Western Tidewater Living Winter 2014

Western Tidewater

Living

The Christmas Tree Lady

It’s the holiday season, and for Kathy Whitfield, it’s her favorite time of the year.

The Call of the Slope Catching up with Brandon Parrish

It takes a Village

Dail Gray and staff are looking to build a fine Southern dining establishment in The Back Porch and Grille

WINTER 2014 • vol. 5, no. 4

The qualities

that have made The Village a special place have

recently multiplied. New dining venues are already serving our residents and friends of The Village. Apartments are being updated and renovated.

Newness is all around – new cottages, a new fitness area, a new rehab gym. Life here is more comfortable than ever, and it’s more secure with the addition of Memory Support. Call and schedule a visit. Goodness knows you’ll want to come by and see everything for yourself.

Find us on Facebook.

The Village at Woods Edge

Small town charm. Engaging senior living.

1401 North High Street Franklin, VA 23851 757-562-3100 VillageatWoodsEdge.com

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Western Tidewater

Living

How is it Christmastime already?

Many people I have spoken to recently have asked the same question, and it does seem like 2014 went by in the blink of an eye. As time slips by at an ever-increasing rate of speed, Christmas seems to sneak up on me more and more each year. Which is why I always look forward to our winter issue of Western Tidewater Living; there’s always a story that — as the old song goes — makes things start to look a lot like Christmas.

And one place it definitely looks a lot like Christmas is in the home of Kathy Whitfield. Kathy is somewhat, shall we say, passionate, about decorating for Christmas. Just

letter from the publisher how passionate is Kathy about preparing for the holidays?

Well, the fact that she is known around the community as “The Christmas Tree Lady” ought to tell you something.

Last year, she had 25 of them in her home. This year she hopes to surpass that total.

Whether your efforts to prepare for Christmas are undertaken as enthusiastically as Kathy’s, or if you and your family take a somewhat more subdued approach, we hope that you enjoy reading her story, as well as all of those found in this issue of Western Tidewater Living.

From our family to yours, have a Merry Christmas and a happy holiday season!

Tony Clark Publisher Tidewater Publications

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contents winter 2014

Cover photograph

by Cain Madden ON THE COVER:

Kathy Whitfield had 25 Christmas Trees in her home last year. This year she hopes to ramp that up even more.

Western Tidewater

Living

Tony Clark Publisher Cain Madden Managing Editor Stephen Cowles Staff Writer Andrew Lind Staff Writer Leah Lewis Columnist Ryan Outlaw Designer Loretta Lomax Editorial Assistant Mitzi Lusk Advertising Director Ginnie Spivey Advertising Representative

INSIDE THIS EDITION

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Western Tidewater Living is published four times a year by Tidewater Publications, LLC P.O. Box 497, Franklin, VA 23851 757-562-3187 Advertising rates and information available upon request to ads@tidewaternews.com. Subscriptions are $20 annually in-state, $24 annually out of state and $30 annually overseas.

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PARTY PIX

Western Tidewater residents were out enjoying the cooler air and fall colors at the Franklin Fall Festival and the Boykins Pumpkin Fest.

In each edition, our magazine staff provides a challenge of sorts for readers, testing how much of Western Tidewater they really know. We photograph a scene in Western Tidewater that is visible to motorists or pedestrians.

Whoever can identify the location pictured above will be entered for a chance to win a $25 gift certificate to any one of our partner advertisers.

For the fall edition, the photo was taken of the high water marker by the Blackwater River at Barrett’s Landing in Franklin. Photo by Cain Madden.

So, if you know where this issue’s photo was taken, let us know. If you’re right, you could be a winner. E-mail your answers

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Tell us where our photographer took this photo and get a chance to win a gift certificate.

to magazine@tidewaternews.com Go out and enjoy Western Tidewater!

THE CHRISTMAS TREE LADY

It all started with wanting to give her three children the Christmas joy she experienced as a child. When she retired, Kathy Whitfield of Capron wanted to do much more.

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THE CALL OF THE SLOPE

Catching up with Brandon Parrish

IT TAKES A VILLAGE...

Dail Gray came back to The Village at Woods Edge with a vision for creating something special; The Back Porch and Grille, an upscale southern eatery in Franklin

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column by Leah Lewis photo submitted

Kate Archer Marketing Consultant Michelle Gray Office Manager

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where am I?

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ilos remind me of my childhood.

Sometimes they look architectural. Sometimes they feel intrusive.

In the spring they stand empty and dark against a vibrant landscape. In the middle of summer they melt into the haze, as if waiting for the crop that is waiting for the rain. Then fall comes, and they are full and bursting with harvest. But seeing silos in the winter – that is my favorite. It is as if the big mounds, rising tall and solid, slumber in peace. Sometimes, when they are blanketed in snow or frost or ice, I see them rest, calm and sure of the seasons to come.

For some, these silos represent a normality that is imbedded in a lifestyle, often forgotten. They represent a heritage and hard labor and a simple life.

I remember the first time I climbed to the top of the sixty-foot structure as a little girl – it was winter, and it was an experience that took years to complete with a courage that was slow in coming.

Every time I ventured to climb the tower, it got a little smaller and less intimidating. Eventually I made it to the top and looked out. I looked far and wide. The view before me was well worth the wait.

After that, I climbed the silos freely and without fear, always anticipating the gift I would receive upon reaching

the top. Someone once told me that the experience was a necessary component of my childhood, growing up on a farm.

My father has recollections, of when he was young, and the structures were flat on top with a large amount of space. He would climb the ladder at night and sleep at the peak under the stars. I cherish this memory of his, just as I cherish the building that made the memory possible. It is the same building that participated in many fond memories of my own.

For my friends and I, climbing that ladder became a frequent occurrence. For those of us who had already conquered the challenge, I remember knowing that a little fear was nothing compared to the feeling of complete satisfaction and triumph that would inevitably follow.

And I will always remember the first time I made it to the top and was rewarded by the view. The intensity of the event is exaggerated every time I see the beautiful silhouette of similar structures against the cold, winter horizon. And I am thankful.

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Columnist Leah Lewis describes the memories that seeing a silo brings her from her childhood.

party pix

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Franklin Fall Festival Right, Sandy and Don Spengeman of Franklin check out the crafts at the Franklin Fall Festival.

They are at the R&G Kountry Tables and Wood Crafts of Como, North Carolina.

Left, Keith Travis, Marre Harrison, Jacob Hall, who goes to J.P. King Middle School, and Kyndal Hall, a Franklin High School student. They are all from Franklin.

In the stroller are Addison and Alexia Fowler, and pushing them are Ben Davis and Linda “Me Me� Carter.

PHOTOS BY FRANK DAVIS

western tidewater living

Franklin Fall Festival Below: Southampton High School Key Club members, in front, Jena Araojo; back, from left, Erin Rountree, Brittany Bunn, Rebecca Giorgi, Grace Davis, Meredith Harmon, Arthur Johnson and Sarah Giorgi.

