Issuu news 239

THE UK’S MOST AWARDED STUDENT NEWSPAPER

YORK VISION Tuesday January 14, 2014

Issue 239

vision@yusu.org

WHOSE PARTY PLANNERS SPENT 1.8K ON WINE?

NEWS PG 3

WWW.YORKVISION.CO.UK

MY WEEK ON THE BRIAN BUTTERFIELD DIET

lifestyle pg 23

GUIDE TO YORK’S STUDENT AREAS FEATURES PG 15

Spotlight: Chase and Status Scene pg 16

OVER ONE IN FIVE STUDENTS QUESTIONED AT THE UNIVERSITY OF YORK HAVE TAKEN “SMART DRUGS”

EAT SLEEP WORK REPEAT

BY JO BARROW STRESSED STUDENTS at York are relying on study drugs to propel them through the exam season, a study by York Vision has revealed.

Over one in five students asked at the university have taken prescription drugs such as Ritalin, Adderall or Modafinil to aid their concentration while studying.

The effects of the drugs include increasing wakefulness and improving long term con-

centration.

A huge 79 per cent admitted that they would consider taking the drug to aid their study prompting fears that there may not be enough conventional support for students suffering from stress.

The sample of 240 students brought to light a worrying trend among first years taking the drug, with just under 14 per cent of those asked admitting to taking it. (continued on page 5)

IS YORK GIVING IN TO THE STUDY DRUG REVOLUTION? FEATURE: I SPENT A NIGHT IN WILLOW SOBER pg17

SCENE: THE NOSTALGIA ISSUE

SPORT: COLLEGE FOOTBALL pg30-31

2 NEWS

YORK VISION

Tuesday January 14, 2014

COMEDY LEGEND STARS IN STUDENT FILM

BY JACK GEVERTZ COMEDY LEGEND Ricky Tomlinson is to perform a guest stint in a film by a group of final year students at the University.

The star, who is best known for his role as Jim Royle in sitcom The Royle Family, will make an appearance in the 20 minute comedy movie.

The film, which is called Psyched, features a boy called Clive whose disastrous peformance causes his psychic licence to be revoked by the Ghost Union.

The boy then has to learn what it means to be dead before he can contact the department again.

Co-writer and director Ellie Utting said that Mr. Tomlinson would not be visiting the University, but instead would have his scenes shot at a venue in Liverpool.

She added that news of his appearance was “wonderful” and that the project couldn’t have found anyone better for the part.

Psyched is appealing for extras to come forward and for funding support. To make a contribution or to star, please visit psychedfilm.co.uk.

‘EY UP RICKY!

YORKVISION

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Scene Editorial list in pullout Front page photo: Jack Western Opinions expressed in York Vision are not necessarily those of the Editors, senior editorial team, membership, or advertisers. Every effort is made to ensure all articles are as factually correct as possible at the time of going to press, given the information available.

Copyright Vision Newspapers, 2013.

Printed by Mortons of Horncastle.

NO STRAIGHT ANSWER CONCERNED STUDENTS have recently slammed a JCRC decision to co-opt a heterosexual student as LGBTQ Officer.

However, new James College chair Gareth Dybiec takes a different view: “Our main goal is that the LGBTQ community feels represented within the College and across University. It is my belief that Lewis Patel will do a brilliant job in representing these students.”

Dybiec commented on why Patel will be a good officer, “Although it is true that he does not self-define himself into that group, I have witnessed his passion and determination for this role. We have followed all the correct procedures and tried our best to follow both Unive r s i t y and College rules.

“We have managed to come to a happy agreement, with the LGBTQ community, that Lewis’s official title will be ‘Supporting Officer’.

“Although I realise some people may wish to discuss this decision, I am more than happy to sit with any-

BY LEON MORRIS

body who wishes to speak to me.”

However, YUSU LGBTQ Officers Maddie Boden and Conor Roche appeared to have been left in the dark concerning recent changes on James’ JCRC. “We haven’t even met the person [Patel] who volunteered themselves to help.”

“We do plan on having a discussion about how they might be able to help out the Network, but as of right now the James College LGBTQ rep position is vacant.”

College Officer Mike Britland told Vision: “As far as I’m concerned, it’s entirely a matter for the LGBTQ students of James College to discuss and decide how they’d like to be represented.”

Ex-LGBTQ Officer Helena Horton told Vision, “Regardless of intentions, lived experience is an incredibly important part of the role. LGBTQ students can understand each others sexuality issues in a way that I don’t feel heterosexual people can fully empathise with.”

The LGBTQ Officer protects the welfare of LGBTQ students by holding drop-in sessions, providing information and running college welfare campaigns.

Photo Credit: Hannah Bantock

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YORK VISION

NEWS

Tuesday January 14 2014

3

YORK VISION EXCLUSIVE

READY FOR A PLOUGHING

BY PATRICK GREENFIELD

SNOW CHAOS at the University of York looks to be a thing of the past after a Freedom of Information Act request revealed the comprehensive Severe Weather Planning procedures created by the Estates Department.

Grounds staff are equipped with one snow blower, four trailed gritters, three snow ploughs and a small army of tractors to deal with freezing weather. The department is on standby until early April to deal with every eventuality.

Staff begin severe weather operations at 6am when frost or snow is expected, with two teams of six patrolling the campus on a fortnightly rota. From the Vice Chancellor’s drive to the Science Park, grounds staff cover the entire campus in the gritting operation.

With the freezing weather in the USA expected to cross the Atlantic in the coming fortnight, the university is ready for whatever the Arctic storm brings.

WE CANTOR BELIEVE IT! UNI SPLASHES 7K ON PARTY CANAPÉS: £576

CALL ON ME

3 COURSE MEAL: £3808 WINE: £1828.50 MINERAL WATER: £45 ROOM SETUP: £264 MIC, PA AND MUSIC: £424 TOTAL: £6945.50

EUROTRIP

BY DAVE WASHINGTON THE UNIVERSITY of York’s new Vice-Chancellor Koen Lamberts has revealed plans to focus on acquiring more EU funding, as well as overhauling the University’s current strategy plans.

70.2 billion pounds will be made available over the next seven years by the European Union through a new research funding programme called Horizon 2020, which Lamberts is hoping to utilise.

David Duncan, University Secretary and Registrar, said: “The VC is very keen that we maximise the opportunities created by this programme. This means having strong partners in Europe and excellent support for academics so they can attract more European research funds.”

YUSU President Kallum Taylor has praised the idea, adding that it “will see York become a stronger global competitor and open up so many more new doors for our students.”

BY JO BARROW FORMER VICE-CHANCELLOR Brian Cantor bowed out by splurging £7,000 on a wining and dining extravaganza, Vision can reveal.

The party of 64, comprised mostly of university donors and benefactors, nibbled on £576 worth of canapés as they listened to a student jazz trio.

They then went on to guzzle a three course meal that costed a huge £3808, or £59.50 per person, and drink their way through £1828.50 of wine.

The party was held at the five star luxury Cedar Court Grand Hotel in York last term to say farewell to York’s notorious Vice

Chancellor before he left for the University of Bradford.

York Vision acquired the details through a Freedom of Information Act which requested the financial details of Brian Cantor’s leaving party.

In their response, the University pointed out that the reception and dinner “was an opportunity to thank the outgoing Vice-Chancellor for 11 years of service to the University of York, and to build stronger relationships with key donors and benefactors.”

They added, “The total cost of the evening was a fraction of the amount donated by Brian Cantor to the University every year for the last four years, and a small

TAYLOR IN NUS PRESIDENT BID? YUSU PRESIDENT Kallum Taylor is rumoured to be considering a bid for the NUS Presidency.

A coy Taylor told Vision, “I haven’t ruled it out yet. I’m keeping half an eye on it.”

The current President Toni Pearce is expected re-run for the position.

If elected, Taylor would be the second NUS leader to have been educated at the University of York.

John Randall held the position for two years between 1973 and 1975.

It is unclear whether Taylor would run as an independent candidate or seek the support of Labour Students.

fraction of the total donations of all the benefactors who attended the event.”

Ursula Wild, a third year English and Related Literature Student commented, “For that amount of people, that’s an extravagant amount of money!

There are so many better things it could be spent on – helping us out with the cost of books each term for a start!”

It is not the first time that Brian Cantor has found himself under financial scrutiny, after a York Vision investigation in 2010 revealed that the VC had claimed £135,000 in expenses between 20072010, including a £141 limo transfer to Heslington East campus.

BY POPPY DANBY

A CAMPAIGN aimed to encourage students to report crime and suspicious behavior will be launched next week.

The ‘Call It In’ scheme will focus on educating students about different channels for reporting crime, when to make a report and the positive effects of doing so.

Plans also include increased access to non-emergency help from Police, Security and designated external agencies.

Founder of the campaign, George Offer, told Vision: “We want to ensure more students know how and when to report crimes and make it as easy and unintimidating as possible.”

Launching in Week 3, the campaign’s appointment booking service will become operational.

The service will enable students to set up confidential meetings with both campus Security and the Police to discuss issues and concerns in a confidential environment, without having to go through the formal process of using the 999/101 system.

“People don’t come to university knowing how to take action against suspicious behaviour, especially in a new environment with people you don’t know but have to live with, for example in halls”, stated a third year student.

“Being able to discuss issues anonymously will help problems to be resolved much sooner.”

To request an appointment students can visit the YUSU Helpdesk.

NOT MUCH, NISA POTENTIAL PLANS to provide another Nisa supermarket as part of a small retail development on Heslington East are currently in discussion.

Nisa, which recently replaced Costcutter, will be set to become a monopoly on all campuses if plans go through.

“Nisa is certainly monopolisation,” James Treasurer Vinh Dang commented.

David Duncan of The University of York told Vision, “The supermarket will be a similar size and will stock similar goods to the one at Market Square.”

4 NEWS

YORK VISION

Tuesday January 14 2014

YORK VISION EXCLUSIVE FAIR HOUSING

BY PATRICK GREENFIELD

PERFECT PETER

BY JACK GEVERTZ MAIL ON SUNDAY columnist Peter Hitchens and Deputy Labour leader Harriet Harman were “probably the only two people at the University” who didn’t take drugs in the 1970s, it’s been claimed.

Newspaper journalist Hitchens says in a column for the MailOnline that people have told him that he and the deputy leader of the opposition were probably the only two students at the University who didn’t “smoke dope” in the early 1970s.

He wrote, in an article titled ‘The question is not who is taking drugs, but who isn’t’: “People have told me since – and they were only half-joking – that Harriet Harman and I were probably the only two people at the University of York in the early 1970s who didn’t smoke dope.”

When Vision contacted Mr. Hitchens for comment he said that he “assumed” it happened but he didn’t think that he was wrong.

“I never saw, or sat in a room with, anyone who took drugs, nor did anyone tell me that this is what they did. They would have known I would have disapproved. I assumed that it happened, and I don’t think I was wrong,” he said.

TO ‘THE’ OR NOT TO ‘THE’ ‘THE UNIVERSITY of York’ will be no more, Vision can confirm.

Bosses have announced that a gradual shift will take place to alter the name of the University from ‘The University of York’ to ‘University of York’.

The move was confirmed as part of a refining of York’s visual identity following the introduction of a new website design in November.

A spokesperson said via Facebook: “The ‘The’ has been removed. It is being slowly being [sic] phased out and the visual identity and style guides are currently being revised to reflect the change.”

SAFE CHEMISTRY

THE CHEMISTRY department has been described as a “safe and supportive” place for LGBT students in a survey conducted by a professor in the department.

David Smith, who can be found on Twitter @professor_ dave, decided to ask ‘out’ LGBT students in his department about their experience studying Chemistry at York.

The small-scale, anonymous survey asked four questions, including whether it was important to have ‘out’ members of staff in the department and what more the Chemis-

BY HELENA HORTON try department can do to help LGBT students.

The results, which are now being considered by their departmental Diversity Committee, were overwhelmingly positive, with students stating that the department was doing enough to support LGBT students.

One student stated that having LGBT role models in the department, such as Dr. Smith, helped their coming out process, and that it was a very important thing to have.

The department was described as a “safe and supportive environment for LGBT students.”

Smith commented; “As a gay academic myself, I was really pleased to see that our students considered the department to be a welcoming place for students, irrespective of sexual orientation or identity.

“They all felt well supported, and experienced effectively no homo/transphobia from other students. It has not always been like this in UK chemistry departments - nor is it still in some.

THE BEST housing for York students will be on show at the first ever YUSU Housing Fair in week four.

Over 1,000 quality rooms available for rent in the next academic year will be on display from 11am-3pm in James Dining Hall and YourSpace on Friday 31st January.

Students will have the chance to meet landlords, speak to Student Support Services and book property viewings.

The University’s controversial approved accommodation list for 2014 will also be released on the day. In October, Vision revealed serious flaws with the favoured Private Sector List, with potentially fatal health and safety violations in a quarter of homes sampled in May 2013.

“It was also particularly interesting to see the impact which students feel that our ‘out’ role models have had in the department - I had hoped it might have some impact, but was amazed to see how positive the student’s responses were.

“I think there is perhaps a message here for other scientists who may think that talking about their personal life is ‘not relevant’. I am sure the department’s hard work on diversity issues, such as our Gold Athena Swan award for women in science have also significantly helped.”

TRIMBLE TREMBLE STAFF v UNI

BY CALLUM SHANNON UNIVERSITY RADIO York’s flagship film sitcom Trimble, written by Edward Greenwood and produced

by John Wakefield, is a finalist for the prestigious 2014 BBC Audio Drama Awards.

Trimble is now a finalist for the Best Online/Non-Broadcast category, alongside Big Finish’s Dr Who: Dark Eyes and Spiteful Puppet’s Hood: Nobel Secrets.

The show, a sitcom revolving around the titular character’s attempts to get back into the police force from which he has been expelled from for unknown reasons, originally began life as Dramasoc’s Play in a Day. Producer John Wakefield admitted he was “gobsmacked” at the news that his show had been nominated for such a high status award.

“To be a final-

ist in an award ceremony where other finalists include Simon Russell Beale and John Finnemore’s ‘Cabin Pressure’ which starred Benedict Cumberbatch is just astonishing,” he told York Vision.

Writer Edward Greenwood added: “Myself, my brother James and my school friend Edmund had toyed with writing sitcoms in the past, including a noir detective sitcom, and this seemed like a good chance to test out some ideas I’d been thinking about.”

Trimble was recorded last term in V/045 in front of a live studio audience featuring a fully costumed cast and a jazz band with Lewis Chandler playing the titular role.

All recorded episodes are available on the URY podcast.

URY scooped two awards at the Student Radio Awards last November, being runner up in best speech programming and picking up a bronze Kevin Greening Award.

National... Greenwood

BY DAVE WASHINGTON UNI CHALLENGE is set to come to York on Saturday, as York’s student team will face their staff counterparts in an event set to be aired on ITV. Adam Koper, Jack Alexander, Josef Crowther and Alasdair Middleton will be representing the university in the forthcoming series of University Challenge, and are set to test their knowledge against a staff team comprising of Jane Grenville, John Robinson, Debbie Smith and Graham Gilbert.

The event, set to start at 8pm in the Roger Kirk Centre, is held annually, but more emphasis is being placed on it this year,

with ITV filming for the first time.

YUSU Academic Officer Dan Whitmore told Vision: “Once again the time has come for our freshly recruited University Challenge team to go into intellectual battle.

“This time, however, they will be taking on four members of the university’s senior management team in an attempt to show that students know what’s best.

“It’s completely free, so why not pop down, have a cheeky pint and watch our finest show the staff how it’s done.”

Although the event is free, students are encouraged to join the guestlist.

YORK VISION

NEWS

Tuesday January 14, 2014

YORK VISION EXCLUSIVE FOUNDING HUB

BY HELENA HORTON

THERE ARE plans for a new multi-purpose building to be built on Hes East for a possible foundation programme aimed at overseas students who want to enroll at the University.

The building will be located near Langwith and will contain extra teaching rooms, lecture theatres, study space, and a café.

It would also be used by YUSU for additional space for student clubs and society activities in the evenings. Kallum Taylor is very enthusiastic about the idea and has requested that it should incorporate a sprung floor.

This follows news that Hes East will be undergo extensive developments, including two extra colleges, a restaurant, hotel, spa, and shop.

THE UNI THAT NEVER SLEEPS

PURPLE HAZE

BY LEON MORRIS

VANBRUGH CHAIR Michael Duncan has slammed the university’s decision for Constantine College’s new colours.

Due to open in September 2014, the ninth college will bear the purple colours of Vanbrugh.

Duncan told Vision: “Purple is Vanbrugh’s colour and it would be ridiculous for any other college to have the same. For one thing, how would you be able to tell the two apart during sport matches? The university should reconsider and give Constantine a colour that starts to create its college identity without threatening to undermine Vanbrugh’s.”

DING DING

BY JACK GEVERTZ

THE NEW Cycle Alert device is now in stock at YUSUowned Your Shop.

The University becomes the first in the country to stock the safety gadget which has been introduced following a rise in the number of collisions between cyclists and vehicles on the road.

The device works with sensors which are fitted to a vehicle, a cab-mounted device and a tag that is fitted to the bicycle or worn by a cyclist on their helmet or person.

The three units will work in sync with each other, with the cab-mounted device alerting the driver either by warning or a flashing light when a cyclist is close by.

YUSU-owned Your Shop is currently selling the gadget at £5.

The devices originally went live across the Unibus travel service on 10 October.

MY MODAFINIL NIGHTMARE I began taking Modafinil around some intense deadlines in second year. It was the perfect thing to take so I could power through the late nights without getting tired, and although there wasn’t a really noticeable high like with recreational drugs, I looked back on the time spent studying and was amazed at what I’d achieved.

I brushed off the side effects of jitteriness and losing my appetite entirely at first, but I soon found myself de-

pending on it to get out of bed for seminars each day. There was a weird disconnect between how I felt - amazing - and how I looked - like I was falling apart at the seams. I was haggard, irritable and insular and the weight just dropped off me.

I decided to just stop taking them all together in the end; it was always too tempting to just buy one more - it’s not chemically addictive, I think - but it’s definitely habit forming! I slept for about 30 hours when I stopped taking it in the end!

