UT Magazine 9/23

Magazine

September 18th, 2023

STARTING COLLEGE

The cascading overwhelm of emotions surrounding beginning college and the slow transition into adulthood.

ART OR PORN?

The influence of the male gaze and its blurring of the line between art and pornography.

Trinity’s Improv group, ‘Improv She Wrote’, visit the Edinburgh Fringe Festival.

ARTS GIRL, STEM BOY

An investigation into the puzzling paradigm of STEM boys dating arts girls.

CONVERSATIONS WITH MUSICIANS

Conor Thornton dishes on his inspiration and new single.

SALAD OR SANDWICH...?

Change your way of looking at things by seeing life through the ‘salad or sandwich’ paradigm.

SEX IN THE CITY

An anonymous writer explains the do’s and don’t of dating in the city.

“SILLY” & “CAMP”

Maria Altenrath

Cleo Daly

Matthew Keely

Cleo Daly

Emma Fitzpatrick

Emma Fitzpatrick

NAME: Cleo Daly

AGE: 21 — can enter Workman’s at all hours

HEIGHT: 173cm, or at least that’s what my dating profile says

COURSE: 3rd year of English Studies and still haven’t read a book

HAIR COLOUR: currently blonde — it changes every term

OCCUPATION: arriving an hour early to lectures so that can I show off my little outfit that I spent all week planning

HOBBIES: writing questionable articles, playing the sims and pretending that I enjoy socialising

MUSIC TASTE: everything they don’t play at Workman’s

FEARS: high ceilings, taxidermy and becoming a lecturer

DREAMS: being both employed and and arts student

CAN BE FOUND: in the library (mainly the Lecky, however I do occasionally get dragged to the Ussher); on Bumble, but don’t go near me as I can’t respond to text messages; and in the bar that I have already mentioned twice

HOTEL: Trivago

It’s the start of a new academic year, and with that comes opportunities, decisions and excitement. Opportunities to hook up with someone in your course, and then end up in the same group for your tutorial project the following morning. Decisions about whether or not it’s too late to drop out, but deciding to prolong the unemployment for another year or two. And of course the excitement that comes with picking up your new copy of The University Times, in particular the Magazine with its two new lovely editors (modesty is boring). For this first edition of the Magazine, we are presenting you with an array of writers, articles and writing styles. Our theme for this month was greatness, great writers and great articles, or perhaps we just couldn’t pinpoint a theme

and giving everyone a pat on the back seemed like the better option. As it is Freshers’ Week (no, those bright, slightly lost, young faces weren’t just an influx of tourists), we’re starting this edition off with an article by Maria Altenrath, on the trials and tribulations one faces when transitioning from secondary school to college. Whether you’re a first year student looking for some stellar advice on how to tackle the big change, or a student well into a degree, looking to take a trip down memory lane, this article has something to offer for everyone. Next up is an article by yours truly (Cleo Daly, in case you don’t make it to the end of this), on the depiction of women in the fashion industry, and what message it carries across to young people in our society. After this we have Matthew Keeley’s weird and wonderful piece on his time performing improv at the Edinburgh Fringe, an uplifting article that showcases the artistic talents of our Trinity students. Speaking of talented Trinity students, the mysterious ways of the male STEM community is revealed in another article by me (I swear it’s good and I

NAME: Emma Fitzpatrick

AGE: 20

COURSE: Deaf Studies

didn’t just stick it in because I could). If you’re looking to find the answer to the ageold question of how STEM boys continue to bag the stunning women of the arts block, then look no further as this read will both inform and possibly offend you. Next up is a piece from my wonderful co-editor Emma Fitzpatrick. Emma interviews Conor Thornton on what it’s like to be a musician, and what one might expect to experience when heading down such a path. This article offers hope for those interested in joining the music scene, as well as for those who have switched academic courses in the hopes of achieving their dreams. Then, the one and only Emma Fitzpatrick is back to ask the real questions. Salad or sandwich? If you don’t know what that means then I guess you better go find out. And if you do know what I’m referencing, then go read it anyway because it will most certainly make you laugh, and maybe even cry a little (or perhaps that was just me). But enough about what I think about the articles, it’s up to you now to find out what these pieces are all about. So what are you waiting for? Turn the page over already!

INTRO: I’ve had a large attachment to and love for writing since I was very young and unable to write in between the lines properly. I would try so hard to fill up shorthand notebooks my dad would give me with all my little stories and thoughts, plays and ideas alike. It was a joy within a safety net I found in myself, and growing up it became more and more centred in my little world. I remember struggling to understand and connect to who I was and learning to accept the way I thought, created and understood the world was difficult, but through writing it felt worthwhile and made it all clearer to me. As I went through my first few semesters in college and changed my hair enough to create a running joke, writing was more prominent in my life than ever before, and joining the team in UT and working in the magazine has been the experience I always needed when I was younger, and hopefully will be continued in this years editions of the magazine. When I write I try my hardest to give this section of my head out for people to come in and sit down comfortably, and what UT Magazine produces and publishes is truly made for your enjoyment each time we publish an edition.

starting college

Acouple of years ago, I wrote down that the thought of being a teenager felt like falling down a waterfall. Though I have never actually fallen down a waterfall — if I had, I would probably not be writing this — I considered that this image was really fitting for many of the feelings I experienced in the middle of my teenage years. Now I am in my last year of being a teenager, and I still believe that the image of a waterfall fits perfectly with what I have been feeling and experiencing in my first year of college. I am still falling, sometimes feeling like I am flying, sometimes swept away by the floods of emotions.

