David Dushey In Loving Memory

DAVID DUSHEY IN LOVING MEMORY

Give sorrow words.

– WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE

Jan 23, 1990 - Jan 24, 2019

Dear David,

special ring-tone I had for your calls and text messages - but I know I will never hear that sound again - or hear you ask “What’s up, Mom? or hear you say “I love you Mom,” which you did all the time. You loved so easily and so deeply. And you showed your love freely. You had the biggest heart and gave the best hugs… All I want is to feel your arms around me again, for one more minute.

Your hugs were SO real. You were SO real David.

I remember when you were little, I would hold your warm hand in mine. When you started pre-school you were always self-conscious to hold the other kids hands because you thought your hands were sweaty. What you didn’t know was that everyone wanted to be close to you, to be your friend and to hold your hand. From a young age you had that effect. I just wish I could hold your little hand now, one more time.

There were so many things I wanted to say at your funeral and at the 1st areyat, but couldn’t. The words just wouldn’t come. But even thoough I am still struggling, I can’t remain silent now. It is not what you deserve. You deserve SO much more!

It has been a month since we received the phone call that would change our lives forever, and I still find it impossible to find the right words. I can’t believe you’re gone. Living life without you is so hard. I keep looking at my phone, hoping that at any moment I will hear the

Growing up you made quite the name for yourself. It wasn’t just David. It was David Dushey. You were so cute and so cool with your long blonde surfer hair. You were also so fearless. And it was hard to keep up. From trick bikes, to rollerblades, to razor scooters, snowboards to skateboards… you had to do it all and do it well. The house was stocked with an endless supply of bandaids for all your falls, cuts and bruises. How many trips to the emergency room to stitch up your chin? How many bandaged elbows and knees. Thru everything I was always there to kiss your scrapes and wipe your tears. No amount of band-aids could heal our broken hearts now or dry our tears. We miss you so much, David.

I want you to know that even tho their were some hard times along the way, you were the MOST amazing son.

Beyond your million-dollar smile, you had the BIGGEST heart - with a capacity to love unconditionally. You brightened every room you walked into. You had this amazing attitude and the GREATEST personality. You laughed easily and made everyone around you laugh

too. In the last 5 years, you taught me so much and I was always amazed at your level of understanding, compassion and ability to forgive. You were such a sensitive soul. And I was always so proud of that. But, I have never been prouder than I am now.

The legacy you leave behind will live forever.

You may have felt different, self-conscious or judged at times, but I hope you see how you affected everyone that knew you and even those who never did.

So many people have come to pay respects, to honor your life and share stories of what an incredible person you were. You meant SO much to SO many. You were so selfless and so giving, and as I am learning each day, helped more people than I could ever imagine. EVEN strangers.

Since you started walking, you were always obsessed with sneakers. From Keds, to Power Rangers, to light up sneakers, Heely’s, Vans, Nike, Air Force 1’s and Yeezy’s… sneakers were your passion. You were constantly buying, trading and selling sneakers. Whenever you came to visit me in Miami, you would come with 2 suitcases with no shame. One for your clothes and 1 filled with at least 10 pairs of sneakers. I could never understand how 1 kid with only 2 feet needed so many pairs.I will never forget the story about the homeless guy you used to pass on the street each day on your way to work. He had no shoes so you decided to bring him a pair of red Nike high-tops. He was so thankful. Weeks later you saw him again and he was still wearing your red Nike’s.

You went up to him and he told you “Man, you changed my life.”

David, you changed SO many people’s lives. You made people feel comfortable and made so many friends along the way. Everyone felt you were their best friend because you gave all of yourself to everyone. Everyone experienced firsthand what a wonderful loving person

you were. Every person you met had a story about you….

You had this SPECIAL GIFT. That is how POWERFUL you were David. I don’t even think you knew how many people you touched. You would be so amazed how many people were praying for you, how many are STILL praying, how many people are studying torah in your honor, running marathons in your memory, baking challahs, raising awareness, giving donations, speeches, creating programs in your name to help others, and yes… even building yellow houses.

Even though I had only 29 short years with you, David, you were my GREATEST blessing and my GREATEST love.

And today, even in this tragedy, our family is stronger because of you. You brought us together in Israel even in the most difficult circumstance. You brought us together in ways we never could have imagined. You helped us re-connect relationships that grew apart over the years.

You showed us the way to open our hearts and forgive mistakes and begin to heal.

You gave us strength, understanding and faith. This is entirely YOUR doing, David. You are no longer with us physically, but what you left us with is truly the most incredible gift. Now it is time for us to make YOU proud. And we will.

David, I love you with all my heart; I am SO proud of you.

Thank you for being my son and for the honor to be your mom. Thank you for being you, David.

I miss you SO much and I will remember you each minute of every day until we can hug and kiss each other again and I can hold your little sweaty hand in mine.

Love always, Mom

I never left you

I watch you ever y day I am always ver y near

I know deep in your heart Yo u r e a l i z e I a m h e r e

I watch you while you sleep In your bed at home

I hear you when you speak to me W hen you are on your own

Yo u c a n n o t u n d e r s t a n d

Death wont keep us apart

But I will never leave you

Just remember me in your heart

The reason why I have gone I am there to keep you strong Ta l k t o m e , I h e a r y o u

Though you may not see

We s h a r e a n u n b r o k e n b o n d That will always be

Fo r o u r l o v e i s f o re v e r

And one day we will be together Live your life and live it full D o n’ t w a s t e a s i n g l e d a y

Remember I am always with you Ever y step of the way

Dear Dave, My one and only big brother. I never could have prepared for this moment… I’m in so much pain trying to find the words to say. Your life was so big and adventurous.

Though it was cut unexpectedly short, you knew nothing less than to live it fully for 29 years. And I was so lucky to be a part of it. As your little sis, I wanted to share a piece of you with the world through my eyes.

Dave, you were always a charmer – even when we were little. Everyone loved you… your mushroom blonde haircut and big green eyes. You were good at everything!

And all I wanted was to be just like you. Remember when I thought I could be a skater girl? I got sneakers and you taught me how to do ollies in our basement. I used to steal your CD’s so I could listen to all your music. I wore your clothes to school and even got guitar lessons. I swore I knew the chords to Blink 182 by heart, but I didn’t have the talent like you did. You heard a song once and could play it with ease.

I remember listening to Time of Your Life over and over again. It brings me back to roller blading together in Battery Park with mommy. Driving to Butternut Lodge for ski trips with daddy. Watching you impress everyone – from the slopes to the skate parks. On one of our ski trips, you even convinced me I could do a jump. I felt invincible as I steadied my poles and put on a brave front, only to fly straight down and land face-planted in the snow. But you took off your board and ran over to give me a hand. We laughed so hard about it later.

You had a reputation that couldn’t be matched. People knew me first as David Dushey’s sister. And I didn’t mind.

You were the cool, blonde, surfer, skater kid everyone knew and loved. I wish you knew how much I looked up to you D. I was so excited for you to be an uncle one

day. You were going to be the best one ever.

You were the first grandson named David in the family.

And then 5 more followed… including my husband who reminds me of you in so many ways. He loved you like his own brother. And I’ll never forget the day I got engaged – how happy and excited you were for me. All I ever wanted was to see that day for you, and be the sister-inlaw to the lucky girl that won your heart.

Though the times we spent together became less frequent as we got older, they became that much more significant. The last time we were in Israel together for Cousin David’s bar mitzvah, we stood together in front of the Kotel in the unbearable heat, ate burgers and shawarma and took segways through the streets. It was my first time there, and it was so special to share that experience with you. I miss spending that time together Dave. I miss you and the bond we had as brother and sister.

You decided to go to Israel a few months ago to find a deeper purpose. We didn’t know then that you would eventually bring us all there, together as a family – a heart-breaking gift we never expected. We went to the Kotel to pray for you, and little did we know, we were tracing the steps you took every day. As we were leaving, mommy looked up – just 100 feet from the wall – only to see we were standing right in front of your school. Right there on the building was a plaque with the blessing, “And Eternal Life He implanted within us.” At that moment, we felt a sense of peace.

The last time we spoke was on my birthday. I was so happy to get your message. The very last thing you said to me was, “Love you and miss you more.” Dave, I am

here now – loving you so much and missing you so much more. In your final days in the hospital, we didn’t leave your side. I held your warm hand and touched your soft hair. I watched mommy carefully clean your beautiful skin. You were so peaceful and handsome. As difficult as this has been for us, I thank God every day that you were in peace. We played you the song you used to like. The lyrics are still repeating in my head: “Amber is the color of your energy.” You had so much of it, D. When I close my eyes, I see you and all the color that shined from you.

Your family loved you so much. For the past ten days, Uncle Selim, Uncle Erol, Cousin David, Raymond and Esther were right next to you. The outpouring of love and prayers was unmeasurable. You would have been so amazed Dave.

Our final moments together in the hospital were on your birthday. We printed pictures of you to keep near your bedside so we could see “that” smile that lit up any room. You had a strong effect on everyone who knew you, and even those that barely did. From the moment you were admitted to Hadassah hospital, the doctors and nurses became attached. One nurse even brought deodorant from her home to put on you, and we had a joke about how handsome and clean cut you were. Every day, you looked like you had just come back from the barber shop.

