Clogging Melanson’s toilet since 1918
weather @ UBC
The Ubyssey’s annual photo supplement is here! Check out the talent on page 4.
U the ubyssey.ca
your student newspaper is published every monday and thursday • volume 91, number lvi • room 24, student union building • feedback@ubyssey.ca
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2010.04.15 t h u r s d a y
NEWS BRIEFS PhD student a finalist for conservation award Amanda Vincent, a professor at UBC, was recently announced as a finalist for the Indianapolis Prize. The prize is said to be the “world’s leading award for animal conservation.” Vincent was one of six finalists chosen from 29 nominees. The prize is $100,000 and the recipient is awarded the Lilly Medal. Vincent was nominated for her extensive seahorse and commercial trade research, as well as initiating a conservation project called Project Seahorse, and has been credited with putting seahorses on the global conservation agenda. Students chased with machete in alleged hate crime According to The Ottawa Citizen, Carleton University students Nick Bergamini and his roommate Mark Klibanov were attacked on April 5 by a group of men wielding machetes. Bergamini said that he was leaving a bar downtown at around 1:45am when the men shouted they were Jews and Zionists. He said he responded to the shouts, and suddenly the two roommates were surrounded by about ten men. Bergamini was struck in the back of the head. The pair returned to the bar to escape. According to Bergamini, as the two were walking home later, a car drove up and a man shouted from the vehicle, “I f**king hit you, you Jew.” The passengers of the car got out, one of them wielding a machete, and proceeded to chase the roommates. Bergamini and Klibanov managed to get away. Bergamini is the VP Student Issues for Carleton’s student union, and is not Jewish but a well-known student supporter of Israel. He alleges that the attackers were Carleton students. Police are still investigating.
crime watch April 7 The complainant reported that while eating in the food court of the SUB, someone stole his wallet from his jacket.
ncaa or cis. who will ubc choose? mor e on page 8
April 7 Between 9 and 9:30pm, the complainant reported his backpack was stolen from the UBC Aquatic Centre. Police are still investigating. April 9 At 10:20pm, a suspicious male attempted to flag down the vehicle the complainant and her three friends were driving along East Mall and 16th Ave. When the females attempted to speak to the male through the crack in the window, he attempted to open the car door. The females then drove away. The male was described as Caucasian, 20 to 25 years old, with facial stubble and wearing a white hoodie. The females thought the male was also intoxicated. Police made patrols for the suspect, but were unable to locate him.
2 / u b y s s e y. c a / e v e n t s / 2 0 1 0 . 0 4 . 1 5 april 15, 2010 volume xci, no lvi editorial coordinating editor
Paul Bucci : coordinating@ubyssey.ca
news editor
Samantha Jung : news@ubyssey.ca
associate news editor
Sarah Chung : schung@ubyssey.ca
associate culture editors Jonny Wakefield & Kathy Yan Li : culture@ubyssey.ca
sports editor
Justin McElroy : sports@ubyssey.ca
ideas editor
Trevor Record : ideas@ubyssey.ca
photo editor
Gerald Deo : photos@ubyssey.ca
graphics assistant
Anthony Goertz : graphics@ubyssey.ca
production manager
Virginie Ménard : production@ubyssey.ca
copy editor
Katarina Grgic´ : copy@ubyssey.ca
multimedia editor
Tara Martellaro : multimedia@ubyssey.ca
contributing editor
Ashley Whillans : awhillans@ubyssey.ca Room 24, Student Union Building 6138 Student Union Boulevard Vancouver, BC V6T 1Z1 tel: 604.822.2301 web: www.ubyssey.ca e-mail: feedback@ubyssey.ca
business
events correction In Monday, April 11’s editorial, we said the head of UBC Equity contradicted AMS President Bijan Ahmadian’s belief that UBC could replicate the AMS Equity program. The official in question was an “Equity Advisor.” The Ubyssey regrets the error.
ongoing events grad surf trip to tofino • The
graduating class council is hosting a Graduation Trip to Vancouver Island. Celebrate the end of exams and your degree with us! Accommo dations, transportation and events including surfing, hiking, kayaking and lounging are all included. This trip is subsided for graduating students by the GCC. • May 4–7, contact ubcgradtrip@gmail.com for more info.
thursday, apr. 15
Room 23, Student Union Building advertising: 604.822.1654 business office: 604.822.6681 fax: 604.822.1658 e-mail: advertising@ubyssey.ca
cirque du soleil free talk and demonstration • Come meet
Chibwe Mweene : cmweene@ubyssey.ca
talent scout Marc-André Roy to learn more about life at Cirque du Soleil from a physical actor and a clown’s perspective. Get an insight from the audition process to the on-stage experience. • 12pm–1:30pm, Dorothy Somerset Studios.
legal
friday, apr. 16
business manager
Fernie Pereira : business@ubyssey.ca
ad traffic
Sabrina Marchand : advertising@ubyssey.ca
ad design
The Ubyssey is the official student newspaper of the University of British Columbia. It is published every Monday and Thursday by The Ubyssey Publications Society. We are an autonomous, democratically run student organization, and all students are encouraged to participate. Editorials are chosen and written by the Ubyssey staff. They are the expressed opinion of the staff, and do not necessarily reflect the views of The Ubyssey Publications Society or the University of British Columbia. All editorial content appearing in The Ubyssey is the property of The Ubyssey Publications Society. Stories, opinions, photographs and artwork contained herein cannot be reproduced without the expressed, written permission of The Ubyssey Publications Society. The Ubyssey is a founding member of Canadian University Press (CUP) and adheres to CUP’s guiding principles. Letters to the editor must be under 300 words. Please include your phone number, student number and signature (not for publication) as well as your year and faculty with all submissions. ID will be checked when submissions are dropped off at the editorial office of The Ubyssey; otherwise verification will be done by phone. “Perspectives” are opinion pieces over 300 words but under 750 words and are run according to space. “Freestyles” are opinion pieces written by Ubyssey staff members. Priority will be given to letters and perspectives over freestyles unless the latter is time sensitive. Opinion pieces will not be run until the identity of the writer has been verified. The Ubyssey reserves the right to edit submissions for length and clarity. All letters must be received by 12 noon the day before intended publication. Letters received after this point will be published in the following issue unless there is an urgent time restriction or other matter deemed relevant by the Ubyssey staff. It is agreed by all persons placing display or classified advertising that if the Ubyssey Publications Society fails to publish an advertisement or if an error in the ad occurs the liability of the UPS will not be greater than the price paid for the ad. The UPS shall not be responsible for slight changes or typographical errors that do not lessen the value or the impact of the ad.