[continued from front page] However, third years and above were more likely to take it weekly, with many citing the constant pressure from dissertations and increased workloads as a contributory factor The results reveal that over twice as many York students take the prescription medication as students at the University of Cambridge, after a Varsity poll put the figure at 10 per cent and at almost three times as many as the University of Oxford, whose student newspaper Cherwell put the figure at 7 per cent.

The “smart drugs” have come under increasing scrutiny over the last five years with some reports saying that as many as one in four students across the country have taken the pills.

One third year student explained his experience on Modafinil: “In the past I have used it to get through all night study-sessions. It’s legal, very low cost (a couple of pounds per pill) and, based on my Googling research, safe to use.

“When I’m studying, I often find myself absentmindedly checking Facebook or finding other distractions.

When I take Modafinil, I find that I’m more focused on my work, and the very idea of procrastination is annoying.

It gives you a buzz (similar to coffee): you aren’t tired, and you can concentrate easily on one task for hours without a break.”

However, respondents to the survey warned of negative side effects such as “really jittery heart and legs”, “couldn’t get to sleep for hours” and “constantly needing the bathroom”. Other students noted significant weight loss after study binges on the pills, which list diminished appetite as a side effect.

Several students admit-

ted to selling the drug as a way to make some quick money with little risk. One student explained his decision to supply Modafinil to his friends, “It retails very cheaply online, but a lot of people are sketchy about buying something they’re uncertain of the legality of.

“It’s very easy just to bulk buy them and sell them on for a small profit around essay deadlines or exams. I don’t even have to leave the library to do it.”

The drug is currently listed as a Prescription Only Medication in the UK, which means that a limited number of the pills can be ordered from overseas legally.

However, not every student will be rushing to make the most of the quick access to more efficient studying, one third year PPE student said: “Stress management and organisation are key life skills that students must learn.

“Taking drugs to take the edge off and concentrate more is blatant cheating. I’m ashamed that so many students take these drugs.”

George Offer, YUSU Welfare Officer commented: “The risks of Modafinil are well documented, and I don’t think I need to repeat them, but I strongly recommend any student currently taking or considering taking any sort of drugs to improve their study carefully look through the information available.

“There’s little to no good empirical work suggesting that these drugs can improve students’ performance in assessments, but they’re fraught with health risks.

“My advice: don’t take prescription drugs without the advice of your doctor, definitely don’t import prescription drugs and, don’t even think about selling them.”

VOICE OF YORK VISION: PAGE 12

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YORK VISION

NEWS

NISA MISTAKE’S

BY JACK GEVERTZ

CAMPUS STORE Nisa received more than 100 complaints over a grammar error on a sign, a source has told Vision.

Bungling Nisa bosses sparked a Twitter storm after their new student branch featured a rogue apostrophe on a sign above the cash registers.

Instead of reading “Thanks for shopping with us” the sign said “Thank’s for shopping with us”.

The blunder attracted more than 100 complaints from savvy shoppers, according to a source at the Market Square store.

But one of the shop’s competitors was also left a little red-faced after blasting the store in a Twitter post only to make the opposite mistake.

Students were quick to point out that Your Shop’s tweet, which said: “poor grammar on one of our competitors signs. #grammarpolice,” was actually missing an apostrophe.

Vision has attempted to contact the University’s Retail Operations Manager for a response, but has not received one.

ALL QUIET ON THE EASTERN FRONT

BY JACK GEVERTZ

BULGARIAN AND Romanian students fear losing their student loans after the government forced a nationwide freeze on students from Bulgaria and Romania claiming.

A Student Loans Company (SLC) investigation has led to thousands of students from Romania and Bulgaria being stripped of vital loans and maintenance grants.

Some have even been told to start repaying money because Student Finance England is under the impression that they have quit their course.

Although York’s Romanian Society has said that no Romanian students at the University are believed to be affected, Vision has learned that some Bulgarian students fear losing cash following the freeze.

“I, personally, am not (yet) af-

fected by this; I hope I will also not be,” Vi k t o ria Dimitrova, a secondyear Politics with I n t e r n a tional Relations student said.

“When I was applying, me and most people I know applied through an agency which has made a list of good universities for the preferred degree, so that might be one reason why there is ‘concentration’... Moreover, me, and all Bulgarians, have come to this country to receive what we possibly can’t in our own: proper education and possibilities for a better future.”

Prospective students have also come forward to slam the government’s move, claiming that it is “outrageous”, “discriminatory” and has put them off applying to York.

One anonymous prospective student said: “I find this absolutely outrageous and, quite frankly, I am fed up by the abnormal use

of the unfair and negative rhetoric used so far.”

“Why is this happening only to Romanians and Bulgarians you may ask? I will tell you why!

The single reason why some university loans for students from these two countries were frozen was only based on the grounds of their nationality. We live in the 21st century for crying out loud!”

“These actions and policies implemented by the British government are more than ridiculous and can only be defined as discriminatory!”

The move comes in response to a surge in SLC claima n t s f r o m those two countries coming to study at British institutions.

A source told the Daily Tel-

Tuesday January 14, 2014

egraph that only a quarter of Romanian and Bulgarian students had confirmed their right to three year residency in the UK a test deemed critical to be able to claim.

The SLC has said it will not provide funding for Bulgarian and Romanian students until they have proved their right to stay.

But NUS International Officer Daniel Stevens slammed the government for failing to provide enough communication to students affected by the move.

He told The Independent: “The lack of communication from the government to affected students is unacceptable. This situation is disrupting people’s lives and has inevitably led to much confusion.

The government needs to take this situation seriously.”

All concerned students are encouraged to speak to university support services.

KIRKMAN FOR NUS BID MCC’D YORK STUDENT Maddy Kirkman will stand for the NUS Disabled Students’ Officer position this Spring.

Kirkman, an active member of the Disabled Student Network at York, has decided to go for the national role.

“After much daydreaming, deliberation and conversations with other activists, I have decided to stand,” Kirkman told Vision.

“This is one of the most exciting and daunting challenges I’ve ever taken on, but that’s because this is such a crucial moment for the disabled students’ movement.”

If elected, Kirkman would assume the full-time sabbatical position at the NUS on July 1st.

BY PATRICK GREENFIELD

BY PATRICK GREENFIELD

Support from YUSU has poured in with YUSU President Kallum Taylor commenting, “Maddie will be a fantastic candidate for this position and YUSU back her all the way.”

Thomas Ron, YUSU Disabilities Officer, has also commented on Kirkman’s decision, adding, “We have been enormously fortunate to have her at Network and it is clear she is appreciated for her work on the NUS Committee.

I hope that she has a good run”.

Nominations close on February 5th and the election takes place at NUS Disabled Students’ Conference in the first week of March.

DEPUTY VICE-CHANCELLOR Jane Grenville has reminded students to submit their Mitigating Circumstances Claims before they receive results.

She commented, “The purpose of the Mit Circs system is to ensure that the playing field is levelled for students at a disadvantage while the game is still in play, rather than after the final whistle has blown.”

THERE IS to be a new ViceChancellor for research at the University.

Debbie Smith, who used to head the department of Biology, recently agreed to take u p the post of ProVice-Chancellor for research.

She is aiming to “refresh the University’s research strategy and ensure that York remains

at the forefront of research-intensive universities in the UK.” Smith has held many important academic positions in the past, including Deputy Head of the Biochemistry Department and Deputy Head of the Graduate School of Life Sciences and Medicine at Imperial College. She is also currently Co-Chair of the Wellcome Trust Interview Panel.

She will be instated as the Vice-Chancellor for research this term.

Claims typically spike during exam periods and results season, and all claims should be made before results are known. Post-results claims are treated as appeals and are handled centrally by Special Cases Committee.

Full details of the University of York’s Mitigating Circumstances Claims policy is available online at https://www. york.ac.uk/students/support/ academic/mitigation/.

NEW VC FOR RESEARCH

YORK VISION

NEWS

Tuesday January 14, 2014

NEW VC TAKES OFFICE

7

DAVID LEVENE iS

THE COUNCILLOR

IN KOEN WE TRUST

BY HELENA HORTON

Image Credit: Warwick Uni

NEW VICE-CHANCELLOR, Koen Lamberts took office at the start of term and did a speech about why he decided to come from Warwick to York.

He said that he has spent time in the past few months talking to staff and students to discover what the ethos of York was, and to understand why it is “miles ahead of many other Universities of a similar age”.

Lamberts enthused that “[York] has a great ethos of inclusivity, ethos and openness” after taking over from Jane Grenville, who was acting Vice-

Chancellor after Brian Cantor left the post earlier to pursue a career at Bradford University.

He has plans to “ensure York becomes an even better University”, including making important decisions about the growth of the University, obtaining more funding for research and building international credibility.

The new Vice-Chancellor ended his speech, which he did at York Talks on the 8th January, by urging students and staff to “show a hunger for success and a passionate desire to communicate the benefits of our research to the world.”

HONOURY DEGREES ARE OUT

BY PATRICK GREENFIELD

THE UNIVERSITY of York has announced it will award eight honorary doctorates at the University’s graduation ceremonies on 24th and 25th January.

Sigrid Rausing, Rae McGrath, Koji Omi, Philip Moore, Claire Tomalin, Dr Richard Barber, Professor Sir Christopher Llewellyn Smith and Alice Maynard will receive the awards.

Rausing is the founder and chair of the Sigrid Rausing Trust, a foundation that supports human rights globally. The trust has given away over £208.3 million to causes around the world since 1995.

Rausing studied at the Honoured... McGrath

University of York from 1983-1986.

A leading member of the International Campaign to Ban Landmines, McGrath gave the acceptance speech for the Nobel Peace Prize in 1997 when the organisation won the award. He convinced Princess Diana to support the campaign in 1997 and has worked in conflict zones around the world to aid the cause. He is now an Associate in the Post War Reconstruction & Development Unit at York.

Omi is a long-serving Japanese politician and campaigner. Omi is considered a pioneer in science and technology in his home country. He is credited with helping make Japan a science and technology-orientated nation.

VISION speaks to...

Firstly, Congratulations! What does honorary degree from the University of York mean to you?

Thank you. It’s amazing. It’s a bit like getting to the top of Everest (not that I ever have) without actually having to make the effort to get there. It was great getting the doctorate that I’d worked for, but I’d worked for it, whereas this is a real gift and an honour.

What gives you more satisfaction: success in business or civil rights advocacy?

Well now, that’s an interesting question. Because I’m not sure I see that there’s much difference. For me, the purpose of business is to

create a better society. I’m not saying that every business should be focused on righting the wrongs in society, but business oils the wheels of society and enable citizens to live good and fulfilling lives. So my ‘civil rights advocacy’ is mediated through my business activity and my engagement with ‘business’ is about making society a better place for the citizen.

What are the biggest challenges for disabled graduates entering the labour market in 2014?

There are enormous challenges for any graduates entering the labour market in 2014. When I graduated, it wasn’t all sweetness

Omi now runs the Science and Technology in Society forum that aims to build a global network among scientists, policy makers and business people.

Moore is a composer and organist that retired from his position as Organist and Master of the Music at York Minster in 2008. He has previously held positions at Eton College and Canterbury Cathedral, composing pieces for organ, choirs and the orchestra.

Claiming her ninth honorary doctorate, Tomallin has an astonishing literary CV. She has researched and written the biographies of Samuel Pepys, Thomas Hardy, Jane Austen and Mary Wollstonecraft, winning the Whitbread prize twice.

Dr Barber is a medieval historian and an Honorary Visiting

Professor at York, having previously won awards for his work on literature and history. He is also a specialist in the legend of King Arthur.

Sir Smith is the former Director General of the CERN project in Geneva, having enjoyed a glittering physics career. Knighted in 2001, Sir Christopher Llewellyn Smith has recently focused on the development of the United Kingdom’s fusion programme.

Maynard is a campaigner and businesswoman, holding the position of Chair at Scope and managing director of Future Inclusion Ltd. She has spent a career fighting for disabled civil rights in an array of roles. Maynard has a BA in Language from York.

The ceremonies will be held on 24th and 25th January.

ALICE MAYNARD

CHAIR OF SCOPE & MANAGING DIRECTOR OF FUTURE INCLUSION LTD

and light – I had a choice between two jobs and, fortunately, the one I chose was secure. If you’re disabled, the competition is even more fierce, and although the attitudes of many employers have improved over the years, disabled employees can still be seen as a potential burden on the firm rather than a really valuable potential employee. Disabled graduates need to demonstrate even more strongly, therefore, what their ‘unique selling point’ is and find a company that will appreciate them.

But they still need to look for somewhere they can work that they can really passionate about, though, because if you enjoy your work

you’re most likely to shine and doing something you hate is pretty miserable anyway!

Image Credit: yorkspace

–

I’M NOT really a fan of New Year resolutions, as I have a pretty terrible track record. I much prefer plans, as testified by the ‘I love spreadsheets’ mug I got for Christmas. And, as Heslington Councillor, I know there is a lot planned for the student community over the next year.

After almost 20 years, last year I was able to get new lighting installed on Retreat Lane.

But that was always just the first step, and next I hope to see improvements to the lighting on Walmgate Stray. Staying on the topic of student safety, I’ll be looking to help progress a University Night Marshall Scheme. Started by York St John where it has proved very popular amongst students, this would mean on a night out you would have someone nearby who could help out if anything goes wrong.

There have been recent reports in the press about privatising student loans, as well as big cuts to support grants. At the last Council Meeting, Neil Barnes (one of the Hull Road Councillors) and myself proposed a motion, asking the Government to reconsider these policies. This was passed, despite the Coalition parties voting against, and this term I’ll be following this up with the University Labour Club with a campaign on student support. Watch out for us on Vanbrugh stalls.

Housing continues to be a hot topic. This month the Council launched its accreditation scheme to ensure rented properties are up to scratch. There is a lot of work to be done here, and we’ll be keeping a close eye to see whether the voluntary approach works. There are also discussions between Councillors, YUSU, and groups like Parish Councils, on how to get improvements to Heslington East accommodation and facilities, something I know is important to first years living there, second and third years who might want to stay there, as well as the wider community.

After I did a spot of lobbying, the much discussed, long anticipated University Road cycle lane will finally happen, and of course, we’ll be getting those pesky Retreat Lane bollards sorted.

Finally, efforts to engage students in the local community will continue apace, and top of the list is making us, your elected representatives, even more accountable. A ballot box for Hes West was introduced in Vanbrugh in 2005; I secured one for Hes East in 2011; and this year I’ll be trying to get one for Halifax. After some not-so-well-attended campus advice surgeries, I will hopefully be taking part in YUSU’s Officer Question Time events. And to let you know what I’m up to, I’ll be writing more comment pieces for Vision like this. A special New Year treat, just for you.

8

YORK VISION

NEWS

Tuesday January 14, 2014

JCRC PR

Vision's James Scott looks at pay rises, animal testing and a visit to Cambridge

Student Press ONE MORE FOR MANY students, the beginning of a new year represents the chance for a new start.

Less auspiciously the beginning of a new year also inevitably heralds a pay rise for some of the nation’s most hardup citizens, the University Vice-Chancellors.

It seems that the furore over the generous perks awarded to Vice-Chancellors are not limited to York. Student newspapers up and down the country have been up in arms at the extravagant pay rises accorded to their VCs. Leeds’s LS reports that their Vice-Chancellor received a £36000 pay rise in the last year while presiding over a period of falling surpluses. Whilst this is at the higher end of the spectrum, Vice-Chancellors nationwide did earn themselves a £22000 pay rise year, representing a 8.1% pay rise, whilst many of their staff suffer wage freezes, or even real wage falls.

However it would be wrong to tar all Vice-Chancellors with the same brush; Exeter’s Exepose reports that their VC turned has down his pay rise four times in the last five years.

Animal testing also seems to have struck a chord with student media this year. Newcastle’s Courier carries an interview with a Professor who recently ran into a furore after it was discovered by an undercover investigation by the British Union For The Abolition Of Vivisection that he was testing on wild-caught baboons in Kenya, where welfare standards are lower than in the UK. The revelations created a national outrage with even Joanna Lumley becoming involved.

Once that had happened the poor chap had no chance at all, and the University abandoned the experiments.

Finally, Cambridge has been abuzz this week with the arrival of Prince William on campus. The Prince created somewhat of an uproar over the lack of his academic credentials this week; however it wasn’t this that was exercising The Tab readers. The controversial tabloid created the hashtag #WheresWilly, so students could keep tabs on the whereabouts of their royal colleague. Not surprisingly given the Prince’s history and the fact that it’s just a little invasive, The Tab has come under fire yet again from the international press for its reporting, but you can’t deny that they know how to create a story.

COLLEGE...

BY LEON MORRIS

THE UNIVERSITY has confirmed that plans for a tenth college at York are underway.

The new accommodation blocks will become the fourth college on Heslington East and will be modelled after current development, Constantine College, due to open in September 2014.

The plans are due to be debated and potentially passed at University Council later this year.

The proposals have seen some reservations from YUSU president Kallum Taylor claiming the university may open the door to “discontent”.

“We currently support the University’s efforts to grow, diversify and compete up until the point where the basic needs, conveniences and general experiences of our members are compromised… Currently they’re just in line with that as discussions on wider Hes East facilities and services have developed considerably, but we need them to sign off !

“If Constantine opens without the supermarket, health centre and pharmacy the University will be opening the door to a lot of discontent.”

PLANS UNDERWAY... DUNCAN However, York Registrar David Duncan has insisted that the University is doing everything to uphold their obligations to residents on Hes East.

“We are in active discussion at the moment to build a small supermarket, around five additional shops and a GP surgery on the east campus. These facilities are increasingly necessary on the campus as the number of students and staff living and working there grows.”

Duncan further confirmed plans to develop a tenth college; “The ninth college will open in September 2014. We have begun plans for a 10th college, which would be situated to the east of Constantine. This would be complemented by new dining and study space facilities on east.”

YORK VISION INTERVIEWS..

BY LEON MORRIS WITH A new batch of representative leaders amongst our collegiate ranks, we at York Vision made it our mission to meet up with every chair and president to get to know to them personally, whilst hoping to get some insights into what their hopes and ambitions for their committee over the next year would be.

We asked each college leader their goals and vision for the college, what could be done differently, and what they are about to do with their first few weeks, amongst other questions.

Finally, we ensured that the new chairs/presidents told us what they thought of their college spirit in just three adjectives.

We’re looking forward to seeing what they have to bring to the collegiate system over the next year.

