SCREAMING HEADLINE: This year’s Spring Fever Artist is...
The University Ruse Wishing you a ‘Happy April Fools’!’ since 1921
We have a website
Vol. XOXO No. 42
Dogz
Ruff! Meow!
VS.
Hello!!
CATz
Sup? Yoohoo!
>>SPORTS
Cubs win World Series University community now concerned about 2012 apocalypse By BB OYD Thinks he is all that
In an event which shocked even the most staunch baseball analysts, the Chicago Cubs have been tabbed as the preseason favorites to win the 2011 World Series. Behind the bats of feared sluggers Koyie Hill and Darwin Barney, the team looks to generate enough offense to contend. Coupled with a feared pitching rotation headed by the totally not insane Carlos Zambrano, the organization finally has the pieces to end a 103-year drought. Unfortunately, for the rest of society, the prediction could spell disaster, acting as a harbinger for another even more ludicrous prediction: The apocalypse predicted by the Mayan long-count calendar. Although the Mayans predicted the world to end in 2012, experts on the subject agree that the Cubs claiming the 2011 World Series trophy would be enough to expedite the process. “Yes, all signs point to the apocalypse commencing in 2012, but the consensus in the academic community seems to be that the Cubs winning the Series would take precedence over some stupid calendar,” renowned history scholar Jimmy Bob Jones, PhD., said. When asked about the implications of their beloved Cubbies ending the existence
Top o’ the mornin’!
of humanity as we know it, Cubs fans were largely indifferent. “Apocalypse? Who gives a crap? CUBBIES WORLD SERIES BABY! NORTH SIDE FOR LIFE!!!!!!” Chase Miller, an interior designer from Chicago, said. The Cubs players and staff are confident that, despite the predictions offered by renowned experts, that there is absolutely zero chance in hell that they win the World Series. “Listen, we have been screwing this up for over a century. We have had payrolls twice that of previous champions, two game advantages in playoff series and Markfreaking-Grace. We still could not finish the job. There is no way we can be responsible for this,” rarely injured runproducing-machine Alfonso Soriano said through a translator. “Right? Guys? Right? Oh God.” Chicago Cubs general manager Jim Hendry expressed similar sentiments regarding the experts’ predictions. “I ensure that through my ineptitude, we will not bring about the apocalypse as described in the Book of Revelation. Do you really think a higher power would allow a man who signed Milton Bradley to a multi-year, THIS JUMPS
KT Teller of Lies
Sophomores Hilary Korabik, Colleen Logue, Hannah Dussold and Lizzie Bartek stumble upon books in the library, a concept that left them in complete awe.
Student finds book in library Lucky Charms cereal has gone missing Tress’s discovery. “We worry about Matt sometimes,” Day said. “Last When sophomore Matt week he chased a squirrel Tress stumbled into the li- around a trash can for two brary last week, the last thing hours. We’ve been trying to he expected to find there was get him help, but now that he thinks he discovered a leprea book. “A book? Nah, man, I chaun colony. Well, there’s not much hope chased this left…” leprechaun T r e s s in there,” said he plans T r e s s to be in said. “I rethe library ally wanted some Lucky A book? Nah, man, more often now that Charms.” L u c k y I chased this lepre- he knows C h a r m s chaun in there. I real- where the or not, ly wanted some Lucky books are. “ Ye a h Tress was man, now s h o c k e d Charms. that I found and awed them, I when he - Matt Tress might as looked up to well use find himself them. It’s surrounded not like the library’s going by shelf upon shelf of books. “Are you kidding?” Dean of anywhere anytime soon… Students Scooter Smite said. wait, what do you mean they’re “No, really, you’ve got to be renovating? WHAT ABOUT kidding me right now. It’s a THE LEPRECHAUNS!?!” In an unrelated story, library. What did that [lovely intelligent student] expect to Griesedieck dining hall reports that their entire stock find in there?” Tress was thrilled with his of Lucky Charms cereal has discovery, however, stating he gone missing. An anonymous staff member blames a horde could use it to his advantage. “Leprechauns love books,” of little green men. Director of Public Safety Tress said. “If there’s one book in here, there’s bound to be and Services, Cortland Rovmore. And that means there’s ing, thinks the most logical probably a whole leprechaun explanation at this time is aliens. colony in the library!” “Aliens love Lucky Sonny Day, a close friend of Tress, was no less sur- Charms,” Roving said. “Provprised when he heard about en fact.” By KROSTEN PIANO That little girl
“
”
Friday, April 1, 2011 WhaDDup?
Hey You! YO!
Turn the page. Do it. You know you want to.
Hey Girl Heyyyyy!
PICK UP THE PAPER RIGHT NOW! C’MON!
‘Building Bridges’ party begins Building Bridge
Shahahahaha/ Likes to Click Button to Take Photos
Members of Building Bridges begin building bridges. When asked how students might cope with the construction, incoming SGA president Ryan Matt stressed the importance of not panicking and remembering to bring your towel.
Ryan Matt, VPs tackle overpass, music video with famous St. Louis rapper By AIR-RI-KA COBBLER Walks on water, types quickly
Following their sweeping victory in February’s Student Government Association elections, members of the Building Bridges ticket are ready to put their hard hats to the test and tackle their first task: The rebuilding of the Grand viaduct between Chouteau Avenue and Interstate 64. “We didn’t buy all of these hard hats for nothing,” Ryan Matt, incoming SGA president, said. “We told people we wanted to build bridges, so why not rebuild an actual bridge? It can’t be that difficult.” Building Bridges held an event on March 14 to mark the official closing of the Grand Bridge. The party included a balloon drop at 3 a.m. and an appearance by popular St. Louis rap artist Nelly, who collaborated with Building Bridges on his new song, “We’re on a Bridge, but Not Really Because It’s Closed.” Time spent filming a music video with Nelly caused Building Bridges to delay the closing of the Grand Bridge for several months. “That’s why we had to keep changing the date of the closing, over and over and over again,” St. Louis City Streets Director Trett Waelterdude said.
Matt said his team is currently constructing models of the new bridge out of LEGOs and an Etch-a-Sketch. “We’ve tossed around a lot of ideas for how to make the bridge better,” Matt said. “Some of our top ideas right now are the addition of a giant Billiken statue that could be seen from downtown and a moving sidewalk, like they have in airports.” The construction project will take 1,459,231,875,348 man hours, all of which will be completed by the Building Bridges ticket and that guy who was featured in their campaign videos. “It’s going to be a long process, but we’re going to have fun with it,” T-Swag, the incoming vice president for student organizations, said. Building Bridges plans to reopen the Grand Bridge partially to traffic in seven years. While construction is underway, Building Bridges is working to secure funding for alternate modes of student transportation. Incoming financial vice president Jackson Ferpas said that every Saint Louis University student will be provided with a motorized scooter to travel between campuses. The basketball team will be able to trade in their current scooters for hovercrafts designed
OMG. We’re Building a Bridge! -Bridge to reopen in 7 years -Project will take 1,459,231,875,348 man hours -All students to receive motorized scooters to travel between campuses -Basketball team will trade scooters for hovercrafts -Closing party on March 14 included a balloon drop and an appearance from Nelly -Proposed plans include a giant Billiken statue and a moving sidewalk by students in the Parks College of Engineering, Aviation and Technology. Though the reopening of the bridge is in the distant future, one member of the Building Bridges ticket already has plans for how to christen the new bridge. “I don’t know about everyone else, but I plan on dropping it like it’s even hotter when the bridge reopens,” Sean Hustler, incoming vice president for internal affairs, said.
The members of the Building Bridges ticket will no longer be SLU students in seven years, but they are dedicated to the project and will just pass off whatever they do not finish to the next SGA executive board. “Whoever plans on running for SGA for the next few years should expect the Grand Bridge to be one of their platform points,” Matt said. “We can’t wait to pass on our hard hats to the next great group of bridge-builders.”
Dubourg Hall’s attic, remains of lost ark By Dr. DRE Cat lady
Admissions counselor Bephen Starnes said he was startled when he arrived at DuBourg Hall early Monday morning to discover a trail of hay leading from Grand Boulevard through the hallways of the building. As he approached his office, Starnes said he heard animal noises coming from the fourth floor. “I’ve been in this building every day for the past year,” Starnes said of DuBourg Hall. “Never before have I heard elephants and geese from my office.” Sarnes immediately contacted Facilities Management, who then promptly inspected the building for exotic animals. Bathleen Krady, Vice President of Facilities Management, said she was surprised to find not only elephants and geese, but giraffes, aardvarks, llamas and tigers, to name a few, in the Sinquefield Stateroom on DuBourg’s fourth
floor, two of each, side by side. “We’ve never seen anything like it before, and we have no idea how long the animals have been hiding up there or where they came from,” Krady said. The mysterious animals seemed to have landed in the building by boat, as the roof of the Sinquefield Stateroom has been replaced by a large wooden vaulted structure.
The origin of the boat is under debate by the administration. “I have reason to believe that the large boat may actually be Noah’s Ark,” Whon Jaide, the University archivist, said. “Carbon dating of the solid wood craftsmanship shows that the boat may be around 5,000 years old, the precise time that Noah set sail in the Old Testament, so the animals are quite elderly.” While animals are now
running rampant two-by-two down West Pine, students are concerned for their safety. A stampede of cattle, wildebeasts, unicorns and rhinoceroses trampled through campus, demolishing the Clock Tower and several fountains. The Saint Louis Zoo and the Department of Animal Protection have been called in to round up the animals, but some students have been seen hoarding them as pets in dorm rooms.
I fool you
KT Ben
The remains of Noah’s ancient vessel for creatures reworked to create the Sinquefield Stateroom in DuBourg Hall.
Recycle? Who does that? Who reads this line next to the recycling sign anyway?
April Fools’ Edition
1.75
WE HAVE A WEBSIGHT
Friday, April 1, 2011
Let Us Introduce You
Hermaphrodite Statue Unsure of which pronoun to use By PRI PRI THE PIRATE Has opinions
“I try to look as awkward as possible,” Hermaphrodite Statue, who goes by Hermy, said. Success. He is more awkward than the vaguely Billiken-shaped mass of twigs in front of the Busch Student Center, affectionately known as the Billiken Bush. “I’m proud of my awkwardness. I’ve come to accept it. It’s really been a story of growth and contortion for me these last 50 years. And I feel great! It’s the Pilates.” He had not always been the Mecca for nest-building birds. She reflects fondly on his early days at Saint Louis University when she was an aesthetic masterpiece. “My official posting was in the center of the Grand crosswalk. Those were the glory days…I used to have a head and a stomach,” she said, sighing wistfully. A tragic accident four score and seven years ago still brings tears to his invisible eyes, located in the gaping hole where her face should be. A seven car Grand pile up injured him for life, resulting in her current awkward position, which looks like a cross between a baseball pitch and a suggestive yoga pose. Reports from somewhere or other said that there were five squirrels who went nuts fighting over a pair of golf cart keys and an Au Bon Pain bagel right in the middle of Grand, which caused the tragic accident. Hermy was in the middle of the mash-up. “I was reposted next to Father Blondie’s house immediately afterwards. And I had to donate my face and abs to Doug, the statue in front of the Bauman-Eberhardt Center. Yeah, I used to look THAT good.” Despite his current lack of organs, she still has had the guts to fend off the SLU squirrels that routinely try to jump
Monday, June 7
THE SLU SCOOP
Saturday, June 19
Arts expert
That one movie directed by that one director is a story of boy meets girl. This one boy seems to be perpetually unlucky; he looses that one job, that one girlfriend of his dumps him and that one friend is always spending time with his new wife. He decides to go on a journey of self-discovery to this one place. However, his luck seems to turn around when he meets
3:17 p.m. - CAH-CLONGGGG In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate yet equally important groups: the police who investigate crime and the district attorneys who prosecute the offenders. These are their stories.
