Saying farewell to Tonbridge

Peter Carpenter (CR 1992-2021)

One year short of three decades service is one helluva shift (long service stints are de rigeur in the English Dept. – witness Edwards, Evans, Smith and Carpenter). But Carps, Carpo, Eagle, Penguin, Pete the Poet or PSDC (Peter Stephen Dedalus Carpenter) and ‘My Old Mucker’/ Best Mate has finally called time. He is without doubt a Giant at the school and is part of its DNA that runs into the brickwork, the stumps, the goalposts, the fields and, of course, Dry Hill House.

Having graduated in English from Pembroke College, Cambridge – securing his 2E offer first – Carps was recruited to work for Her Majesty’s Government (following in the traditions of Blunt, Philby, Burgess and Maclean, perhaps? No). After Cambridge, Carps worked in the Corporals’ Mess of the Royal Welsh Fusiliers (aka the NAAFI - Navy, Army Air Force Institute) in Lemgo (Germany). So why am I telling you all this? Because he describes this NAAFI experience of teaching him to have “no fear in schools”. (Which begs the question, so what really did happen in that Welsh Officers Mess in Germany to ensure schools held no fear?). Having done a PGCE at Bristol University in 1979/80, his first teaching job was in the same city, followed by Dr Challoner’s in Amersham (1981-88) and The Leys School, Cambridge (1988 -1992).

September 1992 – when PSDC began his Tonbridge Odyssey - seems a very long time ago – almost ancient history and one for Tony Robinson and ‘Time Team’ – the birth of the Premier League (and Carps’ beloved Crystal Palace were in it), annus horribilis, Black Wednesday and the ERM fiasco. It was also the year of Jack Wilshire’s birth (unbelievable!). Martin Hammond appointed him as Head of English (looking after the Drama Curriculum too) with a troupe of other ‘big hitters’ in the Class of 92 – Nigel Lashbrook (Head of Science), John Taylor (Doc T – Head of Classics), Paul Parker (ex-captain of Sussex CCC) and George Alexander (Head of Grounds). All with relatively full heads of hair, middle years in front and ‘big plans’. One of Carps’ being the co-founding of the football club (for OT’s of that generation remember ‘Smydon’?).

Back in the day the English department was an unusual set-up in a tall redbrick Victorian construction. Lots of height, not much width; a Peter Crouch of a layout. Classrooms only becoming part of the equation on about floor three. There were 3 permanent teaching rooms in Dry Hill House, a video room, the Sixth Form Common Room, Niven Room and 12 teachers of English including David Walsh, Peter Cummings, Jonathan Smith, Andrew Edwards and a certain John Gibbs. With no EM Forster Theatre, the Senior and Junior Plays were performed in Room 23 (a big room in the Classics Dept that was later reclaimed by John Taylor). Richard Evans (Evs) was his first appointment in 1993.

In his time at the School, Carps has worn several faces: Head of English, Senior Master, Head of Seminar, Director of Arts Week, Director of Teaching and Learning, Head of Creative Writing, teacher of English, Cricket Coach, Football Coach, Rugby Coach (whisper it not but he once coached U16 B Hockey with Mike Bishop in 1993) and tutor in four different houses. The list is long and impressive but doesn’t really capture the true essence of the man. Many of these listings have involved considerable invention and innovation – not ‘old wine in new bottles’ – or the ‘caretaker manager’ role with the ‘safe pair of hands’.

The inaugural Tonbridge School Arts Festival in 2000 (his brainchild) involved a whole week of the arts with boys being encouraged to participate, perform, attend, look and watch. As Senior Master he introduced Professional Development and a School Counsellor. Staff Appraisal was begun and put on a firmer footing alongside departments ‘pairing’ to observe lessons and share good practice in 2005. As an HMI trained School Inspector he successfully guided the school through two ‘Excellent’ inspections.

In terms of defining personal traits you get; no bluffing or pulling wool over eyes, weighing of words, serious about his work, the department, the school, the poetry, the stuff. The raised eyebrow, the slow knowing nod, and, of course, the ‘Ha’. Always done with a hint of humour and the fun-loving criminal inside. In May 2013, Carps had major open-heart surgery and returned to a full timetable with all the trimmings; cricket, footy and creative writing. Amazing.

