October 21st, 2013 Collegian

a student newspaper of the university of tulsa

october 21, 2013 issue 7 ~ volume 99

SA changes funding guidelines

New regulations require that funds be approved after events occur. They also move the funding application deadline and cap projected event attendance.

Kimberly Poff Staff Writer

On Oct. 8, SA Senate passed new funding guidelines, effective immediately. The new guidelines change some of the ways which students apply for funding and SA awards it to them.

These changes came on the heels of an unexpected influx of event sponsorship applications last year. “There wasn’t really a budget crunch,” said SA Treasurer Ben Chong. SA funds had to be reallocated to cover the depleted event sponsorship budget.

The first change involves timing for awarding funding. Under the earlier rules, students applied for and received funding prior to their event based on cost and attendance estimates. This minimized risk to event planners who have to pay out of pocket for food and other items and then be reimbursed

through the business office.

Now students will only receive funding after the event has occurred.

Organizations have been known to overestimate the amount of money they need for an event. Doing so allows them to make sure they can cover all of their expenses.

Unfortunately, the money they do not use stagnates in their accounts for the rest of the year.

While generally this amounts only to $10 or $20 per event, with several hundred events a year, the cumulative surplus can total in the thousands.

The new rules make sure SA reimburses exactly what was spent.

The second change requires organizers to submit an application the day before the event. Previously rules permitted applications to be submitted on the day of the event.

This allows FAC, the committee which handles allocations, to alert orgs to problems with their applications before the day of the event. Most organizations submit their bills several days in advance so details can be ironed out before money is spent.

The third change caps attendance at 250 students per event unless proof of more attendees can be provided. This prevents organizations from inflating projected attendance figures to get disproportionate funding for their events.

The final change which applies to event sponsorship is one regarding events which charge admission. These events must donate 100 percent of proceeds to charity, and they are now required to have a letter from the charity stating the receipt of the donation by the end of the fiscal year.

The other two changes of note involve travel funding. This funding was previously divided into “conference” and “non-conference” travel. The primary difference between the two was whether the trip was open to all students.

Several cases of “non-conference” funding have occurred which were not open to all students in the strictest sense—club sports competitions for instance— but which were deemed good use of SA funds. As such, the categories have been revised to “open” and “closed” travel. Additionally travel applications must be submitted ten days in advance.

UP TO EIGHT WEEKS BEFORE THE EVENT Submit an application requesting SA Funding

Event’s bill goes before Financial Allocations Committee

DAY OF THE EVENT Buy supplies for your event

AFTER THE EVENT Bill is presented to the Senate where organization is approved to receive all, none or any portion of requested funding.

Graphic by Jill Graves

The above graph shows the steps that a student organization must go through to receive SA funding for an event under the new guidelines. The new guidelines prevent bills from being passed by the Senate before the event takes place. Applications must also be submitted the day before the event takes place.

TU Campus Club Watch Terpsichore, ballroom dancing and two-step serve different niches within the TU dancing scene; PERMIAS celebrates Indonesian culture; and fishing club and Academic Bowl provide unique competitive opportunities.

Giselle Willis Steven Buchele Staff Writers

W

ith roughly two-hundred student organizations currently chartered by SA, TU’s clubs cover a wide array of goals, activities and interests.

This week the Collegian will begin a new series profiling some of TU’s student organizations with an article profiling not one, not two, but six student organizations.

Terpsichore

Courtesy Terpsichore

Sophomore Harley Dixon participates in a master class in aerial silks, one of several hosted by Terpsichore. In addition to hosting master classes, Terpsichore organizes flash mobs and Wii Just Dance parties.

Reading Partners Reading can change a child’s life! Become a True Blue Neighbors Reading Partner at Kendall-Whittier Elementary, commit to 1 hour a week and a 45 minute training session and you can be the catalyst to launch a child’s education to a higher level.

Make a Difference Day This is a national event to spotlight community service in your neighborhood. TU will be joining other Kendall-Whittier community partners to clean-up, plant flowers, stripe the parking lot. The date is October 26 from 1 P.M. – 4 P.M. Wear clothes you don’t mind getting dirty and closed-toed shoes.

Terpsichore, the name of the Grecian muse of song and dance, is also the name of one of TU’s dance clubs.

The club’s faculty advisor, Jessica Vokoun, said that Terpsichore was first conceived in 2009 after “several students had organized a dance concert,” and afterwards decided to formalize the event by creating a student club that could “host master classes with guest artists (local and national), as well

as provide opportunities to go see professional dance companies performing in Tulsa.”

Besides these activities, Terpsichore also hosts social events like flash mobs and Wii Just Dance parties.

According to club president Emily Ross, everyone is encouraged to join because “members range anywhere from very little dance experience to classically trained dancers.”

Terpsichore will be holding a dance concert on Jan. 31 and Feb. 1 of 2014 entitled “FLASH: Dance in the Digital Age.”

Ballroom Terpsichore isn’t the only dancing club around. TU’s Ballroom dance club actually originated in the early 2000s, according to member Kimberly Poff, but was only recently reactivated in 2012.

She said that lessons were originally weekly, but that after the group stopped teaching swing/ latin dance, interest waned. Also, “(not) a lot of people showed up to the interest meeting,” said Poff, so the group has been fairly inactive.

However, Poff maintained “people should join because ballroom promotes body awareness, grace and balance. It is also for beginners so everyone is welcome and it’s a great way to meet people.”

See Clubs page 4

Meals on Wheels The Meals on Wheels program provides well over one million meals to seniors who need them each day. Some programs serve meals at congregate locations like senior centers, some programs deliver meals directly to the homes of seniors whose mobility is limited. Volunteers are needed Monday – Friday, volunteer opportunities include site packer/helper, meal deliverers/drivers, site coordinators, office volunteers, van drivers, and many others.

For additional information on volunteer opportunities, contact Kathy Shelton in the True Blue Neighbor Volunteer Center at kathy-shelton@utulsa.edu or call 918-631-3535.

Sports

21 October 2013

the Collegian : 2

MLB best in Fall Classic

Baseball’s best month comes to a head Wednesday night when the Boston Red Sox host the St. Louis Cardinals in game one of the 2013 World Series.

Jesse Keipp Student Writer

Inevitably, dramatic storylines surround the Fall Classic. After 162game seasons and two rounds of playoffs for both the Red Sox and the Cardinals, how could they not?

But this year’s faceoff between two of baseball’s most historic franchises seems to hold more drama than usual.

Who expected the Red Sox to top the American League (AL) after a last place finish in the AL East just a year ago? Who expected the Cardinals to outlast the Reds and yes, even the Pirates, with such a tattered starting rotation?

The Red Sox and Cardinals have arguably been the best franchises in their respective leagues over the past 10 years. The Red Sox just won their third AL pennant in the last decade. The only team with as many or more pennants in the same window is the Cardinals, who claimed their fourth NL title.

Baseball fans might remember that these two met at the 2004 World Series, where the Red Sox swept the Cardinals on the way to ending the Curse of the Great Bambino. However, those 2004 rosters are long gone, as only two players from those teams still remain. DH David Ortiz remains on the Red Sox, even though he is now a shadow of his 2004 self. On the Cardinals, catcher Yadier Molina held a spot on the 2004 roster as a wee rookie and a backup to (now-manager) Mike Matheny.

Notably, both the Red Sox and the Cardinals have had massive

roster turnover since their last titles. Since their last win in 2007, the Red Sox have parted ways with their general manager, Theo Epstein, and their manager, Terry Francona. On the roster, only David Ortiz, speedster Jacoby Ellsbury, cancer survivor Jon Lester and former MVP Dustin Pedroia remain.

While the Cardinals’ last title was a mere two years ago, that team was led by long-gone Albert Pujols. But even more significantly, only six players of the current 25-man roster were on that 2011 championship squad. Carlos Beltran has more or less filled in as Pujols’ offensive replacement, undisputedly outperforming the Anaheim version of Pujols.

To the envy of the rest of the baseball world, the Cardinals’ rookie pitchers have not only replaced but surpassed their veteran counterparts. Starting pitchers Chris Carpenter and Jaime Garcia fell to season-ending injury, and Kyle Lohse fell to the hapless Brewers during the offseason. But St. Louis hasn’t missed them.

At the beginning of the year, highly-touted rookie Shelby Miller beat out fellow youngster Joe Kelly for the last spot in the rotation.

After pitching a one-hitter against the Rockies, Miller was an early candidate for rookie of the year.

Since then, the Cardinals have all but shut down Miller, but Joe Kelly has been stellar the past two months. Rookie Michael Wacha, just one year removed from Texas A&M, has dominated like an ace, twice defeating the best pitcher in baseball, Clayton Kershaw, on his way to earning the NLCS MVP. Despite the loss of closer Jason Motte and the collapse of relievers Mark Rzepczynski and Mitchell Boggs, rookie pitchers have heated up the bullpen, with 100-

mph flamethrowers Trevor Rosenthal and Carlos Martinez. Kevin Siegrist has quietly but dominantly filled a much-needed lefty role.

Since the Red Sox starting pitching staff has been good, not great, with an 11th-ranked ERA, the team’s league-leading offense has carried the Boston squad to the AL’s best record. Scoring 5.27 runs per game, David Ortiz at DH and Mike Napoli at first base has formed a powerful 4-5 punch in the lineup. Furthermore, the team batting average ranked second during the regular season, behind only the Detroit Tigers.

However, since the start of the postseason, pitching has dominated most of the playoffs. The Red Sox are batting .236 in the postseason compared to a staggering .277 in the regular season. Likewise, the Cardinals batting average has dropped to a measly .210 from .269 in the regular season.

Perhaps the Cardinals’ greatest attribute has been its .330 batting average with runners in scoring position. However, this number has dropped to .286 during the postseason—still formidable, but not the clutch hitting that the Cardinals offense has been accustomed to. This may change with the addition of Allen Craig at DH for the Boston games and pinchhitting for the St. Louis games.

Undoubtedly, the Cardinals have ridden their pitching, with timely hitting, to the World Series.

Somehow, the Boston Red Sox offense found a way to defeat one of the strongest rotations in baseball in the Detroit Tigers’ future Cy Young winner, Max Scherzer, and former Cy Young winner, Justin

David Kennedy / Collegian

Little Hooligan

The Hurricane Hooligans, the new soccer supporter group at the University of Tulsa, use buckets as drums to cheer on the women’s soccer team during the game Sunday vs UTEP. The Miners beat the Golden Hurricane 1–0 with the lone goal being scored

by Azia Nicholson. Tulsa’s record fell to 9–6–1 overall and 3–3–1 in Conference-USA play. The team has one home game left on Halloween night vs UTSA.

Verlander. Unfortunately, the Red Sox will be forced to bench either Ortiz or Napoli for the St. Louis games, considering the absence of the DH spot.

Look for pitching to dominate this series, with perhaps a highscoring game or two. But don’t expect a lopsided series. The biggest storyline will be the dangerous Boston lineup vs. St. Louis’s dominating rookie pitchers.

Home field advantage has been very kind to both teams throughout the year, and it certainly helps

the Red Sox to be able to start (and potentially end) the series in Boston.

In the end, I think Michael Wacha continues his dominance on the mound, and Adam Wainwright makes up for having missed the 2011 World Series, while the Red Sox offense struggles when it sits either Napoli or Ortiz. Nonetheless, this series will be a classic. I predict the Cardinals will spray the champagne in Boston after Game Seven.

