August/September 2012
Note from the Editor D
istractions. They are a dream killer and pathway to personal procrastination. Yet, today, the world is full of distraction from what is truly important for the foundational growth of our families. One of the most important milestones in life that is overshadowed by gadgets, video games, and TV, is the basic need for reading. Did you know? Children who can’t read on grade level by the end of third grade are four times more likely to not graduate high school (Source: www.aecf.org). Every student who doesn’t graduate high school costs society an estimated $260,000 in lost earnings, taxes and productivity (Source: www.aecf.org). Studies show children who don’t graduate high school earn 40% less annually than peers who do graduate, and at least a whopping 100% less annually than those who earn a bachelor’s degree (Source: www.aecf.org). Yet, all of the above can be prevented simply by parents and caregivers reading to their children every day. Yes, we’re all busy and yes, we’re all tired, but we have to make time and commit to making reading a part of our family lifestyle. And don’t worry, you’re not alone, Urban Parenting is here to help. Part of our mission at Urban Parenting Magazine is to empower families to take ownership of the importance of reading through our Read UP Campaign (Visit www. UrbanParentingMagazine.com for fun reading ideas). Maybe you start with picture books and move up to chapter books, maybe you take your child to the library weekly or even have an older sibling read to the younger children. No matter how or when, the crucial point is that you are spending quality time with your children doing something that will benefit them for the rest of their lives- building a love for and ability to read.
Debbie Manigat
Editor-in- Chief | Urban Parenting Magazine
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Contents MAGAZINE TEMPLATE LAYOUT 02
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www.yourdomain.com Issue 02 - Spring 2012
H E R E
CUT CALORIES WHILE YOU CELEBRATE!
HOLIDAYS ARE HERE
10 DESIGN MEMORIES
PLAY & WIN!
12 02 06 10 12 16 20 22
EDITORS NOTE It’s time to go
back to the basic and ignite a love for reading with our families.
THE HOLIDAYS are upon us...
How to welcome family and not go insane.
AVOID HOLIDAY weight gain,
say no, no, no to sweets! Or at least limit to sneaking only 3...
DAZZLING DECORATIONS.
Add a splash of color this season and your family will thank you!
ERIC THOMAS: inspires parents
to hold down the new battle field, the Home.
GOBBLE, GOBBLE, gifts! Answer the Turkey Trot Quiz for cool prizes.
READ UP: One Moore Book
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spotlights international stories that make your kids smile.
BLACK FRIDAY
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THENOTORIOUS BLACK Friday:
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Are you brave enough to go out this holiday season?
STOP MOMMY: It’s okay to take a break and get back to you. You deserve it!
HEALTHY. HAPPY. Hair. Grab some Natural hair do’s and don’ts to shine on this Holiday Season! PLAN AHEAD for fun! Try to add
in these activites for a memorable holiday this year.
BRAND UP: Align your business with a movement to empower families
STOP MOMMY!
pages
Full of absolute dynamic
creative content!
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www.yourdomain.com “Information changes Situations...” -Eric Thomas, The “Hip-Hop Preacher”
Issue 02 - Spring 2012
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Urban Parenting Magazine
PARENTING SURVIVAL GUIDE: ERIC THOMAS
Published 11 times a year by Urban Parenting Magazine LLC., in West Palm Beach, FL. Editorial submissions and reader correspondence are welcome. We reserve the right to edit, reject or comment on any material submitted. We are not responsible for the return of unsolicited material. Urban Parenting Magazine is available online and at numerous locations within diverse communities free of charge. Publication and distribution of the magazine does not constitute an endorsement of information, products or services. The publisher reserves the right to reject any advertisement or listing which is not in keeping with the magazine’s standards. Copyright 2013. All rights reserved. Any reproduction in whole or in part is prohibited without written permission.
Publisher Wilson Manigat
16 NATURAL HOLIDAY HAIR
Editor-in-Chief Debbie Manigat Founded by Wilson and Debbie Manigat in 2013
How to Contact Us Website: UrbanParentingMagazine.com
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Email: info@urbanparentingmagazine. com Office: (954) 560-8326 Correspondence: Urban Parenting Magazine P.O. Box 222911 West Palm Beach FL 33422
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The
Holidays
Are Upon Us... Learn how not to burn with anger when dealing with ill-mannered or rude relatives.