Going to college comes with a lot of changes in your personal life. It is kind of like your secondary school life is tossed over, like the dice are reshuffled. New doors open, you have the freedom to create your own path in life. That can be super exciting. Some students look forward to finishing secondary school for years before graduating. I was one of these students. I could not wait to leave my hometown and study abroad. However, when I think back to my first few weeks of college, I remember writing my first ever essay on how overwhelmed I was. But I was not the only one who felt that way.

I sat down with Alicja “Ala”

Wojciechowska, to ask her some questions in relation to her experience of transitioning from secondary school to college. I asked if she had felt overwhelmed during her first week of college and she explained that her “first week of college was definitely slightly more overwhelming than [she] expected”. She continued, “in the summer, while waiting for

that helped her find her way around during Freshers’ Week, as she explained: “The course meetings where I met some of my lecturers and heard about the classes I would be taking in the upcoming year helped greatly, but they also scared me as I realised that a lot of work and study would be required to pass all of my classes. However, I also made sure to find time in

the very first week meant that I could allow myself to focus on adjusting to my new routine and focus on coursework, instead of feeling overly anxious about university”.

What helped her adjust to her new daily routine and schedule was planning out her week in advance and “having a set time for studying in the library or meeting friends.” This also stopped her from “feeling overwhelmed with the amount of assignments and study.” Moreover, she added, “asking for advice from friends in the year above who experienced the same situation as me before aided me quite a bit in adjusting to my new life at Trinity.”

leaving cert offers and results, I was excited about the prospect of studying here. However … I was not prepared for Trinity and its thousands of students and tourists roaming campus daily.”

Furthermore, she said that she felt quite anxious wondering if she would fit in, find any friends and “truly belong at Trinity”. Nevertheless, there were events

the first week to attend freshers’ events and socialise with people, which helped to ease these feelings.”

To the question of whether she would describe this overwhelming feeling as rather good, bad, or both Wojciechowska said, “I think these feelings of anxiety and nervousness were good in the end. Allowing myself to feel those emotions in

Not being able to make friends in college is another fear many students have. I discussed with Wojchiechowska how to make friends and integrate into the college community and she informed me that, “at the beginning of university, I definitely found the initial Student2Student (S2S) mentor meet-up helpful as it was an opportunity to meet and socialise with people in my course, and also helped me to make two good friends … whom I’m still close to today. Freshers’ events, and making sure to attend as many of them as possible, also played a key role in helping me to integrate by allowing me to explore my interests and to meet peo-

Maria Altenrath paints the canvas of beginning college, where the cascade of emotions and experiences include initial overwhelm, but transition into exhilaration and heartfelt gratitude.

“I am still falling, sometimes feeling like I am flying, sometimes swept away by floods of emotions.

ple with similar passions, ideas and motivations as me. Once lectures and the academic year officially started, I found that simply attending society events and striking up conversations with people in my tutorials and lectures helped me to make new friends”.

If she had to describe her college experience so far in three words, Wojciechowska would say it was “joyful, stressful and enjoyable”, which shows that college can indeed be overwhelming and demanding, and that this is normal, but that it can also be gratifying and very much enjoyable.

For me, going to college

new things, and hopefully gain new hobbies. College gifts you with so much more knowledge, so many nice people and so many sparkling moments that will turn into golden memories.

My advice would be to go to events, smile at strangers and talk to those who smile back at you. This is how I managed to make a great friend on my first day of orientation week, someone who I am still in touch with one year later. Societies, publications and sports clubs can also be great places to meet nice people who share your interests and, as Wojciechowska said, you can also meet people

meant leaving my hometown, leaving my family and friends and not being able to see them daily, like I did in secondary school. One thing I probably missed the most was being able to hug them. Moreover, being in a completely new place you have never been before and where you do not know what hides behind the next corner, having hundreds of people around you that you have never seen before, doing something you have never done before can be overwhelming at first. Nevertheless, it can also be quite exciting to meet new people who might become your best friends, to find out what hides behind every corner, to discover your new favourite place to study or the best spot for coffee. With a wide range of events to go to, you will learn so many

in lecture halls or tutorials, which is where I met one of my best friends last semester. Occasionally, it might still feel like you are falling down a waterfall — torn down by insecurities, not knowing what might happen next, soaked by exciting new experiences and emotions happening all at once, leaving behind a part of your life. But then again, you will feel the freedom of flying, admire the small little water particles glittering golden in the sun, get closer to the end of your teenage years where you might reach a lake or river of settlement that will guide you forward. However, I cannot tell you for sure, since I have not reached the end of my waterfall yet. I am still enjoying the flight. I hope you do too — down your own beautiful waterfall.

“You will feel the freedom of flying, admire the small little water particles glittering golden in the sun . . .

PHOTO BY ISABEL FARRINGTON

art or porn..?

Cleo Daly explores the blurred line between art and pornography in the fashion industry, highlighting how the influence of the male gaze raises questions about the industry’s true nature and its impact on women’s empowerment.

It is the beginning of July. I am standing in the middle of the Armani/Silos museum in Milan. I am stuck staring at the framed photograph in front of me. My cousins have overlapped me twice at this stage, likely wondering if I’m contemplating shoving the photo into my already overweight hand luggage. The image is of a woman bent over the arm of a couch, with her back arched and her dress gathered around her pelvis revealing a garter belt. Her face depicts pleasure, with flushed cheeks, closed eyes and her mouth slightly ajar. On the floor, between her feet, rests a large picture of John Travolta, making it quite clear what the piece depicting. I’m not amazed by the photograph, I’m not in awe, nor am I uncomfortable. I’m just confused. Is this art or porn?