Staff Picks Who will win the World Series?

St. Louis Cardinals—Will Bramlett, Sports Editor

Boston in four. Again.—J.Christopher Proctor, Editor-in-Chief The what?—Carly Putnam, Copy Editor Football?—Anna Bennett, Satire Editor

Arizona Cardinals—Conor Fellin, News Editor Ralph Lauren—Stephanie Hice, Variety Editor

In an America divided by baseball, nobody wins—Patrick Creedon, Opinion Editor Kyle Walker—Kyle Walker, Managing Editor

M. Soccer

Wed. Oct. 23

vs Kentucky

Lexington, Ky.

Catherine Duininck / Collegian

6 p.m.

Thurs. Oct. 24

W. Tennis M. Tennis

UTSA Clay Courts Champs

UTSA Clay Courts Champs

Orlando, Fla.

All Day

Orlando, Fla.

All Day

Fri. Oct. 25

W. Volleyball W. Soccer W. Tennis M. Tennis

vs Louisiana Tech vs UAB

UTSA Clay Courts Champs

UTSA Clay Courts Champs

Reynolds Center

7 p.m.

Birmingham, Ala.

7:30 p.m.

Orlando, Fla.

All Day

Orlando, Fla.

All Day

Sat. Oct. 26 Football

vs Tulane

M. Soccer

vs Marshall

W. Tennis M. Tennis

W. Soccer W. Volleyball

UTSA Clay Courts Champs

UTSA Clay Courts Champs

New Orleans, La. (Superdome)

2:30 p.m.

Huntington, W.Va.

6 p.m.

Orlando, Fla.

All Day

Orlando, Fla.

All Day

Sun. Oct. 27

vs Marshall

vs Southern Miss

W. Basketball

vs Newman

W. Golf

UAB Fall Beach Blast

Huntington, W.Va.

12 p.m.

Reynolds Center

1 p.m.

Reynolds Center

5 p.m.

Mon. Oct. 28 Gulf Shores, Ala.

All Day

Valerie El Houssine spikes the ball Sunday afternoon in the Reynolds Center. El Houssine had 11 digs, nine kills and an ace in the Golden Hurricane’s 3–1 victory over the East Carolina Pirates.

’Cane rocks conference foes Tulsa volleyball won their ninth and tenth consectutive matches over the weekend.

Catherine Duininck Student Writer

TU volleyball is having a great season. The Golden Hurricane had a 3-0 sweep at Florida Atlantic on Oct. 11 which extended their seven-match winning streak.

Senior outside hitter Kellie Culberson was named the Conference USA Offensive Player of the Week after recording her 1,000 career kill.

Culbertson connected on 12 of her 24 total attacks in the sweep.

She had no attack errors for a .500 hitting percentage. She had 11 digs, one reception error in 23 attempts, and three total blocks with 14.0 points. Her four service aces gave her 150 career service aces which put her second in TU’s volleyball history.

Junior setter Bailey Clampitt recorded 26 assists and sophomore outside hitter Maura McGivern recorded a career-high 11 kills and had a .391 hitting percentage.

Freshman outside hitter Erica Bohannon recorded 10 kills and had

a .350 hitting percentage, while freshman libero Brooke Berryhill led TU with 14 digs and freshman setter Genesis Viera added 16 assists. Tulsa recorded a season-high .406 hitting percentage (48–8–96) against the Owls.

The TU volleyball team then traveled to Charlotte N.C. on Oct. 18 to take on the 49ers. Tulsa defeated Charlotte 3–1.

Sophomore outside hitter Ashley Hooper recorded a season-high 11 kills and a .391 hitting percentage. Hooper had four block assists and recorded 25 kills in her last three matches.

Senior outside hitter Kellie Culberson could not be forgotten with 15 kills and 13 digs which added to her 17th double-double of the season, while junior outside hitter Valerie El Houssine added eight kills and a .438 hitting percentage. Junior setter Bailey Clampitt recorded 26 assists and nine digs.

The freshmen were well represented with freshman libero Brooke Berryhill adding 20 digs and freshman setter Genesis Viera adding 21 assists and nine digs to help their team to victory.

TU volleyball took on East Carolina Sunday at noon at the Donald

W. Reynolds Center and continued its streak by winning 3–1.

TU played like the better team, however, small mistakes lead to ECU winning one set over the Tulsa, the first set won by the Pirates over the Hurricane since Nov. 20, 2008. Senior outside hitter Kellie Culbertson lead the team with 15 kills, 19 digs and three assists.

Senior middle blocker Miriele Gobbo had nine kills, five digs and a block. Junior outside hitter Valerie El Houssine stepped up with nine kills, 11 digs and one assist.

Junior outside hitter Bailey Clampitt had 27 assists and four digs. Sophomore middle blocker Nicole Newton helped out with nine kills, one dig and two blocks.

Freshman libero Brook Berryhill stayed consistent on her defense with 16 digs as well as three assists.

Overall this was a good match for the Golden Hurricane and a great accomplishment for the team to extend its winning streak to 10 games.

The TU volleyball team will take on Louisiana Tech Oct. 25 at 7 p.m. in the Reynolds Center.

Sports

the Collegian : 3

C-USA Standings C-USA West

C-USA East

Teams

C-USA

Overall

Teams

C-USA

Overall

Rice

3–0

5–2

Marshall

2–0

4–2

21 October 2013

C-USA mid-season football roundup Catchup on Conference USA play during the bye week for the Golden Hurricane.

Jesse Keipp

Student Writer 3–0

5–2

East Carolina

3–1

5–2

North Texas

2–1

4–3

UAB

1–1

2–4

Tulsa

1–1

2–4

Florida Int’l

1–1

1–5

La. Tech

1–2

2–5

Middle Tenn.

1–2

3–4

UTSA

1–2

2–5

Fla. Atlantic

1–4

2–5

UTEP

0–3

1–5

Southern Miss.

0–2

0–6

Cross country storms the course Men’s cross country finished fifth in pre-nationals powered by personalbest times by TU’s top two runners.

Will Bramlett Sports Editor

News and Notes •

•

Saturday was a weekend of upsets in the world of college football.

Unranked Central Florida kicked off the festivities early by beating No. 8 Louisville 38–35 on Friday night. On Saturday, No. 5 Florida State dominated No. 3 Clemson with a 51–14 victory, Ole Miss hit a field goal with two seconds left to beat LSU 27–24, No. 24 Auburn marched down the field on its last drive which concluded with a touchdown to beat No. 7 Texas A&M 45–41, Tennessee shocked No. 11 South Carolina 23-21 with a field goal as time expired, Vanderbilt handed No. 15 Georgia their second loss by a score of 31–27, Arizona State stomped No. 20 Washington 53–24 and No. 14 Mizzou, a three point underdog to No. 22 Florida, won 36–17.

Mike Smith of the Phoenix Coyotes became the 11th goalie in NHL history to score a goal. The goal came Saturday night against the Detroit Red Wings. The puck crossed the goal line with .1 seconds left on the clock for the league’s 14th goalie goal; the seventh which was actually a shot on net by the goalie credited with the goal.

•

The first BCS rankings of the year were released Sunday evening. Alabama took the top spot this week followed by Florida State, Oregon, Ohio State and then Mizzou to complete the top five.

•

The Red Sox and Cardinals advanced to the World Series. Both teams had the best record in their respective leagues this season. This is only the third World Series in the Wild Card era in which the pennant winners were also the league leaders in the regular season.

“Perhaps this year’s biggest surprise is the Tulane Green Wave”

ss Servic e l w e a L

rd wa A

The Golden Hurricane men’s and women’s cross country teams were in Terre Haute, Indiana on Saturday for the NCAA Pre-Nationals Invitation cross country meet. The men’s team under the leadership of 12-year coach Steve Gulley is currently ranked No. 9 in the nation by the United States Track & Field and Cross Country Coaches Association.

The team finished in second place at the Notre Dame Invitational two weeks ago behind surprise winner Columbia, who jumped from No. 30 to No. 8 in the rankings following the meet. Marc Scott finished in seventh place at the Notre Dame Invitational for the Golden Hurricane with a time of 24:38.1. He was followed closely by Tulsa’s Chris O’Hare, who finished in eighth place with a time of 24.38.7.

O’Hare and Scott also had strong races in Terre Haute. O’Hare ran a personal-best 23:32:91 to earn a third place finish in the 8 km race. Scott finished in 27th with his own personal-best run of 23:57.67. Andrew Hayes and Danny Thater followed Scott over the finish line to finish 30th and 32nd, respectively. Hayes finished with a time of 24:00.20 and Thater came in at 24:01.91.

Tim Rackers crossed the finish line with a time of 24:21.98 and Emmett Cookson finished at 25:33.74. The team score, or the sum of the places the runners finish, was 159, putting the Hurricane in fifth place out of 52 teams and nine points behind No. 29 Stanford.

Perennial cross country powerhouse No. 2 Colorado finished the meeting in first place with a team score of 90. No. 4 Oregon finished in second place with 113 points followed by No. 18 Iona. The defending national champions and top ranking Oklahoma State finished in seventh place with a score of 300. Oklahoma finished in ninth and Kansas finished in 14th.

The women’s team was lead across the finish line by Rachel Baptista who finished the 6 km race at 21:32.77 for 111th place.

Natasha Cockram finished one place behind Baptista with a time of 21:33.45. Brandi Krieg and Stacie Taylor finished 22:02.00 and 22:02.06 for 192nd and 194th place, respectively. Clara Langley ran the race in 22:23:37 for a 248th place finish. Olivia Lopez finished 276th at 22:38.24 and Janessa Dunn finished 295th at 22:54.59.

The team score of 856 earned the team 34th place out of 49 teams. No. 5 Georgetown won the meet with 117 points, far ahead of second place No. 2 Florida State’s 162 points.

The cross country teams will be in Denton, Texas Saturday for the Conference USA Championships. The meet, hosted by the University of North Texas, will be run on Eagle Point Cross Country Course.

The women’s 5 km race is at 9 a.m. and the men’s race begins an hour later. The award ceremonies will be at 11 a.m. The Tulsa men’s team is the only men’s or women’s cross country team in Conference USA ranked in the top 30 as of Sunday night. The NCAA Midwest Regionals meet will be held in Ames, Iowa on Nov. 15 and hopefully the Golden Hurricane will be back in Terre Haute on Nov. 23 for the NCAA Cross Country Championships.

The Golden Hurricane (2–4, 1–1 C-USA) aims for a C-USA championship repeat, but the tough 30–27 overtime loss to Rice has the Hurricane in fourth place in the C-USA West division, behind North Texas, Rice and the surprisingly successful Tulane.

While the Hurricane topped UTEP in El Paso last weekend, UTEP is contending for the cellar of C-USA West with a winless conference record. Even though the UTEP squad is relatively weak, the TU victory can nonetheless serve as a stepping stone to more conference success.

With an undefeated conference record of 3–0, Tulane hosts Tulsa Saturday at the Superdome in downtown New Orleans. A victory against the Green Wave would tremendously help TU’s prospects of again ascending to the top of the division.

Also ahead of the Golden Hurricane in the division is the University of North Texas Mean Green, which plays Tulsa on the last week of the regular season in what may turn out to be a critical matchup. UNT owns a conference record of 2–1.

Louisiana Tech and UTSA both sit behind TU with conference records of 1–2. The Hurricane will look to trip up the UTSA Roadrunners and leash the Tech Bulldogs, in weeks 10 and 13 respectively.