D
o difficult relatives ruin your holidays year after year? I knew of an individual who proclaimed a few weeks before Thanksgiving that the family gathering would be ruined as usual because of her sister-in-law, husband, and meddlesome nephew. She had a defeatist attitude plus she figuratively put on full battle gear ready to go to war with these despicable in-laws. I reminded them from previous conversations that you can’t change the other person, but by changing how you approach this person, you could get a more favorable response. I explained that the minute they walked in the door they would sense their hostility and react accordingly. I suggested that they pretend this is the first time they are meeting. Welcome them into her home and as the hostess, keep the conversation light. At the same time, they can make wise decisions based on their experience with the misbehaving nephew. They have the right to set boundaries and enforce them if the parents don’t. What could she do differently this time since he didn’t listen previously to not touch the computer? This individual decided to remove the keyboard from the computer. She also denied him access to the hot tub, which he had damaged the previous year. I asked her why she went along with the suggestion that she have Thanksgiving at her house each year when both she and her husband had
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to work the day before and after the holiday. Her explanation was that her relatives expected it. Does that mean she is stuck in a rut forever? No! I asked if she had considered going out to dinner. There are plenty of places now where you can have a tasty turkey dinner and more. She agreed that the concept sounded like a great solution. Well, she did succeed in letting go of her battle gear and having a good time. The in-laws responded favorably to her relaxed body language, and having to control the obnoxious nephew was much easier because both her and her husband enforced the boundaries. They turned a deaf ear to his constant whining. However, the next year, she and her husband decided to recapture the
Survival Tips: Welcome family , Stay positive, Smile always, and Keep conversations light.
sation to things she has been doing. Sincerely compliment her on her accomplishments, no matter how small. She just wants to feel needed and appreciated. If she offers to help, by all means accept it! Visual: John is frustrated with his life. It’s just not turning out the way he had envisioned it. Subconsciously he wants you to feel as frustrated as he is. He might attack ideas with “No, it’ll never work.” Or he might slip into a funk and use the silent treatment: “If you don’t know what’s bothering me, I’m not going to tell you”. Either of those actions can frustrate you! Remedy: Realize it’s a game to control you. Keep that smile on your face when you say, “I’m really sorry, John, that you aren’t having a good day. Hope you feel better soon”. Then walk away. If it’s at the dinner table, change the subject or turn your attention to someone else.
pleasure of the holiday by announcing to the family that they were not going to have Thanksgiving dinner at their house. They were going out to eat. Eventually someone else volunteered- the in-laws she disliked! All she had to do was bring a dessert. The nephew was happy because he was in his own house and everyone had a good time. So avoid the drama- here are specific examples of how hot buttons are pushed based on the four perceptual styles: Audio, Feeler, Visual, and Wholistic. In each instance the person is operating through his or her Limiting Tendencies rather than Empowering Tendencies. Therefore they are reactive and hope to get a reaction from you. Following each example is a remedy for defusing the situation. Audio: Uncle Bob is always argumentative. He claims he is just playing the Devil’s Advocate. But eventually it triggers a shouting match because he is also sarcastic. Uncle Bob wants to evoke a reaction because simmering beneath the surface is anger and he’s looking for a way to vent. Once you react, he’s won! He now has an
excuse to shout and to intimidate you. He uses his temper to control others. Remedy: When you start seeing red, take a deep breath and assess the situation. If you can leave the room, do so to calm down. There is always a reason to go into the kitchen, whether it’s to check on the food or to get a glass of water. If you feel you would be deserting the guests if you got up and went into the kitchen, change the subject. If appropriate, tell a joke to get everyone laughing is a great way to defuse the situation. Feeler: Aunt Jane enjoys being the martyr. The driving force behind her indignation is, “After all I’ve done for you and this is all the appreciation I get?” So she will tell you her tale of woe or all of her worries. Her subconscious goal is for you to feel sorry for her and maybe even wallow with her in her self-pity...misery does love company! Remedy: Sometimes just quietly listening to her is all she needs. She wants to pour out all her problems and worries. Then steer the conver-
Wholistic: For years Chris has expressed resentment that she hasnít gotten her just rewards. She should have gotten that promotion, but then what do you expect? There is a glass ceiling for women! This resentment triggers irritability and moodiness. So sometimes Chris goes off and sulks. With a sour look on her face she withdraws from the others. She secretly likes the thought that others might be wondering what’s her problem. Good, let them wonder. When she joins the others for the holiday dinner, she manipulates the conversation so she can impose her opinion about why life isn’t fair. Remedy: Let her sulk. It’s not your problem! Otherwise when she becomes negatively opinionated, you can quickly defuse the situation by saying, “You are entitled to your opinion. You brought up some points that I will have to think about”. End of conversation! Even though you disagree, don’t get into an argument with her. You will not win! If you believe certain relatives will ruin the holiday again because they always do, you’re setting yourself up for failure. You’ll get what you anticipate. So throw away the battle gear and bring out the good cheer. It is possible to have “Happy Holidays.” PAGE
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MAGAZINE TEMPLATE LAYOUT 02 www.yourdomain.com Issue 02 - Spring 2012
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High Performance Strategy
Ducimpor si simusam aut ut aceped mi, es simillesti volestrum aut eaquia nulluptatem illuptaqui noneture de omnist derci aut omnis aut explatis. BY JOHN SMITH
Above: It’s never too late to change your habits, and by establishing a healthy lifestyle now, you’ll continue to reap the rewards in the future. Discover the facts behind nutrition so you can make informed choices, understand how BMI, or body mass index, affects you, or take part in our six-week diet and exercise programme.