Mommy was helping you through everything – telling you not to be scared – and to imagine we were on the best family ski trip. You were snowboarding down the most beautiful mountain with the wind in your face and the sun in your eyes. You were soaring free. We were all right behind you, but we couldn’t keep up. You left us… and you left the most special mark on this world.

I promise to celebrate your life and hold on to your memor y as tight as I held your hand.

I love you so much David. Rest in peace.

Love Always, Ta r a

I cannot stronger who has and still

think of anyone than a mother lost her child breathes.

– Robina May

The pain I’m going thru in this moment is something indescribable .

I find very little courage to say a few words from being surrounded by all of you today who loved and cared about David.

David was a very special man.

He was an amazing loving son, a brother, grandson , a nephew, a cousin and a friend.

He was put on this earth to serve a purpose like everyone else and I believe he carried out that purpose to the fullest.

He reconnected and mended a lot of broken hearts.

David will be forever in our hearts and his accomplishments will never be forgotten.

I know he’s in a better place now in eternal peace.

David , I’m so sorry you left us so early on and all I can do is ask for your forgiveness .

Life will never be the same without you.

I’m a broken man.

I love you son and I know some day we will meet again.

Love Dad, Baruch Dayan Haemet

T h e u n i v e r s e i s a l w a y s s p e a k i n g t o u s ...

Sending us little messages, causing coincidences and serendipities, reminding us to stop, to look around, to believe in something else, something more.

Dear David, How many letters have I written to you over the years?

I can’t believe this is to be the final one. Your birthday was a couple of days ago. Every year on your birthday I would bless you that this would be the year you find contentedness and peace of mind. Well, I guess this year you did.. I didn’t want it to be this way. And I know you didn’t either. I know how much you wanted to live, to get married, have a family. So many unanswered questions. How I wish I could talk to you again. But I need to just accept. Gd is good. And this will be good.

But it hurts so much.

I used to tell you that you had a permanent spot in my heart. You burrowed your way in almost 23 years ago both literally and figuratively. Remember those Friday nights at Grandma’s - you would climb in my lap, bury your head in my neck and just hug me for hours. I literally had to pry you off of me when I wanted to get up. You used to tell me that you’ll never forget the first time you met me - it was love at first sight. And you were right.

There was that special bond that we had that was just there. And how could I not love you? With that smile that would light up a room.. And your heart. You had such a big heart and so much love to give.

You were a people person. You had a certain charm people loved you as soon as they met you. You knew how to make people feel good. How to say the right thing at the right time to make their day. How to really listen in a way that made the person know you truly cared about them. And you were able to read people very well. You always knew when I was upset about something (even when I tried to hide it) and would try to comfort me or make me feel better in any way that you

could. That meant so much to me - it showed how much you cared. You hated to see me bothered by anything.

You were so gentle with my kids. I have memories (and thankfully pictures too) of you sitting and reading to them on the couch or playing games with them.

Remember that adjustable indoor plastic basketball hoop we had in the living room? Remember how you used to play with the boys all the time? Until it finally gave out and we needed to throw it - you guys were so upset! When you came to live with us it brought your relationship with my kids to a whole new level. I loved to see how much you cared for them. Remember that time you took Joseph for ice cream when his first tooth fell out? Or took the kids ice skating just because? The kids still remember that trip to Dillon’s for their birthdays.

And how you loved Frieda - you would hug and kiss her all day. I remember you taking care of her while I got the other kids ready for bed. And remember those nights spent in the kitchen drinking hot chocolate and talking and laughing with the older ones till all hours?

Ok, so maybe you did fight with them too on occasion - but that’s because you were one of them. I know how much you loved them and they loved you. They loved hanging out with you. Loved when you came for dinner or would just hang out afterwards talking.

Remember that ski trip to Camelback when you taught David and Raymond how to snowboard? After their first day of lessons you took them out and taught them yourself. They said they didn’t need any more lessons after that - you were better than any snowboarding school. And now they love it as much as you did.

The kids were so happy and excited to hear you were coming to Israel. They couldn’t wait to spend time with you again. My heart swelled with joy knowing you would be together again. And you were going to a yeshiva!

Learning! I remember you calling me, confused, not sure if you should go or not. I was so proud that once again you were willing to step out of your comfort zone in order to try to better yourself. Dave, you worked so hard on yourself. You brought yourself to places you didn’t think you could reach. You had so much strength and courage. And I was the lucky one who got to see you change and grow before my eyes.

I don’t know what happens when a person passes, what they know or don’t know. But I hope somehow you know what happened down here this past week.

I was blown away by the amount of tehillim that was read round the clock for you. People didn’t stop. Even on Shabbat people signed up to read so the book was finished many times over. They had to keep opening new chats to allow more people to join and read. I hope you know how much you were loved.

Dave, we were all lucky to have you in our lives. There are people who wonder how I did what I did for you.

What they don’t realize is that it wasn’t a one way street with me helping you. It went both ways. We all grew and changed from the experience. We all came out better people from it. So how could I NOT have done what I did? I just wish my love was enough to heal.

I love you with all my heart and soul and miss you so much!

Al ways and Forever, Aurit Mom#2

Grief

G r i e f n e v e r e n d s . .. b u t i t c h a n g e s .

I t ’s a p a s s a g e , n o t a p l a c e t o s t a y.

Grief is not a sign of weakness, or a lack of faith.

I t ’s t h e p r i c e o f l o v e .

D e a t h t a k e s t h e b o d y.

God takes the soul.

Our mind holds the memories.

Our heart keeps the love.

Our faith lets us know we will meet again.

Faith

Thank you David.

First words coming to my mind will be thank you David.

Thank you for the love we shared since the day you came into my life.

From Miami, to NY or Canada, every time we spent together was magic.

Yo u a l w a y s o p e n e d u p t o m e , shared your feelings, doubts or dreams.

I guess your honesty was one of your many wonderful qualities.

Honesty is precious, honesty is rare.

Rare as you David.

R a r e a s y o u r g e n e r o s i t y.

From giving your time, your expertise and knowledge to anyone who needed your help to giving your sneakers to a barefoot homeless.

The beauty of the story is 2 weeks after, you saw this man again, but this time, he was wearing your shoes.

G-d bless you David.

There were too many miles between us, but my heart and my mind were always next to yours.

I miss you so much... but for some reason, you have never felt so close to me as now.

I love you son.

Fred.

Death is

nothing at all.

I have only slipped away into the next room.

I am I, and you are you,

W h a t e v e r w e w e r e t o e a c h o t h e r, that we are still.

Call me by the old familiar name.

Speak of me in the easy way which you always used.

Put no difference into your tone.

We a r n o f o r c e d a i r o f s o l e m n i t y o r s o r r o w.

Laugh as we always laughed At the little jokes that we e n j o y e d t o g e t h e r.

P l a y, s m i l e , t h i n k o f m e , pray for me.

Let my name be ever the

household word that it always was.

Let it be spoken without an effort, Without the ghost of a shadow upon it.

Life means all that it ever meant.

It is the same as it ever was.

There is absolute and u n b r o k e n c o n t i n u i t y.

What is this death but a negligible accident?

W hy should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?

I am but waiting for you, for an interval,

S o m e w h e r e v e r y n e a r, J u s t r o u n d t h e c o r n e r.

All is well.

- HENRY SCOTT HOLLAND

I’ve been fortunate enough to have David Dushey in my life as a brother and friend even before Tara and I got married. Every time we spoke, his radiant smile and genuine personality always stuck with me. He was just so easy. No matter how long it had been since we last saw each other, when we were together, we were brothers.

Dave was one of the hungriest people I ever met. I mean that literally and figuratively. There was always an idea in his head. There was always another fire burning. He admired mine and Tara’s relationship and loved coming over for dinners. Tara would go all out to put together a feast, and we would just sit around, catch up, and talk about everything from family & friends to life & music and always business. He was so passionate and motivating. We would sit around the table and push each other to remove ourselves from things that didn’t matter and appreciate the things that did. At the time, it was all so simple.

Dave looked up to so many people, but I wish he knew how much we looked up to him. I wish he knew how much he meant to us and how lucky we felt to have him as our brother. In the past few weeks, so many people have been sharing their own experiences with Dave–even if it was just a simple hello on the train that would turn into an hour-long conversation. It’s hard to put into words the effect that David Dushey had on so many peoples’ lives. From one-day encounters to years of friendships, his personality was infectious. I am so grateful and proud to know him as a brother.

It’s been difficult to rationalize why Hashem took such a beautiful soul so young from olam hazeh. A few weeks before David left to Israel was Parashat Lech Lecha.

There are a few interpretations on what exactly Lech Lecha meant to Abraham but when I was re-reading Rabbi J Sachs’ “Four Dimensions of the Journey,” one interpretation really resonated with me.

Lech Lecha.“Go by yourself.” Only one able to leave behind the things we are born into, that influence who we become – home, family, culture and society – can one form a relationship with God who stands above and beyond nature. A journey into the unknown is one of the greatest possible expressions of freedom.

I genuinely believe this was Hashem’s test to David like it was to Abraham- Dave left everything he had and loved here just for a chance to connect with Hashem spiritually. Sometimes you have to give up your past in order to acquire a future. When David decided to go to Israel, he was doing just that and in turn, fulfilled God’s test and achieved the greatest expression of freedom.

