Contents Auditor’s Welcome
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Hist History Chamber Debating
Upcoming Guests Getting Involved Editors: Maebh NĂ Ghuairim Niall Maher
Events Membership Deals
Contributors: Catherine Kelly Kayleigh Newcomb Julie Davis Lizzy Younger Sarah McGuinness Maria Pachowicz Liam Smith Special Thanks: Kevin Smyth, for helping to organise freshers week and sponsorship and all of the Hist, for giving me a somewhat genuine reason not to study over the past year or so. Also Billie wanted a shout-out, so hi Billie!
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The GMB
Editor-in-Chief: Tigran Simonian
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Members of Committee
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Auditor’s Welcome Congratulations on entering Trinity, and if you are reading this, for your next excellent choice of joining the oldest student society in the world! Now in our 248th session, the Hist has counted Ireland’s greatest as former members. In between plotting wars and writing books, Wolfe Tone and Bram Stoker have served as Auditors past. Edward Carson, Oscar Wilde, Samuel Beckett, Ernest Walton and Douglas Hyde, have all caught up on their sleep in our Convo Room as members of the society. Individuals from all backgrounds and of views as divergent as they can be have all been attracted to the Hist for everything that we offer. A quick look at our freshers week schedule will show you that what we offer is ‘a lot.’ The heart of what we do is or weekly Wednesday night debate, held at 7:30 every evening in the GMB, (See you there!) followed by a lush reception and a night out. If you are looking to get into debating, there are our wonderful workshops, our maidens Debating competition, and numerous competitions around the country we can bring you to for free. There is, however, so much more to what we do. Whether it comes to nights out, a place to chill between lectures, our headline guests, or annual ball, you will definitely find from reading this that there is more than six euro worth in what we do for you to take part/get lost on your way to lectures with! If my deadpan, monotonal, to the point opening has done enough to convince you to join, head on over to our stand during Freshers Week, or if not, head on over anyway and all let our far more fun, far more funny committee help you make the best choice I guarantee you will make this week. See you Wednesday,
Paul
Paul Molloy - Auditor Senior Sophister Economics and Politics
Proof that the Animate Dead spell from the Hist Almanac actually works, Paul is a corpse given it’s zest back! Having seen through the insubstantial grey smoke of this mortal plane, Paul is well equipped to guide the Hist in all other-worldly matters. If you need to contact him quickly please call 1800-Let’sNotHavePlatoAs OurInaugral or down 24 cans of Coke. Either way Paul will shuffle forward to welcome you to the Dark Beyond, a Hist Card in one hand and a huge invoice in the other.
auditor@thehist.com
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Freshers Week With The Hist 10 am - 12 pm
10 am - 12 pm
Wednesday
10 am - 12 pm
Thursday
10 am - 12 pm
Friday
Monday Tuesday 10 am - 12 pm
Hist Conversation Room
The Pavilion Bar (obviously)
Chill Out at the Pav
from 4 pm
Hist Conversation Room
Mario Kart Tournament with DUCSS and ItalianSoc
1 pm -4 pm
Free Breakfast
Hist Conversation Room
Puppy Room
J.W. Sweetman Bar
Back to the 90s Quiz
6 pm -8 pm
Hist Conversation Room
1 pm -3 pm
Free Breakfast Hist Conversation Room
Debating Workshop & Into to the Hist
Everleigh Gardens
UV Party with SOFIA and Polsoc
8 pm - late
GMB Debating Chamber
Freshers Week Debate This House Would Shift and Drift
6 pm -8 pm
Hist Conversation Room
2 pm -4 pm
Free Breakfast
Hist Conversation Room
Burke Panel Cannabis Culture in Ireland
Stop and Smell the Rosés! with FrenchSoc
Freshers Ball Reception with Trinity Ents
Hist Converstation Room
7 pm - late
Hist Converstation Room
5 pm -7 pm
Hist Converstation Room
Free Breakfast
Hist Conversation Room
1 pm -3 pm
Free Breakfast
12 pm - 1 pm Debating 101
Hist Conversation Room
3 pm - 4:30 pm Speed Friending with Spin 1038
Hist Conversation Room
4:30 pm - 6:30 pm Derby of Rhetoric
Hist Conversation Room
6:30 pm - late Gumball Challenge Crawl Hist Conversation Room
Free Candy Floss and Slushies for all Hist Members, All Day Every Day during Freshers Week!