With lots of plans to write, publish and embrace an entirely different style of life in Aldeburgh will be just the retirement tonic and we wish you, Amanda, Zoe and Bea all the very best in Suffolk. You will be very, very sorely missed by the whole of the Tonbridge community.

'Doc' Richards (CR 2002-current)

Andrew Edwards (CR 1985-2020)

When Steady asked me to say a few brief words on his retirement, it was both a privilege and a daunting task and to be truthful, I did not know how, or where, to begin. It is impossible to try to condense Andrew Edwards’ contribution to Tonbridge in a brief five-minute speech. Thankfully a colleague came to my rescue by answering my plea for help with the following thought:

I know it is not a bereavement, but what Armitage said about losing Heaney – ‘You wake up and somebody has taken one of the mountains away’ – is exactly how I feel about losing Andrew from the English department. ‘You wake up and somebody has taken one of the mountains away’. Andrew is a mountain in the recent history of Tonbridge School and any hope of this brief scattering of words doing him justice is scant when one considers what a role he has played. There can be few, if any, who have experienced Tonbridge from as many angles as Andrew. Consider that he spent five years here as a boy in School House from 1973-78, playing for the First XV under John Gibbs and holding the 80m hurdle record for 23 years, that he then returned as a teacher and tutor in Welldon House in 1985 following his degree in History of Art at Magdelene College, Cambridge and a few years working at Christie’s in London, before becoming Housemaster of School House in 1996 which position he carried out with the utmost care and distinction until 2006. Following a sabbatical, he was appointed Upper Master from 2009- 2015 before stepping down to concentrate on his English teaching. Four headmasters, five heads of departments and about 37,000 lessons. Oh yes, he also coached the Under14A XV for years, ran Athletics faithfully, developing a fine working relationship with Graeme Gales and a style of relay exchange that made Tonbridge the envy of other schools, edited The Tonbridgian, coached Fives, was faithful in Conservation each week with Colin Swainson. Additionally, he has served on the Old Tonbridgian Society committee, seen Tonbridge through the eyes of a parent with his son, William, a boarder at Park House from 2003-2007 and of course through the eyes of the wonderful Phillippa, his wife, working for many years at the school as the German Language assistant and a brilliant partner in the maelstrom of a boarding House. I fear that this list is not exhaustive, and I apologise to Andrew for any omissions in this list. But apart from that what else is there to say?

Essentially listing Andrew’s list of service is redundant; it is not in any sense an understanding of the man beneath. It is mere ‘knowledge’, numbers, not truth. When I first arrived at Tonbridge, Steady was one of the reasons I wanted to come here. Yes, I had read Jonathan Smith’s ‘The Learning Game’ where his love of Tonbridge shone through but my ‘interview’ with Steady and Jonathan was brilliant fun as we covered everything – literature (eventually), white van men, the evangelical nature of skiers, Nissan micras as I sat and loved the levels of laughter and obvious friendship. When I was offered a mentor in the dept by Richard Evans, I chose Steady instinctively – he just had this caring persona who made you feel better about things when you had a duff lesson or were a bit tired. Never judgemental, never offering frivolous advice, just the wisdom and care of an experienced colleague. When I was a housemaster in Oakeshott, if I needed advice, I turned to him. I have never met someone who instinctively knew what the boys at Tonbridge would welcome, tolerate or reject outright. His feel for what Tonbridge boys would accept and welcome is uncanny; it is as if he has a diviner’s rod to hit the true source of the school and tell you instinctively what is and what is not. Last night we had a farewell drink as a department for Steady and essentially, we were in a state of shock; none of us can envisage the department without him here. Tears were shed as colleagues opened up about how important a man he is and has been in our department. ‘Quite simply the best teacher of Shakespeare and poetry I have ever come across’ is how a colleague with more teaching experience than Steady described him.

By John Bleakley (CR 2002-current)

To finish reading  tonbridgesociety@tonbridge-school.

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OBITUARIES

The following deaths and obituaries section covers notifications that we were made aware of between 1st May 2020 and 30th April 2021. For more recent obituaries and notifications, please see our website at: https://www.tonbridgeconnect.org/news

HADFIELD, Noël (Dr)

The following obituary was provided by Noël’s son, Robert Hadfield MBE (MH 67-71) Dr Noël Hadfield, died peacefully at home in his 101st year on 17 February 2021.

