Pugwash News - Issue 28 by Tom Worman

Issue 28 Wednesday 29.04.09

Planning ahead

Guide to Summer Festivals

Comment & Opinion » p5

Life & Style » p8 & p9

Eco award for UPSU

Lecturers’ Union demands huge 8% pay rise. University brand threat as “out of line”. Employers accuse Lecturer’s union of “seriously misleading”. UPSU urges staff to put education first.

William Hobson & Jacob Leverett

Sarah Morcom

The University of Portsmouth Students’ Union has been recognised as one of the ‘greenest’ Unions in the country after winning an environmental award. The UPSU was awarded Silver accreditation in The Sound Environmental Impact Awards, which encourages students to do their bit for the environment. Only four other universities received the award at this level. Employees of our Union here in Portmsouth have spent the last year working towards a Bronze accreditation, but decided to try going for Silver after vast improvements. Student Support Officer Caz Bird says small changes add up to a big thing: “Ensuring all staff switch off computers and lights at the end of the day and printing double-sided paper have made a difference.” She added “This award demonstrates the dedication of our staff, students and volunteers to respect our environment.”

Meters were installed to see how much water was being used, and to remedy the problem of wasting water a timed automatic clean in the mens’ toilets was implemented. The Union is also monitoring their electricity usage, with the aim of making savings soon. 95% of lights in the Union have been replaced with energy saving bulbs, and bottles being recycled from the bar have also increased by 95% - which means an estimated 15,000 drinks bottles are being recycled instead of to going to landfall sites. To be awarded the silver award, the UPSU team had to score 400 points overall and meet 22 bronze and 11 silver criteria. The Union is now the proud owner of an exclusively designed Silver Standard award - made out of recycled wellington boots.. Over a million students across the UK have seen things change in their Union because of the initiative; The Sound Environmental Impact awards are in their third year and are run by the NUS Services department.

We’ve got tickets to Bestival, Boardmasters, Relentless NASS and Summer Break to give away

Lecturers’ Union threaten strike • • • •

photo: Peter Allsop

N WI

Universities throughout the UK may be disrupted by a strike by lecturers and staff this year. The University College Union (UCU) are concerned over job cuts and the what they class as “the lack of a credible pay offer” although the amount the UCU are demanding is an inflation busting 8%. The UCU's fears over job cuts had been heightened when Universities and Colleges Employers Association told the UCU it expected around 100 institutions to make collective redundancies. Ballot papers will begin to be issued on 1 May and the ballot will conclude on 22 May. The UCEA however has accused the UCU of attempting to conflate pay negotiations with scaremongering about local job losses in the sector. The UCEA also suggests the UCU “are seriously misleading” its members. The move to ask members to vote on the strike was suggested after The Universities and Colleges Employers Association suggested that the union should be patient over demands to check job-cuts in further education. Every member of the UCU including over 400 University of Portsmouth staff has the right to vote on whether to support the strike. If the stike is

approved, industrial action will begin this summer. John Craven the University ViceChancellor stated “I deplore any threat to the student experience, and perhaps particularly any action which would make life more difficult for students graduating this year - who already face a very unfriendly job market. Craven continued “UCU has put in a pay claim of 8% for this year which flies in the face of current restrictions on university funding and the likely effects of the recent budget on higher education budgets in future years. It is also a claim which is way out of line with the experience of people in the rest of the economy and which will gain no sympathy with other unions or the public more generally.” UCU general secretary, Sally Hunt, defended the threatened action: 'UCEA has indicated that up to 100 universities, around two-thirds of participating institutions, are looking to lose people and our own research indicates that the scale of job cuts is substantial" But the UCEA has criticised the UCU announcement for being outside of the agreed negotiating machinery. It says that the Union should have waited until the two groups had met for a second forum on national pay claims.

News » Local

News » Events

University of Portsmouth photography students are trying to raise £15,000 in order to showcase their final work at an exhibition later this year. The large amount of money they need to raise will help cover the costs for things such as gallery rent space, catalogues, and flyers. To kick-start their funding, photography students have been holding car boot sales to generate money. They will also be running for sponsors, from Eastney Swimming Baths to Clarence Pier on July 1st, wearing the university colours. Anyone is welcome to come along and watch.

The photography exhibit is to host a collection of finished work from final year students studying photography. The collection will see various types of photography, as each students’ work is completely separate and individual. Student Sam Evans said: “It’s the first time we as students are able to exhibit our work in a professional manner. It’s our showcase of the three years of hard work we have all put in. Hopefully by launching ourselves off in such a professional manner it will be a good launch pad for us all in our future.” For more information visit: brouhaha09.com

Sarah Morcom

In a bid to cut the number of burglaries, Portsmouth University students are being given free burglar alarms by Hampshire Police. If a window or door is forced open, the alarm, worth £1.30, will let out a high-pitched shriek. The University's campus service department are paying for 50 alarms, to be given to 25 households in Southsea. The 25 student homes, which are yet to be confirmed, will be picked from crime hot spots in and around Southsea by the University's police officer PC Fairbrother and three PCSO's.

Do you think link lecturers deserve the 8% wage increase? Email: comment@ upsu.net

UPSU Media

Exercise for exhibition Alarming idea Adrian Hales

"On a day when the sector has been asked by the treasury to make additional savings" said Jocelyn Prudence, UCEA Chief Executive, the UCU decision is "truly baffling". Two major university groups - the Russell Group and 1994 Group - put out a joint warning that they are “deeply worried at the prospect of disruption of student examinations this summer”. Steve Topazio the Education and Representation Officer at UPSU added to the debate that “The primary objective of the Students’ Union is the advancement of education and as such we have serious concerns with UCU’s threat of strike action. In the current economic climate, students’ are suffering both in the job market and the increasing amounts of debt that they are leaving University with. Because of this many students will see the 8% pay increase demand as greedy, and by holding students education to ransom over job cuts smacks of hypocrisy as many students will graduate jobless. I would therefore urge that the members of UCU to put the education of the students first and return to the negotiating table.”

This pilot scheme is part of Hampshire Constabulary's Operation Nemesis, aimed at reducing the number of burglaries and making students more aware of and less vulnerable to crime. If the trial proves successful, the University’s housing office has suggested that plans to buy hundreds more alarms exist. The eventual aim would be for the low cost alarms to be given to students for free when they move into private housing. Student houses are often targeted by criminals who are aware that student houses are rarely well secured and can contain thousands of pounds worth of possessions including student’s laptop.

Want to write for Pugwash News?

Pugwash News / Purple Wednesdays is the Union’s student newspaper. If you have something to shout about, from burning issues to match reports, comment to features, or you want to photograph, design or help lay it out, get in touch! For more information, see: upsu.net/p/2166

Pugwash News Wednesday 29th April 2009

News

Editors

Show me your Jalwa

Photo of the Fortnight

Jacob Leverett Editor pugwashnews@upsu.net

Tom West Comment & Opinion Editor comment@upsu.net

Peter Allsop Design Editor paperdesign@upsu.net

Elke Morice-Atkinson Life & Style Editor lifestyle@upsu.net

William Hobson Head of News news@upsu.net

Tallie Kane Arts & Entertainment Editor artsents@upsu.net

Laura Patricia Copy Editor copyeditor@upsu.net

Ben Endley Sports Editor sportnews@upsu.net

photo: Peter Allsop

Sub Editors News Matt Calmus & Henry Tipping

Arts & Entertainment Dominique O’Mahoney & Jack Kane

Life & Style Nina Tennant, Russell Thomas and Olugbenga Oyeniyi

Sports Chris Hewett Design Sophie Abbott

Contributors Alyson Bain, Johnny Bell, Caz Bird, Declan Coyle, Ian from ExPix, Marie Gomes, Adrian Hales, Steph Hall, Lucy Henry, Adam Insam, ‘Fresher Jack’. Laura Jones Mike ‘Mike Lowry’ Lowry, Andy Mew. Sarah Morcom, Gamel Oki, Jane O’Donohue, Liam Small, Adam Sunman, Ali Roff, and Tom Worman.

Universities Round Up Want to get involved and see your name on this list?

Varsity Cambridge

Gair Rhydd Cardiff

Want to get industry experience and boost your CV?

Research by Varsity has shown that 10% of students at the prestigious university have turned to drugs in a bit to help them with their studies. The survey by Varsity showed that the most popular were drugs such Modafinil, Ritalin and Adderall. The drugs were acquired without prescription making the possession and consumption illegal. The stimulants are proscribed to those with chronic sleep disorders although students are using the drugs as they are said to enhance concentration, prevent tiredness and strengthen alertness.

Student’s have complained that a lecturer at the university was “simply not very good at teaching”. Students are also blaming the lecturer for the incredibly bad pass rate. A mere 10 students out of 80 passed the second year computer science module. The Head of School emailed all students on the module stating that he had “considered the students’ problems and requests” The course rep noted that the particular member of staff is a “key researcher who brings a substantial amount of money to the department and the university”

Dates for the Diary

Redbrick Birmingham

Epigram Bristol

RAG Jail 29th May 8:30pm, Union

RAG Raid 4th May 12:00pm

Carnival 1st May 11:00am, Union/Ravelin Park

RAG-a-Muffin 5th May 12:00pm

Foam Party 1st May 8:00pm, Union

RAG Slave auction 6th May 10:00pm, Union

University of Birmingham’s Tennis Court Residents’ Association have broken a world record for the biggest Custard Pie fight. Over 190 students hurled more than 1,000 custard pies within a minute. Each pie thrower donated a minimum of £5 with a grand total of £1,300 being given to the BBC’s Comic Relief. For a pie throw to be counted, the pie has to six-and-a-half inches in diameter and made entirely from custard apart from a pastry base. Throwers were also only allowed to lob one pie at a time.

Economics, Finance and Management students at the University of Bristol have handed the university a demand for better education. The group of students claim that the education offered to them by the institution is simply not good enough. The students claim that they are being short changed by the university. Top-up fees were introduced in 2006 and the students demonstrate through success and satisfaction surveys that since this date the education on offer to this particular group of students has decreased.

Don’t just read Pugwash News, we need writers, photographers, designers, distributors and just enthusiastic people to help make Pugwash News for students by students! Email: pugwashnews@upsu.net

Pugwash News & Purple Wednesdays

Web

“Small Print”

Best of the Web

Produced fortnightly by the University of Portsmouth Students’ Union (UPSU). Printed by Quotemeprint - www. quotemeprint.com, 0845 130 0667, and printed on 100% recycled paper. Pugwash News & Purple Wednesdays bears no allegiance to any political party and discriminates against no-one.

