Yak October 2012

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BACK IN STEIN Sam Rayfield takes a look at the history behind everyone’s favourite festival.

SAY HELLO TO SUNDAY Rowena Grant lets us know what it’s like to be without alcohol for three months.

THE MAN BEHIND THE MUSIC We all know his face, but Nick Turner introduces us to the man behind the music.

ISSUE 11 / OCTOBER 2012 BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE U

CONTENTS 06

Cover design by Hannah Sunderland

EDITORIAL Matt Hatton - Managing Editor Rowena Grant - Managing Editor Nick Turner - Deputy Managing Editor Claire Young - Deputy Editor Jessica McAneney - Deputy Editor Richard Baines - Deputy Editor Jessica Rykers - Junior Graphic Designer Leah Henkel - Promotions Officer Angela Geddes - Art Director

CONTRIBUTORS Amy Theodore - Contributing Writer Brittany Turner - Contributing Writer Gemma Roulstone - Graphic Design Hannah Sunderland - Graphic Design Jessica Charnley - Graphic Design Joshua Uren - Graphic Design Katie Burgess - Contributing Writer Lachie Leeming - Contributing Writer Lucy Jones - Graphic Design Michelle Carratt - Contributing Writer Pasqualina Perone- Contributing Writer Sam Rayfield - Contributing Writer

SUBMISSIONS The Yak editorial team is always on the look out for passionate student writers and graphic designers to contribute to the magazine. If you would like to take the opportunity to get your work published, please send a sample of your writing to yakmagazine@newcastle.edu.au.

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MORE THAN JUST AN OKTOBEER-FEST

HEY NOW...

YOU’RE AN ALL STAR

HELLO SUNDAY MORNING

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22

I AIN’T AFRAID OF NO GHOST

THE MAN BEHIND THE MUSIC

HITTING ALL THE RIGHT NOTES

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APOCALYPSE FOR THE UN-GROWN

THE USUAL STUFF

04 UoNline

20-21 Spotted

05 How to

23 Places and Spaces

05 Watt Space 09 Green U

23 You Study WHAT?!

26 5 Things

09 Support U

26 Dickie’s Dilemma

14 What’s On 20 The Awkward Moment When

27 Vox Pops

ADVERTISING For advertising opportunities, contact Nick at yakmagazine@newcastle.edu.au Get your free copy from press-points around campus on Monday, Nov 05.

yakmagazine@newcastle.edu.au

facebook.com/yakmagazine

twitter.com/yakmagazine Yak magazine is a free publication of UoN Services Ltd © 2012. www.uonservices.org.au Printed by PrintCentre on Callaghan Campus.

• So you’ve finished uni, now what?

• Your guide to summer travel.

• Plus, we have your christmas tipple covered.

Yak Magazine is published by UoN Services Limited at the University of Newcastle. The views expressed herein are not necessarily the views of UoN Services Limited or the University of Newcastle, unless explicitly stated. UoN Services Limited accepts no responsibility for the accuracy of any of the opinions of information contained in this issue of Yak Magazine.

In addition, Yak Magazine may at times accept forms of cash advertising, sponsorship, paid insertions or other forms of affiliate compensation to subsidise the costs associated with producing the magazine. We recommend you do your own research and draw your own conclusions about any product claim, technical specifications, statistic, quote or other representation about a product, service, manufacturer, or provider.

LETTER FROM

THE EDITOR

THIS MONTH’S BITING QUESTION: “What will you be spring cleaning this season?”

MANAGING EDITOR

A WORD FROM OUR MANAGING EDITOR,

ROWIE We all have room for a little spring cleaning in our lives. Whether it is cleaning out our wardrobes and donating the clothes to charity, cleaning our cars (finally) or cleaning up our attitudes, everyone has some room for a little improvement.

This spring I will be cleaning up my diary.

I’ve always been one to overcommit myself to internships, social events, sport, work and uni.

While I’m currently holding down two jobs, three internships, a hockey team, a position as the social coordinator for the Uni’s Rugby League Club, trying to spend time with friends, plus finishing my last semester of my degree, I’ve decided it is time to stop and smell the roses (literally).

Spring is springing and so are some beautiful colours in our landscape. I want to have the time to enjoy this and not be stressed or worried that I am meant to be doing something else. This is (probably) the last semester I have at university, so I am never going to enjoy this lifestyle again!

It’s time to appreciate it and enjoy the sunshine.

If you’re having trouble finding something to spring clean in your life, take a look at our 5 Things column on page 26 and grab some ideas. Why not post what you’re cleaning on our Facebook page as well.

Maybe you would like to detox and give up alcohol for a little while; maybe participate in Ocsober? Check out my guide to Hello Sunday Morning on page 13 and get your new life kick started.

If beards are more your thing, then read Lachie Leeming’s interview with John Beardman Jr. from Adelaide band The Beards on page 24. He’s got a lot of good advice. Most of it about beards.

If you fancy yourself a bit of a beast in the kitchen, then peruse Claire Young’s interview with Masterchef All-Star, Callum Hann on page 10.

Maybe it might inspire you to spring clean your arteries!

Happy Yakking!

ROWENA GRANT

When I’m done with my diary, I will be cleaning out my pantry. I refuse to buy more food while I still have a billion tins of tuna that I haven’t touched. Pretty sure there are a heap of dead ants in there as well. I should do something about that.

MANAGING EDITOR

MATT HATTON

I think I am going to spring clean my list of things that I should probably spring clean. There’s no way that I’m actually going to get around to any of it, so I may as well just sit back and enjoy the warmer weather.

DEPUTY MANAGING EDITOR

NICK TURNER

I think it’s time for me to clean out all of those medium size shirts I bought, because it’s looking as though I’ll never actually grow into them.

DEPUTY EDITOR - REGULAR CONTENT

JESSICA MCANENEY

It is soon time for me to move out of International House as my university degree comes to an end - I will be cleaning out the astronomical amount of clothing and items I own to make my move easier.

DEPUTY EDITOR - FEATURES & PROFILES

CLAIRE YOUNG

My car. The macca’s bags, 17 pairs of shoes and old school CDs have got to go (if anyone would like to borrow Will Smith’s greatest hits or the Parent Trap soundtrack hit me up). But seriously, I don’t remember the last time I saw the carpet.

DEPUTY EDITOR - COLUMNS

RICHARD BAINES

My body - September saw both my girlfriend’s birthday and my own, The Beautiful Girls and a close friends 21st.

When the notorious “student budget” combines with so many events, unsafe amounts of goon and mcdoubles are consumed.

JUNIOR GRAPHIC DESIGNER

JESSICA RYKERS

What don’t I have to clean out? But I think I’ll start with my wardrobe, plus the boxes of stored clothes which I put away in case I ever want them... Lets face it, I’ll never wear any of it again..

PROMOTIONS OFFICER

LEAH HENKEL

My hard drive. You all know what I’m talking about, where you have loads of crap on that thing that you have had for years and haven’t looked at in just as long. I should call it my iPod as there are millions of files on there, but all I do is ‘skip’ the ones that aren’t relevant to me anymore.

Yak Magazine - October 2012

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twitter.com/yakmagazine

28%

Devon People singing Happy Birthday to you Oktoberfest

48% 52% 85%

15% 41%

Gherkins on Cheeseburgers Ghosts

LUKE

72%

27%

59% 73%

To the girl I was sitting next to this morning in Huxley who opened her laptop to a pretty hardcore porn website, yes I did see, and thanks for the many laughs your reaction gave me.

413 people like this

IAIN

Can I get volunteers to hide with me in an empty room and wait for the census counting people and when they come in yell ‘Surprise!’.

27 people like this

MICAELA

Yes!

GABBY

Hells yes. I’m sick of being fucking counted.

