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ACCORDING TO SIV, ALL MEN “DRAG”

The Golden Bow

a symbol for breastfeeding protection, promotion and support.

Left: Award winning actor and TV presenter Siv Ngesi. Right: Siv’s popular drag character, Sivanah.

Jehad Kasu

very August in South Africa we celebrate Women’s Month. But what often drowns out what should be a month of heightened celebration of the achievements of women and the advancement of women’s rights, is the grim reality of Gender Based Violence (GBV) making all too familiar headlines. If we keep treating the symptoms of GBV, we will never stop its ugly, inhumane, and threatening presence in society. The conversation around GBV needs to shift to why does this keep happening and what can we men do to stop it – completely! One of the most outspoken men and staunch advocate for women’s rights is award winning Actor and TV Presenter Siv Ngesi. Our publisher caught up with Siv last week to discuss the development of and the motivation for his advocacy of women’s rights. And

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ACCORDING TO SIV, ALL MEN “DRAG”

your friends, it’s not easy to admit that you are part of the problem.

But you can’t just apologise, behaviour needs to change. Sometimes you need to look in the mirror and say, “I am trash and I need to change”.

Speaking out is also not enough. Men need to actively be trying to change. It’s like people who say they aren’t racist, but they don’t act out against it. Like calling out your dad (or family member) at the dinner table when using a racial slur. Hold them immediately accountable.

Speaking out against GBV is helpful, but also a reactionary response. What do you think men who raise boys can do to create a culture/ethos of respect for all women from a very early age?

This is a very important question. Many boys in our society are raised by broken men. It’s so much easier to build a boy into a good man, than it is to x a broken man. Really educating them from a young age about respecting women and gender equality. That the rhetoric of women being weaker must be unlearned (and not propagated).

Young boys learn by example. So the boy

you have an in uence over needs to see you treat all women with respect. What boy will bene t from a man telling him to respect women, but he witnesses this same man beat up his mom, aunt or sister, or some other women. Every man has a responsibility to create incredible young men who treat women better in the future. It starts there.

You have made some very bold and dangerous statements (rants as you call them) on social media in support of women who were victims of GBV - dangerous to the extent that your own safety and security might be compromised, why?

I will never be silent. Every time I learn of an incident of GBV it hurts me. Every time a woman or child gets raped or murdered it hurts me and I take it very personally.

So it angers me and I speak emotionally about it. Yes, my safety and security has de nitely been compromised at times. But our women’s safety and security are compromised every single day of their lives. So, for me, this is a small sacri ce to make. If I should get hurt or killed because of speaking out, I’d consider that an honourable death. I have no time for threats. But if you’re reading this, and you rape or murder women or children, and you have a problem with how I do things – I’m always open and keen to have a conversation in person.

What is the most interesting/coward response you received to one of these social media rants against GBV?

I’ve been threatened by lawyers and by people who threaten to break my knees. But once I respond to those threats, I don’t hear back from them.

I am a lion, and lions don’t care what the sheep says about them. Again, these are threats women receive every single day.

What message would you like to send to the men of South Africa?

Dear men, let us be better. Let us be more. Dear men, let us hold our friends and family accountable to their actions.

Dear brothers, she wasn’t just someone’s mother, child, daughter, or sister. She was SOMEONE.

Men, equality is not a pie. If someone is equal to you, you don’t get less of the pie. Let’s ght for equality and treat women better.

FORMER BANYANA BANYANA CAPTAIN AMANDA DLAMINI TALKS CAREERS AND BUSINESS IN SPORTS AND WELLNESS

https://www.instagram.com/unlocked_za/ https://twitter.com/Nedbank https://www.instagram.com/nedbank/ About Nedbank YouthX

YouthX has three pillars: • YouthX Live, a series of virtual events hosted by changemakers and industry experts with the purpose of giving access to resources and inspiring the youth, and sharing nancial education and insights based on each category. • YouthX Change, an Unlocked.Me website where the youth can read blogs, watch video content, and enter the YouthX awards. • YouthX Summit, a youth festival where the YouthX award winners will be announced.

The awards will be open to entries in July 2021 and aim to o er prize money, mentorship, creative learning experiences, networking opportunities and gadgets to the value of R2,2 million to kickstart the winners’ journeys to becoming future changemakers.