To get in touch with the Pugwash News & Purple Wednesdays team, please visit upsu.net/newsdesk, e-mail us at newsdesk@upsu. net, call us via the Union’s Media & Publications Officer at: 023 9284 3657, or visit us at The Student Centre, Portsmouth Students’ Union, Cambridge Road, Portsmouth, Hampshire, PO1 2EF.

You can download back issues of Pugwash magazine and Pugwash News online at: pugwashnews.com

Errors & omissions: while we take every care to verify our content, we may occasionally make mistakes. Please contact us using the details above to report any inaccuracies or mistakes.

Stumble Upon stumbleupon.com/

The things you can be arrested for these days tinyurl.com/cjwes2

Cool beard hats (trust me just have a look) tinyurl.com/c4saq4

A collection of good innovative design toxel.com

Pugwash News Wednesday 29th April 2009

News

Election breaks records Tamil Tigers fighters in the of north Sri Lanka have declared a unilateral ceasefire with the Sri Lankan army. The UN are now using this an opportunity to take aid to thousands of refugees who have been caught up in the fighting.

A record number of University of Portsmouth students voted in this years election. The turn-out this year was up a staggering 30% on last years figures. The number also broke all recent records and continues an ongoing upwards trend. The UPSU annual elections, which select who will run the

Union next year, have come to a close with the new team being announced. The campaigns by all the candidates were passionately run, with candidates even braving the final day rain to catch the last few votes. The results

night itself is a fractious affair with the process of counting always taking lon-

ger than expected, leaving those mustered in the Union to being increasingly nervous. This year through upsu.tv over 200 students were able to watch the elections results live over the internet. upsu.net/elections

The United States have pledged to make up for ‘lost time’ in the battle against climate change. Barack Obama announced at a forum of the world’s biggest greenhouse gas polluters that the USA intend to be leaders in cutting their emissions.

Graham Norton who hosted the recent BAFTA awards managed to break two ribs after returning home from the ceremony and falling down a flight of stairs. The celebrity is now dosed up on painkillers but intends to still host the Eurovision song contest on 16th May, where he pledges to remain sober.

Madagascan security forces have stormed the country’s Constitutional Court and arrested the Head of Security after claims that he was attempting to destabilise the new presidents power. Assault rifles, pistols and grenades where found in his car as well.

A 57 year old women from Detroit avoided serious injury or death after she was shot. The women owes the miracle to her underwired bra. The bullet struck the underwire forcing it to slow down enough to save her from more serious injury.

The Spanish Navy have captured and arrested nine suspected Somali pirates. The nine arrested were accused of attacking the Italian cruise liner The Melody days earlier, the crew repelled the attack though by using high powered hoses on the armed pirates. US car giant General Motors is to cut an estimated 21,000 jobs as they write off the companies “Pontiac’ brand. GM has already been given over £19bn in loans by the US Government. A convicted sex offender and the leader of a pseudo-religious has escaped from prison on an island in the Indian Ocean after three of his supporters hijacked a helicopter forcing it to land at the prison before absconding with Juliano Verband. A replica of a 16th Century Chinese Junk has sunk after being hit by a freighter. The collision occurred as the vessel was one day away from completing a ten month journey from China to the US and back. The vessel was built to prove that journey was possible in the 16th Century.

News » RAG

A women is to be tried by jury at Newcastle Crown Court for having sex too loudly three times in ten days. Caroline Cartwright, 48, was accused of ‘moaning, groaning and her bed banging against the wall’ by her neighbours.

The new team, from left to right: Jacob Leverett (VP Communications), Beth Shephard (VP Welfare & Volunteering) Aakash Naik, (VP Societies) Oli Styles (VP Education & Representation) Elaina Sperring (VP Sports) and Steve Topazio (President)

Sarah Morcom

The 2009 Sabbatical elections had a record turnout - there was also a surprising number of changes to the ballot. Two candidates for next year’s sabbatical officers were disqualified from the competition. Carl Jackson and Rob Knott were running for VP Societies and VP Sports respectively. A third candidate, Tom Harrison, decided to withdraw from the elections due to personal commitments. Both Carl and Rob were excluded after breaking rules with their campaigning. Deputy returning officer, Joanna Dewen, said: ‘The UPSU can confirm that the UPSU Returning Officer received substantive complaints regarding the campaigning processes.’ She added: ‘These were upheld.

News » Theatre

The two candidates who were the subject of the complaints were excluded from the election’ Carl started his campaign before nominations had closed and would have been in breach of Point 6.1.1 of schedule 5 (The Rules for the Conduct of Elections) of the UPSU Constitution. This states ‘Candidates shall not permit the distribution of any publicity in support of their candidate prior to the time designated for the close of nomination.’ Rob Knott received publication from the nightclub Liquid which he says he didn’t ask for: ‘Liquid had printed their VIP bands with “Vote Rob Knott” printed on them, this is something that I did not ask for but as you can imagine in the heat of the moment it was very flattering and hard to say no to.’ Rob was told due to the publicity

he received at Liquid, he had access to 800 students which other candidates didn’t and the election must be a level playing field. He added: ‘As I was aware I did not need to say no to these because in theory every candidate could have also had this, although I didn’t ask for them it would only have taken each candidates own initiative to ask for them.’ When asked how we felt at being disqualified, Rob said: ‘Obviously I am gutted that I didn’t get to finish elections week and that I lost the chance to become VP Sport, especially as it was through actions of a third party outside of my control. ‘I would like to stress though that I think Elaina will do a fantastic job and is the ideal person to develop and progress sport at Portsmouth University, she has my support 110%’

A Serb union official chopped off his own finger and then ate it to protest over under paying and delays in paying staff at the textile factory where he represented workers. Zoran Bulatovic from Novi Pazar in Southwest Sebia cut his little finger of his left hand off with a hacksaw. He later told reporters that it “hurt like hell”. Fellow workers plan to negotiate more before taking such action Don’t expect anything nearly as drastic at upsu next year (Ed) A telecoms firm have pledged to expand mobile phone coverage at the top of Mount Everest. “A mobile tower at Gorak Shep will provide connectivity to climbers at the top” stated director of satellite services for Nepal Telecom

News » National

Rag Quiz

Uni Drama NUS President re-elected

Special RAG Quiz in the Waterhole on Sunday 3rd May Night. It will be £2 per person with £1 going to RAG (Raising and Giving) who are fundraising for local charities. Answers to questions will be available for £1 with a chance to double your points on a round of your choice for £2.50. We will be after donations as well for snacks on the night. Andy and Raj will be waxing their legs and are going to auction off the chance of pulling the strips off so make sure you come along. As well as that there will be the opportunity to pelt Andy with certain items on the night as he is put in some makeshift stocks.

Ambitious students at Portsmouth Uni have started up their own drama production company, La Vi Boheme. They are putting on their first show, “Politically Incorrect” on the 29th and 30th of May at Porchester Parish Hall. Tickets are just £5. The show is completely original, written, directed, managed and performed by themselves. It has adult content, and promises to be a zany night out. Please come along and support these brave people; the show starts at 7:30 pm. For more information, or to get involved in future productions, please contact: laviebohemeproductions@ hotmail.co.uk

William Hobson

The National Union of Students (NUS) re-elected Wes Streeting as President last month. Members at the annual conference in Blackpool voted for Streeting to serve a consecutive second term, with an overwhelming majority of 631 votes to 140. He began his first term in July 2008, taking over from Gemma Tumelty. “I have received the overwhelming mandate of 81% of delegates” said Streeting following his victory. “I relish the challenge that lies ahead. “This year ahead will be about fighting for a new deal for students one that combats, halts and reverses

the ‘marketisation’ of our education system”. Education & Representation Sabb for 2008, and future UPSU President, Steve Topazio said he believed that Streeting is “currently the best man for the job”, and his past leadership has put the NUS in “a place where it can effectively represent students across the country.” Steve encouraged the NUS to concentrate on opposing plans to increase the cap on tuition fees, and on representing the “grass root members”. “Just because Portsmouth is not as politically active as some Unions should not mean that the NUS doesn't engage with us.” Aaron Porter, VP for Higher Educa-

tion, was also re-elected for a second term. He will be joined in the NUS 'cabinet' by four new colleagues. The newly created positions of VP for Society & Citizenship, and VP for Union Development, were filled by Richard Budden and Susan Nash respectively. Shane Chowen and Ben Whittaker filled the existing positions of VP for Further Education and VP for Welfare. In his acceptance speech, Streeting promised that the NUS would “step up to the plate” when the government's university fees review for 2009 began. He pointed to the failings of the current system and said the NUS would promote a “fairer, equitable and sustainable alternative”.

Pugwash News Wednesday 29th April 2009

T t i s s c s i

t a t w g g w h a p t s I a l

b r d d b I s o t p â&#x20AC;&#x2DC; b i

t c o W o t b f W o t i p U

d p t t b

I l g s r A w i f t T t a b p i

Pugwash News Wednesday 29th April 2009

Comment & Opinion

Say something! Black tied

There's a time and a place for intellectual immaturity and ignorance, and it's more commonly known as primary school. By the time we all get to university, we should have grown out of concepts such as ignorance and racism, yet such things are still witnessed by Jane in our very own library computer suite.