The Marshall Thundering Herd currently tops the East division with a 2–0 conference record. While having defeated C-USA’s UTSA and Florida Atlantic, the Thundering Herd nonetheless lacks any trademark wins, having lost to Virginia Tech and the MAC’s Ohio University.

The East Carolina University Pirates, a team predicted by many to contend for the C-USA title, trail Marshall in the East with a conference record of 3–1. With its only

Mar cy

Tulane

loss to the formidable Tulane (more on them later), ECU dominated in-state opponent North Carolina to a score of 55–31.

While leading the C-USA in most statistical categories, quarterback Shane Carden continuously ropes passes to conferenceleading receiver Justin Hardy. ECU also boasts C-USA’s fiercest pass rush with a conference-leading 20 sacks on the year. TU will have to face ECU at vivacious DowdyFicklen Stadium in week 11.

Rice shares the top of the West division with Tulane. Rice’s offense has been run through its dominant rushing attack, which leads C-USA with 229.8 yards per game and 15 touchdowns on the year. Second only to ECU, Rice’s offense has produced 2814 yards for the year. But they’ve put much more weight on their conference-leading run game.

Perhaps this year’s biggest surprise is the Tulane Green Wave. Sitting atop C-USA West, they’ve already surpassed last year’s conference win total at 3–0. After a dreadful 2–10 record in 2012, second-year head coach Curtis Johnson has the Green Wave rolling through its conference opponents including a three point victory over East Carolina.

Southern Miss doesn’t appear to be in any position to win anytime soon. After a winless record last year, they’ve lost six straight to start this year including losses to BCS opponents Nebraska, Arkansas, and Boise State. After first-year head coach Ellis Johnson failed to record a win, his replacement, Todd Monken, does not appear to be able to do much better.

The Golden Hurricane will take on the Green Wave in New Orleans Saturday.

A win would push Tulsa ahead in the conference standings, and move TU one step closer to the conference championship game.

Be sure to tune into KRMG (102.3 FM, 740 AM) to hear the Hurricane march to victory.

2013 – 2014 This award recognizes the “graduating student who most closely emulates Marcy Lawless’ generous spirit, creativity, vision, pursuit of excellence, and commitment to serving others both on campus and in the greater Tulsa community.” Any student scheduled to graduate during the December 2013 or May 2014 commencement ceremonies (undergraduate, law or graduate) is eligible. The award, which carries a cash stipend, will be presented during the December 21, 2013 commencement ceremony.

Nomination / Application forms may be obtained at any of the following locations: Student Affairs Office in Holmes Student Center, Housing Office in Twin Towers, Registration and Records in McClure Hall, or the True Blue Volunteer Center in Holmes Student Center.

Completed forms must be submitted by noon, Friday, October 25, to the True Blue Neighbor Volunteer Center in Holmes Student Center, Room #25.

NEWS

21 october 2013

TU Symphony Orchestra to open next Monday

On Monday, Oct. 28, the University of Tulsa Orchestra begins its season in Gussman Concert Hall in the Lorton Performance Center. The concert will begin at 7:30 p.m. and will feature the overture to Richard Wagner’s “Die Meistersinger von Nürnberg” and Felix Mendelssohn’s Symphony No. 3.

The Wagner overture is a suitable invocation for the work that would follow. The three-movement comic opera takes about four and a half hours to perform, and it is the only comedy among Wagner’s late-career operas.

The opera tells the story of Walthon, a young knight who desires to join the ranks of the elite mastersingers of Germany in order to impress his lover. The overture is bombastic, holding out sections of high intensity for long periods of time. The overture sets the tone for the opera and, as per tradition, features some of the themes that will occur later.

Mendelssohn’s Symphony No. 3, (subtitled “Scottishe,” or “Scottish Symphony”) was conceived in 1929 by Mendelssohn on a walking tour through the Scottish countryside after a string of successful performances in London. A particular church on the tour prompted a letter to a friend that included the symphony’s haunting opening theme.

The symphony’s four movements (to be performed without breaks in between) give the listener a thorough picture of the Scottish landscape. The first movement begins with a dirge but soon picks up into a full jig that is descriptive of the countryside. The second

movement is peppy and features many virtuosic solo instruments.

The second movement feeds straight into the lyrical third movement, but make no mistake, this movement is not without its moments of excitement. The fourth movement returns to an upbeat, skittish jig but it features the symphony’s most powerful moments.

The work is punctuated by a short, but glorious coda, capping the symphony with the same might and fervor that is expected from the nation.

Conductor Richard Wagner’s (no, not the same Richard Wagner) piece selections are spot on, and he plans on the performance being a sheer thrill for the audience. The opera overture certainly begins the season on a high note, but it also comes with a historical punch.

“We’re in the 200th year since Wagner’s birth so orchestras around the world are playing Wagner to celebrate this special anniversary, and I thought that it would be important that we play some Wagner,” said Wagner.

The Mendelssohn will provide the audience with some fireworks to finish off the performance. One of the reasons Wagner chose the piece is its instrumental features.

“It shows off our outstanding string section,” Wagner said. “We have a very fine core of strong players at TU, and the Mendelssohn symphonies are masterworks of string writing.”

It also features a lot of solo work in the woodwinds, and the symphony complements the powerful horn section.

“It really fits the group, because that’s the most important thing,” said Wagner. “That the pieces that we play give everyone enough work so that they improve technically and that they improve musically and that we really feel like we’ve accomplished something at the end of the day.”

Oct. 5

proximately 2 weeks ago and did not report them to Security then.

On 8 October 2013, they noticed more shoes missing and reported to Security.

Officers examined the apartment and saw no signs of forced entry.

On Oct. 28, the University of Tulsa Symphony Orchestra will play its first show of the year.

Matthew Magerkurth Staff Writer

16:00 A student, cooking peppers, accidentally rubbed their eye causing a burning sensation. The Officer assisted with rinsing the eye out and easing the pain.

Oct. 6 16:00 Security and the Tulsa Fire department were dispatched to a fire alarm at Lottie Jane Mabee. Investigation revealed that a student using a hair dryer set off a smoke detector.

Oct. 7 6:00 An Officer on patrol observed a vehicle driving at an excessive speed on Delaware Ave and failing to stop at the stop sign on 5th St. When the Officer met with the driver to ask them to slow down, the person was dismissive to the Officer before walking away.

20:30 Officers were dispatched to a fire alarm at Fisher West. Investigation revealed that steam from a shower set off a smoke detector.

Oct. 8 6:00 Residents of a Norman Village Apartment reported items missing from their apartment. They first noticed some shoes missing ap-

Oct. 9 0:03 Security investigated a report of a student smoking an illegal substance at a Fisher West suite room.

Security confirmed that an underage student had been smoking a synthetic form of marijuana and drinking alcohol.

11:05 A Security Officer on vehicular patrol of Gary Place/Lorton Performing Arts Center noticed a person driving a red Acura at a high rate of speed.

The vehicle failed to slow down for a speed bump and swerved around a vehicle to avoid an accident.

The Officer stopped the person near Keplinger Hall and wrote them a traffic citation for reckless driving.

Oct. 10 17:40 An ACAC employee reported suspicious behavior of a student causing female students to feel uncomfortable. Investigating Officers recognized this student from previous reports and initiated a student misconduct report.

Oct. 12 3:30 An Officer on patrol discovered a damaged fire hydrant at 5th St. &

In the Oct. 14 Collegian, the headline for “Discource on rape unfair, uninformed” should read “Discourse on rape unfair, uninformed.”

This error occurred after the article’s writer and Collegian copy editor Carly Putnam left the newspaper’s offices for the evening with stern instructions that someone should call her if they wanted to make any changes. Conor Fellin, Kyle Walker and J.Christopher Proctor offer their humble apologies and are aware that if this happens again, they will be made into shoes. Or cheese. Or both.

the Collegian : 4

From Clubs cover

Two-Step

Then there’s the TU two-step club.

Group president Grant Wiseman explained that the dance basically involves “two sidesteps forward, one back, then repeat,” and that dances are every Wednesday in the Mabee Gym spirit room at 9:00 p.m.

TU two-step was founded last spring by Wiseman and a friend when they “got tired of Tulsa’s lack of two-stepping for anybody under 21.”

He said that people who don’t know how to two-step are especially encouraged to go to a meeting, because “there are plenty of people that can teach the basics as well as some of the more complicated moves,” and “there is no easier way to meet people than at an event like two-stepping.”

PERMIAS The words that make up the PERMIAS acronym aren’t in English.

According to former club vice president Elmer Bachtiar, “PERMIAS stands for PERsatuan Mahasiswa Indonesia di Amerika Serikat … In English, it means Organization of the Indonesian Students in the United States.”

Originating in Washington, D.C., in 1961, the mission of this nation-wide organization is to “unite the Indonesian students in the U.S. as well as share and promote (Indonesian) culture,” according to Bachtiar.

TU’s club is actually a new chapter, and Bachtiar explained that the two main events hosted by PERMIAS are Indonesian Night and Taste of Indonesia. The former is a big, general event promoting Indonesian dance, music,and food, while the latter event focuses mainly on food, along with sideshows of Indonesian puppets (wayang) and a showcase of traditional Indonesian apparel.

Bachtiar emphasized that “people should join to get the exposure of Indonesian culture … TU has a study abroad program to Indonesia (and) it could … promote more inS. Florence Ave. Investigating the scene, Officers surmised that a vehicle struck the hydrant, pulling it out of the ground and then left the scene.

Oct. 16 1:25 Officers and EMSA responded to John Mabee Hall after a student complained of a back injury.

21:40 Officers and Tulsa Police respond-

Courtesy PERMIAS

PERMIAS, TU’s Indonesian cultural club, hosts yearly events such as Indonesian Night and Taste of Indonesia.

terest for students to (go there).”

TU Fishing Fresh out of the water, TU Fishing club got its start just this year.

Group President Justin Strathe is a freshman who made sure to ask new acquaintances if they would be interested in starting a fishing club.

According to Strathe, ORU, OU and OSU already have fishing clubs, and TU’s will join them in collegiate bass fishing tournaments. The club’s first tournament was a few weeks ago, when Strathe and member Cameron Philpot fished in Hot Springs, Arkansas, placing 29th out of 50 teams.

While Strathe acknowledged that the team doesn’t have a boat and is limited in terms of “places we can go out and fish for fun,” he also said that they’ve “been accepting local sponsors for the team,” and that “anyone who is wanting to learn more about this rapidly growing sport of fishing is encouraged to join.” Collegiate fishing tournaments will be starting back up in the spring.

Academic Bowl Sophomore Moujtaba Kasmani heads the University of Tulsa’s Academic bowl. This team-based competition sets two groups of four students against each other to race to answer a wide variety of ed to a US South apartment after receiving information of a possible burglary in progress.

Upon arrival, Officers determined that friends of the resident (who was not present) had entered the unlocked apartment to look for their keys they had left there.

Oct. 17 23:45 Officers responded to Helmerich Hall regarding an irate employee.

trivia and academic questions.

The team, open to anyone, meets at 7 p.m. on Wednesdays in Chapman 205 to practice.

“We normally try to get through at least one packet of questions each week, and that normally takes 45 minutes to an hour,” said Kasmani. “Each packet has about 20 regular questions and 10 bonus questions. Each bonus question has three sub-questions.”

Members of the Academic Bowl team tend to have a wide variety of interests because of the number of different types of questions. Questions range from chemistry to history to music to mathematics to popular culture.