When a woman takes naked photos of herself, she is often shamed for doing so. She is seen as ‘easy’, ‘cheap’, or without self respect. But when a man takes photos of a naked woman, it’s suddenly art? Fashion photographer Guy Bourdin seemed to think so, as many of his photographs were centred around naked women. You could argue that the body

is a form of art, however, when every single body displayed is that of one type — slim, flawless and female — some might question what exactly Bourdin wished to depict. Another picture which caught my attention was one of a woman’s bare buttocks. It wasn’t so much the nudity that I found memorable, but rather the fact that no other part of the model was visible, as the rest of her body was hidden under a bed. It was simply a picture of her bottom and stocking-covered legs. I’m not sure what sort of feelings Bourdin wished to invoke within his female audience, but I would guess that empowerment was not one of them.

As I wandered through the display of breasts and buttocks, I was reminded of a conversation I previously had with my cousins about OnlyFans. Both buyers and sellers on OnlyFans face much stigma. Content creators, of whom 70 per cent are women, are often viewed as selling their dignity, and yet I couldn’t see much difference between Bourdin’s work and what I imagine OnlyFans to look like. So where do we draw the line — what exactly separates porn from art? You could argue that it’s the intention be-

hind the piece that defines its nature, but what exactly is the intention of having the bodies of women so visible in fashion?

The more attractive the model, the more attractive the clothing. Brands make us believe that if we wear such items of clothing then we too will look as beautiful as the models that wear them. But why would we want to look like the models? Oh yes, because society has decided that such appearances are beautiful and anything different is unattractive. And what’s wrong with being unattractive? Oh yes, no man would want you, you will never marry, never have children and then you will have failed as a woman. Because according to society that’s the purpose of women, to reproduce, and to be considered attractive by men. What a life it is, constantly living under the scrutiny of the male gaze…

The museum continued on

with several floors of pieces from Giorgio Armani’s collections, and then finally we were invited to sit and watch quite a long video showcasing even more of Armani’s work. One section of the video was of Armani and models from one of his countless runway shows. I vividly remember the image of the short, white-haired man standing in the centre of a long row of beautiful, slim women with their arms around him. They’re thanking him for making them so beautiful, for dressing them in such an eye-catching way. He’s nodding along, proud of what he’s created, proud of his models, proud of his art. I couldn’t help but notice how exposed their bodies were, how similar all of these exposed bodies were. It didn’t sit right with me. This idea of men dressing women in clothing that makes them ‘attractive’, ‘eye-catching’, ‘appealing’,

“What a life it is, constantly living under the scrutiny of the male gaze.

and then being rewarded for such.

Many would argue that a woman being able to show off her body is a form of empowerment, a chance to fight against the strict dress codes forced upon women. And to a certain extent I would agree. However, when a woman is being forced to reveal her body, this empowerment becomes harassment. The fashion industry is no stranger to pressuring young women into nudity, both in shoots and on the runway. Brazilian model Gisele Bündchen writes in her autobiography ‘Lessons: My Path to a Meaningful Life’ about walking the 1988 Alexander McQueen show, and how she was forced to go out topless. Bünchen, who was only eighteen at the time, was informed that she would only be wearing a fishtail skirt and nothing else. Bundchen sobbed at the news, and nearly ran away from the job. Her family were in the audience, and she states that “I was a girl gripped

At the 2017 Web Summit in Lisbon, Portuguese model Sara Sampaio discussed how she was continuously pressured into stripping naked for fashion shoots, and how many photos that she is uncomfortable with have been published without her consent. Even with a career as successful as Sampaio’s, she stated that she continued to be bullied into posing for shoots that she is unhappy with, and her upset is brushed off with comments such as “oh that’s just part of the business”. A business which Sampaio says forces underage girls to do “topless photos, underage girls being sexualised very early and even older girls being bullied into getting naked”. Sampaio had agreed to a no-nudity contract with French men’s magazine Lui, but she was pressured to strip, and multiple photos that she was unhappy with were ‘accidentally’ published. Sampaio reveals that, “one of those accidents was on the cover and one was inside with the story.

2001, stating that he used his influence to sexually exploit models during photoshoots, and coerced them to engage in sexual acts with him. The claims made against him iincluded sexual assault against minors, and forcing models into engaging in sexual acts with his friends, all while being photographed. Sixteen years after the accusations first began, top magazines and brands such as Marie Claire, Diesel and Valentino all stated that they would

fit more than three fingers in. Likewise, I believe that no one understands men better than men. They know what they want, what it is they desire. So, to put it simply, if a man designs clothes for women, is he not doing it with the desires of men in mind? Is he not aiming to design clothing that will be ‘flattering’, that will make a woman not only look ‘attractive’ but also ‘feel attractive’? The male gaze, I believe, is a big shaper of the fashion industry, and the

by the fear that my family would feel so embarrassed they would never speak to me again. I was terrified”. Thankfully a make-up artist by the name Val painted a white top onto Bündchen, who then continued on with the show. How anyone could justify forcing a teenager to appear topless in front of her family for the sake of ‘fashion’ is beyond me, and yet all McQueen received was praise for his wonderful contribution to the dressing of the female body.

