We Don’t Owe You Desirability Aimee Chia
CONTENT WARNING: FATPHOBIA, EATING DISORDERS Ask yourself: why is it that the word ‘fat’ has such negative connotations? Why is being ‘skinny’ a compliment but being ‘fat’ is an insult? Why is being thin so desirable to so many women? From a young age, women are taught that to be desirable is to be valuable. We are taught that the more we are wanted, the more we are worth, a huge issue which continues to be prevalent in society today. It tries to give us a price tag, and judges us based on whether or not we meet its superficial criteria. But this mould we are expected to fit in has undergone many, many drastic changes over the past few decades- trends like ‘thick’ butts were not a thing in the 2000s. Beauty standards are constantly shifting and warping from one unrealistic expectation to the next, and they often end up contradicting each other overtime. Fatphobia is merely something constructed out of thin air to make women feel like they need to fit some mould in order to feel validated. There is nothing inherently wrong with being fat, and the only reason why it has such negative connotations is because it’s been ingrained in our brains that it’s undesirable. As Naomi Wolf said, “a culture fixated on female thinness is not an obsession about female beauty, but an obsession about female obedience. Dieting is the most potent political sedative in women’s history; a quietly mad population is a tractable one.” Capitalism wants us to consume and inject money into the economy; so, it makes women feel like they aren’t enough in their own skin, it makes us feel like we need products to feel good about ourselves. The patriarchy wants control and it will try its best to subordinate women by holding us to these ridiculous standards of beauty. For years and years, women have been held to these unrealistic expectations, each one fuelling a sexist spiral. But the truth is that women don’t, shouldn’t, and never did owe anyone desirability.
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