I’M MORE THAN JUST A NUMBER, DAMN IT!

2 people like this

LANCE Meme’s: Sourced from UoN Memes.

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Yak Magazine - October 2012

28 people like this

Misheard thefts in library announcement. I am relieved that I won’t die when leaving my laptop unattended when going to the toilet.

CHOOSE A ROOMMATE Looking for that special someone to split enormous rent and utility bills with? You may be in desperate need of a helping hand and willing to accept the first person who responds to your plea, but here are a few things to consider that might make living with another human more pleasant: What kind of sleeping patterns does this person have?

We know some university students can be nocturnal creatures, especially those used to pulling all-nighters. The sounds of footsteps and the shuffling of objects all night long can be an annoyance for light sleepers.

Avoid those with a chronic partying disorder. They are characterised by partying almost every night of the week, regardless of what they, or others may have to get done, or the sleep you may need. Side effects include waking up to lots of random people all over your house and mountains of mess.

If you’re OCD about cleanliness, you obviously want to avoid someone who would rather leave everything on the floor and deal with it later. On the flip side, all you proudly messy people may think having someone with the same attitude as you would be cool, but that will double the mess and leave no-one to clean it up. Maybe think about finding someone who likes a tidy abode, who might even be willing to clean up after you if it gets all too much for them.

By Amy Theodore

For those of us who prefer minimal conversation, don’t go getting yourself a roommate who loves the sound of their own voice. If you’re someone who loves to have a chat, don’t go getting a roommate who would prefer to watch TV in silence. On the other hand, if you are the talkative type, maybe someone who is willing to just sit there and listen would be perfect.

Don’t be afraid of change. The other four tips have all been about finding someone that suits you. But, if you’re someone who can handle a bit of variation in their life, maybe finding someone who has an opposite personality will be a great experience? You will learn to embrace other people’s differences.

Sharing a house with other students is a unique university experience. Finding a roommate should not be a strenuous or stressful activity, but if you do find yourself with someone who has an annoying habit, just let them know (as nicely as possible of course!).

OCTOBER EXHIBITION 10 – 28 OCTOBER

31 OCTOBER – 18 NOVEMBER

> Look See 2012 - Join us for this annual festival of design, co-ordinated

by Carl Morgan

> Bachelor of Fine Arts Honours 2012 Join us to celebrate the culmination of their studies as five Fine Art Honours students display their final bodies of work.

Friday, October 12, 6.30pm

Thursday, November 1, 6.30pm

Email: wattspace@newcastle.edu.au Website: www.newcastle.edu.au/group/watt-space Facebook: Search: Watt Space Student Gallery of the University of Newcastle.

Watt Space Gallery, University House, Auckland St Newcastle. Open 11am -5 pm, Wed - Sun. Ph: 4921 8733 Watt Space is funded by UoN Services Limited and supported by the University of Newcastle School of Drama, Fine Art and Music.

Yak Magazine - October 2012

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More Than Just an ...ha, ha

I

t seems that as time has gone on justifiable excuses to drink alcohol have become few and far between. For example, the first person to so guiltlessly declare, “It’s 5-o’clock somewhere,” surely mustn’t have expected such originality to be recycled to the point of humorlessness, while a friend of mine’s mantra-like, “It’s Wednesday,” only seems to signal the beginning of a weekly ritual.

Such phenomena, though, seems to contribute to the perpetuation of what has now ironically become perhaps the greatest phenomenon of all; the greatest excuse of all - despite being known by only one heralded, salivating word... that word, ladies and gentlemen, is Oktoberfest.

But what is it about such a word that inspires such annual anticipation?

Many, of course, regard it as a nowinternational event that recognises Southern German culture with as much chicken and beer as possible, treating it as a celebration for celebration’s sake - and they’re not entirely wrong, either.

It is often assumed that the festival signaled the beginning of the harvest; however, it was in fact the thenCrown Prince Ludwig’s marriage to Princess Therese of SaxeHildburghausen that inadvertently inaugurated the yearly tradition.

Extending the invitation to the city’s entire population, parades and horse

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Yak Magazine - October 2012

races in both the presence of the royal family and an estimated 40 000 other visitors were held on what was essentially a massively open space known as Theresienwiese, in the centre of Munich.

Whether planned or not, Ludwig’s October 12th celebrations coincided with the need to deplete the spring overstocking of beer in order to make room for the autumn production. In one of the most convenient lacks of refrigerative technology, alcohol was in complete abundance, poured for even the most penniless of attendees.

Proving such a hit, the decision to hold the parades and races the following year meant that Oktoberfest’s wheels were turning. An agricultural show held that same year, carnival booths added in 1816 and a carousel present in 1818, it had became something more than just an early excuse to drink beer.

Grounded in bronze by the statue of Bavaria constructed in 1850 and chosen by recently-abdicated Ludwig, the monument stoically served to remind organisers that whenever the population was stricken by war or disease, Theresienwiese had at least one permanent attendee, and that the

following year’s celebrations needed to be better than ever.

I was fortunate enough to speak with a Bavarian exchange student, Michael, and he says that Oktoberfest is a spectacle that everyone must experience.

“First you drink the beer and then you somehow end up standing on the tables, and everyone just has a good time.”

Speaking reminiscently of his first time attending as a child enjoying the many family-friendly attractions, he notices that while still an essential part of his culture, the festivities have become “overcrowded” and exponentially “touristic”.

Instead, he recommends that the many smaller celebrations in Bavaria’s villages, known as Volksfests, give a much more authentic experience of his homeland’s culture.

Essentially a scaled-down Oktoberfest, the “People’s Festivals” give the region’s some 600 other breweries a chance to promote their equally honed crafts.

By contemporary standards, a crowd of 40 000 people at a music festival would be considered a success.

Compared to 7.1 million at the record-breaking 1985 Oktoberfest though, its annually repeated motive of cultural explosion never seems to grow tiresome.

With 2011’s attendance of 6.9 million proving the most consumptive yet, beer and chicken were devoured in absolute ubiquity. Known as a Maß (pronounced “mas”) over 7 million of the face consuming Bavarian beer mugs were poured, emptied and poured again, while some 500 000 chickens lost their lives due to exquisite German recipes. Obviously, it’s not your average “No animals were harmed in the celebration of this year’s Oktoberfest” kind of event.

Such a congregation recognised only as pure statistics, however, does no justice to the folk-like traditions associated with the event. Moreover, the Bavarian culture itself is the entire reason the festivities have ballooned to such epic proportions.

While an increasing number of international visitors must obtain

7 million

Bavarian beer mugs imitation costumes from offshore sources such as China and Southeast Asia, traditional dress is worn authentically by many of the Bavarian locals.

Basically breeches comprised of leather and often embroidered with swirling, ornate patterns and designs, a lederhosen is often accompanied by a brim-hat with a feather from its top, alongside socks pulled close to the knee covered by laced leather shoes. An example of traditional workwear now made obsolete, modern use of the lederhosen is typically found amongst men engaging in more naturalistic forms of leisure, such as gardening, hiking and, of course, beer festivals.

Similar to the lederhosen in its detailed artistry, the dirndl is

comprised of a bodice, blouse, full skirt and apron. Once common amongst female servants as a hardy and easily cleaned garment, the traditional female mode of dress has since undergone a majorly commercial makeover. Now prevalent in the Bavarian tourism industry and amongst the affectionately titled wenches in the beer tents, they have a distinct yet unexplainable ability to convince men to purchase things they truly can’t afford.

It is within these tents, though, that the fullness of the culture is truly experienced. With a total of 14 tents holding in excess of 10 000 people each, and 18 others with capacities in the low hundreds, the echoes of merriment and gala heard from within are some of the most jubilant known to man.

Ornately detailed murals depicting an

World record 7.1 million

music are chanted indiscriminately.