And I felt very hurt because for me, the one time that I made sure this was not going to happen, they still did it”. Sampaio mentioned the famous fashion photographer Terry Richardson, who has been blacklisted within the industry for allegedly sexually assaulting models. She states that, “everyone knew about Terry Richardson and all these people looked the other way and kept working with him”. Accusations against Richardson first began surfacing in

no longer be working with Richardson. American Vogue stopped working with Richardson 2010, however, he has since done shoots with Vogue France and Vogue China. Richardson has never been faced with criminal charges.

The Aerospace and Finance industries have more female CEOs than the fashion industry. Women make up over 85% of graduating majors from top fashion schools, and one in six of those employed by the global fashion industry are female. Yet only 14 per cent of the top fifty major fashion brands are run by women as of 2018. Men spend 226 per cent less money than women on clothes, so why is it that they hold the power in regards to running the fashion houses? I believe that no one understands women better than women. No one else will understand the desire of many women for clothes to not only be beautiful but to also be practical, comfortable and to have some pockets that you can

art of fashion acts in some ways as another platform for entertaining men. Some believe that sites such as OnlyFans are damaging for women, in particular the mindsets of young women and how they view themselves. But what about the fashion industry? What has fashion told young women? That we must be a certain weight, a certain size? That showing more skin makes us more attractive, more appealing? That we should let men dictate our appearances?

Some people argue that porn itself is an art form, and artistic creation. I would not be one of those people. Porn spreads disinformation, sets unrealistic standards, and gives impressionable young men the false belief that women are there to satisfy their needs. On reflection, how different is the fashion industry? Both industries are plagued by the male gaze. But then, again where isn’t? So what exactly can we call the fashion industry? Art or porn?

“I couldn’t help but notice how exposed their bodies were, how similar all of these exposed bodies were.

“silly” &“camp” 8

Matthew Keeley reveals the excitement, challenges and camaraderie encountered by Trinity’s best (and only) improv group as they navigated the world’s largest theatre festival.

I’ll be honest, I can’t picture it either: former Trinity College Dublin Students’ Union (TCDSU) President, Gabi Fullam; TCDSU and Players hack, Jenny Maguire and – worst of all – a business student, all in an improv comedy group together? It sounds like the start of a bad joke, or a bad Players show. But alack, such a dastardly thing exists and I have the pleasure of being the aforementioned business student in said improv group, which calls itself… ‘Improv She Wrote’. Yeah. I know. We didn’t come up with the name, something we often mention at our shows. Another thing we like to bring up at our shows is the fact that we are Trinity College’s best (and only) improv group, a claim we proudly brandished on our Wizard of Oz-themed flyers at the Edinburgh Fringe

Festival this year. Why Wizard of Oz-themed, you ask? I posed this very question to Jenny after

she designed them, to which she replied it was “silly and camp”.

Silly and camp is a good way to describe our experience at the Fringe. ‘Improv She Wrote’ has performed at the festival for several years now, with many different lineups. Jenny and Gabi were well accustomed to the Fringe buzz upon arrival in Edinburgh. I was a complete Fringe virgin, as were fellow members Loulou, Mia and Nia. We were utterly blown away by the enormity of it all. The entire city of Edinburgh is

taken over by spectacles and performances, cabarets and comedies, stand-ups and street performers, all under a shower of flyers promoting a flurry of different shows. The largest theatre festival in the world! I was in awe. I wanted to go to everything, immediately. Our morning routine normally consisted of waking up in the improv apartment, eating whatever takeaway was left over from the previous night for breakfast and then hopping on the bus to the city centre in search of some free

“Lying straight to their faces, telling them it would be be the greatest show they’d ever seen in their lives.

PHOTO BY MAEVE SHEEHAN

shows. The Royal Mile was always crammed with crowds of theatregoers ready to enjoy the day’s performances. Many a young entrepreneurial Scotsman could be found dressed in a kilt and tweed, playing the bagpipes and being handsomely renumerated by flocks of tourists. Every space in the city seemed to turn into a stage. We saw shows at the back of coffee shops, upstairs in pubs and in the basement of a burrito shop called ‘Burritos ‘n Shake’ –where ‘Improv She Wrote’ performed the previous year, their performance intermittently interrupted by staff workers walking across the stage to get to the stockroom.

This year, however, we would be performing in a BrewDog pub on Lothian Road, a far more glamorous location. BrewDog, for those who are unaware, is a chain of pubs that almost exclusively sells exorbitantly priced IPAs. However, they also allow dogs, so they’re not all bad! They also let us stage an improv comedy show for a week, so there’s that too.

Our show was on at 9.35pm every night, which gave us plenty of time during the day to bother and harass the kind people of Edinburgh with our flyers, lying straight to their faces and telling them that it would be the greatest show they’d ever seen in their lives. Jenny’s approach to flyering was to drop them into people’s hands, say ‘I’m very beautiful’ and then walk away. You can imagine how successful that tactic was.

