Hindu soc celebrates Holi festival Students celebrated Holi, the Hindu Festival of Colours, in Ravelin Park on April 16th. The spring festival, traditionally observed in India, Guyana and Nepal, represents the official beginning of spring. The throwing of paint and powders marks the second day of the festival, called Dhulhendi, and is a ceremony with roots in medicine as the powders are made up of medicinal herbs thought to fight off the causes of viral fever, a common illness at spring time. The festival has been celebrated over the past few years in Ravelin Park with this year’s being the most well attended by those of Hindu and various other faiths. photo: Tom Worman
More Holi photos: upsu.net/galleries
Sheila Hancock installed as Chancellor Sheila Hancock has been installed as the new University of Portsmouth chancellor in a high-profile ceremony at the Portsmouth New Theatre Royal and the Students’ Union. The actor installed a ceremony at the New Theatre Royal attended by her friends and family, university staff and local dignitaries. After the ceremony, Hancock was the guest of honour at a champagne lunch held in The Students’ Union, with the University’s Big Band providing entertainment. Pugwash News was given the chance to speak to the Isle of Wight-born actress, and asked what she planned to do while in position, she said: “One of the things that I’m quite passionate about is that the Arts faculty could be better, and there is that space behind the New Theatre Royal which is crying out for a new
building which ideally would be incorporated with the theatre. “I think one of the main objectives, if I can contribute anything, is to make it known what a good place [Portsmouth] is. At the moment I think people don’t blow their trumpets enough - not enough is being said about how good the university is nationwide.” Ms Hancock, who received an honorary University of Portsmouth degree in 2005 in recognition of her services to drama, added: “I think [the city is] a sensational place. Portsmouth used to be a really dreary hole. I used to tour here with plays in the 50’s ... Portsmouth people aren’t going to like that, but now I think it’s stunning - such a feeling of excitement. You just feel things are beginning to happen and I love being in places where it’s beginning.” Asked whether she feels the Uni-
versity’s comparatively young age makes a difference to her position, the acclaimed actor and author said: “I would not like to have been the chancellor of a university that is very firmly established and bound with tradition. I love the idea that this is a new place that’s constantly changing and constantly growing.” Hancock also cited working with young people as one of the best parts of the job stating that she enjoyed “the contact with young people, I’m lucky I have lots of grandchildren, but they are just tiny. I really lack contact with youths as it were. When I do a play ... there’s always a young member of the company but to be in touch with the futures of young people is very exciting as you get older.” Talking in regards to the negative aspects of the job and what it entails, the chancellor quipped
about the ceremonial outfit the she will be required to wear on formal occasions. “The graduation ceremony is going to be funny: I’m going to get smaller with the weight of the gown, I’ll end up as a little tiny gnome standing on the platform.” The chancellor continued to outline her thoughts on what the hardest parts of doing the job well are: “It’s quite demanding if you are going to do the job properly then you’ve got to try and get to know a lot of people. I’ve got to get my head round things like engineering and cosmology - people start coming up to me and asking about things and I have to look them up on the web, not least rugby! What the hell is that all about? All those people falling about all over the place! So, there’s a lot of things I need to learn; how exciting.”
Health
Politics
The CopyShop
In memoriam
Jacob Leverett & Steph Hall
Mumps advice issued to students The Health Protection Agency, which advises organisations such as the NHS on health matters, has issued a Mumps advisory after noting an increase in the virus in the Hampshire area, and among students. The virus can affect adults of any age and students are advised to read the information they have published, available on page 2 of this issue. Further information is available from Health Protection Agency: hpa.org.uk University’s Mumps advice page: tinyurl.com/5h9naw
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Inside...
Pugwash Elections Think you could head up the design team or edit the sports news? Pugwash Elections coming soon!
Reviews To break up the monotony of the dissertation season, we bring you a four page bumper colour reviews issue!
Features An Englishman (still) in Spain, Nordic Walking, from halls to a house, and forgotten history
Purple Weds AU Dinner speaker announced, more banter, Dodgeball update, American Football, and more!
Got back issues? Download back-issues of Pugwash News: www.pugwashmag.com
Read the full interview: upsu.net/news
UPSU Media
Want to write for Andrew Harvey University ties Pugwash News? beatings, now available use of The Union’s Copy- The funeral of History student Pugwash News & Purple Wedneselectric Shop is now stocking Andrew Harvey who died recently days is the Union’s student newsofficial University ties will take place on Friday 25th April paper. If you have something to shock for £10, adding to at 12pm in St. Peter’s Church, Mill shout about, from burning issues batons, its extensive range End, Rickmansworth, Hertfordshire. to match reports, comment to feao f U n i v e r s i t y o f Friends and colleagues attending tures, or you want to photograph, submersion in Portsmouth hooded the funeral are most welcome to design or help lay up, get in touch! pits of tops, t-shirts, and join the family after the service at sewage... scarves. The Copy- a reception, details of which will be More info: upsu.net/p/2166
As the Olympics approach, Matt Blackall reports on allegations of China’s Human Rights abuses in Tibet page 4
Shop will also be stocking University cufflinks, if you prefer your support to be a little more understated.
upsu.net/copyshop
provided at the funeral. For anyone who is unable to attend, the University Chaplains in the Nuffield Centre invite students to contact them to arrange a commemorative event to take place later in the term. Please contact 023 9284 3030
or chaplains@port.ac.uk
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Pugwash News Wednesday 23rd April 2008
News
Inbox
HPA issues Mumps advisory The Health Protection Agency, which advises organisations such as the NHS on health matters, has issued a Mumps advisory after noting an increase in the virus in the Hampshire area, and among students. The agency today issued the following statement: “General increase in mumps in South-East Hampshire: The [Health Protection Unit] has observed an increase in mumps in South-East Hampshire since the beginning of the year. Mumps is an acute viral illness transmitted by direct contact with saliva or droplets from the saliva of an infected person. Humans are the only known host of the mumps virus. The incubation period is 14-21 days and mumps is transmissible from several days before the parotid/neck swelling to several days after it appears. Symptoms begin with a headache and fever for a day or two before the onset of classic swelling of the parotid glands in the neck: the swelling may be unilateral (one side) or bilateral (both sides). Some cases may have no parotid gland/neck swelling but may develop symptoms elsewhere. Other symptoms ... include swelling of the ovaries (oophoritis), swelling of the testes (orchitis), aseptic meningitis and deafness. Despite common belief there is no firm evidence that orchitis causes sterility. Mumps was the
commonest cause of viral meningitis in children prior to 1988, when vaccine was introduced. Contagiousness is similar to that of influenza and rubella, but not as infectious as chickenpox or measles. Exposed individuals should be considered infectious from 12 to 25 days after exposure. Prevention: Mumps vaccine is one of the components of MMR vaccine. MMR is given in the national immunisation programme at 12-15 months and at 4 years of age. There is no upper age limit [so people of all ages may have the vaccine] ... two doses are required, and can be given separated by at least a one month interval. Individuals who were born between 1980 and 1990 may not be protected against mumps but are likely to be vaccinated against measles and rubella. They may have never received a mumps-containing vaccine or had only one dose of MMR and may not have been exposed to natural mumps. They can book in to see their GP and request MMR vaccine. If this is their first dose, a further dose of MMR should be given from one month later.” Further information is available from Health Protection Agency: hpa.org.uk University’s Mumps advice page: tinyurl.com/5h9naw
Union Roundup
RAG Week 2008 RAG Week starts on the 28th April, the aim of the week is to raise as much money for charity. Whislt at the same time having a bit of laugh. All the money raised throughout the year by RAG goes to the three nominated charitites, The Rowans Hospice, Macmillan Cancer Support and The National
Association for Colitis and Crohn’s Disease (NACC). This year’s events include: Monday: RAG’s Get Spotted and RAG Blag / Tuesday: RAG Raids across campus / Wednesday: The RAG Jail at Purple Wednesday / Thursday: Quiz for RAG in the
Waterhole / Friday: RAG @ Societies Carnival and Cake Stall. There’s many ways for people to get involved. If you have any donations, or want to help sell some of our treats, please get in touch: rag@uoint.org. It’s going to be a great week, so look out for flyers for more details.
RAG Sky Dive
Volunteering in Portsmouth
The RAG team are providing students with a taste of adventure by organising the first ever RAG skydive. The event, which hopes to raise thousands of pounds for charities including Rowans hospice and McMillan Cancer research, will be taking place 26th and 27th of April, in Salisbury. The event is being co-managed by the Sky diving club.
VIP are looking to continue their award winning successes this year by hosting two events on a superweekend of volunteering! The 10th May will witness the transformation of the Union into a Pirates galleon for our annual Pirates Day, a day of arts and crafts for disabled children, organised in partnership with Enable Ability. The 11th will witness our final OAP lunch of the year.
Pugwash news & Purple Wednesdays
Time Wasting
“Small Print” and back issues
Contact Us
Editorial Team
Contributors
Produced fortnightly by the University of Portsmouth Students’ Union (UPSU). Printed by Quotemeprint - www. quotemeprint.com, 0845 130 0667, and now printed on 100% recycled paper. Pugwash News & Purple Wednesdays bears no allegiance to any political party and discriminates against no-one.
To get in touch with the Pugwash News & Purple Wednesdays team, please visit upsu.net/newsdesk, email us at newsdesk@upsu.net, call us via the Union’s Media & Publications Officer at 023 9284 3657, or visit us at The Student Centre, Portsmouth Students’ Union, Cambridge Road, Portsmouth, Hampshire, PO1 2EF.
Editors
Catherine Bird, Dave Broers, Laura Callan, Ben Endley, Amanda Greenwood, Joel Growney, Luke Hall, Alex Harries, Chris Hewett, William Hobson, Ben Norman, Simon O’Connor, Isobel Rigg, Tim Meo, Steve Topazio, Chris Walsh, Tom West. ZZ Top, Paul MCartney & Michael Jackson, Weird Al Yankovic, Cyndi Lauper, Pink Floyd, The Pretenders, Billy Joel, Billy Idol, Elton John, Neil Young, Sheena Easton, Patty Smith & Scandal, Fashion, Big Country, Morris Day & The Sign, John Lennon, Wham, Randy Jackson, Adam Ant, Bananarama (with apologies to Mylo).
You can download back issues of Pugwash magazine and Pugwash News online at: www.pugwashmag.com
Errors & omissions: while we take every care to verify our content, we may occasionally make mistakes. Please contact us using the details above to report any inaccuracies or mistakes.
Editor: Laura Patricia News Editor: Jacob Leverett Design Editor: Tom Worman Features Editor: Steph Hall Sports Editors: Peppa Barnett & Marisa May Reviews Editor: Tallie Kane Web Editor: Luke Simmonds Sub Editors
Design: Peter Allsop, Andy Donohoe & Kev Wilkins Features: Matt Blackall
Not sudoku...
