22 April 2013 Issue of the Collegian

a student newspaper of the university of tulsa

april 22, 2013 issue 24 ~ volume 98

g n i r e b m e m Re the The Tulsa Race Riot dealt a crippling blow to the residents of the black Greenwood District. The Greenwood District, referred to by such derogatory names as “Little Africa” by the Tulsa Tribune, faced machine gun fire, arson and even aerial bombings from a white mob (top). The residents were forced from their homes and held in the Convention Hall, now the Brady Theater (bottom-left). The Riot, which investigators estimate resulted in $300 million worth of damage in today’s currency, “devastated the Greenwood District” (bottom-right).

Eighty-two years ago, the black Greenwood District was destroyed and its citizens held captive by their white neighbors in what would become known as the “Tulsa Race Riot.”

John Lepine Student Writer

North of downtown Tulsa, just beyond the Frisco railroad tracks, two side-by-side neighborhoods radiate youthful vitality, engaged in what resembles a healthy sibling rivalry of development and expansion.

The Brady Arts District is the longtime home to Tulsa landmarks like Cain’s Ballroom and the Brady Theater. Last fall it opened the Guthrie Green, a public park used for everything from concerts to markets to yoga classes, and the Henry Zarrow Center, an art gallery, studio space and community classroom site supported by TU. Go east from the Brady District.

When you cross Martin Luther King, Jr. Boulevard, you are in Greenwood, and you’ll see a similar boom in development.

Drillers baseball just opened its fourth season at ONEOK Field, and the John Hope Franklin Reconciliation Park was dedicated in 2011. There is a large apartment complex rising at the corner of Greenwood and Archer, and the popular Fat Guy’s Burger Bar is just down the street from there.

But these siblings districts were not always friendly partners in the revitalization of North Tulsa. The Brady District boasts old and historic attractions that Greenwood

lacks, because Greenwood was burned down in the 1920s, economically gutted in the ‘60s, and cut in half with a highway in the ‘70s.

In fact, the “old lady on Brady”—Brady Theater, the former city convention hall—was used as a concentration camp for Greenwood residents on a fateful night some 92 years ago.

In 1921, Greenwood was “the Black Wall Street.” It published two newspapers and was home to

in 1920.

The Klan followed a blackrobed group called the Knights of Liberty that dispensed vigilante justice in Tulsa during World War I, including the “Tulsa Outrage,” in which some 30 union members who opposed the war effort were whipped, tarred and feathered.

Brady was a participant in the Outrage.

In the midst of this climate of lawless “justice,” Roy Belton, a white man accused of an August

“(The Riot) wiped out personal fortunes and created an economic vacuum in the destroyed community.” a dozen churches, scores of shops and some of the most successful black businessmen and professionals anywhere in the United States.

Jim Crow laws relegated blacks to their own neighborhood on the fringe of downtown, but segregation had the side-effect of building an economically powerful community that was a source of pride to the African-Americans who called Tulsa home.

It was also a source of gall to envious poor whites and rich city leaders who wanted to expand into Greenwood and push blacks northward.

Racial tensions were high in the early summer of 1921. The largest ever Sons of Confederate Veterans convention had come to Tulsa in 1918, due largely to the efforts of W. Tate Brady, one of Tulsa’s founding fathers. The Ku Klux Klan formed an Oklahoma chapter, of which Brady was a member,

1920 hijacking and murder, was seized from prison and lynched in Jenks by a mob. The Tulsa Tribune and Tulsa World published approving editorials. No one was indicted.

And then, on May 31, a black man named Dick Rowland got on an elevator with a white elevator

Riot

Courtesy of McFarlin Special Collections, Graphic by Jill Graves

That afternoon the sensationalist Tulsa Tribune, which called Greenwood “Little Africa” and even less polite names, reported on the incident with an article entitled “Nab Negro for Attacking Girl in Elevator.”

According to a 2001 report put out by commission of the Oklahoma legislature, there are numerous accounts by blacks and whites of an editorial called “To Lynch Negro Tonight” in that same paper.

No extant copies of the May 31 Tribune remain. The microfilm of the front page and editorial page for that day have been destroyed.

But by sundown, the Tribune editorial had had its effect. Hundreds of armed whites surrounded the courthouse where Rowland was under the protection of a newly elected sheriff and his deputies.

Scores of blacks from Greenwood arrived to offer their assistance in protecting the accused, which the sheriff refused.

Then, in the standoff outside the courthouse, someone fired a stray shot, and the Tulsa Race Riot of 1921 began.

“A machine gun was set up on Stovepipe Hill

overlooking Greenwood. Cars of armed whites drove

through the streets, forcing people from their houses.” operator named Sarah Page. Maybe he fell and grabbed her. Maybe they knew each other and had a lovers’ quarrel.

Rowland was later declared not guilty by a jury, but on that elevator that day Sarah Page screamed and Rowland was taken into custody for assault.

“The Riot devastated the Greenwood District,” said Frances Jordan-Rakestraw, Executive Director of the Greenwood Cultural Center. “It wiped out personal fortunes and created a temporary economic vacuum in the destroyed community.”

According to the 2001 Commis-

sion to Study the Tulsa Race Riot, a conservative estimate for the cost of damages done (in 1921 dollars) is $1.5 million. In today’s dollars, estimates for the economic cost of the Riot to Greenwood range as high as $300 million, and all that in a single night.

In some sense, it is a misnomer to call it a riot. After shots were exchanged at the courthouse, the outnumbered residents of Greenwood returned to their neighborhood.

The lynch mob, unable to get at its well-guarded target, decided to string up a populace instead.

Around daybreak on June 1, the city whistle blew, a signal for the white “home guards” to advance on the neighborhood they had surrounded. A machine gun was set up on Stovepipe Hill overlooking Greenwood. Cars of armed whites drove through the streets, forcing people from their houses. Fires were lit in black houses and business. “(I) saw white guards (Home Guards) break into stores of all kinds and carry out the contents that were being loaded onto trucks, then hastened toward the white district of the city,” wrote M.D. Russell in a letter recounting his memories as a Greenwood resident.

J.C. Latimer, a Greenwood architect, recorded similar occurrences: “I could see men and boys swarming around the colored people’s homes, while other looted and burned the homes of my people.” “(A)eroplanes began to fly over us, in some instances very low to the ground,” wrote Riot survivor R.T. Bridgewater. Bridgewater

See Riot page 5

Sports

22 April 2013

the Collegian : 2

Unicycle hockey and bandy: actual sports Bandy and unicycle hockey are little-known sports with a growing presence in Europe, each with elements comparable to ice hockey.

Will Bramlett Student writer

Logan Miller / Collegian

Hurricane cheerleaders on the sideline, including seniors Chad Watson (left) and Kasee Patterson (center), spur on the crowd at the September football game against Tulane.

Hurricane Spirit Squad embodies athleticism Do the athleticism, teamwork, time commitment and dedication demanded of cheerleaders qualify cheer as a sport?

Amanda Schenk Student writer

The role of cheerleading in athletics has for years been subject to debate. Some cite the commitment and athleticism of cheerleading in their argument that it is a sport, while others cannot imagine a ‘sport’ including cheerleading’s less traditional athleticism.

The University of Tulsa’s Spirit Squad consists of a co-ed cheerleading team, the pom squad, and mascot Captain Cane. Expectations of the Spirit Squad do not stop with involvement on game day. The squad practices at least three times weekly, and additional fitness training is also required a minimum of three times each week.

The Spirit Squad is officially considered a part of the TU Athletic Department and is required

to adhere to NCAA academic requirements like every other Hurricane team. Each member of the squad must have a minimum grade point average of 2.0, and be enrolled in at least 12 credits. Spirit Squad members also attend study hall with other student-athletes at the Case Athletic Complex.

When asked how she would define a sport, cheerleading team

ing requires a specific set of skills; there is a great deal of technique, proprioception, training, communication, and strength required to execute these skills. Therefore it should come as no surprise that my reaction to someone saying it is not a sport is to be offended and somewhat hurt due to their lack of understanding of all the work we do.”

While browsing the Internet, two sports caught my eye because of their similarity to my favorite sport, ice hockey. These sports, which are both nearly a century old, are bandy and unicycle hockey.

Bandy is a popular sport in Scandinavian countries and Russia, with world championships played since 1957. One rink the United States hosted the men’s

a blue card. Should a player receive three blue cards, he or she is out for the remainder of the game.

At this year’s Bandy World Championship game, Russia defeated Sweden 4–3. Over 40,000 people attended the game.

The second sport, unicycle hockey, is sanctioned by the International Unicycling Federation in chapter 8 of the IUF’s official rulebook. The game of unicycle hockey is exactly what it sounds like—a group of people playing hockey while riding unicycles.

Germany, Switzerland and the United Kingdom all have unicycle hockey leagues. In fact, the German league boasts 53 teams.

Games are usually played on a basketball court in a gym. Each team has five players with no des-

“Unicycle hockey is exactly what it sounds like—people playing hockey while riding unicycles” world bandy championship in 1995 and the women’s world championship in 2006.

The best way to describe bandy is as a mixture of soccer, ice hock-

ignated goalie. To play the ball, a player must be on their unicycle seat with both feet on the pedals.

The goal, of course, is to get the ball into the back of the net. The

“I have so much love for what I do, and no label—athlete or non-athlete—can change that.” co-captain Kayla Baney said, “I would define a sport as a physical activity that incorporates many different aspects of athletics. It incorporates mental and physical strength, knowledge, skill and a commitment to your team and community.”

By this definition, it is understandable when cheerleaders become frustrated with dismissive people. Baney added, “Cheerlead-

While Hurricane cheerleaders do not compete in cheerleading competitions, their involvement is similar to that of other teams. Additionally, cheerleaders say, their sense of team camaraderie is no less than any other sports team.

Junior cheerleader Cheyann Weinacht said, “I have so much love for my teammates and what I do, and no label—athlete or non-athlete— can change that.”

Color Run Tulsa hosts brilliant 5k Photo courtesy Watchmeeat

Players compete in unicycle hockey on the streets of Brooklyn as part of New York City’s Unifest in August 2012.