MICHAEL DUNCAN VANBRUGH

DUNCAN, coupled with previous experience on the Vanbrugh JCRC, is very committed to his new role.

Keen to visit every kitchen once a term, Duncan has his heart set on becoming an approachable chair, a mean feat with the distanced nature of the college’s blocks.

Michael, confident and determined, is set to turn the college around.

I think Vanbrugh... ‘Can’t be done’.

LOUSSIN-TORAH PILIKIAN HALIFAX LOUSSIN, despite being uncontested, rose from the ranks of the Ents to ensure a continued success in Halifax.

With huge ambitions to focus on offcampus students more, big formal events and JJ’s, Loussin is a respectably passionate president.

I think Halifax is... visionary, enthusiastic, determined.

GIMLI, SON OF GLOIN LANGWITH

GIMLI (formerly Symone), is set to transform her new college into a money churning charity machine, with a huge commitment to RAG and Volunteering.

Gimli is not deterred by the daunting task of campaigning hard for much awaited communal space. Very passionate, this President is one to watch.

I think Langwith is... supportive, infectious and inclusive.

YOURSHOP DONATIONS A LOCAL charity has scooped a £250 donation from YUSUowned Your Shop thanks to a new token scheme.

Launched last term, independent mental health service charity, York Mind, beat off competition from the Railway Children and Cardiac Risk in the Young in the RAG-chosen charity race.

BY JACK GEVERTZ Students were able to select one of the three charity boxes to place a token in when they purchased the store’s £3.29 Meal Deal.

Winning charity York Mind helps individuals to recover from a range of mental health conditions and helps them to achieve

goals that will aid them towards recovery, social inclusion and integration.

This term’s charities have been chosen by the University’s colleges, with students able to back Langwith’s Hope for Children, Halifax’s Macmillan Cancer Support and Alcuin’s Great Ormond Street Hospital.

NEWS

YORK VISION

Tuesday January 14, 2014

REVIEW

SAUCY STUDENTS’ SEX SECRETS

9

TWEETS OF THE WEEK

BY JACK GEVERTZ

LEWIS RATTO ALCUIN

GARETH DYBIEC JAMES

EXPERIENCED JCRC member Lewis was approachable, bubbly and bursting with enthusiasm.

Keen to focus on continuing to improve the college’s weight in campus politics, Lewis is also keen to continue the massive welfare successes of the last committee.

More notably, however, Lewis has a renewed focus on postgraduates and college participation.

GARETH, despite being a first year, has grasped the failings of the past committee and has turned it around.

Now, armed with a full committee, Gareth is keen to introduce a Volunteering Award and would like to ensure that his college is primarily known for it’s RAG and Volunteering efforts.

BEN LEATHAM DERWENT

TARA ANNISON GOODRICKE

FIGHTING massive competition, Ben has breathed a new breath of life into his committee, with a strong emphasis upon support and personal development, something this dedicated leader is keen to improve on.

Despite being the party college, Ben’s focus on welfare and support is interestingly reinvigorating.

I think Derwent is... inclusive, enthusiastic, thriving.

I think James is... Sport, volunteering, RAG.

FRESH, keen and excitable, Tara is very keen to pursue ongoing Hes East developments including a medical centre, larger study spaces and a supermarket.

With a continued focus on strong welfare and a strong leadership, Tara believes she has an excellent committee behind of her.

I think Goodricke is... Green, energetic, fun.

NOMINATE NOW YUSU PRESIDENT Kallum Taylor has encouraged all students to participate in the upcoming YUSU elections, telling Vision of the need to have a more diverse cross section of the student community participating in the campaign.

“This year we really want to see just more than the ‘usual suspects’ in the election and get candidates from different backgrounds, like Health Sciences students and postgrads.

BY JAMES SCOTT “It’s a real shame that last year only 28% of our candidates were women, and we really want to improve that this year!”

Nominations for candidates close on Friday week four, while the Full time Officers debate, which will be hosted by FA Chairman Greg Dyke, will take place on the 18th with voting opening on the 24th.

More than 550,000 visits have been made from York to one of the UK’s biggest online porn sites in the last year.

Randy residents spent nine minutes and 42 seconds scouring sexual content and looked at more than six pages during each of their saucy visits.

But this was slightly less than the average of eight pages per visit across England.

The data, revealed by X-rated PornHub, helps to uncover the local online preference of residents in the York area.

It was revealed in a week where local residents earned a place in the top ten on a nationwide ‘one night stand’ poll.

Ranking in ninth place, four percent of the 42 percent who responded yes to ‘Do you have regular one night stands?’ were from York.

Just over 2,000 single women and men aged over 18 were asked the question by online pharmacy UKMedix. com which specialises in sexual health.

Liverpool topped the poll, with 13 percent of respondents admitting to having regular one night stands residing there.

But it was Cardiff that was revealed as the most ‘sexually adventurous’ city, beating stiff competition from Newcastle and Edinburgh.

Sophie Gadd @sophie_gadd “University is the best time of your life if you get huge kicks from sitting silently in a library for 10 hours”

george b hughes @georgebhughes “why leave your bed to turn the heating on when you have the luxury of heating under your duvet with a hairdryer #studentlife”

Jo Barrow @JoBarrow “Well the rules governing YUSU election media coverage do their absolute best to make it boring for all of us, don’t they?”

11 COMMENT

YORK VISION

COMMENT

Tuesday January 14, 2014

www.yorkvision.co.uk/comment comment@yorkvision.co.uk

STUDENT DEMOCRACY NEEDS TROLLS IT’S TIME TO MAKE YUSU ELECTIONS INTERESTING AGAIN

JO BARROW @JoBarrow

Y

USU elections have come around once again with wearying inevitability. Already, would be BNOCs are stalking the corridors of power, forging alliances amongst themselves and desperately trying to find a slogan that rhymes with their surname, or donning a costume they’d willingly wear all day every day for a week, no matter how many rashes it might give them.

Spare a thought for the poor student hack, forced to cover the elections with their identikit candidates. They’re all earnestly devoted to ‘accountability,’ ‘transparency’ and ‘YOUR Union,’ all reliant on campaign gimmicks. Threatening to overwhelm us with boring detail, they struggle to recognise that actually, yes, we are late for a lecture and don’t have time to talk about widening access to chess-boxing, and their efforts to tread the line between corporate politicking and being wo/men of the people fall short every time.

Last year’s election process was fairly dull to cover, even with a freak twitter storm during the election debate. Despite

the emergence of a strong contender to Kallum in the form of Thomas Banks, who promised to remove the napkins under the garlic bread in the Courtyard, and the gloriously bitchy household rivalry for one sabbatical officer’s position, most people recognised that we would, indeed, Keep Kallum and Carry On. This year though, anything could happen.

It is likely that the majority of the candidates for the position of Our Beloved Leader will be YUSU insiders. These former college chairs and part-time officers fear a world where their achievements in arranging bar crawls three times a term fail to impress employers who look for a little more than a strong liver and wilful masochistic tendencies, and so hope to cling onto the University bubble for just one more year (or two, in some cases).

What I’m more interested though, is the “joke” candidates who run. British student politics has had a renaissance in seemingly silly students getting a significant proportion of the vote recently. In St. Andrews, Jamie Ross explained his decision to run for his SU presidency by saying “I have a campaign budget of £103 to spend, and I plan to spend it on shoes. If I pass the minimum percentage thresh-hold of votes: free shoes.

Only you can make it happen.” Meanwhile, in Oxford, Louis Trup wrote his manifesto in crayon and had policies including double beds for all and world peace. So far, so

student-y, but actually, what’s interesting is that had St Andrew’s voted in a first past the post system, Ross would have won, and Louis Trup did actually win in Oxford.

York has fine form in this too, in 2008 our SU president was Mad Cap’n Tom Scott, who campaigned and served his time in character as a pirate. What’s happened to us since then? student politics is British politics in microcosm, stagnant, wearying and full of careerists and doublespeak, but there’s no reason it needs to stay that way.

say writing service is thriving. A quick Google search reveals 31 million results, many competing companies and most disheartening of all, countless stories of students who purchased the service and for whom things quickly went wrong. I would advise anyone even remotely tempted by essay writing services to read what has happened to other students who used them and got caught: it will quickly bring you back to your senses.

have coursework to complete and are likely to be feeling the pressure. They even appear when logged on using campus Wi-Fi. And they are of course, completely immoral.

Whilst technically not illegal, there is not a university in the country where submitting something written by one of these essay writing services would be accepted and the companies know this, hence their promise of confidentiality. Yet they still encourage students to break university rules, commit plagiarism of the highest degree and risk getting thrown out of the university, simply, so they can make a profit.

But what is worse is the way they encourage students to use their services.

“Deadline looming?” they ask, knowing full well it is. A little appeal to your desperation and academic insecurity next: “Order today and get the grade you need!” All wrapped up with a huge picture of a very frustrated and worried looking student, which they hope will be like looking into a mirror for their audience. Such a display is a shameful attempt to get what would be rule abiding but stressed students to risk getting themselves thrown out of university by playing on insecurity about their self-ability, and they should not be allowed on the internet. Adverts encouraging students to cheat should fall under the same banner as adverts that encourage minors to gamble.

The most annoying part for me is the fact that, Facebook willing, these adverts

It would be best for the entire student population to elect a candidate who has absolutely no interest in student politics This time last year, my editors thrust a comment piece upon me, “Write about why it’s important to vote” they said, and with naive gusto I threw myself into it. I wrote about “having YOUR say” and “engagement” with all the enthusiasm of someone who hadn’t really paid attention to student politics before. A year later, I return, once again to urge you to participate, but perhaps with a tad bit more cynicism.

The way I understand student politics

(which is so dreadfully concerned with democracy) is that a student union president is mostly a conduit through which the student’s ideas flow through and are then relayed to other, more powerful people who actually make a difference. It would be best then, for the entire student population and YUSU’s reputation at large, to elect a candidate who has absolutely no interest in student politics, so that our elected leaders don’t try and interfere with what the students have voted for. Just imagine what chaos could follow a students’ union who cared about things - we could even have an SU which blithely pushes through a referendum despite not reaching quorum!

Even if you disagree with this perception of SU politics, then perhaps there’s an argument for saying that really, with a year in power, the change that can be effected is so minimal that it wouldn’t be ridiculous to assume the SU staff just get on with it while their elected leaders ponce about ‘engaging students (imagine Yes, Minister on a university scale). If that’s the case, then the least the sabbs can do is adopt a comedy persona and entertain us while they do it.

If the last two years have taught us anything, it’s that York students respond to personalities. It’s just a shame that people seem to think the personalities should come with policies. I urge all of you to nominate yourself for a SU position, the less you want it, the better it is for the rest of us.

CHEATERS NEVER PROSPER THE UNIVERSITY CAN DO MORE TO PREVENT ESSAY WRITING SITES FROM ENTICING STUDENTS

CALLUM SHANNON

@Callum_Shannon

P

icture the scene: it is a cold and dark winter’s day, you have been toiling away fruitlessly with your essay all day, the ever closer deadline looming and you decide to log onto Facebook for a bit.

Perhaps you logged on to get a bit of moral support from your friends or cheer yourself up a bit by reading that one sad casual acquaintance who posts nothing but depressing rubbish latest status to remind yourself it could be worse, but instead you find yourself looking at something quite different.

Staring you in the face from your computer screen is a professionally designed advert from a company offering to write your essay for you, for what they promise is a “very reasonable rate” and with “100% confidentiality”. They even promise to tailor the grade to your specification and throw in an offer of emulating your writing style if you send them examples of past work.

Sadly, with students feeling the increased pressure from higher tuition fees and an ever declining jobs market, the es-

Adverts encouraging students to cheat should fall under the same banner as adverts that encourage minors to gamble Adverts for essay writing services have been popping up all across the country.

They are selectively programmed to appear on only student’s Facebook pages (which in the digital age when so much personal information is online is surprisingly easy) and are often packaged as “essay help” to give them a shred of legitimacy, but a second look tells you that the services they are offering fall far beyond the parameters of help. They are published with increased frequency this time of year when the companies publishing them know students

could easily be blocked. If a simple browser plugin can keep my computer totally advert free, the world’s largest social network can surely do something about this. One way we can combat these immoral adverts is to report them: one thing Facebook does allow you to do is provide feedback on the relevance of the adverts they are subjecting you to (for their advertiser’s benefit rather than yours, but it can still be useful), completing the quick one question feedback form to label them as spam when you see

One way we can combat these immoral adverts is to report them such an advert lets the social network know that you’re unhappy with them on your feed. If carried out enough, it’ll be the first step to ensuring the adverts are removed and that social media can return to being a way from students to briefly escape their academic woes, rather than be swayed by corrupt, profiteering, cheating encouraging businesses.

The university should also block these adverts on campus Wi-Fi, something else which is easy to do and would be totally in keeping with their academic integrity policy.

12 COMMENT

THE VOICE OF

YORK VISION

WE MUST STAND UP FOR OUR ROMANIAN AND BULGARIAN COLLEAGUES TO BE GLOBAL UNIVERSITY A new year, another scandal. The Daily Mail had us all worried, claiming thousands of Romanian and Bulgarian immigrants were waiting for the green light from the EU to take the UK by force, robbing their way round the Underground until they had enough money to buy a four bedroom home in Sevenoaks. Fortunately for us, January 1st was uneventful, and the droves of journalists waiting at the arrivals gate at Luton Airport went home without a scoop.

However, the news that David Willetts, the Minister for Universities and Science, has decided to listen to the bigoted rhetoric of the right wing media and play politics with the student loans of Romanians and Bulgarians is disappointing.

Whatever your thoughts on the European Union, international students are often the brightest and best in their mother nations, contributing and developing the British economy after graduation. Targeting a group for their nationality is ridiculous and every student in the United Kingdom should unite behind their Romanian and Bulgarian counterparts.

The displeasure of prospective students should be most worrying. Although no students at York have been affected by the policy change, the University of York cannot claim to be a truly global institution if it remains silent in the face of unjust persecution. Support networks at the university have helped calm students. However, they must do more to assure prospective Romanian and Bulgarian students that they are as welcome as any other nationality.

In other news, Brian Cantor went out with an expensive bang. A £7,000 tab for a party of 64 university bigwigs at a five star luxury hotel in York is indulgent at best.

Cantor achieved national notoriety in 2010 after Vision revealed that the former Vice Chancellor claimed £135,000 in expenses between 2007-2010, spending over £57,590 on plane tickets over the period. Has he really learnt his lesson?

The new VC Koen Lamberts has finally arrived, bringing with him fresh hope that York will start climbing the league tables.

We have needed a fresh start for a while and students must engage with the university and the union to improve our institution.

Expansion seems to be the priority, with a tenth college on the way. Shhh, we couldn’t put that in the news section but it’s happening. Our international reputation needs development and Lamberts has already made attracting more funding from the European Union a priority.

As YUSU president Kallum Taylor points out, expansion must be proportional and facilities for staff and students must grow with the university. Students are not just here to study and the university’s future vision must recognise that. Hes West must catch up with Hes East in the coming years and Lamberts has to make that a priority.

YORK VISION Tuesday January 14, 2014

SCHOOLBOY ERRORS

DATING LESSONS ARE BEING INTRODUCED FOR SOME SCHOOL BOYS

POPPY DANBY

@PoppyDanby

F

orget Maths and History, there’s a new educational agenda sweeping secondary schools across the country, as schoolboys are being taught how to chatup girls.

Aimed to help those who lack a positive male role model in their lives, the new mentoring scheme is designed to teach teens how to treat the opposite sex and about the importance of loving relationships.

So why is this necessary now? After all, hasn’t humanity progressed okay upto now without lessons in love? The answer is simple, as we enter 2014, we have to accept that our society is changing and as a result, so is the way in which we perceive our relationships.

No longer star-crossed lovers - a la Romeo and Juliet, kids are more likely to be under the influence of media, teenagers are now more likely to be starry-eyed sexters, with hardcore porn at their fingertips and an education that teaches them that sex is merely a biological necessity.

Headteacher, Victoria Overy, whose school will be taking part in the scheme, stated that one of the main reasons for introducing it was because: “sadly, through such easy access to pornography, the boys’ view of women has been skewed. This is hardly surprising given their objectification in this context. I mean, you hardly hear of guys sharing the best sites on where to

stream rom coms, or the magazines that give the best relationship advice. Emotions don’t really come into question. When you’re done with one woman you can just flick on to the next.

This is reflected in modern student life, with a recent NUS study noting that relationships are now built on ‘hooking up’ rather than dating, focusing on one-night stands and friends with benefits arrangements. The report also states that although the amount of sex students are engaging in may not have increased, understandings of sexuality have changed.

So why is this necessary now? After all, hasn’t humanity progressed okay so far without lessons in love?

Despite Sex Education being part of the national curriculum, this too does nothing to help the cause. Students are taught basic biological facts by their teachers, gliding past the issue of feelings that go anything beyond sexual. Sure, it’s a pretty awkward situation for both student and teacher to discuss these personal emotions, however, with now over a million children growing up without a father figure at home, where else do these young men have to turn for real-life experience and advice?

Although predominantly intended to

help males who are on free school meals, the mentoring scheme could prove to be beneficial to students across the social spectrum – particularly those at same sex schools. Having no daily interaction with girls, young men in this situation often grow up without experiencing the full reality of the opposite sex. This is something which could have a damaging effect even in the years after school, with some students at the university stating: “the boys that went to single sex schools always seem to have quite a weird view of women”.

Although this is a sweeping generalisation, it makes it clear that problems do not just arise from porn, as Overy stated, but from a lack of understanding – something which the scheme aims to improve.

Obviously, these life lessons do not come without flaws. Although designed to protect women, the scheme generalizes women in the same way that it does men.

Girls will be taught just about career aspirations, not relationships. This implies that young girls can treat men how they want and do not need guidance, leaving little scope for the mutual understanding necessary for a successful and fair relationship.

As it stands, the programme also ignores the possibility of homosexual and bisexual relationships, focusing purely on male to female interactions.

Still in their early stages, the lessons no doubt need refining in order to remove damaging constructs about sexuality and gender - making sense for them to be taught to all students. After all, who would not welcome a bit of help in those tricky teen years?

Michael Cooper

JOIN US AT YORK VISION

York Vision, the UK’s best - and most awarded - student paper, will be holding elections to choose the brand new editorial team! It’s the perfect time to get involved with the newspaper - no matter how much experience you have.