Nonetheless, a crowd of unassuming and unprepared individuals would find themselves each night sitting upstairs in a small glass room in BrewDog, Lothian Road, ready to be subjected to the best free, amateur, collegiate improv there is! A stand-up comedian revealed to us at a show early in the week that the average

on stage one night to help with one of our games. Then, alas, the roster changed and Nia performed her last ever show with us before leaving for New York, undoubtedly moving on to bigger and better things. Mia departed too, also for the US but only on Erasmus so she will soon return to ‘prov once more. Gabi arrived midway through the week from Fiji, her dedication to improv not impeded by the thousands of kilometres needed to travel to perform with the troupe

After finishing our shows at around half ten every night, we would wander through the city in search of a pint or a show, or often both. The fireworks from the castle would serenade us at eleven o’clock and fill up the Edinburgh sky with bright lights to complement the warm hues of the bustling pubs and bars.

audience size for an Edinburgh Free Fringe show was 3. 3! With that in mind, we were more than happy with the throngs of people who came to our show. When we gazed out into the audience and saw more than 20 people, we knew we had made it big.

For the first few shows, the improv ensemble was myself, Jenny, Loulou, Mia and Nia. Éle Ní Chonbhuí, a good friend of ‘Improv She Wrote’, also joined us

I have to admit, it didn’t quite sink in at the time, but as I reflect upon it all now, I can scarcely believe myself when I say the words out loud: I performed at the Edinburgh Fringe. I performed at the Edinburgh Fringe with some of my best friends, putting on a silly little improv show and making people laugh and smile every night. What a thing to be able to say. I know it might not mean much to others, but I never ever thought I would have the opportunity to say those words, to have the experience I did and to have made such incredible memories.

“

We were utterly blown away by the enormity of it all. The entire city of Edinburgh is taken over by spectacles and performances, cabarets and comedies, standups and street performers . . . The largest theatre festival in the world! I was in awe. I wanted to go to everything, immediately.

PHOTO BY JANE BARLOW

PHOTO BY MAEVE SHEEHAN

arts girl stem boy

Cleo Daly explores the mystery that has puzzled generations of Trinity students: the arts girl, STEM boy paradigm.

Ibegan my academic year in the same way any dedicated scholar might: by loitering outside the arts block in the hopes of spotting attractive individuals. I even expanded this loitering to the STEM section of campus, as well as Trinity’s many libraries. But don’t be mistaken, this idleness was in no way self-driven, the bathroom mirrors are much more convenient for staring at elegance. I was on a quest to solve one of life’s big questions… How do these STEM boys keep bagging arts girls?

The obvious answer would be gender. STEM is lacking in women, arts is lacking in men and therefore it’s a matter of self-preservation and desperation. However, another thing arts is lacking is straight women, so surely these STEM boys aren’t necessary. What’s their secret then? What tricks are they hiding behind those thick rimmed glasses, and souped up computers? As I am neither a man nor a person in STEM, I wasn’t going to be someone who could answer these questions, so I was left with no choice. I went straight to the source.

Don’t get me wrong, I love being a woman, but when you are trying to talk to men in STEM, being a woman has its setbacks. These men are not well versed in communicating with women, and many were taken aback

when I tried approaching them, and became even more bewildered when I asked if they were single. You might think that such reactions would help me weed out the single ones, but I knew I couldn’t take any chances. The powerful women of the arts block love themselves a shy man.

After countless failed attempts of conversing with the other half, I was left with no choice but to turn to the only

ones these boys would listen to. Their girlfriends. This should have been my approach from the beginning, there’s apparently no topic these women prefer to discuss, whether it’s gushing about their partner, or giving out stink about still being single, answers were coming at me from all directions.

Arts girls are also a lot more natural when it comes to being unintentionally hit on, hanging mouths turned to flushed

faces, and I even ended up landing myself a date next week. However, the information given to me by the girlfriends didn’t suffice, I needed to witness this mystery with my own eyes. The next step in my plan took place in an interrogation room, also known as one of the countless arts block classrooms with no windows. I brought the couples in one by one, and asked them all a series of questions.

How did you guys meet?

I found him passed out in front of the Hamilton, he’d been trying to go home after spending a week in the library, and whoops – down he went.

How did you manage to wake him up?

Oh, no - I didn’t wake him up, I figured he needed a rest. Instead I put him in my tote bag and brought him to Metro. I knew the soup would do him good.

What drew you to each other?

Our star signs are compatible.

She was the first girl that I had ever spoken to.

Surely that can’t be true. What about in school?

Willow Park and Blackrock College don’t have any women.

Got a sister? Nope. Mom? Dead.

What do you guys have in common?

We both go to college. We’re the same age. Oh, and we both like women.

How come you decided to date a STEM boy then? Surely the girls in arts are more… talkative?

Oh, I’m only bisexual in theory, not in practice.

What do you guys talk about?

Well, mainly I do the talking, and he listens. He’s a great listener. I tell him all about my day, and my dreams for the future, and I keep him up to date on his moon sign. There’s also a lot of silences as well, not awkward ones, but comfortable ones, which shows how strong we are as a couple.

What do you guys enjoy doing together?

We love to go thrift shopping together. He holds onto my finds for me and carries my bags. And when he gets tired I carry him home.

Could you live without each other?

Well, as long as we have access to oxygen I don’t see –

Never! We need one another, we wouldn’t know what to do with ourselves. My baby needs

And lastly, a final question for the lady, do you or did you at some point want a dog?

I used to always want a dog, it was my biggest wish as a child to get one. Up until last year I was desperate for one, but then for some reason that feeling faded.

Can you remember at what point last year this desire for a dog disappeared?

Hmm, around last April I think.

When did you guys get together?

Last March. And that completes my first interview. I won’t bore you with the rest of them, as all the responses were similar enough, lots of mentions of tote bags, thrift shops, and surprisingly no one felt the need to adopt a dog anymore.

