CAROUSEL triple cities
free
september 2014
vol. 2 issue 9
living local. loving life.
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 3
contents.
editorial.......................................................................4 the broke issue.........................................................5 music...........................................................................15 comedy.......................................................................21 science......................................................................24 sci-fi............................................................................25 events calendar.....................................................26 art..............................................................................28 theatre and dance.................................................35 food and drink.........................................................39 film.............................................................................45 books.........................................................................46 bingspot....................................................................49 (mostly) fun stuff.................................................50 TRIPLE CITIES CAROUSEL P.O. BOX 2947 BINGHAMTON, NY 13902 Publisher/Editor-in-Chief Christopher Bodnarczuk Assistant Editors Heather Merlis, Ronnie Vuolo Creative Consulant/Calendar Guru Ty Whitbeck Advertising Christopher Bodnarczuk, Kathleen Klein Staff Writers Krissy Howard, Ilana Lipowicz, Rose Silberman-Gorn, Kevin Salisbury, Felicia Waynesboro, Phil Wescott, Nick Wilsey, Ahlpheh Ohtis Wilson Contributors Connie Barnes, Sage Dougherty, Melissa Mischke, Paul O’Heron, Amoreena Wade Photography Ty Whitbeck, Stephen Schweitzer Layout/Design Christopher Bodnarczuk On the Cover Detail of Endicott Boys & Girls Club Mural -Bruce Greig
FOR ADVERTISING: triplecitiesads@gmail.com FOR LETTERS, COMPLAINTS, PRAISE, DEATH THREATS, AND MORE INFO: triplecitiescarousel@gmail.com APOLOGIES TO ANYONE TRYING TO CONTACT OUR ALTERNATIVE EMAIL ADDRESSES- THEY’LL BE BACK SOON!
Copyright 2014 by Triple Cities Carousel. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any form without prior written consent from the publisher.
4 Vol. 2 Issue 9
editorial.
It’s that time of the year. Students are back and State Street is blocked off and someone puked on the sidewalk in front of my house last night and all of a sudden I have to wait in line for ten minutes to get my coffee and I’m not even sure where this sentence is supposed to end because I haven’t slept in forty hours and each word I type is showing up as three words because the point of seeing double is surpassed on hour thirty five and also I’m really late in sending this thing to the printer so there’s not even time to add commas or anything like that. Of course, I can’t very well send this issue to bed without saying all sorts of nice, inspirational things to welcome the students to town. Welcome, students. Welcome to Binghamton. I was one of you. Only a few years ago. The six cans of Red Bull sitting next to me almost make me believe I still am one of you. Yes, yes. I am a B.U. alum. Class of 2011. Poetry. Yeah, you read that right. Poetry. I could have majored in something else, and then perhaps I’d have a job that didn’t require forty hour workdays every month. Well, no, I couldn’t have. I tried majoring in marketing, but they told me I needed to take math. A lot of math. So I switched to poetry. Which was good, because I definitely ended up taking the easiest math class at B.U. twice. You know, Math 130. The one where they teach you how to slice a pie so that all of your friends get what they want. Yep. I took that twice. I probably would have had to take it a third time, too, but I bought my T.A. a bottle of whiskey the night before the final, and magically passed. Something something inspirational quote something something today is the first day of the rest of your something something for every door that closes something something. Here’s the thing. Binghamton’s kind of awesome. There are people that will tell you otherwise. Hell, there are national studies that will tell you we’re the most depressing, obese, least optimistic city in America. Those studies are full of shit, though. The people conducting those studies have clearly never been to Des Moines. We’re a city in rebirth. Do we have our issues? Well sure, but so does every town. We also have an incredibly vibrant arts scene and a whole bunch of creative thinkers trying to make this town a better place. We’ve got music and theatre and art and culture and food and breweries and all sorts of amazing stuff. And we want you to be a part of it! All we ask is that you don’t call us “townies,” and you don’t puke on our sidewalks! I think I’m supposed to put another inspirational quote in here. Screw it, let’s print this thing. I’ll be seeing you all after my nap. -Christopher M.F. Bodnarczuk
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 5
Photo by Stephen Schweitzer.
penny pinching.
The Broke Issue
6 Vol. 2 Issue 9
MO’ MONEY, MO’ PROBLEMS : KRISSY HOWARD’S TOTALLY SERIOUS GUIDE TO SURVIVING CRIPPLING POVERTY
I feel I should first mention how ironic it is that this September issue of Carousel is devoted to all the broke-ass ladies and germs in the house, as the “September Issue” of most fashion magazines is traditionally the largest and most ambitious undertaking of said publications’ calendar year. I am not sure if many of you know this, but I am privy to this information, as I now work as a high-rolling supermodel fashion wizard, livin’ it up in the big city (your girl done good!), and that’s kind of just part of the job, knowing things like that. But yeah, broke ass-edness. Before I was blessed with a career in being hot, I, like many of you, had to struggle amongst the little people [read: many of you] in an effort to earn myself some good, honest scratch. I wasn’t always sleeping on a bed of Louis Vuitton purses, using Louis Vuitton purses stuffed with other, smaller Louis Vuitton purses for pillows. No sir, I paid my dues with the hard-earned dollars of a million well-earned paychecks, working every terrible job from data entry to telemarketing to repo man’s-assistant, and every customer service job in between (times a thousand). Oh, you could say “I walked the line,” Mr. Cash... the poverty line! (I am currently attempting to make triple-threat celebrity status with the addition of actor/ comedian to my repertoire...and boy are my arms tired!) So I am going to share with you what I have learned along the way: some simple tricks to help you not feel like such an absolute failure in the face of financial status and material wealth. Let’s begin. I’ve heard of people submerging their credit cards in water, then freezing it all, so they have to thaw a huge brick of ice in order to eventually use the card. Fortunately for me, I ruined my credit immediately upon becoming old enough to earn it, and therefore don’t qualify for any such cards, so LIFE LESSON NUMBER ONE is: Burn financial bridges as they come to you, until you’re stuck having to pay cash money for everything. That way, you only buy what you can definitely afford! Or, just pay your bills on time and don’t be a scumbag (boring). This is something that I still do all the time, because these establishments have adopted the “crappy diner” philosophy of supply and demand: have everything anyone could possibly want, all the time. Fettucine alfredo and waffles? Done. Off-brand Swiffer wet mop and ceramic English Bulldog knick knack that serves no purpose? BOOM! LIFE LESSON NUMBER TWO: Shop at dollar stores. I suppose I should clarify: not the literal “everything costs $1” stores, but discount stores bearing names like “Telco” or “Conway” …or any such similar-sounding retailer that could easily be mistaken for a utility company or robot butler from the future. These stores have EVERYTHING you could possibly need. If this were that episode of The Twilight Zone where an H-bomb destroys the world as we know it, I feel we would all have a better chance at survival if we ended up in one of these stores over the library. Broken glasses? Got ‘em. Toothpaste, Tylenol PM, and almost expired Capri Sun? Aisle two. Shoes? Uh-huh. Shoelaces? WHAT DO YOU THINK?! If you can survive the apocalypse with $25 worth of toiletries from Telco, think about how the quality of your day to day life could improve! Which brings me to… LIFE LESSON NUMBER THREE: Peanut butter. Do you think your parents made you peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch every day because it tastes good? I mean, it obviously tastes great, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years, it’s that peanut butter is full of protein and cheap as hell, which meets both the “will keep a child alive” and “can still afford to buy anti-depressants” criteria, which allows a family to remain happy and healthy and fully able to deal with said child’s inexplicable climbing habits. I am almost always in favor of the generic brand of anything: the more irregular while still remaining technically functional, the better. But, this is one time that you’re really going to want to spend the extra $1.50 on the name brand, guys. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve found myself spitefully using a box of generic “cotton swabs” for the better part of a year, refusing to throw them out because “I already bought them” and cannot justify having two boxes of 500 Q-Tips in my apartment. I know what you are thinking: “but Krissy, this actually costs more money, are you trying to run me into the ground with your little Q-Tips racket now?!” To which I reply wisely: “silly child, you have to spend money to make money.” Or no, “silly child, you get what you pay for.” Actually, the racket thing is probably the best advice in this entire article, so LIFE LESSON NUMBER FOUR is: find a company that will throw you kickbacks for pushing their product, then SELL SELL SELL to the poor, humble masses like your pathetic life depends on it! In all seriousness though, it is not always easy being me, you guys. We are all faced with life’s problems, and some days I still wish I could just get away from it all! So then I do. I just hop on a plane and go somewhere really beautiful and simply leave my worries behind. God, it is SO nice. You should really do it. Supermodeling rules! But I digress. Without my humble beginnings, I would not be the person I am today. How would I know not to answer the phone when a Florida or Texas area code is calling had I not had the experience of dodging creditors for most of my adult life? Or that expiration dates are merely a suggestion, and not a good enough reason to throw out a (not) perfectly fine half gallon of milk? While it is true what they say, that money cannot buy one’s happiness, the same also holds true for knowledge and experience, as some lessons are priceless, learned only in time. Unless you mean college, then, you know, obviously you can pay for that with money. -Krissy Howard
THE BROKE POLL
Money can be really confusing- maddening, even- except for the people who are reading this from their tax haven penthouses, snickering lazily as they stroke their very tiny dogs and smoke cigars, or sacrifice children, or whatever disgustingly filthy rich people do. This past month, Carousel took to the webiverse to get YOUR opinions on money and the lack thereof. The following is but a sample of our results… a cross section of our maybe broke, but not broken, readership. (Compiled by Heather Merlis)
Who needs to get paid less?
Who needs to get paid more?
“People who aren’t me.” “Politicians.” “Professional athletes.” “The rich.” “Entertainers.” “My boss.” “Corporate executives.” “Congress.” “The 1%.” “The Walton family.”
“Me.” “Teachers.” “The poor.” “Minimum wage earners.” “Workers.” “Police, EMTs, Firemen.” “The 99%” “Service industry workers.” “Artists.” “Citizens.”
Servers:
100% 34%
Strippers: Gas Station Attendants: Mechanics:
32% 12%
Cabbies: Bands: Baristas: Bartenders:
60% 50% 54% 92%
Who do you tip? Like, really, actually tip? What do people spend way too much money on? “Bullshit. Plastic. Things that aren’t real, and things that destroy the earth.” “Cigarettes. Soda. Movie tickets.” “Charity.” “Education.” “Drugs. Tattoos. Cable TV.” “Maxi pads. No, seriously, those things are overpriced.” “Everything: everything costs too much.” “Cell phones.” “Cable, clothes, cars, and comfort.”
39% If they’re busking, but I guess that’s not panhandling.
“Lottery tickets!” “Save it.” “Spend it all on weed and sell it to some naïve high school kids.” “Chocolate and black beans.” “Shopping spree at Salvation Army.” “A Hennepin and 2 games of pool at” the Black Oak while listening to Outlaw Country on Sirius XM.” “Cry into it.” “Bingo night.”
Grilled cheese. Homemade lentil soup, baby. A whole bang for one buck? Ramen. Moghul Lunch Buffet. Rice and beans. Free food at work. Burritos made of leftovers! Beer. So much pasta.
Public Assistance...
“Robots took over my job.” “Sex, drugs, and rock ’n’ roll.” “Worked for a non-profit agency, run by a board of rich people.” “I need to buy things right NOW!” “Severe alcoholism.” “I had a baby while being a college student and am now a single mom.” “I’m rich, so there.” 38% ...never. Stealing is wrong. 24% ...when it’s from a big corporation. 16% ...when you are Robin Hood. 12% ...when you need to eat. 10% ...when you get away with it.
“Stealing is wrong, except...” How do you know when you’re really broke? “You reuse toilet paper.” “When you get evicted.” “Ramen.” “When I go to activities because there is free food.” “When I moved to Binghamton.” “I haven’t been broke in 25 years.” “When the four bananas for $1 cart guy is my dinner date.” “When you have to recycle condoms.”
18% Now that you mention it, could you spare some change? 14% No way! Get a job! 62% ...is for people that have been dealt a rough hand and are trying to make ends meet. 28% ...is for the American people to take full advantage of, responsibly.
Do you give money to panhandlers?
How did you get so broke?
Favorite bang for your buck meal?
29% When I’m feeling self-important and benevolent.
Favorite tactic for stretching limited funds? “Cook your own damn food.” “Medieval rack.” “Growing a vegetable garden. $20 weekly grocery budget for a year, suckers!” “Calling my mom.” “There’s a Jane’s Addiction song about the way I like to ‘stretch funds.’” “Sell stuff on eBay.” “Buy drugs. Sell drugs. Profit. Return to law-abiding status.” “Live below your means.”
You’ve got $15 to your name. What do you do?
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 7
8% ...is the reason I eat this delicious meal. 2% ...is for deadbeats.
Money is… Not in my wallet. What I use to wipe my ass with. A necessary evil. Something I’ve heard about. Imaginary. The worst. Disappearing. A fiction that binds together civilizations. For nothing. And the chicks are free. A tool of the Illuminati.
DITCHING DOWNTOWN:
8 Vol. 2 Issue 9
ONE WILD NIGHT EXPLORING BING’S BEST DIVES Photo by Stephen Schweitzer.
Phil Wescott Staff Writer This was supposed to be a simple article: go to as many area dive bars as possible, survive, and write about it. Instead, the trials and tribulations of maintaining a clear head as I gushed down drink after drink made me realize that the best bars in Binghamton are also the best kept secrets. This was not your average weekend. This was a flawless masterpiece of what you could call the best kept secrets of Bingo, especially if you, like me, enjoy a nice frothy can of Pabst’s Blue Ribbon on the cheap. After work one Saturday, I called together the power team: the reliable drunks, those I knew could keep pace and stumble through the background of dingy pubs with me. We’ll call them the Beast and the Babe. I’m not sure if you can call this a review, but we did go to all these bars. Nip’s (135 Park Ave, Binghamton) We started by walking to this little gem, in the hills of Binghamton’s Southside. The lighting was hellish. Their selection of chicken wings? Divine. Beast ordered the bartender’s specialty drink, the Pineapple Upside Down Cake. It was too sweet for me and Babe, but $2.50 for a can of PBR was right on the mark. It’s the perfect bar to settle in and watch a game of football. After the second round, we decided it was time to head to Johnson City. One cab ride later, we arrived. The Harry L Pub (161 Harry L Dr, Johnson City) The bar itself was nice, but there was a smell
I couldn’t place. For some ungodly reason, Babe ordered blackberry brandy. Don’t do that. Whatever you do, don’t order blackberry brandy, ever. Mercifully, the PBR was $2.50. They also had a badass fish tank, and a pool table. If there’s one thing about fringe bars I love, it’s pool tables. Oasis (153 Harry L Dr, Johnson City) Oasis is right next door to the Harry L Pub, so we walked. The sign in the parking lot read: ‘We like everyone.’ Encouraged, we finished our cigarettes and headed inside. The vibe was immediately more open and free than the previous, and the Babe glibly grunted that “the bartender’s favorite drink is Redd’s Apple Ale, but she seems nice, anyway.” We decided (again) on PBR, and enjoyed the spectacle of what must be one of the last remaining VJ’s in the world. Squiggy’s (34 Chenango St, Binghamton) Another cab, another bar. I fell in love with the bartender at Squiggy’s. In a different world, I am a girl 50 years ago, and we are walking down the street, drinking Buttery Nipples and sucking all the love out we can. The place was covered in mirrors and just off the main drag. Also, as one of the few openly friendly LGBT bars in the area, it was nice for me to be able to take my shoes off, so to speak. The bartender, hearing us say we’d like shots in the multiple, offered a dollar off, and we graciously obliged, ordering shot after shot. (At this point in the night it was decided that our cab money was better spent on beer, so we continued our adventure on foot. Beast and Babe were pontificating about the values of capitalism, and as I watched the cigarette she was smoking drip dangerously close to Beast’s hair, I knew one thing: it was time for
popcorn; it was time for shuffleboard.) The Brass Rail (180 Clinton St, Binghamton) There’s actually a brass rail inside. At least I’m pretty sure it’s brass. I had never played real shuffleboard until this bar. The PBR’s we ordered were, again, $2.50. A singular haunt of mine, I was comfortable relaxing in memories of previous babes who played bawdy games of shuffleboard, and the turgid guitar player whom I couldn’t quite understand, but who soothed my soul. It was the perfect place to break Beast. As he slowly lost the argument with Babe, I wondered why we hadn’t ordered popcorn, and stared at the pickled eggs behind the counter, wondering what they really tasted like. Abel’s Pub (65 Rotary Ave, Binghamton) For any Westsider who hasn’t been to this squalid, dilapidated gem, I must ask: why not? It is the perfect combination of encompassing and rundown, a mark only a loved Binghamton establishment holds. We ordered a pitcher, and quickly fumigated it. The crowd was dancing around and duck-tailing into any conversation that we tried to keep. The seating is cozy, and bartender’s quick and lively. They do have one rule, however: no twang on the jukebox after two. Kuda’s Tavern (220 Main St, Johnson City) Kuda’s was an entirely pleasant place to be late at night. Beast had departed, leaving Babe and me to fend for ourselves. Its location across the street from the newly opened Binghamton Brewery also makes it ideal. We entered and ordered shots of Jameson. There was not a staggering amount of folks inside, but we made the best of the situation by playing a rousing game of pool (Babe won). The
bartender was friendly and offered us a shot of tequila to keep us warm. We stumbled outside of the bar, and headed down the road. Callahan’s Sportsman’s Club (190 Main St, Binghamton) This was when my head hit the (literal) bar. The tender immediately came over and asked if I was alright, and I’m not sure what I said but a shot of Jameson later I was back on my feet. Babe was adamant about wine and I would not deny her that sweet nectar, so I found myself drinking a glass of merlot at the end of the bar. Nobody at the bar saw this as remotely odd, and a girl walked up to me and greeted me as an old friend, although we had never met before in our lives. The Belmar Pub (95 Main St, Binghamton) Technically speaking, we never made it to the Belmar in our revelries (although since we spend enough time there to be crowned Mr. and Mrs. Belmar by a regular, I feel as though it’s not cheating to include it). Despite its gorgeous patio, the bathrooms at the Belmar will have you convinced it’s a dive in no time. There’s a jukebox with a wonderful selection of music (including local darlings Driftwood) and cornhole on the back lawn. The booze flows freely and cheaply, and with live music on many nights of the week, the Belmar is one of the high points of Binghamton. The end of the night was a blur; the only surety is that Beast walked away with my pack of cigarettes and my lighter. All in all, each of these bars is a welcome escape from the rampant zoo of State Street chaos. I would recommend each and every one to any and all of you. In fact, I’d recommend that you go to each of them as soon as possible, order a PBR, and reflect on all the times you’ve missed enjoying the finer parts of Binghamton.