Hist History The origins of the College Historical Society can be traced from a club set up by the political theorist and philosopher Edmund Burke almost 250 years ago in 1747. The first official meeting of the Society occurred on Wednesday, 21 March 1770. From its inception it showed itself to be at the forefront of intellectual thought in Ireland and many of it’s members went on to affect change in the tumultuous period of history Ireland was going through. The society was briefly expelled from the College in 1794, but readmitted on the condition that “No question of modern politics shall be debated”. In 1797, the poet Thomas Moore and the nationalist Robert Emmet were elected as members. Eight members of The Hist were expelled in 1798 in the run-up to the Rebellion, and a motion was later carried condemning the rebellion, against their former Auditor, Theobald Wolfe Tone, who led the 1798 rebellion against British rule. Tension between the society and the College flourished in the early nineteenth century with the Auditor being called before the Provost in 1810. The late 19th century was considered by many to be the high point of the Society, with many of its members moving to high political positions. It was common for the Members of Parliament for the University to have served on the Committee of the Hist, such as Edward Gibson and David Plunkett, who were both Auditors, and Edward Carson, who was the Librarian. Bram Stoker, author of Dracula, became Auditor in 1872. In 1864 the Society collected money from its members to erect statues of Edmund Burke and Oliver Goldsmith at the Front Gate of College. The society continued well through the twentieth century, with it moving to its current home, the Graduates’ Memorial Building (GMB), in 1904, which it shares with the University Philosophical Society, or better known as the Phil, although the First World War hit the Hist badly, with 136 of its former members killed. The current President is Prof. David McConnell, a former Librarian and Auditor of the Society and a winner of The Irish Times Debating Competition, and now Chairman of The Irish Times Trust and one of Europe’s foremost geneticists. Women had been refused membership of the society until 1969 but soon after the change in the rules, the society debated the motion ‘That this House reveres the memory of Mrs Pankhurst’ with Rosaleen Mills participating. The first female Auditor, future Tánaiste Mary Harney, was elected in 1976. Since then the Society has had four female Auditors. The Society’s Bicentennial Meeting in 1970 was addressed by US Senator Edward Kennedy at which he called the Society “the greatest of the school of the orators” and as the Hist approaches it’s 250th session, it will be interesting to see how it will continue to influence Irish political and cultural life. The Society remains at the forefront of Trinity’s rich intellectual tradition and is hoping to stay there for the foreseeable future.
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Chamber Debating
Chamber Debating, run by the CorrSec Department here in the Hist, is our weekly flagship event. Held in the chamber (ground floor of the GMB) debates start at 7.30pm with a Private business meeting. Everyone is welcome to attend this amusingly archaic tradition in which committee sits around the table in black tie and “minutes” - by which we mean jokes making fun of the week- of the previous private business meeting are read by the Rec Sec. Committee exits the room after this and returns with several guests and the speakers for the motion. Public business is called, more humorous minutes are read, and in the week following a debating competition this is where we congratulate people for both taking part, and doing well/winning. Our guest chair is then introduced, followed by our other guests and speakers. The debate begins. Our style of chamber debating is British Parliamentary. Speeches are 7 minutes in length with the first and last minute protected time and the middle five minutes open to the house, such that if you have a ‘POI- Point of Information’ you may stand and say, ‘on that’ , and the speaker may choose to hear your point. POIs are to be to be no longer than fifteen seconds. The floor opens with the Government bench, Prime Minister on Proposition, followed by
Leader of the Opposition, then Deputy Prime Minister, Deputy Leader of the Opposition, Member of Government, Member of Opposition, Government Whip and finally the debate is closed by Opposition Whip. Following this we sometime allow floor speeches, these are 4 minutes in length and you may sign up to do them during the debate when prompted. The motion is then brought before the house and members of the audience vote to support or reject the motion. The debate concludes with the Chair’s speech and we all go upstairs for a wine and food reception. We debate a variety of motions each term, from Politics, to Economics, to Feminism to the elusive Art motions etc. there is something for everyone.The motion is set for each week in advance and you have the chance to sign up to speak either online on our facebook page, or upstairs on the first floor of the GMB, first door on the left, noticeboard on the right just inside the door. We welcome sign ups from everyone whether you’ve done public speaking before or if it’s your first time. If you are selected to speak, you’ll receive an email from corrsec@thehist.com by the sunday before the debate containing a brief run down of the motion, and the speaking order. (Feel free to email if you have questions, or ask me directly. If you’re nervous about writing a speech, let me know and we will sort out a more experienced debater to give you some tips of the trade.)
Kayleigh Newcomb - Correspondance Secretary Junior Sophister Politics and Economics
You ever get the feeling that someone is...watching you? Observing your every move, discovering your secrets, cataloging your deepest thoughts? Yeah, that’s Kayleigh - unofficially dubbed the “Power behind the Power”. Despite her ever so kind and gentle outward demeanor, Kayleigh Gambino is capable of running an intricate web of cigar smugglers with headquarters in Havana, New York, and your mom’s house. Like any good crime baroness, she would never touch the contraband herself. Her upbringing in the family villa in central Waterford ‘city’ has equipped her with essential negotiation, communication and leadership skills that would come in extremely useful. Just remember - if you mess with her term card, Jonesy and the boys will mess with you.
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corrsec@thehist.com
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This Term at the Hist Freshers Week
This House Would Shift and Drift Week 1 - 27th September
This House Would Burn Britain at the Brexit Table Week 2 - 4th October
This House Believes that the Two State Solution Should be Abandoned Week 3 - 11th October
This House Regrets Wonder Woman as a Feminist Icon Week 4 - 18th October
Inaugural Week 5 - 25th October
This House Believes Science Needs Ethics Week 6 - 1st November
This House Supports the Rise of China 06
Week 7 - Reading Week
This House Believes the World is Doomed Week 8 - 15th November
This House Believes that Political Satire Does More Harm Than Good Week 9 - 22nd November
This House Welcomes the Death of Chivalry Week 10 - 29th November
This House Believes You’ve Nothing to Fear If You’ve Nothing to Hide Week 11 - 6th December
Rosaleen Mills Maidens Competition Final Week 12 - 13th December
This House Would Rather be Naughty Than Nice If you would like to speak in one of our debates, email Kayleigh at corrsec@thehist.com, or sign up outside the Hist Conversation Room.