However even after the closing of the final interview I still couldn’t pinpoint the attraction of these men. My first thought was to put it down to the poor taste of the women, and their desire for a nonverbal partner, however I backtracked on this conclusion as I figured women get blamed for enough things and I didn’t need to add my intense, scientific research to the mix. The answer had to lie with the men.

I decided to retrace my steps, return to my first approach, observing the target. I trailed who I believed to be a STEM boy for about three hours, until his fourth trip to the Book of Kells informed me that he was in fact a tourist. In my defence the similarity in backpack size of the two groups is uncanny. This blunder however, turned out to be a blessing in disguise. While

tailing the French man I stumbled upon a heated discussion between two men in STEM at the entrance of the Hamilton. The hands of the shorter male were terribly shaky, while the taller of the two appeared to be limping.

“I can’t do it anymore. If I have to roll one more cigarette I swear my hands will seize up.”

“So what? You want to stay single for the rest of your life? Look at me, I can barely stand up thanks to those feckin’ docs, but I’m still going.”

They shared a solemn nod, before heading inside. I followed them from behind, doing my best to look as unsuspecting as possible (I was aiming for ‘husband hunting arts girl’). The men ventured down flights of stairs that I had never seen before, but as this was my first time actually inside the building that was not particularly surprising. We continued down more steps, until eventually they halted outside a large steel door. They quickly keyed in a code, and disappeared through the opening. I stuck my foot in just before the door closed (bloody hurt), and peered into

the room.

The answer to my question lay before my eyes. STEM boys weren’t just smart… they were sexy smart.

The room housed what appeared to be a sort of arts girl bootcamp. There were stations with men carrying loaded tote bags, stations of men running on treadmills with brand new docs. Tables of shaky hands creating mounds of rollies, racks of thrift finds, and more shelves of vegan substitutes than an organic supermarket. At the section nearest to the door, there were groups of men who sat neck deep in horoscope books, desperately scrolling computer screens.

“I found her birthday post, she’s March 11th.”

“That’s Pisces, they’re compatible with Cancers. Your birthday is now between June 21st and July 22nd.”

It all finally made sense. The STEM boys use the only thing they have, intelligence and the ability to appear clueless in everything outside of the big four (STEM), to pull the biggest trick of all.

Bagging an arts girl.

conversations with musicians 12

Emma Fitzpatrick sits down with singer-songwriter Conor Thornton to discuss college degrees, chasing inspiration and his upcoming single ‘Coordinates’.

Music and its collaborators make themselves known in your life at some point, usually at an early age, and are often formed from the presence of others. In my conversation with singer-songwriter Conor Thornton – in a Costa for convenience – the introduction to music wasn’t a certain recollection for him, just the way it had always really been. No key moment flickering in his mind – no particular figure carrying armfuls of CDs and raving about different artists as they are mentioned or heard on the radio. It was more of just growing with the vibrations of music in his surroundings from the soft beginning.

Moving from Harold’s Cross to Rathmines while growing up, Conor himself went to Trinity, landing in the well known BESS course after switching from English Studies in the middle of his first year. It was during his time in Trinity that he formed a band, Voxx, where music itself became more of an active interest of his over just enjoying the background noise of his younger years. Strange mix? Or was I passively being stereotypical? Regardless, this interview isn’t about me.

When I brought up that aspect of having two separate aspects of his life, and therefore

choosing the latter, I asked if his parents or close family had any kind of opinion on it. A common theme for young artists is the head-cocking, concerned questioning from family and friends (and strangers looking to Jack Torrence in torment) about how you’ll make any money, how you’ll live, how you’ll be in a few years time when it doesn’t work out and you have nothing left to give. In theory. Conor, however, never felt the sense of pressure to be some kind of “corporate person”, as he says, and be a part of the idea that you work to work higher up to work higher up - to retire with maybe some kind of pension. His parents were very open to another way of life other than a business degree’s ideas of one, and from that there was always a sense of emotional support and stability that everyone needs behind them.

While there was the parental support and having the perk of already living in Dublin during the accommodation crisis, which is the exact term you should be using for this situation, Conor’s ground was still unsteady in the music scene. It is always fluttering under and above Dublin city, and growing from this over the past few years has been one of restarting, relearning and accepting the idea of your music, your career and your inspiration. One topic we discussed was the lack of support for the arts across the country, while they are such a value to the country’s population, a value we saw extremely increase during the coronavirus pandemic and lockdowns.

The often see sports and academia, especially within educational environments, applauded and funded as the programmes should be. But the arts fall shorter and shorter

in appreciation and lack facilities to continue to inspire those coming. In relation to this, Thornton spoke about the Art Council grant and how while beneficial it was to be given and use to move further in his career in music, this is the kind of thing that doesn’t happen very often for large majorities. “[It’s] the kind of thing that needs a grant to give a grant.”

Another financial support for artists, the Basic Income for the Arts (BIA), is pivotal to artists travelling or working on projects. Thornton says: “it builds your self esteem …it legitimises what you do.” It provides a huge sense of relief and eliminates the pressure of having to get another job. Being an artist is a job on its own, regardless of what people who sit in an office all day typing may say, so to have to add another profession to your life on top of this career is overloading and quite frank-

“There’s a whole thing about the creative space not being yours … they’re just there and someone seizes them and does it … It lets you get out of your own head and not be so precious about it.

ly ridiculous to have to consider in order to have somewhat of a fundable approach to your passion.

