Crescent Magazine April 2015

crescent MAGAZINE

THE OTHER F-WORD Feminism has become a buzzword these days, but many are unsure of what feminism actually is. | 16

CRACKING THE STAINED-GLASS CEILING Some religions are criticized for not being inclusive of women. Where do women stand in the church today? | 26

NOT HOME ALONE

College seniors are concerned with where they will live

and work after graduation. Even for those with a plan, entering the real world can be nerve-racking. | 20 April 2015 | University of Evansville | College Culture Upfront | issuu.com/uecrescent | $2.50

Create the best YouTube video to promote “Pride Prom” and receive a $100 prize!

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$ Tri-State Alliance invites you to its 14th annual

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ANY

“Bros, be excellent to each other.”

LAST

S D R O W

Millie Harlow

Editor-in-Chief, LinC

“You can do anything good, better than anyone.”

Travis Hasenour

Creative Director, Crescent Magazine Designer, LinC

“Like an ‘80s film, always add more glitter.”

“This is my quote.

It’s really meta.”

Ashley Matthews

“Embrace your weirdness.”

Editing Director, Crescent Magazine

“Go ahead!

Fall in love with these people.”

Olivia Tooker

Copy Editor, LinC

Emily Krieble

Writing Director, Crescent Magazine

Photo Editor, Crescent Magazine Chief Photographer, LinC

“Ditch contempt.

Sports Columnist & Writer, Crescent Magazine

Including your childhood.”

“Stay swaggy.”

Rachael McGill

“Netflix counts as studying for screenwriting class.”

Writer, Crescent Magazine

Graham Chattin

Writer, Crescent Magazine

“I used the same notebooks for four years.”

Chris Norris

Writing Director, Crescent Magazine

2014–15 LINC & CRESCENT MAGAZINE STAFFS

Kate Sarber

Toward everyone.

Ian Heslinger

CLASS OF 2015

“Don’t be delicate.

Be vast and brilliant.”

Anna Sheffer

“Dreams are made before college. Backup plans are implemented during.”

“Time you enjoyed wasting was not wasted time.”

Copy Editor, Crescent Magazine

Congratulations, StudPub Seniors

McKenzie Ellis

First Time Columnist & Writer, Crescent Magazine

“So much testosterone in early Irish literature.”

Haley Albers

Writer, Crescent Magazine

Paige Watts

Copy Editor, Crescent Magazine

Contents EDITORIAL Writing Directors

THIS MONTH 8

Painting, yoga and herbal remedies sound like the interests of a hippie.

But senior Miranda Amey is more than her eclectic hobbies.

CHRIS NORRIS ANNA SHEFFER

Senior Writer MARISA PATWA

16

20

26

ASHLEY MATTHEWS

34

Copy Editors EMILY KRIEBLE PAIGE WATTS

36

CREATIVE Creative Director TRAVIS HASENOUR

Photo Editor

37

DEPARTMENTS 3 OUR VIEWPOINT 4 THE POSTSCRIPT 6 INNOVATION 10 WITHIN FAITH

COVER | Graham Chattin

12 FIRST TIME

Everyone worries about what comes after graduation, and it seems like more and more millennials are ending up back at home. Are graduates doomed to sleep on their parents’ couches forever?

15 QUITE A PAIR

FEATURE | Rachael McGill & Haley Albers Women’s roles in religion have always been disputed. How have these gender ideals changed over time, and what progress will be made?

EDITING Editing Director

FEATURE | Anna Sheffer & Marisa Patwa Despite advancements in women’s rights, feminism remains a controversial movement. But why is that, and what is feminism really about?

Writers HALEY ALBERS GRAHAM CHATTIN MCKENZIE ELLIS IAN HESLINGER DEJA JOHNSON RACHAEL MCGILL RYAN MURPHY

FASCINATING PEOPLE | McKenzie Ellis

19 THROUGH THE LENS 23 IN THE NEWS 25 Q&A 28 BRAIN BOMB

OVERTIME | Ian Heslinger

29 WHO KNEW?

Women’s golf’s Kayla Katterhenry has a style and quiet determination that has put her in the UE record books and at the top of the MVC.

30 SEXUAL TENSION

A CLOSER LOOK | Chris Norris

32 FULL-COURT PRESS

Most writers specialize in one genre, but William Baer, professor of creative writing, has published everything from ballads to interviews.

33 ATHLETES IN ACTION’

A CLOSER LOOK | Anna Sheffer Margaret McMullan, professor of creative writing, approaches her writing and teaching careers with a mix of goofiness and professionalism.

31 CAMPUS CRIME

38 OFF THE WALL 40 MOTLEY CREW

KATE SARBER

Photographer MAKAYLA SEIFERT

Designers

facebook.com/uecrescent | twitter.com/uestudpub | issuu.com/uecrescent | crescentmagazine@evansville.edu

TROY BURGER KAYLA SEIFERT

Find out what’s happening with Student Congress each Friday on the magazine’s Facebook page.

MARKETING & SALES

2

HOW TO CONTACT US Ridgway University Center, University of Evansville, 1800 Lincoln Ave., Evansville, Ind. 47722 Editorial e-mail: crescentmagazine@evansville.edu • Phone: (812) 488–2846 • FAX: (812) 488–2224 Marketing & Sales: (812) 488–2221 & 488–2223 • crescentadvertising@evansville.edu

Circulation Assistant

Crescent Magazine is the University of Evansville’s student magazine. It is written, edited and designed by and for UE students

PATRICK ROQUE

and published six times during the academic year. Circulation is 1,700, and it is distributed to 18 campus locations and housed online at www.issuu.com. It is funded through advertising sales and a subscription fee paid on behalf of students by the UE Student Government Association. Printed by Mar-Kel Printing, Newburgh, Ind. © 2015 Student Publications, University of Evansville. z editorial policy: Commentary expressed in unsigned editorials represents a consensus opinion of the magazine’s Editorial Board. Other columns, reviews, essays, articles and advertising are not necessarily the opinion of the CMEB or other members of staff. z letter submissions: Crescent Magazine welcomes letters from UE students, faculty, staff, administrators and alumni, but material the CMEB regards as libelous, malicious and/or obscene will not be published. Letters should not exceed 250 words. For verification, letters must include the author’s name, class standing or title and email address. Crescent Magazine does not print anonymous letters or those that cannot be verified. Letters will be edited as needed. Email letters to crescentmagazine@evansville.edu, with “letter” written in the subject line.

April 2015 • Crescent Magazine

Crescent Magazine • April 2015

Aces identity. The Student Alumni Association sponsors Purple Fridays to get students to wear school colors. They even pass out prizes. Yet no one participates outside of a few dedicated students and faculty or anyone who happens to remember to wear purple those days.

The last time there was a large-scale show of UE spirit was in early fall 2012, when UE was trying to win an appearance on “Today with Kathie Lee and Hoda.”

That campaign culminated in a flash mob where about 100 students — a whopping 5 percent of campus — filled the Ridgway Center main stairway wearing school colors and fake mustaches. It’s too much to ask for that to happen every week, but some show of support would be nice.

Finding a reason for UE’s lack of community is difficult. There is no one glaring thing that separates students from each other. Low attendance at games, SAB events and other activities are effects rather than causes. Maybe UE just attracts the kind of students who are more interested in academics than finding an identity through their college.

The core issue is pride. The only thing UE students bond over is complaining.

Students know they get a good education, but outside of the classroom, they take no pride in UE. If students aren’t proud of their college, they aren’t going to support it, whether that is through wearing school colors or donating money as alumni.

So how do we make being an Ace mean something? Administrators think offering prizes or food as incentives to show up to events is enough, but that strategy just gets students to halfheartedly participate — if they show up at all.

Change comes from creating a reason for students to be proud and call themselves Purple Aces, a reason for students to wear UE merchandise as much as they currently wear other schools’. Maybe this isn’t something people want to change, but we won’t know until we try.

Our Viewpoint

I

t seems like every school has an identity students can rally behind. Indiana, they’re the Hoosiers. Kentucky, they’re the Big Blue Nation. Notre Dame, they’re the Fighting Irish. At UE, we are supposed to call ourselves Purple Aces, but how many of us actually do?

The more common identifier is the less-colorful “UE student.” It doesn’t sound like a huge difference, but it is a symptom of a larger problem: a lack of overarching community at UE. Sure, students have their own groups just like any other school. Majors, organizations and Greek life have communities with a lot of pride. But these groups, for the most part, are so separated that it prevents us from having one Ace identity.

School identities are often wrapped up in athletics. When teams do well, it is easy to gather together and support fellow students. UE’s lack of championships is an easy target for this criticism, but even when our teams are winning, students don’t go to games. And some schools’ teams have devoted followings even with poor seasons.

Even students who support the team do so with reservation. Students may wear purple or have a bag or sweatshirt with the Aces logo on it, but the student section is not the sea of school colors in the way other schools’ are, and we don’t collectively wear much UE gear anyway.

The purple and orange combination sets us apart. Having a riverboat gambler mascot with a giant mustache sets us apart.

But instead of using that uniqueness to develop a niche following, UE seems to shove those elements in a corner and sticks to less-than-inspiring uniforms and a mascot that is, well, kind of creepy looking.

Other schools have built communities on strange color schemes and mascots. Western Kentucky has Big Red — a big red creature with the school’s letters on its chest. And any UE student who has attended Harlaxton has seen WKU students wearing shirts with him on it, while UE students wear anything but Ace Purple.

Maybe the culprit is our size. Large schools have more of a budget for community building, but UE’s size should work to its advantage. Everyone is crammed together, so there should be some camaraderie from seeing the same people every day.

There have been efforts to form an

WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO

BE AN ACE? Most schools have something that brings their students together and creates a sense of community.

What unites UE students?

DIRECTORS’ NOTE: Our staff has worked hard to create six issues we all could be proud of. It hasn’t been easy, but nothing worth doing ever is. Thank you to the staff for contributing so much of their time and effort. And thank you, campus, for reading and supporting us.

3

The Postscript

ANNA SHEFFER

ENCOURAGING

SCHOOL SPIRIT

Student involvement is an issue on campus, but why, and can it be fixed?

I

t is no secret that UE students are not always willing to attend campus events. The student section at sporting events is normally sparsely populated, SAB main events are sporadically attended, Greeks are really the only ones who attend Bike Race and some students who pick up their tickets to Sunset Concert are more likely to skip the show than attend.

While most students would agree that there are plenty of things to do at UE, students don’t seem to want to attend them. Is it because they don’t care for the activities or is it because of something else that prevents them from participating?

Getting students to attend activities — and getting the word out about those activities — is a challenge. With people’s interests so varied and each seeming to prefer a different way to receive information, communication is a bigger challenge than ever before.

Greeks sponsor their philanthropic events, and fellow Greeks attend them in droves. But there are a variety of other groups — RSA, International Club and SAB, just to name a few — that plan and invite students to attend their events and have only a handful of people show up. And it seems as if publicity for many activities is limited to Flush Flash, AceNotes or announcements at Student Congress. These avenues apparently are not sufficient since many students still have a hard time finding out what is going on, if they know at all.

Junior Lelia Dant said that while she feels the campus community is unified as a whole, groups of students do not often intermingle and support one another.

“We’re all in the same location, but I feel like all the groups are very separate,” she said.

Senior Megan Moran, Student Congress chief executive, has noticed this as well and said that while she is not sure how to fix it, improved communication would help. She said there are students doing great things on campus, but a lack of awareness prevents others from hearing about them.

But there is more to it than communication problems. Part of the problem with student attendance at events is because many students are not interested in what is being offered.

“I feel like we take academics more seriously than things like Homecoming or sporting events,” Dant said, “and that re-

4

flects on the dynamic of the university.”

Senior Andrew Abad, SAB’s special events chair, echoed this sentiment and said getting students to know what is happening at an event could spark their interest.

“When people get there, they generally enjoy what’s going on,” he said. “But people just don’t know about it or what it is, so they don’t want to go.”

He said better communication, as well as finding ways to get students excited for events, could boost attendance.

In many ways, especially when it comes to sports, other universities have a more unified student body than UE does.

For example, Butler’s mascot, the Bulldog, is everywhere, sometimes even on T-shirts worn by UE students. Butler students rally around its sporting events, especially men’s basketball, and its website reports that 94 percent of students are involved in campus activities. Butler offers a similar number of student organizations as UE — about 150.

In general, UE students simply do not identify as Purple Aces; they tell others they attend UE, with no mention of the nickname or mascot since Purple Aces and Ace Purple don’t seem to complement each other. Students at other schools refer to themselves by some term associated with the school, but UE students do not rally behind Purple Aces in the same way.

UE is also not the only school to have problems with student attendance at sporting events. Attendance, according to ESPN, is decreasing everywhere — even at large schools. For example, although Oklahoma sells more than 8,000 football student season tickets each year, 28.2 percent of the ticketholders didn’t show up to games last season.

And this is not an isolated incident. At Michigan, which had the best track record for student attendance last year, 26 percent of students who had already paid for their tickets did not show up to home football games last season.