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Avoid
Holiday Weight Gain...
5 Easy Tips to Cut Out Extra Pounds this Season of Merriment.
I
f you’re worried about gaining weight over the holidays you’re not alone. This results in more calories than Accept the fact that you’re going The average North American gains 7 to 12 you body needs and you guessed to indulge a bit - and then enjoy pounds over the Thanksgiving and Christmas it excess pounds. it! But make sure you make up for holidays. But it doesn’t have to be that way. it elsewhere by increasing your Models and celebrities all know exercise. Follow these simple holiday diet tips and about the powerful slimming tricks and you’ll avoid the holiday weight gain effects of drinking water which is You don’t have to double your that afflicts so many other people: why you often see them holding exercise time or sweat till you fall a bottle of water in their hands off your treadmill. Just increase your #1 Drink Water - and Lots of It. as they dash through airports or exercise time a bit every day, maybe stand around at fashion shows. ten minutes here, fifteen minutes Boring I know - but the reason this tip there. It all adds up. stays around year after year is because it #2 Increase Your Exercise works. Adequate water intake keeps your A Little Bit Every Day You’ll burn off those holiday treats metabolism humming along at a maximum and easily avoid extra weight gain. rate and staves off hunger cravings as well. Everyone deserves to indulge in I have several girlfriends who have holiday treats. Part of the fun of been doing this trick for years and In fact many people mistake thirst for hunger the holiday season is the amazing they never gain a pound over the and end up eating to quench their thirst. treats that are only around at holidays (in fact they often lose a Christmas and/or Thanksgiving. few!). PAGE
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I read somewhere that Jessica Simpson never denies herself any of her favorite foods - but she only allows herself one or two bites. And let’s face it the first couple of bites are the best tasting anyways! #5 Don’t Eat After 7:00 pm Experts tell us that the earlier in the day food is eaten, the more likely it is to be burned off. However when you eat late at night, this food is more likely to be stored as fat. Celebrities like Oprah use this knowledge to their advantage and refuse to eat after a certain time like 7:00 p.m. So if you know you absolutely must have a sweet indulgence during the day, try to have it before noon. Then towards the end of the day, snack on healthy, lower carb foods like salads, vegetable broth, fruits or lean protein.
#3 Cut Back Where You Can At Other Meals Did you know that the average number of calories consumed by one person during a typical Thanksgiving dinner is 7,100! That’s about 2 pounds strictly in terms of calories alone. But not to worry. All you have to do is make small calorie cutbacks at other meals the week before and you’ll easily make up for the extra calories. For example, instead a huge slice of pecan pie (which normally will run you about 500 calories) for desert, why not try some blueberries mixed with low fat yogurt?
Instead of the bag of potato chips you usually indulge in for the big game, why not munch on air-popped, low fat popcorn? You can save as much as 500 calories and you’re still having a salty, satisfying snack. Bottom line: cut back where you can in little ways. You won’t miss the little sacrifices and you can then enjoy your holiday meals - guilt free!
This keeps your metabolism elevated but won’t pack on the pounds. I’ve personally used this trick before every holiday Christmas party for 5 years running and it certainly helps for getting into those slinky Christmas party dresses! So those are 5 diet tips to avoid holiday weight gain this year. Follow them and you’re guaranteed to save yourself the stress of unwanted weight gain. Heck, you’ll probably even lose a few pounds, all in time for New Year’s Eve!
#4 Eat What You Like - But Only A Few Bites If you absolutely cannot imagine giving up any of your favorite treats this holiday season, give yourself permission to have a bite of everything - but only a bite!
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Dazzling Thanksgiving Decorations: This year take the time to decorate your home in honor of this very special holiday. Thanksgiving is a time in which we remember the people in our lives that are special to us. This year take the time to decorate your home in honor of this very special holiday.
