PATTA-LOVU
About the cover 2
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
3
PATTA-LOVU
4
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
5
PATTA-LOVU
6
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
7
PATTA-LOVU
Table of contents 8
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Table of contents 9
PATTA-LOVU
10
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Ti Panagayat Ni Chio Iti sumuno nga agsapa Panpanunotek isuna Inton agsingising iti init sadiay daya Dagus agturong sadiay balay da Ket sadiay sidong na Naduma-duma innak marikrikna Awan pulos sairo no di ket puro rag-o Isuna’t mangpunpunno iti aginaldaw ko Ilabutab konto Sadiay let-ang iti panagayat ko Uray pay no siak payla’t agtutubo Panagayat ko kenkuana’t agpayso
David Cantu (@minimal.line.art)
Isuna’t innak ay-ayaten Isuna’t kaniak inyeg ti panawen Awan to pulos babalawen Gapu’t naipadto naturposen Isunto’t innak laeng dungdungwen Inggana’t panagangis ko’t agsardingen Dik to pulos palidayen No di ket isuna’t paragsaken.# 11
PATTA-LOVU
Papuri't Pagsamba Julia BeeF Dadating akong puno ng luha, Dala ang puso kong walang kapag-a pag-asa. Lalapit Sayo habang nagpapakumbaba, Magsisimulang Sayo'y mananampalataya. Mga instrumentong pinuspos Mo'y nagtugtugan, Mga mang-aawit na tinawag Mo'y nagsikantahan. Sinimulan kong ipikit ang aking mga mata, Tinuon ko Sa’yo ang sarili buhat ang bigat na dala-dala. Habang umaawit ng Iyong salita, Bigla kong nadarama ang 'Yong presensya. Pinakita Mo na totoo ang Iyong salita, na lahat ng bagay ay may pag-asa. Maging sa pinakamaliit na bagay, pait nito'y kaya Mong gawing makulay. Habang lumalakas ang mga kanta, ganon din naman ang pagbuhos Mo ng pagpapala. Nararamdaman ang pagmamahal Mong napakaganda, Pinalalakas ang loob kong tumayo at lumaban pa. Sa pagpuri at pagsamba, dito Mo sakin pinaaalala, na lagi kitang kasama..#
12
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Itak Julievic D. Palting Pagkatha ng tulang ekphrasis (Obra ni Fernando Amorsolo sa pagtatanggol sa dangal ng isang babaeng Pilipina noong Ikalawang Digmaan)
Itak na hawak ng nagkukuyom na bisig Matulis Matalim kung itaga Walang mintis. Paang nakasingkad handang magtanggol Nagbabantay Nakatanod sa porselanang kaibig-ibig. Dingding na may sabit isang telang puti Kung hablutin nang pilit Halimuyak nitong bango Mananamlay, maglalaho.
Masdan ang damit sa pinta ng hiyas na hapis Nilagas Niyurakan saka niladlad Huwag bahiran ng dahas nitong aba kong pinta Ihagod ang mata sa bandang ibaba Tumingkad ang kulay Kumapal ang tintang ipinahid sa saplot ng birhen na aagawan ng pinakaiingatang kayamanan ng mapang-alipustang dayuhan.# 13
PATTA-LOVU
Dagil ng Daluyong sa Karagatan Leidi Pagulayan Isang lipunang sinlawak ng karagatan,E Ang mga alon ay malayang nagsayaw sa kawalan; Sadomasokismo, Sarili’y hinayaang magpaalon-alon, Magpalamon, magpakahon, Sa mapuwersang paghamon ng sadomasokismo. Linasap ang halumigmig ng labi Sintamis, singkinis ng kapipitas na aratilis. Sarap sa kanyang bibig ay namutawi.
Ngunit sandali, Karagata’y nabalot ng paghikbi, Pagtangis, pagkainis Bakit hindi na maalis?
Karagatang malakristal ang tubig sa kaputian, Ngayo’y simpula ng dugo sa digmaan. Sadomasokismo, Nagpatianod sa sarap Huwad na kagalaka’y nalasap, Ngayo’y gulilat sa kagyat na paghihirap. Karima-rimarim na tukso’y nararapat puksain, Anayad na alon ay muling apuhapin. Oo, sadomasokismo ang puno’t dulo, Ngunit hindi pa rito nagtatapos, ang muling pagpinta, pagpapaganda ng karagatang minsa’y naging malaya.#
14
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Ang Makata Sa Daan Janela Villar (Para sa mga makata sa iba't ibang lugar lalo na sa mga daan) Sumulat ka Gamit ang plumang paputol-putol Ang tinta At papel ng kapatid mo Sa unang baiting Na ang guhit,ang gaspang Ay kinapatid na Ang kalyo ng iyong kamaong Pinagod Ng araw-araw na gawain Sa daan Malayang lumabas Ang malamyos na mga kataga At umasawa Sa mumurahing papel At habang madulas Na idinidikta, Kumakawala, Sa isip mo Ang makatang salita, Ay malupit na humampas Ang hanging Dala ng mga sasakyan Na hindi sinanto Ang mumurahing papel Na nilukuban mo Ng iyong malayang damdamin
Hampas, Sulat, Lumilikha ng kagandahang Hindi nakikita Ng mga nagdaraan At sa mga huling salita Na tatapos sa iyong likha Ay malupit Na dumating Humampas Ang mas malayang hangin Ng mga sasakyang Nagdaraan At inilipad, isinama Hindi sinanto Ang manipis, Magaspang, Na mumurahing papel Ng kapatid mo Sa unang baitang.# 15
PATTA-LOVU
Kahapon Na Tila Ba'y Ngayon Avie Unang buwan ng taon Inaasahan ay pagbangon, Ngunit parang mali ang panahon Katulad lamang ata ito ng kahapon. Kasiyahan ay inaasahan, Kaya kinabukasan ay binuksan, Datapwat mali ata yaong pintong nabuksan, Parang kahapon ay binabalikan. Ninanais na pagbabago, Mahirap na atang makamit nang husto, Bagamat matatag ang puso, Hindi maalis sa isip ang takot at paninibago. Pangamba sa isip ay napuno, Tila ba para itong baldeng matino, Napuno na ng walang hinto-At unti-unti nang naglalaho. Ang puso'y naiwang wasak, Dahil gustong pagbabago hindi na hawak-Ng mga kamay nating puro na putik, Ng kahapong naiwang pumipitik.#
16
Noon O Ngayon? Reynito Guzman Para bang ang bilis umikot nitong mundo, Sa mga bagay na tinutuklas dito ng mga tao, Teknolohiya ay panay din ang mga pagbabago, Wala ngang katapusan at tuloy-tuloy ito. Sa telebisyon, kompyuter, sa mga telepono, Kay dalas magpalit ng mga modelo, Sa mga bagong labas ang may pera ay nalilito, Ano ba ang bibilhin sa mga gadget na ito? Sa pag-usbong ng teknolohiya, marami ang nagsusulputan, unti-unti nang napapalitan ng mas modernong kagamitan itong mga gamit na ating nakagisnan na, Sa panahon ngayon, ano na nga ba ang mas mainam? Itong noon? O itong ngayon? Tradisyonal na midya ba? O ang new media?