Right: F rom left, Susan and Lynn Powell, along with Evan Ponder, and Dr. Mike and Ruthie Ponder.

PHOTOS BY FRANK DAVIS

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party pix

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Franklin Fall Festival Top left; from left, Constance Copeland, Ricky Copeland, Ralpheal Lee and Shanea Copeland. Seated is John Keltner. Top right, from left, Rheila Johnson, Jan Aleshire, owner of Curves in Franklin, and Jeneen Dimick. Bottom; seated, from left, Scott Sueddon, Shane Stephenson, Tom Strachan, Kelley Stephenson and Ashley Murphy; standing, Lori McNair, Jamie McFarland, Cary Munford, Amy Davis, David Rabil, Jennifer Barrett, Mike Davis, Danny Ellsworth and Earl Nichols.

PHOTOS BY FRANK DAVIS

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PHOTOS BY ANDREW LIND

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party pix

Historical Society 50th Reunion Top; Judy and Collin Pulley stand with retired Judge and author, Dan Balfour, center, who introduced the speaker. Bottom left; Helen Howell, center, wife of former Ag. Museum Director William Howell, stands with Jimmy and Marti Howell. Bottom right; James and Lavinia McGee. PHOTOS BY MERLE MONAHAN

western tidewater living

速

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party pix

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Highground Services celebrates graduating from Franklin Incubator Top left; Tom Jones, left, Dave Tillery and Betsy Jones. Top right; Franklin City Manager Randy Martin, left, Southampton County Administrator Mike Johnson and Southampton Supervisor Barry Porter. Bottom; Brian Hedgepeth, FSEDI board member; Amanda Jarratt, FSEDI CEO, Jim and Lisa Strozier, Highground Services owners, Felicia Blow, FSEDI board member, and E. Warren Beale, FSEDI board chairman PHOTOS BY CAIN MADDEN

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Highground Services celebrates graduating from Franklin Incubator Top; John Warren, left, Connie Cornwell and Billy Cornwell.

Middle; Becky Jester, left, Kim Edwards and Robbie Purvis.

Bottom; Ellis Cofield Jr., left, Carolyn Purvis and Julie Griggs.

PHOTOS BY CAIN MADDEN

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Boykins Pumpkin Fest Top left; Adam True and his daughter, Summer True, 5, came in from Skippers, Virginia, for the Boykins Pumpkin Festival. Bottom left; at the car show are David Eure of Portsmouth with his grandson, Donald Shinault, 8, of Courtland. Bottom right; Catherine Jones and her daughter, Kendal Jones, 4, drove in from Windsor for the occasion.

PHOTOS BY STEPHEN H. COWLES

western tidewater living

m o c t o d s w s e w n e r N e t t s a e t w a e L d e h ti t o yt e K r You

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Boykins Pumpkin Fest Below; Earline Davis of Boykins poses at the car show at the Boykins Pumpkin Fest.

Top right; Jason Raney with Charity Raney, Hannah Raney and Angie Raney of Roanoke Rapids, North Carolina. Middle right; Micaela Fisk, left with Blaine Fisk of Suffolk. Bottom right; Adam Strohl, left, with Riley Strohl of Suffolk. With them are Kristin Strohl, who’s holding a neighbor’s son, Easton Fisk.

PHOTOS BY STEPHEN H. COWLES

western tidewater living

what to do TUESDAY, DEC. 16 Basic contractor license: A “Basic Contractor Business Licensing” course will take place from 5 to 9 p.m. on Tuesday, Dec. 16, and Thursday, Dec. 18, at Paul D. Camp Community College’s Regional Workforce Development Center, 100 N. College Dr., Franklin. The cost, which includes the textbook, is $175. For more information, contact the Workforce Development office at 569-6050, or visit www.pdc.edu/workforce-development.

Parkinson’s Support Group: The next Franklin-Area Parkinson’s Disease (and other Movement Disorders) Support Group Meeting will be at 6 p.m. in the auditorium of Southampton Memorial Hospital’s East Pavilion (in the basement). This meeting will be a Christmas pot luck dinner. Patients, caregivers, family members and friends are welcome. Call Doug or Grace Boyce at 562-4432 or email Doug at dboyce124@gmail.com to let us know you are coming and what you plan to bring.

Christmas Wine’d Down and Paint: From 6 to 8 p.m., come and paint with Twyla Duke of Artfully Yours! at the Rawls Museum Arts in Courtland. No experience is necessary to have a glass of wine and a good time, and create your own painting. In this session, students will paint “Christmas Joy.” Twyla will guide you step by step to a finished painting. Bring a friend and wind down.

Doors open at 5:30 p.m. for refreshments.

Painting begins at 6 p.m. Must be 21 or older. Your spot will not be considered held unless you pay when you sign up.

Please sign up one week in advance.

WEDNESDAY, DEC. 17 Wine and Paint: Wednesday evening 6 to 9 pm. Artist Sarah Hair leads students of all levels through painting a colorful acrylic canvas. Lots of fun with good wine and good friends. Everyone leaves with a finished painting. All materials supplied.

Fee $45 for members, $65 non-members.

Register now by calling 357-7707 or visit the Arts Center at 319 Main St., in Historic Downtown Smithfield. (www.SmithfieldArts.org).

Blood drive: A blood drive will be from 2 to 6 p.m. at Tucker Swamp Baptist Church, 37527 Seacock Chapel Rd., Zuni.

AARP meeting: The AARP Chapter No. 5309 monthly meeting and annual potluck lunch will be at 10 a.m. at the Windsor Ruritan Clubhouse, 14 Community Drive. The topic : “How AARP Can Help You Discover Real Possibilities.”

Magic show: The Walter Cecil Rawls Library will have a holiday magic show at 5 p.m.

THURSDAY, DEC. 18 Photos with Santa: The Walter Cecil Rawls Library in Courtland will have photos with Santa from 6 to 7:30 p.m. There is no charge, but please bring non-perishable food items for the Salvation Army. This event is sponsored by Franklin-Southampton Area United Way and Blackwater Regional Library.

Bingo night: Come play bingo with the Newsoms Ruritans at 7 p.m. There will be nine games played for just $10. Buy a pack of 9 and the second pack of 9 is just $5. The last three game-cards are $2 each. There are 12 chances to win cash. A 50/50 raffle will also take place. Jackpot is more than $100. In November, the lucky winner took home more than $700. The event takes place at 29204 Main Street at the Ruritan Building. Hot dogs, chips and drinks will be on sale at 6:30 p.m. and calling begins at 7 p.m. For more information, call Betty Darden at 757-654-6355.