Special guest editor Wolfgang Issac Berman
Some guy sent this to us from his basement
through his head. “It’s a matter of intimidation. When staring them down didn’t work, I decided to awkward them out,” she said with a smile. Not everyone finds Hermy awkward, however. There is a zany charm that she brings to campus that few other statues have. Some students have also described Hermy’s condition as a fitting modernist representation of the greater existential sense of disillusionment and artistic mumbo-jumbo that followed some academic time-period, and the displaying of visceral body parts signified…something else nerdy. Others relate to Hermy in simpler ways. “It adds true aesthetic appeal to my mansion,” Father Blondie said. Hermy appreciates all the
love and attention she receives. “It’s really helped to fill the void in my stomach.” He revealed his deeper side with matters of love. She admits to having a crush on the suggestive-looking couple stationed next to Griesedieck Hall. When pressed to answer which specific individual in the statue she had a crush on, she answered with a blush. “Both. I identify as transpan-confused-why-is-mything-on-my-hip?!-sexual, which would make us all perfect for each other!” She is happily talking to the couple via pigeon-mail. Hermy proves to be an important part of life at SLU, and we will always look upon his awkwardness with an endearing eye and warmth in our hearts enough to fill all of her empty spaces.
this one girl. She is bold and adventurous and forces him to push the boundaries of the safe and boring life he has led. After spending a week with her in that one place, he begins to think she is the one. But this love is challenged when this ex-boyfriend of hers shows up and she falls for his fake apologies. Heartbroken, that one boy returns home, unsure of what his next move will be. He still has no job, no girlfriend and his friend is still married. He knows no more about himself
than when he started that whole journey of self-discovery. That one boy falls into a deep depression and begins a downward spiral of drinking alone every night in some bar. But then, this one night he runs into that one girl again. It would seem that fate has brought them together again. She professes her deep and undying love or something like that. Then they kiss and some cheesy love song plays in the background, and they live happily ever after of some stuff.
Oh, and I suppose I need to point out the EXACT POINT where the story restarts, too?! Continued from Page Whatever
multi-million dollar contract decide the fate of humanity? Absolutely not,” Hendry said. Former flamethrower Kerry Wood was reached for comment, but upon hearing the news, his right arm immediately fell off. Baseball commissioner
Monday, June 23
5:27 p.m. - SOUFFLE PBSSS responded to a call stating that three students had been consumed by a ten-foot-wide soufflé. The incident remains unexplained.
Insert generic movie review headline By JONES
03:00 a.m. - TOLD YOU SO Those people who live above me perished horribly. One victim fell face-first into an inferno, another directly into the jaws of Cereberus, guard dog of Hades. The other two met fates too terrible to describe.
Bud Selig attempted to quell the fears of world leaders this past week by offering this statement. “Major League Baseball, throughout its long, illustrious history, has implemented safeguards against such a tragedy occurring. We were at
one point seriously considering having opposing pitchers throw underhand to the Cubs hitters in the interest of fairness, but we decided against it,” Selig said. “The league understands that if these clowns ever win it all, the world is totally
“This is a leading question....” “I feel pretty. Oh so pretty. I feel pretty and witty and... what was the question? ” Lilly Loves The Sun...And Herself
“Yo, yo. Ma! I see you, boo. I see you! You, in those yoga pants, get at me. ”
JoJo A Like a Little post?
The PBSSS SLU Scoop brought to you by WGBH Boston and viewers like you. Thank you.
SGA sparks meaningful discussion By NOSE GOES Creepy Person in the Back
After a five hour long debate, the Student Government Association accomplished the following:
Campus newspaper acquires its 11th reader Newspapers across the nation hopeful about future By JMoney That one guy
life because I don’t like frizzy hair; that is just sick nasty.” Last year, The URuse reached its 10th reader, and many see this addition as a major milestone for newspapers across the nation.
A loud screech, sort of like a cheer, echoed in the halls outside of Suite 354 (otherwise known as the “the Newsroom”) in the Billiken Busch Center as members of The University Ruse staff heard they had acquired another reader from last year, giving them a total of 11. I don’t understand “OMG, I cannot believe why those students inthis is happening right now,” Chief-in-Editor JMon- sist on wasting that ey said. “This puts us over much paper ever y 10, and this just makes us week; I mean what did such a big deal.” The 11th reader has been trees ever do to them? identified as junior Erin (I forgot to write down her last -Patricia Wacko name). Erin said she picked up the paper to use as an umbrella to shield her from the rain during a thunderstorm “I think this is a huge sucon March 20. cess, and next year it is en“I was weak, and I needed tirely possible that the paper something to protect my rath- may even reach 12 readers,” er gorgeous hair from the icky World’s-most-nearly-perfectrain,” Erin said. “I never knew professor said. “Erin has the newspaper could be so shown us that newspapers do useful, and it really saved my have a place in the 21st cen-
“
”
tury, and they can really be a benefit to our sociey.” Some students however, strongly disagree with the purpose of newspapers and the paper that they use. “I don’t understand why those students insist on wasting that much paper every week; I mean, what did trees ever do to them?” sophomore in the Environmental Tree Hugging program Patricia Wacko said. With a history spanning 90 years, The URuse has been able to provide tens and tens of students with light bathroom reading, packing paper and the ability to cover up windows for secret meetings. “The URuse has many purposes. I often go into the Business School bathroom on the first floor with the paper, and it helps me relax with some light reading,” freshman Paul Bigdealington said. “Anyone can use a newspaper, and let’s be honest, you can’t bring your laptop in the bathroom with you to read. I mean, really who does that?”
Something, something, something, Dark Side, something, something,
“I feel naked. Stop looking at me when you walk by. ”
Professor Brown Needs Some Leaves
“I like the sun. The sun makes me happy. La, la, la. ”
April Looks Pretty In Pink
something complete By ROCKSTAR Freshman
On Wednesday, Feb. 32, 2011, DPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS reported a hit-and-run accident on Grand Boulevard between Lindell and that other street. Thirty-seven-year old Bart McJurgenson was attempting to drive to Shady Shell to purchase jelly beans and a diet coke at approximately 12:14 p.m. Two minutes later, his car was suddenly struck by a SLU student, presumably running to see if actual dolphins had been added to the dolphin pond. Usually, a total of three people cross the Grand crosswalk daily making it a perfect place to drive with ease. Everyone follows the traffic signals, even if no cars are in sight. DPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS officers were in fact surprised to here of such an incident. Sophomore Betsy Knownothing saw the entire accident occur on her way to History of Shopping 100. “Like, OMG, I don’t know, like it was, like, crazy! I’ve never, like, seen anything like this like before.” And it is 3:30 a.m., and I am not going to finish this...
And so ends our fake articles—thanks for indulging us, and on to the real newspaper!
The University News A Student Voice of Saint Louis University Since 1921
unewsonline.com
Vol. XC No. 23
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Who Will be next? Chingy 2008
Lifehouse 2009
Ben Folds 2010
SLU responds to Japan’s disaster
San Diego Bound SLU Rugby begins national title quest>> SPORTS
See who will perform at this year’s Spring Fever concert >> ARTS
Beyond Face Value
Alum, current students help Engineering, Aviation and Technology in 2002, said that the country as a whole is in When a 9.0 magnitude good shape, but frequent earthquake and a subsequent aftershocks and the threat tsunami hit the east coast of of radiation from nuclear Japan on March 11, Saint Louis reactors is a concern for the University graduate Charles country. Robert Herrmann, Chair “Gyro” Morris, a captain in of Natural the U.S. Air Sciences Force, said in the he made sure Depar tment he was in the of Earth and first alert crew to help The quicker you Atmospheric Sciences, in the relief effort. can estimate the c o n d u c t s research Morris the said he damage, the faster at w a t c h e d you can focus on University’s Ear thquake f o o t a g e C e n t e r from the saving lives. regarding ear thquake the impact live on -Robert Herrmann of quakes to his office determine computer. t h e “I watched Sendai airport get swallowed responding plans of action by the tsunami,” Morris said. and safety in affected areas. “The quicker you can “It was unreal.” With a population of about estimate the damage, the 127.51 million, according to faster you can focus on saving the last census in 2009, the lives,” Herrmann said. Herrmann said that it disaster left 16,290 people missing and 11,362 people may take up to five years for dead. More than 190,000 the nation to be restored, people have relocated to while some areas may never temporary shelters. The recover. “Japan has recognized Japanese government estimates that the damage that earthquakes are a major threat to their society will exceed $300 billion. “A lot of people died, and we and have invested a lot into the threat,” need to stand by our Japanese monitoring allies when our help is needed Herrmann said. “They also know that earthquakes can most,” Morris said. Morris, who graduated from the Parks College of See “Japan” on Page 3 By ANDREA ROYALS Managing Editor
“
”
Photo illustration by: Shah (Yuqing Xia) / Associate Photo Editor
Survey reveals class consciousness By SEAN WORLEY News Editor
Ryan Giacomino / Photographer
Notable Saint Louis University alumnus, John Cook, speaks about his experiences, specifically his philanthropic efforts.
School of Business welcomes namesake By KRISTEN MIANO News Editor
The John Cook School of Business gave students an opportunity this past Monday, March 28, to finally put a face to a name they know so well: John Cook. The famous Saint Louis University donor and member of the board of trustees gave a speech to an audience of about 130 students, faculty and staff, telling stories of his business and philanthropic work and giving some sage advice. “It’s good to have skills, but it’s also good to have luck,” Cook said. Cook is a SLU graduate and one of the first in his family to go to a university. He told the story of his first taste of accounting, which occurred during a job he had to pay for college. “I happened to get interested one day in this parking garage,” Cook said. “No one monitored it, so I took a day, and I audited.” Cook discovered that the profits from the parking garage that day were close to $150 dollars short. He began to monitor the garage more closely and continued to notice there was missing money. “And then, every now and then, we wouldn’t be short,” Cook said. “That was because there were days when one cashier didn’t work. At any rate, I ended up discovering
what was the largest fraud in the company’s history. This woman had been basically ripping off the company for 30 years.” When Cook graduated, he was offered a job with that company. He moved up through the ranks very quickly, attributing his success more to his administrative skills than his accounting abilities. “In life, make sure you always know what you’re not good at, and compliment yourself with those skills you have,” Cook said. His career really took off when he got involved with a then-fledgling company known as Wal-Mart and was able to work with it as it grew See “Cook” on Page 3
When students are asked to list the brand names of clothing lines, shoes and other accessories that can be commonly found on the campus of Saint Louis University, Ralph Lauren, Abercrombie, The North Face, Vera Bradley, Sperry and Ugg are common names cited. The presence of these brands can be correlated to a misperception of the reality, the reality of socio-economic diversity. Saint Louis University for Undergraduate SocioEconomic Diversity (SLU/FUSED) presented the student body with a survey focused on the perception of the social class an average SLU student would be considered and how respondents felt they compared. “I think the data speaks for itself, and there is a big difference,” Kripa Sreepada, chair of SLU/FUSED, said. “The perception is higher than the reality.” Of the 667 respondents, 64.92 percent said the average SLU student would be considered upper-middle class, and only 26.99 percent said middle class. When asked what they would consider themselves, only 36.43 responded with upper-middle class and 38.53 percent reported middle class. With the misperception now brought to light, the question and challenge that faces SLU/FUSED is how to raise and promote awareness on campus. In attempts to promote awareness of socio-economic
4.65% Upper class
6.75% 36.43%
Upper-middle class
64.92% 38.53%
Middle class
26.99% 13.19%
Lower-middle class
1.2% Working class
0.15%
SLU/FUSED Socio-economic Diversity Survey 667 Respondents = Self-perceived social class
7.2% The University News prints on partially recycled paper.
