TALK OF THE TOWNS

st. louis

In our mention a few issues ago of a much-unloved billionaire—Jeff Bezos of Amazon—we are reminded that Bezos is no higher than No. 2 among heinous high earners. For anyone true to The Lou, the No. 1 spot has been occupied for years by billionaire Stan Kroenke, owner of the erstwhile St. Louis Rams, who pulled the rug out from under metro fans of NFL football, vamoosed with the team to L.A., leaving the Dome to languish, used only occasionally for monster-truck events. Speaking of languishing, a 2016 lawsuit for breach of contract, etc., etc., filed against Kroenke, the Rams, the NFL— heck; essentially anyone wearing horns— didn’t seem like it would amount to a mound of ram … um, a hill of beans. But the courts have been ruling consistently against Kroenke. If this keeps up, maybe the devil will get his due. I mean, he moved our home team for illicit profit. Selfish dweeb. Kroenke et al. filed in June for summary judgment, essentially requesting that the court toss out the suit. No dice. Change of venue? Nope. But can’t you keep the obscene amount he’s worth under wraps? Not a chance. All sports fans remember Kurt Warner and that Super Bowl victory in 2000. Sure, there were 15 losing seasons among the 21 that the usually hapless team played here. No matter. There’s nothing a St. Louisian can hold onto longer than a grudge, and I’m as peeved as the rest of you that some uber-rich dillweed thinks we’re too small a market for an NFL team! So, when the lawsuit that begins in January winds up, let’s all hope Kroenke (it really should rhyme with cranky) gets an outcome that includes his empty wallet handed back to him.

talk

OF THE TOWNS

by bill beggs jr.

clayton

BARcelona Tapas, in my somewhat humble opinion, is one of Clayton’s most charming restaurants. It now finds itself smack-dab-bullseye in the footprint of a multi-use development slated for the southeast corner of the prime intersection where Central and Maryland avenues cross: Bemiston Place. Weep not, foodies. There’s still time to get in a great meal, maybe on the sidewalk patio; the lights won’t turn off for the last time until after close of business Saturday, Sept. 25. In a statement, Frank and Eloise Schmitz say they hope to reopen in a new location in the future; I’m of the mind that it should be sooner rather than later. For as long as they’re idled, we’ll miss them … BARcelona has been there forever, in restaurant years. We always felt like we’re dining with good friends. Frank is the consummate host and embodies the spirit of a genuine tapas eatery: in a word, sharing. Actually, it’s up to you and your dining companions. (“Here, mom—lemme take a few of those tender beef medallions off your plate.”)

cwe

Garry Kasparov’s eventual defeat at the fingertips and via the neurons of StL grandmaster Leinier Dominguez probably wasn’t the legendary former world champion’s most stunning loss in a tournament. Kasparov might say that would have to be his earth-shattering defeat by Deep Blue— an IBM supercomputer—in a six-game contest in 1997. Last week he came in fifth in a tournament featuring three days of over-the-board chess played by the world’s best in Chess960 (or Fischer Random chess). Deep Blue probably wouldn’t have been programmed to succeed at this sophisticated new twist on the ancient board game. Dominguez took a dramatic final-round game against a fellow St. Louisian, grandmaster Levon Aronian, taking home the $37,500 first prize. Winding up in a second-place tie were grandmasters Wesley So, Maxime Vachier-Lagrave and Sam Shankland, each of whom won 20 grand; Kasparov’s take was $12,500. Dominguez was no less than delighted at his performance throughout the event. “It’s been a while since I’ve won a tournament this strong, and I’m pleased that it happened here in St. Louis, of all places,” he said.

