URBANParenting MARCH 2014
M A G A Z I N E
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nal Nutr io
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on Mont i ti
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10 Ways to sneak fruits and vegetables in your family's diet
Single Moms THE 8 REASONS WHY YOU HAVEN'T FOUND MR. RIGHT!
DELICIOUS DIY SNACKS FOR KIDS
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SUPERFOODS for Age-Defying Beauty Is your Child Good for
Nothing?
contents 18 24
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10 ways to sneak some extra fruits and vegetables in your family’s diet
Single Mom The 8 reasons why you haven’t found your Mr. Right
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Is your child “Good For Nothing”
7 Reasons Why you should be using coconut oil
MORE IN THIS ISSUE... 05 Why we need to take risk 06 Delicious DIY snacks for kids
08 The not so perfect parents 10 5 tips to keep your marriage exciting 16 6 Superfoods for age-defying beauty www.urbanparentingmagazine.com U R B A N P A R E N T I N G
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Editor’s Note Come on- you can do it! It's time for you to face yourself in the mirror and make a daily plan for stepping out in health. What's your reason to get fit? Maybe you need to shed the baby weight from pregnancy or there's a college reunion coming up and you have to be the sexiest person in the room. Or maybe you want to fight heart disease, diabetes, arthritis, Parkinson's disease, and even cancer... yep, research states that adding exercise into a well balanced diet can prevent the above. Exercise also has been proven to reduce stress, ward off anxiety and feelings of depression, boost self-esteem, and improve sleep. Plus, what about your spouse and kids? They are always watching and will follow your lead. Be a fit role model and show them an active example of health, yet another win- win... I don't know about you, but those sound like pretty good reasons to me! So are you ready to handle our Fit Family Challenge? Get up and start today, even if it's just a quick 10 minute walk- that's better than nothing... Here's what Urban Parenting want to see you tackle for your health: 1) Wake up 30 min.'s earlier- pray, meditate, reflect and try a power cardio work out!
Urban Parenting Magazine Published 11 times a year by Urban Parenting Magazine LLC., in West Palm Beach, FL. Editorial submissions and reader correspondence are welcome. We reserve the right to edit, reject or comment on any material submitted. We are not responsible for the return of unsolicited material. Urban Parenting Magazine is available online and at numerous locations within diverse communities free of charge. Publication and distribution of the magazine does not constitute an endorsement of information, products or services. The publisher reserves the right to reject any advertisement or listing which is not in keeping with the magazine's standards. Copyright 2014. All rights reserved. Any reproduction in whole or in part is prohibited without written permission.
PUBLISHER Wilson Manigat EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Debbie Manigat
2) Ride a bike to do your errands instead of using your car.
Founded by Wilson and Debbie Manigat in 2013
3) Walk your dog 1 block further than usual each week or volunteer to walk a friends dog (they'll love you for it- so it's a win-win!)
How to Contact Us
4) Have fun- take dance lessons!
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5) After dinner, make it a habit to take a walk around your community and invite your family to join you! 6) Take the stairs instead of the elevator at work or for play! 7) Park your car in an area that forces you to walk a significant distance everywhere you gochallenge yourself and try it- this works!
info@urbanparentingmagazine.com Office: (954) 560-8326 Correspondence: Urban Parenting Magazine P.O. Box 222911 West Palm Beach FL 33422
Document your fit family journey and video tape yourself working out with your kids. Upload it to YouTube with Urban Parenting's Fitness Challenge in the title and you could win an UP Family Fitness Pack! (*Remember to consult your doctor when building a healthier you and seeking to incorporate the best exercise plan for you into your daily routine. Details of Fit Family Challenge on our website: www.UrbanParenting.com)
Debbie C. Manigat Editor-in-Chief
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I
t does not matter if you are a Doctor, a Lawyer or an infantry soldier in the Army if you want to be the best and get ahead, you will need to take risks.
A doctor may have to take risks when working with a patient. The Doctor may have to experiment with different forms of medications or new surgical procedures when all else has failed in an attempt to help the patient. A lawyer may have to argue a case in an unorthodox manner to win the case, but if the lawyer wants to become the top lawyer and make millions of dollars fighting high profile cases lots of risks have to be taken.
A soldier may have to take a risk and run thru gunfire to save another injured soldier, to complete their mission, or just to secure an area from being overrun by enemy troops, after going days with little to no sleep, but if a soldier wants to get promotions and eventually lead men into battle they also need to take risks. These risks are not unlike someone looking to get rich in a casino, they have to be willing to risk everything they have to get that million dollar payoff. If you play it safe in a casino you may get lucky and win a big jackpot on the slot machines, but if you want to make millions you are going to have to play games such as Poker, Blackjack, Roulette and Craps. These are the games that with some skill, some luck and a lot of risk
Why we Need to Take
Take
Risks
taking you can retire off your winnings. The same can be said about life in general. No one gets ahead in life from playing it safe. You will not meet your special someone if you are too afraid to risk getting rejected by someone, you will never get that big promotion unless you take risks at your job. It is very important to continue to take risks in life. To stop taking risks means to stand still in life. Standing still in life is one of the main causes of depression. These are usually the people afraid to confront the boss and tell him that they demand a raise; they are the ones that allow life to pass them by out of fear. The entire purpose of fear is to stop you from taking a risk.
