2017
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contributors
EDITOR Rigel Paciente
CONTRIBUTORS Rigel Paciente Reece Gherardi Anonymous Gabe Spiro Martha J McKinley Vorie Robyn Alphonse Jobling Laura Clappinson Ian Brady Annette Barlow Conrad Hogg Emma Krantz
DESIGN AND LAYOUT Lyn Sillitto
ARTWORK PAGE 4 Alphonse Jobling
2 OUTSPOKEN
Editorial
5
Rigel Paciente
STORY Not Really That Lonely
6
Anonymous Untitled
7
Emma Krantz Outspoken
14
Anonymous The War in the Mind
17
Ian Brady
Reece Gherardi
20
INTERVIEW Coming to the Realisation
8
Gabe Spiro
POETRY Hand to the Moon
12
Rigel Paciente Ode to a Homophobic Parent Anonymous Falling Conrad Hogg White Picket Fences Conrad Hogg
contents
Stop the Erasure of Gay Culture
16
17
19
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4 OUTSPOKEN
next twenty or so pages, we are going to take you into a wild, political, dramatic, opinionated, and loud journey to which no other human has seen before. The infamous Harry Potter fanfiction, “My Immortal”, is absolutely babashooketh with the quality of writing you are about to see. In all honesty this magazine, being the first ever that the Pride Department has done, was the most difficult thing to create. From trying to set deadlines to which no one adheres to, to laying this out and designing everything from scratch, my creative inner crazy needed to come out. But seeing as I am a pure, innocent, wholesome millennial who has an unhealthy obsession with ruining my chances of ever buying a property by excessively buying avocados and brunches, there was barely anything that I could contribute. But at the end of the day, it was done. It was printed. It was designed. It’s in the students hands. It’s in your hands. I would like to thank everyone who contributed, even if it was handed so late that it drove me into insanity and set me into a constant state of panic. That is ok. (This would be a great place to insert the “this is fine meme”, but I don’t know how to incorporate that into this report). Special thanks to Lyn Sillitto for designing and laying out the magazine, and most especially having to deal with late submissions. But despite the ultra-late submissions, the people who have contributed are people whom I love very dearly. Regulars in the department regardless of how long they’ve been there, or regardless of political differences become quite close to you, so much so that the department becomes a tight family. I mean, considering that we were all socially awkward rejects who stayed because it was a place for us to feel safe, in addition to the fact that making new friends was difficult, we had no choice but to
editorial
Take your seats and strap on your seatbelts buddies because for the
become a family. Well in my case, I just wanted to learn… and decided to stay because our biweekly discussions of the history of memes was too great for me to let go. For the people who have never come into the department before, I strongly encourage you to go. Not only so you could experience my dictatorship but so that you can learn more about the LGBTQIA+ community. I, coming from a Catholic high school with only a couple of other gay and lesbian friends, was so disconnected from the community to the point where coming into the department was a massive culture shock. I had to learn new terms and come to the realisation that my very existence was political, and so on. There were so many things that I had learned only because I decided to stay. So please, I do encourage you to visit, talk to people, and take part in our events. So what’s next? Well that’s up to you. You may choose to throw this magazine in the bin, keep it, leave it at the bottom of your bag to rot. In all honesty, I don’t really care. So long as you’ve seen it. I hope you’ve had a great Pride week, and a great year in general. Always and forever, xoxo Riggy <3
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BY ANONYMOUS
reasons) and honestly the angrier responses didn’t
I’m actively trying not to write an essay here, but I
Which fed one of my major fears in life - that I’m going
will try and address my main point right off the bat,
to be lonely. (Not in a ‘never going to be married’
which is - in the words of Kesha - “I am proud of who
way, but a ‘I’m pushing everyone away because I’m a
I am”. Now, this is for 2 reasons. Firstly, Kesha is
useless person’ way).
really affect me as much as the outpouring of pity.
awesome and ‘Praying’ is freaking transcendent and I’m not over it yet. Secondly, currently being a proud
Moving on into me within the lgbt community. Which
asexual hasn’t always been easy for me.
became an Experience™. Mainly because I was mainly an online queer - which means that you are putting
Personally, there was no eureka moment for me. From
yourself out to get both lots of incredible love and
a young age, I had never had a crush on anybody and
support but also plenty of backlash from gatekeepers
couldn’t see myself in a relationship with anyone
and trolls.
when I grew up. (I’m pretty socially awkward, so that might be a part of it as well). I procrastinated
Onto my original point - being proud- and long story
doing anything about it until I eventually got around
short, I’ve always tried to avoid “The Discourse” both
to the label of asexual. I was really relieved because
online and in real life. But especially over the past
I felt a lot more justified in how I had always thought
few months, the discourse has come to me. I’ve
and that gave me a lot of self-confidence. Most
been told that my myself and that ace positivity is
importantly however, it meant I wasn’t alone and that
the equivalent of reverse racism and that because
I was part of a community.
