The University Paper Cardiff - October 2014 by The University Paper

CARDIFF

A COPY OF DESTINY & A PS4:

OCTOBER 2014

FRESHERS EDITION THE BEST OF FRESHERS WEEK

PAGE 03

FIND OUT HOW ON PAGE 36

MAKE THE MOST OF YOUR NEW CITY

PAGES 03, 08-09, & 10-11

WELCOME to the best three years of your life MICHAEL O’CONNELL-DAVIDSON

Cardiff: A new generation of freshers arrive in Cardiff this September. The Welsh capital and a city where a fifth of the population are students, Cardiff is a veritable student mecca and a great place to spend the best three years of your life. Welcome to the city. If you’re just arriving, then we’d also like to take this opportunity to introduce ourselves at the University Paper. We’re a different kind of student publication printing in 16 cities across the country, ranging all the way from Swansea to Sheffield -- and beyond. Over the next academic year, we’ll be bringing you the best local news and entertainment Cardiff has to offer coupled with exclusive national content. To celebrate, we’re running a tongue-in-cheek analysis of the student cities we serve. Each has a population that’s as unique as its location, but how distinct are we talking? Here are some facts -- good and bad -- about each. Given that it’s the reason you’re here, the academic side of things is the most obvious starting point. Warwick University has never been ranked outside of the Top 10 UK major University rankings, and is the only University aside Oxford and Cambridge to have achieved this. However, the University of Edinburgh is the highest ranked University Paper university in the world, coming in at a hugely impressive number 17. Estimates

suggest there are over 16,000 institutions that provide higher education in the world, so if you’re an Edinburgh student, you can feel very smug indeed. Edinburgh also has the highest amount of money spent per student -- but it’s Glasgow that has the most satisfied students according to the National Student Survey, with 91% responding positively this year. A slightly dubious honour falls on the city of Glasgow, where the women of the city buy more fake tan than anybody else in the UK. Tesco also reported that Glasgow leads the way when it comes to buying extra-large condoms, in a league table that also included Manchester and Bristol. Admirably, the academic community in Bristol set themselves apart when the University of Bristol became the first University to admit male and female students onto taught degrees as equals. 15% of Sheffield Students are virgins, so if you’re a reader from Sheffield and you’ve yet to have experience your first time, you can take solace in the fact you’re not alone (or in Glasgow). Our most promiscuous city is Liverpool, where students at Liverpool Hope have had on average 6 partners since starting University in a similar survey. Depending on your perspective, this may be a point of shame or pride. I’ll leave it to you to pass

» CONTINUED ON PAGE 19

DON’T THROW AWAY YOUR LIFE AT UNIVERSITY DANIEL ROBBINS

PICTURE CREDITS: SWNS.COM

UNIVERSITY IS A TIME for many things but getting stuck in a bin shouldn’t be one of them! Independence, responsibility and of course embarrassment are three buzz words that go hand in hand with one of the biggest steps in your life. This step provides the platform to produce the stories that will stick with, or in this case haunt, you forever. Some will shed in you in a good light,

for instance showing independence by looking after yourself in what is likely your ﬁrst time away from home. Other stories fall on the other side and cause embarrassment something this Manchester student knows a lot about. Robin Niven is the name currently on everyone’s lips, and like most embarrassing stories that happen during University years, he was on his way back from a

night out when the incident occurred. Yes, that’s right; he managed to get himself stuck in a bin and luckily for us all, his friends were there to record it. Many students will be able to tell you of countless stupid things they have done following a night out. Whether that be forgetting where you live when ordering a taxi (a common one) or getting on the wrong side of a drinking

W W W.UNIPA PER.CO.UK

game dare. However, very few, if any, will end up with the story concluding in someone being stuck in a bin. And even fewer will involve firemen. Yes - he really was that stuck. Robin had to be rescued by three fire fighters before his ordeal was finally over. The story all starts with a night out in Manchester.

» CONTINUED ON PAGE 19

WIN PS4

AND

DESTINY IF YOU HAVEN’T BEEN ABLE TO LAY YOUR HANDS ON A COPY DESTINY YET, THIS IS THE COMPETITION FOR YOU AS WE HAVE A COPY OF THE GAME AND A PLAYSTATION 4 UP FOR GRABS. IF YOU HAVE BEEN LIVING UNDER A ROCK THE PAST MONTH, DESTINY IS A NEW BLOCKBUSTER MYTHIC SCIENCE FICTION SHOOTER BY THE MAKERS OF HALO. IT BECAME THE WORLD’S MOST SUCCESSFUL NEW GAMING FRANCHISE AFTER IT SHIFTED $500 MILLION UNITS WITHIN JUST 24 HOURS OF ITS LAUNCH.

SO IF YOU FANCY BAGGING YOURSELF OVER £300 OF GAMING GEAR SIMPLY EMAIL YOUR NAME, UNIVERSITY AND YEAR OF STUDY TO WIN@UNIPAPER.CO.UK ENTRIES CLOSE OCTOBER 13TH GOOD LUCK!

FRESHERS GUIDE

SPECIAL

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

UNSPOKEN RULES OF UNIVERSITY CHARLOTTE ARROWSMITH

MAKING THE MOST OUT OF FIRST YEAR NATASSIA TANG

PHOTO CREDIT: CHRIS HILL

PHOTO CREDIT: UNIVERSITY OF CENTRAL LANCASHIRE

You have probably heard many rumours about the first year of university life. From big flat parties to all-nighters your fresher’s year in Cardiff will not disappoint. Here is a quick summary of how you can not only survive your first year, but to also make the most of it. Firstly, go out as much as you can. Whether that be clubbing; socializing at pubs or participating in different societies, Cardiff and its universities have all the answers. The Students’ Union clubs are fantastic, with Cardiff University’s achieving particular acclaim. The unions are also a

REDHOT_StudentUniMag_Ad_129.5x162.5.pdf

08/09/2014

great place to see friends and have a great time on its popular nights out. Secondly, expect a lot of all-nighters before exams as many of us fall into the trap of not preparing well enough. You can easily enjoy the best of both worlds if you manage your time wisely. Equally, balancing out work and pleasure will definitely make your first year sweeter. With second and third years being much harder and a having a much greater workload, you first year is truly about making everlasting experiences and preparing you for the tougher years ahead.

12:53

50% OFF* START YOUR WEEK FULL! FOOD & DRINK

SUNDAY EVENING

Valid until the End of November 2014

*Please check website www.redhotworldbuffet.com for terms and conditions

A DISCOVERY OF TASTE FOR

STUDENNTT

20% DISCOU OK

everyone

SDAY

THUR MONDAY TO

It is now hilarious to bring home various pieces of roadwork memorabilia such as traffic cones and/or ‘Digging Man’ signs; these will replace the empty space where you wish a plasma screen TV would be.

d Student ID ow your vali

LARGE

Simply sh

GROUPS

to qualify

from just

When breaking the ice on your VERY FIRST NIGHT OUT, go easy on being completely honest during a game of ‘Never have I Ever,’- you have to look at your flatmates in the eye for the next year. There will always, no matter what, be a complete raving lunatic somewhere in your halls. Quite possibly, you’ll end up with them in your flat. ‘I have a lecture/meeting/introduction session tomorrow at 9am,’ is a completely invalid excuse to miss a night out and you will be called out for it. Don’t worry if you’re not a big drinker- just socialise with your flatmates regardless. Don’t spend the year in your room and miss out!

STAG, HEN,

OR FROM JUST £7.20 WITH STUDENT DISCOUNT APPLIED!

BIRTHDAY

*To qualify for the 20% discount off your bill, Monday to Thursday, simply show your valid student ID card. This offer is exclusive to the card holders food and drink bill only. Only one 20% discount per card holder. Prices vary depending on day of the week and time, please check website www.redhotworldbuffet.com for terms and conditions. Drink not included in buffet price.

& LEAVING

parties

To qualify for the STUDENT DISCOUNTS at Cardiff Red Hot World Buffet, simply complete this form and bring it with you.

Call us on 0292 0342499

Book Online Now...

Name: Email:

www.rhwb-cardiff.com

Tel: Gender: Male

Female

Date fo Birth:

Your details will be kept on a secure database so that we can inform you of offers, events and promotions. Please tick if you do not wish us to contact you by email, or text. We will not disclose your information to any third party and you can choose to unsubscribe at any time.

Find us at Hill Street, St Davids CF10 2LE facebook/redhotbuffet

#REDHOTFOOD

instagram/redhotwldbuffet

FRE E

If you successfully avert Fresher’s Flu (it is not a myth), you will be regarded as superhuman or quite possibly bionic.

IDEAL FOR

GET

You will, in time, almost revert to being a baby again; there is no such thing as bedtime, you will have unannounced naps throughout the day, and food will cease to be of a standard you are used to at home and you wish your mum was doing a roast on Sunday, when you will be in fact inhaling Pot Noodles and nursing hangovers.

During Fresher’s week it is necessary to CM attempt to get photos with pretty much every single student in the union and/or on nights outMY because you never know, they could be your best CY friend one day. Oh, and add them on Facebook so you can let all your mates at home just how well CMY you’re getting on without them.

✁

As a student on the cusp of my final year, graduation is hurtling impossibly fast towards me, and I’m consumed with envy at the throng of freshers tumbling into halls and both shaking hands and exchanging beers within the same breath. But being in Cardiff for two years already has taught me the ins and outs of student life that lecturers and tutors don’t tell you.

NO NEED TO B

FRESHERS GUIDE

SPECIAL

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

Guide to the City

LUCY GUY

PHOTO CREDIT: SOPHIE BEAUMONT

COMPLETE GUIDE

TO BECOMING A

BNOC NIALL IVIN

PHOTO CREDIT: EVOQUE

THE BIG NAME ON CAMPUS. The person everyone in the university knows, even the cafeteria staff. If you make it, you will walk taller. You will smell better. People will laugh at your jokes, and strive to impress you. You will become an abstraction, permeating all aspects of university life. You will have so much on your plate, it’ll be like you’re at Red Hot World Buffet.

As a capital city it has the same buzz as London without being quite so daunting or ridiculously expensive. CARDIFF IS a city full of excitement and potential, is a fantastic place to spend your student life. As a capital city it has the same buzz as London without being quite so daunting or ridiculously expensive. Cathays is the heart of Cardiff’s student body and there are loads of cool and quirky places to explore without even venturing into the city centre. Cafe 37 is an absolute must for anyone suffering from a hangover induced by cheap vodka and lots of shots. This American style diner has something for everyone with pancakes, fry-ups and milkshakes in every flavour. Noodlebox on Salisbury road is also a lifesaver for any student on a budget that just can’t be bothered to cook. It’s quick and easy food tastes amazing and comes at a low price that just beats the washing up that comes with cooking for yourself. Cardiff also boasts one of the best student unions in the country; after a complete revamp of the Solus nightclub this summer it looks like it’s set to stay on top. Cardiff students have voted the SU number eight on the which? university guide with loads of gigs and the best Wednesday and Saturday nights in the city helping it maintain it’s status. Check the line up for the year early on as tickets tend to sell out for the best events pretty early on.

“

Noodlebox on Salisbury road is also a lifesaver for any student on a budget that just can’t be bothered to cook.

If you’re already a bit sick of students and want to head back to normality then the city centre is only a short walk away. There are loads of great shops, both high street and unusual and once you’ve learnt to navigate yourself around St David’s shopping centre (and all the vintage arcades) you’ll never be bored of shopping. The arcades are definitely worth exploring as they are home to one-off shops and restaurants. Coffee Barker in the High Street Arcade is the place for a chilled out afternoon with a huge slice of cake and a relaxed atmosphere. You’ll find yourself struggling to get out of the huge, comfy armchairs and wishing you could stay all day. Cardiff is full of places to visit. The city centre is thriving with restaurants, shops and cafés, while Cathays is the hub of student activity. Roath park is perfect for a lazy Sunday in the sunshine or a days pedalo-ing with your new flatmates. The Taf Trail is a fantastic way to explore Cardiff where you can hire bikes or just go for a casual stroll. Cardiff has something for everyone and is one of the friendliest places in the UK so make sure you get stuck in and see what it has to offer!

So, if you dream of becoming a Halls-hold name, and to bask in the glory of university fame then the following options are your best chance of success. OPTION 1: Become team captain! Usually of rugby/ football, requirements include a chiselled jaw line, a low body fat percentage, and some sporting talent. The creativity to devise an initiation ceremony that makes national news is a bonus. Side effects; The occasional injury, expensive gym membership, being unable to tense without tearing t-shirts at the seams. OPTION 2: Sleep with lots of people! This is arguably a simpler route to take, although a degree of talent is again required. Other requirements include; genitals. Side effects; Being stared at judgementally and lustfully in the cafeteria/ lecture theatre. Potentially acquiring sexually transmitted infections. OPTION 3: Become president of the S.U or a society! Arguably the most difficult option, requirements include; leadership and organisational skills, charisma, and an ability to deal with people horrifically defacing your campaign posters. Side effects; Power going to your head and becoming a despotic lunatic with fantasies of being S.U president forever. OPTION 4: Be the perennially drunk person! Everyone knows the guy who has 27% attendance, and got arrested for defecating outside Revs. Requirements include; Your student loan and the ability to persuade parents that university is going swimmingly. Side effects; Achieving a third, liver disease, nervous breakdown, expulsion. These are just a fraction of the routes to become a university celebrity. Whichever road you choose one thing is absolutely certain. Becoming a B.N.O.C WILL change your life, for better or worse, and forever. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

Breaking the ice with your new housemates STORIES: MUSTAFA HERSI

PHOTO CREDIT: CHARLOTTE ARROWSMITH

First impressions count! Moving into a new flat with random people you’ve never met before can be quite frightening, but it’s something many students have to endure. So how do you greet this stranger who you have to live with or study with for the foreseeable future? Do you shake hands, do a complimentary nod in their direction or that painful awkward smile? Don’t worry – we’re here to help. “I’m Bob. What’s your name?”- The most common and foolproof ice breaker around, this simple intro-and-question combo can ease your initial bout of anxiety. An additional perk is that you’ll actually know what to call this person you’ll be living/studying with, rather than just repeatedly yelling “hey!” until you get their attention. Of course, you’ll hear so many names that you’ll forget some, but so will everyone else. Besides, joking about it might bring you even closer together.

“Am I the only one who feels awkward right now?” – If accompanied with a complimentary giggle, grin or grimace, this can ease the anxiety in a heartbeat since it shows a degree of sincerity. (Ironically, it would be less sincere now because you’d be doing it on our recommendation.) Acknowledging the awkwardness often gets rid of it immediately, whereas stepping around it can only make it worse. “Fancy a cup of tea?”- In the UK this ice breaker is the one that gets people talking, because tea drinking is pretty much a national pastime. Follow it up with a series of exciting questions such as “how many sugars?” or “milk? No milk?” and desperately hope the conversation becomes more interesting. “What do you want to do after uni?” – This may seem a bit boring but it can be the catalyst for a list of follow up questions and can help you get to know the other person a whole lot better.