Will Bramlett / Collegian

Starting at 9 a.m. on Saturday, Color Run Tulsa hosted a five-kilometer race in which white-shirted participants of all ages and levels of athleticism passed through clouds of powder paint as they progressed toward the finish line.

ey and field hockey. The playing surface is the size of a soccer field and covered with ice. Eleven players, including a goalie, comprise a team. Games last for two 45-minute halves, during which helmeted players on skates shoot a ball at the goalie using a field-hockeystyle stick.

The goalie has pads similar to those of a field hockey goalie and the offsides penalty is the same as in soccer. Time is also kept by the official on the ice and continues if the ball leaves field of play. Just as in hockey, scoring requires the ball to reach the back of the net.

Unlike ice hockey, bandy is a non-contact sport. Rather than yellow and red cards or a few minutes in the penalty box, a player is awarded a ten-minute penalty with

ball can either be a dead tennis ball or a street hockey ball.

Like bandy and unlike ice hockey, unicycle hockey is a noncontact sport. The only contact allowed is between sticks in the vicinity of the ball. Fouls can lead to a free shot and a 6.5 m, the equivalent of a corner kick and a penalty shot, or a penalty goal, a free goal or a trip to the penalty box.

These are sports which have taken off in Europe and are expanding around the globe. They may seem strange, but have been around for a while, and combine the things which make other sports popular into their own unique game.

So, does anyone know how to unicycle?

the Collegian : 3

Sam Morton Student Writer

Hello Bleacher Creature faithful! With the NBA postseason upon us, here are my surefire, can’t lose, take-it-to-Vegas predictions for every series through the finals.

First Round #1 OKC Thunder vs. #8 Houston Rockets Former fan-favorite James Harden will have plenty of time to work on his beard in the offseason. The Thunder take this one in five. #4 LA Clippers vs. #5 Memphis Grizzlies The pure athleticism of Chris Paul, Blake Griffin and DeAndre Jordan gets outlasted by the Grizzlies inside duo of Zach Randolph and Marc Gasol. The Griz pull it out in seven. #2 San Antonio Spurs vs. #7 LA Lakers The Kobe-less Lakers don’t stand a chance in this one. Steve Blake played almost 40 minutes in the first game of this series. That is one ugly statistic. Spurs in four. #3 Denver Nuggets vs. #6 Golden State Warriors Depth is key in this one. David Lee went down for the Warriors in game one, leaving the Warriors thin on options. Meanwhile the Nuggets have one of the deepest benches in the league. Nuggets win in six. #1 Miami Heat vs. #8 Milwaukee Bucks This one won’t be close. Heat in four. #4 Brooklyn Nets vs. #5 Chicago Bulls The Bulls fight the good fight but just aren’t the same team without Derrick Rose.

Nets win in seven. #2 New York Knicks vs. #7 Boston Celtics The Celtics would love to give the city of Boston something to cheer for right now, but an aging squad without Rajon Rondo just isn’t up to the task. Knicks take the series in five. #3 Indiana Pacers vs. #6 Atlanta Hawks Big man combo of Paul George and David West proves to be too much for the Hawks. Pacers in five.

Second Round #1 Thunder vs. #5 Grizzlies The Grizzlies’ sedentary style of play will be no match for the run-and-gun style of the Thunder. Thunder take it in five. #2 San Antonio Spurs vs. #3 Denver Nuggets This will be the series that the Spurs finally show their age. Nuggets outlast the Spurs in a tough seven-game series. #1 Miami Heat vs. #4 Brooklyn Nets Miami breezes through another series.

The Nets might snag one at home, but the Heat win in five. #2 New York Knicks vs. #3 Indiana Pacers There are times where Carmello Anthony looks downright unstoppable. Knicks take it to the Pacers in six.

Third Round #1 OKC Thunder vs. #3 Denver Nuggets This will be a fun series to watch as both teams like to run the floor. I wouldn’t be surprised if both teams scored over 100 in every game. If it’s a running match though, nobody does it better than Westbrook and the Thunder. OKC takes it in six. #1 Miami Heat vs. #2 New York Knicks The Knicks make it farther than they have in recent memory, but there is simply not enough defense on this team to slow down King James. Heat win in five.

NBA Championship #1 Thunder vs. #1 Heat A rematch of last year’s final, this series will be a brawl. It ends up coming down to some late-game-7 heroics from Kevin Durant and the Thunder take home the franchise’s first championship title. Thunder win the championship in seven.

Sports

Tulsa dominates C-USA With more Conference USA championships than any other C-USA member, TU is likely to fare extremely well against its future opponents in the American Athletic Conference.

John Lepine

Student Writer

TU’s time in the C-USA, with one season remaining before a jump to the fledgling American Athletic Conference, has not just been victorious—it has been utterly dominant. After nearly eight years in the league, the numbers don’t lie.

Since joining Conference USA in 2005, the University of Tulsa has won 49 conference championships. No other school has won half as many in that amount of time.

SMU, in second place, has won 23.

Since joining C-USA in 2005, there has never been a year that TU hasn’t won multiple postseason conference championships.

No other school can claim that distinction.

Tulsa has also won conference championships in 11 of the 18 sports it competes in. So far this year, TU has ended as champions or runners-up in nine of ten sports, remaining in strong contention to win multiple spring sport titles.

As hard as it is to imagine, TU’s success could even increase next year in what will be a greatly watered-down C-USA. Tulsa has lost to just four schools in conference tournaments this year—to SMU, Memphis, UCF and Houston.

Every team that edged out the Golden Hurricane is leaving for the AAC this summer, and their replacements are mostly surfacing from conferences like the inferior Sun Belt and the crumbling Western Athletic Conference.

Tulsa’s success is notable not just because it is unparalleled in the C-USA. It is notable because Tulsa, with only 3,160 undergrads, is the smallest school in the entire country that competes at the FBS level of NCAA athletics.

It is notable because Tulsa student-athletes regularly achieve at the highest levels academically. TU is the current holder of C-USA’s Institutional Excellence Award for having the highest average GPA among student-athletes.

Last week, 61 Golden Hurricane players won Academic Medals for having cumulative GPAs of 3.75 or higher—the most winners, from the smallest school in the conference, for three years in a row. TU’s success is notable because it has stayed consistent throughout institutional change, even upheaval. In the past two and a half years, TU has hired new head coaches in men’s and women’s basketball and football, two new athletic directors, and a new president followed shortly by an old new president.

During all this, the Golden Hurricane program has achieved academically, athletically, and ethically—with recent acquittal of wrongdoing by the NCAA and coverage in the Tulsa World for the character instilled

by Coach Blankenship into the football program.

Tulsa’s time in the C-USA has coincided with one of the brightest eras in TU athletic history, and the Golden Hurricane is only getting stronger. But as the C-USA already knows and the AAC will soon find out, when a Hurricane is approaching there’s only one safe place to be—right here, in the eye of the storm.

TU soccer to succeed in AAC

Tulsa’s soccer program has thrived in the C-USA, and is expected to have continued success in its newly forming conference.

Jake Dodson Student writer

TU’s strong football program and historically rich basketball program have been given much credit for Tulsa’s invitation into the American Athletic Conference (as the former Big East will be known), but perhaps underappreciated has been TU’s men’s soccer program, which has been a national force for many years under Head Coach Tom McIntosh.

TU men’s soccer will face a new set of challenges when it moves to the AAC in July 2014. In addition to continuing rivalries with former Conference USA foes Southern Methodist University and the University of Central Florida, Tulsa will have to face the likes of Connecticut, which finished the 2012 season ranked No. 6 in the NCAA, and South Florida, in and out of the

22 April 2013

top 25 in 2012.

However, Tulsa’s history and roster may qualify it not only to be strongly competitive in the new conference, but to be an immediate title contender. Tulsa had a highly successful campaign in 2012, earning 14 victories and outscoring opponents 48–23 in the season.

No. 11 Tulsa also advanced to the Sweet Sixteen of the NCAA tournament in 2012, leaving only after losing a heartbreaking match (2–1) to No. 12 San Diego.

Tulsa will be led in 2013 by forward Cristian Mata, who was selected to be a part of Soccer America’s 2012 all-freshman team.

A true freshman, Mata had a team-best 14 goals, including five game-winners and six assists.

He ranked 13th in the nation in goals per game with .7 a match. His performance in Tulsa’s last season in the C-USA will be a strong indicator of the Golden Hurricane’s prospects in the AAC. With another strong recruiting class coming in, and other experienced players returning, the Golden Hurricane is set to be an title contender when it enters the AAC in 2014.

Photo courtesy Kristie Kay Lacy

Hurricane fan J. Christopher Proctor splashes through the Genave King Rogers Fountain Plaza during the university’s annual Polar Bear Run to show his support for the University of Tulsa.

A treatise on sports A few weeks ago I was asked by a friend why people allow themselves to become so emotionally invested in sports. As a former sports writer and editor, and a longtime college football fan, I composed this article as my answer.

J. Christopher Proctor

Foreign correspondent

It presumably didn’t take long for the first men to see rocks and then wonder who could run to them fastest or throw them furthest. From there, rules and traditions quickly solidified and full-fledged sports developed.

While interesting, this is not necessarily

has mostly vanished from the modern civilized world. So, now that we can’t mercilessly kill and plunder to show our greatness, how can we simulate this sensation?

You guessed it: sports.

How better to prove to all who care that the University of Tulsa is better than the University of Houston than to send our boys down I–45 and beat the Cougars 41–7 on their home field? The game changed nothing for anyone in the stands, and did nothing to validate the academic superiority of one institution over the other. But, on a fair field, with pre-agreed upon rules, our side was able to outperform their side, and thousands of people—myself included—legitimately cared about this.

It is no coincidence that every spectator sports team has a constituency. A city, a school, a state, a nationality: some group which the team theoretically represents.

This allows average non-athletes like you and I to feel that in some way we are involved in the match alongside the players on the field. Once sports teams started to represent larger groups, it wasn’t difficult

“Now that we can’t mercilessly kill and plunder to show our greatness, how can we simulate this sensation?” pertinent to the question at hand. It is easy to understand the emotional ties for the guy involved in the race, as he has a direct stake in the outcome. But what about the guy watching the race, with absolutely no material stake in the affair? Why is he there?

Why does he even care?

This is the question at hand. I have two potential, likely interrelated, answers.