I haven’t been historically discriminated against, I don’t count as lgbt+.
Before I jump into the “community” aspect, I need to mention how lucky I was to have friends both old and
Obviously neither of these things are true, and I’ve
new who were full of support and love when I came
had enough of feeling like an outsider because of
out - first as ace, then a little later as non-binary.
ignorant jerks. Unfortunately on the road to that
Even if they didn’t completely understand everything
conclusion, I experienced a lot of hurt and I wouldn’t
going on.
be as strong as I am today without the unconditional kindness shown to me by my friends I made at uwa,
Unfortunately not everyone who knew was as
who for one of the first times in my life, just let me
supportive. Actually something I didn’t expect at all is
belong and be myself. And that means the world to
that I’ve actually experienced more hostility because
me.
I’m asexual than because I’m non-binary. Which seemed weird to me because I used to consider
So, just to recap. The fact that I’m ace and non-binary
asexuality as ‘not doing anything’ which I didn’t think
doesn’t completely define me as a person, but it is
was that controversial. It has been made crystal clear
enough to make me a part of this community and it
to me that I am “not normal” by some super helpful
(along with the rest of me) is a lot to be proud of. I’m
people who aren’t my friends anymore.
comforted that because of the love I’ve been shown I’m no longer scared to imagine my future. And no, I’m
However, a lot of the time I knew I didn’t fit in and I
not lonely anymore.
NOT REALLY THAT LONELY have faced plenty of aggression in my life (for various
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I was sitting on a swing in a park in Tasmania. “You’re 14 years old, you’re bisexual, and you’re in love with your best friend.”
BY EMMA KRANTZ The words echoed over and over inside my head, part mantra, part curse. By that point, I’d kissed a few girls, slept with two, dumped my first boyfriend, and fallen in hopeless, messy love with a girl whose touch stopped my little teenage heart. But it was only at that moment that I finally brought myself to even think the dreaded B-word might apply to me. Fast forward to my second year of uni. It was 2am, and I was drunkenly crying my eyes out on the floor of my friend’s room. I’d just had my heart broken by yet another girl. “I like men, I just don’t want to sleep with them.” My friend laughed. “Maybe you’re a lesbian?” she asked gently. “No, I think I’m just grey asexual.” A pause. “I don’t think so,” my friend said. “But only you can know, I guess.” She wasn’t the first person to suggest that I was gay, or the last. But I was scared. The world was already big and indifferent and difficult enough without the added complications of homosexuality. I was attracted to women, sure, but I had always planned to end up marrying a man. I wanted kids, and a family, and a white picket fence. Life would be easier if I was in a straight relationship. And yet... Skip ahead again six months to New Year’s Eve. I was in the passenger seat of my best friend’s car, watching the coastal scrub of Dunsborough roll by. I took a deep breath. “I think I’m a lesbian.” “I think you might be, yeah.” The hurt inside my chest, pain I hadn’t even known I was carrying, fades. It took seven years, three boyfriends, three almost-boyfriends, two almost girlfriends and one too many shitty hook-ups, but I found the right word eventually.