People who would enjoy the Academic Bowl, according to Kasmani, are students who “enjoy having a broader spectrum of interests rather than just their major.”

The team tries to go to one or two tournaments a year, and while they are interested in going to more tournaments, distance tends to be an issue. “We at least went to Washington University in Missouri last year, and that was fun.”

Kasmani and the Academic Bowl are always looking for more people to join their 14 to 15 members. Kasmani assures that there will at least be something anyone can answer.

“We try to keep the atmosphere competitive at tournaments,” Kasmani said, “but practice is pretty much stress-free.”

Upon arrival, Officers encountered the employee who was agitated and talking incoherently.

Officers attempted to calm the employee down but the employee became more agitated. The Officers turned him over to his supervisor and instructed the employee to leave the property.

The Collegian does not produce or edit the Campus Crime Watch except for content and brevity.

TU hosts annual Nimrod conference Nimrod offered a variety of master classes and other opportunities for writers to hone their skills.

Helen Patterson Staff Writer

The Nimrod International Journal of Poetry and Prose is a literary journal based out of TU. Every October, Nimrod hosts a Saturday conference from 10:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. filled with workshops, panel discussions and readings built around a theme.

This year’s conference was October 19 and centered on the theme “Hunger and Thirst: Fulfilling Desire.” TU students could attend for $10.

The day opened with a pair of concurrent panel discussions: “Hunger and Thirst: Interpretations” and “Coming to the Table: Q&A on Editing and Publishing.”

The editing and publishing panel featured practical advice for writers.

Particularly provocative was fiction and non-fiction writer Jon Katz, who challenged the oldfashioned image of the writer as an isolated creator, calling it unfeasible in the modern world. He advised writers to create an online presence and to interact collaboratively with their readers.

“Rather than tremble when the world is changing,” Katz said, “you need to understand it. That’s what creativity is.”

Of course, as Nimrod Editorin-Chief and novelist Eilis O’Neal

said, “The rule that I think everyone needs to follow is do what works for you.”

Attendees could choose two masterclasses in fiction, poetry or other pertinent topics, one in the morning and one in the afternoon.

Novelist Cristina Garcia taught the morning masterclass, “Cultivating Chaos: A Hunger for the Unexpected.” Garcia encouraged writers to free themselves from their inhibitions, “tell the secrets” and “marry your wilderness to form.”

Young adult novelist Jessica Spotswood taught about creating equal romantic characters in her afternoon masterclass, “Young Adult Fantasy: Yearning for Love Between Equals.”

Spotswood encouraged authors to develop their characters, including giving them faults. “Perfect is not okay; perfect is boring,” she said. “A person’s flaws are part of what makes them interesting.”

During lunch, there were readings by Cristina García and Aimee Nezhukumatathil, the judges for the 2013 Katherine Anne Porter Prize in Fiction and the Pablo Neruda Prize in Poetry, respectively.

After the final masterclass, there were invitational readings from masterclass teachers and panelists open to all attendees. Throughout the day, participants who had submitted pages of poetry or prose for critique could meet with a Nimrod editor to receive feedback.

Helen Patterson / Collegian

Nimrod editors and professional writers (from left to right: Kristina Gorcheva-Newberry, Cristina Garcia, Jon Katz, Jessica Spotswood, Cynthia Gustavson, Eilis O’Neal) field questions on editing and publishing at “Coming to the Table,” one of the sessions at this year’s Nimrod conference.

NEWS

the Collegian : 5

Eye on the world:

21 OCTOBER 2013

gently with all parties involved in hopes for a peaceful resolution,” Constable Jullie Rogers-Marsh said. “Those efforts have not been successful.”

Asia

Staff Writer

North America canada At least 40 people were arrested last Thursday after anti-fracking protesters in New Brunswick grew violent.

Members of the Elsipogtog First Nation had blockaded the

Rexton shale gas exploration site since the end of September. When police finally moved to take away the blockade under orders from the court, protesters threw Molotov cocktails and torched at least five police cars.

“They sprayed the crowd that was there,” a councilor of the Native American group Robert Levi said. “The chief was manhandled a little bit and all hell broke loose.”

“The RCMP has worked dili-

A stampede broke out on a crowded, narrow bridge in northern India, killing over a hundred people and injuring at least a hundred more.

According to Chief Secretary Anthony J.C. De Sa, almost 25,000 people were on the bridge when part of the railings broke, which caused a panic that the bridge would collapse.

Several top district officials have been suspended for negligence and suspicions of accepting bribes for allowing several tractors on the bridge that might have led to the panic.

“There were no collisions, but the presence of these vehicles created a commotion and rumors of

Students help Tulsans combine art, politics On Oct. 27, the Arts Management Program will host Paint Our Future, a chance for Tulsans to imagine their city’s future through art.

Kimberly Poff Staff Writer

Students in the Arts Management Program are encouraging residents of Tulsa to express their hopes for the future of the city through art in their Paint Our Future Tulsa event.

On Sunday, Oct. 27, paints, oil pastels and markers will be provided attendees at Guthrie Green from 11:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m. Everyone is invited to express their dreams for the city with the tools provided. After the event, a selection of images will be presented to the mayor in book format after elections on Nov. 12.

A degree in arts management, offered through the Henry Kendall College of Arts and Sciences, prepares students for a future in art organizations. As part of the major, students are required to earn a certificate in advertising.

Arts Administration, the class with which this project is associated, is an all-year commitment for majors and explores the ins and outs of day-to-day operations

in arts-focused organizations. This project is part of the hands-on experience students receive from professor Shirley Elliott, Program Director of the Tulsa Performing Arts Center Trust.

“I feel this event is important because it is an opportunity for the people of Tulsa to share from their heart about what they love about this city,” said senior Alden Van Patten, “and where they feel we need to improve and build upon.”

Senior arts management and music major Victoria Steinhart said, “I am personally invested in it because I love art and believe that our event asks a question that can make a difference.”

The students involved also feel their event is an opportunity for positive growth in the city through art.

As mentioned above, following the event the students will compile images from the event into a book to be presented to the newly elected mayor. There is hope that starting their term with a message from their constituents will keep the mayor focused on the direction laid out by the people.

“Paint Our Future is important because it allows the people’s voice to be heard, engages people in an artistic way and requests action and leadership from the city of Tulsa,” said Steinhart. “This

event is also a creative and fun way to express your opinion to the mayor.”

“I hope for myself and other Tulsans to feel that their participation in this event will truly make an impact on the city,” said Alden.

“I hope they walk away inspired and maybe even surprised by how they and others feel about Tulsa.”

Students looking to get their own ideas about the city out there are also welcome to adorn the canvas at Guthrie Green with artistic representations of their hopes for Tulsa.

Courtesy Paint Our Future Tulsa

Paint Our Future Tulsa will tie together Tulsa politics and art, partially in preparation for the upcoming mayoral race.

Do the Sudoku!

Puzzle 1 (Medium, difficulty rating 0.52)

4 9

8 2

8

8

6

1

4

9

7

2

1 7

5 4

3

3

4 2

2 4

7

7 9 8

Southeast Asia MALAYSIA

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Magdalena Sudibjo

the bridge collapsing—that led to the stampede,” Inspector General of Police S.M. Afzal told The Hindu, a local newspaper.

8

A Malaysian appeals court has banned non-Muslims from using the word “Allah” to refer to the Judeo-Christian God. The court decision reversed a ruling four years prior that favored the Catholic Church after the Malaysian government prohibited the use of the word in a local Catholic newspaper.

The 2009 decision elicited a surge of attacks on places of worship, both churches and mosques.

“The usage of the word Allah is not an integral part of the faith in Christianity,” Chief judge Mohamed Apandi Ali, one of the three judges in the appeal panel, said.

“The usage of the word will cause confusion in the community.”

Many critics point out that “Allah” has been used by non-Muslims throughout history.

“What about the 10 [million] to 12 million Arab Christians today?” Fouad Accad writes in his

book “Building Bridges: Christianity and Islam.” “They have been calling God ‘Allah’ in their Bibles, hymns, poems, writings, and worship for over 19 centuries.”

Oceania NEW ZEALAND At 28, New Zealander Eleanor Catton has become the youngest recipient of the Man Booker Prize for her historical fiction “The Luminaries.” At 848 pages, the book is the longest ever to receive the award.

Catton’s book depicts a murder mystery set during a gold rush in 1866 New Zealand.

“The Luminaries is a magnificent novel: awesome in its structural complexity; addictive in its storytelling and magical in its conjuring of a world of greed and gold,” Robert Macfarlane, one of the judges, said.

This year is the last year that the Man Booker Prize, Britain’s most prestigious book award, will be limited to novels from Britain, Ireland or a commonwealth country.

Next year, the award will be open to all novels written in English and published in Britain.

Class gives students millions to invest The Student Investment Fund provides millions of dollars for specially selected business students to spend on real investments.

Witt Womack Staff Writer

The Collins College of Business’ Student Investment Fund (SIF), a portion of the school’s endowment, is managed and invested in the financial market by business students enrolled in the Student Investment Fund course.

The fund first came under student management in April 1998, when $300,000 was transferred into its coffers. Today, through student investments and continued contributions to the Finance Excellence Fund, SIF students are working with over $3 million.

Owing to the stakes involved, participatory students in the SIF are limited to a select few. Both undergraduates and graduates may enroll, but the prerequisite courses ensure that only business students who have been grounded in financial theory and investing management techniques may take the course.

In addition, there is an additional application process culminating in current SIF students reviewing the candidates and voting for their successors. All of this is supposed to ensure that those students managing the SIF portfolio are qualified for the responsibility.

This semester, there are 22 SIF student members. One of these, graduate student Sarthak Jain, explained how meetings operated.

“We have SIF meetings on every Wednesday where all the members are present along with (faculty advisor) Tally Ferguson,” he said.

Ferguson, who teaches finance courses, said the class “generally receives updates from various committees” during these meetings. “Often there is some knowledge transfer from the faculty advisor and three times we (had)

guest speakers,” he elaborated.

In addition, committees meet individually during the week. Jain, for instance, is the Chair of the Portfolio, Accounting and Risk Committee and meets on Thursday.

“When we are discussing some investment, the discussions are amazing and all sorts of points of view come to light,” Jain said, but he indicated that despite the different perspectives, students keep a level-head. “We try to maintain a very professional atmosphere during our meetings.”

Investment decisions are made in a very procedural manner. “We use mainly fundamental analysis but have recently added some mean variance optimization and risk return optimization techniques,” explained Ferguson.

“Each student uses some classical valuation tools and determines how much the market varies from their own calculations,” Ferguson continued. “Students have to explain why differences materialize.”

Because the fund uses real money, students must adapt quickly to situations developing in the realworld market, and their decisions have actual repercussions.

“Last Wednesday, we were discussing the government shutdown,” said Jain. “The Macro committee gave us an insight about what’s going on with various sectors and what might come next, how it will affect the financial markets and (whether there are) any investing opportunities.”

The real advantage of the SIF is, of course, the invaluable realworld experience for students. “(Students) learn how to apply academic theory of finance to practical investment decisions, and they get to test those theories against market practice,” Ferguson said of the benefits.

“They learn how to run an investment company and get experience relying on one another,” said Ferguson. “Here, when one team member slacks off, the entire fund is harmed.”

Staff Picks

If you had infinite time and resources, what student organization would you start?