We are the champions First, I think there is some form of vague tribalism present in modern mankind’s emotional investment in sports. Earlier in our history, if one group wanted to prove it was superior to another it would brandish its weapons and attack.

Luckily, this type of internecine warfare

for man’s tribal instincts from an era long past to come shining through.

People seem to have an urge to be a part of something larger than themselves, and sports give us a way to act on this urge—investing in a particular in-group while simultaneously competing with all out-groups that challenge our team’s supremacy. Football fields have replaced battlefields but the idea is largely the same.

Cody Green take the wheel Time is expiring. Your team is down. The game—and even the season—is on the line.

One play is the difference between victory and defeat. And you are standing twenty

See Treatise page 9

A division above: does Tulsa belong?

As the smallest NCAA Division I school, even with its unprecedented success, the University of Tulsa faces challenges that many members of the Golden Hurricane may be tempted to take for granted.

Nick Lewellen

Student Writer

Recently, I was talking with a professor, whom I have known since I was a freshman.

When we meet to discuss a project or class, we end up discussing our lives, what we are reading, or how good TV has gotten.

Our conversation, as it often does, eventually drifted to sports, and then to TU’s move to the American Athletic Conference.

I mentioned some of the struggles TU would face in a new conference, and this professor responded with an opinion that I had often considered but never said out loud. “The real problem is, TU has no business being in Division I sports,” he said bluntly.

Honestly, I was a bit shocked. It felt like blasphemy. Sure, maybe I had a few similar thoughts once before, but I would have never voiced them, especially not to another

member of the TU family. Also, I don’t really feel comfortable complaining about a system that has given me access to the highest level of sports at no personal cost beyond tuition.

But the more I thought about it, the more I saw it wasn’t really a complaint. It was just a fact.

Every TU sports fan knows that we have the smallest enrollment of any Football Bowl Subdivision (FBS) university in the country. There are a few other schools close to us in terms of enrollment, but only a few, and, if endowment figures are any indication, these schools have access to more funding than TU does.

These hard truths make it nearly impossible for us to generate a profitable athletics program. In fact, TU’s athletic program probably does generate some costs for students, either financial or otherwise.

The point is clear to me, at least in football, that TU doesn’t really belong in Division I, but I’m glad we are here regardless.

For a program that doesn’t belong, we have exceeded everyone’s expectations. TU has been to eight bowl games in the last 10 seasons, and is the favorite to win the Conference USA title again next year.

For all of TU’s academic accomplishments, our athletic accomplishments may be even greater. Yes, TU is too small to compete in the FBS, but that doesn’t stop the Hurricane from winning consistently.

NEWS

22 april 2013

the Collegian : 4

TU professor to run in solidarity with bombing victims

A TU alumnus and a faculty member express horror at the bombings, pride for those who helped the victims.

Oscar Ho Staff Writer

Last Monday, the city of Boston was shaken by two explosions near the finish line of the annual Boston Marathon on Boylston Street. Three people died in the blasts and nearly 200 were injured.

Two brothers of Chechen ethnicity, Tamerlan and Dzhokar Tsarnaev, are alleged to be responsible for the bombings. At press time, Dzhokar was in the intensive-care unit of Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center in Boston. His brother was killed in a firefight with Boston police during a manhunt on April 18.

Dr. Gordon Purser, the famously athletic chemistry professor at TU, takes comfort that no one from the TU community is known to be a victim or witness to the blasts.

Purser, an enthusiastic runner, never seriously intended to run the Boston Marathon, citing the low qualification time and the large amount of effort needed to attend.

“But next year I really do (want to run),” he said, “to be as defiant as possible.”

Purser was shaken by the news. Had Purser run Boston this year, he predicted his time would have been 4 hours, 16 minutes.

The bombs exploded at 4 hours, 9 minutes.

He thought of the horrifying possibility: “My family would have been there,” at the time of the explosion, he said.

Kate Kramer, a former Collegian Editorin-Chief, lives in Boston. While she was not witness to the bombings and does not know any TU alumni who were there, she offered to relate her story.

Kramer said that being in Boston at the time of the bombing was like being an extra “in a bad action-thriller film,” someone with lots of questions when the only answers come in the form of “sirens screaming down the street.”

The Boston cell phone network was all but overrun Monday, Kramer said, making it difficult to find out “whether our families and friends were safe and reassure them or our safety.”

Despite the uncertainty and the fear, Kramer remains “proud” of Boston, whose people “had the good sense to support each other this week.”

Kramer singled out Boston “police, firefighters, emergency medical services and ordinary people” who did everything that they could to “help those who were harmed in the explosions.”

Kramer noted that the “student medical volunteers,” who initially thought they would spend their day helping exhausted runners, “found themselves applying bandages, giving comfort, and helping frantic people contact their families.”

And for those trapped in and around Copley Square and Boylston street, “the people of Boston opened their doors wide to share food, water, and landline phone service” with those who needed them, Kramer said.

Upon the capture of Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, Kramer could only express relief. “I feel a tremendous sense of relief, a tangible relaxing of tension from the city around me,” she said.

Like many others, Kramer now wants answers. “I would love to hear Dzhokhar Tsarnaev’s story and find out what influenced him to act in this way.” After Boston’s week of horror, Kramer and the residents of Boston are eager to begin the healing process.

Courtesy of Fast Company

An explosion at the Boston Marathon killed three on Monday. Chechen brothers Tamerlan and Dzhokar Tsarnaev are suspects. The former has been killed in a firefight and the latter taken alive by the FBI.

Heartland Gaming Expo to bring together OK students Schools from across the state will come to TU to show off their talents in game design and coding.

Steven Buchele Student Writer

The Heartland Gaming Expo, an opportunity for students from across the state of Oklahoma to showcase their achievements in game design and creation, will come to the University of Tulsa’s Allen Chapman Activity Center Friday through Sunday.

The Expo is being organized by the College of Arts and Sciences and the College of Engineering and Natural Sciences to “promote gaming and gaming work in TU, Tulsa and Oklahoma at large,” according to Dr. Roger Mailler, computer science professor and general chair of the Expo.

This “student centered event” will “allow students to showcase their work involving video games,” Mailler said.

The student work on display will include concept art, scores and conceptual designs in addition to fully realized video games made by college students.

TU students, however, will not be the only ones exhibiting at the Expo. State schools including Oklahoma City Community College, Southwestern and Northwestern Oklahoma State Universities and Oklahoma Panhandle State University will be traveling to Tulsa to show off their work.

The Expo isn’t just for computer scientists and gamers. “This is really a campuswide event,” Mailler said. “People from the English department, computer science, art and many others have been involved in making this.”

There will be four main events at the Heartland Gaming Expo. The core of the Expo is the game showcase, which is “designed to recognize and reward teams that have worked hard to produce games that enrich our lives by challenging and entertaining us,” according to the Heartland Gaming Expo’s website. Games in the showcase should span many different genres and platforms.

For those that don’t feel up to the showcase, there will be a gallery show, “which focuses more on works-in-progress.” In the

Lambda Chi Alpha is having their philanthropy dinner Monday April 22 from 5 to 7 at their house

Gallery Show one will find conceptual artwork, animations, scores and conceptual designs for possible games.

Mailler said this part of the Expo should appeal to those who enjoy video games more for their art and concepts than for their gameplay.

The third section of the Expo is a “zerohour gaming competition.” “Zero-hour will basically be they show up and play a game—a game that they have never played before—for 30 minutes to see who can get the highest score,” Mailler said.

The chance for bragging rights in the zero-hour gaming competition will only be open to people who are part of a team competing in at least one of the other three parts of the Expo.

The final portion is the “hackathon” hosted by the university’s chapter of the Association of Computing Machinery (ACM), where teams of two to four will have 18 hours to make a functioning game based off a theme given to them at the beginning of the competition.

Eric Kuxhausen, president of the TU ACM, described the hackathon as an opportunity for Oklahoma students “to show off their skills, or to test their skills” at designing a game under pressure.

All entries to the Expo will be judged by a panel including both professors and “in-

dustry veterans,” according to Kuxhausen.

The Expo hopes to showcase skills taken from a range of disciplines much wider than simply programming. The board of chairs includes representatives from the English, art, music, film and communications departments.

“Game creation and play, when done right, can involve worlds of design, character and narratology, music and art creation and criticism, play philosophy, problem solving, and of course marathon-length sprints of collaborative programming teamwork,” said Ben Peters, communications professor and expo co-chair.

“There’s really no particular game or portion that I am really looking forward to,” Mailler said. “What will be great is seeing everybody in the crowd and the excitement (of) the students showing off their work.”

The Expo is hoping to bring sizable crowds for this first year, because the organization committee has big plans for future years.

“I hope that this year will set us on a pathway for growth,” Mailler said, noting that a successful first Expo might lead to more sponsorships and the opportunity to have game company booths show up in future years.

“We want this to become a true gaming event that the whole country can look to,”

Mailler said.

For more information or to register for one of the events (registration closes April 24) game enthusiasts and designers can visit heartlandgamingexpo.com.

“I hope everybody takes some time off from studying to drop by and have a good time supporting the people who are in participation,” Mailler said. “It is going to be a stress-relieving zone.”

Courtesy of KunWoo Dodd

Blake Burkhart works on his video game at last semester’s hackathon, an overnight programming contest for teams of two to four. The hackathon will be one of four events composing this year’s Heartland Gaming Expo.

VP Sorochty to retire at end of semester

Roger Sorochty, vice president for enrollment and student affairs for 12 years, will end a long career of university administration.

Beate Hall Staff Writer

After 12 years at the University of Tulsa, Dr. Roger W. Sorochty, the vice president for enrollment and student services, will retire this spring.

Before TU, Sorochty worked at St. Bonaventure University; Eckerd College in St. Petersburg, Florida; Newman University in Wichita, Kansas; Kent State in Kent, Ohio and the State University of New York at Potsdam.

He received his Ph.D. in educational administration at the University of Ottawa, his master’s degree at Syracuse University and his bachelor’s degree at Hobart College.

Over the last 12 years, Dr. Sorochty has contributed much to the university through

Lambda Chi Alpha will be going to the food bank on the April 24 Chi Omega is having Field of Wishes on April 26 Courtesy of University of Tulsa

During his time as vice president of student affairs and admission, Roger Sorochty revived Phi Eta Sigma, reinvigorated admissions efforts and helped transition TU from a commuter school to a residential campus.

advising, planning and changes to TU’s dining options.