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BY GABE SPIRO Coming out is difficult, I remember before I came out to my mom I felt nervous about doing it. But I also remember wondering why I was so nervous because in all honesty I had no reason to be; my sister was dating a girl and was out to my entire
8 OUTSPOKEN
COMING TO THE
REALISATION
family and she received nothing but support from everyone. So knowing this, what reason did I have to be nervous? I was indeed fortunate to have such a progressive family. But I wanted to know what it must be like for someone who was in a situation where coming out might not be as easy for them so I sat down for an interview with Peter Gasper, a psychologist who has personal experience with this situation: he was married and had two children when When did you get married? I got married in December 2000 How long were you married? I was married- I’m still married actually but I’m legally separated, so I’m not actually divorced. We separated in August 2008. Did you have any feeling that might have been gay before you got married? Not really, not anything I was consciously aware of, but I think that it was just so far from my consciousness, if that makes sense. Like it was never something that I really considered, ever. Like I never considered it to be a possibility or an option in my life. So not only did I not have feelings that I was gay, but I never considered that it would be a possibility in my life, if that makes any sense. So I almost get the sense that even if I had feelings, I wouldn’t have even been aware of them or open to them. So even if you had feelings you would have been oblivious to them? I think I always had this notion that the narrative of my life would be that I went to school, I went to university, I graduated, I started working, I got married, I bought a house and started a family. That’s what I thought my life would be and…. That’s what my life turned out to be [chuckling].
anything that deviated that much from that plan
or that story. And certainly being gay wasn’t part of that.
With regards to coming out, what were your
ARRI
But in that what didn’t factor into that was
fears? What were your thoughts in general?
I had two main reservations, concerns, fears: hurting my wife, and what the implications would
When did you come to think that you might
be for my kids. Those were the two biggest things.
have been gay?
I never really thought much about how it would
That’s a really big question. For me, it was around about the time my first child was born. And I’m
not sure what happened then. That was around December 2004. So around about then, I think things started to change for me. And it was at
that point when it just started to snowball. Then it just became more and more apparent and that’s when I got to the point of August 2008 when I came out.
How did you finally come around to accepting that you were gay?
God that’s a hard question. ‘How did I come round
to accepting it?’ That’s a really good question and it’s a valid question. You know, the thing that really astounds me is that I don’t know if I can even remember. I’m trying to think. You know, I
don’t know if I actually actively fought against it. There wasn’t a massive, massive struggle for me for too long. If you think about it around 2004 to
2008, it’s a four year process which seems like a
long time but probably not in the grand scheme of things, considering how old I am and so forth.
No, I think what happened is that it came quite apparent- my attractions were such that I was
feeling attracted to men and that was something I hadn’t experienced before and it was getting more and more and stronger and stronger, until it became irrefutable. And so it felt like it was
affect her and how it would affect my kids, which is something that I still consider and think about. I
think particularly for my kids, whilst it’s becoming more common it’s certainly not the norm to be the
child of a gay parent and I think, you know, that’s not easy for them. Not that there’s anything
wrong with it but that it’s a point of difference for
them. Hopefully it’s something they feel proud of and that’s what I certainly try to foster. But those were my two biggest fears.
How did your friends and family, specifically your wife and children react?
My kids were way too young to really understand
and fully comprehend. My wife was devastated.
Devastated, devastated, devastated. There’s no other way of putting it. And I think as a result, a
combination of angry and hurt, very, very angry. I think what was underneath that anger was the hurt and her own fears for what it meant for her life. I think to be a woman in her early thirties,
mother of two small children and a husband who’s left her, who’s come out as gay. What does
that mean for her? You know, so I think she was really afraid and she was afraid and really hurt
and on top of that really angry- which lasted
for a while but that anger dissipated and a lot of her fears and her hurt healed and we have an amazing relationship now. Fantastic relationship.
AY
a process. I don’t think there was a watershed
affect me. I thought very much how it would
moment where it was “Ah, that’s it, I accept it”. I think it gradually built over time.
I always knew we’d get to that place because
she’s an incredibly strong woman. I knew we’d get there.
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well a n incred i b upport i he’s su p oud She dealt with it well?
Really, really well and incredibly supportive.
She’s super proud of our- she calls it our “modern
family”: You know her and her partner, me and my partner, and the two kids. We are this one big
modern family who really love each other and I feel like my kids are quite fortunate in many ways
because they have four parents who absolutely adore them. I feel sorry for them sometimes
because they have four parents who all have something to say [chuckles] but they have four parents who’d lay down their lives for them.
a difficult experience. Challenging and hard, but
nowhere near as difficult as what I hear others
go through. I think the defining difference was the people around me, I’ve had incredible support from the people around me. Do you have any regrets?