He knew he had to give up his past to get to his future.

As hard as it is to come to terms, I know that David fulfilled his mission in this world and left ever ything he knew and ever yone he loved to be close to God. Dave, I miss and love you so much.

David Eliau

Cousin Dave, You were always cousin David. Mushroom blonde hair always smiling, Cousin David.

When we were little and we used to sleep by grandma Esther for Shabbat on Avenue K, spending time with cousin David meant we were going to have a good time. The Dwecks would come too and for 25 hours we were just in our own little cousins world. We used to collect all the winter coats and pile them up on the floor and put chairs all around them the jump into them; this activity became known as “kabooli” as thats what we would scream and we jumped in. Grandma had the biggest living room filed with Turkish rugs and we would each take a rug and spin around and around and around until we couldn’t anymore, and anybody who stepped off their mat was out! We used to build forts in Uncle Erol’s room with tons of blankets and books and bookshelves and that wooden stick. Once it was nice and sturdy we would bring Stella D’oro cookies up there.

When we got invited to ‘cousin David and tara’ it was so much fun to spend time in your super cool wooden basement. When I think back, I just hear you laughing.

Always having the best time.

One time, when I was 8 and you were 6, you were in our basement playing, and as usual when we were spending time together, we did a lot of running and lively playing.

I accidentally tripped over your foot and was bleeding from my mouth. You were so concerned. I needed stitches and until my parents took me to the dr you stayed near me making sure I was ok.

As we got older, we stopped seeing each other as much, as we didn’t come to Grandma as often anymore.

I remember how we all would go outside and watch you do some crazy skater tricks, you were really the best, everyone knew that. You were fearless. We always couldn’t wait when we heard you were coming over for Shabbat. We would all sit at the end of the table and laugh together and your laugh, it was one of a kind.

Dave, we are all here wishing we can just have one more moment with you, maybe just to hear you laugh, or to just see you smile, but we know that you are in a better place, watching over us. You will always be in our hearts.

L o v e E s t h e r, D a v i d , Ronnie, Abe, and Rochelle.

Do not stand at my grave and weep I am not there, I do not sleep.

I a m a t h o u s a n d w i n d s t h a t b l o w,

I a m t h e d i a m o n d s g l i n t s o n s n o w,

I am the sunlight on ripened grain, I am the gentle autumn rain.

I am the soft stars

W h e n y o u a w a k e i n t h e m o r n i n g ’s h u s h I am the swift uplifting rush

of quiets birds in circled flight,

I am the soft stars that shine at night.

D o n o t s t a n d a t m y g r a v e a n d c r y, I am not there, I did not die.

that shine at night.

David was more than just a cousin to us. He was pretty much the sixth brother in our family.

I know what it’s like to stay with cousins who are much younger, and I realize now what kind of efforts he made to have a connection with us.

Even with all of the challenges that he was facing, he really went above and beyond to connect with us and be a part of our family and because of that he became an older brother we all looked up to.

I believe that we were lucky enough to see the best and strongest side of him. We saw him overcome so much and work so hard to become the best version of himself. He was able to teach us so much. He taught us to be a fighter and get back up, even when life seems difficult and filled with demons. He taught us that even if the situation is the most uncomfortable experience you’ll ever face, if it’s the right thing, you do it anyways. He taught us no pain no gain. And on a lighter level, he just had fun with us. He took us out, the younger ones on their birthdays to wherever they wanted, played games with us, taught my brother and I how to snowboard, showed off his skateboarding abilities...

We had dinners with all 9 kids around the small kitchen table laughing at his jokes, and our family felt whole- he was a part of it just like I was.

It wasn’t all picture perfect- when he first came to live with us, him and my sister constantly fought. The only problem was that her friends weren’t too sympathetic to her struggles because they were too busy crushing on David to care. It took some time and some effort on both ends but they reached a point where there was mutual respect, understanding, and love.

Before he went to Israel, David came over for a few nights for dinner and to hang out with the family. It felt like the times he was living with us- eating dinner together, talking about anything and everything, and laughing from his jokes.

When he got to israel, he spent a Shabbat with me and my brother and sister at her apartment. Similar to his time with my younger siblings in New York, it felt like the times when he was by our house. We hung out, played games and laughed till we cried.

Dave- we love you so much and miss you more than words can express.

You had a larger than life presence that can never be replaced. And when our whole family is together, it’ll never truly be whole because a piece of us will be gone.

They say a person dies twice-

once when he takes his last breath and once when his name is last

said. Seeing the way Dave touched and inspired so many lives,

I know for a fact that there is

no way that David Aaron Dushey will die a second time.

Esther, David, Raymond, Gracie, Solomon, Joseph, Daniel, Frieda

I a m n o t g o n e

I am not gone

I remain here beside you Just in a different form

Look for me in your heart

And there you will find me

in our love which forever lives on

In those moments when you feel alone Look for me in your thoughts And there you will find me

in sweet memories that burn strong Ever y time a tear

forms in your beautiful eyes Look up to the heavens

And there you will see me

S m i l i n g d o w n f r o m G o d ’s g l o r i o u s s k i e s

David, I just got back from your arayat, as I sat in the back looking around all I saw was loved ones of yours amongst me. But what triggered me was they were all young. So many friendships and family members who loved you and will miss you so dearly, myself included. As I sat in my chair listening to people’s speeches I couldn’t control my tears, my sorrow and grief. If I would have written a speech it would’ve said something like this....

As I stood outside the shaare Zion door awaiting to march towards the chuppa of my best friends Lillie and Joey’s wedding , this blonde green eyed angel approached me. Looked me in the eye and without hesitation told me how beautiful I was. Not knowing my name or who I even was, he immediately asked to switch and have the honor to march with me. All I could think was omg let me act cool and collected bc this guy is so handsome. That night sparked a fire and a connection and friendship that was destined to last for a long time.

Getting to know each other we came to realize that even though we may be on different paths of life it would never stop us from staying close and having each others back. It would never stop us from opening up and feeling comfortable to express how we feel in the now, past or even future thoughts. As he shared some several uphill battles I came to recognize the warrior in him.

The warrior that even though pain resonated within, it never stopped him from wanting to better himself and grow. All he wanted was to be acknowledged, accepted, needed, wanted, loved, cared for, supported, and above all, do good. He would say things like, when am I going to find love already, I can’t wait to find a wife and marriage

like Tara and her husband. How do you deal with your negative thoughts and anxiety that come to your mind?

What do you think I could do to better myself. And with a quick response he would then say “your not gonna believe me, your gna be so proud, I’ve been eating kosher, I’ve been keeping Shabbat, I’ve been only chilling with good people, I’ve been putting on my teffiln and going to classes while praying as soon as I wake up”. But I was always proud of him, I was always supportive no matter what. I was lucky to have met david at his best years. Years of sobriety and taking his life back into his own hands. I never knew a different David, and although he told me about the past David it never effected the way I looked at him in that present moment. No Matter how long his past book would have been, and trust me he even mentioned how there wouldn’t be enough pages to write his story and how he lived 5 different lives. He told me about his family and how he was a look a like of his dad. He told me about his mom and how he loved visiting her in Miami and how he would talk to her everyday like a best friend. He would tell me how amazing Of a sister Tara was and how she would invite him over for the best cooked dinner and how cool her and her husband were to live in Williamsburg, and how he looked up to them both. He told me how much he loved kids and his cousins. He mentioned how his auntie aurite was a pillar in his life a pillar that took him in as a son and gave him the support he yearned for at that given time. He would send me snaps of cuddles with the kids while cracking jokes with the other cousins. He even was so worried when his 19 year old cousin was

getting married, just like any older brother would feel for his baby sister. He would praise the Hakim family and tell me how much he loved being around them. He would tell me about his Shabbat weekends with his best friend Henry and his beautiful wife and kids, “saying I feel so good when I’m here its like I’m with family” always acknowledging the beauty of family time, togetherness, unity and appreciated Shabbat for allowing him to see it.

I Remember practically sharing our birthdays knowing we were both Aquarius and sending each other the cutest texts. I could close my eyes and vividly see you smiling at me with your rosy cheeks and perfect hair cut. I could vividly remember the day we had a spontaneous photo shoot in prospect park I was ready to quit my job and sign as your manager/agent. I remember our Starbucks car rides as our first visit to William vale. I remember you saying “I feel safe when I talk to you. I know you don’t judge me. And since we started talking you have helped me unconsciously reach new levels, you are a huge inspiration in my life” or you make me so happy” but truth David you made me feel the same way always.

I wish I was able to give you more, But I could look back wish, pray, or bug myself for all of what I could’ve done, but Hashem ultimately knows all the answers.

And Hashem obviously wanted you closer to him. So as I write this letter all I could say is my heart will never forget you, our connection and bond will never dwindle down and You will always be close to my heart. Forever and always. I love you and miss you every second.

Written by a close friend.

Yo u w i l l n o t s e e m e So you must have faith.

I wait for the time when we can soar together again, b o t h a w a r e o f e a c h o t h e r.

Until then, live your life to its fullest and when you need me, just whisper my name in your heart, I will be there.

