TRANS VIEW
Trials For The Holidays
Anxieties about coming home are heightened for transgender people during the holiday season — but so are the benefits in having a supportive community. By Daniel Tirabassi The holidays are when people enjoy social gatherings with friends, family and acquaintances. Many feel this time is joyful and enjoyable. Though it is supposed to be a time of acceptance, many transgender people struggle immensely during this time. There are several reasons this season is problematic for transgender people. The most prominent and understood problems are issues when it comes to family. If a person has recently come out to close members of their family, they’re not always sure how to present to the extended members that they may be seeing for the first time in their newly announced identity. Many are afraid of the reactions they will get from the people that they admire and care for the most. 14 | DECEMBER 2018
To add to the discomfort of the situation, worries about the gifts they will receive from these people also weigh on their minds, especially the minds of younger people. Grandparents are infamous for giving gifts based on the gender of a grandchild. If a grandparent is unaware of a person’s new identity, or if they don’t accept their new identity, the gifts that are given to a transgender child could add to the dysphoria that they are already experiencing. This could also make a family gathering uncomfortable, not only for the transgender person, but for the members of the family that know and/or accept the newly announced gender identity. There are also people that come home during this part of the year after a prolonged absence, like going away for school or moving to a new place. Often, transgender people use the
distance from their family to live full time, or at least most of the time, in their true gender. When going home for the holidays, these people are left with a choice. The choice is to mask their new identity from the family while they are home or use this opportunity to announce this major change to them. Either one of these options can cause immense stress on the person. When a person masks their true identity from their family, they spend the entire trip hiding a major part of their life from people they care about. The person is generally forced to withhold stories and information that they want to share, because it would lead to questions about their gender identity. To top it off, they have to deal with being referred to by a name that they may not have used for a long time. This act alone could cause TRUE Q MAGAZINE