Fear is nothing more then the unknown. If you have always wanted to quit your job and open a shop but you are too afraid to do it, this is because you are afraid of failing and risking what you already have. It is important to learn to take risks in life if you want to be happy, you may not always get the things you risked for, but you will know that you tried, and in the end it does not matter in my opinion if you succeed or not it is how many risks you try to make that is the real test of how successful you are. Just remember if no one took risks we would be a world without flight and probably no automotive vehicles at all, maybe we would have no electricity. So risk truly is needed to improve the world.
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Delicious Snacks For Kids Nearly seven million American children come home from school to an empty house, clamoring for a quick, appetizing snack only to settle for junk food. But instead of reaching for the sweets during those cool after-school days or hot summer nights, kids can put on the chef's hat and prepare their own easy, tasty snacks that are just as satisfying.
K
ids often shy away from preparing anything other than a peanut butter and jelly sandwich because it's too difficult and time-consuming. But there is a wide variety of products available at the grocery store, like Tyson refrigerated, fully-cooked chicken and steak strips, which simplify the snack- and meal-making process for kids. The strips go from package to plate in minutes-making it easy to prepare kid-favorite snacks and meals such as pizza, tacos and pasta. These wellbalanced, do-it-yourself options are high in protein and have zero grams trans fat, so parents can feel good about providing kids with a wholesome alternative to help power them through their active days. With snack and meal ideas like these, children can come home and reach for something other than the usual suspects-instead preparing a delicious snack on their own. Who knows? Maybe they'll even graduate to making family dinners.
Fiesta Chicken Nachos
11/4 cups Tyson Southwest Seasoned Chicken Breast Strips 1 bag (10 oz.) tortilla chips 2 cups shredded Mexican blend cheese 1. 2.
Layer chips, cheese and chicken strips on a large, microwavesafe plate. Microwave on High for 30 to 45 seconds or until cheese melts.
Serving Suggestion: Serve with pico de gallo, guacamole and sour cream. Refrigerate leftovers.
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Chicken Tacos Ole
1 package (6 oz.) Tyson Refrigerated Fajita Chicken Breast Strips 4 taco shells 1/2 cup shredded cheese Shredded lettuce 1. 2.
Heat chicken strips and taco shells according to package directions. Fill shells with meat, cheese and lettuce.
Serving Suggestion: Other toppings can include diced tomato, salsa and sour cream. Refrigerate leftovers.
NOT SO PERFECT
The
Parent
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ll of us have that guilty feeling from time to time and yet it is the most wasted emotion of all. We can't take back words or actions, no matter how hard we wish.
If you are a parent, this guilt seems to be present even more. This useless feeling is a universal phenomenon. Why does this "guilt trip" seem to be an expanding epidemic? I believe the answer to that is (1) More women work away from home (2)Singleparenting is on the rise and (3) There are so many books written on how to be a "good" parent. The first two things I have mentioned will sometimes keep you away from the time you would be spending with your child. I firmly believe in quality, not quantity. Now don't get me wrong. There are many excellent books that have been written regarding child-rearing. I'm sure they are helpful. The point I am driving at is this; there seems to be a lot of pressure to be a "good parent." We certainly should all keep trying but also, keep in mind that you have your own inner voice that tells you what is best for you and your child. What works for Johnny may not necessarily work for Mary. If in doubt, follow your heart! Guess What? When you are not perfect, you are letting your children know that you are human. You are also teaching them to forgive, as you forgive them. Worried about being perfect? Think about the person who reared you? Were they perfect? Do you love them today? Children can tell if they are truly loved. It is
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Your child already knows that you are not perfect. He or she also knows how much you love them. You can't fool a child. They are spirits like you and I. not measured by how many hours are spent with them or if you were tired that day and lost your cool. It is certainly not measured by how much money you can spend on them. Your child already knows that you are not perfect. He or she also knows how much you love them. You can't fool a child. They are spirits like you and I. They are the most honest people on this earth. (Remember how they informed Aunt Edna that she had a hair growing from her chin?)Believe me, they are honest and will forgive your mistakes. Please forgive yourself. No one has ever been a perfect parent...not ever. If
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you love yourself, you forgive yourself. As Oscar Wilde, an Irish playwright and poet wrote: (1843-1900) "To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance" If you love yourself and forgive yourself, that is another lesson your child will pick up from you. It's a win, win situation! So, relax. Bask in the fullness of your reciprocal love with your child. Some day he/she may be telling a story...."remember when Mom did.........."