- EMILY DICKINSON

stories by all

There are some who bring a light so great to the world that even after they have gone, the light remains.

who loved him

Grandma Rhona:

One year when David was in his teens, I would say he was about 17, he stayed with me for several days. Of course we had a good time and I can still hear him laughing. He was going out one evening to a club and he went into the guest room and got dressed. When he came out he said: Grandma, how do I look? I said: Absolutely handsome, and he said: OK. But it didn’t end there. When he came into the living room again, he had a different type of top, a different pair of pants on and he said: Now how do I look? I said: You look so handsome, but you looked handsome in the first outfit. He said: OK. He went back-and-forth, in and out of the room, I would say at least 7 to 8 times and came out wearing something different each

time. He had to look just perfect. Knowing David you can relate to that. Then when I went into his room his clothes were thrown all over the bed and we both started to laugh because I said: David, all these outfits on the bed make you look very handsome.

But Grandma, he said to me, you know how I am and this is the outfit I chose for tonight, and I said: Ok, have a good time, but your clothes on the bed will also have a good time. His smile, his laughter and his joking around with me will always remain in my heart forever. I always loved when he stayed with me from infancy to a handsome adult because he brightened up my days.

Love Grandma Rhona

Because he lived, there is more love in the world than there would have been without him.

Grandma Esther

Ta r a E l i a u :

We will never forget this year ... 2018 was the last time we spent with David and 2019 was a year that we had to develop a new, closer and more spiritual connection with him. It’s a year we learned more about him than we ever knew... through different people and stories. A year we found a new way to talk to him. A year that we raised $50K in his name and started a clothing brand to honor him. A year that we got to connect and communicate with him through ways we never experienced or thought possible. A year we promised to love him, keep him close and never stop bonding with him. 2019 will be with us forever, and David will be in our hearts

Death ends a life, but not a relationship.

- JACK LEMMON

Barbra Panzer:

When David was a little boy, we loved to spend time together. Living in New Jersey, I would come over to babysit at a moment’s notice. Like everyone, I couldn’t get enough of David’s outgoing personality and that infectious smile of his.

David was four years old and Charlene was out running errands. It was winter and we were playing in the basement with a space heater providing wellneeded warmth. Suddenly, I smelled something burning and started to panic. I quickly unplugged the heater and ushered David upstairs, safe and out of harm’s way. Growing up in South Florida, space heaters were entirely foreign to me. Not completely sure of what to do, I thought it would be best to call the fire department and have someone check things out. The non-emergency dispatcher asked if she could send a unit over and I agreed, expecting one or two workers in a car.

A few minutes later, I heard the faint sound of sirens in the distance. The sirens became louder and louder, until it sounded like they were right outside. Through the window were two massive fire trucks speeding down Bedford Avenue with lights flashing and sirens blaring.

David immediately ran to the front window to secure a front-row seat. His eyes lit up as seemingly endless firemen in full gear charged through the front door, axes in hand. David was loving every minute of it and flashing his singular incredible smile. It was so like David, who always immersed himself in the middle of the action.

Thankfully, there were no fires to fight, and all the commotion was for nothing. For David, it was one of many fun adventures, and something that we would laugh and talk about for years to come.

Sari Panzer:

When I decided to go to college at the University of Pennsylvania, my first thought was how amazing it would be to be able to see my cousins, David and Tara, more often than I did growing up in Orlando.

You can imagine my excitement when one night, my phone lit up with a text from David letting me know that he was near my campus. I immediately texted my friends and told them that I would have to reschedule our evening plans, knowing that nothing could be better than a night of laughing and catching up with David. I would drop anything for the chance to see his smiling face and be wrapped up in one of his legendary hugs, the kind of hug that only David could give and immediately made you feel like the most important person in the world.

I responded immediately that I was thrilled to see him, to let me know where he was, and that I would meet him anywhere he wanted to go in Philadelphia. I waited for a response. All of a sudden, the three dots that told me he was typing disappeared. Oh no, I thought, did he make other plans already?! I wouldn’t have been surprised if he did – David made friends everywhere he went and undoubtedly had a long list of people who would love to see him in Philly.

A moment later, my phone lit up again. I’m in Princeton, he said. My heart sank as I realized that without a car, I had little hope of making the hourlong trip to New Jersey, but I couldn’t help but laugh a little. While distinguishing Ivy League schools from one another may not have been David’s strong suit, his big heart was always in the right place.

Raymond Dusi:

David – my cousin, my brother, and in some ways my role model.

Growing up, David had some rough years and he fell to unimaginable places. At age 23 he decided to turn over a new leaf, and completely restart his life. What he then accomplished between the ages of 23 until his passing at 29 was incredible to witness firsthand.

First and foremost, David went from living independently to living under his aunt and uncle’s roof. He went from living on his own to joining a family of ten, something that isn’t so easy to do.

Furthermore, he didn’t just move into the house, rather he became part of the family. Dave was just like another older brother. He hung out with us, took us out for ice cream, went ice skating with us, taught my brother and me how to snowboard. It wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows – we fought sometimes too, but that’s part of being a family.

That in itself is a huge accomplishment. Now being an older cousin who partly lives with younger cousins, I can appreciate what it takes to forge that connection and be a part of the family – especially with the age gap that he faced. Even more so, he was simultaneously going through something much greater and the fact that he so effortlessly infused himself into the family still amazes me.

A few years later, after David had already moved out of our house and I was already in Israel along with two other siblings, I heard the news that he had decided to come to Israel for a few months to learn.

He had always been searching for spiritual meaning in his life and to connect to God, and he took a huge step toward achieving that. I, along with my siblings

here in Israel, was thrilled to hear that he was coming.

As soon as he got here, it was like the old times back when he lived with us. We talked, laughed, hung out together, spent some shabbats together. However, although David looked great from the outside, he was still struggling inside. As hard as he fought, addiction eventually got the best of him.

Although his ending was neither comforting nor pleasant, as I look back at those last six years I can only marvel at his achievements. To go from where he was at age 23 to learning in Israel at 29 is no small feat. To turn his life around in such a way where his sole focus was to become a better version of himself, in every aspect, is something we should all strive for on our own level. And even though at the end of the day he didn’t win and succumbed to the constant battle, the fact that he changed his whole attitude on life, and believed in himself that he can be great, can still win, was huge.

I still remember sometimes seeing David sit at the table at home, putting on tefillin and praying with the tremendous kavana that he was able to muster. I would think about where he came from and where he was right then, and realize that although I may have been more observant and knowledgeable religiously than him at that moment, if I put in even half as much effort, I could be much greater than I am. This is a lesson we can all learn from Dave – in order to reach the heights that he reached, it took his all. If we applied as much effort in our own lives, with our own battles, think how great we can be. How much we can accomplish. And in that way David is my role model.

David Dusi:

When I was first told that Cousin David was going to come live with us a for a little bit, the one thing that stands out is how excited I was. When I got to school the next day, I was so excited I told all my friends Cousin David was moving in, like I won the lottery. My friends were so confused as to why I was so excited, but if they only knew David they would have understood instantly. David had this aura to him; whenever he was around, there was always someone laughing. David was the type you can talk to about anything, whether it be from dahaking around to DMCs, he was always there for others. One of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned was from David - watching him get up every day and fight through each day, slowly turning his life around, had a huge effect on my life. I’ve learned that no matter what life is throwing at you, don’t let it bring you down. Get up and fight it because at the end of the day you’ll come out stronger. I miss you Cousin David, I wish you were still here with us so I can tell you all about my army experiences, learn more Torah with you and just dahak around like we used to.

Joseph Dusi:

I remember how David used to take Salomon and me places on our birthdays since our birthdays are a week apart. One year he took us to Carvel and we got these huge waffle bowls. Another year he took us to Dillon’s Candy Shop and we got sick stuff. It was a lot of fun. I remember him coming for dinner often. I always loved when he came over.

Esther Salem:

The last time I saw David, he was in my apartment, staying over for Shabbat. He rushed in late, as usual, and while I prepped for the meal we talked and caught up on life. It wasn’t just small talk. I was always able to have a real and raw conversation with David, he had an openness about him that made delving into deep conversations easy. While chopping up salads, we talked about what it means to be a practicing Jew, the hardships and the benefits of it.

I loved that about him. I loved how he was always so open minded, interested in hearing a different point of view. The way he was with people, the way people were able to open up around him and feel so comfortable, it inspired me. I may not be able to have another Shabbat with him but I know that his life, and the way he interacted with those he loved, will stay with me and continue to impact me forever.

Salomon Dusi:

David was the older brother who never tried to beat me up or bother me. I always wanted to be around him because he was cool and a nice role model to me.

Gracie Dusi:

I have a lot of great memories of David Cousin, especially from the time when he was living with us. Those years had many ups and downs but ultimately Dave became one of us - my sixth brother.

I remember helping him paint his room when he first moved in. I remember the way the kitchen table felt even smaller but so much more whole at dinner time. I remember him driving me and my siblings around in his cool car. I remember playing basketball on the mini hoop with him. I remember our classic Friday night table where he was a staple. I remember the way he teased us just like older brothers do. I remember how he laughed and how much he made us laugh. One memory that I have was years before David lived with us. It’s a foggy memory because I was little but David Cousin had come to visit and I clearly remember just being so excited to see him.

