The Collegian: 2
Sports
23 September 2019
Tulsa snags close win over Wyoming Football journalist Hannah Robbins discusses the Golden Hurricane’s nail-biting 24-21 win against Wyoming in the last minute of play at home on Saturday. Saturday’s game started with threats of mist and spitting rain all morning, but the outcome could not have been more different from the weather. The Golden Hurricane took fans through a bit of a roller coaster, but in the end, the team eked out a win from the Wyoming Cowboys, snapping the latter’s seven game winning streak. Tulsa had a slow start, barely making it to the Cowboy’s side of the field before punting it. The Cowboys seemed to have had some coffee before the game, with quarterback Sean Chambers’s 33-yard run bringing Wyoming on the board. The rest of the first quarter passed slowly, with Zach Smith’s sack ending Tulsa’s drive to respond in kind, and both teams spent the rest of the quarter trading punts back and forth. Tulsa began the second quarter with a promising drive, but Shamari Brooks could only get the ball to within field goal range before Smith’s passes stopped connecting. Jacob Rainey’s attempted 36-yard field goal went wide, and Tulsa had failed again to get on the board. On their next drive, Wyoming tried for a field goal of their own, which was blocked by Reggie Brooks II and Allie Green IV. This seemed to motivate the Golden Hurricane’s next drive, but another sack of Smith led to the end of the drive. Wyoming failed to capitalize on the sack, and then Tulsa regained possession. After failing to connect on two downs, Smith threw a 56-yard pass to Keylon Stokes, putting Tulsa on the board to tie Wyoming. Wyoming seemed to be thrown by this course of events, failing to even get a first down before returning the ball to Tulsa. When Tulsa got the ball with slightly over two minutes left in the half, they were energized. The drive started off strong with Smith’s 18-yard pass to Brooks, and was followed shortly by a 37-yard pass to Sam Crawford Jr. that ended with a touchdown, bringing the Golden Hurricane up by seven as the half ended.
After halftime, Wyoming began to flail; they received two penalties in their first drive that failed to make it to Tulsa’s half of the field after several incomplete passes by Chambers. Tulsa seemed to be on their game on their next drive. Smith’s passes connected when it counted, and the Golden Hurricane made it within touchdown distance, but a delay of game penalty and several missed passes led to Tulsa taking a field goal instead. The rest of the quarter passed slowly, with both teams failing to put together a drive. Wyoming managed to start something in the fourth quarter, capitalizing on holding calls on Tulsa to start moving down the field. Chamber’s 53-yard touchdown pass brought Wyoming within spitting distance of the lead. Tulsa failed to capitalize on their next drive, and gave Wyoming the ball at the 50 yard line. After two successful passes, Chambers ran the ball 15 yards for the touchdown to bring the Cowboys four points ahead of the Golden Hurricane. With a mere five minutes left in the game, Tulsa had to capitalize on their next drive. With the drive seemingly dead at the 50 yard line on their fourth down, Smith connected with Keenan Johnson for a 17-yard run. A face mask penalty by Wyoming put Tulsa at the 19 yard line with three minutes to go, and Brooks ran the ball in to put Tulsa up by three. Wyoming had three minutes to put together a single drive to beat Tulsa, and at first, it looked like they could. Chambers managed to connect to Rome Weber on a crucial fourth down which put Wyoming in field goal range, but at the goal line, it fell apart. After two failed attempts at a touchdown, Chambers ran for the touchdown but fumbled the ball at the three yard line where Robinson II gained possession. With 50 seconds left, Tulsa was able to kneel their way to victory, ending the game with the ball on Tulsa’s one yard line to end 24-21.
Sam Crawford Jr. sprints downfield.
Student Health& Wellness Fair Oct. 7
11 a.m. to 2 p.m.
Student Union Great Hall Drop by to learn about the health and wellness resources available to students across campus. Be confident to care for yourself and others. Get your flu vaccinations, health-fitness assessments and more on site!
photos by James Taylor Shamari Brooks is tackled into the endzone for a TD (top). Cullen Wick tackles a Wyoming ball-carrier (bottom).
utulsa.edu/studenthealthfair
23 September 2019
Sports
The Collegian: 3
Women’s soccer clenches narrow win against OBU
TU sports journalist Santi Serrano brings the action from last Tuesday’s soccer game that Tulsa took 3-2. Last Tuesday at the Hurricane stadium, the Tulsa Golden Hurricane played Oklahoma Baptist University as they prepared for their upcoming conference. Right out of the gate, the game started out explosively with TU taking starting possession and then proceeding to score a goal before a single minute had passed. The 44:13 was kicked in by senior forward Anna Williams (number 17), and at first seemed to have set the tone for the match.
the 26:53 goal by Freshman Aubrey Lechlider (number 26) and was met with a roar from the crowd and the bench. This celebration was premature as OBU’s Tori Kitchel responded to the cheers with another goal of her own at 22:48. With only 20 minutes left on the clock, and the score tied 2-2 once again, both teams were desperate to close out the game. Yet it was TU’s own Liliana Fernandez who scored the final goal of the match at 11:26 setting the final score 3-2.
“With only 20 minutes left on the clock, and the score tied 2-2 once again, both teams were desperate to close out the game.” But as time went on in the first half, TU seemed to struggle to mount any effective pressure on OBU, while OBU managed to get deeper and deeper into TU’s defenses. This rush to tie up the game, though paused by a 16:10 yellow card issued against OBU, resulted in the tying 11:23 goal by OBU sophomore Tori Kitchel. With only ten minutes to halftime, TU seemed determined to get another goal — just as OBU was equally determined to run out the clock and keep the score tied. Ultimately, it was OBU’s stalling that beat out the Hurricane’s aggression and the second half started 1-1. The last 45 minutes of the game was even more intense then the first, with both teams playing considerable harder than the relatively lax first half. The tie was broken by
This goal was unique as Fernandez was playing midfield this game contrary to her usual defender position, a decision that paid off big. As the rest of the game played out, both teams were extremely vocal about their plans; OBU’s bench yelled instructions to their players, and TU could be heard yelling such things as “We already won,” and “We don’t need to score.” The Golden Hurricane took this advice to heart and managed to hold onto the position of the ball for the majority of the last ten minutes to run down the clock. This TU victory was hard fought by an excellent team that I personally am excited to see more of. The Golden Hurricane goes off to play both Kansas City and Chicago State this weekend.
A women’s soccer player fights for possession of the ball.
photos by Santi Serrano
The team huddles up.
Tulsa sweeps team titles at Rhodes College Tulsa Hurricane covers cross country emerging victorious in both men’s and women’s races from the invitational on Saturday. The University of Tulsa men’s and women’s cross country teams won their respective 8K and 6K races on Saturday morning at the Rhodes College Invitational. The race was run at Shelby Farms, which will host the American Athletic Conference Championship on Nov. 1. Both teams cruised to the team title as the Golden Hurricane men finished with a score of 20 points to finish ahead of secondplace Memphis’ 63 points. Meanwhile, the TU women put together a score of 21 points to top second-place Cincinnati’s total of 67 points. Caitlin Klopfer claimed the top individual time in the women’s race as Tulsa placed six runners in the top 10, including four of the top five. The individual victory is the first of Klopfer’s career and the first for a TU women’s runner since Reagan Hausmann won last year’s Missouri Southern Stampede. Klopfer crossed the finish line with a time of 21:26.3, just ahead of Caroline Miller at 21:26.4 in second place. Jenny O’Bryan (21:35.5) and Ashley Barnes (21:37.3) finished fourth and fifth, respectively, while Alice Newcombe (21:45.1) and Katharina Pesendorfer (21:48.7) rounded out the top 10 in ninth and 10th place. Hausmann clocked in at 21:53.6 for 12th place and Adrena Mazzei finished in 14th place with a time of 21:54.7. Alyssa Solberg (22:26.2) rounded out the Hurricane lineup in 26th place. The Golden Hurricane men’s squad, which came into the competition ranked No. 30 in the latest USTFCCCA National Coaches’ Poll, also placed six of the top 10 runners at the meet, including five of the top six marks en route to the title.
Scott Beattie made his season debut with a second-place finish and an 8K time of 24:21.5. He was followed by freshman Patrick Dever (24:21.7), Peter Lynch (24:25.5), Isaac Akers (24:25.8) and Cameron Field (24:35.7), who finished 3rd-6th to comprise the team score. Adam Breaux (24:53.9) and Reed Sahadevan (24:53.9) finished 10th and 11th, respectively, while Jackson Schwartz (14th/25:08.4) and Jerik Embleton (20th/25:26.9) also logged top-20 finishes. Tyler McGinnis (28th/25:44.8), Greg Fehribach (44th/26:14.9), Henry Williams (70th/26:54.1) and Michael Gates (80th/27:15.6) rounded out the TU lineup. Both squads will return to action on Oct. 5 at the Chili Pepper Festival in Fayetteville, Ark.
MEN’S INDIVIDUAL 8K RESULTS 2. Scott Beattie — 24:21.5 3. Patrick Dever — 24:21.7 4. Peter Lynch — 24:25.5 5. Isaac Akers — 24:25.8 6. Cameron Field — 24:35.7 10. Adam Breaux — 24:46.2 11. Reed Sahadevan — 24:53.9 14. Jackson Schwartz — 25:08.4 20. Jerik Embleton — 25:26.9 27. Tyler McGinnis — 25:44.8 44. Greg Fehribach — 26:14.9 70. Henry Williams — 26:54.1 80. Michael Gates — 27:15.6
MEN’S TEAM RESULTS Tulsa, Memphis, Arkansas State, Emory, Cincinnati, Oglethorpe, Rhodes College, Mississippi College, Centre, Union (Tenn.), Christian Brothers, Arkansas-Pine Bluff, Berry, Kentucky Wesleyan, Ozarks (Ark.), Blue Mountain College, East Texas Baptist, Millsaps, Concordia (Texas), Arkansas-Monticello, Mississippi University for Women.
WOMEN’S INDIVIDUAL 6K RESULTS 1. Caitlin Klopfer — 21:26.3 2. Caroline Miller — 21:26.4 4. Jenny O’Bryan — 21:35.5 5. Ashley Barnes — 21:37.3 9. Alice Newcombe — 21:45.1 10. Katharina Pesendorfer — 21:48.7 12. Reagan Hausmann — 21:53.6 14. Adrena Mazzei — 21:54.7 26. Alyssa Solberg — 22:26.2 WOMEN’S TEAM RESULTS Tulsa, Cincinnati, Memphis, Arkansas State, Centre, Emory, Union (Tenn.), Mississippi College, Rhodes College, Kentucky Wesleyan, Berry, Christian Brothers, Southeastern Oklahoma, Millsaps, Concordia (Texas), Arkansas-Pine Bluff, Hendrix, East Texas Baptist, Ozarks (Ark.), Arkansas-Monticello, Mississippi University for Women.
Cailtin Klopfer (left) and Caroline Miller (right) head toward the finish line.
courtesy Tulsa Hurricane
Sports
The Collegian: 4
23 September 2019
Men’s soccer scores 4-0 win against Cardinals
TU sports journalist Gianni Anfuso covers Tulsa’s sweeping victory against the visiting team last Friday. The Golden Hurricane dominated the University of the Incarnate Word Cardinals under the lights on Friday night in a 4-0 homefield victory. The match started off slow with a scoreless and heavily defensive first half. Tulsa started the match in a 4-3-3 formation but couldn’t quite penetrate the Cardinals’ defense.
On the defensive side of the pitch, the Hurricane stood their ground. Tulsa’s gritty defense only allowed four total shots on goal, which were all easy saves for keeper Brady Moody. After the match, Moody’s efforts were celebrated by his teammates and the spirited crowd.
“... once Tulsa changed its formation to a 4-4-2, its offensive fire couldn’t be extinguished.” However, once Tulsa changed its formation to a 4-4-2, its offensive fire couldn’t be extinguished. #17 Adam Habib started the scoring spree in 69th minute of the match by shooting a bullet past Cardinal’s keeper Andres Arce. Habib was assisted by Marcos Moreno off a cross pass from 25 yards away. Moreno went on to assist another goal in the 73rd minute to teammate Harris Partain. Partain later landed a shot at the right side of the field in the left side of the net from an astounding 18-yards out, much to the roaring crowd’s approval. Two minutes later, #29 Austin Schweinert picked the lower right corner of the goal and put the Golden Hurricane up 3-0 to solidify their victory. Schweinert was assisted with a cross from #24 Mitchell Cashion. The Golden Hurricanes continued to play with controlled aggression against the Cardinals, however in the 88th minute Matteo Drougard decided that they would not be content with a 3-goal lead. Drougard shot from 12 yards straight up the middle and buried the 4th goal of the game deep behind Arce. Drougard received his assist with a beautiful touch pass from #8 Charles Noyelle.
In a post-match interview, starting striker Harris Partain spoke about his team’s performance: “We created a lot of chances in the second half … once we got the first one the game opened up even more for our attackers. My goal came from a nice tackle on the sideline which allowed me to keep the ball in play and with Marcos running on to it I was able to drift back inside to receive the layoff pass … once I created the space for myself, I was able to slap one in at the far post” Marcos Moreno spoke on behalf of his team by stating,“It was a great team effort and win. I am happy to be able to contribute to my team with the assists to get the win. Hopefully I can keep providing for the team the next games as well.” The boys are heading into next week very confident and motivated. Their comradery was felt from the sidelines and their team chemistry is quite powerful. The game ended in true Tulsa soccer fashion with a barrage of hugs and high fives. Tulsa now sits with a season record of 2-3-0 and the boys are hoping to hit .500 this Tuesday when they face Creighton on the road in Omaha, Nebraska. Marcus Moreno lines up a kick.
photos by Gianni Anfuso
Keylone Stokes gets tackled for a safety.