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Ang mga pagbabago ay napakabilis, Dahil hindi lang tao ang nag-iisip, I-load lang sa computer gawin ang ilang click, Ayun! sabay tingin basahin lang nang maigi O, diba napakabilis? Lahat ng bagay ay magagawa na natin, Kahit tayo pa ay nakapikit, Hayaang nakabukas ang washing machine, Iyong mga labahin, kusang matutuyo rin, kahit ikaw pa ay nakaidlip. Television, billboards, radio, magasin at iba pang mga print media Mga unang nakagawiang gamitin upang isiwalat sa madla ang iba’t ibang kuda, Kuda dito, kuda diyan, kuda kung saan saan, mga impormasyon at mga patalastas Sa paglipas nga ng panahon mga kagamita’y kay bilis umusbong, Maraming nagbago at marami ring naglaho Ang mga batang naglalaro noon ng tumbang preso sa kanto, Ngayo’y tila silang lahat ay nasa kwarto, naglalaro, ngunit ang kanilang kalaro ay hindi na tao, kundi gawa ng imahinasyon ng ibang tao Lumitaw ang internet, social media, podcast, YouTube at marami pang barayti ng mga ito, Nasa makabagong panahon na nga tayo ngayon, New media ika nga, na kadalasang gamit sa internet upang makangalap, magsiwalat ng hitik na mga impormasyon
Sa kabilang banda, luma man o bago ang iyong dala, Alin man sa dalawa, pareho lang naman itong may maganda at hindi mabuting dala. Sa pagiging moderno ng mundo, tunay ngang maraming bagay ay napadali na nga nito, Ngunit ito din ang umubos sa oras ng bawat isa, at siyang nagsisilbi na ngang pamantayan ng maraming madla, na kung minsan pa'y nakapang aabuso na ng kapwa Nawa’y gumising na nga, ito’y likha para sayo sa kanya, at sa kanila, nawa’y magamit nang lubos, wasto, wais, at kanais-nais, sa tunay nga nitong gamit.#
17
PATTA-LOVU
Lapida Janela Villar Sa gitna ng daan Mo natagpuan Ang huli mong pahingahan Siguro’y kalagitnaan ng gabi Nang ika’y tumakas O tumawid Tinahak ang malaking landas At naiisantabi Na kailanma’y di umakma Marahil may batang umiyak Sa iyong liit Sa iyong pagkawala Siguro’y buong tiwala O dalagitang lumuha Mong tinalunton Habang lulan ng sasakyan Ang dayuhang patag Sa pagkakakita Upang tumawid, makarating Sa iyong duguang bangkay Sa kabila Na unti-unti, At siguro’y gulat kang Sa pagdaan ng araw Napatingin Ay hindi man lang naihukay Sa mapanukso At sa kalye ay tumatak, Ngunit mapanganib Lumimbag, Na ilaw Kasama ang dugo at laman mong Ng sasakyang dumating Nagsilbing tinta Na siyang tumapos Na sa pagdaan ng araw Sa payak mong buhay Ay unti-unting mawawala Na isang hayop-Pagkat daraanan, sasagasaan, Maliit Mawawala ang alaala sa kalsada Liban sa maninipis Na balahibong Kikilanlan Sa maliit na pusang Naparam Sa daan.# 18
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Aking Prinsesa Michael Angelo P. Ogayon Sa lahat ng nakilala, Ikaw ang pinapantasya. Wala nang hihigit pa Sa ‘yo aking prinsesa. Mga matang nangungusap, Walang ibang pangarap. Bawat oras na magkasama tayong dalawa, Ikaw na pala. Ikaw na pala. Ayaw magpaawat, Kasama sa aking pangarap. Ika'y isang bulaklak Masamyo sa lahat.
David Cantu (@minimal.line.art)
Cindang ang pangalan Kasama habang buhay Gumuho man ang mundo Ikaw parin ang nasa puso. Ikaw na pala, Ikaw na pala, Ikaw na pala Aking prinsesa.#
19
PATTA-LOVU
Bakla Ako Secofiven II Wala na talagang matino sa mundo Puro panghuhusga na lang ang ginagawa ng tao, Pati pa mandin ba laman ng dalawang hita ko Papakialaman pa ng mga chismosa at chismoso. Bandilang bahaghari ipagpunyaging iwagayway, Ito ang tunay kong kulay, Ano ba naman kung malaman mong bakla ako? Kahit konting respeto naman sana galing sa inyo.