Visits from David Cousin were the best. I love and miss you so much Dave, I wish you were able to come visit us today.

Daniel Dusi:

When I think of David, the first thing that comes to mind is him coming in the side door just when we were finishing kiddush. He was usually late. But I loved when he came. I remember when my mom told us that David was coming to live with us - I was at my friend at the time. I was so happy and excited to hear, I told my friend right away. I remember when he came we all helped him paint his room with him.

In the beginning I did it wrong so he taught me how to paint the right way. The biggest memory I have with David is one year on my birthday he took me to Moisha’s to buy candy. He took me in his cool car and let me sit in the front. He drove really fast and it was so much fun!

We t a l k a b o u t H e a v e n b e i n g s o f a r a w a y.

I t ’s w i t h i n s p e a k i n g d i s t a n c e ...

– DWIGHT L. MOODY

“David, how you gonna get down a hill after eating that?

Not to mention the 30-minute wait for that cheese to melt down?!”... “Stevie, I want Onion Soup!” Enough said.

What Daivd wants, David gets. OK….so we (all) waited for the ceramic bowl filled with a thick bubbling cheese to bakeup and bubble over the ceramic. He proceeded to twirl the cheese and eat the hot soup. He liked it…it was so good, he said.

Stevie Byer: I loved that kid!

I will never forget our ski trip to Mt Tremblant together, as if it were just last winter. It was freezing cold and snowing. Charlene, David and I disembarked from the Gondola on top of the mountain.

One wanted a blue hill, the other a black diamond, the other a double black diamond… but David was hungry. And we all know how David loved his food.

I reminded him that we had a dinner reservation for Swiss Fondue that night, but David said, “Stevie I want lunch.” So we changed course and diverted straight into the chalet. It was packed! We could barely find a place to sit. Personally, I’m not a big eater when I ski because I find it slows you down for the rest of the day but David needed to eat!

We settled in, found a good spot to camp-out, then hit the cafeteria to get our respective refreshments.

David was nowhere to be found… I finally found him lined-up on the other side of the chalet in the special Onion Soup au Gratin queue…a special “cooked-toorder” line-up in a packed chalet on top of the hill, to say the least!

Hours later, enter the “Fondue dinner”… the raclette was dripping (cheese) onto anything we (David) could put underneath it. We laughed so much. That was such a fun dinner. One of my all-time favorites.

The first run the next morning…. David wiped-out so badly he couldn’t snowboard for the rest of the trip. From the Au Gratin lunch to the Fondue dinner, the kid completely lost his agility and ability to snowboard on our last day…twisted his leg and everything! It was a mess.

From that day onward, his new name became “Fromage.”

I miss him so bad.

With love, Stevie

Michele Hakim:

David it was an honor to have known you. A special man with an amazing heart!! I will never forget the first time I met you, standing outside of school next to my son Joey. You were both just 3 years old, waiting to be picked up. I walked over to get my son and right next to him was you, David, a beautiful smiley boy with a face of an angel. Joey turned to me and asked if you could come over to play. From that day on you were in our lives and our hearts. Play dates turned to sleepovers and skate parks, summers in camp, overnights and tons of fun!!

Time passed so quickly. Now you were grown men and you never stopped coming over as often as you could!

Joey got married and some shabbats he wasn’t at home, but that didn’t stop you because you knew I would make your favorite Shabbat foods. And you still had the rest of the Hakims to hang out with! We loved to have you over.

We were so excited when you said you were coming for shabbat .

So many memories go through my mind when I think of you, David. You always had a place in my heart as if you were my own child. You were always thought of and always a part of our family. It’s really hard to believe that

you’re not here with us any longer. They say time will heal a broken heart. It’s going to take a really long time, but then hopefully Mashiah will come and we can all be together again!!

Your smile, your laugh, your hugs and kisses will never be forgotten. You were so warm, pleasant and always polite.

Your favorite place to go when you got to my house was the snack drawer. You said it reminded you of when you were a kid and we had the best snacks. You would go straight to the drawer every time you came over.

Till today, every time I go food shopping I fill the snack drawer and think of you. Every time I make crunchy spaghetti I think of you. I remember when you decided to go on a diet and you asked if I would help you make your prepared daily meals? You requested grilled chicken, broccoli and brown rice for 7 days straight! You were so excited when we finish preparing them. You went home with a huge smile on your face.

Always with us!! I love you. You will always be in our hearts.

Message from David to S a c h a Fo u r n e l :

“Hey man, just wanted to wish you a happy birthday and let you know that I’m thinking about you and wish you all the best this year!!! I know it’s late where you are but wanted to make sure I give some brotherly advice to take with you. I’m not sure what you’re up to these days but live it up to the fullest bro cuz 18-22 can be some of the best times of your life!! Try new things, take risks, fail, learn things, fail again, do it all now when you don’t have any major responsibilities!! And go out and live it up this weekend!! Enjoy yourself bro! Talk to you soon. DD”

A l e x a n d r a Fo u r n e l :

David, I remember the first time I met you at your mum’s place.

Your radiant smile, your beautiful eyes, your debonair style and warm personality could not go unnoticed...

It was a happy moment; what happened next still seems unreal to me.

I suffered your loss through my children who were terribly affected and spoke so highly of you, telling funny anecdotes, and also through your lovely mother Charlene, with whom I feel I have a connection, especially since this tragedy.

As a mum, I can feel her pain even at impalpable moments like parties, dinners, summer vacations.

When everyone is happy and light, I am thinking about her and her loss after losing her baby.

The love of her life is gone!

Everything must seem so vain!

I admire her courage in all these painful situations and since your passing, I also have discovered how deep and loving a human being she is.

I feel closer to her for all these reasons.

I am writing these words and I am crying while I am writing them because I must say your passing somehow has changed my life. I see things and events through a different perspective.

I appreciate, I cherish the happy moments with my family and loved ones to the fullest.

I don’t allow myself to be down over silly things and tend to focus more on the essential values of life and people rather than material ones.

Material is replaceable, the ones we love are not.

However, the memory of those we love lives in our hearts and no doubt in G-d’s heaven.

May you rest In peace, knowing that you are forever in our hearts and in our sweetest memories.

E v a Fo u r n e l :

In just one word, from what I can bear witness, David was so fun. He was willing to learn and appreciate anything new and unknown to him and made everyone around him feel so valued, especially me. It was simple things like wanting to check out the music I was listening to and recommending me some music, or talking about horror movies with me, or even back when I was in middle school and I was teaching him how to use musical.ly. He put value in those simple moments. David, you were a goofball, and a brotherly one, who made me feel like the cool older brother from New York’s funny little sis from Miami, and even though I was just about ten years old when you met me, you really treated me like I was family you’d casually known forever. Miss you everyday.

S o p h i e Ta w i l :

It was 28 years ago when I first laid eyes on the most precious blue eyed little boy. On that day he captured my heart forever. This is the effect he had on people from a very young age and to meet him was to instantly love him. Over the years I was privileged to watch him grow into the most wonderful, loving young man. He became a very close friend to all of my boys, creating a friendship that would last until the end of his young life.

Through the years we spent time nurturing an amazing friendship with Charlene and Sauly, and shared many wonderful times together creating memories with the kids that would last a lifetime.

Over the past couple of years I was lucky enough to reconnect with David, as he spent almost an entire summer by my son Henry’s house. I would go there every Saturday and watch him interact with my granddaughters in a way that completely melted my heart. Sophie adored him and loved every second that he was there. She would sit with him for hours and just enjoy the time she had with him, and the twins would cuddle up in his arms and just smile.

He truly loved my little girls and they loved them back.

After the summer we had him over many shabbats and he would always put in his request for kebbe cherry just like my own kids would. The minute he walked through the door he would kick off his shoes and throw them in the middle of my living room just like the rest of the boys. He was one of them.....one of MY BOYS. I loved him like a son, and he always told me how much he loved me.

Although we all go through hardships in our lives, and I’m sure David had his share, the most wonderful thing about him is that you would never know it. All he had to do was smile and you were sold, his life seemed perfect. His smile could light up a room, his gorgeous face could melt your heart instantly. He was pure raw love, pure raw beauty, pure raw charm. He didn’t have to say anything, just his presence would make you happy.

David made a difference in this world and every person that came in to his life was blessed to know him. We all had so much to learn from him and we did. I was one of the lucky ones and for that I am very grateful. I loved him instantly 28 years ago, I loved him through the years, and I will love him for eternity.

Joyce Cohen:

One year without you Dave. Each day goes by and it doesn’t get any easier. You came to say goodbye the night you left for Israel. We were both so excited since you had not been there since your birthright trip. We hugged and said goodbye. Little did I know that we would never see each other again.

I would no longer have you to turn to for advice, to hang out with, to laugh with. David, you were the big brother I never had. My rock, my best friend. You were part of my household. My family, friends, and neighbors knew and loved you. You were part of our family. You came over for BBQ’s, holidays, and to hang out. We all loved having you here with us.

David, even during times when you had your own struggles, you were still someone I could always count on to lift my spirit and make me laugh. Your loss has taught me not to take things for granted and cherish what I have. That there’s more to life and to our purpose in life than what’s just physically in front of us.