LIKE OUR FACEBOOK PAGE FOR A

CHANCE TO

WIN

£2000 WORTH OF APPLE PRODUCTS 13” Macbook Pro | iPad Retina | iPhone 5S | iPod Touch

facebook.com/TheUniPaper

COMMENT FRESHERS

GUIDE

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

SPECIAL

We confront the issues that ma er to you, right here on campus. Have an opinion? Contact us at: editor@unipaper.co.uk to have your say

THE BIG DEBATE

Are Promoters Too Pushy? MICHAEL O’CONNELL-DAVIDSON

Dear Freshers: when you move to University, one of the most daunting aspects is meeting new people and finding new friends. However, there is one type of person that will want to be your best friend. In fact, they want to be your best friend so much that they will offer ‘once of a lifetime’ offers to various ambiguous clubs with suggestive names. They will offer you free entry, free champagne, a free shot on entry and (because they love you so much) even free VIP entry for you and all your friends. What must I do to receive such a privilege, you may well ask. Well, all you have to do is put your name on the guest list…maybe your email address…perhaps befriend them on Facebook. I warn you, grasshopper, this is your first mistake. See that invitation to join ‘The Official Ultimate Exclusive Freshers Event 2014’? No, don’t accept it. Unless, of course, you wish you be bombarded with invite after invite, friend request after friend request and a barrage of dodgy, bosseyed clubbing photos from your new and persistent buddy. Having spent my first year at university doing all of the above to other innocent freshers, I can vouch for the fact that Tinchy Stryder will not be making a guest appearance (but a couple of his songs might) and Miss Dynamite will not be DJing, despite her face appearing over every poster and flyer that litters your halls. My advice to you, promo virgins, is: do not answer your door after 6pm (traditional starting time for a good old fashioned promo shift), do not befriend that sexy boy/girl on Facebook with over 5000 friends and, most importantly, DO NOT give them your phone number unless you wish to receive blanket texts every day of the week informing you that you must ‘TEXT ME BACK FOR LAST FEW TICKETS’. Freshers, I wish you luck.

Is a dry Freshers possible? MICHAEL O’CONNELL-DAVIDSON

If you read anything about Freshers’ Week -- or, really, University life in general -- before going to Uni, then chances are you’re under the impression that you’re going to be drinking a lot over the next three years. But alcohol isn’t an express ticket to social nirvana or just a good time. I’ve worked for a club making videos of people on nights out, and I had to stay sober on the job. It wasn’t until then I realised that the best nights out I’d ever had (and have had since) have been the ones where I’ve been sober. Clubs are mad. They’re full of idiots -- well, normal people acting like idiots -- and they’re a great place to go people watching. It’s not like entry is conditional on you having a certain blood alcohol level, and you’ll even save some cash by skipping the vodka shots. You see, they don’t tell you this in student life talks or Freshers’ facebook events, but everybody is terrified on Freshers’ Week. They’re either scared they won’t be accepted, or they won’t be accepted for who they are. But if you drink just to fit in, you won’t get anywhere in the long run. So by all means drink if you want, but if you’re not comfortable drinking just come clean. Your housemates aren’t monsters: they’re people too, and unless you’ve got a truly bad deal, they probably won’t treat you any differently. In fact, because they’re likely just as scared as you are, you might just find that they feel the same way.

SPECIAL

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

Indepth, Insightful, & uncompromising: Interviews with BITE

TO BE FRANK The phrase ‘hardest-working man in show business’ is overused. And more than that, it’s an impossible thing to measure. But, if there was a league table, you can bet Frank Turner would be up there. The folk-punk singer has been touring in one shape or another for the past 16 years, whether as part of his short-lived “terrible” school band Kneejerk, the much-missed post-punk band Million Dead or as a solo artist. He’s heading out on the road again in September, his second UK tour this year. This time, however, there are a few differences. Firstly, the venues Turner and his band, The Sleeping Souls, are performing in are off the beaten path. It’s a nod to the fact Turner, after being born in Bahrain, grew up close to Winchester in the Hampshire village of Meonstoke, and bands very rarely, if ever, came to play nearby. “It’s also a nod of respect to people who like my music,” he says. “I am aware not everyone lives in London, Glasgow, Manchester and Birmingham. And people are so entitled these days. As soon as we announced these gigs, people in the cities were saying, ‘There’s nowhere near me’, so I say ‘Yes there is, there’s this place, which is 15 minutes on the train’. Those guys in the sticks have to travel all the time. “Plus, as well as keeping fans on their toes, it’s more interesting for me and my crew to go to new places, too.” The other reason Turner’s forthcoming run of shows will be different is that rather than promoting an album - his fifth album Tape Deck Heartcame out last year - he and the band are going to be playing all-new songs in preparation for recording their sixth. “We’re going into the studio in October,” he explains. “I’ve long had the feeling I’m yet to make a record that captures what we sound like live. You can think about methodology and studio craft all you want, but why not just go into the studio on the back of a tour when we’re sounding great? “And I’ve got way too many songs for an album - 19 at last count - so we’re going to play lots of them, and we will work out what to put on the record from that. Not that I’m going to be saying, ‘That went down well, let’s put it on the record’, but I’ll get a good idea from crowd reaction and from playing the songs each night.” His next album, he expects, will be released at the end of February, and will feature one song called Love Forty Down, a metaphor for being in your Thirties and being “rubbish at relationships”, inspired by hearing some friends playing table tennis one night. Another is called Get Better, which shares a title with a song by his friends Dan Le Sac Vs Scroobius Pip. “I rang Pip to ask if it was OK to share the title and not only did he say yes, but he offered to remix the song for us as well.” There’s not much sign of this workload stopping. Despite 2014 seeing him play all over the world, Turner’s team are currently booking shows, provisionally at least, for 2016. “I live a life that revolves around album cycles, and those shows are definitely written in pencil rather than pen, but yeah, it’s all being planned.

“It’s more interesting for me and my crew to go to new places, too.”

And I wouldn’t have it any other way.” After a summer of playing festivals all over Europe, he’s particularly excited to get back to playing his own shows, while this summer marked the point where he’d been touring for more than half his life. “I did my first tour in 1998, which was 16 years ago, and now I’m 32, so yeah, half my life on the road. I think we celebrated with another gig, which seemed about right.” Turner was born in Muharraq in Bahrain. His father was a banker and was on a posting to the Middle East in the early Eighties, and Turner lived there for the first six months of his life. “The main impact that it has on my life is that the place of birth on my passport is Muharraq. Try getting into the US with Muharraq written on your passport,” he says. His grandfather, Sir Mark Turner, was once chairman of high street chain BHS, while his father, Roger, worked in investment banking, and his mum Jane is a primary school headteacher. The life of a travelling folk singer perhaps seems unlikely for a former Eton pupil (Turner studied alongside Prince William at the elite school), and much has been made in the past of his background and political beliefs. Turner describes himself as a “classic liberal” in line with many modern libertarians, and has beliefs based on “democracy, individuality, equality of opportunity, distrust of power and, above all else, freedom, including economic freedom”. He has ‘Freeborn’ tattooed on his knuckles, as well as the ama-gi Sumerian cuneiform on his arm, the first written reference to the word ‘Freedom’ found in southern Mesopotamia, now modern Iraq, although as he gets older, he says he’s less inclined to share his politics at all. For now, at least, he’s concerning himself with his music - “The only thing I’m really interested in” - and preparations for album six. “I have a title but I can’t tell you what it is,” he says, though he will reveal it’ll be an upbeat collection, after the break-up confessional of Tape Deck Heart. “I want it to be shorter, too. We did a deluxe album for the last one, which seems confused to me in retrospect,” Turner adds. “I want the next one to be a 12-track album - simple and direct.”

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

WHAT’S ON

The BEST nights this Fresher’s week & throughout the month

THIS MONTH MONDAY 22ND SEPTEMBER

● School Disco @ PRZYM ● Bump and Grind @ UNDERTONE ● Block Party @ SODA AND BUNKER ● Jagerfest @ GLAM ● Vinyl Launch Night @ Y PLAS TUESDAY 23RD SEPTEMBER

● Twisted Circus Sync Launch @ REVS ● Back to School @ SODA AND BUNKER ● Knee Socks @ BUFFALLO ● Freshers street party @ PRZYM AND TIGER ● Beach Party @ Y PLAS

FRIDAY 3RD OCTOBER

● CYNT @ LADYBIRD ● Antisocial @ GLAM ● Mike Skinner DJ Set @ BUFALLO ● Zerox @ CLWB LFOR BACH ● Womp @ MOON CLUB SATURDAY 4TH OCTOBER

● Welcome to the Jungle @ SPLOTT WAREHOUSE ● SOS @ BUNKER ● Freshers Closing Party @ CHARLIE BROWNS ● Dirty Pop @ CLWB LFOR BACH ● Tique @ CARDIFF ANTIQUE MARKET

best night out : ● CYNT @ LADYBIRD ● Antisocial @ GLAM ● Smack @ SODA ● Zerox @ CLWB LFOR BACH SATURDAY 18TH OCTOBER

● Amor Saturdays @ DC ● SOS @ BUNKER ● Dirty Pop @ CLWB LFOR BACH ● Flux @ Y PLAS SUNDAY 19TH OCTOBER

● Sunday Project @ LADYBIRD

FRESHERS AND BEYOND

FRESHERS WEEK

Let’s kick off with Cardiff ’s very own Fresher week Lineup. Starting with Sunday – the Sabbath, and the holy day of Moving-In parties -- Flocks of Freshers and Refreshers alike will be headed towards superclub Przym or neighbouring bars Soda and Bunker’s joint Block Party. Being the first acceptable night to get thoroughly friendly with old and new acquaintances, it’s not to be missed. The following days will unfold as a relentless night after night series of similarly themed eve-

THURSDAY 25TH SEPTEMBER

● TNT Launch ● Barcrawl @ WALKABOUT ● Traffic Light Party @ TIGER TIGER ● Cake Thursdays @ PRZYM ● Back to School @ Y PLAS FRIDAY 26TH SEPTEMBER

● Antisocial Launch @ GLAM ● Smack Soda ● Zerox @ CLWB LFOR BACH ● Womp @ MOON CLUB ● 999 Club @ Y PLAS

SUNDAY 5TH OCTOBER

● Sunday Project @ LADYBIRD

Monday 6th October ● Cream @ LADYBIRD ● Bump and Grind @ UNDERTONE ● Vinyl @ Y PLAS

SUNDAY 28TH SEPTEMBER

● Drake Night @ SODA ● Zoo Disco @ PRZYM ● Sunday Project @ LADYBIRD ● Freshers Ball @ CARDIFF STUDENT UNION

MONDAY 29TH SEPTEMBER

● Cream @ LADYBIRD ● Bump and Grind @ UNDERTONE ● White Party @ SODA ● Vinyl @ Y PLAS

● Hashtag @ TIGER TIGER ● Sync @ REVOLUTIONS ● Knee Socks @ BUFALLO WEDNESDAY 8TH OCTOBER

● WTF Wednesdays @ RETROS ● The Subways @ CLWB LFOR BACH ● YOLO @ Y PLAS THURSDAY 9TH OCTOBER

● Cake Thursdays @ PRZYM ● TNT @ WALKABOUT FRIDAY 10TH OCTOBER

● Treatment @ Y PLAS ● Womp @ MOON CLUB ● zerox ● @ CLWB LFOR BACH ● CYNT @ LADYBIRD ● Dirty Pop @ CCLWB LFOR BACH SATURDAY 11TH OCTOBER

● Cellar Door @ THE VAULTS ● SOS @ THE BUNKER ● Amor Saturdays @ LADYBIRD ● Dirty Pop @ CLWB LFOR BACH SUNDAY 12TH OCTOBER

● The Sunday Club @ LADYBIRD

TUESDAY 30TH SEPTEMBER

● Hashtag animal party @ TIGER TIGER ● The Big Glam @ ICEBREAKER ● Kids in Glass Houses @ CLWB LFOR BACH

MONDAY 13TH OCTOBER

● Jagerfest @ GLAM ● Vinyl @ Y PLAS TUESDAY 14TH OCTOBER

● Knee Socks @ BUFALLO

WEDNESDAY 1ST OCTOBER

● Krispy Kreme Party @ SODA ● WTF Wednesdays @ RETRO ● Wheres Wally @ IDC ● YOLO @ Y PLAS

WEDNESDAY 15TH OCTOBER

● WTF Wednesdays @ RETROS ● YOLO @ Y PLAS THURSDAY 16TH OCTOBER

THURSDAY 2ND OCTOBER

● Bontan Purrmotions productions @ BUFALLO ● TNT @ WALKABOUT ● Thai Moon Party @ TIGER TIGER

For those who want to take a break from wrist-banded union events (remember, there’s life outside of the union, and the less said about “YOLO” the better), a casual trip to the gin ﬁlled basement party Bump and Grind at Undertone may take your fancy. With yummy juicy mixed drinks and a delectable selection of all your favourite nineties and noughties R&B, it’ll cure those Monday blues forever.

So whether you intend to get to know your new housemates, meet new people, see your favourite DJs or simply to explore the spectrum of clubs across the City there are plenty of events to quench your thirst – for Freshers and beyond.

TUESDAY 7TH OCTOBER

SATURDAY 27TH SEPTEMBER

● SOS Launch @ BUNKER ● Freshers UV rave @ CHARLIE BROWNS ● Amor Saturdays @ DC ● Dirty Pop @ CLWB LFOR BACH ● Flux Takeover/Foam Party @ Y PLAS

nings, such as Revolutions’ Circus themed Sync night on Tuesday, Przym’s white Ibiza rave the following week and Tiger Tiger’s Hawaiian beach party on the ﬁnal Friday of the week.

With most of Cardiff ’s clubs boasting at least three regular nights a week catering specially for the city’s students, it’s hard not to find a night without competitive drink deals and crowd pleasing musical offerings to get you dancing. For those who perhaps want something more from their nights, be it a novel venue, killer line up or musical specialism, Cardiff ’s events calendar rarely fails to deliver.

WEDNESDAY 24TH SEPTEMBER

● Freshers Masquerade Ball ● Foam Party @ DC ● WTF Wednesdays @ RETRO ● YOLO Launch Night @ Y PLAS

BY JADE ATWOOD

● TNT @ WALKABOUT ● Cake Thursdays @ PRZYM FRIDAY 17TH OCTOBER

● Womp @ MOON CLUB

THE UNIVERSITY TEAM ATTENDED THE

LOADED MAGAZINE RELAUNCH PARTY @PRESS, LONDON

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

Get the party started!!

D U T hh

£5

FOR THE LATEST ENTERTAINMENT NEWS:

www.unipaper.co.uk www.facebook.com/theunipaper www.twitter.com/theunipaper

FIND US ONLINE

Shhh hh ... It’s only for students - Sunday to Thursday only -

CARDIFF HIGH10ST1AW

6 High St, Cardiff CF

Available to students only with a valid NUS or student card. Bella Italia reserves right to withdraw the offer at any time and without notice. bellaitalia.co.uk

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

11 Need a little something to spice up your pre-party? Check out Mindbenders

Âť MINDBENDERS ON PAGE 28

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

BY PHIL HAMILTON

PICTURES: BANG SHOWBIZ AGENCY

KIM’S KRYING GAME KIM KARDASHIAN WEST was reduced to tears when she had to babysit her sister’s kids. The 33-year-old star agreed to look after her older sibling Kourtney’s two children, Mason, four, and Penelope, two, while also caring for her own 14-monthold daughter North - her child with husband Kanye West. Kim admits she struggled to care for all three kids and was “crying” at the end of the day when she finally got them all in bed. During an appearance on ‘The Ellen DeGeneres Show’ - which aired on September 9th - she revealed: “I just went to San Diego to give my pregnant sister a break. “I took care of my niece, nephew, and my daughter. To bathe them - all three - feed them, get them in their pyjamas and down for bed, I was literally crying!” Kim added: “It was so hard, three kids. I don’t know how my mom did it with six.” Kim’s emotional babysitting experience has made her think twice about her previous wish to have a large family. She admitted: “I’ll go for two, but then again I have so many siblings and I love it, they’re my best friends and I would love that for my kids. So I’m going to do two and see how it goes. I don’t think [I’d have] six, but maybe three or four - I go back and forth.” As well as Kim and Kourtney their mother Kris Jenner also has son Rob and daughter Khloe from her marriage to their late father Robert Kardashian and daughters Kendall Jenner and Kylie Jenner from her relationship with estranged husband Bruce Jenner.