Speaking of the beer, this Lowenbrau I’ve been sipping on as I write (solely for the sake of cultural insight, I assure you) certainly tells me that the beer is certainly worthy of its own celebrations.

Brewed according to what is known as the oldest assurance of consumer protection still in effect, the Bavarian Purity Laws, or the Reinheitsgebot, states that beers of the area are to be solely constituent of water, barley and hops.

Initiated in 1516 yet overturned as a part of German law in 1987, it has become such a quality-ensuring tradition that many breweries still adhere to its strict guidelines.

So, while you still may find yourself a drunkenly dozing “bierlechen” (“beer corpse” - an understandable concept)

500,000

Attendees at 1985 Oktoberfest

Chickens consumed

older-fashioned Munich decorate the inner-walls, while chandelier-like balls of streamers and colour hang from the ceilings.

despite your newfound knowledge of Oktoberfest’s cultural significance, don’t allow such morbidity to be taken literally - the Bavarian culture is one of the world’s liveliest; filled with debauchery to the brim yet never seeming to overflow.

A mighty cry of “O’zapft is!” echoes throughout the hall from the incumbent mayor of Munich as the first keg is successfully tapped, and the hall erupts into a cacophony of “Prost!”, as the beer is passed around. Anyone who decides that that the monolithic mugs can be skulled is met with either an embracing cheer or affectionate jeer upon success or failure.

By their 11am opening times, the tents are hubs of rhythmic and encouraged chaos. Oom-pah bands with brass instruments such as tubas and trumpets give the aural atmosphere golden warmth, while choruses to both popular and folk

UoN Services Limited (the U) are offering five 20 week (160 hours total) Industry Scholarships starting semester 1, 2013, each worth $2880. Apply for a scholarship for the chance to get involved in Campus Life in order to get invaluable hands on industry experience while building your rĂŠsumĂŠ.

ARE YOU... the caring friend, always looking out for those around you? Apply to be a Student Support Scholar at the U and support your fellow students while learning new skills!

a mindful observer, making up the balance to preserve our treasured greens and ensuring responsible practice? Apply as Sustainability Scholar with the U and make UoN a greener place for everyone!

a BIG thinker, improving things when you think it can be done better? Apply as Innovation Scholar with the U and put on that Think BIG hat to start innovating the student experience!

a smooth talker and a wise wordsmith?

Know how to get the message across and know the right channel to do it? Be it tweeting, talking or typing? Apply as the Engagement Communications Scholar at the U!

a social guru, organising parties and events that everybody wants to be at?

Get this party started and apply to be the Engagement Activities Scholar with the U to make sure that all UoN students have a good time!

Keep up to date with the current scholars, their projects and experiences through the Industry Scholars at the U Tumblr. http://industry-scholars-at-the-u.tumblr.com/

Apply online at www.newcastle.edu.au/uniss For more information visit www.uonservices.org.au

Coal Seam Gas (CSG) is a highly contested practice that has received quite a lot of attention recently in environmental and political circles. Yet what surprises me is that the vast majority of people that I talk to have absolutely no idea what CSG is, let alone the effects that it can have on the environment or the residents in areas where CSG is being explored. Even more concerning is the relatively low amount of media coverage that this topic received in the Hunter Valley region until locals and other concerned individuals and groups started to take non-violent direct action. I thought that for this month, I would write a (VERY) brief and simple summary of just exactly what the issue with CSG is.

Methods of CSG mining can differ, but the main process that occurs is to install a portable gas well which will drill down to the coal seam to extract gas, most of which is methane. Wells in Queensland are up to 600 metres deep, running the risk of contamination through the aquifers used for irrigation and drinking water. The main concerns surrounding CSG include negative impacts upon the environment, food production, water security, and human health fears, all of which have been experienced in CSG towns in America.

SUP PORT U Ps get degrees. It’s the all too familiar approach that students take to their studies each and every semester.

It’s also something that the University of Newcastle assists with through PASS sessions, a program adapted from the Australian National Centre for PASS program from the University of Wollongong.

Now as previously mentioned, this is an extremely brief description of a very complicated and controversial practice. If you’re at all interested in finding out more about CSG and the effects that it can have on people, the environment and water security, I urge you to fire up Google and research both sides of the argument. Lock The Gate Alliance Inc. (http://lockthegate.org.au/) have a strong campaign running against CSG which is definitely worth a look, particularly if you’re interested in actively getting involved in the fight against CSG. On the other hand, if you’re searching for a relatively unbiased description, then ABC News online (http://www.abc.net.au/news/specials/coal-seam-gasby-the-numbers/drilling/) has an impressive interactive special feature on CSG that will help you to become more informed about both the practice and where it is happening around Australia.

So log on, and make yourself aware. After all, education is the key to contributing to a greener you.

PASS

By Jessica McAneney

Not a business or law student? Never fear! Law students are encouraged to seek out a mentor in their first year of study to assist them throughout their degree. Meanwhile, our future doctors participate in Problem Based Learning (PBL) classes where they must participate in group discussion and research to assist them in their studies.

PASS sessions are Peer Assisted Study Sessions for some Business and Health faculty subjects and occur weekly for students to compare notes, discuss course content and informally engage with their peers to gain a better understanding of their studies.

Regardless of your enrolment, course or timetable – one should still consider studying with friends leading up to the exam period. Here at Yak we have noticed that the benefits of filling the learning gap, breaking the monotony of study and getting a fresh perspective from your peers can significantly improve your grades.

Run by students who have previously studied (and excelled at the particular course in question) PASS sessions have proved to be quite successful in ensuring Ps – and in turn degrees.

With the exam period less than a month away, there is no better time to take advantage of the pool of intellectual knowledge that is awaiting you.

With registration at the beginning of semester, PASS sessions are not just for those who are after pass marks.

No matter your academic level, they aim to assist all those who are seeking guidance, clarification or enhancement of their studies.

Who knows – you might see yourself with a healthy HD.

Yak Magazine - October 2012

09

Our Features Editor Claire Young caught up with MasterChef All Stars winner, Callum Hann, and discovered the perfect hangover brekkie feed, how to cook on a budget and what’s next for the culinary superstar.

Can you tell me a bit about your new cookbook, The Starter Kitchen?

The Starter Kitchen, I suppose, is the book that I wrote basically for my own housemates. I taught them how to cook because they didn’t really know too much about cooking at all, so I wrote the book without assuming too much. There are lots of great cookbooks out there but some of them assume too much knowledge and it can be kind of intimidating when you’re first getting into the kitchen or honing in on your skills.

So it would be perfect for uni students who don’t know how to cook very well?

Yeah, exactly right. One of the first things I did when I finished MasterChef in 2010 was [spend] a couple of months going around to different universities and doing cooking lessons for students and that’s basically where I found my passion for teaching I suppose. Now I run my own cooking school called Sprout and we do everything from teaching primary kids right up to adults. We teach people about eating well and good food and how easy it is to cook.

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Yak Magazine - October 2012

Lots of our students are living on a budget and can’t afford to buy a whole lot of ingredients so what would your tips be for cooking on a budget when sometimes all you can afford is noodles?

If you don’t cook much already I think learning to cook is such a good thing to do when you’re on a budget. When I was at uni I didn’t have much money and neither did my friends, but I found that [while I was] cooking my own dinner [and] they went out to Subway or Wok in a Box or KFC every night that they were burning through a lot more money than I was. I think one of the things you’ve got to do (which saves time and money) is cook things in bulk. Things like stews and curries and braises and soups and casseroles and those sorts of things are great. If you’ve got a bit of time on a Sunday afternoon or maybe on a Monday or Tuesday night, make a big saucepan full of it even if you’re just cooking for yourself and then put it into little containers and then chuck it into your fridge or freezer. And then you’ve got lunch and dinners for the next couple of days as well.