Tuesday 14th January, 19:00, P/X/001

“A superbly produced, exciting newspaper providing an excellent service to its readers” - Piers Morgan

YORK VISION

Tuesday January 14, 2014

LIPS DON’T LIE

DO CELEBRITIES EVER TRULY HELP CHARITABLE CAUSES?

ANGUS QUINN

@Angus_Quinn17

I

t’s too easy nowadays to roll your eyes whenever Paris Hilton announces, “guys I am like totally sympathetic to the plight of tigers in the Indian subcontinent,” or One Direction ask for money for malaria nets for central Africa when we all know they could literally buy thousands with their vast personal fortunes. However, of late, the role of celebrity activism in South Sudan has come under severe criticism. The role of people such as George Clooney who has been dubbed ‘Mr Sudan’ in the media has come under attack for ignoring realities of the situation in the Sudan.

Charities like UNICEF have also benefitted hugely from partnerships formed with celebrities The story the celebrities cast is one of oppression of the Christians in the south by the Islamic government of the north. Critics have pointed toward celebrity oversight of complete dysfunction of government since 2011 and questioned false promotion by stars like Clooney of the supposed ethnic narrative of the war. Colouring all celebrity activism, though, by examples like this is

hardly fair. It isn’t always a shallow publicity tool or misguided attempt to peddle a story the international community wants the world to believe.

Social justice, education and improved conditions for children are areas in which celebrity activism is hugely beneficial but also has, for many, come naturally.

Rather than seeking a publicity sticker to promote a new album or a photo opportunity to be prefixed with a reminder of a new album out, Shakira has instead (since her international breakout in the late 90s) advanced the cause of schools for poor children through The Barefoot Foundation.

Even with increased recognition, the Colombian popstar has never stopped, travelling to Bangladesh to raise awareness of the impact of Cyclone Sidr and pursuing governments around the world for investment into developing regions.

Charities like UNICEF have also benefited hugely from partnerships formed with celebrities. Selena Gomez has, for example, in her time as a Goodwill Ambassador promoted mining of conflict minerals in the Congo and supermodel Elle MacPherson has raised awareness of child abandonment in Ukraine and supported initiatives to combat it. Celebrity involvement in humanitarian issues raises their profile, but involvement of younger stars especially like Gomez means that key issues and messages are disseminated far more rapidly through social media.

Perhaps most crucially, though, celebrities can promote issues that are either censored by the international community or forgotten in commercial interests. The Armenian genocide, which saw between 1-1.5 Million Ethnic Armenians killed by the Ottoman Turkish Government between 1915-

23 is heavily disputed in the international community, with countries like Turkey and Azerbaijan denying its existence, whilst the French government recently passed a law making its denial illegal.

The supposedly shallowest celebrity family of all, the Kardashians, have consistently asserted the cause of Remembrance of the Genocide and pursued raising awareness of it in the wider community.

Kim Kardashian herself has multiple times spoken out on the issue, widely criticising the decision of Turkish Cosmopolitan for running a cover with her on it the same month as Armenian Remembrance and critising the Turkish government for attempting to cover up the genocide. In 2011 Kim even urged President Obama to move forward with formal recognition of the genocide in the United States.

George Clooney has been dubbed ‘Mr Sudan’ Additionally she has spoken out on the current plight of the Syrian-Armenian Community, an issue that has received little press coverage in the Western media. The involvement of the Kardashians in promotion of Armenian Remembrance has put the issue back on the international agenda and made it a point of conversation when governments have been so willing to sweep it under the rug.

Ultimately there will always be celebrities using causes to promote themselves, but it’s unfair to condemn all celebrities by the same brush. There are many celebrities doing amazing work so we shouldn’t condemn celebrity activism as a whole.

BENEFITS FROM BULGARIA WHY HAVE BRITONS BECOME WORKED UP ABOUT WORKERS?

TOM A-C

@IamTomAC

T

here ain’t no black in the Union Jack, I’ve checked and even double checked this. There really isn’t. There’s red, blue and white, but definitely no black. This was once the slogan of the racists who believed that to live in Britain you had to be white, and should presumably play for your local pub football team on Sundays before heading back home to beat your wife (She didn’t cook the dinner on time after all).

Now Britain is full of black people, it’s

Who we should let into our glorious and wonderful country has always caused debate and it always will cosmopolitan with all sorts of races and religions, and it’s all the more beautiful for it.

And so the anger moves away from those of colour to those from Eastern Europe.

Whom we should let into our glorious and wonderful country has always provoked debate and it always will. Now more than ever there are questions on our countries

immigration laws. With Bulgaria and Romania joining the EU in 1997 and as of January 1st 2014, they are free to come and live and work here. The idea itself was not welcomed with open arms, however; with stories of welfare abuse and criminality stirring up the nation’s emotions, it is no wonder that people are scared. But should they be?

Really?

The answer is no. Yes, there will be Romanians who claim benefits when they shouldn’t and yes there will be Romanians who pick pockets outside the tube station, but let’s be honest, us Brits aren’t much better. There are Britons who steal, fight and claim dole when they needn’t do. People in glass houses and all that, right?

We cannot tar the entirety of a nation with the same brush. That’s like saying all of us drink tea, watch Eastenders and get a hard-on over the royal family, quite frankly I don’t even like tea that much. The polls suggest that there are large numbers of people shitting it over the arrivals and not all of them are white British born and bred. Ironically, some of those who are now complaining about these immigrants coming over were once on the other side of the argument.

This appears to be the way things work: we are happy as we are until a new ‘breed’ start coming over and then we kick up a fuss, we then, over time, realise that they aren’t in fact ‘stealing all of our jobs and our women’ and continue on with our lives.

To be honest, have our women; most aren’t that great anyway, but that’s beside the

point. The politicians got it wrong about the number of Polish immigrants coming over the English Channel, and I mean they really got it wrong.

If you are a reader of the Daily Mail you will no-doubt be outraged at the thought of Polish people on benefits and causing crime and being bad people, but what we must remember is that they have in fact contributed more to the Treasury in taxes than they take out in benefits and services—about 35% more. I’m no mathematician but to me that seems like a good thing. I am not so naïve to think that our economy is about as attractive as an airbrushed supermodel – it isn’t– but not allowing Romanians or Bulgarians in isn’t going to somehow revive it.

The politicians got it wrong about the number of Polish immigrants It’s all too late now either way; the borders are already open and if they wish to they are on their way. Actuaally, if these people want to leave their families, their loved ones and their homes to come to this shitty island with an even shittier football team to wash cars for five pounds an hour in Stokeon-Trent then by all means come on in, and bring your mates too.

COMMENT

13

PENSION PALAVER PATRICK GREENFIELD @Greenfpa

T

he morbid orgy of political point scoring surrounding pensions, retirement and death is of little interest to students. Manufactured visions of elderly relatives cowering by a gas fire in depressing bungalows have made the subject pretty uncontroversial- “everyone deserves a decent pension blah, blah, blah.” Although dull, pensions are very important, not just as a form of welfare but as a symbol of intergenerational relations.

Britain’s workers are currently supporting the generation that rebuilt our nation after World War 2; it would be hard to find a more deserving group of benefit claimants.

Yes, they are benefit claimants, just like the ones we read about in the Daily Mail. We will all shortly begin contributing to the system through taxation until some point in the 2050s when we will retire and eventually die. But, will we be proud to support our parents’ age group? They are the generation responsible for making affordable housing an oxymoron, raising tuition fees to £9,000, and cutting the safety net of the welfare state for young people. What does our generation have to thank them for?

Pensions account for approximately half the welfare budget and most worryingly, incentivise early retirement David Cameron has recently committed to a “triple lock” system under which the state pension will rise by at least 2.5% every year if the Conservative Party wins the next general election. With pensioners more likely to vote than any other age group, it certainly makes political sense. While it’s all well and good for Dave to get generous with other people’s money, today’s youth will have to foot the bill. As the Institute of Economic Affairs recently pointed out, pension spending will increase 42% as a proportion of national income between 2012 and 2062 if the UK adopts this system. If we are going to complain about illegitimate benefit claimants, we should be worried about pensioners. I do not use the word illegitimate with malice, but it isn’t possible to justify a final salary pension scheme for non-manual labourers that is guaranteed by the state and paid for by a poor workforce anymore. Nor is it possible to justify a state pension in its current form.

Our current pension system is designed to cater for a post-war population that typically died a few years after retirement, not droves of sixty-somethings having it large in the south of Spain. But it’s not all doom and gloom. A compulsory private pension scheme would make us the last British generation with this flawed taxation system.

Pensions account for approximately half the welfare budget and most worryingly, incentivise early retirement. Rightly or wrongly, I’m not feeling particularly generous in the face of spiralling costs, an impossible job market and the prospect of buying my first property at 40.

14

SNAPTWAT

HELENA HORTON

@helenashead

I

YORK VISION

COMMENT

received my first penis snapchat the other day. Since then, I have been the recipient of many incriminating pictures that people would not want their future employers, or even the majority of their Facebook friends to see, from racist jokes to ‘saucy underboobs’ to pictures of my friends’ one night stands after they fell asleep.

Snapchat is totally unique in the regard that you can send something to someone and there will absolutely be no record of it (if you set the time limit to below four seconds). This can make conversing more funand it lets us indulge in our more narcissistic side, as if we need to with Instagram, Facebook and Twitter at our fingertips; but it also blurs the lines between what is appropriate for someone to see and what is not.

Until Christmas, I was the proud owner of a £10 Alcatel brick phone, feeling smug and superior because I was not shackled permanently to the internet like my fellow friends, who seemed constantly glued to their smartphones, taking self-indulgent ‘selfies’ to send each other and seeing who favourited the retweet of a retweet, of a retweet that they did on Twitter. I was an outsider to this whole micro-social media craze.

It seems like the rules are different in our little virtual realities to how they are in the real world. If someone whipped out their dick and showed me without me asking in real life I would probably be very shocked and feel a bit harassed - I could even report it to the police if I wanted. It seems like a very unlikely thing for someone to do. With Snapchat, this may not be a common practice, at least not for technophobes such as me, but it’s not unheard of and isn’t really frowned upon. The prevailing attitude when I incredulously told my friends was ‘congratulations!’ or the timeless ‘LOL’.

Perhaps this isn’t a bad thing (you can block people on Snapchat if they relentlessly send you saucy pictures when you are watching Mad Men with your mum or playing Articulate with your elderly family members) and it makes us more open with each other- it certainly makes sexting easier and less risky. I will always remember the poor girl at school who trusted the wrong immature 15 year old boy and had herself in a compromising position sent

by MMS from nokia to nokia all over the school.

However it does make me wonder about how social media erodes away boundaries.

With Tinder and Grindr you can arrange sex with strangers any time at the press of one button and you can guiltlessly send people pictures of your genitals in mere seconds - without this technology we probably would keep it in our pants a bit more.

Maybe it was always in our nature to be a bit saucy and these apps just enable our naughtier side to come out. Or maybe once you’ve sent your first tit pic, the buzz goes and you don’t feel like it’s a big deal anymore.

All that I know is that I won’t be sending any saucy snaps until my index finger starts behaving itself and stops accidentally sending my snapchats to my parents.

Oops.

Tuesday January 14, 2014

SHOULD STUDENTS ABSTAIN FROM ALCOHOL IN JANUARY?

MICHAEL COOPER

YES

@MichaelCooper09

W

e have so many different charity themed months now, Movember, Stoptober we’ve have heard it all! The newest in this wave of charity sponsored months of deprivation is ‘Dryathlon’ – the idea is that all those taking part give up alcohol for the whole of January and get sponsored for doing so. I think this is a brilliant idea, even for us students; if there is one body in society that needs to rein in the alcohol consumption, it is students.

Alcohol is such a part of student life that giving it up cannot be a bad thing. I for one know that the student lifestyle really takes it out of you – and I think a lot of that is done to the excesses of alcohol. The Dryathlon is, of course, for charity and raising awareness for cancer, and of course no one doubts the intrinsic value of that. But along with Stoptober, giving up a vice for a month also carries a lot of positives for the person partaking in it independent of the social outcomes that result for charity.

A group of journalists who did the Dryathlon found that as well as lowering body and crucially liver fat, it also helped increase their ability to concentrate. Surely as students we should consider the implications of living the teetotal lifestyle even if just for temporary

periods of time – restraint is a virtue that is not exercised enough by students – and I think that is a bad thing.

Now the last thing I want to be is a party pooper, and I do admit to having been through quite a few heavy nights myself, but this is by no means a statement about drinking in general.

I just believe on balance that temporary bouts of teetotal-ness cannot be a bad thing especially if they help raise awareness of cancer. January is also a very stressful month for students, getting back from the Christmas break and then suddenly thrown into a whirlwind of exams and essay deadlines. Why not stay off the booze for a while? Not only will this help you feel better after the worst excesses of Christmas but also you may do better in your exams as a result.

It may be hard for those that are so entrenched in the partying scene at university to stop drinking, but surely that makes it all the more important? Restraint is not a life skill that is applauded in this consumerist age but it is a skill that will certainly help us in later life – alcohol should not be used as a solution to all of life’s problems.

As for me I have not got off to a dry start this January but I will certainly consider doing it next year.

WILL MCCURDY

NO

@YorkVision

A

lcohol can be a hard thing to defend at times.

It seems to be a cause of every social ill that one may care to mention, from cancer to violent crime.

For thousands of years governments and religions all over the world have tried their hands at banning it, and the vast majority of them have failed miserably. Historically it’s a uniquely unbanishable substance. Despite its well known connection to health problems, its relatively high price and its waist widening potential, millions of people happily wreck their livers every weekend. Why? Because it’s great, that’s why. You don’t need to drink to have fun: but it definitely helps. Jay Gatsby didn’t get rich selling tap water.

Students these days have a hard and uncertain future ahead of them, graduating with unimaginable debts into an uncertain job. If alcohol makes us forget about our troubles then so be it.

Who can blame us? If downing tequila shots in a converted Chinese restaurant makes people forget about the mess we’re in, all the better.

Alcohol itself isn’t a problem. It’s excess reliance on it that screws people up. As cliché as it may be, the phrase “all things in moderation” is very true. People don’t need to give up cold turkey;

they just need to have some selfcontrol and not miss too many lectures in a hungover haze.

Raising money for charity is all well and good. But demonizing alcohol is unfair. It’s not alcohol that’s the problem, it’s a small minority of people with issues.

It’s a cute concept, I can’t deny that, but couldn’t people give up something a little less closer to home like chocolate or takeaways? Let’s be honest, alcohol is essentially a sacrament for students. For better or worse, it’s part of the fabric of university life.

When I walk into Willow on a Friday night I don’t see people falling into the claws of some great social evil. I see third years temporarily forgetting about the terror of their impeding graduations. I see people having the time of their lives dancing to Taylor Swift songs that only hours ago they would have been too cool for. I see ugly people getting laid. I see what essentially is a very beautiful thing. Yes, alcohol may kill you, it may make you fat, but on a long enough timescale that’s going to happen anyway and you might as well not remember exactly how it happened. I think Homer Simpson said it best: “To alcohol, the cause of and solution to, all of life’s problems.”

WAGING WAR ON GOVE

TOM DAVIES

WHY MICHAEL GOVE HAS ANGERED FIRST WORLD WAR HISTORIANS

@ tomdavies111

T

here’s a lot of vitriol about Michael Gove around. He really seems to get on people’s wick. I’m not entirely sure why; education is not really my area, although I’m informed my colleague Michael Cooper has his face pinned to a dartboard in his bedroom. But that may just be hearsay.

Gove appears to have had what my father would call a “funny five minutes” whilst writing an opinion piece for The Daily Mail.

In the article he goes on at some length about how the TV series Blackadder Goes Forth is some sort of communist plot and that there exists some sort of leftist conspiracy by historians to convince the world that the First World War wasn’t Germany’s fault and purport a myth of the war as “a misbegotten shambles – a series of catastrophic mistakes perpetrated by an out-of-touch elite.”

So what’s the point Michael? It seems you feel that people have been focusing too much on all of the senseless, bloody slaughter and the horror of the trenches and not

enough on how we gave the Hun a jolly good spanking.

I appreciate that this sort of “our brave boys” patriotic tub thumping chimes well with Mr. Gove’s intended audience for this article in, well, the Mail, as does his laying of the blame for the perceived decline in the flag waving “my country ‘tis of thee” little Englandism. But it all smacks of rather lazy political posturing which infers that anyone who’s ever laughed at Blackadder lacks the proper respect for the war dead.

If Gove really wanted to honour the spirit of the British soldiers who died in the conflict, he would let them rest.

In his view it seems that if you take a vaguely critical view of say, Field Marshal Haig’s handling of the Battle of the Somme, in which 20,000 British troops were killed on the first day alone, which I’m assuming is considered a balls up by anyone’s standards, then you’re a raving socialist. I am not a so-

cialist, but it’s fair to say that on balance, I think the British officer class could have handled things a little better.

It’s bizarre how the partial raison d’etre for Gove’s article was his backing of Maria Millar’s proposal that the centenary celebrations of the “Great” War should lack overt jingoism, when his article seems to be furthering exactly that. Gove has put himself in the middle of a debate where on one side is a broad historical consensus and the other those blokes who shout things like “two World Wars and one World Cup” at German tourists in the Algarve, and thrown his weight firmly behind the latter camp.

I, like Michael Gove, am not a historian.

But surely the reason why WW2 is so much more frequently celebrated as a cause for British patriotism is that our involvement was morally so much clearer cut than the First. WW2 was a war of ideology against a foe that was genuinely contemptible. An expansionist, fascist foe who threatened us, our values and all we held dear. WW1 was a war started when a Bosnian shot a Serb and resulted in a domino effect of centuries old dynastic alliances coming to a very dramatic head. So it’s a lot harder to bash the bosch.

Ultimately, if Gove really wanted to honour the spirit of the British soldiers who died in the conflict, he’d let them rest.

15

FEATURES

YORK VISION Tuesday January 14, 2014

FEATURES Vision’s Guide to housing

www.yorkvision.co.uk/features features@yorkvision.co.uk

January is the month for York’s students to begrudgingly decide who their real friends are and commit to living together for at least another 12 months. To take a little bit of the stress out of the decision, we’ve compiled a guide to York’s most notorious student areas to help you pick your new neighbourhood.

