Tucson Weekly 12/13/12

DECEMBER 13-19, 2012 VOL. 29, NO. 43

OPINION Tom Danehy 4 Irene Messina 6 Jim Hightower 6 Guest Commentary 8

CURRENTS The Hobbit is hobbled by poorly used technology and a weak storyline.

42

The Skinny 9

By Jim Nintzel

Polluting the Poor 9

By Tim Vanderpool

TEP’s coal plant keeps pumping out noxious gases Media Watch 10

By John Schuster

Health-Care Fight 11

By Jim Nintzel

The battle over abortion rights shifts to the courtroom Weekly Wide Web 12 Compiled by David Mendez

Police Dispatch 12

By Mariana Dale

Begging Game 13

By Mari Herreras

The next secretary of the interior of the United States of America.

In advance of TUSD’s schoolclosure vote, teachers, parents and students ask for mercy Grow, Tend, Eat? 14

By Megan Kimble

While school gardens have been blossoming for years, garden-to-cafeteria programs are just beginning to sprout Get Out of Town! 15 By the Usual Gang of Idiots and the readers of the Tucson Weekly

Our list of people, places and things for whom we’d like to buy a one-way ticket

2 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

Things I’m Done With In the spirit of our final Get Out of Town! issue, I thought I’d present a rant about several things that, as an editor, I wish would just go away: • People who are trekking across the country to raise awareness about (insert name of cause here).

While I appreciate that you’ve put your life on hold to Do Something Good, and while I am sure the cause you’re supporting or the message you’re promoting is very worthwhile, you are the 98,232nd person to use this particular trope.

Therefore, it’s not news. And we’re a newspaper. Ahem.

• People who get indignant when we decline to review their self-published book. There are some damn fine selfpublished books out there; that’s why we have “Writer’s Block,” our occasional online series that includes features on self-published books. However, we have only 52 bookreview slots, give or take, in the dead-tree version of the Tucson Weekly each year, so we restrict that to non-self-published books. Hey, give us a break: That’s several dozen more reviews of books than any other local media do per year.

• People who drop by the office without an appointment. I answer all of my emails, and I answer my phone when it rings, and I return all of my phone messages. In other words, I am accessible. Dropping by unannounced— especially on a Monday or a Tuesday, when we’re in the midst of 12-hour production days, give or take—is unnecessary, and I will be distracted and therefore unable to give you my full attention.

• People who accuse of us of being anti-local business when we criticize a local business. It’s our job to be a mirror, of sorts, to Tucson—and it’s our job to call ’em as we see ’em. Consider it tough love.

CULTURE

CHOW

City Week 24 Our picks for the week

Small Plates, Surreal Service 46

By Rita Connelly

TQ&A 26 Rachel Garman, Sexy Lady Bookworms

PERFORMING ARTS Not Quite a Match 34

By Sherilyn Forrester

ATC’s Emma will satisfy some, underwhelm others

COVER ILLUSTRATION BY JEFF DREW

Noshing Around 46

By Jerry Morgan

MUSIC Hard-Rock Revelry 55

By Gene Armstrong

Lady Sings the Blues 36

By Laura C.J. Owen

Arizona Onstage’s Lady Day brings Billie Holiday to life

VISUAL ARTS Art of the Season 37

By Margaret Regan

Gypsyhawk heads to Tucson for the first time—with riffs running against the grain Soundbites 55

By Stephen Seigel

Club Listings 57

A tour of downtown reveals numerous fine holidaythemed art treats

Nine Questions 60

BOOKS

Rhythm & Views 62

Stories in Sepia Tones 41

Live 61

By Margaret Regan

MEDICAL MJ

Ten years of research powers a compelling biography of a Western pioneer

The Wait Is Over 63

CINEMA Bilbo Bungle 42

By Colin Boyd

Peter Jackson’s return to Middle Earth is a huge disappointment Film Times 43 The Director 44

By Bob Grimm

JIMMY BOEGLE, Editor jboegle@tucsonweekly.com

Tapas Fusion’s ambition is admirable, but that’s not enough to fix a number of missteps

Hitchcock is an enjoyable but lightweight bit of cinema Now Showing at Home 45

By J.M. Smith

A functioning medicalmarijuana dispensary is finally open in Tucson

CLASSIFIEDS Comix 64-65 Free Will Astrology 64 ¡Ask a Mexican! 65 Savage Love 66 Personals 68 Employment 69 News of the Weird 70 Real Estate/Rentals 70 Mind, Body and Spirit 71 Crossword 71 *Adult Content 66-68

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DANEHY OPINION

Useful metrics including fried chicken, Padma Lakshmi and Mexican license plates might help determine if you’re a racist

WWW.TUCSONWEEKLY.COM P. O. BOX 27087, TUCSON, AZ 85726 (520) 294-1200

Thomas P. Lee Publisher

BY TOM DANEHY, tdanehy@tucsonweekly.com

EDITORIAL Jimmy Boegle Editor Dan Gibson Editor in Training Jim Nintzel Senior Writer Irene Messina Assistant Editor Mari Herreras Staff Writer Linda Ray City Week Listings David Mendez Web Producer Margaret Regan Arts Editor Stephen Seigel Music Editor Bill Clemens Copy Editor Tom Danehy, Renée Downing, Ryn Gargulinski, Randy Serraglio, J.M. Smith Columnists Colin Boyd, Bob Grimm Cinema Writers Rita Connelly, Jacqueline Kuder, Jerry Morgan Chow Writers Sherilyn Forrester, Laura C.J. Owen Theater Writers Mariana Dale, Inés Taracena Editorial Interns Noelle Haro-Gomez, Brooke Leigh Taffet Photography Interns Contributors Jacquie Allen, Gustavo Arellano, Gene Armstrong, Rob Brezsny, Max Cannon, Rand Carlson, Michael Grimm, Jim Hightower, Megan Kimble, David Kish, Keith Knight, Joshua Levine, Jim Lipson, Andy Mosier, Brian J. Pedersen, Dan Perkins, Ted Rall, Dan Savage, John Schuster, Chuck Shepherd, Eric Swedlund, Tim Vanderpool SALES AND BUSINESS Jill A’Hearn Advertising Director Monica Akyol Inside Sales Manager Laura Bohling, Michele LeCoumpte, Alan Schultz, David White Account Executives Jim Keyes Digital Sales Manager Beth Brouillette Business Manager Robin Taheri Business Office Florence Hijazi, Stephen Myers Inside Sales Representatives NATIONAL ADVERTISING VMG Advertising (888) 278-9866 or (212) 475-2529 PRODUCTION AND CIRCULATION Andrew Arthur Art Director Laura Horvath Circulation Manager Duane Hollis Editorial Layout Kristen Beumeler, Kyle Bogan, Jodi Ceason, Shari Chase, Chris De La Fuente, Anne Koglin, Adam Kurtz, Matthew Langenheim, Kristy Lee, Daniel Singleton, Denise Utter, Greg Willhite, Yaron Yarden Production Staff

Tucson Weekly® (ISSN 0742-0692) is published every Thursday by Wick Communications at 3280 E. Hemisphere Loop, Tucson, Arizona. Address all editorial, business and production correspondence to: Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087,Tucson, Arizona 85726. Phone: (520) 294-1200, FAX (520) 792-2096. First Class subscriptions, mailed in an envelope, cost $112 yearly/53 issues. Sorry, no refunds on subscriptions.

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D

uring the election, there was (thankfully) very little discussion of Mitt Romney’s religion, but quite a bit about Barack Obama’s race. The word racist got thrown around a lot, and I’ll admit that I brought up the subject of racism a few times myself.

I just couldn’t understand the level of hatred for the president. There’s simply no way that people could be that fired up about a crappy economy or even about socialism (which was wrongly applied to Obama by millions of people who don’t understand the term). There had to be an element of race in there somewhere.

Therefore, as the holidays approach, I offer this public service that might help you deal with those inner demons. Together, we will answer the question that asks: AM I AUTOMATICALLY A RACIST? • If I get really upset when I see a vehicle with Mexican plates blow by me going 80 mph on the freeway or 55 on Oracle Road?

Answer: No, you’re normal. That angers just about everybody. And don’t let those whiners from some group like Los Hermanos Sin Bardas Con Agua Para Tu Madre try to guilt you by claiming that you’re picking on Mexicans. I’m sure that we’d all be equally upset if we witnessed the same behavior from someone driving a car with plates from China or Cameroon or Diego Garcia. But you hardly ever see those in Tucson.

Plus, they can save all that crap about different cultures.

Go to their country and break the law, and see how nicely you get treated.

A friend of mine in law enforcement tells me that they don’t even bother stopping vehicles with Mexican plates, because they know that the tickets won’t get paid and/or the drivers won’t show up in court. Boy, it’s a good thing that information isn’t common knowledge among Mexican drivers.

• If I belong to the Tea Party?

Answer: No, but it probably helps.

• If I think that Megyn Kelly of Fox News is better-looking than Lucy Liu? Answer: That’s just different strokes. Besides, Lucy Liu ain’t all that. However, if you think that Megyn Kelly is better looking than Halle Berry, Jennifer Lopez, Grace Park and Padma Lakshmi, perhaps you might consider broadening your horizons.

However, if you think that Greta Van Susteren of Fox News is better looking than Halle Berry, Jennifer Lopez, Grace Park, and Padma Lakshmi, well …

• If I’m a right-wing radio talk show host and I use obvi-

RANDOM SHOTS By Rand Carlson

ously racial references and sound bites to get my gun-totin’, God-fearin’, Obama-hatin’ audience all riled up?

Answer: There’s no way of knowing, but you’re probably just a jerk, which is part of the job description for people in your line of work. The bigger the jerk, the bigger the audience.

What really kills me about these guys (and Tucson has at least two of them) is that they could play a sound bite from an episode of the old Amos ’n’ Andy TV show, and when a caller complained about the use of racial stereotypes, the host would say, “I never brought up race; you did!”

That doesn’t make the host a racist, but neither does it put him on the side of the angels.

(You’ll notice that I didn’t mention the Amos ’n’ Andy radio show, because the two actors on radio were both white doing exaggerated black voices.)

I tuned in the other day and caught one of the morning guys using the phrase “Obama phone,” as though there is some administration program handing out free cell phones in the inner city in exchange for votes, which is what deflated gasbag Rush Limbaugh claims. I don’t have a whole lot of space to go into it here, but please do yourself a favor, and look up the Lifeline program, which was the idea of Republican Sen. Bob Packwood back in 1983 and was quickly adopted by the administration of that conservative demigod, Ronald Reagan. It was designed to provide phone service to low-income households.

Yes, the Obama cell phone was originally the Reagan landline phone, funded through a surcharge on phone bills and administered through a nonprofit organization. Are there abuses of the program? Almost certainly. But when the program first began back in the 1980s in California, a spokesman for Pacific Bell told the Los Angeles Times that the company had no way of verifying the financial status of people who signed up for the free phone service, adding that several doctors were using the program.

So, if you talk-show guys want people to take your arguments seriously, maybe you should stop using low-brow stereotypes to lie to your audiences.

Now back to our regularly scheduled column.

• If I don’t even like the thought of fried chicken?

Answer: No, but you’re probably a vegan. At least a racist can be reasoned with. And they generally don’t smell funny.

• If I voted for Barack Obama strictly because he’s black?

Answer: Yes.

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MESSINA OPINION

Two collectors show there’s a lot more to black-velvet paintings than dogs playing poker HIGHTOWER

BY JIM HIGHTOWER

GENERAL ARMEY FADES AWAY

To see a slide show of selected black-velvet paintings from the Velveteria Museum, visit this column at www.TucsonWeekly.com.

BY IRENE MESSINA, imessina@tucsonweekly.com

O

n a jaunt to Bisbee in the late ’90s, Carl Baldwin and Caren Anderson made a discovery that put them on an unusual path: They wandered into a local shop and discovered a black-velvet painting of an African-American woman. She was nude, kneeling on a blanket and sporting a blue afro.

Baldwin and Anderson paid $29 for the painting and began traveling what they call “the velvet trail.”

Enchanted by the mysterious woman with the blue afro, the couple “started looking for (blackvelvet paintings) everywhere we went,” Anderson says. “In the beginning, we bought anything.”

Their collection grew to 50 paintings, displayed on the walls of their house.

Lightning’s flashing, winds are howling— and there’s a tempest in the Tea Party!

Why, it’s Dick Armey, the blowhard, former Republican majority leader, corporate lobbyist, Koch brothers’ retainer and commanding general of the Tea Party army.

Dick’s history has always been stormy. In 2002, he had an unpleasant split with his “We had some friends over, and they were mocking them fellow legislative hucksters, Newt Gingrich and ridiculing them,” Baldwin says. “I thought, ‘Wow! This and Tom DeLay, so he spun through gets quite a reaction.’ This would be good for a museum. We Congress’ revolving door right into the put our heads together and came up with the name K-Street lobbying hustle. In 2004, he Velveteria.” became honcho of a Koch-funded corporate Baldwin and Anderson continued collecting paintings front group with the spiffy name of from around the world. They opened the Velveteria FreedomWorks, an outfit that works by hook Museum on Dec. 11, 2005. It was a rainy day in Portland, and crook to “free” corporations from polluOre., and only two people came into the museum. tion rules, unions, taxes and other bothers.

However, as word spread about the museum, so did Then, in 2009, when angry Tea Partiers media attention. “A reporter from (a television station) in exploded onto the scene, Armey immediateSeattle called and said he wanted to do a piece on us. That ly rushed out to co-opt them, diverting their was our first interview,” Anderson says. leaders away from the group’s initial fury at The two were featured on Offbeat America on the HGTV Wall Street into a mob frenzy over Network. Anthony Bourdain of the Travel Channel stopped Obamacare and “big government.” This corby the museum. So did Andrew Zimmern. The couple met porate front man and lifelong Washington Cheech Marin. They even appeared on The Tonight Show insider essentially conscripted the helterwith Jay Leno. skelter bunch of outsiders into the Baldwin says they’ve met quite a few characters on the Republican Party by providing Koch money, velvet trail. A memorable one was Dr. Kitch—a former oral FreedomWorks political operatives—and even writing their “Tea Party Manifesto.” Slick!

Now, Dick’s dander is up THIS MODERN WORLD By Tom Tomorrow again, and he’s splitting from FreedomWorks. He resigned with a testy email prohibiting the organization “from using my name, image or signature in any way.” Like other ugly divorces, this one had its petty oddities.

For example, Armey’s email insisted that FreedomWorks must “deliver the copy of my official congressional portrait to my home.”

In case you’re worried about what’ll happen to poor Dick— don’t. To move Armey out as the general of today’s badly depleted Tea Party army, FreedomWorks will pay him $400,000 a year ... for the next 20 years! Like I said, “slick.”

surgeon from Pasadena, Calif. He lost his fortune and was living in a Dodge conversion van in the middle of the California desert. Baldwin purchased more than 200 paintings from Kitch.

Interesting things also happened at the museum.

Anderson recalls one young man who fell to the carpet, rolled around and moaned, “I could stay here forever.”

Another day, a woman exclaimed that she wanted to be buried there. A young couple from Austin, Texas, got engaged in the museum’s black-light room.

Some of Baldwin and Anderson’s experiences are highlighted in their book, Black Velvet Masterpieces: Highlights From the Collection of the Velveteria Museum.

While doing research for the book, Anderson found a lot of background on black-velvet paintings.

“There’s so much history that people don’t understand,” she says. “They were (making the paintings) in the early 1900s on silk velvet in Japan. … In the Vietnam era, GIs would bring them back from their R&R in the Philippines. … In the ’60s and ’70s, Mexico (painters) made a lot of border art. … To us, it’s not just about the paintings. There’s so much rich history … of popular culture.

“It takes a lot of skill to paint on black velvet. The finer paintings have seven layers. They paint one layer and let it dry and then build up. It’s like watercolors where you can’t really go over your mistakes,” Anderson says.

The book highlights a variety of subject matter to reflect different cultures. There are nudes from Polynesia, Native Americans in full headdress, U.S. presidents, soldiers in Vietnam, leaders of the civil rights movement, popular musicians—and unicorns, clowns and animals. Some painters copied famous works by Rembrandt, Degas, Leonardo da Vinci and Michelangelo. Baldwin and Anderson say Jesus is one of the most-painted figures— followed by Elvis.

While some might turn their nose up at anything on black velvet, Baldwin and Anderson don’t seem to let that bother them. They closed their museum in January 2010 and look forward to showing some of their 3,000 paintings at more traveling shows, including the Lubbock (Texas) Arts Festival in April. They also want to open a museum in Southern California.

After that, who knows where the velvet trail will take them?

Black-velvet paintings of Jesus and the Virgin Mary are on display as part of The Christmas Event exhibition at Hilltop Art Gallery, 730 N. Hilltop Drive, in Nogales. The gallery is open from 12:30 to 4:30 p.m., Tuesday through Sunday. Call (520) 287-5515 for more information. To read more about Baldwin and Anderson’s collection, visit velveteria.com.

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OPINION

When a school closes, the community that’s left behind begins to crumble

BY ALAN VOELKEL

“

I

f you close our school, you will destroy our community.” These arresting words became a repeated refrain at a packed Catalina Magnet High School auditorium for parents and students begging the Tucson Unified School District governing board not to close their school.

The “no more pencils, no more books” playground doggerel of yesteryear stands in stark contrast to the pathetic sight of today’s youth imploring adults to spare their school. Strange times.

You have to pity the board members. They surely did not run for office in order to destroy Tucson communities. Nevertheless, they are charged with closing schools to help defray an anticipated $17 million budget deficit for next year thrust upon TUSD by the state Legislature’s drastic cuts to education, and the refusal of the electorate to pass Proposition 204.

I suspect it is true that what is left of the communities these schools serve will be destroyed. There was a time in the not-too-distant past when neighbors had many contexts to interact meaningfully with each other. They stood in line waiting for buses, attended the local church, purchased items at a local corner store, or greeted each other on hot evenings as they sat on their porches fanning themselves … all archaic customs undone by our automotive culture, air conditioning and the Internet. The porches are still there, but they are empty, and the local school is the last institution where neighbors routinely gather to enjoy school sporting events together, interact at PTA meetings, work in the community school garden and cheer their kids on at school functions. Now this, too, is on the auction block.

In our brave new world where test scores reign supreme, the value of “community” is an intangible that does not factor in as a calculation for the board to consider. Not that there aren’t measures that derive directly from it. Community violence, crime, suicide, childhood obesity, theft and vandalism are all measurable outcomes from the loss of community—and it’s no mystery why some of these are on the rise. For those of us who work at the community schools that still remain (some of them, like Wakefield Middle School, so iconic that they actually lend their name to the entire community), you catch a vision of what once was. The generations stroll by our school garden in the afternoon, asking to pick a few chiles from our bushes for dinner, swapping stories about what the school was like when they attended, and asking whether a favorite teacher still works there.

Drivers beep their horns when passing by—oh, yes, a former student saying hello. If something is out of order, neighbors call the school to let us know.

Our Legislature’s vision is that these venerable community schools be replaced by specialized niche charter schools. As good as some of those are academically, they are a dim shadow of what the old community school signified to the surrounding community.

You spot these new charter schools housed in old storefronts sheathed in plywood in converted strip malls, with the children playing on a patch of parking lot fenced off by cyclone wire for a playground.

Kids come from all over the city, and head home at the end of the day to insular bubbles connected only by Internet chat.

Meanwhile, across the street, the magnifi-

cent facilities and grounds of the deceased community school are boarded up or sold to developers. Is this what our civilization has come to?

One has to wonder at the irony of socalled family-values “conservatives” in the Legislature becoming the driving force behind this movement to destroy these wonderful and irreplaceable community institutions. Tragically, once they are gone, they are gone forever.

Alan Voelkel spent 10 years working in the field of community development and education in underprivileged communities. Since 1990, he’s taught at Wakefield Middle School in TUSD, currently as the journalism teacher and as the director of communications and special projects for the Lapan College Club.

CURRENTS

THE SKINNY

TEP’s southside coal plant keeps on pumping out noxious gases

EXPANDING AHCCCS

Polluting the Poor he coal pile rises like a black tide, spreading long and deep in the flats along Interstate 10. If Tucson Electric Power has its way, this fuel will eventually feed the Sundt Generating Station, contributing to a haze in our skies and, according to two new reports, more death and illness in the predominantly poor, mostly minority communities that surround it.

“The coal you can see stockpiled from I-10, they want to burn it,” says Tucson-based Sierra Club organizer Dan Millis. “We want to keep it on the ground, and out of Tucson’s lungs.”

Unfortunately, that may not happen anytime soon. Due to the plant’s age (the Arizona Department of Environmental Quality concluded that it came online in 1962), Sundt, at 3950 E. Irvington Road, has been exempted from requirements to install costly, emissions-cutting upgrades. The rationale is that those upgrades are unnecessary for plants nearing the end of their productive lives.

The Sierra Club and other groups have questioned that exemption from the state’s haze-rule implementation plan, and called upon the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency to review the ADEQ decision.

“The plant should be held to more-stringent standards,” says Millis, adding that representatives from environmental groups have met with TEP “to see what we can do to get fewer emissions in our air.”

In the meantime, the Sierra Club and other groups want the Sundt generator to switch from coal to natural gas—which it is equipped to do—and save that enormous black pile as an emergency reserve.

Calls to TEP spokesman Joe Salkowski for comment on the Sundt generator were not returned. But two recent reports speak volumes about the toxicity of this plant in Tucson.

One is from the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People, and the other from the Union of Concerned Scientists. Both rank Sundt high on a national list of outdated coal burners that need to be shut down.

According to the Union report, Ripe for Retirement: The Case for Closing America’s Costliest Coal Plants, 42 percent of our nation’s electricity last year was generated by coal-burning plants like Sundt. And like Sundt, more than three-quarters of those plants have outlived their 30-year life spans.

“Most are inefficient,” says the report, “operating far below both their power generation potential. … They lack essential modern pollution controls,” it continues, “so they damage public health. The sulfur they emit causes acid

T

rain. The mercury they release poisons waterways and fish and causes neurological damage in children. … The soot they emit creates smog that causes lung disease, premature death, and triggers asthma attacks. … Burning coal demands billions of gallons of cooling water from vulnerable rivers and lakes, and leaves behind vast quantities of toxic ash residuals, while coal-mining causes extensive and lasting damage both to human health and the natural environment.”

The report goes on to describe coal-fired power plants as “our nation’s largest single source of heat-trapping carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions, the primary contributor to global warming.”

And according to the NAACP report, the burden of living with dirty old plants like Sundt disproportionately affects minority neighborhoods. While Rachel Carson’s groundbreaking 1962 book Silent Spring helped prod America out of its apathy regarding toxic pollutants, that shift did not immediately filter down to working-class minority communities.

There was an awakening in 1982, however, when African-American residents in one rural North Carolina community learned that the toxin polychlorinated biphenyl was being dumped in a nearby landfill. Their outrage resulted in massive civil disobedience and more than 500 arrests. Today’s powerful environmental-justice movement is largely attributed to that watershed event.

With the publication of the NAACP’s Coal Blooded: Putting Profits Before People, that movement is now turning its attention to dirty, aging plants such as Sundt, and highlighting the health toll they exact on surrounding, oftenminority communities.

The study looked at 378 coal-fired plants across the country, evaluating their impacts upon minorities and the poor. It also singled out a dozen companies for an “F” rating based on their poor performance in relation to socialand environmental-justice issues.

Among those failing companies was UNS Energy, the parent company of Tucson Electric Power. Like the others, UNS was targeted for having a coal plant “sited … in densely populated areas with high proportions of low-income people and people of color.”

The Sundt plant certainly fits that bill.

According to the report, it emits more than 2,000 tons of sulfur dioxide and 1,400 tons of nitrogen oxide each year into the air over some of Tucson’s poorest minority neighborhoods.

Another study, published by the Clean Air Task Force in 2010, concluded that pollution from

TIM VANDERPOOL

BY TIM VANDERPOOL, tvanderpool@tucsonweekly.com

Dan Millis: “The plant should be held to more-stringent standards.”

Sundt is responsible for six heart attacks, 68 asthma attacks and four deaths each year.

Yet the plant continues burning coal, and polluting neighborhoods that lack the clout to stop it.

“Often, you find there’s more political power in communities that aren’t low income, or communities of color,” says Jacqui Patterson, director of the NAACP’s Climate Justice Initiative and a co-author of the study.

As a result, polluting plants are “disproportionately in communities of color and lowincome communities,” Patterson says. “One reason is that property values tend to be lower in areas that have toxic facilities. When someone is low-income, they would look to buy in a place that has lower property costs.”

The other factor, she says, “is that political piece, in terms of not having the political power to be able to fight to get something out of the community.”

Those communities subsequently suffer from what Patterson calls “clusters” of health concerns. For instance, “across the board, you’ll see higher rates of asthma,” she says. “AfricanAmerican children are three times as likely to go into the hospital from asthma, and twice as like to die from it.”

Patterson says tighter federal regulations are in the pipeline. “But meanwhile, these plants have been spewing out toxins for years. How many lives have been lost or compromised without those standards?”

FRANK

One of the biggest decisions facing state lawmakers is whether to expand the state’s AHCCCS rolls to include people who earn up to 133 percent of the federal poverty level.

It’s a key element of the Affordable Care Act’s effort to get low-income Americans covered by health insurance. As the bill was originally written, states had no choice but to opt in to the expansion, because they’d lose all their federal Medicaid dollars if they did not.

But the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that requiring the states to expand the Medicaid program was too coercive, so states can decide whether to participate.

There’s a considerable financial incentive attached in the form of hundreds of millions of federal dollars available to pay for the program.

This week, Secretary of Health and Human Services Kathleen Sebelius wrote to state governors to tell them that it’s an all-or-nothing deal: If they want the federal dollars, they must expand all the way to 133 percent of the federal poverty level.

In Arizona, the Joint Legislative Budget Committee staff projected that the state would have to pony up about a billion dollars between now and 2020, but would receive about $14.7 billion in matching federal funds.

That’s a darn good return on investment. It ensures that the poorest of Arizona residents get health-care coverage. The state’s hospitals and clinics are no longer seeing a lot of unbilled patients jamming up emergency rooms, because they have no other options for health care.

Nonetheless, we get a sense that the conservative Republicans who run the state aren’t going to embrace the opportunity, for a number of reasons: They hate the idea of supporting Obamacare in any fashion; they have a philosophical opposition to government spending in general; and they fear that the federal government will not continue to provide the matching funds in the future.

Or, as outgoing state Sen. Frank Antenori put it last week: There’s “not a snowball’s chance in hell” that the expansion is going to happen.

While lawmakers are likely to balk, there’s a chance that Arizona citizens might be able to make it happen through the initiative process.

In order to do that, though, initiative-backers will have to find a funding mechanism that could bring in a couple hundred million dollars a year in taxes that the voters will support.

One obvious choice: Some kind of bed tax on hospitals. The hospitals might be agreeable to such a plan, given that they’ll get much more back from a program that ensures they’ll have patients who can pay their bills.

The downside is that the next available chance to vote on such an initiative would be 2014, which means

CONTINUED ON PAGE 11 DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

9

MEDIA WATCH

BY JOHN SCHUSTER jschuster@tucsonweekly.com

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Choose Well

BLAKE ENDS QUARTERCENTURY TENURE AT KOLD During her nearly 25-year run at KOLD Channel 13, Mindy Blake became one of the most-recognized and most-popular anchors in local television news.

Her role at the station concludes Friday, Dec. 14. “I just got to a point in my life where I wanted to do other things,� said Blake, who will become the Amphitheater School District’s communications director in January. “I’ve been in broadcasting since I graduated from college. I’ve been very fortunate that I’ve had the same career that I’ve loved, and I still love, but I want to try something else. I want to (have) a positive impact on the community and give back. I had been thinking about it for a while. My children went to Amphi schools, and the opportunity came up, and I thought this could be for me.�

Given the nomadic world of broadcasting, people don’t generally enter the profession with their sights set on one location—and Tucson didn’t seem like it would be a long-term gig for Blake. “When we came to Tucson almost 25 years ago, we thought, ‘Oh, we’ll be here for two years and then move back to Colorado, and work in Denver,’� Blake said. “But the city and Mindy Blake people here made it very easy to stay. So here I am, and I worked about every show and shift at the station.

I’ve enjoyed every part of it.�

Occasional changes in the schedule helped lead to her lengthy tenure. “I always had opportunities to grow here, and that’s what kept me here,� Blake said. “There were always new challenges at the station in terms of anchoring different shows. News can be different every day. You don’t know what’s going to happen when you walk through that door, and you have to be prepared for it. I was in positions where I could do that, and do live reports.�

In an internal memo announcing Blake’s move, KOLD news director Michelle Germano referred to Blake as a “newsroom leader� and “mentor� to many in the department. Those traits came to the fore during coverage of the Jan. 8, 2011, mass shooting. “Jan. 8 was an example where we all came together, (with) nobody expecting anything like that would ever happen in Tucson,� Blake said. “When it did, we all kicked into gear and used our journalistic roots. (You) start from there and get the information out, and that’s the most important thing.�

Blake also reflected on the many newsmakers she has spoken with along the way. “I’ve had the opportunity to meet and interview so many interesting people over the years, from musicians to politicians,� she said. “One year, I was sent to

Washington, D.C., to cover the free-trade agreement. I ran into Ross Perot and interviewed him, and Ted Kennedy. That was eyeopening, being in the nation’s capital during such a huge event.

Blake said the highlight of her career was covering Mother Teresa’s visit to Phoenix in 1989. “She had a gathering at the airport. We were far away from her, and the children from one of her orphanages were gathered around her, and my photographer and I stayed back and got the pictures we needed,� Blake said. “She handed something to a little boy and pointed to where we were, and that little boy made his way back to where we were and handed me a St. Christopher medal that she gave to him to give to me. I still have that. To have that opportunity was really incredible.�

JEFFRIES DOING DOUBLE DUTY When the UA football and men’s basketball schedules overlap at this time of the year, there’s always the possibility that the teams will have games on the same day. And while Brian Jeffries is a talented play-by-play broadcaster, he hasn’t quite perfected the concept of cloning himself. So when there’s an overlap, Jeffries usually has to choose one of the games, and then find someone to cover the other sport.

In 2008, when the Arizona football team went to a bowl game for the first time in a decade, Jeffries had the good fortune of broadcasting a UA basketball and football game in the same city. That was in Las Vegas. Arizona faced UNLV on the hardwood in the early afternoon, then knocked off BYU’s football team on a cold night at the Las Vegas Bowl.

But when both teams play on the same day in different cities, it’s a bit tougher, which might make this Saturday, Dec. 15, something of a first: Jeffries plans on broadcasting a UA football game and a UA basketball game that day—and doing it in two different states.

The Arizona football team kicks off the bowl season Saturday at 11 a.m. in the Gilden New Mexico Bowl in Albuquerque.

Depending on the length of the game and his postgame responsibilities, Jeffries could be on the air past 3 p.m. However, he should have enough time to get back to Tucson on a charter flight and be ready to broadcast the biggest game on the basketball team’s nonconference schedule—an 8 p.m. matchup with No. 5 Florida at McKale Center. The network pregame show begins at 7.

Both games will be broadcast on UA flagship radio station KCUB 1290 AM and KHYT 107.5 FM. Should you be a true glutton for all things Wildcats, Rob Lantz, Brad Allis and myself will begin our football pregame coverage at 7 a.m. on 1290, gab for a few hours between the football and basketball games, and return for a nightcap that should keep us on the air until about 1 a.m.

Give us a call, and say hello if you’re out and about. We may need the company.

CURRENTS

THE SKINNY CONTINUED

The battle over abortion rights shifts from the campaign trail to the courtroom

from Page 9

Health-Care Fight

Arizona will be forgoing a big chunk of cash between now and then.

CLOGGING MARANA’S SEWER PLANS

BY JIM NINTZEL, jnintzel@tucsonweekly.com ov. Jan Brewer’s decision to have the federal government, rather than the state, set up a health-care exchange means that state lawmakers will avoid a new battle this year over abortion and contraception coverage.

While details about the insurance plans that will be available are still sketchy, state lawmakers will not have a say over whether abortion or contraception coverage is included in the private plans that consumers will be able to purchase though the exchanges, which will be online marketplaces where consumers can compare and purchase insurance plans.

While Republican lawmakers will miss the opportunity to further restrict reproductive rights, they have passed a remarkable number of restrictions over the last four years.

Women in rural Arizona now have to travel to Tucson or Maricopa County to get an abortion.

They have to plan on staying at least overnight, since they now have to meet with a physician and have an ultrasound examination at least 24 hours before the procedure. A nurse practitioner can no longer provide the state-mandated information about abortion; instead, a physician must do it. A medical abortion induced by pills must now follow the same regulations as surgical abortion.

The ability of a minor to get an abortion without parental consent has been sharply curtailed. And employers with a religious affiliation can refuse to offer birth control as part of their health-insurance plan.

“Well over a dozen significant restrictions have been passed over the last four years,” says Bryan Howard, the executive director of Planned Parenthood of Arizona.

Two Arizona laws passed earlier this year remain on hold while federal courts decide whether they’re constitutional.

One law, the Mother’s Health and Safety Act, would prevent abortion in the 20th week of pregnancy or later. During hearings on the bill, a physician testified that some serious birth defects aren’t detected until that point in the pregnancy, giving women little time to decide whether to have an abortion or carry a child to term who will die shortly after delivery.

The Center for Reproductive Rights, representing three Arizona obstetrician-gynecologists, has filed suit against the law. The case gets right to the limits set by Roe v. Wade regarding how states can regulate abortion. Center for Reproductive Rights attorneys argue that the state can regulate, but not ban abortion before a fetus is viable; attorneys for the state argue that limiting abortion to situations where the mother’s life is in danger after 20 weeks of pregnancy

G

Gov. Jan Brewer: Ready to rumble for health care. constitutes a regulation and not a ban.

U.S. District Court Judge James Teilborg refused to block the law in July, but his decision was overturned by the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals, which enjoined the law from going into effect. Last month, attorneys for the state asked the appeals court lift that injunction; the court has yet to rule.

Howard says he wouldn’t be surprised to see the case go the U.S. Supreme Court as a vehicle to overturn Roe v. Wade.

The second state law that’s tied up in the courts would block Planned Parenthood from receiving any federal health-care dollars that pass through the state, even for services that are not associated with abortion, such as pap smears, cancer screenings and birth-control services.

Planned Parenthood filed suit to block that law, saying that federal law did not allow the state to block funding for a qualified health-care provider based on the fact that it also provided abortion services. U.S. District Court Judge Neil Wake issued an injunction against the law; last month, Arizona appealed that ruling to the 9th Circuit.

The Obama administration has filed briefs opposing the state’s position.

Howard says that the GOP’s efforts to chip away at abortion rights are costing them votes among women.

“Access to preventative health care—and women’s health care, specifically—is not some intellectual or political argument for the vast majority of American women,” Howard says. “It’s basic health care that they’re consuming every month of every year.”

Republicans lost four seats in the Arizona Senate and four seats in the Arizona House in November’s election. In the Senate, Republicans now hold a 17-13 advantage, rather than the 21-member supermajority they had over the last two years.

“In terms of repairing the damage that’s been done to access to women’s health care over the last four years, progress was made that was necessary but not sufficient,” Howard says about the recent Arizona elections.

The opposition to abortion rights and hostility to Planned Parenthood had an impact on the federal level, too, says Howard. He points to Mitt Romney’s failure to win over women in last month’s presidential election after he promised to end any federal funding for Planned Parenthood.

“We absolutely saw the gender gap play a role in President Obama’s re-election,” Howard says.

Comments about pregnancy, rape and abortion also sank the hopes of Republican Senate candidates Todd Akin in Missouri, and Richard Mourdock in Indiana.

“These were serious red states that elected Democrats because of the outlandishness and the disconnect,” Howard says. “While reproductive health care might not be the first thing in an exit poll that somebody cites about why they voted the way that they did, a candidate’s position on access to health care makes a statement about their values. And women voters in particular will interpret: ‘This candidate gets me,’ or, ‘This candidate doesn’t understand me or how I’m living or what my life is like … so I can’t trust him to do the right thing on the economy, either.’”

Pima County won a big round in its legal battle with the town of Marana last week when the Arizona Supreme Court declined to overrule an appealscourt decision regarding a wastewatertreatment plant.

Pima County built the plant, but Marana has been coveting it, because they want the potential water credits that come with being able to recharge the wastewater that comes out of the plant.

Marana has tried a variety of legal strategies to seize the plant, but Pima County has outmaneuvered the town in court. We won’t get into the nitty-gritty, but the basic outcome of this case means that Marana will have to hold an election to determine whether the town can run the plant.

On top of that, there’s a question of whether the town has legal authority under federal law to operate a sewer plant.

Right now, the plant is in the hands of Marana thanks to another state law that allowed the town to take over the plant by promising to pay off the remaining bonds on the facility. Pima County is also challenging that law in a separate lawsuit; county officials say that if Marana is going to take over the sewer plant, they should be on the hook for its full value, not just the bonds that are owed on it.

County officials also warn that Marana residents are going to see their sewer bills rise if the town is successful, because it will cost Marana more to run the plant as a separate entity than it will cost Pima County to keep it as part of the regional system. Marana officials maintain that they can keep costs at the current levels.

ACORN STRIKES AGAIN! In the wake of last month’s election, Public Policy Polling has moved from polling about campaigns to polling about how many people believe in crazy and nonexistent stuff.

The Democratic-leaning firm released a poll last week showing that half of the nation’s Republicans believe that ACORN stole the election on behalf of President Barack Obama.

PPP’s Tom Jensen notes that a similar question in 2008 showed that 52 percent of Republicans believed ACORN had stolen the election, “so this is a modest decline, but perhaps smaller than might have been expected given that ACORN doesn’t exist anymore.”

In fiscal-cliff news, the polling firm looked in on the public’s attitudes about the Simpson-Bowles deficit-

CONTINUED ON PAGE 13 DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

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POLICE DISPATCH

W E E K LY W I D E W E B

BY MARIANA DALE mailbag@tucsonweekly.com

MAKE-OUT MISHAP NOV. 22, 12:14 P.M. NORTH SHANNON ROAD

A midday make-out session in a public park led to a drug paraphernalia citation, according to a report from the Pima County Sheriff’s Department.

An anonymous caller reported a couple having sex on the bleachers at the park.

When a deputy arrived at the scene, he found a man and a woman standing near the bleachers.

The woman denied they’d had sex. She told the deputy that she and the man had only been making out and that their clothes remained on the entire time.

The deputy, who recognized the woman from a previous encounter, inquired about her backpack and whether she might have anything illegal inside it.

The deputy searched the backpack and found a purse inside that had a small plastic bag, like those used to store illegal drugs, sticking out of it. The woman said she had just picked up the backpack from an ex-boyfriend’s house and didn’t know what was inside it.

Upon opening the bag, the deputy found hypodermic needles and a white glass pipe with burn marks and a powdery substance coating it.

The woman acknowledged that it was a drug kit but denied ownership. She claimed her ex-boyfriend was a drug-dealer and must have planted the kit to “fuck me over.”

The woman said she had not used meth in a few months. When the deputy cited her for possession of drug paraphernalia, she said, “I figured this would happen.”

CAMPUS JOY RIDE DEC. 2, 5:44 P.M. UA CAMPUS

A man was arrested with a blood-alcohol content more than twice the legal limit after he drove his car into a University of Arizona courtyard, according to a UA Police Department report.

A student studying in the Bio Sciences East building reported that a vehicle was driving in the courtyard and “running into things.”

An officer found the vehicle, which had fresh scrape marks on the paint, parked on a pedestrian/bicycle path. He also observed tire tracks on the bicycle path, nearby stairs and some low concrete walls.

Scrape marks on those matched the color of the vehicle’s paint.

When the officer asked the driver if he had been drinking, the driver responded, “Yes. I’ve been drinking all afternoon.”

The man had a flushed face and smelled of intoxicants. He said that his arthritic knees prevented him from performing the “walk and turn” sobriety test.

A breath test showed that the man’s blood-alcohol level was well above the 0.08 percent limit. He was taken to the UA police station for more testing and cited for DUI. He also was given a traffic citation.

12 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

Show Us Your GIFs! e’re running an animated GIF contest, in part because we want to celebrate the city that we love—and in part because we dig animated GIFs. For some strange reason, GIFs have been making a comeback in recent years, despite the fact that they’re short; they can choke bandwidth; and they lack sound. Yet something about the way in which they can convey information, beauty and/or humor in short, looping bursts makes them emblematic of today’s instant streaming Internet.

I mean, what’s more instantaneous than getting directly to the funniest, mostimpactful part of a video without having to click a play button? This way, I don’t have to sit through 15 seconds of build-up waiting for a cat to rear back on its hind legs and dance, nor do I need to wait around for the Toronto Raptors mascot to flail about on rollerblades before landing snout-first on the hardwood of a basketball court.

But the coolest GIFs as of late have come from the rise of Cinemagraphs, where creators take an image and animate one aspect of it, looping it together seamlessly to create an illusion of video where there is none—the image of a woman’s skirt ruffling in the wind, or of a taxi seen in a reflection, driving past a café window.

Those are the kinds of things we want to see, Tucson: the beauty of a breeze blowing through the trees on Mount Lemmon; the simple pleasure of people enjoying drinks in downtown’s outdoor establishments; the humor of the various denizens of Fourth Avenue; or even a clip of Wildcat athletes doing something amazing (or embarrassing).

We want it all, Tucson: the beauty, the glory, the humor and the absurdity.

Send us your best by clicking on the “Contests” link on TucsonWeekly.com. And remember: We’ve got prizes waiting for you, so show us your GIFs!

W

—David Mendez, Web Producer dmendez@tucsonweekly.com

COMMENT OF THE WEEK “GOODTYMEZ WERE HAD BY all!!!! I shud no, i am BlazinBill, The BASS PLAYER for ‘BAD TOWNE.’ Good show guys. Thank u to ALL THAT CAME out 2 c the bandz.”

—TucsonWeekly.com user “Bill Tully” thanks fans for coming out to the show featuring Funky Bonz, Hillbilly Bo, Heart Attack Shack and Bad Towne on Thursday, Nov. 10, in a way that only he can (Live music listing, Nov. 10).

BEST OF WWW Jimmy Boegle’s review of Main Gate Square’s The Fix last week wasn’t an evisceration by any means, but to say that it was positive would be incorrect.

Comments sprinkled in, with a few nodding their heads, and a few telling him he’s wrong.

Then came a deluge of comments wondering why the Weekly is tearing down local businesses etc.

Interestingly, all of them came from the same IP address.

Don’t do that, folks. If you have something to say, say it from one username and one email address. We’ll respect you for that, and we’ll leave your disagreement to shine on in perpetuity— unlike the critiques mentioned above, which have been pulled.

THE WEEK ON OUR BLOGS

NEW ONLINE THIS WEEK

On The Range, we shared a terrifying story about the beef industry; watched a new episode of Web series Hopped Up; got hyped up for The Hobbit with Portland’s bagpiping, unicycling Gandalf the Grey; noted the new executive director of Wingspan, Carol Grimsby; gave you a few reasons why the modern streetcar might actually help downtown businesses; acknowledged our insignificance compared to Google and Facebook on the Internet map; started playing games of Letterpress; freaked out about Mike Tyson: Undisputed Truth, coming to Centennial Hall; announced our animated GIF contest; and so much more!

On We Got Cactus, we reveled in the magic of DMX’s “Rudolph the RedNosed Reindeer” interpretation; got excited about the Fleetwood Mac show coming to Phoenix; took five to lament the death of Dave Brubeck; congratulated Jason Willis’ inclusion into the Sundance Film Festival; watched terrible holiday videos; cancelled everything to buy tickets for Purple Reign; and more!

Are you ready for the Great Cover-Up?

Tucson, movies and GIFs!

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CURRENTS

THE SKINNY CONTINUED

In advance of TUSD’s school-closure vote on Dec. 20, teachers, parents and students ask for mercy

from Page 11

Begging Game

reduction plan. The result: 23 percent of Americans support Simpson-Bowles, while 16 percent oppose it, and 60 percent don’t have an opinion.

But here comes the sad part: PPP also polled Americans about the Panetta-Burns plan, “a mythical Clinton chief of staff/former Western Republican Senator combo we conceived of to test how many people would say they had an opinion even about something that doesn’t exist,” explains Jensen.

A quarter of the respondents had an opinion about the fictional Panetta/ Burns plan, which didn’t poll as well as Simpson-Bowles: Only 8 percent of Americans supported it, while 17 percent were opposed.

BY MARI HERRERAS, mherreras@tucsonweekly.com t public hearings on possible school closures, the Tucson Unified School District governing board listened as teachers, parents and students begged the board to keep their schools open.

The district has a projected $17 million deficit, and enrollment has been declining since 2000, going from about 60,000 students to 50,000. School closures and consolidations are expected to address less than half of the shortfall. Nonetheless, the board approved a final list of 14 schools to consider closing at a special meeting on Nov. 27. Two public hearings, on Dec. 8 and 10, allowed for more public comment, and the board will meet again on Thursday, Dec. 20, for a final vote.

Kerry Hodgkinson, the parent of a student at Brichta Elementary School and president of the school’s Parent-Teacher Organization, told the board at the Dec. 8 meeting that it needed to clean its “own house first,” before closing schools.

“As a mom who has to feed a family of five on $50 a week, I can do a lot better job than your budget analyst,” she said.

Carla Dugin reminded the board of a promise TUSD made to Carson Middle School.

“We were told that we would be safe, and closure would not be talked about for three years.

Now it’s under two years, and here we are,” she said, referring to a previous round of school closures. “We teach our kids to keep their word; why can’t we ask the same from TUSD. … If you close Carson, you will lose my faith in the district. And my son, he will no longer be a student at TUSD.” Hundreds of teachers, parents and students filled the Catalina Magnet High School auditorium to capacity for the Dec. 8 meeting. Some parents and teachers at that meeting questioned the criteria for school closures approved by the board. The criteria includes a lack of success in attracting more students, low academic performance, weak prospects for turnaround in enrollment or academic performance, and the availability of nearby schools to take more students.

“It’s not in the best interest of the district,” one parent told the board about the possibility of closing Sewell Elementary School, which has a B rating from the Arizona Department of Education. “Sewell has consistent academic success (and) enrichment programs. … It attracts students; 40 percent are open-enrolled, because parents want their children to attend a quality school.”

Cesar Aguirre, who had spoken to the board before as an advocate for Ochoa Elementary School, which narrowly escaped previous clo-

A

DECK THE TOWN HALL

MARI HERRERAS

STEVE

Teachers, parents and students beg for mercy at the Dec. 8 TUSD public hearing. board member Michael Hicks attended a meeting sure lists, told board members that the closure at Brichta Elementary and told parents that he process presented to the public felt fake. The planned to vote “no” on all the possible school board began by announcing it might need to closures. Hicks said he does not agree with the close 30 schools. Then the number shrank to 20 criteria used by the administration in determinschools, and now it stands at 14. ing closures and described it as “politics.”

“If you close seven or nine schools, the mass“I don’t believe the criteria were good and es are going to be happy,” Aguirre said. “But sound,” he said. “At times, it seemed like they don’t be fooled, people. I believe (the district picked a school out of their back pocket.” spends) more than any other district in the state Hicks said TUSD should look at developing on administration,” he continued, asking why more district-run charter schools, adding an the district didn’t start cutting administrative average of two more students per classroom costs rather than closing schools first. throughout the district, and adopting a year“You continue to target schools in high-povround school year. erty neighborhoods, and all westside schools,” The purpose of the meeting was to help Aguirre said, referring to the Menlo Park, Brichta parents organize for the public hearings.

Manzo and Brichta elementary schools, which Brichta parent Stephanie Hamilton said parents are all on the current closure list. have formed the Brichta Community Action No indication was given during the public hearings how the board’s final vote will transpire Network to develop alternatives for the district.

Hamilton said most parents want to keep at the Dec. 20 meeting. TUSD board president neighborhood schools open, and the general Miguel Cuevas made it clear at the Dec. 8 hearing that the board was there to listen to commu- feeling is that the district’s proposal for school closures came out of nowhere. nity members and that board members would “We need to work together to give the district not comment that day. other alternatives,” she said.

But a few days earlier, on Tuesday, Dec. 4,

Tucson City Councilman Steve Kozachik is cooking up a cross between a town hall and a roast to start the new year.

The Koz has invited local politicians who are connected to his midtown Ward 6 to come together from 7 to 9 p.m., Monday, Jan. 7, to talk about the issues facing the community. To liven up the event, he’s tapped Arizona Daily Star cartoonist Dave Fitzsimmons to emcee.

Kozachik says he’s trying to rekindle some of the goodwill that people on both sides of the political aisle embraced following the shooting rampage on Jan. 8, 2011.

“It is my sense that the combined effect of politics, outside/big money and the passage of time (has led to us) drifting back to the polarized bickering that prevents us from solving some of our fundamental community issues,” Kozachik says in a bulletin.

His plan is “a combination of some light sautéing of the elected officials

by Fitz, and Q&A from the audience.

This is our addressing issues that are meaningful to you in a serious manner, and doing so in an environment in which we won’t be allowed to take ourselves too seriously.”

It’ll be happening at the Loft Cinema, so Kozachik is trying to get advance word out there so he knows whether he should do it in the big auditorium or move it over the Loft’s spectacular new theater, which seats just less than 100 people.

He’s asking people to RSVP via the Loft at 795-0844, or the Ward 6 office at 791-4601 or ward6@tucsonaz.gov.

By Jim Nintzel Find early and late-breaking Skinny at The Range, our daily dispatch, at daily. tucsonweekly.com.

Jim Nintzel hosts the Political Roundtable every Friday on Arizona Illustrated, airing at 6:30 p.m. on KUAT Channel 6.

Follow the Skinny scribe on Twitter: @nintzel.

DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

13

CURRENTS While school gardens have been blossoming around TUSD for years, garden-to-cafeteria programs are just beginning to sprout

Grow, Tend, Eat? t Ochoa Elementary School, small fingers poke smaller seeds into furrowed soil. Beets, broccoli, spinach: Every day, a few students from the pre-kindergarten classroom come out to care for their expanding plants. They water and weed, watching seedlings emerge from these raised garden beds. Soon enough, the whole class will return to harvest the produce they’ve tended.

But don’t go looking in the cafeteria for that produce—at least not yet.

Although the Tucson Unified School District has yet to support garden-to-cafeteria programs, the U.S. Department of Agriculture announced in November that the Tucson Community Food Bank was one of 68 recipients of a Farm-toSchool grant, funded as part of the Healthy, Hunger-Free Kids Act of 2010, to bring more local produce into cafeterias, including produce from school gardens.

The $98,000 award will be shared between the Community Food Bank and TUSD. In addition to supporting the 12 selected schools with workshops, training and basic kitchen and garden infrastructure, staff from the Food Bank and TUSD will work to rewrite the district’s food-purchasing guidelines to formally allow preference for local producers.

Many schools throughout TUSD have on-site gardens, but ambiguity in how federal, state and county food-safety regulations align has frustrated attempts to get garden produce served in the school’s cafeteria. Since 2011, when the Pima County Health Department reversed an interpretation of its food code that deemed garden produce an unapproved source of public food, “It’s not endorsed but not forbidden to serve food out of the garden,” said Nick Henry, the Community Food Bank’s Farm-to-School coordinator.

Whether it’s endorsed or forbidden, students are eating the stuff they grow anyway. “All of the food we grow goes straight into the mouths of our students,” said Moses Thompson, a school counselor at Manzo Elementary School. “Just not necessarily in the cafeteria.”

Every other Wednesday afternoon at Manzo, students sell bundles of produce harvested straight from the garden—items like broccoli, basil, kale and, for the first time, in November, roasted tilapia, sourced straight from the school’s aquaponics system.

Every one of Manzo’s 260 students cycles through the garden at some point, either in a weekly ecology class or one-on-one time with Thompson, who does most of his counseling in the garden and works on restorative ecology projects throughout the school.

“The curriculum in the garden elicits a higher

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depth of knowledge than direct instruction in the classroom,” he said. “I’ve seen marked gains in critical thinking and problem-solving in students as a result of being in the garden.”

Math and chemistry are especially emphasized. Some students record compost temperatures and track data on the school’s food waste, while others measure water quality and nitrate levels in the aquaponics system. But in terms of nutrition, Thompson said, “Getting the garden’s high-quality, organic produce to be available in the cafeteria would be more valuable than the other stuff we do.”

Students are more likely to eat healthy—yet traditionally unpopular—foods like fruits and vegetables if they understand where they come from.

“If kids grow it and kids tend it, they’re excited to try it,” Thompson said. He recently hosted a schoolwide tilapia cooking demonstration—and only four students refused to try the fish.

With 50,000 TUSD students in more than 100 schools eating up to 40,000 meals every day, school meals are “not something that we can just pluck out of a garden and serve. It’s a bigger system than that, and it needs to be for the health of the public, especially children,” said Shirley Sokol, the district’s interim food services director. “Our main concern is food safety.”

Safety concerns include soil and water contamination as well as improper handling of the produce once harvested.

Others are concerned about students’ health in a different way. “One in two of every children I teach is expected to develop diabetes before high school,” said Paula McPheeters, who teaches pre-kindergarten at Ochoa Elementary. “And over a third of our students are considered overweight.” She recognizes the difficulty of putting fresh, whole foods on the table when “a head of broccoli costs three times as much as a McDonald’s hamburger.”

A head of broccoli pulled from a school garden, on the other hand, is effectively free. “We have these greens, laden with folic acids and all the other nutrients that our children desperately need, and we want to give it to them,” she said.

Ninety-eight percent of Ochoa’s students qualify for free or reduced-cost breakfast or lunch.

Among the 12 schools selected for the Farm-toSchool grant, 85 percent of students qualify for free or reduced-price lunches. “These are obviously very high-need schools,” Henry said.

