Ultra Vires Vol 4 Issue 5: 2003 February

THE INDEPENDENT STUDENT NEWSPAPER OF THE UNIVERSITY OF TORONTO FACULTY OF LAW

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u tra vzres VOLUME 4 ISSUE 5

SINCE 1999

WWW.ULTRAVIRES.CA

FEBRUARY 11, 2003

Students look forw~rd to V~lentine's D~y

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Students stunned by cap on clerkship applications Court of Appeal eliminates U ofT exception

BY BERN INA BUTT \ recenr pohcy decision of the Courr o f AppL'lll for Ont:~rio to hmit the nu"?ber .o f ckrkshap applications from rhe l ' nwcrsl(y of Toronto foaculty of Law has lefr both mtcrested students and J\ssistant Dean of Can.:er Services Ronnie (;olJbcrg feeling ~hortchanged.

(~oiJbcrg also sraunchl) contests the court's a'1,'Umcnt that the enforccmcn_t c:: che rule "shouldn't ha\·c comt· as a suCJ?nsc.

In past years, II was the court's pracncc to send a letter detailing the apphcatton procedure. \ftcr the receipt of the documt·nt, there \\,IS a usually an exchange by phone bel\n·cn ( ; 0 JJberg and the court.

• ottcing the absence of correspondence this ) car, and having heard that the court might reyuesl letters from De~n Ron Damcls ru accompany apphcattons, c;olJbcrg called asking for clarification, but receJ\ ed no response. On Jan. 2-l, the dead·

\lison \'\'arner, a staff lawyer at the court, insists that an order to fill the twche clerbhlp positions, "fiftc.:cn candtdart·s from L~lch law school is a more than large enough pool for {the court! w ,cJecr from.'' \\arner note , "Smce 2<Xll. we ha\ c askc.:d all of the Ia\\ schools m Ontano ro hmir the number of applications that rhey send to the court to fifteen candidates. \\'e arc of the' i~.:w that the schools have better kno\\ ledge anu resources to do this \Citing process than uocs the court." <..:.u\dberv,, hov.cvcr, hokh a very dlffcr<nt •'leu l mil th1s }C".dr, U ofT h;~s nlw':llS ol5k«f for, .w<f been gr-.U1Ct'tl, .In c:xcepnon /me for rht• applications, a clerk at the court from the lirrut. \rgues Goldberg, "Thi~ contacted Goldberg, and a "heated debate" reflects {tht· courr'sJ unJcrstandmg of the ahour tht• discontinuance of the exception num!x·r of our applicants and their calibre." ensued. \ ftt:r chc decision \\:as finali7.ed, ~he IS Jisappomted that the court is "not Goldberg c-mailed students tnforming them willing ro cnrcnain the excepoon an}morc,'' rhat only fifteen applicanons were being fora feeling due, in parocular, to her "bdtef in warded. the stellar abilities of our students."

In selecting the fifteen applicanrs, the Goldberg "hope[sJ that they succeed (or arc Clcrksh1p committee used the criteria estabg~ven an opportunit) to succeed) in whatevhsht·J by the court, namely students' traner they wish to undertake." sc ripts, cover lettus, reference letters, writGoldberg's enthusiasm and "respect for mg samples, and C \ s. The commtttce is the Court of .\ppcal as an institution and chatred b} Professor :\farrha Shaffer. the1r clerkship program" stem in parr from Besides CJoldberg, Dtrector of Career the fact that she herself clerked at the court, Development Programs Ltanne Krakaucr an expenc.:ncc she docs not hesitate in calland Professor 1\braharn Drassinowcr coming, "one of the greatest years of my life." prise the committee.

De:;pitt· their differences, Goldberg retains Th1s year, there were 28 applicants, "tremendous respect for the clerks and the JUstict·s and for Alison (whom I know from PLEASE SEE •cAP," PAGE 2 m) O\\'n law school years).'' In Goldberg's opinion, rhe court attracts extraordinary canJ1dalcs, and is Jomg itself a dissen ace b} nor lookang at all the contenders. She "would love for rhe court to accept all apph canons from all schools.''

• U OFT ACADEMIC PLAN, P3

:woo

Goldberg emailed students informing them that only fifteen applications were he\ng forwarded.

(I) and Slll'llh Coad (T) pucla:r Upe •• rh~ •trlla: a pot~e.

t>f }ttmu AltCiary.

Daniels and student reps clash on budget cuts

BY BEN PERRIN There was talking, bur was there any communication going on? After an important meeting hdJ last month between sruJenr representatives and Dean Ron Damcls about pending budget cuts totalling Sl mtl lion, neither stdc agrees about what exactly went on.

ro the plan from the student perspective."

"One rhing that I found noteworthy about the meeting \\1th the Jean was that he regards salary increases as parr-and-parcel of 'retaining existing programs' rather than, 'strengthening and expanding the £.1culty,"' said Rix. "This is inrrigu1ng because it means that most of the extra resources acyuircJ by tuition increases will end up going tcmard this item [faculty salary increases) almost exclusi\cly - leaving behind other spcnJmg Items that impact upon student services.''

Ddancy had the same vic\\· of the mt·etlng: "We learned that commitments in ch<.· Five-Year Plan that had resource implications, that none of those \\·ere gomg forward, except for some of the faculty salary incn:ascs."

Robin Rix, a srudcnt representative on !·acuity Council, and ;\aron Delancy, Exrcrnal Chair of the ~tuJent Caucus of l·~cu lry c _ouncil were.: at the Jan. 2.1 meeting Wllh Damcls. ,\s reported by Ultra V1res on Jan. 21, the purpose of the meeting was for students to give input on which programs should rake priority over others.

For their part, Rix and Delancy left the mecring with Daniels deeply concerned that srudent services would be takmg the brunt "If the salary increases go ahead, I think of the cuts, \\ hilc facull) salary increases that student scnice increases have to go would go forward. Damels on the other hand characwrizes tt as "a ve11· strong start PLEASE SEE "STUDENTS, w PAGE 2

UVINDEX

( >thcr schools have been critical of the exception granted to U of T, given the fact that last year, five of the twelve clerks hired were from th1s faculty. Goldberg dtsmissed their objection as unfounded, since two years ago, only one clerk was from U of T.

• IRAQ SHOWDOWN, P6 • FOR AND AGAINST OTTAWA, pg • ROMANTIC LIAISONS, P10-11 • LOVECASTS,P14

www.casselsbrock.com/student.asp

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ULTRA VIRES

NEWS

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Students dispute budget cuts

UV Briefs

"DANIELS " CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1

Financial aid refonns may be coming A report outlining 1112jor changes to the law school's financial aid system is expt.'Cted to be presented to Faculty· Council on Feb. 24.

While the comnuttee's deliberations remJtn confidential until this time, irs report IS C.."qXCted to cover several issues arismg from student Jissatisfacnon ~ith the current system, including the timeline for 6nanci2.1 aid notification, the la\1,· school's rclationshtp with Scotiabank, and the formula used to C'llleularc individual assessments of interest-free loans and bursaries.

The report is the culmination of several months of prepar.uory work

by Faculty Council's Financial Aid commitwc. The committee was helped on a part-nme basis by Stephen Hro~·n, the d1rector of Fordham University's financial aJ.d program, \!.'hom the law school hired in September for this purpose. Brown has prcvtously assisted several other American law schools to reform their ftnancial aid programs.

On the committee is Assistant Dean Lois Chlal\g (Chau), fmancial aid officer .t\\addin Mohaghegh, admiss\ons offtc.cr }udy \<\n\ay, Vro£esson. \\rucc \

ahead as well," said Delaney. "The Dl'an abs~lutcly has to deliver on these student servtce promise~. If he can't deliver the whole faculty has to go back and look a~ this plan again." "\X'e are concerned commitments to students are taking a backseat. To me that is reneging on the bargain made last year," said Delaney.

Delaney credited Daruels with assurances that financial aid comrmtments are unaffected and by promising one additional staff ~ember for the financial aid office as well as 1mplemenong an online registration system.

How~ver, Delaney points out that money for diversity Jruoatives, public mterest law and four additional administrative staff for student servtces are on bold.

Daniels blames the cuts on " unanticipat-

.. We are concerned commitments to students are taking a backseat."

- Aaron Delaney (II) ed shocks" to the budget model due to undcr-fundmg from the provincial government and a loss of revenue from the endowment fund. Daniels disputed the concerns raised by Rix and Delancy. . "I have not privileged the faculty· salary line over other expenditures," said Daruels. '~\11 priorities are being impacted adversely and in equal measure by the cuts."

"Recall that the plan will be implemented over a five year period," said Daruels, "This ye~, we have made sigruficant process against the plan."

For Daniels the soluoon to the budget problem is two-fold. First, Daruels says there is an "urgent need for government to incn:a~c substantially Its support for higher education, and, yes, for removing the unprinoplcd caps on undergraduate tuition levels."

Second, Daniels IS calling for provincial and federal governments to stop obsessing about health care as a pnority spending area at the expense of higher education.

"I worry that the continued fixation of Canadian governments With our health care programs will obscure attention to the fundamental needs of a rap1dly declining university system," said Daniels.

Student representatives do not expect another meeting with Daniels on the issue or an opporturuty to vo1ce their concerns to Governing Council who will now consider the budget m a "behind closed doors process".

Court asks U ofT to vet applications •sTUDENTS • CONTINUED FROM PAGE l

Goldberg was responsible for assessing appl.tcations. including three transfer students. In addition Referring to her capacity as a counsellor to the fifteen successful application pack- she stresses that s he "wouldn't give advic: ages, those of all three transfer students were 10consistent with the (clerkship] guide" the sent to the Court, as the Committee did not Committee prepares for students. "Next bcl!eve it was in a posioon to accurately eval- year, we've asked the Court to clanfy the uate the applicants' qualifications. This was selccoon procedure 10 their publication to d~e to the Committee's lack of acquaintance stu?cn~, a~d they said they're unlikely to, so W\th the profe!I!IOr'S who had written refer- we \1 bu1ld It inw our guide." ence \etten;, anu the d1££erent gradinp; <~olc.l\)("tg has alv.·ays lx-cn very clear 10 en~ • .\.bnham Dfta,mO'OICT, and t.<;..l'\l:n'\C."' \.1'>4;.'-\ t\.\ n\hCI' ~\..\\u.c>\ \.;t>tnmuw''l.:.•tsn.v.. ••• '"'-Mkn•• t\'\at t\u ftr• caa Collem Hood, and :;tudent repn:senta- } Goldberg asserts that, had she felt any tin:s Dawm.• Kront•dy (Ill), Sll;~un con£11ct m her mind ccgarding an apphcanL, I.aubnun (II), Nathanici.Lipkus (I). she would have recused herself. She has - Robi11 Rix served o n the Clerkship Committee for stx year s, and while a clerk at the Court,

of obtaining a clerkship at the Court of Appcal1s "almost JUSt as competitive as [for] the Supreme Court of Canada." She worries that the already "self-selecting group" will contract as a result of the development, and considers tt "unfortunate" that fewer students arc likely to apply in corrung years.

No limit is placed on the applications for clerkships at any of the other courts. This year, twenty r.tuJcnt~ applied for the Supn·mc Court.

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NEWS

11 FEBRUARY 2003

U ofT "Green Paper" proposes deregulated undergrad tuition Student leaders react positively to most proposals

BY SIMREN DESAI The university's Green Paper for Pubhc Discussion, a "descriptive rather than pre scriptive" statement that is meant to elicit feedback and discussion on institutional policy for the next five years, contains some contentious proposals.•\mong them is the suggcsoon that the university lobby the fed eral government for tuition deregulation in order to meet its "clearly articulated goal of becorrung one of the world's best public research universities."

Citing the fact that real per student funding in Ontario has been frozen at 1992 levels "and is the lowest of any [pubhcly-fundedl North \mcrican junsdlction," the paper argues that new sources of funding must be aggressively pursued. These include request ing more funding from the provinctal government, or lobbying It to deregulate tuition.

Student leaders seem strongly opposed to the latter. " I think its important that tuition remain at an acccss1ble level. University education is a public good. The government ought to step up to the plate and t:tke responsibility for the funding shortfall," said Josh Paten-on (ll) who represents undergraduate profes~ional faculties on the university's Governing Counetl, which will vote on the final polic) paper in May. \\on~ l)imilar lines, the paper advocates a

dccentralv.arion of policy decision making to the individual colleges and faculocs. By forcing individual academic deans to "match income With expenditures," the university hopes to meet strict budgetary restrictions in a manner similar to leading private institutions. Another rationale for decentralization is the professed ineffectiveness of topdown decis1on-making with respect to program funding in individual departments at large 10stiturions.

"In a university as big as this one, I think It 1s perfectly normal for responsibility to be pushed out to the divisions. \1orc power is also being spun out to UTM and UTS, which no longer fall under the Faculty of \rts and Sciences," said Paterson. "The unfortunate trade-off in a collegiate system is less of a sense of commuruty on campus."

The green paper also addresses the diversity of both the student and faculty popula tions at length. It takes the posmon that diversity in the student body enriches the student experience in and of itself, and pomts to the high relative di\'Crsity· of tl1e student body at U of T "-with nearly 50% of our student body corning from such groups." It commits the university· in principle, with a listing of several potential iniriaovcs including community· outreach programs, to the continued proactive recruitment of underrepresented groups.

The paper suggests that, "recognizing

diversity in our faculty as itself part of the to, among other things, "examine and dcfirution of the 'best' in the faculty taken as improve accessibility to student housing for a whole, run some carefully calculated risks professional faculty students" and ameliorate family housing facilities. in appointments that would bong such fac· Rlx emphas1scs that the green papt;rs arc ulty in earlier." Such "risk"' might include establishing "a program of postdoctoral fel- the initial documents in U of T's planning lowships for future faculty from under-rep- process. "They arc intended to elicit discusresented groups with these fellowships lead- sion rather than stake out firm policies. As mg at the end to consideration for an a result, they are gomg to be bold and perappointment as assistant professor." haps even radical in parts- like the suggesAnother proposal would "make success ar tion that U of T should lobby the provincial hiring such faculty a specific clement of per- government to deregulate undergraduate formance evaluation for merit for chairs and tuition."

There arc four green papers in all: one on deans [of mdividual colleges]." ,\nother major thrust of the paper is the "The Characteristics of the Best (Public) need to address housing defic1enc1es on Research Lnivcrsities," another discussing campus. The paper puts forward many pos- "The Student Experience," one on sibilities, including purchasing old hotels " \ cadem1c Leadership m Research and and buildings off-campus, and setong· up Teaching: bculty and Staff 10 Relation ro residential communioes after the model of university Prioriocs," and a fmal paper on similar projects at the Umvers1ty of "Resources for the Acadermc Plan." These available on the web ar Ch1cago. While a shortage of undergraduate arc htrp:/ /\vW\\:utoronto.ca/plan2003.

Anyone housing is emphasised, no specific mention of projects aimed at professional students wi5hing w take part in the consultation mar also find out how to do so at that address. . or families IS made.

A draft "white paper" (i.e. a policy ver''The condition of family housing is, quite frankly, abysmal at this university," says ston) of an academic plan will be developed Rob1n Rix (II), a member of Faculty and circulated to the university in l\farch for Council. He points out however thar "an further comment and discu%ion. FoiiO\\<ing offshoot from the green papers is the new that period of discus~ion, a final version of Provostial Task Force on Student Housing," the academic plan will be prepared for suba committee on which he has been a~kcd ro mission to the Gm crning Council in late sit. I te says that the task force is mandated spring.

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4

NEWS

ULTRA VIRES

Misery loves company on Valentine's Day Dear IIEJ ....\IUT. \ l11g Bay Street firm has inYited me to Jin ncr and I'm mcrcJ1bl) anxious :tbout 11. \\'ill! survi\e? Can you !,'1\·e me an) poinrers? \'ot IIJmgry

DEAR HELMUT Feeling down? Health Enables legal Minds at the University of Toronto (HELMUT) offers advice

food. Swallow first. 'Jry not to rcll wgetarDear ~or llungry, lan jokes, especiall) if your inren·iewer Oh yummy yum )'tun. Bay Street fm>d is good ... bUI t.hr thought of a lunch or dm - orders the tofu and bean salad.