Finding Resources
E
Every parent finds themselves in need of help at one point or another. As a parent, where do you turn for guidance? Use the following suggestions to help you determine your best source of support and inspiration.
1. Get your hands on the best books. Chances are good that regardless of what you are now facing as a patent, someone else has gone through it before and written about it. Take advantage of the lessons they have learned and study the methods of dealing with the trials and tribulations of parenting. Look for bestsellers and follow authors who have a style and philosophy that resembles your own. 2. Ask your family physician or pediatrician for advice. Most doctors have children of their own and have also been questioned about every parenting issue under the sun. Talk to your child's doctor about what is going on and what your fears are, and ask what they or others have done in similar situations. Your doctor's office may also be able to recommend helpful literature. 3. Seek advice from trusted friends or family members. When something is going on in your household, hiding it from others doesn't solve anything, nor does it set a good example of how to respond with your kids. Talking openly can provide your family
with solutions and offer everyone an outside opinion. Lean on family and friends when you need help, and make a joint effort to resolve the problem(s) your whole family is facing. 4. Try online forums for parents like you. There are many forums devoted to single parents, both moms and dads, and all kinds of other unique situations. There should be pages upon pages of discussions you can relate to. Introducing yourself and briefly stating your dilemma should result in an
outpouring of advice, support and otherwise friendly words. You can remain completely anonymous or use your real name and locale, depending on what suits you. 5. Attend local meetings of moms and dads with similar circumstances. Formal or informal group therapy is an amazing outlet for parents with problems. It can
When You Need Parental Support provide you with a nurturing environment that offers you a voice to unload your frustrations and a place to relate to others. Just hearing the stories of others will make you feel at home, and you can give each other advice or simply form lasting and valuable friendships. 6. Learn to trust your instincts. There will be many times when you alone must deal with the family problems, so learning to depend on your own instincts is a highly beneficial parenting skill. Once you've got enough knowledge and support under your belt, dealing with problems that arise with your children should get easier and you should be able to do so with more confidence. 7. Keep an open line of communication with your kids. No matter how many external sources of support you lean on, never stop listening and talking. What your children have to say will always be important, even if you don't agree with them Also, no matter how difficult things become, they will always need your voice of reason and to know that you love them. Hopefully this article has given you plenty of food for thought regarding your parental problems. Don't be afraid to reach out and seek support with others: you've got a really tough job to do!
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tips to keep a marriage exciting
The buildup to the wedding is so exciting; making arrangements, laying out a plan for your future lives together. But after the honeymoon ends, life begins. And while you may have the most wonderful marriage, even the most devoted couple is certain to find the married lifestyle to be at times, well let's say, less than exciting. I mean let's face it, you love the other person, but spending all day with the same individual makes for a lot of routine activities, that if you are not careful can drag on your relationship and make you both feel unsatisfied with what is otherwise a very loving relationship. As a result, it is vital that couples not simply sit back in the belief that a marriage will remain exciting merely on its own momentum. Rather, it is important that spouses take some basic steps to infuse their relationships with a bit of excitement.
1. Have Independent Interests You cannot have anything interesting to say if you spend every waking moment doing and experiencing the same things. Having independent interests is not a sign of a weak marriage, as some newlyweds believe, but rather a sign of its strength. Having independent interests means that you have something unique to bring to conversations, ensuring that you both always have something interesting, and yes exciting, to say to one another.
2. Spontaneous Events While you were dating, planning the spontaneous event seemed rather innate. But, as we grow comfortable in our relationships and more busy by life's obligations, we have a tendency to rely upon the strength of our relationships and in so doing fail to keep things spontaneous. So to mix things up; plan an afternoon or evening event that is completely new. Try that show your spouse has been dying to see, or visit that new restaurant that just opened up.
3. Never threaten separation This is less a rule to keep things exciting, and more one to keep them sound. A relationship can only grow and remain exciting if both parties are confident in their commitment to one another. As a consequence, make it a rule between you and your partner that you never threaten separation or divorce. Establish an understanding that if you threaten separation, you should be heading out the door to back it up. It is a harsh rule, but one that needs imposition if your relationship is to survive the ups and downs which are a part of all marriages.
4. Weekend Trips One sure-fire way to inject some romance into your marriage is to take a vacation with just the two of you. But with the rigors of life and the costs of a trip, a fullblown vacation can seem hard to justify. So instead opt for a one night local vacation. Plan a dinner and evening out, and cap it off with a night in a hotel. The expense isn't a lot considering the excitement that a trip, no matter how small, can bring into a relationship.
5. Spice up the bedroom The final tip to bring excitement into any relationship is to spice things up in the bedroom. Your sex life has a strong correlation with the strength and satisfaction of your relationship. So try exploring a new position or even a sexual fantasy or adult toy with your partner, and in so doing share something intimate and bring some excitement into your marriage.