FRIDAY, DEC. 19 Tree-Lighting Ceremony: The Partners Among Cats and Canines (PACC) will have its annual Tree of Lights Ceremony at 6:30 p.m. at Fred’s Restaurant. Lights can be purchased for $5 or $25 in honor or memory of a special animal/person that has touched your life. All proceeds benefit animal rescue! Details at www.pacconline.org.

Blood drive: A blood drive will be at the Isle of Wight Ruritan Club House, 17011 Courthouse Hwy., Windsor, from 1 to 6 p.m.

SATURDAY, DEC. 20 Eco Fashionista Bracelet: Come relax, have fun and design your own wrapped-wire and glass bead bracelet (red and white) with artist Juliette MarShall from 10 a.m.

to noon. All materials and tools are supplied so you can focus on color, texture and style. The fee is $50 ($70 for non-members) plus a $15 materials fee and includes everything you need. Please register by 5 p.m. two days prior to class. Register by calling 357-7707 or visit the Arts Center at 319 Main St., in Historic Downtown Smithfield. (www.SmithfieldArts.org)

SUNDAY, DEC. 28 Kids Paint: Sunday afternoon 2 to 4 p.m. it’s a painting party for kids to learn real art concepts and techniques. All materials supplied and everyone leaves with a finished painting. Fee $35 for members, $55 non-members. Register now by calling 357-7707 or visit the Arts Center at 319 on Main Street in Historic Downtown Smithfield. (www.SmithfieldArts.org).

WEDNESDAY, DEC. 31 New Year’s Eve Gala: The Airfield Conference Center will have a New Year’s Eve Gala titled “Last Night-First Night” from 6:30 p.m. to 12:30 a.m. For more information, call Airfield Conference Center at 899-4901 or visit www.airfieldconference.com. The Airfield Conference Center is located at 151859 Airfield Rd., Wakefield.

THURSDAY, JAN. 1 New Year’s Day brunch: The Airfield Conference Center will have a New Year’s Day brunch. For more information, call Airfield Conference Center at 899-4901 or visit www.airfieldconference.com. The Airfield Conference Center is located at 151859 Airfield Rd., Wakefield.

FRIDAY, FEB. 6 Nursing program anniversary: Paul D. Camp Community College will celebrate the 10th anniversary of its Registered Nursing Program from 6 to 9 p.m. at the Hilton Garden Inn and Suffolk Conference Center in Suffolk. There will be heavy hors d’oeuvres, music and a short program honoring staff and students. Tickets are $35 per person. Sponsorships are available.

Proceeds will be used to establish an endowed nursing scholarship in honor of Dr. Candace Rogers, who jumpstarted the program and is instrumental in its continued success. Visit http://www.pdc.edu/nursingevent for tickets or call 569-6790 for more information.

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Kathy Whitfield of Capron decorates her snowman Christmas tree.

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The

Christmas Tree Lady story and photos by Cain Madden

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athy Whitfield never celebrated a birthday growing up beyond adding a year to her age. There wasn’t much around Thanksgiving time.

But then you got to Christmas. That was always special.

“We only got something once a year,” she said. “It was Christmas. I’ll never forget the smells. You would smell the cookies baking, the cake.”

Whitfield was one of six children, and their father died when she was 3 years old. So the mother, Isabella Warren, had to make difficult choices.

“It wasn’t easy for her during that time, rearing children alone,” Whitfield said, but all of that would go out the door around Christmas. “It was the time of year where it wasn’t about paying the bills and all of those things — it was about us.

“She made sure that was our happy time, no matter what the hardship was.

And the thing about mom — it wasn’t about spending a lot of money— it was about love. It’s not about how much something costs.”

In the four-room house in Sedley with the wood-burning stove, it was always important that they have a Christmas tree.

“She would get a little pine tree or something else from the wooded area,” Whitfield said. “She would put some lights on it, and some tinsel. At that time, I thought it was the prettiest thing in the world.

“Looking back, it was probably more of a ‘Charlie Brown Tree,’ but to us it was special.”

Christmas time was also a great time in Western Tidewater back then.

“It seems like everyone slowed down from everything else that was going on, and Christmas time was just a happy time for everybody,” Whitfield said. “I can remember riding down the streets and looking at all the lights, and I was always like, ‘Wow, this is awesome.’ The

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26 western tidewater living Camp family would always have Santa coming out of their chimney. It was a special time of year for everybody.”

So when she had children, two girls and a boy, Christmas had to be special.

“I wanted them to feel the warmth, that magical mystical feeling at Christmas time,” Whitfield said. “We always had the biggest tree in our neighborhood and all of the gifts I could muster up. It wasn’t about money. We are not wealthy people by any definition of wealth. You have what you have, and you put it out there with love.”

“It is almost like mom transforms into the Christmas Fairy around that time of year,” Whitfield’s oldest, Catina Woodley, said. “We’d go to bed at a certain time, and we’d wake up, and I’d think, ‘How’d she get all of these things in this room in a short amount of time?’ As I grew up, so grew my appreciation for the time and energy that went into making that day special for us.”

And she puts a lot of time into the season. During these past few years, she’s decorated every room in her house, along with a big chunk of the outside, with the Christmas Spirit. It’s gotten to the point when she goes out into public that people often stop her and ask, “Are you the Christmas Tree Lady?”

Her home in Capron wasn’t always like that. It all began 33 years ago with one tree.

“My masterpiece, which really kind of got us into the Christmas tree thing, was my Angel Tree,” she said. “Every year at the start of Christmas, I would buy a new angel. Now, everybody buys a new angel.

“But every year, people would come in, and be like, ‘Wow, this is an amazing tree.’”

For most of her Christmases, she was just putting up one tree, but she put a lot of effort into it.

“I remember my nephew said to me, ‘Aunt Kathy, when I was a little kid, I thought y’all were rich,’” Whitfield said

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of James Britt, who is now an adult in college. “The reason he said that is because of that Christmas Tree. It was the biggest tree he had ever seen.

“That really made me feel good. Out of everything in life, he remembers the Christmas Tree.”

Then in 2012, when she retired from the Department of Corrections as a councilor, she decided to go all out for Christmas.

Whitfield did this to celebrate and to hopefully inspire the Christmas spirit in others.

That year, she put up 14 Christmas Trees — that was one for every room in her home.

It’s escalated from there.

“We got so much support and love from that, and we decided to upscale it to 25 last year,” Whitfield said.

This year, she was inspired to add five more trees to bring it to a grand total of 30.

“I always wanted my home to be so full of love and so full of joy, that when people came in, they could just feel the warmth,” Whitfield said. “Even now today I get so

Kathy Whitfield makes all of her bows by hand.

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Catina Woodley, left, and her mother, Kathy Whitfield, work to decorate the Snowman tree in her dining room.

Donnie Whitfield helps by organizing and packing all of the boxes. He says there are a lot of boxes.

excited when people come in and say, ‘Oh my goodness, look at the tree!’ That gives me such a joy.”