“Broadly speaking, the significant transformation to being a residential campus with a wide array of dining options as a result of the efforts of many, many others,” said Sorochty. “So many wonderful things have happened over the last twelve years.”

He is also responsible for the reactivation of Phi Eta Sigma, the freshman honor society, the Secondary School Teacher Prize for Inspiration and undergraduate admission efforts that have enhanced the quality of the student body.

Sorochty has worked closely with the Student Association administration, helping develop the Student Commitment and Pledge with the SA administration in 2002 and 2003, and open the new commuter lounge in ACAC this academic year.

Senior Rick Shipley, who serves as the chief of staff for SA, said, “Dr. Sorochty’s experience makes him an invaluable resource to the University of Tulsa.

“His insights help Student Association not only with event planning but also with guidance for Senate resolutions.”

Shipley, who was also part of the planning team, spoke of Sorochty’s valuable contributions to the planning process. “For example, when considering the new Commuter Lounge, Dr. Sorochty pointed out shortcomings with previous lounges that had been closed,” Shipley said.

After he leaves the university on June 28, which happens to be his 44th wedding anniversary to his wife Barbara, Sorochty will be moving to Indian Rocks Beach, Florida.

The Sorochtys first lived in Florida when he worked at Eckerd College. His daughters will still be living in the Midwest, in Wichita and Jenks, Okla., so he will be traveling back to Oklahoma to visit family.

“We plan many trips back here and being less than 90 minutes from Walt Disney World we hope they’ll plan trips to Florida too,” Sorochty said.

The Sorochtys are also planning a river cruise through France and Germany.

Sorochty still has many projects ahead.

“I’m taking the advice of many and plan to remain professionally active in retirement but at a different pace,” he said.

Sorochty will be one of three authors for an upcoming book about higher education that will address risk management from a student affairs perspective.

He will also continue to peer review and conduct accreditation visits for the Higher Learning Commission.

Sorochty also plans to return to one of his initiatives at Eckerd College.

“My primary responsibility will be to acquaint colleges and universities with the Conflict Dynamics Profile for use with their professional staff and student leaders” Sorochty said.

“The CDP is designed to help one identify the constructive and destructive behaviors one usually exhibits in conflict situations,” Sorochty continued, “in order to use more of the former in order increase the likelihood of positive outcomes.”

No replacement has yet been named, but Sorochty reviewed the job requirements, which have expanded since his arrival, for the search committee.

“I wish I could turn the clock back so I could have begun my time here much sooner than I did,” Sorochty said, “because it’s been the most enjoyable and rewarding aspect of my 41-year career in higher education and student affairs.”

“I’ll miss the people who make it a joy to come to work every day,” Sorochty said.

NEWS

the Collegian : 5

Eye on the world:

22 april 2013 Room quickly, but he never found the switch for the siren. Instead, he turned on the lights and waved his arm out the window. ER doctors reported that without his help, the driver “could have died.”

Africa MADAgaSCAR

Victoria McGouran Staff Writer Europe NETHERLANDS A song released in the Netherlands in celebration of Crown Prince Willem-Alexander’s upcoming ascension to the throne sparked public outcry after its release on Friday.

By the next day, an online petition titled “No to the King’s Song” had amassed 37,000 signatures.

The petition reads, “In protest

at this imbecilic King’s Song, I hereby abdicate as a Dutch subject,” and one signer wrote that “the song spontaneously turns you into a republican, if you aren’t one already.”

The song in question—which features 51 popular Dutch musicians—was also met with instant disdain from the National Enthronement Committee, which labelled it “overproduced” and “dreadful.”

Despite all the general hullabaloo surrounding the song—which starts gently and then bursts into rap—it has already gone straight to

From Riot on cover gulf remain to this very day.” remembered World War I biplanes commandeered by the rioters firing on the residents of Greenwood.

Other survivors have described “turpentine bombs” being dropped on buildings, leaving entire city blocks in flames.

Captives were marched to holding camps throughout the city, at baseball fields and Convention Hall (today the Brady Theater).

Even after the riot died down and the neighborhood finished burning, blacks were not allowed to leave the camps until a white person vouched for them.

Blacks who did not work for white employers had the most difficulty getting released from custody.

And after the Riot? “In short order, the Greenwood District rebounded,” Jordan-Rakestraw said of the Greenwood Cultural Center.

“Some of its pioneers and leading citizens would never return. Those who remained wholly committed to rebuilding bigger and better than ever—and they did.”

“Perhaps the greatest casualty of the Riot was the gulf of distrust it left between Tulsa’s white and black citizens. Remnants of that

Best of 2012-2013 Aug. 27 Lost and Found A book was found in McFarlin Library.

Sept. 15 4:34 Officers were dispatched to Fisher South for an intoxicated student.

Upon officers arrival it seemed that one intoxicated student attempted to go to bed in another’s student’s room.

The missing intoxicated student was located and returned to her own room. The PSM was contacted and the intoxicated students were all underage.

Sept. 15 0:20 Security officers were called to Dietler Commons area where a student had witnessed a male trying to kick over the small light posts around the sidewalks.

Officers checked the area and no suspect(s) were located. The suspect was wearing a fraternity shirt.

Adding to current historians’ problems is the bias of the witnesses to the Riot.

The now defunct Tulsa Star was a Greenwood newspaper that was torched on the second day of

the top of the Dutch iTunes chart. france A French patient with late-stage cancer saved the life of the ambulance driver who was driving him to the hospital on April 17.

The ambulance driver was having a heart attack and reportedly told the patient that he had “pins and needles in his fingers.”

The patient told reporters that he told the driver to give him the keys, saying, “my life is not in danger, but yours is.” The patient then drove to the Emergency on the courthouse steps, according to the jury, were peaceable and unarmed. Nothing could have been farther from the truth.

Greenwood recovered from the Riot, but the end of legal segregation in the 1960s tore Green-

“The greatest casualty of the Riot was the gulf of distrust it left between Tulsa’s white and black citizens” the Riot. The Tulsa World and the Tulsa Tribune both put blame on “armed Negroes.”

Oklahoma Governor JBA Robertson later called a grand jury to conduct an investigation. All members of the grand jury were white.

The blacks were unhappy but unsurprised when the jury also laid blame with the blacks. The whites

wood’s economic solidarity apart, as African-Americans gained the right to shop at the bigger discount stores south of the Frisco tracks.

As Tulsa historian Henry Whitlow put it, “The merchants of south Tulsa found that the dollar from Greenwood was just as green as the south of the tracks dollar.”

Many smaller shops, both black and white, folded in the ensuing

“The Tulsa World and the Tulsa Tribune both put blame on ‘armed Negroes’” Sept. 23 5:20 An officer observed an intoxicated person on a University bicycle.

The subject attempted to flee from officers.

Contact was made and the subject was released to the care of a friend and it was determined that the bicycle did not belong to him.

A short time later, the officer observed the subject attempting to ride the bicycle again.

The subject was arrested for public intoxication and transported to David L Moss Correctional Facility.

with a local prostate (sic).

Oct. 20 1:45 Officers on patrol observed a large cooler in the parking lot of USW. There was no one around the cooler. Officers took the cooler and turned the cooler into the property room.

The owner of the cooler contacted security and demanded his cooler be returned. The called threatened security and again demanded his cooler be returned.

The caller is not a student and was advised on the procedure to get his items returned.

Paleontologists announced the discovery of a new species of dinosaur on Thursday. Scientists are saying that this new dinosaur, about 90 million years old, was a bipedal meat-eater about the size of a large cow.

It has been named Dahalokely tokana, which means “lonely small bandit” and is the first new dinosaur species discovered in Madagascar in a decade.

The discovery also bridges a gap in the fossil record and raises intriguing questions about the evolution of animals on both Madagascar and India, which separated about the time this newly discovered creature roamed the earth.

Middle East Iraq On April 20, Iraqi forces took charge of security in an election in response to the massive unrest and widespread violence preceding the election. This is the first time Iraqi economic climate.

In the 1970s, much of Greenwood was razed to make way for I-244, part of the inner city traffic dispersal loop that was built during a period of urban renewal.

That was a huge blow to Greenwood, but the neighborhood had bounced back from bigger blows than that.

Growing awareness of the Race Riot put the issue of restoration and redevelopment of Greenwood to the fore in the 1980s and ’90s.

Immediately after the riots,

the Sigma Chi house that was asking about “Cocaine”. The VP told her to leave the house and then security was called. Officers were not able to find the female.

1:40 Officers on patrol observed a male sleeping inside a vehicle in the parking lot of Mabee West lot. Officers made contact with the subject and he was not a TU student and thought the car was his. The subject had vomited inside the vehicle.

The owner of the vehicle came to the scene and confirmed the male did not have permission to be in their car. TPD was contacted and the subject was arrested and transported to jail.

16:25 Campus Security was notified about a possible larceny that had taken place in Helmerich Hall.

Officers spoke to witnesses that stated an office supply delivery worker had removed a smart board from a classroom.

Witnesses copied the tag number and vehicle description. Officers were able to identify and locate the suspect. The items were recovered and Tulsa Police Department took over the investigation.

21:35 Officers observed a vehicle driving without headlight on.

Officers conducted a traffic stop with the student and during the contact the driver failed to put the vehicle in park and the car rolled back and made contact with the security vehicle. There was no damage to the security vehicle.

Feb. 7

Nov. 25

3:15 Officers were called to ACAC, for an accident. One international student was teaching another international student how to drive. This did not go well.

Officers were called to 3211 E. 7th St. for an unknown disturbance.

Witnesses stated that a female ran from the house yelling something.

Officers investigated the call and determined that the male was upset with the price of services

Jan. 20 1:30 The vice president of the house called security for a female inside

JAPAN The world’s oldest living man, Jiroemon Kimura, celebrated his 116th birthday on April 19 at home, where he lives under the care of his grandson’s widow.

According to reports, Kimura worked as a postman until he was 65 years old and then became a farmer until he was 90. He has 14 grandchildren and dozens of great and great-great grandchildren and has the distinction of not only being the world’s oldest living man but also the oldest living person.

