Come experience ‘RallyTown’ in Tralee this Saturday!

Kerry Motor Club are also hosting a ‘Rally Town’ event, in conjunction with the Tralee Chamber Alliance, This will include a static display of rally cars in the Mall area of the town. This year’s RallyTown event is kindly sponsored by ‘Tralee Quickfit Nice Price Tyres’ on Rock Street, which was recently acquired by John, Sandy and Lauren Corrigan.

As rally competitors themselves, they understand the huge role the 100s of volunteer marshals play in the rally.

As a result, they will give a €10 voucher, which can be offset against a new set of tyres to all marshals who sign on for the rally.

“This kind of generosity is unknown in rally terms,” said deputy clerk of the course Sean Moriarty at the launch.

“As rally competitors themselves, they know the importance our marshals play in rallying and to repay the marshals in this way is unprecedented. RallyTown will run from 12noon until 6 pm in The Mall, Tralee, on April 1, thanks to support from Kerry County Council and Tralee Chamber Alliance.

GOOD OLD ONE-LINERS !

I told my friend 10 jokes to get him to laugh. No pun in 10 did.

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I’ve been tripping all day.

I’ve decided to sell my Hoover – it was just collecting dust.

“I usually meet my girlfriend at 12:59 because I like that one-to-one time.” – Tom Ward

How does NASA organise a party? They planet. Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboards? He was just going through a stage.

What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between you and me, something smells.

My wife told me I had to stop acting like a flamingo. So I had to put my foot down.

Sometimes I tuck my knees into my chest and lean forward. That’s just how I roll.

A soldier survived mustard gas in battle, and then pepper spray by the police. He’s now a seasoned veteran.

I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said “Thanks!” I said “Don’t mention it.”

“I was playing chess with my friend and he said, ‘Let’s make this interesting’. So we stopped playing chess.”

Why do we tell actors to ‘break a leg?’ Because every play has a cast.

FAMOUS ONE -LINERS

A cement mixer collided with a prison van. Motorists are asked to be on the lookout for 16 hardened criminals.” – Peter Kay

“I met this bloke with a didgeridoo and he was playing Dancing Queen on it. I thought, ‘that’s Abba-riginal.’” – Tim Vine

“My grandfather invented the cold air balloon. It never really took off.” – Milton Jones

“Recently I went on a ballooning holiday – I put on four stone!” – Milton Jones

I told the Inland Revenue I don’t owe them a penny. I live by the seaside.” – Ken Dodd “My New Year’s resolution is to get in shape. I choose round.” – Sarah Millican

“My wife – it’s difficult to say what she does. She sells seashells on the seashore.”

– Milton Jones

“I needed a password eight characters long, so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.”

– Nick Helm

“Toughest job I ever had? Selling doors, doorto-door.” – Bill Bailey