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Fun Adventures For Children
n important part of parenting is to offer your children as many experiences as possible that will help to develop his creative processes, natural curiosity and joy for life. One way to do this is to frequent places where you and your child, or the whole family, can learn about our world, and enjoy the process. In this article, you will find some great ways to enrich your child's life through special outings.
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Many people have not heard of, or experienced the mystery and adventure of visiting caves. Many areas around the country have cave tours, or safe caves where families can venture into the darker recesses of the world, and learn about the life within. Children love adventures, and caves are a great way to mix that excitement with education. Museums are not just for old people! They are wonderful places to learn about the past, present and even the future. Try taking your child to different types of museums, and help him to read information about the different exhibits and art. There are many museums geared
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specifically for children, like the human body, dinosaurs, cars, toys and hobbies. Afterward, it can be fun to discuss what was learned that day, or what the favorite exhibits were. Visit places that have a historical background. Children can have great fun, as well as a valuable learning experience, from places of historical value. Destinations, such as the Lincoln Memorial, the Grand Canyon and even Yellowstone National Park have a lot of history behind them. You can book a tour with a tour guide who may give a talk about your destination, and recommend sights that are fun to seel If you are planning a vacation, try going somewhere unlike the area you live in. If you live in the country, go to a beach, and learn about boats, fish and other things you don't often see at home. If you live in the Midwest, try venturing to a mountainous area, such as the Olympic Mountains, for hiking and just taking in the beauty and majesty of a snowy mountain. If you are looking for an educational
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experience right at home, you can find scores of movies and documentaries about famous people and places to spark your child's curiosity and appreciation for the experiences of others. Some interesting choices might be: war documentaries, if the children are mature enough, inventors, such as Henry Ford or the making of Mount Rushmore. These movies are interesting, as well as awe-inspiring. Use games to encourage learning, as well as offering an opportunity for a fun family evening. Have a game night, and choose educational games, such as memory games, word games and building games. These types of games are useful to spark a child's memory, word skills and motor skills. A plus is that they are great fun! Hopefully, you can see through this article that children learn from many different experiences. The more you allow your child to experience, the more his life will be enriched, and he will make lifetime memories. Use your imagination, and you will see your child's imagination bloom as you experience life together.
10 Ways To Sneak Some Extra Fruits And Vegetables In Your Family’s Diet
We all know by now that we should be eating at least five servings of fruits and vegetables each day. But knowing and doing are two different things, aren't they? Sometimes it is just not easy to get them all in there. We are constantly tempted to fill up on convenience and junk food. If your family is anything like mine, they’d much rather fill up on a bag of chips or a bowl of rice or pasta instead of trying an apple or a plate of steamed broccoli. So we’ll have to get creative. Here are a few ideas to “sneak” some extra vegetables and fruits in your family’s diet.
Start the day with a breakfast smoothie. All you have to do is throw some fruits, low-fat yogurt and ice in a blender. You may also want to add a scoop of protein powder in there for good measure. Just blend for a few seconds and you have the perfect breakfast ready to go. I like to sip mine in a thermal cup on the way to work. To make it even more appealing for your kids, use some frozen yogurt or a scoop of ice cream in the smoothie. They won’t believe that you are letting them have ice cream for breakfast.
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Dried fruit makes an excellent snack any time of the day. Add some small cartons of raisins to
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your child’s lunch box, pack some yogurtcovered raisins in your husband’s briefcase and keep some trail mix sitting around for snacking. You can also add dried fruit to oatmeal and cereal in the morning. My family loves banana chips in their breakfast cereal. Add some fruits and vegetables to your family’s sandwiches. You can add some banana, sliced apples or strawberry slices to a peanut butter sandwich. Top a turkey sandwich with lettuce, tomato, cucumber and anything else they will eat. You can even make a sub shop style vegetable sandwich by combining several different vegetables with some mayonnaise
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and cheese on bread. Have a salad bar at dinner. Set out a variety of chopped vegetables, some cheese and croutons as well as several choices of salad dressing along with the lettuce and let everybody create their own perfect salad.
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Let them drink their fruits and vegetables. Keep an assortment of fruit and vegetable juices in the fridge and encourage everyone to drink them as a snack. Get creative. You could start “family cocktail hour” by pouring everybody a glass of his or her favorite juice over ice. Add
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some straws, cocktail umbrellas and sit together to talk about how everybody’s day went.
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Try this for dessert. Put a small scoop of ice cream or frozen yogurt in a bowl and top it with lots of fresh or frozen fruit.
Offer fruits and vegetables as snacks. You can cut apples into slices and top them with peanut butter or cheese. Cube cheese and serve with grapes. Cut up some fresh veggies and serve them with ranch dip. And of course there’s ants on a log. Spread some cream cheese or peanut butter on the inside of a stick of celery and
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comfort food when the weather gets cold.
sprinkle raisins on it (wow, fruit and vegetable in one snack). Try some new fruits and vegetables. Pick something exotic to get your family’s curiosity. With a little luck their curiosity will outweigh their initial apprehension to trying something new. You could try artichokes, plantains, papaya, mango, star fruit, or anything else you can find in the produce department of your local store.