Performance Artists’ Society—Anna Bennett, Satire Editor

Monkeys and Typewriters Club—Kyle Walker, Managing Editor

6

Polo Club—Stephanie Hice, Variety Editor

3

The Can’t Sing, but Love To Sing Club—Will Bramlett, Sports Editor

Netflix and Cheap Wine That Tastes Like Sadness Appreciation Society—Carly Putnam, Copy Editor The Society to Investigate the Generation of Hatred—Patrick Creedon, Opinion Editor

2 Courtesy OpenSky Sudoku Generator

Now the State-Run Media isn’t the only fun paper in town. The Collegian offers you hours of amusement with this Sudoku puzzle.

Stare at the numbers.

Assign the numbers their immovable place within the status quo. Oct Laugh the numbers futile attempts Generated by http://www.opensky.ca/~jdhildeb/software/sudokugen/ on Sun 20as 22:57:12 2013make GMT. Enjoy! to escape their tedious existence. Recognize that your placement of the numbers was itself predetermined by the structure of the puzzle. Reflect upon your inability to change the system or your place within it.

The Organization for the Creation and Propagation of Concise and Easy-to-Remember Club Names that Lend Themselves to Memorable Acronyms (OCPCERCNLTMA)—Conor Fellin, News Editor The Collegian—J. Christopher Proctor, Editor-in-Chief

variety

21 October 2013

the Collegian : 6

The Restaurant at Gilcrease elegant but disappointing Although The Restaurant at Gilcrease accepts campus dining dollars, the dishes were rather lackluster, as they were often overwhelmed with unnecessary flavors that tarnished the overall meal.

Helen Patterson Kimberly Poff Staff Writers

The Restaurant at Gilcrease has one aspect which recommends it above all others: it accepts dining dollars as payment. It is possibly the only “fancy” restaurant which does so, and is certainly the only one which sells champagne.

As such, these intrepid reviewers made the trip down 244 to see what could be purchased with campus funny money.

The Restaurant is nestled within the museum. Although it may be difficult to locate, friendly museum staff are happy to direct patrons, and admission to the museum is free to TU students.

Given the fairly remote location of the museum, The Restaurant has an excellent view overlooking the forest. These reviewers even caught a glimpse of a bald eagle while seated near the far wall.

There were several soup and ap-

petizer options, but the most interesting appetizer was the crawfish hushpuppies with chipotle remoulade. The hushpuppies themselves were crispy, and maintained a good texture. Biting into them was delightful. Unfortunately, there was too much cheese, and this overwhelmed the flavor of the crawfish. We did not receive any remoulade, so whether or not it was delicious remains a mystery.

The salads offered were fairly tame, including a caesar and a house with grilled salmon. We sampled the fall spinach salad, which like the rest of the items on the menu, suffers from too many modifiers from its menu description. The menu lists the salad as the “Fall Spinach Salad with pomegranate, apple, candied walnuts, goat cheese and maple cider vinaigrette.” It was as good as those ingredients sound, though not better than the sum of its parts.

One of the better entrée options was the vista buffalo burger which The Restaurant markets as one of its favorites. The burger was delicious and juicy, cooked exactly the way it was ordered. It came on a bun that was slightly too toasted but otherwise excellent in taste and texture.

The burger itself was served with delicious white cheddar and fresh tomato. Bacon jam sauce accompanied the meal, and was an intriguing concoction that tasted like bacon barbeque jello. The burger was supposed to be served with poblano slaw, but was instead served with fries. The fries were

delicious; they were salted just right and did not taste frozen.

Another entrée was the redeye braised short ribs, which were served with asparagus rather than the advertised wilted greens. Unfortunately, the ribs came with far more fat than necessary and the fingerling potatoes were a little too salty.

For dessert, the chocolate tart with salted caramel was rich and incredibly delicious. However, it did not actually have any salted caramel on it. Instead, it was served with an artificial strawberry sauce and a sliced strawberry. The strawberry sauce and the strawberry itself—though they improved the presentation of the plate and added color—did not taste very good.

The marscapone tower was a layering of graham cracker crust and ginger mascarpone. Aside from the slightly non sequitur pineapple drizzle on the plate, this dessert was phenomenal. Whole chunks of ginger floated through the mascarpone giving it an exciting pop to counter the smooth cheese. It was a shining garnish on an otherwise sometimes lackluster meal.

Intrepid students seeking to relieve themselves of Steadbucks at The Restaurant should bear in mind that waiters prefer to be informed of the method of payment at the meal’s commencement, as it makes settling the bill vastly easier. Please also note that dining dollars cannot be used to leave gratuity.

Tulsa Opera’s “Marriage of Figaro” superbly performed Located at 16th and Boulder, less than a 10-minute drive from campus, the Tulsa Opera opened its 2013–14 season, “Love, Lust and Religion” with Mozart’s comedic opera, “The Marriage of Figaro.”

DIY Halloween Costumes

With Halloween quickly approaching, a few of you more popular individuals may start to get invitations to costume parties. You can blame the government shutdown all you want, but at the end of the day, either you are too poor or too lazy to go out and buy a wellmade, fun costume.

Never fear, in the age of Pinterest, anyone can make a terrible costume out of things lying around a dorm or apartment.

Remember, cleverness and cleavage is worth more than construction!

1. Wear lingerie and animal ears (“I’m a mouse! Duh!”).

This goes for men and women alike. The ears don’t have to be good or even recognizable.

2. Be a clever pop culture visual pun: pin gray paint swatches to your shirt (“Fifty Shades of Grey,” get it?); wear an old computer monitor over your head and sing loudly (Adele, get it?).

3. Dress up as a nudist.

4. Bad visual puns are even better when you have friends to help you out! You and a buddy could dress up as a “Rock and a Hard Place,” then have people stand between you. Or one of you could be Piss, and the other could be Vinegar.

5. Switch clothes with a friend and go as them. It doesn’t matter if you shop

at the same store, it’s the thought that counts.

6. Turn your least sexy clothing into something sexy. Basically, just cut away 80 percent of the fabric. Suddenly, you go from graduating senior to “Sexy Graduate.” Or go from standard-issue scrubs to “Sexy Nurse.” That’s how it works, right?

7. Write something clever in sharpie on a t-shirt.

Simply declare yourself to be something (“witch,” “ghost,” “librarian,” “janitor”) and through the power of language and stupidity, that gesture will be sufficient and thought-provoking.

This is a great way to start discussions on perception and readership theory.

8. Turn all those empty toilet paper tubes into something with little effort, like a Bach wig or an oversized ammunition clip.

All you need is a little spray paint, and willingness to be a heavily armed Johann Sebastian Bach.

9. Cut armholes and a neck opening in a paper grocery bag. Cut the bottom up to look all fringy.

Boom, flapper.

10. Just wear your normal clothes. When someone cute asks you what you’re supposed to be, simply reply, “your future boyfriend/girlfriend.”

Holiday Insanity creative writing

Helen Patterson Staff Writer

“The Marriage of Figaro” is possibly one of Mozart’s best-known comic operas. The work is based on the second play in a trilogy by French playwright Beaumarchais.

It is set on the wedding day of Figaro (Seth Carico) and Susanna (Ava Pine) at the palatial estate of the powerful nobleman, Count Almaviva (Alexander Elliott).

This year, the Tulsa Opera opened its 2013–14 season, themed “Love, Lust and Religion,” with Mozart’s classic on October 18 and 20. The show was sung in Italian, but English supertitles were projected above the stage, making it easy to follow the story.

The Count has lately neglected his wife, the Countess (Eleni Calenos), and started chasing after her beautiful chambermaid, Susanna.

His valet, Figaro, the Countess, Susanna and the amorous page, Cherubino (Lauren McNeese) spend most of the opera plotting against the Count, trying to find ways to expose his philandering and ridicule him.

The Count, partially aware of their plots and suspicious of his own wife, enlists the help of Marcellina (Linda Roark-Strummer), Dr. Bartolo (Peter Strummer) and Don Basilio (Marc Schapman).

After an exciting blend of intrigue, seduction, jealousy, love and mistaken identity, the work ends with the Count humbly asking for forgiveness, and the rejoicing of four (more-or-less) happy couples.

With comedic operas, staging and acting are crucial to carrying the show, especially for a longer production such as “The Marriage of Figaro.” Fortunately, the staging was excellent, and the actors

By Anna Bennett

Alex White Student Writer

Photo courtesy Tulsa World

After learning that Figaro, the Countess, Cherubino and Susanna (Ava Pine, center) have been plotting against him, Count Almaviva (Alexander Elliott, left), determined to disrupt the wedding of Figaro and Susanna, enlists the help of Marcellina, Dr. Bartolo and Don Basilio (Marc Schapman, right).

were adroit, intimately interacting not only with each other, but also with their environment, standing on chairs and even throwing things in fits of rage. Particularly outstanding was McNeese’s Cherubino, whose exaggerated display of youthful affection and boyish sulking were comedic highlights.

The singing was exquisite. One of the more impressive voices was that of Calenos as the Countess.

Her tone was rich and beautiful, and she maintained a consistent vibrato and clarity throughout her range. Her projection was excellent, and her voice could always be discerned over the orchestra.

There were a few minor problems with the production. The set change between the first and second acts was overly long, and the audience became a little restless.

There were also some problems

with sound levels. It can be difficult for a singer to project over a full orchestra, and unfortunately, it was occasionally hard to hear the performers in their middle registers, particularly Pine, whose Susanna had a very light voice.

The Tulsa Opera is putting on two more productions in the Spring, “Elmer Gantry” by Robert Aldridge on February 28 and March 2, and “Carmen” by Bizet May 2 and 4. Each of the three shows are a part of the opera’s aptly titled “Love, Lust and Religion” season.

The opera is located at 16th and Boulder, just a short drive from campus. Student rush tickets (a limited number of tickets made available the day of the performance) are $16 with a current student ID.

Keith had been Christmas shopping for his two kids at the mall all day and was worn thin. The venture had taken its toll, and when he started driving home in his blue minivan he was not in a good mood. The path home took him along a sweeping empty country road.

Looking in his rearview mirror, he saw another middle-aged man driving a minivan down the narrow road accelerate to pass him to his left, and then immediately slow down to take the next right.

Keith slammed on the breaks and a few presents in the front seat spilled onto the floor. Words he’d rarely used since college spewed from his mouth and he flipped off the man in the minivan. The man stuck his hand out the sun-roof and proudly displayed his longest finger in response.

Keith gripped the steering wheel ‘till his knuckles turned white and he turned right, boiling with rage, following the man even though it wasn’t the direction he needed to go. The two minivans’ engines strained painfully as both drivers had their feet to the floor. Keith pulled up to the left of the other man’s car and yelled obscenities, glaring in between breaths. The other man did the same and they ate road and rubber together. They were taking up both lanes of the road and approaching dangerous speeds in their twin clunkers.

Keith’s opponent rolled down his window and continued spurt-

ing spittle and curse words. Keith did likewise and picked up a football he’d bought for his son and chucked it. Out the window went the football and the last of Keith’s inhibitions. The football was caught by the wind and bounced harmlessly off the backseat window.

However, the act crossed a line and they both knew it. The other man had apparently been holiday shopping as well, because he reached into the back seat and pulled out a wooden baseball bat wrapped in plastic. He poised to throw, and hurled it at Keith, but Keith ducked and the bat sailed past him, breaking the passenger window.