Although other schools are struggling to get students to attend sporting events, Abad said there is still a difference between UE and other schools.

“After going to conferences for SAB, it seems like other schools have more school spirit,” he said, “and they are able to use that to get students involved.”

April 2015 • Crescent Magazine

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Innovation & Science

FINDING THE RIGHT photo by Kate Sarber

MOTIVATION RYAN MURPHY

A

s most students know, it can be difficult to get motivated to go to work and even harder to get motivated for school and all of its demands. But why does this happen, and what can be done to change it? Senior Mallory Mooney has been working to answer those questions: to figure out what exactly motivates people and what makes them want to work hard.

“A person’s motivation affects every aspect of [his or her] life,” she said.

Mooney sent an online survey to students last fall, asking them to answer about 20 questions to help identify what motivated or didn’t motivate them. She took into account things like GPA, getting or keeping scholarships and making family proud.

About 40 Berry Plastics manufacturing department employees also completed the survey. It was modified for the workplace, and took into account things like work titles, promotions and gaining status in the workplace.

As she expected, Mooney, who is a human resources intern for Berry, found that workers were more motivated by external factors, such as money and bonuses, than internal factors, such as feelings of accomplishment.

“

What Mooney did not expect to find was that the tangible rewards were less popular than things such as recognition from peers.

She also was surprised to find that, even though people needed others to recognize their abilities, a lack of external recognition did not negatively affect internal motivation.

Kevin Gray, associate professor of sociology and criminal justice, worked with Mooney on the project and praised the practicality of the research, since any sort of organization needs this kind of data to better reach out to its employees.

Mooney said the data also pointed to two factors that negatively affected students and those in the workplace: stress and large workloads. The surveys showed these factors made people less inclined to work hard.

She believes the results of the survey could inspire employers to find better ways to motivate their workers, which could make them more productive.

“If we put more effort into recognizing our students and employees, then they’re more likely to be motivated,” Mooney said.

Since Mooney hopes to work in human resources after she graduates, she said the re-

sults of her research will help her to do her job better and goes along with her interest in finding what employees expect from their jobs.

While the results were helpful, the responses could be different for other demographics. And even within the same company, different departments might have different motivation trends.

Gray believes positions in the workplace could also play a factor, as well as the fact that some jobs are simply for people to make a living, while others are seen as a career. He is also interested in seeing the project revisited later as a way to gauge changes.

“It’s always useful to replicate, to see if things changed,” he said.

And as the workforce changes, the results very likely could too.

“I can see with the new generation of students and the loss of Baby Boomers in the workplace to retirement that it could have some changes,” Mooney said, “but I can’t say for sure.”

Regardless of whether the trends change or not, the results of Mooney’s study give valuable insight. It shows there is more to motivation than meets the eye.

A person’s motivation affects every aspect of [his or her] life.

6

”

April 2015 • Crescent Magazine

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+ Free quote on any book. + Promotions, giveaways and merchandise discounts during Buyback Week.

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+ UrEntal books due back no later than 5 p.m. May 6, 2015.

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Crescent Magazine • April 2015

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Renting books in the summer or fall?

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Fascinating People

One mindfully motivated student connects her global, artistic and spiritual interests.

LIVING A LIFE OF

BALANCE AND

FLEXIBILITY MCKENZIE ELLIS

P

ainting, yoga, herbal remedies and spirituality — all the makings of a New Age flower child. But senior Miranda Amey is more than this classic stereotype might suggest. Majoring in archaeology and art and associated studies, Amey manages her many passions while striving to stay mindful of each moment.

“She has a definite persistence,” said James Ware, professor of philosophy and religion.

Unlike other archaeology majors, she focuses on texts instead of artifacts. This involves reading full Greek texts. Archaeology is what first brought Amey to UE because not many other schools listed archaeology as a major.

“At the time, I was really interested in the archaeology program,” she said, “and I knew I wanted to study abroad.”

Instead of going to Harlaxton, Amey spent a semester in Florence, Italy, and visited Greece, where her roommate, senior Zoe Post, was studying. The Cleveland native had already gone global earlier in life when her family moved to Singapore for five years.

“When we were there we had the beautiful ability to travel more,” Amey said.

Once there, Amey’s family visited many countries, including Malaysia, Indonesia, Cambodia, Egypt, New Zealand and Australia.

“She definitely is globally minded,” Post said.

“She lives to meet new people.”

In high school, Amey started a project that blended her global interest with her artistic inclination: oil paint portraits that incorporated culture through color.

“You find these spots of different color,”

“

she said, “and I really like pulling them out and making them noticeable and using them throughout the painting.”

The winner of this year’s Gumbert’s Award, presented annually to a junior or senior art major based on consistency of work and academic excellence, Amey also received the Peterson and Krannert galleries assistantship for the year, a position Ralph Larmann, professor of art, said is reserved for the best.

“She will push herself,” he said. “She’ll take chances and look for creative solutions.”

Amey’s oil on canvas, “Nudity,” received the “Best in Show Purchase Award” last month during the annual Student Art Exhibition and will become a part of UE’s permanent art collection. Post credits Amey’s success to hard work.

“She’s constantly thinking of new ideas and honing her skills,” she said. “She’s very dedicated, and that’s why I think her artwork is quite good.”

Amey said one of her dream jobs would be working on character concept art for movies or video games.

“I want to be on that team of people to come up with how that movie is going to come together as a whole and then see how that design is going to go through,” she said.

Amey’s passion for yoga also factors into her future plans, as she hopes to obtain a teacher certification after graduation. Its athleticism caught her interest her freshman year, but she later realized yoga’s mental and spiritual aspects.

“I found that the more I did yoga, the easier it was and the less stressed I was,” she said.

Amey said yoga asks you to feel uncomfort-

able and take note of it, but also to move on to the next pose, an idea that can be carried into one’s life as well. There isn’t an obstacle that cannot be overcome by just working through it.

“That takes a lot of quiet in your own mind,” she said. “This situation is uncomfortable, but doable.”

Amey comes from a Protestant background, but her family’s rocky relationship with the church left her questioning her faith. Some of that faith found a place in yoga.

“She is as intentional about doing yoga, and practicing, and working toward a goal, as some people are about God,” Post said. “She’s not like a weird, New Age hippie, but she’s very spiritual, you know, very mindful.”

Amey describes herself as spiritual, believing in a greater power, but not religious.

“This is probably going to sound so out there,” she said, “but there are these connections that tie living creatures together, some kind of vibration that echoes through the world.”

Besides yoga, Amey is mindful in other ways.

Before taking any medicines that may have odd side effects, she turns to herbal remedies.

“I guess I try to be as natural as possible with medicine,” she said.

Post said when she would suggest someone take ibuprofen, Amey would offer an essential oil. Her mindfulness shapes her interactions.

“Miranda really thinks deeply about things and is intuitive about how people work and what drives them and what makes them click,” Post said. “She’s very intentional about her relationships. She’s just a great friend. That’s really lame to say, but it’s true.”

She’s not like a weird, New Age hippie, but she’s very spiritual.

8

”

April 2015

•

Crescent Magazine

photo by Kate Sarber Crescent Magazine

•

April 2015

9

Within Faith

RACHAEL MCGILL

A LIFE WITH

LITTLE SUFFERING Despite Buddhism’s growing popularity in the West, many know little about it.

P

eople sometimes say they want to live the Buddhist lifestyle so they can detach themselves from society, but few really know what Buddhism is all about.

A 2010 Pew Research survey reported that Buddhists made up about 7 percent of the world’s population — 300 million people. What began thousands of years ago as a series of enlightened teachings grew into a world religion.

Buddhism is believed to have started 2,500 years ago with an Indian prince named Siddhartha Gautama. He grew up Hindu, but on a tour of a city in his father’s kingdom in Nepal he observed a dead man and how an elderly man, a sick man and a homeless man were living. Afterward, Gautama left his family to live like the homeless man, eventually reaching enlightenment, which he taught to people.

Many consider the Four Seals of Dharma, a list of principles, to be the core teachings taught by Gautama, or the Buddha: all compounded things are temporary, emotion is suffering, all phenomena are empty and nirvana is peace.

Alan McCoy, director of Evansville’s Palchen Study Group, said one admirable thing about Buddhism is that you can practice it without neglecting another religion’s beliefs.

“In the process of the Buddhist path you eventually become Buddhist,” he said, “but you’re not required to renounce any other faith.”

But some believe if a teaching contradicts any of the Four Seals, that teaching cannot be considered a Buddhist one.

Others consider the Four Noble Truths, another list of principles, to be the Buddha’s core teachings. These truths state that all life is suffering. Suffering comes from a desire for things to be different and one must end desire to end suffering. The fourth principle states that suffering can be ended by following the Eightfold Path.

John Paulson, dhamma leader at Evansville’s Mindful Heart Buddha Sangha, said the suffering these principles refer to is not the same as physical pain.

“Suffering is a quality of the mind, a conscious experience,” he said. “The way things are and the way we want them to be don’t match up, so we suffer.”

All of the Path’s principles are strong suggestions to rid one’s life and others’ lives of suffering. They involve being in an optimal state — right understanding, intention, speech, ac-

10

tion, livelihood, effort, mindfulness and concentration.

Paulson said the Path also describes concrete methods of self-improvement.

“We have to become conscious of our own patterns of body, speech and mind,” he said, “and we have to work with those.”

Those who practice Buddhism want to make sure people do not get the wrong idea about what Buddhism means. Practicing meditation alone, for example, does not make you a Buddhist. McCoy said Buddhist practice should wake you up.

“One of the biggest misconceptions is that it’s all about peace and tranquility,” he said, “and that people are trying to escape their problems. Buddhism is not trying to escape. It’s to try to get real with their life, the way their mind works.”

Dianne Oliver, professor of religion, said some look at Buddhism and see something different from what it really is.

“Sometimes students think Buddhism is worshipping a stone or gold statue of Buddha because that’s what they see,” she said. “People associate it with idolatry because they’re worshipping that figure, but that’s not what Buddhism does.”

Oliver stressed the importance of seeing the Buddha not as a god but as a spiritual role model.

“To see Buddha as God, it doesn’t work,” she said. “By understanding core ideas of Buddhism, you can see how quickly that Buddha is not equal to God.” Paulson said many think Buddhist practice means rejecting the world, when it is really about getting rid of any attachment that causes suffering.

“When you’re awakened, that’s some of the most active living you can have,” he said. “You can experience things without them causing suffering. It’s no longer being attached in a way that causes suffering.”

Even though Buddhism has been around since 520 BCE, a surprising number of people hold various misconceptions of what it really teaches. But those who practice it encourage everyone to learn and experience it. McCoy and Paulson both keep their doors open to anyone, regardless of their religion, to experience the practice.

“Buddhism is one of the most optimistic practices that has come to the world,” Paulson said. “With enough practice, we can see the deep-seated suffering and do something about it.”

April 2015

•

Crescent Magazine

THE WOMEN OF

Phi Mu

UE C nnect

Connections for a Lifetime

WELCOME

THE UNIVERSITY OF EVANSVILLE provided me with a wonderful experience, and my degree prepared me for the real world. I accepted my first job last spring as the assistant to the executive director of resort marketing for both Red Rock and Green Valley Ranch Resort Properties in Las Vegas. I’m also active with the University of Nevada’s Zeta Tau Alpha alumni chapter. I continue to network with sisters and have been a guest speaker to discuss things like resume-building and self-image. I give back to UE by supporting the Department of Theatre and the Alumni Scholarship Fund, but also through UE Connect. I am a resource for students interested in theatre management, marketing or relocating to Las Vegas. Your connection with UE doesn’t end as a student. Continue to stay involved and give back too.

the spring 2015 Phi class to their Sisterhood Elena Barnett Kaylynn Carver Annie Dauber Kelsey Henson Kendi Klein Kaila Knies Krista Lecher Dana Owens Shauna Purdy Madeline Stone Hilliary Ward Amanda Wischmeier

citytacoevansville

Every Tuesday is

COLLEGE

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First Time

Letting a stranger touch your feet is not terrifying and can actually have surprising benefits.

PEDICURE THRONE

UNDEFEETED MCKENZIE ELLIS

S

ometimes I pretend I am an artist and paint my nails. Though my skills are minimal, and my designs are often poorly executed, they are dear to me.

My last look was inspired by an alien I had once romanced in a video game. Her skin is a lovely shade of blue, so I painted my nails to match her. But I’d always wondered how I stacked up to the professionals. Now was my chance to find out as I scheduled an appointment for a pedicure at the The Salon Professional Academy.

TSPA, located at 5545 Vogel Road, is both a salon and a school, so students provide the services. The salon buzzed with chatter as I signed a waiver, sat down and waited.

The student performing my pedicure, Kennedy Phelps, appeared and called my name.

She led me to several massive, black chairs with little tub attachments at their feet. I sat on one of these “pedicure thrones” while Phelps asked me basic questions about my health and whether or not I bite my nails. She did not specify whether she meant fingers or toes, so neither did I. After recording my responses, a teacher came to double-check everything before we began.

