Isyourlovermakingyoubreathless? Orleavingyou gaspingforair?
ROUGH SEX
Ifyourloverisinitiatingchoking oranyotherroughsex,have youconsented?Doyouhavea wayofsignalingit’stoomuch?
Safewords,tappingormoving theirhand(s)awayshould signalaclearstop
Sexplayshouldalwaysbe continuouslyconsensual.
Areyoucedingcontrolorpower withfullconsentandtrustinthe otherperson?Ordoyoufeelyou needtopleaseyourpartner,ahead ofyourownfeelings?
Ifthereisanydoubtaboutyour willingnesstoparticipate, reconsiderthispowerdynamic Yourlifecouldliterallybeinthis person’shands.
NO SAFE WAY TO PLAY
Therearezero“safeways“todochokingsexplay. None Apartnercannotbetrainedto“spot”when someoneislosingconsciousness,cuttingoffa dangerousamountofoxygen,orexperiencingother life-threateningharm
Chokingmaynotleavethekindof physicalmarksthatotherrough playdoes,butthatdoesn’tmean there’slessdamage Airway damageandbraininjuryfrom oxygenlosscantakedaysto appear.
Ifyouhaveanymemory,vision, personalitychanges,swallowing ormotordifficulties,orother physical,cognitive,orsudden behavioralchanges,seek immediatemedicalcare.
Strangulation asanactofviolence
Puttinghandsonapartner’sneck isoftenapreludetofatalviolence
Yourabuserissignalingthatthey havecontrol,includingtheability andwillingnesstoendyourlife
Youcantakebackthatcontrol.
Yourabusermaybeapologetic, andevenpromisetoneverhurt youagain Ifithappensonce, itwillhappenagain Thereare alwaysoptionstoenhanceyour safety
Nomatterwhatyourabusersays, youdidnothingto“start”or deservethis
Endinganabusiverelationshiptakessafety planning.Anabusermaybecomemoreenraged whenfacedwithlosingcontroloveryou Leavingcan bedangerous Workwithanadvocatewhocanhelp youprotectyourprivacyandsafetyduringseparation
Someabusersdeliberatelychoose strangulationbecause“theyfeel they’renotgoingtogetcaught” Youhaveoptionstodocument what‘shappeningtoyou Your confidentialadvocatecanhelp Monitoryourhealthforany changesthatcauseconcern
Ifyouhaveanymemory,vision, personalitychanges,swallowing ormotordifficulties,orother physical,cognitive,orsudden behavioralchanges,seek immediatemedicalcare.
Needsomeonetotalkwith?Aconfidential advocatecanhelpyou,includingplanninga safewaytoendadangerousrelationship.. Available24/7bycalling213-740-9355(WELL)