Nagkakagusto ako sa lalaki, Pano ba naman kasi naturingan akong malandi, Sana sa pagkakataong ito matanggap niyo ako, Iyong kayo na walang magbabago. Ang hirap sa sitwasyon ko na baka mahusgahan, Pero ang hangad ko ay tunay na kaligayahan, Iyong kendeng na maisasama kahit saan, Ang sakit-sakit kasi, di ko mapigilan. Baklang walang kwenta, Baklang salot, Baklang ‘di maipagmamalaki, Mga dahilan na takot kong di maikubli. Ano nabigla kayo? Ito ako... ang tunay na ako, Kahit na walang nakakaintindi basta't alam ko sa sarili ko ang hanap ko, Kagaya ko sa kabilang pagkatao ko.
20
Isang putol na tabla Hindi na siya makahinga Tigilan ang panghuhusga, tigilan ang tawa Nang maramdaman kong ako ay malaya. Nagtataka kayo kung bakit ang tatag ko Ito ang rebelasyon na ‘di malilimutan Ang kwento na ‘di maglalaon, Ni Fifth Solomon.#
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Anong Sa ’kin? Cindy M. Dalupang Ano nga bang sa’kin? Kung ‘yong taong akala ko kasama ko na hanggang dulo, e nasa ‘yo Kung ‘yong mga kamay na hawak ko habang tumatakbo patungong kawalan ay hawak mo na rin. ‘Yung yakap na kailangan ko sa panahong bigo ako ay siyang tumutuyo na rin sa mga luha sa mata mo. Ano nga bang sa ’kin? Kung ‘yong mga ngiti at tingin ay sa’yo na napadpad Kung pati mga pangako at pangarap namin sa isa't isa ay kayo na rin ang tumutupad Ano nga bang sa’kin? Ako dapat ‘yon, kami dapat ‘yon. Masakit sobra, pero wala akong magawa Ngayong nasa’yo na siya, ibigay mo sa kanya ‘yong mga bagay na hindi niya makita sa’kin, Yung dahilan kung bakit siya nasa’yo. Alam kong tapos na ang kwento namin at wala nang sa’kin. Isa lang ang sagot, kasi nasa’yo na siya#
Pag-ibig na Vulca Seal Reca Jane Saladino Ako ay umibig, ngunit nasaktan, Ako ay nagmahal, pinaasa lang naman Ano bang dapat kong malaman? Para ikaw ay kaya kong pakawalan? Sa bawat sulyap at ngiti, Mga tingin na mapagkunwari, Bawat sandali'y may halaga Basta ba't ika'y aking nakikita.
Panakip-butas na iyong sinabi, Mundo ko'y biglang nahati. Walang magawa sa aking sarili, Dahil galing ito sa iyong labi. Ngunit sa mga oras na ako'y lumalayo Ikaw naman ang umaakit sa puso ko Sadyang ganito ba pag nagmahal ang isang tao? Gagawin lahat, ikamatay man niya ito? Subalit isa ka palang mapanlinlang At puso'y sinugatan mo lang Bakit sa isang kisap mata Nawala kang bigla sinta? Paano ba makalilimot? Saan makakukuha ng gamot? Maalis pa ba ang sakit? At ang iniwan mong pait?#
21
PATTA-LOVU David Cantu (@minimal.line.art)
Malaya Ka Na Chris Ianphil Mateo Paalam sa mga araw na ika'y kasama. Paalam sa mga araw na tayo lang dapat dalawa: Dahil bukas, sa aki'y mawawala na, Dahil bukas, sa aking paggising ako na lang at wala ng kasama Ganon naman lagi, 'di ba? Sa liwanag ika' y kasama Ngunit sa dilim ika'y maglalaho na Ganon na lang ba kadaya ang tadhana? Kung kailan tayo masaya, Doon ka naman mawawala? Kung kailan akala ko ikaw na Doon naging mali lahat ng akala.#
Mag-isang Maghihintay Chris Ianphil Mateo David Cantu (@minimal.line.art)
22
Saan nga ba ang tagpuang Ipinangako ni Bathala? Saan nga ba lulugar ang mga tulad ko na patuloy umaasa? Dahil, Mahal, kung wala ring kasiguraduhan ang lahat ng ating ginagawa, Mas nanaisin kong bitawan ang mga sinambit kong salita. Dahil, Mahal, mahirap kapag ako na lang Ang naghihintay sa tagpuan na dapat tayo ang magkaagapay.#
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Sabihin Mo Sirin Kasalanan ko bang ikaw ang napili? Kasalanan ko bang mahalin ka nang sobra-sobra? Sabihin mo Sabihin mo kung tama pa ba, Na ako'y umasa at maghabol? Sabihin mo na Upang pighati na aking nadarama ay maibsan man lang. Siguro nga, hindi ako yung babaeng inilagay sa ‘yong mundo Taken for granted lang ako sa’yo Option, hindi priority Oo, aaminin ko sobra ng sakit Pero ikaw yung sakit na handa kong tiisin, At kung hindi talaga ako para sa’yo May hiling lang ako, Na sana kahit pansamantala, Isang araw lang, Ikaw ay maging akin.#
23
PATTA-LOVU
Balang Araw Jenel Mae Castillo Apat na letra, Dalawang Pantig Isang salita Madalas kong dasal, sana’y makita ka, Masabi man lang na mahal kita.
