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| THE VOICE APRIL 2023
News Feature
‘Church must recognise Debbie says she felt abandoned while suffering a controlling husband. By Leah Mahon
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HE BLACK church has long been a cornerstone of many livelihoods for first and second generation migrants of the Windrush era of the 1940s and 50s, and later as more African communities began to settle in the 1980s. Black majority churches (BMCs) became ‘safe spaces’ for families of African and Caribbean heritage, as they built a new life away from home while dealing with the often violent racism on Britain’s streets. Yet, within this place of togetherness and worship, often lurks a problem that the church often helps to suppress – domestic abuse. The issue has led some to label the Black churches as a growing “public health concern,” but victims – members of the congregation – often struggle to speak out in an atmosphere that prioritises Christian unity over justice. Landmark research by religious community forum Spirit and Solace found that 38 per cent of church members had experienced abuse – and most had not sought support afterwards. Eighty-four per cent of the survey’s participants were female, of Caribbean heritage and between the ages of 46-55 years. Many have been attending weekly church services for over 40 years. Dr Ava Kanyeredzi, a Senior Lecturer in Psychology at the University of East London, who led the research, said she hoped to gather more evidence. But what she had already seen indicates that far too many Black women worshipped in churches that were not responsive to their experiences, and even operated as ‘gatekeepers’ to block women from the help they needed. She said this proved how hidden, and prevalent, domestic abuse in faith spaces actually is for the Black diaspora. “It’s complex because of the nature of domestic abuse. And it’s also complex because of the relationship people have with their faith and going to church,” she tells The Voice. “One of the things that people disclosed was that church spaces are almost like hospitals. People come when they’re broken or they’re sick, when something (bad) has happened. It’s a space that they come to; al-
SO LONELY: Debbie Worrell felt she didn’t get the right support from her church when she revealed she was suffering domestic abuse most like a spa, where the spirit makes them feel whole again.” The research said the BMCs were divided into two categories. Churches that embraced an Old Testament-style approach, reminiscent to churches of the early Windrush generation, often had troubled responses
He used the scriptures to tell me this is how you’re meant to be submissive in how to deal with domestic abuse. Even when disciplinary procedures existed, speaking out risked demoting the victim to “the back row” of the church. These churches, in particular, were more likely to have leaders who were described as controlling, dictatorial and demanding “blind loyalty” from their congregation.
Abused women faced the sharp end of this leadership approach and were expected to “put up and shut up,” particularly if their abuser was a pastor or another church leader. Debbie Worrell, 51, is a survivor of domestic abuse and said she dealt with the “whole shebang” when she was with her ex-husband, also a member of the church community. “He would use the scriptures to tell me this is how you’re meant to be submissive, which is really control. So, he used the scriptures to make me try and stay in line, and made me think it was my God-given duty as his wife to do this,” she said. “If I said that I was going to be going out with my friends, he wouldn’t necessarily stop me, but after the fact, he would basically say when a husband says to his wife that he’s not happy with something, you ought to fall in line because he’s the head of the house. “Therefore, what you’re doing is not being in alignment with what God told you to do.” A total of 34 participants gave evidence in the research, which found there was a ten-
dency to protect the abuser in ‘Old Testament’ Black churches where leaders stressed reconciliation between the abused and the abuser.
SUPPORT
Ms Worrell, who was running her own childcare business at the time, said she experienced this first-hand when she turned to her pastor for help as her marriage broke down, and they were told they had a “good foundation” to improve. However, the mum-of-five thought otherwise and wanted to “outsource” support away from the church, but at that
point she said her relationship with her ex-husband was “irretrievable”. Eventually, he stopped coming to church. The pastor – who worked closely with her exhusband – would ask her how things were progressing, but says that “nobody else was doing any kind of talking or supporting or anything”. Ms Worrell recalls how the pastor’s wife was aware of the domestic abuse she was suffering, but felt she couldn’t turn to her and others from the church’s women’s ministry for help. She described it as a lonely time and said she just needed
someone to “pray with me, hold my hand, give me a hug every so often” as she dealt with the abuse. Dr Kanyeredzi argues that BMCs struggle to deal with cases of domestic abuse because of the belief systems that Christians form about marriage and spirituality. “Christian churches promote marriage, good marriages, and domestic abuse seems antithetical to marriage,” she explains. “In terms of faith with God, all things are possible. But therefore, perhaps misguidedly, church leaders might think we can solve this.
