Intercollegiate/Interscholastic

More than sport

Polo helps student overcome grief and fears

By Stesha Payne

Stesha and daughter Kayci at regionals. Stesha says the polo community has welcomed them both with open arms.

Just over two short years ago, I found myself at the Michigan State University Polo Club’s tryouts at the recommendation of a friend. Riding was nothing new to me—although I was most comfortable riding western—but the word polo was a foreign taste in my mouth. I can remember being overwhelmed by the experience as I anxiously awaited my turn while I second-guessed my involvement in such a unique equine sport.

My college career was already off to a late start. Although most people were oblivious to my differences, I was self-conscious about my decision to pursue a bachelor’s degree in Animal Science after a few years’ hiatus from formal education. Less than a year after graduating high school, I gave birth to my daughter. Just over a year after that, my fiancé committed suicide in our home. I continued to work for a while following that tragedy, until one day I was stuck in traffic on my morning commute. I knew that wasn’t where I needed, or wanted, to be, and when I finally arrived at work that day I put in my resignment notice. Once I got home, I applied to Michigan State University.

My close friend Elly [Schwingel], who was on the varsity team of the Michigan State University polo club, convinced me to try out, and I was entirely skeptical considering I knew nothing about the sport. Realistically, I came from a 4-H foundation and polo seemed like such an unattainable sport; both physically and financially. To my surprise, the club was designed to allow members of all riding skill levels and financial abilities the opportunity to learn about polo and the horses involved. Despite having no prior polo experience, I made the varsity team and suddenly became submerged in the sport and some of the life it can offer.

Personally, polo has been a bit of a lifesaver for me. It came right at a pivotal time in my life when I needed something to look forward to each day. Starting your college career can be daunting and mentally tiring, and the barn became a place of release and peace for me. Each practice presented something new I could work towards, and eventually I found myself working towards a healthier me outside of the barn too. The mental burdens that come with grief and a traumatic loss tried to keep me in bed many days, but the horses needed to be worked and I found my way to practice each time.

My time spent in the barn led to stronger relationships with my teammates and coaches. When Elly found out that she was selected to compete in England for the USPA intercollegiate U.S.A. team, I knew I had to find a way to go and support her in the same way she had always supported me. So I faced my fears of flying and got on a plane for the very first time for eight long hours to England. The connections I made with the team, and becoming the unofficial cheerleader, are ones that will last me longer than the flight over there felt. Having the opportunity to absorb how their horsemanship and

Stesha says she now drives anywhere to find polo to watch, groom or play chukkers.

Stesha’s daughter, Kayci is often cheerleading from the side of the arena.

Time spent in the barn led to stronger relationships with teammates and coaches.

styles of play may differ and exchanging greetings with fellow polo players across the pond was an experience that will remain unmatched.

Since breaking the ice in my travels for polo, I have found myself driving anywhere to find polo to watch, groom for and even to pick up some chukkers. Each and every person I’ve met along the way has offered me a unique learning experience, and their kindness towards my willingness to learn is what helps fuel my fire to become a better polo player, horsewoman and advocate for all that intercollegiate polo can offer.

Even though I am an intercollegiate player, I have a daughter and she is normally in tow with me to anything polo related. Through polo, my daughter and I have become a part of a bigger family than just the two of us and that is something I will be forever grateful for. Every club I have visited, especially the MSU Polo Club, has welcomed us both with open arms. Her early introduction to polo and its warm atmosphere continues to improve her confidence level, social skills and her interest in horses. Even though she is too young to know an important part of her life is missing, polo helps to fill a void for both of us.

Without polo, I would have never been brave enough to go on my first flight or confidently swing my leg over a horse I just met. The horse management skills I continue to learn are unmatched by those learned in a classroom, and even holding an executive board position for the club is preparing me for a future in leadership. To some, it’s just polo, but to me, it’s the exhilarating sport, the amazing people, the athletic horses and the incredible opportunities along the way. •

With a horse-riding background, Stesha made the varsity team.