Buy several pillar candles in one solid color and place each on silk fall leaves. Group your candles in various heights and place a few nuts or small gourds at the base of the candles for a special fall look.
You can show your friends and family just how much they mean to you this Thanksgiving season. Here are a few decorations that will make this Thanksgiving one that will be remembered for many years to come.
Decorate your Thanksgiving buffet table with fresh fruits, vegetables, and nuts in brass or silver bowls and baskets. You can also use artificial fruits and vegetables if you want to keep your beautiful buffet table in place for several weeks or the entire month.
Make your Thanksgiving table a thing of beauty with a table runner with gold, browns, or burnt orange colors. Emboss the table runner with stamps in fruit and nut shapes or use iron-on decals to decorate your table runner.
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Make garlands from leaves, fruits, berries, and fall colored ribbons to hang from doorways and any place you would normally hang a Christmas garland.
You can also purchase bundles of wheat and tie wide, wire-edged ribbon around the center and hang from your fireplace and on doors. Make place cards for every member of the family and any other visitors you may be entertaining and include a note to each written inside the place card of why you are thankful for that person and what they mean in your life. Your guests and family members will be touched by your thoughtfulness and the effort you made to make them feel special. Think of all the places you decorate with reds and greens at Christmas and instead place fall colors and Thanksgiving decorations that you can purchase in your local discount or hobby store. These simple ideas will transform your house and make your guests thankful for you.
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Feature Story | By Debbie Manigat
Parenting Survival Tips with Eric Thomas
The new
Battle Field...
LOVE . PAIN . SACRAFICE . PARENTING .
Fear is a disabling mindset that can halt your divine purpose and be transferred from generation to generation.”- Eric Thomas (ET), Educator, Author, Motivational Speaker Fear. It’s a crippling condition that can destroy any man, woman, and dream. It can stall governments, ruin communities, and even more disconcerting, it can destroy families. When fear gets an opportunity to gnash at your core, it’s like a malignant cancer feeding on your cells, sucking out your soul, and leaving you in darkness. It’s the closet experience to mental and emotional death because it changes your outlook on life, your viewpoint on resiliency, and your ability to parent. When fear becomes a factor for your family, the home front is under attack and you need new tools to survive. Eric Thomas (ET), educator, author, motivational speaker, and creator of the highly captivating Youtube series “Thank God It’s Monday”, shares his personal parenting tips to hold down the family, be prepared in any battle for success, and how he almost let his fears chain him to a past of pain. “The new me would tell the old me, stop being so angry, your inability to forgive is stopping you… stop being afraid to learn, go places you’ve never gone, and do things you’ve never
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“ I teach parents that their presence matter more than their presents... Information changes situations...“
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Eric has lived a life of challenges and triumph but has found a way to break the cycle. At age 16, defiant and hardheaded, Eric decided to leave home and drop out of school, choosing to live on the streets of Detroit. By divine intervention at age 17, Eric met a pastor who saw him a young man with tremendous unrealized potential. As a result, their mentoring relationship was born which led Eric to complete his GED and to prepare for college. Determined not to be another statistic, Eric enrolled at Oakwood University, then Michigan State University and the rest is well priceless history, he now holds a Master’s Degree and is working on his Doctorate in Education Administration. Once ET understood that he had control over his battlefield, ET used his brain to fight and found the strength to combat fear, a generational cycle of illiteracy, fatherlessness, and homelessness. He changed his life and created a legacy of success for his self and more importantly, his family. Each day, he strives to be the man and father he wished he had growing up and today family is at the heart of his ministry. “I teach parents that their physical presence matters more than presents and I teach students that information changes situations.” ET’s story is inspiration that your home and your life is what you make it. He is celebrating 23 years of marriage to his high school sweetheart DeDe Mosely and they work together tirelessly to empower their children, Jalin, 18 and Jayda, 15
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Parenting Survival Guide: Iron Sharpens Irons. “The birth of my son changed my life. I was married to my wife for five years and then we had our first child, yet what makes our story so great is that after being a high school dropout, going back to school, getting my degree, I had an opportunity to then cheer on my son as he walked graduated from high school and walked across the same stage that I did for my college degree.” - ET In the September issue of Urban Parenting Magazine, we focused on uplifting and analyzing the state of black families today. Staggering facts were addressed: · Married couples head on 46% of black families · 70% of all black children are born out of wedlock · 85% of black children do not live with their fathers present in the home · 62% of black families are headed by a single parent · Only 15- 20% of black children born today will grow up with 2 parents until age 16 · Over 80% of long term poverty occurs in broken or never married homes · 70% of African American boys in the criminal justice system come from fatherless homes.