The changemakers are multidisciplinary, award-winning South African designer Rich Mnisi (Fashion and Beauty); activist, business owner, writer and TEDx speaker Candice Chirwa (Social Good and Sustainability); former Banyana Banyana captain Amanda Dlamini (Sports and Wellness); entrepreneur in the technology and innovation space Rivo Mhlari (Technology and Innovation); founder and CEO of Bathu Shoes, Theo Baloyi (Business and Finance); and the multitalented SAMA and BET award-winner Sho Madjozi (Arts and Entertainment). YouthX forms part of the Unlocked.Me platform, a beyond-banking platform that aims to unlock youth potential. Since launching Unlocked.Me in 2019, Nedbank has supported youth with over 600 000 Smart CVs with a professional CV typically costing R200. Some 617 100 users have saved over R123 million using this feature alone.

Through this initiative, Nedbank helped South African youth complete over 180 000 courses, improving their employability, and helped over 73 000 learners with a combination of career guidance, as well as university, bursary and National Student Financial Aid Scheme (NSFAS) applications. Nedbank was also one of the rst companies to sign the CEO Pledge for the Youth Employment Service (YES) initiative.

BURNOUT: WHEN THERE’S NOTHING LEFT TO GIVE

Zagreb Kline Spot the signs early to help prevent more destructive e ects

Burnout can result in even the most dedicated and passionate individuals feeling overwhelmed, helpless and disengaged in their working and private lives, with potentially severe consequences for their mental and physical health, relationships and productivity.

Given the pressures of the current COVID-19 pandemic, much greater awareness of this often-overlooked syndrome is needed to help prevent its destructive progression, warns Dr Dumakazi Mapatwana, a psychiatrist practising at Netcare Akeso Alberton.

“Burnout is a complex reaction to sustained extreme stress. It is not an overnight phenomenon, but rather a gradual process de ned by emotional, physical and mental exhaustion that follows chronic and severe stress, which is most often work-related but may include other kinds of stress, like caring for a sick family member,” she says.

The concept of burnout was developed to describe a multi-faceted syndrome characterised by depersonalisation, emotional exhaustion and a sense of low personal accomplishment that eventually leads to decreased e ectiveness at work.

“Sadly, it is often only when burnout has progressed to the point where it is seriously impacting their lives, that people seek the help they need. Persons experiencing burnout may develop depression or anxiety, and they often misuse alcohol or substances in an attempt to cope with their situation, which they often perceive as hopeless.”

Burnout could contribute to heart disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, obesity, metabolic syndrome, chronic insomnia, high cholesterol and chronic pain, and could make one more vulnerable to illness. “It can also impair job satisfaction and performance, increase absenteeism, and may ultimately lead to dismissal in extreme cases,” Dr Mapatwana adds.

Diaan Bisogno, a clinical psychologist practising at Netcare Akeso Stepping Stones, says that emotional detachment, hopelessness and helplessness are characteristic of burnout. “People with burnout struggle to nd meaning in anything they do, often feel powerless and that nothing they do will make a di erence,” she notes. “We are living in an extremely stressful time, and when there are not enough resources, people get burnt out. We’ve been coping with the pandemic for a long time, and every time people get a little bit of hope that the situation may improve it seems there is some new blow, such as a higher level of lockdown restrictions or a new variant of concern. When you are burnt out, these changes require energy many people just don’t have anymore. The reserves are empty, there is simply nothing left to give,” Bisogno says.

“When you start detaching emotionally, it often numbs relationships with those closest to you. There is no energy left for nurturing other aspects of your life, which further diminishes social support, over and above the physical distancing measures we are practising to prevent contracting and spreading COVID-19.

“It is not uncommon for people facing burnout to turn to drugs or alcohol, or misuse medication, as they struggle to cope. For instance, a person may take cocaine or tik so they can get through 18 hours of work without sleeping, or abuse sleeping pills to counteract insomnia, leading to dependence and addiction that is often linked to depression, anxiety or other mental health conditions,” Bisogno adds.

Burnout in the workplace

“For employers, the consequences of burnout in their team include more absenteeism, reduced productivity, high sta turnover and instability, which only creates more anxiety among the sta members,” Bisogno says.

“For many frontline workers, vicarious or indirect trauma resulting from continuously dealing compassionately with others in distressing situations is an inevitable part of the job. While this occupational hazard can’t be avoided, it can often be managed better through building resilience and spotting and addressing the warning signs early with the help of mental health professionals, so that it does not lead to burnout.”

According to Dr Lerato Motshudi, head of clinical research and programme development at Netcare Akeso, it is possible for individuals to develop skills and techniques to help address these kinds of pressures e ectively before they become overwhelming. strengthens individual awareness of risk and builds resilience for prevention of burnout,” she says.

The programme makes use of evidence-based psycho-emotional tools shown to be e ective in building resilience and grit. The individual is assisted to appreciate their own level of risk of burnout, and this enables them to focus on the areas of greatest personal relevance. Our experience has led to the identi cation of common workplace stressors which are prevalent in a wide range of corporate and working environments.”

