Peace of Mind, 2018

Friday, July 20, 2018

Caughman-Harman Funeral Homes, Dunbar Funeral Homes, Your Local Dignity Memorial Providers Caughman-Harman Funeral and Elmwood Funeral Home and Cremation Homes Services See our ad on the back cover

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FRIDAY JULY 20 2018

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What it means to ‘get your affairs in order’ No one likes to think about dying, but planning for the worst can make a big difference for your family in death or in an emergency.

Consider two situations (edited for space) posed by the National Institute on Aging: “Ben has been married for 47 years, but since his stroke, Ben is not able to walk or talk. His wife, Shirley, feels overwhelmed. She has no idea what bills should be paid or when they are due. Ben always took care of family money matters, and he never talked about the details with Shirley. No one but Ben knew that his life insurance policy was in a box in the closet or that the car title and deed to the house were filed in his desk drawer. Ben never expected that his wife would have to take over.

His lack of planning has made a tough job even tougher for Shirley.

“Louise, 80, lives alone.

One night, she fell in the kitchen and broke her hip.

She spent a week in the hospital and two months in a rehabilitation nursing home. Even though her son lives across the country, he was able to pay her bills and handle her Medicare questions right away.

That’s because, several

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years ago, Louise and her son made a plan about what he should do in case Louise had a medical emergency. Long before she fell, Louise put all her important papers in one place and told her son where to find them. She made sure Medicare and her doctor had written permission to talk with her son about her health and insurance claims.”

ORGANIZE YOUR DOCUMENTS Make sure important papers and copies of legal documents are in a safe place and that a trusted family member or friend (or a attorney) knows where to find them.

What are “important papers”?

Important personal records include your Social Security card, proof of legal residence, birth certificates, death certificates, certificates of divorce, proof of citizenship, certificates of adoption, employment records, education records, military records, and legal documents.

Important financial records include sources of income and assets – employment, pension, IRAs, 401(k)s, etc. – as well as Social Security and Medicare or Medicaid information, insurance information,

Resources AARP: 1-888-687-2277; member@aarp.org; www.aarp.org CaringInfo: 1-800-658-8898; caringinfo@nhpco.org; www.caringinfo.org Eldercare Locator: 1-800-677-1116; www.eldercare.gov National Elder Law Foundation: 1-520-881-1076; info@nelf.org; www.nelf.org National Institute on Aging: 1-800-222-2225; niaic@nia.nih.gov; www.nia.nih.gov South Carolina Lieutenant Governor’s Office on Aging: 803-734-9900; scaccess@aging.sc.gov; www.scaccesshelp.org ...................................................................................................................

RANDY BISHOP Dallas Morning News file illustration

names of your banks and account numbers, a copy of your most recent income tax return, mortgage and debt information, liability information like property tax, the deed to your home, car title and registration, and credit and debit card names and numbers.

Your important paper file should also include a list of the names and contact information of your close family members, religious contacts, close friends, doctors, attorneys and financial advisers, as

well as a list of medications you take regularly.

Some of your important papers may be in a safe deposit box, so make sure someone knows its location and where to find a key – and keep copies of appropriate documents in your file at home.

EASE THE WAY FOR A CAREGIVER Give permission in advance for your doctor or attorney to talk with a caregiver as needed.

There may be questions

about your care, a bill, or a health insurance claim.

You can also notify Medicare, your insurance company, a credit card company and your bank who that caregiver may be.

CONSIDER LEGAL DOCUMENTS Legal documents you may need to consider include wills and trusts, which let you name the person or organization who receives your money and property after you die; advance directives, which let you make arrangements for your care if you become sick; a general power of attorney, which lets someone act on your behalf while you are able to make your own deci-

sions; or a durable power of attorney, which allows someone to act on your behalf for any legal task, even if you become unable to make decisions.

There are two kinds of advance directives: A living will states what kind of care you do or don’t want. For example, you can specify that you do want CPR if your heart stops, or that you do not want a feeding tube under any circumstances. A durable power of attorney for health care lets you name the person you want to make medical decisions for you if you can’t make them yourself.

An attorney can help you set up any of those.

— NATIONAL INSTITUTE ON AGING

Peace of Mind A product of

RODNEY MAHONE President and Publisher MORGAN BONNER Ad Production Manager, Carolinas

RICH CANAZARO Vice President of Advertising Operations, Carolinas REBEKAH LEWIS HALL Special Projects Coordinator

On the cover Illustration by Louie Lanford. . ...............................................................................