We found these statistics to be an inaccurate and negative portrait of the black family today and asked ET to share his formula for a successful marriage and parenting generation Z. “Get busy living. This is your life. You set a standard. You set the benchmark. Give your children a new normal… My marriage is my mirror and my wife always says that you can be better, be obsessed with improvement… so I ask myself the following questions to make sure I’m being the best man and father I can be.”- ET
ET: The DETRIOT LIONS! UPmag: Most embarrassing moment? ET: Dad came to school with a belt because I was cutting up and I didn’t get over that for two weeks.
ET’s Family Survival test: Have fun, reflect and see where you stand as a parent: Am I practicing what I’m preaching? Am I authentic? Am I serving my wife (husband)? Do my children see a man of integrity? Am I faithful to my wife? Am I loyal to my children? Do they say my dad loves the world, more than he loves me? Now, we all know that parenting is not perfect and takes lots of patience, but if you got less than 5 then you are considered in survival mode and need to get some support. Try joining a local parenting group, taking parenting classes, or work on building your lifeline. “Every parent should have a lifeline, there is no manual to parenting, (parents) need a group of people they can call and get help…”ET (Check out our parenting resources and highlights on parenting classes in your community at www.UrbanParentingMagazine. com.)
UPmag: What inspires ET? ET: Fans post on my Twitter or YouTube page how they were going to commit suicide but then they saw his video and changed their mind… I also love Denzel movies and watching Serena Williams play tennis. She’s incredible! UPmag: What’s next for ET?
The Rundown: One-on-One with Mr. TGIM
ET: I hope to win the Nobel Peace Prize one day and help reshape and reform the American school system.
Fun Facts about ET the Hip Hop Preacher
For more information on Eric Thomas, please visit: www.ETinspires.com
UPmag: Dad’s Guilty Pleasure?
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The Turkey Trot Fifteen multiple choice trivia questions about Thanksgiving holiday history and traditions. Complete and send answers to Info@UrbanParentingMagazine.com for a chance to win cool prizes!
1. Most folks know that Americans celebrate a Thanksgiving Day, but they aren’t alone. What event is celebrated in The Virgin Islands on Oct. 25? A. A Thanksgiving Day to rejoice in the end of the hurricane season B. A Thanksgiving Day to celebrate the end of the harvest season C. A Thanksgiving Day to mark the beginning of the harvest season D. There is no such event except in The QuizQueen’s imagination.
4. Who originally domesticated the turkey? A. The Turks B. The Mexicans C. The Chinese D. The Vulcans 5. What month is National Turkey Lovers’ Month? A. May B. June C. November D. December 6. Benjamin Franklin, who proposed the turkey as the official United States’ bird, was dismayed when the bald eagle was chosen over the turkey. Why? A. He loved to eat turkey and wanted everyone to PAGE
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2. Where did turkeys come from? A. Turkey B. Europe C. South America D. Antarctica 3. Thanksgiving is also a legal holiday in Canada. When does it fall? A. Second Monday in October B. Second Thursday in October C. Second Monday in November D. Second Thursday in November
love it, too B. He thought the turkey much more respectable C. He said the bald eagle had a bad moral character D. The turkey was a true native of America E. All are true F. None are true G. A, B, and C are true H. B, C, and D are true 7. What Thanksgiving Day image can be traced back to ancient harvest festivals? A. Candle B. Cornucopia C. Pilgrim hat D. Turkey
8. Can turkeys fly? A. Only the domestic ones B. Only the wild ones C. All turkeys can fly D. No turkeys can fly 9. Although the U.S. is tops when it comes to turkey consumption (who knows if it is Thanksgiving that puts us over the top), what country is a close second? A. France B. Italy C. Germany D. UK
10. Although often linked to Christmas, Kwanzaa is actually more closely tied with which holiday? A. St. Patrick’s Day B. Halloween C. Thanksgiving D. Valentine’s Day 11. When Neil Armstrong and Edwin Aldrin sat down to eat their first meal on the moon, their foil food packets contained what? A. Roasted turkey and all of the trimmings B. Spaghetti and meatballs C. Hot dogs and beans D. Peanut butter and jelly 12. What Jewish holiday could be associated with Thanksgiving? A. Shabuoth B. Passover C. Hanukah D. Yom Kippur
13. Who gobbles in the turkey family? A. Everyone B. Only adult turkeys, not chicks C. Only tom turkeys D. Only hen turkeys
15. What is the turkey trot? A. A ragtime dance B. The gait of a horse C. A card game D. The way a turkey runs
14. The custom of watching football games on Thanksgiving Day also evolved during the early decades of the 20th century. Many Americans digest their holiday meal while watching football games on television. Traditionally, which two National Football League (NFL) teams host games on Thanksgiving Day? A. Detroit Lions and Dallas Cowboys B. Carolina Panthers and Miami Dolphins C. Jacksonville Jaguars and Cincinnati Bengals D. Houston Oilers and Cleveland Browns
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READ UP: One Moore Book Urban Parenting sits down with author Wayétu Moore Wayétu Moore, raised in Spring, TX--a suburb north of Houston. “I graduated from Howard University with a degree in journalism and from University of Southern California with my Master’s degree in creative writing”. UPmag: What made you want to start your company? WM: I’m Liberian and have always had an interest in creating literature that featured Liberian culture and people and other minority and underrepresented cultures in the larger literary industry. After graduate school I wrote a children’s book called J is for Jollof Rice and asked my sister, who is a painter, to illustrate it. I did 15 months worth of research and fundraising, hired four of my siblings to join my team, and launched our publishing company in January 2011 with the goal of publishing and distributing children’s books that featured underrepresented cultures. UPmag: What was the start up process like and how long have you been in operation? PAGE
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country the rare opportunity to see their culture immortalized in literature.