See “Class” on Page 3
Approximate average family income for all students: $77,000 80 percent of undergraduate students receive financial aid from SLU 60 percent of all undergraduate students receive financial aid from the Government 3,200 students are eligible for Federal Work Study; 1,600 accept Federal Work Study
To the rescue
Read and Recycle
diversity, one thing SLU/FUSED is working on is receiving money from a Bright Ideas Grant. With the requested grant of $2,000, SLU/FUSED would utilize the funds to help those students in financial situations that prevent them from participating in extracurricular activities because of dues and fees. The organization, now a Student Government Association committee, is planning on exploring potential scholarships for students in the Doisy College of Health Sciences, specifically those in the undergraduategraduate hybrid programs. Sreepada said there are no scholarships as of now for those students who are required to stay over the summer break and take classes. While there are currently no scholarships for summer classes and the students who have to take them, 80 percent of undergraduates are using SLU financial assistance. The department of Student Financial Services sees first-hand the financial aspect of socio-economic diversity. Cari Wickliffe, the assistant vice president and director of Student Financial Services, said that socio-economic
= Perceived social class of average SLU student
News
2
unewsonline.com
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Let Us Introduce You
Thomas Rowland
Modern Renaissance man shreds with swords, Flamenco guitar By ALEX FERARRA Contributor
Some recognize him as an English teacher. Some recognize him as a Spanish teacher. And some may have spotted him cruising around Saint Louis University’s campus on his Honda Rebel motorcycle. But do not let the name “rebel” fool you; it is a misnomer in the case of Thomas Rowland’s chivalrous cause. Rowland is a graduate student studying for his doctorate degree in medieval literature. Born in Kansas City, Mo., Rowland attended a public high school where his interest in academia was piqued. He went on to study in History, Spanish and Theology at Southwest Baptist University while maintaining an interest in theater. “It was my position in the theater department as a technical director, in charge of lights, sound and carpentry, that first stirred my interest in several personal hobbies,” Rowland said. He became a man of trade. “I am a modern, model pioneer, who lives by the aphorism, ‘if you need it, make it.’” Rowland excels in several crafts, most notably sewing, metalworking, carpentry and leather working. He fashioned a saddle for his motorcycle and furnished his apartment, constructing his own tables, shelves and chairs. After his time at Southwest Baptist, Rowland followed his passions to the University of Chicago to study medieval manuscripts and history. There, he earned his master’s degree and decided to finish his education at SLU. His interest in medieval literature was inspired by works such as “Don Quixote” and “The Book of Chivalry,” but he admitted his greatest inspiration was not classic literature, but a movie. “Believe it or not, the most inspirational piece I have ever encountered was the movie ‘The Princess Bride.’” “The Princess Bride” was responsible for spurring Rowland’s fascination with swordplay. He has studied for
THE SLU SCOOP All Information Provided by Department of Public Safety and Security Services
Monday, March 21
7:52 a.m. - ROBBERY 2nd DEGREE A student reports that he was approached by two males wearing sweatshirts. One suspect said, “If you know what’s good for you, you’ll give us all your money.” The victim opened his wallet and dropped $110.00 on the ground and ran.
Tuesday, March 22
6:10 p.m. - ARMED ROBBERY An officer witnessed a student walking across the driveway of the Hotel Ignacio when a suspect approached the student. The suspect robbed the student at gunpoint and forcefully removed his backpack then sped away in a vehicle.
Wednesday, March 23
4:33 p.m. - POWER OUTAGE A power outage effected north campus. Officers responded and checked of all buildings. Command staff ordered an evacuation and lockdown. Power restored at 7:54.
Thursday, March 24
10:00 p.m. - LOST PROPERTY A DPSSS officer while on patrol of the beat one area misplaced the beat one key ring. Attempts to locate the missing key ring is ongoing.
Be a Responsible Billiken STOP. CALL. REPORT. 314-977-3000 witness.slu.edu dps.slu.edu
SGA allocates Rugby 5K in funding Kati Cundari / Associate Photo Editor
several years in the style of Italian sword fighting, L’Arte dell’Armizare, created by Fiore dei Liberi in 1410. In further pursuit of this hobby, Rowland has familiarized himself with Liberi’s manuscripts, known as the “Flower of Battle.” “He documents every move with purpose,” Rowland said. “It’s considered the most extensive martial arts manual from the medieval period.” Rowland’s love for swordplay launched him into a community that both lives and dies by the sword – metaphorically speaking. Several times a year, Rowland heads up to Madison, Wis., to learn from his maestro, Bob. In return, Bob has traveled to SLU to give presentations to the SLU swordplay club. Yes that is correct. Rowland has created a medieval sword club on SLU’s campus
in the hopes of instructing others in the way of the blade. Students start with bamboo swords before using “wasters,” a non-edged aluminum sword, to avoid any potentially fatal beginner mishaps. Some of Rowland’s other hobbies include playing video games, paintball and studying as a Flamenco Guitarist. Although he claims to still be a novice with the instrument, he has played this style of Spanish classical guitar for five years for performance dancers at numerous venues. Rowland still finds himself uncertain of what the future may hold for him. It is, however, his philosophy to seek adventure wherever the road takes him. No matter where he may find himself, Rowland has pledged to “always take the martial art of sword fighting and craftsmanship with me.”
By KRISTEN MIANO News Editor
This week’s meeting of the Student Government Association was all about change and precedent. Dean of Students Scott Smith and Director of Student Support and Parent Services Donna Bess Meyers gave a presentation regarding changes to the structure of the Student Involvement Center. According to Smith, the structure created a hierarchy that kept departments from working with the administrators they need to work closely with. In the new structure, Smith said communication will flow more efficiently, thereby keeping the interests of students as the motivating factor. “Decisions have to be about students, not about the staff,” Smith said. “If I’m making decisions thinking my constitutions are the staff, I have failed you already.”
The senate then moved into a discussion of spot funding for Club Rugby, who hopes to attend a tournament in two weeks. They asked for an allocation of $5380 to pay for hotels and vans, but did not ask for money for plane tickets, as they had already started to purchase them with alumni funding in hopes of getting them at a reduced rate. Questions were raised about funding for vans, as funding guidelines does not allow allocating money for this. Fusz Hall Senator Caroline Rutledge proposed an amendment that would allocate $4500 towards airline costs instead so that senate could still support the team. “In funding history, has senate ever tried to fund something that was not requested?” School of Public Health Senator Matt Ryan asked. First-year Senator Joe Woster stated that he was uncomfortable with such an
amendment due to the burden it would place on the Student Activity Fee. Black Student Alliance Senator Kale Kponee encouraged Senate to be concrete in their decisions. “We can’t keep flip flopping. One minute were doing this with spot funding, next minute we’re doing that,” Kponee said. “Senate just needs to stop talking about precedent. We look like a senate that can’t make up its mind.” The amendment did not pass, but a new amendment was proposed to lower the amount to $2225 for plane tickets in lieu of funding for vans. This amendment passed, as did the spot-funding bill for the Club Rugby team, allocating them $5130. Two new student organizations, Acts64, a Christian ministry group, and Engineering World Health, a group that works on engineering projects with third-world countries, both received chartering.
What are you waiting for?
Preorder your summer & fall textbooks online now---use your SLU account to pay and pick up the books before classes start!
slu.bncollege.com Saint Louis University Bookstore in the BSC 314/531-7925 LUMI_3428_StadiumSportsBar_UN_AD.indd 1
3/11/11 11:20:56 AM
unewsonline.com
News
Editorial board re-elects Editor-in-Chief Jonathan Ernst to lead The University News for 2011-2012 academic year By PATRICIA SCHAFER Contributer
The University News Editorial Board re-elected Jonathan Ernst as the 2011-2012 Editorin-Chief on March 7, and according to the newspaper’s production coor dinator Jason Young, they chose Ernst the perfect person for the job. “Jonathan has one of the highest journalism IQs of any student I’ve ever worked with. He understands the value of a community newspaper and sees the larger audience of alumni, students, staff and faculty to reach out to,” Young said. Ernst has had several years to improve these skills. Working at his newspaper in high
school, he rose through the ranks from staff writer to editor-in-chief in his senior year. After arriving at Saint Louis University, he worked as assistant copy editor and news editor before being elected Editor-in-Chief last year. Returning in the same position, Ernst becomes one of only five people in the last 32 years to repeat as EIC. “Journalism allows me to tell people’s stories, express myself in a creative manner and talk to people to learn the side that’s not always represented,” Ernst said. Elected last year on a platform of engaging the community and restyling the paper and website, Ernst followed through on these goals with the complete redesigning of unewsonline.com and the physical layout of the paper. This year, he has a new goal. “I want to start a conversation and show people that we’re a major part of the SLU community. We want to engage the University in our
new style,” Ernst said. Assistant Vice President, Dean of Students and member of The UNews Advisory Board Scott Smith is encouraged by these goals. “Jonathan has built on the success of his predecessor to further improve the professional, both journalism and business, standards of the editors and staff as Editor-in-Chief. He has also demonstrated a commitment to balanced reporting during his tenure.” To become an Editor-inChief, a candidate must go through a three-part process. Initially, the Editorial Board must elect the candidate by a 2/3 majority. After this, the student’s name is sent to the University to insure that he or she is in good standing. Finally, the Advisory Board, composed of journalism professionals, students, the Dean of Students and faculty members, approves the election if protocol has been followed. Upon the election, Smith
said, “Jonathan’s love for SLU, dedication to quality journalism and commitment to report informative stories to the SLU community make him a great fit for The UNews.” Ernst, a Communication and Environmental Studies major, is a member of the service-oriented Micah Program. Ernst said he sees journalism as his service to the community. “It’s more than being involved. Journalism allows you to show another side of the story that might not always get told.” Young has high standards set for the year. “I expect greatness from Jonathan. The University News was voted as the best college newspaper in the state of Missouri last year,” Young said. “While the paper will only go as far as he and the other students allow it to go, I would not be surprised if [The] UNews was considered one of the best in the nation after this year.”
Greek Week: A time for students to share traditions By SEAN WORLEY News Editor
For some Saint Louis University students, this week is just the last week of March. For others this week is an opportunity to show their pride and their enthusiasm. For those students, this week is Greek Week. “One of my favorite parts of being Greek is Greek Week,” Bridget Toomey, a senior in the School of Nursing said. “It is an awesome way to really feel like part of the Greek community at SLU. Even though there is a competition aspect to it, everyone can get together and celebrate their respective organizations, as well as just being Greek at SLU in general.” Greek Week is a weeklong event that revolves around the idea of bringing students involved in Greek life together, said Kirstin Leih, Coordinator for the Student Involvement Center and specializing in Fraternity and Sorority life. “It can be difficult to bring everyone together at one time to celebrate being Greek,” Leih said. The shared history, shared values and a little healthy competition is what makes Greek Week, said Leih. Intrafraternity Council president Mike Zitzer said Greek Week is also about breaking down the “barriers” that can often be found within Greek life. He said these barriers can include the various relationships between specific fraternities and also between sororities. Greek Week aims to remove those barriers, at least for the week. While Greek Week is mainly focused on those students
involved in Greek life, both Zitzer and Leih agree it is important for non-Greek students to have an investment in the event as well as Greek life in general. “We try to get everyone involved,” Zitzer said. “We realize that for philanthropy efforts, it’s mostly Greeks giving to Greeks, but we want to get everyone involved.” This year for Greek Week, proceeds from the various philanthropic events will be donated to the organization Give Kids A Smile, a charity associated with the SLU School of Medicine. Zitzer also said it is important for non-Greek students to be aware of Greek life goingson because Greeks are “not just Greek.” “They’re in [the Student Government Association], they’re [Martin Luther King, Jr.] scholars and they’re [Presidential Scholars],” Zitzer said. “Greek life is so far reaching, and we’re kind of involved with everything, so it’s important to know who we are so we can work together in our organizations.” Leih had similar statements and said that most other schools have noticeable divides between Greek students and non-Greeks; she does not see such a divide here. “Many of our Greeks are friends with non-Greek students, and there is a fairly healthy relationship between the two,” Leih said. Through philanthropy and through active communication, Leih hopes the relationship with non-Greek students and their involvement in Greek life will grow stronger and more in-depth. “My goal, as a student involvement coordinator, is for each student to find their
Japan: SLU provides aid Continued from Page 1
cause tsunamis.” However, Herrmann said that the earthquake, which was the third largest in 100 years and most powerful to ever hit the country, was largely unexpected and that the barrier walls built to protect the country’s shores from large waves could not stop the tsunami that followed. Many areas of Japan were wiped out by the tsunami, including Sendai, located on the eastern shore. Morris arrived in the first C-17 to land in Sendai. A C-17 can hold up to 170,000 pounds of cargo, more than any other aircraft, and Morris said he and his crew worked for nearly 14 continuous days bringing immediate necessities, like pallets of water, food and blankets to the area on the first C-17 mission. “In two weeks, my one crew moved over a million pounds of aid,” Morris said. Herrmann said that the radiation from the destroyed nuclear reactors in the northern regions of Japan is also a threat to the Japanese people. Radiation is leaking into water sources, and Herrmann said this could cause health problems for many people if exposed to it in great doses. Hesaid exposure may also have long-term effects that may not be recognized immediately. While immediate assistance is necessary, Herrmann said he believes that a psychological concern will develop as time continues and after-
shocks keep occurring, which could bring more stress to the already burdened Japanese people. “The repeated pounding that they are being subject to is affecting them,” Herrmann said. Morris remains optimistic. “The Japanese are a proud people,” Morris said. “They will rebuild, faster than expected, I bet.” Morris returned from Japan on March 26, but said he would love to go back to help. “Operations like this one are the reason I joined the military,” Morris said. “I love flying, and sometimes you get to do your part for the greater good.” The military, however, is not the only organization giving assistance. People across the globe are reaching out to Japan in the relief effort, including students at SLU. The Asian American Association (AAA) is currently asking all Cross Cultural Center organizations to participate in a fundraiser that will take place the week of April 11. Athena Lee, president of AAA said she hopes to raise $5,000 during the fundraiser. “If all SLU students pitched in, that is definitely something that is very, very possible,” Lee said. The International Student Federation (ISF) and the Korean Student Association will host a benefit concert at 6 p.m. on April 8 at Salsaritias. A suggested donation of $5 will be given to the relief effort. “We hope it makes a difference,” Lee said.