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Make a pot of vegetable soup or a stew that’s heavy on veggies and easy on the meat. Both of these make some great
Start “My Veggie Day”. Each family member gets to pick a vegetable one day of the week. They qualify to pick a vegetable as long as they tried each vegetable the week before, otherwise they loose a turn and Mom gets to pick. Incorporate a few of these ideas and you will have everyone in your family eating more fruits and vegetables in no time.
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Here is another tip: Now that everyone in the family has gotten a taste for it, make sure you always have plenty of fresh fruits and veggies available and ready to snack on.
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For Age-defying Beauty! 1) Goji Berries
Goji berries, hollywoods hottest new food, are one of the most nutritionally dense foods on earth and house a staggering concentration of vitamins, minerals, amino acids, phytochemicals and essential fatty acids. With such an awesome constitution it is not surprising they are reputed antiaging marvels. Originating in Tibet and greatly favoured in traditional medicine these dried berries have many noted health benefits including boosting immunity, lowering cholesterol, enhancing vision, fighting cancer cells, relieving depression and aiding weight loss. Goji berries contain 500 times more vitamin C than oranges by weight and more beta-
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carotene than carrots making them a superb source of vitamin A. Together with vitamin E and essential fatty acids, these berries are ideal for any anti-aging and beauty regime. They also contain polysaccharides, one of which has been found to stimulate the secretion of the rejuvenating human growth hormone by the pituitary gland, as well as B vitamins, 21 minerals and 18 amino acids. The most well documented case of longevity is that of Li Qing Yuen, who lived to the age of 252. Born in 1678, he is said to have married 14 times with 11 generations of posterity before his death in 1930. Li Qing Yuen reportedly consumed goji berries daily.
production 100% naturally for a youthful, wrinkle-free complexion and plump, beautiful skin. The ultimate botox alternative! The inner gel of the aloe vera leaf contains around 200 active compounds with over 75 nutrients. These include 20 minerals, 18 amino acids and 12 vitamins (even vitamin B12- one of the very few plant sources of this vitamin). Aloe vera also has antimicrobial properties fighting fungi and bacteria and houses anti-inflammatory plant steroids and enzymes. Aloe vera is known to aid digestion and elimination, boost the immune system, and be highly
A study cited in Dr. Mindell's book "Goji: The Himalayan Health Secret", observed that 67 per cent of elderly people that were given a daily dose of the berries for 3 weeks experienced dramatic immune system enhancement and a significant improvement in spirit and optimism.
2) Aloe Vera Foget botox, Aloe vera increases collagen
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effective at healing, moisturizing and rejuvianting the skin, naturally stimulating
the production of collagen. Aloe vera is best eaten fresh when possible (you can order large aloe vera leaves which last a few weeks refridgerated). Scrape out the inside gel, avoiding the outside of the leaf which is a strong laxative, and blend with fruit for the ultimate beautifying smoothie. Aloe vera has a mild flavour though a slight bitter edge, hence is best combined with fruit.
3) Avocados
The nucleic acids RNA and DNA in Chlorella (one of the highest known sources of such) direct cellular growth and repair and enable our bodies to utilize nutrients more effectively, eliminate toxins and avoid disease. The production of nucleic acids in the body declines progressively as we age, which is no doubt why their intake is recommended by Dr. Benjamin Frank in "The No-Aging Diet". Paul Pitchford in "Healing With Whole Foods" writes that "insufficient nucleic acid causes premature aging as well as weakened immunity", Research at the Medical College of Kanazawa in Japan found that mice that were fed chlorella had a 30 per cent increase in life span. Replenishing RNA and DNA can be key to overall health, immunity and longevity. In addition to nucleic acids, chlorella is jampacked with vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, enzymes and amino acids, making it an incredibly rejuvinating and health-promoting superfood. Spirulina is a virtuous equivalent.
Avocados are smoothing and softening for the skin and easily absorbed; compared with almond, corn, olive, and soybean oils, avocado oil has the highest skin penetration rate. Avocado also contains vitamin E (excellent for the skin), antioxidant carotenoids and the master antioxidant glutathione that is exceptionally powerful and has anticarcinogenic potential. High levels of glutathione are found in the liver where the elimination of toxic materials takes place. Glutathione is effective against pollutants such as cigarette smoke and exhaust fumes as well as ultra-violet radiation. Research is currently exploring the potential benefits of glutathione for numerous conditions including cancer, heart disease, memory loss, arthritis, Parkinson's disease, eczema, liver disorders, heavy metal poisoning and AIDS.
4) Chlorella
5) Bee pollen
strength and stamina, aiding longevity and enhancing libido! It has been called a 'prefect food' because it is so nutritionally complete.
