9 March 2015

a student newspaper of the university of tulsa

Common wraps up pep talk at TU, p.6

Elias Brinkman / Collegian

march 9, 2015 issue 20 ~ volume 100

the Collegian : 2

9 March 2015

Government corner: Legislative updates

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and Family Rights in Counseling Protection Act, a bill introduced by Representative Sally Kern that makes conversion therapy explicitly legal, passed the Children, Youth and Family Services Committee.

Since the Collegian’s initial reporting, the bill has been amended so that aversion therapy, in which a patient is subjected to pain, would not be protected under the bill.

As amended, it passed 5–3. All five in favor are Republicans, while one Republican and two Democrats opposed.

Representative Sally Kern’s Pres-

ervation of Sovereignty and Marriage Act, which attempts to ban state recognition of same-sex marriage, passed the Judiciary and Civil Procedure Committee.

It passed 5–3, with all Republicans in favor and all Democrats opposed.

The Oklahoma Education Savings Account Act failed to pass committee after a 9–9 vote. Had it passed, it would have allowed parents to utilize state funds on private education.

The four March 3 bond measures for Tulsa Public Schools passed with over 80 percent of the vote each.

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NEWS

9 March 2015

the Collegian : 3

Camden Sophisticated Sisters provides safe environment for kids Tawanda Jones, founder of the Camden Sophisticated Sisters, spoke at TU last week about the effects of race and poverty found in cities across the U.S. Kayleigh Thesenvitz Student Writer Camden Sophisticated Sisters is a non-profit organization based in Camden, New Jersey. Tawanda Jones, the organization’s founder, spoke at TU on Tuesday, March 3.

The full name of Jones’s organization is Camden Sophisticated Sisters, Distinguished Brothers and the Almighty Percussion Sound. It offers the youth of Camden an outlet and safe environment through a drill team and drumline.

Camden, NJ was ranked at the top of a 2014 list of the most dangerous cities in the U.S. Children face gang violence, bullying, teen pregnancy and suicide. The high school graduation rate in 2013 was 53.4 percent.

Camden Sophisticated Sisters came into being by chance when Jones was fifteen years old. Jones went with her cousin to audition for a drill team at the Camden Youth Activities Center. The director of the program encouraged her to stay and be the captain of the team.

The program lasted for about a year, but lost its funding.

“That happens a lot in Camden.

Programs start but can never seem to survive past a year,” Jones said.

Within days, the parents of the children enrolled in the drill team

gathered at Jones’s home to convince her to continue the team.

With her grandfather’s support, Jones continued to work with the team.

For years the team practiced under bridges and in vacant lots.

Even more recently the team was housed in an empty water tower.

“It was all about survival and keeping those kids safe,” Jones remarked. “The local drug dealers would actually warn us, ‘Are you practicing outside today? Today might not be a good day.’”

323 children are currently involved in CSS, with 200 more on the waiting list to join.

“Practice starts at 5, but sometimes we don’t start until 5:25 because I take the time to hug and kiss them or ask them how their day was,” said Jones.

In order to remain a part of the

She has her kids stand in unity circles, in which they hold hands and do positive, team-building chants at each practice.

One such chant is, “It is possible. It is never impossible. If I can believe than I can achieve. It is possible. It is possible. It is possible.”

Taron G., one of the 4,000 alumni, gave this testimonial: “We’re in such a state of poverty and violence that it scares people from us when, honestly, we need the most help. The best way for me to describe Wawa (Jones) is like, if this was Gotham City, she would be Batman.”

Jones’s family is fully involved in the organization as well. Her husband and children all help teach and care for these kids.

“Someone has to be an advocate for these children,” Jones said.

“It was all about survival and keeping those kids safe”

program, students have to maintain at least a C average in school and do 200 hours of community service a year. In 30 years, despite low standards for Camden’s youth, CSS boasts a 100 percent graduation rate.

“These kids want to feel good about themselves,” Jones said.

“It’s more than drill team. For the children, it’s their life; they dance their pain away,” she said.

“Just know, they are not their circumstances, just because they live in Camden, NJ; I want people to start looking at them as human beings, kids who can make it.”

2:00 a.m.

Officers were dispatched to investigate possible drug use at Fisher South Hall. Officers found drug paraphernalia, numerous empty liquor bottles and beer cans, and a .22 caliber bullet. The drug and alcohol contraband were confiscated and destroyed. The bullet was locked up for investigation.

Feb. 25 11:35 p.m.

While on routine patrol Officers saw an EMSA at the West Park apartments. EMSA personnel were unable to enter the building. When officers arrived the ambulance had left the area but they contacted EMSA via their non-emergency number to verify if medical assistance was needed in the building.

No assistance was needed in the building.

11:17 p.m.

Officers were dispatched to Mayo Village Apartments in reference to a noise complaint. Upon arrival officers immediately heard noise coming from an apartment. The owner of the apartment was identified and was advised keep the noise down and issued a housing contact card for the infraction.

8:10 a.m.

University of Tulsa Security Officers and the Tulsa Police Department responded to a call regarding someone attempting to enter the east doors of the University School. Officers made contact with the individual and issued them a trespass warning.

12:02 p.m.

A student witnessed two individuals, whom officers have not yet identified, removing items from the lobby of the Pat Case Dining Facility. A thorough search of the area, including an extensive video footage investigation, is ongoing.

Feb. 26 6:00 p.m.

Officers conducted a pedestrian check on a suspicious man near Rayzor Hall. The man claimed to be cutting through campus while walking home. Officers identified him as non-TU affiliated and issued him a Trespass Warning.

Feb. 28 11:30 a.m.

Officers were dispatched to investigate a larceny that occurred in John Mabee Hall dormitory. The stolen property was taken from the lobby between the hours of 1730 the previous day and 1130 hours this morning.

1:30 a.m.

Officers responded to Tucker Drive on a report of a vehicle driving erratically. Arriving officers found no vehicle matching the description of the suspected vehicle.

March 2 9:40 a.m.

Officers were dispatched to the McFarlin library regarding two suspicious people. One was wearing a red coat and jeans and the other was wearing a brown coat and khakis. They were non TU affiliates and were uncooperative with Officers, so they were asked to leave campus and did so without any incident. The two were not warned for trespassing because Officers were unable to obtain any information from them.

March 3 10:35 a.m.

Officers were dispatched to a call regarding a person being struck by a work truck. Officers located the victim and suspect in the McFarlin Library Lot. On duty TPD also responded to the call, and wrote a report. The victim was transported

by EMSA to St. John’s Hospital.

March 5 10:15 p.m.

Officers responded to an injured employee [who] slipped on ice and suffered injuries to their hands, wrists, shoulders and knees. The employee refused treatment.

The Collegian does not produce or edit the Campus Crime Watch except for content and brevity.

Oscar Ho Student Writer Tinder charges according to age on Internet Tinder, a popular dating app, intends to charge older users more for premium features in Tinder Plus. In the United States those over the age of 30 face double the fee to use functions such as Passport and Rewind. The determining age varies from country to country. Tinder says that the reason for this pricing model is based on under 30s’ ability to pay versus over 30s’ ability to pay.

Cartel leader captured in Mexico The Mexican Army and the Mexican Federal Police arrested the leader of the Zetas drug cartel in the city of Monterrey. The capture of Omar Trevino Morales came a week after Mexican Federal Police arrested Servando Gomez, the leader of the Knights Templar cartel.

Morales had been wanted in Mexico and in the United States for drug trafficking, murder and kidnapping. Morales was taken to Mexico City and presented to the media before being taken to prison.

US Ambassador attacked in South Korea The United States ambassador to South Korea suffered a knife attack while he was attending a breakfast meeting. Mark Lippert was slashed across the face and left hand. Blood was seen spattered on the dining table and in the breakfast.

Lippert was taken to a hospital immediately, where his injuries were described as non-life-threatening. “Doing well & in great spirits,” he tweeted shortly afterward. “Will be back ASAP!” The assailant, Kim Ki-Jong, was quickly subdued by security.

Kim has a history of violent demonstration against the North/South Korean split. He believes in a reunification of the two Koreas and that the United States is a major obstacle to such a realization.

Although people like Kim are in the minority in South Korea, they have considerable influence. At one point, they formed a political party and won five seats in Parliament.

Malaysians remember missing plane Malaysians remembered the victims of Malaysian Airlines Flight MH370 on the one year anniversary of the plane’s disappearance. Ceremonies took place throughout the day Sunday. Additionally, the Malaysian government issued a report.

Although filled with interviews and details on the plane’s disposition around the time of the disappearance, it reportedly contains no new clues pertaining to the cause of the disappearance.

Neither does it contain information pointing to the location of the wreckage. Families of those on board MH370 dismissed the report as useless.

Flight MH370 vanished last year while flying from Kuala Lumpur to Beijing. No trace of the plane, its crew or the passengers has been found. However, the search is ongoing in the southern Indian Ocean.

Bill would fire heads of ten Okla. state agencies Ten positions to be cleared, replacements would be appointed by Governor Fallin.

Wade Crawford Sports Writer A bill that would give Governor Mary Fallin the opportunity to appoint the heads of ten state agencies passed a state Senate committee.

If the bill becomes law, the heads of ten different state agencies and boards will have their positions terminated at the beginning of the next year.

The replacements to these positions will be appointed by the Governor.

Senate Bill 829 calls for the termination of the executive directors of state boards concerning podiatry, dentistry, pharmacy, medical licensure, osteopathy, veterinary

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This editing may take place in many forms, including grammar corrections, changes in paragraph structure or even the addition or removal of sections of content. Editorial Policy: Columnists are solely responsible for the content of their columns. Opinions expressed in columns may not represent the opinions of the entire Collegian staff, the administrative policies of the University of Tulsa, the views of the student body or our advertisers. Letter Policy: Letters to the editor must be less than 500 words. While we do not require it, letters sent via e-mail to the Collegian are encouraged. Under no circumstances will anonymous letters be published. The name of the person submitting the letter must be published with the letter. We reserve the right to edit or reject all letters. The deadline for letters is 5 p.m. on the Saturday prior to publication.

and juvenile affairs.

Also terminated is the Chief Operating Officer of the Oklahoma Health Care Authority, the Commissioner of Mental Health and Substance Abuse Services, and the Commissioner of the State Board of Health.

The bill was put into motion

by Senator Nathan Dahm, a Republican from Broken Arrow.

The first-term senator says that the bill is still a “work in progress” and “open to major revisions.”

The bill was passed through the Senate General Government Committee 5–4 on Monday.