10% off with this coupon exp. 9/30
5 Court St. Downtown Binghamton or
www.riverreadbooks.com
10 Vol. 2 Issue 9
BINGHAMTON 101 COFFEE SHOPS
Brewed Awakenings 20 Hawley St. Binghamton 607-235-3336 A hip, open, airy downtown coffee shop. It opens early and closes late, and the food’s nothing to shake a stick at. Plenty of tables and couches to sit at, and they’ve got wifi, too! Eat: Chicken Caesar Wrap. Drink: Iced Coffee
Cup-A-Jo 1355 Upper Front St. Binghamton 607-237-5174 It’s a bit of a ways from campus, but this offers a big plus with the quiet study-friendly (wifi accessible) atmosphere. Their menu doesn’t offer anything too, too fancy, but what they make, they make damn good. Eat: Loaded Almost Famous Chicken Melt. Drink: Mocha Smoothie Cyber Café West 176 Main St. Binghamton 607-723-2456 The Cyber alternates roles between coffee shop, music venue, restaurant, and bar. There’s plenty of nooks for quiet studying (at least when there’s no music), plus a pool table and a full menu of food and beer. Plus, there’s a long list of specialty espresso drinks for crunch time study sessions. The downside? They don’t open until late morning. Eat: Chicken Sinclair Sandwich. Drink: Chocolate Scream L’aveggio Roasteria & Espresso Bar 101 Court St. Binghamton 607-779-1100 L’aveggio is a bit of a hidden gem- there are no glaring signs or flashy anything at this downtown treasure- but once you find it, you’ll wonder how you ever lived without. They roast all of their beans on-premises, old school: no computers, nothing automated, using just their senses and experience, fueled by a die-hard passion for coffee, to deliver a top-notch product. Eat: Italian Cookie. Drink: Cappuccino Nezuntoz Cafe 50 Pennsylvania Ave. Binghamton 607-722-7202 Conveniently located close to campus (but not walking close) on Binghamton’s Southside. They’re usually packed, but the food and coffee certainly make it worth the trip. Eat: Maggie’s Farm. Drink: Laid Back Drip Sip of Seattle 163 Washington St. Binghamton 607-773-4863 It’s easy to miss, but once you find this little gem of a shop in the downtown Metro Center, it’ll be tough to leave. Eat: Harvest Turkey Wrap. Drink: Cafe au Lait
LOCAL LIVE MUSIC PRETTY MUCH EVERY SINGLE FREAKIN’ NIGHT
The Belmar 95 Main St, Binghamton 607-724-5920 At least until the weather gets prohibitive (it’s coming), the Belmar is taking full advantage of their brand new backyard patio: there’s live music every Wednesday evening, and occasionally on other dates as well. They also host an open mic on Monday nights, and occasional bands/solo acts inside. The food cart out front is no joke: the gyros and cheesesteaks are in a league of their own.
Fitzies Irish Pub 9 Main St, Binghamton (Phone? Nope. Not here.) The dingier, divier sister bar of the Belmar, Fitzies tends to reinvent itself every few years. Once it was a strip club. Then it was a punk/ metal bar. Then it was a folkie bar. Now it’s returning to the punk/ metal atmosphere, at least on Fridays and Saturdays when they consistently bring in multiple big name acts with ultra-reasonable cover charges.
Blind Tiger Pub 4402 Watson Blvd, Johnson City 607-729-8944 A local favorite, featuring a full menu, indoor and outdoor bars, an outdoor fire pit, and a regular roster of live entertainment.
The Icehouse 15 Charlotte St. Binghamton 607-301-1190 The local hip-hop community can be pretty quiet, but when it does converge, it happens at the Icehouse. It’s a royal pain in the ass to find out what they’ve got going on and when, but they book some gems of acts (including, recently, Juelz Santana).
Cyber Café West 176 Main St. Binghamton 607-723-2456 Elsewhere in this section, we explain the merits of the Cyber as a café/coffee shop. The real fun, though, is in the music. They host an open mic the first Tuesday of every month. Wednesday-Saturday, there’s always live music, and rarely a cover charge. With a solid mix of local and touring musicians (including the occasional member of the New York Dolls or the Sex Pistols) performing onstage, it’s anyone’s guess what kind of music will be played on any given night: rock, indie, hip-hop, jam bands, folk, bluegrass, zydeco, afro beat, funk... the list goes on.
Lost Dog Cocktail Lounge 222 Water St, Binghamton 607-217-5393 Lost Dog Café’s late-night counterpart, the Lost Dog Lounge, not only offers up some of the best cocktails in the area, they also bring in quite a bit of music- for free! There’s always a band on Fridays, DJ Castle and Crae spin late-night on Saturdays, and assorted jazz shows are staggered through each month.
Extra Credit: The Beagle Pub, The Blarney Stone, Brackney Inn, Callahan’s Sportsmen’s Club, Chips, Choconut Inn, Cranberry Coffeehouse, Downtown Quarterback, Fountains Tavern, Galaxy Brewing Co, John Barleycorn Pub, Kingsley’s Pub, McGirk’s, Mosquito Lounge, Number 5, Lippy’s, Six on the Square, Thirsty’s, Ransom Steele Tavern (coming soon)
LOCAL GALLERIES TEN THINGS TO DO FREE CONDOMS! WHEN YOU DON’T HAVE A DOLLAR TO YOUR NAME: LOCAL MUSUEMS Art Mission Theater 61 Prospect Ave. Binghamton artmission.org
Free condoms can be aquired at the University Health Clinic, Planned Parenthood, and in baskets at many local bars. If worse comes to worst, they’re in the top drawer of your roommate’s night stand.
Broome County Arts Council 81 State St. Suite 501. Binghamton broomearts.org Anthony Brunelli Fine Arts 186 State St. Binghamton anthonybrunelli.com Cooperative Gallery 213 213 State St. Binghamton cooperativegallery.com JungleScience 33 Court St. Binghamton junglescience.com Orazio Salati Gallery 204 State St. Binghamton oraziosalati.com Spool MFG 138 Baldwin St. Johnson City spoolmfg.org
Extra Credit: Windsor Whipworks, Bundy Museum, Butternut Gallery, the Village of Owego, Sea Hag, 321 Gallery
1) Check out Binghamton’s First Friday Art Walk. 2) Check out Owego’s First Friday Art Walk.
3) Ride all six area carousels. Receive free button. 4) Hike the B.U. Nature Trail. Or the Brickyard. Or Salt Springs State Park. 5) Check out one of the area’s many free music or arts festivals. 6) Call your parents. 7) Beg. 8) Accept the inevitable. 9) Get a job.
Bundy Museum 129 Main St. Binghamton bundymuseum.org 607-772-9179
Phelps Mansion Museum 191 Court St. Binghamton phelpsmansion.org 607-722-4873 Roberson Museum & Sci. Center 30 Front St. Binghamton roberson.org 607-772-0660 Center for Technology & Innovation 321 Water St. Binghamton ctandi.org 607-723-8600 Extra Credit: Discovery Center, Vestal Museum
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 11
THE NEW STUDENT'S GUIDE TO LIFE OFF CAMPUS... LIVING CHEAP, EATING DRUNK, GETTING CULTURED REGIONAL THEATRE FIVE HIDDEN LOCAL
CULINARY GEMS (DON’T WORRY, LOCALS... WE WON’T TALK ABOUT THAT ONE)
The Beef 62 Leroy St, Binghamton 607-779-2333 Oh, good lord. Lots and lots of red meat. And beer. And sometimes some music. And lots and lots of red meat. Eat: Beef Hallo Berlin 55 Corbettsville Rd, Conklin 607-775-4391 No frills German food, except for all the frills on the walls (lots of steins, mostly). Not good for a first date. Good for a second date. Most definitely not good for a third date. Eat: Encased meat Mi Casa 58 Henry St. Binghamton 607-237-0227 Located across from the DT bus depot is the area’s only Latin restaurant. There’s not much for seating, but the staff is friendly and the food is incredible. And cheap! Eat: Empanadas Phil’s Chicken House 1208 Union Center Highway, Endicott 607-748-7574 The rotisserie chicken at Phil’s was voted America’s best by Maxim, the world’s most trusted source for culinary pursuits, so you know it’s going to be good. The vibe inside is very Grandma’s Kitchen, assuming Grandma’s Kitchen had a freakin’ balling buffet and endless napkins (and pie!). Oh, and a $7.99 weekday all-you-can-eat lunch buffet. Eat: The chicken, obviously. The Village Diner 255 Floral Ave, Johnson City 607-217-4134 We almost don’t even want to tell you about this place, because it’s super small and we don’t want to wait for a seat tomorrow morning. So, umm… they have Mac and cheese. On a sandwich. That’s at least 4 of the 7 deadly sins, wedged in between bread and covered with more cheese. Oh, and they’ve also managed to meld together spiedies and fried chicken. Nobody does that! Eat: “That” Fried Chicken Sandwich
TAXI CABS Courtesy Cab: 607-723-2000
University Cab: 607-797-5555 Yellow Cab: 607-722-2322
LATE NIGHT EATS TO SOAK EVERYTHING UP Binghamton Hots 128 Washington St, Binghamton 607-296-4687 Downtown Binghamton’s go-to source for everything piled on everything at 3am. We’re talking Hot Plates (just don’t tell Rochester that). It goes like this: Something starchy. Something else starchy. Something meaty on top of that. Chili and onions and mustard on top of that. And an individually wrapped slice of white bread to soak it all up. Why not? As good as Binghamton Hots is when inebriated, totally check it out during the day sometime. They’re kind of sort of actually a bit gourmet. Eat: Garlic Mashed Mac Salad Cheeseburger Hot Plate Kennedy’s Fried Chicken 159 Main St. Binghamton 607-235-7111 You’ll be there. You say you won’t be, but you’ll totally be there. At 4am. Stumbling your drunk ass from State Street back to your friend’s house on Goethe. So fine. There are worse places to buy chicken and cigarettes simultaneously from behind bullet proof glass. Don’t eat the mac-n-cheese, though. Eat: Jamaican Beef Patty
Grotta Azzura 52 Main St. Binghamton 607-722-2003 Grotta’s isn’t always open late, but it is on Fridays and Saturdays, making it the perfect stop for students walking from the West Side to State Street (for those taking pre-emptive measures), or more likely, for those on the way back (it’s the exact distance from The Rat that it will take you to need to pee and eat). They offer all sorts of crazy pie deals, and the pizza is of the round variety that many of our newly-transplanted downstaters are accustomed to. Eat: Taco Pizza Maryam’s Mart 69 Court St. Binghamton 607-722-1232 Located next to Sake Tumi and Merlin’s in downtown Binghamton is Maryam’s, an unassuming little bodega with stellar halal food. They’re cheap, they’re open late, and they’ll feed you for, like, $5. Gyros, shawarma, falafel… and so close to State Street that you can be there and back by the time your roomie makes eye contact with the bartender at Tom & Marty’s. Eat: The Platter
Cider Mill Playhouse 2 Nanticoke Ave. Endicott cidermillplayhouse.com 607-754-0962
Chenango River Theatre 991 State Hwy 12, Greene chenangorivertheatre.org 607-656-8499 Endicott Performing Arts Center 102 Washington Ave, Endicott endicottarts.com 607-785-8903 KNOW Theatre 74 Carroll St. Binghamton knowtheatre.org 607-724-4341 Ti-ahwaga Performing Arts Center 42 Delphine St. Owego tiahwaga.com 607-687-2130 Schorr Family Firehouse Stage 48 Willow St. Johnson City goodwilltheatre.net 607-772-2404 Extra Credit: SRO Prods., S.T.A.R., Darkhorse Dramatists, Summer Savoyards
CHEAP DATE IDEAS THAT ARE MORE ORIGINAL THAN YOU COULD THINK OF Art Mission Theater 61 Prospect Ave. Binghamton 607-722-6913 If you’re looking for Michael Bay explosions and Megan Fox cleavage, you’ve picked the wrong place. If you’re looking to show your date how cultured you are, with your refined tasted in film, you’ve got the right spot. The Art Mission is a small, independent cinema with two screens and an attached gallery. They specialize in foreign and independent films not shown in the area’s two other “commercial” theaters, with offerings that switch up weekly.
Club Bling 10 Alice St. Binghamton 607-748-2302 From the people responsible for all the fancy mosaic work popping up downtown comes Club Bling, the East Side Binghamton workshop space of Emily Jablon. Club Bling offers all sorts of artsy classes almost every day of the week, in mosaics, bookmaking, astrology, hypertufa, gift making and more. The dating game has changed. Whereas once you had to buy flowers and go eat French food, the new generation is all about couples-mosaic-a-bowling-ball classes. Chuckster’s 1915 Vestal Pkwy W, Vestal 607-748-7888 You know all those MTV shows where they do cool things like climb rock walls on their blind dates? You know, the show you watch and say to yourself “self, I just wish I could have wacky wild dates like that.” Well, turns out, you CAN have wacky wild dates like that. So long as you don’t mind screaming kids in the background. Chuckster’s Family Fun Center is a short drive down the Vestal Parkway
(going the OTHER way), and they’ve got a full array of activities, including: mini-golf, climbing walls, and some crazy ass stationary bungee jump thing. It’s only open through October, though!
Kopernik Observatory 698 Underwood Rd. Vestal 607-748-3685 What better way to spend a date than staring at the infinite abyss, quietly acknowledging your own insignificance while simultaneously questioning whether or not to weave fingers when you go in for the handhold? Kopernik Observatory (check out our feature on them on… umm… well, on some other page of this issue) is open every Friday night March-November, with limited hours in the winter. Admission is cheap, and the views from the telescopes are worth it. They also do free tours by appointment during the week, but only from 10am-2pm, which is quite possibly the most anti-climactic time to look through a telescope. Ross Park Zoo 60 Morgan Rd. Binghamton 607-724-5461 America’s fifth oldest zoo sits on a hill in Binghamton’s Southside and houses over 100 species of animals, including plenty of fuzzy ones that will make your date gush. Ross Park is also home to one of the area’s famous antique carousels, and the magical children’s wonderland that is the Discovery Center. The Discovery Center is an interactive children’s museum that you probably shouldn’t take your date to, or loiter in alone, for that matter. We suggest that you find a young, newly divorced single parent professor to seduce, if for no reason than to use their children as an excuse to visit the Discovery Center.
DAY TRIPPER: 12 Vol. 2 Issue 9
Heather Merlis Assistant Editor
The Triple Cities…more like the Traple Cities, am I right? It doesn’t matter how much great stuff is going on in town, sometimes it gets tiring. The good news is, you CAN leave Binghamton, despite its creeping yet relentless vortex force.
of our solar system located throughout the city! Far out.
Cooperstown, NY Travel time: 1.5 hours Located on Otsego Lake’s Blackbird Bay, Cooperstown is rich in history and beer. It was named for James Fenimore “The Last of the Mohicans” Cooper’s father, who was a local
to visit Cooperstown is Brewery Ommegang. Cooperstown used to be the hotbed of our nation’s hop production, and Ommegang is carrying the torch. Specializing in Belgian-style ales, their beer is incredible, and they hold concerts. Of course, there’s also the Baseball Hall of Fame, a place that, by some standards, could be perceived as the most important destination in the state. If it’s not that important
Watkin’s Glen, NY Travel time: 1.5 hours At the southern tip of Seneca Lake is a beautiful state park, with a glen so lovely that the village was named for it. Its stream descends gigantic cliffs, and generates many waterfalls throughout its meandering course. Full disclosure: this writer has never been, but it’s supposed to be breathtaking, and is the most famous park surrounding any of the Finger Lakes. It’s also a great place to fish for trout. But if rushing water isn’t your thing, and you’re more into dangerously fast vehicles, look no further- Watkins Glen has a historically renowned racetrack, which hosts, among other things, the Vintage Grand Prix. There’s something for everyone, unless you hate cars and nature.
Sometimes, you just need to get out of town. That’s what this guide is for. If you consider a trip to Vestal Parkway’s impressive array of chain stores to be a day trip, consider yourself mistaken. There’s culture! Nature! Glass! And there are even a few big, important cities within a car ride’s reach, if you are feeling adventurous. Take a gander and push yourself outside of your geographic comfort zone. Just don’t be surprised if you find yourself back in the arms of the six-o-seven before long. You’ll be back. They always come back. (Note: Travel time is marked from Binghamton. Sorry, I live there.)
vvv Trumansburg, NY Travel time: An hour and change Meet Ithaca’s less obvious cousin. (Or Binghamton’s much richer cousin?) Some of the stuff in Trumansburg costs a little bit of money, but may be well worth it, depending on the occasion. I’m specifically referring to Hazelnut Kitchen, an incredible farm-to-table restaurant. It’s not cheap, but it is wonderful. I got a soup there with an unpopped runny egg yolk at the bottom of it. How did they do that? Not everything there is spendy, though- there’s a great little thrift shop and an independent bookstore right on the main drag. There’s also the super-cool looking Museum of the Earth, founded by the Paleontological Research Institution. September 13th is Fossil Day! Bring your unidentified fossils, if you have stuff like that, to celebrate. The museum is technically located in Ithaca, but it’s on Trumansburg Road, so... If you do go to Ithaca, there are all those sweet gorges and cool houses, and the biggest health food store (Greenstar) that you could ever want to visit. There are also to-scale markers of all of the planets
ducing tons of glass, but maybe the company just really likes it there. It’s a short drive from the Triple Cities; check it out and see if you’d want to stay there for 140 years. There’s a lot to do, like visit art museums, walk through the historic downtown, eat at one of many restaurants, browse the cute shops, and GLASS! No joke, the museum is awesome- it houses glass that’s older than Jesus. And, if you want to take a dip in the Finger Lakes when you’re done, it’s not too far from…
judge and a fancy rich landowner back in the day. But James got a museum named for him: the Fenimore Art Museum, companion to the Farmers’ Museum. The latter is part of a working farm, and has been since 1813- it was James Fenimore Cooper’s farm! This truly is Cooper’s town. There is also, apparently, a carousel in this museum that celebrates the greatness New York State. (Don’t worry- there’s only one. We’re still on top.) But wait! There’s more. The most enticing reason
to you, visit Ommegang first and maybe the Baseball Hall of Fame will be a little more fun. Corning, NY Travel time: 1.5 hours Do you like glass, or glass-related things? Go to Corning! They have a Museum of Glass! This is because it’s the home of Corning, Inc., serious players in the production of all things glass, and it has been for well over a century. I guess it’s hard to relocate when you’re pro-
Utica, NY Travel time: 2 hours Utica is the Handshake City, whatever that means. It’s home to the Children’s Museum of History, Science, and Technology; the Munson-Williams-Proctor Arts Institute; and the Adirondack Scenic Railroad, which sounds like so much fun. There are also several parks there designed by Frederick Law Olmstead. Okay, this writer has also never been to Utica (I just moved here a year ago!), but judging by the sounds of it, it’s my kind of place! Utica has a burgeoning immigrant population, in no small part due to its welcoming attitude towards political refugees from countries such as Bosnia and Burma, who are starting small businesses and making something new of this post-industrial city. So, for all of the places mentioned in this piece, Utica may hold the most surprises and genuine cultural offerings. Utica. Who would have thought? Phoenicia, NY Travel time: 2 hours and change Phoenicia is a magical little village in the majestic and mystical Hudson River Valley.