I was in the computer room at the library when these two guys came in looking for a computer. They stood near the door looking around the room for about five minutes before one turned to the other and said: “It's no use, the whole place is full of Pakis.” The other guy said to him, “Pakis. Wish they'd all go back to curry land.” Then they both walked out. Neither of the two guys had tried to whisper what they'd said, and had just said it out loud. A few people turned, even the girl sitting at the help desk at the front, but no-one said anything. I didn't either, but I wish I had. The guys high-fived each other as they left, laughing about “curry land”. Oh, and they were Black. I’ve got nothing against anyone, but I thought that, being part of a racial group that’s suffered (and still does suffer) racism in some of its most disgusting forms, they'd have been a bit nicer to other ethnic minorities. It’s not a case of “oh, they’re all in the same boat so they'll understand each other", and I'm not stupid enough to think that Black people and Asian people think they're some kind of ‘brethren’ because they're not White, but come on. That was ignorance, racism and stupidity all rolled into one. I told a couple of friends, who said that they've heard and heard of racist comments all over the place. Whites on Blacks, Whites on Asians, Blacks on Whites, Asians on Orientals, Orientals on Whites... OK then, long story short, there are people from every ethnic background here that slag off people from every other ethnic background. What's the point? What does the colour of your skin have to do with anything? Then there's the places where it happens: not just in the library computer room, but in canteens, Halls, the Union and even in lectures. I think that's disgusting. I really do. I don't think that we can police people's thoughts, but then again I do think we have the right and the duty to turn around and start shouting at them because of how ignorant and stupid

they are. We've got thousands of students from other countries and different ethnic backgrounds studying here at the university, and they deserve the same respect we hope that they would show us. I don't know how much they contribute financially to the university and I don't care, because that's not really what matters. What matters is that they should have the right to study and exist without the stupid bigots being allowed to continue being here. I think that if they're caught, they should be chucked out without a second thought. I don't think that the University would care too much about losing a few thousand pounds worth of tuition fees in exchange for a good reputation, do you? Because what's that worth? It's priceless, really, isn't it? Another thing: I know that there are groups of students who meet to talk about their religion and their background and express Black or Asian pride or what have you, and I don't care about that; you can do what you want. But I have to say one thing. If we White students were to group together and form a group to celebrate our ethnic background, or for the English students to group together to celebrate St. George's Day, then we'd all get branded as racists or BNP supporters or something similarly stupid. See, there are preconceptions everywhere. It's got to the stage where people think that an expression of ethical or national pride is equal to an expression of racist thought. What are you on if you think that? This may not be the best country in the world, but it's my country and I'm proud of it. I'm also proud of the fact that anyone can be a part of it if they want to come and live or study here and that makes me feel more proud. All I ask is that people drop all of the stupidity and appreciate that racism comes from more than one angle and until we all get a handle on it and get rid of it this place isn't going to get any better, is it? As university students we should be mature enough to start taking a stand against it and try and do something to stop it. So if you hear something racist when you're around uni, stop and say something. Because I know that after what happened in the library I will be, and I'll be proud to do it. Jane O'Donohue

Graduation should be a time of nothing more than celebration, and occasional intoxication in the name of celebration. Well, its light has been dimmed a little for Tom by some very stupid old-fashioned rules being wheeled out in the name of social decency. You'll have to forgive me if I get a little excited about my graduation. It is, after all, the culmination of the past four years' worth of academic achievement. For which I receive a sheet of paper... Hmm. Anyway. I received the little booklet full of information about the ceremony, the ball and what have you, and after I read through it, a curious feeling of rage permeated my being. I'd read instructions on what I should wear to the ball and ceremony, based on nothing more than the business dangling between my legs. The ball was an event specified as “black tie” -

this gives women the freedom to wear anything from a cocktail dress to an evening gown, in a wild array of patterns and colours depending on what’s a la mode, yet will allow men to wear nothing more than a black suit and tie combination. I was also informed by the information leaflet that unsuitably attired students would be turned away from the event. What? So, let me get this straight - if I don't comply with some antiquated clothing convention dating from the nineteenth century, I'm to be prohibited from attending said ball? Nu-huh. I don't think so. The University expects me to get all dressed up for a ball being held in the Union? They're never going to be able to polish that particular turd enough in order to make it worth my while investing in some couture. As for the ceremony - the words "shirt" and "tie" were mentioned when talking about the suggested attire for male students, as if that's the only thing we're capable of looking respectable in, with the same threat of unsuitably attired stu-

dents being turned away. What complete and utter nonsense. In this day of varied fashion, for both sexes, we should look at modifying these out of date social rules and regulations and allowing people a little more freedom to express themselves with their clothes, especially men. We should be ‘allowed’ to wear more than a jacket and trousers to socalled formal events without the fear of being branded a deviant, or scruffy, or anything else people may come up with. It's about time that everyone, not just the University, took a look at how we're expected to dress and allow it to roll not only with the times a little more, but also our personal preferences. I know there are those who are perfectly happy in a three-piece suit or all trussed up with a cummerbund and all the power to them if that's what they feel comfortable in. All I'm asking for is the social freedom to wear what I feel comfortable in. Tom West

Planning ahead Most of us are finished the dreaded things - you know, the “D word” - but Steph is a 2nd year who’s just trying to get sorted for the future. There’s something lacking however. There comes a time at uni where you wonder why you are doing some things. For example, the Careers unit undertaken in 2nd year. Don’t get me wrong, it has been extremely helpful in helping me produce the portfolio submission of a CV and a covering letter (for a fake job application), and in preparing for the dreaded “D word” that we all know and love: dissertation. Yuck. (A friend tells me I’m swearing at him when I mention the word so for fear of offending anyone else, I shall refer to hereafter it as “D”.) I for one have absolutely no idea where the past 18 months have gone. Come back, all is forgiven! It seems ridiculous to think that back in March (when I had my year 3 options meeting), the lecturer was informing us of what our choices were for our final

year. Everyone in the theatre had a look of bewilderment, as if to say “oh, sugar”, to put it politely. Now it’s come to the stage where I'll have presented my proposal by the time you read this, and at the time of writing I feel extremely confused. As I stand now, I haven’t been told anything about what is expected of the proposal. I have no idea about the amount of research I’m expected to have done. No idea about the layout of the presentation. And no idea about what the hell I’m going to be asked. I hear my year three friends sayings things like Abstract, Discussion, Methodology; say what? This information has yet to be given to me so I’m going to have to take a chance and do it how I think it should be done... I think more needs to be done to prepare students for this task. People are getting more worried because of the unknown or unexpected. From an early stage, all these terms should be explained so we know exactly what to do. After all, no-one wants to lose marks for doing something incorrect. Perhaps lecturers should be asking students what they know about proposals and

the big D. Then they may realise that, quite simply, people don’t actually have a clue. Having said that, I’ve got into it a bit too much. Is it sad to actually get excited about a proposal? Not so much the proposal part, but the research into something that interests me. Something that I can get my teeth into and investigate. Will I be saying that this time next year? Possibly not, going by the reaction of most of my current third and fourth year friends, but until then, I’m just going to crack on and hope I have done it right! Steph Hall Laura is another 2nd year being subjected to the Careers unit, and she has her own opinion of the unit content. Personally, I feel patronised every time I attend Careers; they offer us such gems of advice as “research the job before you apply” - really, I’d never have thought of that one! What they don’t offer is what I actually need: advice on what my dissertation actually entails! LP

Life & Style » Education

Life & Style » Facts

An Englishman in France: Wilderness

You learn something new every fortnight

Johnny Bell

It has been a very long time since my last article, and for this I must apologise profusely. I’ve been encountering so many problems with my Halls of residence regarding Internet access. At one point the Internet stopped working simply because it was raining. I went to investigate, only to fobbed off with, “we don’t know, the technician is coming out tomorrow”. This seemed to be the only answer they would give me for three weeks, and just I was getting to the point of becoming a true Frenchman and was planning to go on strike by not paying my rent, when it magically started

working again. It was during those few weeks of little to no Internet access that I realised how much I rely on it: to contact friends and family, to sort out travel arrangements, to contact my department in Portsmouth to tell them what I’m up to. It actually scares me to think about what would happen to the world if all Internet communication was lost. In the meantime the weather has been slowly getting better and drier, thus allowing me to sit in the park and ‘study’ whilst the university is on strike. Ah yes, the strike. It has been going on for about eight weeks now and I’m still confused as to why they’re on strike, how long will it con-

tinue for and whether or not they will achieve their aims. I’ve asked some French students and they don’t even know what’s going on. To be honest, I’m getting a bit fed up of it now and can’t wait to return to a sense of normality, I’ve thoroughly enjoyed my time here but I think I’ve had my fill and can proudly say that I’ve survived nine months in France. Are you going on your placement year abroad in 2009/10? Do you want to share your experience? We’re currently looking for a new Englishman Abroad. If you’re interested in writing for us, please get in touch: pugwashnews@upsu.net

•

The Earth's rotation is actually slowing down - though only by a rate of 1.4 milliseconds a century. In 250 million years, when this adds up to a 25 hour day, maybe then you'll have enough time to get your coursework done!

•

Your eye muscles move an astonishing 100,000 times a day!

•

The most poisonous part of your body is your liver - the vitamin A there is extremely toxic if you ingest it directly. Hannibal Lector would have almost killed himself with a single adult liver of 1kg, though anyone brave enough to try polar bear liver would find

themselves dying within the hour. •

You can find out just how much radiation your phone is throwing at your skull at mobile-phonesuk.org.uk/sar.htm; try not be afraid.

•

Married people and other couples are 50% less likely to develop dementia than bachelor/ettes and divorcees, though widowers were the worst off, being six times as likely to suffer in later life.

•

40% of spam email goes to addresses that start with A, M, S, R or P.

Pugwash News Wednesday 29th April 2009

Life & Style

Sex with a cheating Smoking just isn’t ex: lack of fashionable anymore self-respect or the ultimate pleasure? We’ve all got exs. Whatever the reason for the breakup, they almost never just disappear off the face of the planet - you inevitably see them after, whether you want to or not. But should you have sex with them when you do? Here two different students, who’ve asked to remain anonymous for obvious reasons, give their views on the sex with an ex issue. Student A - Confidant: Nearly everyone has been there, with a partner who messes you about for a long time and then clears off with someone else. If you are one of the lucky ones they’ll be gone for good. If you are one of the not so lucky ones, then the ex will come sniffing back around like a dog on heat. I was not so lucky last week when my ex, on the pretence of bringing my things round, suggested we go for a drink. A few drinks later, he was whispering how much he loved me into my ear and how he would dump his new girlfriend at the weekend. I shall be perfectly clear right now and say that I knew full well that he had no intentions of getting rid of his new girlfriend, and also that I knew I was going to end up having sex with him that night. All the pleasure I got out of it came from knowing I had got one up on his new girlfriend - but clearly there is an issue of self-respect involved as well. However, can it be argued that the revenge outweighs this so-called lack of self-respect? A lot of people I have spoken to say it doesn’t. But at the end of the day, I did not lay down with delusions of love and commitment and, although the alcohol had obscured my judgement slightly, I was fully aware of what I was doing. I don’t feel used or abused or even think less of myself - why should I? Should I let the notion of lack of selfrespect that people are forcing on me get me down? Should I hide in my room shame-faced and crying over my past mistakes? No, I had sex with him one last time and I am moving on; leaving my ex in a state of fear that