Phelps asked me if I had nail polish on as I took off my shoes. It took me a moment to remember. How could I have forgotten my blue alien girlfriend? I tentatively put my feet up on the cushion by the tub, and she removed the polish.

Phelps asked if I liked warm water as she filled the tub. I told her yes. It was a little hot, but I soon became accustomed. Phelps poured bright blue, sparkly salt crystals into the bath.

12

The cloudy water hid my feet, so I put them right up on the tub’s little jets. Phelps said she only does a few pedicures a month.

“Usually around this time, people come in,” she said. “When it gets to be sandal weather. Or just for relaxation.”

It was definitely chill, but I felt a little silly just sitting there with my feet in a tub of hot sparkly water. I asked Phelps if feet grossed her out.

“No, not really,” she said, laughing.

Phelps said she went to college last year but didn’t know what she wanted to study. Some friends from her high school had introduced her to TSPA, where she joined the salon’s 90 students training in the art of beauty.

“It’s a lot cheaper to go here than to go to a salon,” she said.

Phelps asked me if I wanted my toenails cut or filed, a cue that they were done soaking. Already pretty short, she decided to just file them. Right as she put file to toenails, I remembered that I absolutely hate having my toenails filed. I tried to send the part of my mind screaming in discomfort somewhere far, far away.

Phelps asked what color I wanted. I said blue, the first color I thought of. Maybe because of my fictional alien girlfriend.

Then Phelps worked my cuticles, pushing them back with a metal tool. Before this moment, I had not known what a cuticle was and did not know it could be a source of pain.

Beauty is suffering, I thought.

Phelps next used a tiny scissor-like instrument to trim away excess. While she worked on one foot, I put the other back in the water,

not knowing what else to do with it. She affirmed my actions. I guess my foot had looked confused.

After cuticles, Phelps brought three shades of blue polish to my throne, and I chose a dark teal. But it was not yet time for painting.

Phelps applied a lotion, picking up my foot to work it in. She buffed my toenails, much more tolerable than filing them. Then more lotions: a scratchy yellow scrub and a shea butter mask that felt like mud. Phelps wrapped hot wet towels around each foot and started rearranging her tools. I felt like the end was near. Then she applied yet another lotion.

Finally, it was time for polish. I tried not to twitch, knowing how hard it can be to keep a steady hand. Phelps was precise, carefully touching up the edges.

“Everything you do, you get graded,” she said.

Students spend the first eight weeks in theory classes mostly doing bookwork. After that, they’re on the floor. It takes about 10 months to get a cosmetology license, Phelps said.

She put a serum on my toenails to help them dry faster and asked if I wanted disposable flip-flops to wear out instead of my closetoed shoes. Together we wrestled them on, cautious around the fresh polish.

Pedicures start at $25. TSPA is open Monday from 9 a.m. to 8 p.m., Tuesday–Thursday from 9 a.m. to 8:30 p.m. and Friday–Saturday from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m.

At the end, the teacher came by and asked how my feet felt. I said, “Good,” and I guess that was true. The process had paid off as my toes gleamed in the late afternoon light.

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April 2015

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Crescent Magazine

Quite a Pair

Millie Harlow & Olivia Tooker

CLOSER THAN

SISTERS DEJA JOHNSON

photo by Kate Sarber

S

ome friends are so close, people aren’t really sure if they are siblings, partners or just the best of friends. Seniors Olivia Tooker and Millie Harlow have reached this level of friendship.

“You know how sometimes bromances get a little weird?” Tooker asked, laughing. “We did that freshman year where we pretended to be secret lovers. It lasted until Millie’s boyfriend was like, ‘Can you not?’”

Tooker and Harlow met freshmen year when they lived down the hall from each other in Hughes Hall. They hit it off right away, although Harlow initially had no idea.

“Apparently, when she first saw me she was like, ‘You, I will be your friend,’” she said.

Tooker remembers seeing Harlow wearing “Doctor Who” T-shirts on three occasions and becoming instantly interested in becoming friends with the Lafayette, Ind., native.

“I was like, ‘I’ve got to become friends with this woman!’” Tooker said.

They learned they shared more interests than just a love of “Doctor Who,” including their majors — Harlow is creative writing and literature, and Tooker is literature and writing.

Once Harlow was invited to hang out in Tooker’s room, she never went away. The two often spent nights browsing Tumblr or watching TV. They made Monday night TV a tradition, first watching MTV’s “Teen Wolf” and

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April 2015

later switching to HBO’s “Game of Thrones.”

Although the two have much in common, they are different in many ways.

“Olivia is much more outgoing and confident,” Harlow said. “And she’s undeniably stubborn.”

Harlow and Tooker use their differences to their advantage. Harlow doesn’t like to impose on people, so she often uses Tooker to relay her ideas to their group of friends, even when Tooker hasn’t been a part of the conversation.

“I think that really works in their favor,” senior Laura Acchiardo said, “Olivia being more outspoken and Millie being a bit more shy. They kind of balance each other out in that way. It’s really kind of cute.”

Although Tooker helps Harlow get her points across, they both rely on the other for support. When they were both taking Writing 207, “Introduction to Short Story,” Tooker would take hold of Harlow’s hand while Tooker’s work was being critiqued.

After becoming friends, life was just not as fun without the other. When Harlow was at Harlaxton during the fall 2013 semester, Tooker struggled with her best friend being abroad. But Harlow missed Tooker, who calls Lake Placid, Fla., home, just as much.

“It was pretty awful,” Tooker said. “We didn’t do too hot that semester, neither of us.

When she came back, I was so excited.”

Once reunited, they made up for lost time.

They both have worked for the LinC for years, Harlow since she was a freshman and Tooker since she was a sophomore. They spent last summer working separate jobs for Residence Life, volunteering at Willard Library and going on dates to McDonald’s or Cracker Barrel.

And in the fall, they took a trip to Chicago to see Tooker’s favorite musician in concert.

It’s safe to say the two are inseparable. And their bromance has simply gone too far to turn back now.

“She’s my best friend. She knows too much,” Tooker said, accompanied by her highly recognizable laugh. “We have too much power over each other really.”

Both women will be graduating in May, and neither is looking forward to leaving the other. Tooker is opposed to saying goodbye — Harlow said Tooker would prefer to ride off into the distance like a cowboy in a movie — but Harlow is determined to let her know what she means to her.

“If I didn’t have her,” Harlow said, “I’d probably have someone else, but I’d rather not have someone else.”

Though parting is inevitable, they will never stop being in each other’s lives.

“I will be her friend and love her until I die,” Harlow said. “We might not talk for a while, but I will always know I have her.”

15

Society is once again having a heyday over feminism. We use the word all the time, but what does it really mean to be a feminist?

-word F THE OTHER

ANNA SHEFFER & MARISA PATWA

F

1848: The first women’s rights convention is convened in Seneca Falls, N.Y. 1869: Susan B. Anthony and Elizabeth Cady Stanton form the National Woman Suffrage Association.

1893: Colorado becomes the first state to pass an amendment granting women’s suffrage.

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eminism is a dirty word. It has been since it was coined in the 1890s in association with the movement in France for equal political and legal rights for women. The word seems to pop up everywhere these days, and it is still a debated topic, one that women and men alike can’t seem to always agree on. Some women even avoid labeling themselves feminists for fear of being called “man-haters” or “angry lesbians,” and Time readers voted to ban the word in 2015.

With all the buzz the term and subject generates, it begs an answer to the question: What is feminism really about?

The most common misconception about feminism is that all feminists are liberal man-haters. Christian Broadcasting Network founder Pat Robertson even said in the early 1990s that feminism was not about equal rights for women, but was instead a socialist movement that encouraged women to become lesbians, divorce their husbands, kill their children and practice witchcraft.

While no one then or today could really take that belief seriously, most people do not have a clear understanding of the term and what people are fighting for as far as women’s rights are concerned. In reality, feminists want the same rights and privileges men have had for centuries. They encourage, support and fight for the equality of all genders, not the oppression of another.

The feminist movement is often characterized by three separate periods, or waves, that called for social justice and change. The first began in the 1840s with, among other things, women wanting property and female education rights. It also dealt with the opposition to ownership of married women by their husbands.

The movement continued through the early part of the

1916: Margaret Sanger opens the first U.S. birth control clinic in Brooklyn, N.Y.

1920: The 19th Amendment is passed, granting women the right to vote.

1923: First Equal Rights Amendment is introduced. The ERA has yet to be ratified.

20th century when it centered on women gaining political power and the right to vote — the women’s suffrage campaign — and also included the fight for furthering women’s economic rights.

The second period was generally considered to have occurred from the early 1960s through the 1990s. The 1963 publication of “The Feminine Mystique” by Betty Friedan, called by The New York Times one of the most influential nonfiction books of the 20th century, reignited the movement when Friedan suggested that women needed to find identity and meaning in their lives other than through their husbands and children.

The phrase “women’s liberation” was first used in the United States in 1964, and the National Organization for Women was established in 1966. NOW demanded that women receive equal pay for equal work, and the movement also focused on women’s reproductive rights and birth control and added abortion rights in the early 1970s.

It was also largely concerned with other issues of equality, such as ending gender discrimination.

“The second wave is still very pervasive today,” said Lisa Nikolidakis, assistant professor of creative writing. “It is often thought of as white, middle-class feminism and not especially inclusive feminism.”

The beginning of the third period is often disputed, but many consider it to be the era of modern feminism. This wave has been mostly concerned with fighting against stereotypes about femininity and sexuality. The movement today includes the re-appropriation of terms such as “slut” and “bitch” and is inclusive of genders other than male and female.

Modern feminism also seeks to examine all roles of

1960: Food and Drug Administration approves birth control pills.

1963: Congress passes the Equal Pay Act, making it illegal for employers to pay a woman less than men for the same job.

April 2015

•

1972: Title IX of the Education Amendments bans sex discrimination in schools.

Crescent Magazine

Feature women in society. Rather than looking at women just as women, it considers other aspects of their lives, such as race and class.

Junior Peter Orkiszewski, who views himself as a feminist, said feminism today is more centered on changing societal attitudes, whereas past waves of feminism were about changing legislation. “[But] I think we’re not there yet,” he said.

“We’re not at a place where men and women are equal, whether in the eyes of the law or the hearts and minds of individuals.”

Lisa Kretz, assistant professor of philosophy, teaches Philosophy 450, “Feminist Philosophy,” where she informs students about the history and goals of feminism. She said feminism today is fighting to change the structures of society, although some laws protecting women’s equality are already in place.

Kretz said many students come into the course believing that men and women have equality because women can vote and hold jobs just like men. But worldwide, this is not necessarily the case, and modern women are fighting to change that.

“It’s really a question of who’s in power and who has a say and who doesn’t,” Kretz said. “Freedom of access is still a big issue for women.”

A wage gap between men and women also still exists in the workforce. Although some say this wage gap is a myth, and the numbers are often confusing or inconsistent, it does exist. The Institute for Women’s Policy Research reported that women were paid 78 percent of what men were paid as of 2013. But many wage gap deniers say it is illegal to pay certain workers more than others, so why would women be paid less than men?

A 2014 study published in the American Sociological Review analyzed the wage gap between men and women from 1979 to 2009 and found that the simple answer — but not the only answer — is that men are more likely to work longer hours than women.

The study found that the reason for this has to do with the fact that women are likely to be more active in childrearing than men, meaning they are expected to place a greater emphasis on their families and focus less on their careers.

1973: The Supreme Court establishes a woman’s right to a safe and legal abortion as a result of Roe v. Wade.

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1978: The Pregnancy Discrimination Act bans employment discrimination against pregnant women.

April 2015

Although there are not laws in place preventing women from making the same amount of money that men do, gender roles and outdated views of women in the workforce still make this more likely.

And Kretz said this wage gap, in addition to traditional gender roles, more often keep women at home. If a husband makes more money than his wife, it makes more sense for her to stay at home and care for their children and for him to be the wage earner.

Modern feminism fights to eliminate this way of thinking by adjusting societal attitudes and campaigning for equal pay.

Nikolidakis said she tries to incorporate a bit of feminism into all of her courses, but many of her students are resistant to the label.

“So I ask them, ‘How many of you believe men and women deserve equal pay for equal work?’” she said, “and they all raise their hands. And I tell them, ‘I’m sorry to say, but whether you like it or not, that puts you into some category of being a feminist.’”

One of the biggest misconceptions about feminism today is that it is just for women. But Kretz said this is not the case, adding that men have an important role to play in the fight for equality. Feminism fights to change stereotypical ideas of masculinity as well as femininity. And movements such as the United Nations’ “HeForShe” campaign focus on male feminists.

“I think there’s the misconception that all feminists are women,” Kretz said, “and there are some really wonderful male feminists.”

Orkiszewski added that if men believe in equality for both genders, they are feminists, too.

“If someone identifies as a feminist, [he or she] shouldn’t put [him or her] down,” he said.

Senior Camille Burger, who is a member of Women’s Awareness, took Kretz’s course last fall and was pleasantly surprised that there were some men enrolled in the course as well.

“Most of the men I talk to are either feminists or OK with being feminist,” she said.