3
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Class: Awareness raised Continued from Page 1
said. “SLU students are privileged… Not everyone is addiversity is one of the top five vantaged in this way, namely goals of the department and due to socio-economic status the larger financial depart- and class.” ment. According to Buck, SLU/ “Just like we want to go FUSED and their efforts to into certain areas because stu- bring awareness will serve the dents typically have a certain students well, especially since interest in a major or area, we socio-economic diversity is as also have recruiters that tar- close as Grand Boulevard. get areas that may be lower “It’s there; we have to income or underrepresented, choose to see and recognize underserved populations,” it,” Buck said. Wickliffe said. “It really starts Brooke Adams, a graduat that level.” ate student in the School of Wickliffe said feedback Social Work, attended SLU is typically positive in these for her undergraduate degree lower socio-economic status and was a part of the Federal areas. TRiO program. Though the price of atThe TRiO program serves tending SLU can be daunting, low-income, first-generation these prospective students college students and stuand their families are “hun- dents with disabilities. Adams gry” for the information about speaks to Buck’s point about ways to attend the University. the visibility, or lack thereof, Programs such as Federal of socio-economic awareness financial assistance, Univer- on campus. sity financial assistance and “If students want to graduFederal ate as wellWork-Study rounded allow for stuindividuals, dents to offthey need set the cost to be aware of attending of this type SLU. While SLU students are of diversity,” socio-ecoAdams said. nomic diver- privileged… Not ev- “Without an sity is about understanddollars and er yone is advantaged ing of both cents, mon- in this way, namely [rich and ey is not expoor] culhaustive of due to socio-economic tures, stuthe concept. dents can“ T o status and class. not consider me sociothemselves e c o n o m i c -LaTanya Buck to be culturdiversity is ally compereally the tent.” income and Adams the available said she income for grew up in life experiences and expo- a “culture of poor,” and there sure,” Wickliffe said. “It’s not were multiple times in her all numbers and dollars and undergraduate career that cents but where you live that she felt her peers did not undrives that.” derstand the “struggle of livKate Goedde, assistant ing without assets and other director of student financial safety nets.” This was espeservices, agrees that socio- cially present during Adams’ economic diversity is more volunteer activities at SLU than just finances, but also an when her “rich peers” would educational diversity. struggle to relate and commuGoedde said the only way nicate with those they worked to move beyond the stigma of with who were not part of the socio-economic diversity be- “rich culture.” ing solely concerned with fi“Not knowing that I came nancial situations is to create from the culture of poor, these “sensitivity” toward the topic. same students would make igBy sensitivity, Goedde does norant and hurtful comments not mean the topic should be because they were culturally handled with care and caution, incompetent when it came to but in developing a sensitivity the differences between rich and awareness about the is- and poor culture,” Adams sue so that it is more present said. in everyday interactions. “Without this awareness “It’s important to iden- of socio-economic diversity, tify the stories and sacrifices students cannot truly live out that students have to make the Jesuit mission of men and in order to obtain the type of women for others.” education they desire here at Through raising awareness [SLU],” Goedde said. and shedding light on the ofLaTanya Buck, program ten-overlooked issue of sociomanager of the Cross Cultural economic diversity, Sreepada Center, said SLU/FUSED is a and SLU/FUSED strive for welcomed addition to SLU be- elimination of circumstances cause it will bring awareness of ignorance that Adams and to those stories and experi- others have faced. ences. Socio-economic diversity “Socio-economic diversity is a reality, and as Buck said, and class seems to not be students have the choice to addressed as much as it has see and accept the reality in the opportunity to,” Buck their own lives.
“
”
Ledia Riley / Photographer
Phi Delta Theta members, Zack Warmbold, Matt Reilly, and Ulloa make a toothpaste mural in celebration of Greek Week home and their niche, whether that be through Greek life or another organization,” Leih said. “I think it’s great to see student organizations supporting each other, and I want to see the same support between Greeks and nonGreeks.” Leih said the relationship between Greek and nonGreek students is not about tolerating each other and noticing the existence of one another, but about “caring for each other’s well-being” and
working together. “We have much greater power collectively to create change,” Leih said. “I hope having letters or not having letters will not prevent students from reaching out to each other to start that change.” As one of the concluding events to Greek Week, nonGreek students are encouraged by the Greek community to attend Greekapalooza at 5 p.m. in Bauman-Eberhardt gym on Friday, April 1.
Cook: Tells of service, job Cook has also helped build schools in Nepal and the Suto operate in 43 countries dan. He attributes his philanaround the world. It was this thropic activity as one of his global expansion that really key motivators throughout spoke to Cook. his career. “Not only did I get to enjoy “The difference in your all the challenges of starting success levels is going to be and running a company in a tied to your leadership skills lot of different countries, but and your ability to mange and I got to travel a lot,” Cook motivate people,” Cook said. said. “It gave “One of me the opthe things I portunity to have found appreciate the in my long rich cultures usiness When you go into bcareer and diversiis ties that exist the slums of Bang- people like around the work for kok, you wind up with to world.” and follow It was soon a new appreciation of l e a d e r s after Cook bewho they gan his phil- the word ‘slum’. believe anthropic cacare about -John Cook reer. His first them.” was 17 years C o o k ago in Bangsaid one of kok, Thaithe biggest land, when he met an Ameri- dangers in being successful is can priest, whom he called Fr. the risk of becoming self-cenJoe. It was he who introduced tered. He cited working with Cook to the slums of Bang- the poor as one of the best kok. ways to stay grounded in the “I thought I knew what business world. poor was,” Cook said, “but Dean of the John Cook when you go into the slums of School of Business, Ellen Bangkok, you wind up with a Harshman, stated that she new appreciation of the word thought Cook’s strong focus slum.” on the relationship of busiFr. Joe was aspiring to in- ness and service was an imtegrated the children in slums portant message for the stuinto the Thailand public school dents to hear. system. Cook, impressed with “I hope they saw John the work being done, signed Cook as a real person, a sucon to help. Fifteen months cessful person who got his later, he opened up a 14-class- education at SLU and uses his room school. Since then, Cook resources to do good in the has helped to open nearly 30 world,” Harshman said. “It’s more schools and educate not something you always about 45,000 children. hear about in your classes.” Continued from Page 1
“
”
eat at jimmy’s twice a week, soon you’ll be a sandwich freak! Daryn P. - South Bend, IN
jimmyjohns.com TO FIND THE LOCATION NEAREST YOU VISIT JIMMYJOHNS.COM
AMERICA’S FAVorite sandwich delivery guys! ©2011 jimmy john’s franchise, llc all rights reserved.
™
The University News
Opinion
Talk to us: Priya Sirohi 314.977.2812 oped.unews@gmail.com
Thursday, March 31, 2011
unewsonline.com
Letters
“Freedom of the press—print, online and broadcast—is a basic right in a democratic society and is valuable in promoting the development of students as socially responsible persons ... The University News is a student voice, not the student voice. The views of The University News are the expressions of the students involved ... If [The University News] can represent a point of view around which discussion may develop, it serves a legitimate and needed purpose.” From The University News’ Charter
to the editor The University News reserves the right not to publish any letters that are deemed intentionally and/or inappropriately inflammatory, more than the 300-word limit or unsigned by the original author. The following are letters and/or website comments. Because the identities of website posters cannot be verified, all website comments should be treated as anonymous. Actual letters to the editor may be submitted online at unewsonline. com or e-mailed to oped.unews@gmail.com. Please include your daytime telephone number.
Contact us:
Hammocks on campus are an ill-concieved black eye
Busch Student Center Suite 354 20 N. Grand Blvd. St. Louis, MO 63103 Newsroom: (314) 977-2812 unews.slu@gmail.com Advertising: (314) 977-2813 ads.unews@gmail.com unewsonline.com facebook.com/theunews twitter.com/theunews editor-in-chief Jonathan Ernst (314) 977-1590 eic.unews@gmail.com general manager JOE Mckeon ads.unews@gmail.com Managing Editor Andrea Royals unewsme@gmail.com News Editors Kristen Miano Sean Worley slunews@gmail.com Enterprise Editor ERIKA MILLER enterprise.unews@gmail.com op/ed editor PRIYA SIROHI Assoc. OP/ED editor DANIELA MONDRAGON oped.unews@gmail.com Arts editor Ashley Jones arts.unews@gmail.com Sports editor BRIAN BOYD Assoc. Sports editor DERRICK NEUNER sports.unews@gmail.com photo editor Noah Berman Assoc. PHOTO editorS SHAH (YUQING XIA) KATI CUNDARI photo.unews@gmail.com Design Director Brianna Radici design.unews@gmail.com Chief copy editor SARAH MAREK copydesk.unews@gmail.com Account executive madalyn guy ads.unews@gmail.com Account executive RACHEL CAMPBELL ads.unews@gmail.com Account executive CONNOR BERRY ads.unews@gmail.com Adviser Jason L. Young jyoung42@slu.edu The Editorial Board of The University News Recognizes Avis Meyer, Ph.D. as the newspaper’s faculty mentor.
The University News is a member of the Associated Collegiate Press, the Student Press Law Center, the College Media Advisers and the Missouri College Media Association, a division of the Missouri Press Association. -First copy, free. Each additional copy, $1.00.
Editorials
Editorials are opinion pieces written by the Editorial Board of The University News. The editorials printed in this space represent the opinion of The University News. Commentaries and Letters to the Editor represent the opinions of the signed authors but do not necessarily represent the opinions of The University News.
Misperceptions and barriers are death for diversity and discourse If perception was reality, then the world would exist in nearly a million dimensions. The Socio-Economic Diversity Sur vey conducted by Saint Louis University for Undergraduate Socio-Economic Diversity (SLU/FUSED), a committee under Student Government Association, brings to light one of those perceptions – or rather, misperceptions. SLU students felt, for the greater part, that most other SLU students were in a higher income range than themselves. Exactly 58.92 percent placed themselves in the “Middle class” to “Lower class” range in terms of family income; they perceived that 71.67 percent of the student body was “Upper-middle class” and “Upper class.” There is a gap between how students view themselves in relation to fellow SLU students. The reality is that only 41.08 percent of the student body placed itself under the “Upper-middle class” and “Upper class” categories; it is not the over-whelming majority we think it is. It is a misperception. Misperceptions prevent us from speaking to individuals who can impact our paradigms positively, who can shape our thoughts and change the arc of our lives.
Blogs, additional commentaries and activities such as our web poll are all available on our website: unewsonline.com.
This is the heart of all problems in diversity, and socio-economic issues most certainly fall under diversity. When we view our fellow human beings as “others” and ourselves as “different” from them in some way, we change our behavior towards them; we become closed off. No longer are we speaking to equals, but to “others.” It is incredibly disconcerting how quickly this translates into strict class divisions, racial tensions and stereotyped “cliques.” When we see ourselves as less wealthier than our fellow students, what does this mean for our daily interactions? Misperceptions prevent vital communication. Divisions, ever ything from exclusive social-circles to major gaps in economic class, discourage relationships between persons that could be rewarding and enlightening. Barriers are death to diversity. Colliding and interacting with each other will lead us to fight barriers of communication. We need to share our stories, bring our backgrounds into daily conversations. Only then can we be free to share, grow and learn together as fellow students at Saint Louis University in a beautiful, unified dimension and vision of diversity.