Monkgate

Osbaldwick

Fulford

Monkgate may be dangerously close to York St Johns, but it’s in a great location due to its close proximity to the city centre, and it’s still no more than a half an hour’s walk from the main campus. Additionally, archaeologists rejoice! Monkgate is a ten minute walk from The King’s Manor, making it ideal if you have all your lectures there.

Moreover the library at Kings Manor is jolly nice to work in, even for those who don’t have lectures there, and I often end up working there when I know the main library will be heaving, which it often is. Other great advantages to living on Monkgate include being about thirty seconds away from Sainsbury’s and less than five minutes from Morrisons as well. As Monkgate backs onto Goodramgate, it’s also close to a few pubs and cafes and a late night Tesco (handy for late night snacking). The only real downside is that it can be quite expensive with some students paying £80 a week, which may be a little too much for some people’s budgets. Jack Western

Osbaldwick is a remote colony of the City of York located “somewhere beyond Badger Hill” off the far end of Hull Road, which no one, not even Hull Road residents, seem to be aware exists. Amenities and general resources are scarce in Osbaldwick, which has led to the development of a hardy, frontier society. Principle activities include firing revolvers at the sky and playing five card stud in The Magnet. Much of what you would think of as civilization in Osbaldwick is based around one of two main epicentres.

The first, in the Osbaldwick Leyes, primarily consists of a Sainsbury’s Local, the outside of which is the permanent residence of the ‘Baldwick Boys, the area’s most feared gang of 10-12 year olds who are wanted for such crimes as leaning on their BMX’s wearing polyester trousers to try to look menacing. The other is the area immediately surrounding the village green, which includes the Derwent Arms pub, the used car dealership and has basically been wrenched directly from Heartbeat. Tom Davies

Fulford is an expansive area that runs along the river bank closest to the University and stretches from Mecca Bingo in the north down towards Halifax in the south. Its advantages are proximity to town- it takes barely 10 minutes to get in to the centre of the city, which is really handy as it means you never have to get taxis or buses. The distance from campus is a bit of a myth as there are about three routes you can take to get to Fulford from the University, which means wherever you are it’ll take you 20 minutes to get onto the centre of Heslington West (obviously for Hes East you’re going to take considerably longer, but if you study there, why on earth would you consider living in Fulford?). An added security bonus is that Fulford is one of the most residential areas in York so crime rates are low, and although that rules out raging house parties it also makes theft and break-ins much less likely. For wildlife lovers, it’s also by the river so you’re never too far from your water fowl friends. Angus Quinn

Heslington

Badger Hill

Tang Hall

Heslington village has some of the nicest and largest accommodation in York, with abundant leafy country cottages, converted farmhouses and one or two huge properties ideal for people with large groups of friends. Living in Heslington puts you about as close to the university as you can be without actually living on campus, so your days of waking up need not be over yet! Living here gives you a true Yorkshire village experience, complete with rural pub, and everyone’s favourite sandwich shop is in close proximity. However, you’re even further away from the city centre than you were when you lived on campus, making trips into town difficult and time consuming. It’s also very quiet, so if you’re the sort of person who likes a 24 hour party right on your doorstep, sadly it’s not the place for you. Accommodation here is pricey; you’re looking at £120 a week for your everyday, run of the mill palatial mansion.

If you can afford it however, and want a true taste of Yorkshire, it’s a great place to live. Callum Shannon

Apparently Badger Hill has only recently become a student area. This may explain why last year someone took the time to print notes and put them on every windscreen to tell them (incorrectly) that it was prohibited to park there.

But our rents are cheap, and the houses are nice. Badger Hill has a small shop, 2 hairdressers and that all important fish tackle shop, servicing your every need for… fish tackle? Badger Hill’s greatest asset is undoubtedly the bakery.

For £1.20 you can have a bacon and sausage sandwich with ketchup. Although experiences vary, I’ve found people incredibly friendly here. Someone two doors down delivers us her excess fruit from her apple and pear trees, helping save us from scurvy. All in all, Badger Hill is a very safe, very sedate area. Once the front door of our house was left wide open for over 10 hours with no one in. Nothing was taken. I think that says it all. Just a note, we thoroughly lock all the doors now, just to let any prospective burglars know. Elle Panes

When you live in Tang Hall, your friends will always ask, “Why?” and offer their loving support. In fact, it wouldn’t be surprising if there were a support group for students living there. It’s a place that generates a new stereotype on a daily basis: looting every weekend without fail, drunk bicycled youths dressed head to toe in Paul’s Boutique roam the streets unsupervised, not to mention it’s reportedly between one and four hours from campus. In reality, it is a very residential area and, therefore, has a lot of children wandering around (often wearing Paul’s Boutique in front of the local Co-op). But they’re harmless, and Tang Hall is in no way deprived enough to spawn any classic hip-hop albums in its honour. It’s about a 25-minute walk from campus, which might put some off looking there, but it also means rent is much cheaper. There are quite a lot of surprisingly nice houses scattered around for reasonable prices, if you can sift through a list of what are effectively cardboard boxes. Karl Tomusk

17

YORK VISION

FEATURES

Tuesday January 14th, 2014

Willowing in Self-Pity?

KARL TOMUSK spends all night in York’s most infamous disco, completely sober. Here’s how he got on...

Willow has a certain reputation. For whatever reason, students are invariably told that Willow has to be experienced in the same state Charlie Sheen experiences life. Anything less than total mental catatonia is unacceptable, and anyone who has witnessed it with sober eyes will never be whole again.

Undoubtedly if it were run in Old Testament times, it would have been the focal point of divine judgment in lieu of Sodom and Gomorrah. Lot’s wife would have been turned to a pillar of salt, yearning for the smell of tequila rather than the debauched city that was her home.

Now, many of us have been there sober but it’s safe to assume no sober student has voluntary stayed there alone from the moment it opens at 11pm to when the lights come on at 4.30, drinking nothing but water and never once leaving. As it happens, witnessing an entire night in Willow without £1 shots was far less dramatic and far more entertaining than its penchant for hyperbole would suggest.

The first to arrive was, unsurprisingly, a small group of very drunk students who had to promise Tommy they wouldn’t drink anymore and then proceeded to empty their wallets at the bar. They were confused by the emptiness, most likely having forgotten they were standing alone by a locked door less than five minutes before.

Willow-goers respond to the foam machine by instinct Most others who staggered in that first hour came and went immediately, but those who stayed for longer soon discovered that an empty room lends itself perfectly to interpretive dance. You haven’t lived until you’ve seen the potential that space creates in Willow. One man will stand in the middle, on his own, with no shame, and express his innermost desire to have the world watch him.

Maybe his passion for dance was neglected as a child. Maybe he was kicked out of ballet class. Maybe he was drunk. Unfortunately, only five other people will see him, and none of them will remember.

Upstairs, people sit, talk, or chomp on each other’s lips from the very beginning.

Two graduates there, Lee and Joanna, recounted their memories of York’s nightlife.

According to Joanna, Willow is perpetually inhabited by “virgins and secret geeks,” has a DJ who does nothing but press play all

Vision’s Fantasy TV Shows ANGUS QUINN talks about the TV shows he’d like YSTV to make...

HES-EASTENDERS

night, and is generally the preserve of people who should be at home alone, crying into their pillows. The drunken bitterness was palpable. Nevertheless, going to Willow that night was her idea, Lee added, thus revealing the struggle within every student’s mind: How do I enjoy Willow while pretending that everyone else there is a lonely floozy and I’m the exception?

Her self-contradictory opinion of Willow aside, Joanna’s criticism of the music is not unfounded. Everyone knows you go there for awful songs that everyone can shamelessly enjoy as a group, nostalgically, drunkenly, perhaps “ironically” if you have too much pride to admit you really do have a soft spot for Ke$ha and know all the lyrics to Taylor Swift’s ‘I Knew You Were Trouble’ (but only when you’re drunk, you assure your friends, fearing their judgment). There are rumours about how many times the DJ gets away with replaying songs, hoping no one notices. As with everything else, these rumours are also sensationalized. ‘Year 3000’, for example, was played only once that Thursday night, 18 minutes after it opened. Meanwhile, Willow was subjected to Shakira’s ‘Hips Don’t Lie’ three times. Not even ‘Best Song Ever’

by One Direction was played that much (although the DJ decided playing the Rolling Stones’ ‘Brown Sugar’ right after it would be a sonic thrill – make of that what you will).

Willow is full of such details you wouldn’t notice drunk. Sober, the atmosphere is almost no different, but you become aware of how loud everything is. Sure, on a normal night you can’t hear anything from the person you’re chatting up like the suave model of excellence you believe you are, but everything is ultimately background noise. On top of the music, there is the all-powerful foam machine that acts as both an applause sign and a holiday-neutral mistletoe. Like Pavlov’s dog before them, frequent Willow-goers respond to the machine by instinct, their hands and mouths seeking out a potential mate at a flick of the DJ’s wrist.

This obviously happens downstairs, but you would be surprised by how much of an aphrodisiac the stairs are. Something about the smell of sweat and tequila with the subconscious knowledge that Tommy is only metres away must trigger a steady ooze of pheromones considering the number of successful chat up lines used there in the first few hours alone.

The thing about Willow is that there will always be people there you know. If you ever do end up there alone and sober, just wait until a few friends show up and join them. Once the realization hits that all your friends are plastered and could not care less about your dancing, getting into the spirit of the occa-

Photo: Jack Western sion takes no effort. It might be something in the air or just mass hysteria, but the moment you wander in, you will immediately know all the lyrics to ‘Gold Digger’ all over again.

In fact, that same lack of inhibition means that judging people in Willow tends to happen before and after, not so much on the night. While you’re there, everyone’s a potential friend. On this particular occasion, during Robbie Williams’ ‘Candy’ an impromptu conga line broke out that eventually included all but maybe ten people in Willow while it was almost at full capacity. It was a beautiful display of harmony not unlike an Olympic opening ceremony.

The one exception to Willow’s collective tolerance is the presence of BNOCs, particularly YUSU representatives. Their every move is scrutinized, as one student discovered. He sat down at a table with someone and within seconds a crowd formed next to him, discussing every detail of their rendezvous, which, by Willow standards, was as sexually-charged as a brick wall. The crowd was, appropriately, three or four times as loud as they must have thought they were, which would have been embarrassing had anyone else been sober enough to pay attention.

Sober, the atmosphere is almost no different, but you become aware of how loud everything is...

But you learn to forgive all that because people are so friendly after 2 or 3 am that you can strike up a conversation with anyone and become best friends for a few minutes. Of course, the depth and propriety of the conversation varies wildly from person to person. One will tell you about their lives, dreams in detail and another will rant at you that all the “wrong girls” are drunk tonight.

It’s a rollercoaster of gaining and losing faith in humanity within seconds of each other.

In some ways, Willow is an uncensored look into the human psyche, and what you find is heartwarming, morally ambiguous, and confusing. At least most people are friendly.

As the last songs come on and everyone forms a circle to sing together, you realize that Willow is what you make of it, whether you choose to enjoy it or spend the whole night preoccupied with thinking you’re not drunk enough. After all, everything about Willow is exaggerated. It’s neither the sordid armpit of the world nor a wardrobe that leads to drunken Narnia. After stripping away all the rumours, when you’re in Willow, it’s nothing more than a place where students drink and find entertainment in everything.

A soap opera following the eventful lives of the inhabitants of Phillip Brockbank Court in Langwith College, in the first episode the Phillip Brockbank residents are shocked and perturbed when they discover somebody other than them in the Glasshouse, and a ruckus breaks out after someone takes a phone call outside one of the blocks at 8pm, waking up half the college.

YO10 5DD There’s new drama, but it’s the same infamous postcode of original 1990s series Heslington: YO10 5DD. Join southerners out of water Beth and Tommy as they travel to the frozen tundra of the north and have to get to grips with the language barrier and multitude of medieval attractions on offer. There’s unforgettable drama ahead with a stolen essay, late post, an unfortunate accident while trying to feed ducks and the explosive ghost tour around the city in the series finale. North Yorkshire has never been more dramatic!

LBR: JB MORELL It’s a hard life as part of Library Book Recovery, but Commander James Iron does his damned hardest to bring late book returners to justice and see that their fees are paid. With dozens of books lost daily in the library, it’s up to Iron and his team to track them down and return them within 3 hours or fail the library’s stringent recovery record.

YORK’S REAL HUSTLE Student advice show following the York Real Hustle team as they teach you the real life trick’s behind being an undergraduate at British University including; how to get away with not paying for a TV license and the secret of successfully smuggling a hip flask full of co-op own brand vodka into Willow.

18 FEATURES

YORK VISION

Interview: Grant Shapps

Tuesday January 14, 2014

Jack Gevertz talks exclusively to Grant Shapps MP, Chairman of the Conservative Party

I

f you want a face for the future, a man who will be running next year’s Conservative Party General Election campaign and quite possibly vying to succeed David Cameron as leader of the Tories, then this is your man.

Meet Grant Shapps. He’s not your average politician. He never went to private school. He never went to Oxford. In fact, he never even studied PPE. But what Mr. Shapps did do was set up his own business – which is something rare of MPs these days –following his studies at Manchester Polytechnic (now Manchester Metropolitan University). He entered Parliament at the 2005 General Election for Welwyn Hatfield after suffering 2 previous defeats at the 1997 and 2001 elections.

When the 45-year-old met up with me at his constituency office in Hertfordshire, dressed quite casually in a shirt and jeans, there appeared to be quite a buzz in the air. He had just finished an important feature for the Daily Express about hats being donated to the soldiers fighting in Afghanistan, and was subsequently, preparing for his surgery day work.

Grant appears to be well-respected around these parts. In 2010, he managed to increase his parliamentary majority from 1,000 to 17,000, making him one of the

his view on a Twitter storm last November, caused by the University’s very own Lemon Press Editor Sophie Gadd who said that David Cameron looked like Catherine the Great “in drag” after she spotted a portrait of the former Russian ruler at a German museum. Grant didn’t know what the Prime Minister thought of this, but commented: “I think that he probably thinks it’s quite amusing, quite funny, he’s usually got quite a good sense of humour, so he would think it’s quite funny, I think.”

If you don’t know much about a political party chairman’s portfolio, the main idea is to basically run the party machine and be the biggest cheerleader. The position also secures a place in the cabinet, and Grant was given the status of Minister without Portfolio.

So with all that in mind, and with the interview taking place following the publication of promising employment figures, he was certainly keen to talk about whether the government’s economic plans would poise the Conservative Party for electoral success in 18 months time.

“Well I think we certainly need to prove, and now it’s certainly very clear that we were right to make the difficult decisions that have turned this economy around, and it’s been very difficult. People

Why is cost of living such a factor? I’ll tell you why: we had the biggest recession in 100 years... safest Tories in the country. With safety comes promotion, and so Mr. Shapps was catapulted from minister of state for housing and local government into one of the Conservatives’ top jobs – the Chairman. So I wanted to ask the Conservative Party Chairman what his party’s aims were for 2015, what his views were on controversial cuts to the National Scholarship Programme and just what exactly future plans were for tuition fees given some vicechancellors from Britain’s leading institutions have said a rise to £20,000 is possible.

But the first thing I asked the Conservative chairman was for

have made very big sacrifices, and I think people in 2015 will have to say, do I want to risk throwing this all away?”

“We now have the benefit of this economy with more jobs, over 30 million people employed, the economy growing faster than the others in the G7. The biggest risk to all of that is Labour. Because they’d just come in, they’d borrow, they’d spend and they’d tax more. Exactly what got us into this mess.”

Of course, Labour’s key opposition to the Conservatives’ economic plans is that they are “cutting too far, too fast”, but that appears to have floundered since

Conservative Party Chairman Grant Shapps growth was restored. Where Labour’s economic message does resonate with voters is on cost of living. Grant attacked Labour leader Ed Miliband for being “incredibly disingenuous” on the cost of living crisis, and labelled the leader of the opposition’s message to the Conservatives as “outrageous”. He warned voters not to let Labour crash the economy again.

“I think it’s incredibly disingenuous of Ed Miliband. Why is cost of living such a factor? I’ll tell you why: we had the biggest recession in 100 years under the government that he was part of.

Over 7 per cent of the economy was wiped out by his government or by the recession that came under his government, which they couldn’t respond to because they’d already spent all the money. So for him, that’s why people’s cost of living has been so squeezed.

“It’s not like cost of living is here and the economy is over there, and it’s pretty outrageous for him to say the reason the cost of living is so tight is because we’ve been rescuing the economy.

No, the cost of living is so tight because he crashed the economy, and in 2015, we’ll be saying to people whatever we do let’s not give the car keys back to the people who crashed the economy in the first place.”

Unfortunately for Grant, recent polling shows we probably will, in his words, be giving the “car keys” back to the people who crashed the economy in the first place. Their pay packets look set for a healthy 11 per cent boost in 2015, too, along with the rest of the Commons. Shapps argued that the planned rise in MPs’ pay, justified by the Independent Parliamentary Standards Authority (IPSA), wasn’t justified. He further told me that he personally wouldn’t

accept the rise.

“Well, first of all, it’s not the MPs who have decided. IPSA was set up to make sure that MPs had no involvement in this whole voting on their own salaries, which most people support. Now IPSA have come out and said this, MPs still get the blame. What are we to do: scrap IPSA, vote them out and people will say MPs are trying to scrap the body that stops them from setting their own salaries.

“I think it is a problem; I don’t support the 11% suggestion.

Given that everyone else in the public service is limited to nothing or one per cent, MPs should be no different. I wouldn’t accept it whilst everyone else is getting one per cent. One thing that’s been lost in the argument is that in 2015 they’ll have to be another consultation beforehand so it’s a long way down the line yet.”

About a decade before Grant entered the Commons he studied for a Higher National Diploma in

speaking, quite a lot better off over your lifetime whereas we used to have a situation where the few elite went to university and poorer people went to work and paid their taxes to pay for people to go to university and get better paid jobs. So I think it is actually a fairer balance and even those people who campaigned against what I think is realistic solutions to funding universities have now been proven wrong.”

He also ruled out any moves to increase tuition fees before the next general election, commenting: “Right now they are capped, so obviously they can’t. Future governments will have to make decisions about that sort of thing but right now they can’t rise.”