Never, ever, ever... GETTING A DATE? TAYLOR SWIFT has not been on a date since she split from Harry Styles. The ‘Trouble’ singer has been involved in numerous high-profile relationships since breaking into the pop industry, including romances with Joe Jonas, John Mayer and Jake Gyllenhaal, but Swift, 24, says she’s not seen anybody since she split from Harry of One Direction. Speaking to Rolling Stone magazine, she explained: “[I] have not gone on a date. People are going to feel sorry for me when you write that. But it’s true.” Taylor says that one reason why she has consciously avoided dating was because she felt that she was making

PUPPIES FOR PRINCES? 200 BRITAIN’S PRINCE HARRY reportedly wants a puppy for his birthday. The 29-year-old royal is set to celebrate his 30th birthday on September 15th and although he’ll be receiving £10million from his late mother, Princess Diana’s estate and her wedding dress on the day, it’s been reported he also has his eye on a much fluffier present. A royal source told MyDaily that the

Prince “wants a Labrador puppy and that’s what he has asked for.” Perhaps seeing his brother and sisterin-law, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge - who have 14-month-old son Prince George together - so happy with their cocker spaniel Lupo has inspired the Prince to get a pet of his own. Meanwhile, Duchess Catherine, her sister Pippa Middleton and Harry’s pal Guy Pelly are said to be planning a bash

to celebrate his milestone birthday and will be serving Harry-themed cocktails. A friend of the Prince told Royal Watch: “Harry will want a big party, so the drinks will be flowing.” Before the party starts, however, Harry will be treated to a meal with 30 of his closest friends and family and Catherine will reportedly be cooking up his favourite dishes of Beef Wellington, Fish Pie and Eton Mess for dessert.

too many headlines for that reason. She explained: “I’m just not comfortable providing that kind of entertainment anymore. I don’t like seeing slide shows of guys I’ve apparently dated. “I don’t like giving comedians the opportunity to make jokes about me at awards shows. I don’t like it when headlines read ‘Careful, Bro, She’ll Write a Song About You,’ because it trivializes my work.” The ‘Love Story’ hitmaker added: “And most of all, I don’t like how all these factors add up to build the pressure so high in a new relationship that it gets snuffed out before it even has a chance to start.”

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

er...

TE?

hat reason. st not at kind of I don’t like s I’ve appar-

medians the es about me like it when Bro, She’ll because it

aker added: like how all uild the prestionship that it even has a

BELIEBING ‘This Is How I Do’ IN BETTER BEHAVIOUR Katy Perry is planning to write a tell-all book. The ‘This Is How We Do’ hitmaker has reportedly been oﬀered a number of multi-million dollar book deals from American publishers who are convinced her story will be a worldwide hit.

IN ADDITION to the breakdown of her marriage to Russell Brand - whom she split from in 2011, 14 months after they tied the knot - they’re also hoping she’ll spill the beans on her other high profile relationships with John Mayer and Gym Class Heroes star Travie McCoy. They also believe stories about her childhood would make for great reading as the queen of pop was brought up in a strict Christian family and was initially trying to make it as a gospel singer before becoming a household name with hits such as ‘I Kissed A Girl’ and ‘California Gurls’. A source said: “Her story and relationships are fascinating to many people in America, from her pop fans, Christian groups and star-loving book readers.”

Katy is reported to have been worried that Russell was going to open up about their sex life in a book of his own after he refused to agree to a gagging order in their divorce papers. However, he’s now shelved plans for a third instalment of his ‘My Booky Wook’ autobiography series. A source told the Daily Mirror newspaper: “Katy thought that Russell was going to tell all about what they got up to in the bedroom ... However, now the boot is on the other foot because Katy is being offered deals to come out and present her version of events. “She wasn’t very kind to Russell when she spoke about him after the split and with her star at such a meteoric height, publishers expect her to be a best seller.”

JUSTIN BIEBER is reportedly seeing a therapist. The 20-year-old singer is allegedly seeing a £600-an-hour Los Angeles shrink, John Kenyon, to help control his impulsive behaviour following multiple run ins with the law - which left him facing charges of assault and drag racing - earlier this year. A source told The Daily Star newspaper: “Kenyon’s treating Justin in person, when possible, then over Skype when he’s away. Sometimes they even have more than one session a day.” Despite the sought-after therapist’s hectic schedule, the ‘Boyfriend’ hitmaker used his celebrity status to skip a lengthy waiting list of patients and is said to be enjoying the sessions. The source added: “Kenyon’s so booked up he doesn’t normally take on new

clients but Justin used his name to skip the three-year waiting list. “It’s too soon to tell if it’s having a positive eﬀect , but the fact that Justin has kept it up and passed the ﬁrst batch of sessions speaks volumes. “If he hates something he’s not normally the kind of person to stick it out.” It is thought Justin was encouraged to participate in the sessions by his mother Pattie Mallette, 39, who has become increasingly worried that his erratic behaviour will be damaging to his career. The source explained: “His mum Pattie suggested he should give it a go. “She’s constantly worried he’ll do something that will ruin everything he’s worked for. And he adores his mum so he agreed to do it for her.”

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

MUSIC

R.I.P FRANKIE KNUCKLES THE PASSING of Frankie Knuckles earlier this year marked an end of an era for house music. In April, musos mourned as the unexpected death of Frankie Knuckles hit the headlines. Frankie dubbed “The godfather of house music” died at his home in Chicago aged 59 following complications to Type II diabetes. Despite his career being cut short he leaves behind a musical legacy that will have generations to come cutting shapes. The Grammy-winning DJ and producer started his career in the early 1970‘s as a disco DJ at The Warehouse in Chicago. It was his experimental style that would later become known as house, a genre which would inspire dance acts such as Daft Punk to take to the decks. Frankie’s career went from strength to strength, with chart topping tracks such as “Your Love” and “The Whistle Song”. He also began produce records for the likes of Madonna, Whitney Houston and Depeche Mode. In 2004, then Illinois state senator, Barack Obama dubbed August 25th Frankie Knuckles Day and re-named the street where the Warehouse once stood, Frankie Knuckles Way. In 2005, he was inducted into the Dance Music Hall of Fame. However three years later, he developed diabetes which would lead to having his foot amputated. But this didn’t stop Frankie, who played gigs right up until two days before his death. But what made Knuckles stand apart from the rest was that he understood how to make it happen on the dance floor, sometimes referred to as the “priest of the dancefloor”. Only time will tell who will step up to the decks next.

PARTY ANIMAL? ALWAYS OUT AND ABOUT? Did you catch up with our snappers. Check out pages 10 and 11 to see if you made the cut.

REVIEWS

ALBUM REVIEW

NEW EYES CLEAN BANDIT

2014 has been the year of Clean Bandit! After having the UK’s fastest-selling single of 2014 so far with their chart-topping anthem “Rather Be”, they also completed a hugely successful UK tour and a massively varied festival season across the UK and around the world. Their new album New Eyes has a multitude of tunes such as “Mozart’s House”, “Extraordinary”, “Come Over”, “A&E” and “Heart on Fire” and with their signature mix of classical music and garage pop they have managed to hit new heights with their album. ‘Extraordinary’ is a excellently executed mix of percussion beats, while ‘Mozart’s House’ manages to take a sample of the composer’s String Quartet No. 21 and then magically turns it into an impressive house rave within seconds and newly released single ‘Come Over’ was one of the biggest

hits of summer 2014. The album manages to layer classical music over beats and at the same time incorporates many different textures and influences across the 13-track album and their decision to collaborate with largely unknown artists had added more flare to the album, than cashing in which in turn turns the album in to a massively successful varied collection. However, even though the album is mostly successful in its approach, they do have a few tracks that closely touch on annoying. The repetitive hook of ‘Telephone Banking’ slips into annoying half way through and even the album named track ‘New Eyes’ is too long-winded.

RATING: 5/5

THE ROUND UP: To Me, Her Hips Don’t Lie SHAKIRA IS expecting another son. The ‘She Wolf’ singer announced last month she is pregnant with her second child with soccer star Gerard Piqué. Now Shakira’s mother Nidia and father William have revealed she is carrying a brother for her 19-month-old son Milan. Her parents told Hola! magazine: “We’re very happy. She’s having another baby boy - a playmate for Milan.” Although they now the sex of their next grandchild, Nidia and William do not know what Shakira and Gerard plan to call their next baby. They added: “We don’t know anything about names yet.” Shakira confirmed the happy news in a magazine interview and on her Twitter page telling her millions of followers: “Yes, we are expecting our second baby!! Thank you all for your well wishes!” Shakira, 37, has previously stated she’d like to have a huge family with Gerard, 27, with her dream being to have enough kids for her

own soccer side. She previously said: “If it weren’t because of my music projects, I would be pregnant already. I would love to have eight or nine kids

To You

WILL YOUNG has started selling his old clothes online. The ‘Jealousy’ singer has launched an online fashion website with friends, selling old items of clothing alongside a selection of new items. Despite his estimated £12.5 million fortune, the 35-year-old star has been clearing out his wardrobe to get rid of his unwanted items on the virtual retailer, My Vintage Journey. He tweeted: “My website http://myvintagejourney.com is live!!!! Hats in all colours, vintage and 2nd hand clothes and bits and pieces! More stuff to come (sic)” Fans of the singer - who won the inaugural series of the ITV singing competition ‘Pop Idol’ in 2002 - can purchase a variety of items from vintage waistcoats to Alexander McQueen high top sneakers, with several items previously being owned by the ‘Leave Right Now’ crooner. Will informed his 191,000 followers on Twitter that the most popular items are, in

fact, not his unwanted garments, but knitted beanie hats which are being sold on the site for £15 each. The website features a handwritten ‘About Us’ page which reads: “Here our team finds treasures. Treasures to wear, treasures to look at, treasures to give and/or keep for yourself! “Our aim is to focus on quality. Found clothes, accessories and little gems are our passion. We all have day to day jobs and we all come together to discover stuff we want to pass on to you.”

READY FOR THE weEKEND?

We sit down with the fabulous Frankie Bridge of The Saturdays ahead of their Greatest Hits Tour WHAT ARE THE REASONS BEHIND HAVING A GREATEST HITS TOUR NOW AND NOT AT THE END OF YOUR CAREER?

ges to layer We have just released our greatest hits album as we thought it would be good to have all our singles ame time and influenc-so far on just one album. The tour follows that as decision to all the fans should know the words to the songs ts had added and we thought it would be a really enjoyable in which in experience for us all. successful

mostly sucfew tracks petitive o annoying named track

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

WHEN YOU STARTED YOUR JOURNEY IN THE MUSIC WORLD DID YOU THINK YOU WOULD BE DOING SOMETHING LIKE THIS SEVEN YEARS DOWN THE LINE?

No, definitely not. I don’t think we ever thought we would have that many singles and definitely not enough to make a greatest hits album so it is a great achievement for us as a group.

WAS IT HARD TO PICK THE TRACKS THAT MADE UP YOUR GREATEST HITS ALBUM? No it wasn’t hard at all as this tour and album were planned at the right time so we could fit all our singles on so we didn’t have to pick and choose. There are also three new songs on there to provide a little treat to the fans.

WHAT HAVE BEEN YOUR FAVOURITE MOMENTS OF YOUR CAREER TO DATE? Getting to perform at Wembley was a big moment for all of us as we all grew up in London so that was a special moment. On top of that, getting to do the Comic Relief single was a great achievement for us because so many massive artists have done it before us.

IF YOU COULD GO BACK AND CHANGE ANYTHING FROM OVER YOUR CAREER WHAT WOULD IT BE? We have had some awful outfits! When you look back and think ‘what was I thinking’ with some of the clothes we wore but I guess it is all part of growing up and it gives everyone else a chance for a little laugh.

CAN YOU PUT INTO WORDS WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE COME THIS FAR AND TO HAVE SOLD OVER FIVE MILLION RECORDS AND HAD FOUR TOP TEN ALBUMS? No, not really! We have surpassed anything we could ever have managed to achieve and it is weird looking back and seeing how much has changed over seven years. We have achieved so much, when it’s actually happening you don’t realise what you are doing. With the Greatest Hits album coming out we have been able to look back and really take in what we have done.

WE KNOW THIS ISN’T THE END FOR THE SATURDAYS, BUT IF YOU COULD LOOK FURTHER AHEAD WHAT DO YOU THINK WILL BE THE FINISHING GOAL FOR THE GROUP? We want to keep going as long as possible especially whilst we are still enjoying it which we are at the moment. Everyone still gets on really well and we have still managed to get to do everything as a band as well as individually. There is no real end in sight at the moment.

WHICH CITIES DO YOU LOVE PLAYING THE MOST? We have found the further North you go the louder everyone gets and that is always really fun. The good thing about going on tour is you never really know what you are going to get. We are doing the same show every night but it does change as the crowds are different and are up for it in different ways.

WHEN YOU BEGAN YOUR MUSIC CAREERS DID YOU DO ANY UNIVERSITY GIGS? We did tons of University gigs all the time when we were starting out. They were always really good as they all came throughout Fresher weeks which were a good laugh as everyone was drunk and really enjoying themselves.

WHO WOULD BE THE DREAM BAND/ARTIST TO COLLABORATE WITH? It would have been wicked to do something with the Spice Girls back in the day just because as girls growing up they were who we idolised.

ANY PLANS TO RETURN TO THE UNITED STATES AFTER ACHIEVING WHAT YOU DID WHEN YOU WERE OVER THERE LAST YEAR? There are no current plans to return there anytime soon due to a number of reasons. We have three children, husbands and long term boyfriends throughout the group and we are real home girls as well. We really like being in England, we might go back to the US because we enjoyed every minute of it whilst we were over there, but we plan on spending more time here now.

WHAT’S THE FUNNIEST STORY YOU HAVE FROM YOUR TIME TOURING THE WORLD? Me and Rochelle dressed up as a horse once and went and mingled in the audience before our show started one night. We took photos with fans which was a good laugh for us as none of them realised it was us two in the costume.

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

TECHNOLOGIC PHIL HAMILTON

TECHNOLOGY EDITOR

GADGETS This month: PHONES WE ALL KNOW Apple are a bunch of B******ds when it comes to putting out iPhone upgrades every five minutes to iScrew our bank accounts. We’re now on iPhone model 246S, and despite a battery life that can only be described as S***, Apple have been the world champion of smartphones for years... But since Steve Jobs popped off to tech heaven a lot of other contenders have sprung up ready take the iPhone’s title. So who could become the new champ? Phil ‘The Hammer’ Hamilton is stepping in the ring to bash about the

best of the rest to see which can batter Apple. Maybe it’s time for us all to grow the balls to leave iPhones behind. Beyond the upgrades you feel forced to keep up with, don’t go into an Apple store if you want to keep cash in your account. Their sales reps wandering around holding little handsets will have you owing £2,000 before you know it. Here’s the other choices to give Tim Cook a boot in the stones. And if you don’t know who he is, look it up. On your iPhone.