But there are still kinks to iron out with district and state regulations. Nineteen TUSD schools received refrigerated salad bar carts with funds from the Communities Putting Prevention to Work grant awarded to Pima County in 2010. At Ochoa, the salad bar cart remains in the kitchen,

PAULA MCPHEETERS

BY MEGAN KIMBLE, mailbag@tucsonweekly.com

Ochoa Elementary

The 12 Schools Included on the Farm-to-School Grant Manzo Elementary School (on the school-closure list) Drachman Primary Magnet School Davis Bilingual Magnet School Ochoa Elementary School Roskruge Bilingual Magnet Middle School Wakefield Middle School (on the school-closure list) C.E. Rose Elementary School Nan Lyons Elementary School (on the school-closure list) Safford Engineering/Technology Magnet Middle School Tully Elementary Accelerated Magnet School Mission View Elementary School San Xavier Mission School

holding the pre-packaged produce that arrives from TUSD’s Food Services central location. As it stands now, the TUSD salad-bar format does not support children selecting greens or vegetables for themselves.

“We’re using (the salad carts) in a different way now, but that’s not to say that won’t change,” said Lindsay Aguilar, a dietitian and nutritionist for TUSD. “The goal for the next school year is to be … getting food from school gardens into the cafeteria,” she said. “And to have local products on our menus.”

TUSD and the Food Bank are beginning to review the capacity and distribution systems of local and regional producers to supply food for students enrolled in district schools.

For many, the point of the Farm-to-School grant is that, despite regulations, “It’s happening anyway,” Henry said. “Kids are eating garden food—and that’s great! This process is just going to make it safer, and make it official.”

One final time, here’s our annual naughty list of people, places and things for whom we’d like to buy a one-way ticket

BY THE USUAL GANG OF IDIOTS, mailbag@tucsonweekly.com

t

of

n!

Then, in the two weeks leading up to Dec. 25, we present those lists to you, our stunningly smart and good-looking readers, all of whom are most certainly on the nice list.

(Except for those of you who keep calling or emailing us about “chemtrails.”

Please stop. Really.)

Anyway, here’s Part One of our twoweek list bonanza. Tune in next week for the nice list, aka Local Heroes.

Ou

Every year since 2003, those of us at Weekly World Central have celebrated a tradition: We put on our Santa hats, get hopped up on some serious eggnog, and do our best Saint Nick impressions by making two lists: a naughty list, and a nice list.

G e t

w o T

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE

DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

15

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 15

Alberto Moore Despite all the moaning from so many quarters that downtown Tucson is dead, it’s actually as lively as it has been since the department stores left for El Con Mall. We’ve got student housing getting built, new restaurants opening up, a light-rail line going in, and more people shopping, dining, drinking and dancing than we’ve seen in decades.

Despite the ongoing revitalization, some members of the Rio Nuevo board continue to do their part to slow down the momentum—and the worst of those is Alberto Moore, whose pandering to Tea Party activists is ensuring that the board does little to nothing to actually help revitalization efforts.

Get out of town, Alberto Moore!

—Jim Nintzel Arizona Daily Independent There’s nothing like a strong conservative voice in a community—and ArizonaDailyIndependent.com is not a strong conservative voice.

We love the idea of a scrappy Internet news source with a willingness to dig into policy options and bark like a watchdog, but Loretta Hunnicutt’s ArizonaDailyIndependent.com is more like a yippy little inbred Yorkie that pees all over the carpet. The stories are incomprehensible screeds with a paranoiac edge, or sloppily rewritten press releases, while the cartoons combine lousy art with polemic speeches in the place of punch lines. You know that whoever writes most of this garbage must be ashamed of it on some level, because they won’t even sign their names to the stories.

Get out of town, Arizona Daily Independent. You suck at journalism.

—J.N. Arizona Stadium Sideline Reporter Piper Stoeckel This kid has a lot going for her: She’s the reigning Miss Arizona, and in a few weeks will be representing our progressive, clean-cut state at the Miss America pageant in Las Vegas. She’s an accomplished dancer, and she’s on the dean’s list at the University of Arizona.

What the 22-year-old native of Prescott is not, though, is the kind of commercialbreak entertainment that fans at Arizona Stadium are longing for. Maybe it’s the material she’s working with—we really don’t care what the on-field temperature is, and can we please get someone entered in the football-throwing contest who can actually throw? Regardless, Piper just didn’t hold the crowd’s attention this year.

Piper wants to be a broadcast journalist, and she certainly has the looks and personality for it, but this just wasn’t the right gig. So it’s time to get out of town, Piper Stoeckel—preferably on a nationwide tour wearing a tiara as the next Miss America.

—Brian J. Pedersen Blighted Houses The real-estate bust may not have turned Tucson into a ghost town, but it did create a fair number of haunted houses—or at least homes that appear to be haunted. These dilapidated dwellings have been long neglected and vacant, either as the victims of foreclosure or after being simply left to rot by families who could no longer afford to keep up payments.

While these shabby-looking homes blend in without issue in some neighborhoods, they stick out like broken teeth in others. A major example is a haggard home on the corner of a main thoroughfare in the Riverhaven subdivision, an area near Fort Lowell Road and Columbus Boulevard governed by a particularly anal homeowners’ association.

While the HOA has been known to send out letters for the slightest infractions and encourage residents to “tell on each other,” this house has been sitting and rotting, becoming more of an eyesore by the day. At least someone finally moved (or stole) the shutter that had fallen off a second-story window several months back. However, no one has dared to touch the yellow-brown thicket of garbage-catching weeds.

A sign on a front window proclaims, “No entry without authorization,” as though someone might really want to venture inside this dump. It’s time for the owners of blighted properties to either fix them up, or sell them and get outta town.

—Ryn Gargulinski Catholic Diocese of Tucson After years of crowing about how delighted it would be to deed the historic Marist College to the city, the Roman Catholic diocese pulled a last-minute flip-flop that left more than a few folks shaking their heads.

16 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

“Originally, the idea was for the city to take over the building, and use funds they claimed they had for (restoration),” John Shaheen, the diocese property and insurance director, told the Weekly in August. “They asked if we’d be willing to give them the property and the building, and we said, ‘If it’s good for the community, and it’s good to save the building, then let us know what we need to do.’”

It didn’t help that—based on this promise—preservation activists and city officials labored mightily to have the circa 1915, three-story adobe placed on the National Register of Historic Places, and the City Council allocated $1.1 million of its precious federal Community Development Block Grant funds toward stabilizing the building. The Downtown Tucson Partnership even helped craft a plan to make the Marist property, next to the Tucson Convention Center, eligible for federal restoration tax credits.

But just when all those stars were finally aligned, the diocese reneged, leaving the city and its partners looking like fools. As a result, the future of this landmark now seems more precarious than ever—though we hear that diocese officials have resumed chats over ways to save the Marist. If so, we applaud them—with trepidation. What’s that old saying about “twice burned?”

In the meantime, the diocese should hit the holy high road.

—Tim Vanderpool The District City honchos who championed a new student-housing behemoth in downtown’s West University Neighborhood should just hit the road. But first, they should be sentenced to a few months of living next door to The District.

Not only does this 756-bed, private dorm near Sixth Street and Fourth Avenue ignore neighborhood aesthetics, but it also draws an immature, barely post-pubescent population straight from Girls Gone Wild.

This all arrives in West University thanks to a city-initiated infill-incentive district, which encourages downtown-area development by reducing or waiving permit fees, and scrapping height and density restrictions. Everything will be fine, city leaders told neighborhood residents, who were labeled NIMBYS for fretting over The District.

The first insult came when two old homes—including an 1880s adobe—were bulldozed to make room for the project. The second unfolded when college students returned to Tucson in August. Within days, the complex had erupted into party central, garnering a dozen police reports, a flurry of prank 911 calls, and red-tagging of the pool after students threatened to toss a cop in for a dip. To this day, neighbors report a steady diet of loud parties and speeding cars.

While The District isn’t going away, nearby residents might glean some satisfaction by posting Tucson’s “visionary” city leaders in pup tents on their lawns for a few nights—before sending them packing.

—T.V. Efforts to “Define” What an Intersection Is We’ll save everyone a lot of time on this one: It’s the place where two perpendicular streets meet. Plain and simple.

If you need more information, it’s time to find some hobbies. But because of the influx of red-light cameras around town, a fruitless effort is being made by local law enforcement to actually “define” what constitutes the intersection of two roads, particularly those with Big Brother-like cameras. The Tucson Police Department even produced an informative little video—catchy title: “Red Means Stop!”—to help its cause. It matter-of-factly points out what everyone should have already learned when they took driver’s ed, or what they’ve likely been re-educated on during the traffic school classes you take when busted for a red-light violation: An intersection consists of the square formed by the curbs on each corner. If you’re not in there by the time the light turns red, Mr. Camera will snap your picture. Sadly, this video has only been viewed a little more than 1,000 times as of early December, so the message isn’t really getting out there.

While we applaud the effort, it’s time to scrap this mission and focus on more-important goals, like preparing for the inevitable confusion that will come with the so-called “Michigan U-turns” planned for Grant Road. Can’t wait to see the video on that one.

—B.J.P. Inept Salespeople With the job market still in a bind, you’d think those who do get hired would have at least a shard of competence. Well, think again.

Competence is not necessarily a requirement for retail, as evidenced by a steady stream of inept salespeople. The M.O. of the incompetent ones typically consists of

Jesse Kelly This is somewhat of a fait accompli, given that Jesse Kelly has already left town for a Washington, D.C., career raising ! money for Citizens United—and has no intention of coming ERROR back.

That pretty much confirms what we believed about him from the start: He was flat-out fibbing to voters when he said he cared about making his home in Southern Arizona, and he was flat-out lying to everyone when he said he was just a humble fella who had no desire to be a politician.

Jesse wanted a piece of power in Washington with all his heart and soul, and would have said or done just about anything to get there. Not for nothing did we call this cartoonish congressional hopeful a bullshit artist, mostly because he did nothing but regurgitate hard-right conservative talking points that had no connection whatsoever with actually solving problems.

We’re glad you got out of town, Jesse. Now do us a favor—and stay out.

—J.N.

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invading your personal space, insisting they can help, and then painfully wasting your time and energy.

Let’s say you pose a question on a particular type of product, like a boot shoelace. Since the inept have no clue about any of the shoelace features, they hurriedly read the back of every shoelace package, which is the same thing you’ve been doing for the past half-hour.

Let’s say you can’t even find the boot shoelace in the first place. Here’s where the inept will either drag you down every aisle of the store looking for this shoelace, or fire up a walkie-talkie to find someone, anyone, who has some idea where this mysterious boot shoelace may be.

Eventually, you end up with an entire legion of inept salespeople on a quest for the shoelace. Some scamper down every aisle while others are reading labels on related products to see if they can work in place of the shoelace. The most creative try to sell you a whole new boot, because, they point out, it comes with a shoelace included.

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Lazy People Who Press the Door-Opener for Handicapped People Which of these two groups of people is more reprehensible: Those who aren’t handicapped and don’t have a handicapped sign on their cars, but park in the handicapped spaces anyway; or those people who have a fake handicapped sign just so they can park there? I hate them both. I sincerely hope they become handicapped, at least for a while, because they’re so damned selfish.

A couple of years ago, I wrote about the jackasses who can’t walk that extra 15 or 20 feet to put their shopping carts away. They leave them in the parking space so the next person can’t park without dinging the car.

Those people, too, should be happy that they are able to make that walk, but they’re just lazy and selfish, and I hope they all develop a limp that defies medical science.

I’ve witnessed these aforementioned dregs of society for decades now, and about the only saving grace was that I couldn’t believe that people could get any more petty than that.

Until … I went to pick up someone at an office building here in Tucson.

I got there a bit early, so I sat in the car and got out a book. Then something caught my eye: One after another, professional people would approach the front door—many of them with their hands completely free, others maybe carrying a briefcase—and they would punch the handicapped button so that the doors would open. I couldn’t believe it.

Probably three out of every four people opened the door like a healthy, civilized person would do, but a ridiculously high number of people hit that button.

What is wrong with people?

—Tom Danehy

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TuCsONWEEKLY

17

Get Out of Town!

[The Readers Rant!]

A selection of our readers’ choices, in varying degrees of length and sanity Brad Nelson My suggestion for the 2012 GOOT un-award goes to Brad Nelson, head of the Pima County Elections Department. While working under Chuck Huckelberry, who works under/over the Board of Supervisors, Nelson has reigned over poorly run county elections for almost an eternity.

Going back to 1996, when precincts were split up (without voters knowing), to the 2012 elections, when precincts were combined into voting areas, Nelson has been a major part of botched elections time and again. This year, multiple jurisdictions, congressional districts and legislative districts were smashed together into fewer polling places. This forced some voters who actually went to the polls to check to make sure they had the correct ballot in hand (out of three or more possibilities) before voting. If making sure elections run smoothly isn’t Nelson’s job, whose job is it? Definitely time for Brad Nelson to get out of town!

—John Holden Frank Antenori A no-brainer (like him). Here’s a man who proudly expressed contempt for the needs of Tucson during his entire time in the Legislature, and who bragged about balancing the budget by the most draconian means possible. When a thoughtful Republican (my City Council member, Steve Kozachik) dared to criticize such destructive stupidity, Antenori proceeded, in a brilliant non-sequitur, to attack midtown Tucson residents as bums who live off the government. Then he had the incredible nerve to ask for our vote.

Frank, take your tarnished Bronze Star, your silly pseudo-machismo and your cheesy degree from some “Christian” university, and find some place where you can actually respect your neighbors. If that means Antarctica, so much the better—just stay away from the science stations.

—Shane Dyer Get Out of Town!

As a loyal fan of the Tucson Weekly, your wonderful staff and all of your efforts, I must say I read with real pleasure that you are going to get rid of the “Get Out of Town!” issue. It was, more often than not, too insulting, demeaning and unnecessarily (potentially) incendiary, and it was always something I never looked forward to.

Plus, it didn’t ever accomplish anything! In this age when we’re supposed to be thinking about the new “civility,” I applaud you for letting this “journalistic episode” go.

—Jefferson J. Stensrud CONTINUED ON PAGE 20

18 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 17

Leaf-Blower Users It’s like a drone strike. First, you hear the virulent whine, like a gigantic, robotic insect. As you draw closer—or it draws closer to you—the vector of doom becomes apparent. Through a cloud of fine debris, amid the stench of half-burned fuel, you get this visual: A dirty, dour man sweeps his arms back and forth like a modern-day Merlin, casting a spell of sanitary illusion with a mechanized magic wand: Man With Leaf Blower.

Here’s one vote for Man With Broom.

Leaf-blowers have to be the nadir of American techno-culture. The general concept is to use petroleum to do a job that could be done without it—granted, a fundamental American value. However, the actual effect in this case is to blast semiinert particles in the leaf-blower’s vicinity into a death cloud that floats into the neighbor’s yard, aggravates her kid’s asthma, raises her chances of lung cancer and causes her to … buy a leaf-blower. In the course of a year, the little beastie can spew enough carbon monoxide, nitrogen oxides and hydrocarbons into the air to equal the pollution of 80 cars. One hour of blowing approximates 100 miles of driving. Brilliant.

Don’t make us go all California on yer leaf-blowin’ ass and ban these things. Just take your obnoxious little dust drones and GTFOOT. —Randy Serraglio Michael Hicks If it weren’t for Tucson Unified School District school-board member Michael Hicks, the secret that most Mexican Americans have guarded for centuries would have remained concealed: Burritos have a power unlike any other culinary treat known to man.

But after Hicks was interviewed on The Daily Show, our secret was finally revealed—burritos create a bond so strong, they’ll make you fight for something you believe in.

That’s how it is in the world of Mexican-American studies, Hicks said when interviewed by Al Madrigal about the beleaguered MAS department, which was deemed illegal by the state.

Hicks also admitted during the interview that he formed his anti-MAS opinions without doing basic research. “I chose to not even go to any of their classes,” he said. “Why even go? I based my thoughts on hearsay from others.” He really said that.

The interview made MAS supporters want to laugh and cry at the same time. And those who never cared about the program before started paying attention. But the most damning phrase to come out of Hicks’ mouth was misidentifying civil-rights legend Rosa Parks as Rosa Clark. The national attention only added to our collective embarrassment.

Before the interview, Hicks was known for taunting MAS students at school-board meetings. But since the interview, when Hicks encounters MAS students during board-meeting breaks, they ask him something very important: “Who is Rosa Clark?”

It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

Hicks is up for re-election in 2014. But rather than run again, wouldn’t it be wonderful if Hicks got out of town before we finally made Aztlan a reality, before the final steps of the Reconquista? Yep, Mr. Hicks, that’s a burrito you’d feel on the way out.

—Mari Herreras

People Under the Illusion That Tucson Is a Liberal Paradise Remember those bumper stickers that said “Baja Arizona,” urging Tucson and the rest of Southern Arizona to secede?

Yeah, those were good times, but mainly because of the beer at those petition-gathering parties. While we kind of knew the idea of creating our own state was in jest, the ideals behind it, let’s admit, were also a joke.

The idea that Tucson is some type of liberal paradise is an illusion, or delusion, depending on whom you’re talking to.

What we have in Tucson are several liberal camps—one camp likes to get together for meetings and love fests with other like-minded folks, and another camp controls the political messaging and decides which candidates are viable. They aren’t mutually exclusive. After all, the second camp needs the first camp to believe everything is running as it should be.

But these past two years have been an eye-opener for many in the community. If grades were handed out, both camps would get an F. The excuses that Latinos don’t vote, that you’re not a viable candidate, or that the damn redistricting did it again? They don’t work anymore. Come up with something better.

Some have said that’s the way it’s going to be in Arizona, because conservatives rule state government. We can’t be perceived as too liberal so we can win over those folks who are not completely bat-shit right-wing.

Before anybody declares Tucson a liberal paradise again or asks you to come up with another name for our imaginary new state, just say no, and tell them to get the hell out of town. We want something real.

—M.H. People Who Don’t Use the SelfCheckout Lane for a Few Items Before there were self-checkout lanes at grocery stores, I would routinely offer my place in line to others behind me who had just a few items. It was the polite thing to do. Now, with the addition of self-checkout lanes, people buying a couple of things don’t have to wait in long lines behind full carts. So it puzzles me why people with one or two items still stand in the regular lines.

It’s irritating when they are impatient. Once, I had a cart full of food, and a man behind me had a six-pack of beer. He stood practically on top of me as I was emptying my cart. I could tell he was in a hurry by his sighs and body language. Since all of the self-checkout lanes were clear, I didn’t move any faster. Why do I need to speed up when there’s the option of self-pay—with no waiting?

It’s not rocket science: Push a button, scan and bag. If you can’t master that, then you need to ride a shopping cart out of town!

—Irene Messina People Who Throw Away Usable Goods Instead of Donating Them Living in a townhome community with shared trash bins, I get to see other people’s trash. Usually, y it is bagged gg and tied—but when it’s moving day, it’s another story.

CONTINUED ON PAGE 20

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GOOT! continued from Page 18

Jon Kyl A few weeks ago, Jon Kyl, retiring U.S. senator of Arizona, came by to drop off his papers he donated to the University of Arizona.

Why is he wasting the University of Arizona’s time and money? Jon Kyl’s voting record has always been anti-minority, anti-working person, anti-99 percent, anti-Arizona and antihuman civilization. His record is pro-1 percent, pro-authoritarianism, pro-obstructionist, proRepublican tribal hatred and pro-ignorance.

His remarks that Planned Parenthood spends almost all of its budget on abortions was awkwardly defended by his staff, even though the vast majority of Planned Parenthood’s budget goes toward providing educational instruction to all, and medical services to women. Kyl’s latest bill at “helping” minorities is a joke. It shows his denial that 332 of the electoral votes went to a re-elected president he wanted to force to become a one-term president. Finally, his holds on Obama-nominated federal judges show his disdain of the advise-and-consent role of the U.S. Senate and the judicial system of the United States. Kyl’s legislative record shows he has done nothing to lift the human spirit nor provided hope for the downtrodden.

No forest in the world can provide the amount of paper needed to defend the Jon Kyl political career. Kyl’s papers should be reprocessed into rolls of 250 double-soft sheets and put in the university’s restrooms. Their only worth is to wipe human private body parts.

So, Jon Kyl, take your papers, and GET OUT OF TOWN! —Matt Somers Junk in the Bike Lane Here I am, doing what a good denizen does—reducing my carbon output in one of T-town’s many miles of dedicated bike lanes. What’s this ahead? A shattered Bud Light bottle! Whoa, shards from a windshield! Swerve to avoid this chunk of … Cessna wreckage?! I’ve seen it all, avoided most, hit some—and been rewarded with flat tires and broken collarbones. Alas, it’s time to tell all this junk: Get out of town, or at least get out of the bike lane, where we don’t have steel-belted radials!

—Ari Shapiro Lingering Contrails!

There is much confusion over the (not until recently) lingering contrails given off by aircraft in our beautiful Tucson skies and alike throughout the world. Not too long ago, contrails would disappear within minutes, but you can now view these contrails carved in our sky for hours at a time, almost every day. Governments and scientists alike have briefly addressed experiments involving geo-engineering and different ways to “combat” global warming. One of them is to create artificial cloudlike contrails that sit in our atmosphere and prevent as much sunlight from reaching down to earth.

Now, there is much debate involving who says what, if this is taking place here and now, and if these experiments give off harmful chemicals. And while I do believe that there is scary evidence just a Google search away, the larger picture that must be painted involves our putting-makeup-on-a-pig social fabric of how we address problems: Are you feeling depressed about your life? Take some happiness pills. Is your country running out of legitimate money?

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A neighbor recently moved out and piled unwanted belongings into the bin. Visible items included a stroller, a broom and a jewelry box—all in usable condition. Sometimes, people leave stuff next to the bin, like a dresser or TV stand.

Someone once left a couch on top of the bin, so others were not able to put anything else in it.

There are many local charities, with drop-off donation areas, that can use these goods. Items can also be dropped into charity bins around town. And for furniture and big items, some charities will come to your house and pick them up. There’s no reason to throw away items when someone else in the community can use them. Besides that, donating and using recycled items means less stuff is put in landfills.

Our Earth could use the help. Donate your unwanted usable goods—or get out of town!

—I.M. People Who Whine That Tucson Needs a Randy Parraz Yes, Phoenix organizer Randy Parraz is cool. And nothing would please me more if the former U.S. Senate candidate who helped retire Russell Pearce came to his senses and moved to Tucson.

Maybe then, I’d finally stop hearing people in Tucson’s progressive-activist community whine about needing our own Parraz. I understand we’re in a difficult situation in the Moldy Pueblo. First, we don’t have tangible enemies, like in Maricopa County, where Parraz works his magic against folks like Pearce and Sheriff Joe. Our frothing-at-the-mouth Tea Party Republicans are more like harmless flies during the monsoon. The real challenge is the folks who like to remind themselves how liberal they are, when that’s not always the reality. You expect those folks to understand how racism works or why a bunch of kids are upset they lost their Mexican-American studies classes.

Sometimes it’s like talking to old Aunt Delores, who is 80 percent deaf—you care about her, but there aren’t enough hours in the day to keep repeating in a loud a voice what you did in school. Sometimes you have to get creative in how you explain what’s what.

So to all of you who whine about not having our own Randy Parraz: If you can’t bother to learn how to properly organize the good-hearted activists in this town, get out of town. I’ll hold the door for you.

—M.H. The Person Scheduling Endless Reruns of Coach on KVOA Channel 4 It seems somewhat unfair to pick on Coach, the largely nonoffensive laugh-tracked situation comedy which ran on ABC for nine seasons and 200 episodes. The cast, led by Craig T. Nelson, is fine, and the plots are acceptable, if reflective of what that sort of show was like in the pre-Office era of TV comedies. What sort of mess did Dauber get himself into this week? The owner of the Orlando Breakers, who looks a lot like Mona from Who’s the Boss?, makes bad decisions, like trading a draft pick for cruise tickets! The hilarity!

However, while I understand that it can’t be easy to fill 48 hours of programming, especially when NBC doesn’t have the sports lineup to compete with its network competitors, why does KVOA need to show four or more episodes of this particu-

lar show each weekend? Every channel has its throwaway time, so maybe Coach is a better option than Michael Lindell shilling his magical pillow, but it seems there must be another option from the hundreds of shows available in syndication. Who is showing reruns of American Gladiators these days, anyway?

C’mon, KVOA, Tucson deserves only the finest in entertainment largely designed to play in the background while taking a nap on the couch.

—Dan Gibson Rosemont PR Firms Back in 2005, a Canadian investment company bought 3,000 acres of land in the Rosemont Valley south of Tucson, with plans to dig an open-pit copper mine. Tailings from the mine would be dumped on the neighboring Coronado National Forest.

Today, that scheme remains mired in controversy as government officials mull the potential impacts. But whether or not Vancouver, British Columbia-based Augusta Resource Corp. ever digs its pit, local PR hacks such as Zimmerman Public Affairs and Strongpoint have already mined a small fortune painting lipstick on Augusta’s pig. Along the way, they’ve passed up few opportunities to mislead the public.

Working with in-house spinmeisters from Augusta’s opaque local subsidiary, Rosemont Copper, they’ve helped pack public meetings with fake mine supporters, orchestrated bogus surveys portraying community support, conjured up phony letters of approval from local neighborhoods, and trotted out an online list of “partnerships” with local nonprofits, most of which don’t consider themselves partners at all. For many of those groups, their only connection to Rosemont Copper came in the form of meager donations or the occasional volunteer from Rosemont.

Experts call such actions a black mark for the communications industry. “Good public relations is about building long-term relationships,” says Tiffany Gallicano, an assistant professor of public affairs at the University of Oregon. “What they’re doing involves deceit. How can people trust them with anything else if they’re already using underhanded tactics?”

Good question—and one for Rosemont and its lying lackeys to ponder as they catch the first ore train out of town.

—T.V. Slacker Street-Crossers Tucson traffic needs no help in becoming clogged and inefficient, but slacker street-crossers help ensure it stays that way.

First up is Slowpoke Sam. He’s the fully able-bodied, healthy dude who suddenly acts like he’s on his deathbed when it’s time to cross the street. He’ll shuffle, amble, drop things and move at the slowest pace possible to ensure that the intersection is unusable for vehicles for the entire length of the light.

Next comes Last-Minute Lucy. She’ll time her street-crossing just right, so that she starts a few seconds after the pedestrian sign starts flashing the ominous “Don’t Walk.” She’ll either take a cue from Slowpoke Sam and take her sweet old time, or she may come bolting out of nowhere into the crosswalk just as the traffic begins to move. ve.

Her move typically involves at least one person slamming on CONTINUED ON N PAGE 22

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GOOT! continued from Page 20

Well … print some more. Until we address the root of our problems instead of coating them with other problems, our societal issues will continue to layer and deepen. The concentrated point being: Get out of town, chemtrails. I kind of like our gorgeous desert sky!

—Griffin Cook Rosemont Mine/ Augusta Resource Corp.

Hey, Rosemont/Augusta. You still haven’t figured out that what we value most here are clean air, clean water, majestic mountains and the incomparable Sonoran Desert. We don’t need a noisy, dirty, polluting mine that will bring a few jobs (less than one-tenth of 1 percent of Pima County’s workforce) for a mere 20 years and then leave us with a huge, gaping hole near the ridgeline of the Santa Ritas, while burying oak-studded hills, several beautiful valleys, dozens of significant archaeological sites and 4,000 acres of wildlife habitat under 70-plus stories of tailings and waste mountains. Not to mention bringing light pollution to our night sky near Mount Hopkins observatory. Just go away. We’ve had enough of you. GET OUT OF OUR TOWN. —Gayle Hartmann Suzanne Miles and Ray Flores These bozos took a neat community college and turned it into a joke. We don’t need them in Tucson.

—Judy Hubbard Tea Party Republicans Let’s vanquish anyone who’s brave enough to say they’re a Tea Party Republican. As they all sit there, licking each other’s wounds and possibly downing a few shots to ease their pain, I’d like to remind everyone that after spending millions/ billions of dollars to defeat President Barack Hussein Obama, they lost! They weren’t satisfied with practically destroying America in their quest for vengeance due to Obama’s first win in 2008. I witnessed a party so bent on denying our president any type of “win” that they eventually “reaped what they sowed.” How ironic— they were willing to say NO to just about every Democratic proposal put forth attempting to better the nation, and then expected to receive the votes from the same electorate they were hurting with their obstructionism. The “talking heads” on Fox News this time around reminded me of the demon in The Exorcist with its head spinning 360 degrees. Here in Arizona, a gun shop is refusing to do business with anyone who voted for Obama! Talk about sore losers. And I can see that House Speaker John Boehner still hasn’t learned his lesson. This loss has left such a bad taste in their mouths.

My advice for them is to get out of town, since Tucson is a progressive city. Someday, we’ll be able to say that about Arizona in its entirety.

The sooner, the better for all Arizonans.

—Edwin De Jesus Sr.

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the brakes, and at least two people swearing or honking their horns.

The crème de la crème of the slacker street-crosser is Jaywalking Jerry. Although Tucson is peppered with plenty of crosswalks, Jaywalking Jerry can’t be bothered to use any of them. He prefers to cross in the middle of the street and usually waits for a fleet of traffic before doing so. Jaywalking Jerrys who cross in the light of day also like to take the time to glare at any drivers who don’t stop for them. And those who like to romp across traffic lanes at night often do so in dark clothing on poorly lit streets.

—R.G. Stereotypical SaddleBrooke People I would think that having a gas station, a grocery store, a golf course, a bank and a clubhouse within a development would prevent the stereotypical SaddleBrooke citizen from ever coming into town. (We’re not talking all SaddleBrooke residents.

But you know the kind we’re talking about.)

But every once in a while, they, unfortunately, feel the need

to leave their upscale caves and make face-time with locals. Or maybe they purposely come out to treat others like shit, and get some sort of twisted satisfaction from it.

I’m still trying to figure out what it is that makes them so bitter.

Isn’t the whole point of retirement being able to live a stress-free, happy life?

Apparently that’s not the case for a lot of the retirees living at SaddleBrooke. Almost every interaction I’ve had with them was simply disgusting. They don’t smile; they’re greedy; and they brag about their accumulated money as if having a six-digit balance in a checking account means others should bow down to them and kiss their ass. They tell terrible “annoy a liberal” jokes; they hate young people; and they’re borderline racist. I really wish they would just stay there, planning more parties for Martha McSally and the other GOP politicians they praise like saints.

It is because of people like this that Tucson and the rest of Arizona have the reputation that everybody here is a dick.

Please, SaddleBrooke, seal your gates, and rid us of your mean residents’ negative energy.

—Inés Taracena

… And Finally, the Get Out of Town! Issue After 10 years, we’ve decided that the aforementioned holiday tradition of getting together, getting bombed on eggnog and making our annual naughty and nice lists needs tweaking.

For one thing, all of that tequila-infused nog is not helping with our blood pressure.

And our legal team tells us we should not discuss the details of the incident involving the weed-whacker and the office copy machine that occurred when one member of the Weekly staff mocked another member’s Santa hat. (We can say that the Santa hat had frills on it, for Pete’s sake.

Who wears a freakin’ frilly Santa hat?)

Anyway, we’re going to keep Local Heroes around in the years to come. But in an effort to foster new, fresh ideas, we hereby formally announce the retirement of Get Out of Town!

Now if only John McCain would follow suit …

—Jimmy Boegle

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CITYWEEK

DECEMBER 13-19, 2012 OUR TOP PICKS OF WHAT TO DO AND WHERE TO DO IT

BY INÉS TARACENA AND MARIANA DALE

Sci-Fi Meets History

PICK OF THE WEEK

When people think of places or time frames, an iconic image automatically pops up in their heads: The Grand Canyon is to Arizona what a flapper is to the 1920s. Photographs, drawings and even maps help shape the identity of places and people, and showcase important historical events.

Tucson native Matthew Buchholz added a quirky twist to these iconic images. In his Alternate Histories series, Buchholz takes old photos, vintage prints, outdated maps and even Christmas cards, and adds characters that weren’t meant to be there: sci-fi zombies, robots and monsters. The result is the creation of a new history for each of the pieces.

Buchholz graduated from New York University with a degree in film and television. In 2009, he headed to Pittsburgh, where he developed an interest in the city’s history.

“I started looking at old maps and 19th- and 20thcentury prints of the city, and I was really captivated by the quality and beauty,” Buchholz said. “Some of these don’t see the light of day anymore, so I began to try to figure out a way to get people interested in them again.”

Buchholz took an illustration of Pittsburgh’s skyline circa 1870—and added a Godzilla-like monster walking across it.

It led to him creating an entire collection that revolved around Pittsburgh. Since then, An illustration by Matt Buchholz.

Buchholz has dug up historical pictures, such as John Trumbull’s painting of the signing of the Declaration of Independence, in which Buchholz placed a robot next to Thomas Jefferson and Benjamin Franklin.

Goofy sci-fi creatures have lived in Buchholz’s mind since he was a child. Growing up in the 1990s, he was infatuated by the TV-show Mystery Science Theater 3000, in which a man and his robots are forced to watch poorly made movies, often of the sci-fi variety. The cheap monster suits and the spray-painted cardboard meant to resemble robots eventually made their way from Buchholz’s childhood memories into the work he does today.

“I have always loved that type of handmade aesthetic of old sci-fi movies, even if the films themselves aren’t that good,” Buchholz said.

“There is something about spaceships hanging from wires. That aesthetic is very playful to me.”

Buchholz spends days, sometimes weeks, searching for old illustrations, photographs and maps. However, anything he adds to these pieces, whether it’s a nerdy robot or a snakelike monster, is secondary. He likes having the original piece remain the main focus, with the creatures adding an unexpected surprise. The challenge is to find pieces that are already digitalized, or online, or pieces that he’s able to buy and digitalize himself.

Buchholz makes the creatures look like they belonged in the map or photo in the first place.

24 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

“It takes a lot of practice to make the final pieces look seamless,” Buchholz said. “But the hard work pays off, because it looks like the zombies or robots were meant to be in maps and photos since the 1800s or whatever era they’re from.”

The final results are always playful. Although Buchholz has received requests to add gore, such as monsters ripping people’s heads off, he chooses to stay true to the 1950s sci-fi movie aesthetic he loved as a child. Creating death and destruction doesn’t appeal to him.

Buchholz is returning to Tucson, his hometown, for the first time since he began his artistic journey. For his one-day show, Buchholz has been working on maps and illustrations that represent our city and state. One piece consists of an illustration of Mission San Xavier del Bac—with a giant reptile behind it holding a stick. A map of Pima County from 1893 now highlights areas of zombie infestations.

Buchholz said he’s been looking forward to a show in Tucson since his first taste of national success. Because Pop-Cycle has sold some of his prints and cards, it seemed natural for the shop to host his first Old Pueblo show. He said the timing is also good, because he recently finished The Alternate History of the World, a soon-to-be-published book of prints featuring iconic images from around the globe.

“At the end of the day, Tucson is always going to be my home,” Buchholz said. “I am very excited to bring the work that I am passionate about and show it to my hometown and the people I grew up with. I love face-to-face shows, because it gives me the opportunity to see people’s reactions to my work, and I can’t wait to see Tucson’s reaction to it.”

Matthew Buchholz’s Alternate Histories will be on display from 11 a.m. to 7 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15, at Pop-Cycle, 422 N. Fourth Ave. The exhibition is free. For more information, call 622-3297.

Inés Taracena mailbag@tucsonweekly.com

LECTURES Girls Helping Girls Gender-rights activist Betty Makoni: lecture and film-screening Lecture: 4 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13 Film: 4 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14 Women’s Studies Building 925 N. Tyndall Ave., Room 100 612-7044

“I have been looking for justice all my life,” said Betty Makoni, a gender activist from Zimbabwe.

During her search, she has created an international organization to empower girls and has worked to raise awareness about gender violence, equality and HIV/AIDS. Makoni will lecture about her experiences on Thursday at the UA. A film featuring Makoni called Tapestries of Hope will be shown on Friday, followed by an open discussion. The documentary addresses the myth that a man can cure himself of HIV/AIDS by raping a virgin.

Makoni’s dedication is rooted in personal experience. She was raped when she was 6 years old, and domestic violence left her an orphan.

Despite the challenges, Makoni eventually attended the University of Zimbabwe, where she graduated with a degree in linguistics.

Along the way, she realized her story was not unique: Many girls she met shared similar backgrounds, particularly those who had dropped out of school.

“If I overcame all these problems, why can’t I just use my stories at something that motivates girls?” Makoni recalled thinking.

Her experiences led to the creation of the Girl Child Network Worldwide. With Makoni at the helm, the organization provides funds for education, mentoring and support for girls who have suffered sex abuse or are at risk for it. It’s now an international network of more than 900 clubs, according to the organization’s website. Makoni speaks at universities and shelters around the world.

“I didn’t want to be a little girl crying in my little village,” she said. “I wanted to take my story to the global level, to say, ‘This is wrong. Let’s correct it globally.’”

Both the lecture and the film screening are free. —M.D.

Far Left: “Big X” (cropped), by Gina Telcocci.

Left: A cropped painting created by Matt Cotten to illustrate the upcoming Gingerbread Man: A Puppet Show and Holiday Fiesta.

ART Lost and Found Art Running Amok 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday, from Saturday, Dec. 15, through Saturday, Jan. 26 (closed Dec. 23 through Jan. 1) Conrad Wilde Gallery 439 N. Sixth Ave., No. 195

THEATER/ KIDS & FAMILIES

SPECIAL EVENTS

Fairy Tale Twist

Mercado San Agustín’s Annual Holiday Bazaar

Gingerbread Man: A Puppet Show and Holiday Fiesta

11 a.m. to 6 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14, through Sunday, Dec. 16

4 p.m., Saturday and Sunday, Dec. 15 and 16

Mercado San Agustín 100 S. Avenida del Convento

622-8997; conradwildegallery.com

Puppets Amongus Playhouse 657 W. St. Mary’s Road

Another man’s trash can be an artist’s muse. Zippers, driftwood, wire and yarn are transformed into works of art in Conrad Wilde Gallery’s newest show, Running Amok.

“It’s pretty typical of what we do here,” said gallery associate Brittney Palomarez. “We’re just trying to get some new artists with different techniques.”

The show features five women: Katrina Lasko, Elizabeth Sheppell, Gina Telcocci, Sandra Vista and Daniella Woolf.

Vista’s “Aurelio of Camp Little” was inspired by a salvage-yard find of more than 20 pounds of zipper tabs. She painted and affixed more than 2,500 tabs to canvas panels. The resulting design is a hypnotic swirl of color.

Vista also paints, but has enjoyed working with mixed media and found objects since childhood.

“They have energy from somebody else,” Vista said of found objects. “They have a lot of weight to them, and a lot of personality.”

Oakland, Calif., artist Gina Telcocci uses found natural objects to create many of her pieces. Each of her three sculptures in the show incorporates a piece of driftwood that appears to float inside a wire sphere.

“I think of them as kind of looking like the object spun its own cage, like a cocoon,” Telcocci said.

She used methods similar to basketweaving to create each cocoon.

“It’s a lot of small pieces that by themselves are not that strong, but when woven together, they form a really kind of resilient structure,” Telcocci said.

Telcocci and Vista might “run amok” in order to find materials for their creations, but their work is an effort to make sense of chaos.

“I take a confusing mass of materials and organize it in a very orderly fashion,” Telcocci said.

The event is free. —M.D.

444-5538; puppetsamongus.com

Puppets Amongus debuted its new Playhouse earlier this fall—and now the halls are decked for the holidays.

The December show features the timeless tale of the cheeky Gingerbread Man, with a few surprises. Hint: A wily coyote replaces the cunning fox from the original story.

“Our version of it has a Southwest twist to it,” said Sarah Cotten, who runs Puppets Amongus with her husband, Matt.

Gingerbread Man is usually a oneman show for Matt Cotten. Sarah lends a hand with the props and is also a puppeteer at bigger productions.

Jimmy Carr, of Jimmy Carr and the Awkward Moments, will accompany the action on his accordion. Although the show follows a plot, there’s always a bit of improvisation.

“It’s the type of entertainment that is interactive,” Sarah said. “It’s not at all like sitting in front of the television and sort of quietly watching what’s going on.”

After the show, the Snatwell Family Four, a local folk band, will set the tone for ornament-making, singing and snacking on natural sweet treats.

It was the Cottens’ work as sculptors that led to a now-15-year-long career in puppetry.

“At a certain point, we became bored with the visual-art gallery scene and came to animate the sculptures we were making,” Sarah said.

For the Cottens, that turned out to be an excellent idea.

“People of all ages love it,” Sarah said, “sometimes in different ways.”

Admission is $8 for adults, and $6 for kids ages 3 to 12. —M.D.

Holiday Shopping, Tucson-Style

461-1110; mercadosanagustin.com

When Kira Dixon-Weinstein, executive director of Mercado San Agustín, moved to Tucson from New York, she thought a holiday bazaar would be a great addition to the mercado.

Dixon-Weinstein was a regular at the holiday bazaar that is held every year at New York’s Union Square Park. The outdoor market has more than 100 vendors and lasts about a month.

“When I moved here, I knew Tucson needed a holiday bazaar of its own,” Dixon-Weinstein said.

Five years ago, when Dixon-Weinstein began preparations for the Mercado Holiday Bazaar, she also took inspiration from bazaars in Austin, Texas, and various cities in Germany.

The first bazaar turned out to be a success, and has grown into a holiday tradition for many.

Dixon-Weinstein wanted the bazaar to also be a strong promoter of local businesses, and to celebrate Tucson’s culture. Through the years, the event has included some of the city’s best chefs, artisans, painters and merchants.

“It is important that we spend our money locally,” Dixon-Weinstein said.

“The bazaar has a variety of local products and vendors, so that people are able to do a lot of their Christmas shopping there instead of at a big corporation.”

The three-day bazaar includes live music and children’s activities, as well as the introduction of an El Nacimiento exhibit, which will feature a historical collection from the Menlo Park neighborhood, home to the mercado.

“The bazaar has something for everyone to enjoy,” Dixon-Weinstein said.

“We hope everyone will come out, support our local talent, and partake in this local holiday tradition.”

Admission is free.—I.T.

Spectators watch and learn about model rocketry from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15, at International Modelplex Association Complex, 3250 N. Reservation Road. $5 launch, free for spectators and children younger than 18. Visit sararocketry. org for more information.

Submissions CityWeek includes events selected by Inés Taracena and Mariana Dale, and is accurate as of press time. Tucson Weekly recommends calling event organizers to check for last-minute changes in location, time, price, etc. To have material considered, please send complete information

by Monday at noon 11 days prior to publication. Send to: Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726, or fax information to 792-2096, or e-mail us at listings@tucsonweekly.com.

DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

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TQ&A Rachel Garman When librarian Rachel Garman put the word out about her project Sexy Lady Bookworms, the response from people who wanted to be involved was overwhelming. The idea was to take sexy photos of women who love to read, and create packs of playing cards and calendars to sell, with the proceeds going to a local literacy organization. The only problem was, the word sexy seemed to turn off local literacy folks, even though all of the women are fully clothed. For more info on where to buy the SLB merch and help the Phoenix-based Kids Need to Read, visit sexyladybookworms.com.

Which library branch do you work at?

The Wilmot branch, in the children’s department.

Do they know about the project?

They do know. I was at a meeting with the library director to meet staff, and when I introduced myself, someone mentioned my project. It totally caught me by surprise. But it was all positive.

So how did the project idea start?

It started with my friend and I teasing each other. … He sent me a picture of a librarian stereotype. I told him, “But we don’t look like that stereotype,” and he said, “You know, what you should do is get librarians together and take pictures after hours and use the proceeds for charity.”

And that’s kind of what you did?

Although we didn’t use just librarians. I wanted to open it to every woman who likes to read. We put the call out on Facebook on a mad whim. I wasn’t sure it would work. I was overwhelmed. We had dozens and dozens of people volunteer their time.

Wonderful people who did hair and makeup, photographers who came through, and models. I was over26 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

whelmed by the kindness and generosity in Tucson. It was all amazing to me.

What was your vision?

We started with idea of a deck of playing cards and have each card be in homage to the 1950s pinups, but of women reading in bookstores. The first shoot came together, and more and more people started showing up. We realized we had more photos than we needed, and we decided to put together a calendar.

Why the pinup and card idea?

We wanted to get across that reading is sexy and cool and fun and attractive, and we thought that playing cards would be a nice way to do it, and a chance to use as many models as possible.

Where can I pick up the cards and calendars?

We’re selling them online on our website and local stores, like Antigone, Mostly Books, Toxic Ranch Records and other local places. The entire list is on our website, too.

How did you pick the charity?

I wanted the proceeds to go to a local literacy charity. A lot of them turned us down because they didn’t want to be associated with sexy. It got disheartening, because we’re not that sexy. The models are fully clothed. Then I found Kids Need to Read. They saw what we were doing, and ultimately they said “You know what? We think this is cool, and we think kids should see

BULLETIN BOARD

City Week Guidelines. Send information for City Week to Listings Editor, Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726, e-mail our account at listings@tucsonweekly.com or submit a listing online at tucsonweekly.com. The deadline is Monday at noon, 11 days before the Thursday publication date.

Please include a short description of your event; the date, time and address where it is taking place; information about fees; and a phone number where we can reach you for more information. Because of space limitations, we can’t use all items. Event information is accurate as of press time. The Weekly recommends calling event organizers to check for last-minute changes in location, time, price, etc.

EVENTS THIS WEEK

EVENTS THIS WEEK BOWL FOR AIR Golden Pin Lanes. 1010 W. Miracle Mile. 888-4272.

Two hours of cyber-bowling and one hour of traditional bowling benefit the American Lung Association from 1 to 4 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; $15, $10 younger than 16, includes shoe rental. Call 323-1812 for more info.

Mari Herreras, mherreras@tucsonweekly.com

Are you from Tucson?

I’ve been in Tucson for 12 years, but grew up in the South, in Arkansas. I transferred here to finish college, and it just felt like home.

SPECIAL EVENTS

that it’s not just grandmothers and nerds who read.” They are based in Phoenix, but are a national organization that gets books into underfunded libraries and schools.

It’s too bad a local group didn’t want to be involved.

I felt the same way. But still, it’s an Arizona-based charity that is focused on literacy for kids.

How many photo shoots did you do?

We put together several photo shoots at different locations, 12 photo shoots total. Initially we were working around everyone’s schedules. These are all volunteers. We spread it out over three months. We started in May, and I had the project done by September.

Is there another project in the works?

Sexy Gentleman Bookworms.

Good. I have some guys at my office I will recruit for you.

There’s interest. We had guys volunteering at the photo shoots for Sexy Lady Bookworms.

Maybe by then, local literacy groups won’t be too scared.

We heard back from Friends of the Pima County Public Library, but it was too late.

We had already announced the charity for this project.

But I think that’s who we will do this for next.

DOWNTOWN PARADE OF LIGHTS Floats, live music and brightly decorated vehicles parade through town to celebrate the season starting at 6:30 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free. For parking and route information and a schedule of other holiday events downtown, visit downtowntucson.org.

FESTIVAL DE NAVIDAD Fox Tucson Theatre. 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515.

Ballet Folklorico Arizona, Genaro Moreno, Mariachi Sonido de Mexico, Mariachi Cielo de Mexico, Salvador Duran and Olga Flores con Alma y Corazon perform at 7:30 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14; $15 to $22. Visit foxtucsontheatre.org for tickets and more information.

AN IRISH CHRISTMAS PARTY Veterans of Foreign Wars Post 549. 1884 S. Craycroft Road. 790-4626. A holiday dinner menu, Christmas and Irish music and Irish step-dancers are featured at an Irish American Gaelic Society of Tucson event from 5 to 10 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; $25. Reservations are required; call 730-1800 or 747-0059 for reservations and more information.

SOLSTICE PARTY AND MOCASHOP HOLIDAY SALE MOCA. 265 S. Church Ave. 624-5019. Mexican hot chocolate, tamales, live music and holiday cheer are on tap to celebrate the solstice and the debut of holiday gift selections including jewelry, vintage-design items, housewares, artist-multiples and more, from 7 to 8 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; $20, $10 member.

WINTERHAVEN FESTIVAL OF LIGHTS Winterhaven Neighborhood. Fort Lowell Road between Country Club Road and Tucson Boulevard. The Winterhaven Neighborhood’s massive holiday light display opens Saturday, Dec. 15, and continues through Saturday, Dec. 29. Hours are 5:30 to 10 p.m., daily; free. Donations of nonperishable food and money for the Tucson Community Food Bank are encouraged. Drivethrough nights are Tuesday, Dec. 18; and Friday and Saturday, Dec. 28 and 29. Visit winterhavenfestival.org for more information.

OUT OF TOWN HOLIDAY CHEER FOR THE FAMILY Avalon Organic Gardens. 2074 Pendleton Drive.

Tumacácori-Carmen. 603-9932. Live music, baked goods, hot cider, visits with Santa, music by the female teen band Israfel Awakened, a presentation of children’s songs and a screening of The God Child Came, an original Christmas musical by Global Change Theater Company, are featured at 7 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14; $12, $9 advance, $9 ages 6 through 11, free younger child.

Visit globalchangemedia.org/events for more information.

UPCOMING ROOFTOP SANTA SHOW Poets’ Square Neighborhood. Fifth Street and Columbus Boulevard. More than two dozen Poets’ Square neighbors continue a 24-year tradition of performing a 30-minute, rooftop musical skit that tells the Christmas story, at 6:30 and 8 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 23; free.

Members of the First Brethren Church provide pre-show entertainment. Treats and photos with Santa follow; free.

Please bring canned food for the Community Food Bank.

CHRISTMAS JEWELRY TRUNK SHOW Bridge Gallery. 5425 N. Kolb Road, No. 113. 5774537. Jewelry by Laurence Baca is on display and for sale from 3 to 7 p.m., Friday through Sunday, Dec. 14 through 16; free admission.

COUPLES’ GINGERBREADHOUSE DECORATING PARTY Westward Look Resort. 245 E. Ina Road. 297-1151.

A gingerbread-house-decorating party starts at 7 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13, in the Catalina Ballroom; $39 includes gingerbread house, decorations, light appetizers and a glass of wine.

CRAFT SALE AT THE SANTA CRUZ RIVER FARMERS’ MARKET Santa Cruz River Farmers’ Market. 100 S. Avenida del Convento. 882-3304. Craft-making and cooking demonstrations by members of the Iskashitaa Refugee Network highlight a market event that also features local honey, tortillas, jams and jellies, salsas, soaps and homemade pies, from 3 to 6 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13; free.

ELECTRIC HOLIDAY PARADE Tanque Verde Swap Meet. 4100 S. Palo Verde Road.

294-4252. A 110-foot long parade with Santa and his reindeer atop a light-covered choo-choo makes its way around the swap meet from 7:15 to 9:15 p.m., every Friday and Saturday, through Saturday, Dec. 22; free ride for children with two cans of food or a freewill donation for local charities.

HOLIDAY CRAFT FAIR The Gaslight Theatre. 7010 E. Broadway Blvd. 8869428. An arts and crafts fair takes place around the Gaslight Theatre, from 9 a.m. to 6 p.m., every Saturday and Sunday, through Sunday, Dec. 23; free admission.

HOLIDAY OPEN HOUSE AND PHOTOS WITH SANTA Arizona Feeds Country Store North. 4743 N. Highway Drive. 887-2202. Kids get their photo taken with Santa from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; $20 includes a 4 by 6-inch print and a CD of all photos taken. Refreshments are served, and kids do a craft while they wait. Pets are welcome. Visit afcountrystore. com for more information.

HOLIDAY OPEN HOUSES Music, refreshments, thanks to volunteers and donors, and information about the work of Interfaith Community Services are featured at two open houses, one at each ICS location: Thursday, Dec. 13, from 11 a.m to 1 p.m., at 8701 E. Old Spanish Trail; and Friday, Dec. 14, from 2 to 5 p.m., at 2820 W. Ina Road, including a performance by the Southern Arizona Women’s Chorus. Visit icstucson.org, or call 297-2738, ext 222.

MAYNARDS HOLIDAY MARKET Maynards Market and Kitchen. 400 N. Toole Ave. 5450577. A farmers’ market, a craft fair, beer-tasting from Borderlands Brewery, wine-tasting from Dos Cabezas, wreath-making demonstrations with a designer from Atelier de la Fleur, strolling carolers from Desert Voices, and photos with Santa by a steam-train engine, provide local-shopping opportunities in a festive atmosphere, from 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free.

MERCADO HOLIDAY BAZAAR Mercado San Agustín. 100 S. Avenida del Convento.

461-1110, ext. 8. Artisan foods, children’s clothing and toys, jewelry, specialty gifts and more are for sale from 11 a.m. to 6 p.m., Friday through Sunday, Dec. 14 through 16; free admission. Also featured are live music performances and kids’ activities including gingerbread cookie-decorating and photo ops with Santa Claus.

Traditional holiday foods such as tamales, buñuelos and champurrado are available for purchase. Visit mercadosanagustin.com for more information.

SAGUARO EASTSIDE DEMOCRATS New Spirit Lutheran Church. 8701 E. Old Spanish Trail.

296-2461. Saguaro Eastside Democrats meet at 6:30 p.m., the third Monday of every month; free.

SUPER SUNDAYS AT TANQUE VERDE SWAP MEET Tanque Verde Swap Meet. 4100 S. Palo Verde Road.

294-4252. Tanque Verde Swap Meet features an openair market with entertainment, carnival rides, face-painting, cash drawings, popcorn, balloon hats, international food trucks, keg-beer golf carts and fresh churro stands, and food giveaways every hour, from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., the third Sunday of every month. The first carnival ride is free; the rest are $1. Visit tanqueverdeswapmeet.com for more information.

THAI FOOD COMMUNITY BUFFET FUNDRAISER Wat Buddhametta: Tucson Buddhist Meditation Center.

1133 S. Swan Road. 745-4624. All-you-can-eat pad

Thai, egg rolls, chicken curry, vegetarian curry, desserts and more are served from 5 to 7 p.m., the third Saturday of every month; $10, free child younger than 10. Proceeds help support free classes at the center.