Hanggang sa Muli Ms. Serotonin “Mag-iingat ka.” Pagkatapos kong sabihin ‘yan sa kanya, Tumalikod na ako. Hindi ko na alam kung ano’ng naging reaksyon niya. Hindi ko alam. Dahil pagkatapos kong sabihin iyon, Pagkatapos kong tumalikod, Ay bumagsak na ang kanina pang namumuong ulap lang ng luha sa aking mga mata. Hindi ko na napigilan. Hindi ko na talaga nagawan ng paraan. At hanggang ngayon, Hindi ko pa rin mailabas lahat kahit patuloy lang ito sa pagpatak. Nabibigatan ako. Pero alam kong kaya ko. Umiiyak ako dahil nalulungkot ako sa pag-alis mo, na hindi man lamang kita nahagkan ng ilang segundo. Mag-iingat ka. Mahal kita. Hanggang sa muli nating pagkikita.# 24
Kaarawan ko minsa’y sumpa Kahapon, akin paring naaalala Tanong sa sarili Bakit lumisan na lang bigla? Kalakip ng bawat salita Ay ang patak ng mga luha Luhang matagal kong isinilid Sa dulo ng aking mata Panalangin na sana’y balang araw Mahagkan ka, Papa.#
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Theo Ms. Serotonin Tinitignan kita ng hindi mo alam, Hinahanap kita sa dagat ng katauhan, At nang makita na kita, Para kang kumikislap na bituin sa kalangitan Ang ganda mong tignan. Sa dagat ng mga tao, Ikaw ang unang nakita ko. Pagtingin ko sayo Ay nakatingin ka na Sa akin mismo.#
Writer Jolina Edra I've been awake in the middle of the night Thinking what to write On a piece of an empty paper I have in my left hand, And a ball point in my right, Seeking a word that is grammatical It's absurd isn't it? But I don't care, I just want to be a writer.#
25
PATTA-LOVU
A Scheme of Fate Sheila Mae F. Pavo It’s really mind-blowing, overwhelming and surprising how pretentious things could be. How could a delay in getting out of bed, caused by pulling an all-night schoolwork; a traffic jam caused by a mistake in transportation; of being late in a 7 AM class, caused by a wrong decision of not rushing in pace, lead me to you? How could a pause, a sudden postponement of plans, and limitless unnerving events could mean being too close to you? It feels like the collision of the stars at the right time, a mechanism in the universe, and a rapid pulling of gravity. How could an unexpected twist of happenings, placed me to a situation I didn’t imagine to be in? And yet there you were… and unexplainably, I needed to stay. Surely, before those delays has taken place, it wasn’t my will, not my choice, and yet it was. It wasn’t included in my plans and yet it seemed like it was.# David Cantu (@minimal.line.art)
26
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Unusual Courtroom Ailyne A. Garo I entered a tensed place, So tense you should not make haste. Be cautious to defend, that no regrets shall thou cast in the end. Here was I am in a court, Like everything was in its last resort. But something felt so wrong, A different force that pulled so strong. Situations were not good, Eyes looking like predators hungry for food. Visions criticizing me. As I walked towards the place where I should be. A chair facing forward, I sat there as the case went onward, No judge to be seen, Nor facilitators and prosecutors in the scene. Then the victim entered, Suddenly I felt so bothered. I was the accused!
David Cantu (@minimal.line.art)
So shattered, bleeding and I’m full of bruise. Watchers were there to judge, Like everyone had their own grudge. Attorneys had I none, Deeply broken and hope was slowly gone. I took all possible blame, Like I was in the middle of a burning flame. Trying so hard, I defend But the judges found me guilty in the end.# 27
PATTA-LOVU
Unloved Jolina Edra I heard a bizarre word Something that made me feel weak, Something that made my heart feeble, It was something woeful. The bliss I felt, turned to blue. Do you know what is it? Something that says, "I don't love you."#
Miniature of the World Abigail S. Baltazar School is the miniature of the world It’s not just about classrooms, chairs and chalkboards Nor about notebooks, pencil or uniforms But it’s a universe of young adults At school, I became an adult child Rational, cunning and a little wild I dive deeper, so tender and mild Learning not just academics but more like a slice of life School, a training ground indeed Learnings not only for the mind but more for the heart to feed It has a bunch of lessons you should heed It makes you grow more, like a planted seed School like the miniature of the world Makes us miniature adults.# 28
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Just a poem Sheila Mae F. Pavo
A Star Aki
I just realized today, that there are quite numerous conversations I hope I could have with you. Silly, stupid, deep and long talks. Only that, we are countless of words apart and everything falls left unsaid. It remained just a poem in my head.#
That time when Nyx journeyed the world Gray and Blue nymphs shed their light Then came a melancholic music from a harpsichord Beaming figures were not in sight. What happened, will-o-the-wisps? Where are your heartwarming lights? Did Phoebus snatch them from you? Or are you afraid to lose your light, too? Then here came Artemis, Hecate and Selene Oh! How long has it been? What great brilliance you have shown But now without the stars, you are alone Too good to bring back the radiance Too bad there’s no way to regain For once a star lost its light Forever dead, it’ll remain. #
Canva
29
PATTA-LOVU
All of a sudden PapaB All of a sudden I didn’t expect this would happen, Neither did I want this to happen I didn’t think that you would go away, Making me feel so weak every day. The moments we got together, Brings joy to my happy ever after But the moment we had Made me feel very sad. Those moments will always be remembered Those moments that we had from June to September Turned out to just memories. Memories that are in my remember lists But now that I’ve seen you in a better place, I just hope my name in your memories will never be erased.#
David Cantu (@minimal.line.art)
30
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
I Just Want You To Know Arian Roduta Somebody told me, it wasn’t wrong To feel butterflies settled in stomach. I got to believe how this one works But ended up blaming this self. Those butterflies were beautiful, As if penetrating deep within my soul. However, would you still call it ravishing When those butterflies die day by day? Yes, you’re the reason why butterflies were born You are the reason why they multiplied But could you pretend you aren’t the one Who had turned to kill them as they grow? I thank you a lot for letting me feel That butterflies can grow and be real, Yet, I hope you’d hugged the possibility Of making them live by not leaving me.#
31
PATTA-LOVU
That Moment Arian Roduta One day, I had a glimpse of you And I realized how beautiful your smile was. I heard melody in your laughter–I saw future in your eyes. I had that look in my face as if imagining lines–latitude and longitude were real, Full of direction but uncertain destinations. The moment I got to tell myself I wasn’t in love was the second I realized I was. #
I’ve Learned to Love by Heart Ms. Serotonin I could spend my sleepless nights Working with my 200 plus presentation slides for you. I can live with hunting frogs, Pinning their parts from integumentary, skeletal, to muscular. I’m so used to alcohol and formalin icky odors, As well as frog’s fishy scent stimulating my olfactory nerves. I can live with this dream. Even if this means staying longer in the laboratory, sitting for four hours and more until my vertebral to lumbar region aches.