Olugbenga Samuel Oyeniyi

I will tell his girlfriend, and leaving her not knowing she is with a cheating rat. People say that shagging your ex when it is clear he or she is only using you will get you down and even damage how you view yourself, but it hasn’t for me. I’m not trying to advocate sleeping around, but in my opinion, a little bit of revenge sex can do wonders for the disposition. Student B - Not so confident: I too have had a run-in with an ex (the kind where you go and see them for a ‘chat’ after the break up, but don’t end up chatting at all). It didn’t make me feel like I had moved on, and I didn’t feel like I had gained anything from the experience. In fact, it made me feel like I had taken a big fat belly flop backwards, and I walked home afterwards wishing I had never gone to ‘chat’ with him. The issue of self-respect within sex and relationships is a tricky one to navigate. It really does depend on how much confidence you have in yourself and, unlike the experience above, I lost confidence by doing what I did. It didn’t do wonders for my disposition, but instead made me feel horrible and low in myself. Sex with an ex has a catchy ring to it, but that’s just the thing – it can be catching. You can get trapped in it. iVillage, one of the many women’s Life & Style websites out there, notes it as number one in its ‘Seven Deadly Dating Sins’. (Number two is never take naked pictures). iVillage states that sex with an ex is playing with fire on too many levels for it ever to be the truly right thing to do. But then again, the right thing to do for one person is never the same for another. Samantha Jones from Sex and the City summed it all up when she said: “Sex with an ex can be depressing. If it’s good, you can’t get it anymore. If it’s bad, you just had sex with an ex.” How can you really determine if it was bad or good? I mean, I’m sure we can all work out if the sex itself was bad or good, but what about the

Smoking used to be associated with glamour and success in the past. Tobacco companies even paid millions of dollars to 1930s and 40s Hollywood Alisters such as Clarke Gable and John Wayne to endorse particular cigarette brands. Davidoff Cigarettes, a German cigarette company, collaborated with Belvedere Vodka to promote their cigarettes on the bar, and used scantily clad promotional girls to hand out free packs of cigarettes to customers. Today it’s a very different story. Smoking is seen as anti-social and the nicotine-addicted are relegated to the dirty pavements outside clubs, pubs and even their own homes. About 106,000 people in the UK die each year due to smoking. Many deaths are due to cancers, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and heart disease. Putting it another way, about 8 out of 10 non-smokers in the UK live past the age of 70, but only about half of long-term smokers live past that age. The younger you are when you start smoking, the more likely you are to smoke for longer and to suffer an early death. Many smokers say they feel like social pariahs, and this was the case even before the smoking ban came into effect. Yet smoking hasn’t been

socially acceptable for a long time in the UK. The latest government initiative to drive the “smoking kills” message home is the most hard hitting yet. Gruesome pictures depicting smoking-related illnesses (the most repulsive being an image of a man with cancer growing outside his throat) will adorn every cigarette pack by October this year. Campaigners should be hopeful about the effect the images will have. Canada launched similar photo warnings in 2001, and 31% of ex-smokers said it helped them to quit. But the picture alone won’t do unless there is a personal motivation to stop. Moreover, in a bid to save further generations from cigarettes, awareness campaigns are also being presented in schools. Hopefully they will be enough to stop a teenager from taking their first drag. Most people take up smoking when they are teenagers, purely from peer pressure, which is a tough force to beat. Many boys and girls smoke in their high schools and colleges. They think it is fashionable, that they would be able to attract the opposite sex by smoking. But they probably never thought about how they actually looked and smelt while they were doing it. We often hear of adult smokers

Got a relationships story to tell? E-mail us in confidence on: lifestyle@upsu.net actual event – the fact that you just had sex with an ex? How do you know if that was a good thing or bad thing to do?

It all depends on your motives, how sure you are of yourself and whether or not you are able to handle it. I’m not sure what I was trying to

saying, in light of all the research and warnings, something like “If only I’d know how dangerous that first cigarette was.” Yet the young still take it up. They may start smoking for a multitude of reasons. But they continue to smoke cigarettes because they become addicted, or this process becomes a ritual - this is the same reason why adults smoke. Some people even consciously or subconsciously measure their lives in cigarettes. Even with the social stigma smoking comes with today, British American Tobacco was planning to launch a controversial ‘safer cigarette’, designed to cut the risk of smoking-related diseases such as cancer and heart failure by up to 90%. The release of such a cigarette is sure to infuriate anti-smoking groups. Smoking is just not fashionable anymore. It stains teeth, sours breath, ages skin and will kill you. I personally can’t stop people from smoking if they want to - just don’t do it near my smoke free lungs. The disadvantages of smoking cannot be overestimated or over emphasised. There will never be a way of escape, other than quitting smoking permanently. If you are concerned about your health from smoking, or want to give up, contact the NHS on their ‘Free Smoking’ helpline: 0800 022 4 332.

achieve by ‘chatting’ to my ex so many times after the break up – but I can tell you what I wasn’t achieving (and no, I’m not talking about orgasms). I wasn’t moving on or regaining my confidence after the breakup. My Mum asked me why I didn’t get another boyfriend for a while after the big ex. I replied that I needed to like myself as an entirely happy single person before anyone else would like me. I was single for absolutely ages before I met anyone else and I really didn’t care. Granted, I have been in a new relationship for just over a year now (so I’m probably sitting on my moral high horse a bit), but it just needs to be said that we should all remember that once the sex is over and we go home, we’re all we’ve got. Don’t ever lose your self-respect. It’s much more important than a dancing duvet.

Life & Style » Review

Life & Style reviews... Ha Ha Bar Tom West

A stylishly modern exterior on Gunwharf's waterfront gives way to a modern (and surprisingly comfortable) interior - a large, open bar under a rather large mirror which allows you to have a look at what the bar staff are doing to your drinks as you wait for them to be served. Seating for eating arrangements is equally modern, though not as comfortable; the open-plan design of the restaurant allows drinkers to snoop on whatever entrée you've chosen on their way to the clean, well lit facilities, and then once again at your main course on their way back to the bar. Not that you

would eat that fast, of course! Each of the choices on the menu deserves time and care in its consumption. Whilst not vast, all of the items on the menu appeared to be good value for money and what I ordered certainly was, coming in what I believe to be generous portions. A delicious starter of pan-fried goat's cheese (£4.95) was delicious, thanks to a lovely husky aroma and creamy texture, despite missing the onion marmalade it was supposed to come with according to the menu. Due to the company of the person with whom I was, I didn't get the chance to interrogate the waiter about this. Mind you, I doubt I would have had the chance to, had I been allowed to - I laid eyes on the man

only four times during the course of the entire evening. Whether or not it was mere understaffing, and he was busy with jobs elsewhere, or simply choosing to ignore us a little, I felt as if we didn't receive the attention we deserved during our evening there. Service aside it was a good evening. The pleasant starter was followed up with their yellow fin tuna loin (£12.45), which was curiously missing certain components in the same manner as its predecessor. Green beans, chilli and broccoli - check. Pesto, spring onions and spinach - erm, not check. Had they run out of the listed accompaniments to this dish or had the chef been haphazard in his preparation? I fear I shall

never know... *wipes away a tear* The saving grace of this dish was that the portion of tuna was indeed generous. Had it been anything less than the wondrous fish brick (I can think of no other way to put it) that had been placed on the plate before me, I would have felt cheated out of the money I'd be expected to pay for that course at the end of the meal. The evening's proceedings were washed down with a bottle of pinot grigio (£15.95 per bottle), which was indeed fruity and refreshing, and complimented the fish extremely well. Not bad for something that was chosen because it was the cheapest wine that they had in stock, eh? “What about pudding?”, I hear you

cry? Well, I was not allowed to have pudding. Don't worry, I exacted my revenge on my fellow diner in the most horrid of ways later on. I'd go back again, if only to watch the people at the bar's faces as they watched me stuff mine. The looks I was getting were either jealousy or disgust, I have no idea which... I give Ha Ha Bar 3/5, losing points for the list of ‘missings’. Missing ingredients, missing staff and missing privacy all missed the mark, Ha Ha bar was saved by the portion size. View the menu and find out more at hahaonline.co.uk

Pugwash News Wednesday 29th April 2009

Life & Style

Guide to: 2009 Summer Festivals Great Escape

Relentless NASS Reading Festival

WHERE & WHEN: Brighton - 14th - 16th May

WHERE & WHEN: The Bath and West Showground, Somerset - 10th - 12th July

WHY: Now in it’s fourth year, The Great Escape showcases the world’s most vibrant and exciting new bands over three days, and 34 venues. This festival is known for picking up on bands who go on to be huge, so if you’re into new music and want to know who’s tipped for the top (as well as seeing some firmly established acts), get down to The Great Escape. They also run a music convention for industry professionals.

Summer Break

Eden Sessions

WHERE & WHEN: Newquay - throughout June

WHERE: The Eden Project, Nr St Austel

WHY: This student focused festival takes place throughout June, so you choose one week during June that suits you. Summer Break is a mini package style festival, with camping/caravanning options, and entertainment and music taking place at venues in Newquay and Tolcarne Beach with camping at Trevelgue Holiday Park. Forget Summer Balls, this is the ultimate summer student experience!

WHY: The Eden Sessions have become one of the highlights of the summer music calendar in the South West, attracting some of the biggest names in music down to perform amongst the spectacular setting of the biomes. From Amy Winehouse to the Pet Shop Boys, the lline up has always been top notch. Oasis will also play a session on 14 July (rescheduled date from last September which is, obviously, sold out).

WHO: Pendulum DJ’s & MC Jakes, Scott Mills, Judge Jules, Mistajam, Jaguar Skills, Scratch Perverts & Dynamite MC, London Elektricity and Urban Knights AV.

HOW MUCH: Camping ticket £59, Caravanning ticket £99.

WEB:

WHO: Kasabian, Passion Pit, British Sea Power, Little Boots, The Big Pink, The Maccabees, Metronomy, Esser, White Denim, School Of Seven Bells, Chairlift, James Yuill, Future of The Left, Boxer Rebellion, The Mae Shi, Abe Vigoda, Dm Stith, We Were Promised Jet Packs, The Xx, Hot Silk Pockets, Casiokids, Ulterior, Micachu and The Shapes, It Hugs Back, Noah and The Whale, Patrick Wolf, Brakes Skint And Demoralised, Trailer Trash Tracy’s, Dan Black, The New Wine, Ou Est Le Swimming Pool, Marina And The Diamonds, Rosie and the Goldbug and loads more.

WHY: The event features the best in action sports including skateboarding, BMX, freestyle moto x, parkour, roller derby, mountain biking and inline skating as well as a world class music bill over the three days, with a capacity of 15,000 and arenas both indoor and out. This year there will also be a public park so everyone can get stuck in regardless of ability. The Relentless BMX Dirt Championships are also due to be held at NASS, and the dirt track is larger than ever this year. It’s going to be a rush! WHO: NERD, Scratch Perverts, High Contrast, Shy FX, Chase & Status, Tinchy Stryder, The Nextmen, Sub Focus, Chipmunk, Freestylers, Jaguar Skills HOW MUCH: Adult weekend with camping £64.99, Child weekend with camping £34.99, Family weekend with camping £40. WEB:

relentlessnass.com

WHERE & WHEN: Reading - 28th - 30th August

WHY: The Reading and Leeds Festivals are a pair of annual music festivals that take place in Reading and Leeds. Between 1998 and 2007 the dual festivals were known officially as the “Carling Weekend” until parting ways with their sponsor Carling in November 2007. Reading festival has had various musical phases, as detailed below. In the twin-site era, rock, alternative, indie, punk and metal have tended to dominate.