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Pugwash News Wednesday 23rd April 2008
News
Fortnight’s Politics
Six awards for students’ union at Best Bar None 2008
Ben Norman
Alex Harries
Fears of Violence in Zimbabwe Morgan Tsvangirai, the candidate from the Zimbabwean Democratic Movement for Change, has called for the President of South Africa to stand down from his role of election observer after weeks of growing tensions as the electoral commission fails to reveal the result of the Presidential election. Tsvangirai’s comments come amid fears that Mugabe Loyalists in the police and military are beginning to crack down on the opposition movement, fears compounded by a Chinese shipment of arms which has docked in South Africa enroute to Zimbabwe.
UPEL, the company which runs bars and entertainments in the Union’s Student Centre, has won six awards in the 2008 Best Bar None awards, with first place in the Power FM Listeners’ Choice and five runners-up prizes. The Power FM Listeners’ Choice award is one of the hardest awards to win, with competition from 45 other venues across the city.
UPEL has also won accreditation for the Student Centre as a Best Bar None-participant bar, venue and leisure complex, as part of its six awards, receiving more awards than any other venue in Portsmouth. The awards ceremony took place on Wednesday night, and the event was attended by staff from the Student Centre’s trading company, UPEL. The Student Centre is one of
the largest entertainments venues on the south coast, as well as being the home of the University of Portsmouth’s Students’ Union. The building won Portsmouth’s “Best New Building” award when it was opened in 2002. The Best Bar None awards are a prestigious recognition of the quality of a venue. Sponsors include the Hampshire police service, Power FM, the NUS, and a number of venue operators in the area.
too intensely at a woman travelling on the same train as him. His lawyer says he will appeal the sentence.
According to the Cal2 gary Herald household cats purr at frequen-
cies in the range of 25 to 50 Hertz whereas wild cats can purr at frequencies up to 150 Hertz.
Teachers Vote for Strike Action On May 24th teachers across the country will down their marking pens and pick up placards, as the NUT voted for nationwide strike action over pay. The strike has been called to stand against government plans to increase teachers pay under the rate of inflation, which would result in a pay cut. Hundreds of student teachers are expected to join picket lines across the country, including Portsmouth.
Italian man has 1jail Anreceived a suspended sentence for staring
A stunt driver work3 ing on the latest James Bond film; Quanphoto: Tom Worman
Fairtrade, fair dance access, and fair prayer space
Carter Visits Hamas
Steve Topazio, Union Council Chair
Ex-President Jimmy Carter has begun his tour of the Middle East, a tour on which he aims to raise awareness of the humanitarian crisis in Gaza. On Thursday Carter met with member of the Hamas leadership in Cairo and on Friday he met with exiled Hamas leader Khaled Meshaal in Syria. Hamas are regarded a “terrorist” group by Israel, the United States and the European Union despite being democratically elected by the Palestinian people in 2006. Carter’s visit coincides with recent Israeli raids into the Gaza strip, leaving hundreds dead or wounded, including Reuters Camera man Fadl Shanaa who was killed on the 16th April by Israel tank fire.
April saw the return of Union Council after a break of two months, due to Sabbatical Elections and Easter holidays in March and April. The meeting commenced with some updates on ongoing actions points for the Sabb officers. It was confirmed by Elle Gray that the Sabbatical team had not been submitting their weekly hours to her by Friday, however Rena Ellis confirmed that officers would now be electronically submitting hours onto a time card and that a report of each Sabb’s hours will be made available at Union Council each month. Most officers had very little to report, however Elle gave an account of the happenings of the NUS conference, where the controversial NUS
governance review failed to pass. Elle told the council that, despite the NUS no longer directly opposing top up fees but instead fighting the lifting of cap, UPSU would still be campaigning for free education for all. Elle also congratulated those who had been elected to fill the Sabb roles next year and praised the media team for “excellent work”. As far as committee updates were concerned RAG, Societies and VIP had the most to report, with RAG week commencing the 28th April. The main events taking place are RAG Jail and a RAG slave auction on 30th April. If you are interested in being a slave or nominating someone to be a slave please contact steven.
a hugely popular event and everyone is welcome. And finally VIP have the last two volunteering events on the 10th and 11th May. Three motions were also passed at this months meeting which can be viewed in full at www.upsu.net/ democracy . In short, the Union will now be mandated to lobby the university to allow equal access and prices to any dance societies that is offered to the Dance Club. The Union is now also mandated to source all its hoodies from Fairtrade and ethical companies and a motion was also passed to ensure that the Union will continue to lobby the university for a multi faith prayer space after 5pm.
topazio@hotmail.co.uk
More information: upsu.net/democracy or pop into the Sabb office
Societies have the annual societies carnival on Friday 2nd May, which is
tum of Solace; has crashed an iconic Aston Martin into Italy’s Lake Garda. The film is being filmed at Pinewood studios in England as well as Panama, Chile and Mexico.
Russian media are reporting that a 4 drunk man woke up to find a six inch knife lodged in his back. Yuri Lyalin, 53, was rushed to hospital where no damage to vital organs was discovered.
Recent bad smells 5 across the south of England have been blamed
on agricultural techniques used in Northern France, showing smells can cross the Channel.
Politics
Environment
Labour students hold political debate at University
Climate Change Attacks Lapland
Ben Norman
The chill of a Thursday evening was off-set by a heated debate between local politicians from across the party spectrum in a Question Time style debate in Park, The panel consisted of Councillor Gerald VernonJackson, The Lib Dem leader of Portsmouth City Council; alongside Labour MP for Portsmouth North Sarah McCarthy-Fry; UKIP member Steve Harris; Respect candidate John Molyneux; Tim Dawes of the Green Party; and Nick Chaffey Socialist Party regional coordinator. When discussing the role of lo-
cal government in climate change, both incumbent politicians focused on initiatives taken on a local level; at one point Vernon-Jackson alluded to plans for a tram system in the city. Harris controversially denied the existence of climate change, denouncing environmentalism as “a new religion.” Chaffey questioned the privatisation polices of local services, which places climate change in the hands of the free market. Steve Harris of UKIP lived up to his political stereotype by denouncing immigration as Jacob resources, Leverett a drain onPhoto: the national
claiming that the freedom of movement inside the European Union was the main cause of the problem. In strong contrast Molyneux, whose party calls for completely open borders with no restrictions on immigration, argued that the economic arguments for and against immigration were irrelevant compared to the cultural and human values. Surely, Molyneux argued, if a school child can speak or understand 21 languages “this is a magnificent thing.” This is an except from Ben’s blog at: upsu.net/blogs/ben_norman
Matt Blackall
Up in Lapland, bordering on the Arctic circle, near to Santa’s Official Village, there is a Husky farm where the staff currently breed and raise around 200 of this type of dogs. Whilst on this farm, I began talking with one of the dog trainers about what he thought about living in Lapland under such inhospitable conditions. All of a sudden the trainer changed the topic and started talking about the weather, normally considered a British trait, but this time carried out by some-
one from Finland. For the trainer, it had been the warmest winter he has ever experienced, and judging by the size and colour of his beard, it is safe to say he has experienced a few. Normally snow fall would reach around one meter, however this year they had around half of this. Also, ice on lakes that normally would be around 70 centimeters thick, was around 35 centimeters good for ice fishing, but completely unusual. Just something for you to think about. Find out more about climate change: bbc.co.uk/climate
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Pugwash News Wednesday 23rd April 2008
Features
Meet the University Can Olympic spirit survive China’s Human Rights record? Chaplaincy Matt Blackall
In recent months the international community has been gripped with indecision over whether or not we should boycott the Olympic games in Beijing this summer. Should our politicians go? Should athletes pull out? Should we watch it on TV? Is trying to extinguish the Olympic flame justifiable? Before attempting to answer these questions, it is important to consider why there is such a demand for a boycott of the 2008 Olympics. The main greivances are Tibet, the ‘Roof of the World’, and China’s Human Rights violations. It was in 1950 when the People’s Republic of China invaded Tibet. Since this time, “Free Tibet” placards have joined the symbolic tools found in the campaigners box, alongside the Peace Badge and a copy of Marx. However to better understand the Tibetan issue, you need to understand how the Chinese government regularly flout the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. Political Prisoners in China, especially those opposed to China’s control of Tibet, are those most likely to be exposed to torture, according to the Free Tibet Campaign (FTC). The FTC website
says, “political prisoners are more vulnerable as they are specifically classified, isolated and targeted by the prisons’ authorities.” For a more official insight, Dr Manfred Nowak, UN Special Rapporteur on Torture, notes how “beatings, use of electric shock batons, submersion in pits of sewage, exposure to conditions of extreme heat or cold, deprivation of sleep, food or water, prolonged solitary confinement, denial of medical treatment and hard labour” are widely used within Chinese prisons. Nowak continued, stating how “the situation in Tibet is aggravated by discriminatory treatment of Tibetans and the targeting of political prisoners.” Furthermore, the FTC notes how Nowak was “particularly concerned with sanctions placed on Tibetan monks, including prohibition on prayers and religious worship.” Photo: Jacob Leverett Just from this we can list the number of Human Right articles that appear to have been broken: Articles 1 - 3, 5, 7, 9, 10, 15, and 18 - 21 (out of 30 in total). Campaigners also point to the attack on freedoms of speech through the arrests and censorship of journalists, the ban on foreign journalists in some Tibetan areas and also, the censorship of the internet, including China and Google’s deal to ban search results that could be
politically damaging to the Chinese government. Now compare this with the Olympic Charter, which Wikipedia defines as “a set of rules and guidelines for the organization of the Olympic Games and for governing the Olympic Movement”, and it says “throughout the history of the Olympics, the Olympic Charter has often decided the outcome of Olympic controversy.” Three of the six Fundamental Principles are broken: “Olympism seeks to create a way of life based on the joy of effort, the educational value of good example and respect for universal fundamental ethical principles.” “Any form of discrimination with regard to a country or a person on grounds of race, religion, politics, gender or otherwise is incompatible with belonging to the Olympic Movement.” “Belonging to the Olympic Movement requires compliance with the Olympic Charter and recognition by the IOC” Therefore the awarding of the Olympics to Beijing not only mocks the Universal Declaration of Human Rights but also, the Olympic Charter and Olympic tradition.