The most important thing w remember ncr intcr\"iew can be a httle bit scary. So 1-JFLMLrr has come up \\1th ~orne sun'l\'al IS that if )OU don't gl't the JOb, Jt m~ght not hl' lx•causc you spilled your hot soup on the tips. hrst of aU. don't tuck your napkin into pan ncr's lap. •\s wnh all firm-related mat ) our shirt. It's not cute. Napkms belong on tt•rs, these things arc completely subjective, your lap. If food is splancring on )OUr shin, arc decided using infimtd) variable and chances arl' you :tre eaung roo f.1st. ~low it op<HjUe criteria, and should never be rakcn personally. do\\ n. u~e the cutler· ~ometunes there can be roo much of ir. ~elect your caring tools Dear fl El ...\Il.J'I~ from the outside m, or watch what other l'm single, I'm lonely and no body's gotng to people do. You don't need to usc cudery 1f send me a Candygmm on Valentine's Day. you order something for which cudery is All I do is read law books and I'm not meetnor required, but whatever you do, avoid ing anybodr How am I going to get through another February 14th? chicken wmgs. They just aren't pretty. .

Limit alcohol consumption. Tlus is nei- • Hallmark-hal~r ther rhe rime nor the place to show off rour great tolerance (or lack thereof). A~·oid Dear Hallmark-hater, drinking stories no matter how comfortable \'\'ell, HEL.\fUT loves you, if nobody else you feel; tcU them the one about the four- docs. Bur that's probably not much consostorey beer funnel after you get the job. lation. Misery loves company. So why not Your interview may be in a relaxed setting, get yourself together "'ith all the other misbut it is still an interview. erable single people tlus Valentine's Day Make polite conversation. ,\ conversa- and fight back? Send out an e-mail to folks non is not polite when your mouth is fu\l of at the school tnvtting all singles to join you

Jewish law students Imeet in Ottawa on the dreaded da), turn your place into a

party palaCl', and mila! You haw a Valentine's Sucks bash. (.\11 couples banned.)

If you can't bring youm:lf w party, then II EI.Mll'J' suggests listening to Tina Turner belt out "\\hat's I .ovc Got ro Do \\'ith Ir?" on perpetual replay. If you don't lose your f.'l.ith m lo\e, thl·n maybe you'll remember that Valcntml"s D.ty :ttn't nothin' but an oldfashioned notion. \nd remember, thl'fe arc upsides to being single on this holiday. You don't haw to comprum1se with anyone, Juggle mutual schedules, or li\c up to an) high-pressure Valennnc's Day t•xpect:uions. ~o one will complain that you took them to .\IcDonald's for dinner, and no one will bu\ vou horrible hngtn~; and expect you to we~ .lt.

So It's not all bad. You can still cat cinna· mon hearts no matter what your daring sta tus happens to be. \nd February 15th always rolls around.

Got a q11eJiion for HEL\!UT? P111 il in the 'Vtar I lEL\1UT" box I!) lht mailjoldm.

And ifJOII rr firling down or lookingfor itifo on how to gtt advict of the mort profmional kind, t-mail afpia.daties{@llloronto.ca, catl!).dark@lltoronto.ca, or tatnaraknnox@hotmail.com. I IEL\1UT (I lealth EnableJ Ltgal Minds at U of T) iJ hm to protid~you u.ith resources about health and wellbeing if yo11 11nd them. Your prit•acy will bt respected.

DAVIES WARD PHILLIPS

BY LISA MIN UK Benjamin ~. Cardozo was Jewish. \\'ho knew? Mr. Justice hank Iacobucci comicallr n•rounted thl· Martling discoverr that Cardozo was not a fellow Italian. "The dagger through my heart," Iacobucci dead panned, "canw when I realized the ~- \\'liS for Nathan."

So began the sixteenth annual confer encl' of the Canadian Je\\ish Law Student's \s$ociauon. One hundred and forty-one law studl'll!S and mtcrns from across Cnnada convergl·d in ( )ttawa recently to network, cat, and listen as rhc fourteen dtstinguished speakers discuss~;d "La\\~ Security and Human Rights: Jewish Pcrspecuws," the thcme of the conference.

The speeches ranged from the personal to the polincal. Haim Divon, the Israeli \mbassador to Israel, defended Israel's conduct w1th respect to the Palestinians.

Divon argued that Israel ought to be judged by me standards of "a beleaguered democracy ar war rather than a secure democracy at peace." He urged parttc1pants to VISit Israel and judge me situarion for themselves.

In contrast, Justice Rosalie Silberman \bella gave an intensely personal speech.

Choking back tears, she told of the way in which the Holocaust had damaged, shaped PLEASE SEE "CONFERENCE" ON PAGE 5

NEWS

11 FEBRUARY 2003

5

Students launch refugee working group under auspices of IHRP Group to focus on resettlement and interdiction

BY JOANNA ANE The number of worldwide refugees has mcreased to nearly twenty million. At the same time, Canadian policies affecting the ability of refugees to make claims in Canada are becoming more restrictive.

Within this context a Refugee Protection Working Group has formed at the Jaw schooL Paulina Wyrzykowski and Andrew Brouwer started the group with the goal of creating a Canadian support system for refugees and NGOs working on issues related tO refugees.

Working groups arc an important part of the law school's International Human Rights Program (IHRP). "They arc the pnmary vehicle for students to share thetr mtcrests wtth other students," says Noah Novogrodsky, IHRP Director. His hope is that worktng groups will enable "law stu dents to do what they can legally in support of soc1al justice and human righrs issues."

Wyrzykowski and Brouwer's unique experiences have resulted in the formation of t\VO sub-committees within the working group focused on interdiction and resettlement. "The groups are complementary," explains Brouwer, and combine the two main areas of refugee law: policy and out· reach. They hope that other students will bring their own interests to the group.

Brouwer developed a parncular intere!\t m lntcrthcuon through his work as a mem-

ber of the Canadian Council for Refugees (CCR) and at the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees (UNHCR) rn Geneva. Interdiction is used increasingly by Canada and other countries to prevent asylum-seekers from making their way to Canada through interference at rurports or high seas. The result is that refugees arc denied the right to make a refugee claun and the possibility of obtaining protccoon from pcrsecuoon.

"The main work on interdiction IS legal analysis," explains Brouwer. ''\'Qhilc NGOs are doing good work, they don't have orne to go through legal writing." His hope is to get students rnvolved in "alternative legal analysts on rntcrdiction." A legal cducaoon means that "law students arc well-cgutppcd to handle policy issues.'' In addioon to research and writing, members of the group will help to organize and participate in the CCR conference held in May tn Ottawa.

The goal of the Resettlement Comrruttce is to help individuals who have a legally valid claim, but who have fallen through the cracks of the United '-Jaoons refugee system. \fter spending a few summers working with refugees in Cairo, Egypt, through the IHRP summer internship program, Wyrzykowski feels strongly that "legally trained Canadian students can be helpful." Tlu:ough her personal contacts, the group is currently considering a

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case of a Sudanese refugee living illegally in Cairo. The aim, however, is to expand this focus and make contacts with NGOs working with refugees in vanous countries.

The resettlement group will work with organbaoons that already have an arrange· mcnt with Imrrugration Canada to sponsor refugees. By approaching ftrms and other

Conference features Iacobucci, Abella, Grey "JEWISH LAW" CONTINUED FROM PAGE 4

and channeled her farruly's values and atrimdes towards the Ia\\>: The conference speeches were around topics that easily spark discussion. The packed itinerary, however, precluded lcn!:,>thy yucstion periods. :'.lany of the more controversial dcbatcs, particularly concerning the situation in the MidJk Ea~t, occurred in small groups after the speeches had ended.

OsgooJe Hall students clear\} dominated the conference, both in terms of numbers and diversity. E\·cn some nonjewlsh Osgoodcrs attended, possibly indicating a broader publicity campa1gn than at L! ofT. Others who addressed the attendees

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organizations, the group plans to fundraise the $9,500 necessary to support the reset· tied refugee for one year after arrivaL Novogrodsky says that the refugee sponsorship program may become a proJeCt of the proposed Human Righrs Cliruc, once approved. The clinic is scheduled to be discussed at the next Faculty Council meeting.

Borden Ladner Gervais LLP Lawyen o 'atent • Tl'ad1Hnar1c Agents Avocats o Agents de brevets ft de rnarquet de <ommerc:e

included tl1c Right Honourable Mr. Herb Gray, former Deputy P~l and Chair of the Canadian Section of the International Joint Commission; Dr. ln;ng Abella, Canadian and Je"'ish I listory Profc~sor at York University; Martin Rudner, Director of Canadian Centre of lnteUigcncc and Security Studies; Prof. lrwi.n Cotler, i\tount Royal .M P; M.ark Berlin, ~ational Executive Director of Canada's Department of Justice; ~\orris Rosenberg, Deputy r-..\mister of Jusocc and Deputy Attomev General of Canada~ Anch Roscnbl~m. Onuno1 Regional Dtrcctor of B'nai Brith; Jack Sth.crstone, Executive Vice-President and General Counsel of the Canadian je\\.ish Conference; nnd Prof. Joseph Eliot Magn..:t, a common law professor at the University of Otmwa.

ULTRA VIRES

LEGAL ISSUES

6

LEGAL ISSUES

11 FEBRUARY 2003

High noon: Iraq, the Security Council and international law

Child porn sting raises awkward free speech questions

BY JUTTA BRUNNEE

Legendary rocker Pete Townshend among those implicated

he plot is thickening. Following Colin Powdl\ presentation ro the United '\lauons Security Council, Prc~idcnr Bush declared that "the game is over" for the "tltctator of Iraq.'' For all its bluster, the United "imtes remains engaged in Sccurity Counc.il deliberations and expressed readmL'SS to work to\1.-a.rds a sec· ond rc olution ro support military action in !ray. ''\X'indow-dressing." "Damned if you do (authori7c fi>rcc), damned tf you don't," "Political posturing and horse-trading."

Many a snappy dtsmissal of the L. process has cuculatcd in recent months. "\\'hat's la\1.'

U.S. Secretary of State Colin Powell presents his case got to do \l.ith it?" might be another hit at the top of the cyrucs' charts. because we may be Witnessing a potentially states ( \rticle 2(4)). Short of an authoriza.o\nd yet, the Sccurir; Council is the arena dangerous loosemng of legal constraints on tion by the Security Council, an exception to for world debate on the use of force in Iraq. the mternaoonal use of force. thts prohibition is provided only m Article Governments, pariJamcntarians, pundits and The edttors asked me to review the "the 51: pursuant to their "inherent right of indithe proverbial people on the street discuss legality of the use of force at international vidual or collective self-defense," states may the pros and cons of a doctrine of "prelaw if the US attacks Iraq." So, let me try to usc force to respond to an "armed attack." emptive strike," debate the "material shed light on the legal goalposts, and illus- Alongside the Charter, customary law breach" of Secunty Council Resolution trate why I say that international law and the arguably allows for anticipatory self-defence 1441(2002), or opine on the need for a secrole of the UN may be changing as we in limited circumstances involving imminent ond resolution. Consciously or unconspeak. And, at the risk of straying Ultra threats. Customary law is shaped and rescious!}; rarely do more people use the lan\'ues, I will venture some thoughts on why shaped through processes of claim and guage of imernacional la\1.' For better or for we should care not just about whether or counter-clatm, in word or action. The worse, then, international law's got a lot to not there is a \1.-aT in Iraq, but also about its Urutcd States, in its 2002 "lational Security do with it. For better, because it sets the implicanons for international Jaw. Strategy, argues for the adaptation of the parameters for our debates and demands The L'N Charter provides a general pro- rules on the use of force to allow for "prejustifications. Quite possibly for worse, hibition of the use of force against other emptive strikes" against "emerging threats."

T

See\n~ ted

We should care not just about whether or not there is a war in Iraq, but also about its implications for international law.

BY ADAM ROCK

T

The current case for war agamst Iraq builds on the threats posed by hnks between ter· rorists and "rogue states" with weapons of mass destruction. ~o argument is m.1de (or could be made ...) that lraq poses an imminent threat to the United StatLs or any other country. Thus, if the Lmtcd States and Britain (and other states "willing') were to proceed with mihtary action against Iraq without claiming l., N authonzanon (sec below), they would cffcctivcl} act upon the claim of a right to pre· emptive strikes. From the standpoint of international law, it would then be important how the majority of other states respond. If the existing legal framework ts not re ..asserted or the new doctrine is endorsed, expressly or tacitly, a rapid change of mternational Ia\\· may well occur. Whether we would be left \l.ith anything capable of providing normative guidance or constraining unilateral asscs$ments is doubtful. The assurance of the American security strategy document that "lt]he United States will not use force in all cases

PLEASE SEE MIRAQ," PAGE 16

sa~el rh.11

about Gosse\\n '1. Quebec

/ega/ uunauves, such as the Poverty and Human Rights project, a three-year effort to Later, we won't be able to talk about being increase understanding of social and ecoin law school \l.ithout telling what it was like nomic nghts at several levels of jurisdiction, when the Gomlin ~ Quibtr (A.G.), [2002] and Pivot Legal Society, a strategic litigation S.C.C. 84 decision came down from the organization workmg to advance the rights Supn:mc Court of Canada. \\'e heard whis- of the marginalized people m \'ancouver's pers of it from our profL'Ssors as their col- downtown east side. \X'e were surrounded leagues argued the case for intervenors such by the legal issues around poverty, and it as the ::\ational Association of \'\'omen and ftrcd us up. You take affidavits about life at the Law, and the Charter Committee on the \\'ootl\1.-a.rd's squat or destitute drug Poverty Issues. Then there was a long users describing being police brutality, and silence while the decision was pending. The you start to sec red about the many ow'ays year ended, summer came and went, and human rights can be violated. You start to soon we were back at school, and both of us care about the potential in the Canadian were immersed in our own constitutional Constitution to prevent such violations, scholarship through courses in Federalism, ctthcr under s.7 of the Charter (life, liberty Charter, and Human Rights Law. and security of person), or s.lS (equality). \X'c were also involved in some exciting And as these small fires started to blaze in

BY KAT KINCH AND EFRAT ARBEI.

us, our professors' wh1spers changed: they told us to sit up, to pay attention, because the decision 1n Gosstlin \\'as about to be released. It came out on December 19, 2002, the da) that marked the halfway point in our legal education. \'\'e'U always remember Gomlin, because a majority of five justices of the Supreme Court of Canada didn't sec the case as one in which the Chancr's potential could be realized. It is the first ruling to address a right to an adequate level of social assistance under provincial human rights legislation and the Canadian Charter of R.tghts and Freedoms.

In Gosselin, the court constdcred whether leg islaoon that denied members of a disadvantaged group adequate financial assistance was constitutionally valid.

The regulation in question, introduced in

he recent arrest of The Who's Pete Townshend on suspicion of possess ing child pornography hasn't quite had the same impact here as it has in England. There could be several reasons for this. Townshend doesn't possess the same kind of status here as he docs in England, where rock stardom, not cleanliness, is next to godliness. \nd Canadians don't quite derive the same kind of J'rhuduifrmdt the English do from \\-atching their gods fall from grace. But the lack of interest in 1cJwnshend\ fate may be because Canadians arc barely recovenng from a messy child pornography scandal of chctr own. Jn its recent dccts1on R v. .Sharpt, the Supreme Court of Canada angered many Canadtans by rultng that the offense of possession of chtld pornography constitutes a v1olaoon of the tight to frccdom of expression. Whether the Court \l.'llS right or not is a complex and difficult question.

Pete 'li>wnshcnd's problems began in <.:arly January of this year when a British newspaper reported that a well-known musician w-as among thousands Identified by the U$. Department of Justice for down loading chtld pornography from the Internet. Townshend admitted that he had paid to 'iew a child pornography site, hut

J 984, cstabhsh c<.l a rcc.Jucec.J rate of assis ranee for mdtviduals under 30 who were "employable" and not engaged in the workforce. The rate was reduced from $434 to S 173 per month - constituting less than 20% of Statistics Canada's Lo\\' Income Cut-Off - as an "incentive" to force young people into job trainmg.

Once in a program, a young person's hendib ·were topped up.

But there were more people than spaces, and there were time gaps between programs, so that people such as the claimant, Louise Gosselin, attempted to live off $170 a month for substantial periods of time. That meant homdcssness. That meant hunger and malnutnnon. For women, that meant a likelihood of sexual commodification and

PLEASE SEE MFIGHTlNG,. PAGE 8

he <hd so "just to ~cc what

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there." He also said that he was conducting "research" because he thinks he may have been the victim of abuse as a child. "I've been writing my life story," he said, "and the research is for a book."

Townshend was arrested a few days later on three separate counts: suspicton of pos scssing indecent images of children, making indecent images, and incitement to distrib ute them. The arrest was part of Operation ,\\'alanche, a L.S. Dcpartment of Justice initiative aimed at apprehending individuab It suspects of possessing or distributing child pornography on the internet. The focus of Operation Avalanche has been a child pornography network known as L1ndslide,

Townshend admitted that he had paid to view a child pornography site, but said that he did so "just to see what was there." which provided subscribers \\;th a "gate· way" to thousands of pornographic sttes based mainly in Indonesia and Eastern Europe.