Noel was the last of four siblings, born before, during and after World War One, into a musical and artistic household in Lancashire.

His parents had a poor record when it came to choosing schools and as a result his elder brothers experienced some miserable times at Sherbourne and Rossall. It was by dint of good fortune that they sent Noel to Tonbridge, having let their holiday home in the Lake District to an assistant master from the school whom they deemed to be a good chap.

His time in Manor House was happy. He sang in the choir, was a reasonable cross-country runner and even claimed to have enjoyed square-bashing on the Quad in the OTC.

After school he went to University College, London to study medicine. World War Two intervened but his time as an officer in the RAMC was a happy one. He never heard a shot fired in anger and learned enough Swahili to be able to converse many years later with the surprisingly large number of Swahili-speaking waiters and baristas that there seem to be in Surrey. He got to see Kenya, Egypt and Palestine (as it then was) although an ambitious plan to meet up in the Belgian Congo with his cousin Albert, by then serving with the Force Publique, there came to naught. On pre-embarkation leave he did however bump into his former Head of House, T P Page, on the shores of Lake Victoria where they exchanged a stiff greeting before going their separate ways. Even in Africa it was not done to fraternise with boys from the years above.

After the war he decided to specialise in anaesthetics. It turned out to be a good career choice and he was a happy anaesthetist for 45 years, mainly in his native Southport. There was a large garden with lawns to mow. There was plenty of entertainment in the town and restaurants where they were assured of a warm welcome. The Scientific Society, the Union Club and the Fine Art Society provided cultural stimulation. He had a well-appointed garage where he spent many hours not only fettling his beloved cars but also repairing and fixing a myriad of other things. Domestic appliances were expected to last for decades, and generally did.

His post-medical world was busy and active. Now relocated to Weybridge he spent many happy hours driving grandchildren to school. Whether or not they enjoyed being subjected to Alan Bennet’s monologues, John Betjeman’s poetry or Edith Piaf’s warblings as they travelled the crowded Surrey roads with a nonagenarian at the wheel is something only they know.

At his funeral we played the 1967 BBC recording of the congregation and choir of Tonbridge School singing the hymn ‘The Day Thou Gavest Lord is Ended’ (MH 33-37))

BIRRELL, Norman Alistair (Alistair)

Died on 27 February 2020, aged 97. Brother to Donald Arthur Lawrie Birrell (HS 38-41). (HS 36-39)

TUSON, Lawrence Edward (Ted)

Died on 11 July 2020, aged 97, at Torbay Hospital. He will be sadly missed by his family and friends. (PS 37-41)

NOTTIDGE, Nicholas Rolfe

Died on 5 May 2020, aged 93, having recently contracted pneumonia. (SH 39-44)

TWITCHELL, Harry Gilhespie

Passed away peacefully on 24 April 2021 in Pittsfield, Massachusetts, aged 99. Harry is survived by his wife Elizabeth, sons Keith, Colin and Owen and stepdaughters Amy Meyer, Bonny Saulnier, Jenny Hankwitz, Molly Hankwitz, and Lucy Hendricks. The following obituary was published on the Greenwich Time website.

After a long, interesting and happy life, long time Greenwich resident Harry Gilhespie Twitchell passed away peacefully on April 24, 2021, in Pittsfield, Massachusetts.

Mr. Twitchell was born on September 15, 1921, in Lisbon, Portugal. He resided in Lisbon for the first five years of his life while his father Karl Twitchell, the noted geologist and explorer, oversaw copper mining operations nearby.

With his mother Nora Gilhespie Twitchell, he migrated to Devonshire, England in 1926, and began attending school at Winchester Lodge. He then graduated from Tonbridge School in 1939.

As World War II became imminent, Mr. Twitchell and his mother moved to the United States while his father continued his career in Saudi Arabia. Mr. Twitchell attended the University of Vermont, from which he graduated with a B.A. in Political Science in 1943.

After graduation, Mr. Twitchell enlisted in the U.S. Army, serving at several bases in this country as well as in the Philippines. He was honourably discharged with the rank of Lieutenant.