William Hobson
The University offers a wide range of support services for the staff and students, including one of the oldest institutions in higher education; The Chaplaincy. The three members of the chaplaincy offer a place for students in need to turn to, as well as hosting regular events for people to take part in. I talked to Jordan James, who explained what the Chaplaincy can do for you. Jordan is one third of the chaplaincy. She’s from a Roman Catholic background, qualified in both Theology and European Cultural Studies, and works alongside a member of the Anglican church – Peter Jones, and also Bill Matthews who - presents the free churches. Now you might need some of that explaining to you, and luckily that’s exactly one of the things the chaplaincy is set up to do. They offer any student the chance to learn more about other faiths and can help out in very particular ways. For example, helping newcomers to find places of worship in Portsmouth or, answering a few questions about spirituality from a different perspective. One of the things I learnt from our brief For more: encounter was just what the free upsu.net/blogs/mattblackall churches were; a group of churches not under the CofE or Catholic church, but united in resources and intent – from the Salvation Army to the Methodist church. The Chaplaincy itself works a little like the free churches group; broadly speaking they offer personal support to the individual, tailored to the individual. Though the position is traditionally Christian within the UK, they can offer uniquely spiritual and personal support to anyone who seeks it. Jordan is very definite that people from any level or school of faith are welcome to come to them for help, advice or information, and the nature of that help will depend entirely on what they need. So, whilst Photos: Alex Harries Jacob Leverett photo: avi4now at flickr.com of course the &Chaplaincy is perfect
for helping anyone out with a crisis of faith or who’s specifically interested in theology, they’re also there for more general help – if you feel depressed, lonely or stressed out, they’re there to help you. You can find them in the Oasis Suite on the ground floor of the Nuffield centre, and invite anyone to pop over for a coffee and a chat or more serious discussion from 9am to 5pm Monday to Thursday.
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any level or school of faith are welcome to come to them for help
They also offer anyone the opportunity to take part in regular discussion groups throughout the year. One of their main events is the aptly named ‘Monday main event’, held on the first Monday of each month, which offer presentations by lecturers and other members of staff on a subject of their choice, followed by a brief discussion. The presentations are aimed at offering a general audience an insight or perspective on to a variety of subjects, and give people the chance to discuss the topic with others in a relaxed atmosphere. ‘Kaleidoscope’ is also on offer every Thursday, from 12.30pm to 1.30pm, and is similar but offers light refreshments and the opportunity for students to get involved in making their own presentations on a topic they care about and want to discuss. It’s Jordan’s first year as a chaplain at Portsmouth, and she’s impressed with the turnout and enthusiasm students have shown in what the chaplaincy offers. At the next Kaleidoscope, she’ll be doing a brief presentation on ‘The good, the bad and the ugly’ – looking at theological aesthetics throughout our culture, and invites anyone interested to come down to the Oasis Suite on Thursday for a look.
Comment
Wes Streeting: Winning a Fairer Funding System The incoming NUS president writes an open letter to all Students in England on NUS funding campaign plans Wes Streeting, NUS President-elect
I am extremely proud to have been elected to represent students as the new President of NUS. But I am under no illusions as to the enormity of the task that lies ahead. In just a few months, we will have a huge fight on our hands: to rescue our higher education system from being corrupted by market forces, and
to prevent a future where the most esteemed universities are only accessible to the very rich. Next year’s review of higher education funding will be our first chance since 2004 to fight the immoral and unsustainable top-up fees system, and we must be prepared for the battle that lies ahead. In this article, I want to set out what I think will be the direction for NUS on funding issues in the next year or so, and to clarify some important points that have been misrepresented in the press about the new policy of the National Union in this area. First of all, I would like to point out that we still believe that higher
education should be free for students. It isn’t ludicrous, it isn’t offensive and it isn’t selfish. But, sadly, for students in England it isn’t realistic, or credible, and it doesn’t have any chance of being endorsed by any British government under Gordon Brown or David Cameron. It’s painful to say it, especially for someone who was there on the night in 2004 when we got to within five votes of stopping top-up fees, but the only way to get a good deal for students in this forthcoming review is to accept the notion of a contribution to the costs of higher education, made after graduation, while making clear that the prin-
ciple behind this still stinks. We need to bear in mind that when students pay less, the income of the sector falls. On the one hand, it clearly isn’t in the interests of students for money to be taken out of their pockets, whether before or after graduation. But on the other hand, it also isn’t in the interests of students to be educated in an under funded system, by under paid teachers, and with second-rate facilities and learning resources. This is essentially the dilemma that NUS, and student officers around the country, have been wrestling with over the last few months, culminating in an
historic change of policy endorsed by our Annual Conference on April 2. Delegates at our conference voted to stop simply arguing for “free education” in England, and decided instead to consult with our members and bring to the table some radical, imaginative solutions that will be better and fairer for students than regressive and damaging market forces. Read the full letter at: upsu.net/news Have your say: comment@upsu.net Comments are the author’s opinion and are not endorsed by the Union or Pugwash News
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Pugwash News Wednesday 23rd April 2008
Features
Find golden laces to win Bestival tickets Keep an eye out on campus over the next fortnight for the legs, and if you see them, grab them! Small print: the winner will need to provide us with their name and address so we can post the tickets to them. No cash alternative is available. Sorry, but this competition is not open to employees of the students’ union. For full competition details, please contact: The Media & Publications Officer, Sabb Office, UPSU, Cambridge Road, Portsmouth, PO1 2EF
photo: graham_tait on flickr
photo: Jacob Leverett
Find the golden laces and win a pair of Bestival tix! Kickers have offered us one pair of Bestival tickets - worth up to ¬£270 - to give away to the one lucky student who tracks down the pair of Kickers cardboard “legs” with golden shoelaces on. Over the next two weeks, we will be hiding the legs somewhere on campus. The first person to find them simply needs to rush them back to the Union’s Sabb Office to win the tickets. It’s as simple as that!
Sabb Corner
the Union » JobShop
Ben Norman
JobShop jobs of the week
Student Activities & Development Officer
This week Richard Butler, a photojournalist with CBS, was rescued by the Iraqi army after being abducted from the Qasr-al Sultan hotel in Basra on February 10th. Butler was one of the only freelance photographers in Baghdad when American tanks entered the city following the devastating shock and awe bombardment. Whilst Richard’s release is cause for celebration, the overall picture remains bleak. Iraq is currently ranked 157 on the Reporters Without Borders press freedom
index, as more than 200 journalists and media assistants have been killed since the US led invasion of 2003. Iceland comes top of the index whilst Eritrea, Iran, Turkmenistan and North Korea continue to languish at the end of the list due to their deplorable human rights records. Reporting the news from the ground remains a dangerous way to earn a crust; already this year seven journalists have been killed whilst 129 have been imprisoned. These men and women are not your regular tabloid hacks; they are not the gutter snipe journos who
pontificate from the safety of their office. They are standing on the frontlines, standing alongside the suffering and the dying in order to be a witness to history. We live in a world of mass media spin where propaganda is too often being mistaken for news, so as Robert Fisk says, a true journalists role is “to try and get as near as we can to the truth and get the truth out.” So next time you’re reading the paper or watching the news over breakfast, remember those that put their lives on the line to get that truth out.
If you’re one of the 60% of all students in the UK looking for part-time work to help you balance the books while you study, the UPSU JobShop can help. We offer a wide range of employment opportunities to fit around your studies. Copyshop Assistants in Union upsu.net/jobshop/jobs/J0000272 Administration Assistants in Union upsu.net/jobshop/jobs/J0000271 Deck Hands in Portsmouth upsu.net/jobshop/jobs/J0000278 Production Operatives in Segens-
worth East Fareham upsu.net/jobshop/jobs/J0000277 Summer Hotel Vacancies upsu.net/jobshop/jobs/J0000276 SUP4L - Money Doctors: Are you a Final Year Student? 1 hour workshop on Friday 25th April about all the important information you’ll need to be aware for when you leave university Student Tax Advice: whatever your job... Don’t be confused by tax! For further information visit: www.studenttaxadvice.org.uk For hundreds more jobs, visit: upsu.net/jobshop
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Pugwash News Wednesday 23rd April 2008
Features
Giving a voice to the silence Tallie Kane
Throughout history, throughout the wars and conflicts, bombings and separatism, there has always been another present in the literary world, the untold story that does not claim a voice for their experiences. I’m not talking about the unmentioned soldiers of a victorious army, shot down in their prime before their country claimed victory - not Wilfred Owen’s men, not Hardy’s Drummer Boy in unmarked graves. I’m talking about the ‘Enemy’ of our battles, and the countries, communities and people who were dragged through it and silenced because they felt they had no right to speak. Imagine Post-War Germany, a country ravaged by the tyranny of Hitler’s dictatorship, and the attitudes the outside world placed on the people who had dealt with the tragedies that came with his regime. The civilians of the country were viewed purely as the enemy, not one of ‘us’, that should be personally ashamed of the crimes that their government committed. This nation of people witnessed a severe change within their homeland, with their national identity destroyed alongside a history of great crimes that are rarely known
or thought about in the public conscience. Mothers could not cry for their sons, or wives for their husbands. This is where the the writers slip in, through the cracks in the literary wasteland to unbutton the history that was so sordidly kept under wraps. Authors from countries that suffered the brunt of the world’s anger have found the voice of a nation’s experience by creating works that tell the rest of the world, and even the rest of their country about what happened to them. Günter Grass’ novel Crabwalk explores the effect that the sinking of the Willhem Gustloff, a ship that transported over 9,000 refugees and crew fleeing from the Red Army, had on three generations of one family. The ship is by far one of the largest losses of life in a single sinking at sea, and rarely heard of. If you were to ask the question to anyone in modern society, their answer would be the Titanic, in which 1,517 people lost their lives, but this is nothing in comparison to the 9,400 lost on the Gustloff. So why do people refrain from telling this story, yet there are reams of novels and film accounts dedicated to preserving the memory of the Titanic? The axis after the Second World War were left by the wayside, their individual stories of heroism and
suffering hidden by their notorious national histories. Italy and Japan, as well as Germany, all suffered a dry patch in regards to the literature and poetry of the period that served as a voice of truth, not as a purpose to rebuild the status of their crumbling country, not odes, but elegies. It was only until the late 50s that writers like Italo Calvino, Nobuo Kojima, Osamu Dazai and Peter Weiss shaped perceptions and society through literature after the departure of international war from their countries, telling of those who were previously denied a voice. As the Carnegie shortlist is revealed, an emphasis on the discovery of personal and political history echoes throughout the choices for the prestigious children’s book award. Can we tell children of the untold histories of the people that they had previously rendered in their brain as the enemy? Will there be stories of the child who wept as he learns of the death of his brother, a foot-soldier in the notoriously savage SS during Nazi occupation? Will it always remain a subject that is overlooked due to the sensitive nature of their position in relations to their past, will the writers of our generation fear the reception if they write from behind enemy lines?