Senators that voted in the bill’s favor were republicans Dahm, Stephanie Bice, Corey Brooks, David Holt and Ralph Shortey.

Fallin’s spokesman, Alex Weintz, says that the Governor did not request the bill but does support it.

editor-in-chief—Kyle Walker managing editor—Conor Fellin news editor—Morgan Krueger sports editor—Matt Rechtien variety editor—Abigail LaBounty commentary & barricade editor—Giselle Willis satire editor—Fraser Kastner photo & graphics editor—Elias Brinkman copy editor—Amanda Hagedorn apprentice editor—Michaela Flonard business & advertising manager—Jesse Keipp distribution manager—Walker Womack editorial consultant—Nikki Hager web manager—Sam Chott social media manager—Charlie McQuigg

NEWS

the Collegian : 4

Students work to clean up a rock bed at the Westside YMCA during this year’s Service Day.

9 March 2015

Greg Diskin / Collegian

Service Day provides opportunity for TU to give back University of Tulsa students gathered throughout Tulsa on Saturday to provide services for the community.

Kayleigh Thesenvitz Student Writer Nearly 700 students volunteered with 22 separate organizations in Tulsa this past Saturday.

In the last four months a team of students including Patrick Culp, Caleb Lareau, Austin Carr, Colleen Yoder, Phil Acosta and Emma Moseley dedicated roughly 100 hours between them to planning this massive project.

Their responsibilities included renting out buildings, ordering and delivering large amounts of food, getting the promotional clothing approved by the Office of Student Affairs, ordering such clothing, arranging transportation and finding places for everyone to volunteer.

The date was set back almost a month due to poor weather conditions, which caused major complications to the event. Nearly 100 people and a few organizations backed out after the event was delayed.

“You would be amazed how many organizations declined our help because they couldn’t think of anything that they wanted help with,” said Culp.

The organizations that saw the most students were A Third Place, YMCA, Up With Trees and Special Kids Care.

At the Westside YMCA, students cleaned up the entrance, a rock bed and a volleyball court in preparation for spring and summer day camps put on for children of the community.

The YMCA director said, “These are projects that would take our staff a tremendous amount of time to do.”

Engineering student Jeremy Savo said, “I like seeing all kinds of people come together to work on a big project because you get to see the progress of it in one day.”

“We all have a blast every year,” said student Ryan DeCook,“This is my third year, and it’s been a great time every year.”

Many students went to A Third Place Community Foundation in Turley, OK. According to Ron Robinson, the executive director of A Third Place, the organization is “a grassroots, non-profit, all-volunteer community renewal organization.”

Students had multiple responsibilities at two locations owned by A Third Place.

Some worked in the main building, helping box up food in a food pantry.

Others worked in a community garden helping to prepare flower beds, construct tables and clear a pedestrian trail so that community members could continue to walk through the garden safely.

Katie Hoffman, Kate Dillon, Bree Vanderburgh and Andrew Parker, members of Alpha Phi Omega, weeded gardens to prepare them for planting later in the spring.

“We are all individuals who like doing service. Service Day is one of our biggest days of the year,” Hoffman shared.

Mathematics and biochemistry major Moujtaba Kasmani signed up for Service Day because, “It’s a good way to give back to the community.”

Meanwhile, members of the TU Student Veteran Organization cleared out a pathway that community members use to go to the post office and grocery store.

“We thought it would be good to give back; we had the opportunity and some people who signed up, so we thought we’d do it together as an organization,” shared Matt Luetjen, a member of the Student Veteran Organization.

At Special Kids Care, students helped paint over some graffiti with a mural and

whitewashed a fence. The organization offers childcare services for children with disabilities.

Sophi McArthur, a member of Tri-Delta said, “What (Special Kids Care) do is so amazing, and they work so hard everyday to help the kids, so its nice to come here and help them out.”

Kappa Alpha brought 40 guys to help dig holes and plant trees along highway 169 with Up With Trees.

KA’s President Noah Roberts said, “It’s a good way to hang out with your friends and do something good for the community.”

“We’ve been partnering with the University of Tulsa; they’ll bring in 100-plus students that will help us go from one plateau to another,” said Robinson, a member of A Third Place.

Other organizations echoed this sentiment.

“Every little bit helps,” said the director from YMCA. To conclude a day of fun and labor, Service Day organizer Culp said, “I hope everyone that came out had a good time, and hopefully we’ll be able to keep it on its scheduled date next year.”

Anti-violence programming becomes a fixture at TU This school year, campus organizations from the student-run SAVE to the Collins Fitness Center have put on anti-violence programs.

Nikki Hager Editorial Consultant Twenty-eight and a half percent of college women report experiencing an attempted or completed sexual assault during or prior to entering college, according to the Campus Sexual Assault Survey in 2007.

In the 2014-2015 academic year alone, five sexual assaults have been reported on TU’s campus. While sexual assault may be the most talked about form of violence at universities, other forms of violence also occur, including verbal, emotional and physical violence.

This year there have been several additions to TU programming that attempt to address violence on campus.

one must first understand what is going on,” Worthy said. “Simply having discussions with your friends about, for example, rape culture and verbal abuse is doing something positive.”

In addition to the birth of SAVE, there have been several additions to Advocacy Alliance’s programs. Dr. Joanne Davis, Advocacy Alliance member and Co-Director of TITAN, the Tulsa Institute of Trauma, Adversity and Injustice, came to SAVE’s meeting last week to speak about a new bystander intervention approach.

“The way we’re approaching violence education right now and trying to prevent interpersonal violence is very different from the way that it used to be done. It used to be that you would get a whole bunch of women together and say things like ‘don’t wear your hair in a ponytail,’ or ‘don’t wear a short skirt,’ or ‘don’t walk alone at night.’

The approach was ‘don’t do these things and don’t act like this.’ It was all about risk prevention and it was wholly unhelpful,” said Davis.

“Awareness about these issues is often the first step. In order to make a positive impact, one must first understand what is going on.”

First, there has been the creation of SAVE, the Student Alliance for Violence Education, which aims to educate and raise awareness about sexual, emotional and physical abuse.

Senior Sonja Worthy said she was inspired to start the organization in order to provide undergraduates with more opportunities to address issues of abuse. Worthy has worked with the Advocacy Alliance, which is the official committee of trained faculty, staff and graduate students that works to eliminate violence on campus.

“Awareness about these issues is often the first step. In order to make a positive impact,

Under this approach, men were told, “don’t be bad people, and don’t do bad things. It was always, ‘blame, blame, blame.’” She said this approach does not work, because most men are not violent.

Davis emphasized that the approach experts are taking now is bystander intervention: “it’s not on the victims to make sure they’re not victimized, and it’s not on the men to make sure they’re not being perpetrators. It is a problem for everybody. This is a model that recognizes that men are not the only perpetrators of violence and that women are not the only victims. It is everyone’s responsibility to prevent violence.”

The bystander model teaches individuals how to recognize situations that could potentially lead to violence and how to intervene.

The Advocacy Alliance will begin a “train the trainer” model. Several weekends ago, a group of faculty, staff and graduate students went through a thorough and ex-

the Director for the Collins Fitness Center.

“We wanted to take an approach so people can be aware and not get themselves into dangerous situations.”

Wafer-Johnston said she wants to create a space where students are able to talk about issues they might not be comfortable talking about.

tensive training program put on by “We End Violence,” a program that has been empirically proven to be effective. Starting next fall, they will begin teaching undergraduate student leaders how to teach groups of students the bystander intervention approach.

The course to become a trainer will last four hours, and the classes run by student trainers run 90 minutes.

In addition to the Advocacy Alliance programing, Campus Recreation is putting on a series called “The First Line of SelfDefense is Self-Awareness,” which features hour-long workshops on seven topics including such as, “Are you concerned about your relationship?” and “New on the job, safely entering the workforce.”

The programs are taught by Anne Sheaff, who teaches a self-defense class.

“We don’t want to take a ‘pound your head into the ground,’ ‘be scared’ approach to self defense,” said Mary Wafer-Johnston

“What do you do if you’re in a fraternity and a drunk girl passes out in your room?

What is your responsibility? You might not know her, you might not be friends with her.

Does anyone ever sit down and talk to you about that?” Wafer-Johnston said.

They also did a program about selfawareness for the international students, to address both how to safely navigate Tulsa and to discuss cultural norms.

Sheaff’s background is in martial arts.

While some of her classes teach physical defense tactics, others are entirely discussion. “99 percent of self-defense is mental.

It’s how you carry yourself,” said Sheaff.

“The number one thing is to be proactive and avoid potentially dangerous situations.”

Sheaff said that she and Wafer-Johnston sat down and tried to determine what classes they thought students would be interested in talking about and learning about. “We’re still experimenting about what works.”

“99 percent of self-defense is mental.

It’s how you carry yourself.”

In last week’s issue, the Variety article “TU Spring Film Festival screens pleasing student work” should have been attributed to “Maddi Birkey.” It should have been credit to “Maddi Birky.”

NEWS

9 March 2015

the Collegian : 5

Rep. Griffith sponsors bill to combat rape in Okla. schools

A bill aimed at combating rape and sexual assault in public schools passed commitee Tuesday.

Brennen VanderVeen Politics Reporter

On March 3, the Oklahoma House of Representatives passed a bill 95–1 that amends the requirements for Safe School Committees. If the bill passes the Senate and is signed by Governor Fallin, Safe School Committees will be explicitly empowered to have programs combating rape and sexual assault. The amended portion reads as follows: “The Safe School Committee

may study and make recommendations to the principal regarding the development of a rape or sexual assault response program that may be implemented at the school site that would inform students and school staff on the appropriate emotional response and victim support needs and treatment following a rape or sexual assault incident that occurs at school or involves a student.”

The House version of the bill was sponsored by Rep. Claudia Griffith (D-Norman). She cites the alleged rape of three young women by a student named Tristen Killman-Hardin as a need for this bill. All were Norman students.

It’s alleged that the three young women were bullied out of school.

Killman-Hardin has been suspended and arrested.

Rep. Griffith also cited the recent arrest of three Westmoore High School students for allegedly having sexual intercourse with a 15 year old girl on Jan. 26. Since all three are over 18 and the age of consent is 16, they could be charged with second degree rape.

The statutory rape involving the Westmoore High School students did not take place on campus but at a house. However, the victim has allegedly experienced bullying on social media. Rep. Griffith, a former nurse, explains that she knows “how hard it is to treat a victim of rape and … the training needed to help those victims emotionally as a first responder.”