WHO: Kings of Leon, Kaiser Chiefs, Placebo, Fall Out Boy, Deftones, Funeral For A Friend, Arctic Monkeys, The Prodigy, Maximo Park, Ian Brown, Glasvegas, The Maccabees, Radiohead, Bloc Party, Yeah Yeah Yeahs

HOW MUCH: SOLD OUT - although you can still find some earlybird coach packages available WEB:

readingfestival.com

HOW MUCH: £45, Delegate tickets £150 (allows entry to all TGE events and the music convention events) WEB:

greatescape.com

WHO: 4 July – Kasabian, 9 July – Razorlight, 18 July – The Kooks HOW MUCH: £35 per session WEB:

edensessions.com

summerbreak.com

We’ve got 4 Camping Tickets to Summer Break to give away. To win e-mail the words ‘Summer Break’ to competition@upsu.net

We’ve got 4 Camping Tickets to Relentless NASS to give away. To win e-mail the words ‘Relentless NASS’ to competition@upsu.net

Pugwash News Wednesday 29th April 2009

Life & Style

Isle of Wight WHERE: Isle of Wight - 12th - 14th June WHY: The festival has a large main stage in a natural amphitheatre that showcases well known rock and indie names, a legendary act or two, and rising stars, in a relaxed festival atmosphere. Expected to make a return in 2009 is the 5,000 capacity circus style Big Top which plays host to a campers and Festival First Members only special night on the Thursday, and acts as a second stage once the festival begins. Away from the Main Stage, the Platform One Bandstand offering unsigned acts and local bands, around 50 acts in all. WHO: The Prodigy who headline on Friday, with Stereophonics, and Razorlight confirmed as joint Saturday headliners, and Neil Young headlining the Sunday. Basement Jaxx, Pendulum, Maximo Park, White Lies, The View, The Rifles, Pixies, Simple Minds, The Pigeon Detectives, and The Script are just some of the names confirmed to appear on the main stage.

Boardmasters

Creamfields

Glade

Bestival

WHERE: Newquay - 5th - 9th August

WHERE: Cheshire - 29th - 30th August

WHERE: Winchester - 16th - 19th May

WHERE: Isle of Wight - 11th - 13th September

WHY: Newquay, the home of British surfing, plays host to the ultimate surf, skate, sun, sea and music festival. The 5 s t a r World Qualifying Series surf competition takes place as part of the festival, and with a $100,000 prize purse up for grabs you’ll see some of the best surfers in the world battling it out in the waves at Fistral. This year’s sponsors, energy drink Relentless, are no strangers to extreme sports, which is proven by the Relentless Aerial Assault tow-in surf sessions. The event is also sponsored by skatewear legends Vans, so expect some awesome displays at the skate park from both skaters and bmxers with $30,000 in prize money up for grabs over vert, street and mini ramp events. In addition to all the events and contests, the two day music festival (formerly known as Unleashed) that takes place in the amazing setting at the top of the cliffs at Watergate Bay and the Beach Sessions down at Fistral Beach bring some of the UK’s hottest musical talent down to Newquay. VIP tickets are available so you can experience the festival in style.

WHY: Now in it’s 12th year, Creamfields is established as one of the best dance music festivals in the UK. It kicked off in 1998, and in setting out to provide the clubbing world with a bespoke large scale outdoor event it has gone on to become the most popular and renowned open air electronic music festival in the world. Famous for bringing together genre breaking pioneers from across the DJ and live music spectrum, the structure of the festival features the enormously successful Live Outdoor Stage and between 8-10 DJ only arenas. Creamfields is the only festival to have been successfully exploited on the global scene, with Creamfields Ireland, Spain, Brazil, Mexico, Poland and Argentina amongst many more.

WHY: Visit the Healing Field to chill out, there’s an arena called Vapor which will be hosted by the Bloc Festival team, a circus and cabaret bar and the eternally intriguing Rabbit Hole. Glade started off as the renegade dance area at Glastonbury and has morphed into a hugely successful festival in its own right.

WHY: 2009 is the Year Of The Spectacular at Rob Da Bank’s Bestival. The theme for fancy dress is outer space, and one of the highlights will be the pyrotechnic wonders of Blastival, and The Afterburner, a firey spectacle unfolding over three nights. Not to mention the many different arenas, entertainments, and general Bestival-y goings on that will keep you entertained, the musical treats lined up are particularly out of this world for Bestival 09

WHO: Tiesto, David Guetta, Pete Tong, High Contrast, Chase & Status, MC Dynamite, Basement Jaxx, Paul van Dyk, Dizzie Rascal, Calvin Harris Live, Sasha, Annie Mac, Judge Jules, Dirty Vegas Live and so much more...

WEB:

WHO: The Streets will headline on Friday 7th August and the mighty and legendary Cypress Hill will headline on Saturday 8th August. Latest announcement includes a perfectly mixed blend of sounds including Calvin Harris and Roots Manuva

creamfields.com

HOW MUCH: £120 adult no camping, £60 child (12 and under), £140 with camping

HOW MUCH: Charger ticket (entry to all ticketed events) £89, Weekend Watergate Bay ticket £54.99 (two day entry to music festival), One day music festival ticket £29.99

WEB:

isleofwightfestival.com

WHO: Underworld, Booka Shade, Freeland, Femi Kuti, Dub Pistols, Antix, Plump DJs, Krafty Kuts, Rennie Pilgrem, Los Albertos HOW MUCH: Adult £125 (£100 NUS), Campervan and Caravan Ticket £45, gladefestival.com

WHO: Soulwax, 2ManyDJs, Kraftwerk, Massive Attack, MGMT, Fleet Foxes, Seasick Steve, Klaxons, Bat For Lashes, The Beat, Squarepusher, Friendly Fires, Fujiya & Miyagi, Metronomy, Dub Pistols, 65 Days of Static, Annie Mac, DJ Youda, Friction, Taylo, Beardyman, Rob Da Bank, Gilles Peterson, DJ Derek, Johnno (Bugged Out), Kitty, Daisy and Lewis, It Hugs Back, VV Brown, with more to be announced. HOW MUCH: Adult weekend tickets £140, Child weekend tickets £70

HOW MUCH: Early bird weekend camping ticket £115, Early bird weekend ticket, £105

WEB:

bestival.net

WEB:

relentlessboardmasters.com

We’ve got 4 Weekend Tickets to the Boardmasters to give away. To win e-mail the words ‘Boardmasters’ to competition@upsu.net

THE RUMOUR MILL DJ’s from this festival could be playing at the Grad Ball!

We’ve got 2 Tickets to Bestival to give away.

win fill out the annual Survey online at: IN To upsu.net/annualsurvey from 11th May.

Pugwash News Wednesday 29th April 2009

Life & Style

Festivals Essentials Pugwash News gives you our essential guide to Festival Fashion, hygiene and all those essential bits to cram into your backpack before heading off to soak up the sun and music this summer!

hand crank or by solar power. Eliminating the need for batteries 1 minute of winding the torch is enough to provide ultra bright light for 30 minutes!

Headwear The Newurban Paper Cowboy Hat is made from paper yarn (a softer alternative to natural straw) with a matching vinyl headband. Colourful, lightweight and fun! Made from 100% Paper. This funky headwear comes in a choice of 3 different colour themes yeeehaaaahh!

This waterproof housing for mobile phones from Boxit looks like it could provide the necessary protection from the elements for your phone, small GPS or iPod whilst your out and about. What’s more we’ve spotted a competition where you can actually win one!

Hygiene A new personal hygiene kit - PatientPak - that includes a proven patented formula developed by medical doctors and which has only been available in hospitals to date, has been created to provide a breakthrough in the battle against superbugs, viruses and bacteria. This excellent pack contains everything you may need - the best defence against infection is good hygiene!

From £8.99 at play.com Being dirty is not where it’s at. That’s why showers were invented. Unfortunately, unless you’re into freezing your bits off, showers require power. And that means you can’t have a nice hot shower when you’re stuck in the middle of the wilderness. Step forward the ingenious Super Solar Shower. This incredibly useful, eco-friendly shower system has been specifically designed for those moments when you want a shower but you’re miles from power.

£24.47 from newurban.co.uk Another masterpiece from Newurban - a Ribbon Wide Brim Hat which has a huge 14cm (5.5 inch) drop down brim that can be shaped up or down. Perfect for the beach or by the pool. Can easily be folded into a beach bag or luggage. £20 from firebox.com A cheap, universal, portable charger able to charge up to three devices at once. If you don’t have juice, you don’t know jack!

Win it from ExPix.co.uk or £21.50 from boxit.net Basically a giant 3-man water bomb catapult - had us all fondly reminiscing about those fun-filled summer days of our childhoods. Many happy days were spent chasing each other round the garden with bottles of water and water pistols, before the arrival of the water bomb brought a whole new look to our armoury! However, we remembered that as soon as our ‘enemy’ got more than 20 yards away they were in no more danger of being hit than a bullseye at a blindman’s archery competition!! If only we’d had access to the WildSling! Capable of launching water bombs a distance of over 300 feet (although we are sure we have sent them further!!), the WildSling is the ultimate toy for a hot summer day! To launch your water bomb, two of you need to hold the sling’s handles at shoulder level, while the third holds the ammo pouch at ground level. Release your grip on the pouch and hey presto - the bomb soars into the air before giving a satisfying splat on your target!

£23.50 from um-brellas.co.uk

£15.65 from Boots

Clothing We’re not sure why, exactly, but we really want to wear this t-shirt to a festival. It just seems right, you know?

£24 from fly53.com You can’t go wrong with a pair of classic Hunters – these golden beauties will probably repel mud, they’re so bloomin’ awesome.

Gadgets £25 from juicejack.com

£12.95 from prezzybox.co

The company claims no two of these ultra cool patch work fleeces are ever the same. Festivals can get pretty bloody cold at night and we’d recommend wrapping up in something warm and joining the hippy vibe!

£55 from tinyurl.com/d4g5a3

£29.99 from newurban.co.uk

This fantastic multi function torch includes an LED torch, a lamp, an emergency siren, an AM/FM radio and can be charged anywhere using either the

These luxury brollies are made by Cornwall based company Um… which was set up in 2008 by Tricia Stubberfi eld after she felt like traditional umbrellas were a bit dull. Her designs featuring scribbly illustrations screen printed onto quality canopies. Handy for spending the day staking out that spot at the front of the stage.