Any tips for a good hangover breakfast feed?

I do. It’s a recipe out of my book that I make all the time for my friends and myself when I’m hungover. Basically it’s called Greek Baked Beans and it’s kind of like... not the crappy ones you get out of the tin but it’s like making your own baked beans from scratch and they keep incredibly well. It has bacon, carrots, garlic, onion, tomatoes and then beans added in at the end, and then you put feta cheese and parsley on top as you serve it. It goes really well with toasty bread or ciabatta and it definitely hits the spot.

So you’ve got the cookbook, you’re running Sprout cooking classes...

What’s next? Do you think you’ll open up a restaurant in the future?

Before I got onto MasterChef my two goals in life were to run my own cooking classes and to write a cookbook and both of those things I’ve done this year so I think I need to re-evaluate my goals.

I don’t necessarily know if restaurants are what I want to do. I worked with George [Calombaris, MasterChef judge] after the show for a little while and I really enjoyed the restaurant scene but since I’ve been doing actual teaching and cooking classes I really enjoy interacting with people and showing people things.

I think that’s probably more what I enjoy doing at the moment. When I opened up my cooking school a lot of people said to me, “Who are you to teach people anything about food? You’re not qualified.” And I kind of think that’s the exact reason why I should be teaching people about food because I think sometimes when cooking classes are run by chefs, they’re cheffy. They’re great and you learn a lot but it’s not always that practical to domestic kitchens and to actually living a normal life. What I really like doing is showing people stuff that’s really tasty, but that is something you can do on a Tuesday night when you get home from work at 6 o’clock.

Don’t be put off by the name — these are a far cry from the ho-hum tinned version of baked beans. Awesome for breakfast or dinner, I like them served with a poached egg or maybe some sliced avocado on toast. Okay, so these beans are not really all that Greek (and they’re not even baked if you want to get right down to it), so make sure you put the feta on top to give it at least a little bit of authenticity.

Greek baked beans preparation time 20 minutes // cooking time 20 minutes // serves 4 1. In a large saucepan, heat the oil over medium heat. Add the bacon and once golden, add the carrot, celery, onion and garlic. Cook, stirring occasionally, until the onion is translucent. Add the tomatoes and simmer for 10 minutes or until the mixture is no longer watery and has thickened.

2. Stir in the beans and season with a generous pinch of salt and pepper. Scatter over the feta and parsley and serve with toasted bread.

1 tablespoon olive oil 3 streaky bacon rashers, rind removed and sliced about 5 mm (W inch) thick 1 carrot, finely chopped 1 celery stalk, finely chopped 1 brown onion, diced 2 garlic cloves, thinly sliced 2 x 400 g (14 oz) tins chopped tomatoes 2 x 400 g (14 oz) tins beans (such as cannellini/white, butterbeans/lima or even chickpeas), drained and rinsed 100 g (3V oz) feta cheese, crumbled, to serve V cup flat-leaf (Italian) parsley leaves, chopped toasted bread, to serve

just like mum makes

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Designed by Gemma Roulstone

Rowena Grant works out just how amazing you can feel with a little change.

One of the biggest assumptions society makes regarding uni students is that we’re all a bunch of borderline-alcoholics.

While this assumption is up there with other, less-informed stereotypes like ‘mature aged students never shut up,’ ‘all students are lazy’ and ‘tights aren’t pants’ there is a tiny hint of truth to it.

During my first couple of years at university, I lived on campus at a residential college where drinking and going out were the norm for social events. After two and a half years of that lifestyle, it started to take its toll on my relationships and my health. I needed a change.

I was lucky enough to hear about a program called Hello Sunday Morning (HSM), which was created by Chris Raine.

After working at an advertising firm and creating campaigns for different alcohol brands, one morning Chris woke up with the mother of all hangovers and decided to make a change in his life. He gave up alcohol for 12 months, and has since spent his time establishing an amazing not-for-profit charity organisation that makes a difference in young Australians’ lives.

He created Hello Sunday Morning as a response to Australia’s increasingly binge-drinking youth, and the problems that stem from this.

So what is Hello Sunday Morning? HSM is a program which helps you take a break from alcohol for a little while to see what life is like without the hangover. You sign up to it online, choose how long you want to give up alcohol for (generally three months to start with), and then you begin. While you’re doing it, you receive support from the whole HSM community through your online profile.

It’s important to realise that HSM is not anti-alcohol.

“We’re not like [Alcoholics Anonymous],” Chris emphasises.

“We’re about everyday people making a change and sharing it with others.”

Originally the program involved blogging about your experiences as they happened, but it’s about to become a whole lot more interactive.

The new support program includes different ‘badges’ that you can put on your profile. For example, if you have been without alcohol for a week, you get a badge. If you accidentally have a slip-up, you can let everyone know and they can help you out with it. The badge system is designed to help you engage more with the community and, as a result, you can receive more support.

If you are looking for a change in your life – whether you may be a drinker, or not – then I implore you to consider HSM. In three months, it changed my life completely. Staying off alcohol gave me more confidence; I had more time to spend doing what I wanted, my overall health improved and so did my concentration span.

But don’t think HSM comes without its challenges. Francis Conroy, an engineering student at UoN, did not successfully complete the program. He found there was little support for him and thus had a very hard time doing it alone. “Eventually the pressure from my peers caused me to cave. I lost sight of why I was really doing it in the first place,” he explains. “The program itself was quite well thought out, but that said I think it is a much more useful experience when undertaken with some friends, not only for your own benefit but to promote the idea with some force.”

This is what the new structure is aiming to improve, with the badges and short status updates making support more accessible.

If you are interested in the idea but are having trouble getting over the fear of sober dancing, conversations with drunk people and being able to remember everything, here is some motivation: you will stockpile a cornucopia of valuable information to use against your friends.

You can find more information on Hello Sunday Morning at: www.hellosundaymorning.com.au Yak Magazine - September 2012

13

Recess WK1 Week 10 01 MONDAY 08 MONDAY Mattara Hillclimb 9am - King Edward Park

Wii Wars 3pm - GT Bar

02 TUESDAY 03 WEDNESDAY 04 THURSDAY 05 FRIDAY

Poker 4.30pm - Bar on the Hill

Bar Village 7pm - Cambridge - $17 Chad “Hollywood” Bennett vs James Armah 6.30pm - Newcastle Panthers > Tickets from $30

06/07 SAT/SUN Newcastle Jockey Club Race Day Sat: Broadmeadow Racecourse Newy Parkrun Sat: 8am - Throsby Creek, Carrington Newcastle Jets FC vs Adelaide United FC Sun: 3pm - Hunter Stadium Joe Bonamassa Sun: Civic Theatre > Tickets start from $95.50 Newcastle City Farmers Market Sun: 8am - 1pm Broadmeadow Showground

12

OCT

13/14 SAT/SUN

13

U Event

Oktoberfest 11.30am - 5pm Bar on the Hill

OCT

09 TUESDAY

Bar on the Hill Gig Frenzal Rhomb Saturday: Bar on the Hill Doors open 7.30pm Tix: U Members: $25 Students: $27.50 Guests: $27.50 Newcastle City Farmers Market Sun: 8am - 1pm Broadmeadow Showground

Trivia 1pm - Bar on the Hill Bar Bingo 3pm - GT Bar Swan Lake 7.30pm - Civic Theatre > Tickets from $77.90

10 WEDNESDAY

WEEK 11 15 MONDAY Wii Wars 3pm - GT Bar

Trivia 1pm - GT Bar

Poker 4.30pm - Bar on the Hill

Pool Comp 3pm - GT Bar

16 TUESDAY

Wind up Wednesday 3pm - 7pm - Bar on the Hill Swan Lake 7.30pm - Civic Theatre > Tickets from $77.90