A RECENT IMPORT’S GUIDE TO GETTING THE HELL OUT OF HERE... TEMPORARILY
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 13 They’ve got river tubing- I think that’s the town’s main industry, if that tells you anything them. It’s close to Woodstock, New Paltz, Saugerties, and Rosendale, not to mention Kaaterskill Falls, a wonderful place to hike, camp, and swim under a really tall waterfall. This entire neck of the state is amazing (the Catskills/Greene and Ulster counties); if you’ve never been, go. Visit the Shawangunks. Eat at the Main Street Bistro if you’re in New Paltz. If you want a real treat, dine and drink one of the 500 beers at the Country Inn in Krumville. If you want to spend the night and you have some dough, stay at Kate’s Lazy Meadow- it’s a “motel” (but it’s really much more than that) run by Kate Pierson of the B-52s. You can also camp at Peekamoose, in Sundown Wild Forest- the campsites are very habitable and a next to a trail that leads to Blue Hole, the gleaming pot of turquoise gold at the heart of this sylvan wonderland. It is a sublime swimming hole. Prepare to commune with nature and never be the same. Beacon, NY Travel time: 2.5 hours Beacon is super-hip spot for people who are sick of living in NYC. These people are probably families made of people who used to be artists, so it can’t be too bad of a place to visit. Check out Dia:Beacon, a contemporary art museum housed in an old Nabisco box printing factory. It’s also just a twenty-minute drive across the Hudson River to Storm King Art Center, a huge, outdoor sculpture park. Bear Mountain, Breakneck, and Storm King (the mountain, not the aforementioned park), are all great nearby hikes, and the adorable little village of Cold Spring is right there.
Like making jewelry or seeing cool beads from around the world? Visit Momminia, the best bead store ever. This is a great area if you want to feel just a bit more cosmopolitan than you would in the Catskills, while still being able to do some serious hiking.
um” version of Italian Ice, and it’s very good. Eat it while it’s still warm out.
New York City Travel time: 3-4 hours (but let’s be real: at least 4 hours) So, you’re on a budget. Hold on to that cash Philadelphia, PA wad real tight, because this little city will do Travel time: 3-ish hours it’s best to drain your wallet. But! It is possiThe City of Brotherly Love: take a train, car, or ble to get to NYC for cheap (Megabus or carbus to get there, and if you’d never been, you’ll pool) and, if you’re shrewd, have a good time be amazed while you’re that it took there withyou this long out going for to decide broke. Look to go. West into rush Philly is more tickets or offthan just a off-Broadway place from performancwhich to flee es if you feel after getting like taking in “one little in some thefight;” it’s atre, and get a culturally a day pass for rich area with the MTA to tons of Ethiget around. opian food, Don’t be and the best afraid to ask King’s Soup for direcI’ve ever had tions; conin my life. I’m Walking Bridge outside Phoenecia. Photo by Chris Bodnarczuk. trary to poppartial to the neighborhood of Squirrel Hill ular belief, people there are nice and helpful. and the surrounding “Hill” neighborhoods. They’re just in a rush. There is so much good Check out Fiume- it’s a teeny bar with great food; if you’re in the village try Mamoun’s live music (lots of music school kids in this Falafel on Macdougal, or Café Himalaya in the area), upstairs from an Ethiopian restaurant. East Village. For an international experience And then there’s the rest of the city, with the that puts Epcot Center to shame, take the 7 Liberty Bell and all that historical goodness. train to 82nd Street in Queens for some CoaAnd Water Ice! This is Philly’s “super premi- tzingo #2 tacos and cemitas, or get off one stop
earlier for the lunch buffet at Jackson Diner, the famous Indian restaurant. This is just the tip of the iceberg here. But, if you really want to feel the rush of the city, take the D, F, N, or Q train down to Coney Island, shell out nine bucks, and get on the cyclone. If you want to sit in front (you do), ride twice in a row and you’ll get first dibs your second time around. This city has the best (and maybe worst) of everything, so don’t be afraid to branch out and explore while you’re there. Montreal, QC (Canada!) Travel Time: 5-6 hours Have you even driven to Europe? I have. I went to a little country called France… okay, I’ve never been to France. But I have been to Montreal, and it feels very European, considering that it is only about five hours from Binghamton. It’s incredibly diverse there, and the food is excellent. They’re big into Portuguese rotisserie, and there are also French bakeries and tons of poutine (read: disco fries). The Plateau is a lovely neighborhood, and the old city section by the waterfront feels like old Europe. There’s also breathtaking murals and street art all over the place. The people there are friendly, so it’s actually probably better than Paris. And the drive there is beautiful, especially if you take Route 9 to 87 through the Adirondacks.
vvv So, got a day or two to spare? Get on the bus, in your car, or in someone else’s car, and go somewhere new! Have fun, be safe, and always remember to bring a towel.
14 Vol. 2 Issue 9
THE ART OF THE CARE PACKAGE: A GUIDE FOR THE PARENTS OF NEW COLLEGE STUDENTS made), toiletries, video games, movies, and Ronnie Vuolo Assistant Editor
Having been both a starving student (in the ‘70s), and the parent of a starving, and perennially broke student, I’ve had some experience in the field of care-packages. Way back during my first semester away at college, my mother sent carefully thought out packages of non-perishable foods and thoughtful personal items on a regular basis. Being the era before cell phones and computers, she also sent almost daily letters. When I was on the parenting end of the college care-package exchange decades later, I sent less regular, mostly slipshod, care-packages to my own son. With the high cost of postage, it was cheaper to drive the two hours to Binghamton and deliver it personally. Cheaper still, was the gifting of gift-cards. Consistency is very important. I highly recommend sending care-packages with regularity, as the cost of not doing so will be guilt-laden comments, delivered with a small and pitiful sniffle, for the rest of your life (I am currently in the 3rd year of the rest of my life). While all care packages will be sincerely appreciated, bear in mind, senders, that the attention span of your student is likely to be short. Within days, gratitude will be forgotten, and you shall return to your former status as necessary, but generally a pain in the ass. As it has been a while since I’ve sent or received care-packages, I recently questioned a few students about their ideal care-package. Interviews revealed some common preferences: money, food (including energy bars, energy drinks, candy, and anything home-
clothes. Male preferences included bulk packages of condoms, while females mentioned tampons (from a parental safety standpoint, it would not be untoward to include condoms in a care package for one’s daughter; whereas, giving one’s son tampons would be rather pointless). One of my interviews, with 20-something Dawn Cochran, was particularly specific: “Endless amounts of cheap beerpreferably Miller High Life… Summer’s Eve Vagina Wash (very important to keep proper pH levels), string cheese, pistachio nuts, pens that write nicely, Febreze, Clorox wipes, and toilet paper.”
A balanced approach should be taken to the contents of any care package. While the student may prefer the above stated “endless supply of beer,” along with foodstuffs with less than healthy ingredients (and an eternal shelf-life), expensive electronic devices (to replace the ones ruined at the last party, or unscheduled debauchery), or items a parent may deem unnecessary; the parent may wish to fill it with cleaning supplies, healthy snacks, socks, and school supplies. Toilet paper may be the only thing included on both lists. Homemade desserts are generally appreciated. They are either jealously hoarded or devoured immediately with, or by, friends. Your student will quickly learn not to open any care-package in front of friends. College is a rough time, for both students and their parents. A well-timed care package can mean the world to your student (for however fleeting a moment), and it can ease the empty-nest syndrome for parents, who know (for however fleeting a moment) that they’re still needed. You know the basics, now. Cater these guidelines to your own student, and get packing!
THE ART OF BEING FRUGAL:
A GUIDE FOR STUDENTS AWAITING THEIR NEXT CARE PACKAGE coffee, it’s much cheaper to make your own. Ronnie Vuolo Assistant Editor
Coming from a long line of people who, out of necessity, were frugal, I’m very good at it; therefore, I feel qualified to pass on a few tips for making your meager college budget go further. Of course, if you’re anything like my own adult son, you will smile, nod, and then go out and buy an XL designer coffee with a long name and a large price tag, just to spite me. So be it: it is the role of every generation to lecture and be ignobly ignored by the following one. Who am I to shirk my duty? Cleaning supplies: If you should be inclined at some point to clean your student hovel, commercial cleaning supplies are expensive. Vinegar, bleach, rubbing alcohol, and baking soda are cheap and can be used to clean almost anything. Instructions can be found online, and all you need are a few cheap squirt bottles from the dollar store. Not only will you save money; it’s better for the environment. Coffee: While it is ever so tempting, particularly when hungover and/or late for class, to stop and get a cup of expensive name-brand
the old union hotel
Skip the individual, tiny, wasteful packets, and go for a plain old coffee maker. Even factoring in whipped cream, caramel, and cinnamon, it’s still cheaper to bring your coffee from home, and you can spend what you’ve saved on beverages of a different sort. If you really need to buy coffee– look for deals. For a one-time purchase price of their hot/ cold mug, for example, you can get refills at Dunkin’ cheaper. Food: All those quick meals you grab on the run add up. Stocking your kitchen with staples from the grocery store (beer and beef jerky are not generally considered staples) is cheaper and healthier. Peanut butter & jelly sandwiches and pasta go a long way for very little. Packing a sandwich or salad for lunch will save you a mint, and leave money for more important things, like beer. Textbooks: Before buying used books at the school bookstore, check out the used prices on Amazon. They utilize numerous sources, including independent booksellers from all over the world. Prices vary widely, and depend on the condition of the book. I’ve used this for myself in recent years, often getting books with no marks or damage, all while a lot of money. Since most teachers post the required books in advance, all it takes is a little planning.
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September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 15
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music.
YONDER MOUNTAIN STRING BAND HEADLINES HANCOCK’S FIFTH CATSKILL CHILL
Ilana Lipowicz Staff Writer
We’re coming up on the last stretch of the steamy season, and breezy days and cool summer nights are bringing with them a cooler kind of festival. The Catskill Chill will return to Camp Minglewood in Hancock for its fifth year starting Friday, September 5th and continuing through that Sunday night. Whether you’re worn down from festival season and ready to kick back for the closer, or you’re too broke for festie-hopping and have decided to hold out for the chillest, you can expect what the name promises: a chill time. That’s not to say you won’t have the chance to go wild if you want to- you can do just that, from around noon to the wee hours of the morning. But with its modest size and the site’s much admired beauty, it’s a pleasant setting that saves the excitement for the stages. The festival is low-key enough that it attracts mostly seasoned festivalgoers, and many have been attending since the festival’s inaugural year. There are no day passes, so everyone who attends is in for the haul. The campground is unique in that it used to be home to a sleep-away camp, and the cabins are now rented out to festivalgoers in groups
of up to 30 people. Where a gaggle of children once played kickball and roasted marshmallows around a campfire, 5000 people, young and old, will be getting down to that jive that just makes us feel good. There is, of course, also tent camping, and most people opt for it, as cabin space is limited.
Five stages will feature music mostly from jam bands, although aside from jamming, there is no category that can hold the range of music that you’ll hear. The vast variety of styles covered can be seen in the headliners alone. Friday night the Boston-based band Lettuce will deliver a fair share of funk; the band has become a festival favorite as it consistently throws down a get-on-your-feet funk party. An hour later on the same stage, Simon Posford, the lead musician of Shpongle, will play a DJ set of psychedelic trance, which sounds like all of the music from around the world and across centuries thrown into a blender and blasted off into space. A trippy light show accompanies his sets, topping off a show so strange and mesmerizing, you won’t believe you saw it in the darkest hours of the night in the Catskill Mountains. The big show Saturday night will be Yonder Mountain String Band, who plays what guitarist Adam Ajila calls “a bluegrass version of a punk band or something- a punk version of a bluegrass band.” After headlining in 2012, the group is returning with Allie Kral of Cornmeal on fiddle and Jason Carter, who Ajila says is one of the best mandolin players he’s ever
heard- so you should be in for a treat. With the additions to the group, the band has had to do a little more preparation than usual, but we can still expect a set that has never been played before.
“A band that plays a different set every night will sound tighter… but we like to play a different set every night just to go for the overall energy of it,” Ajila says. Saturday night will then continue the pattern of late night electronic music with The New Deal, a jam electronic band that blows up the stage with just a keyboard, drums and guitar, also amplifying their set with light beams, which are fitting to their futuristic feel.
music “psychedelic funky Dixie brasstronica.” There you can also see Twiddle, who last year managed to attract a crowd and get them all kicking in the early afternoon. This year, Twiddle will play an additional set, during which they will cover the Grateful Dead. Several bands will be playing cover sets, including the Alan Evans trio playing Cream covers (this should be good), Turkuaz playing a Sly and the Family Stone set, and Cabinet also doing Dead covers. Over at Acoustic Junction, you can catch the local talent, as most of the bands playing there hail from upstate NY. There, you’ll also have the chance to be a part of the music making at the open mic that happens at noon on both Saturday and Sunday.
The Chill makes a point of having a Sunday night lineup just as stellar as the first two. Having made a name for themselves at the festival last year, Kung Fu is returning to kick off Sunday evening with their jazzy funk electronic sound. They’ll be followed by a twohour set from Electron, which sweeps together the bassist and keyboardist from the Disco Biscuits as well as the drummer from Lotus, making up an all-star crew of jammers for the second-to-last performance of the weekend. Really closing down the show will be the New Mastersounds, providing one last dose of funk before everyone shifts into recovery mode and gets ready to return to reality.
If you’ve done nothing all that memorable this summer, if it passed you by without a warning, a good live music binge at the Catskill Chill will satisfy your craving for whatever it is you wanted- fun, relaxation, adventure- and then some. There will always be live music, but there is something about this festival that brings out the best in the musicians, and in you. As Yonder Mountain’s Adam Ajila says, “There’s no time for that slow build up. You kinda gotta blow it up earlier and quicker.” If you haven’t bought your tickets yet, there are still tent camping passes available. And if you’re too broke to pay for it, there are still open volunteer positions.
Every single stage will be showcasing something not to miss. Over at Club Chill, you don’t want to miss Primate Fiasco, which calls its
The Fifth Annual Catskill Chill takes place in Hancock, NY, Sept. 5th-7th. For more info, visit catskillchill.com.
16 Vol. 2 Issue 9
DRIFTWOOD HEADLINES
ANNUAL ZOONEYFEST BENEFIT Driftwood takes the Ice Bucket Challenge. Photo by Chris Bodnarczuk.
Chris Bodnarczuk Editor-in-Chief
Anybody who has logged into social media or turned on a television in the past month has no doubt heard quite a bit about ALS. Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Lou Gehrig’s disease. This, of course, is due to the immense viral popularity of the Ice Bucket Challenge, which has quickly become the model for Good Samaritan-ism in the 21st century. It’s simple, really: You get nominated. You fill a bucket with ice. You get a friend to film you dumping that bucket of ice over your head. Hilarity ensues. You then post the video online and donate $10 to an organization dedicated to the research and eradication of ALS. You nominate a friend to do the same. If they won’t, then that friend is expected to donate $100 to a similar organization. If they do, then they dump their own bucket, make their own video, and nominate their own friends. And so on and so on and so on. An estimated $100 million worth of andso-ons later, the lighthearted challenge has managed to do what no fundraising effort or organization has done before: appeal to the Millennial Generation and its obsession with self-image and social media. While not quite everybody gets it- many participants don’t bother to donate or even mention ALS- the challenge has brought on a staggering amount of not just money, but awareness, of a crippling and often fatal neurodegenerative disorder. So much awareness, even, that many are left to wonder what exactly was done to fight ALS in the past, if anything. The answer is “quite a bit,” and evidence of this can be found in the nearby town of Maine, where fundraising music festival Zooneyfest returns for its tenth installment on September 13th. The first Zooneyfest was held in 2005, in an
effort to raise funds to cover the medical expenses of Endicott native Joe Zunic, then in the midst of his battle with ALS. Joe passed in 2008, but his memory lives on in Zooneyfest, which, at his request, became an annual event. To date, the festival has donated more than $190,000 to residents of the Southern Tier (and the organizations supporting them) facing life threatening illnesses like ALS. 2014’s beneficiary is Sara Brown Quattrocci, a single mother who has been battling the disorder for 8 years. This year’s Zooneyfest takes place on September 13th at Ames Less Golf, on Rt. 26. Music begins at 2pm with Chris and Lori Haun, who will be followed local up-and-comer Brenna Swanger. After a brief karate demonstration interlude, the music continues through the afternoon with the Zooney Band and the Gravelding Bros. The Falconers (more on them in October’s Carousel) take the stage at 6pm, directly before headlining act Driftwood. It will be a rare hometown gig for Driftwood, who have gained national acclaim over the past few years due to their raucous live shows and unique blending of genres- they are a string band through and through, but their music seamlessly blends elements of rock and roll, R&B, folk, classical, and jazz. They’ve been touring almost constantly since the 2013 release of their self-titled third album, which has quickly become a mainstay on national roots radio, and they’re bound to be welcomed home with open arms. Besides the music, Zooneyfest will also offer a full array of food, plus kids’ activities (Game Time Express will be present), caricatures by Russ the Big Guy, and more. And of course, the inescapable: there’s bound to be an ice bucket or two on site. The 10th Annual Zooneyfest takes place 2pm9pm, Saturday, Sept. 13th, at Ames Less Golf (2816 Rt. 26, Maine). Tickets are $15/ adv, $20/door. Those 5 and under are free, and for kids 6-12, tickets are only $5. For more info, check out zooneyfest.com, where you can get much more information on all the good things they’re doing to honor Joe’s memory and continue the fight against ALS.
the
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18 Vol. 2 Issue 9
SO THERE’S THIS THING HAPPENING AT THE ARENA ON SEPT. 6TH: BRO SAFARIWE DON’T REALLY KNOW MUCH ABOUT IT OTHER THAN IT’S A DJ, WHICH IS NOT EVEN REMOTELY WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE. THEN THERE’S THIS OTHER THING IN DT BINGHAMTON ON SEPT. 7TH: BLUES ON THE BRIDGEWHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE. BLUES. ON A BRIDGE. WE WISH WE COULD TELL YOU MORE. BUT WE CAN’T. THAT’S TOTALLY ALL WE KNOW.