£42.95 at wellywarehouse.co.uk

And of course, we cannot forget the obligatory fancy dress. From full bondage wear through to Banana Man you’re likely to see it all at this summers festivals. Let your imagination be your only limit, this is probably one of the only opportunities when you’ll be everyone’s friend for dressing up!

Pugwash News Wednesday 29th April 2009

Arts & Entertainment

Singles Bonkers - Dizzee Rascal

Gigs 4/5

The country’s favourite Rascal returns with his latest club banger that is making everyone just go “Bonkers!”. Set to become yet another party classic, Dizzee keeps up with the times, experimenting with an electro and house sound, that will leave the speakers pumping and the windows shaking. After collaborations with the likes of the Arctic Monkeys, Shy FX, Bun B, Lily Allen and most recently Calvin Harris, we can only describe Dizzee as versatile. And once more Dizzee flaunts his talent as a no nonsense MC, with his rough and raw verses thrown over this dirty backing track, in what sounds like a studio freestyle with Daft Punk. In that sense it is similar in production to how he would have MC’d when he first started rapping over jungle beats at raves. Vocally the song is instantly recognisable as Dizzee, and sounds most similar to the hit “Sirens”. Stylistically it is probably the most different song we have heard from Dizzee in a while, due to focus on the bassline instead of the lyrics. Like “Dance Wiv Me” which one NME’s Best DanceFloor Filler of 2008, Dizzee has produced yet another great club tune. Again Dizzee shows the experimental and evolving nature of his style that has characterised his success in recent years. Personality and quality are the two things that have stayed constant throughout his success and that is why he remains the undisputed King of UK urban music. Jack Kane

“Audience of One” – Rise Against

1/5

I feel like such an old man when these new American bands get talked about around my social groups. They’re all a bit of fun right? Here’s a band with some interesting views on the world; well with a name like “Rise Against” you can expect some kind of cutting social commentary. This new single “Audience of One” plays like a tired song. The tune is too predictable and progression through the song just seems like a boring and mundane affair. It tends to follow the pattern of bands today that write the same paint by numbers material that all ends up sounding the same, almost blurring together like a large unoriginal blob. “Nickelback”, I’m looking at you when I say this. I admit, that this isn’t my main choice of music, but I’ve heard some great material from this band, so it’s a bit sad to see an act that showed a bit of promise go down the same dull path that has consumed other young acts in the past. “Green Day” and “Offspring” are fine examples. Are they trying a more radio friendly approach to spread their message, or have they just run out of ideas and can’t help but write songs, no matter how sleep inducing they may be? Hopefully, this will just be the cashing in single that helps the sale of an album with an impressive track listing, but that’s unlikely. William Preston

“On and On” - The Answer

4/5

Alerting you with a guitar ringing out, already you know that this track is going to end rocky. It starts pretty rocky too. Think of that AC/DC style of rock and I probably don’t have to go on about how the song sounds, but that would be boring. It seems that there is an uprising of these rock reviving rebels keeping the dying genre of old school hard rock riding round the highway to hell. Bands like “Airbourne” and “Wolfmother” see no shame in playing a style of music that is listened to by many of our dads. Age debate aside, the sound is coming back and “The Answer” are bursting out of your speaker’s telling you that rock has never died. It’s hard not too believe; this is the liveliest sound today. So much screaming soul and gritty guitaring make this a perfect song to put on repeat whilst doing something vaguely exciting and rebellious. It’s about time some music with a bit of testosterone came back into the scene after hearing such dull music recently. I couldn’t imagine “Coldplay” or “Arctic Monkeys” coming up with an energetically rocking tune. The drums are tight, the vocals grab you by the ear drums and the guitaring leaves you bobbing your head like nodding like it’s trying to remove itself from your shoulders. “The Answer” have brought proof that the rock resurrection is upon us. William Preston

Arts & Ents Stereo Here at Arts & Ent’s HQ, we got bored of Internet generated charts, so we decided to put a playlist together of our own. We asked our contributors to give us the track they are listening to most this fortnight, so we can share it with you; get listening! Jack Kane : Chase & Status with Plan B - Pieces William Preston : Radiohead - Optimistic Tallie Kane : The Pains of being Pure at Heart - Young Adult Friction Dominique O’Mahoney : Air Traffic - Ambulate

Lily Allen

James Morrison

Alyson Bain

Portsmouth Guildhall

Two albums worth of material should have produced a longer show than the hour and ten minutes the fans received, but sometimes quality outweighs quantity. It certainly seemed to in this case, although there were a few grumbles at the briefness of the appearance. Lily took to the stage in a skin tight mini dress and killer sparkly heels. After a somewhat shaky start the 23 year old adjusted her ear piece and was back on form. Tracks from her new album ‘It’s Not Me, It’s You’ went down well, but it seemed like the older material from her debut album ‘Alright Still’ went down the best with the crowd. Old favourites like LDN, Smile and Littlest Things being most memorable. Lily surprised us with a few lines from her collaboration with Mark Ronson, and a rendition of Dizzee Rascal’s ‘Dance Wiv Me’. Before long it was encore time, and Lily re-appeared in a far more relaxed

Alyson Bain

James Morrison to me is a bit like Marmite.... in a love/hate kind of way... the fans that packed out the Portsmouth Guildhall clearly loved him! there were banners and flags, along with offers of marriage shouted out as the shy looking man entered the stage after a short build up. Showcasing songs from both his albums, 2006’s ‘Undiscovered’ and, released last year, ‘Songs for you, Truths for me’ Morrison had the crowd eating out of his hand from the offset. His unique voice filled the Guildhall, as hit after hit rolled out, all greeted with screams and applause. James appears next along the South coast on 7th April, at the Bournemouth International Centre.

Show of the fortnight

Drum and bass sessions is presented by DJs Lych + Bate. It is every Thursday 7-9pm on purefm.com and provides new and old drum and bass. It covers the complete genre by playing tunes from a lot of different artists. There are album reviews, music reviews, guest DJs, guest mixes and information on up and coming drum and bass events in the area. They have also promoted and put on their own nights in association with the drum and bass society.

EP Start of Something EP - Stone Gods Rating:

William Preston It’s been a long time since “The Darkness” faded off into the rock backdrop, leaving a trail of annoyingly catchy hits and images of a naked Justin Hawkins burned into our memory. If

“Scream” – Chris Cornell Rating:

William Preston With a music career spanning two big bands over two decades, Chris Cornell is well known around the music scene, fronting the rock giants “Soundgarden” and “Audioslave”. He furthered his exposure by providing the powerful theme for the recent Bond film “Casino Royal”. Things are

you remember that Justin was joined by his brother Dan in the band, you may also remember that after the split, Dan went off with the other members to form the rock outfit “Stone Gods”. Justin on the other hand has tried the same formula again with “Hot Leg”, but that’s a review for another time. Anyway, back to “Stone Gods”. Distancing them from the glam rock image that made “The Darkness” the butt of a few jokes, Dan’s new band have just about established their new sound, like a flag on the music scene. Sounding like a raw “Def Leppard”

with a punk edge, it’s not hard to like their new EP “Start of Something”. Uplifting and driving, the title song follows the typical power ballad pattern that has worked for a lot of bands in the past. Whilst not being as rocky as their previous efforts, this song still does the job of making you sway along. Included in the EP, there are chilled acoustic versions of 3 songs from their debut album. A nice little taster that will keep you going until the next album.

going to keep getting bigger and better, it would seem. Not only were my assumptions wrong, but my hopes had been deflated and defiled, and later slapped around my tearful face a number of times. The bullet that shot down what faith I had for Cornell’s future came in the form of “Scream”; a joint misadventure with R&B star “Timbaland”. By now, you should be familiar with the robotic ditty “Part of Me”, the monotonous single. The album opens with its most well known song and gets worse from there, sowing a trail of dreary electronic boredom along its way. As hard as it is for me to express this without convulsing violently, Cornell’s voice does suit the

R&B genre uncomfortably well. His bluesy grind eases the pain slightly, but can’t distract you enough from the depths of hell the music is dragging him to. Despite a couple of tracks that are average at best, the only real redeeming feature about this album is hearing Chris’s soothing vocals. Hopefully this will just be forgettable detour rather than a future path, or perhaps the cue for “Soundgarden” to regroup. “Scream” is the musical equivalent of missing your bus on the way to work and having to walk 5 miles in heavy rain. If there is justice in the world, a black hole sun would come and wash away the pain that this album has caused.

chard Curtis’s new comedy about the fictional pirate radio station “Radio Rock” based on a ship in the middle of the North Sea. This being a period of time when the BBC was heavily restricted on playing rock music, it was the pirate radio stations that provided the publics need for this naughty music. Enough with the history lesson and back to the film. “Radio Rock” is populated by the usual balance of Curtis-esque middle class characters, each with their token traits, except this time around, they are all radio DJ’s. Their almost illegal broadcasts are set to be shut down by Kenneth

Branagh (playing his evil role much like a panto villain) leading much of the film to be intercut with stages in his attempts. The general pace of the film is unsteady, with plot holes carelessly scattered throughout and the film seems to lose direction in the middle. Some of the jokes felt painfully unoriginal, leaving some fine actors with almost nothing to work with. There were a few good laughs, but spread thinly. Not even a terrific cast (featuring Bill Nighy and Nick Frost) and a great soundtrack could save a promising premise from becoming a bland comedy.