We think all is not well when ‘LOL’ and ‘OMG’ enter the official English dictionary We need to start learning the difference between words. There are words like “metonymical discontinuity” reserved for formal documents such as research papers. There are words that we need to recognize and use only as slang terms – such as LOL, OMG, <3 and IMHO (In my humble/ honest opinion). But these terms have now bridged the divide between formal and informal since their grand entrance into The Oxford English Dictionary, as reported by The Huffington Post on March 23. This change from “slang” to “word” raises interesting questions about the nature of language. When Shakespeare invented 1700 words only 500 years ago, most of which are still part of our daily usage, few questioned his legitimacy. Most of us today cannot believe that words like “bloody,” “hurry” or “road” were invented by the Bard; they are indistinguishable from “normal” English and remain intrinsic to it (“indistinguishable” and “intrinsic” are, indeed, more Shakespearean inventions). But now that OMG and LOL have been slotted comfortably next to words like “omnipotent” and “loquacious,” we have to learn the difference between “real words” and sim-
“
ple acronyms. There is some discrepancy about the idea that LOL and OMG are somehow legitimate words that deserve recognition in the official dictionary of the English language. If these new terms can enter our official vernacular, what does it say about such contractions as “b/c” and “w/”? The upcoming generation, believe it or not, is already beginning to use such informal terms in their English papers. We need to see a difference between what real words are, and what are simply phrases and contractions that deserve to remain in the informal world of text messages and Facebook – not in the official documentation of our language. There is a line that needs to be drawn. While we should celebrate the evolution of language and the myriad of colorful and ebullient ways we express ourselves, we should also leave room for “old school” methods of communication. We stand to lose the basics of English in the face of these rapid changes. So before we can LOL, we need to laugh out loud. Shakespeare might say that “brevity is the soul of wit,” but we say that longevity is the heart of enduring, intelligent language.
We stand to lose the basics of English in the face of these rapid changes.
”
Posted below are the results from our web poll on The University News’ website. These are the mythical creatures students chose to have. (49 votes total) What mythical creature would you have as a pet?
Check out our blogs!
-The Conservative Billiken SLU’s conservative voice -The Progressive Billiken SLU’s liberal voice -Foreign Affairs Students studying abroad -Going into OT On and off the court - 24/7
Peony Lee / Chief Illustrator
35%
Dragon
31%
Pokemon
24%
Hippogriff
10%
Liger
0
10
20
30
40
50
The hammocks in the quad are an ill-conceived, black eye for the University’s campus. Of course they are the new fresh thing and seem “cool,” as the SGA president noted in her weekly email address; however the hammocks are nothing more than a tacky attempt to be something that we are not. Students and alumni alike take great pride in our campus. In fact millions of dollars have been donated throughout the years specifically for the “beautification” of the campus. And how do we say thank you to the donors? By erecting some of the worst looking objects to hit the quad since that freaky-colored Michael Jackson lookalike statue that use to be in front of the library (may he and the statue rest in peace). I am so happy that students want to have a place to hang out and relax, which is why the addition of the picnic benches in the quad were perfect. Can I ask a question? What is going to happen during the winter months? Is the University going to pull up those six giant wooden stakes? Unlikely. I highly doubt that the hammocks will do anything more than rot during the winter months. Is there a second phase to this project I am unaware of? Are they going to disguise those six atrocious wooden Lincoln Logs by adding some soup cans and calling it an Andy Warhol exhibit? What have we really accomplished? We have destroyed the look and feel of the quad so that, at any given time, three to six students can sit in hammocks? The bottom line is that they should be moved to SLUruba, next to the palm trees and sand volleyball court, where they belong. I mean, come on. Were there really not enough places to kiss on campus that we had to add these bastions of bad taste? - Jared Walsh is a 2008 graduate and a third-year law student.
SLU needs to improve bathroom facilities Ah, it’s the small things in life we learn to appreciate as we get older. I’m writing in support of Doug Anstoetter’s piece, “Single-ply toilet paper makes life on SLU’s campus ‘rough’.” I’ve been at SLU for 25 years, and it seems this issue has gotten rougher in the last several years. And it’s one thing for those of us who are here every day—either paying for the opportunity or being paid for the opportunity—but imagine how the general public must feel. If you spend your hard-earned money to go to an event at Chaifetz Arena, pay the vendor prices for refreshments, parking, etc., the least—the very least—you could expect is halfway decent toilet paper. The last time I was at Chaifetz with friends, I heard positive comments about the facility itself and nothing but negative about the bathroom facilities. The quality of the toilet paper, paper towels for drying hands, scarcity of soap in the bathrooms—this was the experience my friends had at Chaifetz. This University is better than that—and people who pay to come to SLU, whether as students or patrons of Chaifetz, deserve better than they get in the bathrooms! - Mary Schmelter is an Academic Adviser in the School for Professional Studies.
Quotes of the week
“ “
I like the mascot because it is unique, and I like unique. - Cody Ellis is a sophomore in the College of Arts and Sciences.
Operations like this one are the reason I joined the military. I love flying, and sometimes you get to do your part for the greater good. - Chuck Morris is a captain of the U.S. Air Force and a SLU ‘02 alumnus.
60
”
See Page 9.
”
See Page 3.
Opinion
unewsonline.com
5
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Biondi’s Five Tactics for Keeping Students Powerless As a senior, a student organization leader and a member of the Billiken community, I feel obligated to share the following observaCommentary tions about the administrative practices of Saint Louis University. There is a prevailing myth on this campus that students are apathetic – a ridiculous notion that Thomas Bloom they lack any interest in acting for the betterment of themselves, their University, their community and their world. This myth is based on an observation of inaction among the student body, but it is a misguided conclusion. Inaction among the student body does not result from lack of interest or laziness. It comes from powerlessness. Students have been robbed of their voice on this campus. From our first day as Billikens, we are systematically instructed to keep our heads down and go about our business. We are not to make waves here. We are not to speak up. We are to remain silent. This is not a product of a complex, faceless system. It is a product of several well-constructed tactics of SLU President Lawrence Biondi, S.J. He will not admit to using these tactics, and they cannot be found in your student handbook. Nevertheless, students will recognize them in their experiences here. So here they are, Biondi’s Five Tactics for Keeping Students Powerless: 1. Bureaucracy Over the years, students have organized and worked for change at SLU. Somehow, in the process of navigating SLU’s maze of departments, administrative policies and endless paperwork, their passion dries up. For student groups, organizing an event is a nightmare. Before approaching administrators with an event, student leaders may spend weeks or even months planning it. Paperwork with detailed information about the nature and purpose of the event must be submitted to multiple departments months before the event is scheduled to take place. Students are then quizzed about the content of the event and often asked to make adjustments - which disrupt its entire structure. Whenever possible, student groups are pushed back to square one and forced to re-imagine the whole event – requiring weeks of planning and re-litigating the entire process. Bureaucracy is not only a barrier to student groups; it is a hindrance for the entire student body. It is the force behind the University’s yearly housing fiasco and the headache that is the class registration process. Finding the right person in the right department to address an issue requires more research time than most students have time for and responses rarely address the issue in a timely manner. Most problematic is that rules and policies are inconsistent and unreliable. Often, they are subject to change without notification, at the whim of administrators. When students become problematic for Biondi, all he has to do is enact a policy change to sweep their legs out from under them. This tac-
ideals, it would be a reasonable predicament, but because the change will come about out of ill-governed necessity, we might as well give up on democracy. It might seem like a minute issue, but to those people who are deprived of a most basic American right, it’s far more pressing. Don’t serve up the pressure of voting if you can’t deliver on your half of the bargain, Missouri legistlature.
Here we go again with U.S. involvement. When it comes to political gossip, media love the Middle East, especially when Commentary there is trouble. Almost immediately, the focus is then turned to the U.S. President: “So, Mr. President, what is the plan of action now that so-and-so country is expeParisa Rouie riencing uprisings? What’s the agenda, Mr. President?” For many in the western part of the world, democracy looks good for the Middle East, and it’s our duty as Americans to “make it happen” wherever in doesn’t exist. But this “democracy” has seldom been defined. No one knows how to explain this system with which every single rioting nation is prescribed. What about it is guaranteed to bring peace and justice to everyone from secular France to “separation of Church and state” America to Islamic states like Iran and Saudi Arabia? It is not more than letting people live the way they want to live. It assumes people are capable of running their country, and that this assumption is right. As the world moves toward democracy, progress and nuclearization, Middle Eastern nations want democracy too. And why not? America, the iconic democratic nation, will be the first to help them get their cake and eat it too. Like former President George Bush helped Iraqis oust the dictator Saddam Hussein, President Barack Obama has vowed to keep “protecting the Libyan people from Qaddhafi’s forces … and prevent further atrocities.” This is an United Nations-like vow, meaning “we’ve got it covered” when a country is in flux. But has the U.S. tried keeping its military out of other nations’ business? It sounds like a nice change, to say the least. Why does every revolt have to turn into a full-blown revolutionary war to keep the global media entertained and provide NATO an opportunity to say, “It was our bomb that’s done it. We helped them democratize”? If a nation’s “people” are powerful enough to run it, let us see if they can make the change they want with their own power. It seems to have worked just fine in Tunisia and Egypt. By involving NATO in the conflict and bombing Qaddhafi’s forces, it looks like war; it’s Afghanistan and Iraq for the U.S. It looks bad for a president that won a Nobel Peace Prize and a government that was elected on the grounds of ending wars. If the U.S. is one of the top military powers, it is also at the top when it comes to media and technology. So why flaunt artillery when there is Facebook and Twitter? Since many public media outlets are government-controlled in these rioting countries, their young populations have turned to the Internet to unite their voices, advertise and plan their riots. They have used the Internet to declare their insistent voices and presence to the government. They have thrown the governments of the entire Middle East and North Africa into a frightened frenzy and already toppled a couple. But when a bully like Muammar Qaddhafi starts spilling innocent blood, the natural reaction is to pick a fight. Who thinks about the people? No one, apparently. Lobbyists and political analysts have criticized our government for the way it has been handling the situation in North Africa and the Middle East, very often crippling the power of the people when it really targets the government. But unless we want to look bad in the eyes of the world, the U.S. government has to do something that looks good. And hopefully the Libyan and Afghani people will come to understand later. There are peaceful ways of empowering people to weaken their bullying governments. Allowing information and news to circulate freely would create a venue for people so they can make informed decisions, and be aware of their surroundings and their opposition. The way governments have been fooling their peoples has been by closing access to the truth and releasing false information until it is mainstream. They keep a smiling front to so people remain happy and unquestioning. But people are smarter than that. With recent events in Egypt and Tunisia, leaders who see themselves mirrored in the defeats are shaking in their pants. All are bound to take the ugliest extreme measures imaginable to hang on to power. Sooner or later, dictatorships of any brand, secular or Islamic fundamentalist, republican or monarchical, are bound to topple. And whether or not “democracy” will replace it should be up to the people – not a foreign military power.
Stephanie Mueller is a freshman in the College of Arts and Sciences.
Parisa Rouie is a sophomore in the College of Arts and Sciences.