Th~ Department of Justice iJenrifieJ subscnbc.;rs to the network through their credit card information. Subscribers haJ to provide credit card numbers so that the L:.mu5\iue gateway cou\u venf) who they

were before charb'1flg them for access to the and I think this could be the most damaging sites. Over 250,000 indtv;duals were eventu· thing to my career." Indeed, tt's difficult to imagine \vhat could possibl) be worse for ally unplicated, mcluding Townshend.

Townshend was released shortly after his his career, or his reputation in general. \s arrest in January, but has to return for fur- one Canadian legal scholar recently wrote, ther qucsnoning at the end of February. lf child pornography "tends to produce an he IS convicted of possessing child pornog- unusual degree of unanimity in the reacraphy, he will face up to five years in prison. tions of the legislarure, [and] the public."

Dtstnbution of child pornography carries a These reactions, understandably, tend to be highly ncgative..That \\'aS certainly th~ case harsher ten-year sentence.

Townshend maintains that his subscrip· last vear 'With the conclusion of R t: Jharpt, a ca~c which dtd ltttlc to dispel the public's cion to the chtld pornography site was part of his research for a book he 1s writing. "I notion that the Supreme Court is out of am not a paedophile. J think paedophilia is rouch with the concerns of common appalling," he told reporters recently. "Hut Canadian cinzens.

John Robm Sharpe \\1\S arrested in B~ti~h to fight against paedophilia, you have to Columbia in 1995 after police founJ him m know what's out there," he srud. possession of computer disks that co~­ In I ~ngland, It 1s an offence for a person tained sexually cxplictt photographs of c~t\· to possess child pornography unless that dren. They also found a collcccic~n of sto~es person has "a legitimate reason" for domg he had written that involved chtldren hem~ so. The "legitimate reasons" for possessmg sexuallv abused and tortured . llc was child pornography arc fe\V and far between. chargej under s. 163.1 of the .Criminal C~de ~\cademic research 1s one, but the person \\;th two counts of possession of chtld conducting the research must dc.:mons~te pornography and two counts of posses ion that he or she \l.'aS left '\.vith no alternanve for thL purpose of distribution or sale. but to have the unpleasant material in his or ~h~rpe's legal response wa.; that the her possession." Thts puts Townshend in a otflncc of mere possession in s. 163.1 of difficult legal position. the Crimi11al Cndt \'iolated hi~ right to free· Of cour~c. Townshend is in all kinds of dom of cxpresston under s. ~(b) of the difftcult positions at the moment, not just Cbarltr of Rights t1nd Fmdoms. "I'hc .Supreme: legal. Short\) after he \\'aS identified as the mu:-tcian on the Deparnncnt of Ju:;tice list, he s>\IU, "l was worried thts tmght happen PLEASE SEE MCHILD PORN," PAGE 16

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OPINION

ULTRA VIRES

OPINION

11 FEBRUARY2003

9

Was that my inner monologue?

Bytown versus Hogtown: four vignettes

BY PAUL GALBRAITH

Toronto really is a world class city - at least when it comes to tooting its own horn

with funher conversation. Time to move wycJ a sense of t:asy camaradenc anJ "So what area do you specialize in, 1f I inw egress phase. IM1unch quick-exit banal confidcnCl'. Ye:., I kno\\' you are shaken. might ask?"

Do not stan wn:ping. \\c'll talk about it roptc discussion. \\"ell uonc. Curses. A tax lawyer. 'That when we ger home. I saiJ when we get So how about that local sports team explains the handshake. This shoulJ be a home! You ~ill look Jirecdy into his qcs, and/ or the weather? barrel of laughs. My calculations indicate smile, nml, and launch into rour opening.

Perft·ct. Now you have d.Jscusscd two you arc only capabk· of feigning interest "Fine, thank you. Yes, 1 am in first year.

111 tax law for 2 minutes, thircy-six sectopics, asked about the recruiter's job I do enjoy law ~chool so far. It's going onds. (shudJer), and provided a polite exit route. very well so far."

Warning) Another student has JOmcd 111 Exit now: Obviously, do not risk a closing Two "so fars" in that exchange, which and is asking more qucsuons about tax handshake. is one too many. Remember what we )a,,J J\nd she is better looking than you!

Yes, it sure has been. \Xcll, it's been pmcnccd. ~o more mistakes.

T1mc to shift gears into non-legal topics such a pleasure talking to you, but I sup"Oh yes, I find it very interesting sobefore you glaze over and pass out or pose I ought to let rou meet everyone. ehm. Yes, highly challenging and cngagcommit sycophanticide.

I'd love to chat later though. Thanks • ing."

"Yes ... umm hmm, your dog you sar?" very much. Yes. Indeed, haha, I will Sigh. What docs he think you arc going Oh my, that was smooth, my young remember that! Great, you too. See you to say? ·~\ctually Mr. Recruiter, the law pada\\-an. 1-<..":lrning well you arc. Hoocyin a bit, I'll remember to try the cggrolls. bores and angers me, and I think I'd like hoo, JUSt look at that ass-kisser who tried Take care. to skip all m} classes and surf the I ntcrnet to horn m on your ass! Ms. "Golly-gee, I victory ts our!\! D1d you see that light 1 all day?" B) the wa)·, that was a decent never realized tax law could be so fascim rus eyes! You were all you could be! recovery, bur get your mind back on the oaring before!" isn't so rough now. Hal Bland, polite, uninterested yet-appearing job and away from the shrimp cocktail.

There may be two checks to kiss, but we tntcrcsred, humble· yet-confident, non-psyYes T know, I'm hungry too, but we can have b1g lips, my dear.

• chooc, mtclligcnt (enough), and receptive put half a Jozen 10 a napkin before we Oh hahaha, hilarious! You must've have to mcamngless anecdotcry. You arc exactleave. \lso, lay off the "-ing" words been so shocked. Oh well, of course! I ly the kind of person he is gomg to want before you hurt yourself. can sec that. I couldn't agree more. to interact with when it comes time for "Well, probably property and torrs, but Indeed. You don't say? How about that, someone m the office to read 2,800 pages I also really enjoy contracts. They're all huh? of tax law. \\ hrch, when rou consider our really great."

Oh yes, yes, res and yes again! You've overall objccuve, is good ... I guess. Yes, Good, good. Keep the fa~dc up. got a tax lawyer telling anecdotes about I'm scared, too.

Don't let them know that rou arc secredy ' his cat or dog or fish or something and Moving on, let's go investigate the thrilled by the Oakes test! .Now that he rou have maintained Poltte Social shrimp cocktail for a minute before we has asked three questions, It is }'Our turn.

Conversation for 9 rrunutes, forcy-nine tackle !\1s. Spunky llapprfacc Namctag You can scratch later! Remember what we seconds. If only the COO could see you Recruiter standing alone by the coat rack. went over. Okay, ask now. now! Do not risk this posmve encounter 1 wonder if she has a dog ...

I

i\'amtlm Rrmtilin,g Fumtrofl #3- l:JO p.m. kar Paul, you know what you have to tlo. Most law firms arc easy to please. They simply want ~omeont· who is outgoing, super intelligl'nt, inn:rcsting, funn); personable, tidy, confident, charismatic, empathetic ()·et not too empathetic), fun, happy, ultra hard~orking, loyal, ant.! di~crcet. Give them that person tonight. Make them low you. lien: come~ your Mt new best friend. ,\!right, confident stride and a healthy smile, arm e..xtendcd, fingers probing, muscles rcnsctl. There we go. He starts to shake ant.! ... ack! 'The dead fish! The "isthis-a-secrct-hant.lshakc-1-am-unawarc-of" handshake! Now he tries to rcco,·cr. Oh goJs, his hand is only half in yours, grab bing fingers, no thumb action anywhere in sight! He's S<JUirming, wnggling in your grasp during the single up-and-down.

Disengage, Jamn roul Sigh.

Disengagement results 10 a last feeble attempt at a rcclasp on his part, leading to / more awkward hand-hockc} and a bnef three-finger interlocking. Dtsasrrous.

Focus, Paul, you can overcome this!

You arc a better law student than this handshake! It never happened. \nd if it did, it w-as the recruiter's fault, wluch is to say that it never happened. That hand~hake 'W'U perfect. 1t was !\trong and con\

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assault It m<.:ant deep poverty, dcspatr, and loss of ilignity.

The majority of the court did not sec it this way, finding that a reasonable person in the circumstances of the claimant would not have perceived a violation of human digmry because the gO\~ernmcnr w-as acting for her long·tcrm good. Homelessness, hunger, prostitution- these immediate consequences of the regulation did not convince the court that the claimant suffered "actual hardship," nor that her human rights had been violated or her security of the person compromised.

The maJority's ruling is problcmauc on many points, but two of these demand particular rccogmuon. First is the majority's applicauon of the purposive stage of the s.lS test articulated in Law t\ Ca11ada (.\fit~ister of EmplfJ.Ymtllt a11d lmmrgratum) 11999] S.C.R. 497. Tht Com/in jpdgmcnt employs a iliffercnt analrucal structure than that traditionally adopted by the court, and seems to overemphasize the significance of the governmental purpose while giving inadequate weight to the claimant's subjective experiences of a human dtgnity infringement and of the harmful effects of the rc~:,rulation. The repeated references to f.1ct·spccific evidentiary deficicnces arc not reassuring, in light of the second cause for concern.

The majomy f:uls to recognize that a reasonable person would in fact have asserted I,mrisc Gos~clin's claim. 1be judgment, con· tear) to the spectfic cauoon on thts point in l.JIU', invokes the very poverty-related

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Fighting for the human rights of the poor "SEEING RED" CONTINUED FROM PAGE 6

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stereotypes the claim sought to d1spel.

These arc stereotypes dut view the poor as weak, lazy individuals whose unfortunate economic circumstanct:s result from individual failin~. These arc stereotypes that v;cw poor women as mentally fragile individuals who are prone to prostitution or sexual promiscuity, and have somehow failed to avail thcmscl\·c~ of care from those who traditionall} look after them (such as their husbands, partners, or parents). These stereotypes stand 10 the way of recognizing poverry and economic inequality as human rights vtolauons prohibited by the Canadian constituuon. ln the aftermath of Gosstli11, how do we substantiate the cl11m that povercy is a human rights violation? How dire must one's situation be, how extreme the povercy, before a court is willing to abandon stereotypes, is willing to be convinced? Is the evidentiary burden now set so high that future poverty nghts claims are simply impossible to win':> \'\'hat sort of case IS required to dccon~rruct a government asseroon that they were trying to help poor people through these drastic welfare cuts?

These arc the questions that are part of our education now, that will follo\,\; us into practice after we leave law school. We'll still be fired up, because one day soon we'll want to persuade the court that it is time to rccognv.c the law's potential to protect the human rights of the poor people. We'll remember Gossrlifl then, because it is the case that lost, and the case that set the terms of what we'll have to do to win.

Kat at1d /~frat are both strondyear l1w studmts at tiJl Ullit'trsitJ of Brilisb Columbia.

Ottawa may be civilised, but civilised people should not live here

BY SALMAN HAQ I went to the opening ccrcmomcs of Wintcrfcst, Toronto's celebration of Winter, last weekend. According to the organvers, Wintcrfcst is an "mcredible indoor-outdoor free festival with non-stop concerts from top musical talent, '1.\.'0rld·class skating shows, cool cultnary creations, outlanclish street theatre, thrilling acrobaocs, daring dance, comedy and much more!" 1 saw a ren-rrunutc skating debacle, a band called "The Draw" and an icc sculpture of a toilet.

But then, should 1 really be surprised?

Toronto really is a world-class cicy - at least when it comes to tooting its own horn. It aspires to be something special, something grand. But in rcalicy, Toronto doesn't live up to the hype. Don't get me wrong- Toronto is generally a nice place to live - but you front. Ottawa has miles of scenic parkway can't convince me it's even in the same lining the unspoiled shorelines of its rivers league as New York, London, Paris, or and canals. Toronto's ''Parkway" is a six-lane Hong Kong. parking lot, er, lughway paved over a pollutOur nation's capital, on the other hand, is ed creek.

Toronto foolishly built an extension of blissfully understated. Ottawans know we have it good, and while we generally don't their subway to nowhere. Ottawa has an like to boast about it, it's time my hometown efficient, fast, and cheap public transit sysgot its due. For example, Ottawa's winter tem that has been emulated from Australia festival, Winterlude, ts one of the largest to Trinidad. celebration s of win£er in the world and ln the summertime, Torontoruans sit for the oty itself ranks amonp; the t<>p ten w\n hour.; in traffic t() esCaf>C the C\\y an<.\ ")r,Ct lcr dcstinauon5 in the workl. <...>u.aw-... h<l$ the ba<:.k to nature." tta"''llll!l ba!lk m \he """'•rJd:..

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city hall.

The Toronto Maple Leaf.~ ace the epitome of their hometown: b1g, brash, and whiny. Leafs lose a game? Blame the refs.

Players hurt? Other teams are dirty. Didn't have enough energy? The schedule sucks.

The Leafs talk big, but deliver small - much like the city itsel£ Toronto has an eyesore called the Gardiner Expressway littenng its water-

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BY NOAH GmERMAN Ottawa may be a civilised urban area, but civilised people should not live here. l-or one thing, it is too goddamn cold. It seems to me that one mark of civilisation's progress is that, for more and more people, surviving the elements becomes less and less of an issue. Ottawa, however, puts survival front and centre. When lt IS -35, and there are arctic w\nds screaming o££ the Ottawa river, an<.\

And finally, even if you're still not a fan of Ottawa, remember that it's got something that Toronto will never have: the fact that Montreal is only two hours away.

\s

attem~nnp,

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BY BRENDA DIDYK

BY ROBIN RIX

PLEASE SEE MROCKS,. PAGE 16

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ncce-:ur.an'!J / ..l'r'tH.--...

I hope I make it co the restaurant/ movie theatre/office without freezing co death."

Ottawa has a nightlife, but t1us nrghtlife occurs io only rwo places: on Elgin Sr., or in the Market. And on Elgin, you nsk accidentally finding yourself in the middle of a Young Liberals fundraiser, and thus further risk being hec.kled by those around you when you quiedy mention that perhaps Paul M'artin is overrated. While m the Market,

Tronna and me

Torontonians pride themselves on their gritty, big city attitude. Somehow they feel this makes them more sophisticated . And somehow they feel this gives them a carte blanche to srucker and sneer at our lovely and wellgroomed Nation's capital: Ottawa. Well, I'm not gonna take it anymore. Ottawa 1s tuce and what's wrong with that?

What's wrong with clean streets, wellorganized city space, museums, galleries, and monwncnts? What's wrong with decent skiing, bike paths all over the cicy, the world's longest skating rink, and the gorgeous Gatineau hills?

What's that, Toronto? You answer with Nathan Phillips Square and High Park? You argue that one giant phallus, a provincial assembly made of gingerbread, and Honest Ed's are landmarks and architecture enough? "Ha," I say. "Ha!" Your city is a mess. And your new subway line is a road to nowhere..

My parents moved to Ottawa m the early 1970s, arriving on the tail of Canada's centennial celebrations. Things were groovin'

to

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cup1cd WJrh a smgular rhouglu: ..Dc-.u- God,

The only thing Ottawa lacks is obnoxious lineups and Ottawa was coming into its own.

Nowhere more than in the capital were people more excited to be Canadian. Other people watched Trudeau on TV; we lived and breathed his innovations and reforms.

In kindergarten, I learned to speak French and then actually used 1t in the oty where I lived. When I grew up, I went to the best party m the country every July 1st. On Canada Day, everyone 1s a good mood m Ottawa. The whole town takes a day off and parties, first under the hot sun, and then under a shower of fireworks and well mto the wee hours.

Not that parties are only a once-a-year event in Ottawa. Contrary to Widespread belie~ Ottawa is not dull. There's a totally vibrant club and live music scene. The only thing it lacks in comparison to Toronto's scene are obnoxious lineups at dubs whose owners think they're running Studio 54. The Byward Market is fun not only at night, but also has the best patios for summertime afternoons of people-watching and sangria-

tO

\l.s \hat are an mtegra\ pan o[

Cn"J1l.'red uriJiiUJ life-._ one

provincial park is jusr minures a·way. In rhc winter, Torootonians trek up to Blue

-SOC.

()1\C

dally

klln11Jc trc:

Mountain to ski down hills. Ottawans can grab their skis and lut world-class slopes 10 less time than it takes a Torontonian to complain about a "cold weather alert" of

you risk gemng trampled b} the screaming hordes of high school students in front of the Liquor Dome.

Ottaw-a had a high tech boom, but it doesn't have one anymore. Just ask the cab drivers.