This is my dream. I was the awaken little dreamer. I am your future Science teacher. #
32
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Heaven Sent Flocy Mae Fernandez It's you who made me believe that you're a doctor. It's you who weighs my actions like a lawyer. It's you who designs the house like an engineer. And it's only you who knows the alphabet like a teacher. My fault that when I was growing up, I often scold you. When special occasion, I forget you. I didn't realize the days you want to scold me but you stayed calm. I didn't realize every occasion, you're the one preparing with your open palm. Painful for me as child to see you sacrifice. Because you're willing to give everything even a cup of rice. If I could do something just to keep you safe and sound. I could've did it before I can still here that sound. Kept were the days you spent years with me. Kept were the moments we shared throughout the flee. Oh how I imagine how lucky I am. For you are my one and only mother. Every child's success, is a mother's rejoice Every child's failure, is a mother's dying voice. For every mother's rejoice is a child's success. And every mother's dying voice is a child's failure. #
33
PATTA-LOVU
34
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
WWZ (World-War-Z) Quijoy Zombies at seven At the drop of a hat, leave A search for brain food.#
Choices Arian Roduta I will set you free And praying you’ll be happy For not choosing me. #
Canva
35
PATTA-LOVU
Amore Michael Santos Flower Fragrance, lovely Smiling at me Prevailing until the last Blooming. #
Canva
36
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Wind Jezer Cornejo Wand’ring to the void Life’s meaning was deciphered That nothing matters. #
Canva
37
PATTA-LOVU
The Butterfly Yerica Hannah Ramos
And the butterfly looks at me again the same way it looked at me that day… How frightful is it to see the light in his eyes? when I know the colors always skip the frame. #
Canva
38
Yerica Hannah D. Ramos
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
39
PATTA-LOVU
40
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
After a long time, here you are again By: Sheila Mae F. Pavo Everything about this day is perfect at is seems: the weather makes the clouds hide the blistering sun, the breezing of wind is gentle, the drizzle adds up to the coolness of the place where people walking show a slight interest of my mere presence in this particular sidewalk. Today is going to be just another day without you. Yet walking on the edge of this lane blew up my assumption. This isn’t one of those days. You are right there, at the other end of this cemented lane, also walking to reach the other side. You are right there, still as handsome as ever with the face that often haunted me in my dreams. You are right there, and I wonder if it’s just a ghost of a certain someone I think about too much or miss so much, but fortunately, no one walked straight through you to crash my only glimmer of hope of denial.
You are right there, and I would’ve appreciated if my migraine came that afternoon, or if the food I ate with my classmates triggered an acid reflux, so I could escape and I wouldn’t be here in this covered lane. I knew that this day would come. I had pondered uncountable times on how to face this chapter. I have gathered enough preparation for this precise episode in my life and I thought I was ready to face it. As the wind blows slowly in front of me and a lump inside my throat starts to grow, I realized I have been so strong even before this day. I have been so strong for not begging you to come back on that cliché raining afternoon. I have been so strong for stopping myself to send you a message whenever I see you online and tell myself not to cry.
I have been so strong for trying to forget everything I miss about you. I have been so strong for accepting my assumed sad truth that you will never come back. I have been so strong for telling everyone I am okay and pretend our memories don’t randomly flash in any moment of the day. But today isn’t one of those days without you and I am giving myself a break at being brave. Finally, we’re in front of each other. And droplets of rain keep falling. I stopped walking while you, on the other hand, have no plan of doing so. But before you can finally take another step, with my heart beating rapidly and I was barely breathing, I managed to ask “Will you get your umbrella back?” – the one I was holding at that moment. 41
PATTA-LOVU “You keep it still”, you said before stepping forward to the other way. And so I decided to continue on my way which eventually created spaces between us, with distance separating us.#
I Finally Found You Cyrine Rabosa Trails of the southwest monsoon touched my arm as the rays of the morning sun of early September tried to pass through the apertures of our unsteady wooden window. The crows of the rooster woke me up an hour earlier than the usual. I did my usual routine, I brewed strong coffee and bought 'pandesal' for my grandfather. As I went towards him, rocking on his indigenous old chair, the light struck his almost winterwhite hair. His pair of blue eyes squinted as he tried to read the newspaper of the day. "Here you go, 'Lo," I said, and placed the things I often prepare for him every morning. He stopped reading and leveled his stares on me. He flashed me his famous crooked smile as another way of saying his gratefulness. He took a sip from his cup and pointed his finger at me.