In my moments of frustration I think “Why couldn’t I have figured this stuff out sooner?” But then I also tend to counter that with “It is what it is”
and “It is how it is”. There’s not a lot to be gained from going back and saying “If only I had….”. Every
time my mind goes there I tend to just say “Thank
You mentioned before your concern about the
you, mind, time to move on to something more
effect this will have on your kids but did any
productive”. I choose to live in the now, I don’t
fears you didn’t mention come true?
want to live in what could have been.
You know what, Gabe? My experience with coming
Do you have any advice for other LGBTQI+ people
out was probably, I think-I hope it’s a story of
who might be afraid to come out?
encouragement to others because I consider myself to be one of the luckiest and most fortunate people in the world because I don’t think there’s been a single bit of backlash for me, in any way,
shape or form. My family, in particular, and all of my friends have been incredibly supportive. And there’s….. nothing. It’s just been phenomenal. And it continues to be.
So you would say your life has changed for the better as a result?
Certainly. Absolutely. Although, there’s still a level of sadness sometimes that I’m not still married to
the mother of my children. I think there’s a level
of investment we have in a nuclear family, I think
there’s something to that because it’s become part of our consciousness, a part of our psyche
or something and we long for it. I come from a
family where my parents have been married for
fifty-one years, I have a sister who’s been married for almost twenty-five years, my brother’s not though. And a very close family. I guess that was always my story. I thought that was what it
would be for me as well. But otherwise no, it was
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Lots of advice. There’s one thing I love to do and that’s give a lot of unsolicited advice to people.
It’s hard to distill it, but maybe in no order of importance, this is what I would say:
1) I would encourage everybody who is
struggling with the process of coming
out to first and foremost be honest with themselves.
2) Know that being LGBT is part of you but
it’s not the sole part, it doesn’t have to
completely define and dictate your life, but it’s a part of their identity
3) There’s nothing wrong with it, be proud of
it. Don’t let anybody tell you that there’s
something wrong with you and keep that sacred.
4) Surround yourself with people who care.
nd bly ive. per
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HAND 12 OUTSPOKEN
BY RIGEL PACIENTE I wonder what you’re thinking of right now. Do you see what I see? As I look up to the sky, Do you see what I see?
The moonlit night creating vivid images, Inescapable. The moon’s light hitting my bare eyes, Captivated
The constellations swerving and dancing,
How I wish I could partake.
The gentle caress of your hands on my waist, I miss
Now, may I partake?
The moon, constant in size
Do you see what I see?
Our visions intertwined regardless of distance.
I’m sure you see what I see.
As I raise my hand to block out the light, Negation As I raise my hand to the moon, I remember Attraction.
TO THE
MOON OOUUTTSSPPOOKKEENN 1 3
14 OUTSPOKEN
ATOMIC TANGERINE
TRANS WOMEN
such thing as “masculine” or “feminine”.
22, LESBIAN
23, OLD GUARD
My parents would often use her or she
My story is boring. I’ve gotten bored
I realised I was interested in people of
for men, and he or him for women,
of it, so I’m hesitant to inflict a highly
the same sex when I was 11. It was a
etc. The words “they” and “them” were
condensed version on people who
very clear attraction, kind of obvious. It
used. So growing up, gender was never
don’t particularly care about a cast of
was like a button had been pressed and
truly enforced onto me apart from
characters who were in my life 2-10
suddenly I was getting strange, very
external societal pressures from the
years ago.
unwanted feelings. The world around
media. LGBTQIA+ culture was also highly
me felt incredibly homophobic and I was
prevalent in the Philippines despite the
totally isolated from anyone else who
country being predominantly Catholic.
might understand.
So I knew that everyone is accepting. In
Imagine my story as that of the 40 year old woman who gets divorced because she accepts she’s a lesbian. Only I was
fact, being gay was glorified.
19, and my long term boyfriend and I
I tried everything to change I guess
were too not-hardcore-Christian to get
and I considered every option. Dying,
Me coming to the realisation that I was
married.
running away, just faking being straight
gay was not a problem. With progressive
forever, actually trying to change my
parents, I knew it was nothing to worry
sexuality. Over time I learnt more about
about. In fact, I felt invincible. I flaunted
what being gay means through media
it at school, and people respected me.
and online and I stopped hating myself.