“I’m pretty careful about which men I talk to.

I’m pretty androphobic.”

Burger said she normally does not talk to men in general because of the way wom-

en are programmed to accommodate and react to them. She said there is a culture of requiring women to be beautiful in today’s society, whether it be through makeup, clothes or their body shape.

“Anything else you have to offer, whether it’s intelligence, creativity or ingenuity, is not important if you do not have beauty first,” Burger said. “There was a time in my life where I didn’t want to be valued for anything else but beauty.”

Nikolidakis said there is an archaic perception of women just as there is an archaic perception of feminists.

“There is this idea that women are supposed to be docile and always smiling, but that is not reality,” she said. “Feminists are equated

It’s not a bunch of bra-burning, man-hating [women]. It’s about generating freedom for everyone.

1994: The Violence Against Women Act tightens federal penalties for sex offenders and funds services for victims.

2013: The ban of women serving in combat roles in the military is lifted.

with being militant, man-hating women with aggression.”

Modern feminism fights to counteract both of these beliefs.

Burger said she struggled with her identity as a feminist and what that meant to the people she loves. She said she became close in high school to an older woman who resided at a retirement home where she volunteered who constantly tried to find a suitable male match for Burger because she believed a woman’s sole purpose was to be a wife.

“I came out to her as a feminist, and the first questions she asked me were if I was ever going to get married and ‘Are you a lesbian?’”

Burger said.

Feminism also fights for oppressed groups that are not necessarily made up entirely of women. Kretz said modern feminism focuses on intersectionality, meaning it considers all ways in which people are oppressed, not just by gender. Intersectionality includes fighting for minority rights, rights for LGBTQ people and class equality. Anyone who supports equal rights for all people can be viewed as a feminist.

“Now we have awareness of intersectionality,” Nikolidakis said, “and the definition of feminism is malleable. It means something different to different people, and that is not a bad thing.”

17

Intersectionality in feminism is just as important for other oppressed groups as it is for women.

Orkiszewski said part of the reason he is a feminist is because he is familiar with prejudice.

“As a gay individual and someone who has been oppressed and someone who is in theater, I feel really connected to other people who are oppressed,” he said.

Any polarizing topic makes people uncomfortable, and a lot of people have their minds made up before they even learn about a new topic.

Women Against Feminism, a social media movement found on both Facebook and Tumblr, is supported by thousands of women who post why they choose not to call themselves feminists.

They cite reasons as varied as liking masculine men, wanting to be traditionally feminine, having experienced harassment from the feminist community and not hating men.

While some radical feminists shame women for thinking this way, at its core, modern feminism is about respecting women’s lifestyles. But many of the ideas expressed on anti-feminism sites perpetuate misconceptions about feminism and don’t do anything to further the dialogue.

“I think that I’m glad we live in a country where [anti-feminist women] can have a voice,” Nikolidakis said. “The funny thing is that so many of the signs they hold up is why we need feminism.”

Nowadays, you can wear high heels and lipstick, be a soccer mom and still be a feminist.

Feminism is as varied in practice as its many practitioners are.

“There’s no such thing as one unified feminism,” Orkiszewski said.

The one thing different varieties of feminism have in common is the desire to end gender inequality, although the ways approaching it vary widely. This task may seem impossible at first glance, but changing societal attitudes does not have to start with large gestures. Enacting change can be as simple as admonishing acquaintances for making sexist jokes.

“You can call people out for real injustice,” Nikolidakis said. “It’s just like when someone tells a racist joke at a party. You can be the one to stand up and say, ‘Hey, that’s not OK.’” Orkiszewski said one of the best things people can do to help the cause is to correct microaggressions — small, unintentionally prejudiced comments — whenever one hears them.

Though feminism is what you make of it, there are definite misconceptions about the movement and what it is. It may not have one definition, but there are certain things feminism is not.

“It’s not a bunch of bra-burning, man-hating [women],” Kretz said. “It’s about generating freedom for everyone.”

18

Your future is

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Gene Wells Senior Director, Career Development

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Congratulations to the Class of 2015

It’s never too late to visit the Center for Career Development.

April 2015

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Crescent Magazine

Through the Lens

KATE SARBER

AT LAST!

Time to soak up some sun.

Spring arrives and study rooms are no longer the best places to study. Freshmen Kierssen Hasenour and Jordan Buechler go the conventional route, while sophomore Adrian deSilva mixes in a little relaxation with his studying outside on the Ridgway Center lawn. | Willian Mallmann

Choose a nice day, find a good spot and play. That’s basically what freshman Oli Ross-Musick does when the nice weather arrives. | Willian Mallmann

Crescent Magazine

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April 2015

Anatomy is fun to look at but not always fun to study.

Freshman Connor Micklo gets some reading done while friends work on their assignments. | Sadie Wacker

We thought it would never happen, but the snow and ice have melted and the sun has broken through the wintry gloom to usher in warmer days. As woolen scarves and snow boots are packed away in favor of shorts and flip-flops, students are once again appearing outside all over campus. Frisbees have replaced snowballs, bikes and longboards are sending students speeding across campus, and the sounds of guitars and ukuleles are filling the air. Although the snow days were great for catching up on the most popular Netflix shows, it’s time for sunglasses and sandals, blankets and barbecues. Whether your skin is prone to turning red or you are able to get a glorious tan, grab that book you’ve been meaning to read, some sunblock and your favorite patch of grass, because it’s time to get out and enjoy the sunshine.

Just a moment of panic. Freshman Brittney Wright gets an unexpected push from freshman Dominic Bolt while riding unconventionally on a longboard in front of Ridgway Center. | Taylor Williams

19

Cover Story

I

magine this: you return home after graduation, diploma in hand, and collapse on the twin-size bed in your childhood bedroom. Instead of preparing for a new job, you are once again surrounded by reminders of growing up. Mom and Dad, posters of ‘90s bands and out-of-date clothes still linger like phantoms around the house. You sink your face into your hands and wonder how you got back here and, more pressingly, what to do next.

While this scenario is not true for all students, it is not uncommon. The New York Times reported that one in five people in their 20s and early 30s are currently living with their parents, and for some, the path to moving forward is far from certain. This is not surprising, given the financial situation of most soon-to-be graduates.

Senior Brianne Harrell is planning to

not

HOME ALONE GRAHAM CHATTIN

Graduation is just one small step for students in the journey of life. Knowing what to do after it is the next step.

20

move back home after graduation, at least for a little while.

She said living at home is just a means to an end. The psychology major would like to get a full-time job as soon as possible so she will be able to live on her own.

“I’m living at home now because it saves money,” she said. “I’m looking at a few [graduate] programs, but I haven’t followed through with them because I know it’s not going to happen right away. I’m burned out on school.”

Fortunately, many families do what they can to help their graduates succeed after college, and most graduates are still on good terms with their parents. But college wasn’t invented to prepare people to live at home long term, and many graduates are enthusiastic to be out on their own. Not so long ago, returning home to live with parents was an unaccepted practice.

“Twenty years ago, I don’t think the notion of going home to live was an option,” said Gene Wells, senior director for Career Development.

Before Wells graduated from college, his father pulled him aside and told him he needed to have a plan because returning to live at home was not going to happen. It was not uncommon during that time for recent graduates to be living on their own, even if they didn’t quite know what they wanted to do with their life.

“I think that parents who may have gone through that thought it was harsh,” Wells said.

Harrell said while her relationship with her parents

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•

Crescent Magazine

is good, she is ready to move on to the next phase in her life.

“It’s nothing personal against my family,” she said. “I’m just ready to be on my own.”

The search for opportunities after graduation can be a time of hope and excitement, but there is also a harsher side, as many are not finding their ideal career path available to them.

Part of the story is just economics. Finding a job that pays well following a recession is always more difficult. And The New York Times reported that nearly half of recent graduates leave college with massive student loan debt — $20,000 on average — and are at least partially dependent on their parents for financial support. It is also difficult to live independently when you can only look forward to jobs that are lower paying.

“Stop dumping on them because they need parental support,” psychologist Jeffrey Jensen Arnett told The New York Times. “It doesn’t mean they’re lazy. It’s just harder to make your way now than it was in an older, simpler economy.”

But though it may be reassuring to know that moving back home is at least a temporary option, most students would rather find other ways to get by.

“Basically, moving back would be my last resort,” senior Nathan McGill said. “I prefer living on my own.”

Having served four years in the Air Force, McGill knows what it is like to live independently. But after separating from the service, he had to return home for three months in order to prepare himself for college. While he has a good relationship with his parents, he would prefer not to return home again after he graduates.

“It felt cramped,” he said. “All my stuff was in storage. They had an entire house full of their own stuff, and there was no room for my stuff.”

For other students, moving back home is not really an option at all. Senior Allie Minton said home might be necessary for some, but it wouldn’t be good for her future.

“I think for some people it can be helpful,” she said. “It can be a nice cushion, and some people need that. I feel if I went back home, I would kind of regress and feel like a kid, and it would be hard to get out.”

Wells warned that returning home can, in fact, be risky for some students, as the stimulus to succeed that they had while in school is now gone. Without a degree to work toward, faculty support or involvement in campus organizations, a student can lose forward momentum. Find-

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April 2015

ing access to resources once you leave college can also be a challenge.

But much of the class of 2015 can breathe a collective sigh of relief, if what has happened with recent graduating classes is any indication.

According to Institutional Research’s 2015 postgraduation report, 64 percent of 2014 graduates had jobs lined up by the time they graduated, and the average salary of graduates employed full time was $42,500. Another 23 percent of unemployed graduates were attending graduate school.

Wells also said liberal arts majors who feel as if they are being left in the dust by science or engineering majors shouldn’t fret too much. For students in science-related fields such as nursing, getting career experience is a prerequisite to being hired, and practicums are a part of their college experience. Liberal arts majors usually have to find those possibilities on their own, so their initial job search may be more difficult, but they generally catch up in the long run.

Economics isn’t everything, and living at home is only one of many things a graduate must worry about. A study conducted by British psychologists showed that 20- and 30-somethings were not only concerned about money, but also relationships, pressure to succeed and career direction. All of this, coupled with concerns about loneliness, insecurity and depression, make for an unpleasant but real phenomenon known as a quarterlife crisis.

Developmental psychologist Erik Erikson believed there are eight crises people may face during the stages of their life. He said a life crisis occurs for people in their early 20s after they enter the “real world” and when they begin to feel doubtful about their lives, brought on by the stress of becoming an adult. This trend has been directed specifically to millennials because they have a tendency to live with their parents for longer periods of time than previous generations.

But it is important to note that while many graduates keep their personal crises to themselves, they are not alone in their worries. Behind a calm and composed demeanor, many pending graduates are breaking a sweat when they think about their futures.

For senior Chelsea Hillenburg, the uncertainty that comes with graduating has been weighing heavily on her mind.

“I think a quarterlife crisis is when you come to the crossroads of when you have to choose what direction you’re going to take in your life,” she said. “It’s hard to know which path is the best one for you.”

It is becoming increasingly apparent that the

future is no longer a far-off, nebulous idea, but a rapidly approaching reality.

“As a senior, you’re pushed to think beyond graduation,” Harrell said, “and that’s not something you can visualize because you don’t know what’s going to happen.”

Many upperclass students are nervous about the uncertainty concerning the next stage in their lives. College life can be predictable; people settle into a routine and grow complacent, and the future can come as a wake-up call.

“I guess people just get burned out on school at a certain point and focus on how great life will be after college,” junior Caitlin McCarthy said. “I think the crisis hits when they realize it won’t always be perfect.”

Many students fantasize about graduating and transitioning directly into their dream job, but as they get closer to graduation, they start to find that real life is not so ideal. It’s hard to live the dream when real-life responsibilities will soon be something to worry about. As a theatre design major who will graduate in December, McCarthy understands this concern.

“Not making any money is a big fear, especially in this career path,” she said. “It’s one thing to be a high school student glamorizing the life in the theater and the reality of living on ramen post-college. And it’s scary to think that those dreams of changing theater may not be possible because of a lack of money.”

But students have found various ways to cope with the stress.

“I am trying to stay positive,” McCarthy said, “but eating entire pints of ice cream has been working well, and not talking about it.”

Money also drives the thinking behind other students and how they shape their goals.

As a computer science major, McGill has more concrete job options than other majors might have. He has also had college paid for because of his military service and UE’s financial aid for veterans. But money is still a concern.

“I will be going wherever the job takes me, wherever that may be,” he said, “[even though] I would be leaving behind a lot of people that I know and care for.”

Leaving behind the things that shaped us is a concern for many people.

“I realize I’m probably going to be moving away from all the friends I have here,” Minton said, “and my identity kind of relies on them.

They shape who I am.”

But when feeling down-and-out and like the weight of the future is on your shoulders, just look around.

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“You think everybody’s got it together,” senior Violet Barrs said, “but everyone has a problem.”

Even the most poised students who seem to be cruising to success without a worry are dealing with the same kind of stress that everyone else is. And all of the stress will end.

Eventually. Time is on your side.

“All of the freaking out and the worrying, it doesn’t really matter,” Minton said. “Everyone feels this way and the majority end up all right.”