David, you left a profound impact on all of us! You have brought people together in so many ways, especially in prayer. Our dedication to read Tehilim for you each week is a testament to what you mean to all of us.

We will continue to pray for you and do hesed in your memory, always.

Although you’re not here physically, I feel connected to your neshama. I wear your sweatshirt and put your favorite music on. I sometimes talk to you when I need to let things out. Accepting this has been very difficult, but my emunah in Hashem comforts me in knowing that you are resting in peace.

I love you David. I will always cherish your memory and carry with me the bond we shared. I have faith that one day, all your loved ones will be able to embrace you again.

May your neshama have an Aliyah.

Love you and missing you beyond words.

Love, your cousin Joyce

Robbie Sasson:

My relationship with David goes back over 25 years, he was my very first friend. One of my favorite memories of us as kids is of our sleepovers. We would play Nintendo64 for hours on end while drinking countless Yoo-hoo’s. My mom would buy a case just for us and we would drink until our stomachs couldn’t take any more.

As we got older, we took on new hobbies like skateboarding, snowboarding, guitar, and much more.

David was always the best at whatever we did. He was truly multi-talented and I think many people envied him for his cool personality.

Between high school and college, David and I had gone our separate ways. Many years passed where we barely saw each other, but this would only be temporary, as our paths would cross again.

One random Friday morning David and I ran into each other at a Dunkin Donuts in Brooklyn. We spent the next few hours bonding, catching up, and reminiscing of old times. Moreover, we both shared about difficult things we were facing in our own personal lives. We discovered we were both battling many of the same issues. This set the tone for our re-born again friendship.

He was empathetic and I found solace in knowing I had a real friend in David.

There is one specific day I will never forget. I made a poor decision so he called my mother straight away.

When I confronted him about it, he replied with, “I will throw you under the bus every single time, if it means saving your life.” — this sums up who David was. Caring, compassionate, and above all he LOVED

to see his friends happy, healthy and thriving. He was truly a best friend.

Our last interaction was at Wok Republic on Ben Yehuda St. in Tel Aviv. I ordered Chicken Satay and David had the Shanghai Noodles. I can remember the entire day in full detail.

I wish I had one more chance to say I love you before you crossed over to the other side, but you were ripped away from us so fast without warning.

We started our journey in life as best friends and I don’t take for granted we got to spend your final days together.

Today, you are buried side-by-side with my grandfather — Robert Sasson — whom I share the same name with. I believe this world works in mysterious ways and it’s almost like I am right there with you. Robbie & David side-by-side forever.

I love you and you will always be in my heart, buddy.

Rest easy until we meet again.

Lisa Arking:

David Cousin, as he was called in the Dusi house, was probably the best introduction I could have gotten to having Dusi nephews. They have this innate ability to know exactly what buttons to push to drive you crazy but then a smile flashes across their face, your heart melts, and you can’t help but forgive them; they’re irresistibly lovable. As we both grew older, David teased me less and what was left was a whole lot of love. I mostly saw him Friday nights, both of us appendages to the Dusi family. I always got a big smile and a warm shabbat shalom hug from him. Ok, so maybe he teased me one last time as adults when he found my jswipe profile and showed it to the kids.

Rachel Angel:

We shared a love for snowboarding so one would think the time we went snowboarding together would be the day that stood out to me. But the remarkable thing about David was the way he touched my heart making ordinary interactions and regular days into adventures. I looked forward to tutoring him every time because it was a chance to connect with him and even as a child he knew how to evince a caring from the depths of my soul. And as he got older I continued to look forward to seeing him from time to time because in addition to his ability to connect, David’s love for fun and adventure was refreshing and infectious. His spark and joy will always light up a part of my heart.

Caroline Gadeloff:

There are so many amazing things to say about you, David, but the one thing that always stood out was his smile. He always had the most beautiful smile on his face and constantly made me laugh with his jokes and his sense of humor. We spent 3 months together and it was honestly one of the best summers I have ever had. I remember the laughs, the late night talks, he always knew exactly what to say. David, you will always hold a special place in my heart, and you will forever be missed by me and so many others.

Shaina Goot:

Just woke up from a bad dream that’s a nightmare. I don’t know why I’m even writing you because you cannot see this but I miss you so much. I miss your bright smile and your bright eyes. I miss picking you up with my grandma and having you eat veggie burgers with us. I miss the look on my brother’s face when he knew you were coming over to hang out.

You had the best hopes for me in life. I finally opened my own business. It’s hard work but I’m doing it and pushing through. I met a nice Jewish guy.

He’s sassy like you, you guys would have been friends.

My family misses you. I miss you. I hope you’re in heaven and in peace.

Love always, Shaina

Fr a n c e s a n d Moshe Arking:

Grace Arking:

David was the kind of guest we would eagerly await.

I’d invite him for Shabbat, and my face would light up when he walked through the door. The first thing you saw when he walked in was that million dollar smile that made your heart melt. He also had these beautiful eyes from which you couldn’t look away. David was so loving and always had perfect manners. He went around saying Shabbat shalom to everyone, and you could practically feel the charisma as his cousins all followed him around, vying for his attention. David never failed to compliment the food, thanking us over and over for having him.

Before leaving, he’d excuse himself, saying Shabbat shalom and another few thank yous but we always made him promise to come back, and we meant it.

I wish he came more often, and I wish I took the time to really have a long conversation with him. He was an absolute delight, a perfect gentleman, and

It’s hard to believe that a year has gone by since David passed away.

He had a special way about him that made people instantly fall in love with him.

We called him cousin David because there are so many Davids in the family. Whenever my kids heard that he would be joining whatever activity we were doing, they would cheer out loud. He came to us for our annual hannukah party and for some holiday meals.

David was always a pleasure to be around and made you feel special too. Full of manners and compliments, it’s no wonder we always loved seeing him.

I’m glad we got to see a lot of him by the Dusi house.

His beautiful face and smile will be missed. But more importantly, the love that shone through his heart and eyes will never be forgotten.

Manny Mirakov:

David was definitely one of a kind. There was something about him that made everyone want to be around him. It’s insane how much a person could change my life in a matter of a few months. I felt like I had known him forever. He was friends with EVERYONE. One thing I noticed is that he would always find the good in everyone no matter what or who they were. He was a fun person to go out with and just spend endless amounts of time with talking. His dorm room was the “hangout”. I’ll never forget how I first met him, “Hey man what do you think of this place, are you having a good time here?” he asked me during lunch one day. The first thing I noticed were his shoes as I was looking down getting ready to sit. Wow... yeezys I thought to myself. This guy must know about all the trends and fashion that’s in right now just like me. Then I looked up at that killer smile and thought: His teeth are definitely fake, haha. We started talking and the first question I asked was where he was from and he said Brooklyn.. he was the first person I met that was also from New York.

And our New York vibe just clicked and from there we got close. He was the first person I experienced a death with and it taught me so much about life and how anything can happen at any moment without notice. And how important it is to use the time we have here wisely. In the end I believe it was all meant to be. He really changed in the time he was in Israel and grew with religion a lot. He will be a person I will never forget and will always look up to. I have not stopped thinking about him since.

Shabbat with him but I know that his life, and the way he interacted with those he loved, will stay with

A s h l e y Fr a n k :

I am so saddened and tears are falling. I will never forget the smile and joy when I saw you in the flatiron dressed so dapper. I loved your energy. I am so sorry and I send my love to all of your family. I wish I knew. But you came into my thoughts while I walked past your office last week and I was thinking, why haven’t I heard from David? I guess I actually did hear from you in a spiritual way. Be good up there, you angel. I will never forget our funny chats together. You are a diamond.

Janie Gurfinchel:

Oh Dave, aside from being beautiful on the outside with the face of an angel - you were beautiful on the inside as well.

Dave always treated everyone with equal respect which is a quality that lacks today and something I very much admired in him. We always had such a good and carefree time together! It felt like he was my family. Dave was easily one of the funniest guys I’ve ever met, ALWAYS cracking me up to the point of tears. I remember his green juice + açaí phase, beach days on weekdays, deep life discussions, drives to visit clients, wynwood journeys, my first date with my husband (I didn’t want to go but Dave knew it would be good for me so he not only encouraged it but came along as well so I’d feel more comfortable), FaceTime sessions with my mama, office days with him and Char - Dave always giving 110% at work, Dave helping me move into my apartment and sitting with me on the couch after unpacking a few boxes and just staring into the ocean and that one time on FaceTime with his “Grams” when we both cried from laughing so hard - Grams had requested he repair something on her iPhone or computer but the entire communication between them was so sweet and funny.

As I write this and hit the rewind button to set my intention on Dave, I have my window open and the light dimmed low - my lightbulb has flickered 3 times and a yacht cruising by is playing music in Hebrew of all languages. In my 4 years of living here I’ve never heard Hebrew music come from this ocean...I have several angels and I’d like to think these signs are Dave letting me know it’s him and reminiscing with me as well.