Tulsa volleyball ends non-conference slate with loss to northern Kentucky at WKU Volleyball Invitational Tulsa Hurricane illustrates Golden Hurricane volleyball’s 0-3 loss to Kentucky last weekend in the Reynolds Center. The Tulsa volleyball team concluded its non-conference schedule on Saturday with a 3-0 loss [19-25, 21-25, 22-25] to Northern Kentucky on day two of the WKU Volleyball Invitational. The twoday invite was hosted by Western Kentucky at the E.A. Diddle Arena. The Golden Hurricane fall to 7-6 overall, while the Norse improve to 7-5. Junior middle blocker Maggie Hembree received AllTournament team recognition for her performance over the threegame slate. The junior middle blocker capped off the weekend with 26 kills and just three errors on 46 swings (.565). She also totaled 4.5 blocks. The two teams combined for 19 ties and six lead changes. Of the 19 ties, 16 occurred over the first two sets. Following a 10-10 tie, the Norse used a 7-2 run to create a fivepoint gap at 17-12. Hembree had a strong offensive performance in the opening set, as she connected on five of six attacks (.833). The Golden Hurricane quickly fell behind in the second set, as Northern Kentucky used fivestraight points for an 8-3 advantage. Following a TU timeout, the
Golden Hurricane outscored the Norse, 8-2, to force a tie at 11. The two teams were knotted up five more times before NKU scored four straight points for a 20-16 advantage. In the third set, a 6-0 NKU run quickly put Tulsa in 9-3 deficit. The Golden Hurricane would shortly react with five unanswered points, cutting the NKU lead to 12-11. But the Norse didn’t budge, as 6-1 run brought the deficit back to six points at 18-13. TU came within two points three times over the final points of the match. Tulsa hit a .183 attacking clip on 40 kills, 19 errors, and 115 total attacks. Northern Kentucky ended with a .202 attacking percentage, totaling 41 kills and 16 errors on 124 total swings. The Norse edged the Golden Hurricane in assists, 39-37 and held a 10-2 advantage in service aces. The Golden Hurricane recorded 58 digs to 49 for the Norse and led 9-8 in blocks. Hembree paced Tulsa with 11 kills. She committed just two errors on 21 swings. She also blocked one shot and tallied two block assists. Mariah Pardo came off the bench to lead Tulsa with
16 assists, and Roosa Rautio finished with 11. Taylor Horsfall led all players in digs with 21. Callie Cook had four block assists. The Golden Hurricane host Wichita State in their American Athletic Conference opener on
Friday, Sept. 27 at 7:00 p.m. at the Donald W. Reynolds Center. Tickets for all home volleyball matches this year are $5.00 for general admission seating. A group price of $3.00 per ticket for a minimum of 15 persons is available by
Maggie Hembree sends the ball hurdling onto Kentucky’s side.
calling 918.631.GoTU (4688). To keep up with Tulsa volleyball this season, visit TulsaHurricane.com and follow the team on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram.
courtesy Tulsa Hurricane
23 September 2019
Sports
The Collegian: 5
Where does the visiting band sit?
TU marching band member Hannah Robbins explains where the visiting band sits during a sporting event and why that is. The University of Texas made headlines this month when they put Louisiana State University’s marching band somewhere most fans won’t even purchase tickets in: the nosebleed section. This gave LSU’s band a view worse than most fans and suppressed the Louisiana State University Tiger Marching Band’s sound so that it could barely be heard on the field, while the Texas Longhorn Marching Band sat right behind the end zone.
nowhere near the center of the game; their sound could still be heard, but not as well as the home band. This was most common when the home band sat somewhere like the end zone. Bands that followed this strategy include the Air Force and Rice University. The second strategy I saw was putting bands in higher levels of the stadium. This happened not as frequently, but the schools that did it tended to be bigger names, like OSU, UT and ECU.
“... when we were at the University of Arkansas, we were within spitting distance of the field ...” Not exactly fair, right? I decided to take a look at where away team marching bands sit at different games, pulling from my experience in the Sound of the Golden Hurricane Marching Band to see if this is normally the case, or if the University of Texas really wanted to prevent its away team marching bands from being heard. First off, let’s talk about my experiences with the Sound. In the last four seasons with the Sound, we have been to two away games, OSU and University of Arkansas. With OSU, we were on the second story of the stadium in the corner closest to the exit, right behind where the few Tulsa fans in attendance were sitting. It took about five minutes to get down to the field to march our halftime show. On the other hand, when we were at the University of Arkansas, we were within spitting distance of the field and right across the way from the Razorback Marching Band. At our own Chapman Stadium, away marching bands sit a section above where the Sound sat in previous years, aka as far up as we could put them on the visitor side. Then I turned to other stadiums and other conferences. As I looked for information on different stadium’s placements of away bands, I found several patterns. The first strategy with away band placement was simple: put the band in the corner. These bands were still in the front, but
This obviously suppressed the visiting bands’ sound levels, but also could prevent television crews from micing the away band or hearing them in the background of ESPN/ ESPN2 games, which is another interesting strategy. Why the difference? The home team’s confidence, courtesy for the other team’s band and of course money plays a role in the band’s location. First off, some of the schools that moved the away band further back were schools that have notoriously strong fan culture. This means that these universities usually have very loud bands that are pretty well known. However, it also speaks to the courtesy between different bands; as a marching band member, I know what it’s like at other universities, and you always respect the work they put on the field. Seating a band closer to the front can be a way to show that. Honestly though, I think it comes down to money. Every band seat is a ticket that the stadium doesn’t sell, and some of the places bands sit can be in demand for tickets. Since they can sell those tickets at a higher rate right near the field (Arkansas) than nosebleeds (Texas), maybe it’s all about making a quick buck. Maybe the universities seating the away bands closer aren’t worried about selling tickets. Usually the placement of the visiting band aligns with unpopular seats.
graphic by Emma Palmer
Antonio Brown accused of sexual assault NFL journalist Lindsey Prather gives an update on the mounting allegations against the infamously problematic wide reciever. Throughout the past several months, former Pittsburgh Steeler Antonio Brown has been mired in controversy. Following his trade to the Oakland Raiders, multiple off-the-field issues arose ranging from frostbite from a cryotherapy mishap to his refusal to play because his favorite helmet was no longer available. Eventually, these events culminated in his release from the Raiders, with the last stray being an altercation at practice in which Brown called the club owner a “cracker.” The organization effectively cut his salary, leading to his release and subsequent signing for the New England Patriots. These incidents have been just the most recent in a long string of events involving Brown that depict a pattern of his questionable behavior. Now, these incidents pale in comparison to the lawsuit that has been filed against him.
him to buy the piece for $700, nearly doubling the next highest bid. Following the auction, an impressed Brown hired her to paint a mural in his Pittsburgh home, offering her $1,000 a day for her work. She accepted;this facilitated a chain of events that are described in the lawsuit. According to the artist, at first Brown and his various assistants were exceptionally friendly and exhibited great interest in her work. He posted her progress on his social media during the first day.However, this did not last. The first instance of inappropriate behavior took place on the second day. The suit alleges that at some point during the second day of the mural’s painting, Brown approached her from behind while she was in a kneeling position. When she turned around, she was greeted by the sight
“Brown allegedly contacted the victim after the crime and taunted her through text ...” Two women have levelled allegations against Antonio Brown, one of which is a civil lawsuit accusing Brown of rape and sexual assault. The lawsuit specifically describes assaults on three separate occasions: twice in June 2017 and once in May 2018. Brown allegedly contacted the victim after the crime and taunted her through text. The messages were then provided as evidence for the suit, since they exhibit some vulgar language and refer to some of the lewd behavior described by the accuser. As of right now, the two parties are currently trying to reach a settlement. The lawsuit is on behalf of an artist that received attention from Brown when some of her work was featured in a 2018 charity auction. Her work, which was a painting of Brown, was outstanding enough that it led
of an entirely naked Brown, holding a small towel over his genitals. She did not react and instead elected to continue working. After this response, she claims, it became apparent that she was no longer wanted there. She was paid for two days of work, but she was not allowed back in the house. This occurrence is only one of the complaints and is by far the least graphic. Brown’s lawyer gave a statement in which Brown categorically denied the accusations, claiming that the accusers are merely seeking to extort him for millions of dollars. Brown has turned down a settlement for nearly $2 million, instead of attempting to either entirely clear his name or at the very least lower the monetary impact. The NFL has stated that no action will be taken until after the legal proceedings con-
Antonio Brown claims that he is done with the NFL.
clude, despite rumors that Commissioner Roger Goodell was considering placing Brown on his exemption list. So far, he has been allowed to play with little incident.
courtesy Wikimedia Commons
Although, depending on the outcome of the NFL’s investigation, he could potentially face consequences from the league.
Sports
The Collegian: 6
23 September 2019
Are the Browns overrated, or off to a rough start? Commentary Editor Chris Lierly weighs in on the rollercoaster NFL team that has been dramatically rising and falling in the rankings of pro football. “You are a factory of sadness,” came the famous cry of one embittered Cleveland Browns fan, shouting towards FirstEnergy Stadium in Ohio as if it were alive and sentient. The message of fan frustration seems to have gone unnoticed so far. Anyone who follows America’s most popular sport, even casually, will tell you two things when pressed for information on who’s who in the NFL: the New England Patriots are on top, and the Cleveland Browns are on bottom, and it’s been that
This long standing suffering, which is extremely unlikely in the NFL due to the fact that most teams rebound and win sporadically at the very least, reached its crescendo in 2017, when the Browns became only the second team in modern football history to go 0-16, a perfectly winless season. Two of those 16 losses were in overtime, by the way. In spite of all this failure, there was still hope. In 2018, the Browns drafted Heisman-winning Quarterback Baker Mayfield
averaged 19.4 points per game the season prior. It was a disaster, one that angered the fans who thought they’d finally witness the turning over of a new leaf. If the fans were mad then the pundits weren’t much nicer. Shannon Sharpe of FOX Sports said, “their heads were not where they needed to be.” Stephen A. Smith of ESPN called them, “overhyped,” adding that he expected a Browns loss but that he “did not expect 4313.”
placed by 3rd stringer Luke Falk. They kicked a field goal to get on the board, but the Browns managed to get one of their own before the end of the quarter, heading to the locker room up 16-3. The 3rd quarter saw the Jets finally driving down the field and into the red zone for the first time the whole game. Instead of kicking a field goal on 4th and short, they decided to go for it, a field goal not being of much help anyways. With no one open downfield, Falk went for his
“[The Browns] have lost games in fashions so tragic that Shakespeare could sue for plagiarism if he were alive today.” way since the start of the 21st century. The Browns, since their franchise reboot in 1999 (after a complex relocation saga) have been absolutely terrible, accruing 18 losing seasons in 20 years, with 29 different starting Quarterbacks in that time, none lasting longer than four years. They’ve missed out on superstars in the draft like Ben Roethlesberger, Rob Gronkowski, Le’Veon Bell, and instead drafted busts like Tim Couch, Brady Quinn, and Johnny Manziel. They have lost games in fashions so tragic that Shakespeare could sue for plagiarism if he were alive today. Take for example
from the University of Oklahoma, and they started performing well once he took over as starter, going 7-8-1 on the season, with many of those losses being close, hard fought games that could have easily gone the other way. Mayfield has already endured himself to Cleveland fans, taking advantage of the void left by LeBron James to become Cleveland’s most famous athlete, and some hope he will be the franchise Quarterback to give the team (and the city) stability and leadership for a change. But that’s not all. In the offseason, they made big splashes in free agency. They ac-
The hype, as is common in the NFL, did not match up with reality, leading many to question whether the Browns were just not ready for the season yet, not mentally tough enough yet or just not improved enough. Many were left wondering if the offseason moves were all glamor and no substance, or if the moves did nothing to improve their culture as a team. Emphasis quickly turned to their next game, a Monday Night Matchup against the New York Jets, as a chance for the Browns to prove that their week 1 performance was a fluke. Since the Browns are not used to primetime matchups, being featured in
checkdown option, who wasn’t even past the line of scrimmage, on a terrible play call, ending up about a few feet short of the first down marker, a costly turnover on downs. On the very next play, Mayfield and Beckham Jr. burned the Jets defense for an 89-yard touchdown catch, effectively putting the game out of reach. Neither team scored again, and the game’s final score was 23-3. The biggest story of the night is the Browns’ defense. They pulled a complete and total 180 from their sordid Week 1 performance, manhandling the Jets offense at virtually every turn. They acquired sacks
courtesy Battle Red Blog The Cleveland Browns have had a historically bad history as a franchise.
the time they could have beaten the Kansas City Chiefs if they hadn’t drawn a taunting penalty on the last play of the game, giftwrapping an easy game-winning field goal to their opponent. Or the time they lost to Jacksonville after one of the most controversial referee mistakes in NFL history, prompting enraged fans to throw glass bottles out onto the field, injuring stadium attendees and birthing the scandal now known as Bottlegate. Even when the Browns have been good, it has been marred with bitter disappointment. In 2007, they had a ten win season, their most recent winning season (yes, it’s been twelve years), and yet they still missed out on the playoffs, even though 83.5% of teams with ten win seasons make the playoffs. The last time they made the playoffs at all was in 2002, where they blew a 13-point fourth quarter lead to their rivals in Pittsburgh to lose 36-33. To reiterate, the last time the Browns made the playoffs, Drake was a high schooler in Ontario.
quired star wide receiver Odell Beckham Jr. from the Giants, picked up Kareem Hunt after he was let go by the Chiefs, and they improved their defensive core by acquiring players like Oliver Vernon, Morgan Burnett, and Sheldon Richardson. In short, their team seemed to be the champions of the offseason, primed for a turnaround, a change of luck headed into 2019. That change of luck hit it’s first major roadblock in the season opener. The Browns were at home against the Tennessee Titans, a mediocre team slated to miss the playoffs by most analysts. The Browns went into the game as heavy home favorites, driving down the field quickly to score a touchdown and go up 6-0. Then they missed the extra point, and it was all downhill from there. Three interceptions, penalty problems and risky pass selection were cited as main contributors to their poor performance. Not only did the Browns lose to the Titans, they gave up 43 points to a team that
primetime games less frequently than any other NFL team since the early 2000’s, this game was very important to them. Their opponents have had it rough too, with their starting quarterback Sam Darnold out indefinitely after coming down with mono, of all things. Their replacement QB is the mediocre Trevor Siemian, which is another reason why the Browns were -6.5 favorites, even after their blowout loss. The Browns started the game with all the momentum, capitalizing on an incredible one-handed catch from Beckham Jr. to set up a field goal. They quickly forced a stop, got the ball back and kicked another field goal to go up 6-0. In the second quarter, the Browns went on a drive where they went for it on 4th and two, getting a defensive flag for the first down, followed by a 19-yard touchdown run by RB Nick Chubb. Down 13-0, the Jets finally managed to get some momentum going on the subsequent drive, but Siemian had to leave the field with an apparent leg injury, being re-
15
that killed drive momentum and morale, and they made the Jets Offense seem tired and depleted. What’s more, the Browns’ passing game clicked. It was born-again piety, a textbook case of bipolar disorder and a major statement all in one. For the Browns so far, it’s been a tale of two weeks, and it’s hard to tell which game is more indicative of their skill level. For a team so starved of success, Cleveland fans can only hope they’ll see more of this. But with this big win coming against a rebuilding team with a rookie coach, a sick QB and an injured backup, one can imagine that this win was just a case of a team beating up on a team who is lower than them on the food chain. The Browns play the Rams at home next Sunday, a game that could prove if they are contenders or pretenders.