WANT TO BE IN OUR SPRING ARTS PREVIEW? We want to tell the world everything you’re doing in fine art, theater, music, literature, performance and the humanities, from Thursday, Jan. 24, through Wednesday, Aug. 14. Go to tucsonweekly.com to use our simple form, or email the basics--title, date, time, place, ticket prices, contact info and website--to listings@ tucsonweekly.com. Our deadline is Friday, Jan. 4. Put “Spring Arts� in the subject line. We don’t even need complete sentences!

OUT OF TOWN COMPUTER WORKSHOPS AT THE LIBRARY Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. Oro Valley. 229-5300. Classes are free, but reservations are required two weeks before the class. Get one-on-one help in understanding free digital downloads, and download eBooks, audiobooks and videos to your device, 11 to 1 p.m., Tuesday, Dec. 18; 2 to 5 p.m., Wednesday, through Dec. 26 and 11 a.m. to 2 p.m., Dec. 27. Bring your device and your library card or PIN. DEMOCRATIC CLUB OF THE SANTA RITA AREA Green Valley Democratic Headquarters. 260 W. Continental Road. Green Valley. 838-0590. Current events are discussed from 11 a.m. to 12:30 p.m., every Wednesday; free. Email acalkins10@aol.com, or visit gvdemocrats.org for more information.

HIGH-DESERT ART AND GIFTS MARKET Studio Tour Welcome Center and Gallery. 1880 W. American Ave. Oracle. 896-2464. A holiday show and sale of original, affordably priced works by Oracle artists and artisans continues through Sunday, Dec. 23. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Thursday through Sunday; free.

Call 896-2079 or 896-2234 for more information.

TOASTMASTERS OPEN HOUSE Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. Oro Valley. 229-5300. Learn about Toastmasters and how the organization helps develop confidence and poise for job interviews, presentations and seminars, from 9:30 to 11 a.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free.

VILLAGE OF CATALINA ART FESTIVAL 77 North Artworks and Marketplace. 16733 N. Oracle Road. Catalina. 825-4427. One-of-a-kind arts and crafts including paintings, sculpture, glass, photography, drawings, jewelry, fiber, wood, ceramics, mixed-media and furniture are available at prices of $10 and up, from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; and 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16; free admission. Food and beverages are available. Visit bowmanproductionsaz.com.

UPCOMING HOLIDAY SHOPPING AND CHAMPAGNE PARTY Tucson Museum of Art. 140 N. Main Ave. 624-2333. A free event features last-minute holiday shopping opportunities in a festive atmosphere in the museum lobby and store from 5 to 8 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 20; free.

PLANT-BASED POTLUCK SUPPER Our Saviour’s Lutheran Church. 1200 N. Campbell Ave. 327-6521. Bring a low-fat, plant-based dish to feed about four people and share the recipe, including an ingredients list, for the benefit of anyone with a food sensitivity, at 5:30 p.m., Friday, Dec. 21; $1 plus lowfat, plant-based dish. Please provide your own plate, cutlery, napkin and drink.

ANNOUNCEMENTS 24-HOUR CRISIS LINE: 624-0348, (800) 553-9387 Wingspan. 430 E. Seventh St. 624-1779. Report a violent or discriminatory action against you or someone you know by calling the 24-hour bilingual crisis line at 6240348 or (800) 553-9387. If it’s an emergency, please first call 911. All services are available in English and Spanish.

BEAGLE RESCUE Several beagle-adoption events and play dates are scheduled throughout the month. Visit soazbeaglerescue.com for the schedule and to learn more about Southern Arizona Beagle Rescue.

BEARS OF THE OLD PUEBLO Bears of the Old Pueblo provides social activities for gay and bi bearish men and their admirers. Check the website to verify dates, times, locations and programs, but newcomers are welcome at all regular activities, including a meeting and potluck from 2:30 to 4:30 p.m., the second Saturday of every month, at the Ward 6 Council Office, 3202 E. First St.; coffee from 7 to 9 p.m., every Wednesday, at Crave Coffee Bar, 4530 E. Broadway

Blvd.; happy hour from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m., every Friday, at Venture-N, 1239 N. Sixth Ave.; Bears Dinner Out, from 6:30 to 8:30 p.m., every third Thursday, at a location announced in the online calendar and on Facebook; and Bear Burgers from 5 to 7 p.m., on the last Sunday of every month; free admission. Many other activities are scheduled throughout the year and may also be open to guests. Visit botop.com, or follow “Bears of the Old Pueblo� on Facebook for a complete calendar of events.

Call 829-0117 to leave messages, or email bop@botop. com for more information.

BICAS BASIC MAINTENANCE WORKSHOPS BICAS. 44 W. Sixth St. 628-7950. A three-hour class teaches how your bicycle works and how you can prolong its life, from 4 to 7 p.m.,Dec. 19; $20. Topics include fixing a flat, diagnosing problems and regular maintenance techniques. Visit bicas.org for more info.

BICAS CRAFTER HOURS BICAS. 44 W. Sixth St. 628-7950. Workshops make useful objects and art projects from recycled materials, from 5 to 8 p.m., every Tuesday; freewill donation.

Materials are provided but donations of craft supplies are always welcome. Call 628-7950 for more info.

Your Local Outdoor Specialists

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BIKE MAINTENANCE FOR WOMEN AND TRANSGENDER FOLKS BICAS. 44 W. Sixth St. 628-7950. BICAS is open exclusively for women and transgender folks from 4 to 8 p.m., every Monday. Learn bike maintenance, or earn a bike with volunteer labor. Workshops are led by female and trans-identified mechanics. Visit bicas.org for more information.

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BINGO Water of Life MCC. 3269 N. Mountain Ave. 292-9151.

Join in a game of bingo at 6:30 p.m., every Friday; $6 to $20. Call 822-6286 for more information.

BRIDGE CLUB Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. Oro Valley. 229-5300. Adults play bridge from 1 to 4 p.m., every Wednesday; free. Call for more information.

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CALL FOR SUBMISSIONS Project for Civil Discourse, a division of the Arizona Humanities Council, solicits videos about improving civility, fostering collaborative problem-solving and improving civic engagement. Entries may be submitted in two categories: high school student, or college student and adult. Visit projectcivildiscourse.com for an entry form and more information.

CALL FOR VOLUNTEERS: TUCSON CLEAN AND BEAUTIFUL Community groups, businesses, religious groups, neighborhood associations and ad hoc groups of five or more volunteers are needed to adopt parks, streets, washes and other public areas on an ongoing basis. Call 7913109, or visit tucsoncleanandbeautiful.org.

CHESS CLUB Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. Oro Valley. 229-5300. All serious chess players are invited from 1 to 5 p.m., every Friday; free. Call for more info.

THE COFFEE PARTY Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. Oro Valley. 229-5300. Friendly discussions of current events take place from 1 to 3 p.m., every Tuesday; free.

Candidates from all political parties are invited to speak.

Call 878-0256 for more information.

COMMUNIST PARTY U.S.A CLUB MEETING Salt of the Earth Labor College. 1902 E. Irene Vista.

235-0694. A discussion of party activities takes place at 7 p.m., the first and third Monday of every month; free. Call 624-4789 for more information.

COMMUNITY DRUM CIRCLE Himmel Park. 1000 N. Tucson Blvd. 791-3276. A community drum circle takes place from 3:30 to 6 p.m., every Sunday; free. All are welcome. Call 743-4901, or e-mail cactuscarrie10@gmail.com for more information.

CONQUISTADORS TOASTMASTERS CLUB Jewish Community Center. 3800 E. River Road. 2993000. Anyone who wants to conquer fears of public speaking may practice in a supportive environment at 7 p.m., every Wednesday. Email davidmegaw@comcast.net for more information.

DESERT CRONES Fellowship Square Villa III. 210 N. Maguire Ave. 8865537. Women older than 50 meet from 1 to 3 p.m., every Thursday except holidays, to enjoy companionship and creativity. Programs include guest speakers, writing workshops and drumming circles. Call 409-3357, or email hobbitmagick@hotmail.com for more information.

DIVORCE RECOVERY DROP-IN SUPPORT GROUP Ward 6 City Council Office. 3202 E. First St. 7914601. An open support group for anyone ending a

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& 500-& t #03%&3-"/%4#3&8*/( $0.

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You’ll get biker bucks good for a free helmet, free front and rear bike lights and a free high quality bike lock. call 243-BIKE to learn more or to sign-up. visit www.BikePed.pima.gov biker bucks are coupons redeemable for specific products given to persons completing classes.

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TuCsONWEEKLY

27

BULLETIN BOARD

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relationship takes place from 1:30 to 2:30 p.m., every Tuesday; free.

DRINKING LIBERALLY The Shanty. 401 E. Ninth St. 623-2664. Liberal and progressive Democrats meet every Wednesday at 6 p.m.; free. The meeting often features special guests. Search for “Drinking Liberally Tucson� on Facebook for more information.

ELDER CIRCLES: THE WISDOM JOURNEY St. Francis in the Foothills Church. 4625 E. River Road.

299-9063. Elders hear presentations and share stories each month on one of four topics intended to encourage pro-active aging: life review; life repair; legacy and mentoring at 4 p.m., the first Saturday of every month at New Moon Haven, 16256 N. Oracle Road, Catalina; and 10 a.m., the second Friday of every month. Call 2986542, or email deljonesaz@cox.net for more info.

EXTREME COUPONING Cents-off coupons are collected from the Sunday newspaper and Tuesday home mailings to help support the food programs of the Southern Arizona AIDS Foundation. Coupons need not be cut out. They may be delivered from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday, at Southern Arizona AIDS Foundation, 375 S. Euclid Ave. FARMERS’ MARKETS Alan Ward Downtown Mercado: south lawn of the Main Library, 101 N. Stone Ave., 8 a.m. to 2 p.m., Wednesday, October through May; 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., Wednesday, June through September (339-4008).

Arivaca Farmers’ Market: 16800 Arivaca Road, Arivaca, 9 a.m. to noon, Saturday. Bear Canyon Open Air Market: northwest corner of Tanque Verde Road and the Catalina Highway, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (982-2645). Bisbee Farmers’ Market: Vista Park in the Warren section, 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday (520-227-5060). Community Food Bank: 3003 S. Country Club Road, 8 a.m. to noon, Tuesday (622-0525). Corona de Tucson Farmers’ Market: 15921 S. Houghton Road, Vail, 8 a.m. to noon, Friday (870-1106). Douglas Farmers’ Market: Raul Castro Park, between D and E avenues, downtown Douglas, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Sunday (520-805-5938 or 520-805-0086).

El Presidio Plaza Park Mercado: 115 N. Church Ave., 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., Friday (339-4008). El Pueblo Farmers’

Market: El Pueblo Neighborhood Center parking lot, SW corner of Irvington Road and Sixth Avenue, 8 to 11 a.m., Saturday (882-3304). Elgin Farmers’ Market: Kief-Joshua Vineyards, 370 Elgin Road, Elgin, 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., Sunday, May through October (520-455-5582). Farmers’ Markets at La Posada Green Valley: 665 S. Park Centre Ave., Green Valley, is 8:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m., Monday (603-8116). Farmers’ Market at Voyager RV Resort: 8701 S. Kolb Road, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Thursday (603-8116).

Friday Farmers’ Market at Broadway Village: 2926 E. Broadway Blvd., 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Friday (603-8116).

Green Valley Village Farmers’ Market: 101 S. La Caùada Drive, Green Valley, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Wednesday (4903315). Marana Farmers’ Market: 13395 N. Marana Main Street, Marana, 3 to 6 p.m., Tuesday (882-3313). Metal Arts Village Saturday Morning Market: 3230 N. Dodge Blvd., 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday (326-5657). Oracle Farmers’ Market: 2805 N. Triangle L Ranch Road, 9 a.m. to noon, Saturday (896-2123). Oro Valley Farmers’ Market: Town Hall at the corner of La Caùada Drive and Naranja Road, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (882-2157).

Plaza Palomino: 2970 N. Swan Road, winter: 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday; summer: 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (plazapalomino.com). Rincon Valley Farmers’ and Artisans’ Market: 12500 E. Old Spanish Trail, winter: 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday; summer: 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (591-2276). St. David Farmers’ Market: St. David High School, 70 E. Patton St., St. David, 9 a.m. to noon, Saturday, May through October (520-221-1074). St. Philip’s Plaza Saturday Farmers’ Market: St. Philip’s Plaza, southeast corner of River Road and Campbell Avenue, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (603-8116). Santa Cruz River Farmers’ Market: Mercado San Agustín, 100 S. Avenida del Convento, 4 to 7 p.m., Thursday (622-0525). San Manuel Farmers’ Market: 801 McNab Parkway, 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday (520-212-2337). Sierra Vista Farmers’ Market: corner of Carmichael Avenue and Willcox Drive, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Thursday; and corner of Charleston Road and Highway 90 bypass, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday (520-678-2638). Sunsites Farmers’ Market: Shadow Mountain Golf Course, 1105 Irene St., Sunsites, 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday (520-826-1250). Tucson Farmers’ Market: St. Philip’s Plaza, southeast corner of River Road and Campbell Avenue, winter: 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Sunday; summer: 8 a.m. to noon, Sunday (8822157). Tucson Farmers’ Market at Jesse Owens Park: Jesse Owens Park, 400 S. Sarnoff Drive, winter: 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Friday; summer: 8 a.m. to noon, Friday (9189811). Tucson’s Green Art and Farmers’ Market: 8995 E. Tanque Verde Road, 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (9822645). Ventana Plaza Farmers’ Market: 5455 N. Kolb Road, 3 to 7 p.m., Tuesday (603-8116).

FLUXX STUDIO AND GALLERY Fluxx Studio and Gallery. 414 E. Ninth St. 882-0242.

This nonprofit community space hosts exhibitions, performance art, movie screenings, workshops and special events to increase the visibility and promote the creation of queer arts and culture in Tucson. Volunteers are needed throughout the year to help with business, art and production projects. Visit fluxxproductionsstudioandgallery.tumblr.com for more information and details about upcoming events. Email joes@fluxxproductions. com for information about volunteering.

FOUNTAIN FLYERS TOASTMASTERS Coco’s Bakery Restaurant. 7250 N. Oracle Road. 7422840. Participants learn and enhance speaking and leadership skills in a friendly, supportive environment, from 6:30 to 7:45 a.m., Tuesday; free. Call 861-1160 for more information.

GAM-ANON MEETING University of Arizona Medical Center. 1501 N. Campbell Ave. 694-0111. A 12-step support group for families and friends of compulsive gamblers meets in dining room No. 2500D at 7 p.m., every Monday; free. Call 570-7879 for more information.

INDOOR SWAP MEET Tu-Swap Indoor Swap Meet. 1301 E. Apache Park Place. 222-7927. An indoor swap meet is open daily for vendors, and from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., Friday, Saturday and Sunday to the public; free.

ITALIAN CONVERSATION Beyond Bread. 3026 N. Campbell Ave. 322-9965.

All skill levels practice from 4:30 to 6:30 p.m., every Tuesday; free. Call 624-9145 for more information.

JIGSAW PUZZLE EXCHANGE Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. Exchange your jigsaw puzzle for a different one at the Jigsaw Puzzle Exchange display. Parking is free on Saturday, Sunday, evenings or for less than an hour.

Library hours are 9 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Wednesday; 9 a.m. to 6 p.m., Thursday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 5 p.m., Sunday; free. Call 791-4010, or email askalibrarian@pima.gov for more information.

MAHJONG Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. Oro Valley. 229-5300. Play Mahjong from 1 to 3:30 p.m., each Saturday; free. Call for more information.

MARXIST DISCUSSION GROUP Revolutionary Grounds. 606 N. Fourth Ave. 620-1770.

A discussion of selected readings takes place from 5:30 to 6:30 p.m., the first and third Sunday of every month; free. Call 235-0694 for more information.

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NOOK E-READER CLASSES Barnes and Noble. 5130 E. Broadway Blvd. 512-1166.

Classes are held from 7 to 8 p.m., the first Tuesday of every month; and from 7 to 8 p.m., the third Tuesday of every month; free.

PHILOSOPHICAL DISCUSSION GROUP Metropolitan Grill. 7892 N. Oracle Road. 531-1212.

Lively, friendly and civil discussions of philosophical questions old and new take place at 6 p.m., the first and third Monday of every month; free. Call 575-1743 for more information.

PIMA COUNCIL ON AGING INFORMATION AND ASSISTANCE A volunteer for the Pima Council on Aging provides information and answers questions about support available to seniors for caregiving, meals, housing, legal services and transportation; free: from 10 a.m. to noon, the second Tuesday of every month, at Sahuarita Branch

Library, 725 W. Via Rancho Sahuarita; from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., the second Tuesday of every month, at Oro Valley Library, 1305 W. Naranja Drive; from 10 a.m. to noon, the second and fourth Wednesday, at Ellie Towne Flowing Wells Community Center, 1660 W. Ruthrauff Road; from 10:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m., the second and last Wednesday, at Quincie Douglas Senior Center, 1575 E. 36th St.; and from 10 a.m. to noon, the third and fourth Wednesday, at Freedom Park Recreation Center, 5000 E. 29th St. For more information, visit pcoa.org.

RECYCLING CENTERS Neighborhood drop-off centers are located at Himmel Park, Joaquin Murrieta Park, Mansfield Park, Morris K. Udall Park, Miller-Golf Links Library, Golf Links Sports Park, Kennedy Park, Booth-Fickett Magnet School, Jacobs Park, Tucson Convention Center, Ward 5 Council Office, Patrick K. Hardesty Midtown Multi-Service Center, Himmel Park and the Los Reales Landfill. Visit tucsonrecycles.org, or call 791-5000 for more info.

THE ROADRUNNERS TOASTMASTERS Atria Bell Court Garden. 6653 E. Carondelet Drive. 8863600. The Roadrunners Toastmasters meet weekly from 6:30 to 8 a.m., Wednesday, to mutually support public speaking and leadership skills. Call 261-4560, or visit roadrunnerstoastmasters.com for more information.

SCRABBLE CLUB Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. Oro Valley. 229-5300. Play Scrabble from 1 to 5 p.m., each Monday; free. Call for more information.

SINGLES 50+ LUNCH GROUP Thunder Canyon Brewery. 7401 N. La Cholla Blvd. 7972652. A group meets for conversation and no-host lunch at noon, Sunday. Call 797-9873 for more information.

SOCRATES SATURDAY FORUM Ward 6 City Council Office. 3202 E. First St. 7914601. All are welcome to join a philosophical discussion at 9 a.m., the first and third Saturday of every month; free. Email lanamorgan1@yahoo.com for more info.

SUNDAY FEAST AND FESTIVAL Govinda’s Natural Foods Buffet and Boutique. 711 E. Blacklidge Drive. 792-0630. A ceremony consisting of music, chanting and dancing takes place at 6:30 p.m.; free. An eight-course vegetarian feast is served at 7 p.m.; $3. Call or visit govindasoftucson.com for more information.

TOASTMASTERS OF UNITY Risky Business Sunrise. 6866 E. Sunrise Drive. 5770021. Participants learn the art of public speaking, listening, thinking and leadership in a relaxed, informal and supportive atmosphere, from 4:30 to 5:30 p.m., every Saturday; free. Call 861-7039, or visit toastmastersofunity.com for more information.

TUCSON SINGLETARIANS A social club for singles age 50 and older meets for a variety of weekly activities, a hosted monthly social hour, and happy hour from 5 to 7 p.m., Wednesday and Thursday. Call 326-9174, or visit tucsonsingletarians. tripod.com for more information.

TUCSON SOCIAL SINGLES Singles meet from 5 to 7 p.m., every Friday, at a different location; free. Call 219-4332, or visit tucsonsocialsingles.org for locations and more info.

URBAN YARNS Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. Knitters and crocheters gather informally from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., each Friday, to work on their own projects, review the library’s fiber-themed books and find inspiration for new projects; free. No instruction is provided. Call 791-4010 for more information.

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XEROCRAFT: A PLACE TO CREATE Xerocraft. 1301 S. Sixth Ave. 906-0352. Tools and space for creative individuals to materialize their visions are available from 7 to 10 p.m., every Thursday; and from noon to 4 p.m., every Saturday; free. Visit xerocraft.org for more information.

YARNIVORES: A CROCHET AND KNITTING MEET-UP GROUP Murphy-Wilmot Branch Library. 530 N. Wilmot Road.

594-5420. A brown-bag dinner and socializing devoted to the yarn arts take place from 6 to 7 p.m., every Thursday; free. Bring dinner and a project.

BUSINESS & FINANCE EVENTS THIS WEEK GRANTS DATABASES OPEN LAB Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. Volunteers, staff and board members of nonprofit and community organizations research private grantmakers with the help of a librarian from 2 to 4 p.m., the second Friday of every month; free. Seating is firstcome, first-served. Call 791-4010 for more information.

MINGLE BELLS MIXER Armitage Wine Lounge and Café. 2905 E. Skyline Drive, No. 168. 682-9740. Members of Tucson’s advertising, marketing and public relations associations gather for wine-tasting and appetizers from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m., Tuesday, Dec. 18; $30 to $45, includes two pours.

Make reservations at aaftucson.org.

NO PLACE LIKE HOME Keller Williams Realty. 1745 E. River Road. 615-8400.

A home-ownership workshop takes place from 6 to 7 p.m., the second Thursday of every month; free. Call 909-9375 for more information.

OUT OF TOWN SCORE BUSINESS COUNSELING Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. Oro Valley. 229-5300. Experienced executives give individualized advice about starting or building a business, from 9 a.m. to noon, every Monday and Saturday; free by appointment.

WOMEN’S CONNECTION LUNCHEON American Legion Post 66. 1560 W. Duval Mine Road.

Green Valley. Marilu Vince presents “Freedom from Being in Charge” at a luncheon and holiday sing-along, at 11:45 a.m., Wednesday, Dec. 19; $13. Call 3931478 for reservations and more information.

UPCOMING STATE OF THE CHAMBER LUNCHEON AND HOLIDAY EXPO Doubletree by Hilton Hotel. 445 S. Alvernon Way. 8814200. A luncheon celebrating Tucson’s nonprofit community, and the 2012 accomplishments of the Tucson Hispanic Chamber of Commerce, takes place from 11 a.m. to 1:30 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 20; $35, $25 with prepaid reservation. Reservations are requested by Wednesday, Dec. 19. Visit tucsonhispanicchamber.org for reservations and more information.

ANNOUNCEMENTS COMMUNITY-HEALTH MICROGRANT The Tucson Osteopathic Medical Foundation offers a $1,000 grant each month in 2012 to support a unique project in community health. Visit tomf.org for more information and to submit proposals.

DROP-IN JOB-HELP Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. A computer instructor is available to answer questions and offer help with resume-writing, online jobsearching, email accounts, Internet-searching and more from noon to 3 p.m., every Monday; and from 9 a.m. to noon, every Thursday, in the second-floor Catalina Room; free. Walk-ins are welcome. Call 791-4010, or email askalibrarian@pima.gov to register or for more information.

IRS SEEKS VOLUNTEERS Volunteers are needed to provide four to five hours a week of free tax-preparation services to low-to-moderateincome residents of Green Valley and the Tucson metropolitan area. No prior experience is needed. Spanishspeaking volunteers are also needed as interpreters.

Email taxvolunteer@irs.gov with your contact information to learn more.

TUCSON PRESIDIO ROTARY CLUB Hotel Tucson City Center. 475 N. Granada Ave. 6232000. Lunch is open to the public at noon every Wednesday; $15. Call 623-2281 for reservations and more information.

YWORKS EMPLOYMENT TRAINING AND DEVELOPMENT PROGRAM FOR WOMEN YWCA Frances McClelland Leadership Center. 525 N. Bonita Ave. 884-7810. Employment-training and development workshops for women who are unemployed, underemployed or transitioning in the workforce take place from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m., the second and third Tuesday of each month. Computer-skills help is available from noon to 5 p.m., the second and third Wednesday of each month. Each workshop is $25; scholarships and internships are available. Call 884-7810, ext. 107, or visit ywcatucson.org to register and for more info.

FILM EVENTS THIS WEEK LOFT CINEMA SPECIAL EVENTS Loft Cinema. 3233 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-7777. The “Very Merry Holiday Sing-Along Spectacular,” featuring clips from holiday TV shows, movies and music videos, takes place at 7 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; $8, $6 member and child younger than 12, half-price with donation of an unwrapped toy. Prizes are given for the most overthe-top Christmas garb. The ballet Giselle, performed in the historic Mariinsky Theatre in St. Petersburg, is presented in 3D at noon, Sunday, Dec. 16; $10, $6 member. Visit loftcinema.com for a complete list of forthcoming films and to reserve tickets.

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OUT ON THURSDAYS Fluxx Studio and Gallery. 414 E. Ninth St. 882-0242.

As part of the Southwest LGBT Film Fest, a film is screened at 7 p.m. following a meet-and-greet at 6:30 p.m., on the second Thursday of every other month; $8, $10 VIP. Light refreshments are served.

THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW Loft Cinema. 3233 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-7777. The Rocky Horror Picture Show screens at midnight on the third Saturday of every month with Heavy Petting as the shadow cast; $10, $8 member. The film deals with mature subject matter and is not recommended for the easily offended. No one under 17 is admitted; ID is required; no alcohol is served.

UPCOMING HER JOURNEY REMEMBERED Congregation Young Israel. 2443 E. Fourth St. 8817956. Filmmaker Pamela Asherah premiers a biography about the life of Polish prison-camp survivor and current Tucson resident Chana Fels, at 4 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 23; free. A discussion follows with Asherah and Fels’ son, Moses Sterngast, who narrated the film.

GARDENING EVENTS THIS WEEK ASK DR. BESSEY Himmel Branch Library. 1035 N. Treat Ave. 594-5305.

Paul Bessey, president of the Gardeners of America, answers questions about gardening, from 6:30 to 7:30 p.m., Monday, Dec. 17; free.

BUTTERFLY MAGIC Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 326-9686, ext. 10. Walk through a greenhouse full of beautiful and rare butterflies from 11 countries, through April 30, 2013. Hours are 9:30 a.m. to 3 p.m., daily; $13, $7.50 ages 4 through 12, $12 student, senior or military, includes admission to the gardens.

Bottles or Cans

GREAT BEAN-TASTING Native Seeds/SEARCH Retail Store. 3061 N. Campbell Ave. 622-5561. Visitors taste bean dishes prepared by Tucson chefs at 10 a.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free. Visit nativeseeds.org for more information.

THE GREAT XERISCAPE Tohono Chul Park. 7366 N. Paseo del Norte. 742-6455.

A presentation and tour exploring how to use native and arid-adapted plants in water-saving landscapes take place at 10 a.m., the third Saturday of every month; $8, $6 senior, $5 active military, $4 student with valid ID, $2 ages 5 through 12, free member or child younger than 5, includes admission to the park. Visit tohonochulpark.org for more information.

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NATIVE SEEDS/SEARCH SALON Native Seeds/SEARCH Retail Store. 3061 N. Campbell Ave. 622-5561. A gathering of gardeners and cooks takes place from 5 to 7 p.m., the third Monday of every month; free, including recipes and samples. Visit nativeseeds.org for more information.

ORGANIC GARDENERS COMPOSTING EXHIBIT Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 326-9686, ext. 10. Tucson Organic Gardeners members answer questions in the composting-demonstration area from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., the first and third Saturday of every month, through May 18, 2013; $13, $4 age 4 through 12, free younger child, $12 student, senior and military personnel. Call or visit tucsonbotanical.org.

PASSIVE WATER-HARVESTING WORKSHOP Participants learn how to make a stormwater problem into a plant irrigation solution, and earn sweat-equity toward getting a project done at their own home, from 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free. Email co-op@ watershedmg.org, or visit watershedmg.org for more information.

PLANT CLINIC WITH PAUL BESSEY AND ASSOCIATES Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. Paul Bessey, retired UA Plant Sciences Professor, answers questions about plant pests, disease and nutrient deficiencies from 10 a.m. to noon, every Wednesday, through June. 26; $13, $7.50 ages 4 through 12, $12 student, senior or military, includes admission to the gardens.

SEED LIBRARY VISITS THE FARMERS’ MARKET Santa Cruz River Farmers’ Market. 100 S. Avenida del Convento. 882-3304. The Pima County Library’s seed library is available at the Santa Cruz Farmers’ Market from 4 to 6 p.m., the second Thursday of every month; free. Call 791-4010 for more information.

TUCSON AFRICAN VIOLET SOCIETY The East Side Night Meeting of the Tucson African Violet Society gathers from 7 to 9 p.m., the first Wednesday of every month, at The Cascades, 201 N. Jessica Ave. The East Side Day Meeting takes place from 9:30 to 11:30 a.m., the second Wednesday of every month, at The Cascades. The Northwest Day Meeting takes place from 2:30 to 4:30 p.m., the second Thursday of every month, at The Inn at the Fountains at La Cholla, 2001 W. Rudasill Road.

TUCSON ORGANIC GARDENERS St. Mark’s Presbyterian Church. 3809 E. Third St. 3251001. Members and prospective members of Tucson Organic Gardeners meet at 7 p.m., the third Tuesday of every month. Free literature, refreshments and a minimarket are available. Call 670-9158, or visit tucsonorganicgardeners.org for more information.

ANNOUNCEMENTS CLASSES AT TUCSON BOTANICAL GARDENS Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. No preregistration is required for these monthly classes at the Botanical Gardens. Classes are from 9:30 a.m. to noon, unless otherwise indicated; $16, $8 member, includes admission. “Gardening for the Newcomer” is the first Thursday and first Saturday.

“Xeriscape Doesn’t Mean Zeroscape” is the second Saturday. “Successful Plants for Tucson Gardens” is the third Saturday.”Rainwater-Harvesting Workshop” is from 9:30 to 11 a.m., the fourth Saturday. The gardens frequently offer classes on a wide range of gardening and related topics, including photography, painting and fauna that frequent Tucson gardens; $10 to $35, or free with admission; $13, $7.50 age 4 through 12, free younger child, $12 student, senior and military personnel. Call or visit tucsonbotanical.org.

MASTER GARDENERS LIBRARY TALKS Master Gardeners present workshops on a range of topics for the home gardener at 1 p.m., on selected Wednesdays, at the Murphy-Wilmot Library, 530 N. Wilmot Road, 594-5420; and selected Fridays, at the Oro Valley Library, 1305 W. Naranja Drive, 229-5300; and at 10:30 a.m., selected Saturdays, at the Mission Library, 594-5325. Call the libraries for dates and topics.

PLANT LOW-COST TREES FOR ENERGY EFFICIENCY Customers of Tucson Electric Power Company qualify for native shade trees to plant within 15 feet of their homes on the west, south or east side. Trees are $8 including delivery. Call 791-3109, or visit tucsonaz.gov/tcb/tft for more information.

TOURS OF THE TUCSON BOTANICAL GARDENS Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. “Exploring Tucson Botanical Gardens”

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is offered at 10 a.m., every Friday. The “Birds and Gardening Tour” is given at 10 a.m., the first and fourth Wednesday of every month. A “Historical Tour of the Gardens” is given at 10 a.m., and the “Butterfly Walk” is offered at 11 a.m., the third Thursday of every month.

Tours are included with admission; $13, $4 age 4 through 12, free younger child, $12 student, senior and military personnel. Visit tucsonbotanical.org for more information.

p.m., Monday through Friday. All testing is confidential; results are available in about 15 minutes; and counseling is available. Call for an appointment.

and signs her new children’s book about javelinas and Christmas, from 12:30 to 2 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free.

MEDITATION FOR HEALTH ENHANCEMENT TMC Senior Services. 1400 N. Wilmot Road. 3241960. A class on meditation for health takes place from 11 a.m. to noon, the second Thursday of every month; free. Pre-registration is required. Call 324-4345 to register or for more information.

HEALTH

PCAP: AFFORDABLE MEDICAL SOLUTIONS FOR PIMA COUNTY RESIDENTS A representative from the Pima Community Access Program, a service that links uninsured Pima County residents with an affordable and comprehensive network of health-care providers, is available by appointment to enroll members of the community and give a free assessment. Call 309-2923, or email cynthia@mypcap. org for information or an appointment.

TUCSON CIRCUS ARTS HOLIDAY WORKSHOP AND RECITAL Rhythm Industry Performance Factory. 1013 S. Tyndall Ave. 481-8003. Flam Chen performers teach poispinning and stilt-dancing from 7:30 to 9:30 p.m., Thursday and Friday, Dec. 13 and 14; $25, $40 for both sessions. Students show off their skills at 7:30 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16; $5 to $10 donation requested.

Call (928) 814-9637 for more information.

EVENTS THIS WEEK GROCERY TOUR AND HEALTHY-RECIPE SWAP Quality Strength Fitness Studio. 3870 W. River Road, No. 108. 891-9488. Fitness professionals provide recipes and shopping tips, then guide a tour through a nearby supermarket to illustrate ways to eat well on a budget, at 11 a.m., every Wednesday. Call 891-9488 for more information.

REDISCOVERING THE JOY OF THE HOLIDAYS St. Philip’s in the Hills Episcopal Church. 4440 N. Campbell Ave. 299-6421. A program for anyone for whom sadness arrives with the holidays takes place from from 10 a.m. to noon, Saturday, Dec. 15, in the West Gallery; free. Participants bring photos of their lost loved ones or other reasons they dread the holiday season. ’TIS THE SEASON TO BE POISONED Arizona Health Sciences Center. 1501 N. Campbell Ave. 626-7301. An exhibit of holiday hazards and related safety tips arranged around a parody of “A Visit From St. Nicholas” continues through Thursday, Jan. 10, in the Health Sciences Library near the Java City coffee bar; free. Hours are 7 a.m. to 9 p.m., Sunday through Thursday; and 7 a.m. to 7 p.m., Friday and Saturday. Holiday hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday through Friday, Dec. 15 through 21; and Wednesday through Friday, Dec. 26 through 28. The library is closed Saturday through Tuesday, Dec. 22 through 25; and Dec. 29 through Jan. 1. Call 626-6165, or email barta@pharmacy.arizona.edu for more information.

TMC SENIOR SERVICES TMC Senior Services. 1400 N. Wilmot Road. 3241960. Classes and events are free, but advance registration is required; call 324-4345 to register. Thursday, Dec. 13, from 5:30 to 6:30 p.m.: “Healthy Feet: Step Out of Common Foot and Ankle Pain,” Dr. Eric Anctil.

Monday, Dec. 17, from 10:30 a.m. to noon: Stroke Support Group. Tuesday, Dec. 18, from 2 to 3:30 p.m.: APDA Parkinsons’s simultaneous support groups for people with Parkinson’s and their caregivers.

ANNOUNCEMENTS CURVES LAUGHTER YOGHA CLUB Curves. 2816 N. Campbell Ave. 326-1251. Men, women and children laugh for well-being from 5:30 to 6:30 p.m., every Sunday; freewill donation. Call Gita at 777-7544, or visit laughteryogawithgita.com for more information.

FAMILY CAREGIVER SUPPORT GROUP St. Philip’s in the Hills Episcopal Church. 4440 N. Campbell Ave. 299-6421. Any family caregiver who needs a safe place to share highs and lows, learn about resources, ask questions and develop coping skills is invited to drop in for this facilitated group from 10 to 11:30 a.m., the first and third Wednesday of every month; free. Participants may attend as often or as seldom as they like. Call 790-0504 or 891-3299 for more information.

FREE HEALTH SCREENINGS Radiant Research. 7840 E. Broadway Blvd., No. 140.

885-6793. Free screenings for cholesterol, blood sugar, gout and BMI are offered from 7:30 to 11:30 a.m., every Wednesday. Call to schedule a screening.

GAY/LESBIAN AA MEETINGS Water of Life MCC. 3269 N. Mountain Ave. 292-9151.

Groups for both men and women are Pink Triangle, which meets at noon, every day; Odds and Ends Group, which meets at 7 p.m., Tuesday and Thursday; and Wednesday Night Candlelight, which meets at 7:30 p.m., Wednesday. A women-only Pink Triangle group meets at 7 p.m., every Friday. Visit aatucson.org for more information.

HIV TESTING The Centers for Disease Control recommend HIV testing for all people ages 13 through 64. Visit napwa.org for more information on AIDS testing and its benefits.

Testing hours at SAAF, 375 S. Euclid Ave., are from 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., every Monday and Wednesday; and 1 to 8 p.m., Tuesday and Thursday. Walk-in testing is also available at COPE, 101 S. Stone Ave., from 9 a.m. to 4

KIDS & FAMILIES EVENTS THIS WEEK ALLEGRO SCHOOL OF MUSIC Students from Allegro perform a series of concerts from 11 a.m. to 6 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 6, in Holsclaw Hall at the UA School of Music, 1017 N. Olive Road; free with food donations for the Community Food Bank. Donations of non-perishable food items also are accepted at the school, 4641 N. First, Ave., No. 5, from noon to 8 p.m., Monday through Friday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; and 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., Sunday, through Friday, Dec. 21.

HOLIDAY EXPRESS Families enjoy holiday singing, a morning reading of the Polar Express, model trains, giveaways, photos with Santa in front of steam Locomotive No. 1673, and letters to the North Pole with help from Tucson Postal History Museum elves from 11:30 to 1:30 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15, at the Southern Arizona Transportation Museum in the Historic Depot, 414. N. Toole Ave.; free. Visit tucsonhistoricdepot.org for more information. The Polar Express, the film, is screened at 2 and 8 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15, at the Fox Tucson Theatre, 17 W. Congress St.; $5 and $7. Visit foxtucsontheatre.org for reservations and more info.

HOLIDAY PET FOOD DRIVE Speedway Veterinary Hospital. 3736 E. Speedway Blvd.

321-4235. Pet food is collected for the Humane Society of Southern Arizona, from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m., Monday through Friday, through Monday, Dec. 31.

TUCSON JUNIOR CHAMBER STRINGS Tucson High Magnet School. 400 N. Second Ave. 2255000. The top three levels of the orchestra perform works

by Mendelssohn, Rimsky-Korsakov, Haydn and others at 7:30 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; freewill donation.

TUCSON RIVER OF WORDS YOUTH POETRY AND ART TRAVELING EXHIBIT Wheeler Taft Abbett Sr. Branch Library. 7800 N. Schisler Drive. 594-5200. An exhibit of children’s poetry and art expressing their understanding of watersheds continues through Thursday, Jan. 31; free. Hours are 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 5 p.m., Sunday. Call 615-7855, or e-mail eeducation@ pima.gov for more information.

TUCSON YOUTH POETRY SLAM Bentley’s House of Coffee and Tea. 1730 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-0338. A spoken-word competition judged by the audience takes place the third Saturday of every month, beginning with a poetry slam workshop at 5 p.m., and continuing with the slam at 7 p.m.; freewill donation. First-timers are especially welcome. Only original work may be spoken, but it may be in any style or language. Each event also includes a reading by a nationally known poet.

TWILIGHT NATURE WALK Feliz Paseos Park. 1600 W. Camino de Oeste. 8776000. A naturalist guides a leisurely stroll to see how seasonal changes affect local plants and animals, from 4:30 to 5:30 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14; free. Reservations are required; call 615-7855, or email eeducation@ pima.gov for reservations and more information.

WIECK CHAMBER SINGERS AND ORCHESTRA Green Fields Country Day School. 6000 N. Camino de la Tierra. 297-2288. A performance of Gian Carlo Menotti’s Amahl and the Night Visitors features the Green Fields Mixed Chorus at 7 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13, in the Green Fields Center for the Performing Arts; $15. Email elasansky@greenfields.org, or call for tickets and more information.

NATURE DISCOVERY PACKS Agua Caliente Regional Park. 12325 E. Roger Road.

877-6000. Explore nature and learn about the diversity of wildlife at the park through self-guided activities and tools included in the park’s nature packs, from 8 to 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free. The packs are available to families and youth groups. Reservations are not required. Call 615-7855, or email eeducation@ pima.gov for more information.

WINTERHAVEN RUN THROUGH THE LIGHTS St. Francis Cabrini Church. 3201 E. Presidio Road.

326-7670. A noncompetitive 5k fun-run over the flat paved streets of the Winterhaven neighborhood takes place at 5:45 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16; free. Festive, holiday attire is encouraged. Gather afterward for a free slice of pizza. Call 326-9383, or visit azroadrunners.org for more information.

PARKS IN FOCUS Saguaro National Park East. 3693 S. Old Spanish Trail.

733-5153. A reception and exhibit of photographs taken by Boys and Girls Clubs kids participating in the Parks in Focus program, takes place from 1 to 4 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free.

ZOOLIGHTS Reid Park Zoo. 1030 S. Randolph Way. 881-4753.

Light displays, animal-themed light sculptures and thousands of sparkling bulbs are featured from 6 to 10 p.m., daily, through Sunday, Dec. 23; $6, $4 child, $1 member discount. Call or visit tucsonzoo.org for more information.

PUPPETS AMONGUS Puppets Amongus Playhouse. 657 W. St. Mary’s Road.

444-5538. Gingerbread Man, a puppet show and holiday fiesta, takes place at 4 p.m., Saturday and Sunday, Dec. 15 and 16; $8, $6 kids ages 3 through 12, free younger kids. The puppet show follows the adventures of Gingerbread Man in the Sonoran Desert. After the show, families enjoy natural sweet treats, a holiday sing-along, craftmaking and music by folk band the Snatwell Family Four. Visit puppetsamongus.com for more information.

ROCKET LAUNCH Tucson International Modelplex Association Complex.

3250 N. Reservation Road. Spectators watch and learn about model rocketry from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; $5 launch, free for spectators and children younger than 18. Rental rockets with motors are available for $2 per launch. The club has a waiver for rockets to fly up to 4,500 feet. Visit sararocketry.org.

STORIES THAT SOAR Blenman Elementary School. 1695 N. Country Club Road. Students’ original stories come to life in a theatrical production by the Stories That Soar ensemble at 9 a.m., Friday, Dec. 14. Call 360-6709 to arrange admission to the school campus.

SUSAN LOWELL: ‘A VERY HAIRY CHRISTMAS’ Mostly Books. 6208 E. Speedway Blvd. 571-0110.

Susan Lowell, author of The Three Javelinas, reads

OUT OF TOWN FAMILY FUN FOR THE HOLIDAYS El Rancho Robles. 1170 N. Rancho Robles Road.

Oracle. 896-7651. Ornament-decorating, candy-cane hunts, hayrides and more take place in a turn-of-thecentury setting from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., every Saturday and Sunday, through Sunday, Dec. 30; free. Family photos or photos with Santa are $10 each. Email elranchorobles@gmail.com, or visit elranchorobles.com for more information.

TEEN ADVISORY BOARD Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. Oro Valley. 229-5300. TAB, the teen advisory board, shares ideas and plans teen events for the library, from 2 to 3:30 p.m., the third Saturday of every month, except holidays; free.

TEEN MUSIC Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. Oro Valley. 229-5300. Teens invite friends to hang out and listen to favorite CDs in surround sound from 6:30 to 8 p.m., the third Tuesday every month; free.

UPCOMING DANCING IN THE STREETS Fox Tucson Theatre. 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515. Live music by the Civic Orchestra of Tucson is featured in this affordable, full-scale production of The Nutcracker Suite by a company known for its diversity, at 7 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 22; and 3 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 23; $13.

Call 867-8489, or visit ditsaz.org for tickets and more information.

FAMILY SOLSTICE CELEBRATION Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. Families celebrate the solstice and the changing of the seasons with storytime and a craft that uses sunlight, from 10 to 11 a.m., Saturday, Dec. 22; $13, $7.50 ages 4 through 12, free younger child, $12 student, senior or military, includes admission to the park. Visit tucsonbotanical.org for more information.

ANNOUNCEMENTS CRAFT-A-PALOOZA Bookmans. 3733 W. Ina Road. 579-0303. Kids enjoy crafts from 1 to 2 p.m., every first and third Saturday; adult crafts are featured from 1 to 2 p.m., every second and fourth Saturday; free. Supplies are provided. Visit bookmans.com for each week’s featured craft.

THE CREATIVE SPACE Tucson Museum of Art. 140 N. Main Ave. 624-2333.

Materials and activities are available in the lobby to encourage families to create museum-inspired artwork; free with admission. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Wednesday, Friday and Saturday; 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., Thursday; noon to 5 p.m., Sunday; and closed Monday and Tuesday; $8, $6 senior and veteran, $3 student with ID, free younger than 13, free the first Sunday of every month. Visit tucsonmuseumofart.org for more information.

DRAGONFLY BOOK CLUB Himmel Branch Library. 1035 N. Treat Ave. 594-5305.

Kids ages 8 to 12 discuss books, enjoy snacks and make a craft at 3 p.m., the third Wednesday of every month; free.

FREE GUITAR LESSONS 17th Street Music. 810 E. 17th St. 624-8821, ext.

7147. Free beginner guitar lessons are offered every Friday from 3:30 to 4:15 p.m. for ages 6 to 12, and from 4:30 to 5:15 p.m. for age 13 and older. Visit seventeenthstreetmarket.com for more information.

RAILROAD DAYS Southern Arizona Transportation Museum. 414 N. Toole Ave. 623-2223. Docents guide visitors through the history and mechanics of the refurbished steam locomotive No. 1673, featured in the movie Oklahoma, from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., every Saturday; free. A Gadsden scale railroad is featured inside the museum. Visit tucsonhistoricdepot.org for more information.

RAPTOR FREE FLIGHT Arizona-Sonora Desert Museum. 2021 N. Kinney Road.

883-2702. Harris’ hawks, great horned owls, ferruginous hawks, gray hawks, prairie falcons, red-tailed hawks, Chihuahuan ravens and peregrine falcons fly completely untethered, often close to visitors, at 10 a.m. and 2 p.m., daily, through Sunday, April 14, 2013; $14.50, $5 ages 4 through 12, free younger child. Visit desertmuseum.org for more information.

READ TO A DOG Murphy-Wilmot Branch Library. 530 N. Wilmot Road.

594-5420. Kids ages 2 to 12 improve their reading skills by reading to a therapy dog from 2:30 to 3:30 p.m., every Wednesday; free.

SMARTY PANTS Tucson Museum of Art. 140 N. Main Ave. 624-2333.

Children ages 3 and 4 and their adult companions collaborate in hands-on art-making inspired by the current exhibition in the museum, at 10 a.m., the third Saturday of every month; $10 child, $8 member, includes admission to the museum. Nov. 17: Playful Lines, based on the Matisse exhibition.

STORIES IN THE GARDEN Tohono Chul Park. 7366 N. Paseo del Norte. 7426455. Kids and their parents listen to traditional and original stories about the desert and its creatures in the Garden for Children at 10 a.m., every Tuesday. A one-hour walking tour of the nature trails takes place at 9 a.m. and 1 p.m., Monday through Saturday; $8, $6 senior, $5 active military, $4 student with valid ID, $2 ages 5 through 12, free member or child younger than 5, includes admission to the park. Visit tohonochulpark. org for more information.

WEEKEND MATH TUTORING Math tutoring for TUSD students in grades 3 through 12 takes place from 10 a.m. to noon, most Saturdays, through May 11, at Roberts-Naylor K-8 School, 1701

S. Columbus Blvd.; free. Visit tusd1.org/math to register and for more information.

OUTDOORS EVENTS THIS WEEK GNEISS (GEOLOGY) WALK Sabino Canyon Visitors’ Center. 5700 N. Sabino Canyon Road. 749-8700. Volunteer naturalist Peggy Wenrick guides an adult walk over moderately difficult trails to look at geologic formations in the canyon, from 8:30 to 11:30 a.m., Thursday, Dec. 13; $5 parking or $20 annual pass. Wear good walking shoes and bring water.

ROCK ART AND ARCHAEOLOGY OF VENTANA CAVE PCC Community Campus. 401 N. Bonita Ave. 2064528. Archaeologist Allen Dart leads a carpool tour of a cave on the Tohono O’odham nation, from 6:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; $35, $28 member of Old Pueblo Archaeology, Pueblo or Grande Museum Auxiliary, free for members or employees of the Tohono O’odham Nation. The cave has petroglyphs, pictographs and other features of habitation from as long as 10,000 years ago. Reservations are required. Call 798-1201, or email infor@oldpueblo.org for reservations.

SUNDAY HIKES Catalina State Park. Oracle Road, 5 miles north of Ina Road. 628-5798. A moderately paced hike of 7 to 9 miles over 400- to 1,400-foot elevations takes place at 7:30 a.m., every Sunday in December, weather permitting; $7 park entrance fee. Call 638-5404 for reservations by 4 p.m. Saturday.

SWEETWATER WETLANDS BIRD WALK Sweetwater Wetlands. 2667 W. Sweetwater Drive. 7914331. Volunteers from the Tucson Audubon Society lead a two- to three-hour walk on an easy, level path to see most of the regular winter birds of the Tucson area, at 8 a.m., Wednesday, Dec. 19; free. All ages and birding abilities are welcome. Call 615-2285, or email eeducation@pima.gov for more information. Bring water and wear a hat.

VENTANA CANYON TO MAIDEN POOLS Ventana Canyon Trail. 7000 N. Resort Drive. Sabino Canyon naturalists lead a medium-difficulty hike of 5 miles with an elevation gain of 1,000 feet over 3 to 4 hours, at 8:30 a.m., Friday, Dec. 14. Call 429-4492 for more information. Children younger than 18 must be accompanied by an adult.

CAREER EDUCATION

OUT OF TOWN PATAGONIA LAKE STATE PARK Patagonia Lake State Park. 400 Patagonia Lake Road.

Patagonia. (520) 287-6965. Visitor center hours are 8 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., Wednesday through Sunday. Avian tours take place on the pontoon boats at 9 a.m. and 10:15 a.m., daily. Pontoon boats depart for the Lake Discovery Tour to the west end of the lake at 11:30 a.m., daily. A twilight pontoon tour takes place just before dark on Saturdays. Each boat trip is $5. Bird walks are held every Monday and Friday at 9 a.m.; walks are about three hours long; free. Park entrance fees are $10 vehicle, $17 non-electric camping sites, $25 electric sites. Visit azstateparks.com for more information.

SANTA CRUZ RIVER WALKS Tumacácori National Historical Park. 1891 E. Frontage Road. Tumacácori. 398-2341. Guided walks of a halfmile along a level, unpaved trail through rare habitat for birds and wildlife take place at 10:30 a.m., every Wednesday, through April 24; free.

UPCOMING CHRISTMAS EVE URBAN BIRDING Meet at the intersection of Tanque Verde Road and the Catalina Highway at 7:30 a.m., Monday, Dec. 24, for a Tucson Audubon Society birding trip to Tanque Verde Wash, Agua Caliente Park and Woodland Road; free. Call 647-3273, or email azcliffy@q.com to register.

PHONELINE TO HISTORIC TRAIL TO SABINO CREEK Sabino Canyon Visitors’ Center. 5700 N. Sabino Canyon Road. 749-8700. Sabino Canyon Naturalists lead an easy hike of 7 miles with a 600-foot elevation gain over 3.5 to 4 hours, at 8:30 a.m., Friday, Dec. 21; free.

Younger than 18 must be accompanied by an adult.

ANNOUNCEMENTS ART IN THE PARK Tohono Chul Park. 7366 N. Paseo del Norte. 742-6455.

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TuCsONWEEKLY

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examines the changing art and cultural exhibits that feature work by local and Southwest artists. The tour takes place at 11 a.m., every Tuesday and Thursday. A one-hour walking tour of the nature trails takes place at 9 a.m. and 1 p.m., Monday through Saturday. The walks are free with admission: $8, $6 senior, $5 active military, $4 student with valid ID, $2 age 5 through 12, free member or child younger than 5, includes admission to the park. Visit tohonochulpark.org.

BEGINNER BIRD WALK Mason Audubon Center. 8751 N. Thornydale Road.

744-0004. The Tucson Audubon Society hosts an introduction to birdwatching for all ages with a casual, guided stroll through the saguaro-ironwood desert at 8 a.m., every Saturday; free. Call 629-0510, ext. 7011.

BIRD WALKS Catalina State Park. Oracle Road, 5 miles north of Ina Road. 628-5798. A 2.5-hour guided walk along mostly flat terrain begins at the picnic-area parking-lot ramada at 8:30 a.m., every Friday and Sunday, weather permitting; $7 park entrance fee. Birders of any age or skill level are welcome. Dogs are not allowed.

MASON CENTER MORNING BIRD WALKS Tucson Audubon Society Mason Center. 8751 N. Thornydale Road. 572-9881. Learn the basics of birdwatching and how to identify the backyard birds commonly seen in the Tucson area, at 8 a.m., every Saturday, through May 25, 2013. A brief presentation is followed by an easy walk on a half-mile trail. Advance registration is required; email volunteer@ tucsonaudubon.org for reservations.

MOUNT LEMMON SKYCENTER SKYNIGHTS PROGRAM Mount Lemmon SkyCenter. 9800 Ski Run Road. 6268122. A peek through the largest public viewing telescope in the Southwest is just part of a five-hour tour of the universe, from 5 to 10 p.m., nightly; $48 Monday through Thursday, $60 Friday through Sunday, $30 student. Reservations are required. Visit skycenter.arizona. edu for reservations. Search Facebook for “Mt. Lemmon SkyCenter� for daily photo updates about current events in the universe.

SONORAN DESERT WEEDWACKERS Tucson Mountain Park. 2020 N. Kinney Road. 8776000. Volunteers age 12 and older help remove buffelgrass and fountain grass from 8 to 11 a.m., every second and fourth Wednesday; and every third Saturday; free. Work may require hiking and working on steep slopes. Meeting locations are in Tucson Mountain Park.

Details are given with RSVP, which is required. Call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov to RSVP or for more information.

TOHONO CHUL GUIDED BIRD AND NATURE WALKS Tohono Chul Park. 7366 N. Paseo del Norte. 7426455. Birders at any level of expertise tour the nature trails and gardens of 49-acre Tohono Chul Park and learn to identify some of the 27 resident bird species at 8:30 a.m., every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. A one-hour walking tour of the nature trails takes place at 9 a.m. and 1 p.m., Monday through Saturday; $8, $6 senior, $5 active military, $4 student with valid ID, $2 ages 5 through 12, free member or child younger than 5, includes admission to the park. Visit tohonochulpark. org for more information.