a love for reading in their children? WM: My family wasn’t raised with much, but one constant in my upbringing was a love for education. Books were all over our house. Growing up my dad would say things like: “knowledge is power”
Education, reading empower individuals, yes--but also entire communities, entire countries. UPmag: Which story is your favorite? WM: That’s impossible to name. They are all so important and special.
WM: We’ll be 3 years old in January. To start the business, I gathered people who I knew would support my dream and nurture it into fruition--my siblings. I did quite a bit of research on various aspects of publishing-printing, design and distribution. UPmag: What are your books about? What makes stories different or unique? WM: Our stories spotlight the lives of children who are rarely featured in children’s books. Each series of books features one country, so the experience gives the Western reader a look at foods, places and names of countries they may not have an opportunity to closely study in school; and it gives the reader in our featured
UPmag: Kids have so many outlets vying for their attention, how do you catch their eye to focus on reading? WM: Children will always love a good story. During the developmental years, the imagination seeks stories as a way to frame the world. We have to create characters and storylines in books that are relative to a more diverse pool of early learners. When I worked as an elementary school literacy instructor in DC, one way I encouraged my students to read was to offer them books that included them--books where they saw themselves and could therefore imagine themselves and their futures in a larger international context.
and “remember the victors write history.” He convinced my siblings and I that not only would a solid education afford us anything we wanted, but he also led us to believe that said education put us in control not only of our stories, but of the narratives and perceived truths of our people. Education, reading empower individuals, yes--but also entire communities, entire countries. The prospect gives me chills. UPmag: What is your goal or hope for your organization? WM: I want to publish 2 series a year for as long as possible, and double our capacity in a few years. I’d like to use One Moore Book as an engine to raise awareness about the need for culturally sensitive children’s literature. UPmag: Where can readers find your books? WM: Our books can be found on our website at www.onemoorebook. com/bookstore and Amazon.com.
UPmag: What advice can you give to parents on why its important to instill PAGE
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Black Friday Top 10 Tips for a Successful Black Friday Minus the Stress!
B
lack Friday is by far the biggest shopping day of the year. Prices are cheap and people start out as early as 4 AM. This year there will be many great deals on gadgets and electronics. Plan ahead and create a winning strategy and you might be able to save a few hundred dollars on your holiday shopping. Here are 10 tips for making Black Friday successful:
1. Show up early! Seriously, many of the stores that have massive sales will sell out fast. The whole purpose of having super cheap items is to get a ton of people in the door. Then, once they sell all of a particular item the plan is for you to buy a more expensive item. Let me explain this again... Get their early, but c’mon, there is no need to camp out in front of CompUSA with your uncle’s moldy tent. 2. Keep an eye on the prices of items that are not on sale. Many times these items will be over priced to compensate for the super cheap advertised items. If the store that you are shopping at has run out of the advertised item, make sure you don’t over-spend on a similar product. 3. Beware of cheap brands. Sure, you may be able to find a DVD recorder for $60 but it is made in a country that you have never heard of and will probably break before you finish recording the “Family Matters” marathon. A couple of years ago I stocked up on cheap DVD players and their life span was about 3 months. 4. Make a list of people you are shopping for. If you are like many other people, you will not only be trying to score a great deal for yourself, you will also be shopping for others. Spend some time before the big day to make a list of people who you will be shopping for. Next to their name, include a budget and a gift idea. Make sure you keep this list handy while you are strolling through the stores.