put ting god to the test • Dr Hugh Ross of Reasons to Believe and Dr Rob Tarzwell of Café Inquiry will sit down together to debate the reasons or not to believe in God. They will
also debate whether science can be used to prove God’s existence. The debate will be moderated by David Berner. • 7pm, Room 2, Woodward Building, free admission.
sets after work, with friends, over a pomtini. • 5pm–7pm, Grand Luxe Hall, 303 E 8 th Ave, $10.
cirque du soleil auditions •
movent presents: around the block • The energy and excite-
Vancouver auditions for Cirque du Soleil will be held at UBC for actors, clowns, acrobats, mimes, etc. applying for Cirque shows around the world. • Runs until Apr. 17, 9am, Dorothy Somerset Studio, anyone interested must apply online at cirquedusoleil.com.
wednesday, apr. 21 Healing on the Spiritual Path The Key to Tomorrow’s Health • Dr Vogelsberger will present
a lecture about medically verifiable spiritual healing. Medically documented healing will be explained and healed individuals will share their experiences. Participants will be able to experience the healing energy for themselves. • 7p m – 9 p m, S U B Rooms 214/216, more info at brunogroening.org/english.
thursday, apr. 22 ¡CLAMOUR! featuring Forbidden Flutes • The new cock-
tails, DJ and contemporary music series, ¡CL AMOUR!, features Forbidden Flutes, the wildly imaginative duo of L aura Barron and Liesa Norman. Original works and arrangements of Imo gen Heap and Radiohead are paired with Canadian com poser Derek Charke’s “Raga Cha” and Steve Reich’s “Vermont Counterpoint” for 10+ flutes! Catch their eclectic
thursday, apr. 29
ment of New York inspires Day Helesic’s Around the Block, a full-length dance work reflecting the spirit of the city and the people who live there. Four dancers travel the streets of Manhattan in a desire to find connection within the chaos, in a physical essay of boldness and intensity. • Runs until May 1, 8pm, Scotiabank Dance Centre, 677 Davie St, $15. voice ov er mind f e s t i va l •
Western Front New Music kicks off their Voice Over Mind Festival, which responds to audiences’ growing appetite for unusual singers and “extreme” vocalists. Vancouver’s versatile vocalist Viviane Houle performs with Stefan Smulovitz’s elaborate sampling and improvising systems. Adam Basanta leads a solo expedition through fields of sound, intimate and distant to the listener’s ear. • 5pm–7pm, Grand Luxe Hall, 303 E 8th ave, $10.
international dance day celebration • From contempo -
rary to flamenco and salsa to hula hooping, Vancouver celebrates International Dance Day with a series of events which highlights the diversity of BC’s dance scene. Initiated in 1982 by UNESCO, International Dance Day is marked annually with events across Canada. The date commemorates the birthday of
Jean - Georges Noverre, re g arded as the founder of modern ballet. Each year The Dance Centre, BC’s resource centre for dance, presents events which celebrate the art form. • 12pm, Scotiabank Dance Centre, 677 Davie St, full schedule and info at thedancecentre.ca.
friday, apr. 30 indian cl assical music: anoushka shankar • Anoush-
ka Shankar has emerged as one of the leading figures in World Music today. She is deeply rooted in Indian classical music, having studied exclusively with her father, the legendary Ravi Shankar, and is now one of the foremost performers in that tradition. Caravan World Rythms in partnership with the Chan Centre presents Anoushka Shankar playing the sitar. • 8pm, Chan Centre, $36 – 46 at Ticketmaster, student discounts also available, more info at anoushkashankar.com.
saturday, may 8 orien t ik / p or t r a i t • In cel -
ebration of Asian Heritage Month of May across Canada, ERASGA Dance is pleased to announce the kick- off of its tenth Anniversary season with the remount and Canadian tour of acclaimed dance creation OrienTik/Portrait. Attend an opening gala fundraising event performance in support of Co.ERASGA and Vancouver’s ExplorASIAN Society. • 7:30pm, Freddy Wood Theatre, $28, purchase tickets at ticketstonight.ca or call at (604) 684-2787.
contributors There once was a king named Justin McElroy who ruled the land fairly with his queen Paul Bucci. Their children Samantha Jung, Trevor Record and Gerald Deo were well behaved and courteous. Royal advisors Trevor Record and Katarina Grgic were wise and worked with royal book keeper Virginie Menard. The king’s mages, Sarah Chung and Mairead Mackinnon, were sought after for their powers. Sir Anthony Goertz the badger slayer was loved by all. Court jester Mike Duncan always made the royal cooks Alice Hou, Liselle Law and Ashley Whillans laugh while they roasted boars in citronelle. Nicole Fisher, Kristen Harris and Danielle Zandbergen often came from the neighbouring kingdom to visit. Lord Jonny Wakefield loved to bring his valets Kasha Chang and Austin Holm everywhere to shine his frou-frou shoes. Olivia Fellows, Thomas Young, Olivia Dreisinger and John Chiang worked in the stables and knew all the palace gossip. Palace guards Andrew Houd and Keegan Bursaw were always trying to keep out Geoff Lister, the old gypsy woman.