Ottawa has nice names for ~orne of its neighbourhoods, such as Sandy Hill, or the Glebe, bur Ottawa also calls tts downtown core "Centretown." I'm sorry. That is just silly.

Ottawa has restaurant.~, but they arc all bad, except for two, one of which I cannot afford.

Ottawa has lovely cultural institutions, but there is only so much one can get out of them. The National Gallery currcndy has as an installauon featuring 40 speakers, set up in a circle around a large room, With each speaker projecting a single, unique voice from a 40-person choir. It is enchanting.

The Museum of Civilisation currently has a display of human remains that were preserved m peat bogs for 3,000 years. It is fascinating. But seeing both of these exhibits will occupy about one hour of your time.

Then what do you do? Head to the Canadian Aviation Museum?

Ottawa has "Parhament, but "Par\iament is boring. \ went to Question \~enoo. \ \istened

The good editors of Ultra Vires-employing powers of persuasion rarely found among the non-Moonie population-have somehow convinced me to write a paean of Toronto and, by implication, a condemnation of Ottawa.

Trouble is, I can't do it in good faith. For one thing, I love that big small town on the Ottawa River, with its beavertails, canal skating, and peculiar affection for buses.

Sure, Ottawa has problems. It's the second coldest world capital. It's as qwet as a frat house on Saturday morning. Its train station, unlike those in real cities, 1s not located downtown. Its hockey team has bowed out to superior opposition in the playoffs for three years running. William Burrill, former columnist for eye, noted that "Ottawa" is actually an acronym for "Only Town That Americans Wouldn't Attack" in the War of 1812. And Pierre Trudeau, God bless him, said that the best thing about Ottawa was the road to Montreal.

But I digress. Rather than resorting to cheap shots about our nation's capital, I

~omeone

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Ottawa also has Wincerlude, but reallJ; who has ever been mspired by a swanshaped block of ice?

Ottawa has courts (both federal and supreme), and thus has clerk.~ which is good, because clerking IS a v.-onderful thing to do. But Toronto has clerks too.

Noah Gilttrmaff gradt~alld from the Fa01f!y of Law rn 2002, affd is Olmffi!J derJei,g a/ tht

Ftdtral Com of Canada.

will wnte three paragraphs m defence of our largest city, which also happens to be My Home Town.

First, Toronto's architecture am't all bad.

Yes, the Brutalism angel passed over this cicy and bestowed us With many horrible buildings. Like Robarts Library. Like the Rogers building at Jarvis & Charles. And like Grad House, with all of the appeal of a ~'ehrmacht bunker on the French coast area 1943. But Toronto's gems go unvisited by many tourists and, dare I say it, law students. There's the Flatiron, St. Lawrence Market, and the Gooderham & Worts factory. The Beach features one of the best examples of neo-classical architecture on this continent, its status as a sewage treatment plant notwithstanding. And there are those sleepy brick enclaves of Leaside, Yonge & Eligible, and the Annex.

Second, Toronto's got some great parks.

Whoever said that parks are the lungs of a city had it right. Check out High Park in the fall. Jog along the Beltway. Rollerblade

PLEASE SEE MBITES,. PAGE 16

11 ~---~------

Love manoeu res

Let love rule gh law school1s one of the least sexy locales on the planet, many students have followed tn Dean Ron Darucls' footsteps and found ove right here in the good ol' £<lavelle. \nd even though law school tends to take over one's hfe, snll other students have full and sat. g relationships with non-lawyers, complete with thin~ like marriage and bab1es. Cunous? The stones below gtves you a glimpse into e hidden lives and loves at U of T law. Ah, sweet love!

We've all heard Dean Daniel's speech about the day he met his lovely wife in law school, and now we sec them as a dynamic and interesting couple. But how do you get from A to B? How do you go from staring at your true love in contracts, to signing your very own pre· nup? The secrets lie in non-verbal commurucanon. Human beings are highly evolved creatures. We pick up thousands of signals that help us navigate our way through the world, dominanng nature and inventing things like war and Archie comics. We perceive most of these signals without our conscious knowledge. We get "vibes" and "impressions." Imagine what would happen if you could manipulate how another person picks up "vibes"!

"Wonderful," you sar Well, imagine no more; the dream has become reality through the magtc of behaVIoural analysis. Read on for Miss B's "Three Steps to True Love through the ExplOitation of Non-\'erbal Communication Systems."

Alth

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BY DANIEL ANTHONY

tlphmr. I had arrived LL.M. It was September Qt. Searc,birig for an JP conference, I asked crus cute guy where BLH was. As a Masters student, J had no classes there. His answer seemed a bit rude, as if he was wondering how a law student could ask such an obvious question. .And J thought, darn, he was so cure ...

Danitf I met Delphine ar Law Ball the next term, she was ~itting at my table, I struck up a conversation. She said she \~:as an LL.M. student and we had met back m September. My first reaction was, "Darn ... a graduate student. .. won't go for some first year. She's probably much older." I couldn't remember seeing her before, since I must have met 200 people back in September. Thinking there was no chance, J launched into a conversation about dating and asked her if she knew any good-looking single girls at the party. ..

Dtlphinr. First Daniel didn't remember me from September, then he asked me if I knew any single guls ... Hello! I took it in a stride.

Who knows with Canadian guys? Then he a~ked the age of the oldest guy l would date. l might have said 27. 1 was surprised when be asked how o\d \Willi. When\ answeTd 23, he changed comp\etely ...

Dun/~f.

When I found our sh~ wa..• my age I

~.Apparently m

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my mis

Europe, law is a first degree, so an UJ.M. student can be about the same age as a first year Uoff law studett Reversing course, I managed to squeeze in a slow dance- at Hart House, then outsmarted some competition a e after-party. We danced till three a.m. The next da I wanted to call; but had no last name, no number, d finals were j t around the corner. I went for anyway. Iindsa Forbes supplied the info, and date was set ...

Dtlpht . I was happy Daniel tracked me down, but we soon found out he was leaving in May, d I would be back in France by August\ A long-term relationship was out, but I didn't let it stop us.

Daniel. Delphine e-mailed me in June, writmg that she was staying in Canada. We had said our good byes in May ...

Whatever, thought. In e-mailed, free Sept.

"'~

e alld' LQ~

BY STEVE SAVILLE

When I came to Toronto, I was advised that I should definitely NOT date anyone from law school. I was told that It was a recipe for disaster. If thmgs didn't work out JUSt nght, my life at the school would be a living hell. This is a small place, and there is no way of avoiding people. When you consider how girls are known to talk, if I scrt.-wed up really badly, I could find myself trying to evade much of the female population at this school. It's kind of a scary thought. With this in mind, I kept my head down for quite a while and tried ro avoid any consideration of the women here as potennal girlfriends.

Last year at Law Ball everything changed. I was approached by a friend in third year that told me a certam first year thought rhat I was "dreamy." r was a bit confused... I hadn't rt.'lllly heard the ~'Ord "dreamy" since I stopped watching the Brady Bunch. When 1 found out who the first-year girl was, however, I was also a bit intrigued.

I considered the situation. On the om: hand, she was a really interesting person ... and quite cute (am I not right here, guys?). ( )n the other hand, this was a first-year female who had three other law school roommates (i.e. one bad move, and 1 could estrange much of the first-year class!). '\s It WJI.8. I

1lo"'l8

IJOUIB mro t.IUrd year. and

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stopped caring about my life at Jaw school. So, 1 figured that maybe it was time to take a chance on this type of thing.

What is it like being a law school couple? Well, of course it's very glamorous, and it really isn't as scary as l thought. l'nlike many people that are dating a law student, Megan and I get to see each other pretty much every day.

Sometimes, it is JUSt for a few minutes here and there, but it is still a lot more than most people see their law student girl/boyfriend. Megan is also very nice, kind, special, oh ... and she is very good at spelling, very funny, very smart, a very good singer, and likes movies. I could go on... but most importtndy, Megan is a wonderful girlfriend I

BY DOUGLAS SANDERSON It is morning and my hands are pressed flat agamst my wife's belly. Sun filters through the blinds, and casts striated shadows across the scene. I am looking down, looking at my hands, feeling her skin, and then 1t happens. Something moves. Something, someone, is being formed and is movmg around just an inch from my hands. Somewhere in that swelling belly is our first child.

Tanya and I started talking about children soon after getttng married. But it was talk, like talking about the weather or a labour strike in Braztl. It seemed distant and abstract. We called it the "proJect''-a Sartrcan sort of project.

L1ving with Tanya, loving her, holding her hands m distant corners of the globe, is dreamily good. Why not, we thought, add to our adventure?

And so, in time, we decided. We would try to have children. I say try, because when you start talking to people about this, you discover that having children is not as easy as you thought. You hear stories about people "trying" for years. I was willing to try, and then, after thinking about it for a few seconds, I was eager.

But, 1f you are a man of a certain age, and you have spent coundess hours trytng to have sex and NOT get someone pregnant, then you have no idea how difficult it is to deode to have sex with the intent of getting someone pregnant I could not complete the deed. It was like suffering from some weird reverseCatholic guilt: I could not waste my seed. A couple of days passed. I had a shot of bourbon. I watched women's volleyball. I took deep breaths and focused on the goal. Not my best work from a process standpoint, but on the substantive end ... Tanya was pregnant three minutes later.

And now, seven months into the project, I'm happy to report that all is well.

The project 1s takmg shape. Tanya glows. Both men and women offer her seats on the bus. I keep a record of her belly SIZe in my daybook.

I, on the other hand, do not glow. I worry. But then it takes me awhile to

BY BRENDA DIDYK

El ·

• 1 Eye Contact.

Nothing says Iovin' like a long, lingering look. That come-hither or "copulatory" gaze is qwte a different creature from the everyday glances we bestow upon mere passers-by. Here's how it's done: catch your curie's gaze, and hold it. Look deep into his or her eyes. Count to five, blink once, then count to four. Slowly lower your eyehds and look down. Bite your pen in a fetchmg manner if you happen to have one handy. Smile softly as if laughing at some mysterious joke. Look up again into your beloved's eyes for a brief, fliny glance. Entrancingl Irresistiblcl Devastatingly adorable! Renowned anthropologist Desmond Morris has stated that prolonged and intense eye contact indicates one of two emotions: amorous inclinations or aggressive desires. You either want to make love to the person into whose eyes you gaze, or you would like to hit them on the head with your Income Tax Act. Thus, the importance of getting this look just right becomes paramount. It's all about technique. One false eyelash twitch and your baby will flee the scene. With clus in mind, try to be natural m your "look." Practice the "look" over and over again in the mirror to make it more natural.

Touch his or her ann.

Th1s move never fails. It is the first and last flirting technique I have ever learned or ever needed. Now, to be sure, it is particularly risky to attempt this move in a law school setting.

You mu~t take care not to offend your intended when trying to establish physi.ca\ contact, as s/he ma)' ?O»sib\y sue )IOU fc>~ assau\t <n f\\c hua'!>llmcnt charges. Thetdote, be sute youT cand1date for "Honey-Bunny of the Year' 1s comfortable with you before you attempt thl'

warm uf> •·• dung" I worry about money, about paytng the rent, and student loan-...•uu.l '\Whot.t th(· futun: huh.\~. lt •~ the: end nf rny th\rd year of \a"" schoo\

and 1 don't even have a summer job. Well, not one that pays, since my job from here on out ts that of father, and not employee. And 1 know that the bills will get p:ud, and no one will starve. Recently, I have come to think that if all goes well, Tanya and I will be able to take pottery classes at a community college by as early as 2020.

My hands are pressed flat agamst my wife's belly. The sun shines in through the blinds and then something moves; somewhere not far from my hands, grows our first child. In the rrurror, I can see that we are both smiling, but not at each other. We are both looking down, looking at our hands on Tanya's belly and at the shadows that fall across our arms, and both of us are smiling a sweet, innocent smile of bliss, both of us, all three of us, happy.

Jlrtll 7<>uCh. The ,\rm 7ouch

IS .tJOC

a srab or II 8T"Of>C. II

I.~ II sendc hand l•id on d1c fVrt;'

arm of your interiocuror during an appropriatdy intimate or lighthearted moment in the conversation. Perhaps she's told you a funny joke, or maybe he rold you about how sad he was when his pet turtle, Stuart died. In any event, take this opportunity to make physical contact. It should be a bnef touch, with the fingertips lingering ever so slightly as the hand is removed. You must leave them wanting more. The Arm Touch is useful also because it allows you to test out the waters; you can gauge your beloved's reaction to see whether or not your affection is returned. Did they lean in tou.'llrds you? All signs point to yes. Did they stiffen slightly, and then relax? Proceed with caution. Did they recoil? Forget it and return to step one with someone else.

G .

drink.

Okay, so this isn't exactly non-verbal. But drinks are so much better than coffee.Your goal to get out of the stressed-out law school mode and into a relaxed and romantic space.

Atmosphere is key. The right decor and lighting will put your darling into the right frame of rrund. And now, I leave it in your hands-state your case and convince the curie tb2t you are the law student of his or her dreams. Good luckl

1S

Did you send a note to someone? Do you think someone sent a note to you? UV decided to play cupid this year, so take a peck below to find out if anyone has a secret crush on you-know-who ... would be able to get summaries. I've To A!J Burglar on the Rot-k.r, hitched myself to Steve's star and I am Your eyes are so big and soupy, going to ride it as far as it takes me. See ya They make my insides go all goopy. on the flip side ...

Like t\\'0 fried eggs, From Miss M. S/nlarl staring up from my plate, They make me want to ask you for a date.

S.KG., Meet me for brunch on Sunday?

I'm not so good at rhyming Dr. Bta11 And apparendy I have bad timing For I've waited too long Mr. Pho~ogrtzphtr, And now you've gone Your brightly coloured folders make me Into the arms of another love. go, "Ooohh."

Your bold and beautiful screensavers make Don't you want me baby?

Don't you want me, oh? me go, "Aaahh."

Put us together, J.G. and M.W. do undeniably know, and we can make music forever. that being numbers 2 and 3 To Mr. S. Sflllillt, is about the show. ..;..ban __ d.~__ True, that I already,....:.h~ ave ;:;...;;: m;J_ _~-I came to law school to find a hus Upper year was preferable because then I numberone-y,

Who is clearly my foremost "Honey," But there is no way we'll ever forget, That fateful night when us four first met.

Thanks for the polygamous luvin,

Your "auid!J" Valentine

But you lurdly notice me, it seems.

Perhaps someday, Perchance a rune, When you'll say in MCR, "Will you be my Valentine?"

To Q. Shalaman,

Dear D.S.,

I know the Bonhomme has stolen your heart, But for that I think you're a bit too smart.

Your green, slanted-collar sweater Has caught my eye, Whyohwhy Wouldn't you like to give love a try?

You have the best hat in the whole school If I follow you to the Ballroom, will you let me buy you a beer?

Lo~.~t,

Sa11dra Dte

MH, Cashmere wishes, Taffet2. dreams, How I hope for your heart,

Your Semt Admirer Dear SoJto Voa, Roses are red, violets are blue I'm Jaded, and so are you.

Let's get jaded together.

Chern

(

OPINION & EDITORIAL

12 EDITORIAL

The ivory tower on Queen's Park Crescent

OPINION

The double bind of affimative action

Editor.

U.S. Supreme Court to rule on university race policy

campatgn prom1se of more bursaries and scholarslups help' Substantial assistance could only come after applytng for muchdreaded loans, and be based largely on prior indebtedness (zero for me). w·hy appl} and mcur increased debt, gambling on potential ly limited bursaries? The stakes would be too high for me, even for a J.D..

1t saddens me that, because of the prohibitive cost, I could have missed out on such an amazing expencncc. I'm grateful that I applied when I did; even a year's dela} could have made all the difference.

Unfortunately we may never know the real, lasting consequences of high tuition, as the voices of those turned away are mute.

So long as U of T is perceived as a basllon for the elite who can afford it, all we'll continue to hear are our jeenng peers across the country. Poisoned lake indeed.

- Nai!"a Shitji, Class of 2003

ago, George Tenant, Director of the Central Intelligence Agency, 1n a report whoch rccctvcd a lukC"-'arm acceptance by the lJ_<.;, administration, detailed these finding.. and

further suted that Jraq has nCJther the capa-

A Bush administration once again tries to convince the world that it is justified and necessary to bomb the cities of Iraq. bility to produce weapons of mass destruction nor any intention to deploy such weapons against the United States.

Nonetheless, the U.S. administtanon has been beating the drums of war and bullying the other members of the United Nations to comply with its request. Early estunatcs by the U.N. predict that a war against Iraq will cause at least 500,000 casualnes among the men, women, and children of Iraq.

These people are not merely foreigners, but are fellow human betngs who are our brothers and sisters. Before we unleash the ternble, destructive capactty of war we should demand credible eVIdence, rather than unsubstano.ated alleganons, from our leaders. We should demand that all means of peaceful resolution be exhausted.