Upon returning to civilian life, Mr. Twitchell attended Pratt Institute in Brooklyn, receiving a second B.A. in Architecture and lettering in tennis. He spent the largest part of his career working in New York City for the national YMCA, where he specialized in designing swimming pool buildings and facilities. Beginning in 1975, he was selfemployed, preparing drawings for a variety of residential and commercial projects.

In 1955, he married the former Elizabeth Jane Cassatt, with whom he had three sons. She predeceased him in 2002.

One of Mr. Twitchell’s proudest achievements was designing and having built the Hillside Roadhouse where he resided for well over fifty years. A classic mid-century modern design, it included a variety of innovative features.

Mr. Twitchell was active in several aspects of Greenwich life. He served on the Representative Town Meeting for many years, as well as with the Greenwich Land Trust, At Home in Greenwich, and the Greenwich YMCA. In later years, he was an active participant in the Retired Men’s Association.

Mr. Twitchell was also very involved with Christ Episcopal Church, where as a Lector his clear English accent made him a popular reader of the gospel for decades. He chaired the church’s Property Commission, lending his architectural talents to several projects; he also served on the History Commission and helped count contributions after services. He was also a graduate of the “Education for Ministry” program.

An avid sailor, Mr. Twitchell spent countless happy hours on Long Island Sound in his small boats and was an officer and instructor with the Greenwich Power Squadron. He was so committed to sailing, rather than pulling out the outboard motor, that on more than one occasion in light airs, he ended up drifting onto the rocks. When not testing those waters, he was also an enthusiastic tennis player.

Mr. Twitchell also enjoyed travel; in addition to visiting most of the United States, he ventured to such exotic locales as Russia, Tanzania, China, and the Greek Islands. Well into his 80s, he visited old friends in England and did a cruise of the fjords of Norway.

In 2012, Mr. Twitchell married again, to Elizabeth Hankwitz, the widowed former college roommate of his first wife. The companionship they provided for each other in their later years was a blessing for them both. (PS 35-39)

WARRENER, Michael Reginald

Died peacefully on the 6th April 2021, his 97th birthday. He started at Tonbridge just over 83 years ago. A week before he died, he had been talking about his first day, remembering people he saw and the Bumph Test that he had to complete. He leaves a son Andrew (SH 70-75) and a daughter Vala. He also leaves five grandchildren including Thomas (SH 04-09) and Florence. (SH 38-42)

MacNICOL, Harry Malcolm (Malcolm)

Died on 31 October 2020, aged 93. He went to hospital in October and sadly, after a couple of operations, he slipped away peacefully early in the morning of Saturday 31st October. 15th December 1926 -31st October 2020

Obituary written by Antony Bowring, Malcolm’s son-in-law

Malcolm, as he was known by all, joined Tonbridge School in 1941. He boarded in Parkside House in the care of Reverend Page and started in Form II under the tutelage of Mr Bathurst. Malcolm soon joined the school choir, the Music Society and developed skills learning to play the chapel organ with Head of Music, Dr Alan Bunney. He also enjoyed the Debating Society and the Photographic Club. His prowess on the sport’s field is unclear. In his memoires, which give a fascinating insight into school life during the war years, he doesn’t give any evidence of being an enthusiastic sportsman himself but he was a proud supporter of the school’s rugby and cricket teams. In the early 40’s school life was greatly influenced by the war. Much physical activity was devoted to growing vegetables, helping local farmers and the residents of Tonbridge. Nights were frequently interrupted by air raids and meals were limited due to food rationing. Nevertheless Malcolm enjoyed his time at Tonbridge. His favourite studies were Art under Mr Hervey- Adams, Chemistry and Carpentry with “Boosy” Hawkes.

All boys had to join the OTC and were issued with First World War khaki uniforms, army boots and long puttees. Thursdays were devoted to military drills and parades under physics teacher Major “Bucket” Dixon. Cadets learned rifle and machine gun

cleaning, stripping and care as well as map reading, compass work, shooting, first aid and elementary tactics – all skills that served Malcolm well when he joined the army having graduated from school with respectable exam results in Maths, Mechanical drawing, English language, English literature, French, Chemistry and Physics.