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The GMB A good Trinity student goes to all of their lectures; A better student doesn’t. So why not spend your four years worth of free time at the Graduates Memorial Building, or better known as the GMB. So much happens and can happen here, that we decided to dedicate a whole page to our home for the past hundred or so years
Second Floor:
The only place on campus that provides snooker and pool tables for free (as long as you’re a Hist member) is found here. We have 5 pool tables and 3 snooker tables, and they’re available to use all day
First Floor:
The Hist Conversation Room, or the convo cause no one actually calls it that, and the Hist Committee room are on this floor. The convo is a great place to hang out with friends, enjoy the events that go on there, eat lunch or just sleep on the couches (they’re really comfy)
Ground Floor:
Here you’ll find our world famous (tm) debating chamber, probably the most important room in the whole building. Every Wednesday night, it is packed with people who watch debates on every topic from feminism to economics to whether one can be Hugglepuff and proud (turns out you can). You’ll also find our frienemies, the Phil, on this floor as well.
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Third Floor:
Our state-of-art (for 2010 standards) computer room is found here. Usually one of the quietest and least busy computer rooms on campus, it makes it a great place to study before taking a nap in the convo (the couches are so comfy!)
We have a Long History of Influential People Here are just a few...
Former Guests Sir Winston Churchill • Desmond Tutu • W.B. Yeats • Patti Smith • Joseph Stiglitz • Justice Antonin Scalia • Patrick Stewart • Rev. Jesse Jackson • John Hume • Noam Chomsky • Deirdre McCloskey • Edward Kennedy • Steven Moffat • Eddie Izzard • F. W. De Klerk • Michael D. Higgins • Jose Manuel Barroso • Bob Geldof • Bertie Ahern • Gordon Brown • Charles Haughey • Stuart Milk • Tommy Tiernan • Dan Brown • Evanna Lynch • Akala • KRS-One • Ben Kingsley • Pat Cox • Ian Paisely • Liam Cosgrave • Sinead Edmund Buke O’Connor • PantiBliss • James • Theobald Wolfe Tone Starvitis • Paul Henri • Oscar Wilde • Robert Spaak Emmet • Mary Harney • Bram Stoker • Ernest Walton • Shane Ross • Samuel Beckett • Thomas Moore • David O’Sullivan • Brian Lenihan • Mary Robinson • Douglas Hyde • F.H. Boland • Thomas Emmet • Thomas Davis • Robert Ross
Former Members
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Coming t A selection of notable to the Hist this year. pages to be up to date
Kenneth Clarke
Former Chancellor of the Exchequer and Home Secretary
Enda Kenny
Former Taoiseach and currently the longest serving TD in the Dáil
Baroness Hale of Richmond Deputy President of the Supreme Court of the UK
Margrethe Vestager
Current European Union Commissioner for Competition
Also com Martin O’Malley
Former Governer of Maryland and Conor O’Malley’s uncle
Al Sharpton
Civil Rights activist and former advisor to President Obama
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Eamon Gilmore - Former Tánaiste and former Minister of Foreign Affairs and Trade Joe King - Guitarist and Songwritter of The Fray Lainey Keogh - Irish Knitwear Fashion Designer Patrick Wolf - Indie Electronic Singer Songwritter
If you have a guest Auditor at auditor@ Fun Fact: the background image for this bokeh
to the Hist guests who will be coming Check out our social media with the news on other guests!
Moya Brennen Irish Folk SingerSongwritter
Jeb Bush
Former Governor of Florida and inventor of Jeb!
Owen Jones
Columnist, author and political activist
Jung Chang
Biographer, author of “Wild Swans“
ing are: David Puntnam - Acadamy Award Winning Producer of ‘Chariots of Fire’ Malcolm Schofield Professor of Ancient Philosophy in Cambridge University
Mark Carney
Govenor of the Bank of England
Sir Martyn Poliakoff
suggestion, email the thehist.com design is the 2016 Republican primaries debate
Foreign Secretary of the Royal Society and star of Periodic Table of Videos
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Getting Involved Maidens
There’re loads of ways you can get involved with the marvellous cult that is the Hist, you’ll be glad to hear. One of the easiest ways to get involved (and most fun, in my objective opinion as the convenor) is to sign up for Maidens! The Hist Maidens Competition is a competition we run every year for first time college debaters. It starts early in Michaelmas term with friendly debating rounds each week, with a focus on speaker development and having gas banter. There are five of these rounds with one round happening every week. We understand it may be your first time debating, and so we promise not to bite. It then breaks to quarter finals and semi finals before culminating in the most glam black tie affair you can imagine - our grand Hist Maidens final. For the first five weeks, speeches are five minutes long, and you get the motion a week in advance of
the debate. We’ll send you on hints and tricks in our weekly emails when we send you on debate times, and workshops will be run throughout the term to help you get your bearings. Maidens is a competition focused on development, so we pride ourselves on having a high standard of judging, so that your feedback is as helpful as can be. Obviously it’s great in terms of critical thinking, skills of logic and public speaking, but really the best thing about Maidens is the banter. What more can we say: walk up the steps into the GMB, argue with some strangers, and leave having found fun, friendship and maybe more. Who knows - you might just win the whole thing! Talk to Catherine, our Record Secretary, to sign your name up!
recsec@thehist.com
Catherine Kelly - Records Secretary Senior Freshman Business, Economics and Social Sciences
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Catherine was an alternative rock band from Chicago, Illinois that was active from 1985 to 1998. She then retired to a small hut in the Finish mountains where she composed a string of albums, all released under the pseudonym ‘Taylor Swift’. There are many theories behind the meaning of her work. Some say the album Red is is based on Catherine’s experience of spilling the blood of the bourgeoisie during her time in Finland. Others say ‘Love Story’ is about this one time she was perched in a pine tree in a forest just outside Helsinki and she witnessed an elk proposing to a reindeer after the elk’s herd had shunned her in a Romeo and Juliet type scenario except in Finish and with an elk. If you do happen upon Catherine lurking about at Maidens rounds or hosting parties in the committee room, be sure to ask her about elks, after all, she was the ring bearer at the elk/reindeer wedding and proceeded to live with them for 3 years as an aupair while she concentrated on her ‘art’.