The human spmt moves with great dJfficulty against the apathy of conformity, particularly when the issues at hand seem as perplexmg as they do in the case of conflict.

We must look to figures such as Dr. King to gwde us, and we must not let ourselves be mesmerized by uncertainty. For the sake of humanity, for the sake of innocence, for the sake of JUSilce, it is up to us to rally for the cause of peace. We must, as Dr. King urged, "break the silence ... [W)e must speak ... (A) time comes when silence is betrayal."

13

A better way to go Bathroom signs baffle

rices.

1 Ward Connerly, famous for his opposition to racial preferences because he ts he Supreme Court of the United black, filed an amicus curiae brief Wlth the States recently agreed to hear a case Supreme Court in which he quoted a pre\1mvolvtng one of the most di\;sive ous court decision that stated, "The pnncttssues in the U.S.-affirmative action. The that ethnic discrimination is wrong ts plc Jusnces "ill dec1dc whether applicants to the what makes discrimination against groups University of Michigan and its law school of which we are not members wrong, even I were unconstitutionally passed over because if the beneficiaries arc members of groups they were white. whose fortunes we would like to advance."

The stated goal of the University's policy Injustice today does not correct injustice in is to achteve a more diverse student body. the past-it merely continues it in a differ\\'hilc constitutional issues surroundJng the ent form. eyual protection clause arc at the heart of This is the double btnd of affirmative the appeal, the case embodies a much larger Besides giving many people an acnon. It begins with a presumption that all question confronting American society: is entrenched interest in their groups arc equal, so thetr results in life afftrmati\·c action, based on raoal prefershould be equal Ir then employs ameliora· ences, necessary? status as victims, affirmative rive mechanisms that end by enshrining the \ffirmative action presupposes that notion that the groups arc nor equal and minonty and whtte students are eyually tal- action can often harmthose it probably never >will be. Affirmative action ts ented but unequally treated due to racism should in theory help. an idea that subverts its own aims. past and present. Its promoters typically In his renowned dissent in Plessy v. promise on some future day, the program Ferguson, Justice Harlan of the Supreme being punished under the affumative action will die away from lack of need, once the Court of the United States stated that "Our at the time, as their sucprograms exisring current tnjustlce in soctety is corrected. constitution is color-blind, and neither cess rates 10 college admissions were dispro Unfortunately, thts argument fails to CCC· ognizc the injustice affirmative action itself portionatcly high, and had to be cut down to knows nor tolerates classes among citizens."

For \mcricans, the current case before the perpetuates. The policy is predicated upon make way for other minoril)· groups.

This is the dilemma for supporters of court represents what may be the final desthe belief that certain designated groups can explain away thetr lack of success because afftrmative action. On the one hand, they tination on a long journey to completely· they arc \;ctims. The result of thts mindset want all heritages and groups to be equal. rcalve the essence of the Equal Protection is that many persons blame their failure on On the other hand, like Orwell's pigs, they Clause. More broadly, however, the case rhe people who have succeeded, turnrng d1at ~ant some to be more equal than others. offers a chance, as Conncrly notes, to leave success from a legitimate source of pride The promised utopta envisioned by sup· behind the mistake~ of the pa~t and move into proof posiuvc of blame. This breeds porters thus ne\·er materializes, and in its forward into an era of liberty without regard resentment on horh ends. as rhc c:retknrial~ pl:!n• W(' often SC<' the n1osr ironic of in1usro race. True cqu.tluy dcn1;mds notlw~g /c.'·'·

BY BROCK JONES

In consideration of peace

ultra vires

11 FEBRUARY2003

Letters to the Editor

1 have followed the twnon debate with both interest and constcrnanon. Reading about the Provost's "study" tn the last U\ only added to my frustration. ln the debate, only select "stakeholders" have any inputignoring the future law students who will efore coming to law school, did you I forrable. In class, we should take care not acrually shoulder the burden. Of course, know about scction IS of the Charter of to bc flippant about those who hold postthose currently at U of T can "afford" it, tions \H! constdcr antithetical to our own.

Rights and Freedoms? Did you contcmeither through their own resources or \\;th plate the complex intcrplar of social norms They may be wrong, but we need to take financtal assistance. Thus, lugher tuition is and legal rights? Did you belicve that denythe rime to point our why. no deterrent for those already attending the ing pnsoners the right to vote was unconIrwin Cotler, MP for Mount Royal and law school. However, we may never hear stitutional? one of Canada's eminent legal mmds, tells from those who may be intimidated by the Probably not. But you probably a Stof) about the first moor he judged at fmancial burden that attending U of T \vill do no\\: Law school provtdes, among other McGill's law school. He asked the mooters entatl. thin~. an education 1n the meanmg and to present thetr opposing counsel's case Vismng UBC this year has given me implications of individual rights-a power- / tnstead of thctr own. The pedagog:tcal some perspective. Seeing peers who paid a ful and exciting liberal agenda of change. / point: if you don't understand where your third what I did last year, I can't help but However, there's a pomt at which opponents are coming from, your own unagine m} financial situation had I done progressive discourse may fatl: when we / argument is likely to be rncoherent or at my entire degree here. For a start, I certainInternalize enlightenment to the extent that least incomplete. (One of the mooters ly wouldn't have had to rely on government we become blind to-or worse, glibly dispromptl} fainted.) and professional loans, or stretch my narmissive of-illiberal opmions.

We deal with deeply controversial issues, row budget in expensive Toronto.

There IS an irony here. Diversity is a hot and yet we forget that they're controversial Don't get me wrong-I don't ever regret topic around schoo~ but we tend .not to because we arc too often unable to see the attending U of T, despite the cost. What I think of tt in terms of diversity of worldother side's view. After spending a week at will say 1s, that were I to choose a school VIew. Take any socially dJvisivc 1ssue, like law school you rmght clunk everyone who now, I wouldn't apply to U of T. Would the capital punishment, abortion, same-sex resists the progressive agenda is a banjomarriage, or _\borigtnal self-government. strumming yokel But many people do so Chances are that most students and profs because of deeply-held beliefs, whether OPINION come down on the same side of the debate. religious, philosophical, political and otherRest a.~sured: this is not a reactionary \ wise. In fact it's probably no stretch to say , rant. All we're trying to say is that this cona significant number of people outside "'ensus does nothing to encourage us to these hallowed halls arc uncomfortable or

BY EHSAN ZARGAR cons\uex w'hy we ho\d the be\ids we do. at \east ambivalent about big chunks of the •'-nu \.'na\. ~e o£ ,.c.\£ <e~ec:.non-<.'na\\cnl!,~ ~'0\l.'e""we av,enda. ln t.hc..e orphaned time& of 1ncc~!\ant\y ing our own sense of justice a.~ a precursor ) To repeat: we are nor advocating illibcr- ) shifting identities and alliances, the search to rt:Jnforong JC ·is wh:Jt law- w.:hool 1.~ sup.UU.rn or moral rc:ha•·Jsrn . .~111 we J:c saytng IS for secunty bas blmded us to the lessons of posed to be about. We deal Wlth complex that liberalism requires a rigorous underthe past. The dream and legacy of Dr. Jssues, and we owe it to ourselves to standing of the other side in order to be Martin Luther King, Jr. shines brightly upon explore them, even if it makes us uncomtrue to Itself all subsequent generations, exposing our relativism and apathetic inclinations. His vision transforms our indifference into compasSIOn and mercy, and leads us tow.u:ds justice and peace.

Ultra Vires is the independent student newspaper of the Dr. King, said, in expressing his views on Faculty of Law at the University of Toronto. the war in Vietnam, "I speak as a child of God and brother to the suffering... I speak Edilor-in-Chief Salman Haq for those whose land is being laid waste, Assistant Editors-in-Chitj Bernina Butt, Alexandra Dosman whose homes are being destroyed, whose Divmtons Ian Rlchler, Robin Rix culture 1S being subverted."

Edilorial/ Opinzon Michel Beshara These words give us much to contemFtatum Brenda Didyk plate on the eve of yet another war. Once Legal Issues Adam Rock again, a Bush administranon 1S poised to Production Manager Emily Mak flex its military might against one of the Business Manager Simren Desai world's poorest nauons. Iraq is a nation that CoP.J Editor Caroline Libman has suffered much. It 1s a nanon whose Online Edilors David Khan, John Norquay leader was thrust into power by America Photo Editon Lisa Cavton, Adeline Kong and its allies, a leader who subsequently left Communi!J Notzct Board Manager Jennifer Villebrun the country shattered by war. The country's people were starving as a result of punitive sanctions, and were being poisoned by the Contributors residue of military weapons.

Ke.ith Burkhudt, HELMUT, Adrian Uu, Jonathan Desbarats, Jory Grad, Lsa Minuk, A Bush admirusttation once again tries to Steve Saville, Douglas Sanderson, Dan~el Anthony, Simren Desai, Ben Perrin, Joanna Fine, convince the world that tt is jusufied and Jutta Burtnee, Kat Kinch, Erfat Arbe~ Adam Rock, Paul Galbraith, Ehsan Zargar, Brock necessary to bomb the cities of Iraq, to Jones, Brian Mayes, Petra Fisher, Chns Essen, Juda Strawczynski, Motek Sherman, Noah break-up families, to destroy lives, lovers, "The Gtt" Gitterman, Ronan Levy, Owen Bick, Caroline Libman, James McClary. fnends, and homes, and to create another generanon of dJsplaced, desperately hopeless lraq1 refugees. All of this, under the Ultra Vires is an editorially autonomous newspaper. We aim to reflect diverse points of pretext of counter-terrorism, and under the view, and we welcome contributions from students, faculty and other Interested persons. guise of removing weapons of mass Ultra Vires reserves the right to edit submissions for length and content. destruction.

Despite allegations by the Bush adminisCommunications Centre, Falconer H~ 84 Queen's Park Crescent tration, no credible evidence has been preToronto, Ontario, MSS 2CS, (416) 946-7684, ultta.Vlfes@utoronto.ca, www.ultravires.ca sented that Iraq has ties to the perpetrators Advertising inquiries should be sent to the attention of the advertising manager at of the tragic events of September 11th or ultra.vires@utoronto.ca the anthrax attacks in the U.S. Some months

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ULTRA VIRES

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of mmority mdtvtduals arc viewed with suspicton, and whites that succeed arc assumed to have done so unfairly.

Besides giving many people an entrenched interest in their status as victims, afftrmative action can often harm those it should in theory help. Some of the greatest supporters of California's propos111on 209, which prevented racial preferences in the realm of public education, were the state's J\sian commuruttcs. This was for the simple reason that •\stan students, ironically, were

ht charactenzcd as the communitarian response to homclessncss. The communiIn February of 2000, 1 trooped tnto the tartan position, in his view, was representMoot Court Room to hear Professor ' ed by municipal government iruuatives that would have eliminated, or curtailed, Jeremy Waldron's Cecil \.Wright Memorial Lecture entitled "Homdessness the use of public space bv the homeless and Communil)·," which was later pub to panhandle, bathe, urinate, or defecate. lishcd in the Fall 2000 edition of the In fact, commumtanan scholars such as Denrus ~affron and Stephen \arosh have L ntversity of Toronto L'lw Jourml.

Waldron's lecture was a philosophical been advocating reform of public housing analysis of homclessness that seemed to make it safer and more livable, thereby enunciaring a vision that will make public almost dehberatcly naive about political responses to the problem. housing tenants seem more like full · \Xby is a 2001 graduate of U of T I .aw fledged members of the communi[}· to School \vriting about this lecture three the general public, and less like some y<.:a rs after the f.1ct? Because I have some thrt-atcrung "Other." advice for current students. The guest 1bis conccpuon of communttanarusm speakers at U of T Law arc great, but take 1 was, however, at odds Wlth the "nor in my backyard" version that Waldron convcruentadvantage of your nmc at the faculty to ly put forward in his speech and article, and challenge them. 1f you are simply going to listen to d1eir arguments uncritically, why was therefore left unmentioned. Waldron's bother? \X'hat ts the gain for the communi- 1 approach to the problem of homclessncss ty, aside from addtng a list of famous was to debate whether the distress caused to the average ciwcn by seeing a homeless names to the annual calendar? Gtven the person should be measured as a social harm school's professed desire to welcome disor as a social good. Somehow, he never sent, maybe this article can help encourage mentioned a truly communitarian idea: studenn; to ask quesuons of these speakers. building more social housing.

When I sat to on the Wnght lecture 10 Dunng my years at U of T law the 2000 I wasn't g:tven the opportunil) to term "communitarianism" was occasionaladdress \X'aldron. Had 1 been allowed to ly bandied about by the facult:}; though no challenge the speaker, 1 would have two profs sctmcd to agree on what the brought up the following points. concept meant. Perhaps understandably, \\'aldron fashioned himself as a none of the faculty at Waldron's address defender of the civil liberties of the questioned him on his characterization of homeless. His speech and subseyuent arti· "communitarianism." Instead, the focus de were a wide-ranging cntiquc of what

I 1 1

I neither understand nor a~k to understand the mysteries of running our fmc faculty.

• cverthclcss, since my first week here I have found myself unable to srop wondering at one particular phenomenon, unique in my experience, which defies all mr attempts at rational explanation and continually keeps me amused when visiting the bathroom. I refer, of course, to the signs in every stall that sternly warn us to flush after we go.

Note the plural. ot JUst a sign in every stal4 but several stgns. The first question that comes to m1nd ts, "\X'hy will more signs work 1f one won't?" The only way I can explam thts IS b} refernng to psychology- the beleaguered, frustrated, at theend-of-the· rope person who apparently is forced to flush the toilets after the mysterious offender doesn't do so is, through their use of multiple signs, making the strongest possible statement of hatred short of a death threat. While plausible, thiS explanation is unsatisfyrng, particularly if you still cherish the hope that law school 1s an institution that promotes rationality and good Judgment.

My questions do not end here. Snll more rntngurng than the histrioruc proliferation of s4,>nage is the goal of the si.gns in the fm>t place. Of course, it is hoped that they ,..;n cau"e flushing to occur. H.o....·c"ct, doesn't it .~cern that the initial fitilun• co flush musr bear further inquiry? Whilc.: 1,

myself, have never noticed a law ~chool , toilet in any bur a pristine stare, I wonder what concate·nation of events led to the original signs being placed. Presumably, no one would have bothered had they only \vas almost entirely on the nature of the found the tOilets unflushed once or twice. rights involved in a confrontation This suggests that the problem was at lea.~t between, say, an average pedestrian and a frequent, if not worse. God forbid that homeless person. Only the dean, in disthere should have been an actual anti cussing how law and economics might flushing conspiracy-and still more that approach the problem, offl.. red ~orne alterthis should be a case of the entire populanative that was not a variation on "nghrs tion of the school suddenly forgetting the based" cnutlement. most basic of human etiquette. ,\ssum.ing \Valdron concluded that we need more that there was only one perpetrator, do we than a "vague sense of social obligation" not need to inquire as to their motivations? in dealing with the problems of the Thts is all starting to feel a lot like a homeless. However, his means of address· crim class .. . we know what the actus reus mg homclessness was simply to defend is- but was there mens rea? If it's mere the ongotng usc of public space for sleep· negligence, then perhaps one sign would ing and bodily funcuons. This approach is be justified as a reminder. One sign. A sinlittle more than a celebranon of the gle sign. "majesoc legal equality" that allows the If you ask me, however, everything poor as well as the rich to sleep on park points towards a guilty mind. After all, I benches. Communitarianism, whatever its have it on good authority that the men's flaws, ts at least to search of a concrete washrooms also ft-ature signs instructing and long-lasting means of addressing the the boys to flush. This suggests that the problem of homelessness. perpetrator sneaks into the bathrooms It would have been useful to have heard barred to them by gender and goes out of some debate at that lecture three years ago, his or way to cause trouble. If this is in to have heard that some issues involve real fact the case, are stgns really going to help? world politics, rather than classroom musIf the person who doesn't flush is doing ings on posttivc and negative rights. so out of malice, surely the poqcrs will Remember that it's unportant to stand up onl} encourage his or her dastardly ways. and ask your quesoons-thc people runW'lule we're on the subject, what on ning the show may not feel any "vague earth m~ght be motivating the lack of sense of social obltgation" to let you speak. flushing? What sort of twisted mind .. . there must be a better way to protcst Brian May<s ;,radualtdfrom the FaC11I!J of Low tuition increases. Of course, this is jus t a

Critical thinking crucial in and outside class

BY BRIAN MAYES

BY PETRA ASHER

i11 Jum 200 I. Ht is currenlfy praclid11g lnu• uilh RfD; Johnston and Cofllj>at!) ilt Brandon, Ma11iloba.