6) Coconut oil
Coconut oil speeds up your metabolism and can actually help you loose weight. It is also incredibly beautifying and moisturizing for the skin and has antioxidant properties which protect against free-radical damage, keeping the skin youthful and healthy. Taken internally or externally coconut oil is a great ally for any beauty skin care regime. It also contains lauric acid, an anti-microbial fatty acid that kills bacteria, viruses and fungi.
When it comes to young and beautiful skin, bee pollen has outstanding gifts. Swedish dermatologist Dr. Lars-Erik Essen uses bee pollen to successfully treat acne and other skin conditions and observes it's beautifying and anti-aging effects. He reports that bee pollen "seems to prevent premature aging of the cells and stimulates growth of new skin tissue. It offers effective protection against dehydration and injects new life into dry cells. It smoothes away wrinkles and stimulates a life-giving blood supply to all skin cells." He believes it's skin rejuvintoin properties are due to its high concentration of nucleic acids RNA and DNA, as well as its natural antibiotic action. Bee pollen has a host of other healthpromoting benefits that include fighting infections, lowering cholesterol, strengthening the blood, Boosting the immune system, increasing physical www.urbanparentingmagazine.com U R B A N P A R E N T I N G
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SINGLE MOM Mr. Right! THE 8 REASONS WHY YOU HAVEN’T FOUND YOUR
t
he statistics, in this case, don’t lie. By the age of 50, 27.6% of women are still single. That’s more than 1 in 4.
Some of them of course, are not interested in finding a man as a life long partner and if they’re genuinely happy, that’s fine. Although it does need to be a genuine wish to stay single, not a once held desire to be partnered now lost. You’ll learn more about that below. But you’re reading this, so I suspect you are interested in finding your Mr. Right. So you’ll need to know which of the following 8 reasons is stopping you finding him. Of course it could be more than just 1 of these reasons. Whichever apply to you (or even if your reason isn’t identified here), they all have the same effect. If you continue to hold these reasons dear to your heart, you will not find your Mr. Right. Harsh I know. But you’ll understand why by the end of this article. However, if you are prepared to tackle the issue, then you really can find your Mr. Right.
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So what are the top 8 reasons why you haven’t yet find your Mr. Right?
1. You’ve been burnt in the past by relationships and it’s just too painful to go out and look for another. Some women keep this reason so well hidden within themselves that they don’t even realize that’s their reason. Maybe it’s years since you split up with this partner, but you felt so hurt, so damaged by the break up that you just can’t bear to put yourself through it again. As a result you aren’t out actively looking for, or getting, dates on a regular basis.
2. Your self-esteem is low. “Who would love me? I’m not attractive. No one would want to go out with me.” That’s the kind of things you say to yourself if you don’t have the self-esteem you need to go out and get the relationship you genuinely deserve. There are a whole host of reasons why you
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may not have the esteem ñ but the important thing is that the belief that you’re not worthy of a loving, caring partner is a serious block- which you can address.
3. There aren’t any decent men out there. This belief is commonly rooted in the first reason I talked about above; being burnt in the past. But there are other reasons. It could be that your standards are unattainably high sometimes you set them that high to protect yourself from being hurt again or from being rejected. Yes, it is possible that you genuinely can’t find suitable men, but there are millions out there, it’s rarely solely to do with looking in the wrong places.
4. I just don’t have time. If you rise before the sun and you’re too exhausted when you return from work, it’s understandable that you don’t have time to go out and socialize. But just how important is it for you to find a life long partner? If it really isn’t that important, don’t worry about it, just keep going at your career.
By the age of 50, 27.6% of women are still single. That’s more than 1 in 4.
with the clear picture in your mind of your future Mr. Right.
7. You don’t believe you need to actively search for him. It will happen naturally. Won’t it? Well how’s that strategy worked for you so far? If you’ve been waiting to find him “naturally” for the last 10 years, how many more decades do you want to try this as a method? Searching for him doesn’t mean you’re desperate or that you’re breaking some hidden female rule. It simply means you get a lot more guys to pick from and you’re much more likely to find someone who’ll be perfect for you. There’s a lot of historical social proof to suggest that your knight should just come riding in on his white horse. But I’ve got news for you ñ the horse went out as a means of transport in the 19th century!
8. You don’t believe you can significantly affect the likelihood of finding your Mr. Right. However, if you still have that niggling feeling that you really do want to find him, you must change your routine to free up time to go out looking for and going on dates. If you haven’t managed to put those changes in place within a month, there’s a bigger, hidden, secondary reason why you’re not making the time for it.
5. You’re concerned there’s something wrong with you. Surely it’s one of our biggest fears that we’re not loveable. If you put yourself out there and nobody wants to be with you, isn’t that what’s being said? So by not putting yourself out there to be rejected, you don’t run the risk of learning that message. In other words, by not taking action to find Mr. Right you can never be said to be un-loveable because you haven’t really tried.