Sept. 23 - Sept. 29
Monday
Tuesday 23
Wednesday 24
25
M Soccer No Events @ Creighton No Events 7 p.m.
Thursday 26
W Soccer @ USF 6 p.m.
Saturday
Friday 27
28
Sunday 29
W Golf W Golf W Golf vs. Lady vs. Lady vs. Lady Paladin Invit. Paladin Invit. Paladin Invit. 5 p.m. 5 p.m. 5 p.m. Volleyball vs Wichita St. 7 p.m.
M Soccer vs SMU 7 pm
W Soccer @ UCF 12 pm
Volleyball vs ECU 12 p.m.
News
23 September 2019
The Collegian: 7
All clear: TU athletics adopts new clear bag policy The University of Tulsa’s athletic department implemented a common security measure in college athletics. Sydney Sowell Student Writer Clear plastic bag policies are becoming a normal addition to security enhancements in college venues, and the latest in security measures has officially made it to the University of Tulsa. On June 24, the University of Tulsa released its plan to implement a clear bag policy at football and basketball games on campus. Since the football season has officially kicked off, here is some information to make getting through security a breeze. The policy regulates both the size and type of bags that may be carried into the H. Chapman Stadium and the Donald W. Reynolds Center. Only one bag per person is allowed, and it must fall within the following dimensions: clear totes with a 12” x 6” x 12” maximum size, clear one-gallon plastic freezer bags or small clutch purses (these do not have to be clear) no larger than 6.5” x 4.5”. “TU is the second institution in the state of Oklahoma to institute a clear bag policy for its game day venues,” Associate Athletic Director for Internal Operations Kyle Grooms says. Grooms further specifies that the Department of Athletics made the decision to implement the clear bag policy in a collaborative effort with Campus Security. The decision came out of a national trend to maintain safety in venues. According to Grooms, approximately 90 percent of National Collegiate Athletic Association Football Bowl Subdivision (NCAA FBS) institutions currently have a “clear bag” or a “no
The list of prohibited items (left) and the policy on what type of bags you can bring to football and basketball games (right).
bag” policy, and they have reported great success. In previous years, event staff, Police Officers and Campus Security Officers needed to inspect all bags that came into the entry gates at various points around the stadium. With the new clear bag policy, gate screenings are more efficient, reducing wait times for entry and allowing event staff to search the bags without having to physically inspect them for prohibited items. While the basic guidelines of the policy are clear, some exceptions do apply. Diaper bags and bags that are carried out of medical
necessity are allowed, but fans will be asked to go through the medical lane upon entry and their bags will be inspected by security. Other items that may have their own carrying cases, such as binoculars or cameras, are allowed into the stadium but must either be carried or placed in a stadium approved bag. TU Athletics has purchased appropriate bags for all Golden Hurricane Club members and all Season Ticket holders, and has provided clear bags at various student giveaways. However, if you still find yourself without a suitable bag, there are a variety of options for finding a clear bag suitable
photos by Madison Connell
for athletic events. The TU Bookstore sells a clear bag for $12 plus tax, but there are also multiple options for stadium approved bags online. Local shops have even noticed the need for options. LivyLu, a shop in the Pearl District that sells collegiate and local gear, “jumped on the bandwagon,” as owner Tiffany Riley said. More information regarding the University of Tulsa’s new clear policy can be accessed online through the University of Tulsa’s Athletics Department’s website or at https://tulsahurricane.com/ sports/2019/6/17/clear-bag-policy.aspx.
Board offers faculty chance to undo True Commitment, offers new plan Despite restrictions on time and data, administration and faculty senate leadership are hopeful for this new alternative. Chris Lierly Commentary Editor Lindsey Prather Student Writer It has been a tumultuous few weeks for TU’s administration, beginning with the Faculty Senate’s vote to hold TU responsible for violating their constitution and ending with its ramifications: a mounting prospect of a no-confidence vote against Provost Janet Levit. In response to these setbacks, alternatives have been offered by the University’s Board of Trustees in lieu of True Commitment. In the past week, the death of True Commitment became a far-flung possibility when three options were presented. First, the faculty could accept and implement True Commitment. Secondly, the fac-
ulty could propose an alternative plan, with some stipulations. There have been rumors of a third option presented to the faculty, but it was not broched in the Faculty Senate meeting on Sept. 19. Announced in the Faculty Senate following an apparent apology from President Gerard Clancy and Provost Levit, faculty
“... the proposed cuts must be from academics; this immediately removes the possibility of athletics, administrative or any other auxiliary cuts in this new plan.” members were presented with a tempting path to officially kill True Commitment: research, select cuts and construct a new plan — all within the next 30 days. Although the implications of this substitute are considerable, the details regarding what constitutes an acceptable alternative are murky at best and rules are exceptionally, and arguably intentionally, restrictive. When asked about the final product to be presented at the end of the 30-day period, there were no concrete answers. As of yet,
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it appears as though the 30-day timer began on Tuesday Sept. 17 the day that the Board made their offer; this is in spite of the fact that it was only just presented to the Faculty Senate on Thursday. Additionally, it is unclear what will constitute a successful effort when time expires. No indication was given as to whether the
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goal is a report on par with that of True Commitment or even a vague idea regarding where new cuts should take place. The lack of communication regarding these expectations is of immediate concern for the viability of this recourse. An additional area for concern lies in that the new proposed cuts must be from academics; this immediately removes the possibility of athletic, administrative or any other auxiliary cuts in this new plan. Many faculty are concerned that the implications
of deep academic cuts undermine the university’s mission; this could potentially undercut the feasibility of any proposal that shares True Commitment’s goal. All of these issues have arisen in a situation where timing is essential, underscoring the unusual circumstances that have preceded this ultimatum. Despite these obstacles, there is a considerable amount of optimism on behalf of faculty leadership regarding the ability of the Faculty Senate’s assorted committees and task forces to provide a workable foundation for the replacement plan. Faculty Senate President Scott Holmstrom characterized the prospect as a welcome one: “It’s a step in the right direction… I’m hopeful that our work over the next month will help build trust across the university and ultimately identify an agreeable path forward as an institution.” This optimism is mirrored somewhat within the administration. When asked for comment, President Clancy lauded the decision, describing it as “a promising opportunity to explore new options.” Provost Levit declined to comment.
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News
The Collegian: 8
23 September 2019
a parked vehicle and left the scene without providing their information. 5 p.m. An employee working the football game was treated by paramedics for a heat-related illness and evaluated before leaving campus in the care of a family member.
Sept. 12 11: 36 p.m. Officer observed vandalism to a Mayo Village apartment building where unknown suspects painted “TU” on the facade. A work order was submitted with the Physical Plant for the removal of the symbol. Sept. 13 2:20 p.m. Officers investigated a vehicle burglary in the Mabee East Lot. The vehicle was ransacked by unknown suspect but no items were taken and no signs of forced entry. 2:30 p.m. Officers are investigating a report of an employee’s personal items taken from McClure Hall. The items were last seen on 31 JUL 2019 and determined missing on 13 SEP 2019. 4:30 p.m. Officers are investigating a malicious mischief incident that occurred at the Sigma Nu fraternity. Students reported that unknown members of another fraternity threw items at their fraternity house. Sept. 14 10 a.m. Officers towed two vehicles off campus from the Westby Lot. Two vehicles were found parked contrary to university policy and officers were advised by their supervisor to tow them. Both vehicles were towed off of campus without incident.
5:30 p.m. Officers responded to a non-injury motor vehicle accident in the Reynolds Lot. The officers documented the accident and assisted the exchange of information. 6 p.m. Officers responded to a physical altercation in Chapman Stadium between fans during the football game. Upon arrival, the altercation was over and the suspects had already left the scene. Officers gathered information from the victims who left without further incident. 8:40 p.m. Officers are investigating a motor vehicle theft in the 8th & Harvard Lot that occurred on 14 SEP 2019 between 3:15 p.m. and 8:40 p.m. The victim, not affiliated with TU, discovered the vehicle missing after attending the football game. Tulsa Police was contacted and took a report. 10:25 p.m. Officers responded to an ill student at the Kappa Sigma fraternity. Officers met with a student having difficulty breathing but did not want an ambulance. The student returned to their campus residence for the night. Sept. 15 4:25 a.m. Officers conducted a pedestrian check on 3 individuals who were not affiliated with the University of Tulsa on the east side of Keplinger Hall. The 3 individuals each had prior criminal history. No previous contacts were on file and no current warrants. All 3 individuals were warned for trespass and contact cards were completed for each before Officers escorted the individuals off property.
2:55 p.m. A guest attending the football game was treated by paramedics for a heat-related illness and evaluated before leaving campus in the care of a family member.
6:20 p.m. Officers responded to a kitchen fire in a University Square West apartment. The fire, extinguished before officers arrived, caused slight damage to the stove. No injuries were reported and Tulsa Fire Department was cancelled.
4:30 p.m. Officers investigated a hit and run motor vehicle accident in the Norman Village Lot. An unknown driver damaged
6:40 p.m. Officers observed a broken chair in the University Square West swimming pool. Officers removed the chair and ob-
Chris Lierly Commentary Editor Lindsey Prather Student Writer Swedish climate activist Greta Thunberg makes waves at UN Last month, 16-year-old Sweedish climate activist Greta Thunberg landed in New York after sailing across the Atlantic for two weeks. Shs came to the U.S. to attend the United Nations Climate Action Summit, and sailed on a zero emissions yacht to avoid the carbon emissions associated with a commercial jet. Thunberg has caused a stir in Europe by instigating climate protests amongst children her age and provoking those opposed to climate change prevention. Though not the only climate activist her age, Thunberg has become a public voice for the younger people engaged in climate protests. Thunberg hasn’t taken long to catch the ear of American leaders. On Tuesday she told a Senate group tasked with climate policy, “Please save us your praise. We don’t want it.” She went on to tell them to not “invite us here to tell us how inspiring we are without doing anything about it.” Thunberg also testified in front of a subcommittee of the House Committee on foregin affairs. In response to her candidness on climate change policy, Thunberg has said she “was diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome, OCD and selective mutism,” and “that basically means I only speak when I think it’s necessary. Now is one of those moments.”
Saudi Arabia oil facilities attacked, Iran prime suspect On Sept. 14, an attack was carried out by drones and cruise missiles against oil infrastructure in Saudi Arabia. The attack had the potential to severely impact global oil production, as the targeted facilities are by far the largest producers in the nation. Immediately following the attack, President Trump announced on Twitter that Iran was a prime suspect, declaring that the United States was awaiting word from Saudi Arabia to determine what retaliatory actions would be taken. The accusations against Iran were in spite of Yemeni Houthi rebels claiming responsibility for the attack almost immediately, and the President’s words have been the subject of criticism given his apparent willingness to go to war at the request of Saudi Arabia. On Sept. 18, Saudi investigators once again accused Iran of being behind the attacks, citing evidence in the form of debris allegedly recovered from the site of the attack. In response to this evidence, President Trump announced potentially strengthening sanctions against Iran, seeking to economically retaliate for the attacks rather than risk prolonged military engagement.
