss@ubspectrum.com

3-pointer during practice at Alumni Arena. Johnson has

Kramer and defensive back Marcus Milton. Milton had 3 interceptions and 46 total tackles. Defensive end Brandon Harris ranked at No. 12 in Division I-A with 131 total tackles, and added a sack and a forced fumble. The Falcons ranked at No. 115 in penalties per game and No. 106 in turnover margin in 2018 — both worrying figures. On Nov. 23, 2018, the Bulls defeated the Falcons 44-14 at Doyt Perry Stadium. Buffalo running backs Jaret Patterson and Kevin Marks combined for 4 rushing touchdowns, while wide receiver George Rushing added one of his own. Cornerback Tatum Slack contributed an interception.

Bowling Green has three wins, including one over highly-favored Toledo. Quarterback Darius Wade emerged as the starter during training camp, but his tenure was short-lived. He completed 59% of his passes for 675 yards, 3 touchdowns and 3 interceptions before he was replaced by Grant Loy. Through 10 games, Loy has completed 57.1% of his passes for 1,132 yards, 6 touchdowns and 11 interceptions. The

scored

41

points for the

Falcons continue to look for a long-term solution at quarterback, and are unsure if Loy is the answer. Bowling Green had five players named to the Athlon Sports MAC Football 2019 All-Conference Team, including offensive lineman Lorenzo Taborn, defensive lineman David Konowalski and safety Jerry McBride. The offense has been even less effective this season, averaging just 302.4 yards per game. Bowling Green hasn’t had a single player break 700 yards rushing or receiving. Wide receiver Quintin Morris has been the highest-used target, hauling in 54 passes for 614 yards and 4 touchdowns. Linebacker Brandon Perce ranks at No. 12 in Division 1-A with 100 total tackles. The Falcons have allowed 37.6 points per game, ranking at No. 124 in Division 1-A.

The Bulls became bowl-eligible with a win over Toledo last Wednesday. But with 64 teams already qualified for bowl games and another 30 or so nearing the six-win mark, the Bulls will likely need to beat Bowling Green to get into postseason play. With Patterson and Marks coming out of the backfield, the Bulls should give the Falcons fits all night. Expect the Bulls to come out on top. Email: justin.weiss@ubspectrum.com


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