PHONES & STUFF

GAMES

MOBILES

COMPUTERS

TABLETS

APPS

HTC ONE (M8)

Available from htc.com / RRP: £549.99 YES, IT’S PRICEY, but this is the handset that would lure me into ditching the iPhone. Like a top of the range of sports car it looks stunning, and what’s under the hood is just as impressive. I love the curved design of the aluminium body and the five-inch, full HD 1080x1920 pixel screen is perfect for watching films, TV and surfing the web. Its in-built Blink Feed news channel is brilliantly executed, pooling the best news from all over the world and web. You can also add any RSS feed you want and any social media posts. When you get into this feature you’ll find it hard to stay away. Battery life is very impressive for a phone that does so much and although the camera is only 4 megapixels the HTC One’s Duo Camera system (basically it has a depth sensor for clarity) means you can take amazing photos. And with the Dimension Plus feature you can make your images 3D. And in case you’ve forgotten, it still makes – and receives – phonecalls. TOP-RATED

EE KESTREL

Available from ee.co.uk / RRP: £99

SAMSUNG GALAXY K ZOOM Available from mobiles.co.uk / RRP: £399.95

AT FIRST this feels like a camera that thinks it’s a phone. It’s bulky in the hand due to the fact it has an optical lens that extends to 24mm. But what a camera – 10xoptical zoom with 20.7 megapixels BSI CMOS sensor. It really gives the best digital cameras on the market a run for their money. Let’s be honest, everyone’s taking pics and bloody selfies on phones anyway, so who carries a camera round with them? The rest of the handset is still very impressive – 4G, 1280x720 screen (almost full HD, although occasionally it can seem a bit fuzzy) with Android installed. Not as good as its stable mate the Galaxy S5 but still a very decent bit of kit. RATING

YOU WANT A SMARTPHONE but don’t fancy shelling out the best part of £500? Well, with the EE Kestrel you don’t have to. At just £99 it’s the cheapest smartphone on the market and still comes with 4G. Of course it doesn’t have all the bells and whistles and processing power of its more expensive and well-known rivals but, honestly, for this price, who cares? It’s fast to browse the web (you can stream Netflix very nicely) because of EE’s unique double-speed 4G network, the battery seems to last forever, it’s Android-loaded, the 5 megapixel camera has an LED flash and user-friendly camera app that works better in daylight than at night (but then maybe you shouldn’t be pulling out your phone every five minutes in the pub to take pics of yourself having a great time instead of drinking. You twats.) It doesn’t have a true HD screen and blahblahblah. I’m getting sick of listing all this bullshit for things that were invented to send texts and take calls. But basically, I like this no-nonsense smartphone. If I was being whimsical I’d say it’s the Ronseal of the market. It does what it says on the tin. It isn’t a rip-off. And its battery – unlike the Apple iCuntS – lasts longer than the length of two PornHub clips. RATING

IF YOU’RE IN have been on all over this the heart firs Available from various retailers most excitin RRP: £229.99 It includes THIS MIDDLE-MARKET SMART- creates some PHONE is just a bit, well, meh. experience n The design is not particularly it’s the dogs beautiful, its 720-resolution I’m sure m screen just doesn’t appear that iar with the H clear on the Archos’ five-inch Xbox 360 mu screen, left, and the 8-megapixel the develope camera is, to be blunt, turd. who are resp But 4G works well, it has 8GB Yes, once of storage space, it’s pre-loaded some of the with Android Jelly Bean, has 1GB become appa of RAM and the battery lasts for way grenade ages as long as you don’t spend to the Maste all day gaming or streaming porn. Destiny is To be blunt this handset is like after a catacl the chubby girl with the mousey of Earth and brown hair dancing in the night- of the last ci club 30 minutes before it shuts... As well as momentarily tempting but you and maim on can definitely do better. ancient ruin And you’ll regret it if you take galactic gang her home. The story quest to recl Golden Age i RATING Halo veter really sensat Spartan to su to what you c Well, Bung ter-customis There is a on a characte Those of y house with s will be able t tomising aw The way yo you so wish y online comm will be packe As well as special ment which are a r there is virtu

ARCHOS 50 HELIUM 4G

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

TRANSFORMERS

TOASTIE MAKERS

HEADPHONES

SPEAKERS

GAMES

LAPTOPS

NIGHT VISION GOGGLES

DRONES

VUVUZELAS

PREVIEW: WWE 2K15

‘It’s boring and irritating when you see players flying through the air like armour-clad birds from the slow-motion bits of The Matrix’

Last year 2K Sports acquired the much sought-after WWE license and a year on from the excellent WWE 2K14 we are just a couple of months away from their next matt-slamming effort. Although WWE ‘Superman’ John Cena is the cover star, the most exciting piece of news we’ve had from 2K is that wrestling legend Sting (pity his name is stained by that tantric numpt) is to be a playable character for the first time ever in a WWE game – if you pre-order.For those of you not aware why this is exciting I’ll tell you why. Sting is considered one the greatest wrestlers of all time but has never wrestled for the biggest wrestling company, instead cementing his legacy in the NWA (National Wrestling Alliance – I hate typing out the full meanings of acronyms, FFS, but I will so noone can whinge they

REVIEW OF THE MONTH

don’t understand these wrestling terms – even though you should), WCW (World Championship Wrestling and the company that nearly put WWE – World Wrestling Entertainment – out of business in the mid to late ’90s) and most recently TNA (Total Non-Stop Action Wrestling.) This is a BIG deal. Sting’s appearance is believed to be part of the rumoured Attitude-era mode which will allow players to relive the greatest matches from the Monday Night Wars in the ’90s from both WWE and WCW. Other game types expected to be included are an updated Universe mode which allows you to book your own WWE shows and pay-per-view extravaganzas. There’s also said to a revamped WrestleMania mode where you recreate the biggest matches in the show’s history. Other confirmed playable characters include current super-stars such as Bray Wyatt, Roman Reigns and Daniel Bryan as well as a host of legends such as Hulk Hogan, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Honky Tonk Man and Sycho Sid Eudy. I personally can’t wait for this game and got so excited writing this I decided to don Lycra pants and bodyslam all of my kids on the floor. As The Hulkster would say, “Whatcha gonna do when WWE2K15 runs wild on you!” Drink a long, tall glass of shut up juice and get playing. OUT: OCTOBER 31 ON PLAYSTATION 4, PLAYSTATION 3, XBOX ONE, XBOX 360 AND PC.

DESTINY: BETA IF YOU’RE INTO YOUR GAMES then Destiny will have been on your radar for some time. ‘ve been all over this heart-pumping, adrenaline shot in the heart first-person shooter – arguably the most exciting release of the year. It includes all the best tricks of the genre but creates something unique to provide a gaming experience not easily forgotten. To put it simply it’s the dogs’ bollocks. I’m sure most of you reading this will be familiar with the Halo games that made the Xbox and Xbox 360 must-have consoles, and it is Bungie, the developer behind that blockbuster series, who are responsible for Destiny. Yes, once you get a few hours into playing some of the similarities between the two titles become apparent but these are a good thing – the way grenades are wielded owe a special thank you to the Master Chief. Destiny is set in our solar system in the future after a cataclysmic event has changed the course of Earth and you play as one of the “Guardians” of the last city on the battered planet. As well as being able to shoot, kill and maim on Earth you can also explore the ancient ruins of our solar system – grab a gun you galactic gangster – we’re shooting up Venus. The story mode really is engrossing and your quest to reclaim what was lost in mankind’s Golden Age is as compelling as any sci-fi movie. Halo veterans will know the online mode was really sensational. You could customise your Spartan to suit your wishes but there were limits to what you could change. Well, Bungie has brought us a limitless character-customisation game here. There is a limit to what I have time to change on a character (or be bothered to.) Those of you yet to get hitched or fill your house with screaming snot-spewing mini-me’s will be able to spend your ample free time customising away in the style of role-playing games. The way you can play online has changed too. If you so wish you can play the story mode with the online community – which if you’re unlucky will be packed with loads of whiny Americans. As well as the Solo or Co-operative story (and special mention for the cinematic sequences which are a revolution in game development as there is virtually no loss of graphics from game-

play mode), other online game modes include Strike, Crucible and Tower. Tower is less of a mode but more of an area where you can hang out with other players to forge alliances, create special forces and upgrade guns and items. What is very appealing about the game is that it is very easy to jump into and start playing and it soon draws you into the beautifully rendered world. It also isn’t the type of game where you will die

over and over again which for me just becomes fucking annoying. I really have just one minor gripe with Destiny and that is how your character jumps (as I said – minor. But I’m still going to gripe about it.) I know it’s dull as shit to quibble about ingame physics but your Guardian just jumps too bloody high and takes too long to land. It’s boring and irritating when you see players flying through the air like armour-clad birds from the slow-motion bits of The Matrix. Regardless of my jumping angst this is a musthave title. And the world agrees. Almost 5 million people played the PlayStation 4 and PlayStation 3 Betas – so, and I never thought I’d say this, go and join everyone else. They’re right on this one.

RATING: 5/5 (TESTED ON PS4 BETA) AVAILABLE FROM SEPTEMBER 9 ON PLAYSTATION 4, PLAYSTATION 3, XBOX ONE AND XBOX 360.

PREVIEW: PROJECT SPARK MICROSOFT’S GAME-CHANGING ‘GAME MAKER’ title will hit shelves in October and I’ve been getting to grips with the good and the bad aspects of the title. The premise of Project Spark is that you create 3-D worlds in which you are boundless in what you want to create. Basically you can make the game you dreamed to make, but never had the power to do so. In Project Spark you have a terrain which you can sculpt and mould into a complex world. You can add your choice of foliage and animals, and make an environment like no other. Want to get Robin Hood to fight a giant overlord of Planet Piñata? Then you’re in luck. Just pop it in there. It’s like playing a god. You have logic too. A game would not be fun if

it had no va-va-voom. That’s why things need to have “scripts”. Project Spark is very close to real-life game development where you use ‘what if statements’ and so many more complexities I was never arsed to do a computer science degree to learn. Project Spark is complex in scripting logic which is so simple to learn it really does set up the average gamer up for programming in the future. Then comes the bad bit... Project Spark is too similar to the original IP of this genre of play, create, share, Little Big Planet which is due for another sequel this year. Project Spark is enthusiastic in its premise and of course it’s aimed more at teens and adults, but it’s going to be in the shadow of Little Big Planet unless the users get to grips with all the options Spark allows.

LIKE OUR FACEBOOK PAGE FOR A

CHANCE TO

WIN

£2000 WORTH OF APPLE PRODUCTS 13” Macbook Pro | iPad Retina | iPhone 5S | iPod Touch

facebook.com/TheUniPaper

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

CURRENT

» CONTINUED FROM FRONT COVER

DON’T THROW AWAY YOUR LIFE...

THE THREE BEST YEARS OF YOUR LIFE

The story all starts with a night out in Manchester. Walking home with friends, he spots a roadside bin with its front hatch open, a very rare sight and one that he could not refuse taking advantage of. Now would be a good time to add that memorable stories don’t come without friends there to witness them or in this case be the reason behind the incident. As Robin climbed inside the open hatch his housemates, who were slightly tipsy, kicked the door closed as a joke. Now the victim might well say he would have done the same to them if they were in that position but unfortunately for Robin the door to the bin automatically locked. The rescue mission was now on.

the judgement. Of course, there are certain drawbacks to having that many sexual partners. Indeed, if you’re plagued by an itchy, burning sensation, then you might be studying in Nottingham, where gonorrhoea’s truly gone viral, or Birmingham, which tops our metaphorical league table for chlamydia in 18-25s. Of course, the real question is how much it costs to get a drink. There are lots of figures floating around, but the same HSBC report that declared Leicester the cheapest university in the country also declared that Leeds was the cheapest place to drink, with five pints of beer or two bottles of wine costing only £12. But who’re the biggest drinkers? It’s not a cheap city, by any means, but that honor goes to Bath. According to the most recent University Drinking League Table by Student Beans, Bath Spa students drink a liver-melting 26.3 units of alcohol a week on average. For reference, the Department of Health recommends that men drink no more than 21 units a week, and women no more than 14. Newcastle has been crowned as one of the UK’s leading tourist attractions. Sure, it’s a beautiful city - but time and time again, what people return for is the city’s nightlife. In fact, Tripadvisor users have voted Newcastle as the seventh best place for nights out in the world.

“We kicked the door closed and it stuck! We’ve all tried pulling the door at the same and we’ve tried tipping it,” Robin’s friend Jack Tame can be heard saying on the video. With their efforts coming up short, they didn’t know what else to do other than call the fire brigade. Cat’s stuck in trees is the usual joke task that fire fighters are linked with but students stuck in bins takes that to a whole new level. With his friends laughing on and Robin shaking hands with people outside of the bin, the firemen arrived. Like any good rescue service they knew exactly what was needed for the job straight away. Producing a little tool from their truck, they opened the bin with ease much to the delight of Robin. Finally able to stand up again, Robin’s first act was to give his rescuers a big hug to say thanks for their efforts. And now his ordeal has realised instant fame as his video has hit the internet ensuring his embarrassing story will be remembered by more than just a select few friends. Unfortunately for Robin (and possibly for the image of students across the land), that isn’t the only story of a student getting stuck in an object in recent time. And this American student’s ordeal saw him stuck in something much stranger than a bin on the side of a street. Tubingen, Germany was the setting for another firefighter rescue, 22 of them required to remove a student from 32-ton stone vagina. Yes you read that right as outside Tubingen University’s institute for microbiology and virology stands a sculpture that artist Fernando de la Jara reveals is meant to signify ‘the gateway to the world’. However, one student decided it would be a good idea (for whatever reason but I hope it was a dare) to jump inside the artwork, only to get himself stuck. A few adjustments and not long later, the student was free, accompanied by a story he won’t want to be telling his family anytime soon. University is a time for embarrassing stories to take place that you hope will never see the light of day. But at least we can rest safely in the knowledge that no matter what we do in our time away from home, there are always people out there that go the extra mile to make sure our embarrassing moments don’t seem as bad.

...but at least he wasn’t this guy...

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

Fashion ESSENTIALS

SASKIA QUIRKE

FASHION EDITOR

Women WELL HEELED

These booties wont keep your toes warm but they will look good.

GET LIPPY

BOOTS, £55, MISS SELFRIDGE

Perfect for puckering up, this balm leave lips super soft and tastes good too

LIP BALM, £8, OLIVER BONAS

ZIP IT

Tick off two of this season’s biggest trends, leather and texture, with this biker

BIKER JACKET, £85, H! BY HENRY HOLLAND AT DEBENHAMS

JUST PEACHY This simple boxy cut is classic with a colourful twist

COAT, £44.99 NEW LOOK

PRINTS CHARMING

print and Take one pretty t collar. add a statemen ve? The What do you ha ent shift. tem sta ultimate

DRESS, £10, PRIMARK

FLOWER POWER Because every lip gloss and mascara deserves a fashionable home

MAKE-UP BAG, £12, CATH KIDSON

ARM CANDY

This chic bargain bag looks like it should costs three times its price tag

GREY BAG, £29, ACCESSORIZE

HIGH SHINE

E STAPeLblouse g a STYLE t d a vin row-

d h Just a easy t for an or tee d go outfit 8, an SS, £3 it-on E DRE

S ARE DUNG HY PERKIN T O DOR

CLUTCH CONTROL

This popping pink bag adds the perfect punch to any LBD

BAG, £35, MISS SELFRIDGE

The sweatshirt gets modern makeov er with this sequin numb er

SWEATSHIRT, £6 9, HOUSE OF FRAS ER

T STATEMEN S T R SHO age print. vint We love this w bare legs no Wear with d tights for ad st ju d an winter.