Whitfield’s house isn’t even large by any standard. It’s a one-story 14-room, including bathrooms and compartmentalized dining rooms and a kitchen, brick home on a farm, but Whitfield said its not about size.

“A lot of people ask, ‘How big is your house,’” she said. “I always say, ‘It’s big enough to accommodate every heart in the world.’

You share what you have. It may be small, but you share it on a big scale.”

Sharing the holiday love is her way of giving back.

“In our modern society, everything is just kind of not a big deal.

I still want the simple things in life to be a big deal,” Whitfield said.

“People would bring their kids over last year, and say, ‘I’m not putting up a tree this year. We don’t go all out. But I want them to know

an old-fashioned Christmas, what it looks like, what it feels like.’

“Christmas is my favorite time of year. I just love the holiday cheer, and I guess this is my way of giving back, to what was given to me as a small child.”

That’s not to say the work is easy.

Whitfield estimates that it takes her 2-3 weeks to get everything up, and that often includes staying up until 4:30 a.m. carefully placing every ornament and more.

“Every bow has to be handmade, and nobody can help me,” she said. “You can hand me an ornament, but I have to put every ornament on the tree. Once it’s started, I want to see it finished.”

Then there is the storage of all of the ornaments, the thousands and thousands of ornaments.

“It’s a lot of pulling in and out for my husband,” Whitfield said of Donnie, who is also retired from the Department of Corrections.

“My husband is so funny every

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year. ‘Look at all of this stuff — that doesn’t make any sense,’ he’ll say.

And as he brings out boxes, he’ll complain and complain. But every year, he always ends up inviting more people than I do.”

Whitfield is also thinking about it all year long, and she said almost anything can become an ornament for a tree. It’s not about spending a lot, either.

“After Christmas, ornaments are 80 percent off,” she said. “Estate sales are amazing, and I like going to flea markets and consignment shops. I’m always thinking about a theme.

“And it’s not just me. People know the joy this gives me, and I get a lot of gifts.”

Of course, her “everything can become an ornament” philosophy can sometimes backfire.

“My grandson collects trains, and he hides them from me,” she said with a laugh. “He is afraid I’m going to take them and put them on the tree.”

All of the work was worth it when she sees the faces of the people who come in.

“It’s a joy just to see the faces and especially maybe of some of the people that can’t have that type of Christmas. Whatever it is, they just aren’t able. But you have children coming in, saying, ‘Oh, this is so nice.’ They’ve never seen anything like it.”

The reactions are priceless. Last year, several of Woodley’s cowork-

ers came by from Capron Elementary bringing their own children.

“They were so excited,” Whitfield said. “That really gave me so much energy as well. That’s one reason I’m excited about doing it this year.

They are just so excited, the jumping around, the dancing. It’s just fun.”

Children aren’t the only ones who really get into it.

“I took my daughter to the hospital yesterday,” Whitfield said in November. “It was Obici in Suffolk, and one of the nurses, she said, ‘Oh, you are the Christmas Tree Lady!’ She was so excited to come by this year.”

Inspiring others also makes her feel good.

“Some of the mothers who came in have incorporated more trees in their homes,” Woodley said. “And at Capron Elementary, a lot of the teachers have incorporated themes into their rooms.”

Her Christmas decorations are also turning into a Western Tidewater event.

“Calvin Barnes with Barnes Painting Company — even he’s gotten into it,” Whitfield said. “I had him painting my house, and he was like, ‘This is going to look so nice with the trees.’ The lady from Classy Corner is doing some window treatments, and she is like, ‘This is going to look so good with this.’

“Everybody wants a piece of it — it’s beginning to be a community thing.”

“Everybody wants a piece of it — it’s beginning to be a community thing.”

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Catina Woodley, Whitfield’s daughter, decorates the Nativity scene.

And then there’s what it does for her, just being in the season.

“When thinking about Christmas, I think of the birth of Christ — That is important to me. It keeps me in remembrance of who I am,” Whitfield said.

But then there’s the rest of it — the “mystical” feeling it gives her.

“I just enjoy Christmas,” Whitfield said.

“It is almost like I turn into this big kid during Christmas. I love Christmas. I love the decorating. I love the lights. I love the smiles.”

Being able to share everything with her family is also wonderful. There’s Catina Woodley; Temekka Whitfield, and her children, Cierra and Tamia; and Donavan Whitfield, and his children, Donavan Jr. and Donte. They all have trees dedicated to them, too.

“My boys have the snowman tree — I took pictures of it and sent it to them, and they also saw it on YouTube,” Whitfield said of DoYouTube video link

navan Jr. and Donte, who live in Illinois.

“They were more excited than the girls. The girls were a little excited. They were excited about the McDonald’s tree with all the McDonald’s toys.”

Her children get into it, too, even Donavan in Illinois, and Woodley was also allowed to break one of her rules and help her with decorations.

“She’ll probably go behind me and change it,” Woodley said with a laugh.

“Sometimes, she’ll ask dad and I what we think about how something looks, and then she’ll do the opposite. It’s got to be her way.”

Of Donovan, Whitfield said, “He is always like, ‘How embarrassing is this?’ But the other day, he called going to McDonalds to make sure I had some of the American Dolls when they were there. Oh yeah, he enjoys it.”

The House of 30 Trees has multiple trees in each room. New this year will be trees celebrating The Smurfs, Hello Kitty, Mickey Mouse, The Chipmunks and The Disney Princesses. Some of the others include the

Grinch Tree, the Village, McDonalds Toys, the Fun Tree, her Victorian Tree — which was obtained at an estate sale — and her Angel Tree, which has more than 10,000 ornaments on it and had been opened up to showings before she started upscaling.

The home will be open on weekends starting on Dec. 5, and the grand open house will be on Dec. 20. The open house will take place from 3 p.m. to 6 p.m. Everything will go back to normal by the New Year, Whitfield said. For more information on weekend showings, contact Woodley at 434-594-5642.

While she said this may be her last year doing it, Whitfield said that she claimed the same thing last year.

“My husband and I are getting a little older, and we are just starting a ministry, Garden of Prayer Family Worship, and our attention may be needed elsewhere,” she said. “But, I don’t know. I may be coerced.

As soon as I hear that first Christmas carol, it’s going to get my adrenaline going, and I’ll get right back into that Christmas Spirit.

It has been such an amazing ride.”

western tidewater living

where am I?

In each edition, our magazine staff provides a challenge of sorts for readers, testing how much of Western Tidewater they really know. We photograph a scene in Western Tidewater that is visible to motorists or pedestrians.

Whoever can identify the location pictured above will be entered for a chance to win a $25 gift certificate to any one of our partner advertisers.

For the fall edition, the photo was taken of the high water marker by the Blackwater River at Barrett’s Landing in Franklin. Photo by Cain Madden.

So, if you know where this issue’s photo was taken, let us know. If you’re right, you could be a winner. E-mail your answers to magazine@tidewaternews.com Go out and enjoy Western Tidewater!