Burke Panels Another mainstay of the Hist is the beloved Burke Panel. Run by the Burke Sessions Subcommittee, Burke Panels provide a fantastic opportunity for discussion of complex issues of the day. Burke Panels are a series of speaker panels held in our conversation room. Recent topics have ranged from Irish Feminism in the 21st Century to Anti Establishment Politics to Student Activism. These panels are so good they’re award winning, with our Irish Travelling Community panel having won an Equality Champions award in 2017. They feature both guests and student speakers and allow for an informal, constructive format to share and develop ideas. Talk to Grace to hear more about these, and keep an eye on our Facebook page.
Derby of Rhetoric Derbies of Rhetoric are another must. Speakers have seven minutes to talk about whatever they want, and often we get to hear about all sorts of whacky topics we might not have known about. It’s a great opportunity for students to share their passion, and for observers to learn about topics ranging from sharks to video game journalism to Eminem, all in our lovely conversation room. It’s informal and very cosy and a great way to get to know people. Talk to Grace to hear more, and keep an eye on Facebook to see event pages popping up.
Tea & Toast Have your roommates eaten all your food? Did you have a 9am lecture that you’re 2 hours late to? Is it only the second week of Michaelmas? Yeah, me too. Come ease your studying blues and join us on Wednesdays for Tea and Toast! We’ll be chilling in the Hist Convo room from 11am onwards each week. We’ll have tea, coffee, toast, and chats, all for free! Don’t worry if you don’t know too many people, absolutely everyone is welcome and it’s an easy way to meet other Hist members. Even if you’re not sure that debating stuff is up your alley, it’s a great way to get involved and see what else the Hist offers (even if that is just the occasional mince pie on Wednesdays).
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Competitive Debating
Do you like arguing? Do you love the sound of your own voice? Or maybe you get a thrill out of hobbies that let you tell people why they are completely wrong about everything in a secure and controlled environment. Then competitive debating could be for you! Here in Trinity, the Hist is the home of competitive debating. We’ve had European Finalists and numerous international winners in the past few years. It might seem intimidating to begin with but don’t worry, with a few workshops and drop-in debates throughout the year in the Hist and you don’t need to have any previous experience to get involved, just a misguided sense of hope and slight dash of self-hatred, and maybe some Tupperware for all the tasty discourse you’ll face. Generally debates play out this way. You get a motion (for example ‘This House Would Legalise Drugs’) and told what position you’ll be speaking in (whether you’ll be proposing the motion or opposing it). You then get 15 minutes to prepare your case. Luckily for you, you get paired with a partner to work with. Maybe they’ll actually know stuff on the topic, and you’ll do great, or more likely they also
know nothing and you can instantly become best friends though your absolute cluelessness. We send people to competitions across the world, to places like Oxford and Cambridge, Mexico and South Africa, as well as even more exotic places like Cork and Galway. They’re often two day competitions, when we all head off for the weekend to party, occasionally debating in between. If the thought of leaving the Pale fills you with horror, there are also opportunities to debate closer to home. We host our own competitions, the Trinity IV and the Trinity Women’s Open on the 25-27th January 2017. Even if you’re not really feeling debating, you can come along to volunteer and take advantage of as much free food as possible. The first competitive of the year is a one-day competition just for newbies – the UCD Novice IV, happening in early October, followed by the UCD IV (or maybe the UCD Law Soc IV) on the 7th and 8th. There will be sign-up sheets for the competitions in the conversation room (first floor of the GMB), and on Facebook, or you can email Julie at:
dc@thehist.com
Julie Davis - Debates Convenor Junior Sophister History and Political Science
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Julie Rodham Davis enjoys making bizarre references to Tupperware. Yeah, we’ve no idea either. Don’t let the random cheerful exterior fool you. Do you need a thing done? Julie is you Gal. How to get on the good side of this debating royalty you ask? Simply get her talking about the one the only, ‘Wonder Woman’. While she swears she’s only seen it in cinema three times, we know she secretly has it downloaded and watches it every night before bed. The explanation for this? Simple, Julie is *DIANA PRINCE*, sent to us by Zeus himself to help us get shit done. Warning: shockingly maternal and known to refer to those younger than her as her children, her true life goal is to raise us all to follow in her footsteps. She will not rest until we too can say we had the pleasure of debating about a baby Alien in the Maynooth Open final.
Inaugural The Inaugural Meeting is one of the most anticipated events of the college calendar: a black tie occasion that promises a lavish reception and an amazing night out in Dublin city afterwards. This event is organised mainly by the new Auditor as they lead the discussion on topical issues they believe are important to explore. Set in the second half of their term, it’s their chance to take the spotlight! They deliver a paper on their chosen
topic before inviting prominent guest speakers, often experts in their fields, to contribute to the matter at hand. Last year, the paper was on “The Future of the EU“ and David O’Sullivan, the Ambassador of the EU to the US and former Hist Auditor, gave a speech on the topic.