, SHORTS, £34 TOPSHOP

OES DE StHo boys E U S BLUE alternative f the irls ar o The g ootwe have f onk shoe must m n, the seaso ,

, £50 SHOES OP H S P O T

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

TOP TIP : WOMEN

TOP TIP : MEN

FLORAL FANCY

COOL KICKS

Statement necklace that will make even the most simple tee wow

This new navy, slate, silver and neon orange colourway makes these these perfect autumn trainer.

NECKLACE, £29, ACCESSORIZE

TRAINERS, £105, NIKE

Half mac, half parka, we love this simple but stylish coat.

COAT, £65, NEXT

MEN

ESSENTIALS

WINTER WARMER

GLOSS FINISH

Paint your lips pink with a slick of this from Stila and it will stay all day

LIP GLOSS, £18, STILA

LEATHER LUXE

Cos accessories for guys make the perfect gift. This bracelet is one for the birthday list

BRACELET, £10, COS

THE WEEKENDER BUTTON UP

From paisley to polka dot to mountain prints, Topman has put its stamp on this autumn’s shirts.

SHIRT, £45, NEW LOOK

This handsome holdall means you’ll arrive at any destination in style

HOLDALL, £50, F&F AT TESCO

POP A CAP ON IT MONOCHROME MUST-HAVE Houndstooth, quilted, black and white - all in one bomber jacket. What’s not to love?

JACKET, £65.99, ZARA

BLUE HUE CHECK MATE

Snap up this tee for the easiest way to work the check trend.

This bright blue cable knit jumper is a real steal.

THE LITTLE YELLOW BOOK

PUFFER UP

Quilted gillets and coats are back. Welcome back the Nineties in this Zara number

oys e to b e h t f ro shoe

CAP, £8.99, NEW LOOK

JUMPER, £35 BURTON

T-SHIRT, £18, NEXT

S SHOE

This marble effect snapback is finished off with a cool Airtex style design

Hungover? In desperate need of carbs? This book will help you whip up the perfect hangover cure.

BOOK, £8, BURTON

GILLET, £49.99, ZARA

MAN BAG

CONTRAST COLLAR

SKATER SHOES

DENIM JACKET, BOOHOO

SHOES, £59, COS

For an on trend denim jacket opt for a sheepskin effect collar

Simple slip-ons are still going strong this season. Comfy and stylish.

Keep it understated with this grey backpack with contrast straps. Less is more.

BACKPACK, £25, BURTON

ADVICE

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

NO-NONSENSE ADVICE THAT MAKES A DIFFERENCE

Second Year: We’re not Freshers Anymore Job Hunting For Final Year

Students DANIEL ROBBINS

Coming to the end of your ﬁnal year? Worrying about how to put yourself in the best possible position to walk out into a job? Then fear no more as we have compiled a list of some of the best tips to get onto the job ladder, but with a twist. Anyone can tell you to get experience, to be punctual or to have your CV in order. But what can you do to set yourself apart from the rest? Look no further than these three handy tips below!

1 AS YOUR UNIVERSITY OPENS its floodgates to another wave of Freshers that are young, dumb and full of the joys of spring, second year students prepare to face a different reality. This year actually counts towards your degree so it’s time to shake off your bad first year habits if you want a degree classification that doesn’t share its name with a South African bishop. Firstly, you actually have to attend lectures this year. We’ve all been guilty of skipping lectures after telling ourselves “it’s only one lecture – I’ll catch up” although we never do! You can be almost certain your lecturer will be wearing those beige trousers but you can’t be certain of what important information he is going to share with you so force yourself out of bed and go!

Secondly, writing that 4000 word essay the night before the deadline on a heart-attack inducing concoction of Red Bull and ProPlus is no longer going to cut it. You need to plan and organise your coursework more so than your nights out this year. Thirdly, you need to find out where the library is. Note – it’s not in the Student Union’s bar. It’s alright to enjoy your life (you’re not a third year quite yet!) but make sure you’re actually doing the reading and studying as you’ll find it difficult to blag your way through second year. Finally, you must of course develop a hatred of Freshers as they waltz around uni without a care in the world!

CLUB DRUG CLINIC LAURA RAPHAELS

Taking drugs is nothing GBL is used to clean car wheel

trims, however if ingested it can give a high similar to alcohol and increase sex drive. It is a colourless and tasteless liquid that can be swallowed or injected. Withdrawal symptoms can last up to 15 days after the last dose, and it is easy to OD on GBL as there is not much difference in the amount required to get high or slip into a coma.

MEPHEDRONE, branded

meow meow by the media, is a stimulant that can give a similar high to amphetamines such as speed and ecstasy. It is a white powder that can be swallowed, injected or snorted and the effects last for about an hour. When the drug first emerged on the internet dealers marketed it as “plant food” or “bath salts” to get around the law, however it was made illegal in 2010. Some users refer to it as meph, but should not be confused with meth.

NITROUS OXIDE, more

commonly known as laughing gas, can give a relaxed and euphoric feeling when inhaled. It is not illegal and users have taken to openly inhaling the gas using balloons, however local authorities have started to seize canisters from users distributing or taking the drug in public places. There is a concern users believe it is a safe legal high, without acknowledging that it can cause oxygen deprivation resulting in loss of blood pressure, fainting and heart attacks.

BE MEMORABLE If you get the chance to do work experience in your respective ﬁeld don’t just turn up and just get by every day. Do something memorable! Pitch ideas to your boss and leave them at the end of a week remembering you by something out of the ordinary that you did for them. Add your quirky experiences where you have shown leadership or another crucial quality to your CV as well to make your piece of paper stand out from the rest.

BUILD CONTACTS A rather straight forward one but an important factor nonetheless. A follow on from the point above, if you make yourself memorable more people will take notice of you in the work place. Don’t be a shrinking violet, shake as many hands, get as many names and contacts as humanly possible in a week, you never know when they could come in handy.

BE PERSISTENT Continuing on from building contacts, you need to keep in touch with them in numerous ways. Drop them an email every couple of weeks, drop into the oﬃce where they work or give them a call. It may seem like you are being annoying but employers like someone who is proactive and all these points show you are just that.

First Class Honours Closer Than You Think DANIEL ROBBINS

PICTURE CREDIT: SHUTTERSTOCK

First Class Honours! What an achievement that can be after three or four years of hard work. But that is just what is needed; hard work. It isn’t going to come easy. Luckily for you there are some tips to follow to make the achievement more manageable. The first point you need to consider is that you can’t just wait until the last year to work hard as you won’t achieve what you are hoping for. That’s not to say you have to live in the library and not go out during every year at University, you just need to strike the right balance. You have to break down your hard work over your entire course. If you manage good grades in year one, work will become easier in the years to follow. It is simple really. Planning for your final grade come graduation begins in the first year. Getting into good habits early on is a must so whatever the exam, class test or coursework you do, aim to get the best grade you can! The feedback you get from your work, alongside the grades, are brilliant indicators early on as to where you are in University based tests. From there you have two or three years to improve and gradually work your way up to getting firsts on mock tests. So there you have it, preparation is key and if you get in to good habits early on, First Class Honours could be closer than you think!

The relat univ Carr you med who don thou

e after three d; hard re some tips

ust wait at you are ry and not trike the

ire course. If easier in the

in the first ever the st grade you

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

RELATIONSHIPS:

Are you about to go all the way? LAURA RAPHAEL

PICTURE CREDIT SHUTTERSTOCK

There are two types of long distance relationships at university. One that makes university ever better and one that turns you into Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City. Suddenly you are a paranoid wreck, stalking their social media into the small hours and wondering just who is that girl in all your boyfriend’s pictures. And don’t worry the boys are just as possessive, even though they wouldn’t readily admit it. If you are currently faced with the long distance dilemma we have three relationship saving tips:

Communication:

You are going to be meeting a whole new group of people, getting to know a whole new city and perhaps toasting this with a drink or two. Not to rades, are rsity based mention the information overload from lectures. e and gradu- But don’t get too caught up in your new life that you forget to keep in touch with your other half. in to good you think!

Hanging out:

This is especially important if they are not going to university, they will start to feel that they are not part of your life and once that thought process begins, the drifting apart starts. Don’t forget to have a laugh, relationships are fun not a chore. Make them a part of your new routine, plan weekends together just don’t squander your train fare in the SU beforehand.

Work at it:

Over the next three years you and your other half are going to change. You can grow together but this is something you need to work on and more importantly never give up on.

Don’t Put the

STD in STuD PAIGE WILLIAMS

PICTURE CREDIT: SHUTTERSTOCK

Uni is a time for having fun but just make sure it’s good, clean fun. Remember you came to uni to get a degree, not an STD. SEX IS CLEANER WITH A PACKAGED WIENER. If you’re not 100 per cent certain about where your sexual partner has been then it’s always best to be on the safe side. Sex with a condom/femidom might not feel as good as skin-on-skin but catching chlamydia feels a lot worse. Also, DO NOT open them with your teeth. You may have seen it in a ﬁlm and you may think that it’s sexy (it’s not), but doing this could cause you to break or tear the latex so just open it with your hands like a civilised human being instead of a sex-crazed animal. ORAL SEX ISN’T SAFE SEX. STD’s can still be transmitted through oral sex but the risk is reduced by the use of a condom or dental dam. You might be put oﬀ as this can make the act less enjoyable but nobody will want to kiss you after if you’ve got gonorrhoea on your face. If you still aren’t sold then google facial herpes - it’s not good. CHECK YOURSELF BEFORE YOU WRECK YOURSELF. Not all STDs have visible symptoms so don’t just assume you’re STD-free because nothing’s oozing or hurting. If you do have unprotected sex, be sure to visit your local sexual health clinic for a screening. It’s easy, quick, and free and they’ve seen it all before.

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

MY MONEY

IMPARTIAL, EXPERT ADVICE

Peter Jones

How to budget your money

FROM STUDENT TO MENTOR

LAURA RAPHAEL

DANIEL ROBBINS

Your student loan is probably not only the biggest amount of money you have ever seen but someone has just given it to you. Not to mention, as part of your student bank account you are now the proud owner of an overdra and possibly even a credit card. First of all, don’t get too excited. You are going to have to pay it all back, with interest. But you can make that money go a long way and there are money saving apps, free ones at that.

mySuperList

You’ll probably only appreciate this when you are eating pasta everyday, but to save you to getting to that point, mySuperList enables you not only to draw up a shopping list, but it will tell you how much you should expect to fork out for it and which is the cheapest supermarket to go to.

Vouchercloud

Come deadline day you’ll want to treat yourself and here is how to do it on the cheap. Vouchercloud uses GPS technology to root out all the deals and discounts going in your area. All you have to do is select the ones you like the look off and download them straight to your phone.

OnTrees

You know it has got bad when instead of checking your bank balance you simply pray that the transaction goes through. Don’t. Set up a budget and OnTrees will then keep tabs on all your incomings and outgoings so you can see how closely you are sticking to it.

Coupon Queen Saves Thousands of Pounds Do you like to think of yourself as a bit of a bargain hunter? A super scrimper, perhaps? Well, Maddy Tooke from Essex is here to put you to shame. The 26-year-old student has managed to save over a whopping £22,000 a year by using coupons! Maddy Tooke first starting using coupons when she left her £22,000-a-year job in the army and began to worry about how her and her husband would survive on just one wage. The 26-year-old super saver said: “When I gave up my job to study sports I was really worried about giving up the lifestyle my husband and I had become used to. We didn’t live the life of luxury but we enjoyed meals out, liked to decorate the house and I enjoyed shopping. But when I started looking into ways to save money I couldn’t believe how easy it was. Now I can’t believe I ever paid full price for anything.” Some of Maddy’s greatest savings include booking an all-inclusive sevennight holiday to Ibiza for just over £300, decorating her bathroom for £8.85 and saving £120 a week on food! The ex-medic said she started by looking at her food bill which came to

PAIGE WILLIAMS

around £150 a week: “I was shocked and realised it was down to us not planning meals and further wasting money by buying what we fancied rather than what was on offer. I started by buying food in multibuys and freezing it.” “I also googled voucher codes for products and supermarkets and printed them to use at the checkout. By doing this I got our food bill down to £30 a week.” Maddy also signed up to a variety of different online groups and recommends Extreme Couponing. “Another one is Ten Ways to Have More Money as a Student without Working. People give each other lots of advice on brands which have good savings that month or websites with the best vouchers — it’s amazing how much is out there”. It looks like even the tightest of us could learn a trick or two from Maddy! Extreme Couponing here I come!

STUDENT

DEALS DANIEL ROBBINS

Freshers, you will soon learn that an NUS card is your best friend (if you don’t already know). If you haven’t got one then it is a must over the ﬁrst couple of weeks and here are three reasons why.

If those ﬁrst few weeks are too stressful for you, why not go on a holiday? Even better why not get £65 off already discounted holidays? Well by using your NUS card at Student Universe you can do just that and travel to places such as Paris, New York or Sydney. What could be better?

If you are looking for something closer to home, who doesn’t love money off food, and pizza in particular? Well with your card you can get a 40% discount off your food and drink at Pizza Hut all day Monday and Tuesday.

Finally, a little more boring than the other two but you have to stock up on the essentials. That’s why the 12.5% discount you get at Rymans stationery will be vital for all students, whether it be for note cards or anything else, this is one that will come in handy all the time.

Dragon’s Den is an iconic show. Whether you know all the Dragons oﬀ by heart or just watch the show thinking of crazy ideas you could pitch, it is a programme that most would know a lot about. However, the stories of the people sat in the chairs opposite are often not as well known. Take Peter Jones for example. His journey is definitely one worth following. An avid tennis player, he would help a coach at his local school teach tennis whilst he was on his summer breaks. After four years, he decided it was his time to turn coach, opening his own academy at the age of 16 showing his first move from student to mentor. Like any businessman he has had his lows, but where he is now is certainly not one of them. Employing more than 1,000 people and generating sales of more than £250 million in the companies he has interest in, the Dragon’s Den show is just the start of the array of talents Jones has. When he isn’t focusing on his business ventures, he is ensuring that a further line of entrepreneurs follow him into the field. With Peter Jones Enterprise Academy’s in Amsterdam and Manchester, Jones is backing up his myth that entrepreneurs are born and not made. The example of his success story is no better example and don’t expect him to be falling away at any point soon.

Dragon’s Den show is just the start of the array of talents Jones has.

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

YOUR QUESTIONS: ANSWERED How To Spend Less on a Night Out

PAIGE WILLIAMS

NIGHTS OUT are expensive but they also come with the territory of being a university student so The University Paper has compiled a list of things you can do to save a few more pounds of your student loan. Drink at home before you go to the club. You can get a 70cl bottle of vodka for a tenner at Tesco. Yes, it might look and taste a bit like paint stripper, but student nights out aren’t about fancy drinks and hor d’oeuvres – they’re about getting drunk enough to tolerate the grungy dive that you plan on visiting later in the night. Don’t buy food on the way home. I know you usually crave carbs on your walk home, but food joints are risky places if you’re trying to save money. You go in with the intention to buy chips for a couple of quid and end up with a seven pound doner kebab which is bigger than your own head. You’re better off raiding the supermarket before you go out so you can commit a much cheaper carbocide when you return home. And you don’t have to sit on a cold bench trying to avoid eye contact with the homeless and shooing seagulls as you eat (or maybe you do, I don’t know how unlucky you were with your accommodation). Wear the same outfit you wore last time. Honestly, it’s fine. You’re going to get booze/food/sick (not necessarily your own or in that order) on it anyway, so why shell out for a nice new outfit that will just get ruined? The student population is very forgiving and if that hipster kid in your seminar can wear the same too-big jumper every week then you can go out wearing that top again (just make sure you wash it first).