Liberal Democrats vow to cancel Brexit if they win general election Britain could be facing new elections after the loss of a governing majority by the Conservative government, and this prospect is causing an escalation in rhetoric surrounding Brexit. Following an array of fumbled votes from Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s government, Jo Swinson, the leader of the Liberal Democratic party in the U.K., has decided to emphasize reversing Brexit in the new party platform for upcoming elections. Although traditional proposals to prevent Brexit primarily entail an entirely new referendum, Liberal Dem MPs are seeking to revoke Article 50, a British law that dictates that Brexit must happen. This move is somewhat radical, as this would put a dead stop on present Brexit proceedings with no negotiation or moderation. The party is seeking to capitalize on the disarray that has taken place over the last few weeks in Parliament regarding Brexit, attempting to represent those British citizens that are tired of the drama and uncertainty that has clouded negotiations. The current EU deadline is Oct. 31, and it is presently unclear whether or not Prime Minister Johnson will be able to deliver his promised Brexit plan that will purportedly prevent massive economic crisis in the country.
served a similar chair on the balcony of a nearby apartment. Officers made contact with the residents and determined the chair was in the pool between 14 SEP 2019 at approximately 7:00 p.m. and 15 SEP 2019 at approximately 6:40 p.m. Housing and Physical Plant were notified. Sept. 16 12:05 a.m. Officers responded to a fire alarm in LaFortune Hall and discovered burnt popcorn activated the alarm. Tulsa Fire was cancelled and the fire panel reset. 1 p.m. Officers received an anonymous report of drug paraphernalia inside a Fisher South residence. Officers searched the room and confiscated drugs and drug paraphernalia. 6:15 p.m. Officers were dispatched to University Square West lot to investigate a hit and run motor vehicle accident. Officers spoke with a student who believed someone had hit their vehicle over the weekend. Sept. 17 4:20 p.m. Officers were dispatched to Collins Hall to investigate chalk writing on the steps leading into the building. Officers documented the writing and put in a work order to have the walkway cleaned off. 5:30 p.m. Officers were dispatched to Keplinger/Law lot on a report of a vehicle with a broken window. Officers determined that the vehicle had been burglarized and contacted the owner who advised it happened on 17 SEP 2019 approximately between 7:45 a.m and 5:30 p.m. Officers were unable to determine a suspect at this time and advised the student to file a report with Tulsa Police. 10:55 p.m. Officers and Tulsa Police were called to Norman Village Apartments for a non-university affiliate reporting a strong arm robbery that occurred off-campus at approximately 1st St. & S. Evanston Ave. The victim declined to press charges and refused medical services. Tulsa Police interviewed the victim and transported them from campus property. The Collegian does not produce or edit the Campus Crime Watch except for content and brevity.
Tuesday, September 24 9 a.m. - 5 p.m. True Blue Neighbors Center National Voter Registration Day Open House – True Blue Neighbors Your VOTE is your VOICE! September 24th is National Voter Registration Day. Stop by True Blue Neighbors (on sorority row across from the Student Union) to register or update your voter registration. Tuesday, September 24 6 p.m. - 7:30 p.m. Little Blue Houe
Yoga Night Take a FREE yoga class with a certified instructor and beat that mid-semester stress! Hosted by the Little Blue House. Thursday, September 26 7:30 p.m. - 9 p.m. Lorton Performance Center J. Donald Feagin Visiting Artist Barron Ryan in Piano Recital The University of Tulsa School of Music presents pianist Barron Ryan in concert. Barron, who is a J. Donald Feagin Visiting Artist, will be performing a program of jazz and ragtime inspired music found on his debut album, Classical with Attitude. He will also pay tribute to several iconic jazz pianists who have inspired his own development by replaying their improvised solos as recorded on his new release, The Master’s Apprentice. Friday, September 27 12 p.m. to 1 p.m. College of Law Richard B. Risk CLE Practicum Series: Judith Royster, featured speaker Guest speaker, Professor Judith Royster, will present an Indian Law lecture as part of the Risk CLE Series at TU College of Law. TU College of Law Professor Royster teaches Administrative Law, Civil Procedure, Federal Indian Law, and Native American Natural Resources Law. Her scholarly interests are in the field of American Indian Law, with an emphasis on water rights, energy and mineral issues, and jurisdictional matters. She is an editor of Cohen’s Handbook of Federal Indian Law, the premier treatise in the field; co-author of the first specialized Indian law casebook, Native American Natural Resources Law; and author of more than two dozen law review articles and book chapters. Two of her articles have been cited in U.S. Supreme Court opinions. Professor Royster received the University Faculty Teaching Award in 2007-2008. She is a 1986 graduate of the University of Wisconsin Law School, and clerked for the chief judge of the Western District of Wisconsin. The event is free and open to the public and one CLE credit may be earned free of charge. Lunch will be provided first come, first served basis. RSVP required: tulawalumni@utulsa.edu or 918.631.2529 Monday, September 30 7 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. Harwell Field
Fall Film Festival The Department of Film Studies presents the 10th Annual Fall Film Festival Enjoy student films, both past and present, with popcorn and good company! Enter our raffle for a chance to win a prize! The Collegian does not produce all event descriptions in the Community Calendar. Contact us at news@tucollegian.org with events.
23 September 2019
Commentary
The Collegian: 9
Debate size weakens eventual Democratic nominee
The DNC has made debate qualification rules that will bite them in the end. Hannah Robbins Student Writer Earlier this month, the third of 12 Democratic presidential debates took place. If that isn’t news to you, congrats! You’re in the minority. The Democratic Party isn’t good at advertising the debates, which is honestly their first problem. The glaring issue though isn’t the timing or advertising, it’s the composition. The Democrats have decided on a new set of requirements for the third debate: gain at
least two percent in four qualified polls and 130,000 donors in different states. This can be a tall order for some candidates, and is significantly more strenuous than Republicans in their third debate, where undercard candidates needed to only get one percent in three polls. These restrictions and the single debate format have two effects: they limit the voices of candidates who might have a single issue they want brought up on the national stage (why they run), and they create an echo chamber where homogeneous ideas cause candidates to push further left in an effort to stand out. Neither of these are
lower might be doing so because they have a limited appeal, but anyone who saw Marianne Williamson in the first debate knows that some candidates still have something to offer (maybe just in terms of entertainment, but still) that we would not get with the top tier candidates. Think of Julian Castro. His border wall policies were picked up by almost every candidate during the first debate, and at the time he was polling just above the minimum threshold to be on the stage. With a higher limit, he might have been excluded, just like his policies that are now boilerplate for the remaining candidates.
“The Democratic Party’s current debate format and schedule seems to be weakening the party as a whole.” things I think the Democratic Party should be doing without giving the ideas the consideration they deserve. By limiting the lower tier candidates, they are preventing some important issues to be raised. Candidates that might be polling
The state of the debates has also led to similarities in cornerstone policies becoming normal, especially for healthcare. Healthcare has become a central focus of several debates, with “Medicare for All” becoming a common sound byte. With fewer
and fewer candidates, it seems likely that this shift left will continue as candidates strive to stand out from the basic plan, to abolishing private insurance as Sanders and Warren have promised to do. This push left will not help candidates in the long run; early proposals of this kind have gotten pushback from Republicans and the general public. Healthcare especially has become a silver bullet; with a clear minority of voters preferring abolishing private insurance while several candidates support it. Pushing left won’t help lukewarm reception in the pollsThe Democratic Party’s current debate format and schedule seems to only be weakening the party as a whole, and that will make the Democratic challenger’s job that much harder against Trump. I don’t know who on the Democratic National Committee made these debate decisions, but this current debate criteria is creating debates that aren’t allowing the kind of discussion that will help voters choose the best candidate.
courtesy CNN’s Twitter
The third debate only had one night but ten candidates.
O’Rourke breaks Democratic tradition, confronts gun debate head-on
The former Representative from Texas made a plea and a promise while discussing a mandatory buyback plan for assault weapons. Brayden McCoy Student Writer On Thursday, Sept. 12 at the Democratic debate, Beto O’Rourke boldly and unflinchingly took one of the most resolute stances on gun control in today’s political world. Just last month, O’Rourke called for a mandatory buyback program for assault weapons. This action was used to ask O’Rourke if he is, “proposing taking away their guns, and how would this work?” O’Rourke, without hesitation, replied that he is proposing just that and then launched into a small story that detailed the tragedies caused by
these weapons. Upon finishing that story, he uttered the phrase that has set off debates across the U.S., he said, “Hell, yes, we’re going to take your AR-15, your AK-47.” This heavy handed assertion was immediately applauded by the audience but caused mixed feelings among fellow Democrats. These comments could even cost him the shot at Democratic nomination, yet he refuses to back down. Frankly, this is a good thing. For far too long, Democrats have been carefully tiptoeing around the long held conservative fear that if you give the Democrats control over your weapons, the day will come when they’re busting down your door to take them from you.
plying with “Ask Chuck Schumer what he’s been able to get done … we still don’t have background checks. Didn’t have them when he was in the majority either.” The strongest argument that O’Rourke’s statement was a mistake is the idea that his comments would incite fear in the conservative populace and lead to not only a boom in people buying guns but also an increase in distrust or fear of Democrats. As a matter of fact, a Gun shop in Arkansas used a “Beto Special” in order to draw in customers and the sales results led to the NRA giving him title of “salesman of the month.” However, according to the Washington Post, a recent poll has revealed that 51 percent of voters
“O’Rourke’s unapologetic and blunt approach may just be exactly what’s needed ...” Many such fearful Democrats are trying to place themselves as far from O’Rourke’s claims and desires for a buyback program as they can. Democratic Minority Leader Chuck Schumer even said that, “I don’t know of any other Democrat who agrees with Beto O’Rourke.” In a CNN interview O’Rourke showed no mercy to Schumer, the most powerful Democrat in the Senate, re-
are in favor of a mandatory buyback program while only 36 percent are against it. This sheds light into how the influential conservatives are obstructing gun control through fear mongering and other despicable tactics. A stronger stance for gun control and the removal of assault rifles from the
consumer market are in the best interest of the american people. Far too many school shootings and mass killing sprees are attributed to these weapons. They are not useful for hunting and frankly should have no place on the streets and within reach of dangerous individuals. Some argue that any other weapons, such as pistols or knives, can still be used in attacks on schools and killing sprees. O’Rourke’s unapologetic and blunt approach may just be exactly what’s needed to help bring gun control to a nation that is desperately in need of it. If anything, his unshakeable stance gives him a more appealing and trustworthy quality than most other politicians who try and curry favor with everyone, taking no real strides in the direction of progress. Only time will tell whether O’Rourke’s comments ultimately cost him the nomination, but regardless, his boldness should serve as an example to future leaders and politicians that when it is time for change, change must be made boldly and sincerely. If you’re interested in making change, don’t be fooled into thinking your vote doesn’t. Get out and vote this year!
In our Sept. 9 issue, The Collegian ran a Commentary article with outdated information. The article erroneously claimed that organizations need two forms of advertisement in order to be eligible for SA funding. This policy no longer exists — organizations need only advertise enough to ensure wellattendance.
O’Rourke’s comments have not gone over well with conservatives.
courtesy Wikimedia Commons
The Collegian: 10
Commentary
23 September 2019
Yang’s “Freedom Dividend” more radical than meets the eye
By giving $1,000 to each citizen, the plan would help fight multiple forms of inequality. Zach Short Student Writer Andrew Yang’s most radical plan has certainly gained him some attention, both good and bad, in the Democratic presidential primaries. For those who may be unfamiliar, he calls it the “Freedom Dividend” and has established very simple rules for how it will function: It would provide a standard $1,000 per month additional salary for all American adults, regardless of who they are. At first, it seemed like nothing more than a cheap gimmick to gain some name recognition. I mean, I can say that as an 18-year-old voter who had never heard of Andrew Yang, it certainly caught my attention when I first heard about it. If nothing else, it served that purpose, as he made the list of top-ten contenders for the democratic nomination. But
programs. McGovern ultimately initiated some party infighting and lost the general election to Richard Nixon in a 520-17 defeat where he only won D.C. and Massachusetts. The more recent history of the plan was its limited use by a non-profit in Mississippi, in which twenty single black mothers with relatively low incomes were given $1,000 per month in an effort to allow them to pull themselves out of poverty. The Washington Examiner detailed it in an opinion piece, one that was vehemently opposed to the idea and focused on how many of the women involved spent money on things that were more superficial, like a multitude of Christmas presents or expensive hairstyles, and to take sick days for the first time. The piece’s harshest criticism was that nearly no money was actually saved by anyone in the experimental group. Hearing these stories may make the idea seem not only radical, but also as a stupid platform for a presidential candidate. But is it? The author of the piece in The Washington Examiner, Eddie Scarry, was hyper-critical of the plan in that none of the money was saved, but let’s take a deeper look at that. First, Scarry could not in good conscience omit the fact that the women also took steps to pay off overdue bills. He included this fact in his piece, but hardly talked about it — an enormous oversight. The first and probably most important step to escaping poverty and accumulating wealth is to get out of debt, which the women in the ex-
“Giving money to impoverished communities is a win-win scenario.” is it merely a political gimmick, or could he actually be onto something? First, let’s look at some of the history surrounding the idea of a universal basic income. The first time the idea ever reached national significance was during the 1972 presidential race, in which Democratic candidate George McGovern advocated for it as a simpler alternative to social security
periment started to do immediately. Second, Scarry had no qualms about criticizing the women for blowing all the money on gifts and fashion — products that are completely discretionary. However, he failed to mention how these are observably very common money vacuums for middle- and upper-class people. Luxuries that are taken for granted in bourgeois lifestyle were granted to the
General Motors strike a result of disloyalty to workers
After getting bailed out in 2008, GM did not respond in a similar way toward its employees. Adam Walsh Student Writer For those of you just joining the resurgence of labor rights activism, the leaders of the United Auto Workers union called upon 48,000 members to strike against working conditions at General Motors. The strike follows the expiration of an agreement between GM and the UAW, which holds contracts with all of the major auto manufacturers. When one of these contracts expires, a deal must be renegotiated, which includes a show of force, hence the strike. Side effects to such a strike may include, but are not limited to, increased cost for GM products, furloughing (temporary layoffs) of workers unassociated with the union, reduction in wages and ripple effects across supply chains, ruining smaller companies. The UAW leaders have demanded greater profit sharing among the workforce, a reduction in temporary workers, increased benefits and a pullback on GM’s planned plant closings in the United States and Canada. GM had a new agreement prepared for the expiration of UAW’s contract with them, but the union leaders decided that the con-
time to understand, but the teacher strike began. The difference between these two scenarios is the existence of a prepared deal before the strike began. The teachers were striking from a position of nothing, but the UAW workers had all the strength in the world. When their contract with GM previously expired in 2007, the strike lasted two days. An agreement was reached and the strike went away. It seems foolish for GM to not offer a deal that goes above their expectations, especially when it causes thousands of people unrelated to the strike their livelihoods. GM has temporarily fired several thousand workers instead of paying an idle plant’s workforce, smaller tributary companies that funnel into GM’s production cycle now have an inventory that is unsellable, striking workers now make $250 a week instead of $900 and I got a two on my AP calc exam. While these workers have a right to strike, one cannot simply ignore the position they were in prior to the present. Although the looming presence of plant closures is concerning, some of these people were making some real money. Salaries at GM range from $30,000 a year to $120,000, with positions meeting the national average or going above it, but GM has a nasty streak of letting workers ride the line between full-time and part-time employment. If one works fulltime, the employer must take certain actions towards providing benefits like health insurance, but these requirements do not necessarily apply to part-time workers, so bosses schedule workers close to forty hours a week, but do not let them hit that number. It is a scummy, underhanded practice, and it affects more than GM. Ever wonder why your summer job boss never scheduled above a certain hour limit, even when most of your coworkers were about as reliable as peace in the Middle East?
women in the experimental group for the first time in a long time, if not the first time ever. Looking further, there are other reasons that the experiment was a success and why the implementation of the Freedom Dividend could be successful. One of the biggest reasons that made the experiment a success was the fact that they spent almost all the money. For those who may not be aware: spending money is a good thing. Giving money to impoverished communities is a win-win scenario. If they save it, they can accumulate wealth and be financially de-
money out to every American over the age of eighteen, thus giving support to many people who could be fine without it. Strangely enough, this is actually another strength of the proposition. First, it removes all the potentially lengthy screening processes that would keep the program to those in poverty, making the program easier to run. Nobody has to try to qualify or go through a vetting process (that would surely be hell if run by the government), the money is just given out after a person turns eighteen. Second, the proposition is actually a little bit ahead of a problem that could grow to be much worse.
