Torah Wellspring

By Rabbi Ezra Friedman

The Gift of Connection

Living life to the full, and being rewarded for it too

In these exalted days, we prepare to celebrate the historic milestone of kabbalas haTorah. On that day, we—and essentially all of mankind—received the greatest, most precious gift in the world. Even the bombastic miracle of Pesach, says Sefer Hachinuch, when we went from slavery to freedom, does not compare to our excitement on this day due to the sheer value of this incredible present.

For this reason, explains the Chinuch, Shavuos is the only Yom Tov we count toward. In his words, we count down “to show how excited our nefesh is for the day on which we received the Torah.” After all, this was the entire purpose of our exodus from Mitzrayim, the entire purpose of Creation. Just as we count the days in joyous anticipation of a happy occasion, we do likewise in our great excitement of receiving the Torah.

Of course, the Torah was already given to

us at ma’amad Har Sinai. But, as we discussed in this space last month, we get to re-experience the ko’ach of the Yom Tov every single year. On Shavuos of this year, 5781, we have the ability experience the excitement and desire for the Torah that our ancestors felt centuries ago, standing at the foot of the mountain. It’s at this time of year that the little ones sing with great fervor, “Tov li Toras picha me’alfei zahav vachesef.” Passages highlighting the beauty and sweetness of Torah abound: “Ki lekach tov nasati lachem… a good teaching I’ve given to you…” (Mishlei 4:2) “Mah ahavti Torasecha, kol hayom hi sichasi…” “Lulei Torascha sha’ashu’ei az avadeti be’anyi…”

Ample passages remind us how incredible is the gift we were granted at Har Sinai, how the Torah is the light of our lives, our most precious asset. Still, there may be times when we have that niggling thought in our mind, “Wouldn’t life be so much simpler without all of these commandments, all these boundaries that restrict us?” We may have a moment when we start to wonder, “What am I really counting down to? Am I seriously excited for matan Torah? Would it be so bad if we simply knew we’re Hashem’s chosen nation—that He lovingly took us out of Mitzrayim, and that He’s our Father who cares about us—and that was enough? Why all the commandments and constraints?”

Where do all these questions emanate from? Is it possible that the Tov U’Meitiv, the G-d who only wants to do good for us, would place a noose over our heads and force us to live such constricted lives? When we look at the Torah as a set of rituals— as a book of constraints whose purpose is to suffocate our freedom— then, yes, of course we feel restricted. Of course we ask questions like “What’s the point?” because such an existence goes against every fiber of our being. Hakadosh Baruch Hu was the One who created us with a natural desire to feel that we’re acting from our own will. We want to feel that we’re the ones choosing. This is perfectly in line with our hashkafah. Indeed, the Ribbono Shel Olam wants us to choose, hence the phenomenon of bechirah. Therefore, if we feel the Torah is restricting us from making our choices, we’re seeing it from an incorrect perspective.

You’re Tying Those Shoes Anyway

So what is the essential reason for all of the mitzvos? This is a question a young child asked Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach in the following anecdote.

Rav Shlomo Zalman was once walking on the street in Yerushalayim when he stopped at a traffic light. In his characteristic humility, Rav Shlomo Zalman bent down to the child standing next to him and asked, “How are you? What are you learning these days? Do you have any questions?”

“Yes,” replied the child. “I have a question for you. Yesterday we learned the Gemara in Makkos: Ratzah Hakadosh Baruch Hu lezakos es Yisrael—Hashem wanted to confer merit on Yisrael, so He increased Torah and mitzvos, [as it says: “Hashem chafetz lema’an tzidko…”].”

The boy asked, “How is Hashem being mezakeh us? What if I don’t want to do a mitzvah? I lose out. Wouldn’t it be better if we didn’t have all these commandments? Then we wouldn’t be transgressing if we don’t do them!”

The Rav looked the child in the eye and answered warmly, “Tzaddik’l, there’s a halachah in the Shulchan Aruch that when a Yid puts on his shoes in the morning, he should tie his left shoelace before the right.” He turned to the boy and asked, “Do you ever not put on your shoes?”