Following training at Blenheim Camp near Bury St Edmunds, Malcolm spent the last throes of WW2 in Egypt. After the war he enjoyed many years of involvement with the Territorial Army while professionally he trained as a vintner. However, for most of his working life Malcolm enjoyed a life connected to the sea, as a yacht broker, delivery skipper and proprietor of a chandlery.

Malcolm was born in Hampshire and grew up in Kent within a very close and loving family with three siblings. In the late 1980’s Malcolm and his first wife Sheila (known to all as ‘Tommy’) packed up their home of 37 years in Sussex, closed their yacht brokerage and chandlery and moved to Parham in Suffolk to be near their grandchildren.

Malcolm, being an especially gregarious man, was soon making friends around the parish. He started by volunteering to deliver the parish magazine which he did with great panache using the new GPS system (Sat Nav) to locate parishioners’ homes. Much to their surprise and delight he was able to inform them of their precise latitude and longitude.

He also volunteered to play the organ in Parham church, something he would do, he said, for just a couple of years. He finally retired from this 25 years later when he reached 90, but he continued to help out whenever he could.

He loved parties and community gatherings - apart from annual church and village fetes there were parties to honour diverse events from Lord Nelson’s bicentenary to solar eclipses. There were also garden parties, and even parties to celebrate the apple harvest. In his irrepressible way, Malcolm used any reason he could think of to get together with neighbours, friends and family, always playing the jovial host with great bonhomie.

Sadly, Tommy died after only 3 years of living in Suffolk. Sometime later Malcolm met Daphne and they went on to enjoy 25 years together.

They sang in the choir, they sailed, they travelled the world and they gardened. Planting trees was high on his list of priorities. Many of the now quite substantial trees around the village of Parham were planted by Malcolm and Daphne, including a Millennial Oak and accompanying seat on the village green.

Every year, in September, he took part in the Suffolk Historic Churches bike ride. He must have entered this event at least 20 times, most recently when he was nearly 90 and very wobbly. To this day he holds the county record for cycling to the most number of churches in any single year (60 miles-50 churches). It was an expensive business if he persuaded you to sponsor him for each church he visited.

He was a talented carpenter and mechanic; he spent so many hours in his beloved barns that one grandchild actually thought he lived in them. One of his long-term projects was finished three years ago - he had built a gypsy caravan to 2/3rd scale. It was the perfect size for Malcolm and Daphne and for anyone with a similar stature especially grandchildren.

He took a keen interest in the history of the region and was once a volunteer guide at nearby Framlingham Castle where he enthralled children with stories of battles and chivalry (most of which he dreamt up to arouse their interest). For the last five years he was a recorder for Suffolk Local History Council.

Over the last few years he suffered increasingly from bad circulation. In October he went to hospital and after a couple of operations sadly he slipped away peacefully early in the morning of Saturday 31st October.

Malcolm made many friends during his time at Tonbridge School with whom he remained in touch throughout his long and active life. (PS 41-44)

BOLLAM, Robert Calvin (Calvin)

Died peacefully at home on 8 September 2020, aged 92. (WH 42-46)

BOUCHER, Rex Roy Comyn

Died on 8 August 2020, aged 91. Devoted husband to Marguerite for 66 years and much loved and sorely missed father by his sons Hugh (HS 69-73) and Robert (HS 71-76) and five grandchildren. (HS 42-46)

NOTT-BOWER, Colin Guy

Passed away very peacefully at Elmwood, Colyford on 10th March 2021, aged 92 years. Much loved husband of the late Molly. Beloved father, grandfather and great grandfather. He will be much missed by all his family and friends. (PH 42-46)

TAYLOR, John Robson

Died on 20 June 2020 in Sydney, Australia, aged 91. Husband to Brenda, father to Michael, Philippa, Simon and Justin and grandfather of twelve.

The following obituary has been written by his children Justin, Simon, Philippa and Michael.

John was born on the 10th February 1929 in Zomba, the 4th largest city of Nyasaland (now known as Malawi having gained independence from the UK in 1964) and was the only child of Leslie and Nancy. Shortly after his birth the family left Zomba, travelling up the Zambezi River, for a life back in the UK, which coincided with the start of the Great Depression.