“The Freedom Dividend provides support should a job be lost and another job not be quickly found.” pendent. If they spend it, then the program will be funding their wants, their needs and a better lifestyle while the money works its way back up into the pockets of America’s richest, who will take most of the tax burden for the program. Therefore, in respect to whom the program would help most, there is no losing scenario. Additionally, yes, the money was thrown into mostly superficial purchases in the experiment, but that was not a long-term test. Consider the possibility of a change similar to that of Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Once a threshold is reached on a base-level need, and it no longer need to be constantly sought after, people can turn their attention to the next level up. In Maslow’s model, people would move from seeking out basic necessities like food and shelter to seeking out safety and security and then on to friendship and abstract needs. In this case, people would start by spending money on small purchases and then move on to greater wants and needs. After, say, a year or so, saving for a larger house may become the most attractive option. People will learn how to save. Time, it is said, heals all wounds. Maybe it could alleviate the problems in Yang’s plan too. The last issue taken frequently against the Freedom Dividend is the fact that it gives
The world we live in is growing more automated every single day. Electronics are taking jobs away from people, and they are doing it faster than anything else. The Freedom Dividend provides support should a job be lost and another job not be quickly found. Perhaps that is why the only tech entrepreneur on the debate stage supports the idea, and it also may be why he is supported by fellow tech giant Elon Musk. The Freedom Dividend has been very harshly criticized as being too radical, but is it really that extreme? Perhaps instead of considering the proposition in terms of what we know and expect from politics, we should consider it based on how it could actually change the way we live. The only other qualm I’ve even heard about the idea is that people would just stop working, but that just isn’t true. People want to work and make lives for themselves, and those who don’t would not be living lavishly on the legislation. The strong parts of the idea more than make up for the weak. Why don’t we stop just hearing Andrew Yang, and start listening?
Though it resulted in a hundred people marching in the desert, the original idea might be better suited for larger causes.
use our voices to enforce positive change in the world.” One subcategory of Area 51 memes were centered around the stereotypical millennial (and now Generation Z) depression. People were fine getting shot at Area 51 because they already wanted to die; why not prove the existence of aliens while doing it? Not to get existential, but with such an intense political climate at the moment, with so many begging for change with little action towards it, why can’t this attitude be put into enacting change that will improve the lives of millions of people? When things are joked about they gather more traction: the Area 51 raid got its popularity because of how ridiculous it is, but when it comes to real social issues, such as the current state of healthcare or climate change, very few want to take action to speak out against it. A global climate strike happened the same day as the Area 51 raid, but had much less coverage because everyone wanted to see an idiot get shot rather than see people fighting over arguably more pressing issues. People will joke about the government hiding extraterrestrial technology before they admit that their government structures are failing them and killing the world. Not to say that one of those isn’t much less to take in than the other, but imagine what could have happened if all 2 million people that signed up to raid Area 51 actually showed up, then imagine that they stormed DC for change. This fun internet joke shows how committed some people be, and how far radical ideas can be spread, but just like here, a lot of people talk a big game but won’t show up to actually create change.
Revolutionary rhetoric utilized in Area 51 craze
Caleb Pinegar Student Writer In June, a college student posted a Facebook event titled “storm area 51, they can’t stop all of us,” which was scheduled to take place on Sept. 20, 2019. At first, it just seemed like a dumb joke, and the memes poured out. At the beginning of September, everyone was wondering if anyone would actually go through with storming Area 51. Over 2 million people had said they were going on Facebook, but the event was clearly facetious, and most people said they were going as a joke. On the actual morning of Sept. 20, everyone was wondering how the event was going to turn out: Were we finally going to find out in aliens are real? Or was everyone that showed up just going to get shot? The actuality of the event ended up much less exciting than anyone hoped. Only around 100 people showed up, and only one was arrested for public urination. The memes and internet hysteria over this event, however, had an odd impact on everyone. The original title of the event ended with “they can’t stop all of us” and directly pointed to the fact that, if 2 million people had shown up to Area 51, the day would have gone much differently.. Current internet culture is full of people jokingly saying “let’s use the overwhelming force of depressed millennials to raid area 51” rather than “let’s
“... GM has a nasty streak of letting workers ride the line between full-time and part-time employment.” tract did not answer their demands on profit sharing and temp workers, so they rejected it, kicking off a long, arduous struggle until one side capitulates. If one was in Oklahoma two years ago, they would have seen what such a prolonged struggle costs. Oklahoma teachers cannot legally have a labor union, but leaders among the teachers received approval to strike. Of course, a strike has to affect people directly, which means it took place during the school year. I was taking four AP exams that year, and while I was not concerned about the history and English ones, I was terrified of the calculus BC test. My class had barely made it to series and sequences, something I desperately needed
GM has employed underhanded, shady practices and is attempting to outwait the strikers. They offered a deal, but it was decided the deal was not enough, and the UAW has a right to be pissed. When the recession hit GM in 2008, those workers stayed with GM through the dark times, taking pay cuts and reduced hours, and what happened? They want a greater share of the pie in return for their loyalty, but GM is so hamfisted with their dollar bills that they will not capitulate. GM received a government bailout, but it is far more difficult to bail out 48,000 workers and their families. GM should reward loyalty, not spurn the most honorable segment of their workforce.
The raid at Area 51 resulted in one arrest.
courtesy of Wikimedia Commons
23 September 2019
Commentary
The Collegian: 11
Trump administration’s vaping School lunches pose problems that many schools haven’t answered ban misguided, not punitive Teenagers are alredy addicted to nicotine, so banning e-cigs and Juuls will push them to tobacco. Caleb Pinegar Student Writer Vapes, e-cigarettes, Juuls — years ago they seemed like the solution to a nationwide smoking problem. Recently, however, the movement towards electronic cigarettes has received backlash due to a number of deaths of vape users and the rising number of companies stating they don’t know the dangers of vaping. A week ago, Trump announced that he would enact a nationwide ban on flavored vape products, citing the rise of underage users as the main cause. However, this ban ignores the larger problems, like how enacting a ban after so many people rely on cigarette alternatives will either push people back to cigarettes or make them buy from illegal black market vendors, which is a considerably more dangerous choice. When vapes and e-cigs first came out, it took time for people to make the switch over from cigarettes to vapes; now, in 2019, it’s much more common to see someone hitting a Juul than it is to see someone taking a smoke break. This ban might reverse that and push already nicotine addicted minors over to cigarettes to keep a source of an addictive chemical. This switch will cause them to subject themselves, and others, to the dangers of cigarettes. Despite not knowing the full long-term effects of vaping, it is a commonly held belief that it is a far safer alternative to cigarettes and that it doesn’t lead to second-hand smoke the way cigarettes do. The issue with Trump’s plan is that young people are already addicted. Pushing young people away from vaping should be
done with the more typical scaremongering techniques of companies like Rise Above and The Real Cost, not by fully cutting off a source and inadvertently pushing kids to cigarettes. Although the teen vaping epidemic is obviously a problem, a ban will not fix this problem, at least not in a way that anyone wants. Recently, the CDC reported that seven people had died due to vaping, yet after deeper investigations, it was found those deaths were caused by thc cartridges that had a high level of vitamin E oil as the base. By enacting a ban on flavored vape products, many people will turn away from FDA approved companies, such as Juul, to sketchy black market pods with no knowledge of what comes in them, other than nicotine or THC. This poses a high risk and creates an even bigger problem; no one wants minors to become addicted to anything, but they already are. This ban doesn’t address the reality of the issue: the widespread nature of vaping. Many people who are addicted to substances have no problem gaining access to the blackmarket, and by preventing access to FDA approved companies, people will be pushed to back alleys and drug dealers. For some, this can lead to worse outcomes than a simple nicotine addiction. Trump’s decision was in good faith to prevent the rise of addiction in youth, yet the way he went about it was not in the right place. Cutting off a safe supply source will only cause people to turn to alternatives that can harm them. There are many ways to deter minors from vaping, such as taxing products or raising the legal age so their older friends can no longer buy them products. Instead of enacting a ban that affects all vape users, a better alternative would be to find a way to target the younger users in an effective way.
TU students often must plan their eating schdule around how many meal swipes they have left. Nora Bethune Student Writer In the average school, there was always the favored time of day with school lunches. The topic of what would be served was in everyone’s conversation, even if it was just a quick ask and answer. TBut the negative side of this was when kids couldn’t pay. At my specific school, students would receive a series of warnings from the staff, and eventually they would be served the simple ham and cheese sandwich. Now that we have gone to college, things are different, but if it’s the lunch options are better is up for debate. You may ask: What happens when you run out of swipes? I didn’t even know, even after looking through the Tulsa website. I went to a lunch lady to ask what happens when a student runsyou run out of swipes.? She informed me that once you run out, you simply can no longern’t enter the dining center. Whether this is better or worse
is up for debate. Having used up limited meals, and limited dining dollars, students can’t even eat. Now upgrading your meal plan or adding dining dollars is a theoretically viable one solution, but students who are spending countless dollars on housing, tuition, and a variety of other college student expenses might notw be able to spare the whopping $15 it would cost to enter the dining center, or spend the money to buy food in the student union. A student, who wishes to remain nameless, has the eight-meal plan. They expressed to me how unfair it is that theyshe must gamble every day when they want to eat and having to tell their friends that they used their swipe for the day. At first, their plan was to save their dining dollars for the end of the semester towards exams when they wanted to grab something fast. But hunger isn’t something that can be easily scheduled. They’ve been using their swipes and dining dollars, expressing that they don’t even think they can make it to the end of the semester, and they worry about what will happen when they run out of dining dollars and are dependent on the one meal a day plan. Too nervous to ask their parents for money, they are in quite the situation. Are the meal plans setting up students to be embarrassed or to run out of swipes purposely? Is there a way or strategy for students to be able to eat? Should eating be free to students? There’s so many different questions to the topic of school lunches, but I believe that something as important as eating should be made available to everyone on campus, and not something that they should have to worry about.
The portrayal of disability in the media
Madison Connell News Editor In my last article, I tackled the idea that disability is largely invisible, both in our day-to-day lives and in pop culture. In the last decade or so, visibility has somewhat increased in our media. The problem is, it’s not always positive representation. When disability is shown in television, movies and books, it often falls into a few common tropes: inspiration porn, faking it, existing only in a binary and a hatred towards the disability. Inspiration porn is the trope everyone sees but not everyone recognizes. Disability activist Stella Young coined the term, describing it as “an image of a person with a disability, often a kid, doing something completely ordinary — like playing, or talking, or running — carrying a caption like ‘your excuse is invalid.’” She continues that, “It’s there so that non-disabled people can put their worries into perspective … It’s there so that nondisabled people can look at us and think ‘Well, it could be worse … I could be that person.’” While the intent of the producers of these stories and videos are mostly positive, it puts an odd spin on the day-to-day life of disabled people. Sometimes inspiration porn takes the part of a person doing something ordinary such as “overcoming” the disability by doing a task that most able-bodied people can do. The narrative displayed is “this one person can do this despite their disability, so I should too!” The “despite” narrative implies disabled people are generally incapable, unless “despiting” their disability. The “inspirational” accomplishments of one person puts the burden of others with disabilities to push themselves to accomplishing the same thing. On social media, videos circulate of little kids who were promised to never walk strutting their first steps. These accomplishments are major for those experiencing them, but not every person who uses a mobility aid can
walk unassisted. Disabilities widely range even within the same diagnosis, and it’s not realistic to set the same expectation to everyone. Disabled people can’t and shouldn’t set the bar for activities at the same level as those without disabilities or those who doesn’t have the same limitations. Just because one person who couldn’t walk can now run a marathon doesn’t mean that every person in a wheelchair should be able to “overcome” the inability to walk. And more than disabled people setting these expectations for themselves, people without disabilities shouldn’t set these expectations for others based on a viral video. Another common trope I see is the disabled person was faking it all along. Munchausen and Munchausen-by-proxy (which is a syndrome that causes people to believe and cause conditions that they do not have, while by-proxy is caused by someone near them) are real conditions that require psychiatric and medical intervention. Representation of any disorder is a generally positive idea, but with the over-representation of this condition it implies that many people who have genetic or acquired health conditions might be otherwise causing harm to themselves.