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The reality of course is that you are loveable. By the way, you may have spotted that this reason is very closely tied to selfesteem again.
6. You don’t like the dating scene. Maybe you don’t like pubs and clubs & smoky atmospheres and drunken sleazes trying to chat you up. And what if you don’t like internet dating either? Lots of time wasters, losers and geeks. I always tell my clients that dating is a numbers game. If you’re chopping out all the high number options then you’re definitely making it a whole lot more difficult for yourself. There are alternatives, just as long as you’re prepared to invest more time in plowing through the numbers. And yes, you will always come across men you see as losers, geeks or sleazy wherever you go. That’s why it always helps to have a clear picture of who you’re planning on meeting ñ because when you’ve had another fruitless night of dating, you can always comfort yourself
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“I just haven’t found him yet & it’s just a case of waiting for the right man to come along.” There’s a statistic published by one of the dating agencies at the moment that it takes 432 introductions to find your partner. Well you’ve already met more than 432 people in your life. There’s something you’re doing or something you believe that is affecting your ability to attract your Mr. Right. If you don’t change it, you won’t find him. Not because he isn’t out there, but because your actions keep him away from you. You may not know what it is that you’re doing, but be reassured that you can change it if you a) work out what it is, and b) decide that you are committed to changing it. So those are the 8 top reasons. There are more. But they all have one thing in common. They are beliefs that affect your ability to attract the right man. If you really want to find your Mr. Right all you need to do is work out which ones are preventing you finding him and take action to change them. What’s preventing you?
Is Your Child
“Good for Nothing”? don’t believe in good for nothing.
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I was walking down the aisle of a large supermarket when I heard a mother hissing to her crying child, “Good for nothing! Nothing! You better stop this now or I will leave you with the police man”. Not that I am angel when it comes to being a parent to my kids. Sometimes, I falter too and I will yell and shout and throw a massive, scary temper and my kids would cower in fright thinking that their mom was going crazy. Hey, I am human, ain’t I? But I would never call my kids stupid or good for nothing. For one thing, I sincerely believe that education is important ñ but it’s not everything. We, as parents, have to carry this grave responsibility of providing our children with education. Not only do we have to fund it, we have to ensure that they learn whatever they can learn from the education system so that they can benefit from it later on in life. Knowledge is a funnel. A funnel whereby information can flow into and train a mind to think and react in a certain knowledgeable way. It’s important. But frankly, I don’t think it’s everything.
Listening to their cues What’s more important to us, parents, is the listening skill, not directing or bossing skill. We need to learn how to take cues from our kids, open up gates and doors and let them explore and watch them. Watch how they are taking in the vast opportunities that are being presented to them. Do they like it? Are they interested? Is this their calling? Is
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this their gift? This is what goes through my mind whenever I introduce something new to my kids. We, parents, should not try to force something (ANYTHING) on to our kids. As much as I hate being forced to do something (I quit the banking world for a reason, didn’t I?), I won’t force my kids to do something that they don’t like. Of course, there are things that they HAVE to do (like homework, cleaning up, showering, good manners, etc), I also have to bear the responsibility of ensuring that they are well disciplined and yet free to explore the world. But in other respects non-related to their safety and general well-being, force is not my style.
Even the worst kid in school can do well I believe we all know of geniuses who have made it far beyond our human comprehension. People who we, today, claim as geniuses were called “buffoons” in their early days. Let’s take Albert Einstein as an example. His teacher thought he was a complete loser and yet today, the world think and knows FOR A FACT that he is and was a genius. Even in death, he made a difference not only in his own life- but to the rest of the world too. While we should not expect
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our child to be Einstein or paint like Da Vinci, we should always be on a lookout for their gift.
The gift-everyone has one Everyone has a gift, God is fair. One person may fare well in math while the other did terribly. But if you look close enough, you’ll see that the second child who can’t count for nuts can paint like no one else! No one is bor
n without a gift, which is what I believe. Some people have multiple gifts and are multi-talented in nature but no one in this world is without one. Parents should set out to find out the gift of their child. It could be anything! ANYTHING! Like Don who loves cleaning out closets and is meticulous in arranging stuff ñ he’s a good accountant today. Like Gina who loves to play in the playground instead of doing her homework, she’s one of the most popular kids’ football team coaches in her country today. And Simon who was so weak in math that his mother almost told him to leave the house and never come back, he’s a professor in Philosophy today.
Think about it No one is good for nothing. Even trees or
worms are good for something. Trees give us oxygen and some serve as food. Worms digs holes in the ground and helps trees grow. Even bacteria are good at something. Bacteria can actually benefit our health. What about mud? Think mud pack? Everything is good for something. Why not your child? Your job, as a parent, is to find that “good”, find that talent. And perhaps, maybe it’s got nothing to do with education.