photo: e.v.r.i.e.l @ flickr.com
Home Sweet Home!A i
photo: yeimaya at flickr.com Chris ‘Chewit’ Hewett
As the 07/08 academic year begins to draw to a close, many of this year’s freshers will have chosen their house mates and found themselves accommodation for next year. With this in mind I felt that it would be good to share with you some of the experiences I have had whilst living in a shared house in my second year, along with some advice for the change from halls to house. For me, living in a house with four other lads (and the change from en suite luxury to sharing a glorified cesspit) has provided lots of strange experiences. I’ve never seen toilet roll as a currency but with the gold covered status it receives in my house, it may as well be accepted as legal tender. My advice to you Freshers out there is, always carry a pocket pack of two-ply with you in case of emergencies. No one wants to be jumping straight in the shower purely because of a lack of toilet roll as some of my housemates have done this year! Not to mention the torn up newspapers I’ve found on the bathroom floor, evidence of a desperate attempt to salvage some dignity in the heat of a hungover moment. The kitchen this year has also been a hub of both arguments and hilarity. Kitchens in houses will often be smaller than those in halls and in our case, it’s like cooking for five in a telephone booth. With cleanliness not on top of the agenda in a house of five lads, over the year we’ve grown enough mould
to fill a small cheese factory in Yorkshire, not to mention attracted enough wildlife to open up Southsea’s very first wild nature reserve. This brings me on to my next pointer. No matter how many people you think you are living with, you need to double it in order to get the real number of residents. There are more mice in my house than people and it’s no different in many of the houses through Southsea. The irony of putting down humane traps and filling them with poison appears to have been lost on a lot of my mates, as this has been their preferred method to catch the little rodents. That said, anyone who’s chosen the poison without the traps has had to bear the grim discovery of our furry friends in some unwelcome places. Some of the worst have been under fridges, microwaves and even beds, so perhaps its better to live in harmony with them than wage a war you cannot win! As a final piece of advice, I recommend you choose your house mates carefully if you haven’t already. I don’t know of one house that hasn’t had a major fall out with one of its residents so make sure you don’t fall into the trap and make sure your living with people you get on with! Despite this, sharing a house with your mates cannot be beaten. I can’t imagine another time in my life when I’ll wake up to find a whole sandwich sitting in the toilet, the result of my house mate trying to eat and pee at the same time! Some of the best times you’ll have will be made in the next year so make the most of it.
Comment
Praise indeed, from SLAS to SSHLS Tom West
At the end of this month, the School of Languages and Area Studies (SLAS) loses one of its key staff members, and a person whom I have come to consider possibly the most helpful member of staff ever to have been employed by the University of Portsmouth. Louisa Caine, the current Senior Course Administrator based in Park building, has been looking after a great deal of the SLAS students for the past few years, especially those of us on our year abroad. It is no doubt thanks to her
amazing organisational, administrative and interpersonal skills that we are all able to do what we need to do when we need to do it and have thereby avoided being institutionalised/imprisoned/extradited/ lost whilst in a foreign country. She has received what I believe to be a long overdue promotion, to the lofty position of School Manager in the School of Social, Historical and Literary Studies and with effect from the 30th April, she will be based in Mildam building. If there are any students or staff members working within Mildam reading this, then I would like
you to know you are soon to be amongst the most fortunate of people; with Louisa at the helm, your ship is bound to run as smoothly as if it were being carried in the arms of the gods (not that we’re gushing, but she is actually that good). I would also like to rally together all the students and staff based at Park building in saying ‘Thank you! Thank you! And Thank you!’ to Louisa for everything she’s ever done for us. You are leaving behind a great deal of both students and colleagues who greatly appreciate the hard work and dedication you have shown; the place will not be
the same without you. Katherine Ross, who currently looks after the incoming exchange students within School of Languages Area Studies, has been fully briefed on the insanity she can expect from her new charges and will be taking over from Louisa. We are confident that she will take to her new responsibilities like a duck to water and make us proud to have her as part of the team. For information and to gush your own praises check out this Facebook group: photo: Jacob Leverett tinyurl.com/4xg69t
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Pugwash News Wednesday 23rd April 2008
Features
UPSU Editorial Elections 2008-2009
An Englishman in Spain
Think you could do better ?
Tom West
I’ve never been a great fan of Mondays, in fact I’ve often campaigned to have them removed from the calendar and replaced with, well, anything that’s not a Monday. Anyway, mine here in Granada have turned to rat poo ever since I opted to study French to Spanish Translation, which I have first thing on Mondays. Now, I knew these classes wouldn’t be as much fun as, say, being whipped, but I never thought I’d find myself frantically licking my computer keyboard every time the lecturer turns her back in hope of electrocuting myself just enough in order to be able to leave a little early. That, and the hospital food would take care of my food bill for a couple of days... Having realised that I will most definitely run out of money whilst I’m here and not really wanting to turn to prostitution (I’ve never been a fan of working nights), I’ve been investigating the perhaps more realistic options available to me: fuck all. Trying to find legal part-time employment in this country has become for me what the search for WMD in Iraq was for the US. It’s not due to a lack of positions available; I’ve seen quite a few offered. It’s the fact that Spanish employers appear to still be allowed to discriminate with regards to sex and age.
“
I will most definitely run out of money whilst I’m here ... not really wanting to turn to prostitution (I’ve never been a fan of working nights)
Signs in shop windows advertise positions available to female applicants only, or to applicants aged thirty-five and over, or to female applicants aged sixteen to name but three. One day, curiosity will get the better of me and I’ll actually pop into one of these shops and ask the person behind the counter whether or not it’s illegal in Spain to discriminate in this way and if so, why they do, but I feel I won’t get a straight answer...
“
trying to pull up an attractive Spanish girl’s miniskirt in the middle of the dance floor
Anyway, whilst I wait for some amazing monetary luck to come my way (come on EuroMillions), I’m getting on with real life as much as I can, which includes supporting your friends in their new ventures. This is how I came to be present the night my friend Katie spun the wheels of steel at one of the many Irish pubs here in Granada. A brilliant night was had by all – apparently. I managed to get so completely and utterly drunk that my memories of the evening’s events are hazy to say the least. Listen to Auntie Tom, kids, when you’re told that wine, however useful it may be in getting you through dissertation research, is indeed the Devil’s urine and its consumption in vast quantities will not lead to the annihilation of all your problems, but to the annihilation of your brain the day after the night before. That and you’ll find out you spent the whole night trying to pull up an attractive Spanish girl’s miniskirt in the middle of the dance floor whilst simultaneously dancing to Girls Aloud, Wham! and Sister Sledge. It’s lucky I don’t have any shame, isn’t it?!
• Could you see yourself writing, designing or editing for Pugwash News, Purple Wednesdays, Pugwash Magazine and UPSU.net? • Do you want to develop skills that will help set you up for a career in the media? • Would you like to see your work published to over 20,000 students and many more worldwide? We are looking for the new 2008/2009 UPSU media editorial teams to help put together our award winning publications and you could be the innovative, forward-thinking person we need! Positions Available: • Magazine Editor • Magazine Design Editor • Newspaper Editor • Newspaper Design Editor • Web Editor • • • • •
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• Copy Editor • Marketing and Distribution Manager
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Life and Style » Health
A student from Portsmouth is offering all staff and students the opportunity to take part in Nordic Walking, a new and novel form of exercise from Finland. It’s a low impact workout inspired by Olympic skiers that’s immensely popular in Europe and just catching on in the UK. Over 10 million people worldwide and 15% of the entire population of Finland are regular Nordic walkers, so there could be something to it. Hattie, a first year Law and Accounting student was introduced to the exercise
Pugwash News & Purple Wednesdays is the Union’s new fortnightly newspaper, covering news, sport, reviews, comment and features. Both publications are written, created and produced by the students of the University of Portsmouth, and every student is not only welcome to get involved - it’s every student’s duty to have their say on the matters that affect them the most during their time at University! All positions will receive full training from our staff and the media officer will always be on hand to help you develop. The experience and benefit volunteering for UPSU media is phenomenal and so rewarding, what’s stopping you from getting involved ? If you don’t fancy running for an editorial position - no worries; in the first few weeks of next year we will be running elections for subeditors and encouraging as many people as possible to contribute to our fantastic publications.
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A walk of fresh air William Hobson
Pugwash magazine is the University of Portsmouth Students’ Union’s student lifestyle magazine, containing 44 pages of features and reviews in every one of the five issues printed per year.
by a company of the same name, Nordic Walking, and has earned herself an instructors licence, with she is now she is ready to introduce the people of Portsmouth to the benefits of taking it up as regular form of exercise. Nordic walking is reliably said to make use of 20% more calories than normal walking, and reputedly exercises the whole body, making use of the muscles in both the arms and the legs to raise your heart rate to the peak 75% exertion rate. You use two poles to propel yourself across the ground (concrete or grass), moving in sync with your
legs to push off harder and faster than your normal stride. Although you can pick up quite a pace once you get into the flow, it does not seem like you are doing much work at all, but dozens of athletes attest to its effectiveness in raising your heart beat.
“
You use two poles to propel yourself
It might not be the most macho of sports, but it does seem an
effective one – raising your heart rate without the impact problems of running, and you sweat less than you would legging it over the same distance. If you’re interested, Hattie is offering qualified instruction and equipment rental. Anyone of any ability is welcome, and speaking from experience, it might be a bit strange at first but it does seem like it would be quite effective. For more information email: nordicwalking@hotmail.co.uk. or vist inwa.nordicwalking.com
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Pugwash News Wednesday 23rd April 2008
Arts and Entertainments
A
Gigs Who:
Where: When: Words: Photos:
Dan Le Sac vs Scroobius Pip Wedgewood Rooms Saturday 12th April Aakash Naik Andy Donohoe
It seems like an eternity since Le Sac and Pip released the tremendous ‘Thou Shalt Always Kill’, and with an album on the way yours truly went along to see how things have developed for this London duo. Opening support ‘Producers With Computers’ greet a crowd that was barely there. Perhaps they had sampled their music before arriving and wisely decided to stay away, because what followed was the most soul crushing uninspiring ‘music’ experience no one should have to endure… this is worse than Eliot Minor, people. Ok, well maybe not but it was getting there. (Note to Producers With Computers, samples like “we know that you like us/and you know that its true/we’re Producers with Computers /and we hate you” won’t win you any fans). After drowning my sorrows at the bar I returned hesitantly towards the stage. On strolls ‘Gideon Conn’, who I can only describe as the human manifestation of Ralph Wiggum. Don’t let that put you off though; his music is charming,
simple and gives pop a good name. Here’s hoping the festival bods take notice and book this fellow everywhere; someone who I’m sure will encounter hordes of new followers in the future. Le Sac and Pip eventually arrive onto a stage designed to look like a living room - working TVs, armchairs, paintings, the works, and the Wedge has never looked this pretty since Kate Nash paid it a visit. It seems Le Sac and Pip have been busy after all, and announce that the album will be out in mid-May. What we hear however are samples of ‘Fix Up, look Sharp’ by Dizzee and ‘Planet Telex’ by Radiohead, blasted out alongside some of Le Sac and Pip’s own beats and rather disturbing lyrics about suicide. They make music you can dance to, think to, and feel like a hypocrite to - ‘Thou shalt not buy Coca Cola products / thou shalt not buy Nestle products’ are sung back to the duo with unnerving candour. All in all though, tonight was a great success, and roll on the album.