mizing all of the positive representation in the first place. The “faking it” trope is one of the more dangerous phenomena. These stand-out cases in media have the chance to slant even doctors’ perceptions of disability. Skepticism leads to lack in belief of disabled peoples’ experiences, making doctors double or triple check your symptoms before listening to you. In the workplace and in education, it can cause a similar reaction when asking for accommodations. Playing into the last trope is the idea that disability exists in a binary. People either are paralyzed, or they don’t need a wheelchair; people are either depressed, or are light and bubbly; people are blind, or they have nearperfect vision. A statistic I’ve seen floating around the internet is that it’s estimated that 90 percent of wheelchair users have some function of their legs. These people are often “ambulatory,” or don’t need to use a mobility aid full-time. However, in television, movies and other visual media, wheelchair users are almost exclusively kept in their chairs. While this trope might not sound as harmful, it perpetuates the “faking it” aspect in real life. I’m an ambulatory wheelchair
“Disabled people can’t and shouldn’t set the bar for activities at the same level as those without disabilities ...” One prominent example — other than TV doctor shows, which inevitably show Munchausen — that I’ve seen in the media in recent years is in the book and movieadaptation of “Everything, Everything.” The young-adult romance centers around 18 year-old Maddy who has SCID, Severe Combined Immunodeficiency. Her mom keeps her in the disease-free bubble of her house. Later in the movie, we find out that no doctor ever ordered any tests proving that Maddy was in fact immunocompromised. All along her mother kept her in the bubble of her house to make sure her daughter did not come across an untimely death due to the mom’s own fears. In the process, the mother lowered Maddy’s immune system, causing actual health conditions to arise. Maddy and the audience do not find out that she does not in fact have SCID until the later third of the movie. With this snap realization, all of the representation of SCID turns into a narrative of “faking it,” delegiti-
user myself, which means I can walk short distances before needing assistance most days. For classes, I often transfer into one of the desks. Because of this lack of representation of disability on a spectrum, people will often stare at my legs after I perform a task out of my chair. Media trains viewers that people either have no use or all the use on their legs, or that blind people can always see nothing at all, or that moods are stagnant. Like other intersectionalities of race, gender and sexuality, disability is a spectrum. Hatred towards disability from the disabled person themselves is another common trope. Some of these are more subtle than others. One subtler example is Artie in “Glee.” In one episode, Artie is seen dreaming about dancing out of his wheelchair. While this might be the experience of some wheelchair users, many actually see their chair or other mobility aids as empowering, helping them get to where they need. Wheelchair users effectively see it as their own legs.
And “Glee” isn’t the only one to use this trope. It’s an almost inevitable dream sequence for any character in a wheelchair, implying its inevitable for all disabled people to hate their disability. A more extreme example is displayed in “Detective Pikachu.” Howard Clifford pushes the hatred to a new level: the disabled supervillain. Because of his extreme hatred toward his disability and how it limits him, Clifford decides he will take over Pokémon’s bodies to be able to utilize his body however he wants. Not all disabled people harbor anger towards their bodies. Many celebrate their experiences as part of the diverse possibilities of life. Sometimes people are born with what they have and can’t see their life any other way; others grow into their disability but come to embrace their differences as part of the inevitable. Even those that do harbor some dissatisfaction most likely do not have supervillain motives to take over able-bodied people or animal-like creatures. Disabled people are complete people too, even with our differences and limitations. Part of the perpetuation of these tropes and others is from the lack of representation in those that perform, write and produce media that features disabled characters. White people playing POC or straight or cisgender people playing queer characters is more and more seen as unacceptable, but many productions still don’t properly include disabled people in work about them. A common saying for this lack of representation in media and in decisions around disability is “Nothing About Us Without Us!” People that don’t walk or roll a mile in disabled peoples’ lives don’t understand the nuances to disability. What they know about disability often results from the media they consume, which in turn is affected by these tired stereotypes of our lives. None of this can change overnight. Ableism can be challenged in our media, but the viewpoints are not going to change until our views of disability change. The more we talk about these problematic representations, the more pressure media producers have to include ethical representations. Disabled people deserve to be in diverse amount of genres other than sick literature that revolves around the disability. Disabled people deserve to be the lover in a romance, the hero in an action movie, the detective in a mystery. We deserve to be villains, but not just resulting from our “incompleteness.” Disabled people deserve to be the leads of more than their own lives.
Variety
The Collegian: 12
23 September 2019
Joe Hight discusses mental health in newest book
Pulitzer Prize winning writer Joe Hight reflects on his brother’s death in “Unnecessary Sorrow.” Madison Walters Student Writer Joe Hight launches new novel, Unnecessary Sorrow “We need to continue having discussions over mental illness. We need to remove the negative stigma that surrounds mental illness.” Joe Hight urged the audience attending his book launch to not be afraid of discussing mental illness. The book launch was for Hight’s new novel, “Unnecessary Sorrow.” Hight wanted to write this book to help people and to generate discussions by telling his brother’s story. Hight is an acclaimed journalist who has won a Pulitzer Prize in National Reporting. He is also a member of the Oklahoma Journalism Hall of Fame. He is currently a professor at the University of Central Oklahoma. “Unnecessary Sorrow” is a compelling narrative about Hight’s oldest brother, Paul. The novel details the struggles and trials Paul faced because of his mental illness. He was laicized from priesthood in 1975 because of his diagnosis of schizophrenia. In December 2000, Paul was killed by the Oklahoma City Police.
“Unnecessary Sorrow” has been ten years in the making. Hight went through a 150page police report to find information for his novel. He also read through his brother’s writings. In Paul’s writings, he wrote, “I missed my true vocation, which was to help people.” During his book launch, Hight told the audience that his brother did not first experience symptoms of schizophrenia until the 1970s. His first crisis occurred while at church: He was found staring directly at the sun in a catatonic state. After this, incidences began to occur more and more. Hight also shed light onto a study completed in Australia in 2012. In this study, it was ascertained that there is a correlation between late stage mumps and schizophrenia. Paul had contracted late stage mumps while at Seminary school. Hight believes that this, coupled with the stress of Seminary school, led to his brother’s development of schizophrenia. Hight wants everyone to remember his brother for who he was and not for his mental illness: “I want you to think of Paul as a human being who loved, smiled and laughed.” Hight recalls that his brother was a kind person who would give away everything to someone less fortunate. He would get in trouble with his superiors at the church for giving away so many of his possessions. Paul was the type of person who would welcome anyone that knocked on his
front door, literally. During the book launch, Elena Hight, Joe Hight’s daughter, sang a song that she had written about Paul. The song is titled, “My Uncle.” In this song she sings, “How was I supposed to know, you’d never come back home.” Many audience members were visibly touched by her beautiful tribute to her late uncle. After this, Matt Gleason, the moderator, began a Q&A with Hight. He was asked what led Paul to joining the priesthood. Hight said that it felt like destiny was calling Paul to priesthood. He also thinks that the death of his infant sister had a role in Paul’s desire to become a priest. Hight told the audience about the first time Paul had been shot by the police. After he was laicized, he began a relationship with a nurse. A few months into the relationship, the nurse was killed by her son. This tragic event led to a momentary crisis for Paul. This crisis was the cause of the police being called on him. The officer who was on duty ended up shooting Paul in the stomach during the disturbance. Paul miraculously survived this injury. Paul’s medication for schizophrenia were monthly shots that helped stabilize him. In Dec. 2000, a snow storm broke out and Paul was unable to receive his monthly shot due to being isolated in his apartment. Paul had another momentary crisis and it was reported that he was wielding a knife. The Oklahoma City Police were called in to the
scene. Three officers approached Paul and he charged at them. He was shot three times. He died on his own doorstep, where he had welcomed so many people with open arms. Hight hired a private investigator who found evidence that Paul, in fact, did not have a knife in his possession during the crisis. The biggest proof of this is that there is no photo that exists of Paul’s body with the knife. Gleason made the point: “You wouldn’t shoot Paul if he had mumps. You’d put him in jail. Our state does not prioritize mental illness.” Gleason went on to say that the state doesn’t treat mental illness the same as a physical illness would be treated; even though, they are in fact the same. Hight said, “I think there’s a discrimination against those who have schizophrenia.” Hight finished his discussion with a plea to the audience. He asked the audience to, “please help others. To me, that’s a vocation we should all have.” He also went on to describe how important forgiveness is in situations like this. As the discussion ended, an audience member stood up and said that almost the exact same thing happened to his brother. He let his fellow audience members know that there is a local crisis team that offers 24/7 support. The organization is called Copes Tulsa. The support phone number is (918)-744-4800. Unnecessary Sorrow is available for purchase at Magic City Books and Amazon.
photo by Madison Walters
Joe Hight discussed the life of his older brother, Paul Hight, at the launch of “Unnecessary Sorrow.”
Peace Pole Project celebrates International Peace Day Students and faculty painted fence posts dedicated to an international celebration of peace. Sydney Sowell Student Writer Students and faculty came together last week to celebrate the merging of the International Students Services and the Center for Global Education by participating in the Peace Pole Project. The Peace Pole Project tradition originated in Japan in the 1950s.
Masahisa Goi, a man who was affected by the destruction of Hiroshima and Nagasaki in World War II, inspired the project. His
cated in every country, encouraging people to foster peace by transcending differences and celebrating commonalities.
“The end result was a stunning series of vibrant peace poles ...” message, “May Peace Prevail on Earth,” remains the motto of the international movement to this day. Peace Poles are now lo-
Junior Christina Helgeston decorates a fence post to celebrate International Peace Day.
Kucko, Vice Provost for Global Education at TU, read about the project three years ago, but the new Center for Global Edu-
photo by Sydney Sowell
cation gave her the perfect opportunity to jumpstart the project. Dr. Kucko, with the help of Morgan Hopson, a Global Education Advisor in CGE, brought the movement to the university’s campus just in time for International Peace Day on Sept. 21. Student volunteers helped run tables by the side entrance of the Student Union between Sept. 16-19, inviting members of the TU community to pick up a paint brush and express what reminds them of or inspires peace within themselves. By the end of Thursday, the wooden poles were filled with various pictures and phrases that evoked a sense of peace for students and faculty across campus. The end result was a stunning series of vibrant peace poles that were presented in a ceremony on Friday, Sept. 20. It may have been raining on Friday, but that didn’t prevent people from coming together at the Peace Pole Presentation. The poles all stood tall in Hurricane Plaza as presentation began with a moment of silence in recognition of International Peace Day. TU junior Paris Clark shared some words on her understanding of peace and wonderful experiences with international students. Clark began her thoughts with her idea of peace. “The underlying base of peace is respect,” she stated. Respect allows people to develop sincere relationships. Clark also encouraged domestic students to step up and start a conversation, because every student, domestic or international, has the ability to connect through their stories. Following the event, the peace poles will be taken to an alumni event so they too can take part in the Peace Pole Project. Dr. Kucko said that students also suggested that the poles then either be auctioned off or given to United Way, a non-profit organization that has a global reach. Looking forward, Dr. Kucko plans to make this an annual event, and although this year the event may have been small, it was one step toward making a larger impact.
Variety
23 September 2019
The Collegian: 13
Philbrook’s “Wondrous Worlds” teaches about Islam The exhibition showcases art from all over the world and spanning several centuries, exploring the influence of Islam. Gabe Powell Student Writer The Philbrook Museum of Art is hosting an exhibit boasting over 100 works spanning 1,200 years of Islamic history and influence. It will run until Oct. 6. The display features pieces on loan from the Newark Museum in New Jersey. The exhibit was designed with five themes in mind: clothing style, writing, architecture, hospitality and cross-cultural exchange. The collection features work from such diverse and historically distinct regions like Southeast Asia, North and West Africa and the Middle East. The broad geographic range of artistic depictions showcases the
deep impact of Islam on the ancient world and its modern influence. Some of the artwork includes ornate jewelry, furniture, metalwork and ceramics. Included in the room are modern paintings, photographs and sculptures showing a reinterpretation of ancient styles and religious motifs.
blue covered jars to the side of the bowl that have intricate geometric designs. These jars, called jobbana, are commonly used to store a special soup-harira-made during the month of Ramadan. These pieces date from the late 18th to the early 20th century. To the right of the pottery is a Egyptian tent panel from the early 1900s. This would be hung
“The collection features work from such diverse and historically distinct regions ...” Prominently displayed in the front of the room is a case containing ornate pottery from Morocco. The large bowl in the middle of the case is teal-colored and has an eight-pointed star in the middle of the bowl. This ornately decorated bowl would have been used during the month of Ramadan, where observers gather in the evening to break their religious fast. There are two
to create a decorative environment for a celebration or wedding. Stitched into the wool are blessings and guidance for life. There is more than just pottery or jewelry on display however: the exhibit also contains weaponry from various parts of the Islamic world. One impressive example of this is a display case containing an impressive double-edged blade, a pair of pistols
and a sword. The flintlock pistols date from the 18th century Ottoman era, and they are composed of steel overlaid with gold. There is an inscribed blunderbuss from the same era composed of wood and steel with silver furnishings. The daggers hail from late 1800s Sudan and have a crocodile skin sheath. The arm guard on the right of the photo is from early 19th century Iran. You can find the exhibit on the Main Level of the museum to the left of the entrance. Upon entering the museum you should be in a rotunda and see an admissions desk to the right where you should any direct questions. University of Tusa students get in free with college ID, and admission is free for all visitors on the second Saturday of every month. The museum is located on 2727 South Rockford Road, and is open from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. on Wednesday through Sunday with extended hours from 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. on Fridays.
photo by Gabe Powell
The bowl and jars used to break the Ramadan fast is displayed at the entrance of the exhibit.
