TO SPEND Eternity WITH YOU

CREATIVE DIRECTION- Colin Nguyen, Cecilia Nguyen PHOTOGRAPHY- Cecilia Nguyen

WRITING- Cecilia Nguyen STYLIST- Colin Nguyen MODELS- Sophie Nguyen, Niki Jiang

Onto entangled bodies hen I was a kid my dad loved to tell me the story of how he and my mum came to America. He always repeated it to me in step with any time I wanted to give up on something. If I came home crying about some test, or class or anything I thought was just too impossible, my dad would sit me down and recount the India story. He would tell me how hard things had been for him growing up, how he had worked hard to get himself through school, married my mom and came to America with nothing, and they built our lives. The story is always built to the same moral. “You just work hard Monisha and everything will work out.”

My family could be the poster children for the American dream, and they believe in it like they are. The funny thing about these magical sayings and concepts though is as I got older they started to crack. I was back home this past holiday, and we were again discussing the barriers of life, and my dad cited his Cinderella story and I responded. “I know you guys did work very hard, and I’m so proud of you but you have to admit that you also got very lucky.”

Crickets.

It could be said that all of life is built on two constantly opposing forces: our choices and our fate. Despite my dad’s constant urging my whole life that all one needs is to work hard and believe in themselves there is an element of luck that is important to determining the way our lives play out. While it is continually argued on paper that people, no matter who they are, can achieve the same great things because we are all equal this argument doesn’t work in reality because while all people are created equal we are not created equal in circumstance. It’s like when you read the syllabus for some high-level class that states ten hours of commitment required for every student outside classes or they should drop out. But what about people who have to work to support their families, or those with mental health issues, or those who commute because they can’t afford to live in the dorms? How can a blanket statement like that be applicable to everyone, and how can a measure of hours determine how committed a student is?

It is undeniable that factors like income level, race, gender, family history, sexuality, and mental and physical health can drastically change a person’s situation and limit their choices. Even something as simple as a person’s zip code could be the difference between life and death. According to an article by the NCRC, 60% of a person’s individual and community health is determined by their zip code. This is explainable by not just things like food deserts but also things like understaffing at the few resources the community has, a big example being clinics and hospitals.

“Even when hospitals are present in these areas, they are small and often don’t have the resources to contribute to community improvement, including health outcomes.” explained the NCRC.

Beyond just the roadblock of education and opportunities, there is also the burden of our birth, genetics. You can be one of the kindest bravest souls but if the BRCA gene runs in your family your likelihood of getting cancer increases. The same goes for things like familial history of addiction and mental illness. While there are ways to cope with and manage these illnesses it’s definitely an uphill battle. Even something as simple as a small heavy-set person wanting to play professional basketball comes down to a matter of being born unlucky. They can love the game and be very good but I doubt their body will ever be able to compete with the tall, predisposed-for-the-sport athletes at a professional level. They can both work hard but the same work won’t make the same difference.

As much as it would be nice if everyone were born equal in circumstances in life everyone is dealt a different hand and the game is undeniably rigged for the people with just a little more money, education and access. While the difficulties of fate are numerous and can seem caging, I take comfort in the fact that everyone still has one thing; free will. Overcoming one’s circumstance is not impossible, and while hard work and determination is a part of it an even bigger part is believing that your choices matter. Researchers Woolley and Kelley explained, in a Washington Post article on the nature of luck, how multiple studies have shown how people who believe they are lucky often bring more good luck on themselves unconsciously, as they constantly find the bright side of any surprising instance. This could be explained by the fact that those who believe they have luck on their side are less anxious and more clearheaded when approaching challenges.

“They’re starting to realize that, if a kid forgets her lucky charm and loses a race, it’s not because this supernatural force was missing in her life that day — it was because she forgot her lucky object and that made her stressed and anxious, and that’s why she lost the race.” Woolley said about one of these such studies

The article discusses how the belief in lucky charms and rituals goes on into adulthood, and that optimism and taking the long view of life allows people not to get too bogged down by everything that they can’t control. When I told my parents how I thought some of their success was owed to luck I knew the angry silence after was coming. I had to go further with my explanation.

“What I’m saying is that even though you guys definitely had to work very hard you still had some things that other people couldn’t get. You were lucky enough to be able to go to university, and get a job that could get you to America,” I said.

“We worked very hard to make those things work out,” my dad said.

“Yes of course but you had access. But you must have known other good hardworking people that just didn’t have education or help and got stuck. Their life isn’t necessarily just due to laziness, they just have different circumstances.” I said

“Well yes, of course. You’re saying it’s not just luck or hard work. You can’t make do with just on or the other you have to have some of both,” he replied It took them a moment to come around and after we talked I understood why. They didn’t want to give up any of their success to the insinuation that luck did the work for them, but they once they got that I wasn’t trying to take that success away and that i wasn’t talking about just them we were on the same page.

“Of course we worked hard but you are right we had help. Look at the world right now, there are so many people in situations where there is almost no path to success. There are girls in Afghanistan right now the same age as you who have been banned from university, who have almost no path out now because of where they were born. They can work equally as hard as you but the results won’t be the same,” my dad said. From there the conversation continued. While my dad was very unlucky when he was young, with his family experiencing significant poverty and loss early on, he had the luck of a loving extended family and friends who helped him when they could. Eventually we got to the topic of the american dream, a concept very near and dear to my family’s heart because they managed to live it.

“You know Baba, for every person like you and mum who got to America and made a good life there are ten people who didn’t make it here. I don’t think it was just work, I think the scales are just against them,”

“Of course. It’s just hard to think about it like that. Luck can feel so permanent or so fleeting.”

& the lucky number seven

FIND: a shamrock pot perfect for tea, a sleepy lamb, six dots on a cube a cozy teddy bear, a lucky ladybug sticker, the forbidden hotel floor number, a black feline phone, a salt shaker an ominous crow