In fact, I was never bullied. My sexuality
Lesbianism was a strangely easy thing to ignore for a long time. I had my first feelings for a girl when I was 14, an age where it was so unimaginable that I was gay I didn’t even consider it. That
While realising I was gay was a very
year I wrote in my diary “it feels like I’m
cut and dry sort of affair (once the
questioning if I like [friend], not if I like
quite long denial stage was done with)
girls” and that was the end of it until I
realising I was transgender took more
came out as bi at 17.
thought and consideration. I suppose
By that time I’d been in a heterosexual relationship for over 2 years, which is a long time when you’re barely out of high school. I thought my relationship was
that when you grow up with dysphoria you start to tune it out at some point
a thing I care to do for many people.
from adults and people my own age
I went through cycles were I would worry intensely that I was a lesbian and then decide I wasn’t. Eventually I broke
never wanted to be with a man again, but I still held out for that feeling which would arrive unattached to my thoughts and feelings about real living people. Finally I accepted there was no such thing, there was merely what I wanted, and I only wanted women.
the Pride Department. I learned so much about this culture that I have never been exposed to before. I learned the language, the politics, everything.
had to knock them down and even then
in conjunction to my naturally curious
the decision to transition was kind of a
personality, has allowed to me become
leap. The real confirmation that I was
more knowledgeable. It has shaped me
transgender came over time, each day
in a way which put me in a position
where I feel free.
of power regarding myself. I now see
19, YOUNG LIB LOOK-ALIKE
and would reveal itself to me. I knew I
knew anything about LGBTQIA+ culture.
Coming to the realisation that I was gay,
uncertain.
that transcended my cognitive being
people have come out, no one really
degenerate? I put up strong walls and I
GAY LORD
for an inner truth, some sort of essence
Bullying
taught me that I was, I don’t know, a
up with the boyfriend, but I was still
I would spend those cycles searching
stage. Even in year 12, when 6 other
culture shock for me when I discovered
for gender nonconformity.
present in my life. For almost a year
since I was the only person out at that
completely natural and normal.
Explaining precisely how it wasn’t, isn’t
my life. It kept my love for women
disconnected from LGBTQIA+ culture
Coming into university was such a
My entire life I’d been harshly policed
made there, slowly but surely changed
school. The only problem was that I was
and think a certain amount of misery is
concrete evidence I wasn’t a lesbian.
The pride department, and the friends I
was even celebrated in my Catholic high
“I consider myself a very lucky person. Growing up and fully realising who I am was an extremely easy road compared to other people. In my household, we were encouraged to be who we are, express ourselves the way we wanted to, and just live life like the way we planned to. You know, so long as we did our best and got good grades, my parents were extremely chill. In Filipino
the problems in society regarding our community. It has truly given me insight on how to be truly progressive in this world of craziness, chaos, and hypocrisy. There is still room to grow and explore myself. But I have to remember that being gay is just a part of me. From, Quite literally, the Gay Lord™ or “The one who keeps getting mistaken as a young lib due to my fashion choices.”
culture and language, there was no
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I am sad
(A reaction to homophobia from a significant otherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s parent)
I am hurt I am unsurprised Most of all I am tired - not just physically tired, but mentally and emotionally exhausted I am tired of expecting to be disliked I am tired of having to be happy if the only acceptance I get is being allowed into the house on sufferance. I am tired of having to hide I am tired of being a problem I am tired of being a dirty secret All she asks is to be treated the same as your other children All I ask is to be treated the same as one of your other childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s girlfriends. I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even need to be liked I just want to be equal I just want to be accepted I just want to be human.
Ode to a homophobic parent 16 OUTSPOKEN
WAR IN MIND
THE MY
BY IAN BRADY
The most defining moment in my life was when the acting stopped, the curtains
closed and it was just me, the mirror and the truth. I looked fixedly at the mirror and saw a miserable reflection staring back with tears streaming down.
I became unrecognisable and what happened next was a result of a whirlwind of emotions that spanned over 5 years. Every night I dreamt for those words to finally come out of my mouth. It was in an endless war in my mind. I just longed for the feeling of liberation. I wanted the freedom, the freedom to be myself. I was always described as an unusual child. A colourful soul that was too feminine for the world. The world that drained every colour out until there was a confused teen living in a black and white world. It became apparent that I had to act like anything but myself and that became my life for most of life. A barrier was built up and a superficial character was conjured to get me through these tough years. As each year passed more emotions were supressed and I slowly entered depressive state. With all the acting I even tried to convince myself that I was this new persona that I created. However, the curtains were closing only my acting and I could feel a new door was trying to open. Through all the tears, anger, anxiety and fear I looked back in the mirror and confronted myself. I came to terms with who I am and finally said the words “I am Gay”. I’ve always wanted this moment. A coming out moment. I always knew I was gay but I was so afraid to admit it. Its hard to explain to people how much freedom to be yourself means to those that are supported by society for who they are. Coming out has brought my confidence back and I’m slowly starting to break down the wall I built over the years. Most important it has allowed me to appreciate everyone’s different journey in coming out and support those who haven’t yet. Ultimately, I might not have the support of the world but I have my freedom and a community filled with love.