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There’s only one issue of The Ubyssey left for this year! Send us your last minute events! virginie menard events@ubyssey.ca
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NEWS
AMS reluctantly approves Commerce fee
editor SAMANTHA JUNG » news@ubyssey.ca associate SARAH CHUNG » schung@ubyssey.ca
AMS Council approved the motion with majority abstains to ask the Board of Governors to increase Commerce undergraduate fees from $266 to $766 starting in Winter Session 2012/2013. With 11 for, 2 against and 20 abstentions, Commerce representatives supported the motion, saying that the decision was made by Commerce students through a fair referendum.
Former Science representative Tahara Bhate said she abstained because the referendum process was fair, and the AMS policy forces her to do so, but she was concerned over the precedent this motion sets for future student fee raises that may come too easy. —Sarah Chung
Hunting for a new Dean of Arts Candidates from Switzerland, Toronto and UBC Liselle Law Contributor “Anyone who’s going to be the new dean is going to realize that they have big shoes to fill because of Nancy Gallini,” expressed Helaine Boyd, the Arts undergraduate student representative on the President’s Advisory Committee (PAC). “Nancy is actually well known for her genuine enthusiasm towards students. I think students want to see that.” Dean of Arts Nancy Gallini’s term is coming to an end after a fruitful eight years, and the search for the next dean is underway. Candidates were sought from all around the world, and initially there were about 200 interested. The search has since been narrowed down to three candidates: Angela Esterhammer, professor of English Literature at the University of Zurich, Switzerland; Gage Averill, VP Academic and Dean at the University of Toronto, Mississauga; and internal candidate Angela Redish, professor of Economics at UBC. “The committee is asked to rank the candidates in order and to comment on whether or not they’re suitable,” said the PAC Chair and UBC VP Academic Dr
David Farrar, “and that ranking is then passed on to the president, who makes a recommendation to the Board of Governors.” The PAC consists of 12 voting members, which includes four elected and four appointed Arts faculty members, the dean of Science, an Arts staff member, a graduate student representative and an elected undergraduate student representative. As part of the selection process, each candidate has to participate in a three-day campaign that consists of a public forum, a meeting with the senior administration of the university, and a final interview by the PAC. At the end of each day, feedback will be gathered and discussed. Other than the expectation of a strong scholarly background, a significant criterion is the ability and willingness to raise funds for the faculty. “A big part of what deans do is raise resources and fundraising, and get involved in external activities,” Farrar said. “[The committee is] looking for somebody who’s very comfortable in an advocacy role, comfortable as an external representative for the Faculty of Arts and comfortable in working with donors and working with alumni and external members of the university.”
Ever ybody is looking for something different in the new dean. “It’s really important that the new dean has an ambitious vision for the Faculty of Arts,” said Boyd. “The dean will be expected to have student-focused culture.” “I expect the dean to be aware of issues pertaining to graduate studies,” said graduate student representative Sonnet L’Abbé. “The dean needs to understand where a PhD fits in the professional economy.” She also stressed the importance of research opportunities for graduate students. In addition to being a strong leader for the faculty, the dean would also have to be a fierce supporter of the university. He or she would have to sit on the Committee of Deans, which is one of the two senior decisionmaking bodies in the university. The committee works with the Board of Governors and Senate in bringing policies into effect and making decisions pertaining to the university. The new dean will start work on July 1. U
quote this
The full position profile for the dean of Arts can be found at vpacademic.ubc.ca.
Sonnet l’abbé graduate student representative on the pac
It’s really important that the new dean has an ambitious vision for the Faculty of Arts. The dean will be expected to have student-focused culture. helaine boyd undergrad student representative on the Pac
The dean needs to understand where a PhD fits in the professional economy.
Capturing UBC, one portrait at a time Alice Hou Contributor First-year Arts student Rabi Sun has dedicated himself to an initiative called Portraits of UBC, where he is amassing a database of students, staff and visitors of UBC. His mission is to get ten portraits of students, faculty or visitors per day that school is in session. The photos and people’s responses are posted on his blog, Portraits of UBC, and on Facebook. Besides satisfying his pure love for photography, Sun’s goal is to document the diversity and day-to-day appearance of UBC and meet new people. Although it sounds simple, Sun, who started Portraits of UBC in September 2009, soon learned that it is anything but. “[The project] goes rain or shine and the days where I’ve been soaked to the bone were pretty bad,” he said, noting that photography is impractical while holding an umbrella. “There are days where I really want to stop the project altogether, but the fact that I’ve told a number of people so far that I will be working on it until I graduate makes me feel that I have to finish it.” He occasionally receives comments about how someone finds a long-lost friend or how similar people actually are compared
the day-to-day things that UBC students do in addition to the pictures of students.” Sun credits a YouTube video called “Thousand Portraits” that featured 1000 portraits of people in London as his inspiration for the project. He hopes that the project gains popularity and that people see how similar we really are. Sun hopes that someone else will continue the project after he graduates in 2013. U
Rabi hopes Portraits creates a sense of community. courtesy of rabi sun
to strangers. Sun said that it is these people who make the project seem like it has purpose. “I love it when people get excited about getting their photo taken, or afterwards, we end up having a nice long conversation,” he said. Previous questions of the week have included “What is love?” and “What do you enjoy doing?” He’s noticed that the question of the week “makes a lot of different people actually seem very similar and that it somehow connects [them].” Although he occasionally experiences “slow days” when people don’t want to get their photos taken, he acknowledges that it is just part of the project.