New TPS superintendent selected Dr. Deborah Gist will replace Dr. Keith Ballard as superintendent of Tulsa Public Schools this year, though hundreds of teachers disagreed with this decision.

Nikki Hager Editorial Consultant Last month, the Tulsa Public Schools (TPS) Board declared Dr. Deborah Gist the new superintendent of the school system. She’s a Tulsa native who graduated from Memorial High School, a school in the TPS system, but has been working with the Rhode Island Department of Education since 2009.

Board President Ruth Ann Fate told Channel 2 News that Gist is a “courageous innovator” who knows the Tulsa community well and is understanding of teacher needs because she was a teacher herself for eight years.

The TPS Board released a fact sheet on Gist stating that Gist oversaw a 50 percent decrease in African American student dropout rates in Rhode Island.

Before the board voted on Gist, there was a petition making rounds against hiring her, calling Gist a “Janet Barresi clone” (Barresi is Oklahoma’s former state superintendent). A group of educators and concerned citizens protested outside of the Tulsa Public Schools Education Service Center with the slogan “Reboot & Reconsider.”

Dr. Gist was one of two finalists for the position, but her opponent, Millard House II, dropped out of the race. The petition asked that the school board begin its search over again instead of voting on the only candidate left. It received 639 signatures.

Shawna Keller, TPS Board member, told Channel 2 News that although it was discomforting for her to not vote the way teachers wanted, she felt she ultimately had to do what was best for the children of TPS. Ferguson-Palmer told the Tulsa World that she and the other teachers walked out because “the voice of the teachers was ignored.”

However, Ferguson-Palmer has since met with Gist individually.

She said that she and Gist know they “won’t always be on the same page” but are “committed to keeping the lines of communication open, honest, and respectful.”

Teachers walked out because “the voice of the teachers was ignored.”

On the night of the vote, board members expressed approval for Gist. Patti Ferguson-Palmer, President of the Tulsa Classroom Teachers Association, and about a dozen other teachers walked out of the room in protest before the vote was even taken. Gist was voted in 7–0.

The two also talked about low morale and lack of autonomy for teachers. The TPS Board is working on an agreement that would allow Gist to start working with current superintendent Keith Ballard before the beginning of her term on July 1.

Graphic by Sam Beckmann

Wednesday, March 11 Lecture on education and intellectual maturity

The Intellectual Public and its Problems will be held in the Tyrrell Hall auditorium at 5:30 p.m. Robert O. McClintock, an emeritus professor in the Historical and Philosophical Foundations of education at Teachers College, Columbia University, will speak on whether prevalent educational procedures in schooling and higher education are well-adapted to cultivating the intellectual maturity of the public.

Friday, March 13

Drive-in theater re-opeing for buisness

The Admiral Twin Drive-In is re-opening! The gates will open at 6:30, it is first come first serve, admission prices are: 12 years and up $7 while ages 3 through 11 are $3. For their opening on Friday they will be showing Cinderella at 7:30 p.m. and then McFarland USA at 9:20 p.m on the East Screen. On the West Screen they will show Focus at 7:35 p.m. and Kingsman at 9:20 p.m.

Saturday, March 14 Dinosaurs come to the Tulsa Zoo

Zoorassic Park 2 will take guests back in time with 26 giant displays. The temporary exhibit will showcase 11 dinosaur species, nine of which are making their first stop at the Tulsa Zoo.

A few featured dinosaur species include the 40 foot-long Tyrannosaurus Rex and the Triceratops. Each dinosaur display is animatronic, allowing for realistic movements, including the ability to gnash their teeth and roar.

Saturday, March 28 Veggie extravaganza

Josh Kirschenbaum, Business/Product Manager for Vegetables, Pa American Seed Company will share his tips on producing successful and bountiful vegetable crops. This event will take place at 10 a.m. at the Tulsa Garden Center at 2435 S. Peoria Ave. Reservations are required and can be made at www.tulsagardencenter. com. There is a $10 fee for TGC members, and a $12 fee for nonmembers.

The Collegian does not produce all event descriptions in the Community Calendar. Contact News Editor Morgan Krueger at morgankrueger@utulsa.edu with events.

We’re betting your spring break will be better than this.

Send us your spring break photos and we’ll run them in our next issue.

Send your photo, along with the names of everyone appearing in it, to morgan-krueger@utulsa.edu

variety

the Collegian : 6

9 March 2015

Frogbelly and Symphony all over the place

Frogbelly and Symphony’s album art is as uselessly eclectic as their music. If you look closely, you can see a dolphin with the British flag printed on its torso.

“Bright Blue Ow Sleep” is a new album from indie band Frogbelly and Symphony. While the band has some inherent talent, it’s mostly frittered away while they try to do too many things at once.

Adam Lux Student Writer Going into this album with only the band name, the album name and the cover art, I didn’t expect much. I thought they were going to be some Neutral Milk Hotel wannabes, but instead of changing the face of music with an amazing combination of sounds and killer lyrics, like NMH, I thought Frogbelly was just going to be bad.

I mean just look at the cover art.

It has too many pop culture references to count and tons of meaningless “symbolic imagery.” The thing’s like an “I SPY” book, but instead of being super interesting and fun it’s just strange and offputting. The point is I didn’t have

high expectations coming into this.

I didn’t know what I was in for when I loaded up “Blue Bright Ow Sleep” by Frogbelly and Symphony. The album starts out pretty quick with “Minderbinder” which begins with with a pretty standard rock sound with a pinch of early punk influence thrown in. However there is a Neutral Milk Hotelesque haunting backtone which persists throughout the entire song.

“Minderbinder” starts with a fairly forgettable vocal performance with basically throwaway lyrics, but through its many key and time changes ends up with a rap-like spoken word section interlude which strings together a nearly uninterpretable string of references and name drops without

any context whatsoever.

Liz Hanley, the main female vocalist, has a soft gravel in her, much like Aja Volkman from Nico Vega. For the most part she’s decent with it, but a couple times in each song you notice that she doesn’t really have the control to pull it off that well.

In my opinion Frogbelly and Symphony’s biggest problem is that they’re all over the place.

They’ve got ‘70s rock guitar, experimental indie vocals, blues, rhythm and poetry, and more key and tempo changes than you can count. Their only song that retains any kind of coherence is “Shin-

It seems as if they don’t really know what works and what doesn’t.

Tom Hanley, the main male vocalist, has a mid range and mostly smooth sound. His parts are pleasant but nothing that exciting. I also believe their vocal talents are partially tainted by the lyrics they’re singing, which at best are imitations of other bands, and at worst non-coherent throwaway bullshit.

Common inspires despite overlooking social issues

gle,” an Irish rock ballad which, although musically pleasing, includes lyrics that are basically what people would say if asked what Irish people sound like.

It’s not like the members aren’t musically talented either. There are some really awesome parts in some songs, but they are often

Courtesy Frogbelly and Symphony

surrounded by unrelated genres smashed together with apparently very little thought or finesse. “Ride off into the Sunset and Disappear” has some amazing jazz bass and drums put together with spooky oh-ing which just doesn’t mix.

“Cola in Mongolia” is a decent soft indie rock jam with a killer guitar solo at the end of it that just doesn’t seem to fit.

Ultimately my assessment of this band is that they have potential. They have musical talent in a wide range of genres and aren’t afraid to experiment. However it seems as if they don’t really know what works and what doesn’t.

“Bright Blue Ow Sleep” is an album which will mostly leave you wondering if the songs got all mixed together, with brief stretches of decently executed rifts and interludes.

Least Known Spring Break Destinations Tired of going to Cancun and Panama City Beach for spring break? Want to mix things up with something a little more eclectic? Well we’ve picked out a few exciting spring break locales you probably haven’t heard of.

Conor Fellin Managing Editor 1. Nagorno-Karabakh: The international community may not recognize it as an independent country, but don’t tell that to the proud and selfgoverning residents of these Azerbaijani highlands! Nagorno-Karabakh is completely landlocked, so there will be literally no one competing with you for a spot on the beach.

2. The Mariana Trench: This trench at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean is off the beaten path, but it features some of the most breath-taking sites in the world.

Greg Diskin / Collegian

Common most recently won an Oscar for Best Original Song for collaborating with John Legend on “Glory” from the movie “Selma.”

Common, an award-winning hip-hop and rap artist, spoke Friday about “Greatness,” but not the billed “variety of topics, ranging from social issues and current events to challenges on the horizon.”

Fraser Kastner Satire Editor Common, an award-winning hip hop artist from Chicago, spoke at the Reynolds Center last Friday.

He began his talk with a freestyle rap that lasted several minutes and name-dropped Tacos Don Francisco, Mayo Village and 7th Street House. Mentioning TU-area landmarks was a nice touch, and it made it seem like he cared about where he was.

After the rap, Common settled into the night’s main event: a talk about his thoughts on greatness. In the “Common dictionary,” as he calls it, greatness is about achieving the most one can, about reaching full potential.

He talked about his experiences growing up in the South Side of Chicago, losing Grammys to friend and former label-mate Kanye West, breaking up with Erykah Badu and the subsequent soul-searching that, according to

Common, led to some of his greatest successes.

It’s easy to talk about greatness when you run with the likes of Yeezy and John Legend, but Common, staying true to his name, came across as grounded and level-headed, even relatable. He shared stories about having doubts and hard times, even as a successful MC. Greatness, as Common sees it, is about finding, believing and living the path that will lead you to fulfilling your greatest potential.

Out of context, it sounds like a cheap catchphrase for a motivational speaker, but coming from him it sounds more like a successful person is telling us how he made it to where he is.

Less successful was the brief question and answer portion of the talk. Because it was advertised as a talk about current issues, many people asked questions about social problems that Common didn’t really have answers for.

To be fair, even though Common has a reputation as a sociallyconscious rapper, his expertise is in music and entertainment rather than activism. He did a fair job answering the questions, considering the fact that he had no time to prepare and isn’t very connected to many of the issues he was asked about.

My main criticism of the talk was that it was advertised as something that it was not. The fliers said that it was to be “a moderated conversation on a variety of topics, ranging from social issues and current events to challenges on the horizon.”

What I expected was a discussion from a socially conscious person about social issues. What I got was more or less a motivational speech from a famous person. This is not to say that it wasn’t worth hearing, but if you came expecting what was advertised, you were probably disappointed.

3. US West 1542: You may not have thought you’d be spending spring break in some random students’ apartment, and believe me, neither did they!

