this-is-twenteenzine

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Danielle Jawando turned a potentially suicide inducing situation into a blog that speaks the gritty reality of love, or “ lack of. She’s lent us her thoughts and attempts to answer the burning question...

But why are we still single? I don’t understand why we’re STILL single?” Adem says a string of Mozzarella cheese hanging from his nose. It’s Friday night and we’re indoors with a bottle of Sangriana (which in case you don’t know is the poor man’s sangria), an Iceland Pizza and a Jonathan creek box set. We’d spent most of the afternoon planning Adem's civil partnership, pretending we were in High School Musical (which meant only communicating through verse and choreographed dance moves) and debating whether or not we’d have sex with Alain Davies if we ended up stuck in a lift with him. Which probably explains how we ended up playing “would you rather”? “Binladen, Boris Johnson OR Adolf Hitler?” I say attempting to both change the subject and get him back for the fact I just had to admit I’d rather share a lesbian kiss with Pat Butcher than wipe Danny Devito’s Ass.

NIYI CROWN (STYLIST AND ALL ROUND WONDERFUL) RECOMMENDS..... “I don’t understand why no one wants to go out with us” he continues cramming a slice of pizza in his mouth. I raise my eyebrows. “It’s probably got something to do with the fact we’re sat at home on a Friday night drinking alcohol from Aldi and playing lame games.” Well okay maybe that wasn’t the MAIN reason but I’m sure it doesn’t help. I used to think that generally people were single because they hadn’t met Mr Right yet. That the Universe was just holding out so that it could manifest him when we least expected it. That it was all just this great thing we had to be patient for so that when it came we’d really appreciate it. But the thing is I now realize that actually the real reason why anyone is single is because no one wants to go out with you. – It’s as simple as that. I mean if you were such a catch, someone would have caught you by now. Not that I can blame anyone because if I had a choice I wouldn’t pick the “she would be hot if she wasn’t disabled chic” or the ‘naked superman gay boy’. ”We won’t be single forever “ I say which we both know is a blatant lie.

NIYI CROWN IS TWENTEEN’S HAND PICKED STYLIST. WHEN HE DREAMS, HE DREAMS BIG, AND THAT’S WHY TWENTEEN ARE GLAD TO HAVE HIM ON OUR SIDE www.niyicrown.com twitter.com/MrCrownUK www.modelmayhem.com/superstyle

I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE THINKING.. WAY TOO HIGH A RISK OF BROKEN ANKLES BUT TO THAT I HAVE FOUR WORDS FOR YOU -WHAT WOULD CARRIE DO?Strutt Couture Gold Heels Available at Struttcouture.com for £260

Muldark and Magpie Cocktail Ring The perfect statement for any winter party outfit, this ring may look expensive but in reality it isn’t. Nobody needs to know though. Available at Mudlarkandmagpie.com for £25


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