Back in the UK, the family settled in Sevenoaks,

Kent, and John attended Tonbridge School from 1942 to 1947 embracing all that Tonbridge could offer with keen involvement both academically but also in pursuing rugby and his life-long passion of cricket.

Graduating from Tonbridge School at the end of World War 2 and disappointed at having missed the opportunity to serve his country he immediately joined the army where he served for nearly 4 years, until, whilst being driven across the Salisbury Plain to attend to an accident involving a bus, his Land Rover rolled breaking both his legs. John left the army in 1950 and commenced a Civil Engineering degree at Kings College, London graduating in 1953.

These early years of John’s life placed him in environments and gave him experiences which had an undeniable influence on the person we came to love.

John was a man who went forward in life with a fierce sense of purpose, never wanting to waste a day; he possessed an empathy and sense of fairness for others, always seeking out the more interesting; a yearning for adventure, travelling the road less travelled; and always questioning what we could have often taken for granted.

With John now working as a Chartered Civil Engineer he spent his free time developing his love for sailing. Racing Fireflys and OK dinghies and taking weekend trips up and down the French coast.

In 1958 the chance meeting of Brenda Vokins at Chequers Pub in Sevenoaks really paved the way.

In December of 1958 Brenda and John were married and John whisked her off to Nassau in the Bahamas where he’d secured a two-year posting.

Returning from the Bahamas in 1961, John accepted a two-year posting in Sydney, arriving in December of 1962. The two-year posting turned into a rest of life commitment as John and Brenda quickly circled themselves with friends from school, sailing, the golf club, the SCG and work.

Life in Australia was purpose built for John’s adventurous lifestyle. As an engineer in the 60’s and 70’s he travelled across the largely unchartered Pacific, well ahead of the tourist onslaught, and during the 80’s worked on projects extending into the United Arab Emirates managing the design and delivery of a strategically placed harbour at the entrance of the Straits of Hormuz.

In 1986 at the age of 57 John retired from his work as a Civil Engineer and commenced an odyssey of travel, photography, art and gardening which kept him busy for the next 35 years.

John placed great value in tradition and history, he was often mistaken as being conservative, on the contrary he was a progressive thinker, and he often took pleasure in disarming others with his dry wit and forthright views.

Above all John cherished the ever-growing family he had created from his humble beginnings in Nyasaland. John is survived by his wife Brenda, his children Michael, Philippa, Simon and Justin and his 12 grandchildren. (HS 42-47)

WATTS, David Ewart

Died peacefully at home on 12 April 2021, aged 91. Beloved husband, father, grandfather and great-grandfather: Timothy (WH 70-74), Peter (WH 75-80), Tom (WH 05-10), Matt (WH 08-13). (WH 43-48)

GLOVER, Brian Michael

Died on 25 July 2020, aged 90. (PS 43-48)

MIDDLETON, Stephen

Died peacefully on Thursday 8 April 2021, aged 91 years. A much loved husband to Carol, father to Rosemary, Judith and Timothy, grandfather and great grandfather. He will be sadly missed.

Stephen was educated at Manor House Preparatory School and Tonbridge School and served in the Royal Engineers as a Captain. After leaving the army, he was Company Secretary for BOCM Pauls in Ipswich and was a regular member of the choir at St Michael’s in Framlingham. (HS 43-47)

WALKER, Peter Hugh (Hugh), MBE

Died on 15 September 2020, aged 89. Hugh died at his home in Sherborne, leaving behind a wife, the painter Anne Moorse-Walker, and step-children and step-grandchildren.

The following obituary was written by Hugh’s niece, Lesley Curwen and appeared in the Guardian

My uncle Hugh Walker, who has died at the age of 89, was a colonial administrator in Britain’s most controversial conflicts, though he became disillusioned with aspects of British rule.

His life began badly. He was an illegitimate baby, one of three unwanted children from a long affair between a nurse and a married man.

A rich elderly spinster found him in a children’s home, adopted him and sent him to Tonbridge public school where he enjoyed being with other children, though he was not academically gifted. National Service was spent in the Somali Scouts regiment where his fluent Somali led him to become an officer in the Colonial Service who was posted to Kenya as a District Commissioner.