Mauriel Blakeley / Illustrator
tic is frequently implemented as a “spring surprise,” ensuring that any backlash fades away over the summer months. 2. Avoidance Bureaucracy alone is not enough to control students. With enough passion and determination, a student may eventually succeed in untangling any bureaucratic nightmare. Avoidance allows Biondi to shirk accountability. When students have a concern or an issue they want addressed, they are never given an opportunity to meet with decision makers like Biondi; instead, they meet with their lackeys. Lower-level administers have no power to address student needs because they have no power to change policies. They are puppets with invisible strings. They are instructed not to reveal their puppetmasters, and they communicate with students in one direction: topdown. Their function is to stall and demoralize students. Unable to express their concerns to decision makers, or even know who the decision makers are, students are left running around in circles, never gaining any traction. 3. Saying “NO” without ever actually saying “NO” In the process of being jerked around by lower-level administrators, students are never explicitly told that they cannot do something. They are told that there is something wrong with the way they are doing it, or they are asked to engage in a dialogue about how best to do it. This way, Biondi cannot be accused of censoring or silencing students because he never does so explicitly. Instead, he stalls them. He forces them to justify what they are doing until it is too late for them to do it in the first place. When students complain about this to anyone unfamiliar with Biondi’s tactics, the students are ignored because the issue is reduced to one of process rather than morality. For example, Biondi did not originally ban the “Vagina Mono-
logues” from campus; he merely encouraged Una to find a more constructive way of addressing the issue of sexual assault. He said that the yearly performance was becoming “redundant,” suggesting that it would eventually be allowed on campus again if Una were willing to do something else for a few years. This tactic allowed Biondi to portray Una as uncooperative when they protested the decision, drawing attention away from the reality that he did, in fact, ban the “Vagina Monologues”. Perhaps the most infuriating use of this tactic occurs when censorship is masked as a concern for the well-being of the student or group. Often, rather than telling a student group it cannot have an event on campus, Biondi’s lackeys will tell the group that they want to help make the event more effective. The group’s leaders are isolated and pulled into meeting after meeting, in which there is vague discussion about how to make the event more fitting to the group’s mission. Over time, the group attempts to adapt to these vague suggestions until the event, which looks nothing like its original design, fits Biondi’s arbitrary and hidden standards. 4. Control All Forms of Communication on Campus A student may not hang a poster, hand out flyers, hold a meeting or even stand in the quad and make a speech without first going through a bureaucratic approval process. If the content of the communication does not meet Biondi’s standards, his lackeys will inform students that it may not be distributed on campus. Thus, any attempt to organize students to combat Biondi’s tactics is easily thwarted by his grasp over these crucial forms of communication. While some media is still free from Biondi’s control (such as parts of The University News), he has made frequent and welldocumented attempts to extend his reach over these pages through intimidation and even force .
5. Hide Behind Dogma Perhaps the most reprehensible tactic employed by Father Biondi is his frequent use of the University’s Jesuit Mission in order to justify censorship. After four years here, I have seen the Jesuit Mission used in two ways – marketing and silencing. If it is not on a brochure, it is probably being used to shut down a student group or event. Why does the Jesuit Mission require the silencing of students but never obligate the University to adopt environmentally friendly practices or hire union contractors? It would seem that the power to write the scope and definition of SLU’s Jesuit Mission rests solely in the hands of its upper-level administrators. A few individuals, faced with pressure from University donors and interest groups, have the power to decide the precise meaning of SLU’s foundational mission. What is frequently perceived to be a divinely inspired mission is actually a contrived tool of administrators who are in the pockets of donors. Biondi’s tactics are effective and powerful, but ultimately flawed. Biondi’s objective is to rob students of their power, but his tactics do not achieve this. Fundamentally, they only serve to make students unaware of their power. Faced with such impressive obstructions to action, students are left with a sense that they cannot change things. Sadly, Biondi has succeeded in creating a myth of apathy. He does not have to make us powerless because he has succeeded in making us believe that we are powerless. In my last days at SLU, I want to remind my fellow Billikens of one thing: We are not powerless. We do not have to accept the status quo. This University works for us, and we have an obligation to demand better. Never surrender your power – your passion and your conviction. Be persistent, be radical, be Billikens. Thomas Bloom is a senior in the College of Arts and Sciences.
The Missouri legislature is killing the youth vote The Missouri Legislature has officially resurrected the controversial Voter ID Bill. This bill, if passed, will require all who plan on votCommentary ing in the state of Missouri to present a valid Missouri ID at the polls, regardless of their home state. This bill was originally disStephanie Mueller cussed in 2006 when it was found to be unconstitutional by state legislature. Recently reintroduced to the House, Missouri residents are abuzz with what this means for the future of the Show-Me State. While some, permanent Missouri residents claim that this will narrow the voting demographic to only those most affected by the elections, it seems that even more Missouri residents (both permanent and temporary) are prepared to fight the legislation for its exclusivity and its elusive access. Saint Louis University is a conglomeration of students from across the United States, many of whom hold identification from their home state instead of that of Missouri. In the past, student IDs from Missouri institutions of higher learning have been sufficient to vote in the state of Missouri and adhere to that ever-present “Vote or Die” message
that bombards the 18-24 age group around election time. If found to be constitutional, this bill will no longer allow student IDs to be sufficient at the polls. If the bill is passed, chances are that a good majority of SLU students will not have the opportunity to vote in upcoming elections. Potentially, these students could head to a local DMV, equipped with their birth certificate, pay the fee for a Missouri ID and vote to their heart’s content, but the hassle of this process seems like a price that many won’t be willing and shouldn’t have to pay. The irony of the ordeal is that young voters are often the most targeted audiences during election time, but here, the very governing body that encourages young adults to vote is considering diminishing many of their chances to do so. Missouri is endowed with multiple popular universities that attract thousands of students from across the country. If education is such a priority for the state, they should probably take into consideration the basic rights of those that they are so intent on educating. We, as the next generation, are told that we are the future and we need to vote to become an active part of society, but then we’re excluded from doing so, finding ourselves at a politically helpless but seemingly apathetic dead end. Yes, it makes sense that those who will be most affected in the long-term should have the right to vote, but
Starla Salazar / Illustrator
those who are affected in the shortterm have a right to the benefits of law, too. Not only does this affect college students, but it has the potential to affect the entire state for as long as the law stands. Traditionally, younger voters have tended to gravitate towards democratic ideologies. If this younger set of voters is deprived of their right to vote, the Democratic Party will see a serious decline in support coming from this great, yet slightly confused state. If this political decline had come about for voluntary reasons and shifting
Protests are best done by the people
Games
The University News Advertise with us ads.unews@gmail.com (314)-977-2813
Thursday, March 31, 2011
unewsonline.com
Comics/Student Art
Last Weekâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Solutions:
By Noah Berman
Sudoku
Figger It
Crossword
Word Search
The University News
Arts
Talk to us: Ashley Jones 314.977.2812 arts.unews@gmail.com
Thursday, March 31, 2011
unewsonline.com
OUT
Motion City Soundtrack on board for Spring Fever
TOWN
Cartel set for concert opener
on the
Arts Editor’s Picks
MUSIC Thursday, March 31 9 p.m. Peter Wolf Crier with Cassie Morgan and Thankful Tree The Billiken Club Admission is free Friday, April 1 7 p.m. Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring The St. Louis Symphony For ticket information call 314-534-1700 Saturday, April 2 7 p.m. Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring The St. Louis Symphony For ticket information call 314-534-1700 Sunday, April 3 2 p.m. Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring The St. Louis Symphony For ticket information call 314-534-1700
MOVIES Friday, April 1
By ASHLEY JONES Arts Editor
It will be a night of pop and rock at Chaifetz Arena on Wednesday, April 27. Student Activities Board has announced that Motion City Soundtrack will be the main act for the Spring Fever concert. SAB president Stephanie Hart said she thought students would be happy about the announcement because “they have been on the list for at least three years.” Hart explained that when the band played at The Pageant in Oct. 2010, there were many Saint Louis University students in attendance. Motion City Soundtrack released their most recent album, “My Dinosaur Life” in January of 2010. This was the fourth album for the band, but their first with Colombia Records. It features songs such as “Disappear,” “Her Words Destroyed My Planet” and “@!#?@!.” When creating the album, the band collaborated with producer and Blink-182 bassist Mark Hoppus. Hoppus also worked with the band on their second album “Commit This To Memory,” which was released in 2005. Songs on this album include “Everything is All Right” and “Time Turned Fragile.” In addition to Motion City Soundtrack, SAB has also booked Cartel as the opening act.
Photo Courtesy of Stunt Company Media, Inc.
Student Activities Board has announced that Motion City Soundtrack (Above) will be the main act for this year’s Spring Fever concert. They have also released that Cartel will be the opening act. The concert is set to take place on Wednesday, April 27 in Chaifetz Arena. In the past, SAB has booked acts such as Ben Folds, Lifehouse and Augustana for the concert. The band released their third and most recent album “Cylces” in October of 2010. It includes songs such as “The Perfect Mistake,” “Let’s Go” and “Faster Ride.” Their first album “Cartel,” which was released in 2007, includes songs such as “The Fortunate” and “Wasted.” Their second album “Chroma,” released in 2005, featured hits such as “Honestly” and “Say Anything
(Else).” In the past SAB has booked acts such as Ben Folds, Lifehouse and Augustana for the Spring Fever concert. Junior Maggie Foster said that she had attended Spring Fever events in the past because “they were fun and interesting…They were easy to get to and free.” Despite having attended in the past, Foster said that
Loufest collaborates with Billiken Club
4:40, 7 and 9:20 p.m. Sucker Punch Moolah Theatre Tickets are $9 for adults, $7 for matinees, students and seniors and $6 for children Saturday, April 2 2:20, 4:40, 7 and 9:20 p.m. Sucker Punch Moolah Theatre Tickets are $9 for adults, $7 for matinees, students and seniors and $6 for children Sunday, April 3 2:20, 4:40, 7 and 9:20 p.m. Sucker Punch Moolah Theatre Tickets are $9 for adults, $7 for matinees, students and seniors and $6 for children Monday, April 4 4:40, 7 and 9:20 p.m. Sucker Punch Moolah Theatre Tickets are $9 for adults, $7 for matinees, students and seniors and $6 for children Tuesday, April 5 4:40, 7 and 9:20 p.m. Sucker Punch Moolah Theatre Tickets are $9 for adults, $7 for matinees, students and seniors and $6 for children Wednesday, April 6 4:40, 7 and 9:20 p.m. Sucker Punch Moolah Theatre Tickets are $9 for adults, $7 for matinees, students and seniors and $6 for children
Noah Berman / Photo Editor
(From Left to Right) The Airborne Toxic Event, Carolina Chocolate Drops and She & Him were just a few of the bands to perform at the first annual LouFest, which took place in Aug. 2010. This year, LouFest will take place on Aug. 27 and 28 in Forest Park.
Groups work to promote indie music By ASHLEY JONES Arts Editor
Last summer, LouFest entered the St. Louis music scene with its first two-day music festival. Now, the Loufest team is partnering with the Billiken Club to promote Indie music. “The purpose of LouFest is to promote Indie music and St. Louis,” Cohen said. Cohen developed the idea for LouFest after moving from Austin, Texas, to St. Louis. At that time, St. Louis lacked a two-day music festival in a park, so Cohen created one. The festival had its first run last August in Forest Park. It featured national acts such as The Airborne Toxic Event, She & Him and Carolina Chocolate Drops and local acts such as So Many Dynamos, Magnolia Summer and Kim Massie. The Billiken Club and Loufest began their partnership this semester. The first show they presented together was Dum
Dum Girls with Dirty Beaches and Minks on Feb. 23. Then, they presented Akron Family with Delicate Steve on Feb. 28. They will also present Zola Jesus with Cult of Youth on April 14 and The Fresh & Onlys with Crocodiles on April 19. The Billiken Club manager Hunter Hostettler explained that the Billiken Club team strives to bring solid acts to the club. “It is an opportunity for the St. Louis community to hear good music. It might be things they have not heard before and later they will listen to it,” Hostettler said. According to Cohen, promoting these bands in partnership with the Billiken Club goes along with the purpose of Loufest. Hostettler describes the partnership as being for promotional purposes because LouFest has a table at these shows where they are able to promote their message. He also explained that the Billiken Club will have the chance to do the
same at LouFest 2011. Cohen said that he plans to collaborate with the Billiken Club again after the April 19. He explained that “the Billiken Club is responsible for the bands that appear in the club; LouFest promotes bands that fit its genre.” “A lot of times they are rising artists that are not necessarily known to the public. This coincides with what LouFest is doing,” Hostettler said. This year, LouFest will be held on Aug. 27 and 28. The current line-up for the festival includes The Roots, Troubadour Dali and Jon Hardy and the Public. The festival will also feature food from local restauraunts and various retail vendors. The greening effort started at last years festival will be continued at the 2011 festival. This effort includes free valet bike parking, recycling, composting and a refillable water station. For more information on the festival and the line-up, visit loufest.com.
she would probably not attend this year’s concert. She explained that due to a busy schedule, she likes to relax on her own time. “I’ll go depending on who it is,” sophomore Matt Stegeman said. “I think that a concert that’s livelier would be a bigger draw.” In addition to the Spring Fever concert on April 27,
SAB will also be hosting several other Spring Fever events. These events include a blood drive on April 12, a performance by comedian Andy Woodhull on Tuesday, April 26, a festival in the Quad and outdoor movie on Thursday, April 28 and a campus- wide game on Friday, April 9. For more information on the Spring Fever events, visit sab.slu.edu.