4. Grand Island, Nebraska: If you’re too hip for actual islands, Grand Island, Nebraska, is the place for you. Visit the historic Plum Street Station, or celebrate the Children’s Groundwater Festival. Or stop into any local farmhouse to enjoy some genuine midwestern culture.

5. Abandoned building at 155 Washington Ave., knock twice and ask for Burt: Once Atlanta’s best kept secret, this hip spring break location is still Atlanta’s best kept secret. So scram.

6. Pencil Museum, Keswick, UK: What better way to cool off after a long day at Britain’s brisk beaches than by visiting the site of the world’s first pencil? Find out how colored pencils get their color, and learn about the pencils used by RAF pilots.

7. My house: Though it is one of the most underrated spring break attractions in the world, my house is full of plenty of love and attention for anyone who just pays me a short visit please don’t let me be alone this spring break.

8. Atop the third Mizzou billboard between Rolla and Springfield on I-44: Soak up some rays, feel the wind in your face and let the sound of trucks speeding by at 70 miles per hour soothe you to sleep.

9. The abyss of Queen Nesuthraster: It may not sound like an exciting place to be, but you’ll grow to like this locale once you EMBRACE THE INEVITABLE ARRIVAL OF THE ANCIENT ONES. 10. Tulsa, Okla.: Impress all of your hipster friends with this less frequently visited vacation spot. I know it may sound like it’s in the middle of nowhere, but this art deco-infused Midwestern town has its fair share of charms.

variety

9 March 2015

the Collegian : 7

Charlie Hebdo’s Old Testament streak How René Magritte, William Hogarth and the Book of Exodus illuminate contemporary satire

Kyle Walker Editor-in-Chief An image is not the thing it represents. This point was made most poignantly by René Magritte when he wrote “Ceci n’est pas une pipe” beneath a perfectly adequate, twoby-three foot painting of a tobacco pipe.

Clare Haynes, Bell Visiting Professor of Anglican and Ecumenical Studies, brought it once more to life in a Thursday talk about visual satire that was laced with humor and bracketed by deadly seriousness.

Indeed, in the wake of January’s attack at Paris magazine Charlie Hebdo, no consideration of the topic could avoid touching, however lightly, on the specter of violence. I certainly expected it to loom menacingly in the background.

In her lecture, “A Laughing Matter? Religious Satire from William Hogarth to Charlie Hebdo,” Haynes did not shy away from this specter, but neither did she obsess over it. Instead, she mined 17th and 18th century British religious satire for nuggets of insight applicable to the genre at large.

Nuggets like this: “Cartoons are not really the place to go for sophisticated political analysis,” or more seriously, “Cartoons exaggerate, lie, can be ambiguous and deliberately omit the truth.”

In pulling my imagination away from the virtual trauma of the Charlie Hebdo shootings and focusing it on a carefully laid out section of British art history, Haynes offered a sort of momentary convalescence. For a time, the question on my mind was “What does satire do?” instead of the more politically and existentially threatening, “What does radical political or religious violence mean for free speech?”

So, what does satire, specifically religious satire, do? In 18th century Britain, it both “rends” and “mends,” Haynes said. It skewers the perceived hypocrisies of both laity and clergy, but often seeks to guide both back to a more moderate, more pious religious life—and

Courtesy Wikimedia Commons

William Hogarth’s 1736 engraving, “The Sleepy Congregation,” was a criticism of the contemporary state of religion.

sometimes it lambasts Catholics.

But usually just foreign Catholics.

Especially the French. What? Britain’s a complicated place.

Visual satire can play this rending-and-mending role because it relies on its viewers to supply the argument themselves. I’ll proceed by example. Caveat emptor: visual satire is notoriously ambiguous, and what follows oversimplifies things a bit. But what’s a man to

do in 750 words?

When the British cartoonist William Hogarth created his etching “The Sleepy Congregation,” which depicts a preacher so focused on his notes that he has yet to notice his flock falling into a languid stupor, he didn’t single out any particular party for criticism.

Everyone in “The Sleepy Congregation,” from the priest, to the laity, to the parish clerk eyeing the

exposed cleavage of a sleeping woman in the foreground, is an exaggerated type, easily recognized by the astute spectator. The critical question, Haynes stressed, is this: What was Hogarth asking his viewers to believe about real clerics, clerks and Christians?

Hogarth could predict the responses of his audience. He knew that he could “rend” by accusing the clergy of obliviousness and the

masses of impiety. But he could at the same time “mend” by suggesting a comparison between the real world and that of “The Sleepy Congregation.” The argument is all in this off-screen work.

The satirist asks his viewers “to pick the undepicted,” Haynes said of another cartoon. This one portrayed a fat, pampered “Established Church” and an unkempt, skinny and greasy haired “True Doctrine.” The way out is through the middle.

What does this have to do with René Magritte? We have a tendency to identify images with things.

Magritte’s painting isn’t “a picture of a pipe,” it’s “a pipe.” Caravaggio’s masterpiece isn’t “an image of the calling of St. Matthew,” it’s “The Calling of St. Matthew.”

In Haynes’ words, “We elide images and the things they represent.” Which brings us back to a nugget I unearthed earlier: “Cartoons exaggerate, lie, can be ambiguous, and deliberately omit the truth.”

But they do more than this.

They rely on that split-second identification of image and object to connect lies and exaggerations with the object itself.

If cartoons do work in this way, they provide an almost tragicomic perspective on a central, if disputed tenet of the Abrahamic religions. The prohibition on images (“Thou shalt not make thee any graven image ...”), which is part-and-parcel with the condemnation of idolatry, springs from a consciousness of this same human tendency.

Thus, Charlie Hebdo and Exodus are in agreement: images possess a profound, sometimes terrible, power. It was true then on Mt. Sinai, and it’s true today in Paris.

I was lucky enough to be a student in Dr. Haynes class on “Art and Religion Since the Reformation” during my sophomore year.

The things I took from that class are too many to list here. Instead, I will simply say “Thank you” to Dr. Haynes for all of the good her teaching has done me since.

Writers foretell what’s in new Mumford & Sons album Last Monday, Mumford and Sons announced that they would be releasing a new album, “Wilder Mind,” on May 4. We think we already know what our review will look like.

Abigail LaBounty Variety Editor Conor Fellin Managing Editor The album art for “Wilder Mind” is a good indication of what’s inside. In a change from the urban settings of their previous album covers, the four members of Mumford and Sons are seen galloping across the American prairie on painted horses, holding their instruments aloft and shouting into the wind.

Similarly, the music in “Wilder Mind” lacks any sense of restraint.

Present as always is the upbeat banjo. Present as always is the dramatic buildup. Present as always are the lyrics on love and love lost. Yet “Wilder Mind” somehow manages to take these elements to even greater extremes than its predecessors.

Whereas “Sigh No More” loved to reference literary classics and “Babel” was replete with scriptural allusions, “Wilder Mind” draws its source material from Westerns.

“You’ll shout my name as I ride away,” they rasp on “Ride Away.”

“February Shivers” begins with the lines, “Falling backwards to an outlaw’s death/ Your words ringing like a gunshot in my ear.”

Marcus Mumford does indeed seem to believe that rejection and a gunshot leave similar wounds.

Nowhere is this more evident than

the rage-filled “Six Shooter.” The song is a mixture of “Dust Bowl Dance” and “White Blank Page,” while trying a little too hard to tie together other songs on the album.

With lyrics like “You took my soul, and shot it in the dust, but you left my heart in its place,” and “How can I ride away, without making you pay, pay for the hurt you caused,” the track attempts to instill a sense of loss and anger in the listeners, without ever making it clear what exactly it is they’re supposed to be angry about.

The album is full of guest vocals from folk and country celebrities ranging from EmmyLou Harris to Adam Duritz from Counting Crows. While the talent of these vocalists is (in most cases) beyond dispute, the band runs into issues when Marcus Mumford attempts to out-shout his guests on the choruses. I really would have liked to have actually heard Jeff Tweedy singing about a gunfight between God and Satan, thank you very much.

The album’s big surprise is its title track, a twelve-minute art-rock jam. “Tombs of tomes/ Elephant bones/ Dying telephones,” Marcus Mumford mumbles against a squealing steel guitar and muted drums.

The song’s penultimate movement is a three-minute instrumental consisting entirely of air being let out of dodgeballs through punctures of varying sizes.

The track ends with Mumford suddenly snapping back into character and shouting, “Oh, and don’t give up your hope.”

The band really gets down to their roots in the final song of the album “Prairie Winds.” At first, you get the feeling that you’re in for a bluegrass tribute, but boy are

Elias Brinkman / Collegian

This may not be the leaked album cover, but I think we can all agree it should be.

you wrong. The track consists of a four minute banjo solo overlaid with Marcus Mumford singing “ah. Ah ah. Ah ah ah ah,” at various pitches and speeds. The banjo is at times intermixed with wild fiddling that moves in and out of time with the music.

In this track, Mumford’s voice evokes images of falling leaves, frozen ground, blooming prairie

roses and the unrelenting heat of the summer, all wrapped up in the seasons of love and loss we feel growing up and leaving our family, finding a partner to spend our lives with, moving in and out of friend groups. The final “Ah” takes the listener slowly into the ultimate, unavoidable embrace of death.

Writers’ Note: Since writing this article, we have discovered that album art and a track listing for “Wilder Mind” has already been leaked, proving many of our predictions wrong. In the spirit of American discourse, we stand by what we say regardless.

variety

“Map to the Stars” has potential, wastes it on an incoherent plot

the Collegian : 8

9 March 2015

David Cronenberg’s new “Map to the Stars,” is a satirical drama centered on the narcissism of celebrity culture. With all the the makings of a solid film, “Map to the Stars” fails despite its eclectic cast.

Trent Gibbons Student Writer

“Map to the Stars” follows a multitude of washups and wannabes as they desperately claw their way up the social ladder of celebrity-saturated Hollywood Hills.

The director, David Cronenberg, is better known for cult-classic B horror films such as “Videodrone,” “Existenz” and an exceptional remake of “The Fly,” each of which featured a repulsive obsession with mankind’s inherent dependence on our own weak, vulnerable flesh.

Recently he seems to have exchanged his morbid interest in bodily horror for a sort of ‘personality horror.’ After the uniquely human crime studies of “A History of Violence” and “Eastern Promises,” I had some tentative hope for his latest film, despite his lack of experience in the genre. Oh well.

The first two thirds of the film hold up well enough, presenting us with a cast of narcissists from whose self-destruction we can derive some guilty pleasure. The film centers around the Weiss family.