SPIRITUALITY EVENTS THIS WEEK MITZVAH 613 TORAH FAIR Congregation Anshei Israel. 5550 E. Fifth St. 7455550. The congregation celebrates its commissioning of a new Torah with a fair from 9 to 11 a.m., Sunday, Dec. 16. Attendees are encouraged to leave “Mazel Tov� messages commemorating the congregation’s 83rd anniversary. Breakfast, Torah cookies, a sing-along, learning stations and the staff’s help in finding particular Torah verse are featured at the fair. Call 745-5550, ext. 225.

SAGITTARIUS HOLIDAY/POTLUCK PARTY Arboretum Apartments Clubhouse. 4700 N. Kolb Road.

519-6800. Astrologer, medium and channel Tom Jacobs discusses his experiences working with an ascended master to prepare for the end of the Mayan Calendar, at a meeting of the Tucson Astrologers Guild, at 6:30 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14; free. Participants are asked to bring something for potluck.

RAMSEY CANYON PRESERVE WALKS Ramsey Canyon Preserve. 27 Ramsey Canyon Road.

Miracle Valley. (520) 378-2785. Nature Conservancy docents give guided walks through the habitats of more than 170 bird species and a wide range of wildlife at 9 a.m., every Monday, Thursday and Saturday; $5, $3 member or Cochise County resident, free younger than 16, admission is good for a week. Pets are not allowed.

TUCSON IANDS EXPERIENCE SHARING (TIES) Unity of Tucson. 3617 N. Camino Blanco. 577-3300.

Jeff Olsen discusses the near-death experience he had in an accident that killed his wife and son, at 6:30 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13; $5. Call 395-2365.

SABINO CANYON WALKS Sabino Canyon. 5700 N. Sabino Canyon Road. 7498700. Volunteer naturalists guide adults on a leisurely paced walk to identify plants and birds, from 8:30 to 11:30 a.m., every Tuesday, through Tuesday, April 23.

Volunteer naturalist Bruce Kilpatrick helps visitors pan for garnets by Sabino Creek, from 10:30 a.m. to 3:15 p.m., every Wednesday, through Wednesday, April 30.

Activities are free with $5 daily or $20 annual admission to the park. Call or visit scvntucson.org.

WALKING MEDITATION IN THE GARDEN Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 326-9686, ext. 10. A guided walk facilitates mindful meditation to allow centering for the new year, quieting minds and opening to stillness and silence, from 8:30 to 9:15 a.m., Friday, Dec. 21; $13, $4 age 4 through 12, free younger child, $12 student, senior and military personnel, includes admission to the park. Visit tucsonbotanical.org for more information.

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BHAGAVAD GITA STUDY Govinda’s Natural Foods Buffet and Boutique. 711 E. Blacklidge Drive. 792-0630. Shared reading and indepth study of the ancient Indian text takes place from 6:30 to 8 p.m., every Wednesday; free. A free light meal follows. Visit govindasoftucson.com for more info.

EVOLVE TUCSON St. Francis in the Foothills Church. 4625 E. River Road.

299-9063. A discussion about how to create a healthy, sustainable, peaceful and prosperous community in Tucson takes place from 1:30 to 3:30 p.m., every Sunday; freewill donation.

LGBTQ BUDDHIST MEDITATION AND PRACTICE Three Jewels. 314 E. Sixth St. 303-6648. Two 20-minute silent-sitting meditations, readings from Buddhist spiritual texts and discussion take place from 10 to 11:45 a.m., every Sunday; free-will donation. Bring a pillow or cushion. Call 884-4691 or 306-4691.

WAKE UP TUCSON Hi Corbett Field. 3400 E. Camino Campestre. 3279467. Ajahn Sarayut of Wat Buddhametta leads a walk around Randolph Park to promote physical and mental-health awareness, from 6:30 to 8:30 a.m., every Tuesday and Saturday; free. Visit tucsonbuddhistcenter. org for more information.

WISE WOMEN DRUMMING Unitarian Universalist Church. 4831 E. 22nd St. 7481551. Mature women meet to drum and sing from 1 to 3 p.m., the first and third Saturday every month; free.

Drums are available. Call 797-9323 for information.

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UA MEN’S BASKETBALL UA McKale Memorial Center. 1721 E. Enke Drive.

Saturday, Dec. 15, at 8 p.m.: Florida. Tuesday, Dec. 18, at 7 p.m.: Oral Roberts. Tickets are $20 to $115. Visit arizonawildcats.com/sports for tickets.

UA WOMEN’S BASKETBALL UA McKale Memorial Center. 1721 E. Enke Drive. The UA meets Weber State at 3 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16; and Longwood at 7 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 20; $3 to $8. Visit arizonawildcats.com for tickets and more information.

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PERFORMING ARTS ATC’s ‘Emma’ is light entertainment that will satisfy some, and underwhelm others

Not Quite a Match lthough we are delighted when a theatrical endeavor delivers something greater than the sum of its parts, most of the time, we witness a collaboration that produces ‌ well, simply the sum of its parts.

So it is with Arizona Theatre Company’s Jane Austen’s Emma, a well-crafted, goodnatured musical-comedy adaptation of Ms. Austen’s much-appreciated 19th-century novel.

Paul Gordon’s book, music and lyrics relate the condensed story of meddlesome matchmaking cleverly enough. ATC’s cast is wonderfully capable and committed to the story. The voices are rich, and the characters, though necessarily truncated in their development and depth, define themselves with an immediacy that tempers our abbreviated history together. The production is well-supported by a cleverly nifty set by Bill Forrester and handsome period costumes by Yoon Bae. The elements for a wonderfully charming evening at the theater are all there, knit together well enough to result in well-done if light entertainment. And that’s what we get.

Directors Stephen Wrentmore and David Ira Goldstein are careful to set us up for an evening of the fanciful and the frivolous.

Forrester’s set features a double proscenium, handsomely and classically represented. But instead of gods or mythical creatures on the entablature, there are farm animals and other objects suggestive of the rural society we will enter. They are cutouts, hinting at three dimensions, but actually consisting of only two. This cutout conceit is carried to an elaborate cartoonlike orchestra, complete with a conductor facing the stage, where cardboard-cutout figures representing our story’s various characters stand. And to reinforce this idea of edifice, on both sides of the stage are cutout figures in theater box seats.

A

(At least I think this was their purpose; there didn’t seem to be any other that I could discern.)

You can’t say we aren’t warned.

Austen’s novel, written in 1815, was a bit unusual in its focus on a single, childless young woman who is financially secure, and so is not desperate to find employment or to make a match herself. This is what makes the story both substantive and a bit sad, although that’s certainly not the intent of Gordon’s upbeat, amiable creation. Emma (Anneliese van der Pol), for all her confidence in her powers of meddling, is really a shallow, spoiled young woman, with no clear path in the society of her time. What’s a woman to do? She needs a purpose and direction for her youthful energy, but the opportunities for channeling her energy are few. So she seizes on the idea that she is a masterful matchmaker, an idea resulting from her having introduced her governess to a man with whom she does make a good marriage.

Youthful, pretty and privileged, Emma foolishly fancies herself with powers she clearly does not have. She decides that her friend Harriet Smith (Dani Marcus) should court the vicar (Brian Herndon), although Harriet has her eye on a strapping young farmer, Mr. Robert Martin (Jon Eidson). But Emma thinks Harriet could do better. Predictably, her idea backfires, and the vicar declares his love for Emma, who is flabbergasted.

And so it goes. Missteps and misconceptions characterize the world Emma creates, with cruelty sometimes thrown in as well. But don’t you know that the boy next door, a longtime family friend, Mr. Knightley (Shannon Stoeke), has the courage to call her out, and in doing so, finds that he cares for this womanly work in progress?

It can get a bit confusing, which Gordon acknowledges in his lyrics, but he manages to

TIM FULLER

BY SHERILYN FORRESTER, sforrester@tucsonweekly.com

Anneliese van der Pol in Arizona Theatre Company’s Jane Austen’s Emma. craft an understandable abridgement of Austen’s Jane Austen’s Emma Presented by Arizona Theatre Company story. And he treads a fine line, knowing that his leading lady may not be an example of woman7:30 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13, and Friday, Dec. 14; 8 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; 2 p.m., Sunday, hood at its finest, and that the society about Dec. 16; 2 and 7:30 p.m., Wednesday, Dec. 19; which he writes is not the most cleverly evolved.

2 and 7 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 20; 7:30 p.m., But his approach is not judgmental. He creates Friday, Dec. 21; 2 and 8 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 22 neither fairy tale nor cautionary tale.

Temple of Music and Art But where is its heart? Doesn’t it need one?

330 S. Scott Ave. That’s part of the problem when you set the Runs two hours and 30 stage with cardboard characters. And that’s minutes, with one intermission what makes this presentation, although charm- $40 to $79 ing and skillfully presented, a bit underwhelm622-2823; ing, whether it’s been made plain that this is arizonatheatre.org two-dimensional stuff or not.

With less-skilled actors, this could be a real as Frank Churchill gamely create what are not mess. But the efforts of ATC’s cast are stellar. the choicest specimens of their gender. Stoeke Van der Pol is wonderful, creating from lessas Mr. Knightley fares a bit better, and his disthan-attractive qualities a very likable Emma. covery of his love for Emma is delivered with Clad in pink, she’s clearly a princess, and her passion in one of the more beautiful songs of opening number, “I Design the World,� leaves the show, “Emma.� us with no doubt that we will be treated to a Emma has been around for five years and strong and lively, if flawed, heroine. has been produced in San Francisco, Central to the story—and perhaps the one Cincinnati, St. Louis and at San Diego’s Old who carries its wisp of a heart—is Marcus’ Globe. It doesn’t appear to be BroadwayHarriet. She submits to being a wonderfully bound, since it’s more a chamber musical than warm and willing pawn in Emma’s game while a sprawling, flashy show. struggling to find her true self and to act in her Maybe it just lacks that certain something own best interests. Marcus gives a lovely perthat can draw the crowds. To paraphrase a formance. character, it’s not really that one dislikes it; it’s What’s somewhat refreshing is that the men just that one is disinclined to make an attachare often the manipulated rather the manipulament to it. tors. Herndon as the vicar and Colin Hanlon

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DANCE EVENTS THIS WEEK ARIZONA DANCE THEATRE PCC Proscenium Theatre. Pima Community College West Campus, 2202 W. Anklam Road. 206-6986. The Nutcracker is staged at 2 p.m., Saturday and Sunday, Dec. 15 and 16; $23 and $25. Call 206-6986 or 8875658 for reservations. Visit creativedancearts.com for more information.

BALLET RINCON Vail Theatre of the Arts. 10701 E. Mary Ann Cleveland Way. 879-3925. Tchaikovsky’s The Nutcracker Ballet is staged at 7 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14; and 2 and 7 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; $8 to $14. Call 574-2804 for reservations and more information.

ECSTATIC DANCE TUCSON Rhythm Industry Performance Factory. 1013 S. Tyndall Ave. 481-8003. Participants express themselves with dance, and have fun in an alcohol-, drug- and judgmentfree environment, at 7:30 p.m., the third Saturday of every month; $7 suggested donation, free child. Call 229-6247 for more information.

FREE ZUMBA GOLD CLASS Danser Studio. 4340 N. Campbell Ave., No. 107. 3952073. Zumba Gold, a Zumba dance and fitness class with easy-to-follow steps designed for the active older adult, is offered from 9:30 to 10:30 a.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free.

MOSCOW BALLET’S GREAT RUSSIAN NUTCRACKER Fox Tucson Theatre. 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515.

The 20th anniversary production of this classic work is staged at 7:30 p.m., Monday and Tuesday, Dec. 17 and 18; $27.50 to $180. Call or visit foxtucsontheatre.org for more information.

A SOUTHWEST NUTCRACKER TCC Music Hall. 260 S. Church Ave. 791-4101.

The Tucson Regional Ballet performs A Southwest Nutcracker with accompaniment by the Tucson Symphony Orchestra, at 2 and 7:30 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; and 2 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16. $28 to $38 includes $4 processing fee. This original, full-length ballet translates the traditional Nucracker to Tucson in the 1880s, including a battle between coyotes and the U.S. Cavalry. Call 885-0862, or visit tucsonregionalballet.org for tickets and more information.

UPCOMING BALLET TUCSON UA Centennial Hall. 1020 E. University Blvd. 6213364. The Nutcracker is staged from Friday through Sunday, Dec. 21 through 23. Showtimes are 7:30 p.m., Friday; 2 and 7:30 p.m., Saturday; and 1 and 5 p.m., Sunday; $17 to $56. Visit uapresents.org, or call 6213341 for tickets and more information.

FREE TANGO LESSONS AND DANCE Casa Vicente Restaurante Español. 375 S. Stone Ave. 884-5253. A free class for beginners (no partner necessary) takes place from 7 to 8 p.m., each Wednesday; and tango-dancing continues from 8 to 10 p.m.; free.

Call 245-6158 for information.

FREE ZUMBA CLASS Bookmans. 3733 W. Ina Road. 579-0303. Instructor Leslie Lundquist leads a workout for all skill levels, from 9:30 to 10:30 a.m., every Thursday; free.

SCOTTISH COUNTRY-DANCE LESSONS Vineyard Church Hall. 625 N. Second Ave. 791-9971.

Reels, jigs and strathspeys are taught in a fun and social dance class from 7 to 9 p.m., every Thursday; $5 class, $15 per month. Beginners are welcome. Call 319-8468 or 203-7987 for more information.

MUSIC EVENTS THIS WEEK ARIZONA REPERTORY SINGERS The 50-member repertory ensemble performs a mix of choral works and sacred masterpieces, at 7:30 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14, at the Benedictine Monastery, 800 N. Country Club Road; and at 3 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16, at Fountain of Life Lutheran Church, 710 S. Kolb Road; $15. Visit arsingers.org for tickets; call 792-8141 for more info.

JIM HOWELL BAND Park Place Mall. 5870 E. Broadway Blvd. 748-1222.

Three-time TAMMIES-winner drummer Jim Howell leads his band in a set of indie rock and soul music at 6 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free.

MUSICA SONORA Grace St. Paul’s Episcopal Church. 2331 E. Adams St. 327-6857. Southern Arizona’s professional early-music ensemble performs baroque Christmas music, at 3 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16; $15, $5 student, at the door. Visit musicasonora.org for reservations and more information.

NOSSA BOSSA NOVA Bookmans. 1930 E. Grant Road. 325-5767. The band performs traditional Christmas songs with a Brazilian beat and Portuguese lyrics, from 1 to 2:30 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16; free.

OLD PUEBLO BRASS BAND A British-style band with 30 musicians, the Old Pueblo Brass Band performs at 7 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14, at Foothills Mall, 7401 N. La Cholla Blvd.; freewill donation. Email fuegal7@hotmail.com for more information.

SOUTHERN ARIZONA WOMEN’S CHORUS A Retro Christmas is the theme of a concert at 7 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14, at Catalina Foothills High School, 4300 E. Sunrise Drive; and 4 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16, at Ascension Lutheran Church, 1220 W. Magee Road; $18. Visit southernarizonawomenschorus.org.

DANCING IN THE STREETS AZ Fox Tucson Theatre. 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515.

Students and local celebrities perform The Nutcracker (El Cascanueces) accompanied by the Civic Orchestra of Tucson, at 7 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 22; and 3 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 23; $13 to $35.

THE SONS OF ORPHEUS Thursday, Dec. 13, at 6 and 8 p.m.: Christmas concerts at San Xavier Mission with the Tucson Arizona Boys Chorus to benefit the restoration of the mission, 1980 W. San Xavier Road; $90. Visit sonsoforpheus.org.

TUCSON DANCE ACADEMY DesertView Performing Arts Center. 39900 S. Clubhouse Drive. SaddleBrooke. 825-5318. Spirit of Christmas, engages more than 100 performers in a high-energy music and dance production at 7 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14; $28, $24 advance, $18 child. Visit tickets. saddlebrooketwo.com for tickets and more information.

TSO CLASSIC Tickets are $26 to $79. Call 882-8585, or visit tucsonsymphonyorchestra.org for tickets and more information. Saturday, Dec. 15, at 8 p.m.; and Sunday, Dec. 16, at 2 p.m.: Celebrate the Season: Messiah and Bach, at Catalina Foothills High School, 4300 E. Sunrise Drive.

ZUZI! DANCE COMPANY UA Stevie Eller Dance Theatre. 1737 E. University Blvd.

621-4698. Winter Solstice Gala: Celebrating 15 Years of Dance features modern and aerial dance including special guest artists at 7:30 p.m., Friday, Dec. 21; $25, $75 includes a reception with a silent auction and music by Pablo Peregrina and the Foileros. Call 6290237, or email zuzisphere@gmail.com to reserve tickets.

Visit zuzimoveit.org for tickets and more information.

TUCSON GIRLS CHORUS UA Crowder Hall. 1020 E. University Blvd. 621-1162.

All six choirs of the 25-year-old Tucson Girls Chorus perform a Sounds of Winter Concert at 3:30 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16: $15. The touring Advanced Choir performs its commissioned work by composer Frank LaRocca. Call 577-6064 for reservations and more information.

ANNOUNCEMENTS CONTRA DANCING First United Methodist Church. 915 E. Fourth St. 6226481. Live music, callers and an alcohol- and smokefree environment are provided for contra dancing at 7 p.m., the first, third and fourth Saturday each month; $8, $7 member of Tucson Friends of Traditional Music, $6 student. An introductory lesson takes place at 6:30 p.m.; dancing begins at 7 p.m. Call 325-1902, or visit tftm.org for more information.

TUCSON GUITAR SOCIETY A UA School of Music Guitar Area recital takes place at 11 a.m., every Friday, while school is in session, at the UA Museum of Art, 1031 N. Olive Road; free. In addition, the following events are held in Holsclaw Hall, in the UA School of Music, 1017 N. Olive Road, on Sunday, Dec. 9; free: a commemorative concert in celebration of Michael Mensh, at 2:30 p.m.; and a masters recital by Thomas Viloteau at 7 p.m. Visit guitar.arizona. edu for more information.

UAPRESENTS Sunday, Dec. 16, at 7 p.m.: Celtic Woman, at Centennial Hall, 1020 E. University Blvd.; $15 to $105. Call 621-3341, or visit uapresents.org for tickets.

OUT OF TOWN CAÑADA DEL ORO BARBERSHOP CHORUS DesertView Performing Arts Center. 39900 S. Clubhouse Drive. SaddleBrooke. 825-5318. The chorus presents Holiday Harmony Salute to America and Its Music at 7 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14; $23, $20 advance. Visit tickets. saddlebrooketwo.com for tickets and more information.

COMMUNITY PERFORMING ARTS CENTER Community Performing Arts Center. 1250 W. Continental Road. Green Valley. 399-1750. Thursday, Dec. 13, at 7 p.m.: Country Classics with Levon Sterner and the Strait Country Band; $20, $18 advance. Visit performingartscenter.org for tickets and more info.

KEVIN QUAIS ESSAR AND NEELAMJIT DHILLON Bisbee Women’s Club. 7 Ledge Ave. Bisbee. (520) 432-3204. Essar plays tabla and Dhillon plays rabab to present music rooted in Afghan and Indian traditions, at 8 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15, and Sunday, Dec. 16; $10, free student. Call 432-7217, or email loveofmusic@ artentree.net for reservations and more information.

O’ NIGHT DIVINE Lord of Grace Church. 7250 N. Cortaro Road. Marana.

744-7400. The story of Christmas night is told in music by the Lord of Grace Chancel Choir, Orchestra and Children’s Chorus, at 6:30 p.m.; free. The event includes sing-along caroling, hot cocoa and cookies.

ORO VALLEY CONCERT SERIES Oro Valley Marketplace. Oracle and Tangerine roads. Oro Valley. The Coins of Catalina band performs at 6 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13; free. Visit saaca.org.

SCHOOLHOUSE CONCERT Tubac Presidio State Historic Park. 1 Burruel St. Tubac.

398-2252. Artist-in-residence Ted Ramirez presents a Christmas concert featuring Arizona’s official balladeer, a former member of the New Christy Minstrels, Dolan Ellis. at 2 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16; $20, free child age 14 or younger. Reservations are advised. Call or visit tubacpresidiopark.com for more information.

RESEARCH STUDY:

ALTERNATIVE TREATMENT FOR MAJOR DEPRESSION The University of Arizona is looking for participants for a research study on the effects of an alternative procedure on Major Depressive Disorder. This study will examine whole-body infrared heating effects on your depression, how you relate to other people in your environment, and how you spend your time in general.

ELIGIBILITY

• 18-65 years old • Medically healthy • Currently experiencing Depression for at least four weeks • Not currently taking any anti-depressant medications You will receive compensation for your time.

Call: (520) 812-6291,

UPCOMING

Or visit:

SOUTHERN ARIZONA SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA DesertView Performing Arts Center. 39900 S. Clubhouse Drive. SaddleBrooke. 825-5318. The public is invited to the final dress rehearsal of a program the orchestra will perform in China, at 7:30 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 22; $23, $21 advance. Visit sasomusic.org for tickets and more information.

http://psychiatry.arizona.edu/ research/current-studies

Welcome to

TSO POPS Tucson Music Hall. 210 S. Church Ave. 791-4101.

Dec. 22 and 23: The TSO Chorus and special guests, The Magic of Christmas. Performances are at 8 p.m.

Saturday; and 2 p.m., Sunday; $26 to $69. Call 8828585 or visit tucsonsymphonyorchestra.org for tickets.

TUCSON COMMUNITY MUSIC SCHOOL WINTER CONCERT Berger Performing Arts Center. 1200 W. Speedway Blvd.

770-3762. Symphonic Winds, the Tucson Jazz Institute big bands, and vocal jazz ensembles perform at 3 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 23; $20, $15 student or senior, free younger than 12. The TJI Ellington Big Band performs at the beginning and the end of the concert.

TUCSON FLUTE CLUB Park Place Mall. 5870 E. Broadway Blvd. 748-1222.

The club performs adaptations and arrangements of familiar melodies and original compositions for flute choir, at 6 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 22; free.

THEATER

LIVE SALSA MUSIC SAT NIGHTS 10pm!

SALSA RENGUE Sat Dec 22

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OPENING THIS WEEK IMPROV COMEDY SHOWCASE Red Barn Theatre. 948 N. Main Ave. 622-6973.

Comedy students perform improv for the first time to complete six weeks of training, at 4 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; $5, $2 with student ID. INVISIBLE THEATRE Invisible Theatre. 1400 N. First Ave. 882-9721.

Hollywood Revisited, featuring pianist Greg Schreiner, is staged at 2 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16.; $28. Call or visit invisibletheatre.com for tickets and more information.

Rush tickets are available at half-price, one half-hour before each performance.

LAFFS COMEDY CAFFÉ Laffs Comedy Caffé. 2900 E. Broadway Blvd. 3238669. Sam Singleton, Atheist Evangelist, conducts a

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DANCE LESSONS BY

JEANNIE TUCKER

SATURDAY NIGHTS 2744 East Broadway (520) 881-2744 elparadortucson.com

DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

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THEATER

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revival of sorts at 7 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16; $15, $10 student. Irreligious and adult language is assured. Visit freethoughtarizona.org for reservations and more info.

ODYSSEY ALUMNI PARTY Everyone who has ever told a story for Odyssey Storytelling is invited to attend a celebration of each other and to say farewell to Odyssey founder Penelope Starr, from 7 to 10 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; freewill donation. Adam Hostetter, Sarah K. Smith, Roscoe Mutz and Shannon Snapp will be taking Odyssey Storytelling forward. Food and wine are served; guests are invited to bring snacks to share. RSVP to adam@ odysseystorytelling.com for location and other info.

PERFORMING ARTS Arizona Onstage’s stunning ‘Lady Day’ brings Billie Holidayy to Life

Lady Sings the Blues

BY LAURA C.J. OWEN, lowen@tucsonweekly.com m

CONTINUING

ARIZONA THEATRE COMPANY Temple of Music and Art. 330 S. Scott Ave. 884-4875.

Jane Austen’s Emma runs through Saturday, Dec. 22; $40 to $75. Showtimes vary. Call or visit arizonatheatre. org for tickets or more information.

COMEDY PLAYHOUSE Comedy Playhouse. 3620 N. First Ave. 260-6442.

Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol continues through Sunday, Dec. 30. Showtimes are 7:30 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and 3 p.m., Sunday; $18, discounts available. Call or visit thecomedyplayhouse.com for tickets or more information.

LIVE THEATRE WORKSHOP Live Theatre Workshop. 5317 E. Speedway Blvd. 3274242. It’s a Wonderful Life: A Live Radio Play continues through Saturday, Dec. 29. Showtimes are 7:30 p.m., Thursday through Saturday; and 3 p.m., Sunday; $18, $16 senior, military or student. Call or visit livetheatreworkshop.org for tickets and more info.

PINNACLE PEAK PISTOLEROS Trail Dust Town. 6541 E. Tanque Verde Road. 2964551. A holiday-themed Wild West stunt show, Santa’s Little Outlaws, continues through through Monday, Dec. 31. Showtimes are 7 and 8 p.m., Monday through Friday; and 6, 7 and 8 p.m., Saturday and Sunday; $4, $2 child younger than 12. Visit wildweststuntshow.com, or call 398-5618 for more information.

THE GASLIGHT THEATRE The Gaslight Theatre. 7010 E. Broadway Blvd. 8869428. Scrooge: A Gaslight Musical continues through Sunday, Jan. 6; $17.95, $7.95 child age 12 and younger, $15.95 student, military and senior. Dates and times vary. Visit thegaslighttheatre.com for reservations.

LAST CHANCE BEOWULF ALLEY THEATRE COMPANY Beowulf Alley Theatre Company. 11 S. Sixth Ave. 882-0555. Marie Antoinette: The Color of Flesh closes Sunday, Dec. 16. Showtimes are 7:30 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and 2:30 p.m., Sunday; $8 to $20. Call or visit beowulfalley.org for tickets and more information.

UPCOMING BORDERLANDS THEATER Leo Rich Theater. 260 S. Church Ave. 791-4101.

Music by a Waila band and Christmas carols in Spanish and English accompany an original adaptation of the nativity story with today’s news providing dramatic leitmotifs in A Tucson Pastorela, at 7:30 p.m., Thursday through Saturday, Dec. 20 through 22; and 2 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 23; $7 to $24. Desserts and a meet-andgreet are featured Friday, Dec. 21. The Sunday matinee includes a pre-play performance by Ballet Folklórico Tapatío. Call 882-7406, or visit borderlandstheater.org for tickets and more information.

Find more @ .com 36 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

illie, you’re a genius,” wrote songwriter Stephin Merritt of the band the Magnetic Fields, “enough to be a fool.”

The “Billie” in question, jazz singer Billie Holiday, is remembered almost equally for the genius of her vocal stylings and the foolish tragedy of her personal life. Arizona Onstage Productions pays homage to Holiday’s life and music in its production of Lady Day at Emerson’s Bar and Grill.

Musically and atmospherically, the evening is stunning, with beautiful renditions of Holiday songs to live music. Actor/singer Anna Anderson successfully captures some of Lady Day’s verve and vulnerability. While she does not look or sound exactly like the icon, the dark charisma of her portrayal captures a little of Holiday’s essence.

Anderson’s performance alternates between manic high spirits and profound sadness as she makes her way through the Holiday catalog.

She sings tunes that Billie co-wrote—“God Bless the Child” and “Don’t Explain”—as well as numbers by others that she made iconic, such as the 1939 protest song “Strange Fruit,” which deals with lynching in the South.

Ever since Holiday died from substance abuse in 1959, artists have used her melancholy and her music for inspiration. There’s Frank O’Hara’s 1964 poem “The Day Lady Died,” as well as Merritt’s 1999 song “My Only Friend,” in which he reflects that Holiday was a “miracle” and a “fool to gamble everything and never know the rules.”

This show, conceived by writer Lanie Robertson and originally produced off-Broadway in 1986, is part play, part musical and part reverie. It imagines Lady Day in 1959, at one of her final performances in the titular Philadelphia bar.

The Cabaret Theater at the Temple of Music and Art has been turned by director Kevin Johnson and set-designer Michael Boyd into a real cabaret space. In front of the stage, patrons can reserve a small table and purchase drinks before the show. Lighting designer Zach Ciaburri adds some fake smoke to the dim atmosphere, completing the evocation of a jazz nightclub.

Anderson’s live singing is backed by professional pianist Collin Shook, who plays Jimmy Powers, Holiday’s accompanist. He’s there to encourage her to get back on track whenever she becomes too disconsolate.

Shook, who has just a few lines, is clearly no actor, but he doesn’t need to be—he’s there to play the piano, which he does beautifully. Yet his presence serves as a focus for some of Holiday’s monologues. Sometimes she calls him “Jimmy,” sometimes “Sonny”—a reference

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PATRICK MCARDLE

ARIZONA ONSTAGE Temple of Music and Art Cabaret Theater. 330 S. Scott Ave. 884-4875. Lady Day at Emerson’s Bar and Grill, featuring Tucson jazz singer Anna Anderson and pianist Collin Shook in a representation of a 1959 cabaret performance by Billie Holiday, continues through Sunday, Dec. 23. Showtimes are 7 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and 2:30 p.m., Sunday; $20 to $37.50. Call (800) 838-3006, or visit arizonaonstage.org for tickets and more information.

Anna Anderson in Arizona Onstage Productions’ Lady Day at Emerson’s Bar and Grill. to Jimmy “Sonny” Monroe, a heroin addict Lady Day at who started Holiday on the path toward narEmerson’s Bar and Grill cotics addiction. He clearly stands in for Presented by Arizona Onstage Productions Holiday’s troubled relationships with men.

In addition to the piano, there is a bass-play- 7:30 p.m., Friday and Saturday; 2:30 p.m., Sunday, through Sunday, Dec. 23 er. (Duties are shared by professional musicians Kirk Kuykendall and Dylan DeRobertis.)

Temple of Music and Art Cabaret Theater All three musicians are excellent; there is no 330 S. Scott Ave. need to pretend that we are watching profes$27.50 regular; $22.50 students and sional musicians perform, because that is seniors; $37.50 for front-table seating exactly what we are doing.

Runs 90 minutes, with no intermission The play itself suffers from having to summarize Holiday’s troubled life in too short of a span. 882-6574 (info); (800) 838-3006 (tickets); Too much exposition between musical numbers arizonaonstage.org occasionally means that the pace drags.

Dressed in an evening gown and long white gloves, Anderson’s Holiday chats with the audi- her to rush offstage or grow irritable and conence between songs. She tells stories about her fused. Chief among these is her tumultuous life, which was marked by poverty, abuse and relationship with the heroin-addict Sonny. In racism.

1947, Holiday was arrested on charges of In a memorable sequence, Holiday rememdrug-possession and spent time in jail, which bers touring as the only black member of Artie marked the beginning of her professional and Shaw’s band in the 1930s. Holiday had to enter personal decline. restaurants and clubs through the back or eat Throughout Lady Day, Anderson frequently in the kitchen, away from the white customers. returns to the upbeat number “What a Little When a white hostess once refused to let Moonlight Can Do,” even as her character Holiday use the bathroom, Holiday peed all grows increasingly disoriented. As she begs for over the woman’s shoes. “some moonlight” throughout the night, it Anderson’s Holiday cackles with glee while becomes clear that Holiday is talking about recounting this tale. A strength of her perforheroin. When she staggers back onstage near mance (and Robertson’s script) is a focus on the end, we can see bloody track marks—that Holiday’s sense of humor, and her ability to find telltale sign of heroin use—peeking out from grim delight in otherwise painful moments. the top of those long white evening gloves.

Anderson adds self-deprecating laughs to As a musical evening, Lady Day is very suchair-raising stories. She describes Holiday’s cessful. As a character study, it’s more of a discovery of jazz music while working as a summary of Holiday’s life than an in-depth maid in a brothel, and her eventual leap into look. Still, it’s in the songs that Holiday truly professional singing when she was desperate to left a part of herself, and it’s moving to see her avoid working as a prostitute herself. live on through this tribute to her music. As Yet certain parts of her tale tumble Merritt wrote, “Some of us can only live in Anderson’s Holiday into deep despair, causing songs of love and trouble.”

VISUAL ARTS A tour of downtown galleries and museums reveals numerous fine holiday-themed treats

Art of the Season

BY MARGARET REGAN, mregan@tucsonweekly.com white star hangs in a midnight sky, and an angel is there to guide the way.

But the two men walking the desert in “For Those Who Went Before Us” are not shepherds looking for the Christ child. They’re migrants looking to save their own lives.

The angel walks just behind them. He’s dressed as they are, in jeans and sneakers, and like them, he’s carrying jugs of water. But he has white wings on his back instead of a backpack: He’s leading the men safely out of the wilderness, walking them past white crosses marking the desert’s dead.

I found this radiant oil on canvas by Lydia Maldonado at Contreras Gallery last week, on a Christmastime tour of downtown galleries.

Maldonado likely did not intend the work to be a Christmas painting. Migrants, after all, recount their providential encounters with angels year-round. But at this season, this work easily connects the plight of Arizona’s desert wanderers to the Christmas story, with its lost shepherds and with Mary and Joseph— impoverished travelers far from home.

Maldonado is one of six artists in the gallery’s holiday show, Reflections of the Sonoran Desert.

Carmen Sonnes’ multimedia piece “The Fence” has dried desert plants strung horizontally across a canvas to make a border wall. Standing over it is a cross of agave leaves, studded with milagros (miracles)—tiny metal arms, legs and flaming hearts that Mexicans use to pray.

Gallery co-owner Neda Contreras sticks to the desert’s beauty. Her oil “Hiding in Plain Sight” has a saguaro, a flowering palo verde and a jackrabbit nearly invisible in the dust; open 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Saturday, through Saturday, Jan. 26; closed Dec. 25 and 26, and Jan.1 and 2; 110 E. Sixth St.; 398-6557; www.contrerashousefineart.com.

Next door at Davis Dominguez, Tucson painter James Cook also sticks with the local landscape. His 15 buttery, near-realist paintings show Sabino Canyon in all its glowing glory.

Thickly painted slab rocks, more yellow palo verdes and leaf-green saguaros cascade down the canyon slopes in these oils on linen.

Sculptor Mark Rossi’s hand-worked bronzes of desert animals complement Cook’s canyons.

Right by a painted Sabino, he has a bronze mountain lion, ready to pounce. (Holiday visitors, beware: The real-life Sabino boasts a population of lions.)

Josh Goldberg fills the main gallery with lush, monumental abstractions. His gorgeous swaths of bold colors always seem to have a

A

relationship to the landscape. “Traveling to Painting” pushes the metaphor: The colors— rust, yellow, lime green—take viewers on a journey into pure beauty; 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Saturday, through Saturday, Dec. 29; closed Dec. 22 to 25; 154 E. Sixth St.; 629-9759; www.davisdominguez.com.

Conrad Wilde Gallery opens Running Amok, an exhibition of art by five women who boldly experiment with technique and media, this Saturday, Dec. 15; see City Week for details; 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday, through Saturday, Jan. 26; closed Dec. 23 through Jan. 1; reception Jan. 5; 439 N. Sixth Ave., No. 195; 622-8997; www.conradwildegallery.com.

Every year, Santa Theresa Tile Works, the tile studio led by artist Susan Gamble, comes up with new holiday ornaments. This year’s winner, hands down, is “Festive Filly,” a red-tile horse adorned with saguaros, prickly pears and a tiny San Xavier; 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., Saturday; closed Christmas and New Year’s; 440 N. Sixth Ave.; 623-8640; www.santatheresatileworks.com.

Genius outsider artist Michael Cajero was hanging a new work at Raices Taller 222 when I stopped by. The Latino arts gallery’s holiday exhibition, Tesoros Pequeños (Little Treasures), has small works priced at $222 or less. Cajero’s first contribution was snatched up on opening night, so he was replacing it with “Having Coffee,” a classic tortured Cajero in torn paper painted with black gesso, acrylic medium and pastels. Its suffering souls, a woman and man indistinctly seen among the creases, are agonizing over a café table.

Among the other Tesoros Pequeños are a small acrylic abstraction, “Organic Spring Mix,” by retired Pima professor George Welch, and explosive ink and collage portraits drawn by 18-year-old Lester Aguirre; 1 to 5 p.m., Friday and Saturday, through Saturday, Dec. 29; 218 E. Sixth St.; 881-5335.

The last chance to inspect The Drawing Studio’s Small Wonders benefit show is this Saturday, Dec. 15. A cascade of tiny art in all media, the small wonders have small prices to match; noon to 4 p.m., through Saturday, Dec. 15; 33 S. Sixth Ave.; 620-0947; www.thedrawingstudio.org.

ATLAS fine art services likewise is exhibiting Small Works, an invitational exhibition of 55 pieces by 30 artists. Big names include Jim Waid, a painter of abstracted deserts and plants, and Paco Velez, the young artist who riffs on the border’s cross-cultural collisions.

“For Those Who Went Before Us,” oil on canvas by Lydia Maldonado. along the city’s cold lake; 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Velez has two uncharacteristically lighthearted Tuesday through Saturday, through Saturday, “Borderscapes” in cheerful greens. Dare we call Jan. 5; closed Christmas and New Year’s; 135 S. them Christmasy? Waid debuts his recent turn Sixth Ave.; 624-7370; www.ethertongallery.com. toward digital: For his two “September Song” At the Temple Gallery, Valerie Galloway works, he layered digital prints on canvas and has a collection of sexy hand-painted photos. then painted atop the photos; 11 a.m. to 6 p.m., Hidden among the gender-bending nudes is a Wednesday and Thursday; 11 a.m. to 7 p.m., tiny photo of a grand cathedral—Notre Dame Friday and Saturday, through Saturday, Jan. 19; in Paris; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through 41 S. Sixth Ave.; 622-2139; Friday, and before Arizona Theatre Company www.atlasfineartservices.com. performances, through Tuesday, Jan. 8; closed In Home for the Holidays, Obsidian Gallery Dec. 24, 25 and 31, and Jan. 1; 330 S. Scott exhibits a trio of artists who strip the house Ave.; 624-7370; www.ethertongallery.com. down to its basic shape: the kindergartener’s This Friday, Dec. 14, MOCA Tucson opens box with a pointy roof. Londoner Rowena an exhibition of paintings by the acclaimed Brown’s 3-D houses are raku-fired.

Peter Young, who decamped New York for Philadelphian Robert Winokur’s are low-relief Bisbee decades ago. His lyrical abstractions ceramics. Coloradan Lynn Cornelius’ are steel frames draped with weavings; 11 a.m. to 6 p.m., explode into hundreds of brightly colored dots and circles; noon to 5 p.m., Wednesday Wednesday through Saturday, with extended through Sunday; 265 S. Church Ave.; 624hours until 8 p.m. on Thursdays; 11 a.m. to 2 5019; www.moca-tucson.org. p.m., Sunday, through Sunday, Jan. 6; 410 N. End your holiday art tour at the Tucson Toole Ave., No. 120; 577-3598; Museum of Art. With paid admission, you get www.obsidian-gallery.com to see a host of exhibitions, plus the Corbett At this time of year, the team at the House decorated for the holidays. The specPhilabaum Glass Studio and Gallery fires up tacular Nacimiento in the historic Casa luminous glass ornaments that can be hung on Cordova is free. Originally assembled by the tree. But the gallery has a regular glass art Tucsonan Maria Luisa Tena, its hundreds of show, Ins and Outs. The Ins refers to optical figures re-create scenes of Mexican village life. paintings that Wes Hunting traps inside clear, Plus, its Nativity scene honors Navidad, with solid glass. The Outs are Bob and Laurie Kliss’ Mary and Joseph adoring the baby in the witty “bobtanicals”—glass flowers growing out manger; through June 1; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., of glass pods; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday Wednesday through Saturday, with extended through Saturday, through Saturday, Jan. 26; hours to 8 p.m. on Thursday; noon to 5 p.m., closed Christmas and New Year’s; 711 S. Sixth Sunday; 140 N. Main Ave.; 624-2333; Ave.; 884-7404; www.philabaumglass.com. www.tucsonmuseumofart.org.

Seeing in Silver at Etherton Gallery celebrates three master photographers of gelatin silver Arts editor Margaret Regan reports on the arts prints, photographs shot with film: Ralph twice monthly on the Buckmaster show, which Gibson, John Loengard and Harry Callahan. airs from noon to 1 p.m., Monday through The incomparable Callahan even has a photo Friday, on KVOI AM 1030. Her next radio that marks the season. “Eleanor, Chicago,” 1949, report will be broadcast live on Tuesday, Dec. 18. pictures his wife among stripped wintry trees DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

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tory, continues until Saturday, Dec. 29. Hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; free.

ART OPENING THIS WEEK ALTERNATE HISTORIES POP-UP Pop-Cycle. 422 N. Fourth Ave. 622-3297. A pop-up show and sale of Matthew Buchholz images of a fantastic past that never was, e.g. flying saucers in the Grand Canyon and Godzilla taking down a tower at San Xavier, takes place at 11 a.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free.

BRIDGE GALLERY Bridge Gallery. 5425 N. Kolb Road, No. 113. 5774537. A group show, Christmas in the Desert, opens with an artists’ reception from 6 to 8 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13, and continues through Monday, Dec. 31.

Hours are 11 a.m. to 7 p.m., Monday through Saturday; and noon to 5 p.m., Sunday. Visit bridgegallery.net for more information.

CONRAD WILDE GALLERY Conrad Wilde Gallery. 439 N. Sixth Ave., Suite 195.

622-8997. Running Amok, an exhibit featuring the work of five women artists pushing the boundaries of process and materials in a range of media, opens Saturday, Dec. 15, and continues through Saturday, Jan. 26; free. An artists’ reception takes place from 6 to 9 p.m., Saturday, Jan. 5. Hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; free.

MANY HANDS COURTYARD Many Hands Courtyard. 3054 N. First Ave. 419-7191.

An art fair, including Mata Ortiz pottery, Oaxacan woodcarving, gourd art, coil basketry, a woodcarving demonstration and free craft classes takes place from 9:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free. The band Greenwood provides live music from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m.

Refreshments are available. Visit manyhandscourtyard. com for more information.

TOHONO CHUL PARK Tohono Chul Park. 7366 N. Paseo del Norte. 742-6455.

Art of the Cosmos, works by regional artists inspired by the night sky, opens Friday, Dec. 14, and continues through Sunday, March 24. Gallery hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., daily; $8, $6 senior, $5 active military, $4 student with valid ID, $2 ages 5 through 12, free member or child younger than 5, includes admission to the park.

Visit tohonochulpark.org for more information.

TUCSON CLAY CO-OP Tucson Clay Co-op. 3326 N. Dodge Blvd. 792-6263. An exhibit and sale of works by co-op members opens with a reception including music and refreshments from 6 to 10 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14, and continues from 11 a.m to 4 p.m., Saturday and Sunday, Dec. 15 and 16; free admission.

CONTINUING ART INSTITUTE OF TUCSON Art Institute of Tucson. 5099 E. Grant Road. 3182700. Mostly Magic, an exhibit of paintings by Al Tucci, former director of the UA School of Theatre Arts, continues through Friday, Jan. 11. Hours are from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; and 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday; free.

ARTHRITIS ASSOCIATES Arthritis Associates. 2101 N. Country Club Road, No. 3. 792-1265. An exhibit of oil paintings of horses and donkeys at work in the 19th century continues through Thursday, Feb. 7. Hours are 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Wednesday and Friday; and 8 a.m. to noon, Thursday; free.

ARTSEYE GALLERY ArtsEye Gallery. 3550 E. Grant Road. 325-0260.

Landings, an exhibit of work by Stephen Strom and Stu Jenks, continues through Thursday, Feb. 14. Hours are 9 a.m. to 6 p.m., Monday through Friday; and 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; free. Visit artseye.com for more information.

ATLAS FINE ART SERVICES Atlas Fine Art Services. 41 S. Sixth Ave. 622-2139.

A group exhibition of works created on a small scale, smallWORKS, continues through Saturday, Jan. 19.

Hours are 11 a.m. to 5:30 p.m., Wednesday and Thursday; 11 a.m. to 7 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and by appointment Monday and Tuesday; free.

BLACK CROWN COFFEE CO. Black Crown Coffee. 4024 E. Speedway, Blvd. 2076473. An exhibit of brightly colored canvases by local artist continues through Monday, Dec. 31. Hours are 8 a.m. to noon, daily.

CONTRERAS GALLERY Contreras Gallery. 110 E. Sixth St. 398-6557.

Reflections of the Sonoran Desert, an exhibit of works by six artists inspired by the Sonoran Desert and its his38 WWW. WEEKLY.COM

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reception takes place from 12:30 to 3 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16. Hours are 2 to 4 p.m., Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday.

DAVIS DOMINGUEZ GALLERY Davis Dominguez Gallery. 154 E. Sixth St. 629-9759.

An exhibit of Josh Goldberg’s abstract paintings and works on paper, and Sabino Canyon, a joint exhibit of paintings by James Cook and bronzes by Mark Rossi, continue through Saturday, Dec. 29. Hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; and 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Saturday; free. Call or visit davisdominguez.com.

OBSIDIAN GALLERY Obsidian Gallery. 410 N. Toole Ave., No. 120. 5773598. Home for the Holidays, an exhibit of works by Rowena Brown, Lynn Cornelius and Robert Winokur, continues through Saturday, Jan. 5. Hours are 11 a.m to 6 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; free. Call or visit obsidian-gallery.com for more information.

DESERT ARTISANS’ GALLERY Desert Artisans’ Gallery. 6536 E. Tanque Verde Road.

722-4412. The Twenty-Fifth Anniversary Art Gala continues through Sunday, Feb. 3. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Saturday; and 10 a.m. to 1:30 p.m., Sunday. Visit desertartisansgallery.com for more information.

PHILABAUM GLASS GALLERY AND STUDIO Philabaum Glass Gallery and Studio. 711 S. Sixth Ave. 884-7404. The Ins and Outs, featuring work by Wes Hunting and Bob and Laurie Kliss, continues through Saturday, Jan. 26. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; free. Call or visit philabaumglass.com for more information.

DRAGONFLY GALLERY Amity Foundation’s Dragonfly Gallery. 146 E. Broadway Blvd. 628-3164. The Divine Feminine: A Three-Woman Exhibition continues through Thursday, Jan. 10. Hours are from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., Monday through Friday; and 5 to 10 p.m., Saturday; free.

PORTER HALL GALLERY Porter Hall Gallery. Tucson Botanical Gardens, 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 326-9686, ext. 10. Sonoran Inspired!, an exhibit of fiber art by Nancy Polster, continues through Monday, Jan. 14. An artist’s reception takes place from 5 to 7:30 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13. Regular hours are 8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., daily; $13, $4 age 4 through 12, free younger child, $12 student, senior and military personnel, includes admission to the park. Visit tucsonbotanical.org for more information.

ETHERTON GALLERY Etherton Gallery. 135 S. Sixth Ave. 624-7370. An exhibit of photographs by John Loengard, Ralph Gibson and Harry Callahan continues through Saturday, Jan. 5.

Hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; and by appointment; free. Visit ethertongallery.com.

THE IMAGE COLLECTOR GALLERY The Image Collector Gallery. 417 N. Fourth Ave. 9770267. A Glimpse of Cuba, a collection of images taken

by David Scott Moyer in four Cuban cities last April, continues from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m., daily, through Monday, Dec. 31; free. Search for “A Glimpse of Cuba” on Facebook for more information.

JOEL D. VALDEZ MAIN LIBRARY Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. Exhibits of paintings by Serena Tang and photography by Chris Brozek run through Monday, Dec. 31.

An artist’s reception for Chris Brozek takes place from 2 to 5 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 16. A display featuring a snowy miniature village complete with a moving train continues through Sunday, Dec. 30. Models That Tell a Story: The Art of Dioramas and Vignettes, an exhibit of various types of models, runs through Thursday, May 30, 2013. Library hours are 9 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Wednesday; 9 a.m. to 6 p.m., Thursday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 5 p.m., Sunday; free. Call 791-4010, or email askalibrarian@pima.gov for more information.

JOSEPH GROSS GALLERY Joseph Gross Gallery. 1031 N. Olive Road, No. 108.

626-4215. Cheryl Molnar’s Subdivision #3, an installation exploring the paradox of suburban living, continues through Wednesday, Jan. 9. Hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; free. Visit cfa.arizona.edu/ galleries for more information.

KIRK-BEAR CANYON BRANCH LIBRARY Kirk-Bear Canyon Branch Library. 8959 E. Tanque Verde Road. 594-5275. All Over Everywhere: The Art of Joan LaRue and Jane Barton continues through Saturday, Dec. 29. Hours are 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 5 p.m., Sunday; free.

KRIKAWA JEWELRY DESIGNS Krikawa Jewelry Designs. 4280 N. Campbell Ave., No. 107. 322-6090. A juried exhibition of one-of-a-kind jewelry by Tucson jewelry artists continues through Thursday, Jan. 31. Hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; and 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., Saturday; free.

MADARAS GALLERY Madaras Gallery. 3001 E. Skyline Road, Suite 101.

615-3001. Desert Holiday, an exhibit of snow scenes and other Southwest holiday paintings by Diana Madaras, continues through Monday, Dec. 31. A reception featuring a 12-foot tree decorated with Madaras’ Southwestern ornaments takes place from 5 to 7 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 6; free, but an RSVP is requested. The reception is part of a holiday Art Walk among nearby galleries. Carolers and refreshments are included.

MONTEREY COURT STUDIO GALLERIES AND CAFÉ Monterey Court Studio Galleries and Café. 505 W. Miracle Mile. 207-2429. Watercolor Images of an Impermanent World, an exhibit of work by Julia Graf, continues through Monday, Jan. 14; free. Visit montereycourtaz.com for more information.

MURPHEY GALLERY Murphey Gallery. St. Philip’s in the Hills Episcopal Church. 4440 N. Campbell Ave. 299-6421. The Tucson Pastel Society Holiday Charity Show continues through Thursday, Jan. 10. Sales proceeds benefit the Ronald McDonald House of Southern Arizona. An artists’

RAICES TALLER 222 ART GALLERY AND WORKSHOP Raices Taller 222 Art Gallery and Workshop. 218 E. Sixth St. 881-5335. Tesoros Pequeños (Little Treasures), an exhibit of affordable small works, continues from 1 to 5 p.m., Friday and Saturday, through Saturday, Dec. 29; free.

RITA WATTERS ART GALLERY AND CRAFTERS GIFT SHOP Rita Watters Art Gallery and Crafters Gift Shop. 6541 E. Tanque Verde Road, No. 27. 777-7034. A collection of works suitable for gift-giving continues through Thursday, Jan. 3. Hours are 1 to 9 p.m., Tuesday through Sunday; free.

SHERATON HOTEL AND SUITES Sheraton Hotel and Suites. 5151 E. Grant Road. 3236262. Fall/Winter Fine Art Exhibit, featuring works by members of the Southern Arizona Arts Guild, continues through Sunday, April 7, 2013. The exhibit is open 24 hours, daily, on the first and second floors; free.

TEMPLE GALLERY Temple Gallery. Temple of Music and Art. 330 S. Scott Ave. 624-7370. An exhibit of illustrations by Valerie Galloway continues through Wednesday, Jan. 9. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; free. Call 622-2823, or e-mail info@ethertongallery.com.

TOHONO CHUL PARK Tohono Chul Park. 7366 N. Paseo del Norte. 742-6455.

Horse Country: Horses in the Southwest, depicting the role of horses in Southwestern history, and an exhibit of work by Tucsonan Wil Taylor run through Sunday, Jan. 20. The Mayan Calendar runs through Saturday, Feb. 9.

Gallery hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., daily; $8, $6 senior, $5 active military, $4 student with valid ID, $2 ages 5 through 12, free member or child younger than 5, includes admission to the park. Visit tohonochulpark.org for more information.

TUCSON INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT Tucson International Airport. 7250 S. Tucson Blvd.

573-8100. An exhibit of works by Cima Bozorgmehr, Betina Fink, Katya Micklewight, Barbara Strelke and Dee Transu continues through Saturday, Feb. 2, in the Lower Link Gallery; free. The gallery is open 24 hours every day.

TUCSON PIMA ARTS COUNCIL Pioneer Building. 100 N. Stone Ave. 207-5182.

Navigations, an exhibition of work that engages the eye in visual exploration, continues through Thursday, Jan. 10. Hours are 9 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., Monday through Friday; free. Call 624-0595, ext. 10, for more info.

UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST CHURCH Unitarian Universalist Church. 4831 E. 22nd St. 7481551. Paintings of Frances Dorr continues through Sunday, Jan. 6. Hours are 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Wednesday through Friday; and 11:30 a.m. to 1 p.m., Sunday; free.

WEE GALLERY Wee Gallery. 439 N. Sixth Ave., No. 171. 360-6024.

Marcy Miranda Janes: New Works in Cut Paper continues through Saturday, Dec. 29. Hours are 11 a.m. to 6 p.m., Thursday through Saturday; free.

WOMANKRAFT WomanKraft. 388 S. Stone Ave. 629-9976. The Holiday Bazaar continues through Saturday, Dec. 22. Hours are 1 to 5 p.m., Wednesday through Saturday; free.

ZOË BOUTIQUE Zoë Boutique. 735 N. Fourth Ave. 740-1201. Art and ornaments by a dozen Tucson artists are featured for sale through Thursday, Jan. 31. Hours are 11 a.m. to 7 p.m., Monday through Saturday; free admission.

LAST CHANCE THE DRAWING STUDIO The Drawing Studio. 33 S. Sixth Ave. 620-0947. Small Wonders, a collection of affordable original jewelry and other works by faculty, students and other artist friends, closes Saturday, Dec. 15. Hours are noon to 4 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; and noon to 4 p.m., and 6 to 9 p.m., for the First Saturday Art Walk. Proceeds benefit the studio’s youth, senior and scholarship programs.