I

PLEASE SEE "REVELATORY," PAGE 16

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14

ULTRA VIRES

LOVECASTS

Fish fantasies fulfilled

--

Lust for the law

by Alexandra Dosman,

My darling S -

writing as Eugenia Styles Aries March 21- Apri119 Vaknlinr's lrmra.sl: Be prepared for disappointmcnr, dear ;\ric:.. You arc inrt·n-.e 1\lld fiery and oft ·n expect roo much from your partner. Valennne'!' is no exC<.'flrion. You wanr the moon, ~ut ther'U onl) t ou a card. ,.\!ism and Matrhts: Amid \ ~ and .ancers- they'll only get on your nern-s. Gemiru ill make you happy and let )OU rake the lt:ad in the bedroOm. I {,Jt,Jf a muh on Ari(.f? J\1'"-ays let an , \ries think he or she is m charge - kt them pick die venue for the first date. Be prepared to go to a sporting event or an art museum. If )OU don't know anything about thts stuff do some research before-hand. Aries is turned on by big brains.

Taurus April 20 - May 20 I 'almhi1r's Formul: f'inatly - the Valentine's Da) you've always bn·n waiting for! 1r's all sann sheets and oysters this year. This will be a good dar, no matter what, so pay careful .mention and hold it in )·our heart for the rest of \vin tcr- tht• memory of tt will keep you \\-arm 'rill spring.

Misrts and MaldJu: Find yourself a Virgo and true love will be yours. Canct.".r and Capricorn arc also good matches. \void Aquari:ms and ~corptos- they arc too flaky for you.

I lavt a muh on 1imms1 Old-fashioned romance is the best 'o.\.-:1) to caprurc Taurus' hLmt - flowers, chocolates, cards am.\ candies -they're suckers for a\\ that sappy stuff.

Parts I and II left us lusting for answers to pressing questions...

Leo July 23- August 22 Valmtmf's Fortrasl: Leo, how many rimes have I told you you'll only get out of it what you put in. Isn't there a Beatb song about rhi !' Go lisrct~ to lt. Try your best this y u'll get favourable results.

Valentines and Missrs and \fa/rh.·s: \. ·rgo will gi c migraines and Taurus is a toothache. Sagittarius '" II soorhe you and Aries is a delicious energy drinl< that will make you tingle all m·er.

Hat't a mtsh on !Jo? Compliments and praise. Then more compliments. Then a little more praise. l 1ollow up with accolades, tributes, rave re\;cws and a sramc in their honour on the fronr lawn.

Pisces February 19 - March 20 I 'altnlillt 's Forerasl: Close your eyes and dream ... what do you fantasize about?

Count to ten, and open! Hooray! It's all there for you. The sun is moving inro your ~ign, giving you new energy and highlighting your attractive qualittcs. \'alcnnne's is the sweet opening movement to a month of harmonious symphonies ~md contrapuntal surprises. ;lfl..:ru IVId ,1/"td~r: /.co

Gemini Ma} 21 -June 20 1 rllmlinr's Fortmsl: Light and btt'C'I:)' in the mormng, srorm clouds gather and things get ht'll\'} t<m-ards c\·ening. \\ hy, Gem1111, arc you afra1d of tlungs gt·tting serir>Us? Just giH' lm·c a chance and it'll all be rambow~ and st.lrlight br mghtfall. It's up to )OU. ,\fum and Matrhts: Ixo and l.tbra arc good for you though the latter will burn a hole m your wallet quKkcr than }IIU can Sll} "Dmncr at Scaramouche?' Pisces and Cancer leave you cold. llat't a mt!h 011 Gemini? ,\uract Cemini by shmving off your qmrky and unconventional side. \void mentioning your recently purchased PC party membership.

Mims and .\1akfrr: Sagmarius IS .1 l.Xtter friend than lover and Capncorn JUSt exacerbates your moodmcss. Pisces is good, Virgo is better, but best of all is Scorpio.

I lat't a muh on Canar? Exploit Cancer's sensitivity by exposing him or her to rornannc movies and music. ( ancer will pick up these cues and turn amorous.

no ~o.

=

\nc.·~

-

sexy but unsrable. Gemini 0. For a good rime call Scorp10. llazr m.sh on PJSrr.r? They arc sentimental and sweet so be sure neva to forget anmversaric.:s. \trangely, tht:y arc also very interested m tht occult and other m ysterious phenomenon. They \\ill read this horoscope and believe it. Above all Ptsccs \Vant~ ro help; tell them about your problems and they'll be putty in your hands.

Virgo August 23- September 22 Valmtim 's rorrca.rl: You refined tastes '"ill lead you to seck out an elegant candlelit night- and you'll find it. The guy in the apartment bclo"v will blow a fuse again, leaving you unable to watch your Pride and Prejudice DVD as planned. Try reading the book, instead.

Atims and Matcbts: Libra and Gcmim will eventually cheat on you, despite their best intentions. (~o for 'Eturus instead.

They will srand by you 'rill the end. llat't' a muh on Virgo?\ ugos like practical gifts and appreciate subtlety in a partner, so don't be roo nosey on the first date and forgo the flowers in favour of a new mouse pad.

Libra September 23 - October 22 Valenlillt} Forecast: You've bought the fluffy bedroom slippers; you've arranged the silken pillows. Now ts your chance to put it aU to good use y6u wiU come down with a terrible cold and be bedridden all wecKi..'tld Your lover will drop by to feed you soup but that's a hot as tt gets.

Mwts a11d Matchu: In terms of cbst/benefit analysts· Cancer and Scorpio are mor r:roul: than t 're worth. Sagittarius, Leo and Aquarius ~ill provide a better return o n your investment.

Hat't a m~sh on ubra? Shower them with luxury and romance - Librans love love and aU its attendant accessories.

Scorpio October 23 - November 21 T a/mlmt 's Forl'c' st. You'rc tn a pushy mood for Valentines and your evening may have a rocky srart. Dtd you know restaurants ovcrbook on \ Da) by 30'% to allow for last mrnute cancellations due to relationship problems?

You'll actually make it to dmncr but your date \\ill storm off m a snit. Have a drink at the restaurant bar once they've gone and a beautiful stranger \\ill arrive to take thctr placc.>. .\lissts a11il A!atches: Cancer, Leo and Ptsces ~uit your tern perament. .\vmd Aquarians at all costs- you wtll never agree on anythmg.

Havt a muh on \'corpio? You can't fake It w1th Scorpiodon't pretend to be micrcstcd when you aren't. If you arc tnterested, howcvt·r1 take the oldest advice in the book and JUSt be yourself. If it's genuine, Scorpto will respond well.

Sagittarius November 22- December 21 I almhnt 's 1-ortcasl: Do vou remember that one you thought had left you fore er' T V're thinking about you right now. They will try to reach out to you in a fit of romantic optimism. Go f, . coff: · and you'll remember wh) you broke up. .\1iuts and ,\lattbes: Vtr~o ami Scorpio arc.; poor mates for you. \quarius may he a struRglc, hut has cxcdlent long term pos-.thihtu:s. l ..:o is .tlso won h

.1

trv, hut vou arc.• .

probahiJ hc:.st suuc:d to nrH,du.·r S.aguuu-r;.u ;, Hare a cmsb Oll.l''{l(illtmlf.r? Th q hkc to talk, so

make sure you can blather on about current CYents, bonks you've read and moncs you've st:en. Beware: Sagiuanans are commitment-o-ph<Jbes.

Capricorn December 22 - Januat') 19 l falmti111''s Formut: The ~cent 1cy \\Cather won't put a chill on your Valentmc ~ Da}, I sec warm snuggley blankets and lots of cu dling. Yt·s, it's true. You will enjoy a 10\·cly evening 'o.\1th our cal l·juff), \\<Oltching bad Friday mghr TV and eating tcc cre.nn.

Misses and J\1,,/c!JI'S: ,\void l.t:o, Gt:mini, Sagitta.rians and other Capricorns. Oppomes attract when you meet a cute P1sces and you can't go wrong with tough, dependable Taurus. lfat·t a cmsh 011 Capricom? Cnlike unconventional Gemini, Capricorn rends to be conservative. Don't tell them about your wacky dream of opening Toronto's firsr home for wayward houseplants/bubble tcashop.

Aquarius January 20 - February 18 Valmlint's hmra.rt: The sun is beginning to move out of your sign, so you may feel your energy waning. Your best bet is to phm a cozy evening on the couch wtth a bottle of wine - your lassttude will make you feel sleepy and sensuous. Go out and you risk a cranky evemng of picky bickcnng.

Misses and .Malrhts: Romances with Leos arc hot, but tend to fizzle. Gemmtts fun but fnendly. Sagittarius and Anes and sansfytng and amiable. \vo1d Taurus, Virgo and Scorp10.

Hat't' a mub on Aquamu( Woo your object of \quarian a~iration by planrung qwrky and interesting dates sctence museums arc especially good.

15

A NOVELlA IN FOUR PARTS

11 FEBRUARY 2003

Will first-years Lucy and Danny discover the mystery behind the decades-old love letters?

What past exploits are torturing Associate Dean Wentworth's soul?

Why is sultry graduate student Julia Struthers putting the moves on Professor Pordbam?

And, of course, Who will fill Dean Kin d le 's Gucci shoes when he retires?

You are the muff for my frigid digits, the canned summaries for my exam courses, the heavy for my metal...

My salvation, my inspiration, my love - How would I survive these halls without you?

Meet me in the pinball room after securities reg.

Your-M.

:Par! l.hree - :Pass1on 's 7reason atthew Pordham felt the blood drain from his brain. Julia. He had never had a gradonstance rose from behind uate student so sensuher desk, a purposeful look animating her mid- al, so sexy, so ready for him. He forties visage. She looked looked around him, satisfied at his good for her age, if a bit choice of locale for their first date. weathered; both qualities had Expensive and discreet, the little sushi restaurant had served him "I don't know," replied Lucy with served her well in her role as well in the past. Pordham squeezed Associate Dean.

She smiled to a contemplative inflection, "there's his middle-aged body into a secludsomething fishy about these let- herself. If only these young kids ters. Why were they hidden in an knew what this soul had lived! She ed booth to await her arrival. old library book on maritime law? grabbed her coffee cup and headed Why do they end abruptly in down the hall to the faculty

ucy and Danny sat huddled in a comer of the school cafeteria, captivated by the passionate prose of the Def-Leppard-era love letters. "Wow," said Danny, "who would have thought that law students could be so ... poetic."

B

l~cbru ..ry

o£ 1983?"

Don't write, don't call. I'm sorry, darling; it's over. - M

C

The final installment of Lust for the Law will appear in the next issue of Ultra Vires.

kitchen.

Intent on procuring some drinkable java, Connie didn't notice Anil Sharma until she was almost on top of him.

"Associate Dean," managed the new junior professor, "We can't give up now, Dannywe've got to get to the bottom of "hello." this mystery. And there is one "Oh hello," she replied, and felt a place that can reveal the truth strange sensation in her cheeks. about love."

I'm blushing, she thought in hor"The Bachelorette?" asked ror. She found herself staring into Danny, with a hopeful lilt to his Anil's deep mocha eyes, hypnotized by their unexpected intensity. voice.

"I was just... on my way ... " "No, silly," dismissed Lucy. " ... for some coffee?"

Gazing out the frosted windows, beyond the ivy and the puffmg "Yes, right, coffee." smokers, she concluded, "the Records Office."

Anil, normally a shy man, and "But we'd have to break in there! not in the least bit superstitious, Steal records! You're not say- could not help but recall the dying ing? ... " said Danny, trepitation words of a Lebanese witch he had tweaking his already high-pitched befriended on a steamship voyage across the North Atlantic: "You will voice. meet a woman, an intelligent "Oh yes," said Lucy with steely woman, a strong woman, strong determination. "I knew first-year woman, [yes, coffee!], where was I, Property would be good for some- a woman, [right!], your true love, thing. It's not theft if you don't take [yes, right, coffeel]" (She perished the physical piece of paperl As shortly afterward, tragically, from soon as you finish that wretched a caffeine-induced stroke.) panini, we'll get to work."

Anil Sharma stnlggled to retain his composure, and made the deciDear S - It's over. Please don't sion of his life. "Would you, could doubt my love; it burned with as I, I mean, could we get a coffee much intensity as a Lord Denning together?" rhapsody on cricket. But it cannot go on. I can no longer love you.

"Well, I guess we'll never know," sighed Danny, turning back to his wilted vegetable sandwich.

71(

Julia closed the bathroom door behind her and pulled the lock to.

She gazed at her face in the mirror, brought a hand up to caress her well-defmed jaw and generous lips.

I have to know the truth, she thought. Even if it means going all the way.

Cushy...

Cosmic.. .

Combustible.. .

HIGHER &LOFT LLP "More than just hot air"

ULTRA VIRES

16

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Porn cases elicit strong reactions

Iraq and international law "HIGH NOOW CONTINUED FROM PAGE 6 to preempt emerging threats, nor should naoons use preemption as a pretext for aggression" exposes the fluiclity of me pro posed standard. \X'e arc slippmg on a similar slope towards umlateral assessments on a second front, me Security Council. The Security Council was mtcnded to address prcctsely the sort of situation that we are now facing.

Irs very purpose is to deal with threats to international peace and secuncy, tf necessary through forcible measures. Strictly by me book, the usc of force to secure peace and secunty requires explicit authori7ation by the Council. It is notorious that the Council, due to the 'veto' power of its permanent members, has been suffering from paralysis.

Ir has explicttly authorized the use of force only twice: during the Korean War (1950) and in response to Iraq's invasion of Kuwait (Resolution 678(1991)). As a result, states have sought to find implicit authorization for collecove military intervenoons. Most notably, me United States has been arguing that a "material breach" of a Security Council resolution clears the wa} for enforcement action by -willing states. \X tth respect to Iraq, the argumem goes roughly like this: the cease-fire provided for in Resolution 687(1991) was contingent on Iraq's acceptance of various conditions, mc\udmg di!'.armament. In analogy to prinC\t~ks ot international ueaty \aw, if lraq is found to oc in "matcruU oteach" of this anan~eme\"\\, t'ne C.\OA"-e-tu<:. 'de.a\' '"' o££ a\"\u

the other 'conrracong' parries can resort to the earlier Ret;o/ution 678 aurhonzmg cl!c usc of force. This bongs us to Resolurion

1441. It finds Iraq in material breach of pre· vious resolutions, including 687, and gtvcs Iraq a last chance to comply. Any further non·compliance will be another material

Ottawa bites "TRONNA" CONTINUED FROM PAGE 9 past Sunnystde. \X'atch some cncket m Sunnybrook and walk up to Edward's (,ardens. \nd when the weather gets warmer, go for a picnic on the Islands.

Third, and most importandy, Toronto lives up to its Iroquois name of "meeting place." It's recognized as the most cultural· ly diverse city on the planet-more than London, more than New York, and I think

DIVERSIONS

11 FEBRUARY 2003

breach and, based on mspectors' report~.

"CHILD PORN" CONTINUED FROM PAGE 7 subject to Security Council assessment. The resoluoon reiterates earlier warrungs that Court of Canada, by a maJOOty of 6-3, Jraq w11l face "serious consequences" agreed that the offence of mere possession Secuncy Council 'code' for use of force. violated Sharpe's right to freedom of ln short, it IS I ltgh Noon at the Secunty expressiOn, but not in the manner Sharpe Council. Resolunon 1441 has not authostated. In essence, the Court decided that s. rized the usc of force. And it has reserved 163.1 did not constitute a "reasonable the Council's right to determine the ex.is- limit" on freedom of expression "in a free and democranc society" as required by s. 1 renee of continued material breaches. Yet, failing agreement in me Council once the of me Charter. The Court established this next inspectors' report is received, it i.~ likeby applying the four-part test rn Oakes. The Jy that the argument will be made that there majority· acknowledged that reducing harm is no need for (new) authorization of to children constituted a "pressing and sub"serous consequences" rn view of Iraq's stantial" objecnvc. It also accepted that pattern of material breaches. For a number there was a raoonal connection between the of rca~ons beyond me scope of this essay provision's obJective and its means. But it this argument is weak. "lonetheless, allowargued that s. 163.1 of the Criminal Code ing it to stand means gtVIIlg inclividual states ·was over-inclusive, and therefore <lid not much room to take Security Council matters represent the kind of proportionate limit into their hands. Put clifferendy, it is not by on s. 2(b) that the test in Oakes requires. It resisting the push for military acrion that the attempted to remedy t1us by reading two Council makes itself irrelevant, but by hidexemptions into s. 163.1 that address the mg in ambtguity. The Bush Administration possession of matenals that have been crets nght: me Security Council has ~o follow ated solely by the accused and arc intended through. It must either determine that force solely for his or her personal use.