The father, Dr. Stafford Weiss (John Cusack) plays therapist to Los Angeles’ more unstable personalities, while his son Benjie (Evan Bird) tries to recover his career after a bout of rehab, even if it means reprising his role in the comedy series “Bad Babysitter.”

Meanwhile Havana Segrand (Julianne Moore) tries to face her childhood trauma by reprising her mother’s role in an arthouse remake of one of her previous films, but instead finds herself haunted by her mother’s visage.

The casting here is a mixed bag. Child actors are always a little clumsier than their more seasoned coworkers, but Bird has no excuse for the utter lifelessness with which he portrays his supposedly emotionally scarred character. Moore and Cusack provide plenty of talent but are ultimately un-

Courtesy Focus Films

Australian actress Mia Wasikowska plays Agatha Weiss, a hollywood newcomer recently released from a psychiatric ward following treatment for schizophrenia.

able to bail the sinking ship that is the final act of the film.

Maybe the one definite saving grace of the film is found in the eccentric character of Agatha, a starry-eyed newcomer to the Hollywood scene. Had the movie focused solely on the conflicts found in her relationship with her driver Jerome Fontana (Robert Pattinson) and her role as ‘chore-whore’ to Havana Segrand, it might have made for a potent romance that simultaneously exposed the darker side of celebrities.

Instead, whatever promise the film held is lost in the latter half. Some characters act inconsistently, while their arcs are negated entirely. Others disappear from the film without any conclusion.

Poet masterfully comments on race, urban culture

The film seems to beg for its audience’s investment or at-least undivided attention with unjustified fits of ‘action.’ One particular scene, featuring a minor with an ‘unloaded’ gun, while intending to instill a sense of suspense in its viewers, instead had the theater laughing. That we were sad when an animal was shot rather than any of the adolescents on screen is a testament to the characters’ total lack of redeeming qualities.

Another scene has a rather forgettable character engulfed in fiery CGI, the effects befitting a much lower budgeted film. When the credits did roll, it was after a purely inconclusive climax, like the plot had given up rather than choose a viable direction. The absolute incoherence of the final few scenes

has since had me questioning whether the events depicted had even really happened.

I don’t regret watching “Maps to the Stars.” Relative to whatever other mindless explosive blockbuster is going to hit theaters soon, watching actors and actresses squirm under a microscope of cynicism proves a rewarding experience, though guiltily so.

Like most of Cronenberg’s films, it often relies a bit too much on shock value, with characters incessantly uttering vulgarities and exposing themselves to the camera. If this truly is David Cronenberg’s last film, then at least we can observe it in all its unrelenting oddness, a reflection of the man’s flawed, unique biography.

FAST ON OUR

Adam Lux / Collegian

FEET (NOT ON THE STREET)

Tyrone Williams’ poetry focuses on his home town of Detroit, poverty and race issues in America.

Tyrone Williams visited Mcfarlin Library this Thursday for a poetry reading. Williams thoughtfully crafts language into complex, socially conscious poems.

Adam Lux Student Writer Tyrone Williams, a black poet from Detroit, came to TU’s campus for a reading.

Williams is a professor at Xavier University and has published five books of poetry, including “On Spec” (2008), “The Hero Project” (2009) and “Adventures of Pi” (2011).

Much of Williams’ poetry is influenced by his upbringing in Detroit, especially the poverty and racism against African Americans in the city and the US in general.

The faculty lounge in McFarlin Library felt very homey with its large fireplace and soft comfy chairs. The place is filled with books and art, the perfect spot for a poetry reading.

Williams mostly read from his book “On Spec.” Most of this book is about racism and how it is still prevalent in our society within our institutions and politics. He even goes

so far as to name Ohio politicians by name.

Williams’ poetry is complex, not easily understandable. Concrete meaning does not come quickly, but his use of language expertly conveys the feeling of his poetry. One can feel the love for his cities, Detroit and Cincinnati.

One can feel his frustration, sometimes even anger with the fact that racism is still such a big part of our country. One doesn’t need a bunch of background knowledge to feel the power and passion in his poetry. He is a master of language.

Williams stated in an interview that his working class upbringing in Detroit has been a large influence on his poetry. His advice for young poets is to “read everything,” and as a professor he tells his students to “follow your own instincts.”

Williams, in my opinion, is not only a master craftsman but also someone who is working to really improve the community of poetry.

He cares about his own poetry, which is extremely powerful, and how his poetry is affecting the larger poetic community as well as how poetry can be used to improve our society.

SERIOUS DELIVERY!

TM

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TO FIND THE LOCATION NEAREST YOU VISIT JIMMYJOHNS.COM ©2014 JIMMY JOHN’S FRANCHISE, LLC ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

the Collegian : 9

9 March 2015

William “Billy” Clark @TownCrya

@Confederacy attacking @Union troops at Fort Sumter #CivilWar #Secession #Lincoln1864

William “Billy” Clark @TownCrya

@NancyFromTucket Saw your husband with another lady. How’re things at home? #affair

What should you be able to say in public?

What’s private on social media?

Join a panel of TU faculty, Collegian staffers and professional journalists as they consider these and other questions that rise out of the Collegian’s recent stories on the Trey Barnett case.

Thursday, March 12, noon; Zink Hall, Classroom C All faculty, staff and students welcome to attend Sponsored by the Faculty of Communication and the Collegian

commentary

the Collegian: 10

9 March 2015

FCC’s decision on net neutrality is best for all

Recently, the FCC reclassified internet service providers, helping content providers and consumers.

Sam Beckmann Student Writer On February 26, 2015, the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) classified internet service providers, (ISPs) as Title II Common Carriers. So what does this mean for net neutrality? Well, first let’s

them almost non-existent. With the lack of competition, there is little incentive to improve the service provided by the ISP, and as such has led to many complaints by customers about ISP’s customer service, prices, and unfair fees tacked onto bills.

The concept of net neutrality specifically deals with one practice that can extorted by a monopolistic company. ISPs are charging content providers, such as Netflix and Youtube, outrageous fees to ensure that their data is “streamlined through” the network to the users.

This introduces a number of new problems: First, ISPs are now doubledipping, charging both the content providers and the content consumers extra in order to ensure that data gets through successfully, something that they are being paid to do in the first place.

Secondly, there’s an issue with how the data could be “streamlined through” the

as common carriers are considered to be utilities, and have all the benefits and restrictions of such.

Since the FCC decision, there has been much discussion that being a Title II Common Carrier ensures that companies will not be allowed to have paid privatization, which essentially ensures net neutrality.

This is not the only benefit of broadband being considered a utility though.

With the reclassification of ISPs, they now get to go through the process of using public utility lines. As an example, consider the electric grid. If electricity was not considered a utility, many companies could be trying to provide electricity to nearby homes.

In order to do this, each company would have to build its own poles to run wires into

the homes. Over time, this system would result in the sides of roads being cluttered with many different sets of wires. In order to solve this, the government only lets specific companies build wires.

This creates a natural monopoly, but the tradeoff for getting this monopoly is government regulation, ensuring no pricegouging or ridiculous practices are used by the electric companies. With ISPs now being utilities, it is no longer necessary for all ISPs to build all of their infrastructure underground, which makes the process of expanding a network much more affordable.

In turn, this lowers the cost necessary for a new ISP to begin to establish its foothold.

All things considered, the choice of making ISPs Title II Common Carriers results in a better internet for everyone.

Making ISPs Title II Common Carriers results in a better internet for everyone. take a brief review on what net neutrality actually is, and what a Title II Common Carrier is.

Net neutrality, put quite simply, is the practice of treating all data equally. So whether you’re trying to stream Netflix, play a game online, or simply browse webpages, your ISP brings you the data at the same rate You can’t be charged extra to have certain websites load faster. As the internet has grown in size, this has become more and more of an issue.

The term “net neutrality” was first introduced in a 2003 paper by Tim Wu. Although most issues were theoretical at that time, issues with not treating all data equally have become incredibly relevant in the past few years.

Due to the nature and expense involved in becoming an ISP, the industry is dominated by a select few companies (Comcast, TimeWarner and Verizon, to name a few). These companies have cooperated to an almostmonopolistic reign over the industry, where in most metropolitan areas, only one ISP is available, making competition between

network. ISPs aren’t really improving their infrastructure (despite being given billions of dollars specifically to do so), so how can they claim to improve the speed at which certain data is being delivered?

By slowing everything else down. In short, the ISPs are essentially blackmailing companies. You either give them a bunch of money, or they’ll slow your service down. This would be equivalent to a phone company charging you extra if you wanted to talk about politics over the phone, otherwise they would introduce a several second-delay.

The same concept applies to the internet.

What data is being transmitted shouldn’t affect the quality of the transmission of that data.

But why can’t a phone company charge you more to talk about politics? Well, phone service is considered a utility, and as such is regulated as a Title II Common Carrier.

Title II is a good thing. It is designed to ensure that utility companies act in the public interest, providing a fair environment for competition to flourish. Services treated

Sam Beckmann/Collegian

Paid privatization would allow internet service providers to vary connection speed based upon the amount paid by content providers. Net neutrality ensures all data gets the same treatment.

The Collegian says “Thank you”

Just off the Creek Turnpike between Aspen and Elm in Broken Arrow WarrenTheatres.com

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Movie Line (918) 893-9798

These have been interesting times here at the Collegian. Our story about Trey Barnett’s suspension rocked the boat a little more than we were used to, but with a couple of weeks between us and that story, we decided that it’s time to thank those organizations that picked up the story or supported us in other ways.

First, we’d like to thank the Student Press Law Center and the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education. The SPLC went to bat for us with TU’s lawyer and helped us gather as much information as possible about the administration’s beliefs and intentions.

FIRE was in the thick of things before we even got involved. We’d like to thank the people at FIRE who did what they could to defend Barnett from an unfair suspension.

FIRE and the SPLC publicized both the unfair treatment of Barnett at the hands of TU administrators and attempts by TU to intimidate the Collegian.

Several national news organizations picked up the story as well. Stories ran on Huffington Post, Inside Higher Ed and Bloomberg Businessweek, which gets the award for best headline: “University of Tulsa Creates ‘Atmosphere of Fear’ to Silence Criticism, Students Say.” We’d like specifically to thank Dan

Reimold, of College Media Matters, for writing the Huffington Post piece and Natalie Kitroeff for the Bloomberg piece.

So far, we remain puzzled by the lack of local media involvement. The University of Tulsa is a major stakeholder in the Tulsa community. Perhaps more importantly: it makes no small difference to prospective students how TU treats those who are already here.

But we’re encouraged by the response of student journalists across the country.