Top Student Bank Account Options DANIEL ROBBINS

PICTURE CREDIT: SHUTTERSTOCK

ONE OF THE HOT topics before you join a University is what bank account to go with. Rather than looking at the freebies a bank might offer, the account with the largest interest free overdraft is where you should first look. Overdrafts are part and parcel of being a student and should be the main factor when you are choosing a bank. So which is the best bank to choose?

» SANTANDER - Best known for their adverts involved sports stars such as Jenson Button, Jessica Ennis and Rory McIl-

roy, Santander offer one of the best value student accounts. With a 0% overdraft of up to £1,500 and an added incentive of a four year 16-25 railcard, they are one of the first you should be looking at.

» HSBC - One of the highest overdrafts advertised plus some tasty incentives, HSBC is next in the pecking order. With a 0% overdraft of up to £3,000 dependent on credit score and a free £60 Amazon voucher upon sign up, they run Santander a close second in terms of value. They also don’t allow you spend beyond

your arranged overdraft, the only student account that does this which means you don’t risk huge overdrawn charges. Bonus!

» THE CO-OPERATIVE - Despite having their well aired problems, the Co-Operative bank do offer a good student account. They have up to a £2,000 interest free overdraft. not as high as some others, but more students have said that they get close to the full amount by the time they have finished. No freebies to talk of but remember it is all about the overdraft.

RUNNING YOUR OWN BUSINESS EASIER THAN EVER BEFORE

Getting a job straight after University is the Holy Grail for all students, but what if you could guarantee yourself employment and be your own boss at the same time? Sounds brilliant doesn’t it. Many people don’t see it as a viable option after they have finished their studies but forming your own business is easier now than ever before. A quick search in google and there are plenty of sites where students can get loans in a bid to turn business ideas launched into fully operating businesses. Take Enterprise Inc for example. Their aim is to improve the entrepreneurial skills of students who have recently graduated or are in their final year of study. To do this they offer a number of bursary options dependent on eligibility. New businesses are vital for the economy and that is why there is so much help out there for budding young entrepreneurs. Enterprise Inc offers a potential £5,000 support package for students that are willing to pitch a business idea to them. Offers don’t just stop at Enterprise either! The government has their very own website dedicated to start up loans as do companies such as HSBC, Barclays and Virgin. Surely we have all had that one idea that we have wanted to try out and if you are really serious about

New businesses are vital for the economy and that is why there is so much help out there for budding young entrepreneurs.

setting up a business help is out there, you just have to know where to look. So dust off your suit, form an idea & pitch it to a company. You never know where you could end up!

www.unipaper.co.uk www.facebook.com/theunipaper www.twitter.com/theunipaper

FIND US ONLINE

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

STUDENT CHEF

PICTURE:SHUTTERSTOCK

How not to poison yourself or your flatmates

Food safety might not be your top priority when you go to university but it is extremely useful to know all the rules and regulations prior to cooking either for just you or your housemate because at the end of the day you don’t want to poison your housemates. It may sound like a boring subject but it’s worth acquainting yourself with the basics. STORE FOOD CORRECTLY - Don’t store fresh and cooked meat side by side in the fridge or put fresh meat or fish where it can drip on to cooked food below. WASH THOSE HANDS! - Always wash your hands with soap thoroughly before starting to prepare food. And dry them with a hand towel rather than your tea towel that may be dirty.

DON’T PUT WARM FOOD IN THE FRIDGE - If you cook something to eat later or have food left over, cool it then refrigerate it as it could warm up the fridge thus making other food uneatable.

REHEAT FOOD THOROUGHLY - If you’re going to eat it hot always reheat it thoroughly which means bringing it to the boil and simmering it for at least a couple of minutes.

WASH UTENSILS Wash any utensils or chopping boards that you have used for preparing raw meat before using them for anything else.

PUT FOOD IN THE FRIDGE ASAP! Refrigerate fresh food as soon as you can after buying it. Don’t lug it round warm lecture rooms or leave it in the car.

USE BY DATES - Some products, such as fish or mince, go off quicker than others and should be eaten within a day of buying them. Products such as cheese or yoghurt have a sell-by date: Use it! TOP TIP IF IN DOUBT, CHUCK IT OUT.

TOP

FREEZER TO FRIDGE Don’t refreeze frozen food that has thawed.

EASY MEALS

FAJITAS

OMELETTE

FILLED JACKET POTATO

BURGERS

TOAD IN THE HOLE

With money tighter than ever before for the British student, it might not be such a bad idea for the old overdraft if you start making your own home meals an steer clear of the fast food and microwave meals. Here are 5 great ideas to get you started. They are all ludicrously easy to make, none of them require special equipment or training, and they may just save you some money!

● Chop an onion, red pepper and two chicken breasts and chop in to thin strips. ● Put together in a bowl with one teaspoon of paprika and some salt and pepper. ● Make your homemade salsa. After leaving to marinade for a few minutes, cook in a pre-heated pan for about 10 minutes. ● Warm your flour tortillas in the microwave. ● Serve with your home-made salsa, grated cheddar, sour cream and guacamole (you could even make your own homemade guacamole!)

● Mix two eggs with two tablespoons of milk ● Add some salt and pepper for flavouring. ● Heat some butter in a frying pan and add the egg mixture. ● After one minute, stir and reduce heat. ● Sprinkle your chosen ingredients (e.g. bacon, peppers,onions) onto the surface and wait for the omelette to set underneath. ● Sprinkle with cheese and then cook for two to three minutes. ● Then simply fold in half and serve.

● Wash the potato and prick with a fork. ● Rub salt evenly on the potato. ● Place in a pre-heated oven at 220C and cook for about 45 minutes until the potato skin is crisp. ● Cut open and accompany with your filling of choice e.g. Cheese, beans, coleslaw, salad, sour cream, chilli con carne, whatever you can get your hands on basically!

● Mix some minced beef (500g) in to a bowl with some salt and pepper with your hands or a spoon ● Dice a small onion and tip into a bowl alongside one egg. ● Roll the mixture into four balls and flatten to make burger-shaped patties. ● Put on a plate and cover and leave in the fridge to firm up for about 30 minutes. ● Cooking for about 15 mins Serve in a seeded bun with salad and any toppings that you desire! E.g. Cheese, bacon, the list is endless…

● Tip 115g plain flour into a mixing bowl. Add salt and pepper. ● Slowly add three eggs and 285ml milk, whisking as you go to create a smooth batter. ● Put some oil into a baking tin and place in the oven at its highest temperature. ● Add eight sausages and cook until lightly golden. ● Pour batter over the sausages & put back in the oven. Remove from the oven when the batter has risen and is golden and crisp. ● Serve with veg & onion gravy for the perfect Sunday lunch1

Now put down the Old El Paso packets and try this traditional homemade recipe. It is so easy and you can even control your spice levels by doing it home made. This recipe is for two:

Always a winner and its healthy! An omelette is quick and easy and can be tailored specifically to your tastes. Simply follow these instructions and you’re well on your way to a healthy diet:

Jacket potatoes are extremely easy but so many people manage to mess this one up. We would recommend waiting for the perfect jacket potato by cooking it in the oven...

We love burgers! Why go out and spend £12 each when you make your own gourmet burgers at home with all the trimmings and added extras. This recipe will serve four people:

Toad in the hole has to be one of our best dishes Britain has created! Get your housemates together and cook this one to feed four! The recipe below is to feed four students!

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

The Top Five Strangest Foods PAIGE WILLIAMS

PICTURE: SHUTtERSTOCK

World’s Most Expensive Food and Drink PAIGE WILLIAMS

PICTURE: SHUTtERSTOCK

Kopi Luwak, INDONESIA, £240/lbs Kopi Luwak, otherwise known as “cat poo coffee” (yes, you read that correctly) is the most expensive coffee in the world at £18 a cup. It’s made by collecting beans from the droppings of a cat-like creature called a civet. Tasty! Yet somehow I can’t see girls Instagramming their #catpoocoffee from Starbucks anytime soon.

Martini, NEW YORK, £6070 What’s the best way to wash down some of the most expensive food in the world? With a £6070 martini, of course! How do you like yours? Shaken? Stirred? How about with a diamond? The Algonquin Hotel in New York works with an inhouse jeweller to create a customisable diamond which is placed in the martini. James Bond, eat your heart out!

Strawberries Arnaud NEW ORLEANS, £2.4 MILLION Arnaud’s is a restaurant in New Orleans that ﬁrst gained notoriety for its £850,000 dessert but that dessert is now worth a jaw-dropping £2.4 million! This is because the original 4.71 carat ring that used to accompany the strawberries served in a marinade of port has been replaced by a 7.09 carat pink diamond. The co-owner of Arnaud’s commented that “needless to say, it is our worst selling dessert.”

Hot dog, NEW YORK, £1,400 A restaurant in New York, 230 Fifth, put all hot dog vans to shame when it released its £1,400 creation made out of 60-day dry-aged wagyu (Japanese cow) and topped with Vidalia onions caramelized in Dom Perignon, sauerkraut braised in Cristal, and caviar.

FUGU,

JAPAN - Fugu is Japanese for poisonous sea-devil. Only kidding, it means pufferfish, but it can be lethal if its toxic parts are not removed correctly. Only highly trained chefs are allowed to handle them and over twenty people have died in Japan after eating the fish since 2000. Seafood with a sprinkling of possible death? Sounds delicious.

PUFFIN HEART

, ICELAND Us Brits are supposed to have the heart of a lion. Well, in Iceland they apparently have hearts of puffins – and they eat them. The books of my childhood suddenly seem a lot more sinister… Fun fact: Gordon Ramsey received a number of complaints when he ate puffin heart on his show, The F Word. How heartless.

A-PING

, CAMBODIA Fried tarantula. People in Cambodia fry tarantulas and then actually eat them. They can be barbecued, grilled, fried or served on a stick. Looks like spiders have so much more versatility than just being washed down the plughole! Apparently they became popular during food shortages under the Khmer Rouge regime but seem to have stuck around. Why, Cambodia? Just - why?

YAK PENIS

, CHINA It’s also known as “Dragon in the Flame of Desire” and if that’s not a great name for a penis then I don’t know what is. Many Chinese believe it is also good for your health. Yum!

ROCKY MOUNTAIN OYSTERS,

US Testicles of a bull. In the good old US of A gnawing on some poor creature’s gonads is not just reserved for the Z-List celebrities exiled to the Amazon for entertainment purposes. The Yanks deep-fry them and they are often found at festivals. Maybe they should introduce them at Glasto. A guy wearing a bandana, playing Wonderwall and munching on a bull’s dangly bits – I can see it now.

TOP TIP -

JUST... NO.

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

MATCH THE QUOTE TO THE CELEB...

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman

I’ve never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don’t like eating ﬁsh and I know that’s very popular out there

I’d rather smoke crack than eat cheese from a can

I wouldn’t run for president. I wouldn’t want to move to a smaller house

If everybody in the world dropped out of school we would have a much more intelligent society

Trees cause more pollution than automobiles do

1. George Bush

4. Bono

7. Ronald Reagan

2. Arnold Schwarzenegger

5. Christina Aguilera

8. Elizabeth Hurley

3. Gwyneth Paltrow

6. Britney Spears

9. Jaden Smith

21 MARCH - 20 APRIL Your mood can seem intense early on this month with a desire to get organized and give 100% in the process. However, a lighter and brighter mood shines through as Mars powers into Sagittarius, highlighting options for adventure and travel. Later, the Libra New Moon on September the 23rd is perfect for a fresh start as far as relationships are concerned.

Taurus

21 APRIL - 21 MAY The focus on everyday interaction intensifies. The chances are there can also be positive news as you’ll be keen to resolve an ongoing issue with renewed determination. It’s time to make a few changes and clear the air. Later in the month there’s a shift towards health and wellness buoyed by the New Moon, making this an excellent time to start a new diet or exercise regime.

Gemini

22 MAY - 21 JUNE Romantic opportunities can shine through, along with a heightened awareness of your creative potential. Plus you might also find yourself in the spotlight around the time of the Full Moon on September 8th, with an opportunity to show your best face to the world. Later, as Venus glides into Libra, a fun liaison may also take on a sultrier vibe.

Cancer

22 JUNE - 23 JULY Though busy, you might enjoy some down time, with romance and pleasure options hopefully tempting you away from any chores. An existing relationship could become pleasantly passionate too. A sunnier mood showing up from midmonth is likely to entice you out of your comfort zone. Perhaps you’ll spruce up your home with a new look.

Leo

24 JULY - 23 AUGUST A positive and upbeat mood can encourage you to tackle an issue that’s been plaguing you for far too long. The first two weeks of September can see you show a determination to slice through problems and find much-needed solutions. The New Moon on the 23rd can be helpful if you’re taking a study course or want to collaborate on an important idea or project.

24 AUGUST - 23 SEPTEMBER You’re likely to be in your element for much of the month and ready to forge ahead with personal plans and goals. The Full Moon on September 8th might bring feelings out into the open regarding a relationship glitch, but if so try not to overreact. With Mercury edging into Scorpio late in the month, you can find yourself on a mission to hunt out the ‘truth’ of situations.

Libra

24 SEPTEMBER - 23 OCTOBER You may be motivated to take action regarding your financial affairs, only this time you’ll want to grapple with things once and for all. With Mars rocketing into Sagittarius on the 13th you may feel happier and more at peace with the world. Finally, the New Moon in your sign on September 23rd can help you to kick-start important goals or galvanise any existing strands.

24 OCTOBER - 22 NOVEMBER A sense of empowerment can help you power through obstacles and obtain your desired outcomes. Yet it’s not all work as social opportunities are likely to be plentiful too. Later in the month you could find yourself in a phase in which you’ll benefit from relaxing and recharging your batteries

(WE DON’T KNOW ANYONE CALLED ALICE, BUT IT SOUNDED BETTER THAN ALAN)

I prefer Facebook chat to clubbing and I’ve never been one of the “popular girls”. I’ve heard freshers is full on and I’m worried that it is going to be like a playground popularity contest all over again. I can’t wait for it to be over. Rebecca, Warwick Freshers will be one of the best weeks of your ﬁrst term, not because of beer pong or whatever else you have heard goes on… but for meeting people who have just descended on your campus from all over the world. And do you know what? They won’t know anyone either and will be just as nervous, even if they don’t show it. So don’t hide behind the glow of your computer screen, go to as much as possible, and check out the societies your Students’ Union has on oﬀer.

I’m starting university in just a couple of weeks but my loan hasn’t even come through yet. And did I mention I am going to be homeless? You see, I got accepted into university through clearing so was not able to apply for halls of residence in time and my university are saying there is nothing that can be done. Help? Homeless, London Whatever you do, don’t suﬀer in silence your Student Union are there to support you whatever happens during your time at university. You should also enquire about hardship funding for students experiencing exceptional circumstances. So take a trip to your SU to begin with. Also, easier said than done but don’t panic, there are alternatives to university halls and you can still have a great ﬁrst year. First of all check out private halls, this is student accommodation but it is not university owned. There are a number of these in London such as Urbannest and Unite however the rent is likely to be more expensive as they are not subsidised. You can also look at listings on websites such as www.studentspareroom.co.uk for rooms going in houses with other students.

George, Exeter That was quick thinking there George. I’m not saying your girl is a gossip but if she had noticed you would probably be the talk of the town. So don’t be embarrassed and ask her out on a second date, but do us all a favour and take her somewhere other than the boozer.