CHINA China has reported 11 new cases of bird flu, with the virus now appearing in the central province of Henan and the capital, Beijing.

With the newly discovered cases, the total number of reported cases has now risen to 95 with a death toll of 17. many had blamed the “lawlessness” of blacks for the eruption of violence, and for years, the Race Riot was not taught in Oklahoma history.

But in 1985, after much wrangling with the Tulsa City Development Department, the Greenwood Chamber was able to open the doors of the Greenwood Cultural Center with the help of a federal grant and city, state and non-profit assistance.

See Riot page 9

The damage from the Tulsa Race Riot, in which a mob destroyed the black Greenwood District and abducted its residents, was estimated at as high as $300 million (adjusted for inflation) by the 2001 Commission to Study the Tulsa Race Riot.

Nov. 24

Oct. 9

Asia

Courtesy of McFarlin Special Collections

Sept. 28

9:52 A student reported that an employee was mowing grass in the area and a rock was thrown from the mower and busted her apartment window.

security has managed an election since the 2003 U.S. invasion of Iraq.

Election officials are estimating voter turnout will be around 50 percent and the election results are not expected for days. Correspondents say the election is a test of stability in Iraq ten years after the overthrow of Saddam Hussein.

3:15 Security observed a trespassed subject driving on S. Delaware Ave slamming his brakes on trying to get a security officer to run into the back of his vehicle.

Feb. 9

Feb. 28 23:00 Petit Larceny [sic]: A student from a sorority house reported that an orange cone and a wooden stool were missing from in-front of the house.

March 6 1:30 Officers were dispatched to Mayo Village for a male that had followed students from the QT store onto campus and asked to use a student’s phone.

The student refused and the male (suspect) threw a beer at the students.

Security located the suspect attempting to cut a bicycle lock cable with a pocket knife. The subject also had five county warrants, outstanding for his arrest.

March 22 9:15 A mother of a student had not heard from her daughter in over a week. Officers were sent to her apartment to check on her welfare.

Officers were given permission to enter the apartment. The student was located on the campus and contacted her mother.

March 31 1:42 Officers were called to Mayo Village apartments for a drunk student that was crying and walking around the complex.

Officers made contact with the student who exhibited all signs of intoxication.

The student refused to state where the party was and was taken back to her apartment where the PSM meet security and the victim.

The Collegian does not produce or edit the Campus Crime Watch except for content and brevity.

variety

22 April 2013

the Collegian : 6

David Bowie’s “The Next Day” pleases fans of all generations Singer-songwriter David Bowie returns in full force with his latest album, which combines elements of his previous recordings and encompasses many genres.

Stephen Lowe Student Writer

The impact that David Bowie had on the music industry during his brief stint as the world’s most fabulous rock star in the 1970s would be impossible to overestimate. Few artists can claim to have their names attached to more music, and an even smaller percentage of those have attained an equal degree of critical and popular acclaim.

Since his rise to fame, he has become an icon of the glam rock movement, as well as a symbol of unorthodox fashion and ambiguous sexuality throughout the world.

However, even the brightest stars must one day burn out, and with ten years having passed since the 2003 release of his most recent album, “Reality,” it was generally acknowledged that day had come for Bowie.

Nevertheless, reunions have rather inexplicably become the norm in the last decade (see Black Sabbath, The Stone Roses, Soundgarden), and while David Bowie has nobody but his session musicians with whom to reunite, the 2013 release of his album “The Next Day” marks a similar return from a decade-long hiatus.

On this album, fans of his ‘70s

work will be pleased to hear elements of his experimental collaborations with electronic music mogul Brian Eno, while fans of his ‘80s material will be delighted to hear that he has by no means abandoned his dance-pop inclinations.

The album opens with the title track, a deceptively straightforward piece of guitar pop laden with syncopated riffs and overthe-top vocal harmonies. The second track, however, makes it clear that this is much more than the hackneyed pop album one might expect.

This particular song, entitled “Dirty Boys,” opens with a sharply accented brass riff against a backdrop of jarring, minimalistic guitar chords (this pattern of sparse guitar arrangements persists throughout the majority of the album), eventually leading into the louder yet still subdued chorus.

From here, the album proceeds through a variety of musical styles, including psychedelia (“If You Can See Me” and “I’d Rather Be High”), space rock (“Dancing Out in Space”) and piano-driven balladry (“Where Are We Now?” and “You Feel So Lonely You Could Die”).

Of course, Bowie’s penchant for the theatrical is on full display from start to finish—well over half of the tracks sound as though they could have been taken straight out of Bowie’s 1986 film “Labyrinth”—and that alone will be enough to reassure diehard fans that he has not made too drastic a departure from his roots.

As far as musical content goes, this album breaks little new ground. Much of the material feels like a rehashing of Bowie’s previous work, though this is essentially inevitable when one considers the sheer magnitude of his discography. After all, with more than 45

years having passed since Bowie’s debut, there is virtually no stretch of the musical spectrum that he has yet to cover.

That, however, has not stopped him from trying. What is truly remarkable about this album is the way Bowie continues to push the envelope, how he insists on taking what he has done in the past one step further. In fact, many of these tracks rank among his most psychedelic works, which, considering his reputation as a pioneer of experimental music, is an extraordinary accomplishment.

If there is one major drawback to the album, it is the vocals. The most compelling moments tend to surface during the brief instrumental interludes, particularly the opening of “Dancing Out in Space” and the Danny Elfmanesque keyboard sections of “If You Can See Me.” The closing track, “Heat,” takes after his 1977 hit “Warszawa,” and would have done better had it, like its predecessor, remained instrumental. The vocals themselves, with rather notable exceptions (particularly the album’s standout track, “Valentine’s Day”), tend to be monotonous and feel practically tacked on in places.

That being said, this album remains a solid latter-day effort from one of rock n’ roll’s most highlyrespected figures. Whether or not Bowie will continue to record is unknown, but if he does choose to call it quits, this album will be a fitting swan song to one of music’s most celebrated careers.

It may never be ranked among his more legendary albums, but it demonstrates a level of originality previously thought unattainable by such a prolific artist, and it is sure to please Bowie fans of all generations.

Summer games provide adventure

Graphic by Caroline Kohlhagen

Urban Journal

creative

g

Alexander Bischoff Student Writer

On a cold morning in late December or early January, I patiently waited at the intersection of Harvard and 11th street. Looking toward the horizon, a lonely biker faded into the far-off distance.

To my right sat a double-wide pick-up truck with one passenger. It had what appeared to be a McDonald’s bag ornamenting the dashboard.

In front of me a timid minivan inched ever so carefully towards a sea of oncoming traffic. It waited for the Bud Light semi truck, the aging Buick and a stylish SUV to barrel past the intersection.

As the minivan gracelessly swerved, ignoring the now-bright red light, I caught a glimpse of its bumper sticker. Stick figures of a dog, two boys, a mom and a dad drifted out of sight.

I waited at the intersection for another green light to cycle.

Soon it was my turn to brave the barrage of oncoming traffic. I inched forward and came to a stop halfway into the intersection, left blinker flickering.

Looking for something entertaining to do this summer? Take some time to relax with these exciting upcoming games.

By Anna Bennett

Elliot Bauman

Ways to Cram for Finals

Student Writer

While the academic year may be wrapping up for the summer, the gaming industry is certainly not letting up. Here are some titles and events that players should watch for over the next few months.

“Dead Island: Riptide” Techland’s follow up to 2011’ “Dead Island” is due to hit shelves Tuesday for the PlayStation 3, Xbox 360 and PC. While “Riptide” is not officially a direct sequel to the original installment, in reality, it is just that.

Players will once again be placed on an island overrun by a zombie infection. Like “Dead Island,” the game will feature limited open-world exploration, with an additional focus on survival horror, role-playing, and action elements.

Based on previews, there is something resembling a story present, but it is completely devoid of originality. “Riptide’s” plot is nothing more than a run-ofthe-mill zombie takeover scenario.

There is little to no character development, and the flow of the game feels very forced.

That being said, nobody expects a “Dead Island” game to feature a blockbuster plot; the real draw is of the title is the experience of attempting to survive in a frantic virtual zombie apocalypse with friends, and this is where the title succeeds.

“Riptide” is definitely co-op centered, and playing the game solo strips it of its major selling point. If players are looking to do some exploring and zombie slaying with a group of buddies, then “Riptide” is a sound choice. If not, this title is a pass.

Every third car careening past me held a distracted driver, face lit up with an ominous white glow. A select few were feverishly sucking out of a jar of styrofoam. It was the typical commuter crowd.

Late that winter evening I returned to the intersection.

The herd of cars was thinner this time around, but the demographics were still the same. On average, every passenger had four doors to keep him or herself company at the quiet intersection.

I waited for a man driving an eight-seat gas-guzzling monster to pass by before turning right.

Eventually I caught him at the next light. Glancing towards his window I saw him blathering into a smartphone.

As the light turned green we drove side by side down 11th street. After passing Lewis he signaled for a right turn.

Moments before he could change lanes I noticed a moving red reflector occupying his intended trajectory—it was an earlymorning biker. I smashed the palm of my hand into the car horn. The driver violently overcorrected.

A dark four-legged figure stood in the middle of his path.

Upon reaching the next intersection I glared into his window again. This time, he had nobody to talk to.

Photo courtesy 4A Games

In 4A Games’ “Metro: Last Light,” players will control Artyom, a young soldier who must help protect his colony from the terrors that inhabit the post-apocalyptic wasteland that has consumed Moscow.

“Metro: Last Light” The “Metro” series is really a hidden gem in the gaming world. One of the few game series to be based on a book, “Metro” does an unusually excellent job of engrossing the player in a terrifying world. The “Metro” games are inspired by the Russian novel “Metro 2033” by Dmitry Glukhovsky.

In Glukhovsky’s fictional world, a nuclear war has turned Moscow into a post-apocalyptic nightmare and forced the remnants of humanity to take shelter in the depths of metro stations. Two factions, the New Soviet Union and Fourth Reich, compete over the remaining resources while also fighting off the advances of the Dark Ones, sinister creatures that lurk on the surface.

The newest installment in the game series, “Metro: Last Light,” will once again put players in control of Artyom, a young soldier who must help defend his colony from the conflict and terrors of the apocalyptic world. While the story concept of “Last Light” is certainly not original, it stands sideby-side with Bethesda’s “Fallout” series as the best implementation of a post-nuclear conflict setting.