ROCK AGAINST SUICIDE: SERIOUS ROCK FOR A SERIOUS CAUSE
Heather Merlis Assistant Editor The challenges and injustice of the modern world can be so taxing, we may feel helpless to cope, and don’t always know what to do. Sometimes, certain individuals, like Paul Tauterouff of the band Highline, step up to create positive change. He has organized the first ever Rock Against Suicide, a benefit concert that was borne of the tragic death of a bandmate. Carousel recently spoke with Paul about the upcoming event: vvv
How did this event come about? In June, my good friend and bassist, Kirk, committed suicide. He had a lot of friends. It really was a shock that sent a ripple through the local community. He was such an upbeat and funny guy that no one expected it. He had a contagious personality, and even after just meeting you he made you feel like a lifelong friend. Kirk had touched a lot of people’s lives through being involved in bands; he did body piercing, was involved in auto racing, was a US vet who served in Desert Storm, and also a part of the local biker community. A day after the loss of Kirk, a longtime friend approached me and told me that he had experienced suicidal thoughts in the past. He said that instead of just sharing a few “cute” posts on social media, that I should do something to affect real change and make a difference. He suggested putting together a live music
fundraiser to raise awareness about suicide, with all proceeds going to anti-suicide programs. So I contacted some friends who are psych nurses, and all of them told me that the Mental Health Association of the Southern Tier (MHAST) offered great anti-suicide programs. I contacted them, and they were really glad to have the help for their cause.
What kind of show is this going to be? It’s going to be a combination live rock show with five bands, fundraiser with raffles, and educational event with speakers from MHAST. This will be a family friendly event. In addition to raising money for the Mental Health Association, I want to help combat the stigma surrounding depression and mental illness, and to promote the message that reaching out for help is not a sign of weakness. Men especially have a difficult time talking to people about their feelings. Who’s playing? What kind of bands are they? It is Rock Against Suicide, so they are all rock bands. All of the bands are friends of mine, and musicians who Kirk respected. The bands playing are: Citizen 5, a group of extremely talented veteran musicians who play classic rock; Forgotten Sun, who do a mix of 80’s metal, along with more modern metal; Mobday, an energetic local original band; OCD, who play a lot of classic hard rock and metal, and a lot of deep cuts that no one else plays; and Recycled Zombies, who play a mix of originals and cool covers.
best tattoo artists and restaurants in the area, as well as gift baskets, and a fifty-fifty raffle. Who should come? Everyone! All ages are welcome. Anyone who has lost someone, anyone who wants to raise awareness about suicide prevention and help spread the word about the resources available to people suffering from depression. What are your future plans for this event- what’s your ultimate goal? I’m planning to make the live “Rock Against Suicide” event an annual thing, to keep awareness up and keep people informed of the resources available to them. In between events, I am going to help the Mental Health Association to promote their programs and fundraising events. So many people either have lost a loved one or know someone who has lost a loved one to suicide, so we need to keep fighting the fight! Anything to add? Yes, here is some tough love: everyone talks about wanting to make a difference. Time to put up or shut up! We have lost many people way too soon. Join me in raising awareness and raising money to help fund programs for MHAST. Like “Rock Against Suicide” on Facebook. If you can’t attend the live event, make a donation to The Mental Health Association at yourmha.com/ donate.
vvv
What will you be raffling off? Local businesses have been very generous in donating for the cause. The grand prize is a custom-painted BC Rich electric guitar. There will also be gift certificates from some of the
“Rock Against Suicide” takes place September 27th, 6pm-midnight at the Choconut Inn, 10 Quaker Lake Road in Friendsville, PA. Admission for this all-ages show is $10; all proceeds go to the Mental Health Association.
were just throwing oodles of instruments at their set and were switching instruments with each other after every song. I think a recorder got thrown in at one point. It was perfect. The energy was cool and the intellect was tickled, for sure.”
until multi-instrumentalist Daniel Michalak began losing the use of his hands from a neural tension condition. With so much pain, he considered leaving the band. At the time, bandmate Stuart Robinson had sensed things were beginning to fall apart, so he jumped ship. From 2009-2010 Bombadil was on hiatus, and Michalak was on the mend. This time off gave Robinson the chance to write his own material. Robinson later approached Michalak, and bandmates Bryan Rahija and James Phillips to help smooth out some of his songs. This was the test to see if the band had what it took to proceed with the fury that gave them their raucous reputation. Proving to have the tensile strength to continue, Bombadil moved into the legendary Pendarvis Farm, near Portland, OR, to record, yet again. This produced All That the Rain Promises (2011). In 2013, they returned to their hometown of Durham to record Metrics of Affection.
NC’S BOMBADIL TO PLAY FIRST BING SHOW
Ty Whitbeck Creative Consultant
Around this time last year, some of the Carousel crew headed south down I-95 to do some talent scouting at our favorite North Carolina music festival. Upon arriving at Shakori Hills, we were greeted by the warm whisky welcome of our gigantic Irish friend (and Mayor of Shakori), James Olin Oden. After catching up for a few hours, we headed towards the Carson’s Grove stage to check out Bombadil. Sitting on a hill, and passing around a bottle of Laphroaig 10 underneath a tree, James and I began talking about the bending of music. Bending, in the context of time period and style… the malleability of genres… and how Bombadil’s lyrics provoke a display of emotion in the simplest of ways. They have this infectious pop vibe that spans decades in the making. “What do you think of these guys, James?” I asked, as the Scotch made another round. “The first time I saw Bombadil down here, I thought they were the nerdiest set of dudes to ever grace a festival stage,” he laughed. “They
“I read somewhere that their name was taken after a character in The Hobbit,” I noted. “His name was Tom Bombadil and he was the rock star of The Shire.” “TOM BOMBADIL!” cried James, “Their music draws you in like a good tale,” he said of the band, coarsely, in his Irish tongue. “One could say that the storytelling is similar to Narnia or Tolkien, though their music doesn’t seem dated, instead vital and relevant.” Much like James, Bombadil are storytellers. With chiming harmonies and well annunciated syllables, the band creates wonderfully orchestrated and layered masterpieces, accompanied by a barrage of percussion, wind and brass instruments. They channel the whimsy and contrast it with darkness. It strikes chords on all levels. Bombadil’s history tells a story of a journey that once spelled disaster. While developing a cult following through touring, they recorded a slew of albums, released under Ramseur Records. The band had high hopes,
With the world’s creative nectar at their fingertips, and a sound that layers like no other, Bombadil continues to bring forth a style all their own, and a vocal delivery that speaks volumes. They are back on the road and with careful planning, they have decided to grace us with their spectacular stage show at Cyber Café West (176 Main St. Binghamton) on Friday, September 12. For more info and music, visit bombadilmusic.com
41 Court Street, Binghamton YOU ALREADY KNOW ABOUT OUR BEER. YOU ALREADY KNOW ABOUT OUR FOOD. NOW CHECK OUT OUR MUSIC SCHEDULE! live Bands Every Thursday At 9:30
9/4 Dr. EF & the Rudimentary of Sound Binghamton’s finest whiskey-soaked original folk rock from Dan Pokorak & Co.
9/11 Woodshed Prophets
Hailing from Sidney, NY, the Woodshed Prophets are a quartet of bearded wild men, hell-bent on world domination or self-destruction, whichever comes first. They call their unique brand of rock and country “power twang.”
9/18 Nate & Kate (CD Release)
Ithaca's favorite folk duo deliver a mix of heartfelt modern folk songs, humor, and juggling that add up to a completely unique and dynamic show fit for old, young, and all in between. And they do it all to celebrate their new album, “Here You Are.”
9/25 Tim Herron Duo w/ Steve Orlando
Tim has been a mainstay on the upstate NY music scene for years. He blends folk, jazz, rock and blues into an eclectic mix of American roots music. He’s joined tonight by members of his band Tim Herron Corp. & by Steve Orlando.
For Hours And More: Galaxybrewingco.com Or “Like” Us On Facebook!
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 21
comedy.
LISA LAMPANELLI:
Lisa Lampanelli, often referred to as “The Queen of Mean,” is coming to the Broome County Forum on September 12th at 8pm. She is best known for her hold-no-punches insults on Comedy Central Roast and undying love of big black cock- she has famously joked, “I’ve had more black dick in me than a urinal at the Apollo!” But in our recent interview with Lampanelli, she shared a softer, more introspective side, and told Carousel what is important to her these days, and how she wants to use her experiences to provide the world with more than just laughs while becoming her healthiest, most authentic self.
vvv I’m very interested in the fact that, before comedy, you got your start in journalism at Syracuse University! I actually did journalism until I was about thirty and the comedy bug bit me. It was bothering me in the back of my head that I hadn’t tried it yet, so I did. I was going to try it once and if there was no hope, I’d know it, but the first time I did it, it went great! So, thank God for the world, it worked! What planted comedy in your head? I know you got your start in the 90s when the world wasn’t dripping with open mics, and there weren’t comedy contests at every corner like there are now. Yeah, it was after the 80s boom… and comedy wasn’t really doing that much. I think it was just something I pushed down and I was like, “well, you know, I really just want to try it.” I had to get to the point where I got up the nerve to do it. I think whenever you’re ready, you’re ready, and you can’t force it before then... Just like you can’t become a nurse just because there’s lots of nurses needed in four years when you get out of college. I like that comparison with nursing. It takes passion to do both, because they can be pretty thankless and heart wrenching. Yeah, because with comedy you’re really not going to make any money for about seven, eight years, so you have to just know you’re doing it for the right reason. And I always say to people picking careers based on what’s practical, “I mean, you’re not gonna like it! And yes, it may not line up and work like it did for me, but if you don’t have the passion first then it’s kind of just really empty.” In your very early days at a comedy club in Virginia, the manager told you not to say “pussy” on stage, so the very first thing you said when you got on stage was, “Some asshole said I couldn’t say ‘pussy’!” Whatever you tell a comic not to do, we’re gonna do first. Unless you really, really respect the person. When we’re doing the Comedy Central Roast, and there’s one subject that the roastee doesn’t want you to touch, I respect that and say, okay, they’re volunteering to do this, it’s for charity, I’m obviously going to respect them for putting themselves in that position. But if it’s a club owner who arbitrarily picks something? No. I’d rather not work for them. When you were developing your act, did you start blue (profane), or was that something that you found along the way? Ever since I was a kid, I loved to
curse. I was a big curser. I just was talking like myself. It wasn’t even a choice. Audiences like when you’re yourself up there… when you seem like you’re being really genuine. So, if I made a huge effort to not curse, that would look phony and disingenuous and people would not be drawn to me. So I just was being me!
But you have a reputation for being a nice person off stage. When you talk about somebody like me, or- not that I’m even in this kind of company- but, Howard Stern or Don Rickles, people who get all of it out on stage don’t have to get it out in real life... That being said, I do have anger issues that I work on; I do get my feelings hurt easily, which I work on. I, for about a month now, haven’t cursed offstage anymore, because I decided offstage it’s kind of a wall to keep people away and I’d rather let people in. So, I still say whatever I want on stage… but I think we’re different onstage than offstage and it’s kind of nice to know there’s a contrast. I know that you’ve been doing more soul searching lately, that you’re looking for more meaningful connections with people. Do you find that your position as an entertainer gets in the way of that? I’m not recognized as much anymore because of the weight loss and haircut and everything. That wasn’t to make myself unrecognizable, it was just to do my thing and shed a lot of unhealthiness and unhealthy weight. I just wanted to live longer. I’ve never found the career, or the onstage persona, to get in the way of someone getting to know me. I’m the only one who got in the way of that… putting walls up, being too jokey, cursing too much, not being authentic, not letting people in, and I think those things are falling away now. Since the divorce [from husband since 2010, Jimmy Cannizzaro] is final in a couple months, I feel like there’s just a real certainty in me knowing that whoever I am is coming out for real now offstage, and it’s going to attract the people it’s going to attract. I need a real soul connection with someone. I need someone who’s very charitable and works on themself and has a strong spiritual base, and I just know in my gut that type of thing happens naturally, and you don’t force it, so yeah, I’m not worried about all that. Do you think that working on this personal stuff might affect your artistic ability? They say once John Lennon got clean the music wasn’t as good anymore. But who’s “they?” Who’s judging it? I’ve had people say to me, “Now that you’re thin, you won’t be funny anymore.” I’ve gotten more standing ovations in the past year than I ever had! And they’re like, “Well, Jonah Hill’s not funny.” Yeah, but he got nominated for two Oscars. Which would you rather be? And he also, by the way, is still funny… So, the fact is, I don’t listen to anyone… I’m a pretty good judge of what’s good and bad in my own act and in myself… I just in my gut know that I’m freer and funnier than ever and I think freedom is what makes you funny. I want to change gears a little and ask you about your LGBTQ advocacy. I’m not sure if you know this, but Binghamton is a pretty gay friendly city- Oh! That’s exciting... I didn’t know that! I know that’s something you’re passionate about. I love that you donated $50,000 to Gay Men’s Health Crisis in reaction to threats from the Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka Kansas. How did that come about? I was on Twitter one day and I saw that they were threatening me physically, so I got a little scared… I’m a wuss, I had never gotten in a fight in my life; I had never been hit or hit anybody. We got security, but then I’m like, if I’m feeling this kind of fear one day out of 53 years, imagine how people who are gay bashed feel... So, I put something out there: “… If any of those guys protest me, [CONT’D ON PAGE 20]
QUEEN OF AUTHENTICITY by Amoreena Wade
Photo Provided.
22 Vol. 2 Issue 9
LISA LAMPANELLI (CONT’D FROM PAGE 19)
...I’m gonna give $1,000 to a gay charity of my choice.” At the time I did a lot of work with GHMC. I figured that would scare the protesters off of coming, but they figured, ooh, we’ll really screw her over and send forty eight people. And honestly, in my position, if that’s what I have to part with to make a lesson to these people, that ha-ha, now you helped get gay people $50,000, then that’s fine with me, because I can go and do a show and earn that. So, that was very cool, man! I was very happy so many showed up! I joke around and I’m like, “Oh my God! I thought twenty were gonna show up and then fifty came!” But, it’s cool that they did, because I know that bought a lot of meals for those people, and it was just a good way of sticking it to them and putting my money where their mouth is. You’ve been branching out from standup. You’ve done some work on Broadway with a one-woman show, and you’ve been on The Celebrity Apprentice. Do you have any other aspirations floating around in the back of your head? The Broadway show is a one-person show that’s scheduled hopefully for this fall. I hope to do that, because it’s really a relevant show to people working on weight and food and body issues and addictions, so it’s very much about helping yourself and not stopping until you really work on your demons, and not just letting yourself skate through life... So, that’s a really cool show: Fat Girl Interrupted. I think I’ve achieved enough; I think I’ve taken my foot off the pedal when it comes to achieving. I think I’m done with doing anything that’s not fun because I have to… I could see myself in a few years saying, “Okay, I’ve had enough of this. How am I going to switch this over to being more about motivating people or help for people who have these problems and addictions and things?” I could see a shift towards motivational stuff, but that will just develop as I go along without forcing it. What can audiences expect when you come to the Broome County Forum September 12th? I’m doing a new one-hour special; I haven’t done one of them in about three years. I just put it together, so it’s 100% new material no one’s ever seen on TV… and it’s so good! It’s all really personal, it’s all about the divorce, it’s all about the weight loss, and this journey… Oh! And a lot about The Apprentice! I’m really excited because I think this is the most genuine so far. I really like it!
vvv Lisa Lampanelli takes the stage at Binghamton’s Forum Theatre (236 Washington St.) at 8pm on Friday, September 12th. Tickets range from $35-$65, and can be purchased at the Arena Box Office or online through Ticketmaster. For more info on Lisa Lampanelli, check out insultcomic.com.
THE SECOND ANNUAL BINGHAMTON
COMEDY AND ARTS FESTIVAL: 3 days. 5 venues. 10 shows. 40+ comics: Following the resounding success of last year’s inaugural run, Binghamton Comedy is at it again, presenting the 2nd annual Comedy & Arts Fest, 2/12-9-14. Headlining the multi-location event is stand-up comic Kurt Metzger. Familiar to anyone who’s watched Comedy Central recently, he’ll be doing back to back sets on Friday night. Festival organizer Kevin Salisbury will also perform over the course of the weekend, as will a slew of other local and touring comedians, including Tim Joyce, Brock Shields, and Anna Phillips. And there’s more than just comedy: local musicians and artists will be performing and exhibiting throughout the festival as well. Tickets will be sold at the door on a set by set basis, with cost ranging from $7-$20 per show. To order in advance or to find out much, much more information about the festival and performers, check out binghamtoncomedy.com.
THE COMEDIANS:
Kurt Metzger, Kevin Salisbury, Tim Joyce, Puzzled Players, Annie Lin, Josh Soldiers, Steve Burke, Jessica Sager, Brock Shields, Samantha Ruddy, Mike Hollan, Jim Mencel, Casey Salengo, Lauren Turczak, Steve O’Connell, Sarah Benson, Zak Marshall, Steven Rogers, Phil Farda, Aaron Friedman, T. Blunt, Mike Amory, Darian Lusk, Jerry Morgan, Francisco Ruben Arce, Corey Smithson, Vinnie Paulino, Woody Battaglia, Evan Roberts, Mo Haskins, Mr. Jaxn, Brian Bargainer, Erin Judge, Jaye McBride, Anna Phillips, Ernesto Galano, Mike Carrol, Michael Lamantia, Teshawn Banks, Jeremy Kaplowitz, Will Phillips, Jimmy LeChase, AJ Foster, Jon Tenace, Valdaniel, Kaytlin Bailey
THE MUSICIANS:
Blizz the Illest, Dan Pokorak, Dirt Farm, More TBA
THE ARTISTS: Neal Nixon and Amara, more TBA
THE VENUES:
The Bundy Museum, Binghamton Doubletree, Galaxy Brewing Co., Matty B’s, Old Union Hotel
THE TICKETS: $7-$20 (online or at the door)
ALL THE INFO WE WOULD HAVE TOLD YOU IF OUR COMPUTER HADN’T FRIED: binghamtoncomedy.com
HERE WE ARE, NOW ENTERTAIN US
CYBER CAFE WEST
BINGHAMTON’S HOME FOR LIVE MUSIC
9/12 BOMBADIL 9/20 TAINA ASILI y la BANDA REBELDE 9/24 POCKET VINYL BANDS.
176
BEERS.
MAIN
COFFEE.
FOOD.
STREET
24 Vol. 2 Issue 9
science.
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KOPERNIK OBSERVATORY 1044 McCormick Rd. Brackney, PA Kopernik Observatory, from a great distance. Photo via NASA.