4/5
S a E i B u i q l K D d c
c I c s T B t T t o h o
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Pugwash News Wednesday 23rd April 2008
Arts and Entertainments
. e l s d g , s . n e t x t s c l t t g a
Who:
Where: When: Words: Photos:
Every Time I Die Wedgewood Rooms Thursday 10th April Laura Callan Laura Callan
Standing through three support acts is usually a bit tedious, but Every Time I Die’s line up is quite impressive. Opening the bill are Blackhole, who energetically warm up the crowd with screaming British hardcore. They’re followed in quick succession by a sweet melodic rock performance from Scary Kids, Scaring Kids, and then by Drop Dead, Gorgeous much to the delight of screeching fans in the crowd. Thundering out the opening cords of “We’rewolf”, Every Time I Die storm the stage as the crowd come alive, thrashing around and screaming the songs back at them. Three songs in, and singer Keith Buckley isn’t happy with beer being thrown over him from the crowd. Towering over the front he calls for the beer-thrower, enlisting the help of his fans and shouting: “Point him out! Get this motherfucker out of here!” The miscreant is not found, but
Keith gets back to business: “We’ve traveled too far to have our night ruined by some anonymous asshole who wants to throw a beer on stage,” he sneers before plunging straight into the next anthem. They rip through the songs the crowd has been waiting for, from albums “Gutter Phenomenon” and “Hot Damn!”, as well as their most recent offering “The Big Dirty”. As the riffs of closing song ‘Ebolarama’ streak through the air the mosh pit erupts. Keith shouts for a circle pit, a command which loyal fans obey, and chaos fills the small venue, before the band exit the stage much too effortlessly cool than to partake in the pretentious encore facade. An effortlessly electric show from the Buffalo, New York band, which leaves me with ringing ears, beer soaked clothes and an agonising wait for the next album.
5/5
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Pugwash News Wednesday 23rd April 2008
Arts and Entertainments
Singles Madonna: Four Minutes Rating: Amanda Greenwood
Madonna is back with yet another re-invention, this time as some sort of tough queen of the streets. With the help of men-of-the-moment, Timbaland and Justin Timberlake, she is definitely a woman who can move with the times. The problem with these two is that although everything they make sounds roughly the same, the songs are incredibly catchy. In 4 Minutes, the beat is addictive, joined by some fun brass and Madonna’s silky vocals that sticks in your head for ages. It’s not typical of the queen of pop and seems like more of a guest performance on a JT song but who cares, it’s a stomping tune.
Hot Chip: One Pure Thought Rating: Chris Hewett
After mainstream success with their second album, ‘The Warning’, Hot Chip offers this track off their latest, ‘Made in the Dark’. In this case Hot Chip definitely delivered. ‘One Pure Thought’ carries on where the last album left off, providing funky beats with the almost inebriating vocals of Alexis Taylor and Joe Goddard. Perhaps one of the most appealing things about this tune is that it doesn’t follow a predictable set up. After an upbeat and catchy guitar intro, the song builds with the chorus before dropping into a funky electro beat as it peaks. Whilst I thought this went flat on the first listen, I’ve given it points for originality in hindsight! As it comes back into the infectiously head nodding chorus, you’ll see that this could be another big tune for Hot Chip over the coming summer. Definitely one for your iPod on the common!
Noah and the Whale: Shape of My Heart Rating: Chris Hewett
Whilst the band offer little that is truly original on the indie/pop scene there is clearly a lot to love about this band. The guitar rhythm that introduces ‘Shape of My Heart’ gives an upbeat and almost hippy
style mood to the song and its only when the vocals kick in that you can hear the true sound of the band. The melancholic and almost dreary vocals of Charlie contrast the chirpiness of the music beautifully and a look at the lyrics reveals a clear irony in the mood of the music. “When I look to the shape of my heart, it’s separated only by scars”, paints a picture of a man sick of the ‘pain of love’. Heavy stuff I know, but the roaring skastyle solo in the middle and the catchy guitar rhythm make it a pretty good summer tune!
Jack McManus: Bang On the Piano Rating: Chris Hewett
Unfortunately I haven’t had the chance to listen to any of Jack McManus’ other offerings but if this one is anything to go by that’s probably a good thing. McManus follows a fairly exhausted pop genre that Maroon 5 and Orson used so successfully. Whilst in many respects it provides exactly that kind of thing, it simply wasn’t my cup of tea and it felt like he was trying a little too hard to get into the charts. With guitar rhythms that are just too poppy and ‘teeny bop’ to appeal to anyone over the age of 16, ‘Bang on The Piano’ provides a predictable and standard tune that perhaps even Mcfly would refuse to put their name to. The chorus begins with the solo singer telling us he’ll “bang on the piano till the feelings come”, I’m not too sure which feelings he’s talking about but they certainly never came to me. This song simply left me wanting to bang on the piano till the music stopped. Better luck next time Jack.
Portishead: Machine Gun Rating: Tallie Kane
This new release by trip-hop legends dispels any doubt that we had about the result of their Hiatus in 1999. ‘Machine Gun’ really puts the Electro genre as a whole to shame, the latter part of the single taken to orchestrating a perfect blend of bass and beats without the need to be completely suffocating. Beth Gibbon’s haunting vocals envelop every ounce of the less than friendly backing track, crafted by Barrow and Utley in a way that only other artists could dream of. With all the dirtiness of their second album
derstatement’ can truly be. It’s difficult to look at The Last Shadow Puppets without making comparisons, but it becomes apparent that none need to be made. Regardless of who’s behind ‘The Age Of The Understatement’, it’s a misfire; nearly working, but not quite.
‘Portishead’ , and the pure beauty of their earlier releases, the track brings adulthood back. Bye-Bye Nu-Rave, Welcome back Portishead, glad to have you with us.
concerned, we can only hope.
Rating:
Rating:
Tallie Kane
Joel Growney
Late of the Piers’ Double AA side brings you a strange inter-generational muddle with where to place this keyboard-packed offering from one of the band’s overcrowding the nu-rave bandwagon. ‘Space and the Woods’, the better of the two tracks, has thoroughly absurd lyrics and has wisely stolen some of the attitude from the growth of the Electro scene which gives the song it’s credibility. ‘Focker’ ruins this release a bit, the opening keyboard screech isn’t cool and is barely saved by the erratic lyrics that punctuate the verses. Just skip the chorus though. It’s like the collaboration between Justice and Simian Mobile Disco happened underwater, in a sea of really bad Asda whiskey. Skip to 2:40 and you’ve got a cracking hit of electro that’s worth listening to the let-down of the record for.
Anything coming from Alex Turner automatically raises expectations. After all, his main band away from this side project are the all conquering Arctic Monkeys. So, how does this, co-starring Miles Kane, singer of The Rascals, fare against the standards fans have come to expect? From the start, it’s clear that this is not the same band that has clinched awards at every ceremony going. The telltale skittering drums and springy guitar are nowhere to be found, or if they are, they are buried beneath brass, strings and a massive sounding choir. But the voice remains. The Sheffield twang is unmistakable, and it is here, in fact, that the song meets a wall. The music doesn’t match the vocals at all; it’s an epic being talked over by a child and ultimately, it limits how enjoyable ‘The Age Of The Un-
Will I Am ft Cheryl Cole: Heartbreaker
Album of the Fortnight
The Last Shadow Late of the Puppets: The Pier: Focker/ Age Of The Space and the UnderstateWoods ment
Rating:
Joel Growney
Perhaps one of the more unexpected, and probably uncalled for, collaborations of recent years, Black Eyed Peas’ Will i Am has got together with Girls Aloud pin up and part time footballers doormat, Cheryl Cole, to release ‘Heartbreaker’, a typically bland three minutes of repetitive r’n’b pop. Even the role of what for some will be the main attraction, Cole, is a bit part, appearing as she does only on the chorus as essentially a backing singer, and then again to repeatedly ask us to ‘break it down’ with what can be assumed to be some sort of dance routine to match. Admittedly, it’s unlikely that this won’t do well; within it’s field its bound to be a success, but maybe if a little more of the Girls Aloud sound had been allowed to creep into the song, as it so easily could have, Will i Am could have finally been involved with something actually exciting, with wider appeal than the dance floor on a Saturday night. One of the first lines of ‘Heartbreaker’ is “I know karma’s coming to get me back.” and as far as those involved in it’s creation are
Thrice The Alchemy Index Volumes 3 & 4; Air And Earth Rating: Joel Growney
Following on from last year’s Fire
Every week we’ll be showing a chart of the Top 5 artists that the members of our Last.fm group have been listening to, if you want your music scrobbled, log in and add the Pugwash chart.
Go to upsu.net/lastfm
1
Radiohead
2
Bloc Party
3
Hot Chip
4
We Are Scientists
5
Incubus
and Water counterpart, U.S rockers-turned-experimentalists Thrice continue their journey into the left field of hardcore with these, the final sections of their Alchemy Index project. Ambitiously seeking to represent each of the four elements in song, Earth brings us half a dozen rustic, bluesy songs, whilst with Air we get six tracks of open, chiming post-rock reminiscent of Pelican or latter day Radiohead. Make no mistake, this is a diverse collection of songs, further showcasing the adept songwriting of a band who used to be known for their pacy and furious post-hardcore. Some may be put off by the high minded concept which drives this record, but knowledge of Thrice’s intent isn’t needed to enjoy Air and Earth. Songs such as Daedalus and Come All You Weary are given room to breathe and grow on their own here, and ultimately turn what could have been an embarrassingly gimmicked oddity into a unique and progressive victory for the band. A record about earth, water, air and fire may seem a little pretentious, but when the end result is as masterful as The Alchemy Index, who cares? Thrice are voyaging into the unexplored; go with them.