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Here’s everything you need to know about Social Security survivors’ benefits Social Security Administration

The loss of the family wage earner can be devastating, both emotionally and financially.

Social Security helps by providing income for the families of workers who die. In fact, 98 of every 100 children could get benefits if a working parent dies. Social Security pays more benefits to children than any other federal program.

It is important that you are aware of these benefits in planning for the financial security of your family. In fact, the value of the survivor’s benefits you have under Social Security is probably more than the value of your individual life insurance.

You should know who can get benefits and how much.

Your family should know how to apply for survivor’s benefits and how work or other sources of income may affect the benefits they receive.

WHO CAN GET SURVIVORS’ BENEFITS? Widows or widowers may be able to get full benefits at full retirement age. The full retirement age for survivors is age 66 for people born from 1945 to 1956.

In addition, the full retirement age will gradually increase to age 67 for people born in 1962 or later. A widow or widower can get reduced benefits as early as age 60.

If a surviving spouse is

disabled, benefits can begin as early as age 50.

Survivors can get benefits at any age if they take care of a child younger than age 16 or disabled, who is receiving Social Security benefits.

(See: www.ssa.gov/ planners/survivors/ survivorchartred.html).

Benefits paid to a surviving divorced spouse won’t affect the benefit rates for other survivors getting benefits on the worker’s record. If the surviving divorced mother or father, with the worker’s child under age 16 or disabled in their care, the benefit can affect the benefits of others on the record.

Unmarried children, younger than age 18 (or up to age 19 if they’re attending elementary or secondary school full-time), can also get benefits. Your children can get benefits at any age if they were disabled before age 22 and remain disabled.

Under certain circumstances, we can also pay benefits to your stepchildren, grandchildren, step grandchildren, or adopted children (visit www.socialsecurity.gov for more information).

Dependent parents can get benefits if they’re 62 or older. (For your parents to qualify as dependents, you would have had to provide at least half of their support.)

Should you already receive benefits as a wife or husband on your spouse’s record we will change your payment to survivor

Check your Social Security Statement to see an estimate of survivor’s benefits we could pay. It also shows an estimate of your retirement and disability benefits, and provides other important information. Create a ‘my Social Security’ account online to review your Statement.

JAMES FORREST Dallas Morning News file illustration

benefits. If you receive benefits only on your own record, we will check to see if you can get more as a widow or widower. We’ll need proof of death of your spouse.

How much a family receives depends on the average lifetime earnings of the deceased. Contact us soon after the death of the worker because, in some cases, benefits may not be retroactive.

Usually, you can’t get widow’s or widower’s benefits if you remarry before age 60. Remarriage after age 60 (or age 50 if you’re disabled) won’t prevent you from getting benefit payments based on your former spouse’s

work. And at age 62 or older, you can get benefits on your new spouse’s work, if those benefits would be higher.

WORK AND SURVIVOR BENEFITS If one works while getting Social Security survivor’s benefits and he or she is younger than full retirement age, benefits may be reduced if earnings exceed certain limits.

The full retirement age for survivors is 66 for people born in 1945-1956.

The full retirement age will gradually increase to age 67 for people born in 1962 or later. To find out what the earnings limits are this year and how

earnings above those limits reduce your Social Security benefits, read How Work Affects Your Benefits (Publication No. 05-10069).

There’s no earnings limit beginning with the month you reach full retirement age.

Also, your earnings will reduce only your benefits, not the benefits of other family members.

HOW MUCH ARE BENEFITS? How much your family can get from Social Security depends on your average lifetime earnings. The more you earned, the more their benefits will be.

ONLINE MY SOCIAL SECURITY ACCOUNT You can now easily set up a secure online my Social Security account ( www.socialsecurity.gov/ myaccount ). This allows you to access your Social Security Statement to check your earnings and get your benefit estimates.

You can use your online my Social Security account to request a replacement Social Security number card (available in some states and the District of Columbia). If you receive benefits, you can also: A Get your benefit verification letter.

A Change your address and phone number.

A Request a replacement Medicare card.

A Request a replacement SSA-1099 or SSA-1042S for tax season.

A Start or change your direct deposit.

For more information on this important Social Security protection, visit our website www.socialsecurity.gov or call 1-800772-1213 or at our TTY number, 1-800-325-0778, if you are deaf or hard of hearing. You also can visit your local Social Security office.

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Why Preplanning is Essential.