Melissa Mischke Contributing Writer
Kopernik. Perhaps you’ve seen signs inscribed with the name, while on rides through the back hills for cheaper commodities beyond the border. Your brain made note of it: Kopernik, sounds like Copernicus, who mapped the universe with the Sun at its center. Or was that Galileo? You may even know the full name, Kopernik Observatory & Science Center, and you may even imagine Kopernik: a place to see stars a bit higher up, reclining under a transparent dome. You’ll visit eventually, this mysterious Kopernik. Maybe when you fall in love. But not yet. Not today. It was indeed Copernicus who put forth the radical proposal that the Sun lay at the Universe’s center- NOT Galileo- and thus, it was Copernicus who relegated Earth to just another planet revolving around the Sun. He was born Mikola Kopernik in 1473, and on the 500th anniversary of his birth, the Polish Community of these Triple Cities built the observatory as a living memorial to commemorate this revolutionary scientist from the Kingdom of Poland. Forty years since its inception, Kopernik has become one of the finest public observatories in the northeast. Its facilities include: three observatory telescopes the size of rocket ships, a solar heliostat to view explosions on the Sun’s surface, a weather station, a photovoltaic array generating solar power, a photographic darkroom, and an amateur radio station which tunes to the International Space Station and the Moon. Every Friday evening, March through November, a series
of public programs feature presentations by prominent community members, professors, scientists, and even NASA astronauts, on topics spanning from “The Physics of Music” to “Preparing New York’s Communities for Climate Change.” Kopernik will see students from every school in Broome County this year, and KoperniKids, a Pre-K program for children ages 3-6, offers a fun, hands-on approach to science, technology, engineering, and math. “We want to inspire kids to go a little deeper,” observatory director Drew Deskur says. “We want them thinking and experimenting and playing with science and technology. That’s really our goal, to get kids to think of this more as play as opposed to schoolwork. And hopefully it will lead them toward a career where that’s what they do and they still think of it as play.”
What if Carl Sagan had not invited seventeen year old Neil deGrasse Tyson to his office in Ithaca that snowy day? Who can say what seeing the rings of Saturn or witnessing an image born in the waters of the darkroom propels in young minds? “Science is everywhere. That’s what we hope to do: to get kids to see that science is everywhere. And that it’s really cool.” Drew Deskur smiled. “We hope it will generate a few more astronauts and T.G. Watsons and George F. Johnsons of the world.” The Kopernik Observatory & Science Center will hold its 40th Anniversary Gala Fundraiser on September 13th in the Mandela room at Binghamton University. All proceeds benefit educational programs at Kopernik. Cocktail hour begins at 6pm and dinner will be followed by a lecture by keynote speaker and NASA Astronaut Douglas Wheelock, a native of Windsor. Tickets are $50, and can be reserved through kopernik.org.
JUST 10 MILES FROM DOWNTOWN BINGHAMTON
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 25
sci-fi.
Photo Provided.
Rober-con
sci-fi convention returns for a second year A boy, standing on the sidelines of a milling crowd, pressed the button to go upstairs at the Roberson Museum & Science Center last year. When the elevator door glided open, to his amazement and delight, out walked Godzilla. It was the first Roberson Science Fiction Convention: RoberCon. “That’s the thing,” says Jason Fiume, the museum’s marketing and public relations manager, speaking of RoberCon: “you turn the corner, and you’re not sure what you’re going to run into.” Fiume reports that planners for that first convention expected perhaps 600 attendees- tops. More than double that number showed up. That was when they realized it needed to be more than just a one-day event. “You really got a feeling for people’s creativity, their involvement and interest in things, and it looked like they were just having a good time. Providing that unique experience is something Roberson is happy to do– to go outside the box of what people might think a museum would present.” This year the convention has expanded to a full weekend. Attendees have the choice of purchasing an admission badge for a single day, or both days. A pass may also be purchased for the bonus VIP Reception & Film Screening on Saturday evening, whether or not you attend any other portion of RoberCon. As it says on Roberson’s website, the convention welcomes “all parties with an interest in anything Sci-Fi,” and Fiume makes it clear that this runs the gamut from Star Wars and Star Trek, to anime, gaming, literature, fantasy films & television, comics, and so on. It’s all there. One thing that makes “RoberCon” stand out from other conventions is location. While a typical convention takes place in a convention hall, or the event area of a hotel, “RoberCon” activities happen on all three floors of the museum, as well as all three floors of the historic Roberson Mansion. “We host fans of every age, size and imagination,” Jason adds, so the museum’s education director is conducting guided activities for the younger attendees. And don’t forget the 55-seat Digital Planetarium, for astronomical trips around the galaxy. While the majority of people visiting the convention dress normally, many guests come in costume. Some choose to sport free-style creations, while others parade in ”cosplay,” an eye-catching sort of performance art, in which the wearer creates a representation of an existing character. A costume judging will add drama on the second day (despite the erotic allure often demonstrated in cosplay attire, particularly when tied to anime, the Museum assures that family-friendliness, and a PG-rating, is the order of the day). The convention is dotted with costume displays, fan group displays, gaming opportunities, a lively merchant area, and panel discussions galore, featuring various guests of honor. The Emmy-winning visual effects supervisor, with the evocative name Rocco Passionino, scheduled a trip home from the environs of Hollywood for the “RoberCon” weekend. Passionino was part of one of the gang-like assemblies that audiences see congregated on stage, in evening wear, at the Emmy Awards, where (in 2003) he accepted the award for Outstanding Special Visual Effects for an episode of the TV series Firefly. He has created effects for familiar projects such as: Titanic, Spider-Man 2, and the recent ABC series Resurrection. The Museum invited the Vestal-born native to be Media Guest of Honor, and to bring his expertise to panel discussions on both days of convention. Roberson is culling authors, artists, and other pundits to be guests of honor in the areas of literature, gaming, trends in science fiction, and more. Few attendees come from as far away as Passionino, but as RoberCon does attract visitors from neighboring states, Roberson partnered with Holiday Inn to offer discounted room rates for out-of-town vendors, and guests who want to make it a weekend getaway. Local business owner Tawna Lewis, of Johnson City’s Fat Cat Comics, attends the convention with the serious intent of vending merchandise, though she cannot help but laud “RoberCon” as “loads of fun.” It gives her a chance to reunite with some of the like-minded people she doesn’t see often. “First of all,” she muses, “you’re supporting the museum. Second of all, you’re supporting the community.” As a practical business person, she adds, “I tried very hard to have a nice selection of what we sell in the store, so that people got a good idea of what they would find if they came to Fat Cat.” As a fan, she declares, “The costumes were amazing!” Of course what could be more super-natural for a science fiction convention in Binghamton, than the touch of one of its favorite sons, Rod Serling? In conjunction with Binghamton High School’s Helen Foley Theatre, Roberson will also present a Saturday night VIP Reception, consisting of light refreshments and mingling, followed by a screening of the 1968 film Planet of the Apes - the classic sci-fi film (co-written by Serling) that spawned a lineage of sequels and derivatives. Public relations manager Fiume sums up the convention’s freedom of spirit with the tongue-in-cheek proclamation, “Let your geek flag fly at RoberCon!” RoberCon: The Roberson Science Fiction Convention takes place Saturday, September 27th, and Sunday, September 28th, 10am to 5pm at the Roberson Museum & Science Center, 30 Front Street, Binghamton. Single-day Admission Badges are $10. Weekend Admission Badges are $16. General Admission for the VIP Reception, 6:30pm Saturday, is $5 adults, $3 children, under 12 free. All prices are discounted for Roberson members. For further information visit roberson.org, or call 607-772-0660.
by felicia waynesboro
28 Vol. 2 Issue 9
BRUCE GREIG: A BIGGER CANVAS
the local mural artist sits down with carousel to talk painting, process, and why bridges shouldn’t be made of cheese
by nick wilsey
Mural at Cyber Cafe West.
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 29
New Zealand native Bruce Greig has worked on an estimated 500 murals over the last thirty years. He has airbrushed and painted signs on: airplanes, customized trucks, and motorhomes; and has designed climbing walls, and movie sets for features including King Kong and Lord of the Rings. Now living and working in Binghamton; his work appears throughout the region, including at the Endicott Boys & Girls Club, Ross Park Zoo and, oddly enough, the Water Street parking ramp. Bruce recently agreed to let me pick his brain about his experience as a muralist:
routine when you’re working on a mural? Do you smoke a lot of cigarettes? Listen to Wu-Tang Clan? Do you work in fugues or make steady progress? No,
or two, no more. In all my 36 years painting professionally, I don’t think I’ve ever come across two murals that I used the same technique on. Some are big and hard lines, which
I quit smoking a year ago and love being free. I spend a lot of time on design: going over and over. Being a commercial mural artist for years means I have to paint what I’m told, to a degree, and it’s not always pretty. Some years ago, I worked for a maker of garden hose fixtures who wanted a mural depicting his product. Yay, a bunch of orange plastic couplings! So, designs like that are a challenge. Other times, the client has a specific picture, and I just reproduce it as is. But the jobs I love are, of course, the more “art” jobs. I’ll spend at least half the time just doing designs, because, of course, a good design done quickly will look
I’d do with a brush, others are big and impressionist, so I’d use a spray gun. Indoor, vehicles, I painted onto a live elephant once. I had to shave it first, so my brushes could get to its skin. So, while all murals are the same, they’re all different too, and I always spend time working out how to get the best look for different designs before I start. I have done a dozen or so really big jobs that would take a month or two. Usually, I don’t get bored at all, as I get so engrossed in my work. I resent it when the sun goes, and I have to stop. But I did do a whole factory as a mural, on the outside. A commercial artist designed it, and
As a mural artist, I imagine your work must involve grappling with the image, shape, and context already contained in the surface you’re working with. Less static than blank canvas, a wall already has a presence, history and life. In your mural work, is it more like disinterring the images from their surface, or burying the surface in your images? Is it more cooperation, or confrontation? I see all walls as a blank canvas. I like to completely paint everything- even windows if I can get away with it. There’s something dramatic about covering everything- it looks more total, and says “stuff you wall, you’re art now, so get used to it.” It always amazes me how I get away with it, but everything disappears: doors, pipes, cracks. None of it matters when it’s wearing art. Having said that, I love brick. For some reason, brick defines the finished look and always works. It’s harder to paint on, but rewarding. I guess I’m saying it’s a confrontation- the wall must die and be reborn, so we can see the new reality. However, I do like getting an old Bruce Greig working on a new mural for the Ross Park Zoo. Photo by Stephen Schweitzer. wall and just adding to it- not often my work is able to go that way. That’s better than a bad design, no matter how long it was the whole exterior covered in cookies. because the best old walls need to be repaint- you try. And for that, I use any and every tool Each one about six foot, and I guess 500. It ed, or, of course, the art won’t last. So it’s available… but, of course, Photoshop is price- was so repetitious that I did get bored, so I more the unpaid art that I can do that on, and less. took a radio, and had coffee breaks whenever it doesn’t last more than three or four years. I wanted. It was worth it in the end. I smoked Once the design is all okayed by everyone, back then, too. Some of the murals must take an aw- paint. It happens faster than most people fully long time to create. What’s your would think. Most big murals take me a week Being in the unique position of some-
art.
one who has the ability to impact the way the public world looks, have you managed to think of any ways that conventional public structures could look... cooler? In other words, would a Bruce Greig world look different from the world as we know it? Would bare brick buildings cease to exist? Would we have bridges made of cheese? Well, the first thing I’d like to do in Binghamton would be to paint the rail bridges around Clinton St. They could look so good, and at the moment they’re about the ugliest thing in town. However, they’re a lot of work, and getting Mural at Endicott Boys permission isn’t easy. & Girls Club.
No, I don’t want to paint everything. I think where you paint is important. Public art is a highlight to a city, so you don’t need it everywhere. Quality is more important than quantity. So, I guess you’re not far away with the bridges made of cheese; although, I’m thinking more of either stone, or cover them in art: portraits, cats… who knows? There are a number of other walls around that I would love to paint, and I plan to, but getting permission is often the problem. Mostly, just finding who owns a wall can be more work than the painting, but I do plan to make the city look better, one way or another. Before I left New Zealand, I managed to do about ten murals in my hometown. And, in fact, when I think about it, every town, or city I have lived in, has ended up with my work in very prominent places, so I’m sure it’s just a matter of time . What has been your experience living and working in Binghamton? I love Binghamton, and the whole of upstate New York, which surprises a lot of people, since I come from New Zealand. But the beautiful N.Z. all of you see, is mostly miles from any town, and often only accessible by helicopter. I found I really like the people I’ve met here, and look forward to being in the local art scene. Kady [Perry, founder of Quarter Yellow Studios] is wonderful; she works tirelessly to find work, and is absolutely in love with art on every level. She’s an inspiration to me when I’ve been overwhelmed by starting a new life. I can’t thank her enough. Finally, what are your feelings on brushing your teeth with your finger: annoying, serendipitously sensuous? Never found the finger really worked. I use the cuff.
NORWICH EXPANDS ITS PALETTE 30 Vol. 2 Issue 9
The Artist’s Palette in Norwich. Photo Provided.
Ronnie Vuolo Assistant Editor Art is a way of life for Jill Kraft, proprietor of The Artists’ Palette, and accomplished artist and photographer. Coming from a long line of artists, this work comes naturally to her. “My family is full of watercolorists,” she says. “I began painting eight years ago, doing acrylic landscape. Currently, I use oils and palette knives. As for photography, my father was a professional photographer in Norwich for over 15 years, and I worked with him throughout my child and teenage years. I am selftaught, and actually have a degree in journalism that I use, as I still freelance throughout the area.” Kraft dreamed of opening an art center, and in 2009, she took the first step when she opened a small store in the front of her home in Norwich. It wasn’t long before she moved to a store at the north end of the city. Starting out as a shared space, she eventually took over and expanded the business, remaining at that location until 2012, when the building in which it was located was sold. After an obligatory move to another space, and a short return to housing the center in her home, her dream was finally realized when The Artists’ Palette opened with much fanfare on August 22nd of this year. A true community art center, The Artists’ Palette offers a photography studio, custom framing, a main gallery, a community gallery, a wide assortment of art supplies, and a variety of classes for adults and children. The Main Gallery is available for feature shows. With over 1,000 square feet of space, it is ample enough to house group shows as easily as solo exhibits, and Kraft is actively seeking applicants for the spring/summer 2015 season. Opening receptions are scheduled for the 4th Friday of each month, from 4-8pm, to coincide with Norwich’s Fourth Friday Art Walk. The Gallery will also feature two exhibits for
the Colorscape Chenango Arts Festival, the weekend of September 6th and 7th. The Community Gallery is reserved for Palette members, who pay a monthly fee to exhibit their work. Fees are based on the amount of space desired. In keeping with their support of the local art movement, framer L.E. Mills uses custom moulding made locally in Sherbourne, at Heartland Frames. In addition to framing, Mills is a custom furniture maker whose décor and furniture are featured in the store. Of her other plans, Kraft says, “I will have food, but not for a few weeks- like a coffee house with Wi-Fi. I have a kid’s section, with dress-up clothes, a chalkboard wall, desks, beanbags, and puppets. There will also be teen drop-in nights for painting, and an elder art program, which I teach, catering to people 60 and over. I do ‘Painting with a Twist,’ which is where people come in and learn to paint, [and] drink some wine- and the next one, on Aug 26th, will be at my store.” Also in the works are a monthly open mic, author book-signings, and yoga classes. One of Kraft’s innovations is a class she calls ‘Art of Me.’ “It’s art therapy without the therapy… [it is] open to anyone, but more specifically, for individuals with special needs. I have worked with an autism group, and an adult mental health group. I have several oneon-one developmentally disabled and mental health clientele. This program is more of an expressive art course.” In addition to a variety of visual art forms, music, drama, and writing may be utilized to enable each student to best communicate in his or her own special way. With all The Artists’ Palette has to offer, it is certain to become a hub of the community, with a little something for everyone. From dream to reality, Kraft has most assuredly created the community art center she wanted. The Artists’ Palette is located at 17-19 South Broad Street in Norwich. Hours are Tuesday through Saturday, 10am-4pm, and by appointment. Further information about services and events may be found at norwichartistspalette.com, or by calling (607) 244-1445.
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September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 31
PEG JOHNSON’S NEW CO-OP SHOW
Civil Rights Demonstration in Binghamton, 1965. Photo Provided.
EXAMINES A LONG GONE BING
Rose Silberman-Gorn Staff Writer
With Peg Johnston’s exhibition at the Cooperative Gallery approaching, she found herself wanting to create something that would bring Binghamton’s past, present, and future into focus. This interest was piqued by her experiences serving on the advisory committee for Blueprint Binghamton, and with the Department of Public Works. Adding to that interest was a huge family archive of photos of Binghamton, dating back to the 1940s. “I come from a family that takes a lot of pictures of their hometown,” she says. Her mother’s side of the family has called the Southern Tier their home since the 1830s, when her great-great-grandfather owned a buggy museum in Harpursville. Peg grew up around photography because it was her father’s profession. Following in his footsteps, she used photography as a way to document her surroundings and various things that interested her, including architecture. She decided to take advantage of this goldmine of photographs by looking through them and choosing a selection of around 40 to display in black-and-white, for an exhibit she’s calling Binghamton: A Photographic Memoir. Her goal, she says, was to “show a visual record of Binghamton, and create a narrative of life as I experienced it. I picked photos that resonated with me and told a story.” Peg chose to focus mostly on photos depicting the urban renewal of Binghamton, a time of remarkable change that took place from the late 1960s to the early 1970s. Many historic buildings in downtown Binghamton were demolished in favor of new construction like the Government Plaza and the Broome County Veterans Memorial Arena. This urban renewal resulted in, as Peg describes, a “feeling of devastation,” and created competing versions of Binghamton- the modern 20th century
buildings clashing with the 19th century architecture. Early photographs show downtown Binghamton as it was before the urban renewal- a crowded hub of shopping and activities. Other poignant photographs offer small glimpses into what life in Binghamton used to be like. The image of a meat market window with a chicken hanging, and a large variety of meat, including duck, shows the evolution of how we purchase our food. Peg also focuses on images that are representative of larger issues, ones that maybe haven’t changed all that visibly. One photograph from 1948 shows a black man handing a leaflet to a white man, who is trying to avoid him. She also displays images of protests in Binghamton over the years, a topic that is very relevant considering the numerous grassroots movements happening locally. “Protests say a lot about a community, and it’s not a history that gets told much. Change is interesting to look at.” Both lifelong Binghamton residents and recent transplants can see the changes the city has gone through illuminated in this exhibit. Peg looks forward to hearing people’s recollections and feedback at the opening; additional conversation will take place at a panel discussion on the evolution of Binghamton, on September 18th at the Cooperative Gallery. Engaging herself in photographs of Binghamton’s past has only made Peg more excited about the future of the city. “History focuses the viewer to the future,” she says. “I hope the photos will give people more appreciation of the present of the community and of the forces that shape us.” The opening reception for “Binghamton: A Photographic Memoir,” takes place Thursday, September 4th from 6-8pm at Cooperative Gallery 213, 213 State Street in Binghamton, followed by open hours the following day on First Friday, September 5th, from 3pm-9pm. The show will be on display through September 27th. A closing reception will feature the video “Rust to Roots,” by Kevin Hannagan. Cooperative Gallery is open Fridays from 3-6pm, Saturdays 12-4pm, and by appointment. The third Thursday discussion takes place on September 18th at 7pm.