Virgo

Scorpio

ASK ALICE

I’m obsessed with this girl on my course. We’ve spent a lot of time together this summer and last week I ﬁnally plucked up the courage to ask her on a date. We were both down the local drinking and laughing too much, when I wet myself. I don’t know if she noticed as I pretended to spill a drink over myself to cover it up, but now I’m too embarrassed to even text her. What do I do?

HORRORSCOPES Aries

AGONY AUNT :

I’ve always thought Marilyn Monroe looked fabulous, but I’d kill myself if I was that fat”.

whenever you have the opportunity. Embrace nature where possible.

Sagittarius

23 NOVEMBER - 21 DECEMBER Pushing ahead with ambitious plans can boost your chances of success, even if you only take small steps to begin with. Little and often may ensure steady progress this month. Plus the ability to let go of hurtful past experiences can infuse you with new, vibrant energy. Finally, the feisty energies of Mars arriving on the 13th are sure to give you added pizzazz to explore new vistas.

Capricorn

22 DECEMBER - 20 JANUARY There’s likely to be a lot going on socially and this may well increase your enjoyment levels, potentially offering a chance to mix and mingle with some influential faces. However, go easy around the Full Moon on September the 8th as confusion could mar important interactions. With Venus gliding into Libra as the month draws to a close, a key relationship can help you.

Aquarius

21 JANUARY - 19 FEBRUARY Relationships in general can be at the heart of developments, as well as being fun and supportive and bringing added pleasures into your life. You can also be motivated to explore new options and expand your horizons by travelling, studying or moving in new circles. With your social life perking up, an opportunity to connect with new people and connect business and sociability is possible.

Pisces

20 FEBRUARY - 20 MARCH The Full Moon in your sign on September the 8th is likely to heighten feelings but also trigger a greater desire to discuss any issues. However, while this might be helpful with someone you trust, avoid being too honest with someone you don’t know well. Later in the month you may want to put energy into a plan that has potential but try to avoid promising more than you can deliver.

So, where’s the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?

They misunderestimated me.

TR EN

Who Said What?

heart of d supportive r life. You ptions and udying or l life perking w people and sible.

ber the 8th is ger a greater while this ust, avoid n’t know to put entry to avoid

TOP 5: TR EN

TRENDING VIDEOS The One With The Friends Reunion JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE Kimmel’s late-night shenanigans regularly make for amazing YouTube hits such as “Epic Twerk Fail,” “Celebrities Read Mean Tweets,” or even “(I Wanna Channing) All Over Your Tatum”? However, this week, he staged a mini-“Friends” reunion that brought smiles to our faces and made our hearts melt. And proving that “Friends” nostalgia unites all of humanity: in just over 24 hours on YouTube, it cleared a whopping 6 million views. See the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i4H2JHp5XOQ

Women hanging their bras in protest!

MENTAL AGILITY

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

Women in the Spanish town of Valladolid mayor’s rape comments prompt bra protest urging him to quit. Hundreds of protesters deck the city hall with underwear after Francisco Javier León de la Riva appeared to blame women for sex assaults.

See the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXZ2en7M890

2-year-old dominates the Ice Bucket Challenge (AND SWEARS!) A YouTube user recently shared a video that featured a two-yearold girl named Scarlett Rose Davis, from Walsall, who gives the most adorable and sincere apology after using the F word during her ALS Ice Bucket Challenge. The little one apologised for using the “naughty word” before running oﬀ to her playhouse in a cute fashion. We’d be cursing, too, if we had water dumped on us and we weren’t entirely sure what to expect! See the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAJ3xrMxoMU

Leonardo DiCaprio’s Ice Bucket Challenge HOW TO RAISE SOME MONEY & ROCK A MAN BUN! Leonardo DiCaprio was late to accept the Ice Bucket Challenge but he made up for it on Monday in a big way. Leonardo, who famously died in freezing water in the 1997 blockbuster Titanic, posted a video as he accepted the challenge. It is rumoured the actor also donated a whopping $100,000 to the ALS Association.

See the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VwCgCrkdZAo

What “Wrecking Ball” sounds like on a recorder SPOILER: IT’S TERRIBLE. As students you know that there can be a lot of downtime and sometimes you just don’t know what to do with yourself when not doing university work. But one guy thought why not learn ‘Wrecking Ball’ on the recorder? The result was… interesting!

See the video: www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYd2dgHzcoU

DRINKING GAME OF THE MONTH: Higher or Lower

Everyone’s favourite dancing show, Strictly Come Dancing, is back on our screens so in honour of Brucie and his toupee, who both retired from the show this year (no more awkward jokes, yay!), The University Paper brings you a drinking game based around one of his greatest ever game shows – Play Your Cards Right. Good game, good game!

WHAT YOU WILL NEED: Three or more players, drink and a pack of cards. HOW TO PLAY: Deal a card to the first player. They must guess whether the next card will be higher or lower. If the guess is incorrect, the player must drink a number of fingers of their drink equal to the value of the card. So, for example, if the first card drawn is a 7 and the player guesses the next card will be higher, but the next card drawn is a 5 then the player must drink five fingers. If they are incorrect and a picture card is drawn then they have to finish their drink. If the guess is right, or if the next card is the same as the current card, they get another go. If they survive up to three cards they may choose to continue or to pass to the next player. You can spice it up by allowing each player who guesses right three times in a row to make up a new rule. e.g. you’re not allowed to cross your limbs, or you must say the opposite of what you mean. Players in violation of rules must, naturally, take a drink. *WE KNOW THAT YOU’RE SO SMART WE DON’T NEED TO REMIND YOU TO DRINK SENSIBLY RIGHT? CONSIDER YOURSELVES WARNED.

for men who know who they’re talkin’ to...

DE NIRO & STALLONE BOB AND SLY BEAR A GRUDGE

NEED TO KNOW

GUIDE TO 2014

SIX NATIONS

CHRIS ROBSHAW

ECO WARRIOR

MATT DAMON

FEBRUARY 2014 £4.20

02 9 771353 347258 7

Emma Glover GETS ALL SWEATY AND STUFF

BETH HUMPHREYS KEVIN HART A PUSSYCAT DOLL MAIL-ORDER BRIDES MAXÏMO PARK 001 cover.indd 1

for men who know who they’re talkin’ to...

DE NIRO & STALLONE BOB AND SLY BEAR A GRUDGE

NEED TO KNOW

GUIDE TO 2014

SIX NATIONS

CHRIS ROBSHAW

ECO WARRIOR

MATT DAMON

FEBRUARY 2014 £4.20

02 7 9 771353 347258

Emma Glover GETS ALL SWEATY AND STUFF

BETH HUMPHREYS KEVIN HART A PUSSYCAT DOLL MAIL-ORDER BRIDES MAX MAXÏ MAXÏMO ÏMO PARK 001 cover.indd 1

23/12/2013 18:54

www.loadedcasino.co.uk

23/12/2013 18:54

KNOW THE INSIDE

DO YOU

T R AC K O N

CAMPUS? IF SO THE UNIVERSITY PAPER WANTS TO HEAR FROM YOU. We are scouring the UK for student journalists, so whether you are looking for work experience or simply spending too much time in the SU, get in touch today. We are on the look out for opinion leaders and change makers who can write engaging copy. Your pieces will be printed in The University Paper which is read by thousands of students across the UK and you will get that all important byline - perfect if you are looking to build a portfolio. Not to mention that age old adage, it will look great on the CV. So if you would like to be an influential voice for the student community or just have a strong front page tell us what is going on - pitch your ideas to The University Paper, email: editor@unipaper.co.uk

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

Should you Work Part Time at Uni?

HABITS YOU

SHOULD TAKE

TO WORK

WITH YOU Getting into good working habits whilst at Uni is a good way to prepare for entering the ‘Real World’. There are lots of little things you can do whilst studying which will help you adapt and succeed at whatever career you pursue. Here are a couple…

From bar work to waitressing; volunteering roles to retail posts - the question of whether you should work part time at University is one only you can answer and needing the money (or not!) isn’t always the deciding factor. Here are our top reasons for taking on a part time role alongside your studies: YOU WANT TO BE SOCIAL Whilst University is no doubt one of the most sociable environments you’ll encounter, having a work team to count amongst your friends is a great feeling. Did someone say “after work drinks”?

YOU HAVE SPARE TIME Certain degrees require only a few hours of lecture and seminar attendance per week. If you’re keeping up with coursework but still have time to spare, why not put it to good use and take on a new job? Hours can be flexible to fit in with study schedules, or it may be the case that you’d prefer to plan your weekends around a set Friday night shift.

YOU WANT TO ENHANCE YOUR CV If you’re smart about it you can tailor your work experience to fit in with your degree. Whilst there may not be a weekend job in biomechanics, if you’re into fashion – why not take a role in a department store? If you’re learning about leisure and tourism, a travel agent’s would be a great place to gain some relevant experience and supplement your degree.

BE TIDY – Tidiness isn’t the reserve of those with too much spare time, it is an indicator of an organised mind. Reduce the clutter on your desk and you will not only have a better environment, but you will find things much easier. You wouldn’t want your future boss to think you were messy!

MAKE LISTS & PRIORITISE – Lists aren’t restricted to shopping, Christmas and things to do before you die. Start making lists – personal and work ones – then get cracking once you have prioritised the important tasks. Once complete, tick it off to feel a satisfying sense of accomplishment. Businesses use tasking software such as Basecamp and even Outlook to keep track of projects – use them now and you will find integrating them into your job much easier.

CV-Library can offer numerous part time job opportunities and further learning courses (many for free) across the UK. Register for free today and get searching to find the perfect role for you.

PROFESSIONAL INSIGHT :

How to Make Life Easier for the ‘Future You’

‘The future,’ may well be the last thing on your mind when you’ve just started university, however, it’s never too early to start thinking about how you can make life easier for the ‘future you’! For graduates, standing out from the crowd is important, and if you’ve spent the last three years adding worthwhile work experience and life skills to your repertoire, you stand a much greater chance of landing that dream job. Here are CV-Library’s top suggestions for improving your CV as you go along:

TAKE A PART TIME JOB Employers love a hard worker, and by that we don’t mean someone who never hits pause or goes out to play. If you show willing to use some of your spare time for working instead of partying, this will greatly improve your employability later on. Taking a part time role at weekends or during the times you’re not in lectures could make all that difference for your post-university job applications.

LEARN FROM YOUR MENTORS Most Universities will assign mentors to help students along with their degrees and coursework. Attend your meetings- listen to their opinions and learn what you can. Most importantly – if you can – bond with them. When you graduate and find yourself looking for a full time role, you’ll be happy to have a

go-to referee to vouch for your personality and attitude. Plus, if you’re keen to get into academia or their field of expertise; their insights and experience could prove invaluable.

MAKE THE MOST OF THE OPPORTUNITIES AVAILABLE TO YOU Hiring managers love seeing evidence of someone who is willing to put their all into making the most of the opportunities available to them. Whether you volunteer as a student brand ambassador, take part in the student elections or even an active role in a uni sports team, everything you can do to show an interest in personal development will mean bonus points for you later on in life. Take it from us - don’t just coast along at university; grab every opportunity you’re given with both hands. You’ll regret it if you don’t.

WWW.CV-LIBRARY.CO.UK

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

OPPORTUNITIES NATIONAL

CARDIFF

Graduate Graduate Recruitment Sales Consultant Executive

Charity Fundraiser

Sales

(permanent)

£20000 - £40000/annum +£40K + Benefits London Job ID: 20a1421118

£25000/annum

Cardiff £6.31/hour

Cardiff Commision based, Market Rates Job ID: 118445041

You would be recruiting into both contract and permanent positions. Initially you will start in a resourcing role which will support a substantial part of your training. This Graduate role will eventually see you placed in a 360 Recruitment Consultant role in a fast-paced and lucrative industry. You will be developing new business, increasing your candidate network, attending meetings with clients, interviewing candidates and be writing and posting professional job adverts.

Civil engineering or environmental science graduates are required for this leading British manufacturer. Based within the manufacturing facility you will report into the Director of Business Development and help manage major projects with local authorities, utilities providers and associated contractors. Dealing with engineers, you will assist with enquiries, produce quotes and close business.

A Cardiff-based charity fundraising team are looking for 4 new members of staff to join their expanding operation. This is an opportunity to work as a call centre charity worker, following up on warm leads to identify avenues of further donations. Experience in charity sales is essential.

This is a fantastic opportunity for independent sales work within the local area. No transport is required, and as the role is commission based, your earnings could be limitless. Hours are flexible to fit around a busy lifestyle.

Graduate Software Developer

Graduate Engineer

Telesales Fundraiser (part-time)

Customer Servies Operative

£20000 - £25000/annum

Southampton Job ID: 201419012

Leeds Job ID: 201403764

Cardiff £6.31/hour

Cardiff £7.00 - £7.50/hour

Job ID: 201407158

Job ID: 201401773

A large multinational company is looking for a number of Graduate Java Developers in the Southampton area. Graduate Developers must be passionate about software development. You will ideally have some skills with Java, but any coding experience with C, C++ or C# will also be considered. The position will be highly varied and will include designing, writing and testing highquality code as you work alongside experienced developers.

This multi-disciplinary practice operates Worldwide and deals with buildings, transport, environment and energy to an award-winning standard. You will have the chance to work on a fantastic range of projects where you will be designing systems for hospitals, data centres, banks, offices and schools. You would have just finished a degree course in building services or are currently in your final year able for day release.

If you’re a student looking for part time work and are interested in assisting charities, this could be for you. Work in a lively team to sell the message about your charity, and acquire donation pledges.

An international parcel network delivery are looking for an experienced individuals for their customer service team. As a Customer Services Operator you will be dealing with customer both face to face and over the telephone, completing data entry tasks, adhering to company policies and procedures, collecting parcels for customers for the warehouse.

(permanent)

Manchester Job ID: 201421283

Electrical Design

(permanent)

(part-time)

Job ID: 201427403

Representative

(part-time)

To find out more and apply for these jobs please visit www.cv-library.co.uk

WWW.CV-LIBRARY.CO.UK

SPECIAL

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

ACCOMMODATION

SURVIVING HALLS

Cardiff will soon be alive with the pitter-patter of tiny fresher’s, but what can our newest residents expect of their communal abodes? By KIRSTY FARDELL AND NIALL IVIN

PHOTO CREDIT: KIRSTY FARDELL AND NIALL IVIN

UNIVERSITY HALL - CARDIFF UNIVERSITY

There is going to be a minimum of 7 students sharing a kitchen, so bring flip flops or decent slippers to walk around in – the sticky dirty floor will arrive before the cleaner does. You’re more likely to get placed in shared bathroom accommodation, which can actually be a plus because they’re always kept clean by the cleaner unlike the en-suites. The bus to and from campus will be annoying but you’ll get used to it, just don’t miss the last one.

STUDENT HOUSES – CARDIFF UNI

They may be in desperate need of a makeover but they do have massive bedrooms, despite being really cheap. When sharing a bathroom do not leave your washing products in there when you’re not – someone will use them and they’ll empty a lot quicker than they should. You will probably not have enough fridge and freezer space, so allocate shelves to people and stick to it so no one uses yours!

CYNCOED CAMPUS HALLS - CARDIFF METROPOLITAN

If you managed to get into the self catered blocks, congratulations. Although you will have problems of your own to deal with, such as burning your food, and people

pinching your milk, you should appreciate being able to eat whenever you please. Those of you that are in the catered blocks, listen in. The catering times will never change. They don’t care how hung-over you are. So get up, and get your breakfast in you, no excuses. You are paying a premium for the food they put on in the cafeteria, so get your monies worth. If you really can’t stand to sit in the canteen, ask the servers to do you a take-away version. Even though that kitchenette in your halls is largely useless, keeping some tinned food, (baked beans and the like) handy is very useful. If it snows, the caterers won’t be in, and you will be going hungry. Catered and self catered alike, you will both have to deal with the campus laundrette. ALWAYS arrive early to get your clothes out, or they will be left soaking wet on the floor until you arrive. Also, no matter how much fabric conditioner you use, your garments will never smell quite right after a cycle in those machines, so get used to it.