42
"You…," the tired voice of his showed how old he was right now. I sat in front of him and anticipated for his continuation, "... someday, you'll find the man that will—," his coughs made him stopped from talking. "'Lo, please stop forcing yourself to the things you couldn't do anymore, okay?" calmly yet with a warning voice I said while rubbing his back. For four consecutive days, I have been wanting to hear what's next but I couldn't just stand there watching him trying to catch his breath. For days, I was so eager to know what was what. My curiosity has been awakened by his words and yet I couldn't do anything about it but to just keep on reminding myself that everything has its right timing. Like now, I didn’t know why I was feeling giddy and all but as I closed the distance between me and my grandfather, my instincts were telling me that maybe this
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4 would be the day he was going to complete the thought like a missing puzzle to my broken piece of curiosity. My smile faded when grandfather turned his head over his shoulder motioning me to go back inside. And when I looked him in his ocean eyes I could see nothing. Our gazes locked and I could prove that he badly wanted me to be inside. I got more curious but I chose to come inside. I sat on the chair and gripped the sharp end of the table. I was feeling anxious and all but I knew my old man knew best. And aside from my grandfather, there's no other guy I have ever met. Some tried to court me but I couldn't care more for them. It's not that they haven't exerted any efforts but it's for the fact that they could not meet the standards I have set. It felt lacking. Like something's still missing. When I coudn’t help it anymore, I decided to stand up and lurk from the window looking outside. The overlooking fields of
rice grains welcomed my eyes but later on I've seen a man. later on I've seen a man. He's quite my age, young and fresh. He has this angelic face of a good physique. His eyes were hidden behind those pairs of dark aviators but when he had taken a side view I did see a glimpse of it and those were a pair of smoky eyes. He looked mysterious from afar. But there's something more than being mysterious and that was him being brave. He's courageous for facing my old, terror grandfather. I commended him for that. "Josefina…," I rattled upon hearing the gentle derisive voice of the old man. "... come here." And like a devoted dog to his master, I went back outside. My eyes automatically landed on the rectangular paper he was holding. I could feel my cheeks heated up and my heart pumped blood faster than the usual. My fingers had minds of their own as they fought tangle behind my back.
"This is for you." He handed me the envelope which I opened immediately. Josefina, Josefina, I'm back, sweetie. And I am not going to leave you again. We'll sing the song we used to sing way back then. I could feel the heat on both ends of my eyes. I could feel the sense of longing in me. Words tried to penetrate in my heart but they couldn’t get inside so in the end I just hugged it and silently whimpered. The following days were chilly. My grandfather and I did not worry about it anymore. I presumed that that letter was the first and last letter he would send. Sound of crickets started to get louder as the sun slowly faded. We were taking a look behind of how fast time has brought us now. We were talking about those happy memories that we would like to cherish for forever.
43
PATTA-LOVU A strum of guitar coming from the outside and familiarity lingers within me stopped us from talking. We looked at each other, wondering. Grandfather nodded his head and I stood against the open window. It's the guy who gave the letters to my grandfather and beside him was another guy who looked older, he looked like a middle-aged man. The middle-aged man continued strumming his guitar and recited the first verse of a very special song, a song that was very close to my heart and a song that has the best story of all times.
Later on, it's the guy who sent the letter who continued the song. I could feel a presence behind me and a tap on my shoulder. “When your mom handed you to me I pained for you." My hands cover my mouth to muffle a cry. "Your dad," grandpa caught his breath, "I know you always long for your dad." I closed my eyes and tried to picture out father in my mind. But I could not for we did not 44
have any memories nor fragments to start with. "The only parent who cared for you," he again paused, "He's gone for work. For your best."
emotionally incomplete daughter. Now, I can say that I already found the man that would loved me truly and unconditionally. Then I proclaimed,
Grandfather pointed his finger at the young man, "That's the guy responsible for sending the letter, your brother." I froze. That's quite a controversial for me and even my sobs were halted.
"Papa”.#
"And that," grandfather stopped. I looked back at him, puzzled and confused "Go, Josefina, go." My heart swells. I ran to open the door and when I was finally outside, seeing him this close. The man whom I based my standard with was finally right in front of me. They stopped singing my song, our song, the song that was given by my father when understanding only started to develop. And when he stood up— the middle-aged man, I hugged him while crying. The hug of so many years, the hug of longing and missing and the hug of an
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
BALLIGI (pangbiitan nga istorya) Ni Manang Biday Umadanin ti kanito. Adda panagkebba ti puso. Ti musika nga pangmartsa natokar. In-inot nga naglinya dagiti agturpos. Kaabay da dagiti nagannak da. Ah, daytoyen talaga. Maysa ni Pina kadagiti nagasat nga agleppas ita nga tawen. Kasla agtaptapaw kadagiti ulep ti rikna na. Ti istorya ti biag na ket kadawyan lang kunada. Nagworking student iti las-ud ti uppat nga tawen gapu ta nakurapay ti panagbiag ti pamilyamakitaltalon ni tatang na, agtagibalay ni nanang na, nasapa nga nagasawa ti inauna nga kabsat na ket isuna ti maikadua. Adda pay dua nga ading na.
Nasapa nga naimula iti panunot ni Pina iti kinarigat ti biag. No man pay kasta nagdesisyon isuna nga tulungan ti bagi na nga makaluk-at iti kinakurapay nga dimmakkelan na. Apaman nga nakapasa iti admission test iti Unibersidad, inkagumaan na ti nagbirok ti pagubraan. Nag-part time saleslady ken nagtagibalay. Iti Sabado, makilaba ti bigat ken ag-tutor ti malem. No aldaw ti Domingo, saan nga malipatan ni Pina ti agsimba kasta met nga agisuro pay kadagiti babassit nga ubbing. No bakasyon, mapan agubra kas waitress wenno dishwasher kadagiti panganan idiay ili.