“To be fair, I’m not sure I’d want to get my photo taken if I wasn’t into photography myself,” he said. Despite this, the response has been positive among those photographed. First-year student King-mong Chan said that although he was unaware of Sun’s project before being photographed, he is glad Sun gave him the opportunity to be a part of it. “It was nice to meet random UBC people and it builds a sense of community to talk with people that you never [knew],” he said, adding that the project gives him the feeling that everyone has something in common. However, he added, “I would have liked to see pictures of...
To find out more about Portraits of UBC, see Sun’s blog at ubcportraits.wordpress.com or search “Portraits of UBC” on Facebook.
quote this I love it when people get excited about getting their photo taken or we end up having a nice long conversation afterwards. rabi sun portraits of ubc
anthony goertz graphic
From the office to the classroom Mairead Mackinnon Contributor Wine, an ex-wife, horseback riding and football—there wasn’t much English Professor John Xiros Cooper wouldn’t discuss with The Ubyssey. Cooper won the 2009 Killam Research Prize, which he said he was “happy to have won, and the $5000 was nice.” The prize is a recognition of his overall academic research and publications. He has written four books, focusing mainly on modernism and poet T.S. Eliot. Finding a job that he loved to do wasn’t easy. After working at an insurance company in Montréal, Cooper realized that he strongly disliked office jobs. “[I would’ve] become an alcoholic or have commited suicide [if I’d stayed],” he joked. After that, Cooper worked for newspapers for five years, but didn’t like how he couldn’t go into detail and how editors would always shorten his stories. Taking the advice of his first wife, he left journalism to earn his Master’s at UBC. There he received his inspiration from his MA professor Keith Alldritt. “[He was] the father I never had, and he made all the difference in my life,” Cooper said. Cooper was UBC’s associate Dean of Arts in 2006. During his time as the associate dean, with help from Student Services, students developed a closer relationship with the faculty of Arts through events such as “Arts Last Lecture.” He said this is his biggest achievement, unlike his books and publications. One of Cooper’s favourite things to do is riding horses. His favourite play is Waiting for Godot and his favourite poem is “Don Juan” by Lord Byron. He also enjoys travel, where he said his favourite international destination is Venice. “I was not lucky enough to be born there, but I’d like to die there,” he said. A misconception about Cooper is that he used to be a jock. He played a lot of sports as a teenager, especially football. He was even recruited to a few American universities for football, but declined the offers. Cooper’s future goals include writing another book, hopefully retiring in five years and seeing his two children graduate. U
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photo supplement
Given that we opt for the steady click of shutters and the gentle pop of flashes over the sounds of words being captured on paper, photographers are not, understandably, wordy people. This year’s challenge was to embrace our nature and pair six-word captions with photos, in the vein of Hemingway’s shortest work: “for sale: baby shoes, never worn.” Thanks to everyone who entered, and congratulations to this year’s winners! –Gerald Deo, photo editor 2010
editor GERALD DEO » photos@ubyssey.ca
above (first place): He went trespassing. Traversed those depths. thomas young
If you have more freckles on your left cheek than our sports editor has on both of his smooth, milky arms, we want you to write for the culture section. We totally have a thing for freckles.
culture@ubyssey.ca
Give us your drawings for the last issue! Late art is better than never.
Community Contribution Award 2010
virginie menard | production@ubyssey.ca
significant contribution to developing and strengthening the sense of community on the UBC campus by: 1. Organizing or administrating an event or project, or 2. Promoting activism and awareness in an academic, cultural, politWe at The Ubyssey, the official stu- ical, recreational or social sphere. dent newspaper of UBC, feel that we should be doing our most to recogThe award is open to all returnnize and encourage activities and ing, full-time UBC students, graduevents that develop and strengthen ate, undergraduate and unclassified a sense of community on campus. in good standing with The Ubyssey At our 80th anniversary in 1998, we Publications Society. We will award established a $50,000 endowment one $3000 to a project for the school that will fund The Ubyssey Commu- year of 2009/2010. Decisions will be nity Contribution Award. This an- made in late September 2010, and nual award recognizes a return- the award will be disbursed to the ing UBC student who has made a
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cover letter by the nominator, either an individual or a group, briefly stating the nature of the contribution made, the individual being nominated, contact information of the nominator and the nominee and a letter (approximately 500 words in length) describing the contribution made and how the above four criteria have been met. Students are welcome to nominate themselves, but those doing so must attach a letter of support from another member of the campus community. The award will be judged by a committee chaired by a representative of UBC Student Financial Nominations should include a Assistance and Awards office and
successful candidates in early February 2011. Nominees for the award will be judged on: 1. The impact of the contribution made: the number of people involved or affected. 2. The extent of the contribution: the degree to which it strengthens the sense of community on campus. 3. The innovation of the contribution: preference will be given to those with a new contribution over the administration of an existing one. 4. The commitment of the individual to UBC as a community.