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Pugwash News Wednesday 23rd April 2008
Arts and Entertainments
Interview: The Ting Tings Interview: Luke Hall talks to Manchester two piece the Ting Tings; “talking to you is like an awkward first date. But Katie likes your hair”. When the band have finished sound-checking I corner the tour manager and get ushered backstage where I meet the two-piece Jules and Katie. However you want to categorise their take on indie-rock music it is important to make one thing clear: they write extremely catchy pop songs - as anyone who has heard “Great DJ” will confirm. They are clearly excited to be on their first headlining tour. I ask what it is like being in a band of only two people. “We still create a lot of noise on stage thanks to backing tracks”,
they respond, “with bass guitar and keyboard parts on. The best thing is sharing the drinks rider between only two people” He opens a fridge door to show me almost endless rows of beer bottles. Katie tells me all about how the band formed and how they try and keep in control of everything they do with their music. The pair are part of a large collective of musicians, artists and performers from Manchester based in the Islington Mill, hand designing almost all of their vinyl single sleeves with help from friends and artists using old record sleeves bought in charity shops. Jules tells me that he found a few old gems in there including some Bowie records. The pair agree that if they
Theatre Gone With The Wind Rating: Isobel Rigg
On April 5th, I attended the preview of the West End musical production of Gone With The Wind (based on Margaret Mitchell’s 1936 novel, and the iconic 1939 film of the same name). As a life-long fan of Gone With The Wind, I knew there was a chance I’d expect too much from the play, but I wasn’t expecting to be so disappointed. The play does have some positive aspects to it: visually it’s a chocolate fountain for the eyes, completely gorgeous and luxurious. The attention to detail with the costumes and set design is exceptional and very loyal to those elements of the film. Acting-wise, Pop Idol’s Darius Danesh surprises the audience by exhibiting all the suave, charm and charisma needed to play the hero Rhett Butler. Fairly unknown theatre actress Jill Palce shines as heroine Scarlett O’Hara. However the play does have its faults. For those who know the plot of Gone With
Words: Luke Hall Photos: Andy Donohoe could work with anyone in music it would be David Bowie, but only on the condition that he doesn’t wear the tight trousers he wore in the film “Labyrinth”. “If we could go on tour with anyone in the world it would be Michael Palin. When we were in London after a radio interview we saw Michael in the waiting area and mobbed him with excitement, only for him to mistake us for the runners telling him he was due on air. Jules had to explain we were in a band but are huge fans.” I ask for some words of wisdom to enlighten the students of Portsmouth and Jules tells me that the best sandwich to eat on tour is the Roadie Wrap. “All you need is ham and hummus,” he says, reaching
for another drink. The Ting Tings’ debut album “We Started Nothing” is released on May 19th. Gig Review: There is only one support act tonight and it arrives in the form of Anni Rossi and her viola. The Wedgewood Rooms are packed as Anni takes the stage. She only whispers a few words of thanks to the audience during her set, but her beautifully crafted pop songs and immense playing talent speaks far louder. It’s amazing how only a voice and a viola can make all the indie scenesters in the venue dance and cheer. Even when she knocks her instrument out of tune and has to stop mid-song it only makes the crowd clap for more. I highly recommend you listen to “Wheel-
pusher”. Then it’s time for the Ting Tings; they run onstage and open with “Great DJ” which gets people jumping. For a two person band they certainly make a lot of noise, aided in part by a substantial backing track. Katie is full of energy, throwing herself around like she might not see tomorrow and Jules sports a massive pair of shades. At night. Half way through their set they play “Traffic Light”, a toned down number with just guitar and vocals where Katie shows any critics that she isn’t just a pretty face, she can belt out a tune as well. They finish with “That’s Not My Name” a firm crowd favourite and absolutely everyone is dancing by now. The pair whirl back on stage to quickly encore “We Started Nothing”, a song from their upcoming debut album and everyone is left breathless but happy.
Film The Wind, there is the unpleasant surprise of the play’s creative team inventing characters who affect the story significantly. Neither the book nor film contained any lyrics, and although some of the play’s songs are sung well (though quite Disney-esque at times), most of them do nothing to add to the story line and appear to be simply there to fill time. As the preview was four hours long, the creative team needed to cut content out, not pad the play out with pretty yet meaningless songs which continuously and irritatingly disrupt the flow of
the narrative.
Son of Rambow Rating: Chris Walsh
The ‘80s are back. Everybody’s copying, remaking or referencing something that was popular then. There’s the recent Die Hard sequel, the Transformers movie and Sly Stallone’s resurrected both his Rocky and Rambo characters. Amongst all this, Son of Rambow hit our screens last week. Like Be Kind, Rewind, a film about homemade homages, Son of Rambow follows two friends as they make their own sequel to Rambo: First Blood. Will Proudfoot, a shy, creative boy held back by his strict religious family, meets Lee Carter, the school’s craftiest troublemaker – and they agree to enter ScreenTest, a BBC kids competition. Together these different kids embark on an adventure to rival Rambos - there’s violence, a cool French exchange kid, space dust and drug-fuelled common room dancing, plus fun with high pressure water and high volt-
age electricity and plenty of jumping in lakes and off trees. Full of don’t-try-this-at-home hijinks, Will and Lee run around fighting ninjas and flying dogs as they film Will’s odd script. Laugh-out-loud family fun, with nostalgia for parents and plenty of drama, comedy and action for everyone.
Funny Games Rating: Joel Growney
While the prospect of an American remake of a critically acclaimed foreign film would normally be cause for alarm, Funny Games stands out as a shining example of how they could, and should, be done. Admittedly, this is probably due to everything about both this and the Austrian original being the same, except the cast, but still; rather that than the typical sanitised and cleaned up money spinner. Comparisons and complaints
about the state of Hollywood aside, Funny Games tells an uncomfortable tale of torture and tension, as a pair of psychopaths terrorise an innocent family in their home, placing a bet with them that they will not survive the next twelve hours. So far, so standard, but where Funny Games excels and truly makes an impact is in its relationship with the audience, and knowledge of what is expected from a film such as this. Frequently, the viewer is asked what they would like to see next, leading us to question our own morality and implying that by endorsing such events we become complicit in their undertaking. Within horror, the audience eagerly anticipates the deaths of characters, and revels in their suffering; it’s what we expect of the genre. But within the real world, such behaviour is unacceptable. The question asked by the film’s writer and director, Michael Haneke, is seemingly this; when a complete world on screen is created for us, why should we abandon the rules we abide by in our daily lives? After watching Funny Games, the answer is not easy to find.
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Purple Wednesday Wednesday 23rd April 2008
Sports
Dodge ball is a sport of violence, exclusion and derogation! Sunday 13th April saw the return of the intramural Dodgeball tournament at the Nuffield Sports Centre, with the AU exec dressed as ‘angry’ cave women (Sleazy’s idea). This time badminton made more effort… they wore their tour tops instead of their social tops, whilst Hockey took recycling seriously, dressed in bin liners and Tesco bags. The football team turned up in their pyjamas and pink fluffy dressing gowns and the lack of dressing up from 1CR and the Rugby team was noted. (We expect more effort next time!) After team talks and back combing of the hair, the games commenced and balls started flying everywhere. If you can dodge a wrench you can dodge a ball, but no one was safe on or off the pitch whilst Hockey was playing. Some balls were dodged, some were caught and some caused players a great deal of pain, with Sheila tak-
ing a ball to the face! Once again the girls were seen as moving targets; some tried to hide, some ran off pitch but then Marisa managed to stay on for three minutes solo, playing with the hockey boy’s balls. It’s a shame their throws were as straight as Julian Clary. The first round of games were over and now it was getting serious! The three bottom teams were the AU exec (as usual), football ‘team of woes’ in pyjamas (with the help of Peppa and Marisa), and Tesco bag Hockey. They had to battle it out to win the wooden spoon title. The AU exec played well, but were no match for Tesco bag Hockey (were their girls guys in drag?) or footballers in pyjamas. The battle was on! The team of woes rearranged their dressing gowns, pulled their socks up and got it together just in time to annihilate Tesco bag Hockey and take home the wooden spoon, a turn of events no one saw coming! In the play offs there was a tense atmosphere! An intramural dodge-
ball first occurred; sudden death! The victims were Sheila on team 1CR and a brave badminton girl. With their game faces on they stood facing each other as the room fell silent… quick reflexes and a swift hand won Sheila the point! The finals were bin bag Hockey and 1CR; the clash of the titans. They went head to head for the second tournament in a row! Who would take the title home this time? Would hockey claim first place for the second time in a row or would all that pent up homosexual frustration get 1CR the gold? Balls were thrown in an exciting game but hockey were not to claim the title for a second time as 1CR tore up the pitch and won the game. The day was a great success; a lot of fun was had by all, there were a lot of bruises for some and once again the AU exec had all the gear and no idea! A big thank you to all that helped out, to Zahra and Caz, and to those who played. Remember look after your balls and they will look after you!
and although they still possessed the natural skill, they could not match the desire and work rate of the south coast team. Portsmouth went into half time six to three down and with a lot of work to do. However that extra push had been costly for the lads, lack of fitness was beginning to show and with a half to go Portsmouth needed to maintain the intensity. This effort was dealt a further blow when two-goal-man Liam O’Mahoney was helped off with a shoulder injury and would play no further part in the game. The rest of the match saw Edinburgh slow down
the play and attack at will. Pompey were able to respond with another goal, however for all their efforts, were unable to secure a place in the finals. Mercifully, the lads were granted little time to dwell on the first competitive defeat they have experienced this season; Saturday saw the final week of League action and Bristol were the visitors to Fortress Langstone. Pompey appeared to be suffering a cup hangover in addition to missing a number of key players. In a scrappy game littered with personal errors and unnecessary mistakes, the league leaders
drew four to four, narrowly avoiding their first defeat of the season thanks to a last minute goal from President Jim Hitchman. This result leaves Pompey undefeated in the league but with 12 wins prior to this tie, the lads will feel disappointed not to retain their 100% record. Although the league may be over, lacrosse in Portsmouth is far from finished. The lads travel to Reading this Saturday for the final of the ‘Flags’ trophy, hoping to acquire their second piece of silverware during this prodigious season. We wish them the best of luck!
Peppa Barnett, Marisa May & Catherine Bird
i es’ t e i c o S al is v i n r Ca e 2nd h t n o M ay
U PRFC h av e m ad e i t to th e fi n al of t h e Sessa C up
Tu esday 13t h M a y t h e foot ba ll c lu b a r e orga n is in g com edy n a ig ht at Jong l eU rs
Ski & b oa rd S now d e i t a hav e m na ls tio to Na on d M ay r 3 e h t
Foot ba ll teams Sixth, Fourth and Th irds ar e playing th eir finals th is we ek !