It is very clear that developer 4A Games has put a considerable amount of quality effort into creating an engaging environment. The attention to detail and realism is fantastic: players will have to keep

constant check on their flashlight battery level and gas mask oxygen, among other gear and weapon-related issues.

Furthermore, the game is visually impressive. Dynamic lighting, improved physics and real-time weather help draw the player into the world. “Metro: Last Light” drops on May 14 for the PlayStation 3, Xbox 360 and PC. E3 2013: The 2013 Electronic Entertainment Expo is shaping up to be one of the best in a long time. This is largely to due to the fact that, after years of hype and development, the PlayStation 4 and the still unannounced next-generation Xbox will finally go head-to-head at the biggest gaming convention of the year.

It is speculated that Sony and Microsoft will both be there in full force, determined to “win” the next-generation console war.

The event is further exacerbated by the equally fierce competition between game developers. Their goal is rumored to be simple: knock Call of Duty off its podium position as the dominant “big” game series.

Likely candidates are Bungie’s “Destiny,” Ubisoft’s “Watch Dogs” and Digital Illusions CE’s “Battlefield 4.” Interested gamers should tune into the conference, which will be held June 11-13, for what looks to be an exciting time.

As classes wrap up with disturbing rapidity, it is hard not to spend every moment thinking about the allures of summer. Unfortunately, there is first a seemingly insurmountable obstacle— finals. Never fear, for there are a plethora of ways to study with varying degrees of effectiveness at the very last minute.

1. Set all the important information you need to remember to a popular tune. Sing it everywhere you go.

2. Sleep with your textbook under your pillow. Hot information rises and is absorbed into the brain via osmosis. It’s scientific and stuff.

3. Plaster the walls of your apartment or dorm with copies of the study guide.

Then, you are literally studying anytime you’re home. This only works if you don’t mind looking like a sociopath when you have company.

4. Turn your study guide into a drinking game.

5. Spend all of your time trying to get a sponsorship from Red Bull, then do all your studying in one frantic night. Hopefully you’ll be in

their next TV ad.

6. Record yourself or a friend reciting passages from the book or study guide, then listen to the recording while you work out. Perhaps not as fun as your old playlist, but now is not the time for fun.

7. Tell everyone that you have leprosy. Since your friends will no longer invite you to parties or want you to come to group meetings or events, you will finally have some time to study free of temptation or distraction.

8. Instruct your significant other that they should not, under any circumstance, have sex with you until you have studied for at least three hours.

9. Fake your own death, then show up at the final dressed in flowing white robes and claiming to have all the true answers. You just rose from the dead, how are they gonna count you off? Unfortunately, this only works once.

10. Fall asleep while someone is reading you the study guide. Then, you’ll be able to study in your dreams too.

opinion

the Collegian : 7

22 April 2013

Humanitarian aid ineffective anti-nuclear tool Nuclear arms in North Korea need to be handled in a firm fashion that does not endanger its citizens’ lives.

Nikki Hager

Student Writer

Unless you live under a rock, or in Pyongyang, you’ve probably heard that there has been increased tension on the Korean Peninsula lately.

While North Korea has been under a communist regime since the end of World War II, it has been receiving increased attention since 2002, when the country initiated plans to reactivate a nuclear reactor, and even more notice since its first successful nuclear test in 2006.

The cause for the recent increase in tension on the Korean Peninsula began in 2010 when South Korea accused the North of sinking its warship Cheonan and subsequently cut off all trade with the country.

In December 2011, former leader Kim Jong-Il was succeeded by his youngest son, Kim Jong-un.

While at first the new leader ap-

peared to be sending mixed signals, in February he continued with nuclear tests.

While the threat of nuclear war is very much a pressing issue, the United States and South Korea should reexamine the kind of policies they are pursuing because currently neither party is going to achieve its aims.

North Korea hopes that having a nuclear program will make them matter on a global scale.

The U.S., on the other hand, hopes to end nuclear proliferation and keep weapons of mass destruction out of the hands of rogue states for fairly obvious reasons.

Aside from the obvious threat to human life, I think that the United States’s goals really are not as far from those of North Korea as one might think.

When more states gain nuclear capabilities, power becomes divided amongst them.

So if North Korea gains influence through its nuclear program, the U.S. slice of world nuclear power shrinks. The U.S. can threaten nuclear war, but at the same time so can North Korea.

The effectiveness of a nuclear arsenal as a source of global influence is reduced as the number of nuclear states increases.

In order to keep North Korea from producing nuclear weapons and increasing the size of its mili-

tary, the U.S. has been pursuing humanitarian and aid-based diplomacy, which sounds really fantastic in theory.

The U.S. is offering food aid and relief to ailing parts of the population that are in extreme poverty or suffering from malnutrition. Some of the policies specifically aim to help nursing mothers and small children.

Sounds like a fantastic idea, right? Not only do we reduce the number of nuclear weapons in the world but we also get to help ailing infants!

However, North Korea is never going to accept humanitarian aid as a tradeoff for arms reduction.

Before you get any ideas that it must be their culture or that they are just bad people, remember that they share an almost identical cultural history with their South Korean neighbors up until the mid20th century.

Unfortunately, it is in the North Korean regime’s interests to keep its people starving and entirely dependent on those in power for basic survival necessities. By eliminating those social controls, the government’s grip on its nation is loosened a little bit.

If they hope to maintain the degree of power they have now, social controls are vital, unless they wanted to change the entire sociopolitical system of the country.

Graphic by Caroline Kohlhagen

So the aid packages that the U.S. and other western countries are offering now would not only limit North Korean arms, but also potentially limits its ability to control its population.

Again, power is the currency in which they trade—neither the U.S. nor the Koreas are really concerned with the “greater good.”

So if the current stalemate is a result of neither party getting what it wants, is there a way to get North Korea to stop its nuclear program without direct military action?

In my opinion, there is no easy solution. If there were, it would be receiving national attention. However, the first step is to acknowledge North Korea’s true motivations: power.

It is highly unlikely that we would be able to give them any-

thing that would be valuable enough to compensate for the global power they would lose by halting their nuclear program.

We should, however, seek ways to give the North Koreans a global voice that does not include military aggression. Unfortunately, it seems that power and violence are synonymous on a global scale.

The best plan of action includes an extension of the economic restrictions we have against North Korea.

We should limit North Korean weapons production to the best of our abilities.

The downside, however, of economic sanctions is that the outcomes not only hurt the North Korean government, but also hit the already-struggling citizens. There are no simple and easy solutions.

The Collegian: university in miniature The Collegian facilitates discourse amongst TU students, administrators and professors.

Cara Dublin

Student Writer

Seeing as all good postmodern texts are self-reflexive, The Collegian today moves one step closer to literary immortality by asking—what is the actual campus impact of this rag?

Walking into one of my Tuesday classes is deceptively like walking into a nursing home—newspapers up and waving in front of half the faces, the rest looking off into the distance vacantly, wondering vaguely if anything worth attempting to remember may happen to them today.

But the half reading the paper are, with one exception, always perusing the latest issue of The

Collegian.

Generally they even have it open to something besides the StateRun Media—unless, of course, the State-Run has taken over other sections, which our editors may need to double-ch [not in compliance Ministry of Truth guidelines].

Well, now that we’re back to business-as-usual, what happens to the people who read the nonState-Run? Barring presidential elections and major national events, Collegian news reports usually maintain an obvious relevance to life at TU and in Tulsa.

Like all papers, it sinks or floats on the strength of its content.

The paper was widely read at the beginning of this school year as students waited for circumstances surrounding President Orsak’s sudden departure to come to light. The Return of the Stead prompted the collection of souvenir issues, the University of Tulsa being back under its established and proper head.

U.S. presidential elections on a grander scale attracted several followings—those who actually wanted to learn about the candidates, and those who just wanted

to know what the writers of the paper thought, preparatory to either commending or disagreeing with those candidates.

The sports pages I can’t vouch for. Presumably somewhere in this world there are legions of rabid, obsessed, Golden Hurricane fanatics who devour the sports section voraciously. Probably they are stranded on a desert island somewhere, thus explaining their oftnoted absence from games, as well

mental recreation—gymnastics for the biases, if you will.

But perhaps The Collegian’s key role is actually best summed up by its relationship with that parasitic symbiote, the State-Run Media. For students, the State-Run does in the extreme what the rest of the paper does in some seriousness.

In their own way, each section provides a few items of new interest along with commentary and re-

“The Collegian is at its most successful when it reproduces the same campus conversation that it reflects in the first place” as their all-consuming need to eat newsprint.

Variety consistently provides humor, culture and entertainment.

Opinion is, I believe, considered primarily a delightful forum ad absurdum in which every student reader can find at least one writer to religiously mock, as a form of

flection on the usual.

Campus names like Stead and King John, the usual list of concerns such as student stress, unfortunate Caf food and beloved rivalries­—when anybody who dares to think they’re half as good as TU­—are really what unite students and The Collegian.

The students who read The Collegian are looking for perspective, intelligent campus self-reflection and a decent side-helping of snarkiness to describe their own neoGothic, windy, sometimes cricketinfested world.

Similarly, The Collegian is at its most successful when its articles, spotlights and editorials are reproduced by the same campus conversation that it reflects in the first place.

“Hey, have you seen the new article on...” can be heard echoing in the library or struggling against the wind on the U. Copies stained with Chick-Fil-A grease get passed around in ACAC—“This is the one I mentioned to you the other day, where she says...”

But The Collegian has a readership beyond the undergraduate student body, too. As a writer, I have discovered that some of this paper’s most regular readers are professors, administrators and other “real” adults in the community who share some link to campus.

In its role as a reflection of campus talk, The Collegian is a portrait of the university in miniature.

New dorm a chance for TU to be green New residence hall ought to be environmentally friendly and focus on water conservation.

Will Bramlett

Student Writer

The Collegian reported last week that the University of Tulsa is planning to build new dorms on the site of the Holmes Student Center. Any new housing on campus ought to be more environmentally friendly.

In 2011, the website greenreportcard.com gave the school a C grade (they do not use plus-minus grading yet either). In the category of “green housing,” the school was awarded a D grade.