Reasons
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Why You Should Be Using Coconut Oil t is a common misconception that coconut oil is bad for you. People all over the world are experiencing the healthy benefits of using coconut oil. It is actually one of the healthiest oils you can consume. Here are the top seven reasons why you should use coconut oil as an alternative to other common cooking oils.
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1. Coconut oil doesn't turn to fat in your body. Unlike many other common oils, like soy (vegetable) and corn, coconut oil won't make you fat. Coconut oil contains medium-chain triglycerides (MCT), which are an easy fuel for the body to burn, without turning to fat. Most other cooking oils and fats contain longchain triglycerides (LCT). LCT's are usually stored as fat. Since coconut oil is a MCT, it is more easily absorbed and converted to energy quicker.
People in the tropics have relied on coconuts as a traditional staple in their diet for centuries. They consume large amounts of coconut oil every day. Instead of getting fatter, it helps them stay healthy, lean and trim. When they switch from coconut oil to our modern oils, they develop obesity and the health problems that our modern society faces. Some other people who have known this truth for a long time are people who are in the animal feed business. When livestock are fed vegetable oils, they put on weight and produce more fatty meat. When they are fed coconut oil, they become very lean.
2. Coconut oil increases your metabolism. Not only does coconut oil convert to energy quicker in your body, it increases your metabolism, which promotes weight loss. Because it boosts your metabolism, it helps your body burn fat more effectively. Coconut oil may triple your calorie burn. Since coconut oil is a MCT, it is converted to energy so quickly that it creates a lot of heat. In a study published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, MCT's burn three times more calories for six hours after a meal than LCT's. The February 15, 2005 issue of Woman's World magazine stated that coconut oil is the "underground high-metabolism secret." This is great news for people who have thyroid problems, since coconut oil improves sluggish thyroids by stimulating the production of extra thyroid hormones. Most other common oils, like vegetable (soy) and corn have been shown to inhibit thyroid function.
3. Coconut oil has omega 3 fatty acids. Most cooking oils contain omega 6 fatty acids, something we get way too much of in the United States. Our omega 6 to omega 3 ratio should be 1:1 but it is more like 50:1. We need to drastically cut back our omega 6 oils and consume much more omega 3 oils to be healthy. And coconut oil is filled with these healthy omega 3 fatty acids.
4. Coconut oil gives you energy. Because of the healthy omega 3 fatty acids
and the fact that it increases the metabolism, most people that switch to coconut oil feel a burst of added energy in their daily life. This is because coconut oil is natureĂs richest source of medium-chain triglycerides (MCT's), which increase metabolic rates and lead to weight loss. MCT's promote thermogenesis, which increases the body's metabolism, producing energy.
damage. Coconut oil makes excellent massage oil too.
6. Coconut oil has healthy benefits that most other oils do not. Evidence is mounting that coconut oil has anti-fungal, anti-bacterial and anti-viral effects when both consumed and used topically on the skin.
This is because coconut oil is natureĂs richest source of medium-chain triglycerides (MCT's), which increase metabolic rates and lead to weight loss. MCT's promote thermogenesis, which increases the body's metabolism, producing energy. Many people with chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia have found that adding coconut and
Coconut oil improves sluggish thyroids by stimulating the production of extra thyroid hormones. coconut oil to their diet was helpful to them.
5. One of the best things you can use on your skin and hair is coconut oil. Coconut oil one of the best things you can apply directly on your skin and hair. It gives temporary relief to skin problems like rashes. It aids in healing and restoring skin to a younger appearance. It has also been known to help with people who suffer from yeast infections in the skin, as well as many other skin problems. Not only does is soften and smooth your skin, coconut oil has antioxidant properties that protect the skin from free radical
Most oils oxidize and turn rancid very quickly causing free radical damage in our bodies. Coconut oil is not easily oxidized and does not cause harmful free radical damage like polyunsaturated vegetable oils. Free radical damage is thought to be responsible for many ailments in our body from arthritis to increased susceptibility to cancers. Coconut oil also helps our bodies absorb other nutrients more effectively, such as Vitamin E.
7. Coconut oil is one of the best oils you can use for cooking. It has a higher smoke point than olive oil, which means it can take higher temperatures better. There are several healthy omega 3 oils we can choose to consume, such as flax and olive oil, but they don't do well under the high heat we use for cooking. Coconut oil can be used in higher cooking temperatures. It is harder for coconut oil to go rancid, unlike other cooking oils, which are usually rancid long before you even bring them home. Rancid oils cause free radical damage in the body, which is a leading cause of cancer. Coconut oil is stable for over a year at room temperature. Because of the misinformation we have been given for years, we have lost out on the healthy benefits that coconut oil has given the people of the tropics for centuries. But now it has been rediscovered! Coconut oil is so effective, it won't be long before we see coconut oil supplements promoted, but you can get the jump on the popular crowd and start consuming and cooking with coconut oil today!
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