Butler, world renowned philosopher and feminist icon, Mary Robinson, first Irish president of Ireland, Germaine Greer, one of the major voices of second wave feminism, and Archbishop Desmond Tutu amongst many others!
After the speeches, guests are invited to a lovely reception hosted in the impressive Exam Hall, before heading out to enjoy a Previous papers delivered have been night out in one of Dublin’s finest estabtitled ‘Making the Modern Heroine’ lishments. If you go to just one Hist event and ‘The Need for Radical Approaches all year, make sure it’s this one as it’s a to Politics and Oppression’. Notanight not to be missed! ble past guests have included Judith
Schools Debating In the Librarian department, not only do we run the Hist library, that you can use, we also run several schools debating competitions throughout the year. These are designed to help secondary school students get involved in debating. The first competition of the year is the Leinster Schools Debating Competition, which runs for most of the year. Rounds for this are held every second or third Thursday here in Trinity and is co hosted with the Literary and Historical Society at UCD with rounds also taking place there. One way that freshers, as well as anyone else, can get involved in debating and the Hist is by helping to
judge some of these rounds. This is a great opportunity for new debaters, as you judge alongside both experienced and new judges. This means you’ll not only learn how to judge properly, but you’ll also learn how a debate is judged in the first place. This could come in very handy when you start to debate yourself, so is well worth doing! In addition, after the rounds we tend to all hang out together in the Hist Committee room, which is a perfect opportunity to get to know your fellow freshers, the committee and other members of the society. The other kind of competition that we run is called a Mace. We run two of these a year, the Leinster Schools’ Mace and the Leinster Girls Schools’ Mace.
These are similar to the type of weekend long debating competition which happen in university level debating. They are another way to encourage public speaking and debating amongst secondary school students, but the Girls Schools’ Mace also serves an additional purpose. As it is entirely run by and judged by women, and the participants are all female, it attempts to boost the numbers of girls and women involved in debating. Both Maces require lots of willing volunteers to help with all parts of the competitions running smoothly. If you’re looking for another way to get to know and make friends with other members of the Hist, volunteering to judge or help out at any of our competitions isn’t the worst way to go about it!
Liam Smith - Librarian Senior Freshman Business, Economics and Social Sciences
They say no one chooses Lib, Liam our friend was tricked into the role or at least, those close to him say so. He himself swears his support for developing the young debating minds of the future has never wavered. Catchphrases’ include ‘EZ MONEY’ and ‘Bad Hombre’, Liam can reliably be found in the pool rooms on the top floor of the GMB claiming because he beat you once he is the best pool player around. Liam’s obsession with recording History is ironic considering no-one can ever remember who Lib is. But seriously let Liam learn you a thing or two. Young minds need molding - that’s why he wanted schools so bad. Don’t let him enslave your brain! Run sheeple! This damned libertarian will try and give you your rights back!
librarian@thehist.com
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Events Hello dear Histlings, tis I; the ghost of Parties Future, Present, and Past. The Arts Block is where I should be, but the GMB is where I reside. When I want to appear as if I’m dedicated to this strange thing us Histerical people often forget about called a ‘degree’; instead of the bants, I wear glasses. So freshers, as you quake with fear in the foyer of the GMB, dubiously questioning whether you should bother with the crisps and sweets above, or get the Luas home to the comfort of your soulless Halls rooms - know that the Hist, this great, old and revered society - is a haven for all who defy social recommendations and bring up contentious political/social/personal issues in highly public situations. And I, Madame Ents, am charged with getting all of you to partake in social interactions. But never fear - reassurance comes in the form of this year’s MCs. Personifying the word ‘wholesome’, they too fear social interaction, ‘mingling’ and those ‘dark, loud places’, otherwise known as clubs. I hope this news comforts you - they too are afraid, socially improper and pretty much stuck on the first rung of the social ladder.
How? How on earth will I, a lowly Mayo girl achieve this? Well dear friends, the Hist is the perfect place to spend your Wednesday night after our debates. The best part of this weekly soiree is the opportunity to eat lots of free food. People will claims it’s the friend-making and the mingling that will occur - but truly the consistent reoccurance of custard creams and bourbons is what causes their return. Next step to initiation is bringing all you hopeful souls along to one of the Hist’s many haunts. Even though we’re the oldest college society IN THE WORLD, we often like to escape our Trinity bubble - be that to the Cork IV, the Galway Pro-Am or the Maynooth Open. This exoticism continues in a yearly trip to a mysterious location - will it be Prague? Berlin? Athlone? Who knows? I do - but you won’t. On special occasions we dress up - boys wear cocktail dresses and girls don their best suits. These times are when we look our best - and when we ensure the camera sees us as we smile candidly, not contrived. When? When will I see such beauty? The Maiden’s Final, the Hist Ball and our AGM of course! As well as all these classic events, you can think of yourselves as my guinea pigs for the new age of Hist traditions. For those of you who say, ‘’they’re not traditions if they’re new’’ - I believe in change. For the many, not the few. In essence, this year will loaded with snide remarks, witty banter and nights out. Oh, and discourse. Let us not forget the discourse.