Napartak nga nagtulid dagiti aldaw ken tawen. Kasla kaano lang. Ita ti aldaw ti panagturpos, aldaw nga nabayagen nga inararapaap ni Pina. “And now, the cream of the crop! De la Cruz, Filipina, magna cum laude,” kinuna ti emcee. Timmakder ni Pina, inasibay isuna dagiti siraragsak nga nagannak na. Kasla saan nga agdisso dagiti saka na nga immuli ti entablado. Uray la agling -it dagiti dakulap na. Inyawat ti dekano ti medalya iti nagannak na ket inyugkor da daytoy iti tengnged na. Anian a rag-o ti narikna ni Pina! Dinakulap ti guest speaker, presidente ti Unibersidad, dekano isuna agraman ti nagannak na. Ah, no mabalin la koma nga di agpatingga daydiay nga kanito. Idiay nga gundaway, kasla naiwaksi amin nga rigat nga naglabasan ni Pina. Makita iti rimat ti mata na, saan nga mapunas ti isem na. Daytoy ti gundaway ti panagballigi. # 45
PATTA-LOVU
THE BLACK DAHLIA Beverly Cauilan I’m not a great or even the greatest show-woman. I am just a girl often wearing oversized t-shirts with a messy bun. I’m not on-fleek like girls my age who wear cranky and tight pants strolling in the mall with their gals and posing for a hashtag. I am just a girl putting on my cleaning shirt (because I have them sorted out) while headbanging on a rock-en-roll song that vibes my spirit animal to have a headstart in cleaning the mess mom left before going to work.
I smile. A lot. But beneath all of those, it is you who could always decipher me like some sort of complicated Morse code signaling danger or precautions. Some considers themselves as the colorful roses or tulips or sunflowers. But I would consider myself like the black dahlia which was inspired by The Murder. I built my walls so high; worked so hard to furnish it with strong materials that vibranium couldn’t beat. I appeared tough, acted tough, and looked tough. I was tough. At least, that was my thought.
I am not a colorful girl who applies dozen of expensive pharmaceutical concoctions designed to make miracles for women who have unfortunate faces like mine. I am just a girl who happens to have a lot of battles I don’t discuss about but still kept on masking the core.
Not until you came.
46
You disturb the calm river in me and created an unending ripple. You didn’t stay on the shore for you dive my ocean unafraid of its depth. You climbed my walls which was casted with hundreds of spells I traded the devils with. You entered a cave feared by most but have the conviction that I was there, a treasure long forbidden to the world.
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4 I let go of what doesn’t want to stay so I make rooms of what truly wants to stay. Gladly, you did. The complicacies of loving aren’t always seen on how you showed your love to me. It is more vivid on how you handle me on my storms. You are the man that rejoices on my sunny weather. Yet you are still the same man who sails on my stormy seasons. That is why you deserve to have my love.
I am off the radar of a stereotypical woman that this society shapeshifts. Neither will I do what they do just to tag myself lit. It is because you never slipped a day reminding me you love me for who I am. You might think you’re annoying by saying those everyday but believe me, those were the very words I needed and it played like a sweet melody on my ears. I don’t explicitly express how much I am grateful you came into my life but my “I love you” comes in different forms. It comes in staring at you while carrying my groceries.
It comes in spending our nights telling stories of how foolish I am before and listening to your dramas on how you keep your life together when everything around you is falling apart. It comes in examining your face while you are dead to the world. It is when I greeted you good morning and good night messages everyday. It is when I call you after a long tiring day. It is when I rush to the bathroom in the middle of our date because my heart race into different pace. It’s when I rather spend my mornings with you, brewing a hot coffee in the coldest of February. It is more importantly when I talk to God about you. Right at this moment, I want to treasure all the memories I had and will have with you. Either you serve as a blessing or a lesson for me, the important thing is that I met you. Nothing is regrettable on that part. I can only hope that our two fragments fit together. #
47
PATTA-LOVU
48
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
P A N D E M I C
eople are advised to always wear mask; physical distancing is also a must. lcohol and sanitizer became trends to the mass; and you can’t go out without quarantine pass. umbers of people got infected; no mass gatherings, all are suspended.
aily routines of people got diverted; Due to this crisis, many are distracted.
very single problem that comes our way; everyone should face it and fearlessly say. y Savior is strong both night and day; Make us all safe, that’s all we pray.”
am not sure until when this pandemic would last; hoping the world will recover so fast. ontinue to have faith and endless trust; COVID19, soon just live in the past. #
-EDStraordinary
49
PATTA-LOVU
Sayonara Clementine I was busy crumpling the list of papers tainted with poetry and tears from the pain lingering like a tattoo kiss deep within my skin, until the rude awakening of the crisis knocks me even more. I felt the heaviness as if it’s some kind of boulder rushing around beneath my chest while the flashback of my memory parades vividly in my mind. And thereI felt you once again as I was folding and turning the pages of your photobook. I felt you as I crouched down on my knees to wipe the layers of dust on your bunny toys blooming over the sun-soaked cabinets beside the windows of your room.