This is something that creates what, I can assume, many of us who are working can relate tothe fear of working and purely working will take over, and that there will be no time for what you truly wish to do with your career. As we both spoke about this, it was noted by us both how, either when starting out or pursuing your career heights, you have to constantly produce and create new work and pour over new projects to keep up with the satisfactory algorithm and keep being somewhat relevant in your own space. There isn’t a time period for you to sit back from a piece and detach from it before coming back to edit, as Thornton put it, not like a bestselling author or award winning artist. This, paired with Thornton’s self described “meticulousness” in his own projects and creativity, brought a much heavier sense of reality into Conor’s background and current upcoming project and shed light into one particular philosophy he draws on from it being a constant in his work ethic.

Shane MacGowan, known well for his time as frontman in the band ‘The Pogues’ (who funnily enough have a vastly popular Christmas song while MacGowan himself was born on Christmas Day in 1957), has spoken on the idea of inspiration and idea being in an “infinite well”, and Conor draws on this in his own mind when

working on his music. The idea of having your “antenna up” and to truly seek what you want to turn your idea into serves as motivation at times to Thornton, but also at times the feeling of “screaming into a void.” I cannot blame him for that emotion, I truly believe we all can find ourselves in those depths when on our own paths and in our own careers, whatever they may be.

There is a collective worry around creating and producing your own work. It can feel so delicate and raw, seeping through the fingers, pooling in the palms when you hold the idea. Yet, with all other factors we discussed, like finding time outside of working another job, or the fear of being

left behind in producing, MacGowan’s ideology of a pit of inspiration always up for grabs seemed a somewhat worrying motivation for Conor to keep pushing forward. With this, in an attempt to push himself further, was the creation of his upcoming single ‘Coordinates’. “[It] can only be bad when you think too much about your creativity.”

During his time in Pulse College, he studied a course for scoring Film, TV and Video Games - a new approach to music in his career path. He created ‘Coordinates’ after being tasked with a brief for one of his assessments, with the task being to compose a thirty-second composition for an image chosen by the student from a

selection given to them. The image Thornton landed on was one of a “type of jazz club, party or a cyberzone feel”, and after working on the composition, he found himself to be inspired by something that was “not as attached to what [he] previously released”.

With more of a bare, minimalistic production aspect and having the chance to start it with less emotion attached as it was simply a college project, not a personal one, Thornton recalled listening to it post-production and feeling as though he had created it like: “I can see the shapes of it but can’t make it out.” The music video filmed for it was done on a type of older ‘crank’ camera, almost like an old movie, which he said wasn’t the inspiration for it, but did fit nicely alongside it. It seemed like as the small composition was produced, more and more fell into place for what represents the projects Conor is currently envisioning, with ‘Coordinates’ being the first part of this to come out into the world. Releasing on September 15th 2023, and more in his vaulted well, Conor Thornton is reintroducing his music into the limelight of Dublin once more.

“There is a collective worry around creating and producing your own work. It can feel so delicate and raw, seeping through the fingers, pooling in the palms when you hold the idea.

salad or sandwich...?

Emma Fitzpatrick explains the “salad or sandwich” theory as a new way to interpet perception.

Have you ever been in a well lit pub? Exactly. Microdosed lamps in low ceiling basements with suspiciously expensive speakers hooked to each of the corners of the rooms are a familiar image in my mind. It was in one of the many of these in Dublin city that I hit a new low in one of the most infuriating arguments I have had in quite some time. A lamp - is it a salad or a sandwich? Now, putting the fact that the lamp is indeed just a lamp aside, if you had to choose which category to put a lamp into, and it was between a salad, or a sandwich, which one of you choosing? “Emma”, I hear you think, “is this how you spent your time off from college, lounging in murky pubs throughout the city, making up ridiculous and illogical ‘games’ to entertain yourself and the fool who chooses to go out with you?” Perhaps. Jealous much?

‘Salad or Sandwich’ is one of those games you play during long car journeys to keep yourself entertained and one I discovered when I was around seventeen. Too old for ‘Eye Spy’ but too young to just sit and wait for the destination to arrive (that’s called defeat). Everyone loves a good game - excluding the Saw franchise. A healthy argument, a bit of mental stimulation, exposure to others’ stupidity or dyslexia or colour blindness: it’s all entertaining and just for

some fun. All of these elements alongside the inescapable moving car, and presumably those in said car make for riveting discussions. Salad or Sandwich has more of an opinion based factor to it than ‘Eye Spy’. In ‘Eye Spy’, you can be limited by lack of things to spy, or maybe you’ve played with a younger sibling who could only play if you chose a colour because they couldn’t spell and the options were extremely limited. Why do they choose sky as their answer every single time? No personal anecdotes going on here. Anyways, ‘Salad or Sandwich’ has a much broader baseline to play along. For example - a bed. Is this a salad, or a sandwich? People could say it’s a sandwich, (which it obviously is) because of its shape and layers of bedding. Others may stand their ground regarding it being a salad (they’re wrong), calling out that the bed holding all of the sheets and bedding is a salad in a bowl. You could question the situation further: for example, is the bed made? Are they a blanket person or a one flat pillow kind of sleeper? the list goes on.

So, with the basic concepts laid out, I will ask you againlamp: salad or sandwich?

This was a relentless topic for a long portion of my night in early spring of this year and while I don’t think I argue irrationally, I definitely think it could

be a reason why I’m single. It sparked more than a debate in my mind however, more than a need to win. It brought up the idea of mindset and interpretation.