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CONRAD HOGG
FALLING
One day the sun caught his nut-brown hair that crept across his forehead and spiralled around his crown He wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t classically handsome but sembled soft as it shone
He sat on lush green and laughed, and played
with his hands
that I wanted to hold
His deep dark eyes fixed on mine staring right back into them â&#x20AC;&#x201C; the abyss, that I could almost fall into but wanted to fall through into him
keeping our knot tied fear gated my desire like a horse in a stable longing for open fields and to be ridden
hoping to fall, but scared of falling
18 OUTSPOKEN
wrap their photos
in blue indigo orange violet yellow and red – and it’s nice
I feel warm, like a house with round glowing hearth – firm and founded
But I dread the day, when “friends” lock with binarily opposed genders
and buy the block of green, green grass in the suburbs and put up white pickets to lock my colours out
CONRAD HOGG
white Picket Fences
Today my friends
OUTSPOKEN 19
STOP THE
ERASURE
OF GAY CULTURE
20 OUTSPOKEN
BY REECE GHERARDI As part of the gay community, we are locked in a constant struggle for our representation against a heteronormative society that would prefer we disappear. Our representation is important; we are much more than the tragic endings, coming out stories and token gay characters we are too often written as. There were many, many proud gay men throughout history who were out and fighting for their rights in a time where it was much more dangerous to be gay. Our history is a rich one, and it is important for us to remember it and celebrate it. We lose our history not only when we ignore historical figures who considered themselves gay men, but also when we anachronistically apply modern concepts of gender and sexuality to historical figures with no regard for the relevant historical context. Perhaps two of the most well known historical figures are Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera, famous for their roles in the 1969 Stonewall riots. Often, they are referred to as an example of transgender activists throughout history. However, definitions of what it means to be transgender have changed over time. During 1969, transgender simply meant anyone who did not conform to gender roles, while transsexual referred to someone who had undergone, or wanted to undergo, medical transition. When the focus of transgender activism changed to gender identity, rather than sex or medical transition, the definition of transgender was expanded to cover both the previous definitions of transgender and transsexual, giving us the concept we have today. To apply the modern concept of being transgender to Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera is inaccurate, offensive at best, and erasure at worst. This is especially true when taking into account the fact that both Johnson and Rivera identified themselves as gay men. When interviewed for a documentary a week before his death, Johnson explicitly stated that he self-identified as a “gay man” and a “drag queen”. Rivera, a prolific writer, variously called himself a “gay man” and “drag queen”. Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera were not transgender in the sense that we know it today. We are not able to separate them from their identities as gay men, given that, at the time, the two were not mutually exclusive and were often coexisting identities in one individual. Stonewall is just one example of the trend in the erasure of gender non-conforming gay men, both historically and contemporarily. The representation of gay men in modern society is changing, and not necessarily for the better. In marriage equality advertisements, in the celebrities we look
OOUUTTSSPPOOKKEENN 2 1
up to, in the vast majority of the modern representation of
part of the reason that there as less gender non-conforming
gay men, they all look a certain way, act a certain way, and
gay men comes down to the fact that less are identifying as
conform to traditional societal gender roles.
such, and are being pushed to identify as something else.
There has been a long-standing belief in heterosexual
However, being gender non-conforming is not a gender
society that all gay men are effeminate, and femininity tends
identity in and of itself. Gender non-conformity is about
to be associated with gay men as well as women. While
gender expression, while the concept of non-binary is about
it is important that we challenge the stereotypes about
gender identity. To push gay men out of their identities as
our community, it is equally important that we do not deny
gay men, just because they don’t fit gender norms, is simply
and silence the part of our community that is gender non-
another example of how heteronormative gender roles have
conforming.
become pervasive in the LGBT community.