11 THURSDAY

U Member Happy Hour 4pm - 6pm - GT Bar

12 FRIDAY U Member Happy Hour 4pm - 6pm - Bar on the Hill Oktoberfest 11.30am - 5pm - Bar on the Hill

18

Bar on the Hill Gig

Frenzal Rhomb Doors open 7.30pm Bar on the Hill

OCT

Trivia 1pm - Bar on the Hill Bar Bingo 3pm - GT Bar

17 WEDNESDAY Trivia 1pm - GT Bar Pool Comp 3pm - GT Bar Wind Up Wednesday 3pm - 7pm Alumni Awards 6.45pm - Newcastle City Hall Australia vs South Africa (Netball) 8pm - Newcastle Entertainment Centre > Tickets from $46

Bar on the Hill Gig

Lisa Mitchell Doors open 7.30pm Bar on the Hill

OCTOBER 18 THURSDAY

23 TUESDAY

27/28 SAT/SUN

01 THURSDAY/NOV

U Member Happy Hour 4pm - 6pm - GT Bar

Trivia 1pm - Bar on the Hill

U Member Happy Hour 4pm - 6pm - GT Bar

Bar on the Hill Gig Lisa Mitchell Bar on the Hill Doors open 7.30pm Tix: U Members: $20 Students: $22.50 Guests: $26.50

Bar Bingo 3pm - GT Bar

The Dockyard Dames vs Auckland Roller Derby League Sat: Newcastle Entertainment Centre > Tickets from $19

Work Integrated Learning Awards 5.30pm - University Art Gallery

24

19 FRIDAY U Member Happy Hour 4pm - 6pm - Bar on the Hill

WEDNESDAY

Trivia 1pm - GT Bar

Newcastle City Farmers Market Sun: 8am - 1pm - Broadmeadow Showground

29 MONDAY

Wind up Wednesday 3pm - 7pm - Bar on the Hill

Wii Wars 3pm - GT Bar Poker 4.30pm - Bar on the Hill

Ronald McDonald House Charity Race Day Sat: Broadmeadow Racecourse

Bar on the Hill Gig The Beards Bar on the Hill Doors open 7.30pm Tix: U Members: $20 Students: $22.50 Guests: $22.50

Ollie Brown Sat: 9.30pm - Northern Star Hotel > Tickets $10

25 THURSDAY

Bar Bingo 3pm - GT Bar

The Black Keys Sun: 8.45pm - Newcastle Entertainment Centre > Tickets $93.75

U Member Happy Hour 4pm - 6pm - GT Bar

iLead Completion Ceremony 4.30pm - HB15 (Hunter Building)

Trivia 1pm - GT Bar

20/21 SAT/SUN

Newcastle City Farmers Market Sun: 8am - 1pm - Broadmeadow Showground

WEEK 12 22 MONDAY Wii Wars 3pm - GT Bar Poker 4.30pm - Bar on the Hill

24

OCT

26 FRIDAY U Member Happy Hour 4pm - 6pm - Bar on the Hill Bar on the Hill Gig Ball Park Music Bar on the Hill Doors open 7.30pm Tix: U Members: $29.50 Students: $32 Guests: $32

26

Bar on the Hill Gig

The Beards Doors open 7.30pm Bar on the Hill

OCT

U Member Happy Hour 4pm - 6pm - Bar on the Hill

03/04 SAT/SUN/ NOV

WEEK 13

Pool Comp 3pm - GT Bar

The Swellers 8pm - The Cambridge > Tickets $25

02 FRIDAY/NOV

30 TUESDAY Trivia 1pm - Bar on the Hill

31

WEDNESDAY

Pool Comp 3pm - GT Bar Wind up Wednesday 3pm - 7pm - Bar on the Hill U Event Halloween Party Bar on the Hill Doors open 7.30pm Entry: Students: FREE Guests: $10 Prizes up for grabs for ‘best dressed individual’, and ‘best dressed group’.

31

Bar on the Hill Gig

Ball Park Music Doors open 7.30pm Bar on the Hill

OCT

U Event

Halloween Party Doors open 7.30pm Bar on the Hill

Designed by Lucy Jones

Claire Young explores the paranormal side of things, just in time for Halloween.

It happens when you’re home alone, when it’s really late at night and right after you’ve watched a ridiculously scary movie.

Doors slam without being touched, you hear noises outside your bedroom, your TV turns to static and something flickers in your peripheral vision.

But there’s no such things as ghosts, right? ….Right?

According to Renata Brown, owner and operator of Newcastle Ghost Tours, paranormal activity isn’t just something found in a movie, it’s all over our city. Renata has been running ghost tours for the past year and a half, and frequently comes across spirits from the other side. “We have seen ghosts on our tours,” Renata says.

“Some people have seen full body apparitions during one of our tours. We can’t guarantee that people will see, hear or feel anything, but they often do experience something unusual.”

But don’t think Newcastle Ghost Tours are just for ghost lovers, if you’re a non-believer you can still learn a thing or two on the tour. “Newcastle has a really interesting history right from the very first settlement in 1804,” she says.

“There are interesting stories behind everywhere we go on our tour so we stop at historic places and talk a lot about who was there, what they did, what their life was like and how they passed.”

16

Yak Magazine - October 2012

Renata frequently teams up with Boo! Paranormal for investigations. Boo! Paranormal is an organisation, that inspects homes and businesses after supernatural activity has been reported. Co-founder Angela Walton has always been interested in paranormal activity and it runs in the family – her mother and sister are both psychics. She says that the investigations they run are always conducted from a scientific angle with the aim of ruling out any logical explanations before declaring something paranormal.

“When people have experienced paranormal activity in their homes and businesses, we go out there and try to validate what they’ve experienced and to show them that they aren’t going crazy,” Angela says.

“There are a lot of people who just want to believe that their place is haunted and they won’t listen to logic, but we take our equipment out there and test it. A lot of the time, the activity is caused by something man-made and isn’t paranormal at all, but sometimes we find things that can’t be explained and that is bloody exciting.”

Renata and Angela both emphasised how passionate they are about all things paranormal. For Angela, passion is what keeps her organisation going. “We do our service for free and don’t charge,” she says. “We conduct the investigations so that we can find out what’s on the other side. There’s no real proof that there’s life after death and I guess we’re just curious about it.”

So next time you witness something strange in your neighbourhood, don’t call Ghostbusters. Call Boo! Paranormal.

The top 6 haunted places in Newcastle: Maitland Gaol This place was the former home to murderers, serial killers, armed robbers and escape artists. The Gaol was in operation for 154 years and during that time there were 16 executions. Visitors have reportedly witnessed the ghost of an inmate rocking from side to side in the doorway of his cell.

Military barracks in Newcastle East According to the Sydney Morning Herald, Robert Young was a gentleman who worked for the Crown by whipping disobedient convicts and prostitutes in 1814. In four years, he inflicted more than 13,000 strokes on 275 crims. It’s rumoured that if you walk around the old military barracks in Newcastle East and you feel a pinch or a flick on your back, it’s Mr Young letting you know that he is still around.

Lemon Tree Passage Road In 2010, it was reported that superstitious motorists were trying to reach speeds of more than 180km/h on Lemon Tree Passage Road. It was believed that by reaching dangerous (and deadly) speeds, one could conjure the ghost of a 20-yearold motorcyclist who was killed in that area.

Christ Church Cathedral The Cathedral’s bell tower is rumoured to be haunted by a resident ghost. Dark figures have also been seen darting around the back of the Church near the cemetery.

Minmi Cemetery Minmi cemetery is rumoured to be one of Newcastle’s most haunted places. It’s reported that for several years a bright blue and white glow appeared in the cemetery leading many to believe that it was haunted.