Sarah McGuinness- Events Convenor Senior Freshman German and Sociology
Better than finding a rake of clover on a 20 acre site with PP, RF and good drainage. Isn’t it ironic how the first letter of the name Sarah’s parents arbitrarily chose for her is the same first letter of her favourite word - banter. Also, horses. Sarah’s from Mayo, which she scarcely mentions, and so becomes easily excited by all human interaction and the cosmopolitan lifestyle of the big city. If you’re ever struggling to find her, she’s most likely at Claremorris train station waiting for a train to Heuston or at Heuston waiting for a train to Claremorris. She’s got the “Besssst of both worlds, chill it out take it slow, then you rock out the show”. The show of course, being a horse show. You may not have heard, but Sarah likes horses. Sarah works with horses and Sarah rides horses. Did we forget to mention she likes horses?
events@thehist.com
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Membership Deals The Hist is a student-run society and as such, we know of all the struggles that a student has to go through. So we tried to help you guys out a bit, with every membership of the Hist, you get access to all of these amazing deals: Everleigh - Free in before 11:30, Sunday to Thursday Lolly & Cook - 10% off Blazing Salads - 10% off PrHomo - €5 entry Somewhere? at Workman’s - €4 entry Midnight Disco - Extended cheaplist to 1 am Fresh Cuts Clothing - 20% off for Fresher’s Week, 15% thereafter The R.A.G.E - 10% off Mongolian BBQ - ‘All You Can Eat’ Buffet for €12.50 (from 4:30pm Sunday to Thursday) Tangos - 10% off any tuxedo hire Zambrero - Free drink with any Burrito or Bowl purchased Zambrero - All Barista style coffee €2 IFI - €5 off membership in September, October and every Monday afterwards1 IFI - €5 cinema tickets on Mondays 1 Captain America’s - Buy one main course get one free (Mon - Fri) 2 Wagamamas - 20% main menu (Mon - Thurs only), expires April ‘18 3 Muji - 10% off 4 Tower Records - 10% off 5 The Boxty House - Early Bird meal for €15
And so many more! Éamonn Sweeney - Treasurer Junior Sophister Economics and Political Science
Known to his close friends and Shane Ross as Eoin, Éamonn is the ideal treasurer for the Hist; namely meaning, his soul is already broken. See it in his dead eyes, his slow broken speech, his night terrors. Sligo will do that to a person. Seriously though, you need money, Éamonn is in charge. Does he keep the purse strings tight? Well, he is known for… *actually being organised enough to bring in a homemade lunch* and still somehow prepared to get up an hour early and walk to college. Yes, I agree, this sounds exactly like the kind of grown up you don’t expect to find in a College society, but it’s okay, there is a reasonable explanation. Éamonn studies BESS, and as one, he is known for professing his love for all things free market. I guess the market does solve...
treasurer@thehist.com Terms & Conditions:
All deals are valid for the 2017/2018 academic year and with a vaild membership and membership card with the Hist. In some cases, a valid student card may also be required. 1 = Bank Holiday Mondays not included; €5 ticket deal applies to all regular screenings only i.e. not 70mm or festival screenings etc. ; €1.50 day membership fee will also apply to tickets for non-classified films. 2 = Not valid on Bank Holidays; only valid at Grafton St., Cork, and Blanchardstown restaurants. 3 = Offer valid in South King St, Blanchardstown, Dundrum, & Cork restaurants only; not valid on Bank Holidays or December ‘17. 4 = Not valid on Furniture, Not valid on Sale items. 5 = Not valid on sale or electronic items. All rights are reserved and deals are subject to change at any time. For full terms and conditions contact the Hist or the company offering the deal.
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Equity The Hist is a very diverse society with our members from all backgrounds, with highly varying sets of beliefs, opinions, and experiences. While certainly a virtue, this clash of cultures and lifestyles can sometimes be a source of misunderstandings and conflicts; as Equity Officer, my job is to prevent these situations, and to quickly resolve them if they arise. I am responsible for writing up the Equity Policy, which outlines the basic standard of behaviour expected at our events and the procedure for reporting violations of this standard. The primary purpose of the Policy, as well as my main goal as Equity Officer is to ensure that the stimulating, thought-provoking debating environment that is The Hist continues to be inclusive and accessible to all.
In simple terms, I want to ensure that each of you feels welcome and accepted within the society regardless of who you are, where you come from, or what you believe in, without needing to censor any aspect of your identity. I can be reached by phone, by email, or in person, and no issue is too big or too small to address with me – whether you wish to make an equity complaint, simply discuss something that upset you, or even just meet with me for a coffee and quick chat, I promise to try and help you out to the best of my ability.