The site said we were not making improvements with the “incorporation of LEED standards in building designs” and use of “water saving technologies.”

The state of Oklahoma is currently 3.14 inches below average rainfall totals over the last year.

The Tulsa area is experiencing moderate drought conditions.

While the National Oceanic and

Atmospheric Administration is forecasting that drought conditions will ease through mid-summer, more severe droughts will be coming.

The Arkansas River sure is low right now. I hear that is not uncommon, but I am not sure how much more it can give.

It is in the best interests of the university and the students, current and future, that we avoid draining Oklahoma’s water. The best way to conserve water in practice is to simply curb excessive usage.

Early in the morning, that is just a bit harder. I am surely not the only one who is a bit sluggish in the morning. The longer the shower is on unnecessarily, the more water wasted.

Shower timers, which limit the length of showers, have succeeded in conserving water in other parts of the world. Many hostels in Europe use them to save money.

An Australian company called Aquaflow Distributors creates and sells such devices. They claim that in the average home, most people can easily wash the body and hair and clean the teeth in less than six minutes, “but the average shower time exceeds twelve minutes.”

By providing a gentle reminder to students that it is time to move along, the school can save water.

The timers can be set to allow stu-

Graphic by Caroline Kohlhagen

dents to restart the shower without pause, so no harm would come if there are still suds.

If a person is aware that the shower will automatically shut off at some point, such awareness motivates them to finish showering in

the allotted time. Even if the person completely zones out, the lack of warm, flowing water is sure be attention-getting.

Like oil, clean, fresh water must be recognized as a limited resource. We simply cannot live

without being more efficient with our water supply.

Using a water reclamation system should be looked into as well.

Water reclamation systems take

See Water page 9

Opinion

22 April 2013

the Collegian : 8

Evaluations represent students’ chance to rate investments fessors reminding you to fill them out, which you promptly sent to the trash bin.

I did my course evaluations after typing the first few sentences of this article, and I have to say, I am experiencing mixed emotions about what just happened. While I actually enjoyed writing longwinded, drama-laced, half-joking sentiments about the courses I have taken this semester, it strikes me that most students at TU are unlikely to feel the same way.

I am not sure how course evaluations turned into some kind of public enemy, but having completed them, I can assure you they are not nearly as fearsome as you may believe.

There seems to be a big build-up around evaluations, with e-mails and flyers reminding students to complete them, yet many students ignore this and instead rant about

Course evaluations are students’ opportunity to report on quality of the product they have purchased: education.

Victoria McGouran Staff Writer

Readers of this article are probably familiar with the massive push from faculty to fill out those pesky, end-of-semester course evaluations. Perhaps most of you have already finished them—except that the idea of that happening is totally absurd.

Most likely, you all received an insane number of emails from pro-

their courses social media.

Those of you who choose not to fill out evaluations are missing the point that this is your chance to completely open up about every annoyingly foul moment of your “Intro to Inane Writers� course.

Plus, you get to do it anonymously.

While I understand that many of you feel your words will not make a difference in the course or that the instructor will not see the remarks you spent four minutes crafting, trust me when I say that there are many professors who take course evaluations very seriously.

For professors, course evaluations are like the comment section on iTunes, they allow instructors to see what students, individually and as a group, generally think of them.

See Courses page 9

To the Editor, I read Alexander’s article on drone strikes last week and while I definitely appreciated the overall argument, I was curious as to why he decided to focus narrowly on the drone program and not our military activities in the region in general.

While drones have received a good deal of flack recently from liberals and conservatives alike, they remain one of the most efficient weapons in our military arsenal when it comes to minimizing civilian casualties.

While there is still substantial collateral damage resulting from drone strikes, it is significantly lower than that resulting from manned aircraft missions or ground missions.

If his primary problem is the large amount of civilian damage

our war on terror has caused, it would be more precise to argue for an end or significant reduction to our military activities in the area than to single out the drone program.

While drones are currently the tool being used to eliminate targets throughout the Middle East, it is our military’s desire to eliminate these targets, not the drones themselves, which is ultimately responsible for the civilian casualties he is rightly outraged over.

We can eliminate or dramatically scale back our drone program, but without a comprehensive strategy to end or fundamentally rethink our war on terror innocent civilians will keep dying.

Sincerely, J.Christopher Proctor

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Inquiries regarding implementation of this policy may be addressed to the Office of Human Resources, 800 South Tucker Drive, Tulsa, Oklahoma 74104-9700, 918-631-2616. Requests for accommodation of disabilities may be addressed to the University’s 504 Coordinator, Dr. Tawny Taylor, 918-631-3814. To ensure availability of an interpreter, five to seven days notice is needed; 48 hours is recommended for all other accommodations. Advertising Policy: Advertising appearing in this publication does not imply approval or endorsement by the University of Tulsa or The Collegian for the products or services advertised. For advertising information, email The Collegian at collegian@utulsa.edu or elizabeth-cohen@utulsa.edu. The deadline for advertising is 5 p.m. on the Thursday prior to the publication. Editing Policy: The Collegian reserves the right to edit all copy submitted by all writers. This editing may take place in many forms, including grammar corrections, changes in paragraph structure or even the addition or removal of sections of content. Editorial Policy: Columnists are solely responsible for the content of their columns. Opinions expressed in columns may not represent the opinions of the entire Collegian staff, the administrative policies of the University of Tulsa, the views of the student body or our advertisers. Letter Policy: Letters to the editor must be less than 500 words. While we do not require it, letters sent via e-mail to the Collegian are encouraged. Under no circumstances will anonymous letters be published. The name of the person submitting the letter must be published with the letter. We reserve the right to edit or reject all letters.

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the Collegian : 9

From Epidemic page 10 uncomfortable with human con-

Washington’s classmate and cosurvivor Ural Jeremy is slightly more conflicted about her fate and that of her less fortunate peers.

“Whenever I would visit a friend’s house, and go to the bathroom, and then realize that they didn’t have any soap out, I’d be really grossed out. Not only would I be walking around with germs on my hands till I could get to the germ-x in my purse, but it also meant that this so-called friend of mine probably never washed their hands, and they might have come into contact with me,” she said.

She cites this as a reason for her reputation as being “prickly” and

tact. “I often had this sick, ironic hope that these non-hand-washers would die of some horrible disease, but now that they have, I feel a bit guilty.”

Although it is encouraging that a select few human beings have survived the most destructive plague in recorded history, Gross postulates that it is doubtful that the human species will survive in the long run. He believes that the survivors will likely be too afraid or grossed out to actually procreate.

All interviews were conducted via Skype, because the lone remaining reporter “didn’t want to chance getting coughed on.”

From Water page 7

However, unlike a timer, a water reclamation system does not help teach students about conserving water. By teaching students early on that we need to limit shower usage, more students will be prepared to conserve water if an extreme drought were to hit the Tulsa area.

Hopefully the university will consider investing in technologies to help bring up our grade. Solar energy would be nice. Using water reclamation would be fantastic. Installing timers would make me just as happy.

The school should be prepared for future droughts and a new, greener dorm would be the first step.

From Courses page 8

spond to these evaluations, the administration cannot hope to gain a big-picture perspective on where they succeeded and failed this semester, and certainly would find it harder to fix any major issues.

Finally—and this may just be my perspective—course evaluations can be somewhat cathartic.

Whether or not you got the grade you deserved, or skipped class all semester or totally heart-crushed on your TA, course evaluations are an opportunity to lay all the drama and stress of the semester to rest and move on.

And, if some of your professors are offering extra credit points for filling out course evaluations, that can be pretty convenient as well.

waste water and turn it into clean, drinkable water. The water is returned to the water supply rather than dumped into a stream for another town downstream to us.

The Biosphere 2 at the University of Arizona uses water reclamation. No new water is needed in the Biosphere 2 because all of the water originally in the system can be reused.

The cost for such a system would likely be much higher than a few timers for new showers. If all of the university’s waste water leaves through a single line, it may be possible to install a water reclamation system for the entire school rather than just a single dorm.

Whether those comments are positive is irrelevant—the point I am trying to make is that if an anonymous database of people reviewing everything you did in your profession existed, wouldn’t you want to see it?

Besides all that, this is your chance as a consumer to delve in and evaluate the product you have been sold. Because, when you get down to the core of what college is, it is an expensive commodity, and you as the customer have a right to inform the powers that be of what you got out of your purchase.

If enough students fail to re-

From Treatise page 3

rows up in the bleachers, unable to do the slightest thing to affect the course the next few seconds will take.

If you have ever watched a close game you passionately cared about, you understand the feeling I am trying to describe. You don’t know if you are about to witness a last second miracle end zone interception to beat a storied powerhouse on the road or a heartbreaking fake spike for a touchdown to end a challenging season.

Almost anything can happen, and you have absolutely no control over it.

There are few feelings in the modern world quite like this.

Sports offer a controlled flirt with uncertainty where the long-term material stakes for the average spectator are basically negligible, as only temporary emotions are typically at risk.

Uncertainty is exciting, especially when there is no way to affect the outcome.

Many a man has become addicted to the short period of time between the drop of the roulette ball and its final bounce, or the split second when the decisive card is flipped. When watching a sport, each game—and each play— brings with it that same uncertainty. However, unlike the roulette wheel, whose cruelty is legendary, sports create a relatively safe environment in which to partake in the excitement of this uncertainty.

There is something exhilarating about being able to place your evening in the hands of people you will never know and wager your emotions on the outcome of their actions. It is hard to describe, but anyone who has ever held their breath as a ball flew through the air toward its target probably understands the sensation I am trying to grasp at.

If not, I invite you to come to H.A. Chapman Stadium on Sept.

7 to see what all the fuss is about.

Yang Wang / Collegian

TU cheerleaders, including Travis Brachtenbach (foreground) celebrate at the Oct. 20 game against the Rice Owls. Writer J. Christopher Proctor says that sports fanship helps modern man channel him more primitive instincts into something acceptable.

From Riot page 5 In 1996, the Oklahoma legislature commissioned a study to document the history of the Race Riot and propose reparations for the disaster. According to JordanRakestraw, that commission has had partial success in righting the wrongs of 1921.

“Some of the recommendations from the Commission to Study the Tulsa Race Riot of 1921 have come to fruition,” JordanRakestraw said.