Folk band’s latest album provides fresh, real tunes On Friday, April 8, Southeast Engine will bring their folksy beats and heartfelt lyrics to the Billiken Album Review Club in the con -tinuation of a series of concerts at the venue. T h e b a n d g r a c e s Stephanie Mueller S a i n t Louis Un -iversity’s campus following the release of their third album “Canary,” which they hope will live up to the admiration of their previous two albums, the second of which received universal acclaim from Metacritic. The press release for “Canary” said the album “tells the stories of a single Appalachian family holding on through the violent deprivations of the Great Depression.” The concept for this album is undeniably original. Rarely do modern albums have such a distinct storyline that they are able to stick to with such intensity and rigidity as Southeast Engine managed to accomplish. The cohesion of each song to the overarching theme is impressive, even if the subject matter itself is not what would currently constitute relevant or even necessarily exciting. The lyrics are what allow the theme to transfer from song to song so well. The songs are packed with emotion, if seemingly outdated by modern standards, referencing debt collectors, FDR and rag gowns. The pure heart of the lead vocalist becomes blatant with every word he sings, his voice raw and dripping with sincerity. While unique as compared to more mainstream folkrock, Southeast Engine still manages to incorporate the wavering and soulful voice of Mumford and Sons’ Marcus Mumford, with the subtle enthusiasm of Noah and the Whale. But neither of those bands could really describe Southeast Engine due to the complexity and unrivaled execution of the concept of “Canary.” Bluegrass undertones are what really differentiate Engine from its competitors. Simple guitar chords
combine with harmonica and the occasional piano interlude leading to an engaging cacophony of sounds from the four-man band. The whole of the album contributed to its endearing nature but one track, in particular, stood out. “Adeline of the Appalachian Mountains” was most notable due to its sweet sentiment and floating expression of love, expressed with lyrics like, “so they watch you from afar, how they wonder who you are, like the brightest burning star on an early spring night.” The song embodies the downtrodden struggles that the band attempts to portray with the album in a beautifully wrapped package. The only factor working against “Canary” is its lack of potential to appeal to a broad audience. While this, of course, should not be the motivation for creating music, the appeal of this album is likely to be so narrow that Southeast Engine will never have the opportunity to get their music and innovation heard by a widespread audience like they deserve. Even those who are proud fans of bands like Mumford might not find the same affinity for Engine’s twang and country backbeats. Southeast Engine deserves recognition, not as much for their catchy tunes or especially pretty arrangements, but because they are innovative and unique in a society where the same song can play every 15 minutes on a radio station and still be considered Top 40. While Southeast Engine might not exactly be my normal tune of choice, it was fresh, real and well worth the listen.
Photo Courtesy of Misra Records
Southeast Engine released “Canary” on March 29. The band will play at the Billiken Club on Friday, April 8.
The University News
Arts
8
Thursday, March 31, 2011
unewsonline.com
‘Sucker Punch’ storyline lacks punch Visual appeal fails to make up for poor plot development With his previous films consisting of “300” and “Watchmen,” director Zack Snyder has formulated Movie Review all his films in the same m a n n e r, and “Sucker Punch” is no exception. T h e movie lacks substantial Luciano Formilan plot and, although formulaically visually appealing, would fail if not for this gimmick. “Sucker Punch” tells the story of Baby Doll (Emily Browning), who is forced by her abusive stepfather to the Lennox House for the Mentally Insane after accidentally shooting her sister. Upon arrival, her stepfather requests Baby Doll be lobotomized, to cover the past abuse, and pays off the asylum’s orderly, Blue Jones (Oscar Isaac), to get it done. Baby Doll soon retreats into her own “Pan’s Labyrinth” inspired fantasy world to cope with the harsh facility, and the arrival of the doctor, to perform the lobotomy, in five days. In her fantasy, Baby Doll is a newly arrived dancer at a brothel owned by the mobster
3/5 The Good: Visually stunning The Bad: The ending is disappointing The Bad: Watch for its entertainment value
Blue and soon makes friends with Blondie (Vanessa Hudgens), Amber (Jamie Chung), Rocket (Jena Malone) and her older sister Sweet Pea (Abbie Cornish). During one of her dance lessons, Baby Doll creates another fantasy world, in ancient Japan. In this prehistoric era, she meets the Wise Man (Scott Glenn), who reveals that, by collecting five items (a map, a knife, a key, fire and a fifth hidden item), she will be able to escape the brothel and the looming “High Roller,” who will be there in five days. Once escaping her fantasy in early Japan, Baby Doll returns to the brothel where she has mesmerized everyone in the dance room. Acknowledging her newfound power over anyone who watches her dance, Baby Doll and her new friends vow to
Photo courtesy of Warner Bros.
escape. Armed with the ambition to collect all the items, Baby Doll uses her mesmerizing dancing to not only help in the collection of the items, but to escape on adventures. These adventures involve killing steampunk, clockwork German soldiers, fighting orc-filled castles inhabited by dragons and defusing a bomb. The word adventure does no credit for a film which is only limited by the fantasies created by human imagination. “Sucker Punch” takes its viewer on a journey that has non-stop action. And, although plot elements lack in characterization, conflict and progression, this film is not meant to be watched for its storyline, but for its entertainment value.
Graduating in May? Meet SLU young alumni at two upcoming events!
Study nature. In nature. Loyola University Chicago’s new Retreat and Ecology Campus gets you out of the city and back to nature. Welcome to a classroom that spans more than 100 acres of prairies, savannas, woodlands, wetlands, and ponds.
Plant Biology Ecology Laboratory Nature in Literature Sustainable Agriculture Drawing I
To learn more or apply, visit LUC.edu/summer/lurec.
Young Alumni and Graduating Senior Mass and Social Sunday, April 3, 9:00 p.m. Meet SLU Young Alumni at a social immediately after Mass in the Ballroom of College Church Ted Drewes and cookies from Angel Baked Cookies will be served Register online: alumni.slu.edu/yaamass11 Senior Night at Busch Stadium Monday, April 4 Pittsburgh Pirates vs. St. Louis Cardinals 5 p.m. - Pre-game Party, Hilton at the Ballpark 7:15 p.m. - First Pitch, Busch Stadium Cost: $25 (includes pre-game party, t-shirt and ticket to the game) Register online: alumni.slu.edu/seniorbaseball11
The University News
Sports
Talk to us: Brian Boyd 314.977.2812 sports.unews@gmail.com
Thursday, March 31, 2011
unewsonline.com
Club Rugby
Billiken Briefs Men’s Basketball Sophomore guard Christian Salecich has requested and been granted release from his scholarship from Saint Louis University. Salecich saw both his minutes and statistics take a sharp decline this past season relative to his freshman performance. His minutes per game dipped from 28.3 to 14.1, and his scoring average declined from 6.4 to 2.3. His shooting percentages remained fairly consistent, however. For more information on Salecich’s departure, see the April 7 edition of The University News.
Impressive season sends team to nationals By BRIAN BOYD Sports Editor
An old adage says, “The will to win is useless without the will to prepare.” The Saint Louis University Club Rugby team has taken that mantra to heart. An off-season filled with a rigorous workout routine prepared SLU their grueling season against top-tier competition. The product of their hard work is an opportunity to compete for a National Championship. SLU spent their fall season seeking the toughest competition they could find, squaring off against teams such as LSU, Arkansas State and Oklahoma, all of whom highly
BILLIKEN SCOREBOARD
1910s-1950s
R
1960s-1970s Ryan Giacomino / Photographer
The Billiken mascot came to be associated with SLU when a sportswriter compared head football coach John Bender to the Billiken itself, a popular charm in the early 20th century. By BRIAN BOYD Sports Editor
Softball
1980s-1990s
R
Current
Opening Day brings out the best in fans For every true baseball fan, there is no day quite like Opening Day. It is a day of anticipation, hope and, of course, potential Commentary bragging rights. When Major League Baseball starts their season, every fan has their eyes on Jonathan Auping their favorite team’s scores. The season is long. Each team will suffer some losing streaks and a few injuries, but if your team manages to get a win on day one then that means they are still perfect, and for whatever reason, everything just seems right. Opening Day is always exciting, but it is a whole different experience at Saint Louis University. St. Louis prides itself on being a great baseball town. However, that is not the only thing that raises the excitement. The SLU community comes from all over the United States, so many of those students bring their team allegiances with them to college. Take a look around on March 31 as you are walking around campus. You will be sure to see students representing their teams from Chicago, Texas, Kansas City and many other places. Baseball brings about a sense of pride that transcends just the sport. On Opening Day, people are really be proud of where they are from. It also brings many people together. Two students, regardless of year or major, will come together to root for their team and seek the bragging rights over the rest of their peers. Yet still, baseball can encourage a level of individualization. See “Opening Day” on page 10
Men’s Soccer
SLU alum dazzles in National Team performance By DERRICK NEUNER Associate Sports Editor
L 3-2 @ SIU-Carbondale
L 5-1 @ SIU Carbondale Baseball
6-5
vs. Evansville Men’s Tennis
L
R
Think back to the first time that you told someone you attend Saint Louis University. Chatter about how you like the school and other pleasantries probably followed. Inevitably, an exchange along these lines would take place: “What is your school mascot?” “A Billiken.” “What’s a Billiken.” “Um…” Mascots are a source of pride, a fixture of a university’s athletic department and culture. When someone thinks of a mascot, however, it is likely that an intimidating animal or some mythological figure springs to mind, not a winking imp-like creature. So how did we come to be the Billikens, and, frankly, what is a Billiken? More importantly, what does a pudgy goblin have to do with our athletic teams? Before SLU came to be known as the Billikens, they had no nickname; they were simply called the Blue and Whites, according to Pius XII Library head archivist John Waide. The team jerseys featured only the letters S and L intertwined. “Back then, mascots and team names were not really that big of a deal, certainly not as much as they are today,” Waide said. There is some debate as to the exact story of how our University became associated with the Billiken, but in each tale, there is one recurring character: Football coach John Bender. St. Louis Post-Dispatch sports writer Wil-
liam O’ Connor was in attendance at a football practice during the 1911 season covering SLU’s team. O’ Connor observed that “things were as they should be” with the team, a phrase associated with the meaning of the Billiken. The phrase, coupled with coach Bender’s Billiken-esque broad grin, caused O’Connor to exclaim, “Why, that guy’s a familiar Billiken!” The football team became known as “Bender’s Billikens,” and the rest is history. The Billiken itself is seen as a symbol of good luck. So how does that stack up against a vicious tiger? The originality of the mascot and the tradition associated with it outweighs any losses from having an imposing mascot. Sophomore Tim Clavin believes that a unique mascot sets us apart from the clichés found in most college mascots. “I think we stand out over other colleges who have the typical mascot like the “Spiders” or the “Hawks,” just to name a few. I think that gives us the edge. No matter how hard people may try, there is only one Billiken and that is at SLU. I would not change a damn thing,” he said. Sophomore Cody Ellis, a member of the men’s basketball team, thinks the Billiken adds to SLU’s athletic tradition. “I like the mascot because it is so unique, and I love unique,” sophomore basketball team member Cody Ellis said. The Billiken is just one of many things that set SLU apart from universities across the country. Deeply entrenched in history, the 102-year-old mascot brings an identity to our community and athletics.
MLB
Tim Ream’s strong play against Paraguay has experts’ attention
R
W
SLU finished 5-1 in union play, losing only to rival Mizzou.
R
1970s-1980s
On March 30, the Billikens dropped both games in a doubleheader against the Southern Illinois Salukis. SLU dropped the first contest 3-2 and the second 5-1, dropping their record to 19-14 on the season. Senior Kristin Nicoletti extended her career-high hitting streak to 12 games in the series, hitting a single in both contests.