Although Grant appears to be respected among his constituents, he appears less favoured by some of the British press. In 2012, The Guardian claimed that he may be using a secret algorithm to try and boost his Twitter fol-

The biggest risk to the economy is Labour business and finance. He left university with a lot less debt than those today. Last month the Government announced it would be cutting the funding available to poorer students who claim via the National Scholarship Programme to help them study at university.

Shapps denied that this, alongside the £9,000 tuition fees, would put any students off attending University. “I don’t think so. All the evidence has been the other way.

The number of people going to university hasn’t fallen against all the predictions, and we’ve got better funded universities as a result. I think it’s always worth remembering that if you go to university, you end up, generally

lowers.

“Only I have access to my Twitter account. I don’t let any staff on it or anything else. I do follow lots of people on Twitter.

I have over 73,000 followers, and I follow about 21,000. And by the way, look at the journalists who make this criticism and see what their balance of followers is, and you’ll find that they are actually following more than are following them. I think it’s polite to follow people back when they follow you for one.” Despite this controversy there seems little doubt that Shapps is one of UK politics rising stars and we are guaranteed to be seeing much more of him in the coming years.

YORK VISION

LIFESTYLE//JANUARYFASHIONICON

Tuesday January 14, 2014

19

Page 19- January Fashion Icon Page 20 -New Year, New Resolutions Page 21 - What We’ve Been Eating Page 22- Blind Date & Tom Davies’ Diary Page 23-My Week on the Butterfield Diet Plan

JANUARY FASHION ICON: Sam Faiers is the level-headed, fun-loving fashionista who is set to be the firm favourite of Celebrity Big Brother 2014 amidst love triangles, game plans and Big Brother’s evil designs. To top it all off, she’s been looking fab without makeup (or at least without those trademark eyelashes). - a TV personality to proud of. At 23, she runs her own shop, Minnie’s Boutique, with her sister Billie.

The Minnie’s website boasts stacks of affordable fashion gems from dresses to loungewear. This year, sisters Sam and Billie are set to be our Essex-style inspirations. We love her classy teal dress and snakeskin heels worn on a recent night out before she entered the BB house.

Skimp on the boob jobs and steal her style...

SAM

FAIERS

Booking Easter treats?

We say ...

HOT! Whether it’s nabbing one of the last spots on the YUSNOW ski trip or browsing for a budget getaway online we’re already dreaming of our next fix of sunshine and adventure

Secrets of the Living DoLLs:

WHAT?!

Latex ‘femskins’ and extreme drag, the new fetish to be investigated on a television near you

Crocs get a high fashion makeover, or.....

NOT! In a radical departure from the perforated perspex of old, Crocs are reinventing their original products in ‘conemporary’ and ‘artistic’ ways.

There are currently 300 styles available across the globe. A few hundred too many perhaps?

Sam wears own high neck teal dress from Zara

Python Print Midi Dress £32 by Rare at www. topshop.com

Teal green heels £15, Dorothy Perkins

Rimmel Salon Pro in Celebrity Bash 391 by Kate Moss £4.49, Superdrug

Stud trim cream bag £25, www.boohoo.com

Maddi Howell

20LIFESTYLE//NEW YEAR

YORK VISION

Tuesday January 14 2014

NEW YEAR

NEW YOU My New Years’ Resolution

T

here is absolutely nothing more depressing than sitting in the blistering cold with so many layers of clothing on it makes the Michelin man look like he’s been on a detox, whilst waiting for a train at seven am on new years day.

The only people who are up at this time are staff who are about to jump in front of the next train passing through the station and the won’t-let-the-party-end-ers, and in all honesty I do not wish to see either of them.

I finished work at three am in a nightclub, which was an interesting experience to say the least. Being sober, or close to it whilst serving the drunken public drinks on new years even on the last day of the year is entertaining in a David Attenborough style way. After last minute post work packing and a few hours sleep here I was waiting for the train back to York.

It’s new years day, I’m sat here in sub-zero conditions, and I got thinking about my resolutions from last year and years before.

‘Give up smoking’, ‘stop drinking so much’ ‘get a six pack’ ‘get a girlfriend’ were genuinely on my list from the past few years. Needless to say I have failed at all of them but most people do right? Does anybody actually complete a year with his or her new years resolution completed? Really? I know you’re lying.

On the train I fell asleep but not before long I woke up at the next station whereby a group of young lads entered. I’m no Sherlock Holmes but what with the cans of beer in their hands and football paraphernalia I gathered they were going to some sort of football match.

My first thought was of despair, they would be rowdy, noisy, rude, and offensive and would keep me

from my much-needed sleep. They started drinking as soon as they entered the train and combined it with chants and singing.

I was however, wrong to jump to the conclusion I did, and it was a mere stereotype and prejudice that cause me to arrive at it. The train became busier and soon there were no spare seats, and when an elderly man came on the train, what did one of these ‘yobs’ do? Only gave up his fucking seat for the man.

That’s right, one of the youths who I thought would cause a nuisance and disturb the train journey for all turned out to be, well a pretty nice chap after all. Who would have thought it?

So I returned to my semi-sleep stupor and I decided on my new years resolution. To give people the time of day, or to be more accurate, to not pre-judge what people are going to be like. The old saying holds true ‘do not judge a book by its cover’. I for one know what it is like as people often make opinions on me having never met or even spoken to me. It’s a grim, cold, bleak, depressing, tough world out there right now, but there are moments of humility that will warm your heart.

So whilst getting in shape, losing those 8 pounds, stopping smoking, ringing your mother more might be lovely in theory be honest to yourself how long will they all last? They all take time, effort and self-discipline so maybe this year choose something that doesn’t cost you £45 because you totally cannot go to the gym without new gym clothes, and embrace strangers.

Give people a chance, and do not make opinions or judgments until you have met and spoken to them Chances are whilst they may look scary and horrible, they are just as lovely as you.

It’s the second term of the year and we’ve all been throwing up and crying in the library (unless we are freshers...) as the year’s workload hits us and we regret the revelry of the first term, and it’s the start of a new calendar year. Our seasoned York veterans are on hand as Tom A-C talks candidly about New Year’s Resolutions and Callum Shannon gives us all a guide on how to get through the thrills, spills, homesickness and crippling work of the second term.

Surviving the Second Term Tip 1: Get your exams and assignments out of the way…then forget about them!

Unless you’re really unlucky and have exams in week two, this one should be pretty easy to manage, as your assessed work will be out of the way in no time at all. And once it is, forget about them! There really is nothing you can do once you’ve sat the exams so you may as well be enjoying yourself rather than fretting about grades.

Tip 2: Keep in touch with home.

Studies show, counterintuitive as it may sound, the average student gets more homesick in their second term than their first. Luckily, homesickness is easily remediable. Speaking to family and friends on a regular basis, no matter how you do it, can really help.

Tip 3: Make an effort to maintain the friendships you made in the first term.

In the second term, it’s important not to let your friendships slip. The best way to keep your mates close is simply to keep in touch with them, which should be pretty easy as you’re likely living or studying with them, meaning you’ll see each other without much effort. Keep attending societies you joined in the first term too to keep your friendship groups diverse and interesting and your social life full.

Tip 4: Take your time with housing.

Sorting out housing is stressful. Your plans may be different to other people and the logistics of house sharing means that occasionally, somebody can get left out.

It’s also tempting to simply accept the first offer of a house you receive but I’d advise you to give who you want to live with next year a careful think, after all you’re going to have to cooperate with your new housemates very well, especially if you get a joint tenancy agreement and you’re all technically responsible if one person misses their rent or breaks something. By no means leave sorting your house out until the last minute, but rushing into something so important is a very bad idea.

Above all, remember your downtime. Uni can be hectic with exams, societies and massive bants in Willow. A bit of rest and refection go a long way.

Do you have an eye for fashion? Are you crazy about culture? Fanatical about food? Get involved with our Lifestyle section! Email lifestyle@yorkvision.co.uk to find out how!

LIFESTYLE//FOOD

YORK VISION

Tuesday January 14 2014

21

WHAT WE’VE BEEN E ATING REVIEW: Cabra Verde

Quinn’s Kitchen

Although it’s a bit off the beaten track, Jim Dee thinks the quality of the food makes this Spanish restaurant worth the trip

A

ny Spanish restaurant can be reasonably well judged on its sherry and its pork dishes.

Cabra verde excels in both, and is definitely worth a visit. While Ambiente offers a rustic, rough around the edges selection, Cabra Verde is more refined in its plating and delivers cleaner, punchier flavours.

Both restaurants are excellent, but as I’m a lover of pork in all its glorious forms Cabra Verde has become the favourite.

The menu is fairly varied and has a good selection of vegan, vegetarian and meat dishes, as well as few clever fish courses.

Between the four of us we pick a table

covering selection of small plates, and for drinks we try the sherry. Both were excellent, but between the Fino and the Amontillado I preferred the fuller flavour of the latter.

The depth of flavour accomplished at Cabra Verde is something which many of York’s other restaurants should aspire to.

Olives and almonds are salty and sweet respectively, and paired well with the sherry. Amongst other dishes, we chose goat stew, spiced belly pork, grilled chorizo, scallops and a chickpea stew.

The spiced belly was rich and fatty, and served with thick sherry vinegar which interplayed nicely with the fattiness. The scallops were wrapped in serrano ham and served with potato puree.

They were perfectly cooked and benefited from the salty punch of the ham.

The depth of flavour accomplished at Cabra Verde is something which many of York’s other restaurants should aspire

RECIPE CORNER Jim’s Spag Bol with a twist...

S

paghetti Bolognese makes absolutely no sense whatsoever and is an insult to good Italian cooking. The Italian way of cooking is very approachable to people with limited experience, as it relies on simple techniques and simple combinations of flavour.

The biggest problem with spaghetti Bolognese is that spaghetti and Bolognese just don’t work together. The pasta is too thin to hold any of the sauce, and people would be much better off with tagliatelle or pappardelle, or at a push penne. Next is the mince most people used to make it, which is both tasteless and expensive. For less money you could use pieces of ox cheek, oxtail or diced beef, which (especially in the case of the first two) have far better flavour and texture. The sauce isn’t supposed to be ready in 20 minutes; it requires long and gentle simmering as well as an aromatic base of onion, carrot and celery, good browning on the meat and a dash of acidity from white wine.

Ingredients: 2 whole ox cheeks, 2 onions, 2 carrots, 2 sticks of celery, garlic, 2 tins of good quality chopped tomatoes, good quality tomato puree, a splash of white wine.

Chop the vegetables into 1cm pieces, sweat the onions and carrots, then add the garlic and celery and cook for a further minute. Dice the ox cheeks into 1 inch chunks, then brown in a separate pan before adding to the vegetables. Add a tablespoon of the tomato puree and cook gently for 4-5 minutes, then add the white wine. Once the alcohol has burnt off add the chopped tomatoes and simmer the sauce on the lowest heat possible for 3+ hours. Shred the meat and serve with tagliatelle which has been boiled in lots of salted water.

The food team loves

J

anuary is the month when the dark, cold and icy fist of winter seizes York by the jugular and we all cry about the fact we can only have the heating on for a few precious hours a day.

Consequently, for me at least, January is about hearty and warming food. A light salad will do bugger all to toughen your constitution to brave snow, ice and even less appetising- slush.

The humble pasta bake is literally a godsend. It’s cheap, it’s warming and it feeds you for days upon days, largely because one spoonful, if you make a pasta bake right, will cripple your digestive system and leave you pleasantly bloated immediately after a sitting.

It’ll be so excruciating for your body to burn off, you’ll be pleasantly warmed all evening and you can also look a bit cultured because you haven’t just made a bog standard casserole.

Perpetually popular penne is a good base pasta and then I like to make a bolognese sauce to go in it, purely because meat’s more interesting than just tomato sauce but if you’re stuck for mince you can just keep it simple and crack in a tin of chopped tomatoes.

Then add a liberal amount of cheese and bung it in the oven – simple supper, you can even splash out on garlic bread if you like for an even carbier and satisfying winter supper.

You should always have baked goods about in January though, they provide a satisfying kick that fruits really won’t until the spring and if you’re prudent about what goes into them, they aren’t as wasteful as all chocolate desserts.

A favourite of mine is porridge oat based cookies. You can still add the chocolate chips for some added sweetness, but the oats mean you get slow release energy from them and they aren’t as bad for you as that bag of Millie’s Cookies you just eyed up in Costcutter as they’re on special offer (yes you there, the special offer is a con and it’s cheaper to get one packet, or better yet go to Yourshop, Costcutter is the most ironically named shop ever).

Ultimately though, cooking with friends is fun and it’ll add a special dimension to that reunion film night that we all have in the dark depths of winter, when only the glimmering highlight of a Disney film can pull us out of the essay and reading induced energy nosedive we all suffer from.

Easy as it is to buy a frozen pizza, they never cook properly and you always feel disgusting after eating one. Knocking up pizza dough is easy because it’s basically flour, olive oil and waiting, and since we’re students you can leave the dough to rise in advance (assuming you can find somewhere warm for it…).

If a group of you club together for about a tenner you can get more ingredients than you’d get for double that at a takeaway.

Then make your own pizza and cook away, it’ll taste better than Dominos and since you’ll have worked to make it you know it isn’t splattered in whatever masquerades as cheese on their pizzas.

to, and the only fault I could find with the meal was the lack of textual variation, although this was largely down to the dishes we chose.

For desserts we tried the chocolate torte and the crème Catalana. Similar to a crème brûlée but with hints of spice, the Catalana was the lighter option of the two, but nonetheless satisfyingly rich.

The chocolate torte was a combination of 72% chocolate and almonds, and therefore a heavy but tasty way to finish the meal. The Pedro Ximinez dessert sherry was the best way to finish- raisiny and a very long finish.

Next time I’ll be trying their Morcilla and (as an aficionado of slow and sticky braises) the pig’s cheeks.

Cabra Verde is a little tricky to find for the first time customer, as it’s tucked away in a skinny side street by the perfume shop.

Once you been and realised how good pork can get it’ll become a dependable favourite.

Dishes range from 4-6 pounds a plate and most people will want 2 or 3 each, although for larger groups you might average a little under that.

All in all, it was a fantastic experience and I’d recommend a visit to all.

Cabra Verde is found at Number 1 Peter Lane. Contact the restaurant on 01904 652 920

Good news for lovers of melted things Retro Fondue has opened in Goodramgate! Go there for delicious chocolate or cheese fondues.

Apparently ice cream sandwiches are set to be the new cupcake in 2014, to which we can only say ‘phew’ because cupcakes are just overpriced, tiny, shit cakes.

Il Paradiso- we got pizzas as big as our faces and a glass of wine each for £7.50.

What’s not to love?!

is a goddess sent from high above and we love her. That is all that needs to be said on the matter.

22 LIFESTYLE//BLIND DATE @TomDavies111

Davies’ Diaries

I

t’s over then, it’s done. The Festive season has come to an end for another year. That bird has well and truly flown, which is a daft bloody thing for it to do where I’m from because someone is liable to shoot at it.

The January essay deadlines have, for most of us, come and gone and I have successfully (although I’m not 100% sure if that’s the right word) completed my Political Enquiry examination, because the truly inspired genius behind that module decided to reverse the traditional essays in January, exams in May dichotomy that has always served the Department of Politics so well; presumably as an intentional attempt to slip us up.

Regardless, my essays and exams have left me with little of note to share with you this edition, having temporarily cancelled my social life and taken up the vast majority of my thoughts.

So with that, the rest of this little diatribe should take on a decidedly library based theme.

During my almost two week long internment in Harry Fairhurst I was reminded of a number of things. Chief amongst these being that Harry Fairhurst is a preposterous art deco adventure playground where normal societal rules don’t apply. Over the course of this essay deadline period I have witnessed a man brushing his teeth in the ground floor toilets and an individual wandering around the library wearing six different scarves at once. As Gary Jules once so wisely opined, it’s a very, very mad world and it’s particularly condensed in the Harry Fairhurst building. Completing a library exam period is a lot like doing a tour in ‘nam.

You see some things you never want to have to relive and it’s really, really bloody hot.

Finally, those of you who spent most of last year’s January exam period endlessly bitching about smokers outside of the Library main entrance where they could be controversially both seen and heard will be glad to know that we ‘baccy stained untermensch have now been banished forthwith to the other end of the Library bridge, having now been herded even from the benches to the side of the doors by the library greyshirts. Of course we can’t be allowed to sit down, sitting down is for the clean lunged, who in a cruel irony are fit enough to not have to do so. Apparently this is the thanks we get after the British government has spent four years seeing if it can raise the tobacco duties to a point whereby we will single handedly smoke the country out of recession.

Of course, the smokers of the University of York, being naturally cunning vermin like all of their kind have managed to get their own back. With the removal of the ashtray from the front of the library and the frankly spotty policing of the anti-smoking policy smokers have been simply forced to throw their butts onto the ground in front of the doors, leading to a remarkable number of cigarette butts ending up trod into the carpet of the library foyer. Stick that in your pipe and…oh of course, you don’t smoke, do you?

Blind Date

YORK VISION

Tuesday January 14 2014

This week is a week of rivals at Blind Date wherein we paired up two student journalists.

BUT! There’s a twist. We have our very own Rachel Seymour, TV Editor, and Tom Witherow, a columnist at nouse. will love blossom despite the decades old rivalry, Or is an interpaper relationship out of the question? Let’s find out...

Tom on Rachel

Rachel on Tom

What’s the first thing you noticed about them?

The audience of Vision members standing round our table - clearly angling for an awkward start

He looked nice, and he was a lot less awkward than me.

What did you talk about?

Why onion rings make good bracelets, being terrible housemates, Rachel’s attempts at being a BNOC (not going well), favourite books, films etc, female sex toys

School, gap yahs, all sorts.

Any awkward moments?

Not after her entourage had left!

None that I can think of.

What were they wearing?

Black and white dress, pretty gold-ish necklace.

An open shirt and pants.

What did you eat?

I had steak and chips, she had an arty hamburger.

The world’s tallest burger, served on a piece of rock.

Best thing?

We didn’t run out of things to talk about. Always a positive.

He was really easy to talk to, and easy on the eyes!

Did you go on anywhere?

No, but we did get more drinks after dinner.

The world’s tallest burger, served on a piece of rock.

If you met in Willow, would you go home together?

Stranger things have certainly happened.

Who knows, he’s a looker so maybe!

Did you end on a hug, a kiss, or more?