equity@thehist.com tel: (085) 244 0750 thehist.com/equity
Maria Pachowicz - Equity Officer Senior Freshman Mathematics and Psychology
“Maria: You’ve got to see her ;She moves like she don’t care; Smooth as silk, cool as air; Ooh it makes you wanna cry; She doesn’t know your name; And your heart beats like a subway train; Ooh it makes you wanna die”. Some say W.B. Yeats himself wrote that poem; others say no he didn’t. Either way, Maria is well deserving of such an honor. She strives to make the Hist fair and equitable is it’s own equity violation, but she can get away with it because, well, she’s the equity officer, duh. It also says in the laws that everytime she enters the chamber, everyone must stand, place their hand on their chest and say “YAAS KRÓLOWA” and if you don’t, that’s another equity violation for you :)
Find us on: thehist.com facebook.com/TheHist.Trinity twitter.com/TheHist youtube.com/TCDHist @thehisttcd Tigran Simonian - Censor Junior Sophister Nanoscience (NPCAM)
Tigran is the most stand up, honest and open guy the Hist has got to offer. He would never do something so heinous as proclaim a specific intention to favourably alter his own bio. His integrity forces him to ask such daring questions as, “Why, Tigran?”, “For what purpose would I feel the need to do such a thing?”, “To seem more favourable to vulnerable incoming freshers? I think not” and “Are my committee comrades informed about my ways to a degree that I literally have to CENSOR them?”. Tigran’s amazing photoshop skills are going to be invaluable in coming years, namely when he has to insert himself into the graduation photos of the Nanoscience Class 2019. Y’know to make it look like he did the course? Most people in the GMB believe that a photograph will steal their souls, mainly because that’s what Tig feeds on. That, and an unhealthy amount of dank 5/7 memes.
censor@thehist.com
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Members of Clare Elwell - Senior Member of Committee Senior Freshman Business, Economics and Social Sciences
Clare is the best person in the 248 year history of the Hist, and the gun pointed to my head did not influence this statement of admiration. This feisty blonde will rip your substantives apart with her British wit but will win audiences with her American charm. These qualities are essential in making sure that all of the MCs are in order while also making them think they have autonomy. She is our very own Supreme Leader (well, to the MCs at least; she’s not my president) and we would be happy to elope with her.
Luke Fehily - Pro-Treasurer Senior Freshman Nanoscience (NPCAM)
Described by contemporaries as ‘mad, bad, and dangerous to know’, Luke is the sweet, sweet decadence of the West incarnate. He’s basically the British aristocracy and has been known to cry out for ‘800 more’ randomlyt. In line with his Victorian ideologies Luke claims that nature is infinitely greater than people - but just ask him how many innocent plants died at his hand in the last year. If you see him in a drug rug/sandal combo please call 1169-1922-NEVERSURRENDER to speak to a personal injuries lawyer that cares. The key to Luke’s heart? Take him to Starbucks. He loves the place, along with all things global and branded. Who needs rugged individualism when there are so many types of salsa? Alternatively, selflessly donate to Amnesty International, the Make A Wish Foundation, or the Tigran Simonian Fund for Tigran Jones, his charities of choice.
Rían Fitzsimons - Pro-Correspondance Secretary Junior Sophister Economics and Sociology
Little was known of Rían when he made the jump from Auditor of Polsoc to MC of the Hist. I hear we swapped Eunice Collins for him… quite literally. Rumour has it we miss her and he misses the power that comes from being the highest person on the ladder. He likes to claim Polsoc took over the Hist but we know he’s been a Histie in his heart all along. When he’s not attempting a coup of his old society Rían can be found in deep Caffeinated Conversations about the world at large. Have you heard of the Soc Dems? Rian has been an avid supporter since a tender age, that was until Stephen Donnelly jumped ship. These days he’s sworn off Political talk. Sure they’re all crooks the lot of them? In the mood for an insightful discussion? Just ask him what he thinks of the upper classes, I assure you he won’t judge your private school upbringing….that much.
Étáin Saoirse Sweeney - Pro-Correspondance Secretary Senior Freshman Law and Political Science
All societies seek diversity, and Étáin, songbird of Ireland, provides pretty much all of the Hist’s within the nuances of her own character. On first meeting one could be forgiven for falling for her sweet charm - a merry Leitrim girl singing of the innocence and isolation of her country upbringing. However, underneath this lies the Hist’s token impassioned nationalist and gaeilgeoir with a particular fancy for rants about Gerry Adams and Northern politics. I dare you to discuss the North with this charming angel - it may take a while so be sure to stay hydrated. UPDATE - In a shocking turn of events Étáin has befriended Ellen (a classic case of someone who blew into West Cork and now claims to be ‘local’) in an attempt to infect her with her political ideology.
Ellen Somers - Pro-Correspondance Secretary Senior Freshman Science
Despite the ease with which she oozes ‘cool’, fellow pro-corrsec, Étáin, is the coolest friend she has ever had. A total Betty and is always more fabulous than she was 5 minutes ago. By trademarking Good Taste™ back in the early 00s, Miss Sommers established herself as the exclusive IP owner of all class. If you would like to have verified Good Taste™ in food, fashion, or music please apply to Miss Somers’ office. Failure to comply with our trademark policy will result in a withering contempt, general disdain, and caustic condescension. One of few non arts students, Ellen is often found in deep discussion with fellow science student Luke. When I say in deep discussion, I do mean arguing about ‘mollycewles’, ‘elektracity’ and ‘the ability of an all-powerful government to harvest organs from living prisoners’ - whatever those are. We’re just surprised that two people from the Hamilton can dress well (Editor’s note - :( ).
Áine Corry - Pro-Records Secretary Senior Freshman Business Studies and French
Áine “It’s not glitter, it’s Glamdruff” Corry is the embodiment of the word banter. She’s one of those committee members that doesn’t keep track of the finer details of the term-card or the debating calendar and instead occasionally wanders into the committee room to wonder why we aren’t all getting ready to hit the town. A drama queen in every sense of the phrase, this gem of the society can be found either giving the performance of a lifetime in the Samuel Beckett Theatre or fast asleep for the whole day on the couches of the Hist Conversation room. Did you know that Aine spent her summer in France? So if some random feen asks her “Parlez-vous français?”, she’ll know to answer it with an elegant “Oui” and walk away, safe with the knowledge that she can now have an indepth conversation in French.