Lacrosse club
Lacrosse Suffer Setback Ben Endley Lacrosse Media Secretary
Two fixtures in four days proved too tough for Portsmouth University this week as they saw the first dip in results during what has otherwise been a perfect season. Wednesday saw the men’s team make the long trip up to Manchester for the much anticipated BUSA National Championship Semi Finals. Their opponents, Edinburgh, are widely regarded as the best University Lacrosse side in Great Britain. A 11-4 defeat is therefore
in no way to Portsmouth’s shame. Although Edinburgh enjoyed the better of the early running, evidently more skilful than Portsmouth, they dominated the first quarter and only dogged defending prevented Edinburgh gaining more than their four goal cushion. To be several goals behind following the first quarter has been an alien concept to the lads this year and so the second quarter performance is to their tremendous credit; simply put Portsmouth took the fight to them. Suddenly it was the Scottish (well most of them were American) side that were looking shaky
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Purple Wednesday Wednesday 23rd April 2008
Sports
University of Portsmouth players in MVP Game
Amercian Football
Last Saturday (12th April) saw the annual British Universities American Football League MVP game between Team North and Team South. Over the previous two weeks trials were held at Reading University in order to determine the final Team South squad for the game. Three players from the University of Portsmouth American Football team made the journey to Reading to try out for Team South, which features the best players from over 20 Universities that make up the Southern Conference. The three players that made the journey were; Defensive End Mike Hollands (3rd Year), Free Safety Stephen Yates (3rd Year) and Offensive Lineman Ben Peddie (2nd Year). Each Saturday involved two intense all day training sessions featuring the best coaches from across the Southern Universities and over 140 hopeful University
Match Report Men’s Football 6th team Simon O’Connor
players eager to impress. The days’ training involved positional drills, one on ones, skeleton drills and full scrimmages. At the end of the first week a cut was made, with only the best players being invited back to the trials the following week. After both trials and following impressive performances from all three players, they were delighted to hear they had all been selected in the squad of 40 to face the north in a match that will showcase the best talent in University American Football in the country. All three players have played at both University and National Senior level for the local south coast senior team the Southern Sundevils. Stephen Yates and Mike Hollands are both coming into their 3rd year of playing American Football. Both players had a major hand in setting up our own university team, the Portsmouth Destroyers, with Yates scoring the first ever Portsmouth Destroyers Touchdown. Both have just completed their final
year playing with the Destroyers due to graduation. Ben Peddie has just completed his second season playing for the Destroyers and is looking to lead the team into the playoffs next season. This season has seen the Portsmouth Destroyers go three to five in the league, missing out on a playoff spot by a matter of a few points. This is something they will be looking to improve on next season. Three players getting into the southern MVP squad is a major achievement for a team in only their second season of competitive football; the team will look to build on this in the future and in years to come will hopefully be challenging for the University Championship. All three players would like the say thank you to the coaches that have helped them get to the level they are at now and all their fellow team mates that have worked and played alongside them for the past couple of seasons. Congratulations boys!
Safe to say, the Sixth team away fixtures have been anything but simple this year, and today wasn’t without its fundamental failures. Minibus driver Ms May arrived 20 minutes late from Greggs and a further crisis occurred when a passenger/capacity mis-match came close to scenes at Heathrow. Never fear; Laddi pulled out his lady skills and convinced Peppa Jane to drive for an undisclosed fee, sorted off the record. When we arrived we discovered that not only is Winchester playing grounds in total destruction, but they are building an all weather Olympic facility, therefore NO changing rooms... As per usual we lost the toss for kick off. In the early moments of the game, tackles were flying in as Barbar gave away a free kick that must rank in Sessa cup history (0:08 seconds). The scrappy start continued till some fluid down the left hand side won a corner. The new Sixth tactics worked a treat as Tommy Bobs delivered a beautiful deep corner which was converted by the ever improving Tony from skins. The game became closely fought and neither side wanted to give away the upper hand. Chances fell to Connor and Clarky, but Clarky couldn’t stretch the Purple lead.
Separated at Birth
Banter
From Pompey to Poirot
Poirot
Then well known cup twists, Winchester, took a wicked deflection into the roof of the net. The sixth team were in complete disbelief, mostly because all that Winchester showed throughout the whole first half was a semi decent long ball and a set play organised as well as Bolton of old. Half time: the heat was taking its toll and drinks were first on the agenda. Reminded the lads that the team that does the simple things the best in this half will win today because we were unmatched at playing the ball on the deck. With little change to the tempo and some half chances for either side, the subs were introduced, Iain Black for Tommy Bobs and soon after Laddi for Fausto Fantastic. Both subs reassured the control of the game and it soon changed in our favour. Some neat work between Ginge and Cattermole moved the play into midfield, where a precession pass to Connor opened the space to attack. After beating the first defender his pass into Laddi would setup the solo effect to put the Sixth team into the next final. His 20 yard right foot shot pinged in off the post; the goalie had no chance. (Did Peppa Jane blush when it went in? We’ll never know.) Portsmouth won 2-1 after shutting out the last 10 minutes in midfield. Congratulations lads, bring on the final!
From Pompey to Rob Brydon
Gotchas Tom Worman has been skipping Purple Wednesdays Maybe a lot more came back from tour than just kiss-and-tells A certain design bod likes walking into revolving doors Bird has difficulty getting on stage Peppa won’t present awards until she gets a kiss Donohoe might be able to DJ but really can’t sing Lewd and sleazy can be condensed into Sludious The AU exec are too ‘busy’ to have supplied decent gotchas... ;o)
Leigh Higgins
Rob Brydon
Rhys
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Purple Wednesday Wednesday 23rd April 2008
Sports
ness took its toll, a very good debut bout.” Debuting in bout four was University Boxer Darragh Grimes, whose opponent was the more experienced T Ratcliff from the City Of Portsmouth ABC. Gardiner commented that “Darragh performed fantastically in his first ever bout against a boy who has had nine contests; the scores were extremely close and I was very impressed by his performance. He may have lost the bout but proved that he will be a force in the future.” The next bout saw lightweight competitors pitted against each other, with Matt ‘The Whirlwind’ Wilcock taking on L Freeman from Bournemouth. Matt boxed with brains instead of brawn, using his long reach to score significant points scoring blows, making him a unanimous victor. Matt was thrilled with his victory, holding his winners trophy with pride on the way back to the dressing room. Next up was James ‘Boom Boom’ Bossom against A Todd from the Met Police. James worked extremely hard against a taller and more experienced boxer, forcing the pace to grind out a deserved victory. The final bout before the break saw two University boxers take on each other; Adam Insam and Simon Welch. This was a highly entertaining bout with both boxers landing some quality combinations, with Adam claiming victory. During the interval the breakdancing society put on a show in the ring to entertain a packed Lux. The first bout after the restart saw a fantastic performance from
Mick ‘The Rhino’ O’Sullivan who was up against S Bhanot (Met Police). Mick dominated with skill and technique, landing solid shots almost at will. Paul Barrie, the Metropolitan Police Coach, pulled his lad at the end of the second round to save him from further punishment. Gardiner said “I have never seen him so relaxed” when asked how he thought Mick performed. O’Sullivan said “it was a good fight, I had a good opponent from the Met Police. He gave it his all and so did we we and we got the win.” Mick went on to add “It’s a great club and I’d like to thank Wayne, Q and all the boys”. The Ninth bout in saw Jimmy ‘Psycho’ Potter take on Police Officer Michael Bahh, the youngest member of the Met Police Squad. Jimmy used his well founded jab, landing with speed at every angle as his opponent tried to attack, giving a unanimous victory. The next fight saw another all-Portsmouth bout: Mike Saunders took on Matt Harding. These two lads had a battle worthy of any boxing ring, with the imminent result of the bout swinging backwards and forwards. The victory was not immediately clear until the final stages of the fight, when Matt Harding was announced the victor. Bout 11 saw the only heavyweight contest of the night with George ‘The Greek Grenade’ Geogakakis against A Crane of Met Police ACB. The fight really got the crowd fired up, especially when Geogakakis ended up on top of his opponent. However, the Portsmouth boxer lost his focus and had a hard night, failing to perform to his abilities. The referee stopped the bout in the second round.
Ish ‘Bish Bash’ Al-Abady vs Ali ‘Tounge in Cheek’ Zaki, who are both Portsmouth boys were up next, both were well schooled boxers, each trying to outsmart and out power the other. This was another highly contested bout with Ish AlAbady just edging the victory. Bout thirteen saw Navy Boxer Mark Coombs take on Portsmouth’s own Naz Zapouri. Coombs maintained a high level of work against an awkward, stocky and durable opponent; both lads had spats of success. In the end however the victory went to Zapouri. The final bout of an entertaining evening saw Uni boxing club captain Dan ‘Happy Man’ Hendy take on Sam Couzens from Gosport. Hendy was facing an obviously bigger opponent and had to push himself hard to stay with the everaggressive Couzins. In the last two rounds Hendy forced the pace, and both boys stood centre ring trading blows with the crowd going nuts. Hendy lost on points but showed a lot of heart in the ring. Club President Dave Hickey, who was unable to box due to being ill earlier in the week, told Pugwash News: “I’m really gutted, [I] really wanted to box the Police. All the boys are proud to be at this level, the standard of boxing is the best it’s ever been. The boys are superb - they are the best athletes in the University”. Wayne Gardiner added: “I am over the moon with all the lads and the whole event, I must put a special thank to all the lads and lasses that run the show. These people do not get enough credit; without their work, the show would not have been possible ... A special mention must go to James Connor who has had the season of his life.” Photos: Luke Simmonds and Lucy Henry
Pompey pummel Met Plod! Continued from page 16
S
Sporto Challenge Every fortnight we pit two of our sportos against each of the in a fast paced Q&A session to see who’s cooler. Oh, and they have to draw a donkey too... Decide for yourself.
League Table Top 5 Sportos
Score
Marisa May
19
Peppa Barnett
18
Andrew Machin
17
Andy Watson
17
Jamie Atherton
17
Leigh Higgins Football 4th Team Captain
Jamie Atherton Women’s Football (Vice President)
What level do you play at? International - I venture to Wales every now and again! Have you ever… Been on tour? Of course! A third year veteran! Kissed a person of the same sex? My housemates get a kiss every night! Won any silverware for the University? If you count runner’s up silverware then yeah! Beaten cup finalists and 2nd in the league three years running! Slept outside? Many a time! The beach, Sainsburys’ and the Fleet Garden! Played Touch Cup? Terrible game, so no! I play a proper game! Goggles on! Becawwwww! Been naked in public? All the time! Been asked to leave the Union? Yep, not always by the bouncers though! ;) And I keep getting thrown out of bloody Jongleurs! Two weeks on the trot at the mo! Anyone know the record?! Missed a lecture to play sports / to do soco stuff? I didn’t know uni had lectures! Uni is all about football! Do you have a MIDAS (mini bus) license? No but I can drive a tractor! How many times have you been “gotcha’d”? Never! I’m a good boy! Is Snakebite your choice of beverage at the Union? Probably. Accompanied by a ‘Buca though! How many societies / clubs have you represented at uni? (1 point for each club) Like I said earlier: Speed Dating, Football and Tiddlywinks! Now draw us a donkey...
What level do you play at? 4th team of dreams Have you ever… Been on tour? I thought it was compulsory? Kissed a person of the same sex? Emotions run high after a few beers.... Won any silverware for the University? Runners up medal in a cup final and the best moment of my life involving a wooden spoon and a dodge ball Slept outside? I like to pitch a tent now and again Played Touch Cup? Yeah, took on some rugby boys and they royally screwed me! Been naked in public? My clothes seem to evade me after a night out! Been asked to leave the Union? More like tricked outside for a ‘talk’ with the bouncers Missed a lecture to play sports / to do soco stuff? Most of the time but the lecturers are so understanding Do you have a midas (mini bus) license? Urm should I have!? How many times have you been “gotcha’d”? None, though watch this space... Is Snakebite your choice of beverage at the Union? Snakebite in my left hand and a ‘Buca in the right, lovely touch How many societies / clubsC have you represented at uni? (1 point for each club) Football! Now draw us a donkey...