Leda Riley/ Photographer
See “Rugby” on page 10
Billiken gives SLU an identity
R
Softball
country. SLU, however, was prepared for the rematch in the spring. They showed no mercy, destroying Missouri 46-10. The match was tied 1010 at the half. Rugby team president Joe Andreoni, a junior, attributed the lopsided result to the team’s focus and experience. “It is a pretty intense rivalry. We pretty much ran over them. We played a tougher preseason schedule, playing high-caliber teams, and it gave us more focus, and we have intense practices. That allows us to come back when our backs are against the
Featured Story
Swimming & Diving Senior swimmer Michael Dahle has continued his academic and athletic excellence, earning a third straight Atlantic 10 All-Academic team selection. Dahle, an investigative medical science major, has been selected to the A-10 Commissioner’s Academic Honor Roll every semester. Dahle posted 14 victories this season, finishing sixth in the 400 IM at the A-10 championships.
ranked in the Premier League division. Consistently challenging themselves during the fall has paid dividends for SLUin the spring portion of their season. During the spring, they competed against teams from their union, or conference, such as Missouri, Washington University in St. Louis, Principia and Missouri A&M. SLU finished 5-1 in union play, winning their union. However, they suffered their first loss in union play since 2007 against archrival Mizzou by a score of 20-15 this past fall. Losing to the Tigers would be acceptable for some other programs, seeing as they are consistently a top team in the
2-7
@ McKendree University
Former Saint Louis University Billiken soccer star Tim Ream earned rave reviews for his performance with the United States National Team on Tuesday, March 29, in Nashville, Tenn., ahead of the 2011 Gold Cup. Ream played all 90 minutes in front of a record 29,000 fans at LP Field, home of the Tennessee Titans. Throughout the contest, the Paraguayans maintained control of the ball, but were unable to break through a defense led by Ream. The defense held Paraguay to only five shots on goal in the contest. This marks the first occasion that Ream, who plays for the MLS’ New York Red Bulls, started for the national team. “When you can get out
there and play with what amounts to the ‘A-Team,’ guys that played in the 2010 World Cup, it gives you a good opportunity to see where you’re at [with your game] and what you have to work on,” Ream said. “The way I play out of the back is one of my strengths, so to be able to alleviate the pressure on the defense, that’s something coaches are looking for now.” Soccer America, ESPN. com and Sports Illustrated all praised Ream’s play. ESPN said, “Belying his mere 23 years and inexperience once more, Ream was his usual cool and composed self, no matter how much pressure he was put under … Ream showed that he is good enough to be a starter for the U.S. as of now.” ESPN was not the only major media outlet to offer eam high praise. Livesoccertv. com, a premier international
soccer website, called Ream’s performance “impressive” and cited him as a feature piece of the American defensive line. Ream said that he thought his play put forward a strong case for his selection to the 2011 Gold Cup national team; though he admitted he still has aspects of his game to work on. He also remarked about what it meant to wear the Stars and Stripes. “Every kid’s dream is to represent their country in whatever sport they play,” he said. “To be able to put on a jersey and listen to the anthem in front of a crowd like that, it gives you goose bumps, gets you excited, pumps you up; it’s a feeling hard to come by anywhere else.” The Americans have one last tune-up match before the CONCAF Gold Cup against the defending world champions, Spain, on June 4.
Ryan Giacomino / Photographer
Ream, a former All-American here at SLU, is making a name for himself in the international game withTeam USA.
Sports
10
unewsonline.com
Thursday, March 31, 2011 NCAA Final Four
Rugby: Regional dominance continues A fairytale Final Four
Leda Riley / Photographer
The SLU rugby team attempts to gain possession via a line-out, a form of an inbounds play in Rugby. During a line-out, teammates can lift each other to gain an advantage. The Billikens continue their season the weekend of April 16. Continued from Page 9
wall,” he said. Winning their union qualified SLU for the West regional, a four-team tournament in which the top two teams move on to the national tournament. SLU won their two games at the regional, defeating the Arkansas Razorbacks and the Rice Owls to ensure their third straight trip to the Sweet 16 of the national tournament. SLU knocked off the Razorbacks by a score of 34-21 to lock up a spot in the Sweet 16. Their game against Rice was simply for bragging rights and seeding. However, as a team that takes every single minute of every single match seriously, SLU went full-force against the Owls, winning by a 23-12 margin. In the Sweet 16, SLU can potentially face Rice in a rematch. The tournament progress-
es much like the NCAA Basketball tournament, with the winner advancing each round in a single-elimination format. SLU can attribute much of their success to a trio of seniors who provide a wealth of leadership and experience. Billy Andrakakos, Matt Strohm, and Kelly Mercer all bring talent and a strong pedigree from their high school programs to the SLU team. Mercer and Andrakakos are currently captains of the team, and Strohm captained the team his sophomore year. When Strohm studied abroad in England, his play earned him a spot on the prestigious London Wasps rugby club. The team does not recruit high school players per se, but current players build connections with rugby players at their alma maters. “A contingent of our players come from places like Marquette High (Milwaulkee), De Smet (St. Louis) and
SLU High (St. Louis” Andreoni said. “All their high school teams were in running for the national championship.” Despite the successes the team has had up to this point in the season, the team realizes that they have things to work on if they wish to capture an elusive National Championship trophy. “Fitness is always an issue,” Andreoni said, “and we need to start better. We were tied up 10-10 against Mizzou at the half but ended up blowing them out. We need to turn it on in the first half instead of when we are down by two or tied. We need to come out firing.” There are plenty of positive for SLU to draw off of heading to San Diego. One thing that the team does do well is work extremely hard in the days building up to games. With two games a weekend during Nationals, the team understands the need
Opening Day: All fans can find hope Continued from Page 9
“I walk around and see all the Cubs and Cardinals shirts, and I’m proud to be wearing my Rockies shirt. I always liked that I come from somewhere sort of unique to SLU. It’s cool to be one of the few people here rooting for my team,” junior Colorado native, Jesse Hassell said. Much of the intensity of Opening Day revolves around the famous Cardinals-Cubs rivalry. With a large portion of the student body coming from either St. Louis or Chicago,
there is certainly going to be contingents of fans trash talking their rivals. SLU serves as a hosting place for the bitter rivalry. “I check the Cub’s score every day, but to be honest, I usually check the Cardinals score second. It’s always nice to get a win on the same day the Cards lose,” senior Chicago native and Cubs fan Jesse Merdian said. On Opening Day, there is a refreshing feeling of hope, even for the lowest of teams. The guarantee of a new season leaves open any and all possibilties. Anything can happen in
baseball. “Even though we’ve struggled recently, every year on Opening Day I have hope that the Indians can succeed, especially since the Central Division isn’t usually very strong,” junior Cleveland native Donnie Green said. Yankee great Joe DiMaggio once said, “You always get a special kick out of Opening Day. You look forward to it like a birthday party when you’re a kid. You think something wonderful is going to happen.” Who knows, maybe we should live everyday like it is Opening Day.
THIS SUMMER MEET YOUR PERFECT MATCH ONLINE. American History. Criminology. Nature of Mathematics. Marquette offers more online courses than ever before, and our accelerated summer schedule makes it easy to knock out a few credits while making the most of the sunshine. Prefer face-to-face contact? Try one of our hundreds of other summer courses. Don’t wait — classes fill up fast. Register now. Go to marquette.edu/summer or call 414.288.7302.
to perform at a high level on short rest. To prepare for Regionals, they practiced every day of the week leading up to their travel day. It worked: They won both. “I think how everyone has stepped it up coming out of last semester has been great,” Andreoni said. “The Mizzou loss was a wake up call, and it allowed us to focus on playing our opponents tougher.” Typically, the team would only practice two times a week during the season. The practices would lead up to games on the weekends. The captains of the team would have an extra practice to ensure that they would be at peak performance heading into matches. SLU, currently ranked as the fourth best team in the country, faces the winner of the Southern Pacific union the weekend of April 16 in San Diego. If they win their two games in San Diego, they advance to the national semifinals in Pittsburgh.
Apparently, Taylor Swift does want to date me, Hogwarts does exist and in 25 years I will be Commentary President of the United States. No, I’m not crazy. Just look at this year’s N C A A m e n ’ s Derrick Neuner basketball Final Four. Obviously dreams do come true. Thanks to Virginia Commonwealth and Butler, someone is laughing all the way to the bank. Oh, yeah, Shaka Smart and Brad Stevens. One of them will be going to the national championship to face either John Calipari or Jim Calhoun. Congratulations, gentleman. I’m sure it will be a dream come true. If anything has been consistent in the 2011 NCAA Tournament, it’s been inconsistency. Someone should have told Bill Self that the No.1 in front of his Kansas Jayhawks meant nothing to anyone but the record book. Rock chalk busted brackets and busted dreams. Before we continue, let’s talk about Shaka Smart and the VCU Rams. How could this squad, which, may I remind you, tipped off against our Billikens last year in the College Basketball Invitational, make it all the way to the Final Four? The 2010-11 Rams are almost a mirror image of the 2009-10 Rams who defeated the Blils. Folks, this is the stuff of dreams. Of course, a Final Four match-up of Butler and VCU isn’t exactly a dream game for executives at CBS who want big ratings, but then again, Cinderella didn’t wear tennis shoes, now did she? As the saying goes, “This is why you play the game.” And play the No. 8 Butler Bulldogs did. They knocked off No. 1 Pittsburgh with less than a second on the clock, beat No. 4 Wisconsin to advance to No. 2 Florida and take on No. 11
VCU on Saturday, April 1, in Houston. Butler head coach Brad Stevens, 34, is going to his second Final Four. That’s one more than SLU’s head coach Rick Majerus, who has almost 500 career victories. Stevens was just four when Majerus began coaching at Marquette. Now he is headed to his second consecutive Final Four and has a chance to win it all after last year’s heartbreaking loss against Duke in Detroit. I had a dream that all the No. 1 seeds would advance to the Final Four. It was called my bracket. It was published for all to see last week. Not a single one remains. I guess March Madness made me an April fool. For UConn head coach Jim Calhoun, this, his fourth Final Four, erases the nightmare of sanctions casted by the NCAA earlier this season. After missing the Dance altogether last year, the Fighting Kemba Walkers, I mean, Huskies have returned to what must feel like a dream. And let’s not forget John Calipari. On second thought, keep dreaming Coach Cal. Just wait 36 months, and this Final Four will be just a dream, too. The reality is the 2011 Final Four is open for any team’s taking. Regardless of the outcomes of the games this weekend, it will be legend versus newborn. Connecticut and Kentucky represent two of the finest and most historical programs in all of collegiate basketball, while up-and-comers Butler and VCU give us all a reminder that, even in the face of the highest odds, dreams do persevere. So Ms. Swift, you belong with me. Baby, just say yes. Professor Dumbledore, I’ll be waiting for my owl. And I promise not to tell my Muggle friends. And Mr. Obama, sir, take care of the House. I believe the St. Louis Cardinals will be coming to visiting you in a few months. Albert Pujols needs a desk to sign his new contract on. Hey, a guy can dream, right?
unewsonline.com
Advertisement Thursday, March 31, 2011
11
Advertisements from Student Development
12
unewsonline.com
Thursday, March 31, 2011
WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
Last Lecture Series You spoke…We listened
WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
Dr. Martha Shockey– Eckles Assistant Professor of Sociology and Criminal Justice
Security Desk Workers
“If you knew this was your last lecture you would ever give, what would you share with students?”
o $7.25 per hour. Minimum 20 hours per week*
Office Assistants
o $7.25 per hour. Minimum 20 hours per week*
Conference and Lead Conference Assistants o Stipend
Furniture Crew
Monday, April 18, 2011 7:00 pm BSC, Room 170
o $8.25 per hour, up to 40 hours!
All students, staff, and faculty are welcome to attend. This program is supported by the offices of the Vice President, Frost and Vice President, Health Sciences and the Division of Student Development
Conference Laundry Workers o $8 per hour, up to 40 hours!
Apply on Careerlink! Questions email ehudnall@slu.edu
WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
Pizza & Money: Financial Survival 101
SelectRoom access times, floor plans, and screenshots for Fall 2011 housing have been posted to the main page of the Housing and Residence Life Website! Online SelectRoom Access Dates: Juniors and Seniors: April 4 & 5, 2011 Sophomores: April 8 & 11, 2011 Mutually requested roommates should select at the earliest group member/mutually requested roommate’s access time. Late applicants are welcome and will be contacted following the SelectRoom Process.
Why is a 401K important? Do you know about insurance? Ready to payback student loans?
All questions should be directed to the Department of Housing and Residence Life at 314-977-2811 or reslife@slu.edu
FREE PIZZA! WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
Fall 2011 Room Selection Important Reminders:
WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
*hourly requirement for summer housing
WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
WE ARE ALL BILLIKENS
Selected by student nominations