Debbie Zemlinsky:

I had a very special connection with David from the moment we met. Charlene hired me to personal train him at his low moment in life. It was a struggle to come down and workout, but we made those times bonding experiences, talking about life, fitting in and what really mattered in life. I would see David through his ups and downs. He was always searching for truth and inspiring me to live in the moment. His infectious smile would light up the room, his desire for truth would awaken lost souls. The night I heard of the accident my life changed forever. Somehow connection with David became stronger, my prayers more sincere, being grateful for being alive daily. I wish I could change the outcome, but I know for sure he is watching over us all. He came to visit once at the house to tell me all is well. I have 2 doves come visit me at work and I always connect them to David, to remind me all is well. Life will never be the same! I am grateful for him being in my life and all the lessons he taught me. Love you David!

Ariel Sasson:

There’s a verb in Hebrew, (lefargen), that has no precise equivalent in English. Roughly translated, it means to rejoice in the success or achievements of others. It’s also the word I think best describes David’s greatest attribute. He must have been born with this gift. I remember watching him as a young boy playing basketball with my children and nephews in my mother-in-law’s backyard. Whenever one of them made a good play, David would be the first to offer a high-five. While skateboarding, if one of his friends pulled off a hard trick, David couldn’t wait to tell everyone what an amazing feat he had just witnessed. As he grew into a young man, he reveled in the success of his friends. He beamed with joy when he heard that one of his friends had been accepted to that school or landed that job. David’s enthusiasm was contagious. Whenever you were around him you couldn’t help but feel good. At times I sensed he felt he had a duty to lift the spirits of those around him.

The way David connected with people by having a genuine concern for what was going on in their lives can serve as an example for all of us. When we find ourselves becoming too self-absorbed with our own problems, let’s try to pause for a moment and reach out to our friends and family and ask about how they are doing. Let’s commit to doing an act of hesed for one person each day, even when we are consumed with our own challenges. This is the way David lived his life and it is the most fitting way that we can honor his memory.

Sarah Fisher:

David was a fighter. He had a vision of his own, and he did absolutely everything he could to make it his reality. And he was successful too. As many of you know, David got into commercial real estate in his late 20s. He’d come over with handmade flashcards, have me test him over and over. He was determined to pass that test, and he did exactly that on the very first try. Rather than easing into the industry, David dove in head first. He spent much of his time in my area of Astoria, NY, where he saw so much potential in all the small businesses and restaurants that were around there. He texted me one day while I was at work and he was at my apartment, “Sarah, can you give me a list of the best restaurants in your area? I am going to go door to door until someone believes

in me enough to expand.” I smiled, I was already so proud of the fire he had started within, all by himself.

So I sent him a list, one of which happened to be Mojave, a small Mexican spot right on 31st street and Ditmars. With a lot of persistence, he got them to hop on board. This was his very own lead. He brought it to his firm, and they ran with it. Months went by - this would now be the lead that landed him his very first signed deal for another location that they’re opening in NYC called Agave. He received the contract while in Israel. His passion, vision, and motivation worked together to become his reality.

That was all him. I am so proud to have known someone as tenacious as David Dushey. He was, and always will be, a leading force in my life.

Fre d d i e B i j o u : Cindy Benssousan:

David... our beautiful David with the most beautiful smile... nothing has changed from when I first met you as a little boy. The pretty little blond boy with the greatest personality that used to melt our hearts with his smile. This picture is exactly how I remember you boys...little rascals, running around the casino, camp, after camp, birthday parties, practicing your karate moves on each other and so so so much more!

As you got older I didn’t get to see you much but when I did, that smile just melted my heart the same way it did when I met you David, you are always with us in our hearts. There is not a single day that I don’t think about you. And every time I do, I see you with that beautiful smile. I love you, Cindy

There is so much I want to say that it’s hard to put into one message. I would like to share two stories of David. My oldest memory with you is when we were about 7 years old. While waiting to be picked up from karate we were messing around and I ended up doing a flying kick into the mirror, shattering it and busting my knee. I remember sitting on a chair with my knee bleeding. You came up to me and said “Wow. I can’t believe you’re not crying. You’re so brave.” My last memory with you is from a few years ago. We were sitting outside of a wedding speaking about a common dilemma we shared. Both of these times I gave you the impression that I was coping with the pain better than I really was. I was afraid, and even more afraid to show you any weakness. Most people deal with pain by convincing themselves that they are not afraid, but we always are. David, looking back at these two memories I understand what kind of person you were. Both in karate and at the wedding I was in a lot of pain but did not want admit it. Not to you and not even to myself. You were not afraid to admit your pain, not afraid to admit fault. You were never worried about being judged or showing weakness and that makes you the bravest person I know.

Sandra Guy:

David Cousin, as he was called in the Dusi house, was Hi. I looked through all of Davids pictures to see if there was one with you, his second mom, his aunt.

I dated David for a little back in 2014 while he lived with you, and he was such a good guy, great soul. He was around when my mom was sick - would talk to her, came to her shiva even after not speaking with me for a year. And I just wanted to say I am so sorry for your loss. He told me of your relationship and he really did call you his second mom. The letter you wrote at the service was extremely beautiful, I’m so sad he is gone, but he left an imprint for life, not only on me, but for so many which was proven today..

Zudy Shehebar:

David was one of the most caring and compassionate people I have ever met. The way he would go out of his way to help people was something very special and was something I always looked up to. I miss and think about you everyday!

Allison Bardavid:

I remember the day I met David. I was getting a ride home from the city and the person taking me home said David Dushey is going to meet us and come home with us. I wasn’t sure who he was. We drove the whole way and he said to drop him by his aunt on East 3 and O. Then it clicked. I went on about how much I love Aurit and her family and that was that. A little while later I went to Aurit’s house and David was there sitting on the couch, that’s when I really got to know him. It was so easy to talk to him. He was so warm, funny, and genuine. We spoke for a couple hours about casual things and about deep things as well. We were able to joke around but also ask each other for advice. David just had something to him, I really enjoyed the time I spent with him. Even though they were just a couple of times they were times I’ll never forget. David had a heart of gold and such a positive energy to him. I loved being around him and I looked forward to seeing him by Aunty Aurit.

The only lasting beauty is the beauty of the heart.

– Rumi

Leena Gurevich:

One of my favorite memories of David and me is when he met me for lunch in Soho and we sat and talked for hours. We talked about EVERYTHING… his dating life, his work, his relationship with his family, my dating life… and we just laughed and laughed.

Even though we only knew each other for a very short time, we felt so comfortable confiding in one another. He was like my little brother and I loved him.

I laughed at how adorable he always looked in his designer clothes and teased him about his perfect white teeth. He would often tell me, “if you were only 20 years younger we would be married.” I should have been so lucky...

Jake Cohen t o Ta r a E l i a u :

I wish I was able to say something sooner, earlier. I was probably fearful that I wouldn’t know what to say, maybe I’d say the wrong thing, or maybe there was no possible text I can send you that would have any meaning.

But I love you, and I’ve known you for so long, and I hope you remember just how much I loved and looked up to David. In many ways he was a hero to me. He was encouraging in the way he expressed himself artistically and creatively, and just the way he carried himself at all times, always vulnerable, always open and loving. I had heroes but none of them lasted as long as he did because he was always the one with the biggest heart. I remember your bat mitzvah so vividly. He and Jack Shamah dancing and creating a silly mosh pit. I so badly wanted to just dance with them because your brother was the coolest. Jack knocked me down on my ass, and David helped me up and showed me some dance moves.

I picked up a skateboard because of David. I bought pooka shell necklaces to be like David. I dyed my hair (with Sun-in, my mom wasn’t down with the real bleach stuff) to be like David. I listened to the Ramones and showed up to your surprise party in a Ramones shirt just because I heard from someone who heard it from someone that David liked the Ramones. I grew my hair long, I think I even tried speaking like him for a bit, smiling like him.

I was lucky enough to run into him at a time in my life where I didn’t really have much to live for. He was so supportive, he was always telling me to come to meetings, or to even just call him when I’m alone and to come hang out with him and grab some food or go to the gym. He was the best. You should have seen him in those rooms at Safe, he had a pulse on what everyone was doing, he kept it light, he kept everyone focused on getting healthy and working towards something.

I don’t know how the world works, I’d love to think that there’s a place where David is hanging out and watching all of this on a big screen tv and smiling.

But I do know for sure that at the very least I can carry him with me at all times, and treat people with the same compassion that he treated me with. It’s weird, David touched more lives in a more deep and personal way than we could ever know. I think so much of the things I’ve done in my life were subconsciously to be more like David. And what a good thing to try and be. He’s always gonna be my hero and I’ll always love him and I’m so sorry I didn’t say this sooner, Tara. I love you and I’ll always be the sensitive kid sitting behind you on the school bus, listening to his yellow walkman, ready to talk about anything.

Jake

Gadi Zohar:

David was a great help to me in early recovery. He helped a lot of people including myself. It’s crazy because when we were younger we used to look up to him skateboarding. I think seeing him in recovery a lot of people looked up to him in that same way; he was an example of what everyone wanted to strive to be. Honestly, just seeing a familiar face can be one of the most comforting and motivating things when you’re in that place, but David went above and beyond to make you feel like you weren’t alone at a time where you felt so isolated.

Joey Eliau:

David’s little sister is married to my little brother.

We met while they were dating and right away I saw so much of myself in him.

We shared so many interests and the similarities were obvious as soon as we met.

Dave would talk to me with with a level of respect and unprecedented admiration that I haven’t felt from anyone else. He would ask me questions and then ask more about even the smallest detail in my answer. You could tell how genuine he was with even the most basic question. He had a way about him and talking to him always made me feel special.