Dr Mapatwana

Know the symptoms of burnout

“It is important for all of us to take care of both our mental and physical health, especially in di cult times. We need to be alert to initial signs and red ags, and act on those because if they are ignored and not addressed, burnout can have signi cant consequences, including serious medical conditions,” Dr Mapatwana says.

The symptoms of burnout may be physical, emotional and behavioural, and could comprise the following:

Physical

• Feeling tired and drained most of the time • Changes in sleeping and eating habits • Frequent physical complaints: unexplained headaches, stomach problems or muscle aches • Muscle tension • Frequent illnesses from lowered immunity

Emotional

• Sense of failure and self-doubt • Feeling helpless, trapped, and defeated

• Emotional detachment from others • Feeling alone in the world • Lack of drive or motivation • Increasingly cynical, critical and generally negative outlook • Feeling irritable and impatient with co-workers, customers or clients • Decreased satisfaction and sense of accomplishment

Behavioural

• Poor concentration, making mistakes at work • Withdrawing from responsibilities • Isolating yourself from others • Procrastinating, taking longer to get things done • Using food, drugs, or alcohol to cope • Taking out your frustrations on others • Skipping work, or coming in late and leaving early

For information about mental health issues and services, accessing care, and for professional help in a mental health crisis, Netcare Akeso is here to help. In the event of a psychological crisis, emergency support can be reached on 0861 435 787, 24 hours a day.

Contact Netcare Akeso on info@akeso.co.za; visit www.akeso.co.za; or book psychologist and occupational therapist consultations via www.copetherapy.co.za and psychiatrist consultations through Netcare appointmed ™, online at www.netcareappointmed.co.za or by calling 0861 555 565. The COPE Therapy website www.copetherapy.co.za also contains many useful blog posts on various issues and tips relating to mental health.

IT’S TIME TO OWN YOUR BEAUTIFUL WITH POND’S

Supplied Content

Following in the footsteps of previous winners Nomfundo Mlaba, Nosipho Mhlanga, along with thousands of hopeful entrants, the search for the next Face of POND’S is on, and this time there is more than one winner!

Open to all South African citizens, the ante is being upped in 2021 in the brand’s quest to give back to communities and fans alike. In the history of the competition, only one hopeful entrant was selected as the Face of POND’S. This year, three entrants will be given the chance to represent the number one skincare brand in the world for a year, while using this platform to express and celebrate their authenticity and unique beauty.

Apart from the winners walking away with the sought-after title as Faces of POND’S and prizes to the value of over R50 000 each, the brand wants to ignite a renewed love for selfcare, face care and overall feelings of acceptance and self con dence amongst South Africans.

“After taking a brief hiatus, we are excited to once again search for - and more importantly celebrate - the diverse beauty that is a true re ection of our country,” says Sphelele Mjadu, Senior PR Lead for Africa, Unilever Beauty and Personal Care.

The beauty industry is seen as contributing to the spread of narrow beauty ideals and seven in ten (71%) South Africans think that the industry is pressurising people into thinking they need to look a certain way. As a champion for diversity and inclusion, stretching beyond age, gender, and background, we want to challenge these norms and encourage all South Africans to enter the competition and own their beautiful.”

The competition, which launched on 1 July 2021, ends at midnight on Thursday, 30 September 2021. South Africans who wish to secure their spot in the competition need to purchase any POND’S product, complete an online entry form, submit a hi-res image, and maintain their proof of purchase. All participants are also allowed to enter the competition as many times as they wish, provided that each entry is associated with a separate POND’S till slip and unique barcode.

As part of a thorough selection process conducted by a panel of judges and brand representatives, entries will be cut down to top 50 nalists in the weeks post the competition closing. Following this, the top 20 will be announced, and the public will vote for their favourites via the POND’s South Africa website. The new Faces of POND’S will be announced on Thursday, 25 November 2021. Commenting on her experience, Nomfundo Mlaba (Face of POND’S 2019), shares more about her journey, “The Face of POND’S competition has changed the trajectory of my life. Not only has it provided me with the opportunity to represent the brand, but it has also given me the platform to inspire and reach so many South Africans through social media, expanding my portfolio to collaborate with other brands, and giving hope to young hopefuls from my community, Ezibomvini in Pietermaritzburg.

I am grateful to the brand for supporting me in more ways than I ever imagined possible, and I want to encourage everyone to enter this competition and make their dreams a reality. If a hometown girl from KZN like myself could do it, you too could shoot for the stars!”