LUCY FORMOSA MORGAN

My self-confidence plummeted and I was taking it out on those around me – my family.

You always hear the phrase, ‘you’ve got to fake it until you make it’. This has become the reality this year…I was given a fantastic opportunity at the start of the year by being promoted to joint managing director at PHD Australia. An opportunity that I honestly couldn’t wait to sink my teeth into and had every confidence that I could do once I got into it! Two months later though, the world turned upside down thanks to COVID19.

With everyone suddenly working remotely, grappling with new technology, constant video calls and new ways of working. I found it all too easy to immediately drop back into my comfort zone of the chief investment and commercial officer role. All of a sudden I found myself well and truly back driving the trading team, stealing the reins off the very talented person we’d promoted the year before to lead trading for the business! It’s so easy to fall back into your old ways under pressure. For the first couple of weeks, I (like many many other people) was really feeling the pressure and hyper-stressed, bogged down in the workload, the detail, jumping from task to task while working all the hours there were.

My self-confidence plummeted and I was taking it out on those around me – my family. I didn’t feel like I was doing my new role at all. I didn’t believe I was faking it any more.

For the first couple of weeks, I wasn’t making time for anything bar work and juggling the kids. I’d never worked from home before so seeing the laptop switched on in the kitchen everyday just heightened my stress levels as I gravitated back to it at every opportunity to keep wading through the work and hundreds of emails piling up. It took my seven-year-old daughter constantly saying for two weeks, ‘mum you’re not meant to be working right now’, ‘mum it’s the weekend why are you working?’, ‘mum you said you were spending time with us now’, to actually stop and take a good look at what was going on. It was at that point that I made myself take the time to do some yoga every morning and take the dog for a walk too. My daughter’s voice in my ear (constantly!) and forcing myself to have ‘me time’ broke the spell for me. I consciously started making myself step out from interfering with the trading team. It hasn’t been easy; I’m a control freak let’s be honest and these have been crazy times in a brand new role. Chatting through my feelings with my CEO and peers not long after that also gave me the confidence that I wasn’t the only one grappling with a new world but through conversation, me time and getting back in control mentally, meant that I was in a far better place. These have been extraordinary times but we’re doing a great job even if there’s some muddling on the way through.

I am now thriving from working from home and loving my new role. The first two weeks of isolation really taught me how important it is to look after yourself and not put unnecessary pressure on yourself.

LUCY FORMOSA MORGAN

JOINT MANAGING DIRECTOR AT PHD