My favorite memory with Dave was the time he ate over for Shabbat in Brooklyn. We sat at the end of the table and Dave was telling me about a girl he liked. We laughed a lot that night and I could tell how much he appreciated Shabbat and the togetherness it brings.

I miss that genuine energy that David always had and will always remember him for that.

Rest easy DavidJoey Eliau

S a m m y Ye d i d :

David was my younger brother’s friend. I met him when he was about 13 and I around 15. I don’t know why our relationship developed into what it did maybe it was the purity of his soul, but we ended up making an agreement that if he’d come to shul to pray with me and study some Torah together each day, I’d buy him a surfboard (or skateboard - I don’t remember). It seemed new to David, so I bought him a siddur with an English translation and highlighted (I believe literally) the main prayers that should be said.

He appeared to be content with the new routine of running to catch the daily minyanim and the learning.

I felt he connected to it in a sincere pure way. He was never too embarrassed to ask for instructions on how to conduct himself in the shul and he displayed tremendous awe to it’s sanctity. (I remember him feeling it to be inappropriate to pray while wearing shorts.) We had a great summer together and we both kept our end of the deal. But we didn’t keep up.

I wasn’t shocked when I heard that over 15 years later David enrolled himself in a yeshiva. That’s where he connected.. I’ll miss him. My sister told me that in his tefilin bag they found an old highlighted siddur with an English translation. He had held on to it. We’ll hold on to his memory and hopefully do good things in his merit to elevate his soul in heaven.

Morris Manopla:

Rabbi Miller said countless times that our MAIN purpose in this world is to accomplish spiritually, following the Torah Hashem gave us at Mount Sinai.

And the Rabbi meant very well, this did not include the material world. Some people start accomplishing at a very early age. Some start at middle ages and some start at an old age. Unfortunately some people get blinded by the material world and they NEVER get to accomplish. And that, according to Rabbi Miller, is the biggest mistake a Jew can do because when he passes on there is NO second chance for ever and ever! As an example, Rabbi Akiva started his accomplishments at age 40.

David Ben Chana made a decision in his young age and decided to go to Israel and learn Torah, which is the ultimate purpose in life. For him to decide to drop every material thing in his life and to follow the Torah in Israel is what made David a HUGE Tzadik in Hashem’s eyes. The time he spent learning Torah is what Hashem wanted from him in his life and he DID IT!!!! HE SUCCEEDED!!!!

I knew David very well and every time I saw him I saw an angel in him. His face looked just like an angel. Always this fair skin with beautiful red cheeks.

Humbleness described him to the T! Not a mean bone in his entire body. He was what any parent would love to have as a child.

Jack Adjmi:

I went to Bay Ridge Prep with David. We used to have a special class session, just me and him with a great teacher. We would end up chatting about life and always ask questions. The principal, Dr Dealy, loved him and admired him more than a lot of the other kids. I remember when he would walk in his office, the principal didn’t want him to leave because he made him laugh and feel good, as the principal wasn’t always feeling his best.

David would walk in with the pure intention to make us feel happy. He always had a very strong light on him, he lit up the room with his smile. I always remember his smile... I remember him asking to see my Omega watch when he put it on he accidentally broke the metal band because his arm was so big as he tried closing it... Someone’s face is like a picture of someone’s neshama and David’s was filled with grace, love and light. I myself have had a hard life, I know our struggles, I cannot wait to see him when I go up :) He loves you.

Audrey Djmal:

I didn’t know David but in a way I feel like I did. I became friends with his “Aunt Aurit” a few years ago and whenever we were together she would mention her “nephew David.” Slowly I came to realize what a special relationship they shared. David meant the world to her and whenever she mentions him she gets tears in her eyes along with a little twinkle. She is always saying how much David gave to her and how she would have never traded what happened for the world. She is constantly showing me pictures of him and telling me about his larger than life personality.

David, your Aunt Aurit loved you more than anything and I know your beautiful smile will be forever in her heart.

Eddie Schneider:

Dear King David, I can’t believe it’s been a year since you have left this earth. It felt like yesterday that we were just smiling and chilling under the sunshine. You touched and inspired everyone who knew you. You had a gift with people on such a deep and sensitive level. You changed and helped so many with your patience and your experience. You were always there for everyone and you were the perfect role model. Your beautiful blonde hair, your shiny green eyes and that milliondollar smile melted all of our hearts. From the day we met that summer of 2017, we never stopped talking, you let me stay in your grandma’s house in Deal you invited me to your aunt and uncle’s and showed me delicacies and fine foods with your extended family who you loved so much. I respected you so much.

You taught me so much. And we always managed to have fun, and keep joking and laughing at life. You loved your Benz and always kept it clean and fresh like your haircut. One day you said “bro get a haircut you look like a bum.” You touched my hair and said, “what is this hair growing out of your ears? Trim that now!” You made fun of my clothes, but always with love. You looked at me and said “bro, what are those dungaree jeans?” I said, “they are diesel jeans.” You said, “they are baggy, 10 years ago it was in style.” You immediately gave me the clothes you wore and you gladly hooked me up with a fine tailored suit because I had no fashionable clothes… but I couldn’t keep up with your style. No one could. You WERE style! You literally gave me the shirt off your back.

I remember going to that barber with you and I wanted the guy who cut your hair to do mine

because it looked so fresh. Instead, I got a rookie barber and he ended up making me look like a fool.

You were laughing at first but then you said, “it’s not so bad bro you still look great, it will grow in.” This was how special you were.

While you were In Israel, we spoke a few times and I knew right away from your posts that you were happy and changing and that you were finding G-d.

One day I received a missed call from you, little did I know that would be the last missed call. It was a call I will always regret missing, as that would have been our last time talking and I never had a chance to say goodbye.

David, I loved you so much. I’m still trying to figure out how to live without you. I still have all your clothes you lent me, I wear a necklace around my heart that someone you loved got me, I wear your Dushey 5K gear each day. I will never find another friend like you, David, it just doesn’t exist. Life has been difficult since you left. I know you are watching over me because someone sent me a lifeboat, someone who knew you well called me, and asked me to join a program called Safe. The same program that saved so many lives and that you were involved in. I feel like I picked up where you left off. Your legacy will always live on and I will always carry out your legacy by helping and inspiring others, which you did so well. My dear angel, I love you, my brother.. Please continue to watch over us. Till we meet again, farewell my friend.

Always and Forever... In our hearts.

Aurit Dusi:

Many times we pray for an easy life without problems.

We pray to not struggle. What my life with David has taught me is that the struggle is what makes us stronger.

It’s what builds and refines our character. It’s what helps us develop into better people.

David and I used to say we don’t know why we had what we did. It made no sense that we should be as close as we were. We were an odd pair, pretty much as opposite as you can get. Yet we clicked. More than clicked. Connected in a very deep and real way. Looking back over the years and what became of us because of our relationship, I think I know why. It was one of those relationships where we both improved as a result.

When we made the decision to have David move in with us, we didn’t really know what we were getting into. All we knew was that here was a chance to help our nephew whom we loved. We worried about our kids, but hoped the life lessons they would learn through the experience would make it worth it in the end.

I look back and not only do I not have a single regret for opening our door, I am extremely grateful. Was it a fairytale? He moved in, stayed sober, got along with the kids, followed all the house rules.. Not at all. There were many low points. There were times I was ready to strangle him. There were times when I cried, yelled and wanted to just give up. Times when I didn’t know what I was doing and thought I was ruining my kids in the process.

But then there were those magical moments that made it all worth it. I was the lucky one who got the front row seat to his transformation. Who got to see first hand how he struggled and overcame so many obstacles.

Observe him come out of his shell and take notice of the world and people around him. Giving up a night out so he can stay home and babysit. Offering to go shopping

for me or any other family member when they needed.

Seeing him dressed so sharp, walking out the door on his way to his first business trip. A few months earlier who would have thought that was even possible? Watching him grapple with his disappointment and finally accept when I told him no to something he wanted, and then on top of it come back and thank me for the no. The pride I felt when he confidently got up in front of a room full of high school boys to share his experiences and then answer their many questions with his unique sense of humor. And then there were those moments with the kids. My heart would feel so full watching the love grow between them. I loved watching them talk, laugh and interact together.

And not only was he changing, I was changing as well.

He taught me: Courage. Empathy. Understanding.

Acceptance. Patience. Introspection. Communication.

Forgiveness. Love.

I wouldn’t be who I am today if it wasn’t for what we went through. It was hard, so very hard, but the challenges pushed me to dig deeper and reach higher.

The returns were more than I ever thought possible.

Reading what my kids wrote about David only solidifies the opinion that we made the right choice. I believe we all grew and gained tremendously.

Dave, you were one of my greatest gifts. As I often told you, you had a special soul and I was lucky to have you the way I did.

It’s still hard going through life without David. There’s a gaping hole he once used to fill. But if I had to do it all over again, I wouldn’t hesitate for a second. I would once again choose love and life, because in essence, that’s what it was. Even if it means hurting that much more in the end. It was all worth it.

It was all wor th it.

To l i v e i n h e a r t s we leave behind is not to die.

– THOMAS CAMPELL