Unfortunately, the voices of gender non-conforming gay
It is important that we differentiate between identity and
men are regularly hidden in mainstream LGBT discourse.
expression in discussion about gender, so as not to erase
I believe that there are a number of reasons for this, and
the identities of gender non-conforming gay men in these
one of the major ones is the current mentality of the wider
discussions.
LGBT community. The community has adopted an almost assimilationist attitude, where our ideas used to be those of revolution and being ‘loud and proud’. It is seen as important for mainstream society to be able to ‘tolerate’ our presence, and thus part of the disappearance of gender nonconforming gay men is due to the widespread adoption of heteronormative gender roles in an attempt to make us more palatable to the heterosexual majority. Despite how much we as gay men try to conform, our very existence as men who love men is a revolutionary act. Homosexuality will always be revolutionary and political, because we exist in a society that prefer we didn’t. Genderconforming and gender non-conforming gay men alike must stand together and fight for our representation and our rights. There is another factor in the disappearance of gender nonconformity in gay men. In recent years, the gender concept of non-binary has emerged and has become a major part of LGBT discourse. While this concept does not have a set definition as of yet, it has come to encompass everyone who does not identify with the gender identities of man and woman. However, more recently, the definition has expanded and, in the eyes of many, it now includes gender non-conforming men and women as well. This has led to pressure being put on gender non-conforming gay men to identify as non-binary, rather than as men. Hence,
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The erasure of gender non-conforming gay men is harmful to the gay community, and the wider LGBT community as a whole. By homogenising the community and quashing all individuality, we are destroying and fracturing the community that our LGBT ancestors fought so hard to create. Pride is about being yourself and being accepted for who you are; whether you like it or not, gender non-conforming gay men are part of this pride, and erasing us defeats the purpose of acceptance it was created for. Gay men face significant societal homophobia. It can come from people yelling slurs at us from their passing cars as we wait for the bus. It can come from our families, who disown us when we come out. It can come from our potential employers who do not want to hire a gay man. It can even come from our friends, the people we thought we knew, who abandon us after we tell them. Gender non-conforming gay men face the additional barrier of fighting against our own community to have our voices heard. Even in the one place we thought we could be accepted, we are too often rejected. This is an internal community issue we must address. The existence of gender non-conforming gay men should not be shamed, denied and rejected by the LGBT community. I am a gender non-conforming gay man, and I am not your dirty secret to keep. Don’t force us back into the closet
Free support for Mums, Dads and children, offering a safe space to all. Lifeline WA’s Separated Parents program is a unique service that provides support to mums or dads and their children for separation or bereavement issues. Our counselling team provides face to face and telephone counselling and group workshops for parents who want to: • Receive support for bereavement or loss • Negotiate shared care arrangements for their children. • Communicate effectively with the other parent.
• Be prepared for mediation and to better understand the mediation process. • Understand the complexities of the Family Court and the legal system. • Access practical and emotional support and assistance. • Create a parenting plan designed specifically to meet the needs of their children. • Lifeline WA welcomes parents and children from all cultures. We include Mums, Dads and children from the LGBTIQA community, offering a safe space to all.
For more information or to book an appointment Ph (08) 9261 4451 Email separatedparents@lifelinewa.org.au For crisis support 13 11 14 Lifeline WA Suite 44a, 7 Aberdeen Street, Northbridge WA 6003 www.lifelinewa.org.au
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Uh-oh, lost my wallet! How am I going to afford my textbooks?
What if Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m sick during my exams?
Can I lodge a complaint about the uni?
AT STUDENT ASSIST, WE ARE HERE TO HELP YOU WITH ANY ACADEMIC, WELFARE OR FINANCIAL ISSUES Student Assist officers are Ally trained and can provide support and advocacy specifically catered to LGBTIQ students. At Guild Student Assist we aim to remain updated and informed around the life experiences, matters and needs of LGBTIQ students, with a particular focus on campus and study experiences. We are also a one stop shop for referral, if you need more information about other services. Guild Student Assist are completely confidential and impartial; we are independent from the University. We are here to make sure you get the most out of your time at uni, so if you ever need a helping hand or a friendly face to chat to, just contact us. Please contact us on (08) 6844 2292 or assist@uwa.edu.
Experience Student Culture 24 OUTSPOKEN