MARK SUBLETTE MEDICINE MAN GALLERY Mark Sublette Medicine Man Gallery. 6872 E. Sunrise Drive. 722-7798. Mell Modern, an exhibit of modernist work by painter and sculptor Ed Mell, closes Friday, Dec. 14. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Saturday; and 1 to 4 p.m., Sunday; free. Visit medicinemangallery.com for more information.

OLLI-UA FINE ART GALLERY University Services Annex Building. 220 W. Sixth St. 626-9039. Transforming Wilderness: Wildflower Portraiture by Roxanne Duke closes Friday, Dec. 14.

Hours are 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; free.

VILLAGE BLACKSMITH SCULPTURE GARDEN The Village Blacksmith. 2967 N. Alvernon Way. 3257650. An artists’ reception for one-of-a-kind forgedsteel and stainless-steel sculptures, including wildlife, contemporary, abstract and kinetic, takes place from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free. Refreshments are available.

OUT OF TOWN BIOSPHERE 2 CENTER Biosphere 2 Center. 32540 S. Biosphere 2 Road.

Oracle. 838-6200. The Art of All Possibilities, an interdisciplinary exhibition that relates art to the scientific research, architecture and culture of Biosphere 2, continues through Thursday, Feb. 28. Hours are 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., daily; $10 to $20.

HILLTOP GALLERY Hilltop Gallery. 730 Hilltop Drive. Nogales. (520) 2875515. Exhibits of 40 velvet paintings of Jesus and Mary from the Velveteria, glass art by Madeline Thorpe, jewelry by Sally Hoffman and ceramics by Mike Garino continue through Sunday, Dec. 30. Hours are 12:30 to 4:30 p.m., Tuesday through Sunday; free.

OAXACAN WOODCARVING DEMONSTRATION Western National Parks Association. 12880 N. Vistoso Village Drive. Oro Valley. 622-6014. Agustín Cruz Tinoco, a woodcarver from the village of San Agustín de las Juntas near Oaxaca, demonstrates his craft from 9:30 a.m. to 4 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13; free.

Reservations are not required.

SAM POE GALLERY Sam Poe Gallery. 24 Main St. Bisbee. (520) 4325338. The Inside Outside Home and Garden Show closes Saturday, Dec. 15. Hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Sunday; free.

SPIRIT GALLERY Spirit Gallery. 516 Tombstone Canyon Road. Bisbee.

(520) 249-7856. An exhibit of work by Sharon Lee is celebrated with a reception including food, wine and music by the Tin Can Tourists from 3:30 to 5:30 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15. Free.

TOSCANA STUDIO AND GALLERY Toscana Studio and Gallery. 9040 N. Oracle Road. Oro Valley. 575-1445. A holiday gathering takes place from 4 to 7 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13; free. Regular hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; and noon to 4 p.m., Saturday; free. Visit toscanastudiosandgallery. com for more information.

TUBAC PRESIDIO STATE HISTORIC PARK Tubac Presidio State Historic Park. 1 Burruel St. Tubac.

398-2252. Southwestern Vistas, an exhibit of landscape paintings by Tubac artist Walter Blakelock Wilson, continues through Tuesday, April 30. Hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., daily; $5, $2 ages 7 through 13.

VENTANA MEDICAL SYSTEMS GALLERY Ventana Medical Systems Gallery. 1910 E. Innovation Park Drive, Building No. 2. Oro Valley. 887-2155. An exhibit of two-dimensional work in a range of media, representing artists who are, or are inspired by, cancer survivors, continues through Friday, Jan. 4. Hours are by appointment with 48 hours notice.

ANNOUNCEMENTS CALL FOR ARTISTS Tucson Arts Brigade seeks artists to create work on 22-by-30-inch high-quality paper that will be provided.

The finished works will be included in a traveling artshow fundraiser, and auctioned sometime in 2013.

Artists receive promotion, plus 30 percent of the auction amount for their work. The deadline for submissions is Feb. 1, 2013. Phone 520-623-2119, email curator@ tucsonartsbrigade.org, or visit tucsonartsbrigade.com.

CALL FOR ARTISTS WomanKraft. 388 S. Stone Ave. 629-9976.

Submissions are sought for several upcoming exhibits.

Deadlines are Saturday, Jan. 26, 2013, for Scenes From the Trails We Travel, Saturday, Feb. 2, through Saturday, March 30, 2013; Saturday, March 23, 2013, for Drawing Down the Muse, works by women, Saturday, April 6, through Saturday, May 25, 2013; and Saturday, June 22, 2013, for It’s All About the Buildings, Saturday, July 6, through Saturday, Aug. 24, 2013. Call for more information.

CALL FOR ARTISTS Agua Caliente Park Ranch House Gallery. 12325 E. Roger Road. 749-3718. Artists are sought to show their work for one of a series of four-week exhibitions planned for the calendar year 2014. Work must reflect nature, wildlife, landscapes, Southwestern themes or local cultures that are in keeping with the park’s setting. Thursday, Jan. 10, is the application deadline.

Email aguacalientepark@pima.gov, or call 749-3718 for details.

CALL FOR CLOTHING DESIGNERS The deadline is Monday, Feb. 11, for applications to participate in Tucson Fashion Week in October. Visit tucsonfashionweek.com for an application; email tucsonfashionweek@gmail.com for more information.

CALL FOR NOMINATIONS Nominees are sought for the 2013 Governor’s Arts Awards. Categories are artist; arts in education, individual; arts in education, organization; business; community; and individual. For nomination forms and more information, visit governorsartsawards.org. The deadline is 5 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14.

THE FIBER SHOP Bisbee Community Y. 26 Howell St. Bisbee. Works by members of the Bisbee Fiber Arts Guild are displayed for sale every Friday and Saturday through Friday, March 1, 2013. Hours are 10 a.m. to 6 p.m.; free admission.

OPEN STUDIO ART CLASSES WomanKraft. 388 S. Stone Ave. 629-9976. Anyone can make crafts for free from 1 to 4 p.m., every second Friday and Saturday. Visit womankraft.org.

SOUTHWESTERN LEAGUE OF FINE ARTISTS Ward 6 City Council Office. 3202 E. First St. 791-4601.

Speakers, demonstrations and conversations among artists are featured at meetings from 1 to 3 p.m., the third Monday of every month. Members’ works are exhibited at the Old Pueblo Grille and at other sites throughout the year. Any artist is welcome to join the group.

MUSEUMS EVENTS THIS WEEK ARIZONA HISTORY MUSEUM Arizona History Museum. 949 E. Second St. 628-5774.

100 Years: 100 Quilts continues through Saturday, Dec. 29. The quilts, created for the state’s centennial, depict Arizona landscapes, cultures, historical places and unique events. Hours are 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., Monday through Saturday; $5, $4 senior or age 12 through 18, free younger child. Visit arizonahistoricalsociety.org.

Jan. 20. Ted DeGrazia Depicts the Life of Padre Eusebio Francisco Kino: 20 Oil Paintings is on permanent display. Hours are 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., daily; free. Call or visit degrazia.org for more information.

INTERNATIONAL WILDLIFE MUSEUM International Wildlife Museum. 4800 W. Gates Pass Road. 629-0100. “Winter Wildlife” decorations throughout the museum are revealed from 5 to 7 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; $8, $6 senior and military with ID, $3 child age 4 through 12, free younger child.

The event features scavenger hunts, games and crafts focused on winter-loving animals and their habitats, and the Tucson Food Truck Roundup. Santa Claus stops in for picture-taking from 5 to 7 p.m. Visit thewildlifemuseum.org for more information.

MINI-TIME MACHINE MUSEUM OF MINIATURES Mini-Time Machine Museum of Miniatures. 4455 E. Camp Lowell Drive. 881-0606. Holiday decorations throughout the museum continue through Sunday, Jan. 6. Decor includes more than a dozen miniatures depicting holiday traditions, through history and around the world. Holiday musical performances and craft projects are also featured. Hours are 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday, except Christmas Day; and noon to 4 p.m., Sunday; $9, $8 senior or military, $6 age 4 to 17, $6 adults Thursday through Dec. 27, free younger child.

Visit theminitimemachine.org for more information.

MOCA MOCA. 265 S. Church Ave. 624-5019. An exhibit of Peter Young’s large-scale abstract paintings from the 1960s to the present opens at 8 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14, and continues through Sunday, March 31. Regular gallery hours are noon to 5 p.m., Wednesday through Sunday; $8, free member, child younger than 17, veteran, active military and public-safety officers, and everyone the first Sunday of each month. Call or visit moca-tucson.org for more info.

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WESTERN NATIONAL PARKS ASSOCIATION KIVA GALLERY Western National Parks Association Kiva Gallery.

12880 N. Vistoso Village Drive. Oro Valley. 622-6014.

Scenes From the West, an exhibit of paintings by Dick Myers, continues through Saturday, Dec. 22; and from Wednesday, Dec. 26, through Saturday, Dec. 29. Hours are 9:30 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Saturday; free. The gallery is closed for lectures from noon to 1 p.m., and from 2 to 3 p.m., Wednesday and Saturday.

Visit wnpa.org for more information.

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TUCSON MUSEUM OF ART Tucson Museum of Art. 140 N. Main Ave. 624-2333.

The Shape of Things: Four Decades of Paintings and Sculpture continues through Sunday, Jan. 6.

Barbara Rogers: The Imperative of Beauty, a 50-year Retrospective runs through Sunday, Jan. 13. Henri Matisse: The Pasiphaé Series and Other Works on Paper runs through Sunday, Jan. 20. The traditional holiday exhibit, El Nacimiento, continues through Saturday, June 1, 2013, in the Casa Cordova. Art + the Machine runs through Sunday, July 14, 2013. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Wednesday, Friday and Saturday; 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., Thursday; noon to 5 p.m., Sunday; closed Monday and Tuesday; $10, $8 senior, $5 college student with ID, free age 18 or younger, active military or veteran with ID, and TMA members; free the first Sunday of every month. Visit tucsonmuseumofart.org.

UA MUSEUM OF ART UA Museum of Art. 1031 N. Olive Road. 621-7567. An exhibit of drawings and prints from the UA Museum of Art’s permanent collection continues through Sunday, Jan. 6. In Relief: German Op-Art Ceramics continues through Sunday, Jan. 27. Broken Desert: Land and Sea, work by Heather Green, Greg Lindquist and Chris McGinnis that explores human impact on nature, runs through Sunday, March 3. The Samuel H. Kress Collection and the altarpiece from Ciudad Rodrigo are on display until further notice. Hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; and noon to 4 p.m., Saturday and Sunday; $5, free member, student, child, faculty and staff with ID. Visit artmuseum.arizona.edu.

OUT OF TOWN WESTERN NATIONAL PARKS ASSOCIATION Western National Parks Association. 12880 N. Vistoso Village Drive. Oro Valley. 622-6014. Exhibits, demonstrations and sales of traditional Native American arts take place from 9:30 a.m. to 4 p.m.; free. Saturday, Dec. 15: Zuni fetishes. Monday, Dec. 17, through Monday, Dec. 31: Huichol beadwork, yarn paintings, wood carvings, gourd bowls, masks and more. Saturday, Jan. 5: turquoise jewelry, including talks at 11 a.m. and 2 p.m. about how to buy it.

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DEGRAZIA GALLERY IN THE SUN DeGrazia Gallery in the Sun. 6300 N. Swan Road.

299-9191. The exhibit DeGrazia’s Unseen Treasures, a selection of paintings from a vault holding thousands of works by Ted DeGrazia, continues through Tuesday, Jan. 15. Portraits of DeGrazia, an exhibit of photographs and paintings of Ted DeGrazia, including works by Louise Serpa and Thomas Hart Benton, runs through Sunday,

DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

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City Week Guidelines. Send information for City Week to Listings Editor, Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726, e-mail our account at listings@tucsonweekly.com or submit a listing online at tucsonweekly.com. The deadline is Monday at noon, 11 days before the Thursday publication date.

Please include a short description of your event; the date, time and address where it is taking place; information about fees; and a phone number where we can reach you for more information. Because of space limitations, we can’t use all items. Event information is accurate as of press time. The Weekly recommends calling event organizers to check for last-minute changes in location, time, price, etc.

EVENTS THIS WEEK GLORIA MCMILLAN: THE BLUE MAROON MURDER Bookmans. 1930 E. Grant Road. 325-5767. Gloria McMillan signs and sells copies of her book, The Blue Maroon Murder, from 1 to 3 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free.

SOUTHWEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. A display celebrating the release of the guide, Southwest Books of the Year: Best Reading, which is the library’s guide to fiction and nonfiction books published in 2012 that feature a Southwestern setting or subject, continues through Monday, Dec. 31, in the art gallery.

Library hours are 9 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Wednesday; 9 a.m. to 6 p.m., Thursday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 5 p.m., Sunday; free. Call 791-4010, or email askalibrarian@pima.gov for more information.

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a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday and Thursday; 9 a.m. to 6 p.m., Tuesday and Wednesday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; and 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday; free. Call or visit poetrycenter.arizona.edu for more information.

OUT OF TOWN JOHN Q. OLSON: TALES OF FLYING Salazar-Ajo Branch Library. 40 Plaza St. Ajo. (520) 387-6075. Pilot and flight-instructor John Quinn Olson discusses his “Wild Blue Yonder” series: Recipes for Disaster, Taking Mexico Flying and Living Dangerously, at 1 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; free.

LOCAL AUTHORS SERIES Joyner-Green Valley Branch Library. 601 N. La Cañada Drive. Green Valley. 594-5295. Denise Roessle discusses her book Second Chance Mother at 2 p.m., Tuesday, Dec. 18; free.

ANNOUNCEMENTS ABBETT BOOK CHOICES Wheeler Taft Abbett Sr. Branch Library. 7800 N. Schisler Drive. 594-5200. Members meet to discuss popular titles recommended by other group members, at 2 p.m., the third Wednesday of every month; free.

BOOKLINKS: A BOOK CLUB FOR ADULTS Miller-Golf Links Branch Library. 9640 E. Golf Links Road. 594-5355. Men and women share insights about a wide variety of fiction and nonfiction books at 12:30 p.m., the second Friday of every month; free.

OMNIVOROUS READERS Sahuarita Branch Library. 725 W. Via Rancho Sahuarita.

Sahuarita. 594-5490. Author Maurynne Maxwell leads a discussion on a mix of contemporary fiction and nonfiction at 10 a.m., on the third Saturday of every month; free.

THIRD WEDNESDAY FICTION GROUP Mostly Books. 6208 E. Speedway Blvd. 571-0110. A group meets to discuss a work of fiction at 7 p.m., the third Wednesday of every month; free.

RIVER READERS BOOK CLUB Dusenberry River Branch Library. 5605 E. River Road.

594-5345. Adults read and discuss popular fiction titles recommended by group members at 6:30 p.m., on the third Tuesday of every month; free.

UA POETRY CENTER UA Poetry Center. 1508 E. Helen St. 626-3765.

Selections From the Permanent Collection: Big Books continues through Wednesday, Jan. 30. Hours are 9

SONORAN SLEUTHS MYSTERY BOOK CLUB Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. Oro Valley. 229-5300. Fans of mystery and suspense meet

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE

LITERATURE

BOOKS Ten years of research powers a compelling biography of a Western pioneer

Stories in Sepia Tones

BY MARGARET REGAN, mregan@tucsonweekly.com n late spring 1906, Edward S. Curtis traveled to the White Mountains of Arizona.

The photographer was buoyant. He had at long last gotten funding for his long-dreamedof project to document the Indian tribes of North America in photographs, in sound recordings and in texts that would memorialize all of their cultural practices, their languages and their religions. Now underwritten by tycoon J.P. Morgan, Curtis traveled into the Apaches’ forested mountains.

There was just one problem: The Apaches didn’t want to be photographed by this Shadow Catcher. Nor did they care to share the tenets of their religion, their songs or their founding myths, all the things that Curtis wanted for his projected 20-volume North American Indian.

For weeks, as Timothy Egan recounts in his sprawling biography, Short Nights of the Shadow Catcher: The Epic Life and Immortal Photographs of Edward Curtis, Curtis’ team idled in camp. But Curtis connected with a medicine man, Goshonné, listening empathetically to his troubles, particularly his outrage that the U.S. had outlawed Native American religious practices.

Eventually, with the added inducement of some of Morgan’s cash, Goshonné began talking to Curtis, describing the Apache way of life. Most important, he deconstructed a sacred deerskin scroll, a kind of Apache Rosetta stone whose drawings were “symbols of the Apache creation myth,” Egan relates. And once Goshonné allowed Curtis to fill his notebooks and his wax recording devices with long-held Apache secrets, other tribal members agreed to be photographed.

But Curtis’ Apache triumph was tempered by disaster. An anguished Goshonné quickly regretted betraying his people’s sacred beliefs.

His life would be short, he told Curtis. And a few months later, after Curtis was back home in Seattle, Goshonné died suddenly, of causes unknown.

This Apache tragedy could stand as a metaphor for Curtis’ entire project. A driven, gifted photographer of “bulldog tenacity,” the entrepreneurial Curtis was a successful society portraitist in late 19th-century Seattle. Early encounters with Indians, including Seattle’s

I

Short Nights of the Shadow Catcher: The Epic Life and Immortal Photographs of Edward Curtis

By Timothy Egan Houghton Mifflin Harcourt 384 pages, $28 Also: Tucson’s Etherton Gallery, 135 S. Sixth Ave., has a room devoted to Curtis’ photographs and owns Volume II, on the “Papago” and other Arizona tribes, and Volume XII, on the Hopi.

TOP TEN Antigone Books’ best-sellers for the week ending Dec. 7, 2012

SUMMER RESIDENCY AT THE POETRY CENTER UA Poetry Center. 1508 E. Helen St. 626-3765. Poets and prose-writers are invited to apply for a residency of two to four weeks between Saturday, June 1, and Saturday, Aug. 31, 2013, in order to develop their work.

Two residencies will be awarded: one in poetry, and one in prose. Writers stay in a guest house near the library and receive a stipend of $150 weekly. Guidelines for submissions are at poetry.arizona.edu.

1. Flight Behavior: A Novel Barbara Kingsolver, Harper ($28.99)

2. Julia’s Cats: Julia Child’s Life in the Company of Cats Patricia Barey and Therese Burson, Abrams ($16.95)

3. The Third Wheel (Diary of a Wimpy Kid, Book 7) Jeff Kinney, Harry N. Abrams ($13.95)

4. A Guide to Southern Arizona’s Historic Farms and Ranches: Rustic Southwest Retreats Lili DeBarbieri, History ($19.99)

Princess Angeline, drove him from this profitable path.

The prevailing view was that Indians were a vanishing race, an archaic people who would soon disappear, displaced by—among other things—the Morgan railroads that crisscrossed the West by the 1880s, and by the millions of white Americans who turned up to take their lands. Curtis, galvanized by a trip to Montana to photograph the isolated Piegan tribe, was seized by what Egan calls his Big Idea: He would document the Indians and their way of life before it was too late.

This massive undertaking, which he promised Morgan would take five years, instead took nearly 30. It cost him his marriage and his livelihood. Acclaimed in the early stages— “marvelous … remarkable … important” gushed The New York Times—the expensive volumes sold poorly and were finally forgotten.

In 1952, Curtis died penniless and alone at age 84 in a small rental in Los Angeles.

Seattle native Egan, a New York Times columnist and winner of the National Book Award, spent 10 years off and on retracing Curtis’ travels, from Arizona to Alaska. Egan tells Curtis’ tale as a cinematic adventure, and his prose is occasionally marred by an irritating gee-whiz machismo. Even so, his research is formidable and his life of the Shadow Catcher is engrossing.

Curtis’ work was rediscovered in a Boston basement in the 1970s and is now highly prized; in 2009, a 20-volume set of The North American Indian sold for $1.8 million. With its new success, the work inevitably drew new criticism. Some scholars fault Curtis’ practice of posing his Indian subjects in their ancestors’ clothing, and picturing them in a kind of timeless antiquity. And, of course, American Indians haven’t vanished at all.

But seen in the context of his time, Curtis was a progressive, a man who valued the distinctiveness of Native American culture and through his art quietly condemned the imperialism that sought to obliterate it.

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from 11 a.m. to noon, on the fourth Wednesday of every month except December; free. Each month’s topic may be found at orovalleylib.com. Call for more information.

5. Wuthering Heights Emily Bronte, Puffin ($4.99)

6. Boneshaker

LECTURES EVENTS THIS WEEK GENDER RIGHTS ACTIVIST BETTY MAKONI OF GIRL CHILD NETWORK Women’s Studies/Southwest Institute for Research on Women Building. 925 N. Tyndall Ave. 621-7338.

Gender Rights Activist Betty Makoni of Girl Child Network, an organization that has saved more than 70,000 girls from sexual violence in Zimbabwe, lectures and leads discussion from 4 to 6 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13; free. A related film, Tapestries of Hope, is screened from 4 to 6 p.m., Friday, Dec. 14; free. Discussion follows. Call 612-7044 for more information.

SUNZILLA: THE POWER LINE THAT WILL EAT THE SAN PEDRO VALLEY SEIU Meeting Room. 1600 N. Tucson Blvd., No. 100.

884-8100. A panel discussion about the proposed SunZia Transmission Project, specifically its destruction of habitat to provide energy that could otherwise be provided by renewable resources, takes place from 7 to 8:30 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 13; free. Call 623-0269.

Cherie Priest, Tor ($15.99)

7. Magnificence: A Novel Lydia Millet, W.W. Norton ($25.95)

8. Food Lovers’ Guide to Tucson: The Best Restaurants, Markets and Local Culinary Offerings Mary Paganelli Votto, Globe Pequot ($14.95)

OUT OF TOWN JACK LASSETER: FATHER KINO Tubac Presidio State Historic Park. 1 Burruel St. Tubac.

398-2252. Jack Lasseter shares the adventures and accomplishments of the 17th-century Jesuit missionary, explorer, cartographer, astronomer and agronomist Padre Eusebio Francisco Kino, from 2 to 3:30 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15; $15. Call for reservations.

Jeff Biggers, Nation ($25.99)

JACK LASSETER: THE SPANISH HISTORY OF ARIZONA DesertView Performing Arts Center. 39900 S. Clubhouse Drive. SaddleBrooke. 825-5318. Jack Lasseter presents “The Spanish History of Arizona” at 10 a.m. Thursday, Dec. 13; $20. Visit tickets.saddlebrooktwo.com.

10. This Is How You Lose Her

UPCOMING

9. State Out of the Union: Arizona and the Final Showdown Over the American Dream

Junot Díaz, Riverhead ($26.95)

Lili DeBarbieri

‘DISCOVER ART’ LECTURE SERIES Woods Memorial Branch Library. 3455 N. First Ave. 594-5445. Docents from the UA Museum of Art lecture from 2 to 3 p.m., the third Friday of every month; free.

Dec. 21: “Summer in France,” Jacquelyn Feller.

GREEN VALLEY GENEALOGICAL SOCIETY St. Francis in the Valley Episcopal Church. 600 N. La Cañada Drive. Green Valley. 625-1370. Clarice Bird presents “Understanding and Locating the Law in Family History Research,” from 1 to 3 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 20; free. A short show-and-tell program of family treasures follows. Send a one-paragraph description in advance to joannherbst@cox.net. Call 396-4630.

JESSE BALLENGER: FROM KILL SITES TO HUNTING GROUNDS La Parilla Suiza. 2720 N. Oracle Road. 624-4300.

Archaeologist Jesse Ballenger presents “From Kill Sites to Hunting Grounds: The Late Prehistoric Stone Architecture of the Two Medicine River Valley, Montana” from 6 to 8:30 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 20, as part of Old Pueblo Archaeology’s Third Thursday Food for Thought series; freewill donation. No-host food and beverages are from the menu. Reservations are requested by 5 p.m., Wednesday, Dec. 19. Call 798-1201, or email info@oldpueblo.org for reservations and more info.

TOUR OF LOS MORTEROS AND PICTURE ROCKS Archaeologist Allen Dart leads a winter solstice tour of Los Morteros, an ancient village with a Hohokam ball court, and other sites, from 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday, Dec. 21; $15, $12 member of Old Pueblo Archaeology Center or Pueblo Grande Museum Auxiliary. The tour departs from the corner of Silverbell Road and Linda Vista Boulevard. Reservations are required. Call 7981201, or email info@oldpueblo.org for more information.

DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

41

CINEMA Peter Jackson’s much-anticipated return to Middle Earth is a huge disappointment

Bilbo Bungle

TOP TEN Casa Video’s top rentals for the week ending Dec. 9, 2012

BY COLIN BOYD, cboyd@tucsonweekly.com he Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey is not a film that knows exactly where it stands. It’s astonishing to think that, because Peter Jackson returns to Middle Earth having so convincingly snake-charmed J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings. But what else can be said about a movie so anonymous, so intermittently clumsy and, ultimately, so insignificant?

The Hobbit is the first of three films in a series. But if he has so little of substance to say in the first installment, this trilogy could be awfully stale.

It isn’t just the narrative that comes up empty. Jackson shot this film in something called High Frame Rate, or HFR, 3-D, the first time it’s been used commercially. Normal film speed is 24 frames per second, but HFR shoots more frames in that same span, increasing image clarity. For 3-D, this could solve the issue of images “ghosting” as the action moves around. Sounds great, right? In the right environment, it is.

There are moments in The Hobbit that look astonishingly real and unlike a film at all.

Most of the exterior medium-to-long shots are amazing—but close-ups are brutal, and sweeping crane shots of wide areas (a Peter Jackson staple) might give you vertigo. The problem stems from HFR accelerating the motion at those extremes, or at least that’s your mind’s perception of what it sees.

Cutting between medium-range shots that look fine and close-up shots that you perceive as moving too quickly is tremendously disorienting. It is not a good experience.

Close-ups also reveal the artificiality of sets and the art of performance more than they should by eliminating the dramatic distance you normally have from … well, the artificiality of sets and the art of performance. Props look like props, and the exaggerated movements of the actors, particularly facial expressions, come off as clownish.

But buck up, Bilbo fans: This film exists in five visual formats, so if you skip the HFR 3-D, you might be OK. In fact, because the reaction to HFR has been soundly negative since footage debuted earlier in the year, plans to release it more widely in that format reportedly fell by the wayside in favor of IMAX (with or without 3-D), a traditional 3-D environment, and standard 2-D. Assuming you’ve been discouraged from HFR, Jackson’s adaptation is still too sedate to spread over this length of time. Indeed, Jackson himself told Entertainment Weekly in 2007 (when this series was planned as two

T

42 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

1. The Dark Knight Rises Warner Bros.

2. Men in Black 3 Sony

3. Savages Universal

4. Hope Springs Sony

5. The Watch 20th Century Fox

6. Lawless Starz/Anchor Bay

7. ParaNorman Universal

8. Brave Disney/Pixar

9. The Expendables 2 Lionsgate

10. Beasts of the Southern Wild Ian McKellen in The Hobbit: An Unexpected films) that The Hobbit is more “lightweight” and “simplistic” than The Lord of the Rings. As a consequence, there’s a lot of ambling punctuated by battle scenes. Generally, those fights get progressively better, but that’s little solace.

For the uninitiated, the events of The Hobbit predate the Lord of the Rings trilogy, with old, gentlemanly Bilbo (Ian Holm) writing down his epic quest for his nephew Frodo. After an interminable prologue narrated by Holm, the curtain opens for Martin Freeman to portray the younger Bilbo. Funny, flexible and not a scenechewer, Freeman is a good choice. Despite the film’s many problems, this is one thing Peter Jackson got exactly right.

Bilbo is then coerced by Gandalf (Ian McKellen) to join him on a journey—nay, an unexpected journey—to help a band of dwarfs defeat an evil dragon and return to their homeland.

Boiled down, The Hobbit is a road-trip movie with orcs and trolls lining the path. There is nothing wrong with a simple story from point A to point B. But with so little gravity between those battle scenes, and almost no true character development outside of Bilbo’s slowly growing confidence, this movie could be nearly an hour shorter—and many times better.

One subplot of note: The longest scene in the film might be the meeting between Bilbo and

Journey.

20th Century Fox

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey Rated PG-13 Starring Martin Freeman, Ian McKellen and Richard Armitage Directed by Peter Jackson Warner Bros., 169 minutes Opens Friday, Dec. 14, at AMC Loews Foothills 15 (888-262-4386), Century El Con 20 (800-3263264, ext. 902), Century Park Place 20 (800326-3264, ext. 903), Century Theatres at the Oro Valley Marketplace (800-326-3264, ext. 899), Harkins Tucson Spectrum 18 (806-4275) and Tower Theaters at Arizona Pavilions (579-0500).

Gollum (voiced and green-screened by Andy Serkis). Its importance has very little to do with The Hobbit. But because Gollum is such a pivotal figure in the Lord of the Rings trilogy, he and Bilbo engage in a lengthy riddle contest, and there is a magical gold ring involved. Serkis is fantastic again, and the scene gives The Hobbit some much-needed tension and intensity.

Unfortunately, it’s not a pulse that Jackson or the film can maintain. The Hobbit is not cleverly, or at times even carefully, assembled, with Jackson slapping in close-up shots all over the place, presumably to take advantage of the HFR 3-D instead of serving the story. Worse, it’s also not much fun. Or worth the wait.

Meryl Streep in Hope Springs.

FILM TIMES Film times reflect the most current listings available as of Tuesday evening, with screenings beginning on Friday for most opening titles.

As schedules at individual theaters frequently change post-press, we recommend calling ahead to avoid any inconvenience.

AMC Loews Foothills 15 7401 N. La Cholla Blvd.

888-262-4386.

Call for Wed film times Argo (R) Thu 10:55, 1:40, 4:25, 7:20; Fri-Tue 5:35, 8:20, 11:05 The Collection (R) ends Thu 11:30, 1:45, 4 End of Watch (R) ends Thu 11:10, 1:55, 4:30, 7:10 Flight (R) Thu 1:30, 4:35, 7:40; Fri-Sun 10:20, 1:25, 4:30, 7:35; Mon-Tue 1:25, 4:30, 7:35 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m., 12:15 a.m.; Fri-Sat 11:30, 11:55, 1, 4, 6:30, 8, 9, 9:30, 10:30, 11:45; SunTue 11:30, 11:55, 1, 4, 6:30, 8, 9, 9:30, 10:30; Wed 11:55, 1, 4, 8, 9 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey—An IMAX 3D Experience (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Wed 11, 3, 7, 11 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey 3D (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m., 12:30 a.m.; Fri-Sun 9, 10, 2, 5, 6, 10; Mon-Wed 2, 5, 6, 10 Killing Them Softly (R) Thu 12:30, 2:55, 5:15, 7:45; Fri-Tue 10:45 Life of Pi (PG) Thu 1:05, 4:15, 7:15; Fri-Sat 9:45, 12:35, 3:30; Sun 8:55, 3:30; Mon-Tue 12:35, 3:30 Life of Pi 3D (PG) Thu 11:15, 2:10, 5:10, 8:05; Fri-Tue 11:15, 2:10, 5, 7:50, 10:40 Lincoln (PG-13) Thu 1:15, 4:35, 7:50; FriSun 9:30, 11:05, 12:45, 2:20, 4:15, 7:30, 10:45; Mon-Tue 11:05, 12:45, 2:20, 4:15, 7:30, 10:45 Monsters, Inc. 3D (G) Wed 11:45, 2:15, 4:40, 7:05, 9:30 Playing for Keeps (PG13) Thu 11:15, 1:45, 4:15, 6:45, 9:15; Fri-Tue 11:45, 2:25, 4:55, 7:25, 9:55 Red Dawn (PG-13) Thu 12:40, 3, 5:30, 8; FriSun 9:05, 3:15, 5:45, 8:15, 10:35; Mon-Tue 3:15, 5:45, 8:15, 10:35 Rise of the Guardians (PG) Thu 12, 4:40, 7, 9:20; Fri-Sun 9:15, 10:25, 12:45, 5:35, 7:55, 10:15; Mon-Tue 12:45, 5:35, 7:55, 10:15 Rise of the Guardians 3D (PG) Thu 2:20; Fri-Tue 3:05 Skyfall (PG-13) Thu 11, 2:15, 5:30, 6:30, 9; FriSat 10:05, 1:15, 4:30, 7:45, 10:55; Sun 10:05, 11:45, 1:15, 4:30, 7:45, 10:55; Mon-Tue 1:15, 4:30, 7:45, 10:55 Skyfall: The IMAX Experience (PG-13) ends Thu 1:10, 4:20, 7:30

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 (PG-13) Thu 1:25, 4:10, 7; Fri-Sun 9:05, 10:45, 1:30, 4:10, 7:05, 9:45; Mon-Tue 1:30, 4:10, 7:05, 9:45 Wreck-It Ralph (PG) Thu 11:30, 2:05, 4:50, 7:35; Fri-Tue 11:10, 1:45, 4:20, 6:55

Century El Con 20 3601 E. Broadway Blvd.

800-326-3264, ext. 902.

Call for Wed film times Anna Karenina (R) Thu 1, 4, 7; Fri-Sun 10:10, 1:10, 4:10, 7:10, 10:10; Mon-Tue 1:10, 4:10, 7:10, 10:10 Argo (R) Thu 11:15, 2, 4:50, 7:35; Fri 11:15, 2, 7:35, 10:25; Sat 7:35, 10:25; Sun 11:15, 2, 7:35, 10:25; Mon 11:15, 2, 10:25; Tue 11:15, 2, 7:35, 10:25 The Collection (R) ends Thu 11:15, 1:25, 3:35, 5:45, 8 Flight (R) Thu 12:10, 3:35, 7:05; Fri-Tue 1:15, 4:20, 7:30, 10:40 Hitchcock (PG-13) Thu 11:40, 2:10, 4:40, 7:05, 9:30; Fri-Tue 11:40, 2:10, 4:40, 7:05, 9:35 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m., 12:01, 12:10, 12:20; FriSat 10:30, 11:30, 12:15, 1, 2:45, 4, 4:45, 6, 6:30, 7:40, 8:30, 10:15, 11:15; Sun 10:30, 11:30, 12:15, 1, 2:45, 4, 4:45, 6, 6:30, 7:40, 8:30, 10:15; MonWed 11:30, 12:15, 1, 2:45, 4, 4:45, 6, 6:30, 7:40, 8:30, 10:15 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey 3D (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Wed 11, 1:30, 2:15, 3:15, 5:15, 7, 9, 9:45, 10:45 It’s a Wonderful Life (PG) Wed 2, 7 Killing Them Softly (R) Thu 11:45, 2:15, 4:45, 7:15; Fri-Tue 11:50, 2:25, 5, 7:25, 9:55 Life of Pi (PG) Thu 11:20, 5:30; Fri-Sun 10:15, 1:15, 4:15, 7:15, 10:15; Mon-Tue 1:15, 4:15, 7:15, 10:15 Life of Pi 3D (PG) Thu 12:45, 2:25, 3:50, 6:55, 8:35; Fri-Tue 11:45, 3:05, 9:10 Lincoln (PG-13) Thu 11:15, 12:20, 2:35, 3:40, 5:55, 7:10, 9:20; Fri-Tue 11:15, 12:20, 2:35, 3:40, 5:55, 7:10, 9:20, 10:30 The Metropolitan Opera: Aida Live (Not Rated) Sat 10:55 The Metropolitan Opera: La Clemenza Di Tito Encore (Not Rated) Wed 6:30 Monsters, Inc. 3D (G) Wed 11:55, 2:20, 4:45, 7:10, 9:35 Playing for Keeps (PG-13) Thu 11:55, 2:40, 5:20, 7:55, 10:30; Fri-Tue 12:20, 2:55, 5:35, 8:10, 10:45 Red Dawn (PG-13) Thu 12:40, 3, 5:20, 7:45; Fri-Sun 10:55, 5:10; Mon 10:55; Tue 10:55, 5:10 Rise of the Guardians (PG) Thu 11:45, 2:15,

4:50, 7:20; Fri-Tue 11:45, 2:15, 4:50, 7:15 Skyfall (PG-13) Thu 11:20, 12:55, 2:35, 4:10, 5:50, 7:25, 9:05; Fri-Tue 12:55, 4:10, 6, 7:25, 9:40, 10:40 Smashed (R) ends Thu 12:50, 3:05, 5:20, 7:35 The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 (PG-13) Thu 11:30, 1:20, 2:20, 4:10, 5:10, 7, 8, 9:50; Fri-Sun 10:30, 1:20, 4:05, 6:55, 9:45; Mon-Tue 1:20, 4:05, 6:55, 9:45 Wreck-It Ralph (PG) Thu 11:25, 2:05, 4:55, 7:30; Fri-Tue 11:25, 2:05, 4:55, 7:30, 10:05

Century Gateway 12 770 N. Kolb Road.

800-326-3264, ext. 962.

Alex Cross (PG-13) Thu 12:20, 2:50, 5:15, 7:50; Fri-Sat 12:20, 2:50, 5:20, 7:50, 10:15; SunMon 12:20, 2:50, 5:20, 7:50; Tue 12:20, 2:50, 5:20, 7:50, 10:15; Wed 12:20, 2:50, 5:20, 7:50 Cloud Atlas (R) Thu-Wed 11:55, 3:30, 7:05 The Dark Knight Rises (PG-13) Thu-Wed 12:10, 3:35, 7 End of Watch (R) ends Thu 12, 5:05 Finding Nemo 3D (G) Thu 12, 2:30, 5; Fri-Sat 12, 2:30, 5, 7:30, 10; Sun-Mon 12, 2:30, 5, 7:30; Tue 12, 2:30, 5, 7:30, 10; Wed 12, 2:30, 5, 7:30 Frankenweenie (PG) Thu 12:35, 2:55, 7:30; FriWed 12:35, 2:55, 7:25 Frankenweenie 3D (PG) Thu 5:20; Fri-Sat 5:15, 9:45; Sun-Mon 5:15; Tue 5:15, 9:45; Wed 5:15 Ice Age: Continental Drift (PG) Thu 12:25, 2:45, 5, 7:15; Fri-Sat 12:25, 2:45, 5, 7:15, 9:35; Sun-Mon 12:25, 2:45, 5, 7:15; Tue 12:25, 2:45, 5, 7:15, 9:35; Wed 12:25, 2:45, 5, 7:15 Looper (R) Thu 12:40, 3:55, 7:20; Fri-Sat 12:40, 3:55, 7:10, 9:50; Sun-Mon 12:40, 3:55, 7:10; Tue 12:40, 3:55, 7:10, 9:50; Wed 12:40, 3:55, 7:10 The Man With the Iron Fists (R) ends Thu 12:50, 7:55 Paranormal Activity 4 (R) Fri-Sat 12:50, 3, 5:25, 7:45, 9:55; Sun-Mon 12:50, 3, 5:25, 7:45; Tue 12:50, 3, 5:25, 7:45, 9:55; Wed 12:50, 3, 5:25, 7:45 Pitch Perfect (PG-13) Thu 12:45, 3:20, 7:10; Fri-Sat 12:45, 3:45, 6:45, 9:30; Sun-Mon 12:45, 3:45, 6:45; Tue 12:45, 3:45, 6:45, 9:30; Wed 12:45, 3:45, 6:45 Seven Psychopaths (R) Thu 12:05, 2:35, 5:10, 7:40; Fri-Sat 12:05, 2:35, 5:05, 7:35, 10:05; Sun-Mon 12:05, 2:35, 5:05, 7:35; Tue 12:05, 2:35, 5:05, 7:35, 10:05; Wed 12:05, 2:35, 5:05, 7:35 Sinister (R) Thu 7:45; FriSat 12, 2:30, 5:10, 7:40, 10:10; Sun-Mon 12, 2:30, 5:10, 7:40; Tue 12,

2:30, 5:10, 7:40, 10:10; Wed 12, 2:30, 5:10, 7:40 Taken 2 (PG-13) Thu 12:15, 2:40, 3:45, 4:55, 7:25; Fri-Sat 12:15, 2:40, 4:55, 7:20, 9:40; Sun-Mon 12:15, 2:40, 4:55, 7:20; Tue 12:15, 2:40, 4:55, 7:20, 9:40; Wed 12:15, 2:40, 4:55, 7:20 Trouble With the Curve (PG-13) ends Thu 2:30, 7:35

Century Park Place 20 5870 E. Broadway Blvd.

800-326-3264, ext. 903.

Call for Wed film times Argo (R) Thu 1:05, 4:05; Fri-Tue 7:35, 10:25 The Collection (R) Thu 11, 1:15, 3:30, 5:45; FriTue 8:45 Flight (R) Thu 12:15, 3:25, 6:45, 10:05; FriTue 10, 1:20, 4:45, 8 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m., 12:10; Fri-Wed 10, 11:30, 1:50, 3:20, 4:05, 5:40, 7:10, 9:30 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey 3D (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m., 12:05; Fri-Wed 10:45, 12:15, 1, 2:35, 4:50, 6:25, 7:55, 8:40, 10:15 It’s a Wonderful Life (PG) Wed 2, 7 Killing Them Softly (R) Thu 11:55, 2:25, 4:55, 7:35, 10:10; Fri-Tue 11:35, 2:05, 4:35, 7:15, 9:50 Life of Pi (PG) Thu 12, 3:10, 6:20, 9:30; Fri-Tue 10:05, 1:15, 4:25, 7:25, 10:30 Life of Pi 3D (PG) Thu 11, 1, 2:10, 4:10, 5:20, 7:20; Fri-Tue 11:40, 2:50, 6, 9:10 Lincoln (PG-13) Thu 12:20, 3:40, 7, 10:20; Fri-Tue 12, 3:25, 6:50, 10:10 The Metropolitan Opera: Aida Live (Not Rated) Sat 10:55 The Metropolitan Opera: La Clemenza Di Tito Encore (Not Rated) Wed 6:30 Monsters, Inc. 3D (G) Wed 10:05, 12:30, 3, 5:30, 8, 10:25 Playing for Keeps (PG13) Fri-Tue 11:05, 1:55, 4:35, 7:30, 10:25 Red Dawn (PG-13) Thu 11:25, 12:25, 2, 2:55, 4:25, 5:30, 6:55, 7:55, 9:20, 10:25; Fri-Tue 11:50, 2:15, 4:40, 7:15, 9:45 Rise of the Guardians (PG) Fri-Tue 11, 12:05, 1:30, 2:35, 4, 5:05, 6:30, 9 Skyfall (PG-13) Thu 11:10, 12:45, 2:30, 4:05, 5:55, 7:25, 9:15; Fri-Tue 10:35, 12:20, 1:55, 3:40, 5:15, 7, 8:35, 10:20 The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 (PG-13) Thu 11:30, 12:10, 1:30, 2:20, 3, 4:20, 5:10, 5:50, 7:10, 8, 8:40, 10; Fri-Tue 10:15, 11:45, 1:10, 2:40, 4:10, 5:35, 7:05, 8:30, 10 Wreck-It Ralph (PG) Thu 11:45, 1:10, 2:35, 4, 5:25, 6:50, 8:15, 9:40; Fri 10:50, 12:10, 1:40,

3, 4:30, 5:50, 7:20, 10:15; Sat 10:50, 1:40, 4:30, 5:50, 7:20, 10:15; Sun-Tue 10:50, 12:10, 1:40, 3, 4:30, 5:50, 7:20, 10:15

Century Theatres at the Oro Valley Marketplace 12155 N. Oracle Road.

800-326-3264, ext. 899.

Call for Wed film times Anna Karenina (R) Thu 10:25, 1:25, 4:30, 7:30, 10:25; Fri-Tue 10:30, 1:30, 4:35, 7:35, 10:30 End of Watch (R) ends Thu 11:30, 2:15, 5:05, 7:45, 10:30 Flight (R) Thu 7:15, 10:25; Fri-Tue 10:25 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Tue 10:30, 1, 2:15, 6, 8:30, 9:45; Wed 10:30, 2:15, 6, 9:45 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey 3D (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Tue 11:45, 3:30, 4:45, 7:15; Wed 11:45, 3:30, 7:15 It’s a Wonderful Life (PG) Wed 2, 7 Killing Them Softly (R) Thu 11:50, 2:25, 5, 7:35, 10:05; Fri 11:50, 2:20, 5, 7:30, 10:05; Sat 7:30, 10:05; Sun-Tue 11:50, 2:20, 5, 7:30, 10:05 Life of Pi (PG) Thu-Tue 1:35, 7:25 Life of Pi 3D (PG) Thu 10:35, 4:30, 10:30; FriTue 10:35, 4:30, 10:20 Lincoln (PG-13) Thu 12:05, 3:30, 6:50, 10:15; Fri-Tue 12:05, 3:25, 6:50, 10:15 The Metropolitan Opera: Aida Live (Not Rated) Sat 10:55, 10:55 The Metropolitan Opera: La Clemenza Di Tito Encore (Not Rated) Wed 6:30, 6:30 Monsters, Inc. 3D (G) Wed 11:20, 1:50, 4:20, 6:50, 9:20 Playing for Keeps (PG13) Thu 11:15, 1:50, 4:25, 7:05, 9:45; Fri-Tue 11:15, 1:50, 4:25, 7:05, 9:40 Red Dawn (PG-13) ends Thu 11:45, 2:20, 4:55, 7:20 Rise of the Guardians (PG) Thu-Tue 11:10, 1:45, 4:15, 6:55, 9:25 Skyfall (PG-13) Thu-Tue 12:20, 3:40, 7, 10:10 Smashed (R) ends Thu 10:45, 1, 3:15, 5:30, 7:50, 10 The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 (PG-13) Thu 10:30, 1:20, 4:20, 7:10, 10:20; Fri 10:40, 1:25, 4:20, 7:10, 10; Sat 7:10, 10; SunTue 10:40, 1:25, 4:20, 7:10, 10 Wreck-It Ralph (PG) Thu 11:05, 1:55, 4:40; FriTue 11:05, 1:55, 4:40, 7:20

Crossroads 6 Grand Cinemas 4811 E. Grant Road.

327-7067.

Arbitrage (R) Thu 12:10, 5; Sat-Wed 11:40

Cloud Atlas (R) Thu 11:30, 3, 6:40; Sat-Wed 11:30, 3, 6:40 End of Watch (R) Thu 4:20; Sat-Wed 4:50 Frankenweenie (PG) Thu 11:10, 1:10; Sat-Wed 11:20, 1:20, 3:30 Looper (R) Thu 4:30, 9:15; Sat-Tue 9:50 The Man With the Iron Fists (R) Thu 3:20, 5:30, 7:40, 9:55; Sat-Tue 10:05 Paranormal Activity 4 (R) Sat-Tue 5:30, 7:40, 9:55; Wed 5:30, 7:40 Pitch Perfect (PG-13) Thu 11:20, 1:50, 7, 9:30; Sat-Tue 2:10, 4:40, 7:10, 9:40; Wed 2:10, 4:40, 7:10 La Rondine (San Francisco Opera) (Not Rated) Wed 7 A Royal Affair (R) SatTue 11:10, 2, 7; Wed 11:10, 2 Searching for Sugar Man (PG-13) Thu 12:20, 2:20, 7:10; Sat-Wed 12:20, 5, 7:20 Seven Psychopaths (R) Thu 2:30, 7:20, 9:50; Sat-Tue 2:20, 9:30; Wed 2:20 Sinister (R) ends Thu 10:05 Taken 2 (PG-13) Thu 11, 1, 3:10, 5:20, 7:30, 9:45; Sat-Tue 11, 1, 3:10, 5:20, 7:30, 9:45; Wed 11, 1, 3:10, 5:20, 7:30

Fox Tucson Theatre 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515.

The Polar Express (G) Sat 2, 8

Gallagher Theater UA Student Union, 1303 E. University Blvd.

626-0370.

Call for films and times

Harkins Tucson Spectrum 18 5455 S. Calle Santa Cruz.

806-4275.

Call for Wed film times Argo (R) ends Thu 12:50, 6:45 A Christmas Story (PG) Sat 10 The Collection (R) Thu 12:30, 2:45, 5:40, 8:05; Fri-Tue 11:10, 1:40, 3:55, 6:10, 9 End of Watch (R) ends Thu 3:50, 9:55 Flight (R) Thu 11:10, 2:15, 6:15; Fri-Tue 12, 3:10, 6:30, 9:40 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (PG13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; FriTue 9:15, 11:30, 1, 3:15, 4:45, 7, 8:30, 10:45 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey 3D (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Sat 10:45, 12:15, 2:30, 4, 6:15, 7:45, 10, 11:30; Sun-Tue 10:45, 12:15, 2:30, 4, 6:15, 7:45, 10 Killing Them Softly (R) Thu 11:45, 2:30, 5:10, 7:50; Fri-Sat 9:25, 11:50, 2:45, 5:20, 8:10, 11; Sun-Tue 9:25, 11:50, 2:45, 5:20, 8:10, 10:35 Life of Pi (PG) Thu 1:10, 4:10, 7:20, 10:25; Fri-

Tue 12:45, 7:15 Life of Pi 3D (PG) Thu 12:10, 3:10, 6:20; FriTue 9:50, 3:40, 10:15 Lincoln (PG-13) Thu 11:40, 3:20, 6:50, 10:10; Fri-Sat 9:10, 12:30, 3:50, 7:10, 10:40; Sun-Tue 9:10, 12:30, 3:50, 7:10, 10:30 The Nutcracker (PG) Tue 7 Playing for Keeps (PG-13) Thu 11, 1:50, 4:40, 7:30, 10:20; Fri-Tue 10:15, 1:05, 3:45, 6:40, 9:20 Rise of the Guardians (PG) Thu 11:05, 12:40, 1:40, 3:30, 4:30, 6:10, 7:10, 8:50, 9:50; Fri-Sat 10:10, 10:50, 12:50, 1:30, 3:30, 4:10, 6:05, 6:50, 8:40, 9:30, 11:20; Sun-Mon 10:10, 10:50, 12:50, 1:30, 3:30, 4:10, 6:05, 6:50, 8:40, 9:30; Tue 10:10, 10:50, 12:50, 1:30, 3:30, 4:10, 6:05, 8:40, 9:30 Rise of the Guardians 3D (PG) Thu 11:50, 2:40, 5:30, 8:10; Fri-Sat 11:40, 2:20, 5, 7:40, 10:20; Sun-Tue 11:40, 2:20, 5, 7:40, 10:05 Skyfall (PG-13) Thu 11:20, 2:50, 6:30, 9:40; Fri-Sat 9:20, 12:40, 4:15, 7:30, 10:50; SunTue 9:20, 12:40, 4:15, 7:30, 10:40 The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 (PG-13) Thu 11:15, 12, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6:05, 7, 8, 9; Fri-Tue 9:30, 10:20, 12:20, 1:20, 3:20, 4:20, 6:20, 7:20, 9:10, 10:10 Wreck-It Ralph (PG) Thu 1:15, 4:15, 7:15, 10:15; Fri 11:20, 2:10, 5:10, 7:50, 10:25; Sat 2:10, 5:10, 7:50, 10:25; SunTue 11:20, 2:10, 5:10, 7:50, 10:25 Wreck-It Ralph 3D (PG) ends Thu 12:15, 3:15

The Perks of Being a Wallflower (PG-13) Thu 5:20, 10; Fri-Wed 4:40 The Rocky Horror Picture Show (Not Rated) Sat 12 A Royal Affair (R) Thu 4 The Sessions (R) Thu 1, 3:15, 7:45; Fri 2:30, 7; Sat-Sun 2:30; Mon-Wed 12, 2:30 Universal Soldier: Day of Reckoning (R) Fri-Sat 9:30; Sun 7; Mon-Wed 9:30 The Very Merry Holiday Sing-Along (Not Rated) Sat 7

Oracle View 4690 N. Oracle Road.

292-2430.

Call for Fri-Wed times Alex Cross (PG-13) Thu 11:45, 2, 7:30, 9:50 The Bourne Legacy (PG13) Thu 4:30 Brave (PG) Thu 12:45 The Dark Knight Rises (PG-13) Thu 7:50 Hope Springs (PG-13) Thu 2:30 House at the End of the Street (PG-13) Thu 9:50 The Intouchables (R) Thu 12, 4:50, 7:20 Lay the Favourite (R) Thu 12:15, 2:40, 4:50, 7, 9:20 Looper (R) Thu 12:30, 3:30, 6:50, 9:30 The Odd Life of Timothy Green (PG) Thu 11:50 ParaNorman (PG) Thu 3:10, 5:25 Seven Psychopaths (R) Thu 2:10, 4:40, 7:10, 9:40

The Screening Room 127 E. Congress St. 882-0204.

Call for films and times

The Loft Cinema

Tower Theatres at Arizona Pavilions

3233 E. Speedway Blvd.

795-7777.

Call 795-0844 to check handicap accessibility Arizona vs. Nevada Gildan New Mexico Bowl (Not Rated) Sat 11 a.m.

The Bay (R) Fri-Sat 10:15; Sun 7:45; MonWed 10:15 Chasing Ice (PG-13) Fri 12:30, 3:15, 5:30, 7:30; Sat 12:30, 5:30, 7:30; Sun 3:15, 5:30, 7:30; Mon-Wed 12:30, 3:15, 5:30, 7:30 The Circus (G) Thu 7 The Comedy (Not Rated) Thu 9:45 Everything Is Terrible Holiday Special 2012 (Not Rated) Tue 7:30 The Fairy (Not Rated) Wed 7:30 Giselle in 3D (Not Rated) Sun 12 Godzilla vs. Megalon (G) Mon 8 Holy Motors (Not Rated) Thu 1:30, 10:15; Fri-Wed 5:15 Jurassic Park (PG-13) Fri-Sat 12, 10; Sun 12; Mon-Wed 10 A Late Quartet (R) Thu 12, 2:30, 7:30; Fri 12, 2:45, 7:45; Sat 2:45, 7:45; Sun 12:15, 2:45; Mon-Wed 12, 2:45, 7:45 Middle of Nowhere (R) Thu 5

8031 N. Business Park Drive. 579-0500.

Call for Fri-Wed film times Anna Karenina (R) Thu 11, 1:45, 4:25, 7:05, 9:50 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (PG13) Fri 12:01 a.m.

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey 3D (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.