Micheál Ganley - Pro-Records Secretary Junior Sophister Law
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Mícheal, known as ‘Red Mícheal the Great Genius of Humanity’, is the backbone of the College’s Workers Alliance Party. When he isn’t attending Trade Union marches or fighting for the rights of British steel workers, he takes regular trips to visit fellow comrade in the revolution, Raúl Castro. He has been rumoured to be an accomplice in Kayleigh’s elaborate Cuban cigar smuggling business however, these are no more than rumours. After all it’s well known that Mícheal prefers to avoid the capitalist agenda and doesn’t engage in “yellow-bellied bourgeois madness” as he puts it. In addition to this, Mícheal’s hobbies include writing the next ‘Das Kapital’ and adopting orphans, re-naming them after communist heroes and raising them as the foot soldiers of the imminent revolution. His favourite colour is red and his favourite song is a toss up between ‘The Internationale’ and ‘The Red Flag’.
f Committee Maebh Ní Ghuairim - Pro-Censor Junior Sophister Law and Political Science
We have a PolSoc quota for the committee, and to fill that, we had to trade Eunice and an iPod for Maebh and Rian. Before her time in debating, she was a bubbly law and politics student with an endearing American accent that’ll do anything to brighten up your day. But the moment she walked into that ring, and by ring, the debating chamber, she became a lean, mean, non-consequentialist argument killing machine. So don’t get in her way, ever (She is really nice though, do say hi).
Niall Maher - Pro-Censor Senior Freshman Economics, Sociology and Political Science
Wait, you mean you haven’t heard of him? Cause he’s a pretty big deal. Comes complete with one jumper (beige), a dishevelled bag and is broken but, not refundable. Niall only ever seems to come out of library when it’s Wednesday night, so the Hist was a perfect choice for him. Without a constant supply of McDonald’s meals, rejection, and obvious gang signs this majestic ginger struggles to survive. You can make a difference. For just €2 a week you can help dig a well, where we can throw all the damns we don’t give about who he’s shifted.
Melissa Barnes - Pro-Librarian Senior Freshman Medicine
Have you ever felt second best? Have you ever felt outshone by siblings who are better at debating, more socially competent and can see better? Talk to Melissa Barnes. Melissa is someone who tried desperately all year to get involved in the Hist. She attended every debate, went to every competition and helped clean up the GMB in an attempt to prove herself to committee. Unfortunately, despite her best efforts, she missed out on getting elected to committee in the first round of elections; some would say due to her “abrasive personality”. She was sympathy elected in the second round to her eternal delight and hopes to spend even more time with the Hist this year, as she doesn’t really have much to do with her time anyway. But that means she’ll always have time to talk to you, so don’t hesitate to say hi and have your day brightened up!
Lizzy Younger - Pro-Librarian Junior Sophister History
Lizzy only joined the Hist by accident, as she was looking for the History society stand during Freshers Week and got confused. Then she was too embarrassed to admit her mistake, but the Hist were obviously more than happy to take her €6. She didn’t actually attend a Hist event until February, and even that was because a friend nagged her until she gave in and grudgingly spent an evening in reading week watching a debate about Hufflepuff whilst very tired. This was after getting back from a trip to Warsaw with the History society (the one she actually intended to join in the first place). Shortly afterwards she was “gently encouraged” to run for committee as part of the plan to turn PolSoc into a mere subcommittee of the Hist. She’s still not entirely sure how she ended up either running or being elected.
Conor O’Malley- Pro-Debates Convenor Senior Freshman Business, Economics and Social Sciences
Now folks, you’re gonna hear a lot of rumours about this one and it’s not all going to be as pretty as he is. A complete lack of understanding of female anatomy, a surefire belief that the one thing the working class truly needs is a wealthy white saviour (himself) and worst of all, the unbeatable and self-proclaimed depth of economics knowledge claimed only by a second year BESS student. The 1990s saw a new and terrifying question enthrall the world’s greatest geneticists - what happens when a pigeon is crossed with a man? Years of dangerous experimentation produced a hollow-boned, economic wonder-boy. Conor has always rebelled against the beast within, and struggles to quench his powerful desire for breadcrumbs. Now rumours are rumours kids, and you shouldn’t believe everything you hear. That said, everything you hear about O’Malley is true.
Thérèse Kearns - Pro-Events Convenor Senior Freshman English Literature and History
Don’t underestimate Therese. Sometimes she can be looked over, or not even noticed at all but that’s just because she’s about a foot tall and only graces us with her presence about once a century. She likes to tease us, by flirting with other societies all the while keeping us wrapped around her little finger. Don’t leave Therese around your boyfriend unattended. She’ll steal his heart with her bright red lipstick and weirdly alluring Galway mannerisms..
Aifric Doherty - Pro-Events Convenor Senior Freshman European Studies
Have you heard of Aifric, cause we haven’t heard of her either. This enigma can be found lurking around the GMB once a full moon, constant waiting for her time to strike and take down the whip speaker’s points. Trying to contact her? Good luck with that, as she doesn’t have a Facebook account, so to our modern hyperconnected world she doesn’t exist. Smoke signals might work, but it’s best to have a messenger pigeon on hand, in case you tell her to help set up the reception. But all jokes aside, she is a great person to talk to and always approachable, or at least that’s what I’ve been told.
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