Editorials and opinion pieces were published in the OU Daily (University of Oklahoma), the Daily Toreador (Texas Tech) and Chips (Luther College). Thanks for the show of solidarity.

Here in Tulsa, the most helpful members of our support network were Dan Bewley, the Collegian’s advisor, and Mark Brewin, Chair of Communication. Thanks to you guys.

Finally, many thanks to everyone who read the Collegian that week. All Best, Kyle Walker Editor-in-chief Conor Fellin Managing Editor

9 March 2015

Commentary

the Collegian: 11

DoJ report leaves St. Louis County in limbo

The Department of Justice’s report on Ferguson revealed many frightening practices in the police department.

Conor Fellin Managing Editor The DoJ’s decision documented systematic abuses on the part of the Ferguson Police Department and Ferguson Municipal Court, as well as repeated discrimination on the part of both institutions. Here are a few of the more frightening quotes from the report:

Courtesy Etefia M. Umana

Police in Ferguson wait for protestors on August 13, 2014 during the Michael Brown protests. The killing of Michael Brown by a Ferguson Police officer brought national attention to the police department’s practices and caused the Department of Justice to investigate Ferguson’s law enforcement practices.

If the Department of Justice is acting in character, it will follow through on its decision finding Ferguson guilty of unconstitutional law enforcement. What is less certain is how the decision will affect similar practices in surrounding counties.

Conor Fellin Managing Editor This Wednesday the United States Department of Justice (DoJ) released a hundred-page report finding the Ferguson Police Department (FPD) guilty of unconstitutional law enforcement practices.

The report revealed that the FPD saw revenue generation, not public safety, as its main goal; that it issued baseless fines and did so disproportionately to African Americans; that it abused force (particularly tasers and police dogs) and did so disproportionately to African Americans; that the municipal court system placed an unnecessary burden on defendants, particularly by issuing arrest warrants for failure to pay fines; and that discretionary power was abused across the board to hurt African Americans.

Now that the DoJ has publicized its opinion, the FPD will be faced with three choices: accept DoJ reforms, disband or face lawsuit. If the FPD did accept DoJ reforms, the police department would be monitored by the DoJ over the course of seven years as it gutted its current system at its own expense.

Regardless of what Ferguson chooses to do, one huge question remains: what will happen to the rest of St. Louis County?

While the DoJ did not collect data on racial profiling for other St. Louis municipalities, it did find that the culture of superfluous fining to generate revenue is common to St. Louis County.

Even if other St. Louis municipalities do not engage in racial profiling (a

dubious proposition), such a system would unnecessarily burden poorer residents, as they do not have the disposable income to pay fines and cannot always get off of work to appear in municipal court. The DoJ report acknowledges this.

And in a press conference announcing the report, Attorney General Eric Holder said he would “engage with the city of Ferguson— and surrounding municipalities—to reform their law enforcement practices.”

Yet except in reference to one specific Missouri State Law, the DoJ’s decision never asks a single institution other than the FPD to reform. Furthermore, it doesn’t seem like FPD even has the power to cause change in a municipality other than Ferguson based on this investigation.

So where does this leave residents of Ferguson? Even if the FPD were to be completely reformed, Ferguson residents would only have to walk a few miles from their houses in order to be subject to an indistinguishably crippling system of law enforcement. It would be a small improvement indeed.

More importantly, what happens to African Americans throughout St. Louis, a city defined by gentrification, segregation and abusive law enforcement on a deep level?

The DoJ was correct in its findings against Ferguson. But St. Louis County cannot get complacent just because those bad guys at FPD were firmly scolded. St. Louis, we’ve got a lot of work to do.

“Issuing three or four charges in one stop is not uncommon in Ferguson. Officers sometimes write six, eight, or, in at least one instance, fourteen citations for a single encounter.”

(Captain of the Patrol Division on how to deal with officers that are not assigning enough citations:) “Regardless of the seniority and experience take the officer out of the cover car position and assign them to prisoner pick up and bank runs...Failure to perform can result in disciplinary action not just a bad evaluation.”

“SROs (School Resource Officers) told us that they viewed increased arrests in the schools as a positive result of their work.”

“In Ferguson, officers will sometimes make an arrest without writing a report or even obtaining an incident number, and hundreds of reports can pile up for months without supervisors reviewing them.”

“Nearly 90 percent of documented force used by FPD officers was used against African Americans.”

“In every canine bite incident for which racial information is available, the subject was African American.”

“During the last three years, the court imposed roughly one Failure to Appear charge per every two citations or summonses issued

by FPD.” (Failure to Appear charges place people in jail for not appearing in court in relation to otherwise non-jailable offenses.)

“We have heard repeated reports, and found evidence in court records, of people appearing in court many times—in some instances on more than ten occasions—to try to resolve a case but being unable to do so,

Police block a man from returning home in Ferguson in August 2014 during the Mike Brown protests.

and subsequently having additional fines, fees, and arrest warrants issued against them.”

“We spoke with one woman who, in addition to owing several hundred dollars in fines to Ferguson, also owed fines to the municipal courts in Jennings and Edmundson.

In total, she owed over $2,500 in fines and fees, even after already making over $1,000 in payments and clearing cases in several other municipalities. This woman’s case is not unique.”

“Because of the large number of municipalities in the region, many of which have warrant practices similar to Ferguson, it is not unusual for a person to be arrested by one department, have outstanding warrants pending in other police departments, and be handed off from one department to another until all warrants are cleared. We have heard of individuals who have run out of money during this process … and as a result were detained for a week or longer.”

“We (DoJ) spoke with one AfricanAmerican man who, in August 2014, had an argument in his apartment to which FPD officers responded, and was immediately pulled out of the apartment by force. After telling the officer, ‘you don’t have a reason to lock me up,’ he claims the officer responded: “N*****, I can find something to lock you up on.’ When the man responded, ‘good luck with that,’ the officer slammed his face into the wall, and after the man fell to the floor, the officer said, ‘don’t pass out motherf****r because I’m not carrying you to my car.’”

“In one instance, a woman called FPD to report a domestic disturbance. By the time the police arrived, the woman’s boyfriend had left. The police looked through the house and saw indications that the boyfriend lived there. When the woman told police that only she and her brother were listed on the home’s occupancy permit, the officer placed the woman under arrest for the permit violation and she was jailed.”

Courtesy Etefia M. Umana

Why alienate non-English speakers?

Bill would outlaw bilingual education, non-English permit tests, and more.

Conor Fellin Managing Editor A bill (SB 522) is going before the Okla.

Senate seeking to restrict support for nonEnglish languages within the state. The bill is authored by Sen. Ralph Shortey (R-Oklahoma City).

In a few of its several provisions, the bill prohibits officials from providing examinations for drivers or occupational licenses in non-English languages, bans “bilingual or bicultural education programs,” and requires that state agencies include expenses for supporting non-English languages in a separate section of their budget.

Though it does little to help the state prepare for these situations, the bill does acknowledge that there are some situations where Okla. needs to support non-English languages. Like when it’s dealing with its

Native American population, and … uhm … when it’s dealing with its Native American population again.

Seriously, Oklahoma’s Hispanic population is completely absent from bill, probably because it is the bill’s intended target.

released an official resolution decrying the so-called “English-only” movement.

“History shows that a common language cannot be imposed by force of law,” said the resolution, “and that attempts to do so usually create divisiveness and disunity.”

But I get ahead of myself. Let’s take a few of the bill’s arguments at face value.

First of all, news outlets like KTUL are quick to point out that the bill is simply implementing a 2010 amendment to the Okla.

Constitution making English the official language of the state. Why Ralph Shortey would consider an amendment elevating the status of English incomplete unless it also restricts the use of other languages is beyond me.

Second, the bill also claims that “use of a common language … helps to unify the people of this state and the United States.”

This is an old argument, and it’s an argument that’s been discredited for quite some time. In 1986, when the newly formed lobbying organization U.S. English was pressuring states to adopt English as their official language, the American Linguistic Association

Now for the real question: what effect will this bill have on non-English-speaking communities in Oklahoma (i.e. exclusively Native Americans)? They’ll find barriers to running a business and to driving (don’t tell me the amount of English you need to read street signs is even close to the amount you need to pass a written exam). Each of these factors will make it significantly harder to make a living in America.

They will not be able to send their children to public bilingual schools (presumably, these schools teach English and Cherokee).

If they are lucky, their children will be able to attend another English language learner program that has demonstrated effectiveness, but even then the burden will fall squarely on the community to preserve its own culture.

And worst of all, they can count on sub-

“A common language cannot be imposed by force of law.”

stantially fewer government organizations to provide them with support in a non-English language, since anyone who does so must say it in a special section of their budget. In a state that will do anything but raise taxes to balance the budget, having a separate list of translation-related expenses could cause an agency to be targeted for funding cuts.

Count on it to deter agencies from spending the money they need to in order to support non-English languages.

The communities that will suffer from SB 522 are people who identify as Oklahomans.

Most of them have lived in Oklahoma for a substantial portion of their lives. Our communities would not look the same without their presence enriching them. You cannot talk about “Oklahoma’s culture” without talking about them.

These Oklahomans are feeling pressure to learn English from their community and from the private institutions that drive Oklahoma’s economy. This is reasonable.

What’s not reasonable is for a policy maker to dictate that these Oklahomans undertake the lengthy process of learning English in order to participate in the state’s public institutions on even a basic level.

Ralph Shortey, who do you think you are?

Sports

the Collegian : 12

Where will they play? Free agency opens

The NFL offseason continues with the opening of free agency. We look at some of the top names entering the market and predict where they might land.

Joey Byron Student Writer

With free agency right around the corner for the NFL, I will start to look at the top players that are looking for new homes.

Free agency sparks the excitement of a new year and a new chance to get the Lombardi trophy. If you weren’t a fan of the New England Patriots, then last season was a disappointment. The beginning of free agency is the time to start looking at what your team needs in order to have a fighting chance next season. There are some big name players that are potentially going to hit the open market. The teams that want difference makers will have to pay top dollar, but typically the talent is worth the expense.

Ndamukong Suh (DT): One of the biggest names to hit free agency in recent years. He will be an immediate asset to any team that signs him. Teams like the Broncos and the Patriots could use help on defensive

line. However, they don’t have the cap room right now to sign such a pricey player.

Suh will most likely end up on a team with more cap space such as the Dolphins or the Raiders.

Devin McCourty (S): Has really hit his stride after transitioning from cornerback.