THE FINAL STEP

W

ith graduation just around the corner, eager seniors and graduate students are no doubt filled with concerns centered around where they are going in life and how much money they are going to make. But before any questions can be answered, those eligible to graduate must put on their caps and gowns and take part in Commencement.

About 450 students will process during UE’s 157th Commencement, set to begin at 1:30 p.m. May 9 at Ford Center. And they will be dressed in traditional regalia, where all participants don caps and gowns as they take part in a ceremony that dates back to the first European universities in the 12th century.

While only full professors enjoy the privilege of wearing the tam, a cap that has six to eight sides and is made of soft velvet, everyone else wears a four-cornered cap called a mortarboard. Its roots can be traced to England’s Oxford University, and some believe it is square to represent the mortarboard of a master workman.

Others believe its shape represents a book; others think is represents the shape of Oxford’s campus. Regardless of its origins or meaning, it is meant to symbolize the freedom of scholarship and inquiry.

No mortarboard is complete without a tassel, and with college graduations, tassel colors correspond with the various disciplines of the university. What might be more important to graduates is the turning of the tassel from the right side to the left.

Mari Plikuhn, assistant professor of sociology, who also serves as UE’s grand marshal, said turning the tassel is a symbol that students have graduated and are now alumni of the institution.

UE also has several of its own unique symbols, and one of those is the mace. While

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maces were once weapons of war designed to crush armor, they are now used mostly for ceremonial or civil purposes, but they are still a symbol of authority.

UE’s mace was commissioned in 1988 and designed by Indiana artist Nicholas Logsdon.

It is covered from top to bottom in symbols.

The wooden staff, which is made of cherry, is 32 inches long and encircled by four sterling silver sleeves.

The first sleeve is engraved with the seven Greek letters of UE’s seal. The second is engraved with the name of former President James S. Vinson, who was president when the mace was commissioned. The third is engraved with the names of the mace’s donors, Betty and Wayne Worthington, longtime supporters of the university, and the final sleeve is engraved with Logsdon’s name and the name of the manufacturer, J.C. Boardman and Co. On the top of the staff is an orb that is 5 1/2 inches in diameter and is made from sterling silver. The orb is impressed with two medallions. The first is UE’s seal and the other is a cross from Neu Chapel, which symbolizes the school’s relationship with the United Methodist Church.

“It’s heavier than it looks,” Plikuhn said.

The mace may only be carried by the grand marshal during ceremonial occasions.

The rest of the time it is kept under lock and key in a glass case located in the lobby of Bower-Suhrheinrich Library.

During graduation, the grand marshal leads participants into the center while carrying the mace, but much of the work is done beforehand. It is up to the grand marshal to organize the event and control the flow of participants during the ceremony. Fortunately, there are about 10 other assistants to help.

The mace is followed by gonfalons — flags representing UE’s academic units — the faculty and then the graduates. Everyone may sit only after the mace has been set in its cradle.

“It’s a carefully coordinated dance,” Plikuhn said. “I take immense pride in being the person to lead the ceremony. What makes the academy different is that it’s surrounded by beautiful rituals and symbols.”

Graduates also receive a key from the UE Alumni Association. The key symbolizes their connection with UE, and is left blank because the future is shaped by the decisions of each individual graduate.

Finally, Baccalaureate will be before Commencement at 10 a.m. May 9 in Neu Chapel.

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In the News

CHRIS NORRIS

NOT YET DONE MAKING DECISIONS A year later, important decisions are still being made based on prioritization.

A

fter dominating so much of campus discussion last year, the aftermath from the prioritization process has been mostly silent. It is easy to think that the process ended when the reports were filed and the decisions were announced last spring, but there have been a number of developments this year, and some major decisions have yet to be made.

One of the biggest developments was the formation of the Academic Leadership Working Group, a seven-member committee comprised of academic administrators and one vice president and chaired by Dick Connelly, professor emeritus of philosophy, that was tasked with researching different models of academic structure.

The committee began meeting in last September and submitted its report to President Thomas Kazee in December.

The committee examined five loosely defined models, including the one currently in place at UE, and weighed the pros and cons of each.

“Right now, our structure is very traditional,” Kazee said, “and that’s not a bad thing. Maybe it’s traditional because it works.”

Kazee said while the working group presented its findings to him, it did not recommend any one model. The findings were also forwarded to the Faculty Senate executive committee and the Academic Leadership Council, which is comprised of vice presidents and other upper-level administrators. Kazee said the council has made its recommendation to him, and he would like to make a decision by May to allow extra time for adjustments.

Senate Chair Don Rodd, professor of exercise science and sport studies, said the Senate executive committee has not made its decisions yet and that, while one model might sound good in closed discussions, it is difficult to tell which model will work when implemented.

“The president said, ‘The conversation is ongoing,’” he said, “and I think that’s good.”

The working group examined one model called the Divisional Model. It would separate some already established academic departments and give the newly established departments more specialized control. The concern with this model

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April 2015

is that it would probably end up creating more administrative positions when the goal is to reduce them.

Another model explored is called First Among Equals.

With this model, the position of vice president for Academic Affairs would no longer be a position performed by just one person. Instead, academic deans would take turns fulfilling the position for a set period of time.

After initial concerns with the prioritization process, Rodd said the relationship between faculty and the board of trustees has improved, largely due to the creation of the Ad Hoc Committee on Prioritization, which includes both faculty and board members.

“One of the biggest positives to come out of this is better communication,” he said.

Getting faculty more active in the enrollment process is one way Kazee is trying to involve faculty. He wants them to be in charge of telling prospective students about their departments. Of course, this requires more time and effort on the part of faculty.

“There’s still some concern about things like, ‘Well, that’s all well and good, but are we going to be compensated?’” he said.

Rodd said faculty is willing to help, but there are questions of what faculty would have to do and how things would be coordinated with more people involved.

While these decisions are still up in the air, there have been other concrete developments. Kazee said $1.5 million was removed from the 2014–15 budget by not refilling vacated administrative positions. An additional $1.5 million will be cut for 2015–16.

“It’s easier in the short run to make cuts on the administrative side because of the nature of faculty positions,” he said.

Budget cuts next year will be based on faculty retirements, and some of those positions will not be replaced. Kazee said almost 30 faculty members accepted an early retirement incentive package and will be retiring either immediately or will soon be phased out. These numbers do not include faculty who had already planned to retire.

Losing so many faculty members will present a challenge.

On top of the obvious difficulties of having fewer faculty,

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Rodd said some departments would suffer even if the positions were refilled.

“We’re losing some of the best faculty members,” he said. “We’re losing people who are irreplaceable.”

But Rodd said students should not worry.

“What the faculty has always done is rally,” he said, “and you won’t notice a decline in the education.”

One of the concerns Senate had at the start of the year was the elimination of programs.

Rodd said the expectation was that prioritization would look at where resources could be used more effectively. Kazee said this was always a focus of prioritization.

“There was a focus on fiscal discretion,” he said, “but there was also a focus on innovation.”

This focus led to the development of the Innovation and Re-Investment Fund. The fund will receive $1.25 million from UE’s endowment over two years to give to new initiatives and programs or to strengthen existing programs.

Programs deemed eligible will receive initial funding and will then be expected to be self-sufficient.

“This is designed for good ideas that we’ve just never had money to do,” Kazee said.

Another development from last year is that the Japanese minor has been restored, although it was originally suspended after prioritization.

The program will be monitored, and if numbers increase, it will be reinstated for good. Kazee said there are no plans to cut any more programs but the board reserves the right to examine programs that are struggling.

Until enrollment numbers for the 2015–16 year are calculated in the fall, it is unknown if proposed budget cuts for next year will happen.

But Kazee said the outlook is positive, and both applications and admissions are up from previous years. If those numbers lead to more students, some of the eliminated faculty positions could be refilled. He also said the endowment has increased in recent years thanks to stock market growth.

“If we end up with a stronger enrollment year, that gives us more money to work with,” Kazee said. “I feel very good about where we are in the turnaround, but we have a lot of work to do.”

Rodd said the response to prioritization was typical of any school going through this process but that things have calmed down as details have been solidified. He said faculty is frustrated by the delay between the process and the decisions, but that might be because of how involved in the process faculty and others were.

“It hasn’t turned out the best for everyone,” Rodd said, “but at least it’s moving forward.”

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Crescent Magazine

Q&A

Questions Getting more students to attend and support athletic events is more about changing the culture of campus than trying to force promotion.

MARK SPENCER Athletics Director our population is student-athletes, so then you have the rest of the population.

photo by Kate Sarber

Q: What are your plans to try to increase

Q: What changes have you made to the athletics programs so far?

A: I’ve had to hire a new head coach.

That’s probably one of the biggest things most athletics directors do. I’ve also been meeting with people in the community. I’ve spoken to anyone who wants me to talk to them, and I’m getting an idea of what Evansville is all about. This is a special place. I want to make sure that the ideas I’m trying to implement have a chance of being successful.

Q: How does our sporting event attendance compare to other schools?

A: It’s on average with the national average of percentages. It’s just the number of people that’s low. We have 2,200 students; 240 of them are student-athletes. About 11 percent of

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April 2015

student attendance at events?

A: We know students are important to have at games, and we have student areas that always look empty. That’s not to say there aren’t students at the games. They just don’t always sit in the seats we give them. The most important thing is to address prospective students. If we can get them invested early, they can bring their friends. We’ve also been trying to reach out to a lot of campus student groups to find out what they want. Everyone wants us to look like Gonzaga and Duke, where the students are completely interactive.

But that didn’t happen overnight. You have to have a level of success. You have to have a core group of students to set that standard, and it can’t be the athletics department. If it’s not their idea, it’ll just move by the wayside.

Q: What is the difference in marketing different sports?

A: There’s a big difference. Some sports sell tickets; some don’t. And that’s where marketing and promotion are two different pieces.

With marketing, you’re trying to sell a product, so the types of posters you would distribute are going to be different because you’re going to try to drive traffic to a certain area.

We’re going to push for every event. We’re

coming up with a marketing and promotion plan that’s going to have one sport roll into the next. It’s with ticketed events that we put more money behind the promotion.

Q: How are you reaching out to the Evansville community?

A: We know there are a lot of entertainment options for everyone, but I also know this is not a community where a huge marketing barrage is going to work. These are blue-collar people that may be fans, but I’m trying to convert fans back into supporters.

Fans are people that may root for the Aces, but they don’t buy tickets anymore. We need to have more people, not the same people giving more money or the same people buying more tickets.

Q: How do you overcome the separation between athletes and nonathletes?

A: Student-athletes have different time constraints, so sometimes it’s easier for them to fall into their cliques. But if you look around campus, that’s no different from any other student. We try to be as inclusive as we can be to make sure the student-athletes are having a larger experience than just being student-athletes. They need to be a part of the community. This is the only school I’ve ever been to where student-athletes interact with the crowd postgame to say thank you for coming. It blows my mind how much outreach they do.

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Feature

Religion and female empowerment don’t always go hand-in-hand for most people, but that might be changing sooner versus later.

cracking the

Ceiling stained-glass RACHAEL MCGILL & HALEY ALBERS

W

hile the complete information might not have been in our textbooks or taught to us when we were growing up, women have always held an interesting place in history, especially when it came to spiritual matters. Religion has been used to both elevate and oppress women throughout the ages, but rarely have women been allowed to take a front seat in their own faith.

But the roles women play have undergone noticeable changes in recent years. With the resurgence of feminism and a bigger push for female leaders, women’s roles in various parts of society have been under the microscope, and the religious world is no exception.

“Overall, women’s voices are heard more, especially in the last 20 years,” Chaplain Tammy Gieselman said. “Technology has allowed some of that to happen. We now have more access to voices, so more voices are being heard.”

She said the church has always depended on women to facilitate its ministries, especially since women have been the primary teachers. And while women have always been involved behind-the-scenes, recently more and more are taking leadership positions within their respective faiths. A 2009 study

by Barna Group, an evangelical Christian polling firm, found that women made up only 5 percent of senior pastors in Protestant churches in the 1990s, but that figure doubled in the following 10 years. And the trend continues today.

The Catholic Church is a prime example of the changing roles of women within the church. Often criticized for failing to look after its female followers and those most committed to the church, the Vatican has been gradually shifting its attitudes about women.

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April 2015

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Sister Teresa Gunter, youth minister for St. Anthony Parish and vocations director for the Sisters of St. Benedict, Ferdinand, Ind., said she has noticed the growing presence of women leaders in the church, which has been welcomed by many, including herself.

“I’ve only seen the role of women grow and grow in my lifetime,”

“

It’s women who are continuing to practice and live out our faith.

she said. “In the past, a lot of the councils were made up of men. That’s simply not true now. I mean, we now have women presidents [of parish councils].”

It is women, Gunter said, not men, who make sure children take part in important religious milestones such as First Communion, because women’s roles within families have also changed. They take the lead in making sure their children are involved in the church versus following the directions of their husbands.

“When I see our parishes, I see more women present than men,” she said. “It’s women who are continuing to practice and live out our faith.”