Keith’s logic was delightfully quiescent. Keith was no longer Keith. He was frustration, he was dissatisfaction. Keith was a little god burning a blazing trail of insanity across the American road in a blue minivan.

Keith had gained a slight edge on the other man and pulled in front of him, cutting him off, but the man shifted into the left lane and strained to catch up to Keith.

In the distance a car driving in the opposite direction was approaching. The two minivans continued speeding unperturbed as the car grew larger and larger on the horizon.

The car was just a few hundred meters away and approaching fast when Keith’s fiendish rival slowed and pulled behind him, returning to reality and the speed limit. He pulled over, made a u-turn and drove away, conceding defeat.

Keith, however, showed no signs of stopping and retained his neurotic audacity, charging onward like a raging bull into the fading horizon.

Opinion

the Collegian : 7

21 October 2013

Malala Yousafzai: eventual Nobel laureate Malala Yousafzai’s history of activism points to a promising future of education advocacy.

Morgan Krueger

Staff Writer

Few people are brave enough to stand up to the Taliban, and not many of those who do are eleven years old. That is how old Malala Yousafzai was when she started on the path to becoming the world advocate for education that she is today.

It all started in 2008, when BBC started looking for a new way to cover the growing influence of the Taliban in Swat Valley, Pakistan.

They hit upon the idea of having

a schoolgirl write about how the Taliban’s ban on girls’ attending school affected their daily lives.

Yousafzai agreed to write, protected under the pseudonym Gul Makai.

Now, five years later, the world is waking up and recognizing Yousafzai’s efforts to promote education.

Yousafzai’s writings showed her desire to acquire an education and for all girls to have the same chance.

Her writings attracted increasing international attention, and eventually her true identity was revealed by her father when he nominated her for an international peace prize.

This revelation marked her ascent to fame, and soon Yousafzai was appearing on Pakistani TV news channels. She was awarded a national peace prize from Pakistan, and continued to campaign relentlessly for girls to have the right to an education. When she

appears in a New York Times documentary, Yousafzai’s fame spread around the globe.

Not everyone approved of Yousafzai as a symbol of hope and education. Ehsanullah Ehsan, the chief spokesman for the Pakistani Taliban, called Yousafzai a “symbol of the infidels and obscenity.”

When Yousafzai continued to gain support for her cause, the Taliban took actions against her: they tried to have her killed.

She was shot in the head on her way home from school, but he survived the attempt and continued to promote girls’ education.

“It feels like this life is not my life,” Yousafzai said. “It’s a second life. People have prayed to God to spare me and I was spared for a reason—to use my life for helping people.”

People recognized Yousafzai’s contribution to the world. She was nominated for the 2013 Nobel Peace Prize. “She is a candidate who embodies several causes: the

rights of girls and women, education, youth, and the fight against extremism,” said prize observer Kristian Berg Harpviken, the head of the Peace Research Institute of Oslo, about Yousafzai.

However, many commentators argued that Yousafzai is too young to receive such a prestigious award, and that a quick rise to fame does not constitute a good reason to win a Nobel Peace Prize.

A prize now would be premature, as Yousafzai is just starting her life of advocacy. With her potential many think she will likely be nominated again in the future, including Thorbjoern Jagland, Chairman of the Norwegian Nobel Committee, the committee in charge of choosing the Nobel Peace Prize recipient.

Yousafzai herself agreed that she wasn’t ready to win the award, saying, “I think that I still need to work a lot. In my opinion I have not done that much to win the Nobel Peace Prize.”

While Yousafzai didn’t receive the Nobel Peace Prize—this time—Yousafzai did meet with President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama in the Oval Office on Friday, October 11.

Yousafzai said it was “a wonderful honor to meet with the Obamas,” and, according to the Washington Post, she also “expressed my concerns (to President Obama) that (American) drone attacks are fueling terrorism” in Pakistan, said Yousafzai in a statement published by the Associated Press. “Innocent victims are killed in these acts, and they lead to resentment among the Pakistani people.”

After the meeting, Yousafzai watched President Obama sign a proclamation celebrating the International Day of the Girl.

The proclamation said “on every continent, there are girls who will go on to change the world in ways we can only imagine, if only we allow them the freedom to dream.”

11 Oct. 2013

12 March 2009

Yousafzai meets with President Obama and his family

Yousafzai's blog ends

3 Jan. 2013

3 Jan. 2009 12 July 1997 Malala Yousafzai is born in Mingora, Pakistan

Yousafzai starts writing a blog for the BBC under a pseudonym concerning life under the Taliban in Pakistan

Sept. 2008

Dec. 2009

19 Dec. 2011

Yousafzai's identity is revealed by several articles about her

Yousafzai wins the first Pakistani National Youth Peace Prize

May 2009

Yousafzai speaks to a Yousafzai is filmed along with her father in a press club in Peshawar documentary about the about her education rights Second Battle of Swat by the New York Times

9 Oct. 2012

Oct. 2011 Archbishop Desmond Tutu nominates Yousafzai for the International Children's Peace Prize

18 Feb. 2008

Yousafzai speaks against the Taliban on the Pakistani television show Capital Talk

Yousafzai is discharged from the Queen Elizabeth Hospital Birmingham, the third hospital at which she has been treated

A Taliban soldier shoots Yousafzai while she rode home on a bus from an exam 12

July 2013

Yousafzai speaks at the UN to call for worldwide access to education Graphic by Jill Graves

Though only 16 years old, Malala Yousafzai has been involved in education activism for 5 years since late 2008 at the urging of her father. The graphic above is a timeline depicting important moments in both Malala Yousafzai’s life and her work as an activist.

When should our break Fall?

Would fall break give TU students a much needed mid-semester respite?

Steven Buchele

Staff Writer

Fall break. I’ve heard this phrase thrown around by some of my friends at other colleges in the past couple of weeks, and I was intrigued.

The University of Tulsa does not have a fall break usually a three- to four-day weekend scheduled somewhere between the second week of October and the first week of November.

Fall breaks usually fall just after the midterm season and afford students a chance to catch a breath and recharge as they prepare for the second half of the semester.

Some schools choose to not have a fall break, like TU, and the reason why is that these days off are added into the break around the Thanksgiving holiday. However, this might not actually be the case for some other schools.

Tulsa shares its 86th spot in the US News rankings with four other colleges: The University of Alabama, SUNY College of Environmental Science and Forestry, University of California, Santa Cruz,

and the University of Colorado, Boulder. SUNY-ESF and CU both have weeklong breaks around the Thanksgiving holiday; while UCSanta Cruz and the University of Alabama both have separate long weekends around the end of October and Thanksgiving. Schools around the University of Tulsa are equally mixed in how they handle fall break.

The University of Kansas has split breaks, as do Oklahoma State University and Tulane University.

Kansas State University has a full week at Thanksgiving; however Rice University, like TU, does not have a fall break, but their Thanksgiving break does not seem to have been expanded to compensate.

The real question is: would a fall break be useful? Is the long Thanksgiving break really preferable? The short answer is: no one is really sure.

For students whose families live relatively close to their universities, fall break tends to be preferred.

Many students who attend universities have written to their student newspapers explaining how much they liked their time off, how well the long weekend was scheduled or how relaxing it was to have a long week end.

Others, feel quite the opposite.

Forrest Brown, a student writer for the University of Virginia’s student newspaper, expressed his distaste for the long weekend. “Break was just a temporary reprieve, not

the restful opportunity to catch up on work it should have been.” For students who don’t live close to campus, a fall break might have little worth as well.

A long week end is hardly worth spending the money for gas or a plane, and the amount of time one can spend at home is not enough for the time off to be worthwhile.

Charlie Sprague expressed similar sentiments in his article in the Claremont-McKenna student newspaper The Forum: “Given how short Fall Break is... It isn’t much of a break at all.”

TU’s week-long Thanksgiving break isn’t without its controversy. Many enjoy the time that they can use to leave campus, and it is enough time to justify a trip back home even for those who don’t leave near by.

But with only three weeks after their return some students feel that the break is a huge disruption.

Many projects (and the second round of midterms) are squeezed into that last week after break before finals start, so much of some students’ break is spent either working or feeling guilty about not studying.

Those who can’t make the return trip home and are stuck on campus, are faced with a desolate, and primarily shut down campus.

Whether two shorter fall breaks are better than one long break is still up for discussion. Yet the ageold saying “the grass is greener on the other side” seems to hold true in this case.

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Advertising Policy: Advertising appearing in this publication does not imply approval or endorsement by the University of Tulsa or The Collegian for the products or services advertised. For advertising information, email The Collegian at collegian@utulsa.edu or elizabeth-cohen@utulsa.edu. The deadline for advertising is 12 p.m. on the Friday prior to the publication. Editing Policy: The Collegian reserves the right to edit all copy submitted by all writers. This editing may take place in many forms, including grammar corrections, changes in paragraph structure or even the addition or removal of sections of content. Editorial Policy: Columnists are solely responsible for the content of their columns. Opinions expressed in columns may not represent the opinions of the entire Collegian staff, the administrative policies of the University of Tulsa, the views of the student body or our advertisers. Letter Policy: Letters to the editor must be less than 500 words. While we do not require it, letters sent via e-mail to the Collegian are encouraged. Under no circumstances will anonymous letters be published. The name of the person submitting the letter must be published with the letter. We reserve the right to edit or reject all letters. The deadline for letters is 5 p.m. on the Saturday prior to publication.

editor-in-chief—J.Christopher Proctor managing editor—Kyle Walker news editor—Conor Fellin sports editor—Will Bramlett variety editor—Stephanie Hice opinion editor—Patrick Creedon satire editor—Anna Bennett photo & graphics editor—Jill Graves copy editor—Carly Putnam business & advertising manager—Liz Cohen distribution manager—Walker Womack web manager—Alex White aribitrary writer of the week—Jesse Keipp

Opinion

21 October 2013

the Collegian : 8

Vouchers a misuse of education funds

Tax revenue now going to fund vouchers to private schools could be better spent on programming and resources for public education.

Giselle Willis Staff Writer

In early October, twelve Oklahomans filed a lawsuit against the Oklahoma Department of Education over the continued dissemination of state taxes towards the tuition of special-needs children attending private schools.

According to the Tulsa World, the Lindsey Nicole Henry Scholarships for Students with Disabilities provide state funding for

disabled children to attend private schools, but the plaintiffs, who include college professors, retired and current superintendents, an Oklahoma senator, a retired judge and a parent of a disabled child, argued that “the Oklahoma Constitution only authorizes the Legislature to fund ‘a system of free public schools wherein all the children of the state may be educated.’”

The lawsuit also declared that “the Oklahoma Supreme Court has already ruled that when a parent wants to send a child to a private secular or religious school, that parent is ‘faced with the necessity of assuming the financial burden which the choice entails.’”

Moreover, special needs children who attend private schools without special needs services end up getting them from public schools anyway, which raises the question of why a disabled child would go to a private school without services on a disability scholarship that could have paid for better services at a public school.

Yet according to state records, more than $1.3 million sent 220 special-needs students to private schools last year. That money did not just come from an overall state budget; it’s money that would have otherwise gone towards public schools.

Out of forty-nine private schools in Oklahoma, “only six specifically cater to students with special needs,” said the Tulsa World.

Plaintiff Amy Vargas, former public school teacher and mother of a disabled child, also told the Tulsa World that she “just feel(s) like they are using special-needs kids to promote an agenda that has nothing to do with special education.”