Circle Cinema screens “In Fabric” for Art House Day Circle Cinema celebrated Art House Day by playing “In Fabric,” a horror movie about a killer dress. Justin Klopfer Student Writer Last Wednesday, Sept. 18, was Art House Theater day. To celebrate, theaters across America and Canada had special screenings of several art house films. One of these films was Peter Strickland’s 2018 horror-comedy “In Fabric,” shown in advance of its December 2019 U.S. release. Local independent theater Circle Cinema participated in the event by showing this film.
ends in a store-wide brawl started by a classic slapstick-style escalation of violence. Fatma Mohamed’s performance is the highlight of the comedy; she delivers cryptically poetic lines to all of her customers. Leo Bill also delivers a hilarious performance as an insipid washing machine repairman, literally boring his peers into a stupor with his jargon. All of these unique elements come together to forge an incredibly interesting experience. The tone of the film is far from consistent, but this is part of what gives it its charm. A grand explanation for the events of the film is never explicitly given. Many scenes within it seem like grand plot reveals, but are never extended upon; the
“The tone of the film is far from consistent, but this is part of what gives it its charm.” The film centers around an ominous department store with an incredibly eerie saleswoman (Fatma Mohamed) who sells a middle-aged divorcee (Marianne JeanBaptiste) a red dress. The dress then moves between two more characters, causing horrifying results for all. Almost every scene in the film is unforgettable. Nothing is off limits for Strickland: gore, sexual taboos, noise to break your eardrums and even an intense game of Sorry. One important point must be made: a dress isn’t scary. In fact, the film in general is surprisingly unscary for a horror movie. The tone of the film is much better described as unnerving. The employees of the department store eerily beckon with their hands to shoppers at the beginning of each business day. Throughout the film, short interjections of seemingly random visual collages interrupt the plot, often ended by an eerie noise and mannequin’s hand. A commercial for the department store is also shown several times throughout the film, each time becoming more distorted and sinister. “In Fabric” also incorporates humor throughout its two hours run time. The film
movie is a series of dead ends. The end of the film offers a satisfactory closure to the narrative, but does so without spoiling the enticing sense of uncertainty throughout the movie. The movie avoids any central theme. The dress seems to represent romantic failure and the viciousness of consumerism simultaneously. The various symbols and recurring motifs also add many intertwining ideas, all wrapped around the ongoing slasher story. Overall, “In Fabric” seems more concerned with possessing a certain aesthetic than it is with possessing complex themes. Or, rather, interpretation of its imagery is left up to the viewer, letting them come up with their own “meaning” of the film. This artistic philosophy is in line with the general ethos of art house film, making it an absolutely perfect choice for celebrating this important event. “In Fabric” will be released by A24 for normal showing in US theaters starting 6 Dec. 2019.
“In Fabric” will open in theaters everywhere in December.
courtesy A24
The Collegian: 14
Variety
23 September 2019
Events next week in Tulsa
Monday, Sept. 23 Ethan Veenker Editor-in-chief I’ve been writing for The Collegian since the second week of my freshman year, and the greatest portion of the dozens of stories I’ve written for this wonderful rag have been album reviews. I toyed with the idea of a column from my first time in the office but decided on just writing one — sometimes two — album reviews a week without relation to a column. The idea never resurfaced, even during my time as Variety Editor. Only now, with my executive power as Editor-in-Chief, am I forcing myself into a premade space within the Variety section. I’d like to discuss prominent albums from the past on or around the anniversaries of their release, specifically their importance to music and to me, in 500-ish words. This is Ethan’s Unnamed Music Column. I hope I can inspire you to listen. It’s been 15 years since Arcade Fire invented lots-of-people-yelling-for-the-chorus in indie rock and 20 years since American Football revealed that teenage emotions aren’t necessarily surface-deep. Sept. 14 was the 15th anniversary for Arcade Fire’s “Funeral” and the 20th for American Football’s self-titled debut, and the bands have been celebrating appropriately since then. Arcade Fire swamped their social media with old pictures, performances and snippets from the original “Funeral” tour (for example, their first tour bus was a repurposed school bus), and American Football released the “Year One Demos” EP, a collection of unreleased instrumental demos from the “American Football” sessions. The influence of these two records in their respective genres shouldn’t be understated. I’m not the first to argue that they aren’t unblemished masterpieces — “Haiti” is a notable lowpoint on “Funeral,” and “American Football” is admittedly frontloaded — but they’re still both fantastic albums. “Funeral” was the impetus for the sound and energy that indie rock would gradually come to embody before the entire genre peaked in 2009 (we’ve been witnessing its swansong in the decade since). Note the word there — “energy.” “Funeral,” despite its macabre title, is nothing if not energetic and packed with passion. Win Butler is certainly an odd duck of a frontman — his singing sounds uneven and tear-choked for the near entirety of “Funeral” — but he’s willing to let it rip vocally, and his roaring, untrained pining throughout the album recalls the vocal qualities of Jeff Mangum, a Merge Records colleague. I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t hear him calling “Where’d you go?” every time at the end of “Neighborhood #3 (Power Out).” The album is the result of half a dozen Canadian suburbs-dwellers finally unloosing their pent up creativity, and the scenes of the record wind in and out of lamplit houses, snowtrodden neighborhood streets and cozy car interiors. But despite the sleepy source material, the music elevates. Any track that begins with simple piano work ends with a flurry of fuzzy guitar. The emotional dam of “Crown of Love” breaks at the end, and “Rebellion (Lies)” is a constant rush of inertia. The pivotal “Wake Up” just has everyone yelling (though harmonically, and trendsettingly). “American Football” is another product of young people from nice neighborhoods, though tending a bit more rural (the famous house on the record’s cover confirms this), but frontman Mike Kinsella seems less interested in leaving that part of his life than Arcade Fire does. The record deals with the classic teenage relationship and breakup drama that comes from early emo output, but it balances it with tact and a mature, level-headed look back at the cusp of one’s coming of age. Above all: great instrumentation. The delightful, circular guitar riffs on the opener, “Never Meant,” speak to that. But if the first song is standing up, then the rest of the record is sitting, sometimes lying down. American Football took emo in a calmer, more downtempo direction in the wake of the burgeoning shoegaze and post-rock scenes. They don’t abandon the genre’s tropes — they undermine them. Guitar riffs give way to somber trumpet solos; Kinsella ridicules his own teenage emotions (on “Honestly”) just to later dredge them back up (“But the Regrets Are Killing Me”). It may be “sad boy hours” and you might be sick of seeing the picture of that house on the cover, but it’s earnest, and a striking release from a group of three Illinois nobodies who quite literally cobbled the record together last-minute and disbanded shortly after. Nothing about it signaled cohesion, yet here we are. What these two records are to me, most of all, are placeholders in my own musical history. Inspired by a joke from the film “High Fidelity,” I enjoy thinking about how I’d arrange my album collection in order of my discovering them, and the influence they’ve had on my life. These two records would be near the beginning of a period when I began making a concerted effort to develop my own taste, not informed by any of my family. That said, I don’t return to them frequently. I admit their faults, admire their triumphs and I love them, but I don’t spin them once a week. Even the bands have failed to inspire much interest from me since these releases — I recall writing a poor review of American Football’s second self-released record, the follow-up 17 years in the making, and though Arcade Fire has had “The Suburbs,” I mostly don’t jive with their post-”Funeral” sound. I haven’t even bothered to listen to the most recent release from either band, though I hear one is enjoyable and one is disappointing. These records are bigger than the bands that recorded them, in my opinion. There is something pure and creative and uncompromising about both of them. They’re full of life, ambition and a distinct lack of experience. As time goes on, I’m beginning to believe that last quality lends itself to the best music.
Circle Cinema screens “Brokelahoma,” a documentary about the effects of Oklahoma’s economy on public education. The film will be followed by an educational panel discussion. Starts at 7 p.m., $7.50 tickets with student ID
Tuesday, Sept. 24
Magic City Books is sponsoring a lecture by Sir Salman Rushdie for Banned Books Week. He will discuss his newest novel, “Quichotte.” Rushdie will speak at All Souls Unitarian Church, tickets are $33 online.
Thursday, Sept. 26
Reception for the release of “Modernism and the Law.” Dr. Robert Spoo, a professor in the College of Law, will discuss his book, which deals with the laws of literature. 7:00 p.m. in the College of Law, free to the public.
Friday, Sept. 27
Gilcrease After Hours: Mexican Modernism. Gilcrease will host regional Mexican dances, food, and music. Visitors will learn about Mexican culture with artist demos, activities and gallery talks coinciding with the exhibition “Mexican Modernism: Revolution and Reckoning.” Free to the public
courtesy Merge Records
courtesy Polyvinyl Record Co.
Circle Cinema screens “Robin Hood” for Silent Saturday Circle Cinema’s silent films are accompanied by organist Bill Rowland on the theater’s pipe organ. Justin Klopfer Student Writer Every second Saturday of the month, local independent theater Circle Cinema shows a classic silent film. This film is accompanied by live music played on a fully acoustic 1928 authentic pipe organ. It was originally played at Circle Cinema (though it was called Circle Theater then) from 1928 to the early ‘30s. The organ was removed in 1931 due to the rise of talkies. After having been in a music club into the 1960s, it was then stored away and never played. That is, until it was found about six years ago and was reinstalled in the cinema. The pipes producing the sound rest behind the giant screen in the first theater of Circle Cinema. September’s film was “Douglas Fairbanks in Robin Hood,” a 1922 swashbuckling ad-
After he comes back to England, he rounds up a gang of “Merry Men” and takes on the moniker of Robin Hood. With his new allies, including the king in disguise, he takes on the tyranny of the prince. This plot may seem basic, but the reason the movie holds up almost a century later is its giant sense of action and spectacle. An enormous castle set was created to film the movie, holding both bountiful feasts and intense brawls. Douglas Fairbanks dances around his enemies, outsmarting them and deftly navigating the stage. Despite being made in 1922, “Douglas Fairbank in Robin Hood” was already the seventh Robin Hood movie made. Since then, dozens of further film adaptations of the classic tale have been made. Many are bland schlock films designed to turn a quick buck. This film, however, radiates the energy that makes great silent films so endearing. It puts a smile on the viewer’s face and keeps them entertained in ways many modern movies simply can’t. It is a unique experience, and one that must be seen to be understood.
Rowland improvises it as he plays. He also must constantly glance at the movie itself to see what events he must time his playing to. The people of Tulsa seem to enjoy these events very much, as the theater was almost completely filled with enthusiastic guests of all ages. A steady stream of laughter accompanied the light-hearted adventure. Of
course, this popularity may also be a result of the movie’s generous ticket pricing: only five dollars. Overall, this unique experience is certainly worth attending at least once. October’s Saturday Silent will be “Battleship Potemkin” by Sergei Eisenstein, shown on the 12th.
“... accompanied by live music played on a fully acoustic 1928 authentic pipe organ.” venture directed by Allan Dwan. After King Richard (Wallace Beery) leaves England for the crusades, the conniving Prince John (Sam De Grace) usurps his throne. The Earl of Huntingdon (Douglas Fairbanks), gets word of this takeover and requests leave from the army to take back the kingdom.
All this brilliance being accompanied by beautiful live music made it all the more enjoyable. Skilled organist Bill Rowland operated the instrument throughout the film’s over two hour hour runtime. Even more impressive is the fact that the music is not entirely planned out in advance; rather,
Bill Rowland improvises accompaniment to the silent films on a pipe organ.
photo by Justin Klopfer
The State-Run Media
23 September 2019
The Collegian: 15
Area 51 raid: the “Naruto” rundown
graphic by Courtney Spivey
The military faithfully recreated the uniform of the memester troops.
Don’t rely on the fake news media, get the inside scoop on the Area 51 raid. Courtney Spivey Meme n00b Last Friday the internet community came together and held a march that will be written down in the history books. No, I’m not talking about the climate crisis one, that was kinda cool but really not worth much attention. What I’m referring to is the raid on Area 51. Humanity came together and congregated in the single most important secret base of the entire universe. To say that the world is now a better place is an understatement. The suicidal millenials that braved the fort and stood together in front of the base was an army of depression and memes in physical form. To say there was a chaotically sad energy in the crowd would be like saying that water is wet (although that is still up for debate).
However, the internet community could only pass around the little bits of humor the vloggers captured, and remain mostly ignorant of the absolute chaos that conspired … on the inside. I now wish to reveal my identity as a spy that went undercover at the base from the second the Facebook page went live till just now. Here’s what I found. June, 2019: The military was confused. July 4, 2019: The US navy seals were told to return from their stations and sent to Nevada the weekend before the raid. July 1 - Aug. 30th, 2019: The US Air Force deployed at least 500 planes from the time the Facebook event was created until the day before the raid commenced. From an inside source, it seemed they were leaving the base with living beings, and returning with tonnes of nuclear weaponry. July 12, 2019, approximately 1:23 p.m.: A new position opened up on the USgov.org page suspiciously called ‘Unpaid Intern,’ where the description stated that you were required to have formerly worked
at Buzzfeed. It did, however, include basic healthcare benefits. That position was filled within 25 minutes. Aug. 1, 2019: Generals were given topinformation concerning the nature of the creatures that existed in Area-51. Generals were then given a week to follow up with any questions about the beings that might have been unfamiliar to them, such as “anime-cat girls” (redirected to Elon Musk’s private phone number), “enslaved moisture” (water), and how if things went horribly wrong, the most successful (suicidal) millennial could leave with their own secret krabby patty formula. Aug. 1, 2019, later that evening: Recently employed members of the military were all required to create social media accounts. They then were tasked with creating memes to monitor the hype-level of all the users on the platform. Sept. 18, 2019, approximately around 11 p.m.: The recruits with the most karma / followers / retweets were given Naruto headbands and were deployed to Nevada the
day before the raid occurred. Sept. 19, 2019: Upon hearing that the hype had actually died out, the recruits decided to go ahead and just pretend to raid the base anyways. They were all military — there was no harm in a little bit of espionage. Sept. 20, 2019, 6:35 a.m.: The military proceeded to unsuccessfully attempt to raid the military base. Sept. 20, 2019, 7:04 a.m.: Only one real youtuber actually showed up and then proceeded to capture all the glory by Naruto running across America’s screens (and hearts) on Friday morning. As I risked my life to retrieve this information, I only have one more thing to add: They’re planning to keep this going — next year it might be to clean up the trash on the beaches, or the pentagon or the Real alien base. Stay tuned, fellow memesters. They are amongst us.