Film The Boat That Rocked Rating:

William Preston Ah the Sixties; the only time it was cool to be British and rock music truly rocked. So making a light-hearted music comedy based in this time period is going to be a winner, right? Well, yes and no. ‘The Boat That Rocked’ is Ri-

Pugwash News Wednesday 29th April 2009

Sports

Cheerleading place well at nationals Marie Gomes

Portsmouth Phoenix made an impressive return to competitive action over the Easter weekend at our 3 day BCA Competition. Despite some of us still recovering from tour, this suffering was perhaps eased by the fact that Cheerleading were the only club to fly back. However we all managed to get to training on Thursday night for last minute touch-ups and a pep talk. We did have one little hiccup, with a Partner Stunt girl falling from extension, so we had no idea how that stunt was going to go the next day. We met at stupid o’clock in the morning, only to be greeted by a drunk Irishman who proceeded to tell us his life story of being a model, TV presenter and dancer... Then we saw him dance and drove away as quick as we could. An interesting start to a 4am day and hopefully not an omen of things to come. We arrived in Telford around 8, where the hoards of Cheerleaders were piling into the International Centre. All of Partner Stunt were ready as they were on at ten, so whilst they went to warm up everyone else started putting their slap on. Partner Stunt went really well, as

this time they only missed one stunt out instead of three, all their hard work paid off and no-one dropped their stunt. Only a few hours later, we were all done up and warming up having our practise time. Before we knew it we were next on. Unfortunately it didn’t go as well as we had expected, but it was only little mistakes that could be easily amended the next day. With the squad having mixed feelings about how we did, it was time to go and sit down for the awards. We all huddled together waiting for the results of Partner Stunt who came 1st! Everyone was jumping and screaming as they went and collected their trophy. Luckily Claudia didn’t cry this time! Then it was onto Cheer, with 6 trophies to be given out and a lot more than 6 good squads in the line up. The tension was immense as Ivan counted down the trophies as we knew if we hadn’t been called out by 3rd place we wouldn’t have won anything. But to our surprise the Senior Level Two 3rd place went to us! We had lost out to Bournemouth and Staffordshire, who is all fairness both gave awesome performances on the day. For some of the squad it was their first time visiting the hostel of dreams we stayed at last year. The streets sur-

rounding the place look grim, but inside the hostel you suddenly enter a magical hippie world with free chocolate fondant, it was hard not to like the place. The next morning was another early start, and we had a long day ahead of us. Partner Stunt had to be ready again by the time we got their so they could perform shortly after we arrived. Their routine worked out well, and everyone was happy with the result. For Cheer, later in the afternoon, the mood of the group was mixed. Everyone needed to be hyped up and confident that we have a good chance of winning, having already won this level at previous events. So out came the Pompey chants and we were on our way. The buzz around the squad was amazing, and we came off feeling pretty sweet about it. As a result of the day being extremely long and tiring, A few of the girls decided to have some fun and make an announcement about how “Portsmouth Phoenix wanted to thank Laura Peters for all her hard work and dedication to the squad, and would be sad to lose her after her amazing news of expecting a little bundle next year. Hopefully Baby Peter’s will grow up to be like her mum and be the cheeriest cheerleader of the Squad”. Surprising-

ly enough it didn’t get taken to well and Laura chased Pascale around the whole arena trying to soak her in water. Good times. Dance had their first performance in the evening against an array of different styles of dance. Some were hip hop, street, cheer and pom pom. The range of different dances made it very difficult to work out what the results were going to be like. So finally results time dawned on us again, with Partner Stunt coming 2nd, Cheer coming 3rd and Dance not even placing. Partner Stunt were more than happy with 2nd as the day before was the better routine. Cheer were also satisfied with the result as we lost out to the same squads and in the same running order, so at least we know we kept our standards up. However, Dance received the highest marking out of all the different categories we entered, so didn’t understand how they couldn’t have placed out of 8 trophies. It’s fair to say the girls felt cheated. A way some of the girls put a smile on their faces after the results was making Anna sing Incy Wincy Spider in Swedish, and practically any other song we could think of. The next morning we didn’t have to get up so early, so strolled down to the centre around 11. Our minibus

was the first to arrive when we got a text to turn onto Radio 1. The other girls had stopped off at a service station to scream and shout down the phone to Radio 1 telling them about our competition, how we had done and that we had dance later. Jess even managed to rumble up a cheer for them... which included getting drunk, no surprise there! We even received a little fighting talk from a different squad saying we are wannabees. All things considered, despite us being so called ‘wannabees,’ we managed to come first in our dance competition. The feeling and mood of the squad was incredible. Especially seeing as the squad who had text into Radio 1 had been significantly less successful at the weekend’s competitions. Once we had received our last trophy of the weekend we all piled into the car park and took pictures with the 5 trophies we had won, none of which were below 3rd place. It seems like Portsmouth Phoenix is having its named thrown around BCA as winners, with 5 trophies in a weekend, 7 overall. We may also have a chance to compete in May, where with any luck we will better that result!! Either way, next year at BCA you can be sure that we wont be thought of a ‘wannabies’ and any team that underrates us does so at their peril.

Portsmouth earn Medal in the BUSA nationals Adam Sunman

Portsmouth University sailing club had their hard work rewarded last week when they came 3rd in the British University Sailing Association Yachting Nationals. The week consisted of 8 races, each taking 6 hours. The course starts at Spitbank fort, heading down the coast to Yarmouth on the Isle of Wight, and then returning downwind to the fort. The two ‘home’ teams entered the competition on the back of strong performances, Portsmouth White, having won the ‘Sunsail Chiller Day’ Competition just days before, and Portsmouth Blue with a string of regatta victories under their belt.

Portsmouth’s advantage of sailing in familiar waters soon became clear, as the battle for podium places was narrowed down to only a few candidates. Both teams managed consistently good results, keeping them high in the rankings. The end of day 1 found both teams in the top ten by the close of the first day. The six hour race, however, was where Portsmouth’s sailors were able to demonstrate their acute local knowledge of tides and wind patterns, allowing Portsmouth White to storm through the fleet and achieve an impressive second place. Tension was high on the last day of racing as Portsmouth White started the day at the top of the leader-board, but an unlucky day meant that their dreams of the National Trophy faded,

and the team shifted down to third place. This bad luck was not echoed in Portsmouth Blue however, who won the final race of the week, putting them in nineth place overall. The week was a demonstration of the high standard of sailing found amongst students, and was supported by the Royal Yachting Association, who provided top coaches for the week, giving both advice on the water and a video debrief each day. Despite coming third, the British University Sailing Association have stated that Portsmouth White are “The team to watch out for next year!” and thanks to the Athletic Union and the Sailing Club’s committee, the club is well on the way to achieving that national championship crown next year!

Photo: Lucy Henry

Sport » Ski and Snowboard

Sport » Swimming

Ski and Snowboard easter trip

Swim rule south coast

continued from p16 proved popular, allowing people to show off their skills, push their riding and just chill on the deck chairs half way down. Socials are what Pompey Snow do well, with the standard superhero and rave fancy dress nights in the resort, to the infamous Mountain Meal. After taking the last lift up the mountain, we headed to a slope side restaurant smartly dressed in suits and dresses for a night to remember, although many didn't! The end of the meal signaled it was time for a drunken descent of the mountain, skiiers and boarders making their way precariously down the slopes guided by flaming torches. As can be imagined, there

Liam Small

was an abundance of falls and close calls as people struggled to stay upright. Partying continued down the mountain with those who missed out on the Mountain Meal. The Valley Rally took place on the Thursday. Teams of students ride around the mountain stopping at checkpoints and completing challenges to accumulate points. Points are awarded for the successful completion of the challenges with extra points for nakedness. The Pompey teams picked up some interesting injuries, with bad sunburn and red raw backsides from Matt and Nathan due to one Pompey teams deciding to ride around the mountain half naked, with their costumes ranging from a tight

gold thong to a bright pink all in one ski suit. One of our teams gained second place overall and only just missed out on first. It was a fantastic week I'm sure everyone will remember, and I know I'm not the only one who wishes they were still out there and not back in England waiting a whole 8 months until our next fix of snow. The year is not over yet though, with a lot still to come. Our ski and snowboard race teams are competing at the Kings Nationals in May and we need supporters to cheer them on! Keep an eye out for upcoming socials as dissertations are handed in and deadlines are passed, there is always something to celebrate!

This weekend saw a depleted Portsmouth University Swim Team travel up the coast to Brighton University for a 5-team Varsity gala. Jack 'Pirate Steve' Smith set the tone for the gala in the first event by fending off competition to grab first place in the 200m Individual medley. Next up the 8x50m Mixed Medley Relay saw Portsmouth ease to victory aided by strong swims from David Hinkman and BUCS finalist, Mark Williamson. The success continued in the female individual events with Emily Walker placing 1st in the 100m Backstroke and 2nd in both the 100m In-

dividual Medley and 50m Butterfly. Alice Hedger also produced notable performances gaining 2nd place in the 50m Freestyle and Backstroke. Meanwhile some of Portsmouth's big guns were dominating in the male events, Jack Smith placed 1st in the 50m Backstroke and 100m Individual medley and Mark Williamson in the 50m and 100m Breastroke events. Hero of the day was Liam Small after wins in 50m Freestyle, 50m Butterfly, 100m Freestyle and 100m Backstroke, picking up the overall 'Best Male' award. The day was rounded off by the 8x50m Freestyle Relay that saw Portsmouth yet again ease to victory, setting them up to win the gala outright and picking up the Varsity Trophy.

Pugwash News Wednesday 29th April 2009

Sports

Portsmouth beat the police... again Adam Insam

The Portsmouth Boxing squad came up against the Met Police on the 2nd of April in club Lux. The event ended with Portsmouth’s second win against the police with 4 wins out of the 6 bouts from a total of 12 contests. The show started with a well received performance by the dance club and bouts began shortly after. The Portsmouth corner was being taken by coach Darren Wiseman. Becky Rigby began the boxing at 8pm. Using her head movement and strong two punch combinations she put a great deal of pressure on her opponent, but was unfortunately not awarded the decision. After Becky was Lewis Caldwell in the lightweight division who looked calm beforehand. He started the bout with great energy and speed, using some brilliant combinations. In the second round his opponent came back stronger and Lewis was beaten after a hard fought contest. Kat Beard was in her debut bout, she received a massive welcome from the crowd. Her opponent was much taller and muscular, using her strong jab to keep Kat at bay. After a great effort from Kat, showing good grit and determination, the win was given to her opponent. William Jasper was up in his third bout. He boxed well against a shorter opponent who forced him to work up against the ropes and in the corner. Will traded numerous blows with his opponent but a combination of good skill and technique saw him rightly claim the win, much to the satisfaction of the crowd. Wadha Rb followed in the next entertaining bout. It looked an evenly matched bout, but Wahda boxed well using blocks and straight clean punches which landed. Unfortunately the win was given to her opponent which most of the crowd disagreed with. Her opponent went on to win best boxer of the night. Mark Bollman looked confident and full of energy as he entered the ring. After trading some blows, Mark worked quickly against his opponent, drawing blood in a quick barrage of punches, but ultimately did not manage to win the bout after being caught with an unlucky right hand from the police boxer. Next up was another debut for, Dave Phillips, it was clear straight

away that despite this being his first bout, he was the better boxer. Using great aggression, he managed to drop his opponent with a clean shot in the first round. James Williamson was next into the ring for what turned out to be an very entertaining and hard fought competition, he boxed carefully using good footwork for the first round as his opponent skillfully avoided his punches. In the second, he showed his experience and worked hard to beat his opponent, by stepping forward, using his rear hand and determination and fitness he to claim a well deserved victory. Matt “The Marine” Harding was boxing in the light heavyweight division and he used his fitness and aggression to dominate over his opponent who he looked to stop on several occasions. The referee ended this bout as his opponent was too hurt, Matt claimed victory. Bashir Ntwari was representing Portsmouth at cruiserweight. He came forwards strongly for his debut bout, landing many hard punches in the first two rounds, his opponent looked as if he would be knocked out on a few occasions. In the last rounds Bashir began to tire, the crowd was going crazy and Bashir showed great determination and heart, forcing a win for himself. Finally everyone had been waiting for the clubs heavyweight boxer George “Gorgeous” Georgakakis who was up against a strong and fit opponent. George boxed well, landing many strong right hooks to his opponents head, but it didn’t seem to stop him. By the second, George was changing his tactics and kept throwing shots over the top eventually opening a cut above the other boxer’s left eye. This tactic proved more successful as at the end of another hard and tiring fight he gained the victory for Portsmouth. In conclusion it was an excellent night for Portsmouth, winning 6 of the bouts and it was a great start for all the boxers making their competitive debuts. A special thanks to David Hickey and Holly Keats for all their hard work making sure the event ran smoothly. Coach Wayne Gardiner was absent from the show as boxers Kinglsey “The King” Walker and James “Baby Bomber” Connor were boxing internationally in Tokyo, Japan.