“Of course not,” said the boy.

“Do you ever leave your house with the laces untied?”

“Of course not.”

“See what Hashem does for you,” the Rav pointed out. “Hashem could have said, ‘Do what you want, just mind your own business. I’m not looking at you at all.’ But what did He do instead? He said, ‘You’re anyway putting your shoes on and tying the laces. Since I want to be you mezakeh, I’ll turn this deed into a mitzvah. I want to elevate this for you so that every time you do something so simple, which you’re anyway doing, you’ll be able to reap untold reward, as well as connect with Me, to let My love enter your heart.”

By “getting involved” in our everyday lives, Hakadosh Baruch Hu is giving us more and more opportunities to receive schar and to connect to Him. He’s telling us, “Look, My dear child. You’re going to live in this world for eighty or ninety or a hundred years. You will need to eat, so let me tell you what to choose, what’s best for you, and at the same time you’ll be reaping rewards and connect to Me. You’ll need to live with others, so let Me tell you how to conduct yourself so you can live in peace. You’ll get married, so let Me tell you how to do so in the most ideal way, so you can enjoy a fulfilling, deep relationship. You’ll need to make a livelihood…”

Who, if not the Creator of the Universe, understands the depths of our nature and what is best for us? And so, He granted us the Yamim Tovim, times to rejoice. As Sefer Hachinuch explains, this is the reason for our chagim. Because we have a natural need to be happy, He implemented

joyous occasions into our lifestyle. The mitzvos are not here to diminish our quality of life. On the contrary, Hashem gave us the ability to choose and He wants us to choose, from our own free will, what is truly best for us. In order for us to know what is good for us, He granted us the Torah. In essence, the Torah is our guidebook, from the lashon of “horeh,” instructions, enabling us to figure out our lives and operate them in the best way possible. Wouldn’t a pilot or driver rejoice if he was given a book that detailed every single function of his vehicle and how to operate it to the maximum?

Not Only For the Next World

Olam Haba aside, the Torah enables us to lead a life in this world that is rich, fulfilling, and beautiful. When we realize this and we lead our lives accordingly, it’s hard for us to understand how we could live without it. Just looking at a tzaddik, talmid chacham, or any Yid who lives by the dictates of Torah, we see the joy radiating from their countenance. Besides for the schar they accrue for the Next World, they truly and thoroughly enjoy every moment of this life. They are able to relate well to others and feel at peace with themselves. And, of course, they bask in the greatest blessing—of having a deep connection to Hashem.

The yesod of the entire Torah is to believe that there’s a G-d who created the world and that we’re His Chosen Nation. In fact, the first dibur that the Ribbono shel Olam proclaimed at Har Sinai was “Anochi Hashem Elokecha,” the mitzvah of emunah. What could be greater than that? To know that we’re not alone, that we have a Father who created us and looks after us, that everything that happens to every Yid is with a cheshbon, with hashgachah pratis—is there a more comforting reality than that? The sefarim tell us that in every mitzvah we do with the proper kavanah, we merit feeling this sense of connection. With every mitzvah we do, we allow Hashem’s love for us to enter our hearts. When we experience this, we feel better, we feel more at peace. When we eat, when we work, when we do what we anyway do as human beings—with the right mindset—we’re being constantly showered with opportunities to connect to Hashem and feel His presence.

“Bechol derachecha da’eihu,” the Torah commands us. When we conduct ourselves righteously in business, when we don’t slander others, when we lead good, clean lives, we’re “knowing” Hashem. We become more and more connected to Him through our everyday actions, all the while doing what is anyway for our best, and living proper, meaningful lives.

This Shavuos—and all year round—may we be zocheh to rejoice with the Torah, to appreciate its sweetness and greatness, and to reap the benefits of leading Torah-true lives.

Is it possible that Hashem would place a noose over our heads and force us to live such constricted lives?

Rabbi Ezra Friedman welcomes questions and comments on this column. Please write to rabbiefriedman@wellspringmagazine.com.