“Uncle” Joe Biden trapped in 2012 time loop Biden’s either a time lord or it’s time to send him to a home. Hannah Robbins Conspiracy theorist If you’ve watched the recent Democratic debates, you obviously have seen the mess of ridiculous liberals the Democrats have decided to field. Sure we all know about Mayor Pete (is he calling himself that because he wants to be homey and #relatable or because really no one can pronounce Buttigieg?), and the several candidates who speak Spanish regularly (but honestly they’re just pandering poorly with a memorized bit of Spanish, nothing more), but the real enigma of the primaries so far has been the liberal’s beloved “Uncle” Joe Biden. Biden’s performance in the debates hasn’t even been what liberals would call “A+ work” or even “good,” but he’s managed to make one thing clear: he was in the White House at the same time Obama was. Almost every policy Biden discusses harkens back to that awful time when the biggest drama surrounding U.S. politics was Obamacare and socialized medicine coming out of the White House. Actually, Biden discusses the years he was in office so much that it feels like he’s
graphic by Emma Palmer
Biden livin’ it up at his new retirement home.
talking about yesterday, and it’s becoming more and more clear he really thinks 2012 was five minutes ago. All of Biden’s stances are a photocopy of the Obama 2008 campaign. After Biden lost the nomination, he went on to vice-presidential debates. It’s obvious he thinks the crowded debates he took part in earlier this year were just the 2012 vice-presidential debates, and that some idiots fielded vice-presidential candidates for libertarians and the Green Party. In the most recent debate, Biden literally suggested that parents play record players before their kids go to bed. This is just another sign pointing to the fact that he’s lost control of what time he’s in. Suddenly his omission of unique policy proposals in fa-
vor of waxing poetic about Obama makes sense. He has to think that he must, because the dynamic duo is running together again! Biden’s sanity slippage make some of his gaffes make more sense. First off, Biden thought he was still vice president during the Parkland shooting in 2018. You know, two years into President Trump’s term? This only makes sense if it’s been one long slog in the White House from 2008 to now. Don’t forget that he also confused Mitt Romney and Donald Trump at a rally when talking about his opponent in the general election. How do you confuse them when one is literally from Mormon HQ, USA and the other one sure as hell doesn’t know any God I pray to? If Biden can’t even remem-
ber the year, how do you expect him to remember his opponent? Biden definitely thinks he’s in 2012, and thankfully it’s harming his campaign. While Biden might still have a “comfortable” lead, the debates continue to hit him hard, and Sanders and Warren are eating away at Biden’s lead. Does Biden have the staying power to keep up with these somehow less addled candidates? Nope! Especially since Biden looks older than Hillary did in 2016. Biden definitely didn’t win in 2008 and wasn’t on top of the ticket in 2012, so if he continues to summon Obama to give him the win because he believes it’s 2012, there will be some trouble in the future for “Uncle” Joe Biden.
Okla. schools in shambles after Hooters shuts down
Public schools are scrambling to teach sexual education in the wake of breasturant closings. Maddie Walters Anti-Woohoo Oklahoma’s hands have been forced in the recent decision to include sexual education in school curriculum. The decision came after all branches of popular restaurant chain, Hooters, were shut down in the state after violating state health codes. Oklahoma legislators were forced to sign a bill enacting sex education into all schools after the capitol received a barrage of messages from local, largely male, teenagers. The teenagers expressed their anger toward the closure of their favorite restaurant. They also expressed concern as to where incoming teenagers will learn about “the birds, bro,’’ as one such teen put in a plea on Twitter. We reached out to one such teen and received this response: “Man, this whole situation has rubbed me the wrong way. Hoot-
ers was my go-to after school hangout. Me and my bros would meet up there like every day. But you know what really sucks? Hooters was the only place I felt like I could actually hear about sex. Guess I’ll just have to go back to the internet now.” The eatery held a “Going Out with a Bang” party on Sept. 3, and we were able to secure a ticket. The party was tasteful and there wasn’t a dry eye in the house. The festivities ended with a giant cake being wheeled out, frosted with an owl saying,” We Had A Hoot,’ written in orange letters. We interviewed Candy, a waitress from the restaurant. Candy was extremely upset to hear that Hooters had been ordered to shut down. She wasn’t so upset for herself, but for all the loyal customers who frequented Hooters, saying, “Where will all the boys and girls go now?” The next nearest Hooters is approximately 118 miles away. The bill went through on Sept. 18. This bill states that, “all Oklahoma schools are required to teach a sexual education course. It is up to the school’s discretion as to how they teach the course. This also means that
school’s are in no way, shape or form required to discuss LGBTQ+ sex education.” The leniency of the bill has caused a whole new set of problems. Some schools have really taken the “discretion” bit of the bill too seriously. A local school has been reported as not allowing their teachers to say “sex” in the sex education class. Other schools have decided to take creative license of the bill, reportedly only teaching abstinence. The same school has even gone as far to show pictures of the effects of sexually transmitted infections. You may say what’s wrong with that? Well, they’ve been telling all their students that this happens whenever one has sex, regardless of their partner actually having an STI. We reached out to the school and received this statement: “We’d rather be safe than sorry. We value our students too much to take away their innocence in this way.” One of the proposers of this bill took to Facebook to defend the bill. “Look, we saw an issue and we fixed it. We know that as an education system, we’re failing the students of Oklahoma, but what more can we do?” He continued with,” Oh, if only the
local Hooters hadn’t shut down. I feel like that was a positive place for the youth of Oklahoma. Also, they had the best Onion Tanglers.” Some local teenagers have started an advocacy group to educate their fellow students since no one can seem to do it properly. The group has been met with criticism from adults in the community. A group of angry parents descended upon the group at their public forum for teenagers. One mother got up and shouted, “All of you kids are just looking for something to be offended about. There are NO problems with how the school is teaching … you know what’ education.” Lawmakers are still standing strong against the opposition of this bill. There have been numerous calls to revise the bill, but as one representative said, “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” Only time will tell how this situation will end. Meanwhile, how about driving the 118 miles to the next Hooters?
The State-Run Media
23 September 2019
the
State-Run media Have some fun before you die.
Anti-Vaxx, Pro-Zombie rally
White California moms stage protest to fight their fascist overlords. Michaela Bueche Deathly allergic to children
Career advice for a doomed generation We have what, maybe 30 years left? Your career decisions are obviously very important. Brennen Gray Aggravated Max Climate change, nuclear warfare and other apocalyptic what-not makes chances of future survival rather slim. But we are all going to be on the lookout for jobs pretty soon regardless, so here are some tips to help! 1. Embrace the futility: What was the best thing that was going to happen anyway? You would get a job out there somewhere, gain a few promotions, build your 401k and retire to a big empty house. Then die and be claimed by the void! I mean we all die at some point, either as corporate drones or as wasteland scavengers, so there was no winning anyway. Chalk up another one to the void! 2. Apply for a practical occupation: When the apocalypse comes around, it would grant you an extra few years of survival if you became a plumber or a car mechanic. If you want to go the plumber route and be a post-apocalyptic Mario, then I suggest this profession. Or you could go the Mad Max route and be a car mechanic. Of course, we are going to run out of oil in less than 50 years, but at least it would look cool. 3. Don’t apply for a job, play Fallout: Business … never changes. Those who are most prepared for the future will succeed in tomorrow’s world. So, drop the business major, cut the communications classes and forget your internships. Break out your preferred gaming system and practice exploring the wastelands of your favorite Ameri-
can city. Practice with your Pipboys and get ready your las rifles! 4. Avoid Coffee shops: This one is a real big-brain strategy for the job market in an uninhabitable earth. If people no longer are getting big-wig corporate jobs and are instead becoming plumbers and mechanics, then no one will buy $7 coffee every morning on their way to work. Secondly, everyone will drop out of college to pursue more practical, cost-efficient ways of life, so those 10-hours coffee shop study sessions will be eliminated as well. Whatever you do, DO NOT get into coffee. 5. Get into the alcohol industry: This one is pretty self-explanatory. Set up shop somewhere nice and post-WWI looking and fuel the manic partying as every post-WWI Ernest Hemingway and F. Scott Fitzgerald character comes to life! I know this is getting really dark really fast, but at least there will be romance in the apocalypse. 6. Apply for jobs in Alabama and D.C.: Nothing in life is certain but death, taxes and Alabama making it to the college football championships. The death part is already guaranteed given the circumstances, so after the upcoming ecological/economic/ nuclear apocalypse, go to one of these two places. These two shrines to America will be around forever. 7. Apply for your dream job: Whether you get it or not, you can always chuckle and tell yourself it’s not the end of the world. Life is short, and maybe when it comes to making career choices that will affect the rest of our lives, we should live like there is no tomorrow. So, follow your dreams, kids! Regardless of your chances of them panning out, and regardless of the stability of the future, chase your dreams to the ends of the earth.
Early Tuesday morning, hundreds of antivaxx parents materialized in the California State Capitol in protest of the recently proposed bill that would make the immunization of children mandatory. We were able to exclusively speak to several of these picketing parents. One such parent, Aimmee Khai-Leigh Smith, is a self proclaimed trophy wife and stay-at-home mom who gathered her Book ‘n’ Brunch Club to protest the new bill. Smith said, “Five years ago, my daughter died from smallpox. We took her body to a homeopathic doctor who was able to bring her back as a zombie. Now she’s better than ever! She never gets sick, but sometimes we have to take her to a chiropractor to reset her bones from, you know, the decay. Anyway, I can’t wait for the same thing to happen to my son!” Another member of the book club, Madeline Martha Mackenzie said, “I sacrificed my half-price mimosas and avocado toast at Sunny Side Up to be here protecting my children from these fascist overlords enforcing autism!” She then proceeded to take up 75 minutes of my busy schedule explaining how to get to Sunny Side Up. Another mom, Jessieighkah Aliviyah Newton-John, interrupted Mackenzie’s directions to give us her opinion.
Little Rebekka Jenkins with her “woke” mommy.
Newton-John said, “The Nazis are killing our kids with mercury! I don’t pay $100,000 a year to send my precious punkin to Saint Alphonsus Mary Antony John Cosmas Damian Michael Gaspard de’ Liguori the Patron Saint of Confessors Preparatory Academy just so Michelle Obama and her Nazi buddies running our country can poison them with mercury! And, another thing, if we keep giving pregnant women vaccines our future children will all get schizophrenia, and I’m not about to let that happen!” (These women were adamant that their full names be used.) Many of the protestors brought their zombified children with them. Others had signs with such phrases as “Nazis are killing our children” and “My zombie child is better than your autistic one.” Two hours into the rally, one of the zombie children got loose and attacked a police officer. Luckily, the other officers were prepared for this inevitable event and detained and isolated both the officer and the child in the governor’s office. We later found out that during this containment the governor had been cowering under his desk. Unfortunately, the zombie child and police officer were able to penetrate his defenses, and the governor is now a zombie. California has since been put under martial law until a new governor can be appointed and all the zombies can be head-shotted. With this news, I have decided to run for governor of California in complete support of anti-vaxxers and their zombie children. My first act as governor will be to make vaccines illegal, eliminate all medical doctors, and outlaw all meals besides brunch, a law punishable by death.
graphic by Emma Palmer
Unheard of: student only sleeps four hours
Student announces he only slept four hours last night, shocking his peers.
Emily Every Hasn’t slept since vampiric curse Local business student Cody Montgomery was sent to CSAS’s quiet room this morning for spiritual and physical healing after making the shocking announcement to his 9 a.m. intro to chemistry course that he only got four hours of sleep that night. Shocked by this wholly unique situation, his fellow students were all beyond excited, titulated and slightly horrified by Cody’s sleepless state. The story began when Cody walked into the lecture, looking slightly more dishev-
eled than normal. “What the fuck bro,” commented his Chem-1011 colleague Brody when Cody first appeared. “You look like hell,” Brody continued. The Monday morning class meeting had to be called off as the students disregarded the lecture on stoichiometry and instead lined up to hear Cody’s story. “I just was so interested by him not sleeping very well. It’s just almost unheard of,” one student remarked. She continued, “One time last semester, this guy Kevin only got three hours of sleep. No one’s seen him since, though there are rumors that he’s been taken in by the government for, like, experimentation or something.” Brody, a pre-med student in Cody’s chemistry course, worried about the neurological development of Cody’s brain: “Sleep’s, like, essential. I can’t even imagine not getting
my nightly nine. Like, he’s gonna be so messed up. I can’t imagine what made him stay up that late.” On the topic of his peers’ total and complete shock, Cody stated, “I know it’s weird. Like, who gets fewer than nine hours a night? Haha. I’m like completely crazy. Totally uncontrollable. Like, I’ll do anything, haha.” Cody preceded to point to a fence outside of Keplinger Hall and ask if I wanted him to jump it: “I’ll do it haha. I’ll do it. I’m like that! I’m a twisted fucking cycle path.” Reaching out to his parents for a statement, the Montgomery family was disturbed by the unhealthy state that the university forced their son into. “We hold the university and its staff fully responsible for the actions of our son,” said Dr. Richard Montgomery. “My great-
grandfather didn’t fight and lose in this nation’s Civil War for my beautiful baby son to be treated like a pack-mule, absolutely bombarded with homework atop his already extensive extracurricular schedule. He plays sports, you know? I’m just so ashamed that my baby basketball boy was so abused.” Braylen, whom Cody had hung out with during the night in question, reports that Cody and he were studying for an upcoming exam, though his YouTube history from the night is littered with “TikToks that radiate vine energy” compilations. Cody’s on close watch following his stunt, and CSAS will be monitoring him and his health closely.