Although women are still not able to be ordained as priests, they are able to participate in nearly every other aspect of Catholicism today.

“A lot of women are still considered to be second-class citizens, so I would like to see it as equal respect,” Gunter said. “[So] there are no longer gender roles in the Catholic Church.”

Women can be Eucharistic ministers, servers, lectors and lay ecclesial ministers who do everything from teaching the Church’s doctrine to preparing couples for marriage.

And as of 2005, Future Church, an organization that seeks changes that will give all Catholics the opportunity to participate fully in church life and leadership, reported that laywomen held 64 percent of the paid positions within the church. This is a growing trend across denominations. But problems still exist.

“There’s still what’s referred to as the stained-glass ceiling in the church, where women aren’t paid as much as men,” Gieselman said.

“That’s not exclusive to the [Methodist] Church, but it needs to change.”

In Protestantism, women have also been elevated to leadership positions, but that wasn’t always the case. Martin Luther said in 1520 that “all of us are priests, provided we are Christians,” and until 1560, women were conducting prayer meetings, christening children and preaching. But that all ended when church leaders changed their minds as to the level of involvement it would allow women to have.

As with other faiths, Protestant women fulfilled important church roles throughout the years, and women’s rights were gradually reintroduced in the 1900s, with the first Protestant woman pastor being officially ordained in 1930. Since then, the number of female pastors has grown steadily.

One branch of Protestantism with fairly relaxed rules is the Methodist Church. Until 1910, Methodist women were limited to preaching to just other women. Now, women are able to occupy the same positions as men. One in four Methodist pastors today is female, compared to in

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1972 when fewer than one in 100 women were pastors.

“In my own denomination, United Methodism, they did not ordain women until 1956,” Gieselman said. “We’ve made some positive strides in our leadership presence, and I think that presence has indicated there are talented and gifted women clergy serving our churches. I

April 2015

”

hope that helps everyone’s perspective broaden in terms of leadership in the church.”

Some non-Christian faiths have also taken the initiative to elevate the roles of women. Most Jews now celebrate a girl’s bat mitzvah, the female version of a bar mitzvah, when she is 12 or 13 years old. This allows girls to publicly read from the Torah, a practice that was not allowed in America before the early 20th century. Women can also be rabbis in some expressions of non-Orthodox Judaism.

Muslim women have also had their share of rising influence in their religious communities. Standards for women’s participation vary from faction to faction, but there has been an increase in what Muslim women may do in their faith communities as well. Women are now active in Quran study groups, fellowship activities, community service and Islamic education. In some mosques, women can now worship in the same room as men.

But not everything is changing. Although many religions have undergone some degree of change, many are still fundamentally the same and strive to stay true to their original ideology. There is controversy about how much change is too much, and some religions prefer to take a more conservative approach when it comes to topics like women’s ordination.

“The shift I see is on two different levels,” said the Rev. Sean Smith, associate pastor of the Lutheran Church of Our Redeemer. “Some are shifting to ‘women can do anything men can do in the congregation.’”

He said the second shift is a more conservative approach that puts a greater emphasis on staying true to Scripture. He said Missouri-Synod Lutheranism prefers to keep the tradition of male-only clergy because the church views the Scripture as literal.

With the pressure from society to implement change, Smith said some faiths might take it too far. No religion is free from society’s influence, but it is up to each faith to decide how much it will be affected.

He said that despite many denominations caving to these pressures, he feels his body of Lutheranism has no inclination to do the same.

“Secular pressures are ever-present in a whole host of issues,” he said.

For the most part, it seems as if religion is taking notice of society’s increasing focus on women and is doing what it can, although too slowly for some people’s tastes, to keep up with modern attitudes. Women are more active in their religious communities now than ever before, and their voices are slowly but surely being heard.

“Whether or not we can absolve sins,” Gunter said, “we are all called to forgive. You don’t have to be a priest to visit someone in prison or a hospital. If someone is hungry, feed them. We always assume, ‘Oh, the priests are going to do that.’ But we are all called to be priestly.”

27

Brian Bomb

OWL BY MYSELF The wisdom of the owl is something no one would dare dispute. Pop culture from “Harry Potter” to “Winnie the Pooh” recognizes the owl’s ability to answer age-old questions like “Why are we here?” or “How many licks does it take to get to the cen-

Owls have three eyelids on each eye. They close the upper one to blink and the lower one to sleep. The third eyelid, or nictitating membrane, is used for protecting and cleaning the eyes.

ter of a Tootsie Pop?” But it’s time to take a stand and break the stereotypes. There’s more to owls than their intelligence, and it’s high time we gave them the recognition they deserve.

In Tokyo, you can visit an owl cafe — and by cafe, they mean “place to go and play with owls” since they don’t offer any food and not much to drink either. But there are lots of owls. Sounds like a hoot!

You thought garlic breath was bad? The great horned owl eats skunks. It’s the only type of owl to regularly do so. Let’s hope he eats a lot of breath mints too.

Because they cannot move their eyes, owls are able to rotate their head 270 degrees. Freaky.

What does the owl say? Contrary to popular belief, not every owl makes a “who” sound.

They can also make many other sounds, such as whistling, barking, hissing and growling. Who knew?

Forget cats. Some barn owl families eat up to 1,000 mice every year. With their keen nocturnal senses, they can find mice even in complete darkness.

Owls can only digest the soft parts of the animals they eat, but they eat the whole thing anyway. The parts they can’t digest are compacted into a pellet inside their stomach and coughed back up. Yum. Owls are usually seen alone. But when in a group, they are referred to as a parliament. What a wise decision.

Owls have zygodactyl feet, meaning two of their toes face forward while the other two face backward. Their talons are also extremely sharp so they can better pick up and grasp their prey. Better to kill you with, my dear.

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Both the Greek and Roman goddesses of wisdom, Pallas Athene and Minerva, were often pictured in the company of an owl.

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Crescent Magazine

Who Knew?

WHICH DINOSAUR TASTED THE BEST? Dinosaurs: the other white meat. Or maybe not.

Research has actually shown that most land dinosaurs would have been more similar to cows, not birds, and their meat would have been red.

But to find out which one would have made the most delectable dish, scientists studied what kinds of meat consumers most enjoy today compared with the diets and behaviors of different dinosaurs. They concluded that ostrich-like ornithomimosaurs would have made the best meal.

But you’d have to catch them first.

WHO’S THE RICHEST CHARACTER? Disney’s Scrooge McDuck is the richest fictional character, with a net worth of $65.4 billion, according to Forbes. He has never spent any of his money, so he still has every dollar he has ever earned. Smaug from “The Hobbit” comes in at a close second, with $54.1 billion — or the equivalent in gold — and Carlisle Cullen from the

IF A TREE FALLS IN THE FOREST...

Would it make a sound? Technically, no. It’d make sound waves, but to become sound, they have to be perceived.

There’s a sound answer for you.

WHAT’S BEHIND

GETTING FIRED? In some ancient civilizations, in order to get rid of an unwanted member of society, a group would burn down the person’s house, forcing him to leave, hence the term “get fired.”

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“Twilight” series takes third with $46 billion. Shows what a little saving — and 343 years of collecting interest — can do. Santa Claus used to take the highest spot, with a fortune that could only be labeled as “infinite,” until Forbes started getting letters from angry children insisting that Santa was not fictional.

HOW DO CATS LAND? Cats usually land on their feet because of natural reflexes. And they’re actually sometimes better off falling from higher spots because then they have more time to correct their course.

THAT WOODCHUCK CHUCKED WHAT? About 22 cubic inches of wood a day. That’s right. Researchers supposedly did a 12-day study to find the answer. But the study can only be found in the Annals of Improbable Research, so we’ll leave you to draw your own conclusions about that tidbit of information.

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Sexual Tension

MARISA PATWA

SETTING THE

RECORD STRAIGHT

Many believe myths without a second thought, and it’s time to change that.

W

omen never watch porn, but they admit that penis size does matter to them. Double-bagging condoms is extra insurance against pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections. Oral sex is safer than vaginal or anal sex.

Sex myths. Most are far-fetched and not based on fact, but many people still believe them.

“I think a lot of people are very uncomfortable talking about sex, and from that they don’t want to go and ask,” said Jamie Adams-Kemper, health education coordinator. “We go with what our friends are talking about or Google the first thing that comes up instead.”

Some of the answers to the most common myths may seem obvious, but here are the facts on just a few. z Women never watch porn. There are a lot of women who hate porn, but one in three adults browsing Internet porn sites are women, according to Nielsen ratings. In fact, in 2007 it was found that almost 13 million women were watching porn on a monthly basis.

What is different is the type of porn women like to watch. A 2008 study discussed in a New York Times article found that women showed signs of arousal watching pretty much anything except for pictures of naked men.

And a 2013 Pew Research Center study found that millennials watch the most porn — 57 percent of respondents who reported enjoying porn solo were aged 18–24. z Penis size matters to women. While many men obsess over how they measure up, there is still debate on whether or not penis size actually matters to women.

Men are concerned about their penis size just as they are concerned about their social status, height, intelligence and other traits they think women find attractive.

Men believe they need to impress their partners.

But in a 2012 study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, 60 percent of the female respondents said penis size made no difference to them. But the study also revealed some women experience more orgasms when their partner has a longer penis.

Adams-Kemper said penis size is a preference someone might consider in a mate just like any other trait.

“We all vary in what we are attracted to in others,” she said. “Some people like different hair colors or body sizes. The same goes for penis sizes.”

Adams-Kemper said physically, a bigger penis may be

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painful for some women, and if it causes discomfort, sex will not be as enjoyable. And while penis size may or may not affect the satisfaction of a man’s partner, a larger penis is more psychologically satisfying for men. z Double-bagging condoms is more protective.

Some people put two condoms on at one time because they believe it will provide them with double the protection. In reality, it provides them with much less.

“It’s not only not safer but increases the chances of both condoms breaking,” said senior Mary Wallace, a nursing major. “Condoms were made to withstand the vaginal environment, not to withstand the environment of latex or sheepskin.”

Wallace said wearing two condoms at once also increases the chances of the condoms slipping off and getting pushed inside the woman’s vagina. This is dangerous because it can go unnoticed by the woman, and if it is left in the vagina for too long, it could lead to yeast infections. If that happens, it should be treated using antibiotics that might make birth control ineffective. z Oral sex is safer than vaginal or anal sex. People often think they have a lower chance of getting a STI through oral sex over vaginal or anal sex. But almost all STIs can be passed through unprotected oral sex just as they can through unprotected vaginal or anal sex.

“STIs can be transmitted to any mucus membrane, so oral sex carries just as high a risk for STIs as does any other type of sex,” said Kathryn Lever, associate professor of nursing. “You could actually have oral herpes and transmit the herpes virus via oral sex to other parts of the body.”

Consequently, oral sex can lead to getting a STI. “The only way that oral sex is safer than penis and vagina sex is that you cannot get pregnant,” Wallace said. “In fact, the rates of oral herpes and throat cancer have skyrocketed in the last 20 years. People end up getting HPV or genital warts in their mouth and don’t realize it until it is too late.”

Ultimately, when people believe myths, they have a higher chance of being unsafe in their sexual practices.

“Students should reach out to [healthcare professionals], especially about sex,” Adams-Kemper said. “Those people are used to talking about it and will make you feel comfortable so you can too.”

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campus crime

The following information was compiled from criminal offense reports filed Feb. 18–March 24 in Safety & Security.

March 21– Male student found intoxicated on Brentano Hall second floor. Referred to the vice president for Student Affairs for disciplinary action.

March 17 – PS4 gaming system and video games stolen from a Walnut Commons townhouse. Loss reported at $470.

March 13 – Two jackets stolen from the UE Bookstore. Loss reported at $113.90.

March 8 – Three students found intoxicated on Schroeder Hall third floor. Referred to the vice president for Student Affairs for disciplinary action.

Feb. 23 – Orange Safety & Security cone stolen from G-lot. Loss not reported.

Feb. 22– Two students observed intoxicated entering Schroeder Hall and then found on the second floor. Referred to the vice president for Student Affairs for disciplinary action.

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WHAT HAPPENS AT

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BE SMART. BE NICE. BE SAFE. Crescent Magazine

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April 2015

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Full-Court Press

Punishing baseball players for PED use is important, but educating student-athletes is what really matters.

RISKING IT ALL FOR

AN EDGE IAN HESLINGER

M

any think performance-enhancing drugs only affect professional athletes. But this is a problem that is affecting others as well.

Trying to get ahead, 17-year-old high school baseball player Taylor Hooton turned to steroids to bulk up. He eventually stopped using them, but the damage was done, as withdrawal caused the depression that led to his suicide. Now, Hooton’s father educates youth on PEDs, using his son as an example.

“The Steroid Era,” which ran from the late 1980s through the late 2000s, forever linked PEDs to baseball. But even now, players are still using them and many feel the sport has been forever tarnished, creating apathy about PED use. But their use still matter.

“It’s not just about pros,” Don Hooton told NBC News. “It’s about our kids. It’s about Taylor and hundreds of thousands of kids.”