In this way, the Board of Education can claim to be funding special needs services, but are potentially ignoring those in public schools. She also said that in any case, vouchers provided by the Henry Scholarship don’t even “pay for the full amount of private-school tuition,” so only people who can afford to pay the difference can actually

use them.

Average private school tuition in Oklahoma can range from nothing to $50,000 (generally for boarding schools) a year, while the Lindsey Nicole Henry Scholarships for Students with Disabilities is generally around $7,000, according to the Henry Scholarships website.

Representative Jason Nelson plans on supporting the defendants, here the Oklahoma Department of Education and Board of Education, and claimed that the case “appears to be about an ideological hostility to the rights of parents to direct the education of their children,” and that people need to think about “ensuring children get the best education possible regardless of where they get that education.”

These defenses, however, are weak. After all, the state’s Supreme Court basically already decided against it, as is mentioned in the lawsuit. The fact that only six of the

See Voucher page 9

Tulsa’s Bridenstine supported shutdown Oklahoma Rep. Jim Bridenstine proud of role in government shutdown despite overwhelmingly negative results.

Nikki Hager Staff Writer

After 16 days of a partial government shutdown, Congress passed legislation reopening the government, just hours before the US was to reach the debt ceiling. However, this solution is only temporary.

Unless Congress can pass additional legislation, the government will shut down again on Jan. 15 and reach the debt ceiling on Feb. 7.

Financial ratings agency Standard & Poor estimated the cost of the shutdown to be $24 billion, .6 percent of the U.S. fourth quarter GDP.

Jim Bridenstine, Oklahoma’s first district congressman, voted against the measure that eventually reopened the government.

The first district encompasses the Tulsa metropolitan area, including Tulsa, Washington and Wagoner counties and part of Rogers and Creek counties.

“I voted ‘No’ on the bill to raise the debt ceiling without any spending controls and fund the government without providing any relief to millions of Americans being harmed by Obamacare,” said Bridenstine in a press release from Oct. 16.

The House has attempted to repeal or defund The Affordable Care Act, or Obamacare, roughly 42 times.

It has yet to be repealed.

“The reason the federal government is shut down is because President Obama and his allies continue to protect a failed law that is hurting the country.

Congress should ensure not another dime of taxpayer money is spent on Obamacare,” said Bridenstine in a press release from Oct. 1.

While the Supreme Court established the constitutionality of the American Afford-

able Care Act in Summer of 2012, Congressmen Bridenstine was not impressed.

“Just because the Supreme Court rules on something doesn’t necessarily mean that that’s constitutional,” said Bridenstine in a Daily Caller interview last March.

I called both Bridenstine’s Tulsa and DC offices and emailed him on Oct. 2, immediately after the government shutdown, for further comment. Bridenstine has yet to respond.

“The President’s policy of funding all of the government or none of the government violates the principles of a representative republic and is devastating to a nation historically governed by consensus,” said Bridenstine in his Oct. 16 press release.

Alternatively, Bridenstine suggested a piecemeal approach, that the government should continue to fund the Department of Defense, Homeland Security, Military Construction and Veterans Affairs and Energy and Water Development.

Following Bridenstine’s approach, the majority of the 1 million government workers that were furloughed during the shutdown would have continued to be out of

Collegian graph of the week

Percentage of national income received by top 1% of households

Data from “Income Inequality in the United States”, Thomas Piketty and Emmanuel Saez

30.00

25.00 1928

2007

20.00

work, but at least they wouldn’t be burdened with the economic misfortunes of Obamacare.

The consequences of the shutdown on the Republican Party were significant.

A Washington Post-ABC News poll finds 74 percent of Americans disapprove of the way congressional Republicans are handling budget negotiations.

Additionally, the overall approval of congressional Republicans is the lowest it has been in party history, 28 percent, according to a recent Gallup poll.

The negative consequences of the government shutdown continue both financially and in public opinion, and another budget showdown looms just around the corner.

While Bridenstine has not publically said how he will act come January when this week’s legislation expires, Bridenstine stands by his vote against reopening the government.

For reference, things that cost less than the federal government 16-day shutdown: - IBM’s third-quarter revenues - The American Red Cross’s total yearly operating expenses ... multiplied by seven - The revenues from two and a half NFL seasons - The Yankees payroll, 100 times over - The annual GDP for El Salvador - 83 Boeing Dreamliner planes - NASA’s budget - Running the International Space Station for just under 8 years - 6,315 Super Bowl ads

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Information courtesy of NBCNews 10.00

Nobel Prize for Economics goes to disparate thinkers

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Inflation adjusted family income by quintile from 1966–2012 Data from US Census Bureau

250,000

200,000

150,000 Lowest fifth Middle fifth 100,000

Highest fifth

50,000

0

Graphics by Jill Graves

This week TU students received free admission at the Circle Cinema to the newly released documentary “Inequality for All.” The film— narrated by former Labor Secretary Robert Reich—focuses on America’s growing inequality and the political and economic problems it poses. Above we have reproduced two graphs relating to inequality.

The top graph depicts the percentage of national income (including capital gains) received by the top 1 percent of income earners between 1913 and 2012. In the documentary, Reich uses this graph extensively, making note of the similarities between the peak years of 1928 and 2007. The second graph shows the real mean wages in 2012 adjusted dollars for the top, middle and bottom quintiles from 1968 to 2012, highlighting the relative growth in top wages and the stagnation of low and middling wages.

“Inequality for All” will be screening at Circle Cinema for the rest of the week.

Eugene Fama, Peter Hansen and Robert Shiller are this year’s winners.

Nikki Hager Staff Writer

Americans Eugene Fama, Lars Peter Hansen, both of the University of Chicago, and Robert Shiller, of Yale, shared the Nobel Prize in Economics for their work analyzing asset prices and trends in financial markets.

The award was announced last Monday, separate from other Nobel awards. The Sveriges Riksbank Prize in Economic Sciences in Memory of Alfred Nobel, more commonly referred to as just the Nobel Prize in Economics, was established in 1968 by the Swedish Central Bank, unlike the rest of the prizes that were created by the will of Alfred Nobel in 1895.

All three economists are concerned with the rationality of financial markets. However, Fama and Hansen’s work starkly counters Shiller. Most years, the committee awards the prize to economists working together, not those who contradict each other.

Fama and Shiller both try to explain and predict long-term trends in markets spanning for three years or more. Hansen developed a statistical analysis method evaluating price movements, now used in multiple fields within the social sciences.

Page nine

the Collegian : 9

21 OCTOBER 2013

Bow tie or no tie: the Collegian staff answers one of humanity’s oldest questions After years of battling it out in Oliphant, and faced with the prospect of shrinking to a mere eight pages due to an unexpected contraction in the content market, the Collegian staff, fashionistas that we are, elected, for your reading pleasure, to conclusively decide the age-old question: bow tie or no tie? It wasn’t long before the battle lines expanded to include regular old straight neck ties, bolo ties and the Elizabethan ruff. These are the brightest minds of the Collegian, folks! Take that as you will.

The straight, no frills tie Patrick Creedon What do you picture when you imagine a powerful man? That’s right. You see a sharp-suited man with cheekbones chiseled by the ancients.

And what dare hang around his capable neck? A simple necktie, of course!

That necktie is the purest representation of the omnipresent noose of death that permeates all of life.

Only the fashionable powerful man has the guts to assert his ability to comprehend the existential crisis of death.

Why else would one wear such a tight fabric around one’s neck for such a long time other than to

The ruff: neckwear of privilege

assert their dominance in matters sartorial and existential?

One can tell who is most put together by the nature of their tie. Have they tied a four-in-hand when obviously the Half-Windsor is more appropriate for the occasion? Then they are rubbish and should be eagerly thrown out of your life. (And as everyone knows, a four-in-hand is hardly worth two-in-the-bush.) Is there a mysterious mustard stain on the keeper loop? Then that person is sloppy and should be given a right thrashing!

The tie’s utility in both displaying dominance and discovering character flaws clearly make it the most superior of all neckwear.

Kyle Walker It is a sign of the depravity of the colonies that Virginian boys (I shan’t call them ‘American’) think they can play dress up and thus become men, sporting absurd and colored lengths of fabric hung garishly from their necks.

Never have I been so appalled at the fashion sense of those whom I had once thought to be of hardy, English stock, as when I saw the wholesale abandonment of the majestic ruff in favor the so-called “necktie” which is now so current across the Pond.

What do the colonials find so offensive in the ruff? Perhaps it is the ruff’s intricacy, requiring such extensive work and delicate hand-

The bow tie. Bow ties are cool.

Elizabeth Cohen

If you’re going to wear neckwear, a bow tie is the superior choice.

From Bill Nye to Jesse Tyler Ferguson and Presidents Teddy and Franklin Roosevelt, some of the greatest and most interesting men have been known to wear bow ties.

Because a necktie is the standard neckwear when wearing a suit, a man in a bow tie is bound to catch your eye. Bow ties defy the norm when worn apart from a tuxedo. While they used to be

standard neckwear, today they are a throwback to our awesome fashion past. Also, what could be more awesome than a tie that also serves as a means to support positive social change?

Tie the Knot, an organization founded by Jesse Tyler Ferguson and his husband Justin Mikita, serves to “advocate for the civil rights of gay and lesbian Americans throughout the United States and to look damn good while doing it.” What could make a bow tie cooler?

stitching to maintain, and thus its status as a symbol of the aristocracy which offends them. (For those plebians who do not know, the ruff requires complete disassembly before washing. It must then be resewn and starched. We royalists are not known for our stiff and starchy dispositions for nothing.)

Perhaps they simply find good fashion sense too difficult to rightly appraise. The Lord knows that if I were required to grow my own food, I too would be reduced to their paltry and pitiable state.

But know this, I would hang by a “neck tie” as by a noose before being caught with such a hideous knot upon my neck. Take up the ruff, dear reader. It will serve you well.

The bolo tie, because America

J.Christopher Proctor

Graphic by Jill Graves

It fills my heart with a sad mix of horror and disgust to find that here, in Tulsa, Oklahoma, there is any debate on the optimal wear for adorning one’s neck.

Have we completely lost our way? Forsaking our Western heritage in favor of fancy new cityslicker contraptions? The choice is clear ya’ll; the bolo tie is the where it’s at.

The bolo is already the official

necktie of Arizona, New Mexico and Texas. It hearkens back to a simpler time, when men were men and home was on something call a ‘range’. Nothing gives you the instant respect of those around you quite like a bolo. It emits a vague, Will Rogers-esque aura, as people see you and think “Man, that guy in the bolo tie must be cool.” Or they just assume that you’re someone’s half crazed grandfather. Either way though: instant respect.

In conclusion #bolo.

The Collegian Neckwear Hall of Fame

Above you will find three exemplars of truly fashionable neckwear: the bow tie, the Elizabethan ruffled neck collar (or “ruff”) and the bolo tie. On the left, the eleventh incarnation of sci-fi character the Doctor, portrayed by Matt Smith, sports a Stetson and bow tie sure to regenerate interest in this waning, but winning, combination. James VI of Scotland and James I of England and Ireland, who sits in the middle, wore the ruff, the neckwear most suitable for monarchs. You are bound to lose your head over fashion this cool. And finally, check out the arresting, rugged man on the right. Former Secretary of the Interior Kenneth Lee Salazar bears the bolo tie, conveying instant authority, or at least “out West” street cred. Take note of the fly eagle on the golden medallion.

from the

archives

The Collegian, believe it or not, has existed in some form for over 100 years. Just recently, due to a generous grant from President Upham and with the help of McFarlin Library and Special Collections, we began the finishing touches on uploading these Collegians of yesteryear to an online database.