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T

a C e h

f o l l B

n o d ran y

stor

ain

by C

e h t

h s i r r Pa den

Mad

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S e

A

n ideal day for Brandon Parrish is for it to be below freezing and for the ground to be covered in a fresh coat of snow. That might seem odd, as he’s originally from Franklin.

“My family thinks I’m crazy, but I’ve always been a bit different in that sense,” he

said.

On those days, Parrish feels the call of the mountains, the slopes and his snowboard.

“I love it. I go every chance I get,” he said. “The goal each season is 100 days riding, but that’s really hard to attain with the shorter east coast winters and working a desk job. I think I’ve ended up in the high 80s for days the past three years living in Burlington, [Vermont].”

In Burlington, he’s the photo editor for Burton, and one of his favorite things about the job is the flexibility it gives him.

“They value their employees and do a lot to make sure people are happy there,” Parrish said. “During the summers, we

have flex Fridays where we can leave at noon to get an early start on the weekend, and in the winter, we have a ride policy where we can go snowboarding in the morning as long as we are in by noon. We work a couple of extra hours in the evenings, of course, and the whole thing is considering you’re still getting your work done. It’s rarely abused, and it’s so nice to be able to go play around for a few hours before work, before sitting down for a lot of the day. It helps keep us young!”

The passion started more than 10 years ago, when he was still in college at North Carolina State University.

“I had a group of friends at NC State who were really into snowboarding, which is kind of where I got my first real taste,” Parrish said. “I remember hanging out in my buddy’s dorm room one day, and I picked up a Burton consumer cata-

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34 western tidewater living log — it was the 1999 season to be exact — and I was just blown away at the locations and the action photos that I was seeing.”

Growing up in Franklin, he hadn’t really had the opportunity to be exposed to it, though he did love surfing and skateboarding.

“My parents were on the caboose of the technology train when it came to having a computer with an internet connection, so access to a still relatively young sport at the time was a bit late for me, especially considering events at that point in time weren’t nearly as big and didn’t have close to the amount of coverage that they do now,” Parrish said. “There was an address of a shop on the back of the catalog, Vertical Urge in Raleigh, North Carolina, and to this day that place is still my favorite board shop of all time. The owner, Todd [Canipe], there sold me my first snowboard setup, and I’ve been hooked ever since.”

Snowboarding also ultimately ended up being his career, though that wasn’t always the goal. After sophomore year in Raleigh, he transferred to James Madison University because it had a better marketing program at the time, and it also had a Music Industry Business minor.

At the time, he was convinced he wanted to make a career out of the music industry. It was one of his first loves, and the path it took him on led him to what he’s doing today.

“I enjoy music tremendously,” Parrish said. “I dabble in guitar, and have a pretty sweet collection of those.”

As far as why he loves music, he said it’s just in his blood. His father, Larry Parrish, can play almost any instrument you put in his hands, and his favorites are the guitar and the keyboard/piano. And dating back before Parrish and his brother, Ryan, were born, his father had played in bands.

“I started playing guitar somewhere around fifth or sixth grade,” he said. “My

dad is an amazing musician. Growing up he and his buddies would get together at our house and just jam every week or so.

My brother and I always had so much fun hanging out and listening to them play.

“I actually think my brother got most of the musical talent handed down to him, but I still enjoy it.”

So, with that love, he started interning for a music label between his junior and senior year of college in Los Angeles. He cultivated some contacts while there, and those sprouted into job offers. However, it wasn’t quite all it was cracked up to be.

“When I graduated from JMU, I had reached a point where I realized that if I was going to work in the music industry, I was going to have to sacrifice a lot of other things in life,” he said. “I had a few offers to work for different record labels, but the salaries were nothing short

of insulting. I had interned and proved my knowledge and skills, but the annual salaries that were being offered were way shy of even earning minimum wage.”

If he took those offers, he would have a foot in the door of the music industry, but the sacrifices would have including giving up snowboarding, as he would not have been able to afford it.

Still, the son of Nancy and Larry Parrish packed up and moved to California in 2004, with his best friend from Franklin, Beau Thomason, who still lives in Long Beach, California. Parrish’s goal was to get a job at Forum Snowboards, which was his favorite snowboard brand at the time. And being in the epicenter of the action sports scene, he figured he’d rise up fast.

“I had two jobs. One was working full time at a snowboard shop, where I figured

western tidewater living The wrap of a shoot they did in the Adirondacks of New York. In the group photo are some of Parrish’s coworkers at Burton, including three of the team riders, Danny Davis, Mark Sollors and Cilka Sidar; a female model, the creative marketing director, brand marketing director, a stylist and a hair/ makeup artist.

Brandon Parrish on Mammoth Mountain, which is in eastern California along the Sierra Nevada mountain range.

Parrish once worked in Wyoming as part of the Park and Pipe crew. In the summer, he was building mountain bike trails. Working outside was amazing — he said he didn’t have to try to stay in shape and the views were amazing.

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36 western tidewater living with a college education was a fast track to meeting reps and getting a foot in the door that way,” Parrish said. “The other was a full time job at Urban Outfitters.”

It wasn’t getting hired at Urban Outfitters that got him his break toward that goal — it was actually a friendship he made during the interview process.

“When I got hired there, one of the girls that had interviewed with me and I got to chatting, and I realized that she was interning for the summer in the Marketing Department at... Forum Snowboards,” Parrish said about his dream job. “When she left the internship to go back to school, she put in a word with her boss there, who ended up bringing me in as an intern, who then ended up hiring me full time as a Marketing Coordinator.”

There, he worked on layout for ads and catalogs, and was in charge of taking pictures for all three brands of The Program — Forum Snowboards, Special Blend and Foursquare — for the website.

“All of this for someone who’d never opened up an Adobe Creative Suite program before, or used a studio camera setup,” Parrish said. “Luckily, I was able to pick up things quickly, and learned a lot from our creative crew there. It was kind of like going back to school for my stint there, but with way cooler content!”

These brands were subsidiaries of Burton, which had produced the catalog that originally got him into snowboarding back in 1999. In 2009, those brands moved from California to Vermont to be closer to the Burton main office in Burlington.

A few years after those jobs went to Vermont, so too did Parrish.

“My boss from The Program took a job as Creative Director of Marketing with Burton a few months before that whole move went down,” he said of Evan Rose. “I stayed in touch with him over the years, and when I was ready to start working on a career again, he helped me

get back in the door with Burton.”

Now, he’s the Photo Editor for Burton.

He said it is a bit of an unconventional title, as he doesn’t really take photos, though he said that’s a dream of his long term.

“Essentially, I manage the entire photo database for Burton,” Parrish said. “I work with a team of three staff field photographers who travel full time with our team and shoot all of the action and lifestyle imagery of those guys. They submit all of their images directly to me, and I catalog, do any color correction necessary, and select and distribute photo assets for all of the creative marketing campaigns across all media.”