The best time to plan your final arrangements is now. Imagine your daughter coming home from a date on Wednesday declaring she had met ‘the one’ and she wants the perfect wedding on Saturday? Of course, that wouldn’t be reasonable. You would tell her that you need time to plan such an important event. Even if you attempted this feat, because of the significance and elevated emotional state of all involved, something would be over looked and the end result would not be as she’d hoped. Disappointment would be an unfortunate part of her wedding memories.

We are a society of planners. Have you ever benefited from career planning, financial planning, travel planning, or tax planning? How about simple meal planning for the week? Of course you have. Here’s a simple ques-

tion: why do so many of us ignore the fact that we will one day pass on from this life? Just like the wedding example, our celebration of life needs proper time and attention to ensure our legacy lives on with those left behind.

When someone dies, similar to planning a wedding, emotions and stress levels are at an all-time high. When, where, how and costs are extremely important. Why wouldn’t they be? Often, death occurs without warning. Consider another example: a brief 24 hours ago Harold and Alice sat down for Sunday dinner with their neighbors. The next morning Harold suffered a fatal heart attack. Alice was completely caught off guard. In fact, the dinner conversation the evening prior included their upcoming Alaskan cruise. Alice will never set sail with Harold. Instead she must

do something she has never done before: plan her husband’s funeral. Sadly, they never talked about their final arrangements.

Have you considered how many people’s lives you affect? Are you a mother, father, son, daughter, spouse or sibling? One day, whether we like it or not, our loved ones will no longer have the opportunity to call to inquire how our week went, ask for our advice, or to simply say hello.

Planning for the inevitable is essential. Not only are you able to ease the emotional and financial burdens on your family, you also ensure that your final wishes will be followed. Join us at George Funeral Home to learn how to give your family peace of mind, financial security and a celebration that will reflect what you mean to them.

• Helps you navigate the important decisions now, so your loved ones don’t have to.

• Provides you with peace of mind knowing your wishes will be taken care of.

• Protects your family from unforeseen financial inflation and costs.

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‘‘

Many thanks to Mr. Maddux and the staff at Thompsons in West Columbia. Within less than 36 hours, they handled all arrangements and executed an evening visitation followed by a next-day service, and all that it entailed. All was done with grace, dignity and patience. Thank you again for smoothing out the edges of a rough period in our lives.

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— MARSHA B.

‘‘

From the first phone call to the delivery of the death certificates, everyone was kind, professional and courteous. The funeral and everything associated with it was first class, top notch and deeply appreciated by my family and me. When it comes to funeral services in the future, we will continue to use Thompson Funeral Home. Everything we experienced was made better by the team you have there.

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— ED LUNDEEN

‘‘

I arrived at Thompson Funeral Home at Greenlawn clueless of what I needed to do when my husband passed away. I wasn’t familiar with making arrangements for a funeral or my husband’s faith’s funeral practices.

Rob guided me through the process and the funeral was absolutely seamless. With his guidance and assurance every detail was handled and I could focus on my family and grieving my husband’s death.

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— BARBARA CONWAY

This is why we do what we do.

West Columbia 200 State Street (803) 791-0650

Lexington 4720 Augusta Road (803) 996-1023

Greenlawn Memorial Park 845 Leesburg Road (803) 776-1092

www.thompsonsfuneral.com

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How does a hospice pastor handle being surrounded with death? He cries

BY MARK BREDHOLT

Special to The State

“Tears are the noble language of the eye.”

– Robert Herrick (1591-1674), English poet and cleric

Death, loss and pain have been three of my closest companions throughout my 64 years.

In my last two years of high school and my first two years of college, I worked for a small, country funeral home. Later, the twists and turns of life brought me into the unique world of hospice care, where I spent 34 years as a chaplain. I have concluded my formal ties to hospice and have transitioned into being on-call to local funeral homes when a family needs help and guidance with a funeral or memorial service.

On hundreds of occasions, I have been asked the same question over and over again. How do you handle all that death?

The answer is a fairly short one. I cry.

My tears have been a healing balm and the gift of restoring balance and understanding for the world I must navigate.

I am not sure when this gift arrived. I remember crying from watching movies like “Old Yeller,” “The Diary of Anne Frank” and “To Kill a Mockingbird” in my childhood. President Kennedy’s death and funeral was so sad and scary to my brief 10 years of life, but the gift of my tears connected me to all the other people who were crying, and I felt better that I was not alone in my grief.