Hug.

We walked home together (she said this with a saucy wink)

Did you exchange numbers? Venue planned for round two?

Sadly not!

Marks out of 10?

Eight and a half out of ten.

No. I found his Facebook though...

Marks out of 10?

8/10

DATING UPDATE Milo and Emy went on two dates after their steamy blind date. However, sadly their ill-fated romance slowly fizzled out and they have not seen each other since before Christmas. Maybe they just weren’t a match.

If you’re looking for love and want to try Blind Date, get involved by emailing lifestyle@yorkvision.co.uk

For more of York Vision’s match-making misadventures visit: www.yorkvision.co.uk/lifestyle Blind Date is kindly sponsored by the Lamb and Lion.

YORK VISION

LIFESTYLE//HEALTH&FITNESS

Tuesday January 14 2014

DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME!

23

My Week on the Butterfield Diet Plan

In late 2007 a fad diet was sweeping the nation - its name? The Brian Butterfield Diet. The only difference between this diet and other equally bizarre get slim quick crazes was that this one was an intentionally ridiculous sketch created by the comedian Peter Serafinowicz. With an intake of around 800 calories in five days, It advocates almost a week of near starvation followed by a treat day where you are encouraged to gorge yourself. Now, in 2014, Jack Western decides to tread where no man has before and actually test the legacy of the Brian Butterfield diet. Read on if you dare...

What’s involved?

1

The first day started and I was full of hope, mainly due to the fact that it was New Years Eve the night before, and I was still full of pizza and whatever else I ate the night before. It almost seemed a joke when I ate the cornflake and drank my cup of coffee and duly tweeted my progress. This optimism continued all day as I ate my lunch with no ill effects becoming apparent. As the afternoon progressed I started to feel hunger, and realised that I couldn’t eat until much later. When I finally consumed the meagre meal, it was unbelievably delicious and I felt full for a brief time.

By the time I got tired, I was hungry and had to sleep on an empty stomach.

DAYS 1-5 Breakfast One cornflake, toasted with low fat spread. drink - hot water.

Lunch Small raw potato, peeled. salad (mini lettuce leaf) drink = room temperature water.

2

My idiotic promise still hadn’t quite settled in my mind as I had ‘breakfast’ in the morning. Luckily for me, I’ve never been a breakfast person so I can usually muscle through and have a big lunch instead. Physically and mentally I was still feeling pretty sharp as I had lunch and was able to function and get work done in the library. By the late afternoon though, the lack of energy going into my body started to become apparent as I suffered a relatively large crash and I practically fell asleep. By the time I had dinner I was getting especially hungry but it made no difference to how I felt and I went to bed soon after.

3

By the third day, I had begun to realise how foolish I had been to volunteer myself for this ordeal. The morning was uneventful though, as I think that getting enough sleep drastically improved the first part of the day.

Lunch was a welcome break from the constant hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach. Again, I managed to get some work done before suffering my daily crash in the later afternoon due to having no energy. Dinner was so good and by this point I was starting to constantly feel genuinely unwell.

4

On Day 4 it finally struck me quite how bad this “diet” is. I was already hungry when I woke up, and the cornflake was foul, despite it only being the tiniest amount of food. The only thing that pushed me through the morning was coffee (ok! I cheated a bit!) Lunch came around and never have I been so happy to eat such a bland meal. In comparison to the other daily meals, lunch is the only one with any real carbohydrates and energy locked in it. To quote one of my frequent status updates; “I would literally do anything to have another potato for dinner tonight”. Going back through my notes, I also noticed arguably the most terrifying note. Scribbled at the bottom of the page were the words ‘Took my first shit in four days’. I don’t know if that was relief from being able to perform a normal bodily function or the fact that I didn’t miss it.

5

The final day rolled around and by this point, I didn’t really care. I didn’t feel hungry or full; I just had a constant ache in my stomach that was never stopped by anything. Breakfast and lunch passed with a happy tear in my eye, knowing that I was nearly done. I achieved nothing, only leaving bed somewhere around midday. Even then, I got relatively little done sitting in the Vision office as I began to crunch through my notes. I decided to have my final meal in the office, partly to celebrate the end of the diet, partly to show the sadistic bastards what they’d

Dinner Square of low fat turkey breast.

Baked bean in low fat tomato sauce.

Brocolli shavings. drink = chilled water. pudding - ice cubes and artificial sweetener.

NO DRINK put me through.

By this point I was exhausted, I could barely stand and I was having difficulty speaking. The last meal passed my lips, and with a sigh of relief I knew that I was free. In a little over six hours I could have my treat day, and eat anything I wanted again.

Treat day! That magical day finally rolled around. I had to concede that there was no way I was going to get through everything on a list including Birthday Pie, Pork Cylinders, Mystery Meat, Sandwich Casserole, Bonbonbonbons etc. I couldn’ really afford it either. Eventually I settled for a nice Slab o’ Cow aka sirloin steak with chips and peppercorn sauce. I hadn’t realised that during the week, my stomach and appetite had shrunk drastically meaning that while I only bought a six-ounce steak I even struggled to finish what should have an easy job after being so hungry. However, it was REAL FOOD and I still relished the fact that I could eat proper meals again.

While it was amusing to complete the diet, it was definitely the worst idea I’ve had in some time. In the space of five days I consumed less food than I normally eat in a day, lost a lot of sleep and achieved relatively little work. It was certainly made harder by the fact that I had started immediately after a time when overeating is rampant so it was a double shock to my system. Even worse was the effect on my body. In the space of 4 days I lost an unbelievable 12lbs.

Technically my body was starving and it was on the point of becoming atrophic where it would start to keep back fat reserves and go for my muscle mass instead. Fortunately it was only for 5 days, so I managed to avoid that stage.

While that is a crazy amount of weight loss and vaguely satisfying being able to start the new year without the Christmas pounds (and then some more), the amount of weight I lost and the time I lost it in was definitely not worth the pain and suffering I endured for it.

TREAT DAY

Pints o’ cream Potato grids Large macs Chocolate quail’s eggs Fluffy ruffs Pasta pillows Mcfortune cookies Egg ‘n’ ham slabs Pork cylinders Artificial bacon (Facon tm) Sandwich casserole Garlic pudding Hoisin crispy owl Bonbonbonbons Discount foie gras During-dinner mints Quiches lorraine

Mmmm....nutritious!

Breakfast every day for a week on the Butterfield Diet - a toasted cornflake with low fat spread.

Photos: Jack Western

The man himself: Brian Butterfield

YORK VISION

SPORT

Tuesday January 14, 2014

sport 34th in BUCS: WHY?

25

Web: www.yorkvision.co.uk/sport Email: sport@yorkvision.co.uk Twitter: @YorkVisionSport

A

CHILLING arctic wind rips across 22 Acres sending a shiver down your spine, the fitness levels reach an all-time low after the exorbitance of the festive period, and the most depressing month of the year is nigh. Yet the socks are rolled up, the racquets, boots or sticks pulled out of the cupboard, as the sporting season is about to resume, and the job is only half done.

Effort, enthusiasm and an abundance of talent have dragged York up to 34th in the BUCS table, but a lot can still change in the next six months. #Top40 could become #Top30, or the unthinkable slump could

occur resulting in our beloved institution slipping back into the mire of 42nd or 43rd place. However, let’s be positive, this is a time for looking forward and for progression, it’s time for a breakthrough and this could well be our year.

But why? The question on everyone’s lips is how do we go from 43rd one year to 34th the next, our highest BUCS placing ever? My job may be to provide answers, but here I can’t put forward a definitive one. Better facilities, stronger leadership, more talented sportsmen, a build-up over a number of years, or simply luck? In truth it’s probably a combination of all of these, and much more, as over recent years we have promised to make steps forward, but only now are we truly reaping the rewards.

The development of new facilities has

THE BREAKDOWN: WHERE THE POINTS COME FROM 88 67

64

55

1

20 10

14

22 LEAGUES INDIVIDUAL & CUP

16

24

30

TABLE TENNIS TENNIS VOLLEYBALLL WATER POLO

17

FOOTBALL FUTSAL GOLF HOCKEY

AMERICAN FOOTBALL BADMINTON BASKETBALL CANOE CYCLING FENCING

19

40

39

34

51

LACROSSE NETBALL RUGBY UNION SQUASH

36

593

Photo: Jack Western

surely helped to boost the profile of sport at York, attracting more talented individuals to boost our teams, as well as allowing students to unlock their full sporting potential. The signs of progress were present last year, as Futsal made the semi-finals of the National Championships, Fencing and Lacrosse once more excelled, whilst Rugby claimed their vital promotion to the Northern Premier B. Yet still we failed to break into the Top 40, and in that respect what seemed like a successful year, could be categorised as a failure.

In contrast, this year promises to be one of success, as a number of teams such as Lacrosse, Football and Netball vie for promotion, whilst others such as Rugby and Women’s Football seek to consolidate after past successes. Finally after a number of years in the doldrums, something has clicked, sport at the University is moving forward, and a more professional approach is being adopted. Success spreads, the atmosphere improves, and the whole York sporting family moves forward; though of course there is still a long way to go.

Last year the combination of Rugby, Lacrosse, Fencing and Futsal earned 287 of York’s 655.5 points (43.8%), as they enjoyed exceptional years. In truth this year

is very much a similar story, with the same four sports supplying York with 272 of their current 613 points (44.4%). The difference, though, is that last year York gained 181 points through cup and individual performances, whereas to date they have only accumulated 22, and hopefully many more are to come. Instead, league performances currently provide 591 points in comparison to only 474.5 last year, and that’s before we consider that sports such as cricket, athletics and snooker have not yet been considered.

So, now for the predictions… if we put together this year’s league and last year’s cup and individual performances, as well as providing an estimated allowance of points for those sports that occur later in the year, York would have a grand total of roughly 830 points at the end of the year, which by last year’s reckoning would leave them in 35th place.

The only depressing bit is that Loughborough have already accrued more points than that from Swimming alone (872). Whether this is an accurate statistical analysis or purely a guess we’ll have to see, but regardless it is clear that progress has been made. How and why are more difficult to answer, but it is certain that for now the job is only half done.

IS ELITE SPORT UNDERMINED BY REALITY TV? CALLUM SHANNON

YES

LET’S GET one thing straight: sport based reality TV programmes have nothing to do with promoting their subject sport and everything to do with promoting the (often floundering) careers of their celebrity participants.

Watching a former Arsenal goalkeeper dropping his skating partner face first onto the ice rink, or a second rate comedian fail at diving into a swimming pool makes a mockery of the sports they attempt and does nothing to encourage people to watch professional sport, let alone take part in it.

Take the BBC’s ever popular Strictly Come Dancing, for example. Regularly attracting over nine million viewers, the show has done nothing to enhance the profile of ballroom dancing. This is because, as much as TV producers want to deny it, people aren’t tuning in to watch sport, they’re tuning in to watch celebrities humiliate themselves. For instance, Ann Widdecombe, who had about as much aptitude for dance as your typical student in Willow after a few Sambuca shots, managed to last until week nine of the competition.

With reality TV being some viewer’s only experience of some sports, especially more obscure and niche ones like ballroom dancing and diving, to portray them as a laughing stock does nothing to enhance the credibility or popularity of the event.

If people think they portray an accurate representation of the sport they spotlight, they’re going to be disappointed when they go and watch leading figure skaters.

ANGUS QUINN

NO

IF YOU think elite sport is undermined by reality TV you’re barmy. There’s no way that anyone actually thinks an Emmerdale actress, reality Z-lister or Bonnie Langford are actually competent as professional divers or figure skaters after being on a reality show.

Obviously they aren’t, that’s why they’re always paired with a professional or have Tom Daley plunging off the board before them to put them into perspective.

In any case, if you think the point of the show is to make people into excellent athletes then you’ve missed the point. The idea

behind the show is how hilarious it is to see amateurs try and tackle what are in fact incredibly difficult and taxing disciplines. We don’t want precision dives we want someone to belly flop and emerge swearing and come back to the surface covered in bruises.

Reality TV helps boost the profile of elite sports around the world. Splash! might have been launched from the Olympic zeitgeist that took the nation by storm in 2012, but it can surely only have helped to raise the profile of professional diving and inspired others to follow in the footsteps of Tom Daley. Likewise with Dancing on Ice, the show has served to enshrine Torvill & Dean’s performance to ‘Bolero’ in Sarajevo in 1984 as a national triumph and a supreme endeavour to be aspired towards. It is always the last dance to be performed because it is the most difficult and is now universally recognised as being incredibly challenging and that can only strengthen the profile of figure skating as an elite discipline.

26 SPORT

YORK VISION

SPOTLIGHT: TRIATHLON

Tuesday January 14, 2014

MADDI HOWELL TRIES OUT THE SPORT THAT ROLLS THREE INTO ONE...

In the latest installment of Spotlight, Maddi Howell made the trip down to the Triathlon club, to try her hand at one of the University of York’s newest sports.

Thursday: With the prospect of a 10am morning run at the athletics track on Saturday and a 7.30am swim on Sunday, I feeling ready to be challenged, humiliated and severely out of breath. Although to my (incredibly sporty, member of senior rowing and owner of a ‘proper’ bike) housemate’s amusement I do possess a pair of goggles. I hope my green flowery bikini will make the cut. In terms of fitness, I’ve only been to one yoga class since before Christmas, so I have to say I was slightly worried.

Saturday: Having managed to resist the temptations of Phat Fridays, I was up and ready for the morning run. When I arrived at the athletics track, the sun was shining and I found a friendly bunch of people ready for action, identifiable by their ‘TRIATHLON ‘emblazoned kit. We took a route round the Fulford Golf Course, and I enjoyed the supportive and sociable training atmosphere (a contrast to the dreaded cross-country runs I remember from school!).

It was brilliant to start my weekend on a feel-good high, and the President of the committee Sam Davies and Press and Publicity Secretary Stuart MacGregor helpfully pushed me to keep going with their motivational approaches. Sam encouraged me to pick a goal such as the next landmark and then choose another one as I got to it, which seemed to be a trick into carrying on that fitness-improving bit further!

Although I managed to complete 8km

without collapsing too badly, one runner lapped me completely; so there’s still a lot to improve on!

Sunday: Luckily, our photographer Jack failed to make the early 7.30am start for B group swimming, so I have avoided any action shots of my limited swimming technique. The sets of strokes were recommended on a board (a warm up, pre-sets, main set of twenty lengths of front crawl and a warm down). The lanes were closed off for us, and I was largely left to get on with my lengths, although Stuart helped out with my breathing technique and partially forgotten front crawl form!

Once again, it seemed like this is a club where members help each other out and egg one and other on to improve and push on. This early morning swim was a great way to start a Sunday.

If you are time limited, this is the sport to go for as the combination of running and cycling mixes up your workout and the swimming gives your joints a good massage, (with the benefit of a sauna, steam room and Jacuzzi available on a Sunday morning with a membership at the Sports Village). In addition to the sessions I joined, the club runs a weekly evening run, spin sessions, and a road cycle.

It’s an adventurous mix and it means you get a chance to get out and about away from the seemingly endless cycle of revision, essays and the campus bubble.

The bonus is the opportunity to work towards Triathlon competitions in the Spring season and I have no doubt that the adrenalin rush at reaching the finish line is well worth the slog!

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YORK VISION

SPORT

Tuesday January 14, 2014

COLLEGE RUGBY: JAMES THRASH ALCUIN 48-0

JAMES 1STS made the perfect start to the Spring term with a crushing win over Alcuin in wintery conditions on 22 Acres.

After a morning of college football cancellations due to heavy frost, it was decided that this fixture would go ahead. Neither team were able to field a full fifteen, so it was decided to make it a ten-a-side game, playing twenty minutes each way – an improvement, at least, on Saturday’s cancelled match between Derwent and Goodricke.

Charlie Burton’s James team ran in four tries of real quality in a rampant first half.

Alcuin responded well after the break, but were unable to get on the scoreboard, as in the dying embers of the game, James were able to punish them for their profligacy.

The reds got off to a bad start from the first whistle as the ball found its way into the hands of James’ Alex Renwick, who shrugged off several weak challenges to go down in the corner within the first minute.

A scrappy period of play ensued as Alcuin tried to secure a sustained period of possession, but they were unable to clear their lines. Ed Pallister came away with the ball for James, and seemed destined to score himself, but he had to settle for an assist, offloading under pressure to Patrick Mayer for a simple finish. Two more tries followed after some desperately half-hearted Alcuin defending to leave the scoreline looking ominous at half-time.

Alcuin could easily have folded and let the James try-count slip into double figures,

but it was a strong testament to the bravery of Sonny Dewfall’s injury-plagued squad that they played with greater gusto after the interval. The ball rarely left Alcuin’s territory in the first period, but they came close to a try at the start of the second half, before being undone by a knock-on just metres out.

James eventually rediscovered their earlier rhythm, and Renwick had his second try of the afternoon as he strolled over the line. Time and again, Alcuin, led by the endeavour of Joe Wareing at the breakdown, tried to respond, only to see James’ pace prove too much for their back-line.

Mayer scored his second following a quick tap-and-go penalty. Matt Stehrenberg-

er scored in the final few seconds to bring the final score to 48-0 and complete the rout.

A satisfied James captain Burton told Vision: “It was a successful game for us.

We’ve got a lot of respect for Alcuin, and we’re pleased to come away with a great result in such tough conditions. Charlie Forley was outstanding, he made a huge number of tackles. We can’t wait for the next game against Halifax.”

Alcuin captain Dewfall stated: “There are a lot of positives despite the defeat. We had a lot of players missing today, and the conditions were really tricky. The second half performance was a lot better, we won’t let today define our season.”

COLLEGE VARSITY QUALIFIERS

VISION CAN exclusively reveal the full fixture list for this year’s inaugural College Varsity Qualifers, which will see the top College teams battle it out for a spot against Durham on 2nd March in what promises to be an absorbing day. 24 fixtures will be played, with all but one on the weekend of the 8th and 9th February (week 5).

Saturday 8th February 10:30 – Netball, Semi-Final, Tennis Dome.

Goodricke v James 11:00 - Men’s Football Semi-Final, 22 Acres.

Derwent v Halifax 11:30 – Badminton Semi-Final, Main Hall.

Wentworth v Derwent 12:30 – Netball Semi-Final, Tennis Dome.

Derwent v Halifax 13:00 – Men’s Football Semi-Final, 22 Acres.