Halloween activities Newcastle Ghost Tours are holding their first “Ghosts of the Past” fancy dress party on Halloween (Oct 31) at 7pm.

The party will be taking place at Monet’s restaurant on Watt Street. Owner/Operator Renata Brown says the evening is aiming to raise money for Newcastle East Public School. “It’s [the school’s] bicentennial in 2016 and they are planning to rebuild the old bell tower that used to be there,” she says.

“So we’re doing some fundraising to help them out.”

Tickets will be $60 per person and there are no zombies or vampires allowed.

Maitland Gaol is planning a psychic tour on Halloween starting at 8pm. According to Marney Winter, the Gaol’s Service Delivery Officer, you should prepare yourself for some truly mystifying tales. “We don’t guarantee any ghostly activity, but many visitors experience an eerie feeling,” Marney says. “If you’re lucky, there may be time for a palm reading or two at the end of the tour.” This tour is not available for children under 14 years and the cost is $35 per person.

Contact details: Newcastle Ghost Tours www.newcastleghosttours.com.au Tours start from $45 0411 357 519 Boo! Paranormal www.booparanormal.weebly.com Facebook – Boo! Paranormal Maitland Gaol www.maitlandgaol.com.au/

4936 6482

Tanilba House For more than 100 years, the ghost of a young lady wearing a long gown has been seen in the house. She has been seen looking out through French windows, at the doorway to the front parlour and sitting on the end of a bed.

Yak Magazine - May 2012

17

Designed by Jessica Rykers

Nick Turner sits down with the man who put the bar in Bar on the Hill.

F

or an eclectic bunch, it’s not too often that we here at Yak are in complete agreement on something. But when we sat down to decide which member of the UoN community we would feature in this issue, there was one name that was consistently brought up. A familiar face to many, but truly known by few, the perfect candidate was Hugh Gordon.

For those of you who have ever attended a gig at Bar on the Hill, or chosen lunchtime beers and acoustic entertainment in the Derkenne Courtyard over study, there’s a fair chance you would recognise Hugh ‘the man behind the music’ Gordon. Hugh is the Entertainment Logistics Assistant with UoN Services.

The born and bred Novocastrian has been a mainstay of the local music scene for over 20 years, whether this be through playing or producing live music.

Only a few minutes after sitting down to chat to the man himself, I quickly realised just how passionate he is about the entertainment industry. “I just love music,” Hugh says.

Hugh began his time here at the University of Newcastle as a student, studying to become a primary school teacher. He never completed his degree however, with his love for music simply getting in the way. “I was just too involved [in music],” he says. “I just kept playing in bands, and then I was able to eventually make a career out of it”.

During his time as a student, Hugh was President of the Student Association and was a major force behind the construction of Bar on the Hill in 1984. “I actually put the bar in the Bar on the Hill,” he says.

My respect for the man was already high, but after hearing this it’s fair to say that it soared to a new level.

In the early 90s, Hugh ventured overseas where he worked his way around Europe, performing six or seven nights per week. “I spent four summer seasons playing in the Alps of Austria. I also had a summer season on [the Greek island] Crete, and a summer season in Scandinavia,” he says.

Upon returning home, Hugh started getting involved more in the behind-the-scenes aspects of the industry. “When I came home, I couldn’t get enough work out of music. So I got a bit of experience doing sound,” he says. With a significant amount of practical knowledge already under his belt, Hugh studied the theoretical side of things to enhance his knowledge even more.

His role with UoN Services sees him operate their extensive range of sound equipment for small to medium gigs. On top of this, he also coordinates the lunchtime entertainment through organising the student performances we see here on campus.

For a man whose passion in life is music, it’s not surprising to know that Hugh never stops thinking of new ways to spread the love to others. His vision is to showcase the talented students (and even staff) of UoN in a cultural festival.

18

Yak Magazine - October 2012

“There’s just so much talent around the university, and to find a vehicle to show it off is a dream of mine.” And given the enthusiasm Hugh displays towards this idea, I have no doubt that it will soon become a reality.

s u k i h a i r d r e s s i n g™ ocean st newcastle

to receive 30% off your cut at suki hairdressing visit: suki.com.au/yak

conditions apply - see website for more details

By Rowena Grant

I

’ve never really liked horses. I’ve always liked the idea of being able to ride one and be a total boss, but that’s never happened for me. I can remember riding a camel as a child, but I don’t have any memory of riding a horse, or even a pony.

Plus, horses scare me. You can’t trust an animal with shoes.

Furthermore, you most definitely cannot trust an animal with shoes who NEVER takes their shoes off. They’re just waiting for that moment where you relax around them and BAM. Broken foot. Plus their kicks have extra force. Steel force. Bastards.

I never understood those girls in high school who were obsessed with horses either. I honestly don’t get it. Yes they are beautiful creatures, but to cover every single one of your books in them is just madness. But I suppose the same could have been said of Andrew G for me. He was babin’ back then.

Which brings me to other things I don’t like. My ex-boyfriend often exclaimed to me “You don’t like anything!” Just because I don’t like most fruit, some vegetables, and a lot of other things that most people like doesn’t mean I don’t like anything.

I mean, honestly, not everyone likes mangoes.

I also don’t understand how people go for runs. I’ve never been able to just run. I can walk, and walk quickly at that.

But running makes me want to cry, unless it has a purpose.

I can run when I play hockey, because I’m always running to get the ball or to stop other people from getting it. I can run

C U LTU R A L AWA K EN IN G S FEST IVA L

when someone is chasing me because, well, no one likes to be mugged. And recently, I’ve found that I can run when I have a dog running alongside me. This one I don’t understand. Is it because I feel like I am in competition with them? Or is it because I just love the look on their faces: tongue hanging out the side of their mouth, saliva streaming through the air, tail wagging, and the clear happiness of feeling the wind in their fur. It’s probably a combination of both. I am a competitive person after all.

But back to the point: when someone says they don’t like something, just accept it*. Otherwise they might not like you. *I really hope my Dad reads this. For God’s sake, Dad, I DON’T LIKE PEAS AND I NEVER BLOODY WILL.



Yak Magazine - October 2012

21

Designed by Jessica Charnley

Nick Turner waxes lyrical about UoN’s musical maestros.

Did you know that the University of Newcastle is home to two award-winning choirs? Yes, really. So when the opportunity arose to sing the praises of these two choral conglomerates, we jumped at the chance to find out a little bit more.

Newcastle University Choir The Newcastle University Choir are celebrating their 35th year of hitting the high notes (and the low ones as well) and are inviting staff, students and friends of the university to get involved and help them celebrate. The choir’s musical director, Chris Allan, has put the call out to anyone who would like to sing in their Christmas concert, which is to be held at the Great Hall on Sunday, December 9 at 2pm.

The choir performs a wide range of choral works, ranging from classical to jazz; contemporary to folk.

“I wouldn’t mind seeing them perform before I audition,” I hear you say. Well, you’re just in luck. The Newcastle University Choir is performing on Sunday, October 14 at the Great Hall from 2pm. The concert will see the choir swing into spring, performing a celebration of jazz classics with special guest Terence Koo and the Terence Koo Trio.

University of Newcastle Chamber Choir Following its inception in 1995, the University of Newcastle’s Chamber Choir has gone on to achieve both national and international fame. Comprising of both students and members of the local community, the choir most recently cemented their place amongst the world’s best, winning three silver medals at the World Choir Games in Cincinnati, USA. Battling against a number of decorated choral outfits, the Chamber Choir picked up medals in the Contemporary, Mixed Choir and Religious Music categories. Following on from this, they then headed to Canberra for the Australian National Eisteddfod, where they were awarded first prize in the Open Sacred, Contemporary Choral, and Australia-Britain categories.