I have a question that I have been working on for many years

now. Have you ever noticed that when people cry they almost always apologize to the people who are present in that holy moment. Why? Part of the answer is that people keep telling other people to be strong when they are feeling everything but strong. A big part of our culture believes that crying is weakness. I have learned to tell people it is better to be healthy than to be strong.

Tears keep us healthy and human.

Tears connect us to other special gifts as well. Tears honor truth and love in our relationships, and I am pretty sure the world could use more of those two virtues.

I still cry for a little boy I served in my early years of being a hospice chaplain. He was 8 years old and was dying of AIDS. He was living in a foster home with a God-sent loving and wise mother.

One day he asked me to help him plan his funeral. It was a hard moment – and a task I was not ready for. He insisted; he was not going to let the matter go.

We talked about what he knew of funerals and what he wanted in his service.

He knew the song he wanted (“Jesus Loves Me”), the three people he wanted to speak and the Bible story of Jesus holding and blessing children (Mark 10).

I kept looking at his beautiful eyes and listening to the childlike voice who spoke with such grace about the service we were planning.

I was exhausted and felt the planning was over, but he had one more question for me.

He wanted to know if I could get him a white suit to be buried in. I knew that I could probably get him 10 white suits. At that

MCCLATCHY file illustration

moment the inner child who lived in me wanted to know what was so important about having a white suit.

He told me of his losses – which included the death of his mother, an absentee father, and other people who stopped coming around because he had AIDS. He then explained to me that he wanted a white suit because everyone in heaven wears white, and for once, he just going to be

like everyone else and have a place to belong.

I nodded without words, gave him a hug and told him not to worry. The mist of tears began to form, and by the time I reached my car, the baptism was complete.

I cried at the funeral. I cried at the burial. I cry 29 years later, every time I pay respects at his grave or tell his story.

And every tear is my way of remembering that I am grateful

for all the love he shared with me and that his complete spirit travels with me every single day.

May all people live their life in such a way to be worthy of tears from the hearts that love us best.

Bredholt is a longtime hospice pastor who has helped more than 25,000 patients and their family members deal with death. A version of this essay first appeared in the 2017 edition of Peace of Mind.

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3 common ways your Social Security checks can increase after retirement

BY ROSE MARY BUEHLER

Social Security Regional Commissioner in Atlanta

ou made the choice, and now you are happily retired.

You filed online for your Social Security benefits. They arrive each month in the correct amount exactly as expected.

But, did you ever wonder if your Social Security check could increase?

Once you begin receiving Buehler benefits, there are three common ways benefit checks can increase: a cost of living adjustment (COLA); additional work; or an adjustment at full retirement age if you received reduced benefits and exceeded the earnings limit.

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COST OF LIVING ADJUSTMENT The COLA is the most commonly known increase for Social Security payments. We annually announce a COLA, and there’s usually an increase in the Social Security and Supplemental Security Income (SSI) benefit amount people receive each month.

By law, federal benefit rates increase when the cost of living rises, as measured by the Department of Labor’s Consumer Price Index (CPI-W).

More than 66 million Americans saw a 2.0 percent increase in their So-

cial Security and SSI benefits in 2018. For more information on the 2018 COLA, visit www.social security.gov/cola.

STOCKBYTE Getty Images

ADDITIONAL WORK AFTER RETIREMENT Social Security uses your highest 35 years of earnings to figure your benefit amount when you sign up for benefits. If you work after you begin receiving benefits, your additional earnings may increase your payment.

If you had fewer than 35 years of earnings when we figured your benefit, you will replace a zero earnings year with new

earnings. If you had 35 years or more, we will check to see if your new year of earnings is higher than the lowest of the 35 years (after considering indexing).

ADJUSTMENT AT FULL RETIREMENT AGE We check additional earnings each year you work while receiving Social Security. If an in-

crease is due, we send a notice and pay a one-time check for the increase and your continuing payment will be higher.

Maybe you chose to receive reduced Social Security retirement benefits while continuing to work. You made the choice to take benefits early, but at a reduced rate. If you exceeded the allowable earnings limit

and had some of your benefits withheld, we will adjust your benefit once you reach full retirement age. We will refigure your payment to credit you for any months you did not receive payments. Your monthly benefit will increase based on the crediting months you receive.

You can find additional information about working and your benefit at

www.socialsecurity.gov/ pubs/EN-05-10077.pdf.

Retirement just got more interesting since you learned about potential increases to monthly payments.

Social Security has been securing your today and tomorrow for more than 80 years with information and tools to help you achieve a successful retirement.

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FRIDAY JULY 20 2018