I felt you as I moved from room to room, and from task to task. Pausing somewhere between the to-do’s, the I-should’s, and the I-can’s. Tilting my head up wondering if you would be staying awhile this time – even
50
as a memory. But now I stand here right at the moment, weeping in a grey sunlit room. I can still feel you hold my hand, little man. My little boo and dear. My angel. My son. I will always think of you at night whenever I look out to the lonely serene moon. ‘Cause nothing feels more purging than losing you in this untimely doom. And with all those unseen heavy breathe-in’s and breatheout’s and those needles on you being soaked, I just wish this was just some cruel April fools joke. Often slipping across the threshold to help me hold the weight of the moment for what is, undeniably piercing my heart. Yet I am well aware that this is nothing but a pea from all the chaos of the people battling
right at the moment. Even so, let me just soak myself from all the catharsis and venting, and from all shreds and musings falling from my eyes across the melting edges of our hopeless situation and life. Give me a reason.
Sayonara.
#
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
I ignored her calls Jimuel C. Sagario Steffany works at a fastfood restaurant in New Jersey. By that, it means a greater possibility of acquiring the virus. That being the case, I told her to resign from her job temporarily, which she did unquestioningly. I was never worried about her because she is very mature enough when making decisions.
Last week, I was sick while preparing for dinner when I heard my phone rang. My inner self spoke, “That must be Steffany!” So, I abruptly run towards my room and saw Steffany’s image on my phone screen. I felt jumpy and excited. I answered her call, “Honey, I miss you.” Her voice was weird- I heard her crying. “Hon, I missed you too,” she replied. I noticed that she sobbed silently. I was curious so I asked her if something was wrong. “I love you,” she replied instead of answering my questions. I was curious then I said, “You’re giving me chills. You wanted to say something?” After asking her, I heard that she gulped before speaking. “I got infected. I’m sorry,” she sobbed. “You’re joking, are you? It must be another joke,” I asked her.
That time, I worried more. “Before I resigned from my job, I didn’t know that one of my co -workers tested positive of the virus. She’s my friend,” she explained. Hearing it from her was extremely painful so I lost my temper and said, “I am serious Steffany. You shouldn't be telling some comic story! I will pull out the marriage if this is just another joke!" She answered with a rough voice, “Honey, what if I got positive of the deadly virus for real?” By her question, I concluded that she was making fun of me. “Honey, your jokes are horrible. I can’t believe you did this,” I responded with irritation. I was annoyed. I hang up the call even if she was still talking to me. I got mad at her and decided to ignore her for the time being. I felt dismayed about what she said. I ignored her calls to let her realize that joking around is never right if it means luring and hurting someone. I ignored her for almost a week. She persistently and consistently called but I never responded. Notwithstanding my worries towards her, I remained fixed on my objective so she
won't repeat the same mistake next time. Suddenly, I received a call. My phone continued to buzz in my hand as I stared at the name flashing on the screen. My finger hovered above the accept button, but for a moment, I found myself holding back. A pang of panic struck within my chest—I had mere seconds to decide—ignore or answer the call. My mind went into a frenzy as the debate on whether to answer or not answer heats up with their pros and cons, giving their best defense to win me over. To kill my uncertainties, I tapped the green button. Shockingly, she did not sound like Steffany- it was Jane's voice. It was a quick call. After hanging up, I started to scream angrily, “AAAaaahh!” I cried heavily since my world flipped upside down. Jane, her former classmate who works in the hospital she was confined in, informed me, “Emmanuel, sorry to say this. Steffany is gone.” I was shocked, and she continued, “She said that she loves you every day. She wanted to talk to you. She wanted to marry you. She wanted you to find someone in 51
PATTA-LOVU her place and begin your life again.” I lost my senses when I heard those words. I lost everything instantly. I tried to take my own life. I was about to hang myself in the ceiling when my brother went to stop me. I threw temper and said, “She’s my everything! What is life without her? Steffany! Someone, please tell me this is not happening! Please, please, please. Tell me! What is life without Steffany?!” My brother replied, “Emmanuel,
this is the reality. Steffany will never like this. Get up and start your new life.” After hearing and realizing what he said, I cried and mourned. I locked myself up, stayed inside, and befriended silence and sorrow. I thought I made the right decision to ignore her. I couldn’t help but regret every chance I lost. If only I was more thoughtful, perhaps, I could
have consoled her spirits. If only I didn’t get mad easily, perhaps, she could have recovered. If only I answered her calls and talk to her when she wanted to, perhaps she could have been happier before she died. I was full of regret at that moment. The room was filled with a distressing sound of a broken heart expressing bottomless grief and sorrow. The woman I pleaded to marry must be in a great pain before her last sigh. #
In the time of a Pandemic: Fight and Arise! Kaye Angelie A. De Galicia In the time of a Pandemic, We need to be pragmatic. Against a force so enigmatic, We can all be sick. Broken hearted, undecided, People can be dead. Our generation will be corroded. Ain’t no more future to be said. In the midst of a difficult situation, Discipline is our salvation. People’s damnation? Will soon have a solution! Under this cruel biosphere.
52
Currently trapped by a virus and hell, Solutions will appear. Soon! We’re all going to be well. Do not be mischievous, But be conscious. Wash your hands! Don’t come out! It isn’t the end. Maybe this virus that caused so much stress Showed the whole world that more can mean less.
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
Year of Tormented Affliction 2020 has been full of affliction Many people suffered from depression Every single person experienced being tormented There are people who are being demented How long will it last? I hope 2021 will have a blast I pray that 2020 and 2021 will be in contrast Beseechingly asking that recuperation will be fast Do we really deserve this? Pain and hardship must be dismissed When will our anxiety end? God’s will power and plan will intend. I trust that God’s plan will prevail God’s Holy Spirit will never be a frail Trust God and everything will be in place Bad memories will be erased Prayer is the best weapon No one should be abandoned Our fate depends on our actions Doing good deeds must be one of our addiction
53
Yerica Hannah D. Ramos
PATTA-LOVU
54
VOLUME 19 ISSUE 4
55
PATTA-LOVU
56