The Supr~.;me Court of Canada sent the is warranted and aumonze it, or conclude mat force is not appropriate. ~\s with the case back to the British Columbia Supreme issue of "pre-empnve strikes," states must Court m January 2002. In March, the Court dectdc whether they value the exisnng found Sharpe not guilty of possessmg or framework, or are content to see it replaced dtstnbuong written child pornography, but by individual states' assessments of and guilty of rwo counts of possessing pornoresponses to "matcnal breaches." \ grap1uc ptctures of children. He was given a The existing law on the use of force canfour· month conditional sentence. not prevent unilateral actions. But 1t does The deci.ston was met Wlth what the CBC pmVlde a framework for evaluating such

described as "a -w-ave of public anger."

L'lwycr~ have criticized it on several dtfferent grounds. The dissent m the Supreme Court deciSIOn argued that the Court should have paid more deference to ParlL.'UTlent, which sought the pursuit of other constituoonal values such as the tnhcrcnt dignity of

[Sharpe was found] guilty of two counts of possessing pornographic pictures of children. He was given a four-month conditional sentence. each person and the self fulfillment of chil drcn. Osgoode Hall's Janine Benedet argues that the Court erred in focusing on freedom of expression m an abstract and hypothetical manner. Instead, they should have examined exceptions to s. 163.1 on the basis of documented child pornography cases.

Did the Supreme Court of Canada do the nght thing? I don't know. I have a one· year-old son and whenever I think of him, all my enlightened liberal notions rcgarcling legal rights clisappcar and I feel like kicking Sharpe's ass. The Supreme Court justices may have felt that way once or twice too, but that's one of the things that makes a case like R v. Sharpe, or Townshend's current en sts, so compelling.

a

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C\"en a smidgen more than Ottawa. \\'hcther your taste runs to exooc backgrounds, exotic food, exotic music, or exotic dancers, we've got it in spades.

I could drone on about Toronto's other strengths, like its streetcars and the fact that the Rolltng Stones rehearse here before therr tours. But, for now, I will simply state that Toronto-pronounced "Tronna" -deserves some credit. Hey, you're here for three years: you may as well enjoy it.

I

I

The Recruit Starnng: \1 Pacmo, Colin Farrell, Hndget ~loynahan D1recror: Roger Donaldson Ratmg:

**

Raring:

It might sound too good to be true: instead of researching employers anJ sellmg yourself to I IR personnel, the recnmcrs look you up and come nght to your doorstep.

That's what happens in The Rrm1il. Colin Farrell plays James Clayton, an MIT grad and hacker extraorJinain: who, perhaps ~cnsing the downturn in the high-tech mdustry, accepts an offer to join the Cl \.AI Pacmo plays \'falter Burke, a veteran recruiter for the ( I \ who pcrsuad<.s Clayton by offenng mformation about Clayton's father, who's been missmg for over a decade. It's your classic, "I knew your dadd} back in ''\lam" type of ploy~ but it works.

Clayton goes to CIA boot camp, affec tionatcly dubbed "The Farm," wh<.re he learns the tools of his trade: espionage, mtcrrogation, surveillance, and even how to pick up women (bewilderingly, one of the trainees' missions is to enter a bar and come out with someone willing to sleep \vith them). Clayton soon learns that "everything is a test": even after being captured and locked up for several days, hts captors turn out to be CI \ goons.

T he movie seem s promising in terms of the

Lath er son

n tctaph o rs

play~·d

out

between Clayton and Burke. Desptte 1us gruff exterior, Burke shows special mtcrest in Clayton, and Clayton is qutck to trust Burke. But the movie reveals too much too soon: it doesn't take long to realize that there's more to Burke. Even the mystery of Clayton's father is qu1ckly solved, with Burke constandy telling Clayton that "It's tn

' ' I have an undergrad in chemical engineering and

Omonia 426 Danforth Ave (416) 465-2129 Rating:**

really wanted to work with a variety of clients, especially those in the science sector.

Ogilvy Renault's approach '

BY JUDA STRAWClYNSKI

Andy Radhakant

Ottawa rocks

"BmER" CONTINUED FROM PAGE 13

"BYTOWN" CONTINUED FROM PAGE 9

bnef and preliminary inquiry into a fascmatlllg topic. I'm hopmg th:n thto\\.ing the •ssuc open this way could lead to more dtalot,ruc. Perhaps with the comhined intellectual resourct·s of our staff and students, a better anS\\cr may be found. Perhaps, even, the Jishono~blc perpetrator him or hcn;elf \\.ill read these worJs and begin to think about what they have done. A new world of flushed toilets and signagc-frcc stalls may wait just arounJ me corner. I dare to dream.

dnnkmg.

Maybe Toronto just needs a picturesque canal running through the nuddle of it.

Mayb<. It needs more green space, more outdoor festivals, more tulips. \1aybe it needs the equtvalcnt of the National Capital CommiSSIOn, making sure that the city's arc1utecture and landscaping create beautiful spaces for its citizens to enjoy.

Oh, my dear Ottawa, though you are far too refmed to blow your own horn and say it yourself, let one of your daughters say it for you: Ottawa is far nicer than Toronto.

****

BY CHRIS ESSERT The splC) foods of the subcontim:nt arc, it seems, more popular than C\er in Toronto the~e days, \\ith reviews of t\\o Indian places (fabla gets thumbs down, I'm still eager to go to Jaipur Grille) in the Globt in the past month, and Xacutti down on CollegL being the hottest place around right now \\ uness also the review of the f lost in the last t~sue of this publication.

Sctnl of a tr"oman anJ Tht Dttil's Advocalt. But lm those of us with lower budgets, your blood" to work for the CL\. this rime, he looks ored as he moves from NataraJ may be the place to go. Although, \fore interesting IS the rclanonsh1p one paternalisoc rant to anomer. J\nd me now that I think about It, it \Vasn't quite as between Clayton and fellow trainee I ,ayla script doesn't help, with its combmation of cheap as I remember. Nevertheless, if you (Bndget Moynahan). It begms with Layla rejected CIA slogans and Dubya-csque want to go out for a good b1te in the ,\nncx, giving Clayton the cold shoulder and pulling rhetoric ("\"X'c believe there's good and ataraj ts a pretty sweet place. gcnenc "we can't get involved" lines. But The apps are fairly t)'Pical for an Indian when Clayton is assigned to spy on her, a evil .... we choose good. We believe there's place: samosas and pakoras are pretty tasty, cat·and-mouse game ensues where each side right and wrong... we choose right."). \lthough the film shows restraint in its but the oruon bhaji aren't the best I've had. suspects the other of betrayal, even while execution-there's nary a fistfight, shoot·out Soups, apparendy a major part of Indian they happily flirt away. It's a relationship that or car chase in the first hour-the plot cwsme, remain for me something I'd like to does the characters justlce, given that they're remains undeveloped. ,\11 that's revealed is \ try one day, but not toda). both trained to view everyone as a potential that there's a bad computer program out I've had, in my several experiences at target.

Natara), probably about ten or twc\vc difFarrell, who got his big break in last sum- there that will somehow rui.n the world. lt's a wonder Clayton even takes the iob, given fercnt dishes. On my \ast ..,-\sit, \\.C tried the mer's Minoriry Report, is being touted as the next ..\ .\ist action star. But his perfor mance Burke'!> two minute run·do\\.n. Mo!>t d t">ap· ) "tar\doon '::>hnmp, w'm cb, at \\'.).9~. \\."Ol'> probably nor m·cc.~.,ar, '\;o. Por ~c.·. ch~ck­ in Th &tn~il doesn 'r le nd much "·eight to poinringl}~ rhe film dm·sn'r e~·cn hor~er en IS the war co go when you re gomg cl1e rumours. .Lun.iring hts facial expressions clcanng !lungs up m the end, mstead making Indian. . . , . to varying degrees of angst over the on- a bee-line for the revelation of who me bad The chmces at NataraJ are many: Kadru and-off-again sexual innuendo Wlth Layla, guy really is.

Granted, if there's on~ actor who ~an Murgh ($8.95) _with potatoes and cashews the pressures of working undercover, and vault a relaove unknown tnto stardom, tt's was so-so, while Murgh Pasanda ($9.50) general self-doubt-Farrell doesn't exude the 1douses Pacmo, and Farrell should count his blesslittle bits in a creamy cashew sauce persona required for leading roles. ings.

But if The &mtil is supposed to be that SUited me just fine.

Pacino's performance IS only slighdy Farrell's vehicle into a Hollywood career, he Sweet, S"-'Cet butter chicken ts, tn my more inspired. As an aged mentor to a better keep an eye out for other offers. optruon, the test of any Indian place, and young protege, he's repnsmg his roles in NataraJ comes up big here: the tandoori fired bird holds its taste well, even though the sauce is very flavourful: the tomato, cream and butter come through strong, for an all-star Indtan treat.

Kclfalotyri cheese, onions, and bell peppers ($12.95 plus tax), wluch stokes me as apro Recendy I've been all about the vegetariall stuffed into a filo-base, my cxohiko was a pos as ordering the catch of the day in the an food, espeoally the Paneer, India's rawgood enough guess. But the mandatory Outback. In case he hadn't figured it out, me milk, mildly flavoured dynamo. Favoured is Greek salad was served, complete with one menu expliady stated that this restaurant IS saag paneer, cheese and spmach, although token olive and excessive lettuce. 1\nd salad "Specializing in Greek Cwsine." Perhaps matta.r paneer (cheese and peas) and paneer aside, this meal is really an all-out carbohy- not surprisingly, they arc not experts at the jalfrezt (tomatoes and cashew~ and cheese) drate attack. The exohiko comes With rice rest. The pasta dish is medtocre at best. The are pretty damn good, too. and potatoes, and with me complimentary microscopic salmon chunks taste like the The food is spicy but delicious Go with leftovers of someone else's salmon steak. the naan rather than the rice, because there's The rose sauce is run-of-the·mill, and the no bread better than that baked by being pasta ts clearly far from fresh-made. The lesstuck to the side of a \IIOod·fired oven. If son? When in Rome, do like the Romans: you want to save on cash (by not tipping or order the pasta and enjoy. When in getting beers) Nararaj will be happy to pack Greece... but we're not m Greece, as the everything up for a delicious takea\\.'ll}' opus. crazed beaver and his awkward ugl} flying soul-mate remmd us.

We leave, and the feeling that Omonia was poor value-for-money ts compounded by the realization that the whole ouong was toasted bread, any calone counter should subjected to a two-way TIC tax. \ t least for ,.

•-w-ave the white flag. Unfortunately this plen- those with a cravmg for Clevcl eaong, tiful helping comes at the plentiful price of Omonia now delivers! So if your Saturday S15.95 plus tax. So although there would rught date with Dennmg 1s JUSt begtnrung to not have been room for wheat, barley and heat up, don't rush things. Stay at home. hops-even had the beaver sold me on a T1us Danforth diner delivers to you. Check brewski-there wouldn't have been much their website, and order on-line at www:omoniarcstaurant.com. Or don't. A room left on the student budget any\\.-ar. virtual meal is enough. ~fy friend decided on salmon penne

I

My big fat Greek neighbour

enables me to do just that. '

Revelatory signs

Indian food: so hot right now Nataraj 39~ Bloor \\'est (~ 16) 928 2925

BY ADRIAN LIU

ac.n~'n"' anu brantlmg t'nc.rn """' vi.o\ation• We )

should rhmk through the implications of cllc: rc:placmg ch1s fr.Jmework with purely umlateral assessments of "emergtng threats" and "JuSt causes." We worked long and hard to overcome the dangers of that very approach.

The Recruit fails to enlist fans

17 ~-----

aradhakant@ogilvyrenaultcom

OGILVY RENAULT Expertise par excellence

Continuing the practices of Mel,_, Demen Ocllvy RaMult s -bey O&ilvy Ranault

ogilvyrenault.com Montrfal • Ottawa • Qu&ec Toronto·~

london (En~)

Through sleight of hand of food, decor, and ~ some Greek restaurants magically transport us from the Danforth to Delphi. But I'm seated across from a fullcolour photo of a gtant seagull swoopmg over the Mediterranean, and with seagulls ranking only one place above pigeons on my list of ugly, annoymg brrds, I can't help but feel less than swept away. Besides, there's a massive beaver hanging on the wall, remind· ing customers of the Greek-Canaclian tea& non of ordering cxooc off the menu and a botdc of Sleeman's for domestic balance.

I pass on the invitation to gualc Guelph's finest, but take the dare of the table-topped plastic propped announcement to "Try our EW menu items.'' I end up ordering the stuffed lamb exohiko. W1th

The microscopic salmon chunks taste like the leftovers of someone else's salmon steak.

·Don't be a .- square. t Read UV ·

UlTRA VIRES

DIVERSIONS

18

Cool gadgets for law students

BY MOTEK SHERMAN Oka}. I 'II be up front at the beginning about this: nobody m:cds gadgets to Jo well at school. J\ pen and some paper and an intrepid heart 6<.'llh, right) should sec you through to the bitter end. But assuming that you agree \\1th the editors of .Hondo 2000 who once dc5cribcd the modern condtnon hr declaring that "the world is ending, but you can buy cool stuff" - then you want gaugers, especially gadgets thar allow you to do things better/faster/more impressively than the poor Luddite w;th the pen and the paper and the intrep1d heart. So, for the tcchnophilcs among us, I've picked some roys that help make life in the trenches a litde easier: Sony CLIE PE G-T 615C with Keyboard Summaries that arc 1) readily accessible, 2) castly edited, and 3) easy co trade for fun and profit arc the bread and butter of life, or at least that pan of life that composes getong your B in PIL and living to tell about lt.

So, any gadget that helps to satisfy those three criteria is a gadget after my hean.

The ob,;ous choice here is a laptop, since you can type your class notes right into the summary, thereby maximizing available gym time. But come on, laptops arc soooo 2001.

This is 2003, baby! And today, the smart money is on PDAs, the smaller the bcner.

The brest colour handhclds can do anything yuur laptop can do: word processing, net surfing, e-mail, even solitaire (arguably the entire point of l1ptops in the classrooms). My personal favc in this category arc all made bv Sony, which has managed to balance size \\;th all the impressive techno whizbangcry that makes PD \ s so damn sex).

The PL(, T61 SC is a good allaround choice. How cool 1s 1t?

On top of the standard Palm OS, It comes pre loaded with Documents-To-Go (for worktng with Word and Excel files) and ;.:,;::o;;=o;;;••l Presenter to Go, which plays PowerPoint slide shows. There's also photo-enhancement and movte playing software!

The only thtng It can't do is play !\1P3s, but if you follow my !-Pod advice (below), you don't need it to.

USB Smart Drives G1vcn the right circumstances, these thtngs arc golden. Let me set the scene.

FROM THE SIDELINES

Your attendance at Trusts has not been stellar, but you happen to know that )'Our frienJ I bmmy Clammy is 1) extremely reliable about att<.nuancc and 2) the proud owner of a laptop. So you approach and ask for the notes. But, oh no - they have no floppy drivel O r - no floppy disk!

Or - they hate you!

Well, I can't help with that last one.

But as for the first two problems, let me mtroducc you co the Smart Drive, a solid state micro hard drive that starts at 32 or, if you prefer, the equivalent of 30 floppy disks.

And it plugs into a USB port And, if you find the right brand - like the Universal Smart Drive (www.univcrsalsmart drive.com) - then it doesn't require you to install any additional driver software on any recent Windows OS. Voila instant notes.

Even if you're not intcre~ted in getting notes off other laptops, the Smart Dnvc is

cherry for getting notes off your laptop and into your desktop. If you're like me, swapping floppv dnvcs in and out of the laptop is a patn, wired networking is a bigger pain, anJ wtrclcss is for the ultra· rich. Enter the Smart Dnvc. Plus, you can detrul your Smart Dnve, sa} with smelly sticker.; or taped ·On mcs· sages, to make it your own. Kcwl!

J\m-

Ap p le 1-Pod Johnny can't live on classes alone, right?

In fact, Johnny is a much better student when he can listen to Slcate,;r-Kmncr or Triumph at will. So Johnny wants instant access tO thousands of MP3s whenever he wants. AnJ the mother of all MP3 players is the 1 Pod, which is sleek, solid state, and steeped in "ooh, can I sec that thtr!g?"-ness.

Granted, carbud headphones suck donkeys. ,\nd ,\pplc gear has a longstanding reputatiOn as temperamentaL But despite these knocks, the l PoJ IS extraordinary, even sh1ppmg with its own proprietary (and, remarkably enough, useful) software. You get automatic author/genre/title categonza cion, a useful thumb-friendly scrolling mechanism, and a good, bright screen. Plus the aforementioned oohs and ahs. The only drawback IS that cvuyone else will want to touch your I-Pod. Wh1ch is not, for many of us, the worst state of affairs imaginable.