32 Vol. 2 Issue 9
RICHARD STRONG’S FIRST FRIDAY PHOTO EXHIBIT AT SLS GALLERY UNVEILS A DIARY OF JAPAN 60 YEARS IN THE MAKING (via web) It’s not often many of us get to climb Mount Fujiyama in Japan, much less camp overnight at the top. Even less of us get to take a timelapse color photograph of a blizzard happening on said mountaintop in the middle of the night. But those are just some of the images you might see as part of Richard Strong’s A Return to Japan exhibition, being held this First Friday at the SLS Gallery on Front Street in Binghamton.
In 1955, following an eight month stint in Korea with the army after the war, Strong gladly accepted an assignment to military headquarters in Tokyo. For over a year, during his off duty time, he traveled to many areas of Japan and took pictures of the people and places, with the intent of someday having an exhibition of his time there. Strong’s exhibit takes you to Tokyo and its suburbs, northwest Toyko, the countryside, the seaside, southern Japan, and to Mount Fujiyama. Besides his black & white and color prints, Richard will have on display a walking stick he carried with him to the top of Fujiyama, which was branded with a hot iron at each station of the climb; and some vintage happi coats- garments worn at festivals in Japan printed with beautiful colors, usually representative of a particular firehouse company. Strong’s exhibit includes some photos from a visit to Hiroshima and Nagasaki ten years after the atomic bombs were dropped, pictures of the Imperial Palace (both inside and out), a photograph of the Great Buddha in the city of Kamakura, sumo wrestlers, soba shops, and more. Also included in “A Return to Japan” are pictures of bonsai gardens, a silk mill, pearl divers, fishing villages and pictures taken at the studio of well-known woodblock artist Paul Jacoulet. Richard Strong’s exhibit will take you back in time to a period in Japan unlike you have ever seen. “A Return to Japan” can be seen at the SLS Gallery (190 Front St, Binghamton) this first Friday Sept 5th from 6-9 P.M. It is open to the public. (Clockwise from top right: “On Limits,” “The Boat Arrives,” “The Imperial Palace- Looking Out,” and “The Ritual.” All photos by Richard Strong.)
COLORSCAPE CHENANGO ARTS FESTIVAL
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 33
BRINGS WORLD CLASS CULTURE TO NORWICH
the page are featured at a book-signing event with authors including: Suzanne Bloom, Traci Brower, Stefan Foster, Johneen Loftus, and Peter Troy.
Ronnie Vuolo Assistant Editor
Colorscape is more than an arts festival. It’s a feast for the senses, a smorgasbord for the soul. Juried vendor tents, filled with the creative pursuits of more than 100 handpicked artists, sprout from Norwich’s two parks for two days each September: meandering along grassy avenues and offering for sale fine art, fiber art, jewelry, sculpture, handmade clothing, accessories, furniture, photography, pottery, and quilts. There’s something for everyone, from the whimsical quirkiness of Leigh Hannon’s colorful “skellies” to the precise lines of Michael Smith’s architectural drawings. In addition to the juried tents, attendees will find the work of emerging artists at the student art exhibition, featuring the work of Haley Benson and Kasey Peters (winners of the 2014 Francis K. Wilcox Scholarship for Emerging Young Artists). For those inspired to create their own work of art, the Art Zone offers projects for all ages.
If art and music are not enough, a new event has been added to line-up; the 1st annual 5K Fun Run & Walk is a race with a twist. In navigating the course, participants pass through 5 “color stations” where they are anointed with colored pigments, in keeping with the artistic theme of the festival. As the race is limited to 250 adults and 100 children, online pre-registration is recommended. Pre-registration entry is $20 for adults, $10 for children 12-18, and free for ages 5-12. Race day entry, space permitting, is $25 adults/ $15 children. The race will take place rain or shine. Crowd’s at last year’s Colorscape. Photo Provided.
features musical attractions including a kid’s drum zone, songwriter’s summit, and a variety of dance showcases.
Outstanding in its quality and diversity, Colorscape Chenango Arts Festival (full name) is on par with the type of fest one would expect in a hip urban setting, rather than sleepy (though hip in its own right) Norwich. Sound
takes pride of place next to sight at this festival, as evidenced by the great lineup of live tunes. The music roster on the Main Stage (in East Park) includes L.J. Gates, The BurnsKristy Band, Tumbleweed Highway, Brother Sun, Mustard’s Retreat, The Kennedys, and Spero Plays Nyro. Special highlights include Aztec Two-Step (folk-rock powerhouse with a 40+ year history), The Grand Slambovians (quirky, wildly weird, slightly psychedelic downstaters who will perform both days), and legendary folkie John Gorka. Not to be outdone, the Interactive Stage in West Park
Melissa Mischke Contributing Writer
talent. So many people in the show are from Broome County, and many live right here in Windsor. There’s so much talent in our area.
For seven years, Windsor, NY has been hosting the Window of the Arts Festival, bringing together world class artists, musicians, and crafters for a day of family friendly activities in Klumpp Park. Carousel recently sat down with festival director Sue Rambo to talk about the festival, eagles, and more:
Tell me about this year’s lineup of Artists and Musicians. We have eight new artists this year. Many of the artists do demonstrations, which is a big draw for people, to see how the Art evolves. Some of the artists we provide bleachers for, so people can sit and watch them. Laurel Nugent Burgin, a blacksmith and potter, brings her forge with her and demonstrates right there at the festival. So that’s always neat. This year, BC Celtic Pipes and Drums will lead our puppet parade at 11am .We have the puppets from Binghamton’s First Night. These are 10-12 foot tall puppets, not just little hand puppets. We have a lot of really fun bands this year, including Jamie Willard, JB Stacks, Alpha Brass Band, and Slyfoot Johnnie.
possibly occurred in Windsor? Oh, all kinds of history. Windsor’s an old town… over 250 years old. It’s old, so there’s a lot of history here.
Words in another form take center stage at Park Place, when the 13th Annual Poetry Slam competition kicks off Saturday the 6th, at 2pm, with special performances by event founder Richard Bernstein and NYC group Divine Fabrics Collective. For those not inclined to compete, there is an interactive poetry board on the grounds, where attendees can post their poetic musings. In their written incarnation, words on
With the other 4 senses so well provided for, one must not forget the sense of taste. Food and beverages of all sorts can be found at the Culinary Court, and enjoyed while watching a performance in the park. Colorscape takes place Saturday, September 6th, from 10am-6pm, and Sunday, September 7th, from 11am-5pm, in Norwich. The complete schedule, artists listing, and local accommodations, can be found at colorscape. org. Further information may be obtained by contacting (607) 336-3378. Colorscape is a rain or shine event, and admission is free.
ARTS, CRAFTS, MUSIC, AND EAGLES: WINDOW OF THE ARTS RETURNS TO WINDSOR vvv Let’s start by putting Windsor on the map for our new student readers just coming to town. It’s just eleven miles east of Binghamton, Straight down Rt. 17. I’m glad you asked that because people think it’s so far away. How did Windsor’s Window of the Arts Festival get started? It was started in 2008 by members of the Windsor Partnership, who wanted a high quality art festival in a small town with a pretty setting. And that’s what it’s always been. It’s a juried art festival, and we don’t take any ‘made in Japan’ stuff. It’s a nice way to bring people into Windsor from other counties and other states. People come from as far away as Florida and California and Texas. And it’s also a way to highlight our local
I hear Saucy Hog BBQ will be there- Yes, yes they will. They’re from Windsor... they had a recipe and a dream and they had it patented and bottled it and yes they’ll be there in our food court. McGirk’s, they’re back. They were here last year, and they’re a real crowd pleaser. I know they have two types of pie, which is nice to have a little something sweet. It’s going to smell great, I tell you. The whole food court is going to smell heavenly! The Festival also focuses on Windsor’s history. What sort of history could have
Anything surprising about this year’s fest? Hmm, no big surprises... but, we have Elaine Ruggieri, a professional storyteller and historian, who puts our historical program together for us every year. This year’s presentation is Covered Bridges of the Civil War, at 11am, followed by Women of the Civil War, at 1pm. The other part, Women of the Civil War, looks at women’s roles in wartime and how their roles changed. Elaine also obtained letters home from Civil War soldiers from Windsor. The Hutton family is from Windsor and we all know them, and these are love letters from the men in the War home to their family, to their wives. We also have Gary Hinman, he’s from Windsor- born and raised... He’s been a blacksmith for over forty years, and he has this handmade traveling forge, which is modeled after a British Forge designed in the 1870s. So he’ll be over in the history area hammering away. What else can we look forward to? We have a children’s art component to the festival, which is really nice because this is truly an event for Men, Women and Children. There’s something for everybody- it’s not just an old people’s thing or a kid’s thing. And it’s all free. There’s three different activities the kids can make, at least: all based on eagles.
And this year I commissioned a painting from Robert Merwin, of an eagle overlooking the river valley. He’s from Owego, but if you see the painting and you’re from Windsor, you’ll think it’s from Windsor. And if you’re from Susquehanna, you’ll swear it’s from Susquehanna...
I saw my first bald eagle this year, but I was up in Vermont. Are there many sightings in Windsor? Everyday! We have nests right around here, I know where some of them are. You can see eagles everyday, if not every week… They live right here on the river. Is there any reason to go to Windsor after the festival is over? Yes! We have a very active community. Windsor Whipworks Art Center, is right here on Main Street. The day of the festival, they will close an exhibit there. They show three artists at a time, which is really neat... Another fun thing in Windsor, I have to say, is Village Train and Hobby. Even if you’re not a train buff, it is the neatest little store with a huge layout of trains that stay up all the time and the trains just run constantly. The 7th Annual Widow of the Arts Festival of Art and Music takes place Saturday, Sept. 13th, from 10am-5pm. 33 fine artists and crafters will set up at Klumpp Park in Windsor, in addition to music and other fun activities. Admission is free.
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September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 35
theatre and dance.
TWO CROCKS AND A CRACKPOT: Jim Wicker, Bill Gorman and Bernard Sheredy in “Heroes.” Photo Provided.
unlikely ' heroes'' take the stage at chenango river theatre by Phil Wescott
The Chenango River Theatre has raised the bar for regional stage yet again, with their new production of Heroes. With an all-star cast (each having performed in production companies across the country, as well as film and television), a phenomenal director, and a beautifully organized, yet minimalist stage, this production is a rare gem for the Southern Tier. The Chenango River Theatre is the only non-profit, fully professional theatre in the Binghamton area: this means that the actors and stagehands are of a caliber more frequently found on Broadway or in the movies. It’s a rare opportunity for the average Binghamtonian to be able to drive fifteen minutes out of the city and find such incredible talent, let alone for it to be available so regularly and cheaply. It’s also important to note that when they say “no admission after the start of the show,” they mean it: there is no way to get to your seat without walking in front of the stage, so you will be refused at the door. The two-act play Heroes takes place entirely on the small back terrace of a French veteran’s home in 1959. Three old soldiers: Gustave, Philippe, and Henri (played by Jim Wicker, Bill Gorman, and Bernard Sheredy, respectively) gather each day to reminisce about French girls and the passing of time. From start to finish, the play is a whirlwind of tragedy and comedy. The credulousness of each episode is never strained, although the antics of the trio become more and more desperate as the play moves forward. The moments of hilarity (look for Philippe’s recurring line ‘Take them by the rear, captain!”) and restrained despair are perfectly balanced. Despite the subject matter being restricted to the experience of three old soldiers, the play is appropriate for all ages. The way the plot navigates the existential crisis of living past what one perceives to be their utility in life, is sublime. Each character is forced to grapple with his personal sense of worthlessness and ineptitude. At times, the juvenility of the character’s reactions can be frustrating to watch, but it opens the door to allow the audience to fully experience the emotional confinement of the trio. The actors’ chemistry is electric, and
serves to heighten the moments of sincere tenderness and honesty. Each character has suffered a disability at some point in his life, be it physical, emotional, or mental. Henri is stoic and reserved, the only one of the three who seems to grasp and fully accept the reality of the situation he is in. Sheredy is a delight in this role; he mixes the “old grouch” with the stereotypical benevolent grandpa, to the delight of the audience. Wicker plays the snobbish Gustave perfectly, encompassing both his incapacity to accept the reality of his situation and the reverence with which he holds himself, in an understated yet entirely convincing manner. The standout character; however, is Philippe, a man heading towards senility and aware that he is starting to fade. Gorman’s take on the character is alternately hilarious and heartbreaking; as the play reached its emotional turning point, I found myself holding back a river of tears. An intriguing aspect of the production is its strict adherence to a minimalism. Very few sound effects are used, music is played only between scenes, actors have only 2 clothing changes, and less than twenty props are utilized. This adds tremendously to the effect of the play, as there are no flourishes for the actors to hide behind. Instead, the raw emotion and subtle dialogue are made all the more striking through the lack of artifice. The show was marvelous and the staff, producers, and actors are warm and friendly. For lovers of the arts in the Greater Binghamton region, “Heroes” is an absolute must.
The Chenango River Theatre is located at 991 State Highway 12, just past Black Bear Winery. Tickets range from $20-24, depending on the night (half-price for college students and youth under 18). The show runs from September 4th through the 14th, Thursday- Saturday at 7:30pm, Sundays at 2pm. Refreshments may be purchased for a nominal cost during intermission. Wine and beer are also available (always free, but please remember to tip). More information may be found on their website at chenangorivertheatre.org.
CIDER MILL PLAYHOUSE GOES DEEP INTO THE WOODS 36 Vol. 2 Issue 9
Heather Merlis Assistant Editor Be careful what you wish for- you might just get it, along with some stuff you didn’t ask for.
Such is the plight of the familiar characters of Into the Woods, the 1987 Brothers Grimm-inspired Stephen Sondheim musical (book by James Lapine), which is coming to the Cider Mill Playhouse this month (It’s also coming to movie theaters this Christmas, so if your personal wish is to see Meryl Streep, or Johnny Depp, in another film, you’re in luck). Carousel spoke with Kevin Crewell, director of the Cider Mill production, about how he plans to bring our local thespians into the woods.
vvv How did you get involved with the Cider Mill Playhouse? This my first show at the Cider Mill. I’ve been doing professional theatre for the past fifteen years: I performed in Spamalot on Broadway, and was on the national tours of Jersey Boys and The Drowsy Chaperone. But, for the last five years, I’ve been directing, choreographing, and teaching more, and performing less. I have a friend in Ithaca, where I sang at some benefits, and that’s where I met Gail Belokur, who is the Cider Mill’s Executive and Artistic Director. She said to me, “We are in the process of taking the Cider Mill in a new direction, would you like to be a part of it?” I said yes. We discussed Into the Woods. I liked that the show would be more than just a big production. This show can define where we want the theatre to go in the future. Cider Mill could be an artistic home for actors here, and from New York City, a place for them to create. It’s about building a really strong foundation. Why Into the Woods? I love the characters. For me, these aren’t fairy tale characters; these are real people with real problems, who want real things. They are written so strongly that the audience should be able to relate to every character and be inspired. These characters take big risks, and some of them fail; some succeed, but they all take those risks. It’s a beautiful parallel to what’s going on at the Cider Mill; Into the Woods is a big showit’s a big risk. To use professional actors, along with the local talent pool of really great artiststhe professionals learn from the locals, and the locals learn from the professionals- that’s when something really great can be created.
Tell us about this show, and the work of Stephen Sondheim. To be able to experience a Sondheim show is to be able to experience American musical theatre at its pinnacle. In the contemporary world, he is our Rodgers & Hammerstein; he is our Lerner & Loewe. Stephen Sondheim is, arguably, one of the best contemporary creators we have. He is the best person to record the human experience. He is at the top of his field, because he doesn’t just entertain us- he challenges us. Into the Woods talks about real life emotions, about real life experiences: about a fifteenyear-old growing up; an older couple who can’t have children; a mother sheltering her daughter, because she doesn’t want to let her out into the world. It talks about men who can’t provide for their families, and how that makes them feel; men who take advantage of women; men who run from their problems and then have to face them. The first act is the fairy tale; the second act is when we get what we’ve always dreamed of, and it doesn’t fulfill what we wanted. It’s got some of the best songs in the musical theatre canon, but it addresses real problems. It gives the actors the opportunity to go places they haven’t gone before, and to address things that aren’t always comfortable to talk about.
How do you plan on doing justice to this work of art? We’re going to talk about the truth behind the situation, beyond the fairytale. We’re going to talk about what each character has to do with the actors portraying them. We’re going to go deep, to the emotional lives of these characters, because that’s when the audience gets the opportunity to go deep. We’re not always encouraged to do that. It’s rare that an artist- or anybody- goes for truth, and that’s what we’re doing. If it’s ugly, if it’s funny, as long as it’s the truth we’re going to go for it. We’re going to risk it, and we’re going to ask for our audience to take a risk too, because that’s when change can occur. I want to entertain the hell out of the community. You are going to get on a ride- like a really truthful amusement park- the ups and downs, and twists and turns. It might be really emotional; it might be really joyous.
vvv This really truthful amusement park is located at 2 South Nanticoke Avenue in Endicott. You’ll have your chance to go deep at 7:30pm every Thursday through Sunday, from September 18th through October 12th. For tickets or more information, visit cidermillplayhouse.com, or call the box office at (607) 748-7363.