James v Vanbrugh 13:00 – Women’s Football Semi-Final, Tent 1.

Vanbrugh v Derwent 14:00 – Badminton Semi-Final, Main Hall.

Goodricke v James 14:15 – Basketball Semi-Final, Tent 2.

Wentworth v Vanbrugh 14:30 – Women’s Football Semi-Final, Tent 1.

Langwith v James 15:45 – Basketball Semi-Final, Tent 2.

Langwith v James

Photo: Philip Mourdjis

YORK HOSTS INDOOR FRISBEE TOURNAMENT

THE UNIVERSITY of York staged one of the largest indoor Ultimate Frisbee tournaments in Britain over the weekend.

More than thirty teams from across the country took part in the annual “Yindoors” event, which was staged across Saturday and Sunday in the Tent.

The tournament was open to a wide range of age groups, and included York alumni. In the open league, dominated by men, York won the plate in ninth place, whilst the women’s team took tenth in their league. The overall winners in both leagues were “Dazed”, who beat last year’s winners “Some Team” in the final.

The two-day event had a festive, lighthearted atmosphere, with several teams kitted out in colourful fancy dress.

The event was also used as an opportunity to sell cakes for charity, with all proceeds going to Cancer Research UK. York Ultimate’s Jessie Davidson told Vision: “There is a different vibe to Yindoors than you would see at our regional and national competitions - the emphasis is on everyone having a good time rather than winning.”

27

15:45 – Volleyball Semi-Final, Tent 1.

Wentworth v Langwith 17:15 – Volleyball Semi-Final, Tent 1.

Derwent v Alcuin Sunday 9th February 10:00 – Hockey Semi-Final, JLD. James v Halifax 10:30 – Rugby Semi-Final, 22 Acres.

Halifax v Vanbrugh 11:30 – Hockey Semi-Final, JLD. Goodricke v Langwith 12:00 – Badminton Final, Main Hall.

Wentworth/Derwent v Goodricke/James 12:30 – Rugby Semi-Final, 22 Acres.

Derwent v James 13:30 – Women’s Football Final, Tent 1.

Vanbrugh/Derwent v Langwith/James 14:00 – Men’s Football Final, 22 Acres.

Derwent/Halifax v James/Vanbrugh 14:45 – Volleyball Final, Tent 1.

Wentworth/Langwith v Derwent/Alcuin 16:00 – Netball Final, Tennis Dome.

Goodricke/James v Derwent/Halifax 17:15 – Hockley Final, JLD. James/Halifax v Goodricke/Langwith 17:15 – Basketball Final, Tent 2.

Wentworth/Vanbrugh v Langwith/James Wednesday 12th February

Photo: Jack Western

14:00 – Rugby Final, 22 Acres.

Halifax/Vanbrugh v Derwent/James

28

YORK VISION Tuesday January 14, 2014

FROM ROSES TO RIO - 201 2

1

TOURNAMENT TIME

6

5 BUCS: THE BID FOR TOP 40

9

Prediction: Derwent show their spirit and resilience to win at least one of Rowing and Swimming, whilst James and Alcuin shine.

2) Sochi Winter Olympics It may not be London 2012, but the Sochi Winter Olympics are less than a month away, and this February we’ll see the best skiers, snow-

ROSES: CAN YORK WIN AWAY?

10

COLLEGE SPORT STANDINGS 1) College Rowing & Swimming The excitement starts early, with two of the biggest one-day tournaments of the year, firstly Rowing in the Roger Kirk at 7pm on Sunday, and then the following Sunday (Week 3) sees Swimming take place, where we’ll have a combination of the serious and more laughable races on display. There’s more to follow with Lacrosse and of course College Sports Day to come later on in the year.

WINTER OLYMPICS: GB GOLDS?

boarders and skaters in the world competing at the pinnacle of their sport. Four years ago Amy Williams won gold in Vancouver, can someone replicate her success this time?

Prediction: Medals won’t be easy for Team GB, but who know we may sneak one or two.

3) College Varsity New always means exciting, and this year’s inaugural College Varsity against Durham promises to be one of the most enthralling events of the year. 16 matches will be contested between the leading college teams from each institution on 2nd March, whilst before then we have the excitement of College Varsity qualifiers weekend to look forward to on the 8th and 9th of February.

Prediction: Well, as College Sport Officer I have to say a York victory don’t I really. In truth, it’s hard to say with it being new.

THE WORLD CUP 4) Six Nations Preparations for the 2015 Rugby World Cup continue, as England look to avenge their humiliating loss at the hands of Wales 12 months ago. France had a dismal time last year, and will look to bounce back, whilst Ireland and Wales will once more prove stern tests for this English side, whose target is surely victory in the World Cup in 2015.

Prediction: Difficult to say, but France are a funny team, and I think they’ll bounce back and win it this year. Second or third again for England.

5) BUCS, BUCS & a bit more BUCS It’s a matter of so far so good for York, and we’ll be looking to keep it up this term as we aim to consolidate our position in 34th place.

A number of teams including Lacrosse, Netball and Football are in search of promotion, whilst others are battling against the drop.

What is certain is that some crucial and exciting weeks of sport lie in store.

Prediction: York to keep up the good work, and my statistical analysis says we’ll finish 35th. See page 26.

6) Roses This simply wouldn’t be complete without a mention of Roses, as York look to claim that much sought after away Roses victory. Can we do it? Well, you have to think we have an excellent chance after cruising to victory last year and currently sitting 12 places above Lancaster in the BUCS standings. Away Roses are always tough though, and this promises to be a tight one.

Prediction: I’m in a positive mood this year, and I really believe we can win away this year, an 18 point margin of victory in York’s favour.

SPORT

YORK VISION

Tuesday January 14, 2014

14: WHAT LIES IN STORE? 4

3

NEW COLLEGE VARSITY

29

Photos: Jack Western & Philip Mourdjis

SIX NATIONS: THE TEST

8

7 THE COLLEGE CUP

11

12

COMMONWEALTH GAMES 7) The College Cup After the excitement of Roses we have the College Cup, as Halifax aim to continue their excellent College Cup record and retain the trophy. The winners of the autumn league James are likely to be in contention, whilst Derwent and Vanbrugh will be in the mix.

Of course there’ll be a surprise package, last year was James 3rds, this year who knows…

The magic of the cup!

Prediction: A rematch of last year’s final, but this time Derwent to record a 2-1 victory over Halifax.

8) Barclays Premier League Is it Arsenal or Liverpool’s year? I’d love to say yes, but sadly I think not. Manchester City and Chelsea appear the two favourites, whilst the transfer business of the next month could be crucial. At the other end the likes of West Ham, Sunderland a and Fulham

PREMIER LEAGUE: WHOSE YEAR?

are all in danger, but predicting who will go down is in truth a bit of a lottery.

Prediction: Manchester City to claim their second title in three years, United to sneak into fourth on the last day of the season, whilst West Ham, Crystal Palace and Sunderland suffer the drop.

9) The overall College Sport standings Is Derwent’s dominance of College Sport about to come to an end? Finally they have suffered defeat in College Rugby, whilst they have been edged off top spot in the overall standings by James. Wentworth and Goodricke have shown signs of improvement, whilst Alcuin and Vanbrugh struggle.

Whose year is it set to be, and will someone finally be able to topple the mighty Derwent?

Prediction: James. It’s time for a change at the top, and their consistency makes them my favourites.

MORE SUCCESS FOR MURRAY? 10) The World Cup It’s one of those years again where everyone becomes a football fan. We haven’t had much to cheer of late, and the prospects don’t look great for England in a challenging group and without the form to suggest they will challenge the top teams. Anything can happen though, and progress through the group and a decent draw lies in store.

Prediction: The quarter finals are a possibility, but we’re not good enough to challenge the very best. Home advantage makes Brazil my tip.

11) Commonwealth Games Scotland prove the hosts this year, and the two-week multi-sport event is just one of many exciting competitions that lie in store.

Who will emerge as the star of the Games, and who will flop? In truth only time will tell, but the competition has the potential to leave

a sporting legacy in Scotland, and hopefully see the emergence of new British talent.

Prediction: The event will be a success, but I’m not even going to try and guess how many medals we’ll win.

12) More success for Murray?

A two-time Grand Slam winner, can Andy Murray add to his collection in 2014, or will Rafael Nadal and Novak Djokovic continue to prove the dominant forces in tennis? The Australian Open is underway, while Wimbledon again promises to be a stunner. Can Laura Robson continue her progress, and will another young British player emerge to become the next star?

Prediction: Murray is now more experienced and confident, and I can see him notching up his third Grand Slam title, most likely at the US Open again.

30 SPORT

YORK VISION

James 5 - 0 Langwith

Tuesday January 14, 2014

Champions James put Langwith to the sword on 22 Acres

King James V A FRANTIC and congested opening gave way to the formality of a 5-0 James rout in extremely frosty conditions on 22 Acres. James showed excellent control of possession throughout, limiting Langwith to long balls and half chances in the ninety minutes.

In the early exchanges, Langwith were resilient, but once James captain Ralph Gill broke the deadlock in the twenty-second minute, they never looked back. Matt Singleton would head in an easy second before the break, then in the second half Freddie Ferrao and Singleton compounded Langwith’s misery before James Briars rounded it off with a fifth.

Langwith came out with intent to battle.

Louis Pegg was particularly tenacious in the first half, doggedly hunting down every James pass in the middle of the park.

However. for all their hard work, they simply couldn’t get a foothold in the game, and it was James who were dictating the tempo, with Freddie Ferrao creating space for Matt Singleton to fire well over the bar from just outside the area.

If that was the warning shot, Langwith did not heed it, as moments later Ralph Gill escaped the attentions of his marker, swivelled in the area, dropped the shoulder and coolly side-footed beyond Kris Cheshire and into the corner of the net for 1-0.

Gill was back in the thick of the action straight away following his goal, a cute onetwo with Freddie Ferrao allowing the latter

to drive in a cross which narrowly evaded the head of Matt Singleton.

That man Singleton would smash against the bar from close range when it was easier to score following a great reaction save from Cheshire, but he would not be denied for long, nodding a free header into the top right corner of the goal from a corner kick in the twenty-eighth minute to double James’ lead.

Langwith were penned into their half for long periods by James’ intense possession game, but the last action of the half would see Andy Hutt race clean through on goal following a missed interception, but with James ‘keeper Andy Balzan exposed and the goal at his mercy, the Langwith striker side-footed meekly wide with zero conviction. James’ lead remained intact.

The second half continued in the same vein as the first, with James working hard to create chances and Langwith determined to keep them honest. A moment of controversy arose in the fiftieth minute when James were awarded a penalty for a Langwith handball which was not massively appealed for, but was awarded by the referee. Ferrao was having a great morning out on the wing, and he needed no second invitation to contribute to the scoring, planting his penalty beyond the despairing dive of Cheshire.

Though Andy Hutt was embroiled in a thankless task ploughing a lone furrow up front, he was able to demonstrate some great guile in providing Tom Benney with an opportunity to volley at goal. The chance was awkward though, and by taking too long to shape his body, Benney gave Callum Elliott time to come across and block his effort.

That was the last piece of goalmouth action Langwith would see. Matt Singleton would grab his second, and James’ fourth of the game with a wonderful finish from the edge of the area, before Callum Elliott lofted a great pass in the direction of James Briars, who confidently dispatched the final fifth goal beyond Kris Cheshire.

James would threaten to turn proceedings into a cricket score, first through an improvised half-volley from hat-trick seeking Matt Singleton, and secondly when James Briars jinked into the box and looked for all the world like he would side-foot a telling sixth across Cheshire and into the net- but the Langwith keeper showed great reach to claw away his goalbound effort.

After the game, a delighted James Captain Ralph Gill said: “That was a great way to start the New Year. It was a convincing victory, we thwarted Langwith’s attacks and made the most from our innumerable chances.”

In contrast his opposite number, Marcus Campbell, was disappointed with his side’s performance, and told Vision: “We were missing key players today, but that’s no excuse for our poor performance and poor fitness.

“We had chances, but we failed to convert them, and we’ll have to come out better next week.”

JAMES (4-4-1-1): Balzan, Sangha, Elliott, Axwood, Alhassan, Jopson (Briars), Gill, Spurling, Haresnape, Ferrao, Singleton LANGWITH (4-2-3-1): Cheshire, Rogers, Starling, Pickersgill, Benney, Pegg, Hudson, Campbell, Hazell, Gates, Hutt

MATCH STATISTICS Possession 65%

35%

Shots 19

3

Shots on Target 10

1

Fouls 4

1

Offsides 0

0

YORK VISION

Tuesday January 14, 2014

SPORT

31

MORE MISERY FOR ALCUIN ALCUIN

0

WENTWORTH

2

IT MAY be the spring term, but conditions were positively wintery as Wentworth overcame Alcuin 2-0 in their opening college football fixture after the Christmas break.

The game was placed in doubt by the morning frost, but after a half-hour delay the captains decided the ground was fit for play.

The match was of generally poor quality from start to finish. The quality that was on show came largely from the postgraduates, and two first half goals from Ciaran Lynch and Chris Papoui secured victory.

The first real chance of the game came after 16 minutes, as Papoui found himself through on goal inside the box, but miscued his shot wide of the post.

After 23 minutes they got the break-

through, though it came with at least a touch of good fortune.

Alcuin keeper Neil Lawrence received a bobbling back-pass inside the box, but his first touch failed to get the ball out of his feet.

Wentworth’s Ciaran Lynch closed in, and although Lawrence got his kick in first, he could only blast it against the attacker, and it ricocheted straight into the Alcuin net.

Alcuin’s first good chance came shortly before the half-hour mark. Andy Fernando’s excellent 30-yard free kick was excellently tipped onto the crossbar by Wentworth keeper Jon Cook. That save paid dividends five minutes later as Wentworth’s lead was doubled by winger Papoui.

He put his disappointing miss from earlier in the game behind him, finding room on the edge of the box to drive a low shot into the corner of the goal, beyond Lawrence.

Wentworth had two more chances to extend their lead before the half. The first saw Dom Green blast a powerful shot across the face of goal, but wide of the far post.

The second was courtesy of a Lawrence error, as he failed to connect with another clearance, but defender Sean Perera got in just ahead of Lynch to prevent a third.

In the second half, as the morning sun drifted behind the building clouds, there was no change in the pattern of the game.

Wentworth, comfortable in their lead, never looked likely to relinquish it, despite a couple of decent Alcuin chances.

The most notable came moments after the restart, a goalmouth scramble following a corner providing Alcuin with a few bites at the cherry but with no success.

Green, the Wentworth talisman, proved to be a thorn in his opponents’ side with some great skill but lacked the finishing to go with it.

His best effort was blocked on the line

by Jack McConnell, guarding the near post from a corner. On another occasion, he set himself up on the volley with an audacious piece of skill but couldn’t apply the finish.

Alcuin, trailing by two and needing something special to get back into the game, were unable to break down their opponents.

And it was Wentworth who looked more likely to score – which they did, before that effort was bizarrely chalked off.

Oleg Benesch unleashed a shot just inside the near post from a narrow angle, beating Lawrence with the power of his strike.

But as Wentworth began to celebrate, the referee – wrongly – submitted to protests that the ball had gone through the side netting.

Wentworth’s reaction was more befuddlement than anger, but the game was already over as a contest.

Photos: Zoe Bennell

Photos: Jack Western

CANCELLATIONS AS WEATHER WINS IT WAS a case of victory for the weather this weekend, as a number of College Sport fixtures were cancelled due to a heavy frost, which left a number of pitches frozen on Sunday morning.

Two of the opening round of College Football fixtures were cancelled, and will be rearranged for a later date, after captains and officials deemed them unfit to play on due to the Arctic temperatures.

Last term’s runners-up Derwent were amongst the teams to have their match cancelled, as their fixture against Goodricke succumbed to the elements, whilst the high-

ly-anticipated contest between Halifax and Vanbrugh was also postponed.

In addition to this, the opening round of hockey fixtures were all cancelled, as the freezing temperatures left the JLD in a rockhard and unplayable state.

James were looking to extend their tremendous unbeaten run in the highlight of the day’s fixtures, as they were set to meet last term’s runners-up Goodricke. However once more the weather prevailed, leading to the cancellation of this fixture along with the other matches involving Halifax, Derwent, Alcuin and Vanbrugh.

The presence of the YIndoors Frisbee tournament meant that the tent was unavailable for use for College Basketball, whilst the

College Rugby fixture between Derwent and Goodwith was cancelled, after the College from Hes East to field a side.

The cancellations put increased pressure on a hectic College Sport calendar, which is already strained due to the presence of College Varsity and Qualifiers weekend.

College Sport Officer Dave Washington said: “It’s obviously very frustrating that we’ve lost a number of fixtures to the weather this weekend, but sadly we have to accept that freezing weather is likely this term.

“Hopefully we won’t have the hazard of snow this term, as we can ill-afford more cancellations, but we’ll endeavour to ensure all fixtures are completed, and hope the weather is fine for College Varsity later this term.”

V SPORT

SPOTLIGHT: 2014: WHAT TRIATHLON LIES IN STORE?

ALCUIN 0 JAMES 48

P27

P26

P28-29

JAMES DEFY WEATHER

Photo: Zoe Bennell

they bagged two first half goals to record their first victory of the term against a struggling Alcuin side.

JAMES BEAT the elements on SunThe freezing weather claimed the day morning to claim a comfort- other two football fixtures though, able 5-0 victory over Langwith in the whilst also resulting in the cancellation opening round of this term’s College of all three College Hockey fixtures.

Football calendar.

However, James rugby also defied Two goals from Matt Singleton the cold to start the term with a bang, as helped last term’s champions to contin- they easily brushed aside the challenge ue their excellent form, whilst Langwith of Alcuin to cruise to a 48-0 victory. struggled to assert themselves in the The College Sport calendar contincontest. ues next week, as we build up to the The postgraduates of Wentworth high-profile event of this term in the were the other winners of the day, as shape of College Varsity.

Reports: Pages 30-31

> FREEZING WEATHER CAUSES MAJOR DISRUPTION RESULTING IN THE CANCELLATION OF A NUMBER OF FIXTURES > HOWEVER JAMES BEAT THE COLD TO WIN IN FOOTBALL AND RUGBY

Issue 239

Tuesday January 14th, 2014

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