BY KErTH BURKHARDT 'Ttl/ Tanzola that I may nttd to miss a game or two. " - Dam n (I), after nmoting his hode4_J shin pad andfinding his kneecap on tbt side of his kg.

Imagine this scenano. You arc a top student in your first and second years at law school. You know every case, every ratio and can even get Professors Trebilcock and Weinrib to agree o n the rights versus advantages debate. But then, o nly d ays before graduation, a federal election results in a complete overh aul of the House of Commons, and the marijuana party takes co ntrol o f the country. Every law is changed ... what was rught IS day, and black is white. If only you were from BC and had anticipated this change of even ts) It will take you years to relearn the law; and even longer to reestablish your rcpu taoon.

Welcome to life on the ll1JUred reserve.

Last week, Darren (name un changed to promote maxunum sympathy) dislocated his kneecap while playing divtslon V hockey.

Technically, it is called a patella clislocation. . . but you get the point. It was a painful, gruesome injury (you don't want to sec the pictures) that threatens hls career wtth the law school's high -flying team (we're 1 and 0 th1s term). The saddest result of the 1111ury IS that unlike the afo rem enoo ned law student who would have numerous scho larships, D arren has never cashed in o n h1s tal-

Tht· following IS a true and accurate account.

One of ll of law studcnrs escaped becoming this year's "scandal" br refusing to accept a pri7c for becoming the n ·cs 2-l billionth riJer. This student was yours truly, Jory Grad (ll). 1 withdrew my entry after finding out that I had won the contest by submitting <ln embellished story.

The famed contest, which ran between October and December 2002, asked TIC passengers to submtt a short story about their most memorable TIC moments. The rules d1d not sttpulatc that the story needed to be true. The TIC received thousands of 75-word essays on their website. The top 24 were chosen as fmalists, each 'vinning an ~lP3 player and a S300 prize package. The best of the best wa.~ awarded the grand prize of a trip for two anywhere in Canada on \'ia Rail, and a free ~lctropass for one year. ~ty winning entry was as follows:

rs

The truth is that I never thought it would win. My friends and I were talking about how ridiculous the ads for this contest were, so we decided to make up equally ncliculous stories. \X!htlc eating lunch in the Rowell Room on a snowy Tuesday, I received a shocking phone call telling me that I was one of the 24 finalist~ for the contest. The call was from a man on the TIC contest committee. He was really high on it, and I just went along \\o;th the whole thing.

But as time and a sleepless night passed, I began to question the situation I put my~clf in, as well as the possible commotion it w·ould cause. ,\ftcr consulting my parents, my friends, and my barber, I decided to lt11'11S a hot AII!JIIt dq in 1977, and nr1 moth- inform the n·c committee of the truth. I

told them that 1 "trught have stretched the truth in some parts." For example, my middle name is obviously not Transit, and I my mom didn't go into labour on the subway.

The fact that I was born in August at 1oronto General Hospital did not sway the contest committee, though. They were not happy. I didn't want to take a prize from them '\\ithout lcning them know that the story was embellished. The TIC took only an hour to deliberate before getting back to me.

I w-as told that they were removing me from the list of fmalists and talcing away my prize to av01d "a media embarrassment for the TIC." 1 was told that there was gomg to be a lot of media coverage. ,\swell, all the stories were in the paper, and they were going to have ads on the sides of buses with my face. ,\t this point, 1 still wasn't sure (although 1 was pretty confident) that my story was going to be the granJ prize \\omncr. \\'hen they took my prize away, they told me that my story was "by far" the best.

The real hint came the day of the grand

prize cen:mony. That morning, before the winner was announced, my sister callcJ me and woke me up. She told me ro turn on Breakfast Tckvis10n on City"IV Til(: chairpcr.;on of the 1TC was on, and when :-.1arilyn Dennis (the show's host) asked her what the best submission was, she rcaJ mine! I was kind of upset because I really could have used that Metropass. "lo\\, everyday when I take my daily ride on our fine city's public vehicle, l pass through the turnstiles, hear my S2.25 jingle into TIC's coffers, and think about what could have been l also r<.-alizc that one lie beat 24 billion honest customers. All this, desp1te the fact that 1 did the right thing by "fessing" up, anJ subsequently got nothing for my troubles ... but hey, everyone knows that nice hruys finish la.'it.

Hev vou. Read uv.

Lawsuit of the month LENCZNER SLAGHT R OYCE

BY KEITH BURKHARDT Jn \pnl 2002, Bnck Brt·wmg Co. decided to stick Its neck out, 1110 not those of Its bottles, \\hen the compan\ rcmtroduced the "stubby" beer bottle to the Ontano market. The nsk pa1d oft: and the smbby brands nO\\ account for approxmutd} 1° o of the market. The owner; of Bn:wcr; Retail (a k.a. Molson, l.abatt and ~Iceman) d1d not hkc hung market share

to Brick and retaliated by thrt-atcning to cut off Hrick's supply of standard si7e bottles. Bnck responded by ft.ltng a $10.5 1rullion lawsuit a{,'lltn~t Brewers Retail and scdwtg an lnJuncnon enjoining Brew·~ rs Retail from cutting off their suppl) of bottles. :\nd here I was thinking thl y could dcade tlus hke men; JUSt throw b:~ck a ft."\\" brt"\\' and duke It out in the parking loti

SMITH GRIFFIN BAIUUSTEIIS

For information about opportunities for a student to learn to be an advocate see our website at www.lsrsg.com or contact Perry Hancock, Student Co-ordinator at (416) 865-3092, e-mail phancock@lmg com SVITI 2600, I )0 ADEI.AIO£Srun W£ST, T~OHTO, 0NTAl!O, CAI,.I>A

Tl!l.UtlONE{416) 16HSOO • fACSIMJU {416) 16S·9010

~tSII

JP5

Magchee. O nly one quarter away from being a top-five NFL draft pick (and a $30 millio n contract, shoe endorsement deal and Chunky Soup commercial), Magchee took a helmet-to-knee hit and tore hls ACL, MCL and NFL dreams to shreds. While the makers of Demerol and Tylenol· 3 will be lining up for sponsorship deals, Magehec's mjury p uts him years away from scetr~g the injuryplagued turf of the NFL. Similar thoughts can be expressed about Brett Lindros. Brett learned to play the hockey from h is o lder brother E n c.

Included in the lessons was Eric's paten ted "skate across the middle with your head down" play. Un fortunately, Brett took Eric's advice and after suffering numerous concussio ns, he quit p laying and works with the NHLPA. I have extra reasons to feel bad about Brett's injuries. In the early 90s, I stocked up on Brett's rookie card, thinking I could sell them after his first Art Ross win and pay my way through law school. Turns out that those cards and my Bre-X shares have made me the loyal Scoti.abank cl.tcnt I am today.

These types of injuries make me think that Lebron James may have caught a lucky break. When he was suspended for the rest of the season, he clinched his future. He no longer needs to worry about the option of college ball and he guarantees his health until the N BA draft, wh ere h e is certain to go # 1. Think about it; the guy drives around m a fully equipped Hummer so a car

arnJcte, pfay1ng

accrdcnr would n o r hurr hm1. Furchcrrnorc,

the game for fun and a free jersey fro m Osiers (Note: D arren 1s no longer allowed to play amateur sports tr1 O hio.) He has left a gaping hole on our D hnc, as no other player can skate backwards well enough to take his position. \Vc can all rationalize injuries suffered by Terrell D avis, Mike Bossr and Bo Jackson by saying that they made mtlhons from their profession before injuries pushcJ them to the sideline. But ho\\ do you explain injuries to athletes (like D arren) who were never given the chance to make th at money?

How can one find reason in the case of Willis "Knee Bends Like an Elbow"

wtth a Wes Un scld Jersey, there isn't a chance he will ever get mugged. 1\s long as he doesn't trip over his dog, break hls hand while answcnng the p hone, or injure his wrist while washing his ride (all athlete injuries from the last year), he will have avoided the biggest drawback of sports, escaping with your life, but not your health.

I guess the world \\o<lS not so kind to Darren. While the rest of us play on, strivmg for that ever elusive champio nship, Darren is head cheerleader. His cartwheels arc shaky and the chants arc a touch off-key, but he is our o nly fan, and for that we arc thankful.

ern.

BYJORY GRAD

r5ollo Voce

The big hurt

\.a\N student e'lentua\\'J remembers morals rr II 'tiS ritltiTg lbr s11/JJJ'f!J qfifr a day of sboppti~g a/ 1/x Eaton Cmlrt. Suddm!J; bt/ll.w1 thr Dtmda.s and Coii(P;t slalionJ, she U'fllt into labo11r. She was l"'lshtd to Toro11to Gmtral I lospital immediatt!J, and tm ho11rs lalfr, I uw bom! ,\[y parmts wen so t.xtitfd about ibt n·bok sit11ahon that they gm~t mt tbt Stllllt ntiddlt llumf as tht 1TC-Transit.

Tbt~nk.s TfC!

19

DIVERSIONS

11 FEBRUARY 2003

llc U. but an arruHcur

Sotto Voce had the strangest dream the other dar in Tax. The Records Office, in the spirit of Valentine's Day, had harnessed the awesome processing power of the coun;c selection computer to launch a dating service for studt:nts and staff.

Sotto Voce eagerly described our perfect match- a cross between Kylie Minogue and Wendy Mesley - but when Celia entered the data, the computer set us up with Stephen Waddams. Jn the end it wasn't so bad. We went to sec G,l"f/ oj N t111 York. He brought flowers.

Tongues were wagging last T\1esday afternoon as a patch o f sidewalk in front of Falconer Hall ·was cordoned off with yellow police tape. Had an impetuous squirrel O\'erwhclmcd a dcfcncelc~s LLM student? Had the law school's iJyll been shattered forever? So tto Voce was relieved to find no chalk outlines. no grizzled detectives. Turns out a branch had snapped tn the high Mnds, narrowly an unsuspecting jogger. rtllistng ,\ ccording to an cye\\o; tncs~. the first o n the scene '"'as Brian Langille, who despite wearing expensive Italian loafers sprinted heroically to the communicatio n s o ffice to repon the incident. The prospect of more arboreal m issiles now reasonably foreseeable, the administra· oon quickly dispatched a grounds crew to sc...-a\ o££ the Uanv,cr zone and a'll<!n a c.o~t­ Jy nqjligenc:e swt. Guess a1l that crap

they teach us in first year is good for something after all.

Inspecting the plans for the RO:-.t rcn · ovauons which are set to begm aggravat· ing law students latt•r this ytm, Sotto Voce got the stro ng impression that all o f Toronto has been hoodwinked into

believing that this !ftlnd projtt will vault the city into the same league as London and New York. The proposal, by C..elcbriry Architect Daniel Libcakind, looks s trikingly like a giant gazebo spooning a junior high school. It is ostentatious, self-indulgent and ugly. It calls to mind Yngwie Malmsteen, a vtrtuoso guitarist in the 1980s whom everyone (aside from connoisseurs of Scandinavian heavy metal ~uch as yours truly) has qwte rightly forgotten about.

Yngv.>le played faster than anyone else on the planet but his songs sucked in a profound way. The point: boldness anJ technical dt:xtcriry arc important, but at the end of the day they arc not enough for truly m eaningful art. Let It be saiJ, though, that Sotto Voce would become the renovation's fiercest champio n if the RO M promised to rcpbcc the horrid Druxy's with, say, a Mongolian barbecue joint.

Ah, mid-Feb ruary. The umc of year when student.~ can send love letters to one another -u>lthout fear o f humiliation or restraining o rdetf>. The time too when Sotto Voce'~ tho ughts turn to matters of the heart. How inspiring it is to be surrounded at school by :.o man~ h appy couples: Ernie and Lorraine Weinrib, ' Dean Ron D a nd Joanne 1\.o~en, Tony Dunan and Co\leen F\ood, Rrlan ) r....n,p.nr and Maria tbe cafeteria lady.. .. 1\nd so, readers, whether }VU ~pend this Friday our on the rmm with your registered domes tic partner or at home watching scrambled porn w1th a king-can of Lakt•r, Sotto Voce wishes you a \'cry h appy Valentine's Day.

Col a tip? Contact ultra.:.im@Jitoronto.ca.

.,

",

~t,· the

·'

t?

bottom line @ www.ultrovires.c~ .

-

ULTRA VIRES

DIVERSIONS

20

Ultra News: Not-So-Real News From Around the Law School Archangel arrives On Friday, Faculty Council elevated Stephen Bro\lo•n to the angelic kingdom and placed ns complete faith in hi~ ability to save the )a...,· school's finanoal atd program.

Brown 1~ the d1n:ctor of tlw financial aid progmm at J·ordham University's Ia\\ school, and has assisted sewral mher Amcncan lau school~ to reform thetr respccuw programs. lie becomes the ninth archangel, JOIIllllg Mtchad. Raphael, Galmd, l ncl, Raziel, /..adkicl, Zcphron, and Lot~.

"In our rune of need, ue tum to You, o' m}Sttc cherub from the ~outh," exhorted Dean Ron Damcls. "Exorcise our Scotiabank demon, soothe .\laddin's burden, and guide us down the S22,000 path of righu:ousncss."

Cornmenrnf ,\n:hangcl Brown on the news of his nscension: "This sure bears that honorary doctorate that I'm getting from the Umverstty of Southeastern tltah."

Robin Rix

Pakistan-style election woos voters

Harvard Mouse won't stop telling everyone he went to Harvard

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for them. "h n:allr gets w me whcn they reminisce about tht• mild winters, the ocean bn.:czes, and th<>Sl' pe~ky little Gulf Islands," remarked Premtcr Ernie Eves. "But what rl~tlly bugs me IS when they talk about \ 'llncoun:r being the ctty where you can ski 111 the morning and then swim in the aftcrnoon. Lih· anyone ever docs that." \~ide from co·operating wtth the B.C. governrm·nt to dday tht• processtng of srudcnt loans and to den} the rccr1pt of l\ltllmmum Scholarships ro any student in a second entry professional program, the Ontario Provincial Police will subject all B.C. students ro invasive full-body cavity searches on d1e suspicion of marijuana trafficktng. · Ro/tm /{ix

Randell sells e-mail addresses to penis, breastenlargement company . •I 'I1angTM . a ptoneenng .

• manu f:acturcr o f 131g and breast enlargers, paid penis Merril Randell over $500,000 to smuggle out ,1 copy of the stalker's guide.

Ron Jcretn), a Big Thang rcpresentauve and a Freudtan explaim·d, "Law school attracts competittH', type \ personalities ... and that b l'Xactly the marker we hope 11 > target." lie continued, "a lor of the compcmion over grades may m ask ferhngs of inadeyuacy in other areas. \\'e hope to exploit that. " ,\ contntc Randell said, "1 don't know what came ovcr me. I thtnk it may have been gru:d though."

poltcy. "\'<Hers' lists really ~low down the line ... ami that turns prospccuve voters right off. I don't know why so many bureaucracies cling to silly formalttics," said a Dl ~" representative. "\X'l"re proud to report that the rev·amped election policies yielded a record high 120% voter turnout."

Bowing to relentk:ss pressure from the firstyear class, professors Colleen Flood and Trudo l.emmens have agreed to switch the focus of rhis week's bndge from the Human Genome Project to the Fox reality-TV shou;

Briefly Noted

- Ust1 Mm11k

jot Millionam.

Students look forward to Law Ball by d umpmg non law girl friends, boyfriends

B.C. students shafted

The move b) Downtown Legal Sen,ccs (DIA'\) to Pakistan-sq·lc elections for its Citing the need to reduce the dispropor2003 t.'Xecum·e was heralded as "a triumph tionate number of the law school's srudents for democracy at the law school." DlA'\ who come from British Columbia, the cn·lhts Genera\ \>ervez ;\\usharraf, ( )ntano government has inttiated a series of \>,lkistan's \lfCSlUCnt., for mspiring f>CVt:ra\ measures to make the prospect of spending \\L'W \n\nativc$, most notab\y the "no vo1c r~·

Bridge Week revamped

Inswad of delivenng h1s scheduled lecture on rt·cent developments in inteUectual property jurisprudence, Jonathan Putnam ...,;n spl-ak on "The Zora Sarah Dilemma: An Economic Approach."

Tomorro\\· ;\1adam Jusoce Rosalie Abella will k-ad a panel discussion, "\X'har's the dl-al wtth the butler's Australian accent!'"

·Usa ,\li1111k

I :irst·year fin~lly meets her locker buddy

llomesick limy Duggan sees Kangaroo

jack for third ume Third year's mom sull hoping he becomes a doctor · -.