5. Make a list of specific items that you MUST have from the ads. Most black friday advertisements come out on Thanksgiving day. As you browse through the paper, circle the items that you think will sell out and grab those first thing in the morning. You don’t want to lie to your 8 year old son on Christmas morning and tell him that Santa ran out of Gameboys...he WILL catch on. 6. Don’t overlook the DVDs and CDs for great gifts. Stores such as Wal-Mart should have a few bins of super cheap new releases. Everyone loves movies and music, so take advantage of this cheap-o gift selection and snag as many as you can for the holiday. Trust me, nobody wants another red turtleneck for Christmas! 7. File rebates AS SOON as you get home. Black Friday is known for having tons of rebates. Some products have 4-5 rebates attached to them so make sure you are fully aware of all rebate porchases. Trust me, you will feel like a complete dweeb when you are in need of $200 in the new year and realize that you never sent in any of your rebates. Do it ASAP! 8. Be aware of your store’s price matching policy. Many stores will honor the sale price if you bought the item a couple days before. You can simply purchase your items in advance and then simple show up to the customer service area and request a price match...it’s that simple. 9. Create a winning team. If you plan on hitting multiple stores, create a team of family or friends to do the shopping. One strategy that works well is to have a driver that drops off family members at each store and then picks them up. Even better would be to take multiple vehicles or car pool with friends. You don’t want to finally hit an important store at 3 PM. Think outside the box...plan on getting all shopping done in the morning. Remember, create organized lists for each family member and figure the money situation out the night before. 10. Beware of “sale rage”.
Remember: Most Black Friday advertisements come out on Thanksgiving day.
Some people are so pumped about getting a deal that they will do anything in their power to make sure you come second. If there is only one $50 flat screen monitor left and a soccer mom is sprinting towards it with foam at her mouth, you might just want to skip out on it...she is dangerous. There you have it...10 tips to make your Black Friday a huge success. PAGE
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Breaking Every Mom Needs a Break...
Point
Itís probably no secret to you that today’s mom is busier than ever. It doesn’t matter if you’re a career mom trying to balance work and family- or a stay-at-home mom trying to run the household and manage the many activities your children are involved in. This hectic pace often translates to isolation and leaves you little time for anything else. I’ve been working closely with stay-at-home mothers since 2002 and it’s no secret that most moms will do everything they can to provide the best for their families, often at the sacrifice of their own happiness. We lose contact with friends, don’t take care of ourselves like we used to and seemingly lose our true sense of self. Still, it’s not easy when we have heavy demands on our time and sometimes the only spare moments we have are when everyone is finally in bed and the house is silent. When the house if finally silent, take the time to read a good book, call an old friend or put in that exercise DVD you’ve been promising yourself you’d try. And never be afraid to ask for a break. Ask a trusted friend or family member to watch the kids for a while and go do something fun for a few hours. The kids will be just fine and you’ll be a much happier mama when you return. Plus, that’s good for the whole family! Recently, I spoke to Life Coach Aurelia Williams of RealLifeCoaching.net and she told me, “Being a busy mom, it can become so easy to fall into the mommy guilt trap where you start to neglect yourself. Many moms feel guilty if they take time for themselves and end up taking care of everyone else around them and pushing their own needs aside.” This ultimately will leave you feeling burnt out, stressed out, truly unhappy and sometimes resentful. During the journey of motherhood, it is easy to lose ourselves along the way and inadvertently cut off or not seek out the support and camaraderie of other mothers.
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Aurelia also urges you to give yourself ìtime to unwind, socialize and bond with others, especially other moms. This allows you to truly rediscover yourself- you know the woman you were before all those wonderful kids came into your life? Moreover, when you socialize with other moms, you can gain support, ideas and tips to help you with deal with certain parenting and relationship concerns from others who feel just like you do or have dealt with the same issues. Even when youíre busy, you can always connect with other moms during your childrenís activities. Start chatting with other moms at your child’s soccer practice or after her piano recital. Social opportunities are available to you many times in the day- you may just not notice it. So take some time for MOMMY and enjoy it!
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AMAZON KINDLE TABLET So, yeah, it’s kind of a BIG DEAL.
How to enter? Subscribe to www.UrbanParentingMagazine.com,
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Healthy. Happy. Hair.
Natural Hair DO’s and DONT’s for the Holidays.