TT trivia

WHERE ELSE IN THE METRO IS THERE A FUN DINING ESTABLISHMENT CREATED IN LARGE PART WITH METAL SHIPPING CONTAINERS?

st. charles

Attention, rabid cycling enthusiasts! Instead of having to contend with urban and suburban motor-vehicle traffic, you’ll still be able to ride nearly the entire 237-mile stretch of our beloved Katy Trail even when Interstate 270 bridge work is being done way, way above your helmet-clad head somewhere out yonder near Columbia. Shipping containers will be lined up to create a makeshift tunnel along a stretch of the bicycle and pedestrian path, below an aging I-70 bridge crossing the Missouri River at Rocheport, to protect riders from falling construction debris. The sturdy metal containers also have been used to build unique if oft-amusing residences popping up everywhere, including a number in the metro, one of them a St. Charles dazzler that attracted some 2,000 guests to an open house. And they’re integral to the architecture that’s made Rockwell Beer Co. such an unusual and delightful stop along Vandeventer Avenue in the Forest Park Southeast neighborhood. The original I-70 bridge, built in 1960 and rated in ‘poor’ condition, will be replaced in two phases; the span in one direction is slated for opening to traffic in late spring 2023, the second span slated for a late-2024 completion. So remember, motorists—share the road with bicycles. Meanwhile, cyclists—please be aware of vehicles! Nobody owns the road, so y’all just be polite.

LAST ISSUE’S Q&A

What is a cost-share grant from the Missouri Department of Conservation? Missouri Department of Conservation cost-share grants assist government entities and nonprofits with management, improvement and conservation of trees and forests on public land. The grants help communities boost tree inventories, remove or prune invasive and hazardous flora, and train volunteers and city/county employees to best care for community forests.

union station

This item could also have had St. Louis Public Library for a subhead. Both the iconic train station and the similarly fabulous Carnegie library building downtown are usually among the architectural wonders we take family, friends and other out-of-towners to see when they’re showing off the StL. And the station’s hotel lobby is where Michael Francis, 44, chose to meet with us. Both are favorite venues for the producer’s quest to find creators to vet, nurture, develop and package for TV, whatever the theme or whoever the end user might be. He does casting, too. Not so easy: “People have no clue what it takes to get on TV!” This is all an oversimplification, of course. He could be the creative energy behind a true-crime show. Or one on hoarders or about genealogy. He produced a show in which blues-rocker Melissa Etheridge ‘met’ her ancestors. His wife is a fan of the musician. “And that’s the only one she got interested in,” he adds, with a snicker. Anyhow, what’s with that lemur on his shoulders? He seems kind of chill. Lemurs always look startled, and we got the definite low-key vibe from the producer despite his project Saturday morning having gone to hell in a handbasket. Guess that’s the behind-the-scenes activity that clients at any level don’t need to see. Pleasing the folks who hire you equals delivering results. Positive outcomes, that is. You can see his influence, while not his fingerprints, on Bare Hands PEOPLE HAVE NO CLUE Rescue. It’s a new show on Animal Planet that is, natch, WHAT IT TAKES TO GET a reality show about the ON TV! bare-handed capture of critters that, for instance, would rather live in your house than roam around outside. Bats? Been there. Angry beavers? Well, they’re not always all that mad, just not willing. Michael ‘Bare Hands’ Beran of Louisiana is the star of the series, which premiered Aug. 22. Viewers follow the Wildlife Command Center team as Beran and crew (including his son, Chance) criss-cross the country and find themselves in wildly peculiar situations. Chance, under his father’s wing (so to speak), rescues a raccoon that’s become too comfortable in someone’s attic. Two other team members come face to forked tongue with a venomous snake. Tim, the crew daredevil, gets the call about a coyote in a house; another expert helps Beran sniff out a skunk in a scrap yard filled with hot tubs. And that’s just the pilot. This is the type of fellow and line of work you’d want to know more about. Voila … a series! His headquarters in St. Louis has become a rehab facility and occasionally a forever home for several rescues, including a Brazilian porcupine, a red kangaroo and a pair of lemurs, including the one on Francis’ shoulders. Francis is on the hunt for content and content creators throughout the Midwest, be they unusual people, people in unusually compelling lines of work, what have you. You’ve heard of Dirty Jobs, of course. “Think stuff you can’t do—or wouldn’t want to do,” Francis says, with a grin. Hit him up. Visit michaeldfrancispresents.com. &

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