The Rutgers’ alumnus is coming off of a great season with the Patriots as one of their leaders. He has said that he prefers being in New England. I wouldn’t be surprised if he took a pay cut to stay with Belichick in Foxboro.

Julius Thomas (TE): The Broncos former tight end will be looking for a new home, hopefully one that has a quarterback with qualities similar to Peyton Manning, which will be hard to do. He is an incredible passing threat that can help any offense that has a capable quarterback. Some possible destinations for him would be Oakland or Atlanta. Both Derek Carr and Matt Ryan could use another option down field.

Randall Cobb (WR): Another player that I could see re-signing with his former team. The Packers would have a hard time replacing him if he were to sign with another club. Cobb and Edelman are at the top of the slot receiver category in the NFL. If Green Bay did let Cobb slip to another team then

it could quite possibly be Oakland. The Raiders could offer a very large contract to him all while seeing what Carr is capable of with an extremely talented receiver.

Demarco Murray (RB): Coming off a terrific season is the best strategy for any player going into a final contract year, which is just what Murray did. He had an electric start to the season, but didn’t have quite as strong of a finish that some would have expected. Despite this he still won Offensive Player of the Year and will be looking to sign big somewhere. Dallas could still franchise tag him which may be their only option to be able to hold on to him. If Dallas doesn’t tag him, then he could possibly end up in Indianapolis or Arizona.

Arizona needs a spark for their offense and Indianapolis would love to pair Murray with Andrew Luck.

It is always interesting to see where free agents actually end up. Most are drawn to where they can make the most money. Then there are those who are looking for teams most capable of winning a championship.

Hopefully evaluating these top potential free agents has gotten you excited for the rest of the offseason and more importantly for opening kickoff 2015.

free throws—they are supposed to be free points. When you aren’t even making half of your free throws then something needs to be done. If Tulsa shoots 60–70 percent, it’s a whole different game. Missed free-throws kill momentum.

Trailing by seven to start off the second half, the Hurricane hoped to gain momentum, bringing it within five early, only to see the Bearcats score six straight to take a double-digit lead. Tulsa was able to keep pace, but fell after Cincinnati scored six of their last ten free throws to win by nine. Rashad Ray and James Woodard led the Hurricane with 15 and 12 points respectively.

Coach Frank Haith had this to say on the loss: “(The Bearcats) were really aggressive and physical. When you play a team that has physical guys, particularly a post-up game, our goal was to try and take something away. They did a good job of throwing it out of the post and (Francis) Cobb had one of those nights.

“We left a lot of points out there. When you play a team that’s really good defensively, as they are, you can’t leave points out there. I think we left a lot of bunnies around the basket that I thought we missed. Also on the free throw line we missed opportunities like that to score. Against a good defensive team you need to score.”

Tulsa traveled to Dallas with the confer-

ence title on the line, against the team that handed Tulsa its first conference loss of the season. For the winner, the thrill of being the sole American Athletic Conference regular season champion. The loser settles for second and a strong tournament seeding.

The Golden Hurricane played a much stronger game against the Mustangs compared to their previous match up, but it was not enough to carry them over SMU, who won 67–62. James Woodard set a Tulsa record with 10 three-pointers in the game, putting up nearly half of the Hurricane’s overall points.

With the two losses, the Golden Hurricane is dangerously close to being out of the NCAA Tournament, with many analysts predicting Tulsa to be one of the first four out. The easiest road to the tournament for Tulsa now is to win the automatic berth by taking home the American Athletic Conference Tournament title.

The road to the AAC title is not an easy one. First would come the winner of Tulane vs. Houston game, followed by the winner of (most likely) UConn vs. Cincinnati. Finally the Hurricane would need to beat the Mustangs in Hartford to take the title. The Hurricane are going to need to beat at least two of the teams they lost to in order to win the AAC tournament. Their first game will be on Friday at 7 p.m.

of the Los Angeles Dodgers. The new move makes the Dodgers only the third team to be affiliated with Tulsa, following the Texas Rangers (1977–2002) and the Rockies (2003–2014).

The Drillers were a popular choice for re affiliation, due to good facilities and high attendance (Tulsa was fourth among all Double-A teams in attendance last year). Other potential teams that could have taken the Drillers were the Arizona Diamondbacks and the Minnesota Twins, as well as the possibility of re-signing with the Rockies.

These affiliations work through what are

called “Player Development Contracts,” agreements between the major league team and the minor league team’s ownership.

The minor league ownership handles the business aspect of the deal, handling things such as ticket prices and promotions. Meanwhile, the major league team handles the issues of the coaching staff and the team itself.

The Dodgers also signed the Oklahoma City Redhawks to be a Triple-A affiliate. It will be the first time in thirteen years that both Oklahoma teams share the same affiliation.

Basketball falls to Cincy, SMU; takes second place in conference

The Golden Hurricane was playing for first in both games this past week. Unfortunately, it fell short and finished in second.

Matt Rechtien Sports Editor

Needing to win at least one of their next two games, the Hurricane dropped its games against Cincinnati and SMU, taking second place in the conference as a result.

On Wednesday the Hurricane, needing a win to guarantee at least a share of the American title, hosted the Bearcats. This was the first matchup of the season between the two, as Cincinnati is the team that Tulsa only played once this season.

The Bearcats were able to battle to a 5–4 lead early in the first half, and never lost the lead after that. The Golden Hurricane was only able to get as close as three in the second half before they fell 56–47 at home.

The Hurricane starters struggled against the Bearcats, shooting only 5–22 in the first half. Cincinnati had the advantage in size, which made it harder for the Golden Hurricane to get into any kind of rhythm.

The biggest struggle for the Golden Hurricane was the inconsistency on the freethrow line, shooting only 30 percent for the game. There is a reason why they are called

Drillers enter new year with new faces

You might not recognize your favorite Drillers this year, since after changing affiliation, the Drillers will have all new players.

Wade Crawford Sports Editor

With the new season of Tulsa Drillers baseball, expect to see some unfamiliar faces—twenty-five of them, to be exact.

The Tulsa Drillers have ended their 12-year partnership with the Colorado Rockies and have instead become the Double-A affiliate

‘Cane Calendar March 9–22 Monday, March 9 Men’s Golf @ Tiger Invitational; Opelika, AL; All Day

Saturday, March 14 Softball vs. Texas Tech; Lubbock, TX; 3 p.m.

Softball vs. Mississippi Valley; Lubbock, TX; 5:30 p.m.

Track @ NCAA Indoor Championships; Fayetteville, AR; All Day Women’s Golf @ Notre Dame Clover Cup; Mesa, AZ; All Day

Tuesday, March 10 Softball vs. Arkansas; Fayetteville, AR;

5 p.m.

Men’s Golf @ Tiger Invitational; Opelika, AL; All Day

Wednesday, March 11 Men’s Soccer vs. Tulsa Roughnecks;

Hurricane Stadium; 7:30 p.m.

Sunday, March 15 Softball vs. Mississippi Valley;

Lubbock, TX; 11 a.m.

Men’s Tennis vs. Ohio State; Case Tennis Center; 1 p.m Women’s Golf @ Notre Dame Clover

Cup; Mesa, AZ; All Day

Thursday, March 12 Men’s Basketball @ AAC Tournament;

Hartford, CT; TBA (thru Sunday)

Friday, March 13 Softball vs. Mississippi Valley;

Lubbock, TX; 12:30 p.m.

Men’s Tennis vs. Michigan; Case Tennis Center; 5 p.m Softball vs. Texas Tech; Lubbock, TX; 5:30 p.m.

Women’s Golf @ Notre Dame Clover Cup; Mesa, AZ; All Day Track @ NCAA Indoor Championships; Fayetteville, AR; All Day

Tuesday, March 17 Softball vs. North Texas; Denton, TX; 2 p.m.

Men’s Tennis @ Oracle Invite; Indian

Wells, CA; TBA Wednesday, March 18 Softball vs. Iowa; Collins Family Softball Complex; 4 p.m.

Men’s Tennis @ Oracle Invite; Indian

Wells, CA; TBA Women’s Tennis @ UCF; Orlando, FL

Thursday, March 19 Men’s Tennis @ Oracle Invite; Indian

Wells, CA; TBA Men’s Golf @ Desert Shootout; Goodyear, AZ; All Day Friday, March 20 Women’s Tennis @ USF; Tampa, FL; TBA Men’s Golf @ Desert Shootout;

Goodyear, AZ; All Day Men’s Tennis @ Oracle Invite; Indian

Wells, CA; TBA Saturday, March 21 Softball vs. Memphis; Collins Family

Softball Complex; 1 p.m.

Softball vs. Memphis; Collins Family

Softball Complex; 3 p.m.

Men’s Golf @ Desert Shootout; Goodyear, AZ; All Day Track @ Tulsa Duels; Tulsa, OK; All Day Sunday, March 22 Softball vs. Memphis; Collins Family

Softball Complex; 12 p.m.

Women’s Rowing vs. Kansas State; Ca

toosa, OK; TBA

9 march 2015

Jesse Keipp is…

El organismo de radiodifusión Landon Donovan is one fly guy. The recently retired MLS and World Cup star has begun his MLS broadcasting career on Friday night in a match up between the Chicago Fire and the Los Angeles Galaxy. Because Donovan can’t help but impress, he made his MLS broadcasting debut on Univision. For those who don’t mindlessly scroll through the cable channels at 3:00 a.m., Univision is entirely in Spanish. Spitting some slick Spanish, Donovan seamlessly fit in with the rest of the native-speaking cast.

Even as a rookie broadcaster and speaking a second language, Donovan out-broadcasted veterans Dick Vitale and Bill Walton, who both made some eye-opening remarks last weekend. After the NCAA levied a ninegame suspension on and stripped 108 wins from Syracuse basketball head coach Jim Boeheim, Dick Vitale rushed to the coach’s defense.

The NCAA found several instances in the past decade of Boeheim’s players receiving academic favors and cash from Syracuse boosters. In a not-at-all biased fashion, Vitale unabashedly defended his friend Boeheim, who was guilty of one thing: “trust.” Yes, Vitale claimed that Boeheim merely trusted those around him too much. Conveniently, Vitale makes no mention of how the illegal incentives enticed better players to attend Syracuse, boosting Boeheim’s win total.

While announcing a basketball game between UCLA and USC, Bill Walton had some interesting insights into milking cows.

Dave Pasch, the play-by-play announcer, incredulously challenged the cow-milking expertise of Walton, a San Diego native.

After mentioning his coverage of games in cow-filled Wisconsin, Walton defended himself by saying, “I have milked a cow before. And I have been milked.”