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 37
PEERING INTO THE DEPTHS OF SOLITUDE:
VIEUX CARRE RETURNS TO THE KNOW
Heather Merlis Assistant Editor
When seeking serious theatre in this area, you are likely to be given a simple instruction: go see a show at KNOW Theatre. With a reputation for taking risks and bringing provocative and challenging pieces to the public, it is fitting that they chose Tennessee Williams’ Vieux Carré, one of the writer’s lesser-known, more autobiographical works, to perform once again this fall. KNOW initially presented Vieux Carré last year, and their production was selected as one of ten plays to be performed at the Provincetown Tennessee Williams Festival, which draws troupes from across the globe. Carousel had the chance to speak with Brooklyn-based actor Tommy Heleringer (of the web series Whatever this is.), a visiting artist at the KNOW Theatre, who is portraying the role of The Writer: vvv What is Vieux Carré? Tennessee Williams was writing this play for over 40 years. It takes place in a rooming house where he actually stayed. Vieux Carré literally means “Old Square,” but it stands for the French Quarter of New Orleans. It’s about his time that he spent there, from the winter of 1938 to the spring of 1939. It’s basically about his becoming an artist: finding his voice as an artist, the choices he had to make as an artist- and some of them were difficult choices, because he had to choose himself over helping other people. It’s about freedom. And one of his favorite themes: loneliness; there’s a great deal of that. It’s about the very disappointed people who live in this house, who are at the end of their line, but are fiercely denying that they are. And they all wind up staying at this house at 722 Toulouse Street. Why do you think KNOW Theatre chose this play? Why would you not do this? Tim
(Gleason, Artistic Director) loves Tennessee Williams- he calls him the American Shakespeare. I honestly had no idea how good this play was until I did it. I mean, I read the play, but I really didn’t understand, because there’s so much going on, but Brandt (Reiter, Director) helped me get to the live wire. There’s nothing quite like the drive to be an artist. It lights the world. What has the rehearsal process been like? There’s an exciting feeling I get when I work on something- a feeling of things going well- an inner, quiet voice saying, “I can do this,” and that’s a blessing. I was drawn to Tennessee Williams, but it wasn’t until I got here and worked with these actors that I realized how great a part and how great a play it is. And how relevant it is to exactly what is going on in my life, right now. When I first read this play, I thought, “This doesn’t work,” but now I see that it does. Why did you think that? Because I didn’t really get it. I didn’t think it came together as a whole, but the deeper you read it, the more it makes sense. And it’s great working with Brandt, because he makes texts active, but he’s really activating what’s already there. What kind of experience will this play be, to the viewer? I don’t know- I think, with any theatre experience, each audience member takes away something different. This play is particularly haunting, and it forecasts what we are all haunted with, which is being alone in the world. I mean, people can help you, but we are all essentially alone. It reminds me of this poem by Hart Crane, which says, “That world that comes to each of us alone.” That has always haunted me. There’s a moment of solidarity in (the play); there’s a moment when Nightingale says to The Writer: “You are alone, and I am too.” It may be a contradiction, but life is a contradiction. Of course, he’s trying to have sex with me, but it’s true.
vvv Vieux Carré will be performed in the round at KNOW Theatre, located at 74 Carroll Street in Binghamton, from September 5th through the 20th, before heading out to Provincetown. Visit knowtheatre.org or call (607) 724-4341 for tickets and more info.
Local Arts Local Music Local Business Local Achievements from the past and present!
WHATSGOINONBINGHAMTON.COM
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 39
The waiters don’t like to talk about it. The chefs don’t like to talk about it. The restaurateurs most certainly don’t like to talk about it. It was a messy, unfortunate incident, and yet the majority of folks have already erased it from their memories. As fleeting is the public consciousness- it is a wonder, all of the everythings that can be so quickly forgotten. And yet, there are some who remember. The veteran dishwashers and fry cooks- when they meet up for late night poker games and the vodka is flowing- they will tell the story. They will hush their voices and close the blinds, but they will tell the story. They will tell the story about the man who ate all of the food and died. All the food. And died. Picture it: Binghamton, New York. March 2010. Downtown is abuzz with the success the first ever Binghamton Restaurant Week. It is the last evening of the ten night event, which brought together seven of the area’s finest eateries (including Lost Dog Café, Little Venice, and Tranquil Bar & Bistro) to showcase their best cuisine in a special $20 prix fixe menu. In turn, each restaurant would donate a portion of their profits to the local Boys & Girls Club. As 5pm rolls around, kitchen and wait staff finish preparations for dinner service, which is bound to be busy. A few blocks away, Lester Hoffman questions the concierge of the hotel he has just checked into, about dinner options. Lester is a systems analyst from Altoona, passing through Binghamton overnight, on his way to oversee the integration of a client’s database in New Hampshire. Lester is 47 years old. Never married. Balding. Slightly overweight. Not discontent though, Lester is a betting man, and he spends much of his free time at his local horse track. The concierge informs Lester of Restaurant Week, and points him in the direction of Lost Dog Café. As it is still early in the dinner service, Lester has no trouble getting a seat. He orders the prix fixe dinner: hummus and chips as an app, followed by the café’s famous Rigatoni, and to finisha flourless chocolate torte. He was not expecting cuisine like this: it is a big step up from the scrapple sandwiches he’s served back home in Altoona. Thrilled by the experience, he asks his waitress more about Restaurant Week. “You missed a lot of really great food,” she says. “Too bad you can’t eat seven dinners tonight.”
food and drink.
Nobody knows what happened to Lester during the next two hours. The concierge of the hotel doesn’t recall seeing him return to his room, though footage from a local pharmacy’s security camera did catch the blurry image of a man, fitting his description, buying Ipecac and ginger ale at 10:37pm. A local homeless man later came forward, claiming he had heard the screams of banshees while walking along the river. And yet. 11:59pm. Lester walks into the bar. He his pale. He is bloated. His shirt is covered in a Pollack-like array of colored sauces. The waitress he met earlier in the evening eyes him from a barstool with a mixture of pity, amusement, and apprehension. Then, at 12:03am, Lester explodes. Explodes! Blast! Bam! Boom! All of him. All over everything. Kaplooey! (The coroner, who later took an extended leave of absence, was able to deduce that the cause of death was the 17lbs of half-digested food that were later scraped from the walls of the bar. He estimated that Lester had consumed roughly 37,000 calories in a four hour period.)
AN UNAUTHORIZED
(AND PROBABLY COMPLETELY UNTRUE)
HISTORY OF BINGHAMTON RESTAURANT WEEK
And so (after a massive cover-up effort led by several multi-national PR firms), it was decided that Restaurant Week would indeed return, as long as a lunch component was added. Two delicious meals a day are not, after all, unreasonable. Furthermore, it was announced that Restaurant Week would happen not once, but twice a year. Twenty lunches. Twenty dinners. One hundred and twenty separate courses. No reason left for anyone to gorge themselves to the point of explosion. If only poor Lester’s database integration gig in New Hampshire had taken place six months later... Well, no. The whole point of this story is that Lester is the reason why Restaurant Week now covers lunch AND dinner, twice a year. Whatever. Plot hole. Moving on.
by Chris Bodnarczuk
“Can’t I?” Lester, never missing an opportunity to gamble, continues: “When do you get off work? I’ll bet you a drink that by the time you’re done, I’ll have eaten seven appetizers, seven entrees, and seven desserts!” The waitress laughs. Seven dinners. Twenty one courses. Impossible. Not one to turn down a free drink, she agrees to meet him at midnight at a local dive. And so, Lester pays his bill and sets out on the Herculean task ahead. It is 6pm. His six destinations are fairly close to one another, and the last stop- Sake Tumi- doesn’t close until 10pm. Four more hours. Six more dinners. Eighteen more courses. Forty minutes for each restaurant, including travel. He practically runs to Mad Moose, quickly scarfing down some juicy, smoky barbeque. 6:37pm. With three minutes to spare, he runs down the street to Kilmer Brasserie & Steakhouse (now Remlik’s), making sure to order his steak rare. 7:34pm. He is late. Onward to the (now defunct) Flan Club. Dinner number four. Easy in. Easy out. 8:19pm. Thankfully, Little Venice is within sight. No matter how delicious the meat logs and pasta are, they’re weighing heavy on his stomach. He takes an antacid and champions onward. 8:49pm. The walk to Tranquil is not a long one, but Lester is moving slower. He knows that the haut French food is delicious, but averts his eyes to every bite. Even if he does win his bet with the waitress, he doubts he’ll be able to stomach a beer by then. 9:27pm. He turns the corner to Sake Tumi, his last challenge. Sushi is light. This is good. But still, it does not change the fact that Lester is eating his seventh dinner of the night. Twenty one courses. 9:59pm. Lester finishes his last bite. (That was some foreshadowing, right there.)
In the days that followed Lester Hoffman’s untimely death-by-explosion, word spread fast. There were inquiries. Every kitchen in town was abuzz… “Restaurant Week killed Lester Hoffman,” some said. “That fat ass killed himself,” others insisted. Regardless, the Restaurant Week organizers spent many a late night trying to figure out how to ensure that such a tragedy would never happen again. They decided that: if Lester had only had more time- more options- he wouldn’t have insisted on the bet in the first place. He would have left Lost Dog that night and gone back to the hotel, content in the knowledge that he could wait until the following day to try Little Venice’s meat logs. If he had only had more time.
Over the past four years, the locals have all but forgotten the story of exploding Lester Hoffman. Those that remember won’t discuss it. Well, except for the veteran dishwashers and line cooks, during their late night poker games where the vodka flows freely. Oh, and the waitress that Lester made the bet with. She remembers. No amount of therapy can erase the memory of a person’s entire body exploding all over you. Fall 2014’s installment of Binghamton Restaurant Week takes place Sept. 16th-25th, with a record-breaking 27 venues participating. It is possible that the newcomers- Social on State, Lupo’s S&S Charpit, The Night Kitchen- don’t even know the story of Lester. So it goes. Whether consciously or not, his influence lives on. Every time a chef weighs out a properly portioned cut of protein, it is because of Lester. Every time you are encouraged to sip a digestif after dinner, it is because of Lester. And every time a systems analyst from Altoona rings a bell, Lester gets his wings.
vvv Binghamton Restaurant Week takes place Sept. 16th-25th, at various restaurants throughout town. The entire roster is, conveniently enough, printed on the back cover of this paper. Three course lunches are $12 or less, and three course dinners top out at $25. This time around, proceeds go to benefit CHOW and OurSpace at Rec Park. For more information, check out binghamtonrestaurantweek.com.
BING LOVES BEER
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 41
WITH TWO BREWPUBS DOWNTOWN, ONE TASTING ROOM EACH IN JOHNSON CITY AND ENDICOTT, AND THREE MORE BREWERIES WITHIN A 40 MINUTE DRIVE, THERE’S NO DENYING THAT THE BEER REVOLUTION IS IN FULL SWING IN THE TRIPLE CITIES. THIS MONTH, THE ANTE IS UPPED, WITH NOT ONE, BUT TWO BEER FESTIVALS TAKING PLACE IN BINGHAMTON! BINGHAMTON BREW FEST September 13th Tickets: $35 (additional $15 for VIP Hoppy Hour) Participating Breweries: To start, Binghamton Brewing Co., Cortland Beer Company, Galaxy Brewing Company, North Brewery, Water Street Brewing Co., and Ithaca Beer Company That’s just the locals, though. With 70 participating breweries (AL George is sponsoring), the list is far too long to print. Big names include Abita, Brooklyn, Dogfish Head, Victory… Just Beer? Definitely not. In addition to the breweries, the fest will be showcasing select NYS wineries, including Black Bear, which is just up the road in Chenango Forks. Plus, live music from The Look, a pop/country outfit based out of Susquehanna. They’re also hosting a separate VIP Hoppy Hour. From the organizers: “Our area has truly embraced craft brewingand the culture that comes with- it in the past few years. Every six months a new brewery, tasting room, or beer- centric restaurant or pub opens its doors to craft beer drinkers. Even our staple watering holes in the community have undergone a transformation and broadening of beer selections; to compliment the novice to expert of microbrew enthusiasts. Binghamton Brew Fest perfectly complements this micro movement, gathering beer makers, enthusiasts, and drinkers under one roof, on a great day, to celebrate our common love... beer!” Find out more: thebinghamtonbrewfest.com, “Binghamton Brew Fest” on facebook
PARLOR CITY BREW FEST September 25th Tickets: $35 (advance sale) Participating Breweries: Binghamton Brewing Co., Cortland Beer Company, Endless Brewing, Galaxy Brewing Company, Ithaca Beer Company, FarmHouse Brewery, North Brewery, Water Street Brewing Co. (possibly more) Just Beer? Nope! Tickets include gourmet food pairings! Plus, there’s the added benefit of knowing that you’re helping to support The Family and Children’s Society, which provides the local community with counselling, senior care, after school programs, mental health care, sexual abuse treatment, and countless other valuable services. From the organizers: “Savor the taste of locally brewed beer and artisan food at the Third Annual Parlor City Brew Fest to benefit The Family and Children’s Society. In addition to showcasing the art and science of eight premiere brew masters, this year’s event will feature the unique beer breads of Chroma Bakery and contemporary cheeses from Engelbert Farms. The event will be held at Terra Cotta, 81 State Street, Binghamton, from 5 to 8pm, Thursday, September 25th. Cost is $35 per person which includes tastings and gourmet food accompaniments. Corporate sponsorships are welcomed with all proceeds benefitting family and children’s services.” Find out more: familycs.org, “Parlor City Brew Fest” on facebook
SEPTEMBER MEANS WINGFEST IN THE TRIPLE CITIES 42 Vol. 2 Issue 9
Of course, de-throning the king will not be easy. Since the Kipp family revived Clinton Street’s famous Old Union Hotel in late 2012, the bar has quickly made a name for itself as THE go to spot for chicken wings in Binghamton. Lightly breaded and perfectly crispy, the wings can be served up in traditional mild-medium-hot fashion, or tossed in any one of several homemade sauces, including Carolina Gold (tangy mustard BBQ), Honey Sriracha (self-explanatory), and Singapore Chile (super hot and Asian inspired). The rest of their menu (and the drink selection) ain’t nothing to shake a stick at either… a selection of culinary refinement in a setting more akin to pickled eggs and peanuts.
Chris Bodnarczuk Editor-in-Chief
Buffalo, New York. 1960-something. A college kid returns home to his family’s bar one night. Unannounced. Drunk. With several of his also unannounced, also drunk friends in tow. “Hey, Ma!” he shouts. “We got chicken in here or what!? Ma?” Ma has chicken in there. Just scraps- but she throws them into a deep fryer then tosses them with hot sauce and butter. The Buffalo wing is born. It is a story all of us know, if “all of us” actually means “all of us who spend late nights watching Food Network specials and cruising Wikipedia.” The Buffalo wing (more broadly, the chicken wing) has, of course, gone on to gain acclaim throughout America, satisfying citizens’ penchant for deep fried things and meat and butter. We in the Triple Cities are no different. We like deep fried things and meat and butter. And we love our wings. Which is why Equinox Broadcasting is presenting, for the third year, Binghamton WingFest.
Photo via web.
The one day event takes place on Saturday, Sept. 27th, at Traditions at the Glen, and will showcase the best area offerings of America’s favorite finger food. Twenty local bars and eateries will be presenting their best wing recipe, and attendees will sample and then vote for their favorite. At the end of the day, the votes are tallied, and one venue will be crowned 2014’s “King of Wings.”
The now defunct Shagunda’s was crowned 2012’s winner, a title taken in 2013 by The Old Union Hotel. They’ll return in 2014, defending their crown against other participants, including the Blind Tiger Pub, Brozzetti’s, Food & Fire, Fountains Tavern, Gallagher’s Irish Pub, Gramma’s Country Café, Nevole’s, Red’s Kettle Inn, Southside Yanni’s, Stu’s Place, the Night Cap, Tonarlo’s, and Topper’s Saloon.
Admission to WingFest includes tickets for ten “taste-testing” wings, and entertainment: several bands will be performing throughout the day, including the Bruce Beadle Band, Outer Reef Woodshed Prophets, and Wreckless Marci. Additionally, there will be a wing eating contest for those brave souls willing to risk their blood sugar levels (and sign a waiver) in exchange for fame, glory, and prizes. The 3rd Annual Binghamton WingFest takes place on Saturday, September 27th, from 1pm to 6pm, at Traditions at the Glen (4101 Watson Blvd, Johnson City). Admission is $15. A portion of the proceeds go to benefit local charities. For more info, check out binghamtondrive.com, or tune into 100.5 FM.
STARTING THE DAY OFF RIGHT AT THE BAGEL FACTORY
of American cheese. “Home fries?” she asks. “Oh, yes,” I reply, “and an iced coffee to go, please!” Their home fries blow the roof off any fried potato you’ve ever fantasized about for breakfast. They’re wedged, golden, and crispy as all hell. The crispy texture and the heat packed into these salty little slivers will have you wishing you had placed two orders.
Ty Whitbeck Creative Consultant
So, this is what it feels like to be up before noon on a weekday. I’m finding myself eating breakfast in the morning hours and not for dinner anymore. Such a ridiculous idea, waiting to eat breakfast until dinner, when you think of the staples of many an American breakfast. “Power foods,” they say. Starch, meat, hot sauce, maybe a little fruit, but most importantly: “the incredible, edible egg.” Now, I’m not an egg-eater. Never have been. It’s a smell/texture thing for me. I just don’t like ‘em, so don’t hassle me about it, man! Hell, I know a meat-eater that doesn’t like bacon! BACON! Nonetheless, not liking eggs makes eating breakfast anywhere other than my kitchen perilous. Until I discovered The Bagel Factory. They’re located at 9 Glenwood Ave. in Binghamton, sharing a plaza with a Euro Foods market. The Bagel Factory has been doing business at this spot for as long as I can remember, and they double as a walk-up ice cream stand in the summertime.
Their iced coffee. Damn. Served in a tall 16oz plastic cup, this chilled blend of Arabica beans and ice makes all things right in the world on a hot summer morning. It’s strong, bold, and has that density other roasters fail to incorporate in their beverages. “It’s the higher end Paul DeLima,” Cheryl tells me. Left with just a breath of space for cream, I’m happy, as they fulfill my wishes. I like to taste my coffee, not the gallon of added cream and pound of sugar you get elsewhere. “The Health Coach’s Nightmare.” Photo by Ty Whitbeck.
I’m tired of being pressed for time at Dunkin’ Donuts and having the entire staff look at me like I’m the idiot when they don’t know how to ring my eggless breakfast sandwich into the computer without spontaneously combusting. This happens every time. Every. Time. I’ve never had this problem at The Bagel Factory. They take my bagel of choice, and gladly get to work on the construction of my morning
meal with a smile on their face. Cheryl calls out the meat of the sandwich to a lady in the back, while she toasts my parmesan bagel and slathers it with jalapeno cream cheese. The sandwich I order isn’t on the menu, but it isn’t impossible to make, and they know how to ring it in, properly. I like to call this sandwich “The Health Coach’s Nightmare.” It’s the aforementioned bagel and cream cheese, topped with sausage, ham, and a slice
Even with the added what-have-yous to my sandwich, my meal was just shy of eight bucks. With excellent service, fast turnaround time and early opening hours (6am), even the most hurried person can still grab a quick bite to eat before first shift. The Bagel Factory is definitely a spot for an early riser. They’re also open for lunch. Not for dinner, though. Check out their website, mybagelfactory.com, for hours and both extensive, variety-filled menus of Boar’s Head meats and cheeses on artisanal breads.
