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A Beginner’s Guide to Wedding Invitations
While most aspects of your wedding don’t follow a strict set of rules, your invitations do. However, keep in mind that knowing the rules and proper etiquette will also give you the tools and knowledge to bend them just a little to suit your needs. The presentation of information on your invitations can vary widely based on your style, colors and theme but all the basic pieces still need to be there.
Although subtle, your invitation is the first clue that your guests will get as to the formality of your wedding. A traditional letter press printed invitation with simple colors and addressed with calligraphy would be used for a wedding that is more formal in nature, whereas a square invitation with a playful font and bright colors would fit a more casual celebration. Regardless of design, many couples still use formal wording on their invitations. The lifetime commitment you’re making in front of your family and friends is a significant event, and most couples approach the ceremony with decorum.
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You should also be mindful of the costs associated with mailing non-standard sized envelopes. Post offices have machines that can only process certain envelope sizes, generally rectangles that are a minimum of 3.5 by 5 inches to a maximum of 6.125 by 11 inches. If your envelopes are a non-standard shape, for example square, you may end up paying a surcharge, usually around 20 cents per envelope, for hand-processing.
Keep in mind that the size of your guest list does not equal the number of invitations you will be sending out. Don’t make the mistake of ordering double, or even triple the number of invitations because you didn’t pay attention.
We know putting on a wedding is expensive, and sending invitations via email or another internet platform is basically free.
Most etiquette gurus still recommend paper wedding invitations. They tend to set the tone, establish expectations and specifically state who is invited to the wedding. This can be hard to do with electronic invitations.
There are also a large number of places you can purchase pre-designed invitations and budget.
Find your stationer at tbgvendors.com/invitations BUYING POSTAGE
Before purchasing stamps, take an assembled invitation to the post office and have it weighed. Inserts can add additional weight, or unusually shaped envelopes will require extra postage. Skipping this step could result in your invitations being returned for insufficient postage. This would throw your entire timeline off because the invitations would arrive late, plus you’d have to purchase new envelopes, re-address them and purchase the correct postage to send them print them at home to help stretch your
out again. Take our advice, and get your envelopes weighed.
Once you are sure you know how much it will cost in postage to mail your invitations, you can look in to purchasing wedding-themed stamps. It’s certainly not required, regular stamps will work, but adds a special touch to your envelopes!
The wording on your wedding invitation should reflect the formality, location, and hosts of your wedding. There are many different approaches-- simple, traditional, and even fun -- that allow you to express the type of event your guests can expect. Our advice is to come up with wording that makes sense to you and your partner, and causes minimal conflicts with your family.
THE HOST LINE: As the opening of your invitation, this is where you specify who is throwing the party.
INVITATION: This is where you let people know what is going on. “The honor of your presence” is only used if the ceremony is taking place in a house of worship. “The pleasure of your company” is used in all other venues.
Depending on how you wish to word the invitation, this line and the name line can switch.
NAMES: This lets your guests know who is getting married. Traditionally, the bride’s name goes first, and only the first and middle names are printed followed by the groom’s full name on a different line. But the rules are changing, and it is up to you what you put here. If you’re slightly embarrassed by your middle name, leave it off.
CEREMONY INFORMATION: This is the crucial part of the invitation. This lets your guests know the date, time and location of your wedding. It is useful to list the address of the venue, but sometimes this is excluded.
RECEPTION INFORMATION: If your reception is in the same location as your ceremony, your job is easy. Just include ‘Reception to Follow’ on your invitation. This lets your guests know they won’t have to drive anywhere following the ceremony.
However, if your ceremony and reception are at two different locations, you just need to add a couple extra words to your invitation, for example ‘Reception immediately following the ceremony,’ and include the name of the reception venue. We also recommend including an insert with directions to the venue, as well as providing your guests with maps from the ceremony to the reception venue at the ceremony.
Although there are many ways to create invitations, some things never change. For example, you should not include your gift registry information on your save the dates or invitations. Your family and wedding party can fill in any inquisitive guests, and you can also put in on your personal wedding website if you have one.
Speaking of wedding websites, it is perfectly acceptable to put the link on your save the dates, just not your invitations.
NAMES
THE HOST LINE
INVITATION
CEREMONY INFORMATION
RECEPTION INFORMATION
THE HOST LINE
INVITATION
NAMES
CEREMONY INFORMATION
RECEPTION INFORMATION
It may seem strange, but you’ll need two envelopes for your invitations. The outer envelope is for mailing purposes, and the inner envelope holds your invitation ensemble. The outer envelope is formally addressed only to those who are invited to attend the wedding, but the inner envelope is a bit less formal and includes just the first names of invited guests.
Just like for every other part of your wedding, there are some recommendations when dealing with the outer envelope:
Address each envelope by hand, and pay special attention to spelling, addresses and handwriting
Your guests’ names should be written out in full, using their titles such as “Mr.” and “Ms.”
Spell out all the words in the address
Spell out all house numbers that are less than 20
The return address should go on the back flap of the envelope, and can be handwritten, embossed or stamped
RSVPs and gifts will most likely be sent to the return address on the invitation envelope
Self-address the return envelope for the RSPV, don’t rely on your guests to do this for you. Always include a postage stamp with the reply card.
Modern brides are turning to online RSVP systems to capture the responses of their guests. Be mindful of the guests you are inviting and their level of comfort with technology and offer other ways for them to respond.
TIMING
Ideally, you should send your wedding invitations eight weeks before your wedding. This gives your guests plenty of time to clear their schedules and make travel arrangements. Request that RSVP’s be returned by two to three weeks before the wedding. This allows you to know how many guests to expect before crunch time!
If you’re having a destination wedding, give your guests more time to make arrangements by mailing invitations three months before the wedding.
If you’re sending out save the dates, mail them six to eight months before the wedding so that calendars can be marked and there will be no surprises when the actual invitations arrive. Just make sure that everyone who receives a save the date also receives an invitation.
As the RSVP’s start pouring in, you will want to have a system developed to keep track of them! Make sure to note how many guests confirm their attendance because your vendors will want an accurate headcount a few days before the wedding. If serving a plated meal, include food options on your RSVP cards so that guests can make their selection. Tracking the number of guests is especially important if you’re paying for cake or food per person.
Before you mail your invitations, count and number your guest list and assign each RSVP card a number accordingly. If a guest forgets to fill out the line for their name before returning it to you, the number on the card will help you know who has RSVP’d and who hasn’t! Be careful not to make the numbering too obvious.
If you want to make things easier for your guests, consider pre-addressing and stamping your RSVP cards!
If you’re still missing a few response cards at the deadline, go ahead and place some calls. It’s easy to get annoyed and frustrated at the lack of response, but don’t let that show. Politely ask if they’ll be attending, reminding them that the vendors need to know the number of guests by a certain date. Remember that it never fails that you will end up with an unexpected guest or two, so we recommend adding a few additional people to your head count if you can’t get in touch with everyone.
PLAN WITH THE TEXOMA BRIDE GUIDE
Feeling overwhelmed and out of place in the wedding space? In addition to comprehensive wedding planning guides and this magazine, we also provide wedding planning coaching services. We can help guide you through the process and give you tips and tricks to succeed on your big day.