U theubyssey.ca members from various parts of the campus community. Completed nominations should reach The Ubyssey, room 23, SUB, no later than: Monday, September 15, 2010. For further information, please contact: Fernie Pereira Business Manager the ubyssey PH: (604) 822.6681 email: fpereira@interchange. ubc.ca
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Left (second place): I apologize
for my disobedient husband. olivia dreisinger
bottom left (third place): Two
tired friends taking a nap. keegan bursaw
right:
Man jumps, man soars, man falls. geoff lister
bottom right:
So close and yet so far. gerald deo
We only have one issue left! Send us your last minute thoughts. paul bucci | feedback@ubyssey.ca
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CULTURE
The Ubyssey covers block party: Follow @ubysseyculture for live Block Party updates Read more about the bands playing tomorrow Pick up our next issue to read our review!
associates JONNY WAKEFIELD & KATHY YAN LI » culture@ubyssey.ca
top bands @ acf The BareNaked Ladies Metric K-OS The Philosopher Kings Sam Roberts
Michael Duncan chills with Brian Sullivan at AMS Block Party 2008. Gerald Deo file photo/The Ubyssey
Reminiscing about Arts County Fair Mike Duncan Contributor 15,000 students, 500 kegs of beer, 5 bands, 5 DJs and a hangover until at least 5pm the next day. I have been at UBC long enough that I can tell people what Arts County Fair (ACF) used to be like. I had the chance to attend three ACFs before this UBC tradition was terminated. I remember that the cancellation announcement was met with shock. Protest Facebook groups were started, people were upset, the AUS took quite the media beating, but it didn’t matter; once this event had been cancelled, no UBC group would be able to build up the political capital needed to restart it. There will never be another ACF-scale event at UBC ever again.
The real question I get from students is about what they missed. How is it different from Block Party? And after two Block Parties, I can say that I have only noticed slight differences. There are no longer 15,000 drunk students in an arena—but during the last days of the ACF, attendance was dropping so drastically that that wasn’t happening anyways. There is no longer the great trek to get down to the party. This has caused an earlier start to the party, but also created a decreased concentration of students, who can do a lot of different things when already in the centre of campus. Other than that, it isn’t really different for me. I woke up at 9am on my first ACF day to realize that I was the only sober person on my f loor in residence. Now, I wake up at
7:30am off-campus so I can get to my friend’s beer and pancake breakfast at 8am. In my first year, I tried to find the Ski and Board party. Now, I know where it’s going to be and make sure that I go. I don’t even remember the music played because I was so excited to see my friends (and the alcohol hindered the memories). Now I know I am not going to pay attention to the music: I go because I know I am going to see all my friends. Yes, it is unfortunate that the largest party at UBC was cancelled. But the whole point of ACF was to give you a fun way to spend the last day of classes with your friends and to try to have the best time possible. You can still do that with the AMS Block Party. It is up to you. What will you make of your last day of classes? U
Top Bands @ Block Party The barenaked Ladies stars Tokyo Police Club The Roots Most serene republic
Fashion files | Adventures in DIY-Land Kristen Harris and Daniella Zandbergen Contributors One fine day, we decided to rid the world of a pair of hideous, black flared pants. Flares were cool maybe, say, ten years ago, but humans are such fickle creatures. To sport an incorrect pant leg width can be a dire mistake— this must be avoided at all costs. We took some creative liberties to correct this catastrophe, and rescued said pants from the landfill. We tried this—a little spontaneously—and it worked. Give it a go, and if you don’t have success, you will at least know what not to do.
Danielle Zandbergen Photo/The Ubyssey
Materials: • 1 pair of pants • Pins (50 or so) • 1 sewing Machine • 1 spool of thread to match the pant color • Chalk • 1 pair of scissors
First, try on the pants. Make sure they still fit, or this will be a fun but useless exercise. Take off the pants. Sexy times! Then turn the pants inside out. Line up the seams as best you can. From the knee down (assuming that the flare begins below the knee), draw a chalk line according to the width you would like. Make sure that the line you are drawing is more fabric than you really need to go around your ankle. Cut off excess fabric if you are confident. You can always fix it if you have too much. Next, take a ruler and make sure the two legs are pinned to the same width. Pin everything up the line. Be careful to put all
of the pins in the same direction to minimize the risk of spiking yourself. After you have deemed the pinning job to be acceptable, put the pants back on. Inside out. With the pins. This is not for the faint of heart. Make sure they fit well and that you can move around. If pins are falling out as you walk around, then it’s too tight. You can make modifications with the pins while the pants are still on you. Then take the pants off. Whip out a sewing machine. If you have no sewing background, discuss with the machine’s owner how to thread it. If the owner happens to be you, conversations with yourself may or may not be useful. Once the machine is threaded, sew about an inch away from the line of pins that you have created. Keep this line as straight as you can and be careful to take the pins out right before you get to them. Go back and forth (if you can figure out how to reverse the
sewing machine) a few times to reinforce the last few inches. Voila. Pants! The crowd goes wild! If it is not the desired fit, return to the beginning. Repeat. Or, give up, find some scissors and make cut-offs. U
Danielle Zandbergen Photo/The Ubyssey
What do fish bubbles do? Nicole Fisher Contributor Fiona Bayrock makes me giggle. This author also has a way with kids, as evident with her book Bubble Homes and Fish Farts, which has been nominated for the Christie Harris Illustrated Children’s Literature 2010 BC Book Prize. Bayrock understands how to get kids interested and then incorporates science into her work. Bubble Homes and Fish Farts is a non-fiction picture book about “the amazing ways animals use bubbles,” with a double page spread of Carolun Conahan’s beautiful watercolours and just a 100-word explanation for 16 animals’ use of bubbles. For Bayrock, writing children’s stories is both a science and an art. She graduated from UBC with a Commerce degree. After homeschooling her children, she discovered that educating her kids was easier when they were entertained. Her career as an author began by writing science articles for kids, and then illustrating children’s books. She compares writing 250 to 400 word children’s stories and articles to “writing executive summaries.” Her creative writing is fraught with logic, research and a strong understanding of her young audience. Charming and concise, her story doesn’t ask children for their patience. Bayrock says adults are forgiving in giving an author time to get to their point, but that is not the case with a young audience. She shares her tricks with other writers by posting articles on her website at fionabayrock.com, to help avoid “that tilted head, raised lip and eyebrow thing kids do with their faces when they haven’t got a clue what you’re talking about.” Bayrock’s career as a storyteller has provided her with the opportunity to teach children. When she is invited to schools, Bayrock reads a passage from her work, then helps students with their writing. Simple and encouraging, one of her lessons is the importance of drafting their work. “Sometimes the kids think there is something wrong with their writing skills when they are told to rewrite something.” Bayrock emphasizes that she rewrites her work at least 12 to 15 times, inspiring confidence in her audience—in addition to the giggles. Understanding how to effectively communicate with children is a valuable asset to parents, teachers, or anyone who has been asked to make a child eat their vegetables. While Bayrock teaches science to children, she reminds adults of the importance of engaging their audience with creativity. U
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ideas
You said it
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In response to “Editorial : AMS puts a price on safe t y [April 8, 2 010]” :
the president clearly has a hidden-agenda to cut student services. he already cut the equity program. and he wants to do it in an underhanded way too! the fact that it was an “in camera” meeting was to prevent students who cared about safewalk to attend and show their support for it.