Sport » Mixed Hockey

Mixed success at SESSA Fresher Jack

It was a crisp April morning, when the mixed hockey team rolled up to the SESSA cup finals in London. Leaping out of our minibus, we hit the changing rooms, kitting up with superman-esque speed knowing we had little time before the start of the match Fast paced from the off, Pompey had foolishly failed to notice the desert like conditions, until dehydration hit 2 minutes in. Mikey put away a spectacular goal to make it 1-0 at half time. After a close knit half time meeting (and some sunbathing) we were pumped for the second half. Mikey the

machine finished off a show stopping, flawless run by Ginge, making it 2-0, and victory surely? However Brunel weren’t done yet, scoring 2 goals to make it 2-2 at full time. To flicks it went. We knew we were in safe godlike hands when our captain enquired “how do you actually win at penalties”. Paddy stepped forward elegantly for the first flick, failed in the scoring department but suceeded in injuring their keeper. Machine boy pottered in and scored making it 1-1. The Brunel response was to miss the entire goal!. Nutty, after briefly flirting with the umpire scored a belter. Ginge then went on to score the ultimate winning goal, leading to elated scenes.

Bringing back the banter for one issue only...

Tour Gotchas

Mike Moore studying pharmacy who plays for the cricket team was carried home in floods of tears just before throwing up into his hat in the hotel reception...

things at the hotel’...

Sam James of Margate Road finally succumed to the MJ fanatic from down the road...

Sam James finally pulled on tour...in the Burger King toilets...apparently she was a geordie...

Andy ‘Cance’ Leadbetter was wasted from the moment we left the union...

Chewit lost his phone, wallet and pants in the club on the last night after stripping down to nothing but his socks...

A certain guy from the swim team confessed to snogging the badders troll... Fraggy and Caz ditched very early on the third night to ‘keep an eye on

Chewit was definately chatting up one very gorgeous girl before finding out it was Darby’s girlfriend!

Laura Middlecoat: on jumping in the pool: IT’S SO COLD I CAN’T FEEL MY VAGINA

Which Netball fresher cried because she came home with a sandwich not a boy?

One of the Netball social sec’s took her role of responsibility really well....by being smashed on the coach by dover.

Which football fresher got a rather nice surprise when Faye Cook hopped into the wrong bed?? Which Netball fresher went to hospital playing “leap frog” with a footballer?? Tour battle to settle? Want to win a gallon of beer? Win a Boat Race at the Union: Dave.Livingstone@port.ac.uk

e id ur Ins To as ch ot

Downpour didn’t dishearten tour

Chris Hewett

A record breaking number of 480 students gathered at the union at the start of the Easter holidays for what was the biggest AU tour in the universities history, education be damned! Facing the crowd of hundreds from various different sports teams was a monumental 27 hour coach journey through France and Northern Spain. Undeterred by this however, there was a buzz of excitement and delirium at the prospect of four nights of carnage awaiting those brave enough to have signed up. First stop was Dover ferry port and the three hour delay that a few of the coaches suffered meant some compulsory head shaving for many of the tour fresher’s. Heading onto the ferry were also several other universities destined for the same place, the ferry bar subsequently became a carnival of singing, bad dancing and serious amounts of banter between the different uni’s. After what felt like days of sitting on a coach (Oh wait! it was...), singing and partying, the cream of the University of Portsmouth’s Athletic Union finally arrived in Salou. As the teams all found their rooms and more importantly, the hotel bar, all of the staff and tour sec’s were briefed on what was about to ensue. Everyone was confident however, that despite the enormous number of students, they were going to keep the university’s reputation in tact whilst still making sure that everyone knew who the biggest uni in town was. The first night saw almost five hundred where’s wally’s descend upon Salou in what has to have been the single biggest dress up in the AU’s history. A fantastic and slightly surreal night was had by everyone as Pompey made their mark and showed the other uni’s how to party on tour. The hotel that night was buzzing with wally’s coming to and from the

bars as staff members kept a close eye on one or two early night casualties including one man from north of the Watford gap who was taken to his room crying his eyes out... apparently it was his first tour. The next day the pool was the place to be as, in a recreation of many Wednesday nights at the union, most teams gathered in long tables playing games, jumping in the pool and swapping gossip from the night before. That night all of the teams had their own dress ups, the winners of which were unofficially chosen to be the football team who all made a sterling effort with their matador outfits. Ironically, later on that night one or two of them were seen dancing with girls who definitely resembled bulls. A 24 hour downpour the following day didn’t dampen Pompey spirits. Following the awards ceremonies for the successful clubs during the week, the theme was UV rave at a local club. The UV night provided one of the best, and wettest evenings of the tour as Pompey took over the entire club with fluorescent attire and a mass of cash. The grateful bar owners even gave the staff a few freebies to thank them for keeping them in business for another couple of years. The final night gave all of the staff members a chance to let their hair down and join the rest of the students in a night of pure adrenalin, nudity and carnage! A trip to the bar from the night before followed by a takeover of Snoopy’s nightclub with the Artful Dodger gave everyone a chance to sign off the tour with a bang. The only thing on a few people’s minds was the early start on the final morning! And so the 2009 AU sports tour had come to an end. There were tears from some, cheers from others and a general sense that everyone there had been part of something massive; the biggest university tour in Portsmouth’s and the UK’s history.

Ski and Snowboard easter trip Mike Lowry

Adam Sims competes in the BUCS National Windsurfing Championships at Calshot - image courtesy of expix.co.uk check out their website for all the info

With the Easter holidays fast approaching and students looking forward to the break, the lucky group with money to spare, or not in some cases, were looking forward to the fast approaching Ski and Snowboard Club trip to Les Arcs in the French Alps. Building on the success of the Christmas trip, we took 30 privileged individuals to see the sun and the snow. The trip started with a 24 hour journey by coach and ferry. Due to 'mechanical failure', our original coach was replaced with a sub-par coach with no entertainment facilities. Luckily Lauren was on hand to provide the entertainment with drunken coach aisle acrobatics and short term memory loss. Travelling through the night, we arrived at Les Arcs 1800 in the late afternoon. We settled in to the hotel, collected equipment and ate before heading out to the popular haunt of the Red Hot Saloon Bar for what was supposed to be a chilled first night. It never goes as planned. Despite the late night ending with the entire group crammed into 1 hotel room, people were up bright and early, ready to get out on the slopes. Easter time is near the end of the season meaning the lowest resorts are often lacking in the snow department, but higher up, this wasn't a problem, with good snow coverage. With the average temperature around 12°C, and with blue skies every day, the weather was perfect. Unfortunately this meant icy snow in the morning which turned to slush in the afternoon. This didn't deter anyone, with Pompey tearing up the mountains. The ski area of Les Arcs is huge, with many kilometres of slopes for riders of all abilities, from easy blues, through reds and the hard blacks. The Apocacontinued p14 lypse Snow Park

Sport » Coming Soon

Sport » Charity

Write for PWs

Pompey 8’s

Charity is a Question of Sport

PWs needs your club news!

The Pompey 8’s tournament is one of the best known lacrosse tournaments in the country. Hosted at Langstone, the event is taking place on 16th and 17th May. With host of top rated teams from across the south of England attending the two day event, a high standard of lacrosse is guaranteed. Played last year under brilliant sunshine, the event is already shaping up to be bigger this year. Also happening on Sunday 17th May is the intramural mixed tag rugby tournament starting at 11am, teams are made up of 10 players, please contact: Genevieve Beard Women’s Rugby President for details.

Ali Roff

The first ever ‘Question of Sport Night’ RAG Fundraiser, hosted by the Netball Club, was held in the Waterhole and proved itself to be a great success! The netball club has a history of running activities either for charity or to help aspiring young Netball players in and around Portsmouth, this evening proved no different. The Waterhole was overflowing with decorations as the teams entered, contributing the princely sum of £1.50 per player into the RAG buckets. This will have seemed like a bargain however when the teams realised they were to be treated to waitress service by the

dedicated players of the Netball squad throughout the quiz. The room was filled by an excellent turnout of supporting Clubs as well as the Sabbatical team, RAG members, and general students up for some entertainment and fundraising. With general knowledge, entertainment, picture and sports rounds, not forgetting the exciting bonus rounds, the quiz easily catered for everyone’s interests, not just the sporto’s. The Sabb Team, finished 1st place, re-donating their prize, a Freeview Digibox back to RAG. Netball coach ‘Judesters Jems’ came second, landing a meal for two to Las Iguanas, and ‘Nothing to Lose’ did very well and walked away with a George Foreman

Grilling Machine! ‘Team Styles’, who made a guest appearance during the quiz, came 4th winning a box of chocolates, and ‘The 3 at the Back’ coming last, won a plastic ‘spork’ and a pack of chewing gum! All in all it was an excellent night and we hope everyone had as much fun taking part as we did hosting it! Thank you to everyone who got involved, together we managed to raise £84.88 for RAG, a brilliant achievement for its first year!! The Netball Club will be hoping to make Question of Sport Night an annual event, so if you didn’t make it this time, make sure you are there next year to help make it bigger and better, and raise even more money for RAG!

...and features, and photos, and socials, and anything else you want to tell us about your club! It’s easy to get a mention in PWs - just e-mail everything to sportnews@upsu.net, visit www.upsu.net/newsdesk, or come in to the Sabb Office at the Union and have a chat with us any time! For more information, see: upsu.net/p/2166