The Taylor Hooton Foundation tries to stop PED use. While strides have been made, America’s youth are still using PEDs, especially anabolic steroids. According to the foundation, 1.5 million teens use them, and this number could be much larger since many teens do not admit to using them. But PEDs are still out there and fairly easy to get.

In a recent Monitoring the Future study, 40 percent of high school seniors said they believed steroids were easy to obtain. And it is true. It takes seconds to find them online.

But what makes student-athletes, especially baseball players, take the plunge? The answer is simple: They dream of playing in the majors, then watch what their role models do and find ways to emulate them.

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Whether they like it or not, it’s time for Major League Baseball players to accept the role they play in society, especially concerning impressionable youth and PEDs. “I believe there is an inherent responsibility of being a role model,” Jay Hoffman, chair of health and exercise science at the College of New Jersey, told NBC News. “Whether they want it or not, it comes with the territory.”

Two surveys conducted in 2013 by the Digital Citizens Alliance found 77.5 percent of males ages 14–25 think pro athletes’ steroid use affects youth. Only 11.5 percent of those males did not feel pressured to use them, and 18.9 percent believe it is the only way to succeed in pro sports. Tom Galvin, DCA executive director, knows the problem all too well.

“For every [Milwaukee Brewers rightfielder] Ryan Braun, there may be thousands of young athletes taking steroids and risking their health in hopes of excelling on their high school team, their college team or making it in pro sports,” he said. “They look at their heroes, too many of whom have turned to PEDs to enhance their performance, and conclude that taking these dangerous drugs is the only way to fame and fortune.”

Advocates of PEDs say MLB should legalize them to level the playing field, but then players would probably turn to even riskier substances. And saying PEDs are worth the rewards sends a dangerous message to young athletes, many of whom are not mature enough to understand the health risks.

“Across society we are sending signals to our children that these drugs are OK,” Hooton told Fox Sports. “I just don’t accept

that this stuff can ever be made safe.”

Society’s message needs to change. In an effort to do just that, The Hooton Foundation teamed up with Little League last year to stress prevention.

“Educating adults is critical so they can teach and influence the young people in their care before bad decisions are made and bad habits are formed,” Hooton told Brian McClintock, director of Media Relations for Little League.

Youth safety should be a top priority.

With education, student-athletes can learn safer ways to enhance performance. Leagues are also enforcing stricter rules to punish users.

MLB players believe about 10 percent of players are using PEDs, according to an ESPN study, which is a decline from recent years.

“The awareness has gotten better each year,” one player said. “Players realize they’re not going to get away with it. The system has worked, and the players who were on the fence aren’t doing it.”

Former MLB commissioner Bud Selig called for more testing after a report said players would die if he did not take action. MLB is trying to send a message — that PED users will get caught and will suffer severe consequences. While punishment is a good tactic, it cannot be the only one.

PED users at all levels should be punished, but being healthy should be stressed to youth in order to prevent use in the first place. Punishing players is critical, but it is not the most important thing. Stories like Hooton’s should not happen. If the health of society’s youth is not the main concern, all is lost.

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Athletes in Action

KATE SARBER

HEY BATTER Welcome to the strike zone.

The Aces are in the third of a six-game home stand, taking on Missouri State at 6 p.m. April 10 at Braun Stadium for the first of three games this weekend against the Bears. Then they play SIU-Edwardsville at 6 p.m. April 14. The Aces began MVC play last month when they faced nationally ranked Dallas Baptist.. They lost 2-of-3, but left-handed pitcher Brodie Harkness went a career-high eight innings, giving up just one unearned run on four hits. Centerfielder Kevin Kaczmarski continues to lead UE with his team-high batting average. A candidate for the 2015 Senior CLASS Award, let’s hope when the 10 finalists are announced this month that Kaczmarski’s name is among them. Nationwide voting will then take place.

With warm weather on the rise, head over to Braun and spend some time cheering on the Aces.

Looking for the double play, second baseman Stewart Nelson turns to first after tagging Dallas Baptist second baseman Drew Turbin. | MaKayla Seifert

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Pitcher Brodie Harkness earns UE its only win in the series as he prepares to send another Patriots batter back to the dugout. | Willian Mallmann

Centerfielder Kevin Kaczmarski singles but never makes it home during UE’s lopsided loss to nationally ranked Dallas Baptist. He goes 2–5 against the Patriots in the second game of the series, scoring in the ninth. | MaKayla Seifert

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Overtime

photo by Kate Sarber

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IAN HESLINGER

THE GRIP OF SUCCESS Being intense, focused and motivated helps Kayla Katterhenry in her winning ways.

G

ripping a golf club is different from gripping a softball bat.

With a club, you grip it with both hands and place your little finger between the index and middle finger on your lead hand. With a bat, you line up your door-knocking knuckles of both hands. Those who play collegiate softball rarely play collegiate golf for just that reason, since it’s hard to switch up and master the grips.

But sophomore Kayla Katterhenry grew up playing both sports, and as UE’s top women’s golfer, she grips her club with a 10-fingered softball-style grip instead of overlapping her hands, which is how golfers are taught. This is just one way Katterhenry sets herself apart as a golfer, and it has proven to work for her.

In her first collegiate season, she averaged a team-best 76.08 per round, posting the lowest season stroke average in program history and second in the MVC for the season. Katterhenry is the third player in program history to win a tournament and only the second to win multiple tournaments in a season. She also earned a coveted spot on the women’s golf all-MVC team and was named the MVC Newcomer of the Year, a first for a UE women’s golfer.

“It was a great privilege,” Katterhenry said, “and I was very honored to receive the award. It gave me a lot of confidence.”

This confidence is apparent when she is on a course. Coach Jim Hamilton believes some players fear winning, but not Katterhenry.

“She knows how to win,” he said, “and that’s hard to do in golf.

Coming down the stretch, she can be a force at the end of a tournament.

She won’t back up. She’s never afraid to keep going.”

Hamilton and Katterhenry have a special relationship since he has been her swing coach for 10 years. Many of Katterhenry’s family also attended UE, and Hamilton was another reason why she chose UE. “It just seemed fitting to stay around home and play golf for him,” Katterhenry said. “He is like family.”

The Newburgh, Ind., native comes from a family of athletes, and she was encouraged to play several sports when she was younger. But golf has been her favorite since she was 6 years old.

“My dad took me to a par-3 course,” Katterhenry said. “He put a club in my hand, and I just fell in love with it.”

After years of playing, her favorite achievement so far is winning the 2011 Indiana State Junior Championship. Playing for Castle High School, she trailed her top-seed rival heading into the final day of the championship, when she rallied to win by one stroke.

Even in high-pressure situations, Katterhenry manages to stay calm.

“I just focus on one hole at a time and try to play little games with myself in my head to try to beat myself on each hole,” she said.

Preparation plays a role as well. She likes to focus on whatever part of her game is weak. She said golfers need to be mature enough to work on their own flaws due to the individual nature of the game.

Katterhenry sometimes asks Hamilton to open the Auxiliary Support Facility at 7 a.m. so she can practice before classes. She does whatever she can to improve, including lifting weights on her days off.

While golf is played individually, the bond between teammates is still critical. They play putting and chipping games with one another, having a good time while working on their form. Katterhenry does her best to help her teammates, which means being a motivator during tournaments.

“She’s such a supportive teammate, no matter how we score,” senior Dana Hayden said. “She’s always positive and looks on the bright side.”

As a sophomore, Katterhenry is already a leader. Hayden has sought her help and said she is the go-to teammate when in need.

“I think she’s a leader by example,” Hamilton said. “I would say she’s very well respected by her teammates. She’s very supportive, very encouraging. People enjoy playing with her.”

Hayden said Katterhenry is intense about the game but is also a caring person. Since the two are local products, they competed against each other before coming to UE. “There was this one time we were playing in Henderson (Ky.),” Hayden recalled. “I was in eighth grade, and she was in sixth grade, and it was so miserably hot. We were trying to make it through, trying to make each other laugh. That’s something I’ll never forget.”

Katterhenry’s self-motivation continues to make a difference. She remains the top women’s golfer this season. She finished first at the Nichols Intercollegiate, fourth at the Benbow Intercollegiate, and hit a holein-one on her way to finishing second at the Samford Intercollegiate last month. And while it is too early to really think about life after graduation, the business management major doesn’t plan to give up golf.

“I’d like to continue playing golf and get on [the Symetra Tour, the developmental golf tour of the LPGA] after college,” she said. “I know if I don’t try, I’ll regret it when I’m older.”

Wherever her path leads, Katterhenry has all the tools to handle that road. That is evident by how she has come to grips with success.

“She’s been a pleasure to coach and to teach for all the time that I’ve known her,” Hamilton said. “She works hard. She’s very deserving of everything she’s achieved.”

She knows how to win, and that’s hard to do in golf.

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A Closer Look

photo by Kate Sarber

A VARIED LIFE CHRIS NORRIS

V

ariety is the spice of life. Even doing something you love can get tiresome. For William Baer, professor of creative writing, this means not limiting himself to one genre of writing.

“If all you are is a poet, what if you’re burned out on writing poetry?” he said.

Baer will be retiring from UE in May and will move to a log cabin near his family on Packanack Lake in Wayne, N.J. He plans to spend his time eating pizza and chocolate, writing and hanging out with his family and friends. He said the extra free time will allow him to write everything he never had time to.

Baer jokes that he writes everything except pornography and creative nonfiction. His long list of works includes noir novels, a collection of ballads, a poetry textbook and a musical based on Jane Austen’s “Persuasion.” He was inspired early on by Edgar Allen Poe’s poetry and short stories and his own family’s theater background.

This early interest led Baer to earn degrees from Rutgers, NYU, Johns Hopkins, USC and South Carolina.

Despite being so sure of writing, Baer said

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“

he only became a teacher after he had spent so much time in school and realized he enjoyed it. It became a full-time job when he got married and decided to settle down, which led him to UE, where he has influenced his colleagues in a variety of ways.

“I just learned how to be responsible and conscientious about the work and the students,” said Chair Paul Bone, associate professor of creative writing.

The main thing Baer tries to emphasize to students is that even though writing is an art, it is also a profession, and there is a right and wrong way of doing it. This means being honest with his students when critiquing work.

“I’m kind of like a coach who is also an editor,” Baer said. “I’m from the Bronx, and I don’t lie.”

Bone said he sees Baer’s style as being in the students’ best interest, as it teaches them how to listen to criticism. He also said Baer really cares for his students and doesn’t pick favorites based on their abilities.

“It’s not out of meanness,” Bone said. “He’s honest. And whether or not you agree with him, you have to admire his honesty.”

The other thing Baer wants students to realize is the “sheer pleasure” of writing.

“It is, from my point of view, to use the silly little word, fun,” he said. “It’s just one of the greatest things you can do, to create fictional worlds and fictional people and have things happen.”

For Baer, that fun is what compels him to write. He said he feels blessed that he has been able to follow the path he has.

“To be honest about it, I’ve enjoyed every single thing I’ve done with writing,” he said.

Outside of writing, Baer has a list of interests that is as varied as his portfolio. He loves watching noir movies and romantic comedies in equal measure. He follows sports and has always been involved with music, whether playing in a band, writing songs or seeing everyone from Frank Sinatra to Shakira in concert.

“You’re always surprised,” Bone said. “He’ll know something you didn’t think he would know, like who Taylor Swift is.”

Baer is full of ideas, and even in retirement, he won’t stop coming up with more.

“When I die in my log cabin, there will be a huge list of upcoming projects,” Baer said.

To be honest about it, I’ve enjoyed every single thing I’ve done with writing.

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A Closer Look photo by Kate Sarber

ENDLESS ENERGY ANNA SHEFFER

K

ooky and professional are two characteristics that do not seem to go together. But those who know Margaret McMullan, professor of creative writing, know she shares insights about the writing industry and wacky stories in equal measure.

“She has the most beautiful out-of-context sentences,” senior Rebecca Armstrong said. “I tweet them all the time.”

McMullan will be retiring from UE in May and will go on to serve as a mentor for Stony Brook Southampton’s MFA program in New York. Her decision to leave UE will certainly leave a void that will not be easily filled.

“I’m happy for Margaret, that she’s able to retire, on a personal level,” said Rob Griffith, professor of creative writing, “but I can’t help but realize that on a departmental level, we’re diminished.”

A native of Newton, Miss., McMullan got her start in journalism. She initially worked for a small weekly newspaper while on summer breaks in college and later went on to write for the women’s magazine Glamour before accepting her teaching position with UE in 1990.

She also eventually wrote a column for Evans-

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ville Living with her husband, Pat O’Connor.

McMullan said being a journalist instilled in her a discipline for deadlines and taught her how to entice readers. She enjoyed the instant gratification of writing articles, which was much more immediate than writing novels.

“I liked that challenge of getting in and getting out in a certain amount of words,” she admitted.

McMullan has published six award-winning novels since 1994 and numerous short stories and essays. Her most recent publication, “Every Father’s Daughter,” is a collection of essays she edited that is out now. She is also currently in the drafting stage of a new novel.