Yes; Tim Chu would know a few things about hiding stuff from the rest of Council…
This doesn’t sound good for the safety of UBC students.But having a president who makes some controversial decisions may bring out more voters for the next election.
—Tim Chu [April 9]
—$$ [April 10]
—D. [April 10]
editor TREVOR RECORD » ideas@ubyssey.ca
too sexy Austin Holm & Kasha Chang toosexy@ubyssey.ca Dear Too Sexy,
Maria Cirstea graphic/the ubyssey
editorial SUB selection has been a success so far It’s two days into voting for the architects of the new SUB, and we have to say—this is working. Even though the AMS lost a lot of ground over the last year in the SUB negotiations process, the architect selection has gotten students actually engaged. Walking through the SUB, you can hear students talking to each other, debating the finer points of architecture, and becoming interested in the university’s campus plan. People are talking, and students feel empowered. There are students here who will actually see this SUB built (provided they take a year or two longer to graduate). We don’t say it often, but good job on this one, AMS. Even though this might not mean much practically, it means a lot emotionally —and sometimes that’s good enough. The university is particularly worried that students will be shown some pretty pictures of beautiful buildings and your wandering hearts will be swayed by the firm with the biggest buzz word (can anyone say, “Sustainability”?). B-Sull, POuillet and S-Toope—don’t be worried, the students can use the internet for research and we know that it’s all about process and function. So for those of you who haven’t yet voted and are wondering, how to pick an architect, here are some questions we ask: All of the architects can design pretty mock-ups, but do their end results work for our needs? Do they try to be fashionable at the expense of function? We know that they can say the word “sustainable,” but does it end up meaning anything? Do they have experience with buildings that have to fulfill the wide variety of social and practical uses that the SUB requires? Pick the architect you think will be able to create the most usable space. U
Toope may be an unelected mayor, but he’s benevolent If you’re one of the few students who check every single e-mail that UBC sends your way, you might have noticed one about President Stephen Toope yesterday. Having been hired for a five-year term on July 1, 2006, Toope’s tenure runs out in June 2011. There is, however, the distinct possibility that Toope, like the last two UBC presidents, will be reappointed for a second five-year term by the Board of Governors. A committee has been formed to review Toope’s leadership, and a recommendation will be made to the board on whether to keep him on. Should Toope continue to be our president? We certainly hope so. No leader is perfect, but in the past four years, the university has slowly begun to put more of an emphasis on teaching, has become less bureaucratic, and most importantly is willing to see students as partners in the evolution of UBC. The two presidents that preceded Toope, Martha Piper and David Strangway, were very good at increasing UBC’s international reputation, endowment and density of market housing. They weren’t very good at listening to students, making 100-level classes interesting, or creating the sort of dynamic campus community that only exists in glossy brochures. This has changed under Toope. The one thing that all student leaders acknowledge is that Toope listens to students, and legitimately cares about what they want this university to be. Under his term, future plans for University Boulevard have gone from condos and shopping malls to a new SUB, millions of dollars have been poured into new techniques of teaching, and UBC occasionally changes their minds on projects after they hear what students have to say. UBC still may be a bit of a shadowy oligarchy, and Stephen Toope may be the equivalent of an unelected mayor, but he’s a benevolent mayor. Students should support his reappointment. U
Help! I’ve been dating this girl for a few weeks, and so far everything has been great. We really get along, and we’ve had some pretty great sex...only… The other night, we were in the midst of coitus, when my girlfriend noticed my cat was watching us. Then, when I said, “It’s okay, he always watches us,” she got really upset, and asked me to throw my cat out of the room. Now, this girl is really nice, and we seem to have a real connection, but I love my cat. I’ve had him since I was 15, and he’s my best friend. And he likes to watch me have sex. What’s the big deal? It’s not like he gets on the bed or anything; he just likes to watch. He seems to find it interesting. He always has, and none of my previous girlfriends have ever had a problem with it...or maybe they just never noticed. What’s going on here, Too Sexy? Why is this girl being so weird about this? My cat isn’t hurting anybody, and it’s not that weird, is it? Is it?! Is my girlfriend just a cat-hater? Is my cat a pervert? Is anything about this strange, or is this something you just go through when you own pets and date?
like “Ooooh, who’s a good kitty?” So essentially, every time your girlfriend’s eyes wander off of your mid-coitus face and over to your cat, her subconscious is basically seeing a tiny, hairy baby that is really into watching you two fucking. No matter how much you may love that tiny, hairy baby, you’ve got to realize that to some people (read: most people) this is just a fundamentally non-sexy thing. My cat isn’t hurting anyone and it’s not that weird, is it? Well, that depends what you mean by weird. It doesn’t fly in the face of the laws of nature, so it’s not weird like that. But it is weird enough that there are probably groups on the internet dedicated specifically to being watched by cats while you have sex.