Summers and fall are the busiest times of the year, as they ready for their winter marketing season, but he’s got enough to keep him busy all year.

“We do a lot of Photoshopping in our world. Not to deceive people, but colors change a lot, and different trims like buttons and zippers on jackets and pants get changed and moved, and we have to make sure our imagery accurately reflects what customers are going to get,” Parrish said. “This involves working with several project managers at one time, who all think that their project is the ‘most important,’ so it definitely get chaotic during these times.

“It keeps it interesting though, and the days fly by. I’m not saying that my job is completely safe, but it does instill some sense of job security to know that if any of us weren’t there that things could fall apart.”

He also gets to go out on photoshoots.

Last year, he got to go to Puerto Rico for 10 days during January, which was just in time for temperatures to reach negative double digit figures in Burlington.

“We were just hanging out working in 80 degree sunny weather,” Parrish said.

The best part of the photoshoots is the scouting, Parrish said.

“Once we get to a location, we always

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try to allow a couple of days before hand to just cruise around and familiarize ourselves with the lay of the land, and go check out spots that might work for the shots that we want to get,” he said. “It’s also always really fun to see how different photographers work and handle different situations. I’ve definitely learned a lot about photography just from observation.”

Usually, Parrish said, the models are great to work with. But sometimes, you’ll get someone just modeling for a little bit of extra cash, and that can make the experience tougher.

For instance, one time he was working with a minimal crew of four people including a male model, and the model had just gotten off from a few months of touring with his band.

“He hadn’t washed his hair in weeks, and it was definitely showing in the photos,” Parrish said.

It didn’t help that the stylist on site had not brought any dry shampoo or powder. So, they had to keep putting different hats on him until they ran out of hats and the photographer finally had enough of it.

“The photographer stopped shooting at one point and said, ‘Dude, can you do me a huge favor and wash your greasy ass hair tonight when you get back to the hotel?’ We all just lost it laughing for a bit, and the model was really cool about it and apologized and agreed to do so,” Parrish said. “He was a rad dude, and his band is pretty big and recognizable.”

Modeling is a skill, Parrish said, and it’s pretty obvious, even when just looking at the pictures back at the home base, what type of model they have.

“It’s so apparent when I look through hundreds of photos from a particular scene, and when it’s hard to pick which

ones are the best because they are all good, as opposed to where there are hundreds of photos, and it’s hard to find one that is passable because the subject just looks so awkward in most of them,” he said.

It’s all good, though. Parrish loves photography.

“I like going out to shoot photos any chance I get. I rarely go anywhere without a camera these days. I guess that’s the case with anybody that has a cell phone, but I either take my DSLR or a 35mm film SLR with me wherever I go,” Parrish said. “I don’t work professionally shooting yet, but I have shot a couple of weddings for friends, and occasionally shoot behind the scenes photos on shoots for work. Otherwise, I just shoot my friends when we’re out dorking around camping, exploring and finding new swim holes, hiking, traveling or whatever.”

Ultimately, it’s what he hopes to do for

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“Snowboarding is definitely a part of my life that I cherish and will continue to be a part of it as long as I am able...” a living, perhaps even starting a business with his brother, Ryan, who is store manager of the Guitar Center in Thousand Oaks, California.

For now, though, he lives with his girlfriend Catherine Wright, who is also from Franklin.

“We have a black cat named Rosa that we adopted from the Humane Society a couple of years ago,” Parrish said. “So, I suppose my two Cats are my family these days.”

Speaking of family, he can’t wait until Christmas.

“I always look forward to coming home for Christmas. It’s the one time each year that I know I’m going to get to see all of my family at once. We’re all very close, and there’s nobody I’d rather get together with. We always have a ball,” Parrish said.

It’s going to be tough this year, though, as the family lost the last of their grandparents. But he’ll always remember them, partially thanks to his guitars.

“My grandparents gave me some money when I graduated high school, and with some of the money I’d saved up from detailing cars, I went and bought the SG,” Parrish said of his Gibson SG 61 Reissue in Heritage Cherry. “I’m not sure that’s how they imagined me spending that money, but I’ll have that guitar for as long as I live.”

No matter what, though, he knows Christmas will be good in the Parrish household.

“Otherwise, I’ll come home and probably gain ten pounds from eating like there is no tomorrow,” Parrish said.

“Most of the people in my family are excellent cooks, and it’s always hard to stop

eating when I’m back home. Not to mention that nobody up here knows much about collards, pulled pork, Brunswick Stew and all of those other really healthy things we eat in the South.”

In the end, he’ll always be called back to the mountains.

“Ryan and a bunch of our friends and I always joke about all moving back to Franklin and buying or taking over certain places and trying to turn them around,” Parrish said. “It’s always pretty fun and funny to talk about. I think I like the mountains too much to move back there really, though.

“Snowboarding is definitely a part of my life that I cherish and will continue to be a part of it as long as I am able, regardless of whether I am working in the industry or not.”

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column by Leah Lewis photo submitted

S

ilos remind me of my childhood.

Sometimes they look architectural. Sometimes they feel intrusive.

In the spring they stand empty and dark against a vibrant landscape. In the middle of summer they melt into the haze, as if waiting for the crop that is waiting for the rain. Then fall comes, and they are full and bursting with harvest. But seeing silos in the winter – that is my favorite. It is as if the big mounds, rising tall and solid, slumber in peace. Sometimes, when they are blanketed in snow or frost or ice, I see them rest, calm and sure of the seasons to come.

For some, these silos represent a normality that is imbedded in a lifestyle, often forgotten. They represent a heritage and hard labor and a simple life.

I remember the first time I climbed to the top of the sixty-foot structure as a little girl – it was winter, and it was an experience that took years to complete with a courage that was slow in coming.

Every time I ventured to climb the tower, it got a little smaller and less intimidating. Eventually I made it to the top and looked out. I looked far and wide. The view before me was well worth the wait.

After that, I climbed the silos freely and without fear, always anticipating the gift I would receive upon reaching

the top. Someone once told me that the experience was a necessary component of my childhood, growing up on a farm.

My father has recollections, of when he was young, and the structures were flat on top with a large amount of space. He would climb the ladder at night and sleep at the peak under the stars. I cherish this memory of his, just as I cherish the building that made the memory possible. It is the same building that participated in many fond memories of my own.

For my friends and I, climbing that ladder became a frequent occurrence. For those of us who had already conquered the challenge, I remember knowing that a little fear was nothing compared to the feeling of complete satisfaction and triumph that would inevitably follow.

And I will always remember the first time I made it to the top and was rewarded by the view. The intensity of the event is exaggerated every time I see the beautiful silhouette of similar structures against the cold, winter horizon. And I am thankful.