Killing Them Softly (R) Thu 11:15, 1:25, 3:35, 5:45, 7:55, 10:05 Life of Pi (PG) Thu 11:50, 8:40 Life of Pi 3D (PG) Thu 1, 3:50, 6:40, 9:30 Lincoln (PG-13) Thu 12, 3:15, 6:30, 9:40 Playing for Keeps (PG-13) Thu 11:40, 2:10, 4:35, 7, 9:35 Red Dawn (PG-13) Thu 11:05, 1:10, 3:20, 5:30, 7:40, 9:55 Rise of the Guardians (PG) Thu 11:20, 12:30, 1:40, 4, 5:10, 6:20, 7:30, 8:45, 9:50 Rise of the Guardians 3D (PG) Thu 2:50 Skyfall (PG-13) Thu 12:45, 3:45, 6:45, 9:45 The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 (PG-13) Thu 11:30, 2:05, 3:25, 4:40, 6, 7:20, 10 Wreck-It Ralph (PG) Thu 11:10, 1:50, 4:30, 6:55, 9:20

DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

43

FILM CLIPS Reviews by Jacquie Allen, Colin Boyd and Bob Grimm.

NEWLY REVIEWED: THE BAY

Once-acclaimed director Barry Levinson, maker of such films as Rain Man and The Natural, succumbs to the found-footage craze with this middling movie.

Granted, it’s better than most of the found-footage horror films I’ve had to endure, but it’s still not good.

It’s Fourth of July, and a killer disease suddenly besieges a coastal town, with a plucky reporter (Kether Donohue) on hand to share all of the details.

The movie shows her after the disaster, reminiscing about what happened, with the “found footage” unspooling as she tells the story. There’s a lot of gore, and a couple of decent scares. But we have seen this all before, and Levinson doesn’t necessarily do anything to move this weak genre forward. Grimm CHASING ICE

Let’s suppose that, for you, 2012 didn’t happen.

There was no Hurricane Sandy; the first half of the year was not the hottest on record in U.S. history; there weren’t 15,000 record highs in March alone.

Let’s suppose that, for you, climate change or global warming is still a hoax. OK, then: Watch Chasing Ice. For the past half-decade, photographer James Balog has chronicled the receding of glaciers around the world, one picture per hour. To him, glaciers are the canaries in the coal mine of the global-warming debate. We’re not talking a couple of feet every month or year—the Columbia glacier in Alaska retreated more than 2 miles in three years. A chunk of Greenland ice the size of lower Manhattan broke off and submerged in a matter of minutes with Balog’s video cameras running. Sadly, this is all real—whether everyone believes it or not. Boyd SMASHED

Mary Elizabeth Winstead and Aaron Paul are phenomenal as two people who really love each other, and really love their booze. When Winstead’s teacher starts throwing up in front of her young students and smoking crack on a whim, she starts to get the idea that maybe she should slow down. Husband Paul is supportive, but he’s not about to quit boozing with his friends. The consequences of drinking to excess

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are portrayed in a way that seems realistic, and even a little funny. The film seems to make the case that some of the results of getting plowed on the weekends are as funny as they are stupid. Winstead is powerful and raw as a woman who knows it’s time to stop partying, even if the spouse won’t join her. Paul shows that his great acting isn’t reserved for Breaking Bad. The way things stand right now, both leads deserve berths in this year’s Oscar race. Grimm

UNIVERSAL SOLDIER DAY OF RECKONING

EXCLUSIVE ENGAGEMENT TUCSON Loft Cinema

STARTS FRIDAY, DECEMBER 14

(520) 795-7777 WWW.UNIVERSALSOLDIERDAYOFRECKONING.COM 44 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

‘Hitchcock’ is an enjoyable but surprisingly lightweight bit of cinema

UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: DAY OF RECKONING

I don’t know if I have ever seen any of the previous Universal Soldier films. I think I may’ve seen the first one. And now, I have seen the latest one, which I say with much regret. This thing is an incomprehensible mess about some sort of mind-controlled super-soldiers killing each other off. The film claims Jean-Claude Van Damme and Dolph Lundgren as its stars, but they hardly register, with Lundgren especially short on screen time. Scott Adkins is the real star, and I’ll be damned if I could tell you what in the hell is going on with his character. John Hyams directs this garbage with a sullen, depressing eye, giving you absolutely nobody for whom to root. Van Damme sleepwalks through his scenes, and Lundgren mugs through his few moments. There’s nothing to see here … move along. Grimm

CONTINUING: HOLY MOTORS

If you’ve been waiting for a film to come along in which the main character licks another woman’s blood onto Eva Mendes’ armpit, and then carries her into the sewer and eats her hair, you’re in luck!

(They also throw in a marching accordion chorus for free.) The movie is Holy Motors, safely one of 2012’s most unique experiences. Director Leos Carax spent years developing the story—a one-day journey through the life of Monsieur Oscar (Denis Lavant), who shuttles from one appointment to the next in his stretch limousine. He’s an old female beggar, a highpriced assassin, a motion-capture model for a visual artist, some kind of leprechaun who kidnaps a model (that’s where Eva Mendes comes in) and a worried father. It’s a strange way of pointing out that we all wear different masks in our lives, but it’s an arresting, daring film all the same. Boyd KILLING THEM SOFTLY

Brad Pitt stars as Jackie, a shady type brought in to clean up a mess after an organized-crime card game is robbed. His solution is to kill some people and get the game back on track—and he does it in a way that is both scary and fascinating. Directed by Andrew Dominik, who also directed Pitt in The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford, this is a good-looking movie that takes its sweet time. It’s also ultra-violent, with Ray Liotta enduring a screen beating unlike anything you have seen before. James Gandolfini shows up as a grouchy hit man who reminds of a washed-up Tony Soprano after the wife and kids have left. Pitt is just a bona fide movie star here, commanding all of his screen moments with seemingly effortless authority.

It’s a great movie to look at, but it isn’t for everybody. Grimm A LATE QUARTET

In A Late Quartet, Christopher Walken gives one of his best “normal” performances in years. He plays a cellist retiring from the quartet he founded, which sends the rest of its members into a cyclone of jealousy, greed and infidelity. Robert (Philip Seymour Hoffman) has languished as second violin for 25 years, and thinks the new alignment ought to allow him a bigger spotlight. His wife, Juliette (Catherine Keener), plays viola in the quartet and disagrees with him. Then there’s Daniel (Mark Ivanir), the perfectionist of the group, first violin and paramour of Robert and Juliette’s daughter. Although director Yaron Zilberman deserves kudos for the way he approaches this unique world of performance, the heavy-handed, clichéd personal issues the musicians face drag down a promising film. Boyd LIFE OF PI

UNDER THEIR OWN COMMAND

CINEMA

This is an amazing achievement in filmmaking. It’s one of the year’s best movies, and easily one of the best uses of the 3-D medium. Director Ang Lee is a creative force who cannot be deterred or stopped, and Life of Pi is his most splendorous and enchanting film to date—and he’s the guy who gave us Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. Suraj Sharma plays Pi, a young man who winds up on a lifeboat with a tiger after a storm sinks a ship carrying his family and its zoo animals. Pi must learn to appease the tiger; the tiger must accept or eat him—and that’s the plot of the movie. The story is told in flashback with an older Pi (Irrfan Khan) being interviewed by a writer (Rafe Spall). This is a great screen adventure full of countless magical moments and a sure contender for Best Picture. Grimm

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE

The Director

BY BOB GRIMM, bgrimm@tucsonweekly.com lthough it is being pushed as heady Oscar fare, Hitchcock is a little too bizarre and too goofy to find itself seriously in the running for Best Picture. I’m not complaining; I am a fan of bizarre, goofy movies, and I like this one. I just don’t think it’s going to take home a bagful of awards.

As this film explores the making of Psycho—Alfred Hitchcock’s biggest risk as a filmmaker—Hitchcock takes a few enjoyable diversions. It contains a blast of a performance from Anthony Hopkins as Hitch, with Helen Mirren perhaps outpacing him as Hitchcock’s wife, Alma Reville. The film has a surface sheen to it, seemingly placing more of an emphasis on Alma’s possible love affair with a fellow writer (Danny Huston) than on the making of Psycho.

Still, when it’s dealing with Psycho and the mechanics of making a movie, Hitchcock is a lot of fun. Hitch and Alma must mortgage their house to finance Psycho themselves when studios pass on the project. That really happened.

Sacha Gervasi (the documentary Anvil: The Story of Anvil) directs from a script by John J. McLaughlin (which, in turn, is based on Stephen Rebello’s book Alfred Hitchcock and the Making of Psycho). McLaughlin takes on some factual angles, such as Hitchcock’s running problems with Vera Miles (an excellent Jessica Biel) and his struggles with his weight.

Then there are the slightly oft-kilter embellishments, like Hitchcock’s imagined discussions with real-life serial killer Ed Gein (a perfectly cast Michael Wincott), on whom the book Psycho was loosely based. Seeing Hitchcock and Gein in the frame together having a conversation is welcomingly bizarre.

Had the two ever spoken, I imagine it could’ve gone the way it does in this film.

Scarlett Johansson captures the allure and sweetness of Janet Leigh, who withstood the torturous shower scene and was back to smiling shortly thereafter. It’s no secret that Hitchcock had troubles with his leading ladies. (HBO’s recent The Girl chronicles this fact with Tippi Hedren.) Johansson’s Leigh treats the job like nothing but a job, and shares little beyond gratitude and candy corn with her boss.

Hopkins—wearing a decent-looking fat suit and makeup, and employing just enough of Hitchcock’s nasally voice—delivers work that captures enough of Hitch’s characteristics without being a full-blown impersonation.

His Hitchcock is obsessive, funny and sometimes a little sad and lonely. Hopkins does a

A

Anthony Hopkins in Hitchcock.

Hitchcock Rated PG-13 Starring Anthony Hopkins, Helen Mirren and Scarlett Johansson Directed by Sacha Gervasi Fox Searchlight, 98 minutes Now playing at Century El Con 20 (800-326-3264, ext. 902)

remarkable job of delivering myriad Hitchcock moods without really changing the expression on his face.

Mirren brings a nice, dry wit to Alma, who reportedly helped rewrite and direct Hitchcock movies without screen credit. When Alma and Hitch risk it all to make a slasher movie nobody seems to want, Mirren delights in portraying the rush Alma must’ve felt when throwing all caution to the wind.

James D’Arcy provides a convincing Anthony Perkins, who, of course, played Norman Bates.

D’Arcy gets Perkins’ mannerisms just right, to an extent that I wish there were more of him in the film. According to the Internet Movie Database, Andrew Garfield had been considered, but couldn’t take the role due to scheduling conflicts. That would’ve been interesting.

This isn’t a flattering picture of one of cinema’s most influential and masterful directors. It isn’t a smear job, either. He’s seen as a relatively insecure man who maintains his sense of humor while obsessing over blonde female leads and occasionally stuffing his face to get back at the wife. Some of that is probably stretching the truth. Did Hitchcock hallucinate about Ed Gein while filming Psycho? Did he peer at his female stars through a hole in the wall, as does Norman Bates in Psycho? Did he need to hide his winedrinking and snacking from his domineering wife? I don’t know. I do know that it makes for a moderately fun movie.

For such a hefty subject, Hitchcock is surprisingly lightweight. It is also undeniably enjoyable.

N O W S H O W I N G AT H O M E Ted (Blu-ray)

Brazil (Blu-ray)

UNIVERSAL MOVIE B+ SPECIAL FEATURES B+ BLU-RAY GEEK FACTOR 8 (OUT OF 10)

CRITERION MOVIE A SPECIAL FEATURES A BLU-RAY GEEK FACTOR 10 (OUT OF 10)

Seth At long last, MacFarlane’s Criterion has featurereleased a directing Blu-ray verdebut is easily sion of what one of the stands as one year’s funniof the best est films, and DVDs ever it contains a terrific technical released. Last year, Universal achievement in the CGI released a “movie-only” Blucharacter of Ted, the obscene ray of Terry Gilliam’s masterteddy bear. McFarlane voiced piece, with no special features. the character and, through This is a different story. motion capture, provided the No question: Gilliam is one gestures as well. of the most jinxed directors Mark Wahlberg, who in cinema. His Don Quixote should stick to comedies, film got nixed due to a star’s plays the straight man, John, health and storms. His last to Ted; Wahlberg is so good picture had star Heath Ledger at this sort of thing. die before filming was comMacFarlane complements him pleted. perfectly, saying and doing And then there is Brazil, things that would be quite legendary for the battle shocking coming out of a Gilliam had with Universal human. Coming out of a teddy head Sid Sheinberg, who bear, they are oddly forgivable. deemed the movie noncomYou can skip the theatrical mercial (he was right) and version and go straight for too dark (perhaps, but it the new unrated version, needed to be). It wasn’t until which contains some new the Los Angeles Film Critics gags that make the movie Association called the film better. John’s parents discuss- the best of the year back in ing Christmas Eve carnal ’85 that Brazil got something activity in a businesslike resembling a decent release. manner is a hoot.

I reviewed the Blu-ray last You have to give Mila year. It’s a story about a Kunis a lot of credit for keepstrange futuristic society ing a straight face opposite where things get crowded, these shenanigans. And God dirty and Orwellian. Gilliam bless her and Wahlberg for employed special effects that the scene in which she has to stand up today, and even got clean up the floor after a Robert De Niro to co-star hooker did a bad thing. with Jonathan Pryce.

Watching this movie I love this movie, but it again, I had even more of an does have its share of detracappreciation for Giovanni tors—including the people Ribisi’s stalker character, who who financed it. gets a little more background SPECIAL FEATURES: You get material in the unrated verthe Terry Gilliam commension. His dance number to a tary, which still stands as one Tiffany song might be some of the best commentaries ever of the year’s best moves. put to home video. He’s A sequel couldn’t come engaging; he’s funny; and if fast enough. you are a fan of this movie, he’s very educational. You also SPECIAL FEATURES: In addiget a 90-minute-plus docution to the unrated version, mentary on the battle over you get a commentary with Brazil, chronicling the proMacFarlane and Wahlberg, a duction problems and featurgag reel, and deleted and extended scenes. There are also ing interviews with Gilliam and Sid Sheinberg. Gilliam extensive behind-the-scenes reminisces about things like looks that reveal MacFarlane taking out a full-page ad in was on the set at all times, Variety to ask Sheinberg delivering his lines with the when the studio was going to actors for authenticity.

BY BOB GRIMM, bgrimm@tucsonweekly.com

release his movie. Happily, the “Love Conquers All” version of the film is included. This is Sheinberg’s strange cut, which severely reduced the film’s length and completely changed the tone. Rather than Gilliam’s bleak vision of the future, you get a moronic love story with a ridiculous happy ending. (This actually aired on television. I recall seeing it and being horrified.) You also get some production archives and a booklet.

FILM CLIPS

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 44

THE PERKS OF BEING A WALLFLOWER

Writer Stephen Chbosky makes an impressive feature-directing debut with this adaptation of his semiautobiographical novel about high school kids in the early ’90s. Logan Lerman plays Charlie, a shy freshman who eventually winds up hanging out with a fringe group of students including Patrick (Ezra Miller) and Sam (Emma Watson). The new friends help Charlie come out of his shell, and he ultimately realizes things about himself that need to be examined. Lerman is especially good as the film’s anchor, while Miller continues to exhibit the great talents he showed in We Need to Talk About Kevin. Watson gets to step away from Hermione, and she does so successfully, making Sam a complex, real kid. This is one of the better films about high school to come along in quite some time. Grimm THE SESSIONS

Like a lot of us, Mark O’Brien (John Hawkes) has trouble with the ladies. Unlike a lot of us, Mark survived severe polio that left him confined to a bed, a stretcher or his iron lung. But he still wants a woman’s touch. In the surprisingly funny The Sessions,

Mark finds Cheryl (Helen Hunt), a sex therapist who will help him through the obviously delicate arrangement. Based on a true story—including O’Brien’s own journalistic account of it—The Sessions avoids the common pitfalls of movies that feature the disabled, movies that are eyed more cynically during Oscar season because of the degree of difficulty found in many of the performances. Hawkes does enter the Best Actor discussion here, although his portrayal is not as pained and morose as you’d expect. Indeed, it’s Mark’s liveliness and good humor that makes Hawkes worthy of the talk. Boyd SKYFALL

This is my all-time-favorite Bond film. Daniel Craig had been my favorite Bond since Sean Connery, and with this fine entry, he has actually become my favorite Bond. Sam Mendes directs this installment with a depth and level of excitement I haven’t detected before in the series (although Casino Royale came close), and Javier Bardem, as a former British agent gone bonkers, is a Bond villain for the ages. Great action scenes, fun homages to the series and a nice supporting turn from Judi Dench as M make this a Bond film to be truly enjoyed. Skyfall also features Ralph Fiennes and a decent song from Adele. I don’t know how many Bonds Craig has left in him, but I hope it’s a lot. Grimm

Mystery Science Theater 3000: XXV SHOUT! FACTORY SHOW ASPECIAL FEATURES B DVD GEEK FACTOR 7.75 (OUT OF 10)

With this, you get four additional installments of the legendary MST3K. The awful offerings to the critical silhouettes this time out are Robot Holocaust and Operation Kid Brother with original host Joel Hodgson, and Kitten With a Whip and Revenge of the Creature with host Mike Nelson. As usual, the jeers from Joel, Mike and the robots make it all endurable.

The best episode here would be Robot Holocaust, a first-season winner in which Joel and the robots were really beginning to hit their stride. Nelson was a great host, but nobody could replace Joel. In fact, fans of Joel can still see him skewering movies over at CinematicTitanic.com. (You can also watch episodes of Cinematic Titanic on Hulu.

It’s his post-MST3K project, and it’s just as funny.)

SPECIAL FEATURES: Both Joel and Mike introduce their episodes. Joel’s intros are especially entertaining, as he reveals his frustrations with the first season, including the set not yet being complete. You also get Life After MST3K docs on some of the series stars.

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45

CHOW Tapas Fusion’s ambition is admirable, but that’s not enough to cover up a number of missteps

Small Plates, Surreal Service

NOSHING AROUND

BY RITA CONNELLY, rconnelly@tucsonweekly.com

BY JERRY MORGAN noshing@tucsonweekly.com

f there are two words in the modern-day culinary lexicon that are misused more than tapas and fusion, I don’t know what they are. Tapas, to me, refers to all those wonderful small plates found at Spanish—and only Spanish— restaurants. Everything else is an appetizer.

And fusion means the true blending of two or more cuisines into one dish. It’s not putting a Greek salad next to an enchilada.

So the name of this midtown restaurant is a bit disconcerting. Certainly, they could’ve come up with something more lyrical.

Tucked behind several popular restaurants, this venue is a little hard to spot. Add to that the fact that when we pulled into the parking lot, the darkened lighting inside made it seem like the restaurant was closed.

The menu here is quite ambitious, with choices from around the world (hence “World Food” in the name). But having so many choices can get in the way of tasteful and focused execution.

One side of the menu contains two sections: tapitas and tapas. The other side, literally listed as “Side Two,” is divided into flat breads, salads, soups, risotto and a couple of specials (drinks and desserts, too).

From the tapitas selection, we chose the piquillos rellenos ($9), the papita rellenos ($3, the happy hour price when ordering a cocktail; $6 otherwise), the tamales ($5) and hummus ($5). We also had a pisco sour ($6).

From the tapas offerings, we ordered pinchos ($16), tortillitas de gambas ($9) and the gambas al ajillo ($13 with bread; $16 with fettuccini). From Side Two, we opted for the pollo al spiedo ($8 for a quarter-chicken; $13 for half; $18 whole). The tapas portions were more like entrée-size dishes.

On our first visit we were served yucca fries as what could be called an amuse bouche. They were an interesting start, although a bit bland.

But the piquillos were wonderful. Three small, sweet red peppers had been stuffed with a smidgen of shrimp and a delicious goat cheese that was all melty and warm. I could’ve eaten a dozen of them. A spoonful of tapenade, which the server called chimmichuri sauce, decorated the plate. It, too, was quite good.

We weren’t so lucky with other plates, though. The mashed-potatoes dough of the papita rellenos was nicely done, but the filling of finely chopped beef, olives and onions had an odd flavor. And both the masa and the Peruvian pork filling of the tamales (there was actually only one) were dry. The hummus came

A Clubhouse for Yeti?

I

46 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

A new place with an odd name will open soon-ish in the space formerly occupied by the My Big Fat Greek Restaurant at 7265 N. La Cholla Blvd., near Foothills Mall. The Lodge Sasquatch Kitchen is the creation of chef Aaron May of May’s Counter Chicken and Waffles, 2945 E. Speedway Blvd. May is bringing more of his special love to Tucson with a riff on one of his booming establishments in Phoenix. The big question: Is it free range, organic Sasquatch?

JOIE HORWITZ

Now This Is a Garden I Can Work In

Piquillos rellenos with homemade salsa from Tapas Fusion World Food and Bar. in a teeny portion with teeny tomatoes on top. It was served with what was called crostini (which appeared to be store-bought teeny toasts) and orange slices. Missing was that pop of garlic and swirl of olive oil that make hummus so wonderful.

A word about the service: There needs to be some training here. One night, the server seemed on top of his game. He checked on us regularly. He could describe the dishes, and he asked if we wanted all our food at once or the tapitas first. But the rest of the service was almost surreal. One server didn’t know the names of menu items. On our first visit, we were served one tapita, then one tapa, then another tapita followed by another tapa. Why have separate menu sections if you’re going to serve food that way? Then there was the greeter/busser who handed us the menus as we walked in the door and didn’t bother to seat us. Restaurant owners often ignore these details, usually to the detriment of everyone involved.

The tapas sounded great on paper, but the real thing didn’t quite match the descriptions.

Our favorite was the tortillitas de gambas. They were crispy and light, but the promised shrimp was a bit lost among all the other ingredients.

The menu promised beef, shrimp, tilapia and scallops on the skewers of the pinchos. Although everything was nicely grilled and seasoned, there was only one shrimp, one piece of tilapia and one scallop. The fried-potato cubes served with it were a nice complement.

The gambas al ajillo is a dish that should sing with the flavors of garlic and butter, but the shrimp was bland. The fettuccini was in reality linguini, and it was overcooked.

Tapas Fusion World Food and Bar 2970 N. Campbell Ave. 577-7270; tapasfusiontucson.com Open Wednesday and Thursday, 4 to 9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday, 4 to 10 p.m.; Sunday, 3 to 9 p.m.

Pluses: Some of the plates are quite good, including the picarones Minuses: The service is wildly uneven; they should invest in a bartender

The skin on the pollo al spiedo was truly crispy and full of all manner of seasonings. But most of the breast (with the quarter, you have a choice of white or dark meat) skin was missing.

Who knows what happened to it? We opted for sweet potato fries ($1) instead of the regular fries.

They were enjoyable. There was also a duo of creamy sauces: a yellow pepper sauce and a cilantro sauce, both nicely presented and quite tasty.

The pisco sour fell short. But perhaps that was because although there is a bar, there is no bartender. The servers have to make the drinks.

For dessert, the picarones ($5) were heavenly.

They were described as butter-squash and sweet-potato beignets and were served with a house-made syrup. They were hot out of the fryer and light and airy. But as for the flavors of butter squash and sweet potato, well, they just weren’t there. The Napoleons, or mil hojas, ($5) had flaky layers of crisp dough. They were tasty, but could have used more of the caramel filling.

Tapas Fusion is one of those places I really wanted to like. But a lack of focus makes that hard to do.

Word is that Reilly Craft Pizza and Drink, 101 E. Pennington St., has permits approved for a rather large beer garden. The extension of the downtown restaurant will include an outdoor bar and seating area, and 40 beer taps. A walkin refrigerator for kegs will also be installed to keep all that beer at the optimal temperature.

It’s looking like the beer garden will open next fall. Check reillypizza.com for updates. (Full disclosure: I am currently employed at Reilly.)

Beans Every Which Way Native Seeds/SEARCH is teaming up with local restaurants to explore the many flavors, and uses, of beans. Free samples of bean dishes created by the likes of Downtown Kitchen + Cocktails, Feast, Rocco’s Little Chicago Pizzeria and The Garden Kitchen will be available starting at 11 a.m., Saturday, Dec. 15, at the Native Seeds/SEARCH retail store, 3061 N. Campbell Ave.

Café Poca Cosa Adding Patio While walking downtown recently, I passed a sweet-looking, metal-fenced patio area under construction. The space, at the corner of Scott Avenue and Pennington Street, belongs to Café Poca Cosa (www.cafepocacosatucson.com) and is shaping up nicely. Chef Suzana Davila said she expects it to be ready for al fresco dining early next year. She said that it still needs some electrical work, including the installation of some unique light fixtures, before she can open it to patrons.

CHOW SCAN

may be, everyone will find something to enjoy. Many of the items can be prepared gluten-free. The wine book is one of the best in town, and service seldom falters.

(2-24-11) $$-$$$

Chow Scan is the Weeklyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s selective guide to Tucson restaurants. Only restaurants that our reviewers recommend are included. Complete reviews are online at tucsonweekly.com. Chow Scan includes reviews from August 1999 to the present. Send comments and updates to: mailbag@tucsonweekly.com; fax to 792-2096; or mail to Tucson Weekly/Chow, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726. These listings have no connection with Weekly advertising.

FROGS ORGANIC BAKERY NW 7109 N. Oracle Road. 229-2124. Open Wednesday-Saturday 7:30 a.m.-4 p.m.; Sunday 7:30 a.m.-3 p.m. Counter/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Owned by French bakers, Frogs prepares food with no chemicals, preservatives, artificial colors or trans fats. Ingredients are fresh, organic and from area farms.

Menu offerings include moderately priced soup, sandwiches, salads, quiche and breakfast items. But you must visit to sample the terrific pastries. Choose from delectable fruit tarts, macarons, sticky buns, muffins and more. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t miss the almond croissants and the dessert of the day. (1-5-12) $-$$

KEY

GOURMET GIRLS GLUTEN-FREE BAKERY/BISTRO NW 5845 N. Oracle Road. 408-9000. Open Tuesday-

Sunday 7 a.m.-3 p.m. CafĂŠ/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This tiny bakery and bistro is a godsend for folks with gluten issues. In the bakery, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll find muffins, cupcakes, breads, pizza shells, bread crumbs, crostini, cakes, piesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;you name it. The bistro menu includes fresh salads, homemade soups, sandwiches and breakfast items.

Breakfast and lunch are served all day. (5-10-12) $$

PRICE RANGES $ $8 or less $ $ $8-$15 $ $ $ $15-$25 $ $ $ $ $25 and up.

Prices are based on menu entrĂŠe selections, and exclude alcoholic beverages.

FORMS OF PAYMENT V Visa MC Mastercard AMEX American Express DIS Discover DC Dinerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Club checks local checks with guarantee card and ID only debit debit cards CatCard University of Arizona CatCard.

TYPE OF SERVICE Counter Quick or fast-food service, usually includes take-out.

Diner Minimal table service.

CafĂŠ Your server is most likely working solo.

Bistro Professional servers, with assistants bussing tables.

Full Cover Multiple servers, with the table likely well set.

Full Bar Separate bar space for drinks before and after dinner.

RESTAURANT LOCATION C Central North to River Road, east to Alvernon Way, west to

Granada Avenue downtown, and south to 22nd Street.

NW Northwest North of River Road, west of Campbell

Avenue.

NE Northeast North of River Road, east of Campbell Avenue.

E East East of Alvernon Way, south of River Road.

S South South of 22nd Street.

W West West of Granada Avenue, south of River Road.

CAFES AND BISTROS FEAST C 3719 E. Speedway Blvd. 326-9363. Open TuesdaySunday 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Chef Doug Levy takes usual ingredients and creates unusual, innovative and delectable fare.

He changes the menu every month, which means two things: The menu is seasonally driven, and you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get too attached to any one itemâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;but whatever the month

JOELâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S BISTRO C 806 E. University Blvd. 529-7277. Open daily 8 a.m.-3 p.m.; Tuesday-Saturday 5-8 p.m. Summer hours: open daily 8 a.m.-3 p.m.; Thursday-Saturday 5-8 p.m.

Bistro/BYO. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Quiches, hot sandwiches, salads and a handful of regular entrĂŠes are all worth eating at Joelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bistro, but the star of the show is the crepes. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a beautiful thing to dine on sweet, succulent fruit crepes on a gorgeous day in the university area. (3-31-05) $-$$

$1 FOR 3 TAQUITOS! One coupon per order. Cannot be combined with other offers.

Expires12/29/2012.

1/13/13 Expires

MONTEREY COURT CAFĂ&#x2030; C 505 W. Miracle Mile. 207-2429. Open Tuesday 8 a.m.-8 p.m.; Wednesday-Saturday 8 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.-2 p.m. CafĂŠ/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. Monterey Court CafĂŠ is one big step in the right direction toward reclaiming the glitz and glamour of the 1930s and â&#x20AC;&#x2122;40s in the Miracle Mile neighborhood. Built as a motel in 1938, Monterey Court is now a collection of galleries and artisan shops. The cafĂŠ is a wonderful addition, serving fresh, delicious food and local brews at affordable prices. Service is warm and friendly.

Definitely try the guacamole. (9-20-12) $-$$ SEVEN CUPS C 2516 E. Sixth St. 881-4072. Open Monday-Saturday 10:30 a.m.-8 p.m.; Sunday 11:30 a.m.-6 p.m. CafĂŠ/ No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Tucson is lucky to have Seven Cups, a traditional Chinese teahouse that serves a variety of some of the best teas youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll find anywhere.

Order a pot of tea and a Japanese pastry, take in the calm elegance and forget that the outside world exists for an hour or two. (9-2-04) $-$$ SOMETHING SWEET DESSERT LOUNGE E 5319 E. Speedway Blvd. 881-7735. Open Monday and Tuesday 5 p.m.-midnight; Wednesday, Thursday and Sunday 11 a.m.-midnight; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-2 a.m. CafĂŠ/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Featuring dozens of desserts, late-night hours for the allages crowd, free wireless Internet and a book-exchange program, Something Sweet is carving out a new niche in Tucson. The colossal carrot cake is a wonder to behold.

(1-22-04) $ SONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S BAKERY CAFĂ&#x2030; E 5683 E. Speedway Blvd. 885-0806. Open Monday and Tuesday 11 a.m.-3 p.m.; Wednesday-Saturday 7 a.m.-3 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.-2 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol.

MC, V. Sonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is an absolute gem, featuring amazing sandwiches and salads, and wonderful homemade desserts and pastries. Son, the proprietor, makes all the breads and baked goods himself, and he is a master.

With the prices low and the service so welcoming and enthusiastic, Sonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is a delight in almost every way.

(4-8-04) $

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DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

47

CAFES AND BISTROS

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 47

SUNNY DAZE CAFÉ S 4980 S. Campbell Ave. 295-0300. Open SundayTuesday 6 a.m.-3 p.m.; Wednesday-Saturday 6 a.m.-8 p.m. Café/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Tasty, inexpensive food can be found in abundance at Sunny Daze—but what really sets this southside café apart is its clean, tropical-themed décor. The small, square room is decorated to the hilt, and definitely worth checking out. (11-6-08) $-$$

It’s like an online daily newspaper.

Except it doesn’t

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Visit The Range at daily.tucsonweekly.com

TOOLEY’S COFFEE SHOP C 299 S. Park Ave. No Phone. Open daily 8 a.m.-3 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. Cash only. Simple, honest food makes this café worthy of repeat visits. Breakfast is big, but the lunches are also quite satisfying. Coffee and teas are plentiful, and the vibe is kicked-back and cool. The décor is especially charming, with a patio that is ideal for alfresco dining. Be warned: Hours seem to change on a whim. It’s that laid-back. (3-26-09) $ WILKO C 943 E. University Blvd. 792-6684. Open MondaySaturday 8 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.-9 p.m. Bistro/ Full Bar. DIS, MC, V. This gastropub is a wonderful addition to the university area; in fact, it’s a plus for the entire city. Artisan cheeses and meats are a big part of the menu. The Sonoran hot dog becomes the Sonoran bratwurst, locally made and topped with guindilla relish.

Other entrées include delicious pasta and a wonderful tilapia. Desserts are top-notch, which is no surprise, since they’re made by the folks at The B Line. (8-1111) $$

CAJUN Serving Tucson Since 1982

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DON’S BAYOU CAJUN COOKIN’ NE 8991 E. Tanque Verde Road. 749-4410. Open Tuesday-Thursday 11 a.m.-8 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday 11 a.m.-7 p.m. Counter/BYO. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Craving some crawdads? Just gotta have a piece of pecan pie? We recommend heading over to Don’s. This teeny joint offers some of the Old Pueblo’s best Cajun cooking. This is truly down-home food, served simply, but with a lot of heart. (6-10-10) $$

THE PARISH NW 6453 N. Oracle Road. 797-1233. Open daily 11 a.m.-midnight. Bistro/Full Bar. MC, V. The Parish is a fine drinking establishment. Oh, and they serve food, too—really good food. The Southern-fusion gastropub features dishes with a Cajun/Creole twist, and the bold flavors are served with a smile. Consider yourself warned: When something is described as spicy, they mean it. (3-8-12) $$

CHINESE BA-DAR CHINESE RESTAURANT E 7321 E. Broadway Blvd. 296-8888. Open TuesdayThursday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 11:30 a.m.-9 p.m. Café/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. The range of flavors is not especially broad or intense, but with that caveat, the mix of Mandarin, Szechuan and Cantonese cuisine can be quite satisfying, with a particular variety of fish and seafood dishes. (10-30-08) $-$$ C. I. CHU’S MONGOLIAN BARBECUE E 4540 E. Broadway Blvd. 881-4798. Open daily 11

a.m.-9 p.m. Diner. Beer, Wine and Sake. MC, V. Also at 7039 E. Tanque Verde Road (886-8619). C.I. Chu’s does Mongolian barbecue right. While the do-it-(mostly)yourself experience can be a bit confusing for first-time diners, this is a place to go for a relatively fast, affordable, uncomplicated and tasty bit of Asian food. (8-1204) $-$$ CHINA BOY C 1800 E. Fort Lowell Road, No. 136A. 867-8470.

Open Monday-Saturday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday noon-8 p.m. Café/No Alcohol. DIS, MC, V. At this tiny midtown spot, the flavors are fresh and bright; the prices are reasonable; the portions are huge; and they pack up everything in those charming little white boxes. The family dinners offer a nice assortment of choices, and the lunch specials do, too. The Mongolian beef pops with flavor, and the orange chicken is a great version of this standby. The crystal shrimp could be addicting—and the restaurant delivers, too! (10-20-11) $-$$ CHINA PASTA HOUSE C 430 N. Park Ave. 623-3334. Open Monday-Friday

8 a.m.-9 p.m.; Saturday and Sunday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.

CHINA PHOENIX NW 7090 N. Oracle Road, Suite 172. 531-0658.

Open Monday-Friday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m.; Saturday and Sunday 10 a.m.-9:30 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. If you have a taste for dim sum on the weekend, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re in for a cultural treat. The procuring of dumplings from pushcarts is a noisy business, but if you are hard up for dim sum, it will get you by. Dim sum is served on Saturday and Sunday from 10 a.m.-3 p.m.

(10-17-02) $-$$ DRAGON VIEW W 400 N. Bonita Ave. 623-9855. Open Monday-

Thursday 11 a.m.-3 p.m. and 4-8:30 p.m.; Friday and Saturday noon-3 p.m. and 4-9:30 p.m.; Sunday noon3 p.m. and 4-8:30 p.m. Bistro/Beer and Wine. MC, V. Since original owner Harry Gee regained control of this secluded westside restaurant (itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s on a street that winds along the west side of the Santa Cruz between St. Maryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Road and Congress Street), the fare is once again some of the best Chinese food in town. The duck, for one thing, is excellent, and the greens are also terrific if you let the staff guide your choice. (4-2-09) $-$$ DRAGON VILLAGE RESTAURANT NW 12152 N. Rancho Vistoso Blvd., No. 180. 229-

0388. Open Monday-Friday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Saturday and Sunday noon-9 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. While not matching the level of Bay Area Chinese restaurants, the crowded Dragon Village is perfectly fine by Tucson standards, with remarkable walnut shrimp and a good way with broccoli. (4-10-08) $ GOLDEN PHOENIX C 2854 E. 22nd St. 327-8008. Open daily 11 a.m.-

9:30 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. MC, V. The food here is consistently as good as what youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d find in San Francisco or Hong Kong. Austere atmosphere, but when the kitchen is on, this place is it. $-$$ GREAT WALL CHINA S 2445 S. Craycroft Road. 514-8888. Open daily 11

a.m.-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. The service is quick and friendly; the dĂŠcor is clean and welcoming. And the food? Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s consistently tasty, although the vegetarian offerings could use a boost. The pan-fried noodles are worth checking out, as is the not-too-sweet sesame chicken. Great Wall deserves to be part of the conversation when discussing Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s top Chinese restaurants. (1-31-08) $$-$$$$ GUILIN CHINESE RESTAURANT C 3250 E. Speedway Blvd. 320-7768. Open Sunday

11:30 a.m.-9 p.m.; Monday-Thursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Saturday 11:30 a.m.-9:30 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Hold on to your hats! With this venue, Tucson can boast itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s home to honest-to-goodness Chinese food, full of the bright tastes and textures for which the cuisine is renowned everywhere but here in the Old Pueblo. Tons of vegetarian options and daily lunch specials make Guilin a must-stop. $-$$ HARVEST MOON NW 12125 N. Oracle Road, Suite D5. 825-5351.

Open Sunday-Thursday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m. CafĂŠ/Full Bar. AMEX, MC, V. Folks in Oro Valley can rejoice in the fact that theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got one of the best Chinese restaurants in the area right in their backyard. Wonderful starters include the crab puffs, foil-wrapped chicken and pot stickers. Canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t-miss entrĂŠes include the crispy duck and the scrumptious crispy shrimp with spicy salt. Soups are yummy, too!

(12-31-09) $$ IMPRESS HOT POT C 2610 N. First Ave. 882-3059. Open Monday-

Saturday 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m.; Sunday 1:30-10 p.m.

Bistro/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Impress Hot Pot is Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s first Chinese hot-pot restaurant, and this do-it-yourself place is definitely worth a stop. Authentic Chinese flavors abound; try one of the many unique dishes like jellyfish, chicken feet or preserved eggs.

Customize your own tasty hot pot with a plethora of ingredients and sauce optionsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and be sure to bring friends to share. (11-3-11) $$ P.F. CHANGâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S CHINA BISTRO

familiar with the menu, so by all means, take their advice. You wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be sorry. (8-3-00) $$ PANDA HOUSE STIR-FRY NW 3725 W. Ina Road. 744-6200. Open MondaySaturday 11 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 5-8 p.m. Counter/ Diner/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Featuring buildyour-own stir fry and all-you-can-eat lunch Monday through Friday for less than $8. $-$$ PANDA VILLAGE E 6546 E. Tanque Verde Road. 296-6159. Open

Monday-Thursday and Saturday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m.; Friday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday noon-9 p.m. Diner/ Beer and Wine. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve had some extraordinary dinners at this Chinese venue. The kuo tieh, flavorful pork-filled dumplings lightly seared, are served with sauce of perfect fragrance and bite. $$ PEKING PALACE E 6970 E. 22nd St. 750-9614. Open daily 11 a.m.-9 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Bright, fresh renditions of Chinese classics. The hot and sour soup, Peking duck and stir-fried shrimp and scallops are often worth the trip. $$-$$$

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IKEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S COFFEE AND TEA C 3400 E. Speedway Blvd. 323-7205. Open daily 6 a.m.-midnight. CafĂŠ/No Alcohol. MC, V. Also at 100 N. Stone Ave. (792-1800). Ikeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s does it right, with fresh ingredients in their salads and sandwiches, good coffee and a modern but mellow atmosphere. Try dessert, too; you wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be disappointed. (7-10-03) $ LE BUZZ CAFFE AND NEWS E 9121 E. Tanque Verde Road, Suite 125. 749-3903.

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Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. It may be more L.A. than Tucson, but thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no denying that this hip chain is one of Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most popular places to be seen and dine. Diners are rewarded with commendable fare and a chic, eclectic ambience. Servers are intimately

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BENTLEYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S HOUSE OF COFFEE AND TEA C 1730 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-0338. Open MondaySaturday 7 a.m.-6 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.-6 p.m. Summer hours: Monday-Saturday 7 a.m.-4 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.-4 p.m. CafĂŠ/Counter/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V, Checks. Delightful desserts, coffee you can get your hands around, and lip-smacking fresh salads and sandwiches make this standard a good choice. (4-19-01) $

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CafĂŠ/No Alcohol. MC, V. This small UA-area restaurant features the delicious cuisine of Dandong, China. Gruel, dumplings, buns and noodle dishes fill out the menu.

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SPARKROOT C 245 E. Congress St. 272-8949. Open Monday-Friday 7 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.-9 p.m. Counter/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Sparkroot is the only coffeehouse in the state that serves marvelous Blue Bottle Coffee. The granola is a great way to start your day, and the dark-chocolate plate is a great way to finish it. In between, there are pressed-cheese sandwiches, salads and other bites that satisfy. All of this is offered in a space with a chic, big-city feel. (12-29-11) $

DELI BISON WITCHES BAR AND DELI C 326 N. Fourth Ave. 740-1541. Open daily 11 a.m.midnight (bar open until 2 a.m.). CafĂŠ/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This college hangout earns its popularity with fresh sandwiches, tasty bread-bowl soups and enormous trays of nachos. A nice selection of beers and other alcohol add to the placeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s appeal. (3-10-05) $ FIFTH STREET DELI AND MARKET E 5071 E. Fifth St. 325-3354. Open Monday-Thursday 8 a.m.-7 p.m.; Friday and Sunday 8 a.m.-3 p.m.

Counter/No Alcohol. DIS, MC, V. This is exactly what a neighborhood market/deli should be: small, cozy and nothing fancy, with friendly service. The food is pretty good, too; the noodle kugel is a real winner, and the brisket is better than homemade. Corned beef comes in extra-lean and regular varieties, and the soups are popular. Whether you stop to get a meal to-go or dine in, this deli should be on your list of regular dining spots.

(12-25-08) $-$$ SHLOMO AND VITOâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S NEW YORK DELICATESSEN NW 2870 E. Skyline Drive. 529-3354. Open SundayThursday 8 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 8 a.m.-10 p.m. CafĂŠ/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Where do you go in the Sonoran Desert for smoked whitefish or matzo brei? Head on over to Shlomo and Vitoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, which is more of a restaurant than a true deli; thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a full dinner menu in addition to an assortment of deli offerings.

Desserts are made in-house. The portions are huge, and the patio offers views you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get in the Big Apple.

There are Italian faves as well, but stick to the Jewish side of the menu. (6-19-08) $-$$ TONYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S ITALIAN DELI E 6219 E. 22nd St. 747-0070. Open Monday-Saturday

9 a.m.-8 p.m. CafĂŠ/Counter/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. With the feel of New York Cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Little Italy, Tonyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is the place to go for cozy, welcoming food and warm hospitality. Whether itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the generous sandwiches, the pasta or the pizza that keeps you coming back, everyone in the family is sure to find something to please their individual tastes. If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re feeding a crowd at home, donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t forget to pick up one of Tonyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s buckets of spaghetti. $

EASTERN EUROPEAN AMBER RESTAURANT AND GALLERY NE 7000 E. Tanque Verde Road. 296-9759. Open Sunday-Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-1 p.m. CafĂŠ/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Amber offers just what this town needs: good, hardy Eastern European food in a thoroughly modern setting. Potato pancakes, kielbasa, goulash, schnitzel and other oldworld dishes are made from scratch and served with a smile. While the prices are a tad high, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be taking home a doggie bag or two to enjoy the next day. (8-2009) $$$-$$$$

LE RENDEZ-VOUS C 3844 E. Fort Lowell Road. 323-7373. Open TuesdayFriday 11:30 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-10 p.m.; Saturday and Sunday 5-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V, Checks. The deft touch of chef Jean-Claude Berger makes for a sumptuous lunch or dinner of simple dishes, like cabrilla in capers and lemon, done splendidly. $$-$$$

OPA! C 2990 N. Campbell Ave., No. 130. 327-2841. Open Monday-Thursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This Greek restaurant on the Campbell Avenue restaurant row offers a full slate of traditional Greek favorites in a hearty, homey atmosphere. Try the souvlaki or perhaps a spanakopita platter or the gyros wrap. Greek beer and wine are available. Raise your glasses and say OPA! (2-14-08) $$-$$$

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ATHENS ON FOURTH AVENUE C 500 N. Fourth Ave. 624-6886. Open MondaySaturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. CafĂŠ/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V, Checks. To sup with the gods, one needs to stroll no farther than up Fourth Avenue to Athens on Fourth. A small restaurant where Andreas Delfakis has quietly been serving the best authentic Greek cuisine in Tucson for years. (3-7-02) $-$$

CAFĂ&#x2030; DESTA C 758 S. Stone Ave. 370-7000. Open daily 11 a.m.-9 p.m. CafĂŠ/BYO. MC, V. CafĂŠ Desta is more than just a place to grab some grubâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a shared dining experience. With more-than-generous portion sizes and flavorful traditional Ethiopian dishes, the cafĂŠ is livening up the south-of-downtown scene, filling a small void in an area lacking restaurants. (5-12-11) $$

THE FAT GREEK E 3225 N. Swan Road, Suite 105. 784-7335. Open daily 11 a.m.-9 p.m. CafĂŠ/Counter/Beer and Wine.

AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This locally owned Tucson restaurant serves up great Greek food, fast, with a smile. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t miss one of Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tastiest gyros, but also consider trying one of the lesser-known specialties. Inexpensive and delicious. (11-5-09) $-$$

LANIâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S LUAU HAWAIIAN RESTAURANT E 2532 S. Harrison Road. 886-5828. Open TuesdayThursday 10:30 a.m.-8 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 10:30 a.m.-9 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. MC and V. Enjoy an authentic taste of Hawaii right here in Tucson.

Dishing up luau-style food (think lots of pork), the family-owned and -operated joint is a great place to cure that craving for laulau, kalua pork or chicken long rice.

With a fairly extensive menu and a significant nod to the Filipino influence in Hawaiian food, Laniâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is definitely worth the trip to the eastside (2-16-12) $-$$

ZEMAMâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S C 2731 E. Broadway Blvd. 323-9928. Open TuesdaySunday 11 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 4:30-9:30 p.m. CafĂŠ/ BYO. MC, V, Checks. For a quick transport to North Africa, try Zemamâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s and savor the complex and spicy regional fare. Served with the traditional bread called injera, the food at Zemamâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is a delightful excuse to eat with your hands, get sloppy and have good fun. (11-0200) $-$$

FRONIMOâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S GREEK CAFĂ&#x2030; C 3242 E. Speedway Blvd. 327-8321. Open daily 10 a.m.-9 p.m. Counter/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This unpretentious but attractive family-owned spot provides quick service of the Greek basics, plus burgers and gyros. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s very good Greek food at equally good prices. (2-28-08) $-$$

POLISH COTTAGE C 4520 E. Broadway Blvd. 891-1244. Open Tuesday-

Saturday 11 a.m.-8 p.m.; Sunday noon-7 p.m. CafĂŠ.

Beer, Wine and Specialty Drinks. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This tiny midtown spot is like a little slice of Poland. It offers your pierogi, your bigos, your kielbasa, your stuffed cabbage and your borschtâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;home-style food just like your babica made. The beer list is long, and, of course, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s vodka. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s stick-to-the-ribs stuff. (1-19-12) $

FRENCH AGUSTĂ?N BRASSERIE W 100 S. Avenida del Convento, No. 150. 398-5382.

Open Tuesday-Friday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Saturday 5-10 p.m.; Sunday 9 a.m.-3 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. MC, V. This French-themed bistro in the westside Mercado San AgustĂ­n sits in a space that exudes an elegant charm without crossing into pretentiousness. The menu is limited, but the fare is generally excellent. The vichyssoise and the risotto should not be missed. (8-9-12) $$-$$$ GHINIâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S FRENCH CAFFĂ&#x2030; C 1803 E. Prince Road. 326-9095. Open TuesdayThursday and Saturday 6:30 a.m.-3 p.m.; Friday 6:30 a.m.-8 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.-2 p.m. CafĂŠ/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V, Checks. Ghiniâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is a small marvel of culinary perfection. From the eggs cooked

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11 a.m.-3 p.m. and 5-10 p.m. CafĂŠ/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. Gandhi offers an expansive menu including a dozen curry dishes, a plethora of tandoori dishes, breads, biryanis (jambalaya-like stews) and other entrĂŠes. Vegetarians, take note: There are more than two dozen dishes offered that are sans-meat. And the buffet may be the best lunch deal in town. As one diner put it, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s like â&#x20AC;&#x153;a roller coaster in your mouth.â&#x20AC;? (8-28-03) $-$$ INDIA OVEN C 2727 N. Campbell Ave. 326-8635. Open daily 11

a.m.-2:45 p.m. and 5-10 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine.

AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This cozy little Campbell Avenue restaurant has long been a Tucson favorite for its large (more than 100-plus items) menu. The lunch buffet features a surprisingly good selection of tasty items, and the samosas are consistently fantastic. (4-27-06) $-$$

CONTINUED ON PAGE 52

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MY BIG FAT GREEK RESTAURANT E 7131 E. Broadway Blvd. 722-6000. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This Phoenix-based chain offers delicious food at extremely reasonable prices. The souvlaki is moist and marinated perfectly; the spanakopita is a spinach-and-feta delight.

CURRY LEAF C 2510 E. Grant Road, No. 100. 881-2786. Open Monday-Thursday 11 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 5-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 5-9:30 p.m. CafĂŠ/No Alcohol. DC, DIS, MC, V. Curry Leaf offers affordable lunch specials, as well as delicious dinner entrĂŠes. The food is fresh; the service is friendly; and the portion sizes are generous for the price. Be sure not to miss out on the soft, buttery garlic naan. (9-15-11) $$

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ITâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S GREEK TO ME NW 15920 N. Oracle Road. 825-4199. Open MondaySaturday 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Bistro/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. From luscious appetizers like the rich taramosalata, to savory entrĂŠes like the pastitsio and the lamb shank, and concluding with a heavenly honey cake or lovely baklava for dessert, the food at this Greek joint sings. These are the same people who run the wonderful Athens on Fourth Avenue, so you know the foodâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going to impress. The atmosphere is casual, and the service is sincere and friendly. If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re lucky, George, the chef and owner, will come out to share a glass of wine or a little insight on how he prepared your dinner. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s worth the drive to Catalina. (11-17-11) $$-$$$

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AMEX, MC, V, Checks. A pretty, warm, friendly neighborhood hangout with full espresso-bar offerings and a good bakery. Excellent service and a great locationâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the northeast corner of Tanque Verde Road and Catalina Highwayâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;make Le Buzz a local favorite. (9-12-02) $

The dĂŠcor reminds one of Applebeeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, and the serviceâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; while fastâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;may suffer from an occasional lapse or two.

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TuCsONWEEKLY

51

INDIAN

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 50

NEW DELHI PALACE E 6751 E. Broadway Blvd. 296-8585. Open daily 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 5-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. New Delhi Palace is a great eastside spot for a quick, inexpensive and tasty Indian lunch buffet—as long as you’re not looking for super-spicy fare. Dinner is served fast and with a smile, and the menu offers an extensive selection of authentic and tasty Indian appetizers, entrées and desserts, as well as a great international beer selection. (11-4-10) $$-$$$ SAFFRON INDIAN BISTRO NW 7607 N. Oracle Road. 742-9100. Open MondaySaturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.

Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. Subtle, delicate preparations in mod, minimalist surroundings. Portions are pricier than at other local Indian restaurants, but large. If you want to taste the heat, you need to ask for it. (9-18-08) $$-$$$ SHER-E PUNJAB C 853 E. Grant Road. 624-9393. Open daily 11 a.m.-

2:30 p.m. and 5-10 p.m. Café/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Sher-e Punjab is near the top of many lists as one of the best Indian restaurants in Tucson. Whole, fresh foods and an amazing and eclectic array of spicing lends every dish here a distinct and delicious character.

A daily lunch buffet with changing dishes gives diners a chance to sample from a wide swath of the restaurant’s extensive menu. $-$$

ITALIAN AMARSI RISTORANTE NW 12152 N. Rancho Vistoso Blvd. 297-9491. Open Tuesday-Friday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Saturday and Sunday 4-9 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. With a wonderful assortment of standards, servers who know their stuff and an interesting wine list, Amarsi rocks.

Pasta offerings run the gamut, and there’s a nice assortment of veal, chicken and steak plates. We especially liked the stuffed mushrooms as an appetizer. Most desserts are house-made. (12-9-10) $$-$$$ AMERENO’S LITTLE ITALY C 2933 E. Grant Road. 721-1210. Open Tuesday-Friday

11 a.m.-2 p.m.; Tuesday-Saturday 5-10 p.m.; Sunday 4:30-9:30 p.m. Bistro/Wine Only. MC, V. Amereno’s offers a wide but not unwieldy menu of traditional Italian fare, and an attractive atmosphere. The dishes haven’t achieved a consistent quality, but nothing is poor, and many items, including the calamari, are quite good. (1-22-09) $$-$$$ BAZIL’S NE 4777 E. Sunrise Drive. 577-3322. Open daily 5-9 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, MC, V. This foothills favorite has been serving up plenty of great Italian and Continental cuisine for more than 25 years. A dizzying array of choices, huge portions and friendly service add up to a more-than-pleasant dining experience. The cioppino is outstanding. You won’t walk away hungry.