Hey Catwatch,
This is one of those special kinds of problems that only pet owners and parents really have to deal with. You’ve got a lot of questions here, so we’re going to have to take them one by one. Why is this girl being so weird? Studies have shown that people tend to see similarities between kitty, puppy and baby faces. This triggers a sort of maternal or paternal subconscious reaction that makes you say things
Is this something you just go through when you own pets and date? Yes, it’s just something you go through. Most people choose to go through the additional step of closing the damn door. U
Sorta sexy Trevor Record & Paul Bucci ideas@ubyssey.ca coordinating@ubyssey.ca
We’d like to answer this question with another question: If your cat caught you staring at her while she was fucking some stray tom, do you think she’d think you were a pervert? More to the point, if your girlfriend caught you watching cats
Catwatch, in case you don’t get what is heavily implied, kick out the damn cat next time. You gain nothing by allowing your cat to watch you make bedroom whale music. Your girlfriend obviously doesn’t like having sex with the cat there. Your cat is a dumb animal, and without the Owner Having Sex Show it will entertain itself by eating bugs or lying next to radiators. This seems like a no-brainer. We’re not sure why Kasha and Austin didn’t just come out and say that. This advice column is not just a soapbox to blindly push a sex-positive agenda. It’s acceptable to take the side of some one who has sex hangups at times. Catwatch, you are being an asshole, and we feel really bad for your girlfriend. This letter makes us think either you actually do get off on having your cat watch you have sex, or you’re one of those assholes who always needs to prove he is right no matter how petty the argument (so much he tries to enlist the aid of sex columnists in this case). Either way, it is fairly clear that you aren’t really taking your girlfriend’s emotions into consideration in the slightest. U
there are no direct quotes from the AMS President, and an opportunity was given to him to respond in neither this nor the subsequent issue, in which The Ubyssey effectively called him a liar. The Ubyssey could have at least asked him what the nature of his talks was, and what level of the administration he was in contact with. Thursday’s “You can’t represent...” reaches even higher plateaus of madness. The paper called the Safewalk debate a show-debate, but in the previous issue described the debate’s heated nature. You can’t have it both ways. I almost sympathize with the university and its being maligned over consultations (almost). Consultation does not mean that you have to do exactly what the consultees say (though whenever I talked through the potential cuts with people, there was always a consensus that some kinds of cuts
were necessary). There were extensive internal discussions within the AMS about these cuts, and each rep should have consulted their constituents in their own way. These decisions are being taken by the people who were elected for that job. This comes down to some people attacking the process when they don’t like the outcome. Saying AMS Communications policy would have been acceptable with broader consultation is disingenuous— The Ubyssey has condemned it on a number of occasions, in more benign circumstances. Why would this be different now? The Ubyssey’s coverage has been haphazard and scattershot, and even handed reporting has fallen to the desire to print sexy and inflammatory headlines. —Matt Naylor [Matt Naylor was an Arts councilor at the time the meeting in which Safewalk and Equity were cut.]
Is my girlfriend just a cat-hater? It’s possible, but unlikely. She probably just isn’t into being watched by lurking presences, be they man or cat. Ask yourself: if your best friend was a human, would you expect your girlfriend to be cool with him watching you uninvited? We think not. By way of further explanation, let us point out that Too Sexy loves Neil Patrick Harris, but either of us would be very upset to look up mid-banging and see him staring through a window at the sweaty jungle antics to which he was not invited. So it may be that your girlfriend is more of a pervert-cathater than a cat-hater. <ital>
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—Catwatch
fucking, would she think you were a pervert? You know the answers to these questions, Catwatch, and I will not insult you by preempting your judgement.
Is my cat a pervert?
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letter I take issue with The Ubyssey ’s editorials of late. You’ve claimed that it’s a bad thing that “Council puts a price on Safety.” Council has to put a price on safety. It’s their job. If there really was no price on safety, the AMS would hire bodyguards for every student. If anybody is criticizing the cuts, they should provide alternatives—where should the money come from? Would The Ubyssey prefer to cut the Clubs Benefit Fund, or the Insider Agenda, or eliminate External Relations? Even better, The Ubyssey might want to come out for a fee increase—it’d solve all these problems, and the AMS badly needs one. Beyond factual inaccuracies in the Equity coverage (the decision wasn’t “a unilateral decision made by the AMS executive,” nor could The Ubyssey know if the original motion passed “nearly unanimously,” as this was before recorded votes), <ital>
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SPORTS
Volleyball team honoured again The UBC women’s volleyball team was honoured with five different awards at the annual UBC Big Block Club Awards Tuesday night. Graduating senior Liz Cordonier won both the May Brown Award for graduating female athlete of the year and the Marilyn Pomfret Trophy for female athlete of the year. In additon, her squad was chosen as the du Vivier Team of the Year following a season that saw them go 25-0 and ended with a third straight CIS Championship. Dannie Richards and Mariah Bruinsma also won the Thunderbird Athletes Council award for leadership.