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Dail Gray, Betty Johnson and Keith Edwards of the Back Porch and Grille

western tidewater living

It takes

a Village to raise a

restaurant story by Cain Madden photos by Alyn Brown / O’Neal Studio of Photography

W

hen you make good food for a living, it’s important to get a workout. Luckily, for Dail Gray, if you walk from one end of his kitchen to the other, you’ve essentially done a lap around a high school track.

It’s got to be big when you are feeding more than 7,000 people a month, and that’s just the residents of The Village at Woods Edge. When Gray factors in the Back Porch and Grille — these days, he’s serving more than 200 folks a day in house and sending out more than 50 takeout orders.

“It is very multifaceted, which has made it very challenging,” Gray said. “When you brought that public element in here, now my telephone and email blows up all day long.

That’s a good thing, of course, as long as you can stay ahead of it.”

Gray said one thing that has helped them remain ahead is that the growth has been organic. When they opened up the Back Porch, business was not up to the ceiling.

Over time, Gray and head chef Betty Johnson were able to bring in some people. They hired Keith Edwards, who was well known in the restaurant business in Downtown Frank-

lin at Simply Divine, and he brought in a set of clientele with him. After that, Heather Friis came over from the Cyprus Cove Country Club. And with her, came even more clientele.

And from Courtland, Fran Neave was brought in from For Pete’s Sake, and she too brought folks over. Word started to spread, and Gray said today it’s grown into an explosive business.

“It did start off a little bit differently than what it has become,” Gray said. “There are a lot of things that we do differently here because we don’t want to infringe on the residents, as they are our primary goal here.”

But, they did start the Back Porch to turn a profit just like every other restaurant, so they’ve worked to blend it in a way where the public and the resident components come together to work.

It all started when Gray returned to the Village, and he brought Johnson along with him.

Not long after coming back, he built a business plan for the Back Porch and put it on Village Director Rhonda Stewart’s desk.

“It was a little smaller and a little different than what we ended up with, but it grew over time,” Gray said. “They [Village leadership] bit

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42 western tidewater living on it, and now I’ve definitely got my hands full.”

It’s one of a few places like it in the country. Gray said he knew of only one other retirement community that had something similar.

“I know through the emails I get with other directors across the country that a lot of people want to do what we have done,” he said. “I have shared information with them, but I am really trying to perfect what I’ve got here before I try to pitch it to others. I think it might be a sellable commodity in the end.”

Originally, the restaurant was supposed to be geared toward the residents, Johnson said.

“We wanted to give the residents a different venue to eat at, an alternative to the

daily dining room experience,” she said. “It gives them a place to go out without having to actually go out.”

Gray said, however, that he believed it would be the next generation of residents — 4-5 years down the road — that really took advantage of it, once it was established. From that thought, they considered opening the Back Porch to the public.

“Franklin definitely needed this type of restaurant — the area didn’t really have one of these venues. So, we opened it up to the

public. And, I tell you, I have been working in the food industry for more than 25 years, and I’ve never seen the kind of explosive growth that we’ve experienced in the last month or two,” Gray said back in September. “I have never seen a restaurant that is basically doubling business every single week.”

The menu has been the toughest thing, Johnson said.

“We have to watch what the residents will pay, but at the same time, not give them the same stuff that they are already getting on a monthly basis,” she said. “But at the same time, also gear it toward higher clientele too.”

“That was the real issue,” Gray agreed.

“When you look at the resident population, and the age that we have here, and then you look at the core of Franklin, the big trick with fixing this menu was figuring out how to satisfy both.

“That was kind of like trying to make both sides of the river meet.”

Judging by the success, Gray thinks they’ve done it, but it was a lot of hard work on the staff. Of the first menu back

in 2013, he said he sat down and wrote the original draft. Johnson took it from there and added her input. She, in turn, brought it to her cooks for their input. Stewart also played a role, Gray said. And from there, the customers have also had their say.

“A lot of the things that were on that original menu are still there today, but we have evolved as we have found our clientele,” he said. “It was a collaborative effort, which includes Rhonda up front, and it has basically evolved depending on what the clientele wants.”

The Back Porch also has some talented young chefs, including Chris Miller, who they brought from the Vintage Tavern in Williamsburg.

“He has got one

of the best palates that I have ever run into,” Gray said. “He has put together several items that we have run as specials that have now become main stays on the menu. Same with Heather.”

Gray said he wants his staff to contribute ideas to the restaurant — he doesn’t want it to just be he and Johnson making all the decisions.

“I tell them all the time: ‘I didn’t just hire you for your hands and your feet. I want your mind too. You have come from a different road than what I have come down, maybe I am going to learn something from

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you,’” Gray said. “I learn something from them every day.”

Johnson, who lives in Courtland, said they bring a lot of new ideas to the table, ideas they never thought about when she was in culinary school. Sometimes, though, they take it too far.

“We’ve kind of had to put them down a little bit too because we are in Southampton County, and some of the stuff has to be Southampton County,” she said.

“Sometimes the younger chefs get blinders on. They want to have their artistic expression,” Gray added. “But I want to sell to the customers, so the customers are really who drives the menu.”

Gray said the menu, which is made up of mostly traditional Southern items, some of it with a twist, is not small, but it’s manageable.

“It is not overblown like a chain restaurant,” he said. “On those, you can’t hardly decipher out what is an entree and what is

an appetizer.”

At lunch time, Johnson said that the junior club sandwich is probably the most popular item, with the wraps, the rosemary chicken salad and the crab cakes coming in next. Gray said whatever the special is will probably be the number one item, though he agreed about the junior club.

“We stack it up really high with meat, and it seems to be a favorite of a lot of people,” he said.

At lunch time, a factor in what’s selling most is how the business has evolved.

When business really started to pick up, the staff wasn’t the size it is now.

“I think one of the reasons the specials, the clubs, and those things sell more maybe goes back to the days when we were struggling to keep up with the volume,” Gray said. “And now that we are not, people are still coming in a lunch time, and they are in a hurry to get back to work. They know a club is something that we don’t have to

cook. You toast the bread, you put it together and it goes out the door.”

Now, he said, they can deal with the volume and full menu at lunch and get stuff to people fast, but not all of the clientele has realized that.

“We turned more than 200 people through here the other day and I don’t think we had one table that was lagging.

We just hired two new cooks to come in because the holiday season is looking so busy that if I didn’t get some people in here, we were not going to survive,” he said with a laugh. “It gives them a good chance to prove themselves, and we’ll see how business holds when the holidays are done.”

At dinner time, Gray said the crab cakes sell really well, and from there the shrimp and grits and prime rib. Johnson said the pork BBQ, which is made in house, also tends to move well.

That’s mostly amongst the general public, which Gray said is probably a good 60

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44 western tidewater living percent of the clientele. Many of the residents, particularly the older ones, tend to go with lighter and less expensive items, like the chicken salad or hot dogs.