“A memorial scholarship fund was established and scholarships have been awarded,” JordanRakestraw continued. “A Greenwood Redevelopment Authority was created, but not funded. Finally, and perhaps most significantly, the John Hope Franklin Center for Reconciliation and John Hope Franklin Reconciliation Park are outgrowths of the Riot Commission’s work. The Park was funded in part with funding from the State of Oklahoma.”

Greenwood today is a sight more hopeful than it was in the gutter of the 1970s.

On one side of I-244 is a recently-constructed baseball park and a soon-to-opened apartment complex called GreenArch. On the other side stands the Greenwood Cultural Center, abutting a very modern shared campus for both Oklahoma State University-Tulsa and Langston University-Tulsa.

The creation and renovation of stores, shops and residences in Greenwood dovetails with similar development in the neighboring Brady Arts District, and the two complement each other magnificently.

But for all the charm of these sister districts, the names bear the chilling history of their former, less friendly interaction: Tate Brady, the Tulsa father and Klansman for whom the Brady District is named, volunteered as a “night watchman” on the night that Greenwood burned.

Oscar Ho contributed to this report.

22 april 2013

the

the state-run media

State-Run media Has time to kill.

Grade hyperinflation ravages TU

In other news:

J. Christopher Proctor C+ student

Panhandler lobby fights to keep the penny in circulation

60

50

Average GPA

Panic struck campus this week as TU’s grade inflation rate—typically held at a ‘naturally’ healthy 2-3 percent—skyrocketed to staggering heights of well over 100 percent per day. This dramatic increase has sent TU’s grading system into disarray, making previous grades and GPAs nearly irrelevant.

Overnight—and without obvious cause—grade distributions in classes throughout the university started to shift upwards, with most students receiving A’s, and some overachieving students receiving AA’s and even AAA’s.

This quickly lead to a vicious spiral, with professors frantically trying to keep pace with their colleagues’ grading by wildly issuing scores of AAA, A4, A5 and even AA. Charles Jenner, a long-time chemistry professor, said that in his over 20 years at TU he “had never seen anything remotely like this.” “One morning I woke up and realized I was grading way harder than everyone else,” Jenner exclaimed, “so I decided to follow suit and give out a few more A’s.

I never imagined it would lead to this.”

Students have been hit hard as well. Many who had impressive GPAs before the crisis have seen their hard work liquidated by the inflation, as typical grade point averages quickly spiraled higher and higher, with some students reporting marks as high as 200.0 by the end of the week. Students have also showed concern that explaining their excessively high grades to graduate schools or future employers might pose a challenge.

“At first I was really excited about getting six A’s in one class period,” freshman Julia Miller said, “but later in the week when I received a 40,000 percent on a calculus test I hadn’t even taken, I started to worry about how this would look on my transcript.”

As teachers issued more and more unreasonably high grades for inadequate work, many students were forced to bring buckets, suitcases and even wheelbarrows to class in order to transport

Grade hyperinflation at the University of Tulsa 70

Racism not a problem anymore, whites confirm

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Shaggy 2 Dope hopes Anne Frank “would have been a Juggalo”

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Queen McGouran to end State-Run Media

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0 1894

2012

1 April, 2013

15 April, 2013

21 April, 2013

22 April, 2013

Graphic by Jill Graves

the scores of returned papers they received.

However, not all students were disappointed with the dramatic changes. A senior history major and self-described “slacker” who asked to remain anonymous called the inflation “awesome” as his subpar 1.7 GPA morphed into a 40.5 “literally overnight.”

“I haven’t even been to class this week and I’ve somehow gotten over a dozen A’s, and I’m now set to graduate summa maxima egregia cum laude,” said the student.

“What does that even mean?”

Speculation remains rampant as to the cause of the panic, but popular accounts hold it has something to do with the recent election of President Katie McGouran. With her aggressively anti-plus-minusgrading-system platform, some grade inflation researchers have speculated that students’ confidence in the long-term validity of their grades may have been dramatically shaken.

According to senior economics major Saul Samuelson, President McGouran’s campaign promise to fight the new grading system caused many students to realize that, acting together through institutions like the Student Association, they may actually be able to exert some degree of influence over important university decisions.

“This quickly led to a state of utter chaos and devastation,” Samuelson continued. “If unchecked, the insanity precipitated by student-empowerment could mean

the end for TU.” Still, others—mostly followers of the late President Lepine—hold that the roots of the grading fiasco stem from TU fiat grading policy.

The lack of a precious metal backing students’ grades, they argue, makes the grades entirely arbitrary and liable to wild fluctuations like the one currently ravaging the campus. Despite Lepine successfully predicting hyperinflation two years ago, opponents of the so-called “gold star standard” continue to refuse to take the nowdead president seriously.

Despite its severity, there has been no official statement from the McGouran administration regarding the crisis. While reports of the extent of the inflation vary at press time, the highest independently verified grade was an “AAAAAAAAAAAAA+++++!!” given by a theater professor, who also gave the assignment three smiley face stickers, one “You’re awesome!” sticker and the words “super great job” scrawled in the margin in a frantic red script.

Whatever the cause, the effects of this calamity have been devastating to the entire TU community. Luckily, however, a few fortunate pockets of TU have been untouched by the crisis. Engineering majors continue to report that “man, like half of my class failed that exam, this class is so hard.”

Also, the Collins College of Business, after years of deliberate and aggressive grade inflation, was also spared from the recent crisis.

Roommate misuses “ironic” again Theater department hemorrhaging money, fake blood Senator Lindsay Graham: “let me waterboard the Boston Marathon bomber” See page 11 for more

Epidemic wipes out all but germophobes Anna Bennett Survivor

A new swift-acting antibioticresistant pathogen has reportedly wiped out nearly 90 percent of the population, sources say. Though few scientists remain alive to make sense of the epidemic, some speculate that a behavioral pattern rather than a genetic pattern has protected a select few from the ravaging disease.

“When the infection started spreading through the community, I thought I was a goner for sure,” said Dr. Riley Gross, a local epidemiologist. “But when slowly all the moans and cries started to die down outside my home, I thought maybe there was hope I had somehow been spared.”

After several weeks, Gross emerged from his home to attend his Lysolholics Anonymous support group. To his surprise, all but two members of the group had survived the epidemic. “I always suspected that Tyler and Marla

were posers anyway,” said Gross with some relish. “Leaving the meetings, they always touched the doorknobs with such nonchalance.”

This incident led Gross to a theory that has so far held water— the only survivors of the plague were those who were self-declared “germophobes.”

One of the last remaining TU students, Hans Washington, said he is not surprised at all by this discovery. “I always somehow knew that my obsessive hygiene and careful pathogen avoidance would help me survive an epidemic,” said the enthusiastic sophomore.

Washington describes how on numerous occasions he tried warning his peers about the dangers of drinking from the same cups or straws, but they just “didn’t listen.” He goes on to say that it was “almost satisfying” to watch those “morons drop like flies one by one.” He said his one regret is that he can’t say “I told you so!”

See Epidemic page 9

Action-packed dramatization of Boston Marathon bombings sweeps 2016 Oscars Kalen Petersen

2016 Pulitzer Prize winner On Sunday, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences awarded the 2016 Best Picture Oscar to director Kathryn Bigelow’s “Two if by Land,” an actionpacked thriller based on the reallife hunt for the Boston Marathon bombers. This will be the second Best Picture win for “Zero Dark Thirty” director Bigelow, whose “The Hurt Locker” also won in 2008.

Though the film has not yet begun production, it is expected to be hailed by critics as “taut,” “gritty and action-packed,” “a high-octane thrill ride,” and “a harrowing portrait of fanaticism and the conflict between liberty and security.”

The as-yet-unwritten script by Mark Boal, certain to be praised for its unflinchingly look at the desperate search for terrorists Dzhokar and Tamerlan Tsarnaev, has also won the 2016 Oscar for Best Adapted Screenplay.

“Getting this movie right— that’s the priority from day one,” Boal said. “And from what I’ve been told, day one will probably be sometime next August.”

“Two if by Land,” which may or may not be the movie’s final title,

also garnered a Best Supporting Actor statuette for Jeremy Renner, who—assuming he accepts the role—will compellingly portray FBI special agent Rick DesLauriers, whose single-minded obsession with finding the bombers led to the discovery of their whereabouts.

“I am so honored that the Academy has recognized the hard work and passion that’s sure to go into this presumably extraordinary film,” Renner said in his acceptance speech. “Also, Kathryn, please call my agent if you want to talk casting.”

Bigelow’s film, expected to be billed as “The story of history’s second-greatest manhunt,” will be based on actual events which took place last week in Boston, when federal agents pursued the dangerous Tsarnaev brothers through the locked-down city.

The film’s first act will show how intelligence analysts worked around-the-clock to identify and locate the brothers, while its latter half will portray the violent gunbattles and thrilling car chases involved in tracking down the terrorists.

“I think the Academy recognized this movie’s rare combination of visceral excitement and historical realism,” wrote New

York Times critic A.O. Scott. “The screenwriters will obviously have to start doing some intense research.”

While “Two if by Land” has yet to be penned, cast, or even confirmed, its Academy Award win has already generated its share of controversy. Some critics have argued that the week after a bombing that took three lives is too soon to honor a film adaptation. Others have taken issue with the film’s portrayal of violence, which is expected to be graphic.

Republicans in Congress also plan to accuse the Obama administration of leaking information about the manhunt to the filmmakers. Senator Lindsay Graham and Rep. Eric Cantor asserted Monday that the White House will, over the next few years, reveal classified details of the manhunt to Bigelow to highlight the government’s success in finding the terrorists.

“This movie, if and when it is made, will be nothing more than a propaganda tool for President Obama and the Democrats,” Cantor said. “I fully expect to be outraged.”

It is still unclear how publicity from the film will affect the presidential campaign of Hillary Clinton, who will be the Democratic presidential candidate in 2016.

Graphic by Jill Graves

The theatrical poster for Kathryn Bigelow’s soon-to-be-written and Oscar-winning retelling of the Boston Marathon bombings. The nail-biter will net $200 million in the box office, despite critics’ complaints that the action-packed blockbuster hit comes “too soon in the wake of tragedy” and “hasn’t even been made yet.”