It’s been a huge couple of months for the 40-strong choir and their director, Dr Phillip Matthias. “After Cincinnati, the best in the world know who we are and are excited to see more,” Dr Matthias said. “Now we have something to aspire [towards] – winning the next World Choir Games in Latvia, 2014.”

The Choir’s repertoire is wide-ranging, from the Renaissance through to the 21st Century. So if you think you might have what it takes to join the Chamber Choir, auditions are held each Wednesday between 5.30-7.30pm.

For more information on the University of Newcastle Chamber Choir, contact Phillippa Miskiewicz: Phillippa.Miskiewicz@newcastle.edu.au

22

Yak Magazine - October 2012

“Trough-gate” – The Tale of the Tola Memorial Trough

W

hen asked this month to investigate one of the more high-traffic locations on Callaghan campus, I, being of the fairer sex, lacked the necessary equipment to stake out the location myself.

Luckily, the Woodward to my Bernstein, UoN History and Heritage research assistant Scott Brewer, was more than happy to get the skinny on the Tola Memorial Trough (located in the men’s bathrooms near Mamaduke, for those of you who haven’t watered your weasel on it).

While Scott took to ground, attempting to find a visual on the trough for me and startling one poor international student trying to drain his dragon in the process, I went directly to the source. One phone call to Newcastle Council’s bewildered switchboard guy later, and I was well on my way to discovering the man behind the myth.

Although slightly surprised I tracked him down, Chris Tola was not completely taken aback. Despite the fact he is now 53 and holds down a respectable job, friends who work at the university still inform him whenever they give his commemorative plaque the one-eyed salute. As well as

sporting a porn star ‘stache and being an all-round hell raiser back in the ‘80s, Chris used to be the president of the Union Board. Although the minutes from that rather auspicious board meeting where the Tola trough came into being in ‘86 are missing, Chris was more than happy to fill in the gaps.

Union Board meetings used to be much more ‘lubricated’ than what they are now. It was at one of these meetings that fellow board member and ridiculous facial hair sporter Chris Craig put forward a motion to commemorate all of the hard work Tola had been doing. At this time, the uni was going through a massive restructure and buildings were starting to get their names. As most of the buildings had already been named, General Manager John Broughton put forward an appropriate alternative. A motion was moved (excuse the pun) to place the Tola Memorial Trough in Stan’s Bar (now Mamaduke), making Chris the only undergrad student at the University of Newcastle to ever have his name on anything and a legend around campus. I should reevaluate my grand scheme to get my name on a building and try for a porcelain throne instead. In fact, I already have one in mind…

By Katie Burgess

Shake it Out

D

eep in the bowels of the HPE Building (that mysterious and wondrous building next to The Forum), there lies a machine of such magnificence that I have run out of mind-blowing adjectives to describe it.

It’s shiny, it’s got leads, and it hooks up to a computer. (Okay, so maybe that’s not the best bit about it. But wait, there’s more). It has golden feet that you stand on. It has handles that you hold. It is one of the best ways for you to get your fitness on track. It is the Inbody720.

While my mediocre description above cannot do this beautiful machine the justice it deserves, it truly is an amazing resource that our researchers have access to at the University of Newcastle.

When using the machine, one stands on it and has a bioimpedance analysis.

The Inbody720 sends a small, undetectable current through the subject’s body which measures the hydration status of the individual. This means it can work out which parts of your body are muscle mass and which are fat mass due to the water levels in the different components.

In conjunction with this, a researcher combines a regular physical assessment of weight, height and waist circumference before giving the subject their results.

The beauty of it is that it gives you rock solid results and lets you see exactly how much fat you have on your body – regardless of what your weight is.

After having a go of the Inbody720, in eight weeks my weight has barely changed but my muscle mass and fat percentage dramatically differ. It lets you know what you’re doing is working.

So what research is this machine used for? Elroy Aguiar, a PhD student at UoN is looking at the prevention of Type 2 diabetes in men. His study began in 2011 and looks at combining a program of diet and exercise aimed at weight loss.

Having been doing his research for two years, Elroy has already made great achievements and will be presenting at the Australian and New Zealand Obesity Society conference in New Zealand and will also be presenting at Be Active – the 4th International Congress on Physical Activity and Public Health in Sydney from October 31 to November 3 this year.

A lot of Elroy’s (and his fellow PhD candidates’) research would not have been possible without the Inbody720.

We thank you, kind machine.

By Ro we Jessic na Grant & a McA neney

Designed by Joshua Uren

veryone knows what The Beards burnt…so they’ll survive.” are about, perhaps cour tesy John Beardman Jr cites the largely of their hit single “You Should Lachie Leeming hears about the publicised failed apocalypses of Consider Having Sex With a upcoming time of reckoning for the yester year as to reasons why Bea rde d Ma n.” If the na me un-bearded with John Beardman Jr. beards must be cultivated. I is not explanator y enough for attempt to side with him, tentatively you, swing an uppercut at your throwing out the rhetorical question, “May as well probably hairless chin. I was still however taken back grow one, what have you got to lose right?” He doesn’t by the extent of The Beards’ commitment to living, breathing, spot the rhetorical part as he growls, “Your life.” and conveying the beard bible.

This was rather unnerving, so I endeavoured to manoeuvre I knew this interview would be different when I introduced the interview into less apocalyptical waters. myself to John Beardman Jr, who insisted that I refer to him by this name in its entirety throughout the interview. Afterwards I quiz him about the upcoming Australia-wide tour, their I would go back and count the amount of times the word biggest yet, and whether he has been practising anything to ‘beard’ and its variants were used in our brief chat – that number combat fatigue and health issues on the road. “As bearded being 43. This more than made up for the lack of beard-related men we are obviously very fit and healthy…a healthy beard words in my previous interviews, I felt. equals a healthy mind, as they say,” he offers.

There was no dilly-dallying around in regards to the purpose of this interview. It is not a publicity wind-up for The Beards upcoming Bar on the Hill show. Bearded men do not have hidden agendas, and it is with pure honesty that John Beardman Jr reveals the purpose behind their upcoming national tour: “This tour is about the end of the world for beardless people…basically we’ve discovered an ancient prophecy that predicts on December the 21st, 2012 everyone without a beard will be eliminated.”

Understandably, this statement is probably alarming for the masses of smooth-chinned effeminate sheep-men out there.

Having nursed a stubble most of my teenage life, I want to find out what exactly constitutes a beard and whether I will be spared. John Beardman Jr does not mince his words: “We like a real beard that goes sideburn to sideburn…after the apocalypse, anyone with stubble will probably be hideously

24

Yak Magazine - October 2012

With three beard-related albums churned out since the group’s formation in 2005, I enquire as to what hirsute ventures are on the horizon. “The problem we’re finding now is that it’s hard to find a word to rhyme with ‘beards’ that we haven’t already used…sometimes you look in the mirror, look at yourself with a beard…and you can just write a bunch of songs.”

Like a finely nurtured crop of facial hair, the legend of the apocalypse continues to grow. If you need more information on the tour, hit up the aptly named http:// theendoftheworldforbeardlesspeople.com/. But to truly appreciate the rays of unadulterated testosterone radiating from their beards, you need to grab yourself a front row seat at Bar on the Hill on October 24.

With the apocalypse for the un-grown quickly approaching, what have you got to lose?

Wayne’s World 2 (DVD) Schhhwing! Garth and Wayne are back in this sequel to the 1992 hit Wayne’s World.

After Wayne dreams about a ‘weird naked Indian’, the dysfunctional duo decides to stage a music festival. This film is packed with famous faces, 90s fashion and rock ‘n’ roll.

Although not as worthy as the first; Wayne’s World 2 gives us more party time (excellent!) with our favourite late-night cable access hosts. So grab a copy and get ready to head to Waynestock.

Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol (DVD) Tom Cruise’s fourth improbable mission has his team defending America from a nuclear attack. If you enjoy the format of the first three instalments, you will enjoy Ghost Protocol.

The action scenes are bigger, the stakes are higher and the mission more impossible than ever. Surprising moments of humour and sadness break the constant tension.

Warning! After watching this film I was so pumped that I wanted to throw a brick through my car window. You may be similarly affected.

“Walk on By”, “Raindrops Keep Fallin’ on my Head”, “(There’s) Always Something There to Remind Me”. There is no denying that when Hal David passed away in September, music lost a true talent.

This 1998 tribute to David and long-time collaborator Burt Bacharach brings together some of the big Australian artists of the day, performing some of the best-known songs in the world.

Yes, it’s different. Yes, these are probably songs your grandparents enjoy in their original form. But give it a chance. You might be surprised.

- Matthew Hatton

Battlestar Galactica was rushed into production in the late 70s following a popularity explosion in all things space driven by the success of Star Wars. It was amazingly camp and has since become something of a cult classic.

In 2004, the series was brought back to the small screen, reimagined not as a space opera, but more like The West Wing.

Except in space and without Aaron Sorkin’s preachy scripting. Simply, one of the best science fiction productions ever.

- Michelle Carratt

- Michelle Carratt

To Hal and Bacharach (CD)

Battlestar Galactica (DVD/Blu-ray/iTunes))

- Matthew Hatton

Darkside of the Moonshine

Tron: Legacy Reconfigured

(CD/ITUNES)

(CD/ITUNES)

If you thought that listening to Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon in its original form required some special…let’s call it “special assistance” then let me introduce you to Poor Man’s Whiskey and Dark Side of the Moonshine.

It’s fair to say that Tron: Legacy was not a fantastic film. However, the soundtrack (composed by electronic music duo, Daft Punk) is, frankly, brilliant. A mix of electronica and orchestrations, it is a real highlight of the film.

What they’ve done is take this classic album and reimagine it in the style of bluegrass.

It’s more than a little departure from the original, but it works and gives it a breath of fresh air.

In Reconfigured, we see that soundtrack taken and remixed by a variety of other electronic music groups from all corners.

From the mainstream (Moby) to things I’ve never heard of (Pretty Lights), Reconfigured is a great extension of the music written by Daft Punk.

- Matthew Hatton

- Matthew Hatton

5

to Spring Clean!

Winter has finally come to end and spring is the season of new beginnings. Here are some ideas that will inspire a fresh start:

Your wardrobe is the perfect place to begin your spring cleaning. I have accumulated so many clothes over the past few years, some of which still even have tags attached to them, and we all have that one garment that represents a bad night out that we cannot bring ourselves to wear again.

Instead of leaving those old or unwanted clothes lingering in your wardrobe, donate them to charity. Helping those less fortunate will feel good and perhaps replace any feeling of wastefulness.

Clear your mind of negative thoughts. It seems simple, but unfortunately negative thoughts can sometimes sneak in without us even realising. This spring, give yourself a chance to truly appreciate everything around you. While we cannot change the past, we are able to learn valuable life lessons from any experience. Thoughts become things, and positive thinking will only attract more good things into your life.

“I forgot to go to the gym today…that’s five days in a row now.” Sound familiar? During the cold winter months it is so tempting to stay cuddled up indoors. However spring provides us with beautiful weather and the excuses are no longer acceptable! Going to the gym can be expensive, but there are plenty of cost effective ways to get fit fast including walking along the beach or going for a bike ride. With 24 hours in every day, everyone can spare at least one hour for exercise. You can mix it in with socialising by asking a friend to be your workout partner.

It is important to surround yourself with positive people, those who lift you higher and make you a better person; and in turn you do the same for them. We all have busy schedules and it can sometimes be difficult to catch-up with even your closest friends. You need to ensure that you are spending your valuable time on people who truly deserve it.

It feels as though this semester is flying by, and the amount of work is mounting up. While it does take less effort to watch television for an hour (or five), try soaking up the glorious spring sun and getting those weekly readings (that just somehow never get done) out of the way.

Academic Integrity Module, are you really teaching me academic integrity?

R

ecently, as a compulsory part of every course, I had to complete my annual Academic Integrity Module.

During this time I was asked a series of questions that instilled absolutely no ideals of academic integrity upon me.

In fact, the only useful information was a short description of paraphrasing.

This module even went as far as to give me “0 out of 1” for rating their scenarios regarding the seriousness of academic integrity as 6/6, which is “very serious”, as opposed to the apparently correct 4, “quite serious”. Am I wrong for valuing the importance of ALL aspects of academic integrity as very important?

During the course of this module there were also a number of moral tests that require an extended response, all of which were obviously morally and academically incorrect.

Surely instead of asking our response to questions that have a clear intended answer it would be more beneficial to create a small quiz that generates new questions when one is answered incorrectly.

For example, instead of being asked why I should not give my assignment to a classmate who has overworked themselves and neglected sufficient time for their own work, would it not be more beneficial to ask a question that I have to get right to continue? There are also some comprehension-based pieces in the module, ironically the most beneficial sections of the whole test.

I personally believe that completing a more realistic Academic Integrity Module, complete with more comprehension-based testing should be introduced. To ensure that people complete it to the highest standard, perhaps an incentive should be attached? Or maybe even a small percentage of the overall course mark?

Those who argue that you cannot assess people on something detached from the specific academic area that they are studying should consider the importance of acting ethically when completing assignments. All was well last year, when my innocent first year mind scoffed at the module. However, now that I have an appreciation for the time and effort that goes into writing for an academic audience, I feel the need for this mindset to be instilled on a larger scale.

Overall I might be nit-picking, but it seems fruitless to ask so many questions that require very little thought. Either academic integrity is a big deal, and it should be tested more rigorously, or it is unimportant and should not waste 40 minutes of my day. There is no room for a half-way house.

Yak Magazine - September 2012

By Brittany Turner

By Richard Baines

This month, we chatted to a few future students of UoN during August’s Open Day. ANNELIESE

QUESTIONS:

Age: 21 Movie: Night of the Living Dead.

Study: I’m actually a current student and I’m doing a Bachelor of Visual Communication Design in the hopes that I’ll be a graphic designer.

> What’s your favourite scary movie? > What degree are you thinking about studying next year?

Looking Forward To: To be honest I’m not the biggest fan of uni, but I guess it’s better than work.

> What are you looking forward to about coming to uni?

Freebie: Chilli corn bread in the Derkenne Courtyard.

> What is the best freebie you’ve picked up today?

HANNAH

> Claire Young > Matt Hatton

Age: 17

EADON

Age: 16 Movie: Alien ?: ?

Study: Environmental Engineering.

Movie: I really hate scary movies so I don’t have a favourite – they give me really bad nightmares.

Looking Forward To: Learning new things and meeting new people

Study: Definitely something within the Science faculty, just not sure what yet.

Freebie: Probably the food

Looking Forward To: I’m looking forward to studying what I love and not everything that you have to study when you’re at school.

Freebie: I’ve got a lot of mints. They’re giving out packets of mints and I have heaps of packets.

ISABEL

Age: 16

NATALIE

Age: 22

Movie: I don’t like them.

They scare me.

Movie: I don’t really watch many ?: ?: ?? scary movies, I’m not a fan at all.

Study: Psychology

Study: Nursing

Looking Forward To: I’m really excited about studying the behaviour of people.

Looking Forward To: I’m already a nurse so I’m just getting more education but I’m looking forward to the social side of uni.

Freebie: I like the 30% off travel discount and I got a free cup of coffee.

Freebie: Stress balls – I think they’re preparing us for uni already.