And dinner, Gray added, has a membership. He said people can try it once or twice without it, but they wanted the membership option for security reasons with a

large elderly population in the area. They needed to be able to control who was in the building at night time.

“The residents are the most important to us,” Gray said. “They are what built this place and are what’s allowed us to do all of these things.”

As far as specials, Johnson said the pot

roast is always big, as are the seasonal menu items based on whatever’s fresh at the time, and then there are the specials that have become menu items. Miller once created an apple pork sandwich as a special.

“It has fried apples and onions and cheddar cheese, and it is really stacked up beautifully,” Gray said.

As far as how the specials get there, Gray said it’s a process. Johnson said they sit down, put their brains together and make them up.

They’ll then bring it to Gray to taste, and he’ll either approve it or say that it’s missing something.

“Betty brought me a special today, and I told her that it was good,” he said. “She then brought me the sauce and I told her it was a little sour on the end. So she sweetened it up with a little honey.

“Specials are really like everything else — it’s a collaborative effort.”

The business also books and caters banquets. Gray said the Christmas season was booked up to Dec. 23 and starting back again on Dec. 26 going into the New Year.

He said it’s basically been booked since December of last year.

“People call me, and they will want to know what can we do,” Gray said. “The real question is, ‘what can’t we do?’ If you can tell me where you want to go with something, I don’t think there is anything this team can’t put together. We send out deliveries, make cakes, and do a little bit of everything.”

Gray said the advantage is not the tax laws, like some Western Tidewater restaurant owners believe. While the residents fall into a different bracket, they pay taxes like everyone else on the outside world.

The real advantage, Gray said, is The Village.

“The only unfair advantage that we might have is that we have resources,” Gray said. “The good reputation of The Village helped me instantly, and I have this great big building that is in an existing business

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that has already flourished.”

It also gave him the ability to go out and hire the best in Western Tidewater, which he admitted was unique.

“I have five people working for me that are fully capable of running their own restaurants,” Gray said. “You usually have one or two people that work themselves to death in the restaurant business.”

Though he added that even with the allstar staff and what that costs, they are turning a profit in the Back Porch.

“I don’t want to sit back there and lose money,” Gray said. “And luckily we have not lost money since day one.”

The Village also brings him a good boss.

“She has definitely pushed us to be better than we would have been by ourselves,” Gray said of Stewart. “I will tell you that has aggravated me to no end at some points, but then again, it has made us be better than if left to our own devices. Because we are in the trenches, sometimes you will try to find an easier way.

“Having someone who is not going to let us take that easier way, I think, is one of the keys to our success. She has kept us honest.”

It’s also the attitude back there amongst the chefs.

“I hate it when somebody doesn’t like my food,” Johnson said. “But what that really means is you have to search to figure it out, like a puzzle.

“Some of the stuff that is on the menu today didn’t go over well as specials, but after tweaking it four, five, maybe six times, something on them clicked and they became really good.”

“What keeps me in it is that it is still challenging,” Gray agreed. “And the fact that we are winning. I often deem things in terms of a win or a loss. That’s just my mentality.

I want to win every day, and I don’t want to lose.

“When we opened this, I knew that Franklin was a small demographic and that it was going to be a tough win,” Gray continued. “It’s a scenario that few people

in the U.S. have been able to do. It’s kind of like spitting from space and trying to hit the ocean. I think we have hit it.

“But I think it’s been a group effort. The whole team certainly deserves as much credit as Betty and I.” Despite all of it, including the 80 to 100 hour weeks, Gray still loves cooking. He started loving food when he was 5-6 years old.

“The first thing I learned how to cook was an egg. It was a scrambled egg and it was very basic, of course,” Gray said. “The next thing I learned how to cook was a

hamburger on the stovetop.

“And from there, even though I was young, I was experimenting. I would get a hamburger, and then take some cheese, hot dogs and onions and dice them up and basically pocket the hamburger and fill it up.

I called it the pizza hamburger.”

He learned to cook from his mom, Anne Gray.

“She always said she didn’t want me to have to rely on a woman to cook for me, that I ought to know how to do it myself,” he said. “And I like cooking. I think that was one of my interests in getting into the

45

46 western tidewater living

food business.”

When the Como, North Carolina, native graduated from Southampton Academy, however, he went to Virginia Tech and majored in history and political science.

While there it wasn’t all study, as he worked at the Sheratan hotel doing banquets. Then when he graduated, he followed a friend who had completed an internship at Disney World to Orlando, where they worked at the Grand Floridian Resort and Spa. After four years and several promotions, he and his brother bought a restaurant in Richmond, where he started cooking and really learned it. The next step was having children.

“A big factor for me in moving back here was having kids,” Gray said. “Not that there is anything wrong with Richmond, but I like the way I was raised here. It is certainly much different than it was here, but it is still more down-home living than Orlando or Richmond. I feel safe with my kids here.”

Johnson was 3 years old when she learned to cook.

“I lived at my grandmothers house, and

I was involved as soon as I could reach the counter,” she said. “I remember playing in dough on the tables because the bread was made from scratch, and the noodles were made from scratch.

“And then when we went to play outside in the mud — we had spoons and stuff out there and made our own stuff.”

Originally from Northern California, Johnson ended up in Western Tidewater after serving in the military.

“I was one of the first female gate guards down in Oceana,” Johnson said.

After serving, she went into restaurants and went to culinary school at Johnson and Wales University in Norfolk to get a better salary. She was in her 40s.

Johnson ended up in Courtland after getting married to a local. She started working at the Country Club, where she met Gray, and 13 years later, she doesn’t want to be anywhere else.

“It’s a nice place to live,” she said. “I lived in Virginia Beach for 15 years, and I wouldn’t want to go back to the city again.”

With the holiday season upon him, Gray

said it was always special down home.

“We were very traditional for the holidays,” he said. “I am lucky in that my family — it seems like I have a lot of women who can really cook. It was traditional, but it was always really well prepared.

“Beyond the food, what I really remember was just everybody being together.”

As far as the restaurant, Gray said there’s nothing special about them individually.

They are a good group, and they are all overachievers.

“For us, you don’t have to say a word to any of us if we make a mistake because we are really brutal on ourselves,” Gray said.

“And that’s what I really care about. I want you to get it right, but I know that you are not always going to get it right. What I really care about is your intention. Are you trying to do the right things and you just made a mistake? I can deal with that. What I can’t deal with is the guy who doesn’t care whether he got it right or wrong.

“We don’t have that here. We are a bunch of people who truly care. We don’t want to let each other down.”

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Courtland Medical Center Now a part of Southampton Family Practice

J. Michael Ponder, MD • Stacy Brinkley, FNP • Tammy Walters, PA–C. Offering appointments Monday through Friday with late appointments on Tuesdays. Call 757.653.2007 to make an appointment.

J. Michael Ponder, MD

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Tammy Walters, PA–C

Thank you for choosing Southampton Family Practice for your medical care.