While not yet open to the public, our browsing has led to a couple of noteworthy finds. This article, taken from the December 19, 1928 issue, criticizes the new “talkies” for distracting from the local theater scene.

Every Sunday morning we take a few minutes before breakfast to look up the theatrical announcements in the paper. As a result of this habit, we have become more and more glum each succeeding week. It has been over three months since we returned from our vacation and as yet not one play has graced the stage of the Akdar.

Two second or third ‘rate musical shows have been here, and there

THE PERISCOPE

has been one excellent revue. But not one play. Will some one kindly explain this? *** We have been able to find no statistics on this subject, but we venture to suppose that no city of this size in the country offers less to the theater-going public than Tulsa. Not a stock company, no effort to attract road shows. Only a vaudeville (which, by the way, is not bad as such things go) and three movie houses. Oh yes, and KVOO. *** The Periscope assumes that one reason for this is the increasing domination of the “talkies.” (What a name for them! We suggest as an improvement, “talk-with-amouth-full-of-mushies.”) We shed no tears upon learning of the installation of one of those contraptions in the Rialto, but now comes the news of the dissolution of the Ritz orchestra to make way for a Vitaphone. And that is something else again. When we read this in

the World a week ago Sunday, we forthwith took an aspirin and returned to bed. *** In country towns, the Vitaphone is unquestionably a blessing—that is, if country movie houses can afford to install such expensive equipment. But when the canned product actually replaces such an orchestra as has been developed at the Ritz, the machine age has carried us a bit too far. And if the “Talkies” actually menace the legitimate stage, only stockholders in the Warner Brothers concern can rejoice. *** But we really question whether the “Talkies” should be blamed for our local dearth of plays. As a matter of fact, we don’t much care who is to blame. What we want is get some plays here before summer. If groans will help, this column may be regarded as a good loud one.

From Voucher page 8 private schools that accept students on this tax-funded scholarship even offer programs for special-needs students means that these students could probably get the same or even better attention at free public schools, especially if public schools actually received the money allotted to them.

The Free and Appropriate Public Education federal mandate, requires that “Oklahoma’s public schools are responsible for ensuring that each student, regardless of disability, receives an appropriate educational program that meets his or her individual needs.”

Schools are all also required to provide services and devices such as individual and family training, assessments, computer applications, and aids for daily living.

Statistically speaking, the 1,831 public schools in Oklahoma that have to include these amenities greatly outnumber the 6 private schools that also include them, so that the likelihood of quality special needs services would be greater, if voucher money were actually returned to public schools.

In fact, the Individuals with

Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) website states that public school districts actually end up taking care of students who attend nonpublic schools anyway, because public schools “must … determine if (private school students are) eligible for special education,” and then “public school personnel must provide the services at a public facility.”

The use of state funds to attend a private school is not the same as filling out a FAFSA to attend TU, because attending a public university also costs money. Nor can this be compared to the approach employed (and recently abandoned)

by New Jersey, in which everyone’s property taxes were merged into one budget that was equally distributed to all public schools.

In this case, parents who lived in richer neighborhoods got upset because their money went towards the betterment of schools in poorer districts. The main problem here isn’t paying for other schools, it’s paying for private schools that don’t even provide special needs services, and taking money away from public schools who will have to provide those services anyway.

21 October 2013

the

The State-Run Media

State-Run media If it ain’t broke, it’s definitely not a liberal arts major.

“It’s monopoly money”

Revelation about source of Student Investment Fund surprises no one.

Patrick Creedon

Not a part of your system

Graphic by Anna Bennett

Crewmen from the USS Enterprise make a pitsop at the Starfleet base at 81st and Lewis, as they’ve apparently been doing since 1963. Many of the base’s buildings are actually named after renowned Starfleet captains, like Bloku Timko who discovered Talos IV, and Oral the Great, who brought dentistry to the Klingon people.

81st and Lewis Ave: The Final Frontier Starfleet base discovered in South Tulsa, “Thar be dragons” removed from Tulsa map.

Anna Bennett Red Shirt

This week, a crew of fearless and intrepid explorers plumbed the unknown depths of South Tulsa and made a shocking discovery: a previously unknown outpost under Starfleet command.

The base has been operating from its distant location since 1963, unbeknownst to residents of the more civilized quadrant of Tulsa. “I’ve heard stories about that part of town, but I’ve never seen it myself,” admits Lotta Tribbles, a

freshman Religious Studies major.

“There’s this legend about a crazy religious university made of gold; wild tales of early curfews and repressed homosexuality. But I’ve always been skeptical.”

Tribbles says she needs to see it for herself, but thinks the discovery of the Starfleet base is a much more reasonable explanation.

Meanwhile, officials at the South Tulsa outpost are surprised that it has taken this long to have their presence acknowledged.

“Honestly, I thought everyone knew,” confessed Capt. James T. Kirk in an intimate interview in his quarters, “It’s not like they’ve tried to be inconspicuous. Have you seen the place? You can’t miss it, even from space. Sort of like my little captain.”

The interview was thus hastily concluded.

When reached with questions, Mister Spock grew pensive. “It seems an essential part of human nature,” he mused, “to only see what one wants to see; what one expects.” He then stared thoughtfully off screen for a few minutes.

While University officials are embarrassed at inadvertently spreading false tales of the mysterious other-worldly presence, many in the TU community are excited for the discovery and the new era it is sure to usher in.

“If this base has gone undetected by our sensors for years,” muses geology professor Val Cann, “just think what other wonders could be lurking in the unexplored reaches of Quadrant 918...”

The official Student Investment Fund has started up again for the year.

It offers students in the University of Tulsa’s Bloomberg Top 50 Collins College of Business the chance to manage a real investment fund which contains real money which is sure to have very real consequences.

Dr. Mona Poli of the Management Program offered, “It really gives our students a leg up in the real world to manage actual investment opportunities. We can’t expect our students to succeed if we don’t give them chances to royally mess up now.”

Dr. Poli did not comment as to whether the rumors that students were purposefully trying to engineer another economic bubble through the financial derivatives market were true.

She instead responded, “Our students have the highest gross pay of all students coming out of Oklahoma colleges and are in the top five for all southern colleges and universities.”

She went on to outline the reasons why TU’s business students are so successful. The classes that

proved to be the most effective, as determined by rigorous econometric analysis, were those that put students in market relevant situations.

Junior Marketing major Ruth Less avowed, “My favorite class so far is MKT 3283: Back Boardroom Analysis. I would never have known how to divide cocaine between me and six other CEOs without it. It also taught me who the most important person in any organization I might work for is— the investor. I now know how to properly subjugate my workers!”

It was later found that the money in the Student Investment Fund was culled, not from donations as had been implied earlier, but from Arts and Sciences students’ tuition.

Representatives of the Collins College say that it gives Fund members a sense of real urgency in making good investment decisions. When asked for his thoughts about the misappropriation of his money, sophomore art history student Phil Sopher implored, “I don’t know, man. How does one even job? I put on my job clothes and go to the job building.”

Sopher then proceeded to move his arms in a locked motion, similar to how one would perform the Robot. According to experts, this gesture was meant to suggest that working in businesses makes one into a robotic slave.

Building-student marriage legalized

A&S students find “jobs” Re-integration effort launched by well-intended engineers yields mixed results.

Matthew Magerkurth Currently Unemployed

After the long inquiry (see 16 September issue of the State-Run Media) by the Society of Investigation of Liberal Arts Majors (SILAM), liberal arts majors were finally definitively discovered last week.

Engineering and natural sciences (ENS) student Robert Reid, a new member of the group, describes the fateful day: “We staked out TUPAC for weeks and found nothing, but when one of the guys went around back to pee, we saw one. She was carrying a small case, and a small wooden thing was inside. We took her into custody for questioning.” Further inspection determined that the device inside the case was a violin, and interrogation revealed the community of liberal arts majors.

Finding these people was only half the job for SILAM, though.

The weeks following the discovery brought on a system of indoctrination and re-education for the liberal arts students, begin-

ning with the topic of jobs. Initial hopes for these unworldly students were high, but when a focus group was convened and the topic was named, the mysterious artsy creatures smiled, nodded and extolled their praise for the man but hatred of the movie by the same name.

When the directors of the re-education group explained that they didn’t mean Steve Jobs, baffled looks abounded in the room. One religion major asked if he meant Job from the Bible, but none comprehended the concept of working for a living. “Like, man, we’ve got to just keep our minds open and stuff’ll come our way, man,” said Seymour Pawt, a sophomore philosophy major. Oh, Seymour. If only you knew.

The job lecture was not the only part of the acclimation program, dubbed Liberal Arts Major Education (LAME). Next came the tour of Stephenson and Rayzor halls.

Most of the liberal arts students were baffled at the new halls. “I was unaware that there were buildings on campus that are younger than 30 years,” said Laura James, senior English major. The music majors in the crowd were amazed that there were buildings other than Lorton Performance Center.

Step three of the acclimation included a “second orientation”

for the shell-shocked students.

The LAME leaders set up an overnight stay inside Keplinger hall (Dry Gulch was out of the budget) and blared Daft Punk for 24 hours while many of the target students wandered around disoriented and confused.

One small group started to have a discussion on the metaphorical implications behind the orientation process, the music students found the nearest windows and stared amorously towards LPC, and an English major vanished only to be found six days and eight Stephen King books later. The LAME process was scheduled to have both a bridge-building competition and an oil trivia quiz, but those activities were cancelled for unknown reasons.

As the campus adjusts to having Liberal Arts Majors walking among its engineering masses, everyone should remember to welcome the aliens to the campus. We should share our land with them and be suitable hosts to our new guests. Though some may pray they don’t last long, the last thing we want is to provoke them. We don’t know what kind of power is held within the Liberal Arts Majors, and we shouldn’t be eager to find out.

Graphic by Anna Bennett

Thanks, Obama.

Anna Bennett Maid of Honor

Thanks to the Liberal Agenda, marriage between people and buildings has now been deemed constitutional. In light of this policy change, TU students are rushing to finally wed their lovers.

“We’ve been spending so much time together, I thought it was time to take this next step in our relationship,” gushes freshman Music Comp major Matt Magerkurth.

“I haven’t been seeing any other buildings; we do everything together. TUPAC has always been there for me, and now I can finally be there for TUPAC.” At press time, Matt was planning to move in with TUPAC. “It’s just more practical. I don’t think my new wife will fit into my dorm room.”

Not everyone is thrilled about Matt and TUPAC’s happily ever after. Senior Music Comp major Michael Paraskevas claims that he and the performing arts cen-

ter were already in a committed relationship. Paraskevas is heartbroken that TUPAC chose “the younger, fresher lover to spend her life with, despite the fact that I can provide for her better. Do my many years of dedication mean nothing to her?!”

Meanwhile, several dozen students are rushing to woo and wed Keplnger Hall, each certain that they are the most dedicated suitor.

Other engineering students seem to be losing interest in Kep. “Rayzor and Stephenson are both younger, hotter and more marriageable,” points out senior Mechanical Engineer Beth Geatches. There is currently speculation about the legality of building polygamy. “That would considerably lessen the competition,” says Geatches.

At press time, Harwell Hall is still single and looking, and Zink has been posting really passive-aggresive Facebook statuses about the whole thing.