(7-15-04) $$-$$$ BRIO TUSCAN GRILLE C 150 W. Wetmore Road. 887-2388. Open SundayThursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This upscale chain serves fine American-style centralItalian food. Warm service, a elegant room and an inviting terrace (curtained off from the Tucson Mall parking lot) make it worth a shot if you’re within range of the mall, hungry and in the mood for something better than Olive Garden. Breads and salads are terrific; appetizers and entrées are more hit-or-miss. The wine list, mostly California and Italian, features more than 40 interesting choices, many available by the glass. (12-15-11) $$-$$$ CAFFE MILANO C 46 W. Congress St. 628-1601. Open MondayWednesday 8:30 a.m.-3 p.m.; Thursday and Friday 8:30 a.m.-3 p.m. and 5:30-9:30 p.m.; Saturday 5:30-9:30 p.m. Café/Counter/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Whether it’s by weekday or weekend night, this downtown spot is a joy. Lunches are affordable and offer sandwiches, soups, salads and pastas. Dinner offers a full menu of Italian staples and house specialties. The patio at night is a great spot to enjoy downtown at its finest. The wine list is intensely Italian but has a price range for every pocket. Desserts and breakfasts also sing of Italy. (10-5-06) $$-$$$

Expires 12-31-12 52 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

CAFFE TORINO NW 10325 N. La Canada Drive, No. 151. 297-3777.

Open Monday 8 a.m.-2 p.m.; Tuesday-Friday 8 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-9 p.m.; Saturday 7:30 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-9 p.m.; Sunday 7:30 a.m.-1 p.m. and 4-8 p.m. Café/ Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Caffe Torino serves gigantic, shareable portions of beautifully executed entrées.

Flavors are authentic, and the menu offers a wide range of options. A well-thought-out wine list and a beautifully decorated space complete the experience—but don’t expect a quick meal. (4-21-11) $$-$$$ CARUSO’S C 434 N. Fourth Ave. 624-5765. Open TuesdayThursday and Sunday 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11:30 a.m.-11 p.m. Café/Beer and Wine.

AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Caruso’s has been around since 1938, and based on the crowds the restaurant draws on the weekends, it’ll be around beyond 2038. The service is warm and friendly while the food is inexpensive and satisfying. Caruso’s patio seating offers a special dining experience. (7-17-03) $-$$ DOLCE VITA E 7895 E. Broadway Blvd. 298-3700. Open MondayFriday 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m.; Saturday and Sunday 4-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Spaghetti and meatballs is a surefire hit here, as are the pizza and eggplant parmigiana. $$-$$$ ENOTECA PIZZERIA WINE BAR C 58 W. Congress St. 623-0744. Open TuesdayThursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Saturday 4-10 p.m. Bistro/Beer and Wine. AMEX, MC, V. Enoteca is a busy restaurant with delicious pastas, salads, pizzas and dinner entrées and more. The food is consistently tasty and reasonably priced. (5-12-05) $-$$

are all tasty, if a bit pricey, but the view pushes NoRTH over the top. (2-26-04) $$$-$$$$ PIAZZA GAVI NE 5415 N. Kolb Road. 577-1099. Open SundayThursday 7 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 7 a.m.-10 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. For anyone who loved the small trattorias that were the hallmark of the Gavi empire, this place may seem cavernous.

But size doesn’t matter. Gavi brings all its wonderful touches to this roomy eatery: good food, giant portions and friendly service. The choices are plentiful; there are more than 20 types of pasta sauce alone. Pizza is on the menu. So is breakfast. Sandwiches are big enough for two (or three). The wine list leans toward the Italian side, but what else would you expect? Don’t miss the amazing happy-hour deals. (7-12-12) $$-$$$ ROMA IMPORTS C 627 S. Vine Ave. 792-3173. Open Monday-Thursday

9 a.m.-6 p.m.; Friday-Saturday 9 a.m.-8 p.m. Counter/ No Alcohol. MC, V. Despite its odd location, Roma Imports manages to draw a crowd. Why? Its food rocks.

The sandwiches and pasta specials are almost perfect for a causal meal to eat at La Taverna, Roma’s in-house dining area. If you want some prepared goodies to take home, or are looking for the perfect ingredients to make your own Italian meal, you can’t fail. And the desserts are amazing, too. (3-8-07) $ TAVOLINO RISTORANTE ITALIANO NW 2890 E. Skyline Drive. 531-1913. Open Monday-

GIACOMO’S NE 6878 E. Sunrise Drive. 529-7358. Open TuesdaySunday 4:30-9:30 p.m. Summer hours: ThursdaySunday 5-9:30 p.m. Café. Beer, Wine and Specialty Drinks. AMEX, MC, V. Pictures of Italy’s coastline adorn this Italian restaurant with a cozy authentic atmosphere.

Friendly service, delicious food and reasonable prices make Giacomo’s a place to find amore. (12-18-03) $$-$$$

Thursday 11 a.m.-3 p.m. and 5-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-3 p.m. and 5-11 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Tavolino is now a shiny, chic kind of place—and it didn’t miss a beat in the move.

The appetizers are fresh and fabulous. The pastas will delight. (Try the tagliatelle alla Bolognese; it’s killer.)

Other entrées, especially those coming off the grill, are great examples of how Italian food is supposed to be.

Service is most professional. (8-12-10) $$-$$$

GUSTO OSTERIA

TRATTORIA PINA

E 7153 E. Tanque Verde Road. 722-9487. Open

NE 5541 N. Swan Road. 577-6992. Open Monday-

Monday-Thursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. In this charming eastside spot, rustic Italian food is served in a most convivial atmosphere, and there’s a wine list with prices that can’t be beat. The tender manicotti is freshly made and stuffed with a delightful cheese mix; the eggplant sandwich is delicious.

Service is top-notch, and the patio is the kind of place you could easily spend a couple of hours. Remember that the initial recipes are courtesy of the master, Joe Scordato. (3-22-12) $$-$$$

Friday 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 5-9 p.m.; Saturday 4:30-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, MC, V. Some individual dishes shine, but others would do well to be avoided. If you order carefully and bring the right company, the spectacular mountain views can seduce you into a moment of sheer well-being. (11-30-00) $-$$

J. MARINARA’S NW 8195 N. Oracle Road. 989-3654. Open TuesdaySaturday 11 a.m.-2 p.m. and 3:30-8:30 p.m.; Sunday 3:30-8:30 p.m. Café/Full Bar. MC, V. Brought to you by the folks who ran Ascolese’s, this East Coast Italian joint cooks up all of the usual Italian favorites. Steaks are also available, and on Sunday, you’ll find prime rib. At dinner, the atmosphere is warm and friendly, like a restaurant you’d find back in the old neighborhood. If you dig the marinara sauce, you can purchase a jar to take home. (5-26-11) $-$$$ MAD MARIO’S ITALIAN DELI C 1710 E. Speedway Blvd. 325-3258. Open daily 11

a.m.-8 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. DIS, MC, V. While Mad Mario’s offers a wide variety of tasty Italian entrées, the sandwiches are the way to go here. The corned beef reuben is simply amazing—and so is the jovial service from Mario himself. The restaurant offers free delivery in the UA/midtown area for orders more than $20. (2-212) $-$$

VERONA ITALIAN RESTAURANT E 120 S. Houghton Road. 722-2722. Open Tuesday-

Sunday 4-9 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. DIS, MC, V, Checks.

With more than four dozen entrées to choose from, there are options aplenty at Verona. The portion sizes are huge, too. And the taste? Our veal Florentine and chicken picatta were divine, as were the desserts. The far eastside has itself a winner. (11-6-03) $$-$$$ VIRO’S ITALIAN BAKERY AND CAFE E 8301 E. 22nd St. 885-4045. Open Tuesday 9 a.m.-6

p.m.; Wednesday and Thursday 9 a.m.-8 p.m.; Friday 9 a.m.-9 p.m.; Saturday 8 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.-3 p.m. Counter/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V, Checks. This charming little Italian joint serves up meaty sandwiches, fresh breads and pastries, pizzas and a handful of pasta dishes, along with impressive daily specials—-including a Sunday breakfast buffet that may be one of the best brunch deals in town. (10-25-07) $-$$ VITELLO’S RISTORANTE ITALIANO NW 15930 N. Oracle Road, No. 178. 825-0140. Open

Monday 4-8 p.m.; Tuesday-Thursday and Sunday 11 a.m.-8 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Café/ Beer and Wine. DIS, MC, V. What a pleasant surprise Vitello’s is. It’s cozy; the staff is friendly; and the menu has just about everything Italian you might crave. The sauces range from a house marinara to a creamy vodka to a rich gorgonzola to a briny white clam. The pizzas are also quite good; they’re simple and rustic. Panini, salads, veal, chicken, seafood and dishes are also available. The cannoli is like Nana used to make. (1-13-11) $-$$$

MAMA LOUISA’S ITALIAN RESTAURANT S 2041 S. Craycroft Road. 790-4702. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday noon-8 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. It’s hard to find anything wrong with Mama Louisa’s, a Tucson treasure since 1956. The food’s amazing; the service is superb; the prices are reasonable. There’s a large menu for both lunch and dinner, with plenty of vegetarian options. Try Joe’s Special; it’s the signature dish for a reason. (3-20-03) $-$$

C 4310 N. Campbell Ave. 795-7221. Open Monday-

MICHELANGELO RISTORANTE ITALIANO NW 420 W. Magee Road. 297-5775. Open MondaySaturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Café/Full Bar. AMEX, MC, V. A popular northwest side venue, Michelangelo’s is sure to please if you temper your expectations with a note of realism--that note being this is Tucson, and good, authentic Italian fare is very hard to find. (5-2-02) $-$$

Thursday 11:30 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, MC, V. If there’s something Vivace doesn’t do well, we’ve never been able to discover what it is. Lots of innovative pasta dishes, grilled meats and fresh seafood distinguish the menu, along with salads, appetizers and desserts to die for. It’s a bustling bistro that deserves its ongoing popularity. (4-26-01) $$-$$$

VIVACE

NORTH

ZONA 78

NW 2995 E. Skyline Drive. 299-1600. Open Monday-

NW 78 W. River Road. 888-7878. Open daily 11 a.m.-

Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m.; Sunday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. La Encantada has itself a gem in NoRTH, brought to you to the folks behind Wildflower and Zinburger. The pastas, fish and pizzas

10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Also at 7301 E. Tanque Verde Road (296-7878). It’s casual; it’s cool; and the food makes the most of many fine Italian items (goodies from Willcox and Australia are also a big part of the scene). The bar is a great place

to hang out while you enjoy one of the many wines or house specialty drinks. The pizzas are stone-fired with great combos, or you can build your own. This is definitely a place to be a regular. (7-6-06) $$

part of the growing Peruvian-cuisine scene in Tucson.

With mild flavors and quick, friendly service, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a tasty vacation for your palate from the sea of southside Mexican-food restaurants. (3-3-11) $$

JAMAICAN

DOS LOCOS NW Hilton El Conquistador, 10000 N. Oracle Road.

544-5000. Open daily 5-11 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, MC, V. Dos Locos easily holds its own in the limited local nuevo Latino market. If its dishes lack the unusual imagination of those at, say, CafĂŠ Poca Cosa, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a restaurant that lets you feel a little daring, without really straying too far afield. (12-6-07) $$-$$$

CEEDEE JAMAICAN KITCHEN E 1070 N. Swan Road. 795-3400. Open TuesdaySunday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m. Counter/Full Bar. DIS, MC, V. Yes, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll find jerk chicken here (and oh, what heavenly jerk it is), but there are plenty of other island specialties to choose from as well: curry chicken, oxtails, plantains and more. The side called festival is like a hush puppy, only bigger and better. Desserts are unusual but tasty; the cold drinks refresh. Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bob Marley music, and the staff is friendly. The only thing missing here is the beach. (10-21-10) $-$$

KOREAN KIMCHI TIME C 2900 E. Broadway Blvd., No. 186. 305-4900. Open Monday-Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10:30 p.m.; Sunday 4-9 p.m. CafĂŠ. Beer, Wine and Specialty Drinks. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. As you would expect from the restaurantâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s name, kimchi is the star at Kimchi Timeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s good stuff. Adventurous diners will love the bibim bap and the kimchi chigae (kimchi soup with pork and tofu), while unadventurous types will love the katsu and the bulgogi. Go there; the five complimentary kimchi plates served with each meal are worth the trip in and of themselves. (9-27-12) $$ KOREA HOUSE E 4030 E. Speedway Blvd. 325-4377. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 5-9:30 p.m. Diner/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Bulgoki of fire and flavor, and mouth-watering grilled beef ribs, Korean-style. Good noodle soups, also. $-$$ SEOUL KITCHEN E 4951 E. Grant Road. 881-7777. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m.; Sunday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m. Bistro/Beer and Wine. AMEX, MC, V. Seoul Kitchen dishes up quick, affordable and authentic Korean food with a smile. The crab puffs are a canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t-miss item, and be prepared to be overwhelmed with tasty side dishes and banchan plates.

Portions are generous, and the food is delicious; you definitely wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t leave hungry. (2-11-10) $-$$

LATIN AMERICAN CONTIGO COCINA LATINA NW 1745 E. River Road. 299-1730. Open MondaySaturday 5-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Contigo adds a touch of class and chic to Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s restaurant scene with delicious Spanish, South and Central American-inspired dishes and inventive cocktails.

Serving up twists on classics from these regions, Contigo puts a focus on sustainably sourced ingredients. With lots of seafood and vegetarian options, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s something for every palate. (8-19-10) $$$ DON PEDROâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S PERUVIAN BISTRO S 3386 S. Sixth Ave. 209-1740. Open Monday-

Saturday 10:30 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday 10:30 a.m.-6 p.m. Bistro. Beer and Specialty Drinks. DIS, MC, V. Don Pedroâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, a transplant from Rocky Point, Sonora, is a big

INCAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S PERUVIAN CUISINE NE 6878 E. Sunrise Drive. 299-1405. Open Tuesday-

Sunday 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Bistro. Beer, Wine and Specialty Drinks. DIS, MC, V and checks. Incaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is the place to go for a twist on the usual meat and potatoes. Warmly decorated with friendly service and delicately spiced food, Incaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s offers dishes that are truly unique. The pollo entero (whole roasted chicken), the ceviche mixto and the pisco sour are canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t-miss hits. Make sure you make a reservation. (4-1-10) $-$$ MAYA QUETZAL C 429 N. Fourth Ave. 622-8207. Open MondayThursday 11:30 a.m.-8:45 p.m.; Friday and Saturday noon-8:45 p.m. Summer hours: Monday-Thursday 11:30 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-8:30 p.m.; Friday and Saturday noon-8:45 p.m. CafĂŠ. Beer, Wine and Specialty Drinks. MC, V. Nearly magical yet simple taste combinations from the Yucatan and Central America are featured. You can almost taste the green of the tropics in Maya Quetzalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s vegetable and nut-meat combinations. $ MIGUELâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S NW 5900 N. Oracle Road. 887-3777. Open daily 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Summer hours: Monday-Thursday 3-10 p.m.; Friday-Sunday noon-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Enjoy regional Mexican dishes in a lovely setting. Plenty of seafood and other entrĂŠes are served up in unique and tasty sauces. A tequila loverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s heaven with choices aplenty. (10-7-04) $$-$$$

meats and seafood, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re sure to discover some new favorites. Thuan Kieu Vietnamese restaurant (open daily, 10:30 a.m. to 8:30 p.m., cafĂŠ) has an extensive selection with really fresh, tasty ingredients, and Nan Tian BBQ (open Wednesday through Monday, 10:30 a.m. to 7:30 p.m., counter) serves up all kinds of barbecued delicacies, from chicken and duck feet to whole roasted suckling pigs. (5-6-10) RINCON MARKET C 2513 E. Sixth St. 327-6653. Open Monday-Friday 7 a.m.-9 p.m.; Saturday 7 a.m.-8 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.-8 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V, Checks.

Open as a neighborhood market since 1926, Rincon Market today is known for its wide variety of fresh, inexpensive foods. In the dining area, there are options aplenty: deli sandwiches, a large salad bar, a grill, baked goods, coffees, rotisserie chicken and more. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s an iconic Tucson place to grab a quick, simple, delicious meal. (7-14-05) $ TIME MARKET C 444 E. University Blvd. 622-0761. Market open daily 7 a.m.-10 p.m. Deli open Monday-Thursday 10 a.m.-8 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 10 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Counter/Beer and Wine. MC, V. Time Market is four things in one. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a top-notch deli; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a popular woodfire pizza joint; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a coffee bar; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a quirky market full of hard-to-find foods. With a friendly staff and reasonable prices, Time Market is a longtime Tucson favorite. We recommend the green gringo sandwich, mixing a green corn tamale with shredded chicken, cheddar, salsa and green olives on sourdough. Yum! (7-14-05) $-$$

BKâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S S 5118 S. 12th Ave. 295-0105. Open Sunday-Thursday 9 a.m.-midnight; Friday and Saturday 9 a.m.-2 a.m.

Counter/No Alcohol. MC, V. Also at 2680 N. First Ave. (207-2245). Nothing fancy, nothing grand, just a boatload of some of the best carne asada youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re ever likely to sample. A scrumptious salsa bar with lots of goodies to complement your tacos, quesadillas or caramelos (quesadillas with carne asada) is a delightful bonus, and the Sonoran hot dogs put the usual ballpark fare to shame. $ BLANCO TACOS AND TEQUILA NW 2905 E. Skyline Drive, No. 246. 232-1007. Open Sunday-Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Another addition to the Fox restaurant empireâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and the second Fox restaurant at La Encantadaâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;is yet another winner. Excellent updated Sonoran food, crackling service, a spectacular view and a hip, young vibe make Blanco worth the foothills prices. (8-30-07) $$$-$$$$ BOCA C 828 E. Speedway Blvd. 777-8134. Open Monday-

Saturday 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday noon-8 p.m.

Counter/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Boca offers upscale indoor versions of Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s street food, and is doing tacos the right way, with lots of flavor and highquality ingredients. Generous portions and playfully presented food are just the beginning. With a few dozen tequilas at the bar and reasonable prices, Boca is the perfect addition to the university-area restaurant scene.

(10-7-10) $-$$ LA BOTANA TACO GRILL AND CANTINA C 3200 N. First Ave. 777-8801. Open Monday-

MEXICAN BIRRĂ?A GUADALAJARA C 304 E. 22nd St. 624-8020. Open daily 7 a.m.-8:30 p.m. Counter/Diner/No Alcohol. Cash only. One of the best quick-stop Mexican food venues in town. The carne asada and birrĂ­a burros are standouts. $

Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.

CafĂŠ. Beer and Margaritas. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This little â&#x20AC;&#x153;cantinaâ&#x20AC;? offers big flavors and lots of fun. Build your own burrito or quesadilla by mixing and matching grilled meats, seafood and an assortment of other goodies. Seafood dishes are done well here, and dining on the patio is reminiscent of Mexican beachside spots. On weekends, margaritas are 2-for-1 all day long. Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re the perfect counter to the heat and smoke from many dishes. (1-21-10) $

TUCSON TAMALE COMPANY C 2545 E. Broadway Blvd. 305-4760. Open Monday-

Friday 10 a.m.-7 p.m.; Saturday 8 a.m.-7 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.-3 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. The Tucson Tamale Company offers a great origin story: Intuit executive decides to follow a dream by starting a tamale business in the middle of a heinous economy.

The Tucson Tamale Company also offers some delicious food: Try the Santa Fe tamale, with pork loin, green chiles, cheddar, tomatoes and garlic. Vegans and those with gluten allergies have plenty to eat here, as the masa is gluten-free. Get a dozen tamales to go; they reheat easily and quickly in the microwave. (3-12-09) $

Find these listings and more @

ROUND UP FOR THE FOOD BANK During the month of December, the Food Conspiracy Co-op and its shoppers are raising money for the Community Food Bank of Southern Arizona. To ďŹ nd out how you can help the Food Bank, go to:

MARKET EUROPEAN MARKET AND DELI E 4500 E. Speedway Blvd., No. 36. 512-0206. Open Monday-Saturday 9 a.m.-8 p.m.; Sunday 9 a.m.-3 p.m.

Bistro/Full Bar. DIS, MC, V. A smattering of EasternEuropean beers, wines, sweets, liquors and other groceries makes this market/deli unique. Fast, friendly service and tasty classics round out the menu along with a wide selection of deli meats and cheeses. (1-29-09) $ LEE LEE ORIENTAL SUPERMARKET NW 1990 W. Orange Grove Road. 638-8328. Open daily 9 a.m.-9 p.m. Lee Lee Oriental Supermarket is far more than an average grocery store. With thousands of products that span the globe, along with fresh produce,

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412 N. Fourth Ave. (520) 624-4821 foodconspiracy.coop

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& 'U -PXFMM 3E /P t 520-319-5554 t .PO 4BU BN QN DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

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Performing Dec 13 Larry Loud Dec 14 Neil McCallion & the Mighty Maxwells Dec 15 Railbirdz Dec 16 Rafael Moreno Quartet Dec 18 Local Performers Dec 19 T Greg Dec 20 Don Nottingham Dec 21 Celtic Christmas Concert

505 West Miracle Mile 520-207-2429 www.MontereyCourtAZ.com 54 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

MUSIC

SOUNDBITES

Gypsyhawk heads to Tucson for the first time—with riffs running against the grain

By Stephen Seigel, musiced@tucsonweekly.com

Hard Rock Revelry

Kaia Chesney

BY GENE ARMSTRONG, garmstrong@tucsonweekly.com Gypsyhawk e’ll have to excuse Andrew Packer if he was a bit enthusiastic when he talked with the Tucson Weekly a few weeks ago. He and his hard-rock band, Gypsyhawk, had played Cleveland the night before, opening for the Sword, and he was simply pumped.

“It was the third sold-out show in a row, man,” the guitarist said. “This has been an amazing tour so far!”

Hot on the heels of their second album, Revelry and Resilience, Gypsyhawk will play in Tucson for the first time on Saturday, Dec. 15, at Club Congress.

Gypsyhawk’s set will be sandwiched between two promising acts from Austin, Texas.

American Sharks, the first band on the bill, is an up-and-coming punk-metal act. The mighty headliner is the Sword, which plays a deliciously retro sound that balances elements of proto-metal, doom and stoner-rock with songs inspired by fantasy fiction and sci-fi. The Sword recently saw the release of its mindmelting fifth album, Apocryphon.

For Packer, being on the road with Gypsyhawk—which calls Pasadena, Calif., home—is the fulfillment of a dream. “I mean, I always wanted to be in a band that was more than just a local band, you know? And now we’re out there doing it every night.”

Gypsyhawk came together in 2008, after bassist and vocalist Eric Harris abruptly left the Ohio-based heavy-metal act Skeletonwitch. He ended up in the Los Angeles area, and was set on playing music that returned to the 1970s-style of groove-heavy hard rock.

“Eric wanted to start a rock band,” Packer said, “and I was the only guitar-player in L.A. that he knew. And all I wanted to do was rock.”

Harris and Packer found a second guitarist and a drummer through Craigslist, and released one album, Patience and Perseverance, in 2010 for the indie Creator/Destructor Records. But their bandmates left soon after.

After repopulating the band with drummer Ian Brown and guitarist Erik Kluiber, Gypsyhawk was back in action and recording the new album for legendary metal-label Metal Blade Records.

Packer has much more confidence in the newly reconstituted band, and the new album is evidence.

“The best way to explain the differences is that for the first album, even though we knew we were gonna be a rock band, we weren’t sure what kind of rock band, and we weren’t sure what kind of album we wanted to make until we were making it.

“For the new album, we had time to study

W

THE COVER-UP IS HERE! THE COVER-UP IS HERE!

what we wanted to do, and we were more focused, writing all the parts in advance. We upped the ante with stronger chords, not just dragging riffs out.”

In sum, he said, Gyspyhawk is “truly a focused fighting unit now.”

Indeed, Gypyshawk impressively re-creates the sound of bands such as Thin Lizzy, Black Sabbath, Hawkwind and Deep Purple, while forging its own broadsword from the same raw materials. Reinforcing that dedication to the ’70s sound, the last track on Revelry and Resilience is an explosive cover of Rick Derringer’s hit “Rock and Roll, Hoochie Koo.” “I think we have something for everybody, but yeah, we all just happened to grow up listening to a lot of rock from the 1960s and ’70s. But there was a lot of punk and metal among those records, too. We’re four heavy-metal guys, for sure, but we want to play rock ’n’ roll like you used to hear it, when it was heavy and intense.”

Packer said he and his Gypsyhawk pals— who range in age from mid-20s to late-30s all have played extreme forms of metal at one time or another, but he believes some of that stuff has passed its expiration date.

“When we started, we were going to maybe be more extreme. But metal is played out these days, with too many subcategories and Cookie Monster vocals. And then, in addition to that, there has to be a singer with a high voice screaming. I was talking to the guy from Lamb of God, and he said the screaming thing is done.

“Metal will always be around, but I think the whole popularity of extreme stuff like death metal or black metal or deathcore, or what have you, is going to phase out. I love plenty of bands that do that. Not a lot of them around anymore.

Suffocation and Obituary—those bands were doing something really good, but that’s not

Gypsyhawk with the Sword and American Sharks 7 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 15 Club Congress 311 E. Congress St. $16 advance; $18 day of 622-8848; hotelcongress.com

always the case with the bands out there now.”

Like many of Gypsyhawk’s fans, Packer grew up enamored of the music of Jimi Hendrix, but his other two guitar heroes were Nirvana’s Kurt Cobain and Metallica’s Kirk Hammett. He was also heavily influenced by such acts as the Beatles and Led Zeppelin, he said.

Some listeners will note that Gypsyhawk’s music bears an uncanny similarity to that of classic Irish rockers Thin Lizzy. It’s there in Harris’ Phil Lynott-style vocals and the furious two-guitar attack, but also in the swinging rhythm section and melodies sharing space with irresistible riffage.

Packer understands the comparison, but he says he and Harris were never planning things out that carefully. He never really listened to Thin Lizzy until just a few years ago.

“I came late to that shit, and at first, I didn’t see what they were trying to do. When I heard the song ‘Emerald,’ and I totally got it, I thought, ‘Now I know why everyone likes this band.’”

When it comes down to it, Gypsyhawk wants to build music for the future by looking to the past, Packer said.

“We hope to inject just a little of what we grew up with into today’s hard rock, something a little more timeless, using melody and good tunes. Those are things that will always be popular in music.”

I’m pretty darn sure the Mayans are wrong about this whole world-ending-next-week thing, but in case they’re not, you wanna have as much fun as possible until Dec. 21, right? We’ve got you, ahem, covered.

Tonight, Thursday, Dec. 13, marks Night One of The Great Cover-Up, the best music-charity event of the year, at Plush, 340 E. Sixth St. But you read last week’s Soundbites, so you already know that, right? Right?

If not, go back and read last week’s column, where you’ll find tonight’s lineup of local acts, who will be performing 20-minute sets by national and international acts more well-known than themselves. Basically, it’s a way for local acts to indulge their subconscious desire to be a tribute band for a night. And it’s also a way for the event’s beneficiary, TAMHA (Tucson Artists and Musicians Healthcare Alliance), which provides informational and monetary health-care assistance to people in the local arts community, to put some much-needed money in its coffers.

So, now that we know all about what’s happening tonight, let’s look at what’s to come over the next couple of nights and a day.

The Cover-Up continues on Friday, Dec. 14, at Club Congress, 311 E. Congress St.; resumes on the patio at Hotel Congress on the afternoon of Saturday, Dec. 15; and finishes up that night at the Rialto Theatre, 318 E. Congress St. A total of 50 local acts will be performing over the course of the weekend. Keep in mind that we’re telling you only what time you’ll hear the bands being covered (I’m one of the event’s organizers), along with a random list of who will be covering them. Call us crazy, but we enjoy a little mystery in our lives. That said, here’s a schedule: Acts being covered on Night Two, Friday, Dec. 14, at Club Congress: The Lovin’ Spoonful (7 p.m.), Rod Stewart (7:30 p.m.), Black Sabbath (8 p.m.), Grizzly Bear (8:30 p.m.), heavy-metal gods (9 p.m.), Dr. John (9:30 p.m.), Mulatu Astatke (10 p.m.), Rick Diculous (10:30 p.m.), Fleetwood Mac (11 p.m.), Weezer (11:30 p.m.), The Pretenders (midnight), Tool (12:30 a.m.), Rage Against the Machine (1 a.m.) and Alice Cooper (1:30 a.m.).

In no particular order, the acts doing the covering: The Cordials, Spacefish, The Modeens, Texas Trash and the Trainwrecks, Chicha Dust (featuring Gabriel Sullivan and Brian Lopez), Leila Lopez, the Wayback Machine, 8 Minutes to Burn, American Android, Bulls on Parade, Acoustic Metal, Sunday Drivers and Cheepness.

Acts being covered during the day on Saturday, Dec. 15, on the patio at Hotel Congress: Evan Dando and the Lemonheads (12:30 p.m.), Robert Johnson (1 p.m.), Supertramp (1:30 p.m.), The Doors (2 p.m.), ’80s one-hit wonders (2:30 p.m.), Cake (3 p.m.), James Brown (3:30 p.m.) and Tom Waits (4 p.m.).

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

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SOUNDBITES CONTINUED from Page 55

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The local acts doing the covering, in no particular order: Roll Acosta, Sinphonics, Roman Barten-Sherman, Smallvox, Kyle Brondson, Jumper, The Tangelos and Jeremy Michael Cashman.

Acts being covered on Night Three, Saturday, Dec. 15, at the Rialto Theatre: Joe Walsh (6 p.m.), Quiet Riot (6:30 p.m.), Flogging Molly (7 p.m.), Leonard Cohen (7:30 p.m.), Stevie Wonder (8 p.m.), Dixie Chicks (8:30 p.m.), The Kinks (9 p.m.), Violent Femmes (9:30 p.m.), The Smiths (10 p.m.), LCD Soundsystem (10:30 p.m.), Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers (11 p.m.), OutKast (11:30 p.m.), Paul Simon (midnight), Hall and Oates (12:30 a.m.) and the Red Hot Chili Peppers (1 a.m.).

The local acts doing the covering, in no particular order: Electric Blankets, LeeAnne Savage, … music video?, The Tryst, Some of Them Are Old, Holy Rolling Empire, Wolf Larsen, The Gallery, The Distortionists, Rich Girl and the Private Eyes, Hank Topless, the David Clark Band, Skinkfinger, The Gunrunners and The Gallery.

If you plan on attending, please try to arrive early. These acts, no matter their time slot, have been slaving away to ensure your good time, and it would be a shame to miss something awesome, doncha think?

Although the action at Club Congress on Friday night is 21-and-older, the daytime portion of the event, on Congress’ patio, on Saturday, is free for all ages to attend (though if you care to cough up a few bucks for TAMHA, you’ll get admiration from your peers, and possibly a high five). The Rialto portion that night is also all-ages, but you’ll have to make a donation to attend. How much? Tickets are $8 for one night; $12 for two nights; and $15 for the whole shebang.

Bear in mind that the schedule may be altered slightly as the need arises. For the most-current schedule, head to the Weekly’s music blog, We Got Cactus; GreatCoverUpTucson.com; or the Great CoverUp Facebook event page. The phone number for Hotel Congress is 622-8848, and you can contact the Rialto Theatre at 740-1000.

Get excited, people! See you there!

YOUR SECOND CHANCE TO SEE A GREAT BAND The last time Austin’s My Jerusalem played in town, in July at Plush, they were a largely unknown entity. Because I had seen them perform live a few years ago in Austin, at South by Southwest, I knew just how amazing they are.

In other words, I had something of a leg up on a band that had never before played in Tucson.

And since part of my job is to clue you in to great bands you might not know about, I urged you all to check them out. Here’s what I wrote: “Since (seeing them perform in Austin), I’ve repeatedly spun the band’s 2010 debut album, Gone for Good (One Little Indian), as well as a couple of EPs, to the point of addiction. My Jerusalem’s music contains instantly familiar (though surprisingly nonderivative) melodies, elements of fervent gospel, and a fire-andbrimstone urgency. (Bandleader Jeff) Klein’s obviously been influenced by his time performing with (Greg) Dulli, but his songs are far from sound-alikes. There’s a certain uplifting grandiosity to them, but they never stray into the overblown. … Though My Jerusalem is far from a household name (yet), they’ve become critics’ darlings, earning praise from the BBC and

Hank Topless

TOP TEN The 17th Street Guitar and World Music Store’s top sales for the week ending Dec. 7, 2012 1. Grams and Krieger 5 (self-released)

2. Ron Doering The Balladeer (self-released) NPR, as well as being named one of Daytrotter’s Best of 2011.”

I attended that Plush show, which blew away the 20 or so people who were there with me (and at the same time, I learned just how much sway I have over my readers). As soon as the band finished playing, I walked over to a Weekly music contributor who was there to find out what s/he thought. Before I could ask, this person said, through a wide grin, “Holy shit!

What the hell was that?!” Exactly. (Full disclosure: I consider Jeff Klein a friend.)

Since then, My Jerusalem has released a fantastic second album, the aptly named Preachers (The End Records), a study in despair and redemption which has racked up a slew of new accolades including great reviews (a 9/10 on PopMatters, for example) and being selected as KXCI FM 91.3’s National Pick of the Week. They’ve also toured with The Psychedelic Furs and The Wallflowers, and the reason they’re playing in Tucson this week is because they’re on their way to California to serve as the opening act for roots-punks X, on their annual X-mas Tour.

So, Tucson music fans, I urge you not to make the same mistake again. Go see My Jerusalem at Plush, 340 E. Sixth St., at 10 p.m., Tuesday, Dec. 18, and feel free to thank me later. Admission is $7. If you need more info head to plushtucson.com, or call 7981298.

ON THE BANDWAGON Here are some more noteworthy shows happening this week: Bootsy Collins, Spirit Familia and Funky Bonz at the Rialto Theatre on Tuesday, Dec. 18; Blood on the Dance Floor, Jeffree Star and others at The Rock on Saturday, Dec. 15; Kinky and Mexican Dubwiser at the Rialto Theatre, next Thursday, Dec. 20; The Faceless, Revocation and others at The Rock on Friday, Dec. 14; Dry River Yacht Club, Sweet Ghosts and Andrew Collberg at Club Congress on Wednesday, Dec. 19; Bebe McPhereson and Smallvox at La Cocina on Wednesday, Dec. 19; The Coolers CD-release party for Listen Here at Boondocks Lounge on Saturday, Dec. 15; The Bennu Holiday Show with DJ Joshua Pocalips at Mr. Head’s on Saturday, Dec. 15; Texas Trash and the Trainwrecks at La Cocina, tonight, Thursday, Dec. 13; Last Call Girls at Boondocks Lounge on Sunday, Dec. 16; Festival Navidad: A Christmas Celebration at the Fox Tucson Theatre on Friday, Dec. 14; The Wyatts and Laches at The JunXion Bar on Friday, Dec. 14; The Furys and Sons of Providence at Surly Wench Pub on Saturday, Dec. 15; Volks and the Mud Howlers at Plush on Wednesday, Dec. 19.

3. Francisco Gonzalez Viejas Canciones Para Viejos Amigos (self-released)

4. Justin Valdez Deuce-Seven Off Suit (Los Muertos)

5. Sergio Mendoza y la Orkesta Live at the Rialto (self-released)

6. New Riders of the Purple Sage 17 Pine Avenue (Woodstock)

7. Greg Morton When Pigs Fly (self-released)

8. Kevin Pakulis Band Shadesville (self-released)

9. Gabriel Sullivan By the Dirt (Fell City)

10. Combo Westside Full Bloom (Tortuga)

Kevin Pakulis

CLUB LIST Here is a list of venues that offer live music, dancing, DJ music, karaoke or comedy in the Tucson area. We recommend that you call and confirm all events.

APPLEBEE’S ON GRANT 4625 E. Grant Road. 319-0544.

APPLEBEES ON WETMORE 565 E. Wetmore Road.

292-2600.

ARIZONA INN 2200 E. Elm St. 325-1541.

ARMITAGE WINE LOUNGE AND CAFÉ 2905 E. Skyline Drive, No. 168. 682-9740.

THE AULD DUBLINER 800 E. University Blvd. 206-0323.

AZUL RESTAURANT LOUNGE Westin La Paloma, 3800 E. Sunrise Drive. 742-6000.

THE BAMBOO CLUB 5870 E. Broadway Blvd., No. 524.

514-9665.

THE BASHFUL BANDIT 3686 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-8996.

BEAU BRUMMEL CLUB 1148 N. Main Ave. 622-9673.

BEDROXX 4385 W. Ina Road.

744-7655.

BEST WESTERN ROYAL SUN INN AND SUITES 1015 N. Stone Ave. 622-8871.

BIG WILLY’S RESTAURANT AND SPORTS GRILL 1118 E. Sixth St. 882-2121.

THE BISBEE ROYALE 94 Main St. Bisbee. (520) 432-6750.

THE BONE-IN STEAKHOUSE 5400 S. Old Spanish Trail.

885-4600.

BOONDOCKS LOUNGE 3306 N. First Ave. 690-0991.

BRATS 5975 W. Western Way Circle. 578-0341.

THE BREEZE PATIO BAR AND GRILL Radisson Suites. 6555 E. Speedway Blvd. 731-1414.

BRODIE’S TAVERN 2449 N. Stone Ave. 622-0447.

BUFFALO WILD WINGS 68 N. Harrison Road. 296-8409.

BUMSTED’S 500 N. Fourth Ave. 622-1413.

CAFÉ DESTA 758 S. Stone Ave. 370-7000.

CAFÉ PASSÉ 415 N. Fourth Ave. 624-4411.

THE CANYON’S CROWN RESTAURANT AND PUB 6958 E. Tanque Verde Road.

885-8277.

CASA VICENTE RESTAURANTE ESPAÑOL 375 S. Stone Ave. 884-5253.

CASCADE LOUNGE Loews Ventana Canyon Resort, 7000 N. Resort Drive. 615-5495.

CHE’S LOUNGE 350 N. Fourth Ave. 623-2088.

CHICAGO BAR 5954 E. Speedway Blvd. 748-8169.

CHUY’S MESQUITE BROILER 22ND STREET 7101 E. 22nd St. 722-5117.

CIRCLE S SALOON 16001 W. El Tiro Road. Marana. 682-5377.

CLUB CONGRESS 311 E. Congress St. 622-8848.

LA COCINA RESTAURANT, CANTINA AND COFFEE BAR 201 N. Court Ave. 622-0351.

COLT’S TASTE OF TEXAS STEAKHOUSE 8310 N. Thornydale Road. 572-5968.

COPPER QUEEN HOTEL 11 Howell Ave. Bisbee. (520) 432-2216.

COW PALACE 28802 S. Nogales Highway. Amado. (520) 398-8000.

COW PONY BAR AND GRILL 6510 E. Tanque Verde Road.

721-2781.

CUSHING STREET RESTAURANT AND BAR 198 W. Cushing St. 622-7984.

DAKOTA CAFE AND CATERING CO. 6541 E. Tanque Verde Road.

298-7188.

DELECTABLES RESTAURANT AND CATERING 533 N. Fourth Ave. 884-9289.

THE DEPOT SPORTS BAR 3501 E. Fort Lowell Road.

795-8110.

DESERT DIAMOND CASINO MONSOON NIGHTCLUB 7350 S. Nogales Highway. 294-7777.

DESERT DIAMOND CASINO SPORTS BAR Interstate 19 and Pima Mine Road. 294-7777.

DIABLOS SPORTS BAR AND GRILL 2545 S. Craycroft Road.

514-9202.

DON’S BAYOU CAJUN COOKIN’ 8991 E. Tanque Verde Road.

749-4410.

DRIFTWOOD BAR 2001 S. Craycroft Road. 790-4317.

EL CHARRO CAFÉ SAHUARITA 15920 S. Rancho Sahuarita.

Sahuarita. 325-1922.

EL CHARRO CAFÉ ON BROADWAY 6310 E. Broadway Blvd. 745-1922.

EL MEZÓN DEL COBRE 2960 N. First Ave. 791-0977.

EL PARADOR 2744 E. Broadway Blvd. 881-2744.

ELBOW ROOM 1145 W. Prince Road. 690-1011.

ELLIOTT’S ON CONGRESS 135 E. Congress St. 622-5500.

ENOTECA PIZZERIA WINE BAR 58 W. Congress St. 623-0744.

FAMOUS SAM’S BROADWAY 1830 E. Broadway Blvd.

884-0119.

FAMOUS SAM’S E. GOLF LINKS 7129 E. Golf Links Road.

296-1245.

FAMOUS SAM’S SILVERBELL 2320 N. Silverbell Road.

884-7267.

FAMOUS SAM’S VALENCIA 3010 W. Valencia Road.

883-8888.

FAMOUS SAM’S W. RUTHRAUFF 2480 W. Ruthrauff Road. 292-0492.

FAMOUS SAM’S IRVINGTON 2048 E. Irvington Road.

889-6007.

FAMOUS SAM’S ORACLE 8058 N. Oracle Road. 531-9464.

FAMOUS SAM’S PIMA 3933 E. Pima St. 323-1880.

FOX AND HOUND SMOKEHOUSE AND TAVERN Foothills Mall, 7625 N. La Cholla Blvd. 575-1980.

FROG AND FIRKIN 874 E. University Blvd. 623-7507.

LA FUENTE 1749 N. Oracle Road. 623-8659.

FUKU SUSHI 940 E. University Blvd. 798-3858.

GENTLE BEN’S BREWING COMPANY 865 E. University Blvd. 624-4177.

GOLD Westward Look Resort, 245 E. Ina Road. 917-2930, ext. 474.

THE GRILL AT QUAIL CREEK 1490 Quail Range Loop. Green Valley. 393-5806.

GUADALAJARA GRILL EAST 750 N. Kolb Road. 296-1122.

GUADALAJARA GRILL WEST 1220 E. Prince Road.

323-1022.

HACIENDA DEL SOL 5601 N. Hacienda del Sol Road.

299-1501.

HIDEOUT BAR AND GRILL 1110 S. Sherwood Village Drive.

751-2222.

THE HIDEOUT 3000 S. Mission Road. 791-0515.

HILDA’S SPORTS BAR 1120 Circulo Mercado. Rio Rico. (520) 281-9440.

THE HOG PIT SMOKEHOUSE BAR AND GRILL 6910 E. Tanque Verde Road. 722-4302.

THE HUT 305 N. Fourth Ave. 623-3200.

IBT’S 616 N. Fourth Ave. 882-3053.

IGUANA CAFE 210 E. Congress St. 882-5140.

IRISH PUB 9155 E. Tanque Verde Road. 749-2299.

JASPER NEIGHBORHOOD RESTAURANT AND BAR 6370 N. Campbell Ave., No. 160.

577-0326.

JAVELINA CANTINA 445 S. Alvernon Way. 881-4200, ext.

5373.

JEFF’S PUB 112 S. Camino Seco Road. 886-1001.

KNOW WHERE II 1308 W. Glenn St. 623-3999.

KON TIKI 4625 E. Broadway Blvd. 323-7193.

LAFFS COMEDY CAFFÉ 2900 E. Broadway Blvd. 323-8669.

LAS CAZUELITAS EVENT CENTER 1365 W. Grant Road.

206-0405.

LI’L ABNER’S STEAKHOUSE 8500 N. Silverbell Road.

744-2800.

LB SALOON 6925 E. Broadway Blvd. 886-8118.

LOOKOUT BAR AND GRILLE AT WESTWARD LOOK RESORT 245 E. Ina Road. 297-1151.

LOTUS GARDEN RESTAURANT 5975 E. Speedway Blvd.

298-3351.

MARGARITA BAY 7415 E. 22nd St. 290-8977.

MAVERICK 6622 E. Tanque Verde Road. 298-0430.

MAYNARDS MARKET AND KITCHEN 400 N. Toole Ave. 545-0577.

MCMAHON’S PRIME STEAKHOUSE 2959 N. Swan Road. 327-7463.

MESCAL BAR AND GRILL 70 N. Cherokee Trail. Mescal.

(520) 586-3905.

MIDTOWN BAR AND GRILL 4915 E. Speedway Blvd.

327-2011.

MINT COCKTAILS 3540 E. Grant Road. 881-9169.

MONTEREY COURT STUDIO GALLERIES AND CAFÉ 505 W. Miracle Mile. 207-2429.

MR. AN’S TEPPAN STEAK AND SUSHI 6091 N. Oracle Road.

797-0888.

MR. HEAD’S ART GALLERY AND BAR 513 N. Fourth Ave. 792-2710.

MUSIC BOX 6951 E. 22nd St. 747-1421.

NEVADA SMITH’S 1175 W. Miracle Mile. 622-9064.

NEW MOON TUCSON 915 W. Prince Road. 293-7339.

NORTH 2995 E. Skyline Drive.

299-1600.

O’MALLEY’S 247 N. Fourth Ave. 623-8600.

OLD FATHER INN 4080 W. Ina Road. Marana. 744-1200.

OLD PUEBLO GRILLE 60 N. Alvernon Way. 326-6000.

ON A ROLL 63 E. Congress St. 622-7655.

ORACLE INN 305 E. American Ave. Oracle. 896-3333.

O’SHAUGHNESSY’S 2200 N. Camino Principal. 296-7464.

OUTLAW SALOON 1302 W. Roger Road. 888-3910.

PAPPY’S DINER 1300 W. Prince Road. 408-5262.

PARADISO BAR AND LOUNGE Casino Del Sol, 5655 W. Valencia Road. (800) 344-9435.

THE PARISH 6453 N. Oracle Road. 797-1233.

LA PARRILLA SUIZA 2720 N. Oracle Road. 624-4300.

PEARSON’S PUB 1120 S. Wilmot Road. 747-2181.

PLAYGROUND BAR AND LOUNGE 278 E. Congress St. 396-3691.

PLUSH 340 E. Sixth St. 798-1298.

PURGATORY 1310 S. Alvernon Way. 795-1996.

PUTNEY’S 6090 N. Oracle Road. 575-1767.

PY STEAKHOUSE 5655 W. Valencia Road, inside Casino del Sol. (800) 344-9435.

RPM NIGHTCLUB 445 W. Wetmore Road. 869-6098.

RA SUSHI BAR RESTAURANT 2905 E. Skyline Drive.

615-3970.

RAGING SAGE COFFEE ROASTERS 2458 N. Campbell Ave. 320-5203.

REDLINE SPORTS GRILL 445 W. Wetmore Road. 888-8084.

RIALTO THEATRE 318 E. Congress St. 740-1000.

RIC’S CAFE/RESTAURANT 5605 E. River Road. 577-7272.

RILEY’S IRISH TAVERN 5140 N. La Cholla Blvd. 408-0507.

RIVER’S EDGE LOUNGE 4635 N. Flowing Wells Road.

887-9027.

RJ’S REPLAYS SPORTS PUB AND GRUB 5769 E. Speedway Blvd. 495-5136.

THE ROCK 136 N. Park Ave. 629-9211.

ROYAL SUN INN AND SUITES 1015 N. Stone Ave. 622-8871.

RUSTY’S FAMILY RESTAURANT AND SPORTS GRILLE 2075 W. Grant Road.

623-3363.

SALTY DAWG II 6121 E. Broadway Blvd., No. 106.

790-3294.

SAM HUGHES PLACE CHAMPIONSHIP DINING 446 N. Campbell Ave. 747-5223.

SAPPHIRE LOUNGE 61 E. Congress St. 624-9100.

SHERATON HOTEL AND SUITES 5151 E. Grant Road.

323-6262.

SHOOTERS STEAKHOUSE AND SALOON 3115 E. Prince Road.

322-0779.

SHOT IN THE DARK CAFÉ 121 E. Broadway Blvd. 882-5544.

SINBAD’S FINE MEDITERRANEAN CUISINE 810 E. University Ave. 623-4010.

SIR VEZA’S TACO GARAGE WETMORE 220 W. Wetmore Road. 888-8226.

SKY BAR 536 N. Fourth Ave. 622-4300.

THE SKYBOX RESTAURANT AND SPORTS BAR 5605 E. River Road. 529-7180.

SOLAR CULTURE 31 E. Toole Ave. 884-0874.

STADIUM GRILL 3682 W. Orange Grove Road. Marana.

877-8100.

THE STATION PUB AND GRILL 8235 N. Silverbell Road.

789-7040.

THE STEAKOUT RESTAURANT AND SALOON 3620 W. Tangerine Road. Marana.

572-1300.

STOCKMEN’S LOUNGE 1368 W. Roger Road. 887-2529.

SULLIVAN’S STEAK HOUSE 1785 E. River Road. 299-4275.

SURLY WENCH PUB 424 N. Fourth Ave. 882-0009.

TANQUE VERDE RANCH 14301 E. Speedway Blvd.

296-6275.

TANQUE VERDE SWAP MEET 4100 S. Palo Verde Road.

294-4252.

TERRY AND ZEKE’S 4603 E. Speedway Blvd. 325-3555.

THIRSTY’S NEIGHBORHOOD GRILL 2422 N. Pantano Road.

885-6585.

TRIDENT GRILL 2033 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-5755.

UNICORN SPORTS LOUNGE 8060 E. 22nd St., No. 118.

722-6900.

V FINE THAI 9 E. Congress St. 882-8143.

WHISKEY TANGO 140 S. Kolb Road. 344-8843.

WILDCAT HOUSE 1801 N. Stone Ave. 622-1302.

WINGS-PIZZA-N-THINGS 8838 E. Broadway Blvd. 722-9663.

WISDOM’S CAFÉ 1931 E. Frontage Road. Tumacacori.

398-2397.

WOODEN NICKEL 1908 S. Country Club Road. 323-8830.

WOODY’S 3710 N. Oracle Road.

292-6702.

WORLD FAMOUS GOLDEN NUGGET 2617 N. First Ave. 622-9202.

ZEN ROCK 121 E. Congress St. 624-9100.

THU DEC 13 LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Bob Linesch The Bisbee Royale Buzz and the Soul Senders Boondocks Lounge The Queen Bees (Sabra Faulk, Mitzi Cowell and Heather Hardy) The Breeze Patio Bar and Grill Live music Café Desta Live music Café Passé The John Einweck Jazz Quartet Casa Vicente Restaurante Español Live classical guitar Chicago Bar Neon Prophet La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar Stefan George, Texas Trash and the Train Wrecks, Hollow Hills Elliott’s on Congress The Kachina Speakeasy Review La Fuente Mariachi Estrellas de la Fuente Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live mariachi music Hacienda del Sol Aaron Gilmartin Jasper Neighborhood Restaurant and Bar The Holmes Levinson Group Las Cazuelitas Event Center Live music Maverick Jack Bishop Band McMahon’s Prime Steakhouse Lounge: Susan Artemis O’Malley’s Live music On a Roll Live music O’Shaughnessy’s Live pianist and singer Paradiso Bar and Lounge Freewill (Rush tribute) Plush The Great Cover Up RPM Nightclub 80’s and Gentlemen Rialto Theatre MarchFourth Marching Band, Diego’s Umbrella, Vokab, Kompany Sheraton Hotel and Suites Prime Example Sky Bar Secret Highway Secrets Sullivan’s Steak House Live music Whiskey Tango Live music

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC The Bamboo Club Karaoke with DJ Tony G Best Western Royal Sun Inn and Suites Y-Not Karaoke Buffalo Wild Wings Y-Not Karaoke Driftwood Bar El Charro Café Sahuarita Famous Sam’s Silverbell Amazing Star Karaoke Famous Sam’s Valencia Hilda’s Sports Bar The Hog Pit Smokehouse Bar and Grill Steve Morningwood acoustic open-mic night Jasper Neighborhood Restaurant and Bar Open mic with Bob Paluzzi Know Where II New Star Karaoke Margarita Bay Music Box Outlaw Saloon Chubbrock Entertainment Pappy’s Diner Open mic River’s Edge Lounge Karaoke with KJ David Royal Sun Inn and Suites Y Not Karaoke Stadium Grill Chubbrock Entertainment Thirsty’s Neighborhood Grill

DANCE/DJ Big Willy’s Restaurant and Sports Grill DJ Hurricane and Project Benny Blanco Diablos Sports Bar and Grill Bikini bash with DJ Mike Lopez Gentle Ben’s Brewing Company DJ spins music The Hideout Fiesta DJs The Hut DJ MGM IBT’s DJ spins music Javelina Cantina DJ M. Mr. Head’s Art Gallery and Bar DJ Bonus Pearson’s Pub DJ Wild Wes RJ’s Replays Sports Pub and Grub Drew Cooper, Matthew Mezza Sam Hughes Place Championship Dining DJ spins music Sapphire Lounge Salsa night Sir Veza’s Taco Garage Wetmore DJ Riviera

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE If you would like your band, club or solo act to be listed, send all pertinent times, dates, prices and places to: Club Listings, Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726. Fax listings to 792-2096. Or e-mail us at clubs@tucsonweekly.com.

Deadline to receive listings information is noon on Friday, seven days before the Thursday publication date. For display advertising information, call 294-1200.

DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

57

THU DEC 13

ALL SPORTS, ALL THE TIME!

YOUR GAME IS ON 25 HI-DEF TVS,2 LARGE HD PROJECTORS

FREE POOL

NEW YEAR’S EVE PARTY - DETAILS TO COME!

Every Wednesday

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Domestic Bottles All Day, Every Day!