McMullan said while she never thought she would become a teacher, and admits to making mistakes along the way, she knows she has grown as a professor.

“I believe in the morality of teaching,” she said. “If you know something, you’re morally obligated to teach it to people.”

McMullan has been a favorite of many students over the years. Armstrong said despite her carefree personality, it is evident that she is serious about her teaching and her students.

“She takes everyone seriously,” she said, “as a student, a person and an artist.”

In her courses, McMullan is famous for drawing plot diagrams and acting out scenes, using different voices in her light Southern accent to help students visualize a story.

Armstrong said McMullan’s in-class demonstrations, coupled with the feedback she gives, make her a great professor.

“She has this knack for seeing good in everything, which I think is important in a creative field,” Armstrong said.

McMullan is dedicated to her work, no matter what form it takes. Griffith said he admires the way she throws herself into everything she does with seemingly boundless energy. He finds McMullan’s good-natured personality refreshing.

“It’s not easy to find a colleague and a friend as good as her,” he said.

Just because McMullan is leaving UE and moving on to new adventures doesn’t mean she will stop caring for students.

“I will always be teaching somebody something,” she said, with a smile and a laugh, “whether they want it or not.”

She takes everyone seriously, as a student, a person and an artist.

April 2015

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Off the Wall

DOTM

GOTTA GET IT

YJ Moyu puzzle cube – next level in puzzling Remember the Rubik’s Cube? How you would spend minutes messing up the colors, then spend days trying to get it back to normal? Well, now you can relive those days, and relive them for years to come. The 13X13X13 PUZZLE CUBE is the same multi-colored cube that you know, love and hate, but with more than four times the number of blocks to mess up and spend years correcting.

The innovative minds at YJ Moyu, a top puzzle cube designer and manufacturer in China, have created this exponential improvement upon the old puzzle cube design to

supply the ultimate challenge. Weighing in at roughly 6 pounds, this is no child’s toy. This is a true test meant for bold, enduring minds to tackle. It can also be used to make your friends scream in rage and agony when they inevitably get stuck working on it.

Coming in at the dirt-cheap price of $335, this puzzle is available from amazon. com with free shipping. Your friends will applaud you for your mental brilliance and skill for completing this mammoth of a Rubik’s Cube. Just don’t lose your mind when you get stuck with only two blocks out of place.

If you can’t get enough food, EVERNOTE FOOD is the app for you. Finding restaurants and storing recipes are the app’s main features. It can also save pictures of your greatest creations so you can brag to your friends.

TIDBIT

Always forget to pack something? THE STOW 2 app can help you remember everything you need for that deserved vacation. It gives templates for various types and lengths of trips. It’ll come in handy when you need a break.

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Ever wish you could time travel? The 12-MILE LIMIT lets you drink like you’re from the ‘20s.

Created for rebels during Prohibition, you may look classy drinking this cocktail, but you probably won’t feel like it when you’re done. According to COLD-GLASS.COM, shake white rum, rye whiskey, brandy, grenadine and lemon juice in an iced cocktail shaker. Then strain it into a well-chilled cocktail glass and garnish with a lemon twist. Few remember Prohibition, and you won’t be able to remember much either after a few of these.

ingredients: 1 oz. white rum | 1/2 oz. rye whiskey | 1/2 oz. brandy | 1/2 oz. grenadine | 1/2 oz. fresh lemon juice

THERE’S an APP for THAT

Ariel’s father is Triton, the son of Poseidon.

Hercules’ father is Zeus, who is Poseidon’s brother. So Ariel and Hercules are first cousins once removed.

12-mile limit

heard it here “Spring is nature’s way of saying, ‘Let’s party!’”

That cardboard sleeve around your coffee cup has a name. It’s actually called a zarf, which comes from the Arabic word meaning container.

—comedian Robin Williams

The blood of the horseshoe crab is worth $60,000 a gallon. This is because it is used to test for bacterial contamination in medicines and vaccines.

April 2015

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people tweet the damndest things Like, I’ve always had this intense fear of throwing up on TV, but now in the age of the GIF it would be particularly problematic.

@johngreen We should be thanking Apple for launching the $10,000 “Apple watch” as the new gold standard in douche bag detection.

@AnnaKendrick47 One way to get more people to look at your online dating profile is to wear a black and blue dress that looks white and gold.

@badbanana If someone dies in your presence how do you prove you didn’t murder them? Asking for a friend who is no longer with us.

@JimGaffigan Just bought both volumes of James Taylor’s greatest hits because I’m trying to turn my vagina into a pile of crumpled receipts for lobster rolls.

@jennyslate Woke up sweaty from a dream in which my shrink confessed to me she kept a pet raccoon. Today is going to be great.

Things that make us Crazy IS SPRING IN THE AIR?

TIME TO LET IT GO

Spring is here, which means opening the windows to try and survive until the air conditioner kicks in. But instead of the sweet sounds of bird song on the soft spring breeze, it’s often stagnant, sticky air and bugs abusing their outside voices. Giving Mother Nature a chance seemed like such a good idea at first, but at the cost of sanity? Maybe not.

When “Frozen” came out in 2013, every Disney fan went into hysteria. Now no one can say, “For the first time in…,” or, “Let it go,” without someone starting a musical number. It’s been more than a year, and still no one has moved on. This is no fever; it’s an epidemic.

But since a sequel is in the works, it might be a while before this finally thaws out.

DEATH OF THE MEME

TEENAGE DYSTOPIA STORIES

Scrolling through your social media sites of choice, you’re bound to see at least one old meme that people are somehow still laughing at. Doge, Willy Wonka, #thedress. Let it die. The joke is old now; let it pass with dignity. Such is the cycle. But since commenting on it might seem a little pretentious, there’s not much to do but block the post and hit refresh.

The world as we know it is gone, replaced by a totalitarian government that must be rebelled against — and who better to lead the rebellion than attractive angsty teenagers? Face it: teenage dystopia is the new vampire novel. It’s hip to be post-apocalyptic. But after years of seeing hormonal, acne-coated heroes, impending political doom just gets annoying.

@julieklausner

REMEMBER WHEN... …chicken nuggets, macaroni and cheese and chocolate pudding with star-shaped sprinkles was your favorite meal? KID CUISINE was the staple of every ‘90s child’s diet. These frozen, packaged dinners may not have been the healthiest meals to eat, but parents have been popping them in the microwave for the last 25 years and children still enjoy munching on them today. …your entire social life revolved around how big your SIM’S house was? The Sims is a video game series that simulates real life. Users can create their own virtual Sims characters and navigate them through daily life near the fictional SimCity. The Sims are not as popular as they were in the early 2000s, but they still live on, confused by bathroom-less houses and speaking total gibberish. …flipping to Cartoon Network meant you might get psychologically scarred for life? COURAGE THE COWARDLY DOG was an animated horror comedy that aired from 1999 to 2002. It followed the adventures of Courage, a dog, and his owners Muriel and Eustace Bagge in the fictional Nowhere, Kan. Courage was often stuck saving his oblivious owners from demons, zombies, aliens and other monsters. It is safe to say this show creeped out every child who watched it. …Barbie and Bratz were no longer the coolest dolls in town? POLLY POCKET dolls were tiny plastic dolls you could mix and match with cute rubber clothing. Unlike the Barbie, Polly Pocket was small enough that you could sneak her into your lunchbox at school and take her out to play with at recess.

And if you got caught with one, well, you could always hide it in your pocket.

Cosmopolitan magazine used to publish new fiction from authors like Kurt Vonnegut and H.G. Wells, and the cover was usually illustrated.

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April 2015

Several melons auditioned to be the sound effect for the famous stabbing scene in “Psycho.” The one that got the part was the casaba melon.

Although many of Stephen King’s novels are set in Maine, it is actually the second safest state to live in, with a low violent crime rate.

The earliest written recipe for cheesecake is from Greece. Cheesecake was served to the athletes competing in the very first Olympics.

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Motley Crew

Talking to people I don’t know is about as fun and easy as pulling out my own teeth.

DON’T LEAVE ME

TONGUE-TIED ANNA SHEFFER

I

am awkward. There, I said it. No matter how I may try to cover it up with goofy voices, a big vocabulary and self-deprecating snark, small talk is not my forte.

Like many introverts, if you ask me about something I’m interested in — cats, classic literature or dislocated eyeballs — I’ll talk your ear off. But stick me in the corner at a party with someone I’ve just met, and I will mangle even the simplest exchange of, “Hi, how are you?”

Case in point: My sophomore year, there was a guy in two of my classes who was ClarkKent-plus-Ryan-Gosling hot. I was walking outside Olmsted Hall one afternoon, and I saw him coming toward me.

A socially competent person might just smile and wave, but I panicked. I didn’t know him that well. Should I wave? Should I avoid eye contact and pretend I didn’t see him?

I was pretty set on the latter, but as he approached me, he made eye contact and waved.

This was fine. I could handle this.

But then he stopped. He started asking me about my classes. I managed to give a few simple, one-word answers. It was going better than expected. Then he asked me what I was reading in my literature class.

My mind went blank. It was like someone had unplugged my brain. “Duhhhhhhhh,” was all I could say. He stared at me, probably wondering if I’d forgotten English.

If this were an isolated incident, I could handle it. And to my credit, I like to think there are moments where I seem witty or maybe even — dare I say it? — charming. But there are also plenty of moments where I crash

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and burn. And given the relative frequency of these moments, I’m a little surprised my friends haven’t yet kicked me to the curb.

Even without words, my talent for making conversation awkward is unmatched. The first time I visited my best friend’s house, I inhaled half a glass of water laughing at something and wound up almost vomiting on his kitchen floor. As if this weren’t embarrassing enough, his Cantonese-speaking grandmother was watching me the whole time.

I could almost feel the judgment radiating from her stare as I gagged over the linoleum.

It’s because of anecdotes like these that I have to be careful. When wandering around the outside world, there are many dangers.

Wal-Mart cashiers, former classmates and servers in Cafe Court are all land mines of potential conversation. The list is basically endless.

I get through it all by keeping my mouth shut, nodding my head or giving a half-smile and a sort-of laugh to people who might be talking to me. And I’m not always sure when they actually are. I’ve been known to stare into space for a solid minute before answering questions that were clearly directed at me.

When I do take the risk and talk to people, I admittedly don’t know what constitutes polite, normal conversation. I’ve been known to use icebreakers such as “Did you know fruit is just ripened plant ovaries?” and “If your eye sockets are too shallow, your eyeball can actually fall out of your head.” I think this stuff is interesting, but many times, others do not share my enthusiasm.

Strangers would probably rather just hear about me. But I don’t like to talk about my-

self. I’d much rather give you a profanity-laced summary of “The Great Gatsby” than tell you about my hobbies.

It’s not bad in classes or when I’m doing interviews for Crescent Magazine. In those cases, I know what I’m going to say. I have prepared questions, and I’m fairly confident the conversation isn’t going to jump to deeply personal questions about my hopes and fears.

I just have to keep quiet, take notes and occasionally speak up when something occurs to me. There’s no awkward silence to languish in when I don’t have anything to say.

In the short term, my awkwardness around those I don’t know causes me embarrassment in social situations. In the long term, I have this deep-seated fear that it will impact my job prospects. How am I supposed to find a job if I don’t know how to network? Schmoozing with potential employers feels like I’m making a sales pitch for a used car — impersonal, insincere and ignoring blatant shortcomings in the product.

I’m graduating in a month. How am I supposed to engage in small talk and keep my wits about me in the real world, where one word I say could make the difference in me having a budding career or being homeless?

I don’t know the answer to this question.

And even if I did, I probably couldn’t communicate it to you. But I try to find comfort in the fact that somewhere there have to be functioning adult people who hate small talk just as much as I do. Hell, people like Jerry Seinfeld have made careers out of being awkward.

If they can do it, maybe I can. Even if it’s just one “duhh” at a time.

April 2015

•

Crescent Magazine

RYAN EBERSOLE, ‘10

with husband, Jessie Swimming & Diving | Doctoral student, SUNY–Albany

KAREN VAUGHN-KAJMOWICZ, ‘94 with wife, Tammy, and family Women’s Basketball | Sgt., Evansville Police Department

ABBY GASKINS, ‘03

President, PRIDE | Self-employed Food Stylist

WIL FERNANDEZ, ‘11

Swimming & Diving | Real Estate Associate Broker

BETH CSUKAS, ‘01

ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE IF YOU ARE BRAVE ENOUGH

Women’s Soccer & Softball | Firefighter/EMT, Evansville Fire Department

JOSH FLETCHER, ‘10

Swimming & Diving | Administrator, University of Georgia

TSAGL.org | For more information, email wallypaynter@aol.com or call 812.480.0204

TRI-STATE

ALLIANCE KEITH WEST-HARRISON, ‘93

Resident Assistant | Co-Owner, Urban Fresh Cosmetics

noh8campaign.com

Serving the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender communities of the region since 1980

Youth group for LGBT students under age 21 and their straight-supportive friends meets at 7 p.m. each Saturday at the TSA office, 501 John St. Suite 5, Evansville.

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