By Debbie Manigat There has been a revolution in the black community. No more perms, no more lye, no more known or unknown chemicals that can be harmful to our scalp, hair follicles, or our bodies. No more having our children endure being burnt due to excessive heat or harsh chemicals. No more experimenting with color that strips moisture or products that leaves us bald. We’re going natural baby and we love every minute! I’ve been natural for six years now and it has been a liberating process loving every curl and coil. I don’t have to stress about getting an appt every two weeks at an expensive salon, don’t have to worry about products having a negative effect on my hair, and I don’t have to make the same cycle of damaging hair choices for my daughter. Now I will admit, the process wasn’t easy. I had to approach my hair in a whole new way. I had to do lots of research and patiently wait for any significant signs of growth and length, yet in the end I learned so much about myself, my hair, and new ways to show positive natural images of beauty to my daughter. Now as the holiday season is upon us, I’ve thought of here are Urban Parenting’s top 3 healthy hair tips to survive family dinners, work parties, and charity gala’s that will leave you and your hair very happy! 1.) Read UP- the Science of Black Hair is an empowering book full of resourceful information on surviving your natural hair journey this holiday season and for life! Learn more here: www.blackhairscience.com 2.) Moisture, Moisture, Moisture-Try pure Shea butter, Jamacian black coastal oil, or olive oil this season to shield your hair from harsh or cold weather conditions, lubricate your ends from breaking, and keep your scalp dandruff free. 3.) Protective Styling- Try wigs or hair wraps this season to keep stress off your tresses and give you fun options to throw on and take off when you’re ready! PAGE
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Thanksgiving Family Activities 30
If you’re hosting a family thanksgiving, you want to create a fun family environment that helps children understand the importance of thankfulness and reminds the adults of this as well. Since Thanksgiving comes just before what many refer to as the ”greedy” season, activities designed to remind people of the bounty in their lives are useful. For example, you might help children understand that while they don’t have everything they want, they do have everything they need. How do you do this? Several ways. One is to help children create a cornucopia, which will sit on the Thanksgiving table. There are a variety of ways to do this. You can make a leaf-base cornucopia using a balloon as the base to help you get the shape started. You can simply take large piece of poster board and shape them into a cone and fill those with whatever you like. As an extra activity, you can have the children decorate the cornucopia before it gets filled. Since the idea of the cornucopia is to celebrate a bounty and appreciate that bounty, you can fill it as is traditionally done with squash, corn and the like. You might also ask each member of the family to bring something that represents their personal bounty in life. A new mom might bring a baby blanket to put in the cornucopia while a newly retired grandpa might add a picture of his family, since that’s what’s most important to him. You can discuss the items in the cornucopia basket at the dinner table while enjoying your Thanksgiving feast. Another family activity that kids like is the thankfulness jar. When each person arrives at dinner, they place a note with something they are thankful for in the jar. Ideally, each person will add more than
one item to the jar. At dinner, someone (ideally, the matriarch of patriarch of the family) reads the notes. Everyone tries to figure out who wrote which note. The items can range from the serious (someone who struggled with an illness in the previous year might be thankful for life, quite simply) to the silly (the new mom might be thankful there’s a Starbucks within 5 minutes of her home). Kids enjoy adding their own touches to the thankfulness jar and their responses are often a surprise to the adult family members.
winners they can’t take the centerpieces until dinner is over! You can have a similar game before dessert. Create a family trivia game and quiz family members before dessert. Only the people who get the answers right get to have their dessert. Everyone else has to keep trying until they get their trivia question right. Questions can range from the silly to the sublime. They might look something like this: *Who got popcorn stuck in her braces at 12?
Some families have several tables set about at Thanksgiving. Many people buy professional floral arrangements to decorate the tables. You can make a game out of it to figure out who’s going to get to bring home the table arrangement to their home. You can do the old wedding thing and simply put a number on the bottom of the centerpiece and have someone’s chair match that number or you can make a game and perhaps create a trivia game out of Thanksgiving facts. For example, questions might look like this:
*Which man here wore boots with big holes in them until he was 20 and could buy his own?”
*How many turkeys are cooked on Thanksgiving throughout the US?
*Whose grandparents immigrated to the US from Haiti?”
*Why are turkeys called turkeys?
*Which boy here got suspended from school for riding his bike into the classroom?”
*Which president set aside the last Thursday in November as Thanksgiving?
...help children understand that while they don’t have everything they want, they do have everything they need...
”Which young woman turned her hair pink and then it all fell out?”
Be sure you research and know the answers and then quiz everyone. This is a great way to pass the time while everyone is waiting for the feast to be ready. Just tell the
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