RANSOM STEELE TAVERN Est. 1831
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September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 45
film. FROM THE
TRAILER TRASH VAULT Movie trailers aren’t always effective in giving useful previews of what a film is about. They’re usually a mess of disconnected images and phrases arranged in order to get the heart beating. Our resident cinephile, ILANA LIPOWICZ, deciphers these trailers each month, and here’s what she’s able to deduce. This information is not guaranteed to be accurate, but it will most definitely save you from feeling like you spent two and a half minutes spiraling towards the earth in a burning aircraft and still don’t know what movie to see.
The Identical: Everybody knows Elvis Presley, but not everybody knows that when the King was born, he had a twin brother, who died at birth. If you are familiar with the story, you might often find yourself, on a rainy day or just before you fall asleep, wondering what would have happened had Elvis’s brother survived. You can rest easy now, as Howard Klausner has provided the answer, and it’s really quite obvious: he gets separated from his brother at birth and becomes the greatest Elvis impersonator there ever was! The names are changed- instead of Elvis Presley, it’s Drexel Hemsley- but in the alternate universe in which the boy survived, why shouldn’t the brothers have different names as well? (Sept. 5)
Dolphin Tale 2: I can’t image that the release of the first Dolphin Tale movie stirred up too huge a commotion; it escaped my consciousness altogether, until I landed on it while flipping through the five channels hosted by a hotel TV. Still, it must have brought enough success to warrant a sequel… but, if success is measured in tears, sniffles, and awws, how do you top a movie about a boy who befriends a dolphin (named Winter) with a missing fin and helps it recover, all while finding healing for himself in the process? Well, you can start by killing off Winter’s surrogate mother, leaving the frail and weathered sea mammal in solitude (a threat to its health). Then, you can hike up the aww factor by bringing in a baby dolphin to be Winter’s new companion. If you like Youtube videos about lions hugging humans and puppies being born, you’ll probably like this one. The best characters from its predecessor all reappear, including the doctor (played by Morgan Freeman) and a clutzy pelican (for chuckles). (Sept. 12) No Good Deed: Do you know what I hate about scary movies? I always know that what goes on in the story couldn’t really happen. If you share this woe, rejoice! There’s no magic, no monsters, not even a freaky costume in this movie. That’s right- everything that happens in this flick could happen to you right at home, albeit less theatrically. It’s about a violent sociopath who, after killing his wife and then escaping prison by murdering the prison guard, invades the home of the most innocent victims possible- a young mother and her baby. You don’t know any sociopaths? No matter! He didn’t know her either- he just happened to crash his getaway car near her house. If you find yourself falling asleep too easy after horror films, constantly comforted by the absence of ghosts and demons in the realm of reality, check out this movie about a real thing that really could happen. (Sept. 12)
The Maze Runner: My dark and sinister side loves the string of dystopian novels recently being adapted into films, and it loves even more that they are for and about kids. As in The Hunger Games, this story takes place in a post-apocalyptic world, and as in The Giver, no one remembers anything about life before. Young Thomas arrives at the Glade, a world inhabited by all boys, who have been looking for a way out through a giant maze which closes each night, protecting them from the gruesome creatures that stray there. Then, to the boys’ shock and excitement, a girl arrives. She adds intrigue not only by breaking up the sausage-fest but by remembering Thomas, although she doesn’t know from where. What does this mean? Are the two youngsters destined to procreate, signifying a new beginning for the earth and human race? This movie only covers the first book of a trilogy, so we’ll have to wait to find out. (Sept. 19)
This is Where I Leave You: Nothing screams “this is a quirky, contemporary family film” like a grown man bantering with his mother about her boob job. And who better to play a sexually active retiree than Jane Fonda? You can’t deny that she’s still lookin’ good. Jason Bateman plays Judd, who is down in the dumps after discovering that his wife is cheating on him. One tragedy is put in perspective by another (the death of his father), which prompts him to return home to mom Jane Fonda and his three siblings (played by Tina Fey, Adam Driver of Girls, and Corey Stoll of The Bourne Legacy). The siblings then spend an awkward week together reflecting and cringing at their mother’s sexual openness. Hopefully the all-star cast isn’t a way of overcompensating for a mediocre script. If you throw a bunch of A-listers in a room, something great is bound to happen, right? (Sept. 19)
Tusk: Sometimes the weirdest ideas, well executed, hatch the best results. I’m not sure if that will be the case for Kevin Smith’s new film about a podcaster named Wallace who goes to interview a retired seafarer in his mansion. Retired seafarer wants to turn the young man into a walrus-human hybrid... yeah. Surely, there must be some explanation for the old boatman’s strange disposition? There is! As it turns out, he had his life saved by one of the flubbery creatures during a nautical adventure, and from then on, he became convinced of their superiority over mankind. You might recognize Wallace’s concerned cohost (played by Haley Joel Osment) from The Sixth Sense, back when horror films were about dead people and not, you know, walrus people. (Sept. 19)
Ilana Lipowicz Staff Writer
Here’s a list of movies that came out in September a decade ago, two decades ago, three decades ago, you get the picture. Get ready to feel old...
2004: The Forgotten (September 24) When Julianne Moore’s son went missing, she set out to find him (but that’s a little tough when everyone who ever knew him has forgotten that he existed). She learned that she was part of an experiment to see if a mother’s bond with her child can be broken. It wasn’t the most brilliant premise, but it scared the crap out of me. 1994: The Shawshank Redemption (September 23) Before he was building dolphin prosthetics, Morgan Freeman was friend and fellow inmate of Andy Dufresne, whose ingenious prison jail break unraveled one of the most satisfying ends to a film there ever was. Twenty years later, you can still almost always find it playing on TV. 1984: Amadeus (September 19) Peter Shaffer’s play about the life of Mozart was adapted into a film that did justice to the great composer, winning eight Oscars and maybe prompting people to take a break from the Stones to pick up some classical cassettes. 1974: Amarcord (September 19) Master filmmaker Federico Fellini directed this film about a young boy growing up in Italy under Mussolini, mirroring his own childhood in the Fascist state and poking fun at the dictator, the Catholic Church, and himself. 1954: Rear Window (September 1) In one of Hitchcock’s greatest films, reporter L.B. Jefferies (James Stewart) was confined to his apartment after suffering an injury to his leg while on the job. He at least enjoyed visits from Grace Kelly, but she couldn’t hold his attention long, as he was busy paying attention to the stories unfolding across the yard, through the windows of his unwitting neighbors.
46 Vol. 2 Issue 9
books.
RIVERREAD’S RIVER READS We at Carousel are proud to have partnered with our friends at RiverRead Books (5 Court St. Binghamton) to showcase what’s new in the literary world... what you should be reading when you’re not reading Carousel. Don’t forget to check out their ad on page ten for a discount on your next purchase at Binghamton’s only independent bookstore. Special thanks to CONNIE BARNES for compiling the list!
COLORLESS TSUKURU TAZAKI AND HIS YEARS OF PILGRIMAGE By Haruki Murakami $25.95 (20% discount)
Murakami is a genius at writing with emotions swirling beneath the text. He gets the importance of the notes and the silence of the prose, of the dreamy place that is both recognized and strange. Murakami bends the reader into a zone where it feels like a strange tendency between sleep and wakefulness, between lucid dreams and philosophical nightmares. This is the story of Tsukuru Tazaki, a young man haunted by a great loss; of dreams and nightmares that have unintended consequences for the world around us, and of a journey into the past that is necessary to mend the present. It is a story of love, friendship, and heartbreak for the ages. It feels like you are balancing on the edge of a train platform: you feel the sound of the train and the compression of his words but don’t know if the Murakami train is going to hit you from the left or the right.
STATION ELEVEN
THE PAYING GUESTS
NAKED!
By Emily St. John Mandel $24.95 (20% discount. Sept. 9th)
By Sarah Waters $28.95 (20% discount. Sept. 19th)
By Michael Ian Black $17.99
A bold, eerie novel of our civilization’s collapse, this spellbinding novel tells the story of a Hollywood star, his savior, and a nomadic troupe of actors roaming the scattered outposts of the Great Lakes region. Following a pandemic that wipes out a huge percentage of the human population, this small troupe moves between the settlements of an altered world, performing Shakespeare and music for scattered communities of survivors.
It’s 1922 and London is changing. Sarah Waters’ sixth novel concerns itself with the transitional social world of postwar Britain, and with the new forms of license, mobility, and self-definition to which the smashed civic order was giving rise as the old constraints of class and gender fell away. This was also a period in which a new kind of literary realism was born, in particular a female style, as a result of the loss of men and male authority and values. In a south London villa, life is transformed as an impoverished widow and her daughter are forced to take in lodgers. A modern young couple moves in, shaking the routines of the house in unexpected ways. Their presence will alter the course of lives in the villa. As always, Sarah Waters delivers a passionate, devastating novel.
Naked! It’s fun to say and fun to be, as the team behind 2012’s bestseller I’m Bored proves with this tribute to the (temporarily) clothes-free life. “I’m naked!” shouts the impish narrator fresh from his bath, his private parts concealed only by page edges, his bare feet, and a sheet of paper. Add a cape and cookies and life can’t get much better… until the shivers set in. An awesome book for kids 4-8, and, of course, a fun read for all!
This post-apocalyptic tale tells a story about the relationships that sustain us, the ephemeral nature of fame, and the beauty of the world as we know it.
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 49
bingspot.
In each issue, our friends at BingSpot share with us a selection of their newest and best photos: a look back at the month that was. August sure was a doozy! (Clockwise from top left: Golfing at the Dick’s Open; Emily Jablon taking a break from her downtown mosaic project; Foghat at Spiedie Fest; Zac Brown fans at En-Joie; A new mural goes up at Bikram Yoga; Bing from above)
50 Vol. 2 Issue 9
HOROSCOPES
B.C.
by MASTROIANNI AND HART
Each month, CAROUSEL features a guest horoscope columnist. For September, we welcome local bartender extraordinaire SAGE DOUGHERTY. As far as we know, she knows nothing about astrology. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) One of your most attractive qualities is your friendly nature. This month, strut your stuff, and show off that smile of yours to some strangers. Make a few friends along the way! Just stay away from the creepy ones...
DOGS OF C-KENNEL
by MICK AND MASON MASTROIANNI
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) It’s time for some pampering. Indulge in some serious “me time,” and treat yourself to a day alone doing what it is that you love. If what you love happens to be illegal, be sure to run fast. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21) You’re always the life of the party. You MAKE “Debbie Downers” have fun, never taking no for an answer. Your spirit animal is whiskey. So keep the party alive- go ahead and have another. I recommend Jameson. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Take a chance this month- a big one. Make that big move you’ve been dreaming about for so long. Now is the time; just be sure to fill your gas tank and check your tire pressure first.
THE FANCY RESTAURANT
by HOWARD AND CUVELIER
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) Summer isn’t over, so there’s still time for one last hoorah! Find a local craft fair or food festival. If you’re lucky enough to go to one more music festival, bring glow sticks- lots and LOTS of glow sticks! Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) Put down your phone, tablet, Facebook, and twitter. Go to the library! (Yes, they still exist!) Pick up a book, or a magazine if you must. True, you will have to turn the page yourself, but I promise the batteries won’t die! Pisces (Feb. 19-Mar. 20) Your duality is what’s so awesome about you. Try not to get stuck in one single image of yourself. Next time you are craving a juicy cheeseburger, try the quinoa and tofu salad instead! Then go grab a burger when you realize that you hate tofu.
WIZARD OF ID
by PARKER, MASTROIANNI, AND HART
Aries (Mar. 21-Apr. 19) Life is too short to sweat the small stuff. Holding grudges will only harm you. This month, focus on letting things go and staying positive. Easier said than done, but worth it. Only freak-out on people who totally ask for it. Taurus (Apr. 20-May 20) Your stories and jokes always make people laugh. Put your skills to good use, and brighten someone’s day. Charm the pants off them. And if you find them attractive, do it, literally. Gemini (May 21-Jun. 21) Doing something fun isn’t always what’s best. Take time to think about consequences. For instance, I love sushi, but I shouldn’t have eaten the tuna roll that was in my friend’s trunk all afternoon. Food poisoning blows. Cancer (Jun. 22-Jul. 22) The best things in life are worth fighting for- you know it’s true. Stick with it, because no matter how long the tunnel may be, there is always a light at the end. And now- queue Celine Dion! Leo (Jul. 23-Aug. 22) Double-check things this month. When you rely on drunken memories, important details fall through the cracks. It would suck to show up to the wrong bridal shower just because you didn’t double-check the invitation. Not that I would know anything about that…
THE CONTINUING ADVENTURES
OF TRYING TO PROPERLY LAY : OUT THIS FREAKING PAGE WE FINALLY GOT A FOURTH COMIC! (ALSO, WE CAN MAKE THIS THING WITH THREE COLUMNS! WHO KNEW?)
September 2014 Triple Cities Carousel 51
“We Have A Certain Chemistry”
by Paul O’Heron
fun stuff (mostly). ASK A RAGING FEMINIST AMOREENA WADE is a New York State Certified Rape Crisis Counselor who provides advocacy to victims of gender based violence and free education to anyone who will listen. She is currently studying Women, Gender & Sexuality Studies at Binghamton University. Notably, her mother calls NYC Pride the “Dyke Parade” and goes every year. Dear Raging Feminist, My daughter is starting college this fall and even though I know she’s too young to drink, kids will be kids, and I’m worried about one of those date rape drugs at fraternity parties. I’ve always tried to raise her to have common sense, but these boys are cunning, and sometimes there’s just no stopping them. I heard about different test strips that are available for girls to test their drinks. Is there a brand you’d recommend? Sincerely, Concerned Mama Bear
(HINT: Any clue followed by (??, ##) gives the chemical abbreviation and atomic number for the answer) Across Down 1. Important documents like the Declaration of Independence are stored in sealed, _____-filled glass cases to prevent decay. (Ar, 18) 4. Its non-magnetic properties make _____ tools ideal for fine tuning radio and radar systems. (Be, 4) 9. Almost never found as a pure free element naturally, _____ makes up slightly more than 27% of the Earth’s crust. (Si, 14) 10. Marine mammal related to a porpoise. 11. _____ glows reddish orange in commercial signage. (Ne, 10) 13. _____ has the highest atomic number and highest atomic mass of all the elements discovered so far. It is very unstable, due to its high mass, and since 2005, only three or possibly four atoms of the isotope have been detected. (Uuo, 118) 15. _____ has many functions in the body, but mostly it is used to provide support for the skeleton. (Ca, 20) 16. In 1987, a high-temperature super-conductor was made from _____, along with barium and copper. (Y, 39) 19. Casts under one’s spell. 20. _____ is used in its oxide form in gas tungsten arc welding. (Th, 90) 22. What you really need to do to make sure you don’t run out of pizza!! 26. _____, which creates blood’s deep red color, plays a vital role in oxygen transport throughout the body. (Fe, 26) 28. _____ is particularly useful in gas lasers due to its high light emitting in plasma. (Kr, 36) 29. _____ metal is employed when high corrosion resistance at high temperatures is needed, as in high-performance spark plugs. (Ir, 77) 31. Today, _____ is used as a component of nickel-metal hydride batteries, whose most important commercial use is in hybrid cars. (La, 57) 32. _____ is used in a number of well-known cleaning agents in compound form. Another compound is lethal to insects but not harmful to mammals, and is therefore used in pesticides. (B, 5)
1. _____ has been used as a component of World War I-era chemical weapons and in Agent Blue, a Vietnam Era herbicide. (As, 33) 2. Silica _____ is used as a desiccant. 3. Chemical symbol for Sodium Chloride, also known as table salt. 4. Golden Earring, Led Zeppelin, Iron Butterfly, Nickel Creek, e.g. 5. This gas, when found in basements or other enclosed areas, creates a health hazard. (Rn, 86) 6. The reaction of potassium with water gives a _____ colored flame. 7. O-Ren _____, an assassin from the movie Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003) played by Lucy Liu. 8. The _____ number of oxygen atoms that can exist independently is two, so the molecule for oxygen is represented by the using the symbol ‘O2’. 12. “A well _____ machine.” 14. In mid-1982, the composition of the U.S. cent was changed to 97.5 percent _____ and 2.5 percent copper. (Zn, 30) 16. _____ metal increases its electrical resistivity when subjected to high stresses. This property is used in stress gauges to monitor ground deformations from earthquakes and explosions. (Yb, 70) 17. The _____ ounce (oz t) is a unit of imperial measure most commonly used to gauge the mass of precious metals. 18. As sleet falls on frozen roads, the roads get _____. 19. What Beetle Bailey’s sergeant uses to swim in the ocean. 21. “Freedom is a light for which _____ _____ have died in darkness.” – phrase on the side of Tomb of the Unknown Revolutionary War Soldier. 23. “A _____ _____ the Life”, Beatles song whose 40 second long E chord ends Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band. 24. To involuntary spasm from ineffectual vomiting. 25. The first solid-state laser and the first excimer laser relied on _____. (Xe, 54) 27. “People don’t have any mercy. They tear you _____ from _____, in the name of love.” -- James Baldwin, Another Country 30. Suffix that means “more”. (See 18-down.)
Dear Mama Bear, God help you if you ever meet a real mother bear and try to rape her cub. You obviously have no idea that mama bears aren’t giant, enabling, feeble, tender nutsacks. Kids will be kids? Common sense? Just no stopping them? You don’t sound like a mama bear to me: you sound like the rapists’ biggest ally. Completely ignoring the fact that alcohol is the number one “date” rape drug, here’s my problem with rape prevention measures designed for potential victims: We’re sending the message ‘if you don’t use common sense and do x, y, and z, you’re technically at fault for getting raped.’ ‘But Raging Feminist,’ you say with that smug look on your face, ‘if someone’s car gets broken into because they left a $100 bill on the dash, we’d blame them, too!’ No. You wouldn’t. You think you would, but you’d feel bad for them. If they said, ‘hey, our mutual friend broke into my car last night after the party and stole my $100 bill,’ you wouldn’t say, ‘are you sure you didn’t mean to give him that $100 bill? I saw you chatting with him in the parking lot; you obviously just regret it now. Why wouldn’t you cover the $100 bill with more clothing if you didn’t want him to take it? Don’t tell anyone. He could get in trouble.’ Do you know why the vast majority of people go to parties and get intoxicated? Because it’s fun. Do you know why the vast majority of people don’t rape other people? Because common sense tells them not to. That’s where common sense comes into play. We need to stop teaching victims how to stop rape. Rape victims don’t rape people, guns rape people… or something. In the words of world renowned psychologist and author, Mary Pipher, “young men need to be socialized in such a way that rape is as unthinkable to them as cannibalism.” Seriously, mama bear, would you send your daughter to college with a testing kit to check for cannibals? Fuck no. Cannibalism is wicked bad. Let’s all try to agree rape is wicked bad, too. Very Truly Yours, Raging Feminist If there is a situation in your life that you’d like examined from a feminist perspective, email it to triplecitiescarousel@gmail.com c/o “Raging Feminist.”
bite into it 9/16-9/25