Score: 15
M f
D
1 a C a r t (
Score: 17
H l l R c h n
15
Purple Wednesday Wednesday 23rd April 2008
Sports
Behind the scenes with the...
THE CRICKET CLUB Want to see your club committee team here? Email: sportsnews@upsu.net
Every week we will be bring you an insight into the people behind your University of Portsmouth sports teams. The committees are the life blood of your sport so we want to give you a bit more information about who they are and what they do. This issue we bring you the cricket team. Tim “Teddy” Over President Big Dog King Pin of the game! Teasing right arm bowler with a love of loud vocal banter, normally in the form of ‘stolen’ hockey chants.
Who are you? Tim Meo “Tim Tim” Which Club or Society are you in? Sailing
Dan Brooks Vice-President
How old are you? 21
The ladies’ club bicycle, everyone’s had a go! Has his bat then goes home, back troubles. Can’t handle the shot bar.
Where are you from? Norwich First Portsmouth curry? Port Solent
Harrison “Roulette” Moseley 1st XI Captain
Favourite Movie? Notting Hill
Lost his entire loan gambling, slowly trying to win it back. Bats elegantly but bowls like a twelve year old school girl. Says “Yes, v shaped” a lot. Most likely to be seen preening his hair.
What puts a smile on your face? A boat laden with alcholic beverages What wipes it off? Getting lost at sea whilst drunk Most embarrassing moment? Being banned from the navy sailing center
Steve “Steve-O” Belcher 2nd XI Capt
Best chat up line? “Alrite bird. Want to come for a ride in my boat?”
Monobrow opener. Bowls funny, runs funny... Generally a funny guy. Most likely to be bottling the warm up and always padding up first
Favourite uni memory? Sailing event in Weymouth - we got very, very drunk, in boats...
Gavin “Sex Pest” Pearse 3rd XI Captain
How quickly can you down a pint? Not very quickly. I can down a large glass of wine in a few seconds though!
Well rounded guy, Sharp behind the stumps. Most likely to be joining the girls’ socials! A massive fan of thongs and French knickers.
Favourite dressing-up theme? Pimps and hoes
“Spinner” Dave Broers Social Secretary
What three questions would you ask if you went on a blind date? 1) Do you like boats? 2) Do you like wine? 3) Are you single?
Fresher’s Rugby 3rd Point of View XV Match Report Cathy Boorer, UPSAC Fresher
Course: Marine Environmental Science Hometown: Portsmouth All right, I have a confession to make – I came to Uni intending to NOT join a University dive club. I’d been diving for years, mostly on holiday with my parents, and thought that I’d do something different now I was at Uni. After walking round the Fresher’s Fayre and realising that I’d just signed up to two clubs that I’d probably never go to, I saw the UPSAC (University of Portsmouth Sub Aqua Club) stand with the club boat outside, and all the people messing about having fun, and thought ‘sod it, I want to dive!’ I chickened out of the Fresher’s pub crawl since I was actually painfully shy at the beginning of my Uni life, but forced myself to go along to the weekly pub meeting the following Tuesday. I was immediately accosted by an older member who refused to let me be a loner in the corner and wouldn’t leave me alone till she’d introduced me to everyone in the entire club! Everyone was so friendly, and I was told about all the dive trips I could go on since I was already qualified, and everyone started talking about the socials that were going on that I ‘had’ to go to! UPSAC has so much going on – in any one week I could be at the weekly pub meeting on a Tuesday, a pub crawl on Thursday, climbing trees on Saturday, and then diving on a Sunday followed by a drink in the pub. It’s practically impossible to remain an ‘outsider’ in this club – it’s technically possible to even not go diving all year, and still be an active member of the club! The great thing about UPSAC as well is that I know the fun won’t end when I finish Uni – we’ve got so many older members and if looking through someone’s baby photos when you’re out dancing at the Fuzzy Duck doesn’t make you feel like part of the UPSAC family, I don’t know what would!
Andy Watson
After the end of a long and grueling league campaign, Men’s Rugby Third XV have reached the final of a Sessa Cup, following their utter annihilation of Bucks & Chilts Second XV! The score line of 67-5 was a fair reflection of their dominance throughout the 80 minutes. The visiting team did pose a slight threat for the first five mins but after that offered nothing. Tries flew in from all directions after superb work upfront by the pack; notably from C Tappin, Pritch and A Machin (who by the way is back on Atkins!) In fact it was Jaffa’s idol, the man who has successfully conquered Atkins, Hayward, who could just not stop scoring with a hat-trick, and some superbly illegal stamping to boot! Mention must also go out to the backline, who defended superbly; not once can I recall the opposition making a clean break. Great tackling from J Poyner and M Brown was one of our major strengths. Unfortunately they did not get too much of a chance to run with ball in hand… due to the sole reason that R Bray never passes. This proved to be the case as he too scored three tries (in the first half)! The backs’ case was not helped by the fact we had a prop playing flyhalf in the form of Weymouth! Support and banter along with a few sneaky beers was flowing superbly up at Langstone. Let’s hope the Thirds can emulate the same performance this coming Wednesday, when they face Bucks and Chilts First XV… and judging by the way our boys utterly dispatched their Second team, Bucks should be soiling their bed sheets! The Final is being played at London Wasps Ground, Adams Park. Kickoff is at 5.30pm on Wednesday. Coaches are being organised for supporters, so get involved and get down there. Good luck boys, get the job done!! Bloody Cheers.
Tip of the week: Work hard, drink hard
Married to Steve-O. Looks like a chav, mostly. Most likely to be eyeing up new fancy dress ideas and wearing his girlfriends clothing. Also a fan of thongs.
Cricket
Sailing
Men’s Cricket: 1’s vs. 2’s friendly
Sailing Club 1st Team Storm BUSA!
Dave Broers
1st XI batted first and put 256 as a score to chase (H. Moseley Half Century). 2nd XI were resistant and steady but lacked a burst of runs and conceded after battling the 45 overs for a score of 164-3 (Jonny Mills, 60 odd). Two wickets down and Robert H shuffled to the creases. Robert looked shaky against some tricky left arm medium pace. Next over, Robert had to face up to some high class left arm orthodox, breathing heavily after running three. Robert nudged forward to a testing length
delivery that moved miles off the pitch, and guided the ball inches wide of slip to the vacant third man area. After running another two, Robert was exhausted. However, the next ball proved too good for Robert, who lunged forward, and realised he hadn’t the skill nor the ability to deal with the bowling and managed only to dolly the ball back to the bowler, a fine catch. So Robert left the field to sit in the pavilion for the next 30 overs and contemplate just how wrong he had been in his predictions. There were no sixes and certainly no need for anyone at cow corner.
After a season’s worth of training, and various events all over the country from Exeter to Glasgow, fighting off stiff completion from numerous other sailing universities, Portsmouth First team made it to the prestigious B U S A Te am R a cin g F ina l s . T h e event, hosted by Oxford Uni sailing club at Farmoore reservoir over the Easter break, consisted of three day’s worth of round robyns sailing, with competitors taking part in over 280 races. 38 teams qualified to the finals. The weather caused problems with a severe lack of wind on the first two days testing all the teams’ skills. Portsmouth sailed through it and
gained a top place in the gold league. The wind changed on the third day drastically, from dead calm to very windy, with winds predicted between 30 - 40 knots, on the edge of team racing conditions. The day saw some extreme sailing from the Portsmouth team; by lunchtime Portsmouth had made it through to the quarter finals and won their first race against Bristol. At this point the wind strengthened and all teams where called in off the water for their own safety. Unfortunately no more races could take place, due to the massive weather front, so the quarter, semi and finals were worked
out on points, sadly meaning that the first achievable dream of third, or potentially higher could not become reality. Six unhappy sailors left the event, however all then realised the actual achievement: the team had come 7th at BUSA, out of 75 teams, at a university that doesn’t even sail the boats they race in and gained 11 BUSA points for the AU. Portsmouth haven’t made it to the finals in a considerable length of time, so huge congratulations should be given to Portsmouth sailing Club First Teams: Guy Brearey & Kate Hutchins, Sam Brearey & Jo Coe, and Edd Chapman & Becky Hyde
Pompey pummel Met Plod!
Luke Simmonds
High tensions arose as The University of Portsmouth Amateur Boxing Club (ABC) took on the Metropolitan Police Amateur Boxing Club and other contenders from across the area, spanning 14 bouts throughout the night of 17th April in Lux. Before the boxing commenced, UoP Dance Club entertained the
Banter Inside... P12: Sports Noticeboard, Dodgeball, Lacrosse
photos: Tom Worman, Lucy Henry and Luke Simmonds
P13: Separated at birth, American Football, Football
crowd with a police-themed performance in the ring, which prepared the atmosphere for an eventful evening. The First bout featured UoP ABC’s James ‘The Baby Bomber’ Connor pitted against J Kemkaren from the Met Police. A beautiful display of boxing by Connor earned him a unanimous victory and also the best boxer of the night overall,
chosen by the referees and judges. A packed crowd then enjoyed the second bout of the evening in which Paul ‘Kappa’ Kapnesi took on C Jarvis from Eastleigh. Paul used precise punches to gain a deserved points victory against a tall durable opponent. The first and only female bout of the evening followed shortly after, with Hannah Harding taking on
Helen Hughes from the Met Police. This was Hannah’s first competitive bout, but wasn’t showing it with an enthusiastic effort until her eventual defeat. Hughes used her greater experience and fitness to push forward and edge the win. Head Coach Wayne Gardiner said: “Hannah gave everything and was winning the bout up to the last round where fit-
P14: Boxing, Sporto Challenge, Donkeys P15: Behind the Scenes with Cricket club, Fresher’s POV, Rugby
Gotchas! Bringing back the banter: Purple Wednesdays’ usual stitch-ups
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Athletics Union
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AU Dinner Speaker Announced
PWs needs your club news!
Laura Patricia
... and features, and photos, and socials, and anything else you want to tell us about your club! It’s easy to get a mention in PWs - just e-mail everything to sportnews@ upsu.net, visit www.upsu.net/newsdesk, or come in to the Sabb Office at the Union and have a chat with us any time!
This year’s AU Dinner will take place at the Guildhall on the 3rd of May. If you want tickets, please see your Sports Officer in the Sabb office. Peter Shilton, former football goalkeeper, will be gracing us with his presence at the event this year as guest speaker. Shilton, who played for the England Team from 19701990, and managed Plymoth Argyle for three years, played over a thousand matches before his retirement from the sport. He has recieved both the MBE and OBE for his contribu-
tion to sport over thirty years. Since retiring, he appeared on Sky One’s “The Match” and did numerous interviews and opinion pieces for various papers. He now earns a living speaking at events, and has “an array of amusing anecdotes and motivating moments” to share with the students of Portsmouth. “His after dinner speaking gives people the chance to hear about some of English football’s finest and most controversial moments”, and we’re sure he will be a welcome addition to the AU Dinner programme. www.petershilton.com