When I was sixteen, I was incredibly nervous to wear a dress I had found one day in a tiny vintage shop in my hometown. It was so beautiful, long and black with tiny red and yellow flower print covering it. In my teenage years I struggled a lot with my identity. As a queer girl with a girlfriend at the time who was more of a fairy than anyone had ever seen, I felt the need to give into some stereotypes. Should I stay more of a tomboy, dress with a bit more of a masculine sense? Even with perfumes I steered myself towards ones with the word ‘musk’, or would borrow my brother’s. While I did enjoy dressing like this and being more masculine, sometimes I felt the inclination to be more feminine, wear more makeup or whatever I felt at the time. But I was tunnel visioned. I felt I had to be what was expected of me, and whilst sometimes I liked how I looked in dresses, I was more concerned with how others would see things on me. So the day rolls around where I’m standing in my room staring at the dress, wearing baggy jeans and unbothered by the weather. Why was I so scared to put it on? But something

that has stuck with me beyond all those summers since is my partner turning to me and saying - “you know, when someone looks at you in that, they just see a pretty girl in a dress. They don’t know it’s the first time you’re wearing it or that you’re nervous to be in it. If you’re happy in it, that’s all that matters.”

Everyone has their own perception of everything. That’s the outcome of existing among others. Just because someone thinks a bed would be a sandwich or that a lamp is a salad (a lamp is a salad, a lamp is most definitely a salad), doesn’t mean that a conflicting opinion is wrong. Someone could even totally agree with both sides and stay neutral, because that is just their particular mindset. I don’t know exactly what happened to that dress, it is hiding somewhere to avoid another cycle of moving out, but the fear is long gone from within myself and my attachment to it.

The fear of perception in an age of repetitive posting, liking, sharing and originality is a budding one that can slip into the back of your mind almost unnoticed and casually drop an opinion or two. Just enough to unsettle. But is it ever worth taking notice? A dress is just a dress, a lamp is just a lamp, and a salad and a sandwich do nothing to change the way you address your own life.

in the city

An anonymous writer goes over the dos and don’ts of dating in Dublin city.

University life often offers students their first foray into the world of dating. The newfound independence that comes with student accommodation and a part-time job opens up a world of opportunities for meeting new people and exploring romantic connections, and exercising a healthy level of caution and following these basic principles of communication and respect can only serve to enhance your experience.

Do be kind the morning after. Offer them a coffee, walk them to the bus stop and kiss them goodbye if the mood allows for it. Staying the night at someone’s house is a vulnerable enough experience as it is, so don’t make it worse by sitting three feet away from them on the sofa when you were murmuring sweet nothings into their ear the night before. Beyond that, everything you do and don’t do will be relayed to your partner’s flatmates the second they get home in last night’s clothes, so it’s worth keeping your image clean. Don’t hook up with anyone in your course, especially if you’re in a course so small it only qualifies for one Class Rep. Speaking as someone who did, it’s not worth the awkward tutorials or humiliating nights out,

Corrections and clarifications:

no matter how attractive they may look in the Trinity uniform of a stained wife beater, a fraying tote bag and second-hand Doc Martens. Incoming first years won’t even have the barrier of a Zoom screen to protect them. But I know my advice will go unheeded — I can’t interfere, it’s a canon event.

Do play it safe. The Students’ Union building stocks more condoms than even a Surf Soc member could hope to get through at Wind Wave Rave, so take advantage of this ability to avoid the judgemental gaze of the cashier in your local chemist’s. Avail of the free contraceptive initiative and get tested for STIs as regularly as your sex life allows for it. Take it from me: you don’t want to have to message your ex-boyfriend on LinkedIn because he blocked you on everything else to tell him he needs to get tested for chlamydia.

Don’t play it cool. Enthusiasm is in. This isn’t Normal People; there’s nothing romantic about miscommunication or Chinese whispers of affection. This is a small campus, and the glow of an unanswered text is blinding in the harsh light of the Arts Block lecture halls. Be proactive in suggesting dates and be honest about your feelings, because there’s nothing more

embarrassing than harbouring a secret crush for someone who ends up with a DUDJ committee member because you were too late to declare your love.

Do prioritise consent. While we all sat through the SPHE classes and remember the tenuous analogies to cups of tea, it can be harder to recognise the intricacies of informed consent once you are actively exploring your sexuality. Make sure you and your partner are comfortable and enthusiastic about what’s happening, and that the conditions are conducive to a positive and mutually satisfying experience. Don’t make anyone feel obligated to invite you home with them because you’ve accidentally on purpose missed the last bus home.

Don’t keep score. The concept of a ‘body count’ only serves

to reinforce competition and shame. While a notes app list of the people you’ve slept with seems like a good idea when you make it, updating it while hungover and leaving a blank space because you’ve forgotten the name of the Dublin creative you met in Workman’s creates a problem no Taylor Swift song can solve. Except maybe “Cruel Summer”. Exaggerating your sexual history during a game of ‘Never Have I Ever’ or downplaying it in the College Health waiting room benefits nobody and sets a standard that’s impossible to maintain.

Author’s note: The events, characters and societies depicted in this article are fictional. Any resemblance to real persons, living or ignoring my texts, is purely coincidental.

An earlier version of this Magazine referred to Joshua Hernon as the Editor of the University Times. In fact he is the Political Correspondent.