SENGHENYDD COURT - CARDIFF UNIVERSITY

People call it the Senghetto – and unlike when they refer to Talybont as “Talybronx,” they’re not being saying it in a fond way. And that alone is all you really need to know. Good luck, soldier.

TOP MAKE AWA

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

e t

es?

MICHAEL O’CONNELL-DAVIDSON

PHOTO CREDIT: OLIVIA HAINS

TOP 5 MISTAKES YOU’LL MAKE NOW YOUR LIVING AWAY FROM HOME 1. FORGETTING TO BUY TOILET PAPER. Your mum will remember to send you away with a pack of 6 when you first leave, but when you try and set up a rota for buying it between you and your new housemates – there is always one who forgets. One day you will be the forgetter, and you’ll feel the wrath of your desperate housemates. 2. RUIN CLOTHES BY WASHING INCORRECTLY. Something will shrink, colours will run, whites will become greys. Style it out as the inevitable makeover all students must have, be the fashionable one wearing ankle swingers and skin-tight jumpers. Eventually you’ll learn to read the label, but only after you’ve made enough mistakes. 3. FEELING RICH. You will convince yourself that you deserve a new wardrobe, or a Macbook is the only thing that will get you through uni. You’ll tell yourself your loan was made for you to have this lifestyle, and still feel rich after your purchases. It will take first year for you to learn how short your loan really goes, but you’ll get there. After buying the Macbook. 4. BRINGING TOO MUCH. Although you don’t need all 30 pairs of shoes, you will bring them. Luckily you’ll be given a shoebox room in halls, although it won’t fit much else. Bringing a kettle and toaster will make you feel ahead of the game until you get there - and there are five other kettles and toasters brought by your equally front-running housemates. Send your parents back with some things to remember you by.

ESSENTIALS FOR LIVING ALONE

THE UNTIDY ONE: They make a terrible mess at dinner, leave their dishes sitting in the sink and their room is just as bad. Beware the mess!

THE FOOD THIEF: They strike when no one is around and act innocent when the missing food is discovered. This will happen and the thief will never be found.

THE PARTY ANIMAL: They spend most their time drinking the night away, come in drunk and rowdy then miss half their lectures because of a hangover.

THE INVISIBLE ONE: This shy person hides in their room twenty-four seven you’ll never hear them, but may occasionally see them make an appearance for some food. THE GYM ADDICT: This gym mad person will spend every spare moment working out and happen to mention the gym in every conversation they have with anyone.

THE ONE WHO CAN’T COOK. They live off takeaways, ready meals and cereal! If they do attempt to cook it’s a disaster.

Michael O’ConnellDavidson lived alone and he was okay (sort of).

MICHAEL O’CONNELL-DAVIDSON

1 2 3

Blu tac – you’ll want to proudly display a load of old photos so you always look popular, or an unusual poster to look interesting. Bedside lamp. Toilet roll – keep one to yourself for the inevitable emergencies. You know what we’re talking about.

MEGAN DESMOND

Moving to university can seem scary at first. You don’t know anyone and have no idea what your housemates are going to be like. Here are the six types of housemate you will inevitably live with while at university.

5. NEVER CLEANING You will keep putting off the hoovering, or cleaning the bathroom, telling yourself it will still be dirty tomorrow - you can do it then! Before you know it it’s the end of the year and you have to clean the whole house to avoid fines. It becomes more of an excavating project than a quick clean, and you’ll dig up things you completely forgot you owned.

UNIVERSITY TOP 5’S:

HOUSEMATES YOU WILL INEVITABLY LIVE WITH AT UNI

Pack of cards – essential for pre drinking or spontaneous drinking nights in.

Freezer bags/tubs – cooking for one takes a lot of practice, so freezing your leftovers will give you tomorrow’s lunch hassle free.

Guide to the student ward ZAK MAOUI

PHOTO CREDIT: ELIZABETH PENNY

Cathays is the central hub for the students of Cardiff. Having left the somewhat controlled environments of halls, whether they be the Talybont student village or one of the central private halls, it is unlikely that students will find themselves anywhere other than Cathays. There are fifty students to every resident, which ensures a lively atmosphere at all times. Honestly, at all times…whether it is 12pm or 12am (except during the holidays, when one might expect a tumbleweed to roll down Cathays Terrace). The epicentre of the area is undoubtedly the famous (for us students anyway) Woodville Pub, where there is a 99.9% chance of seeing someone you know, especially on Mondays when it’s ‘Quids’ and drinks are a one pound. Cathays is well suited to a student budget. Crwys Road, Salisbury Road and Woodville Road supply students with all they need from budget shops to convenience stores, bars and pubs to an impressive array of kebab houses. Sitting majestically at the head of Woodville Road, which acts as the Pall Mall of Cathays, is the infamous Woodville Fish Bar. As a regular (only after 2am, of course), I can now say that I get the odd wave from the employees when walking to my lectures. Cathays has it all. There is little worry of waking up the neighbours - because it’s likely they are also getting in from a night at out. Cathays is the centre or student life in Cardiff, so you should have a good cover story ready for when you bump into a coursemate at 9am when you are doing the walk of shame (or stride of pride) after a night at the union. Hangover food is never an issue. Tesco, Sainsbury’s and Coop are more than accepting of you making a call in your pyjamas. Woodville fish bar even does a free delivery service, although maybe leave that one for a 4am crawl home. Cardiff is a student city. A friend of mine attended USW and lived in Cathays’ neighbouring Roath. She stated that ‘Cathays and Roath felt like separate communities’ away from the city centre. She now pines for this student atmosphere having since moved to ‘rough around the edges’ Adamsdown. Personally, I could not be happier living here. There is a continuous buzz, even at 9am on a Thursday when last night’s revellers try to make it to lectures after their student night of choice.

WIN PS4

AND

SO IF YOU FANCY BAGGING YOURSELF OVER £300 OF GAMING GEAR SIMPLY EMAIL YOUR NAME, UNIVERSITY AND YEAR OF STUDY TO WIN@UNIPAPER.CO.UK ENTRIES CLOSE OCTOBER 13TH GOOD LUCK!

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

SPORT

WHO does it better Cardiff Met or Cardiff Uni?

ALEX MIARLI

Cardiff University. Cardiff Metropolitan. Two sides of the same coin of a currency that will remain in circulation till the end of time. In a perfect world, these two universities would put aside their differences and rivalries, link arms and sing Kumbaya around a giant campfire while sipping hot chocolate with marshmallows. I mean, both universities have so much in common; they both have students, both have sports teams AND both are located in the same city! But this is simply an imperfect world and in reality, we will remain at each other’s throat, constantly drawing comparisons of which sports teams are better and which university has the better alumni’s (and let’s be honest, who thought that kumbaya would be a good idea?!). This rivalry always seems to enter new realms out on the playing field and the question that always plagues everyone’s mind on both sides is… Which side is better? The Oxford Dictionary defines the word better as -- Scratch that. Forget all things professional. There’s only sport. There’s only rivalry. Everyone knows that when you get out on that field against Cardiff Met (or Cardiff Uni) that there’s no politics. There’s no playful games. It’s just a good old-fashioned showdown! And what’s more exhilarating than beating your closest rival!? That’s

not a rhetorical question, because nothing is better – especially if you see that team later on out in Glam. Both universities have big sporting scenes, and both have seen world class players graduate from each university but it’s time to leave the past where it belongs. Being the imperfect world that this is, we may never know which side is better, but I’m prepared to settle it the only way that is really possible. So, shall we go a few rounds out on the pitch? We’ll ring the bell. Ding. Ding.

TEAMS TO WATCH OUT FOR ALEX MIARLI & MUSTAFA HERSI

PHOTO CREDIT: PAIGE WILLIAMS

Cardiff Uni: Lacrosse Club

From one of the more obscure and lesser known sports comes a club that ﬁelds many teams at a high level: the Lacrosse Club. Cardiﬀ ’s Lacrosse Club is one of the university’s most active (both socially and competitively), and it’s very easy to get involved in. It’s also growing fast. The club is quickly making a name for itself as one of the largest sports clubs as well one of the best. With an active committee, numerous training sessions, wild socials, a broad entry level and both men and women’s 1st and 2nd teams entered into BUCS, there’s no real surprise it won last year’s Club of the Year Award… Can they do it back-to-back?

Cardiff Metropolitan: Womens Rugby

Being one of the only universities in the country to boast two women’s Rugby teams in the same league promotion, this group of women don’t mind getting physical and taking out the opposition. With one team competing in the BUCS Premier South and the other in the Western 1A competition, Cardiﬀ Met can be proud of the plethora of female rugby stars representing the burgundy and blue colours. To join, simply go to one of their stalls at the Freshers’ Fayre to sign up and get ready to get muddy, slightly bruised and surprised at how satisfying it all feels.

LIKE OUR FACEBOOK PAGE FOR A

CHANCE TO

WIN

£2000 WORTH OF APPLE PRODUCTS 13” Macbook Pro | iPad Retina | iPhone 5S | iPod Touch

facebook.com/TheUniPaper

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

SPORT

TOP SPORTS SOCIETIES

RUMINA AWAL & MUSTAFA HERSI

CARDIFF UNI BOXING IS ONE OF THE TOP SOCIETIES TO JOIN THIS YEAR For a fitness fanatic, wandering around the sports fayre was a magical experience you just can’t describe. Having so many sports clubs in one room, throwing themselves at you to be a part of their clique was for sure ego boosting. But, I wanted to be a part of a club that realistically suited me in terms of fitness. I was that fresher, who signed up to multiple clubs and couldn’t find enough time or energy to commit to them all, but I immediately felt boxing was the one most worth my time, money and energy. The hourly sessions were physically demanding and emotionally draining. You’re pushing yourself constantly to keep up with the class’ momentum and to prove that you can push past those mental barriers. And if you couldn’t, the coach was always on hand to humiliate you (all in good humour of course). The coaches are experienced and committed, dedicating their personal time to training you for matches. They’re talented boxers who live and breathe the sport, and this passion is conveyed through the weekly classes. I enjoyed the overall atmosphere – we had to keep focused, but the mood remained friendly. During the taster session, I was the only female in the class. I was totally outnumbered and the level of testosterone was overwhelming. I couldn’t blend in the background even if I wanted to. As the sessions progressed, I

began to see more girls joining the same timeslot. Living in the twenty first century, there was no stigma against us, and the girls naturally bonded. Having a female partner during training and just support from other girls is encouraging, and I did feel more confident training. Training involved focusing on the traditional skills of boxing, mastering the stance and the technicalities of the sport. Occasionally we had the ring out for those who wanted to spar. This was exciting as it enhanced the experience of a real match. The facilities were good, as we practiced in one of the private rooms of Talybont sports hall. We had to purchase our own boxing wraps and pay a pound sub per session. I wouldn’t go on to say joining a sports club is cheap especially as a first year where you are managing your finances for the first time, but I found boxing affordable. If you’re committed to the club it becomes an investment into your fitness and wellbeing, and that’s never a waste of money. All those gruelling hours of training does get put to good use. The coaches organised friendly matches against amateur boxers from different universities. This was optional depending on how confident you were but attending these events to show support was fun as it differed from the standard socials. The more traditional socials were relaxed and nights out did not happen often. Socials varied from casino

CARDIFF METROPOLITAN FOOTBALL TEAM

After earning back to back promotions, the team commonly known as the Seagulls will be looking forward to a return to the Welsh Football League’s coveted Division 1. With an impressive goal difference of 62 in the previous season, this group of players are surely a team to look out for boasting a frightening attack and a stubborn defence. The team look to be going from strength to strength as they celebrate their 20th year of existence and there’s no reason not to be part of this established set up and their facilities have improved over time. There simply is no better place to play football in the Welsh capital as a student: a well maintained surface makes the pitch a joy for teams to play the beautiful game in the way it meant to be played. A state of the art astroturf surface, primarily used for hockey training, is a welcome alternative and is often used for football training. Having recently invested £250,000 on their sports facilities, Cardiff Metropolitan’s sports teams have never enjoyed themselves them more and you could be enjoying it too! The Met men’s first team have an exciting BUCS season ahead where they will be playing Bournemouth, Bristol, Gloucester, Swansea, Nottingham and Hartpury. The second team will be facing off against other teams from Swansea and Hartpury, as well as UWE and Cardiff University. The teams form a strong part

of Cardiff Metropolitan’s overall BUCS performance; for those just entering university, the BUCS league tables are a way of charting the performance of teams and universities over the academic year. Cardiff Metropolitan currently sits at 12th on the UK-wide league tables, placing it far ahead of other Cardiff-based universities. Cardiff University, Cardiff Medical School and the University of South Wales, which occupy ranks 22 and 48 respectively. If you would like to join the team, you can do so at the freshers’ fayre which starts the week beginning the 22nd September. Subject to trials, you may be the final piece of the puzzle as the team heads into a tough season in Division 1. Attending trials is also a great chance to meet some new people and get to know them; there will be lots of hopefuls there just like you, and sport is one of the greatest icebreakers around. The vast majority of the football team have a huge interest in professional football and this can and will lead to endless discussions. Additionally, it also creates an opportunity to go and watch a football match. Cardiff City Stadium is just around the corner, and is constantly hosting home matches of Cardiff City and the Welsh national team. So whether you want to casually attend trials and have a kick about, or go full Cristiano Ronaldo and try and take on the whole team, you’re certainly encouraged to enjoy yourself

3 TEAM MATES YOU WILL ALL KNOW

MICHAEL O’CONNELL-DAVIDSON

PHOTO CREDIT: HANNAH RILEY

Joining a sports team or sports club at university today seems to almost be like an obligation but sometimes not for the weekly exercise. Whatever your reasoning, there is one undeniable fact when it comes to sports clubs that reel countless people in year after year: socials. As you practice your technique out on the training field, throw a couple of touchdowns or down a pint or two (or three or…) at a social, you will undoubtedly make a few observations about your team along the way and you’ll be able to work out what stereotypes of university students are among your ranks. Look out for the following:

THE PARTY ANIMAL More commonly known as “The LAD”, the party animal will tend to be nocturnal and will seem to have a permanent hangover. The party-goer will be the heavy drinker of the bunch and seemingly knows everybody within a 30mile radius. Often seen as the king of the pack, you will find the LAD telling the next fresher to “down it” or starting the next “Kolo/Yaya” chant. The LAD’s sole purpose of joining is the social aspect, with the sport being an extra.

THE BECKHAM Derived from the now-retired footballer David Beckham, “The Beckham” almost comes off as the chosen one. “The Beckham”, while sometimes being a man of few words, has everything; they’re nice and friendly to all, has the looks, the laidback attitude and even the skills to back it all up on the playing field.

THE ONE WHO TAKES IT (TOO) SERIOUSLY The Overachiever. They seem to be here to actually play the sport and that’s it... They just might not be very good. The Overachiever will have all the latest and the most expensive kit and will be constantly making excuses as to why they’re playing badly, blaming it on an injury or another player who gave the ball away 13minutes ago. -While there are many more stereotypes out there in the wilderness of sports, there is no doubt that you will find one of the above along the way. And if you can’t find one within your team… well maybe that’s because it’s you…