editor JUSTIN McELROY » sports@ubyssey.ca
T-Birds to stay in CIS—for now
University turning Danton’s life around
Second time a decision has been delayed Ashley Whillans awhillans@ubyssey.ca UBC will delay a decision on whether to join the NCAA—again. For many athletes and coaches at UBC, the summer is a time to reflect on the past season and plan for the upcoming year. But for the university, it will be a time to make decisions about whether to apply for membership in Division II of the National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA). “By the end of September we will have an idea of how hospitable our future in CIS might be,” said UBC VP Students Brian Sullivan. “I suspect by the end of September we will have a little more clarity about the process of moving us forward, getting to a decision point for December and June,” he said. It is the second time UBC has missed a self-imposed deadline on making a decision on whether to leave Canadian Inter-university Sport (CIS), which governs all university sport in Canada. With the exception of SFU, who joined the NCAA last year, all Canadian universities with varsity teams compete in the CIS. Exactly one year ago today, UBC President Stephen Toope told the Senate that UBC would delay a decision on whether to join the American association for a year, saying the university had several unresolved issues with joining the NCAA. In March 2009, the NCAA Division II Review Committee issued a 588-page report, which did not make a recommendation either way. It revealed that of the 537 people who filled out a survey on the issue, 52 per cent were against moving to the NCAA. With the CIS Annual General Meeting coming up in June, Director of UBC Athletics Bob Philip assured that UBC will retain membership in both Canada West and the CIS, committing for the next two years. However, whether or not they will apply for the NCAA is still undecided. One of the key factors UBC is taking into consideration in terms of the move to NCAA is the full-ride scholarship opportunities available, which often make playing in the US more appealing than playing in Canada for student athletes. Other issues include weak competition in the Canada West conference for many UBC teams, and the necessity of the university undergoing American accreditation if they were to join the NCAA. While there are proposed changes to the CIS scholarship program this year, including
Mike Danton in action for SMU. Cole Breiland Photo/The Argus Tony von Richter CUP Sports Bureau Chief
oker chen file illustration/the ubyssey
a f lexible scholarship model that would allow for limited full scholarships for key players, Philip does not believe these changes would affect UBC’s decision to stay in the CIS. “There are a number of factors that will go into UBC’s decision to go or not go into the NCAA that are not just the scholarship issue,” he said. “What I have seen in CIS in regards to the change in scholarship proposal, I would say that this would have no effect on [our decision]. You can argue that it is better than it was, I am not arguing that it isn’t, but it is not a significant change.” Philip argued that regardless of what the CIS does, it will not impact UBC’s decision. “[Our contemplation of the NCAA] is not an anti-CIS thing, it is more what’s the right thing to do for UBC Athletics in Vancouver,” he said.
“We didn’t go to the CIS and say, ‘if you don’t change we’re leaving.’ We never felt that the CIS was in a position to change... it is not about the CIS not doing its job, it’s about the CIS doing what it can do,” he said. Wit h two years of negotiations, meetings and discussions behind them, both Sullivan and Philip are aware that UBC needs to make a decision as soon as possible. “We need to settle this issue to be fair to perspective students, student athletes and coaches who are thinking of coming to UBC,” said Sullivan. Philip added, “This can’t continue on too much longer and we are all aware of that. Yet, I think having this interval to pause and to constructively work hard within the existing structure of CIS to try to get these improvements has been the wise thing to do.” U
THUNDER BAY (CUP) — He’s only played 19 games, and he’s already the most well-known university hockey player in Canada. Of course, Mike Danton’s fame comes not from his play in Canadian Interuniversity Sport, but the troubled life he led prior to enrolling at Saint Mary’s University in Halifax. Drafted by the New Jersey Devils, Danton appeared to have accomplished the dream of many—however, a series of events led to Danton’s dream devolving into a nightmare. Following 87 games with the Devils and St. Louis Blues, Danton was convicted of conspiracy to commit murder and sentenced to seven and a half years in prison. After serving a little over five years in prison, Danton was given parole last September and has been trying to get his life back on track, a process that led him to enroll at Saint Mary’s in January. Having an ex-NHL player at the school—particularly one with Danton’s level of fame— turned a few heads in the first days of classes, but the former pro took it all in stride. “First couple of days I was getting second and third glances,” he admitted. “I don’t know what they were thinking, I don’t want to know what they were thinking, but it’s tapered down. I’m a pretty sociable guy, so I mess around with a lot of people there. I’ve met a lot of good people in Halifax.” Danton admits he didn’t know anything about CIS hockey until a coach called and suggested playing for his program. After speaking with a number of different teams, Danton eventually ended up in Halifax at Saint Mary’s. “The main reason (I chose Saint Mary’s) was they seemed not to be surrounded by the whole hockey factor. It was more about giving me a second chance and wanting me to succeed in life in areas other than hockey,” he said.
“They went the extra mile to make me feel comfortable, to make the situation feel at home.” Head coach Trevor Stienburg said he didn’t give it much thought when Danton first left a message inquiring if he could suit up for the Huskies this season. “We didn’t really give it a lot of time, but when I presented it to the players, more in a joking way, they seemed to take a little bit of ownership of it and they convinced me about second chances,” said Stienburg. St ienburg said t hat Danton’s influence, both on and off the ice, has been nothing but positive. “You see him out in practice here, he’s full of enthusiasm. It’s almost infectious,” said the coach. “He works hard, he’s so committed to his hockey. Everything he does he’s committed to: to his schoolwork, to his hockey.” “He’s got some experience, he’s played pro, he’s had a lot of downers in his life, but he’s looking at this like a second chance and is making the most of it anytime he steps on the ice, or does anything for that matter.” Despite having NHL experience, five years off the ice would dull anyone’s game, and Stienberg admitted he didn’t know what to expect when Danton finally stepped into the arena. For his part, Danton admitted his game isn’t where he would like it to be, but he’s always been one to think there’s room for improvement. That hasn’t changed with his switch to the CIS. Perfect ly illust rat ing t he turnaround in Danton’s life, six months after he was released from prison he helped the Huskies win their first national championship, defeating the University of Alberta Golden Bears 3-2 in overtime on March 28. Danton said the victory is that much sweeter after all that he’s been through. “I wasn’t a very good person back then, and now it’s the start of a journey that’s not over, which makes it that much more special.” U