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WWW.DIABLOSSPORTSBAR.COM OPEN 11AM - 2AM DAILY 2545 S CRAYCROFT RD • 514-9202

End of the World World

Party MAD MAX MEETS TANK GIRL COSTUME PARTY

9PM-CLOSE $100 PRIZE FOR BEST COSTUME $100 PRIZE FOR SEXIEST COSTUME GIVE-AWAYS! HAPPY HOUR ALL DAY! $4 SHOTS JAGERMEISTER $5 CAR BOMBS

DEC 21ST PUB

25 CENT SHOT AT 11:12PM PEARSON’S PUB (IF WE ALL SURVIVE!) 1120 S WILMOT

520-747-2181 58 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

COMEDY Laffs Comedy Caffé Open mic

TRIVIA/PUB QUIZ Bumsted’s Geeks Who Drink The Canyon’s Crown Restaurant and Pub Geeks Who Drink Driftwood Bar Team Trivia

$2.75 DOMESTIC BOTTLES $3.50 JUMBO CUERVO MARGARITAS & $2.25 CORONAS ALL DAY – EVERY DAY NEW $5 APPETIZER MENU

December 29th

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 57

Surly Wench Pub Jump Jive Thursday with DJ Ribz Unicorn Sports Lounge Y Not Entertainment V Fine Thai Foundation Thursdays: DJs spin music, art show, wine tasting Zen Rock DJ Kidd Kutz

FRI DEC 14 LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Dennis Reed The Bamboo Club Live music The Bashful Bandit Live music Bedroxx DJ Du and the Cooper Meza Band Boondocks Lounge Neon Prophet Café Passé Tom Walbank, Roman Barten-Sherman The Canyon’s Crown Restaurant and Pub Puca Cascade Lounge Doug Martin Chicago Bar The AmoSphere Chuy’s Mesquite Broiler 22nd Street Bobby Wilson Club Congress The Great Cover Up La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar The Greg Morton Band Cow Palace Live music Dakota Cafe and Catering Co. John Ronstadt and Howard Wooten Delectables Restaurant and Catering Live music El Mezón del Cobre Mariachi Azteca El Parador Descarga, Salsarengue, Tito y Su Nuevo Son Famous Sam’s E. Golf Links Shell Shock La Fuente Mariachi Estrellas de la Fuente Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live Latin music Hacienda del Sol Freddy Vesely The Hideout Sol Down Irish Pub Jeff Carlson Band Jasper Neighborhood Restaurant and Bar The Paul Marin Trio Las Cazuelitas Event Center Mariachis Li’l Abner’s Steakhouse Arizona Dance Hands Maverick Flipside McMahon’s Prime Steakhouse Lounge: Daniel “Sly” Slipetsky Mint Cocktails Barbara Harris Band Monterey Court Studio Galleries and Café Neil McCallion and the Mighty Maxwells Mr. An’s Teppan Steak and Sushi Edna and Ely with Malik Alkabir, Manny Brito Mr. Head’s Art Gallery and Bar Mothership Connection and Captain Antenna Old Father Inn Live music Oracle Inn Sunset Highway O’Shaughnessy’s Live pianist and singer Paradiso Bar and Lounge The Desert Cadillacs The Parish Saturnalia La Parrilla Suiza Mariachi music Plush Tesoro Redline Sports Grill Giant Blue Ric’s Cafe/Restaurant Live music River’s Edge Lounge Wild Ride Band The Rock The Faceless With Revocation, Haarp Machine

and Lethal Dosage Shooters Steakhouse and Saloon Andy Hersey Shot in the Dark Café Mark Bockel The Skybox Restaurant and Sports Bar 80’s and Gentlemen Stadium Grill Live music Sullivan’s Steak House Live music Tanque Verde Swap Meet Live music Whiskey Tango Live music Woody’s Susan Artemis

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC Best Western Royal Sun Inn and Suites Y-Not Karaoke Brats Brodie’s Tavern Driftwood Bar Famous Sam’s W. Ruthrauff Famous Sam’s Pima Iguana Cafe Jeff’s Pub Kustom Karaoke Know Where II New Star Karaoke LB Saloon Karaoke with 1Phat DJ Margarita Bay Midtown Bar and Grill Putney’s Karaoke with DJ Soup Riley’s Irish Tavern Chubbrock Entertainment Royal Sun Inn and Suites Y Not Karaoke Salty Dawg II Tucson’s Most Wanted Entertainment with KJ Sean Shooters Steakhouse and Saloon Stockmen’s Lounge Terry and Zeke’s Wings-Pizza-N-Things YNot Entertainment

DANCE/DJ The Auld Dubliner DJ spins music Big Willy’s Restaurant and Sports Grill DJ Obi-Wan Kenobi Casa Vicente Restaurante Español Flamenco guitar and dance show Circle S Saloon DJ BarryB La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar DJ Erupt Delectables Restaurant and Catering After Dark: DJs Elektra Tek, Seth Myles, Resonate, Fix The Depot Sports Bar DJ and music videos Desert Diamond Casino Monsoon Nightclub Groovin’ Fridays Old School party Desert Diamond Casino Sports Bar Fiesta DJs: Latin/ Urban night Diablos Sports Bar and Grill DJ Mike Lopez El Charro Café Sahuarita DJ spins music El Charro Café on Broadway DJ spins R&B El Parador Salsa-dance lessons with Jeannie Tucker Famous Sam’s Valencia DJ spins music Fuku Sushi DJ spins music IBT’s CelloFame Javelina Cantina DJ M. Maynards Market and Kitchen DJ spins music Music Box ’80s and more NoRTH DJ Phatal O’Malley’s DJ Dibs Sam Hughes Place Championship Dining DJ spins music Sapphire Lounge Flashback Fridays with DJ Sid the Kid Sinbad’s Fine Mediterranean Cuisine DJ spins music Sky Bar Hot Era party, Elemental Artistry Fire-Dancing The Station Pub and Grill Chubbrock Entertainment Surly Wench Pub Sanctuary Unicorn Sports Lounge Y Not Entertainment Wildcat House Top 40 dance mix Wooden Nickel DJ spins music Zen Rock DJ Kidd Kutz

COMEDY Laffs Comedy Caffé Freddy Charles

GOT ANY PLANS FOR NEW YEAR’S?

SAT DEC 15 LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Dennis Reed The Bashful Bandit Live music The Bone-In Steakhouse Bobby Wilson Boondocks Lounge The Coolers CD-release party CafĂŠ PassĂŠ Country Saturdays Cascade Lounge George Howard Cheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Lounge Live music Chicago Bar Neon Prophet Club Congress The Great Cover Up, The Sword, Gypsyhawk, American Sharks La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar Stone Broke Coltâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Taste of Texas Steakhouse Live music Cow Pony Bar and Grill DJ spins music Cushing Street Restaurant and Bar Live music Dakota Cafe and Catering Co. Howard Wooten Delectables Restaurant and Catering Stefan George Desert Diamond Casino Monsoon Nightclub Angel Norteno Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bayou Cajun Cookinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Melody Louise El Charro CafĂŠ Sahuarita Live salsa band El MezĂłn del Cobre Mariachi Azteca El Parador Descarga, Salsarengue, Tito y Su Nuevo Son Enoteca Pizzeria Wine Bar Phil Borzillo Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s E. Golf Links Live music La Fuente Mariachi Estrellas de la Fuente Gold Live music Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live Latin music Hacienda del Sol Freddy Vesely The Hideout Los Bandidos The Hut SKITN Irish Pub Arizona Bay Outriders Jasper Neighborhood Restaurant and Bar Corey Spector Las Cazuelitas Event Center Mariachis Liâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;l Abnerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Steakhouse Arizona Dance Hands Lookout Bar and Grille at Westward Look Resort Live acoustic Maverick Flipside McMahonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Prime Steakhouse Lounge: Daniel â&#x20AC;&#x153;Slyâ&#x20AC;?

Slipetsky Mint Cocktails Live music Monterey Court Studio Galleries and CafĂŠ The Railbirdz Mr. Headâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Art Gallery and Bar The Bennu New Moon Tucson Too Much Information Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Malleyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Live music Old Pueblo Grille Jazz Jam with Pete Swan Trio Oracle Inn Wild Ride Band Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Shaughnessyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Live pianist and singer Paradiso Bar and Lounge Boomer La Parrilla Suiza Mariachi music Rialto Theatre The Great Cover Up Ricâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cafe/Restaurant Live music Riverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Edge Lounge Vent The Rock Blood on the Dance Floor With Jefferey Star, Davey Suicide, New Years Day Sheraton Hotel and Suites Tucson Jazz Institute Sky Bar Live music The Skybox Restaurant and Sports Bar Live music Stadium Grill Live music The Steakout Restaurant and Saloon House of Stone Sullivanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Steak House The Bishop/Nelly Duo Surly Wench Pub The Furys, Sons of Providence Tanque Verde Ranch Live music Tanque Verde Swap Meet Live music Whiskey Tango Live music Wisdomâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s CafĂŠ Bill Manzanedo

Have you seen these people?

Use the Tucson Weekly mobile website to ďŹ nd all the info you need! Happy Hours, Movies, Events, Best of Tucson: Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all there.

m.tucsonweekly.com

Or Maybe these people?

Territorial Newspapers, the publishers of Inside Tucson Business needs your help!

Our award-winning business journal is seeking a dynamic sales professional that is committed to driving new business and servicing existing clients. t *G ZPV BSF TPNFPOF XIP JT TFMG NPUJWBUFE BOE IJHI FOFSHZ XJUI B DPNQFUJUJWF ESJWF UP BDIJFWF BOE TVDDFFE XF E MJLF UP IFBS GSPN ZPV t 5IJT QPTJUJPO JT BO PVUTJEF TBMFT QPTJUJPO BOE SFRVJSFT B WBMJE ESJWFS T MJDFOTF BOE B HPPE ESJWJOH SFDPSE t 5FSSJUPSJBM /FXTQBQFST PòFST DPNQFUJUJWF QBZ BOE B DPNQSFIFOTJWF CFOFÜUT QBDLBHF JODMVEJOH L

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Jill Aâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Hearn, Advertising Director P.O. Box 27087 Tucson, AZ 85726 0S FNBJM UP jahearn@azbiz.com /P QIPOF DBMMT QMFBTF %SVH GSFF XPSLQMBDF &0&

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC Best Western Royal Sun Inn and Suites Y-Not Karaoke Brats Circle S Saloon Karaoke with DJ BarryB The Depot Sports Bar Karaoke with DJ Brandon Elbow Room Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Silverbell Amazing Star Karaoke Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s W. Ruthrauff Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pima The Grill at Quail Creek IBTâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Amazing Star Entertainment Jeffâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pub Kustom Karaoke Margarita Bay Midtown Bar and Grill Nevada Smithâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Old Father Inn Chubbrock Entertainment Royal Sun Inn and Suites Y Not Karaoke Stockmenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Lounge Terry and Zekeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

DANCE/DJ The Auld Dubliner DJ spins music Bedroxx DJ spins music Brodieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Tavern Latino Night Casa Vicente Restaurante EspaĂąol Flamenco guitar and dance show La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar DJ Herm Desert Diamond Casino Monsoon Nightclub Noches Caliente CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE

DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

TuCsONWEEKLY

59

SAT DEC 15

TRIVIA/PUB QUIZ

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 59

Desert Diamond Casino Sports Bar Fiesta DJs: Country Tejano night Driftwood Bar ’90s R&B with DJ Qloud Nyne El Charro Café on Broadway DJ Soo Latin mix El Parador Salsa-dance lessons with Jeannie Tucker Famous Sam’s Valencia DJ spins music Gentle Ben’s Brewing Company DJ spins music IBT’s DJ spins music Mescal Bar and Grill DJ Tomtom Music Box DJ Lluvia On a Roll DJ Aspen Pearson’s Pub DJ Wild Wes Rusty’s Family Restaurant and Sports Grille DJ Obi Wan Kenobi Sam Hughes Place Championship Dining DJ spins music Sapphire Lounge DJ 64, DJ Phil Sinbad’s Fine Mediterranean Cuisine Belly dancing with Emma Jeffries and friends Sir Veza’s Taco Garage Wetmore DJ Du Solar Culture Milonga, DJ Joanne Canelli Wildcat House Tejano dance mix Wooden Nickel DJ spins music Zen Rock DJ Kidd Kutz

COMEDY Laffs Comedy Caffé Freddy Charles

SUN DEC 16 LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Dennis Reed Armitage Wine Lounge and Café Ryanhood The Auld Dubliner Irish jam session Azul Restaurant Lounge Live piano music The Bashful Bandit Sunday Jam with the Deacon Boondocks Lounge Last Call Girls Chicago Bar Reggae Sundays La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar Catfish and Weezie Dakota Cafe and Catering Co. Howard Wooten Driftwood Bar Acoustic rock La Fuente Mariachi Estrellas de la Fuente Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live Latin music Hacienda del Sol Freddy Vesely Las Cazuelitas Event Center Live music Lotus Garden Restaurant Melody Louise McMahon’s Prime Steakhouse Lounge: David Prouty Old Pueblo Grille Jazz Jam with Pete Swan Trio O’Shaughnessy’s Live pianist and singer Raging Sage Coffee Roasters Paul Oman Shooters Steakhouse and Saloon The Titan Valley Warheads Shooters Steakhouse and Saloon Live music Sullivan’s Steak House Howard and Loud

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC

M Y NITE 6:30-11P SUNDAY – FAMIL 2 KARAOKE TUESDAY – 8PM-1M-12 KARAOKE WEDNESDAY – 8P KARAOKE AM FRIDAY – 9PM-1 AM KARAOKE -1 SATURDAY – 9PM

NDAY / 100- 5"#-&4 ON SU %3*/, 41&$*"-4 t 01& : LATE NITE SPECIALS OM 11PM TO CLOSE $1 DOMESTIC MUGS FR

The Bashful Bandit Y-Not Karaoke Club Congress Club Karaoke Cow Pony Bar and Grill Diablos Sports Bar and Grill Elbow Room Open mic Famous Sam’s W. Ruthrauff Family karaoke The Hideout IBT’s Amazing Star Entertainment Margarita Bay Mint Cocktails Y Not Karaoke Pappy’s Diner Putney’s Karaoke with DJ Soup River’s Edge Lounge Karaoke with KJ David RJ’s Replays Sports Pub and Grub YNot Productions Karaoke Salty Dawg II Tucson’s Most Wanted Entertainment with KJ Sean Shooters Steakhouse and Saloon The Skybox Restaurant and Sports Bar Stockmen’s Lounge Whiskey Tango Wooden Nickel Woody’s World Famous Golden Nugget

DANCE/DJ IBT’s DJ spins music Kon Tiki DJ Century Outlaw Saloon Singing, Drumming DJ Bob Kay plays oldies Ra Sushi Bar Restaurant DJs spin music Shot in the Dark Café DJ Artice Power Ballad Sundays

2480 W. Ruthrauff Rd. (520) 292-0492 60 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

COMEDY The Parish Local comedians

Fox and Hound Smokehouse and Tavern Team Trivia with DJ Joker The Hut Geeks Who Drink

NINE QUESTIONS Kris LaFleur

MON DEC 17 LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Dennis Reed Boondocks Lounge The Bryan Dean Trio Chicago Bar The Ronstadts Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live Latin music Hacienda del Sol Aaron Gilmartin Las Cazuelitas Event Center Live music McMahon’s Prime Steakhouse Lounge: David Prouty Sullivan’s Steak House Live music

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC The Auld Dubliner Margarita Bay Mr. Head’s Art Gallery and Bar Cut-Throat Karaoke Music Box O’Malley’s Purgatory River’s Edge Lounge Karaoke with KJ David Shooters Steakhouse and Saloon Whiskey Tango Wooden Nickel

DANCE/DJ Club Congress DJ Sid the Kid IBT’s DJ spins music Surly Wench Pub Black Monday with DJs Matt McCoy

TRIVIA/PUB QUIZ Playground Bar and Lounge Geeks Who Drink Sky Bar Team trivia

TUE DEC 18

Kris LaFleur, 38, grew up in Tucson. By day, he works with local solar-power installer Technicians for Sustainability, helping to bring renewable energy and sustainable technologies into the Tucson community.

Eric Swedlund, mailbag@tucsonweekly.com

What was the first concert you ever saw?

I tried in vain to convince my parents to let me go see INXS on the Kick tour in 1988, when I was in the eighth-grade. For some reason, a year later, they had no problem letting me see Mötley Crüe at the Tucson Convention Center for the Dr. Feelgood tour.

What are you listening to these days?

On the iTunes recent playlist: Charlie Hunter, Martina Topley Bird, Heartless Bastards, Aretha Franklin, Morphine, Andrew Bird, Blitzen Trapper, Sea Wolf, Peter Bjorn and John, and Los Amigos Invisibles. But mostly I’m listening to great streaming stations like The Current (Minneapolis) and Radio Paradise (Chico, Calif.).

What was the first album you owned?

Either Men at Work’s Cargo or Huey Lewis and the News’ Sports. I still have both—but no turntable to play them on.

LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Bob Linesch Casa Vicente Restaurante Español Live classical guitar Chicago Bar Jive Bombers Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live mariachi music Hacienda del Sol Aaron Gilmartin Las Cazuelitas Event Center Live music Maverick Jack Bishop Band McMahon’s Prime Steakhouse Lounge: Susan Artemis Mr. Head’s Art Gallery and Bar The Jeff McKinney Band Plush My Jerusalem Rialto Theatre Bootsy Collins, Spirit Familia, Funky Bonz Sheraton Hotel and Suites Arizona Roadrunners Sky Bar Live jazz Stadium Grill Open jam Sullivan’s Steak House Live music Whiskey Tango Pozer

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC Beau Brummel Club Cactus Tune Entertainment with Fireman Bob Famous Sam’s W. Ruthrauff Jeff’s Pub Kustom Karaoke Margarita Bay Music Box Old Father Inn Chubbrock Entertainment Outlaw Saloon Chubbrock Entertainment Purgatory River’s Edge Lounge Karaoke with KJ David RJ’s Replays Sports Pub and Grub YNot Productions Karaoke Salty Dawg II Tucson’s Most Wanted Entertainment with KJ Sean Terry and Zeke’s

DANCE/DJ IBT’s DJ spins music Sam Hughes Place Championship Dining DJ spins music

What artist, genre or musical trend does everyone seem to love, but you just don’t get?

I’m pretty unaware of trends. Really. In a world where you can choose to listen to anything— from any era, anywhere—why waste time with music that doesn’t move you?

What musical act, current or defunct, would you most like to see perform live?

Talking Heads, circa 1980.

Musically speaking, what is your favorite guilty pleasure?

Nothing beats cleaning the house to KMFDM, at very high volume.

What song would you like to have played at your funeral?

Bob Dylan, “Mr. Tambourine Man.” “To dance beneath the diamond sky, with one hand waving free, silhouetted by the sea …”

What band or artist changed your life, and how?

The Rolling Stones. I found “Satisfaction,” “Get Off of My Cloud” and “Mother’s Little Helper” in my dad’s 45s collection when I was 6, and I was hooked for life.

TRIVIA/PUB QUIZ Applebees on Wetmore Applebees on Wetmore Club Congress Geeks Who Drink

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE

Figurative gun to your head, what is your favorite album of all time?

If you’re gonna get violent about it: the Rolling Stones, Let It Bleed.

LIVE

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 60

WED DEC 19

FRYHU XS

LIVE MUSIC

ELLIOTT

ZZ Top

ZZ TOP AVA AT CASINO DEL SOL Sunday, Dec. 9 The songs virtually have been coded into the DNA of music fans of a certain ageâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;â&#x20AC;&#x153;Sharp Dressed Man,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Jesus Just Left Chicago,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Gimme All Your Lovinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Legs,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Heard It on the X,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Waitinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; for the Busâ&#x20AC;? and, for Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sake, â&#x20AC;&#x153;La Grange.â&#x20AC;?

ZZ Top, that little band from Texas, now into its fifth decade, filled a show with all those and more (including a pair from the bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s new album, La Futura) Sunday night at AVA, the final night of the bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 2012 tour.

It almost goes without saying that guitarist Billy Gibbons, bassist Dusty Hill and drummer Frank Beard played together like a finely tuned hot-rod (even if the opening number, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I Thank You,â&#x20AC;? began a little sluggishly). Makes sense, too, since theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been together since 1970 without a personnel change. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Same three guys, same three chords,â&#x20AC;? Gibbons joked between songs.

The concert was a streamlined affair with few frills beyond a nonstop music-videoâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; combining old clips, new footage and live shotsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;displayed on five screens varying in size from big to gargantuan. Gibbons and Hill indulged only occasionally in their trademark synchronized choreography, briefly trotted out those furry white guitars and, during one break, traded their Future Farmers of America jackets in for more sparkly duds. Synthesizer embellishment, by the way, could be heard in the mix only rarely.

Otherwise, most of the showmanship was reserved for the music, with Gibbonsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; snarling leads welding Chicago- and Texas-style blues to catchy, polished pop-rock. The rockinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; was especially authoritative on the frenzied â&#x20AC;&#x153;Beer Drinkers and Hell Raisers,â&#x20AC;? the vaguely lascivious â&#x20AC;&#x153;Tube Snake Boogie,â&#x20AC;? the grimy blues of â&#x20AC;&#x153;My Headâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in Mississippiâ&#x20AC;? and the immortal â&#x20AC;&#x153;Tush,â&#x20AC;? wailed convincingly by Hill. The momentum stayed high throughout: When Gibbons unexpectedly had to switch guitars in the middle of one tune, Beard and Hill didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t miss a beat.

The band left the stage after less than 90 minutes. The audience never got to hear â&#x20AC;&#x153;Cheap Sunglasses,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Just Got Paid,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Pearl Necklace,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Got Me Under Pressureâ&#x20AC;? or â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m Bad, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m Nationwide.â&#x20AC;? Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a testament to the bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s deep catalog that it could leave out all those songs and still deliver a satisfying, entertaining concert.

WKH JUHDW

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RHYTHM & VIEWS Sergio Mendoza y la Orkesta

Grams and Krieger

Gary Clark Jr.

5

Blak and Blu

Mambo Mexicano!

SELF-RELEASED

WARNER BROS.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hard to imagine anyone who better embodies our homegrown desert spirit than these two multi-talented, blue-collar and seriously irreverent musicians. If you count their Fluffingtons project (and they do), this is their fifth release and quite possibly their most satisfying. A mix of five originals, four extremely diverse covers and one heartfelt traditional, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Lucky Old Son,â&#x20AC;? 5 not only showcases their obvious strengthsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;Kriegerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s slide guitar and their blues-oriented vocalsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;but also their deft touch as arrangers and producers.

While there are times when Kriegerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s acoustic slide and Gramsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; upright bass leave you feeling as if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re in an intimate living room or on a back porch, there are extended moments when the sense of ensemble-playing makes it hard to believe itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just the two of them. This is especially so on their Dylanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;Watchinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; the River Flow,â&#x20AC;? with the introduction of electric guitar; and most especially in bringing Nancy McCallionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;Stranger Nowâ&#x20AC;? to life with its mix of harmony vocals and complementary guitars.

Occasionally, they do bring in a ringer or two. John â&#x20AC;&#x153;Jukeâ&#x20AC;?

Loganâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s blues harp adds perfect accents on their reading of Sam Taylorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the Kind of Woman,â&#x20AC;? while Erik-Jan Overbeek (aka Mr. Boogie Woogie) on piano and Ralph Gilmore on drums show how well these guys can rock in their romp through Gramsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; â&#x20AC;&#x153;Hey! Boogie Woogie.â&#x20AC;? Perhaps best, and most unexpected, is their superb cover of Tom Waitsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; â&#x20AC;&#x153;Clap Hands,â&#x20AC;? a rendition Waits himself might enjoy.

Jim Lipson

Gary Clark Jr. is best when he unleashes some highintensity guitar, and while his major-label debut has plenty of those fireworks, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s also laden with the excesses of overproduction and indulgent genre hopscotch.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hard not to see Warner Bros.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; fingerprints on the record and wish that Clark would get a do-over for Blak and Blu. Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a multitalented and electrifying performer, one of the best guitarists of his generation. But instead of blossoming into the next Hendrix, heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s being steered toward the next Lenny Kravitz.

The album kicks off on a high note with â&#x20AC;&#x153;Ainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Messin â&#x20AC;&#x2122;Round,â&#x20AC;? a calling card of sorts that has Clark announcing â&#x20AC;&#x153;I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t believe in competition / Ainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t nobody else like me around.â&#x20AC;?

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bluesy rock, like Black Joe Lewis with a bit of Daptone soul thrown in. â&#x20AC;&#x153;When My Train Pulls Inâ&#x20AC;? follows with an electrifying guitar workout for half of the songâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s nearly eight minutes.

Here, Clark draws influence from Crazy Horse as much as the blues and pulls it off seamlessly. That great beginning makes â&#x20AC;&#x153;Blak and Bluâ&#x20AC;? such an unwelcome detour, a bit of psychedelic hip-hop that would sound much better leading its own EP. Clark needs more focus.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not that he canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t do neo soul and hip-hopâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;he clearly canâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;but those types of excursions become needless clutter on an otherwise terrific blues-rock album.

Clark is his own man, and Blak and Blue is a good album with some fantastic moments. But it could be better, and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s almost certainly because big-shot producers got in the way of Clarkâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s talents, polishing what shouldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve stayed raw and rough.

Eric Swedlund

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Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been waiting for this record for a few years now, since the popular local act announced it was working on its first studio release with Calexicoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Joey Burns, who co-produced with bandleader Mendoza.

Mendoza is the MVP, playing everything from keyboards and percussion to guitars and horns, and most of the musicians you see onstage with la Orkesta show up throughout, too. Burns and Calexicoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s John Convertino also are among the guest musicians. As are Nick Urata and Tom Hagerman of DeVotchKa, the Coloradobased band with which Mendoza has toured; they appear on the romantic, strings-laden album closer, â&#x20AC;&#x153;SueĂąos Amargos.â&#x20AC;?

Listeners expecting the bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s trademark punchy horn charts and robust Latin dance rhythms will not be disappointed, and the playing is as crisp as youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d imagine. But there is also a raw, edgy rock influence on the proceedings. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Traicionera,â&#x20AC;? for instance, gallops out like a turbocharged example of spaghetti Western, highlighted by Brian Lopezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s booming guitar leads.

The electric piano on â&#x20AC;&#x153;La Cucharitaâ&#x20AC;? has a â&#x20AC;&#x2122;70s jazz flavor, and â&#x20AC;&#x153;Toma Tresâ&#x20AC;? explodes like a brawling modernized big-band blowout, escorted

by Jimmy Smith-style organ playing. The lurching, carnivalesque â&#x20AC;&#x153;Orkesta y Sonidoâ&#x20AC;? features Camilo Lara, from Mexican Institute of Sound, and is way too short.

The great diversity of music on Mambo Mexicano!, as well as its thrilling performances, make this album a triumph and one of the best Tucson albums of the year.

Gene Armstrong

MEDICAL MJ A functioning medical-marijuana dispensary is finally open in Tucson

The Wait Is Over

BY J.M. SMITH, jsmith@tucsonweekly.com Broadway Boulevard. o here I sit in my usual seat on the But Shochat’s dispensary was open only in couch at the Epic Café, staring at my Dell computer screen and waiting. I spirit at first, because for the first week, it didn’t sell any meds. Instead of swinging open its kinda hoped that by now I wouldn’t be waitdoors to the eager ing, but the state, the masses the way they did slow-turning wheels of in Glendale, Southern justice and various Arizona Integrated forces of evil conspired opted to open for to make me wait along appointment-setting with all of you. We’re only. Tucson’s first diswaiting for a medical pensary had planned to marijuana dispensary, be selling meds before of course. this issue of the Weekly Up in Glendale, they went to press. In that aren’t couch-locked Kona Gold first week, Southern anymore. On Dec. 6, Arizona Integrated regArizona Organix Blue Dream istered about 200 opened to long lines Skywalker OG Kush patients, creating a figuafter Maricopa County rative line out the door Superior Court Judge Blueberry Yum Yum and around the block.

Michael Gordon Sour Diesel Averting a physical line slapped state Attorney Acapulco Gold around the block is one Generalissimo Tom reason the dispensary is Horne across the face Indica selling meds by with a legal pad on Nebula appointment only. which he had scribbled “They’d be lining up Columbian Gold “Arizona just does outside; they’d be hangwhat it wants.” Arizona Sensi Star ing around in the parkOrganix started selling White Rhino ing lot. We’re in a strip cannabis immediately mall, and we have after the judge’s ruling.

COMING SOON! neighbors, so we’re But in this neck of the respecting them,” desert, we wait.

Shochat said. The disFuckers. pensary also wanted to “Yes, various forces give its staff and its computer systems a dry did conspire to make us wait, but the waiting is almost over,” said Steven Shochat, operations run. Thus far, the patients seem to be skewing toward middle age. director for Southern Arizona Integrated “Our clientele seems to be mostly older folks, Therapies, a medical marijuana dispensary that quietly opened Dec. 1 on Kolb Road near from 40 to 50 and older,” Shochat said, a fact he

S

attributes to that age group’s hesitation to deal with collectives or unknown caregivers. He thinks older patients will be more comfortable with dispensaries.

Despite what the rumor mill said, inventory was never an issue; Southern Arizona Integrated did not delay opening because of a lack of meds.

It was ready to open last week with about six strains available. The meds are coming from caregivers’ excess inventory, because the dispensary’s grow operation won’t be ready for about four months. Until then, the dispensary will rely on the kindness of caregivers and patients with extra meds, Shochat said.

“That’s really the only option dispensaries have at this point,” he said.

Southern Arizona Integrated is an upscale affair that aims for a doctor’s-office vibe rather than a head shop’s. There will never be any smok-

ing paraphernalia for sale there, though the dispensary plans to advise patients on various delivery methods, including vaporizers and edibles.

“Smoking is antithetical to wellness, so we won’t be promoting smoking,” Shochat said.

So with the Fourth Avenue Street Fair streaming past person by person on this fine Friday afternoon, I wait. I wait for the will of the voters to finally be reality, not 100 miles away in the Great Strip Mall to our north, but right here in the Old Pueblo. I wait for a door to swing open on a place I can review for you (stay tuned). I wait for the forces of evil to abate, so we can have our cannabis and smoke it, too.

Fuckers.

To make an appointment to get meds from Arizona Integrated, call 886-1003, or go to www.sazitherapies.com.

Medical Marijuana Evaluations $99 Dr. Heather Moroso NMD morosomedicalcenter.com Naturopathy - Acupuncture Medical Marijuana Evaluations

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TuCsONWEEKLY

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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

By Rob Brezsny. Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s EXPANDED WEEKLY HOROSCOPE 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700 $1.99 per minute. 18 and over. Touchtone phone required.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Can you manage to be both highly alert and deeply relaxed? Could you be wildly curious and yet also serenely reflective? Can you imagine yourself being extra hungry to crack life’s secrets but also at peace with your destiny exactly the way it is? If you can honestly answer yes to those questions, you’ll get a lot of help in the coming week.

The universe may even seem to be conspiring to educate you and heal you. You will receive a steady flow of clues about how to get closer to living your dreams.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In the coming week, you would be wise to deal with your vulnerability, your fallibility and your own personal share of the world’s darkness. If you refuse to do that, either out of laziness or fear, I’m worried that you will reinforce a status quo that needs to be overthrown.

You may end up rationalizing your mistakes, clinging to false pride, and running away from challenges that could make you smarter and stronger. Don’t do that, Taurus! Be brave. Be willing to see what’s difficult to see. There will be big rewards if you choose to explore the weaker and less mature parts of your personality.

one fire ant.) Maybe their example could inspire you, Cancerian. Is there any pest you could develop a more playful and festive relationship with? Could you possibly turn into the equivalent of a Fire Ant Whisperer?

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): While reading William Kittredge’s book The Nature of Generosity, I learned about the oldest known sentence written in ancient Greek. It was inscribed on a wine jug that dates back to 740 B.C. Translated into English, it says, “Who now of all dancers sports most playfully?” Another possible translation is “Which of these dancers plays most delicately?” I’d love to make something like that be your mantra in the coming week, Leo. The time is right for you to do more dancing and playing and sporting than usual—and to seek out companions who’d like to help you achieve record-breaking levels of those recreational activities.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In the 1968 Olympics, Bob Beamon broke the world record for the long jump. His leap was so far beyond the previous mark that the optical device designed to calculate it didn’t work. Officials had to resort to an old-fashioned measuring tape. After that, the word “Beamonesque” came to signify a feat that vastly outstripped all previous efforts. According to my analysis, you Geminis will have an excellent chance to be Beamonesque in 2013. I expect that you will at least surpass your own peak levels of accomplishment. If you have not yet launched your ascent, get started now.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): In the movie Groundhog Day, Bill Murray plays a man who gets trapped in a timeloop. Over and over again, he experiences the same 24 hours. When he wakes up each morning, it’s still Feb. 2. At first it drives him crazy, pushing him to the verge of suicide. But eventually he decides to use his time wisely. He becomes a skilled pianist and a fluent French-speaker. He does good deeds and saves people’s lives. He even learns what he needs to do to win the heart of the woman he desires. This transformation turns out to be the key to gaining his freedom. Near the end of the film, he escapes to Feb. 3. A comparable opportunity is looming for you, Virgo. You have a chance to break a spell you’ve been under or slip away from a rut you’ve been in. Generosity may play a major role.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): The fire ants that invaded the southern U.S. back in the 1930s are an annoyance. They swarm and bite and sting. The venom they inject makes their victims feel like they’ve been burned. Two communities have decided to make the best of the situation. Auburn, Georgia and Marshall, Texas, both stage annual Fire Ant Festivals, with events like the Fire Ant Call, the Fire Ant Round-Up, and the Fire Ant Chili Cook-Off. (To win the latter, your dish must contain at least

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Events in the immediate future may have resemblances to reading a boring book that’s packed with highly useful information. You might feel that there’s a disjunction between the critical clues you need to gather and the ho-hum style in which they are offered.

It’s OK to be a bit disgruntled by this problem as long as you promise to remain alert for the partially disguised goodies.

Don’t fall asleep in the middle of the unspectacular lesson.

64 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “Instinct tells us that sharks are more deadly than delicious fatty foods,” writes Jason Daley in Discover magazine. But “instinct is wrong,” he adds. In fact, eating food that tastes good but is actually bad for us is a far greater threat than shark bites. That’s just one example of how our uneducated urges can sometimes lead us astray. I invite you to keep this possibility in mind during the coming week, Scorpio. It’s by no means certain that you will be misled by your natural inclinations, but it is crucial that you monitor them with acute discernment.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): For the last six decades of his life, Pablo Picasso created art that was adventurous and experimental. He didn’t invent abstract painting, but he was instrumental in popularizing it. And yet in his early years he was a master of realism, and had an impressive ability to capture the nuances of human anatomy. Commenting on Picasso’s evolution, travel writer Rick Steves says that when he was young, “he learned the rules he would later so skillfully break.” I suspect you’re in a phase

of your own development when you could profit from doing the same thing. So I ask you, Sagittarius: What are the rules that are so ripe for you to bend and twist as you graduate to a more mature level of self-expression?

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Through some cosmic intervention, a sad or bad or mad story will get tweaked prior to the final turn of the plot. Just as you’re getting ready to nurse your regrets, an X-factor or wild card will appear, transforming the meaning of a series of puzzling events.

This may not generate a perfectly happy ending, but it will at least result in an interesting and redemptive climax. What is the precise nature of that X-factor or wild card? Perhaps a big secret will be revealed or some missing evidence will arrive or a mental block will crumble. And it’s likely that you will have an epiphany abut how valuable your problem has actually been.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Be honest.

Have you had any of the following symptoms? 1. Lack of interest in trivial matters and a yearning for big, holy mysteries.

2. Unfamiliar but interesting impulses

rising up in you and demanding consideration. 3. Fresh insights into people and situations you’ve known a long time. 4.

An altered sense of the flow of time. 5.

Out-of-the-blue recall of long-forgotten memories. If you haven’t experienced any of the above, Aquarius, I must be totally off in my analysis and this horoscope isn’t for you. But if you’ve had even two of these symptoms, you are on schedule to get what those of us in the consciousness industry call a “religious experience.”

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): You just might be able to teach a statue to talk this week—or at least coax a useful message out of a stone-like person. You could also probably extract a delicious clue from out of the darkness or wrangle a tricky blessing from an adversary or find a small treasure hidden in a big mess. In short, Pisces, you now have a knack for accessing beauty and truth in unexpected sources. You can see what everyone else is blind to and love what everyone else has given up on. You’re practically a superhero. Use your powers wisely, my friend.

Be benevolently unpredictable.

¡ASK A MEXICAN!

BY GUSTAVO ARELLANO, themexican@askamexican.net net Dear Readers: Behold your favorite Mexican’s annual Christmas gift guide, where I give shoutouts to some of my favorite books that deserve your money this holiday season! And for once, I won’t recommend my books—¡Ask a Mexican!, Orange County: A Personal History, and Taco USA: How Mexican Food Conquered America— as gifts ... oh wait, I just did! In all honesty, while I always appreciate ustedes buying my libros and handing them out as regalos, the following items are just as chingones, if not more so.

Juan in a Hundred: The Representation of Latinos on Network News: This book won’t be published until early January, but preorder this masterful analysis of the paucity of Mexis on la tele, and the laughable representations that do make it through. Author Otto Santa Ana is a UCLA profe who boils down reams of data into a clear, well-written analysis that will have you rooting for the demise of the networks.

Anything by Cinco Puntos Press: You might’ve read a recent New York Times story decrying the lack of Latinos in children’s books.

And while you don’t necessarily need Mexis in a book to get Mexi kids reading (although I must admit, I always thought Tales of a FourthGrade Nothing was set on a Zapatista community in Chiapas), the Times article was wrong: There are a chingo of children’s and young-adult books featuring Mexis, and some of the best come from Cinco Puntos Press in El Paso. Run by my amigo Bobby Bird, one of the most Mexican gabachos you’ll ever meet, Cinco Punto’s books are wonderfully illustrated, hilarious—and they also sell great non-fiction for adults. Check them out at www.cincopuntos. com.

Anything by Lalo Alcaraz and Sam Quinones: I plug these guys ever year for a reason—not only are they amigos and mentors, but they’re the titans of their respective fields.

Alcaraz, of course, draws awesome cartoons, but this year also saw the advent of his pocho.com, what The Onion would be if it were Chicano and funny (recent story: “Realization: Man watches telenovelas for boobs, not to learn Spanish”). And Los Angeles Times reporter Quinones just happens to be one of the best narrative reporters in the country, with his books, True Tales From Another Mexico and

Antonio’s Gun and Delfino’s Dream: True Tales of Mexican Migration, the best books on Mexico since Insurgent Mexico—and you should buy that one, también!

Tex(t)-Mex: Seductive Hallucinations of the Mexican in America: Another annual plug because it deserves it, this scabrous take on Mexicans in the American imagination is penned by the eternally brilliant, eternally cochino William Nericcio. Rumor has it his next desmadre appears next year—grab that one, too.

Barrios to Burbs: The Making of the Mexican-American Middle Class: Shout-out to las mujeres! USC professor Jody Agius Vallejo penned a brilliant look into the Mexicans Americans don’t want to acknowledge: those who aren’t poor or cholos. She makes her fluid arguments with stats, great citations and amazing anecdotes—the opening scene in her book sounds like a Horace Greeley fable come to life mixed in with a Lupe Ontiveros fantasy and is written sans academia’s stultifying pedantry.

An Atlas of Historic New Mexico Maps, 15501941: This gorgeous coffee-table book published by the University of New Mexico Press presents pictures of all sorts of maps, along with brief histories of them and detailed close-ups. Perfect for the nerd in your family—and you know every Mexican family has at least two.

And remember folks: when you wrap up these books, make sure to stuff them in XBox 360 boxes to trick the recipient—it’s the Mexican way!

Ask the Mexican at themexican@askamexican. net; be his fan on Facebook; follow him on Twitter @gustavoarellano; or ask him a video question at youtube.com/askamexicano!

DECEMBER 13 - 19, 2012

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BY DAN SAVAGE, mail@savagelove.net

At a dinner party, a straight man put a question to my boyfriend and me. He assumed that we, being gay men, would have an answer for him. We did not, Dan, and so we turn to you: What happens to one if one has to fart while one is wearing a butt plug?

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If one is wearing a butt plug (â&#x20AC;&#x153;wear: to carry or to have on the body or about the person as a covering, ornament, or the likeâ&#x20AC;?), GASSYASS, then one may pass gas, silently or noisily, as one is wont to do, because a butt plug worn as a hat or a brooch or an epauletâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;that is, a butt plug worn on the bodyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;presents no impediment. But if one has fully inserted the bulbous end of the butt plug into oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s rectal cavity, and oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sphincter muscles are gripping the neck of the butt plug, as they are wont to do, thereby ensuring that the bulbous end remains lodged in the rectal cavity while the flared base remains outside of the rectal cavity (one could, if one wished to be pedantic, argue that one wears the flared base of the butt plug against oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s anus), what would then happen if one attempted to pass gas? The force of the gas would either dislodge oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s butt plug, sending it flying across oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s room, or, if oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s butt plug failed to dislodge and take flight, cause one to simply explode.

66 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

Rhymes With Larry Craig?

Yes.

I had a conversation with a friend who is an emergency-room physician. He told me about removing somethingâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t remember whatâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;from a gentlemanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ass. My immediate response was to ask whether he had the flared-base talk with the gentleman after the fact. His response? â&#x20AC;&#x153;What are you talking about?â&#x20AC;? I explained that if the gentleman had used a butt toy with a flared base, he wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have been in the circumstances that brought him to the hospital. He had never thought of that and thanked me for the advice. My partner is a physician and has treated patients with anal â&#x20AC;&#x153;encumbrances.â&#x20AC;? He gives the flared-base advice to anyone who seems like they might benefit from itâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;but he tells me this isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t something they go over in med school. This shocks me, because it seems like a topic where a little education could do a lot of good. You should use your column to bring this to the attention of medical school administrators.

Conscience Cleared

Just My Thoughts

I am sharing your letter, CC, in the hopes that doctors all over the world read it and promptly incorporate your â&#x20AC;&#x153;flared-baseâ&#x20AC;? advice into their practice. If they donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t, well, then we will just have to conclude that flared-base advice isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t given to patients by doctorsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;ER or otherwiseâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;because doctors secretly enjoy digging various foreign objects out of the variable rectums of various gentlemen.

I like your model, JMT, but it has to be said: At a certain point, endless Tumblr-enabled debates about sexual identity, gender identity, sexual orientation and sexual interests take on the flavor of those how-many-angels-can-dance-on-the-headof-a-pin debates that obsessed theologians in the Middle Ages.

For the record: Each of us is freeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and remains freeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;to identify however we wish and to apply the labels â&#x20AC;&#x153;identityâ&#x20AC;? and/or â&#x20AC;&#x153;orientationâ&#x20AC;? however we please. If a particular person isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t trying to take anything away from you, then the fact that the person holds slightly differing views on identity or orientation, or the meanings of those words, or just how many angels can dance on the head of a pin, well, it really isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t an enormous fucking deal, is it? And, in my opinion, those who spend their time debating, classifying, and unpacking sex and identity run a very real risk of disappearing up their own ass in a puff of santorum. Which is my way of sayingâ&#x20AC;Ś No, I wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be giving a column over to angry letters from buttsore people who feel that D/s is their sexual orientation, despite being told that I must, because last week, I suggested that, from my point of view, D/s is a sexual identity, not an orientation, and I gave a column to angry poly folks so itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s only fair and blah blah blah.

Bisexually Oriented Nervously Experiencing Reversal

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I was on a layover in San Francisco. My attractive, bearish, platonic, straight male co-worker would like to know if it is weird that a guy complimented his shoes while at the urinal in the SFO bathroom.

As I was reading the letters in the last Savage Love, it occurred to me that the debate over polyamory as a â&#x20AC;&#x153;sexual orientationâ&#x20AC;? is primarily one of definitions.

Some folks who are poly see that as just as â&#x20AC;&#x153;coreâ&#x20AC;? to their nature as their gender preference. Therefore, I propose the following framework. We all have a sexual identity composed of four components: 1. Our gender identity ranging from cis to trans.

2. Our sexual orientation ranging from homo to hetero.

3. Our sexual exclusivity ranging from purely monogamous to purely polyamorous.

4. Our sexual interest ranging from asexual to highly sexual.

In my view, these four components are equal in that they are all things that we are rather than things that we choose. While it is possible to choose a lifestyle that deviates from oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sexual identity, in all cases doing so entails stress, cognitive dissonance, and some degree of self-loathing. Like all conceptual frameworks, this one is not necessarily complete. It fails to include sexual interest in animals, particular age groups, or any of several hundred kinks, all of which are traits that seem to be more identity than choice. That said, I do think there is something unique and universally applicable in the four-component scheme, and I think that we should as a society set a goal of acceptance and nondiscrimination surrounding all aspects of sexual identity.

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m a 19-year-old bisexual male. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been in a two-year relationship with a girl who has a low sex drive, so we are in an open relationship, and I occasionally have sex with guys. I really liked the last guy I got with and enjoyed having sex with him a lot. The problem was, I couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get hard. Is the problem that Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m still trying to figure out who I am and what I want? Am I not as attracted to guys as I thought I was? Or could it be guilt, even though my girlfriend is OK with it?

Adult

it the first time it happens. (Maybe Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not bi!

Maybe it was guilt!) Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t waste your time, BONER. Sometimes a soft dick is just a soft dick.

If it keeps happening, well, then you may have a problem. But if you go on obsessing about an isolated incidentâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;perhaps brought on by nerves (you liked this guy, right?)â&#x20AC;&#x201D;you run the risk of creating a problem.

You say you â&#x20AC;&#x153;occasionally have sex with guys,â&#x20AC;?

BONER, which means this guy isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t your first.

Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just the first guyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;perhaps the first personâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; that you couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get hard with. Let me guess: This has never happened to you before. Of course it hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;tâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re 19. But it happens to every guy sooner or later, and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re much likelier to seek an explanation or attach some deeper meaning to

Find the Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage, and follow me @fakedansavage on Twitter.

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NEWS OF THE WEIRD

BY CHUCK SHEPHERD Send your Weird News to Chuck Shepherd, PO Box 18737, Tampa, Fla., 33679 weirdnews@earthlink.net or go to www.newsoftheweird.com

Yes, This Is Really How They Do It The Wolong Panda Training Base in Sichuan, China, released a series of photos to China Daily in October to mark the graduation from captivity, and move into the wild, of the 2-year-old Tao Tao. Sure enough, Tao Tao and his mother, Cao Cao, were shown frolicking in the woods, accompanied by trainers each dressed in full-length panda suits, including panda heads, as they appeared to demonstrate climbing trees and searching for food.

The Entrepreneurial Spirit The lost art of cuddling: (1) At the recently opened Soineya “cuddle cafe” in Tokyo, men buy hugging privileges (but no “sex” allowed!) with young women for from 20 minutes to 10 hours at prices (gratuity optional) ranging from the equivalents of $40 to $645, with surcharges for special services (e.g., foot massages, resting heads in each other’s laps). (2) The Deluxe Comfort Girlfriend Body Pillow, which began as a boutique-only niche product, recently became available at Amazon.com and Sears.com at around $25. The bolster-like, cuddling-enabled pillow is augmented with two strategically placed mounds and a snuggle-up arm hanging to the side. (There’s also an Original Soft and Comfy Boyfriend Pillow, without the mounds.)

• “You have wrinkles,” the inquiring customer was told, “and your left cheek is larger than your right,” explained “Tata,” the Bangkokborn woman who recently opened a salon in San Francisco to employ the supposedly traditional Thai art of face-slapping. Frown lines and droopy skin are curable with a 10-minute regimen of well-placed whacks across the cheek (and payment of the $350 fee), Tata told the Seattle Post-Intelligencer in October.

Masochists are warned that Tata deals in therapy, not punishment. “If you want someone to hit you, go on Craigslist.”

Cutting-Edge Science • Among the “Ig Nobel” prizes awarded to earnest academics in September by the Annals of Improbable Research was the one to Patrick Warren and colleagues who delved into excruciatingly detailed predictions (at the behest of a cosmetics firm) about how someone might ultimately look with a ponytail, based on hair characteristics. The team took into account the stiffness of the strands, the effects of gravity and the random curliness or waviness in the hair in a set formula to compute a “Rapunzel Number” for each head. Explaining his particularized work to reporters, Dr. Warren acknowledged (perhaps with underestimation), “I’ve been working on this for a long time.”

• A research team at Lund University in Sweden, led by neuroethologist Jochen Smolka, concluded that one reason dung beetles dance in circles on top of dung is to cool off, according to an October report on LiveScience.com. To arrive at their conclusion, the team went to the trouble of painting tiny 70 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

silicone “boots” on some beetles to protect them from the ambient heat experienced by a control group of beetles, and found that the booted beetles climbed atop the dung less frequently. Explained Smolka, “Like an air-conditioning unit, the moist (dung) is cooled by evaporati(on).”

Leading Economic Indicators • While the U.S. recently nearly elected a multimillionaire as president, Uruguay’s chief executive, Jose Mujica, declared his personal wealth in 2010 as the equivalent of about $1,800 and gives away 90 percent of his $12,000 monthly presidential salary in order to remain true to his political roots with the leftist guerrilla group Tupamaros. He has rejected the government-provided mansion and instead lives with his wife at her family’s farmhouse, where he helps work the land, according to a November BBC News profile from Montevideo. “I have to do (this),” he told a reporter, “because there are many Uruguayans who live with much less.”

• Financial advisers charge the big bucks because of their sophisticated understanding of money and markets—or maybe because they know how the stars align. A September Marketplace radio program highlighted the newsletters of “financial astrologers” Karen Starich and former Merrill Lynch stock trader Arch Crawford (who left the trading floor because, apparently, astrology is more lucrative). About 300 traders pay $237 a year to learn what Starich knows about Neptune and Saturn, and Crawford’s 2,000 subscribers (at least a few of which prefer receiving copies in unmarked wrappers) learned that any new business venture goes south when Mercury is in retrograde.

• The continuing decline of American manufacturing: A Drug Enforcement Administration agent told the Associated Press in October that factories in Mexico have recently been supplying American markets with especially potent and inexpensive methamphetamine. “These are sophisticated, hightech (businesses) … that are operating with extreme precision,” said agent Jim Shroba. The 90 percent-pure product offers “a faster, more intense and longer-lasting high.” Many Americans, meanwhile, continue to make small batches of inferior meth in 2-liter soda bottles.

Perspective In 2011 only 75 worldwide shark attacks on humans were reported, with only 12 fatal, yet researchers writing recently in the journal Conservation Biology found that about 60 percent of all media reporting about sharks emphasized just the serious dangers that human swimmers face. By contrast, only about 7 percent of the reports were focused on shark biology or ecology, though the sorry state of shark survival would seem more important, in that an estimated 26 million to 73 million sharks are killed annually from the harvesting of their fins.

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HOLIDAY RELAXATION Stop in for Holiday Specials. Enjoy some rest and relaxation. Terry (female) 369-9717

MASSAGE RELAX & LET GO 520-578-9600 MASSAGE Hallie’s back! Nurturing & firm, combining Swedish, Thai & Shiatsu techniques. Relaxing & invigorating. Hallie, CMT, 575-0507 TAKE A VACATION From stress with therapeutic massage. Relax your body, calm your mind, and soothe your spirit. Serina 520-615-6139 TIRED, RESTLESS? Take time out for yourself. Private home, Tucson & Grant area.

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Light Your Inner Fire Life Coaching for Women Call Terri 520-982-7091 Support Groups “NOTHING MATTERED MORE TO US THAN THE STRAW, PIPE, THE NEEDLE.” Cocaine Anonymous “We’re here & we’re free” www.caarizona.com 520-326-2211

Across 1 X-ed out?

12 Something turned under 15 What may be visualized via a bumper sticker?

16 Is for a few?

17 Supplement that might cause a stink 18 “When 2 ___ Love” (1988 Prince song) 19 Motivator for Manolete 20 Things you can bear 21 Suppressed 23 Mexican cacti 25 Dessert served in a bowl 26 2006 Newbery winner Lynne ___ Perkins 27 It replaced Apple’s Quadra line

28 Problem with tight shoes 31 Tennis’s Zvonareva and others 32 Spaghetti end?

33 Old Testament shepherd 34 Magnate who wrote “How to Be Rich” 35 Angel’s antithesis 36 Shouts in the ’hood 37 Mrs. Rajiv Gandhi 38 Without circumspection 39 Steal away 41 Ox 42 It’s metered 43 Where rails come together 47 Many stand-up lines 48 Drainer of most of Switzerland

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE

M I S T S I C H O R

M A N T U A R H E S U S

G A N D A L F S E X I S T S

O D D I T I E S A E S O P

T E A C U P A T A P R I C E

H A R T E S C H M O A K A

U N G U P R U N F O I N C O L S L P A G I W I D O W A N D R O R I L E G R O E S E N D B D S M A S A L N R O U L C A R R A R H E A D

O R L O N E A R P I E C E

N I A G A R A V A L E T E D

T R I T O N E V E R T S

S C E N T R O S I E

49 Shrinks’ grp.

50 Piece of fiction 51 Cry over spilled milk?

54 Loafer letters 55 Neurologist 56 Not automatic: Abbr.

57 Doesn’t run over Down 1 What hawks do 2 Follower of Franco?

3 “My Philosofy” poet 4 Ranch extension?

5 Palestinian group 6 Extent 7 Some Dutch wheels 8 Truth-in-lending figs.

9 Come together 10 Stored 11 Illusionist’s repertoire, in part 12 He “spoke” with horns and whistles 13 The Seneca Chief was the first to travel its full length 14 Untruthfulness 22 Onetime Soyuz destination 24 Foes of Frodo 25 Cake, in Cali 27 Little, in Lille 28 They’re often sliding for workers

1

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No. 1224

9

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46

22

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26 28

13

35

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53

Puzzle by Ned White

29 Party comment after “No thanks” 30 Common sock damage 31 Where the show must go on?

34 Mensch 35 First, second and third, but not fourth 37 Winter sport vehicles

45 Oaks Stakes setting 46 ___ fire 41 Annual Jalapeño (destructive Festival site 2008 blaze in Los Angeles) 43 Sewer parts 48 Take ___ 44 Modern-day (sample some) locale of the 52 Kung ___ place where the chicken Santa Maria ran 53 Be part of the aground in 1492 picture 38 Tempted 40 Cal-Nev-___

For answers, call 1-900-285-5656, $1.49 a minute; or, with a credit card, 1-800-814-5554.

Annual subscriptions are available for the best of Sunday crosswords from the last 50 years: 1-888-7-ACROSS. AT&T users: Text NYTX to 386 to download puzzles, or visit nytimes.com/mobilexword for more information.

Online subscriptions: Today’s puzzle and more than 2,000 past puzzles, nytimes.com/crosswords ($39.95 a year).

Share tips: nytimes.com/wordplay.

Crosswords for young solvers: nytimes.com/learning/xwords.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS! PAMPER YOURSELF! Get a relaxing massage today! Open to everyone, nice gentleman only please. West side, call for appointments.

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