Let’s just say Pasch held a moment of silence, and it wasn’t in memoriam. However, Pasch has come to expect the unexpected from Walton, who routinely delivers on-air gems, such as rants about the War on Drugs and talking Bob Dylan for three straight minutes.

The greatest dunk in history Congratulations! You’ve finally made it, despite all the critics and naysayers. You proved your haters, friends, parents, exgirlfriends and snarky cat wrong. Mr. Mittens, that intolerable feline, has always hated your guts. Although you stand at only 5-foot-9, you’ve made it to the show: the Philippine Basketball Association. Sure, it’s not the NBA, but two of the letters are still the same. Sixty-six percent NBA is better than no NBA. Nonetheless, here you are at the PBA Slam Dunk Contest.

“Suck it, Mr. Mittens,” you mutter spitefully yet justifiably.

Now is the time to unleash THE dunk; yes, it is the one that is so beautiful that even you are not worthy to watch. Consequently, you don a blindfold lest you see the face of God. Starting just beyond the three-point line, you take off at a blistering pace. Your black Air Jordans compress with each step, supporting the weight of the living legend that is you.

With an effortless bend in the knees, you propel yourself upward. The Wright brothers have nothing on you, because YOU are the inventor of flight. Because of the blindfold, you’re not certain, but you think you hear the sounds of birds chirping beneath you. The wind and cheering fans simultaneously envelop your ears.

Rapidly, you uncork your arms, viciously unleashing your divine dunk. Suddenly, something is amiss. Your hand, descending to smite the rim below, finds no rim at all.

Forcefully, your Air Jordans return to the hardwood court with a forceful and futile thud. Removing the blindfold, you find that you stand well outside the restricted arc, nowhere near the basket. The voracious crowd goes silent, with the exception of a few unrestrained laughs.

“Someone must have told a joke,” you delusionally tell yourself.

How did everything go so, so wrong? You burned the right candles, sacrificed the right goats, yet you failed to land THE dunk. You begin to think that Mr. Mittens was right— you’re not PBA material, you don’t belong on the same court as legendary PBA MVP June Mar Fajardo. Nonetheless, as quickly as the gloomy clouds of doubt had descended, you remember that you are Justin freakin’ Melton.

One “bad” dunk (with six inches of air) will never define your legacy. Next year, you shall return stronger than ever; you will show the plebeians. Oh, will they see how great you are!* *Since the video of the miffed dunk was picked up by the likes of CNN, Melton revealed that the dunk was a joke. While I admire Melton’s alleged self-deprecation, this makes for a much better story if we don’t buy Melton’s claim.

Sports

9 march 2015

the Collegian : 13

#9

Game 1 3:30 p.m.

ESPNU

Game 4 Noon ESPN2

#8

Courtesy Wikipedia

#1 #5

Game 8 3 p.m.

ESPN2

Game 5 2 p.m.

ESPN2

# 10

#4

Game 2 6 p.m.

ESPNews

Game 10 3:15 p.m.

ESPN

Game 6 7 p.m.

ESPNU

#7

#2

# 11

Game 9 5 p.m.

ESPN2

Game 3 8 p.m.

ESPNews Game 7 9 p.m.

ESPNU

#6 #3

All times are CDT ricane made some positive strides and are in a good place. Truthfully, it was great just to be on the water with perfect weather after three very cold weeks. We also enjoyed the competitive atmosphere of having KU in Catoosa and we appreciate them making the trip.”

Women’s soccer wins two The women’s soccer team opened up their spring season this past week in Dallas, beating Northwestern State and North Texas in the opening double-header. The women will play at home this Saturday against Northeastern State before traveling to Norman, to take on OU on Saturday night.

Spring football begins This past Sunday the Golden Hurricane football team began their first of fifteen spring practices. Three of these will occur before Spring Break, with the remain ing 12 leading up to the Annual Spring Game on April 18. Montgomery had this to say: “Our guys worked extremely hard in our off-season conditioning workouts, and now it’s time to get on the field and install our system. . . . We’re looking forward to having the opportunity to put them through our drills and get involved in our schemes, as well as being able to evaluate our strengths and weaknesses on both sides of the ball.”

Rowing The women’s rowing team opened up their season with a scrimmage against the University of Kansas in Catoosa, Okla. on Friday and Saturday. The first day consisted of time trials to determine lineup and work on racing skills. Saturday’s event, four 1500 meter pieces (races).

The Tulsa 1st Varsity 8+ and Tulsa 2nd Varsity 8+ won the first three pieces, with Kansas coming from behind to win the final piece. “All in all it was a very strong weekend for both our teams,” head coach Kevin Harris said. “I felt the Golden Hur-

Tennis The women’s tennis team fell to the Owls of Rice 4–0 on Sunday afternoon. The women struggled to gain any traction against the Owls. Their record sits at 9–7 for the season. The men’s team fell to UCLA 5–0 in California, after beating USC and Pepperdine. Or Ram-Harel was named the American Athletics Conference Tennis Player of the Week for his contribution to TU’s historic win over USC, beating the sixth best player in the country, Yannick Hanfmann.

Softball splits New Mexico The Golden Hurricane softball team split the New Mexico State Round Robin this weekend, crushing North Dakota 18–3 and falling to New Mexico State 12–10.

In their first game against North Dakota, all ten TU players scored with junior Kaitlin Allen and freshman Shelby Estocado both driving in three as Hurricane mercied North Dakota in only five innings. Against New Mexico State, the Hurricane were forced to attempt a late rally, down 12–8 in the seventh. After Estocado hit a two-run homer, to bring the score within two, the next two Golden Hurricane batters were retired, ending the late bid. Tulsa will return to action on Tuesday in Arkansas.

Clark sixth Player of the Year Ashley Clark was named the American Athletic Conference Women’s Basketball Sixth Player of the Year, as well as being named to the all-conference second team.

Clark started in just 15 out of 29 games, but still tallied 24 double-digit points games, six double-digit rebounding efforts and six double-doubles.

Women upset in Uncasville The Golden Hurricane women’s basketball team was upset by Tulane in the American Athletic Conference Tournament on Saturday 71–53. Ashley Clark led the Golden Hurricane with 23 points, including 19 in the second half. Tulsa was the third seed in the conference and Tulane the sixth.

With the loss the Hurricane’s record sits at 17–13 and the chances at making it into the NCAA tournament on March 16 look slim at best.

Yoga on the New U

March 11, 2015 5:00 p.m. – 5:30 p.m.

On Chapman Commons (The New U)

9 March 2015

The State-Run Media

the

State-Run media A “student” “news” “paper”

Gabriel Garcia Marquez covers lunch at TU, sees some shit We asked Gabriel Garcia Marqez to follow Managing Editor Conor Fellin around in ACAC for an hour and report on what he saw. Let’s just say Marquez took some serious liberties.

Gabriel Garcia Marquez Mysterious Man

When Conor Fellin was on his deathbed many years later, he would remember the day the phantoms came to ACAC. Conor was at the back of the Benvenuto’s line, a long line even by the restaurant’s standards. He yearned for the sticky feel of a cream-embalmed noodle slipping down his throat, and as he waited in line, memories of the pasta blended together with memories of cool childhood evenings spent on his neighbors’ swing set.

He looked around at the crowd.

Some were hunched over their meals, more turned away from the community at large than turned towards their table-mates. Some looked anxiously about the atrium, as if every other face in that room were probing them, searching for something to find lacking.

Conor saw a few faces he knew.

Molly Sislo, who had let the wanderers that would disclose neither their names nor their origins squat in her apartment, was laughing with Colby Buchanan, who, though twenty-two years old, had

not aged since 3 p.m. on his sixteenth birthday. Jeremy the Anxious was drumming his fingers against the counter of Sushi Blu while the person in front of him paid.

Then it happened. A vast crowd began trickling in from the south doors. Every former TU student was stopping by to visit this new hub of campus activity.

Students from a time when TU made its home in Muskogee conversed guardedly with recent alums who still expected the school to be the same. Two youths debated philosophy spiritedly, neither aware that the one would grow up to be the other’s professor. A few of the youngest alumni tried to start conversations with friends still attending TU, and they met mixed success.

Some current students engaged the phantoms (that was what Conor would later call them, though no one had dared to actually find out whether or not they had physical form). Some ignored them. Conor watched them quizzically while keeping his place in the Benvenuto’s line.

Before Conor reached the front of the line, the phantoms had dispersed, and those who had not done so already returned to their business.

From that point on there was a silent agreement among the students never to discuss the phantoms, though many would remember them fondly when the University fell upon harder times.

Elias Brinkman / Collegian

Gabriel Garcia Marquez, who appeared serendipitously just as we where thinking of him and disappeared shortly thereafter.

Van Lux takes impressionism to new heights

VInny Van Lux’s MS Paint masterpiece, a copy of “Starry Night,” has received critical acclaim from the State-Run Media, despite being ignored by most mainstream art critics and media outlets.

Vinny Van Lux, a new artistic genius, is sweeping the TU art community with his newest and onlyest work, an MS Paint rendition of “Starry Night,” by Van Gogh.

Adam Lux No Relation

It seems as if TU’s campus has been blessed with a new titan of

the art world in the form of Vinny Van Lux (pronounced van-lou (no relation, I promise)). Van Lux, a sophomore petroleum engineering major, has been receiving critical acclaim from such places as the Internet and his mother, for his newest, and only work, an impressionist style repainting of “Starry Night” by Vincent Van Gogh using MS Paint.

Van Lux stated in an interview that he had “never before tried art

of any kind” and claimed that his inspiration for the piece was that he “got bored one day and thought it couldn’t be that hard to paint like Van Gogh. According to Van Lux the painting took about 15 minutes to finish and really “taught him about what color was.”

I took the piece to TU’s art department and asked some of the faculty about it. Some of the viewers were heard saying “Awww did you little sibling make that,” “It’s

… well, it’s something,” and “It’s very postmodern, but like still really terrible.” You see, my faithful readership, this is exactly why our society should not waste its time on formal art education. Artists spend years studying their medium and practicing their craft and then they have the GALL to think that they’re allowed to have an opinion about other people’s work.

Also art is a useless endeavor and anyone who practices it will

Adam Lux / Collegian

be considered an enemy of the state.

I believe this piece to be one of the greatest paintings of our generation. It is a true testament to the fact that the quality of your work isn’t determined by talent, or practice, or inspiration, but rather if you have friends in positions of power to promote your work and threaten people until they say good things about it. This piece gets the State-Run Media’s A+/10.